#come to realize that there isn't as much of an audience for fic writing as there is for art

[unma]

So I uh...

I might have gone crazy on what was supposed to be a short fic. It's only been like... shit it's been 4 hours (and half of that was lazing around while the other was full-focused fic writing). It's midnight and while I'm scared of losing all this energy, I'm 100% sure I'll crash asleep if I keep going so I'm calling it here for the night. Here's a little sneak peek of what I wrote though (and I think it's obvious what day I'm continuing off from this).

Do note that this could change depending on how I feel about it later, this is from a first draft after all.

“Sans?”

The skeleton opened his eyes, snapping out of his little flashback. “Hm? Need something, princess?”

“You just seemed out of it for a moment.”

The princess in question was busy sorting through her inventory as she prepared yet another escapade. Another carefree waltz through the Underground away from the prying eyes of her parents. She’d gone on many now, so much so it was routine to her. Sans never did stop her, learning after the first time that once Frisk set her mind to something, she’d do it.

So he’d taken to stalking her as she went about these.

Stalking was perhaps not the right word. For one, Frisk was always aware of this. Another thing was this was for her safety. Frisk wasn’t hated by many, on the contrary, she was loved by many of the monsters. A human who actually cared about monsters was something hopeful for them. It made them believe that things could be better one day if there were other humans like Frisk.

“Just thinking about the past, is all.”

[archaeren]

How I learned to write smarter, not harder

(aka, how to write when you're hella ADHD lol)

A reader commented on my current long fic asking how I write so well. I replied with an essay of my honestly pretty non-standard writing advice (that they probably didn't actually want lol) Now I'm gonna share it with you guys and hopefully there's a few of you out there who will benefit from my past mistakes and find some useful advice in here. XD Since I started doing this stuff, which are all pretty easy changes to absorb into your process if you want to try them, I now almost never get writer's block.

The text of the original reply is indented, and I've added some additional commentary to expand upon and clarify some of the concepts.

As for writing well, I usually attribute it to the fact that I spent roughly four years in my late teens/early 20s writing text roleplay with a friend for hours every single day. Aside from the constant practice that provided, having a live audience immediately reacting to everything I wrote made me think a lot about how to make as many sentences as possible have maximum impact so that I could get that kind of fun reaction. (Which is another reason why comments like yours are so valuable to fanfic writers! <3) The other factors that have improved my writing are thus: 1. Writing nonlinearly. I used to write a whole story in order, from the first sentence onward. If there was a part I was excited to write, I slogged through everything to get there, thinking that it would be my reward once I finished everything that led up to that. It never worked. XD It was miserable. By the time I got to the part I wanted to write, I had beaten the scene to death in my head imagining all the ways I could write it, and it a) no longer interested me and b) could not live up to my expectations because I couldn't remember all my ideas I'd had for writing it. The scene came out mediocre and so did everything leading up to it. Since then, I learned through working on VN writing (I co-own a game studio and we have some visual novels that I write for) that I don't have to write linearly. If I'm inspired to write a scene, I just write it immediately. It usually comes out pretty good even in a first draft! But then I also have it for if I get more ideas for that scene later, and I can just edit them in. The scenes come out MUCH stronger because of this. And you know what else I discovered? Those scenes I slogged through before weren't scenes I had no inspiration for, I just didn't have any inspiration for them in that moment! I can't tell you how many times there was a scene I had no interest in writing, and then a week later I'd get struck by the perfect inspiration for it! Those are scenes I would have done a very mediocre job on, and now they can be some of the most powerful scenes because I gave them time to marinate. Inspiration isn't always linear, so writing doesn't have to be either!

Some people are the type that joyfully write linearly. I have a friend like this--she picks up the characters and just continues playing out the next scene. Her story progresses through the entire day-by-day lives of the characters; it never timeskips more than a few hours. She started writing and posting just eight months ago, she's about an eighth of the way through her planned fic timeline, and the content she has so far posted to AO3 for it is already 450,000 words long. But most of us are normal humans. We're not, for the most part, wired to create linearly. We consume linearly, we experience linearly, so we assume we must also create linearly. But actually, a lot of us really suffer from trying to force ourselves to create this way, and we might not even realize it. If you're the kind of person who thinks you need to carrot-on-a-stick yourself into writing by saving the fun part for when you finally write everything that happens before it: Stop. You're probably not a linear writer. You're making yourself suffer for no reason and your writing is probably suffering for it. At least give nonlinear writing a try before you assume you can't write if you're not baiting or forcing yourself into it!! Remember: Writing is fun. You do this because it's fun, because it's your hobby. If you're miserable 80% of the time you're doing it, you're probably doing it wrong!

2. Rereading my own work. I used to hate reading my own work. I wouldn't even edit it usually. I would write it and slap it online and try not to look at it again. XD Writing nonlinearly forced me to start rereading because I needed to make sure scenes connected together naturally and it also made it easier to get into the headspace of the story to keep writing and fill in the blanks and get new inspiration. Doing this built the editing process into my writing process--I would read a scene to get back in the headspace, dislike what I had written, and just clean it up on the fly. I still never ever sit down to 'edit' my work. I just reread it to prep for writing and it ends up editing itself. Many many scenes in this fic I have read probably a dozen times or more! (And now, I can actually reread my own work for enjoyment!) Another thing I found from doing this that it became easy to see patterns and themes in my work and strengthen them. Foreshadowing became easy. Setting up for jokes or plot points became easy. I didn't have to plan out my story in advance or write an outline, because the scenes themselves because a sort of living outline on their own. (Yes, despite all the foreshadowing and recurring thematic elements and secret hidden meanings sprinkled throughout this story, it actually never had an outline or a plan for any of that. It's all a natural byproduct of writing nonlinearly and rereading.)

Unpopular writing opinion time: You don't need to make a detailed outline.

Some people thrive on having an outline and planning out every detail before they sit down to write. But I know for a lot of us, we don't know how to write an outline or how to use it once we've written it. The idea of making one is daunting, and the advice that it's the only way to write or beat writer's block is demoralizing. So let me explain how I approach "outlining" which isn't really outlining at all.

I write in a Notion table, where every scene is a separate table entry and the scene is written in the page inside that entry. I do this because it makes writing nonlinearly VASTLY more intuitive and straightforward than writing in a single document. (If you're familiar with Notion, this probably makes perfect sense to you. If you're not, imagine something a little like a more contained Google Sheets, but every row has a title cell that opens into a unique Google Doc when you click on it. And it's not as slow and clunky as the Google suite lol) (Edit from the future: I answered an ask with more explanation on how I use Notion for non-linear writing here.) When I sit down to begin a new fic idea, I make a quick entry in the table for every scene I already know I'll want or need, with the entries titled with a couple words or a sentence that describes what will be in that scene so I'll remember it later. Basically, it's the most absolute bare-bones skeleton of what I vaguely know will probably happen in the story.

Then I start writing, wherever I want in the list. As I write, ideas for new scenes and new connections and themes will emerge over time, and I'll just slot them in between the original entries wherever they naturally fit, rearranging as necessary, so that I won't forget about them later when I'm ready to write them. As an example, my current long fic started with a list of roughly 35 scenes that I knew I wanted or needed, for a fic that will probably be around 100k words (which I didn't know at the time haha). As of this writing, it has expanded to 129 scenes. And since I write them directly in the page entries for the table, the fic is actually its own outline, without any additional effort on my part. As I said in the comment reply--a living outline!

This also made it easier to let go of the notion that I had to write something exactly right the first time. (People always say you should do this, but how many of us do? It's harder than it sounds! I didn't want to commit to editing later! I didn't want to reread my work! XD) I know I'm going to edit it naturally anyway, so I can feel okay giving myself permission to just write it approximately right and I can fix it later. And what I found from that was that sometimes what I believed was kind of meh when I wrote it was actually totally fine when I read it later! Sometimes the internal critic is actually wrong. 3. Marinating in the headspace of the story. For the first two months I worked on [fic], I did not consume any media other than [fandom the fic is in]. I didn't watch, read, or play anything else. Not even mobile games. (And there wasn't really much fan content for [fandom] to consume either. Still isn't, really. XD) This basically forced me to treat writing my story as my only source of entertainment, and kept me from getting distracted or inspired to write other ideas and abandon this one.

As an aside, I don't think this is a necessary step for writing, but if you really want to be productive in a short burst, I do highly recommend going on a media consumption hiatus. Not forever, obviously! Consuming media is a valuable tool for new inspiration, and reading other's work (both good and bad, as long as you think critically to identify the differences!) is an invaluable resource for improving your writing.

When I write, I usually lay down, close my eyes, and play the scene I'm interested in writing in my head. I even take a ten-minute nap now and then during this process. (I find being in a state of partial drowsiness, but not outright sleepiness, makes writing easier and better. Sleep helps the brain process and make connections!) Then I roll over to the laptop next to me and type up whatever I felt like worked for the scene. This may mean I write half a sentence at a time between intervals of closed-eye-time XD

People always say if you're stuck, you need to outline.

What they actually mean by that (whether they realize it or not) is that if you're stuck, you need to brainstorm. You need to marinate. You don't need to plan what you're doing, you just need to give yourself time to think about it!

What's another framing for brainstorming for your fic? Fantasizing about it! Planning is work, but fantasizing isn't.

You're already fantasizing about it, right? That's why you're writing it. Just direct that effort toward the scenes you're trying to write next! Close your eyes, lay back, and fantasize what the characters do and how they react.

And then quickly note down your inspirations so you don't forget, haha.

And if a scene is so boring to you that even fantasizing about it sucks--it's probably a bad scene.

If it's boring to write, it's going to be boring to read. Ask yourself why you wanted that scene. Is it even necessary? Can you cut it? Can you replace it with a different scene that serves the same purpose but approaches the problem from a different angle? If you can't remove the troublesome scene, what can you change about it that would make it interesting or exciting for you to write?

And I can't write sitting up to save my damn life. It's like my brain just stops working if I have to sit in a chair and stare at a computer screen. I need to be able to lie down, even if I don't use it! Talking walks and swinging in a hammock are also fantastic places to get scene ideas worked out, because the rhythmic motion also helps our brain process. It's just a little harder to work on a laptop in those scenarios. XD

In conclusion: Writing nonlinearly is an amazing tool for kicking writer's block to the curb. There's almost always some scene you'll want to write. If there isn't, you need to re-read or marinate.

Or you need to use the bathroom, eat something, or sleep. XD Seriously, if you're that stuck, assess your current physical condition. You might just be unable to focus because you're uncomfortable and you haven't realized it yet.

Anyway! I hope that was helpful, or at least interesting! XD Sorry again for the text wall. (I think this is the longest comment reply I've ever written!)

And same to you guys on tumblr--I hope this was helpful or at least interesting. XD Reblogs appreciated if so! (Maybe it'll help someone else!)

[alsofoundinpeas]

No One's Ever Had Me (Not Like You)

Summary: After JJ's insensitive remarks toward Spencer become too much to ignore, Y/N steps in to comfort him, igniting a friendship that rapidly grows into something more. Though Y/N falls for him first, Spencer soon finds himself falling even harder, realizing no one has ever cared for him the way she does—and he's ready to return it in full.

CONTENT WARNINGS: 18+ MDNI!! This fic is intended for adult audiences. Oral/Facesitting (f!receiving), dirty talk, praise kink (if you squint), masturbating (m!only), fingering (f!receiving), unprotected sex/PinV sex (wrap it before you tap it lovelies pls), c** swallowing (I don't know how else to put that HAHAHA), slight overstim (for both parties), slightly ooc!JJ (for the plot), one brief argument scene between the reader and JJ. Fluff and smut. Coworkers to friends to lovers.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!BAU!reader/afab!reader

A/N: I love a little "she fell first, he fell harder" trope, so I'm hoping you guys enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it. :) I am once again pleading my case that I am NOT a JJ hater!! I just saw a clip of this scene from season 3 and was inspired because I too have been in Spencer's shoes and honestly it hurts, so I wanted to change up the outcome a little bit. The title comes from Taylor Swift's "So High School" but the fic isn't necessarily based around the song if that makes sense. As always, please tell me what you think! If you enjoy it, please like, reblog, and share it with your friends. <3 Thank you and I love you all!! :)

Y/N had never been particularly fond of JJ. They worked well together, of course—professionalism came first—but there was something about JJ that rubbed her the wrong way. It felt so high school to say, but Y/N had always seen her as a bit of a "mean girl."

Y/N had joined the BAU a year after Spencer, and she’d witnessed firsthand the awkwardness when Spencer, shy and eager, had asked JJ to go to a football game with him as a date after Gideon had given him tickets. A sweet, innocent gesture, only for JJ to show up with Penelope in tow, turning the evening into a humiliating disaster for Spencer. That was just one of the many moments Y/N had found herself bristling at JJ's treatment of him. Despite JJ’s consistent indifference and occasional cruelty, Spencer’s feelings for her had never wavered. 

Until today.

Spencer sat across from JJ on the jet, eager to share his excitement about the book he was reading and its similarities with Pinocchio, his voice bubbling with enthusiasm as he rambled on. He barely noticed the lack of interest in JJ's eyes, her eyebrows raised in a near-sarcastic expression as she muttered a disinterested "Wow" in the middle of his sentence. She tossed the case file onto the table without a second glance and stood. "Interesting. Coffee?" she asked, her voice dripping with faux sweetness, her smile a brittle, saccharine mask. 

Spencer froze, his words dying in his throat as she swiftly walked away. He felt a sinking sensation in his chest—an awkward mix of humiliation and disappointment. Was he that annoying? His hands trembled slightly as he glanced down at the book in his lap, the pages now feeling heavier than they had moments ago. He cleared his throat, but the discomfort lingered, thick in the air.

Y/N had been watching the whole exchange from her spot on the couch, her eyes narrowing as she watched JJ throw her head back in a loud laugh at something Morgan had said about “escaping the robot” from across the jet. That was the breaking point. Y/N's stomach twisted with frustration. She was tired—so tired—of watching JJ repeatedly gut the sweet boy simply because he had a hopeless crush on her, one that JJ clearly saw as beneath her.  

Swinging her legs from where they were tucked underneath her, Y/N stood and made her way to the seat JJ had previously been occupying, sliding into it abruptly.

Spencer’s head jerked up as she quickly filled the seat, blinking hard as confusion washed over his features. “Oh! Uh, hey Y/N… was there something you needed?” he asked softly, his gaze dropping back to the table, hoping she wouldn’t notice the wounded look in his eyes.

“I was listening to your conversation earlier and wanted to ask if you would continue. Please.”

Spencer’s mouth parted in surprise, unsure if he’d heard her correctly. She… wanted to listen to him? He swallowed, his brows furrowing slightly as he hesitated before speaking. “You... you don’t have to do that just to make me feel better, you know.”

Y/N shook her head firmly, her hands coming together on the table as she leaned in slightly, her eyes never leaving his. “Spencer,” she said softly, her voice steady. “I’m not asking you to continue because I feel sorry for you. I’m asking because I actually want to hear what you have to say.” Her tone was gentle yet sincere, and there was no mistaking the genuine interest in her words.

Spencer’s heart raced as he stared at her, his mind struggling to catch up with the moment before he finally opened his mouth, stumbling over the words to continue his excited rant from earlier. Spencer felt something shift inside him with every hum of acknowledgment, nod, and occasional question or light joke. It hit him all at once—this was how she always spoke to him: fully engaged, genuinely curious. She didn’t see him as the genius or the outcast. She saw him as... just Spencer. A person. Not a curiosity. Not a burden. Just him.

And for the rest of the flight, Y/N encouraged Spencer to spill every single thought that came to mind, entranced by the sweet boy in front of her for the entire time.

It was late when they finally landed, the team worn out and eager to get home. With quick goodbyes and Hotch’s promise of a day off tomorrow, the group trickled out of the office, one by one. When Spencer was left alone in the bullpen, he let out a deep sigh, running a hand through his hair as he sat at his desk under the guise of needing to look for something before leaving. His thoughts kept drifting back to the interaction with Y/N on the jet. He couldn’t shake it. And for the life of him, he couldn’t understand why.

It wasn’t like they weren’t already friends—talking to her was nothing out of the ordinary. But something about their interaction today felt different. Maybe it was how quickly she’d stepped in when she saw he was hurt? Then again, the more Spencer thought about it, the more he realized that wasn’t all that unusual either. He’d often felt out of place—whether it was the team’s teasing that sometimes went too far, JJ’s backhanded compliments that left him more bewildered than flattered, or the officers who looked past him because of his age or appearance.

And every time, without fail, Y/N had been there. She was always the one picking up the pieces of his bruised confidence, offering him quiet support with nothing more than a kind word or a warm smile, never asking for anything in return.

“Spencer?” 

Spencer jumped, the unexpected voice pulling him out of his thoughts. He spun around in his seat, heart racing, to find Y/N standing there, her hands raised in a placating gesture. He’d thought she’d already left with the rest of the team, but apparently, he’d been wrong.  

“Whoa, take it easy—it's just me. Are you okay?” Y/N approached slowly, her expression softening with concern as Spencer took slow, deep breaths, trying to steady his racing heart.

“Uh, yeah! I-I’m fine,” Spencer stammered, wincing as his voice cracked. “I just… I thought everyone had already left.”

“Oh, sorry,” she said with a chuckle, flashing a sheepish grin. “I told Hotch I’d drop everything off in evidence before heading out, but I kind of took my time.” She shrugged, then glanced at him. “What about you? Why are you still here?”

Spencer hesitated, his brow furrowing as he thought about her question. What was he still doing here, other than overthinking a simple conversation on the jet? He cleared his throat and stood up from his desk. “I thought I left a certain book here, but... it turns out it’s actually at home.” The weak excuse was followed by a nervous laugh as Spencer fidgeted with his fingers, silently hoping she wouldn’t question him further. 

It seemed luck was on his side, as she nodded slowly—her disbelief clear, but deciding not to press. Instead, she offered a soft smile and tilted her head toward the elevator. “Well, if you're heading out now, would you like to walk with me to my car?” Y/N asked, her voice laced with a hint of hope. “I can give you a ride so you don’t have to take the metro so late.”

Spencer was momentarily surprised by the offer, but before he could overanalyze it, he found himself nodding. She’d offered him rides before, and he’d always turned her down, worried he’d be inconveniencing her or that she was just being polite. But tonight, after the grueling case, he felt too drained to talk himself out of it. Honestly, he wasn’t opposed to spending a little more time with her—just the two of them.

“Um… that would be really nice, actually. Thank you.” 

Y/N waved it off with a playful grin. “It’s really no big deal, Spencer. I honestly wish you'd take me up on it more often. I worry about you on those late trains, and I live just five minutes from you. It’d be nice to have some company on the way home.” 

They continued their light conversation the entire way to the parking garage, pausing only when they got to her car. Y/N fumbled with her keys, unlocking the doors quickly before they slid inside.

The first thing Spencer noticed was the sweet fragrance of her perfume, filling the small space around them. He hadn’t really noticed it before, but now he found himself trying hard not to breathe in too deeply, captivated by the scent and wanting more of it. The smell of her shampoo blended with the fragrance, intensifying as she turned her head to back out of her parking spot. Spencer hadn’t even realized the car had started until that moment.

The next thing he noticed was the sticker on her dash reading Amor Fati. A faint smile curled at his lips as he shifted his gaze to her. He watched her silently for a moment as she focused on the road.

“Lover of fate, huh?”

“Hm?” Y/N frowned in confusion, shooting him a quick sideways glance as she stopped at a red light. It took a moment before she realized what he was referring to. “Oh, yeah. What about it, doc?” She chuckled, her voice light and teasing.

Spencer hummed, a sly grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Oh, nothing… But, did you know that Friedrich Nietzsche built most of his philosophy around that phrase?”

They plunged into a lively conversation, exchanging thoughts on various philosophers and their personal interpretations of the phrase. Spencer was captivated. The only other person who had ever indulged him in such “nerdy” discussions was Penelope (mostly about Doctor Who, of course). It was oddly refreshing, but at the same time, it only added fuel to the fire of his overthinking.

What was it that kept him so hopelessly fixated on JJ? She could be a good friend at times—he wouldn’t deny that—but there were moments when he felt like nothing more than a charity case. Like that kid who clings to someone at school, oblivious to the fact that they don’t actually want to talk to them. She was beautiful, of course—anyone could see that. But they didn’t share much in common, and their hobbies barely aligned. So why did he always end up seeking her out, when there were so many other people he could spend time with?

After the incident on the jet, Spencer had made a decision. He was done pouring so much energy into the blonde liaison and instead would focus on building a genuine friendship with Y/N. Not just the casual co-worker relationship they had, but something real. Maybe that’s why her sudden attention on the jet had caught him off guard. Maybe it wasn’t a crush forming, but rather a deep-rooted loneliness, a subconscious desire for a true friend. That had to be it.

The drive to his apartment seemed to fly by, and as Spencer stepped out of the car, he was surprised by the sense of reluctance that settled over him. He murmured his thanks and goodnight to Y/N, offering a shy smile, his thoughts lingering on the brief but unexpected moment of connection.

"Hey, Spencer?" Y/N called just as he was about to close the door. He paused, and she went on, her tone genuine. "I meant what I said. If you ever want to skip the metro and ride with me instead, I’d love the company. Honestly, I enjoyed our drive so much more than the usual Top 40 hits on the radio."

Spencer’s smile grew, a hesitant nod accompanying the soft bite of his lower lip. This was the opportunity to build something real with her, and for once, he decided not to second-guess it. “I’d really like that, actually.”

Y/N’s heart skipped a beat, a blend of relief and excitement bubbling up inside her. A smile spread across her face as she let out a soft breath. "Great. I’m looking forward to it," she said, her voice warm. "Goodnight, Spencer. Enjoy your day off tomorrow."

The first week of Spencer’s newfound behavior had Y/N feeling… disoriented, for lack of a better term. It wasn’t a bad feeling, not at all. She was genuinely thrilled by the extra attention, but she couldn’t quite figure out what had caused the sudden shift in their dynamic.

Spencer had begun riding home with her after work, both of them quickly growing fond of the newfound companionship. Throughout the day, he found himself gravitating toward her desk more often, offering to help with paperwork or providing a second opinion when she second guessed something. As they spent more time together, their conversations became easier—what had started as awkward exchanges soon evolved into Spencer initiating talks, no longer waiting for her to take the lead.

The irritated huff that escaped JJ’s lips as she stormed past everyone and into her office after Spencer politely declined her offer to sit with her and sort through case files, made it clear—Y/N wasn’t the only one noticing the change.

The next notable shift came when the BAU was called to California for a case. As everyone filed onto the jet and took their usual seats, there was one exception: Spencer Reid. When Y/N settled onto the couch, she was greeted by a soft, uncertain voice.

“Can I join you?” Spencer asked, his fingers nervously tugging at the end of his cardigan sleeves as he blinked at her with those sweet, vulnerable brown eyes.

The entire team glanced up in surprise, caught off guard by Spencer's decision not to take his usual spot across from JJ. Y/N, both puzzled and pleased, quickly moved to make space, patting the seat beside her with an encouraging smile.

"Of course, Spence. Go right ahead."

Spencer let out a quiet sigh, his shoulders drooping in relief as he settled into the seat next to Y/N, the tension he hadn’t realized he was carrying easing from his body. Ignoring the gawking from the others, he leaned in slightly, feeling more at ease in her presence. As Y/N opened the case file, he glanced at her with a small smile, ready to dive into the work with her by his side.

Morgan chuckled from across the jet, looking at JJ with raised brows as she scoffed to herself. "What'd you do to piss off the kid?"

“I didn’t do anything! And when did she start calling him ‘Spence’?” JJ grumbled, her arms crossed defensively as she narrowed her eyes at the two of them.

“Whoa,” Morgan muttered, his smile dropping into a frown. “Didn’t realize I was hitting a sore spot. What’s it matter what she calls him, anyway?”

JJ stiffened, her words catching in her throat as she struggled to respond. Morgan was right—she wasn’t the only one who could give Spencer a nickname. But that was her name for him, and it stung a little more now, given the distance that had been growing between them.

"It’s nothing," JJ replied quickly, forcing a casual shrug. "I was just surprised, that’s all." But even as she spoke, she couldn’t shake the unease lingering in her chest, unsure why it bothered her so much.

The remainder of the flight was spent with the team discussing the case, Hotch assigning tasks for when they touched down. Once they had gone over everything they could, the conversation tapered off, and silence settled over the cabin. Each team member retreated into their own thoughts, but Y/N and Spencer remained deep in discussion, quietly exchanging ideas about the unsub.

As they leaned in to continue their conversation, they unknowingly inched closer, drawn together by the ease of their shared focus. And when Spencer felt Y/N's knee brush against his, he kept his leg still, savoring the contact in silence—his secret to keep.

It took Spencer just over two months to finally gather the courage to ask Y/N to hang out outside of work or their shared car rides—something he had started contributing to so he could get more comfortable with driving. She’d quickly climbed the ranks of people he favored and felt comfortable with, but the fear of rejection still held him back. He didn’t want to jeopardize the connection they’d built, especially when it felt so important to him.

Spencer’s fear dissolved when he asked Y/N to come over and watch a film he’d picked up at an antique shop. Her excited smile and enthusiastic "Duh, I'd love to!" made him realize that she’d likely been waiting for him to take the first step all along.

He was grateful for how Y/N allowed him to move at his own pace, understanding that his accelerated path through high school and college had made it difficult for him to form connections. She never rushed him, giving him the space to open up when he was ready and letting their relationship develop naturally.

Y/N arrived at Spencer’s apartment, her arms loaded with snacks and dressed in cozy clothes, her excitement palpable. She enjoyed their car rides, of course, but an hour together hardly seemed enough compared to the time she truly longed to spend with him.

Y/N had been captivated by Spencer for years, but the more time they spent together, the harder her heart beat for him—every smile, every laugh, every conversation only added to her growing feelings. She told herself she was content with just being friends, that having him in her life, even in the smallest way, was enough. But deep down, she knew the truth—her heart yearned for something more, something that seemed just out of reach.

"Y/N! Hi, welcome in!"

The door swung open to reveal Spencer, his grin wide with excitement as he motioned for her to step inside. The sight of him—beaming with an almost childlike enthusiasm—made her smile in return. His apartment matched her expectations in the best way possible: shelves overflowing with books and quirky knick-knacks, soft, ambient light spilling from lamps that cast a cozy glow across the room, and a desk strewn with an organized mess of case files and open journals. It was a perfect reflection of Spencer—intellectually chaotic, but with an undeniable charm and warmth.

Spencer's heart skipped a beat as she entered the living room, and for a moment, he lost track of everything around him. He had always seen her dressed up for work—polished, professional, a perfect image of control. But now, in her casual clothes, with her hair down and no hint of the usual makeup, she looked entirely different.

She was still stunning, but it was a softer kind of beauty, one that crept up on him and left him breathless before he even realized it. It was subtle, almost unnoticeable at first glance, but once he took her in, he couldn’t seem to pull his focus away. Spencer had always thought he knew Y/N, but this version of her… this version felt like a secret he wasn’t ready to discover yet.

"Where would you like these?" Y/N asked, lifting her arms up with the snacks.

The sound of her voice broke Spencer from his daze, and he quickly moved to help, grabbing a few items to set them down on the coffee table. "Oh, uh, you didn’t have to bring snacks," he stammered, his hands fumbling with the food as he awkwardly rearranged it. "I was just going to order takeout or something. You’re the guest," he added, his words tumbling out in a nervous rush. His mind was racing, still caught in the subtle sweetness of her perfume that lingered in the air as he leaned in to grab the bags, making it hard to focus.

Y/N shrugged, a small grin playing on her lips as she set the snacks down. "I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. And if you’re still craving takeout later, I won't stop you from ordering it. Sound good?"

He nodded, his nose twitching as he grinned, feeling his tension ease. It was just Y/N, he reminded himself. There was no reason to feel this flustered.

An hour later, with the movie playing and a bag of gummy bears between them, Spencer quickly realized he'd been wrong. He had plenty of reasons to feel flustered.

The film, which had subtitles, was riddled with translation errors. Each time a jumbled sentence appeared, Y/N would lean in close, her breath warm against his ear causing shivers up and down his spine as she whispered, "What does that one mean?" Her thigh brushed against his, neither of them making any effort to break the contact. Spencer felt an almost electric warmth spread through him from the slight touch, his body aching for more. Was he really that starved for affection?

That night seemed to crack something deep inside him, like a dam giving way to a flood of longing for touch.

Spencer—who had always been wary of physical contact—now found himself drawn to Y/N in ways he hadn’t anticipated. Every time they handed each other papers or worked on case files together, he’d make sure their fingers brushed. As he passed by her desk, he’d let his fingers trace along her shoulder blades, offering her a quiet smile that she always returned. After particularly exhausting days, he’d seek her out, leaning into her embrace, letting her arms offer him comfort and grounding. And during their hangouts, Spencer no longer hesitated to inch closer, letting his side press against hers, or allowing her to stretch her legs over his lap. The proximity felt natural, and he couldn’t help but crave it more.

It only got worse as time went on. He couldn't keep his hands off of her. It wasn't just casual touches anymore—it was almost as if every opportunity to be near her was a chance to close the distance between them. Y/N couldn't get enough of it. And the team? They definitely noticed. JJ, in particular, seemed to pick up on it right away.

JJ had attempted to confront Spencer about his growing closeness with Y/N before, but each time, he waved her off, insisting that he and Y/N had simply discovered they had more in common than he'd realized and that he just wanted to be her friend. JJ wasn’t convinced—not for a second. It was obvious to her that Spencer was falling for Y/N, and for reasons she couldn’t fully explain, it left a bad taste in her mouth. It wasn’t that she harbored romantic feelings for him, but she had grown accustomed to his attention. As much as she hated to admit it, she missed being the one to receive it.

The tension finally boiled over when the team was dispatched to a case in Oregon.

It had been six months since the incident on the jet, and Y/N and Spencer had become almost inseparable. Garcia and Morgan, delighted by their closeness, often teased them and playfully begged them to just admit they were dating—though both vehemently insisted that their relationship was purely platonic. Rossi and Emily often exchanged knowing looks on the jet, with Emily even going so far as to snap a picture of Y/N and Spencer sleeping on the couch after a case—a cute picture featuring Spencer’s head resting on Y/N’s and her face tucked into his shoulder as they peacefully dozed together. Even Hotch seemed to approve, having reviewed the Bureau’s internal fraternization policies just in case Strauss raised an issue. The only person who didn’t seem thrilled about it was JJ.

Two days in Oregon, and the team was already facing an uphill battle. They’d been working non-stop to build a profile for the unsub, but so far, nothing had gone right. There were no witnesses who could provide a description, a local officer had already compromised key evidence from the first crime scene, and the victims seemed to have no clear link to one another. Frustration was mounting for everyone, but for JJ it was mounting for an entirely separate reason.

Spencer had been managing his frustration through subtle touches with Y/N—brief brushes of his hand against her lower back as he passed, pressing his head into her shoulder with a frustrated groan after combing through their limited information for hours... But the moment that pushed JJ to her breaking point was when Spencer, noticing an officer staring at Y/N, pulled her possessively into him, his hand firmly gripping her waist until that officer left the room.

"Y/N?"

JJ's voice was tight as she stepped into the conference room the local officers had set up for the BAU to use during their case, spotting Y/N standing in front of the pinned-up map of the area as she studied the locations where the victims had been found. Spencer had just left, going to start more coffee for them since they were running low. The rest of the team was out in the field, reinvestigating the crime scenes for anything that may have been missed initially.

Y/N looked up, her brow furrowing as JJ closed the door. They weren’t close on a personal level, and Y/N couldn’t think of any reason, related to the case or otherwise, for JJ to want to speak with her alone.

"...Yes?"

JJ lingered near the end of the table, her arms crossed across her chest as she leveled Y/N with a look that immediately had her on edge. "I’m not trying to pry, but as his best friend, I have to ask… what’s going on between you and Spencer?" Her face was twisted in a scowl, her head tilting as she waited for a response.

Y/N's eyebrows nearly shot up into her hairline at that, a scoffed laugh leaving her lips before she could stop it. His best friend. Was she serious?

"Excuse me?"

"What's going on with you and Spencer?" JJ repeated, her voice deliberate. "Everyone’s noticed how he’s been acting—the constant touching, for one, is a bit much, don’t you think? He never wants to hang out with me anymore. It’s like he's all about you now. So, are you two seeing each other or what?"

Y/N turned to face JJ fully, her lips tightening into a thin line as she took a steadying breath. Her audacity was astounding, truly. The last thing she wanted today was to argue with this fucking—

"That's hilarious, Jennifer. Really," Y/N chuckled lowly, shaking her head. "Have you ever considered that maybe—just maybe—Spencer is an adult who can make his own decisions? I’m not the reason he doesn't want to spend time with you."

JJ stiffened at the mention of her name, scoffing in response. "Oh, clearly you have something to do with it. Before you started driving him home, he followed me around like a lost puppy. Now he barely even wants to be around me!"

That struck a nerve in Y/N, like a live wire finally sparked to life. A lost puppy? Was that truly how little she thought of him? Y/N's head tilted, her voice dropping to a low, dangerous tone as she spoke again.

"Don't you ever talk about Spencer like that again. He's not your fucking pet, Jennifer!"

Her voice was menacing as she stepped forward, grim satisfaction coursing through her as JJ stumbled backward.

"Spencer is a brilliant, capable man who’s never deserved the way you or anyone else have made him feel less than that. We’re not dating. But if we were, I wouldn’t be ashamed of him. Unlike you, who found the idea of a man like him adoring you repulsive instead of seeing it for the gift it was. Spencer Reid is a fucking treasure, and it’s entirely your fault you never realized how lucky you were to have his attention."

Y/N's face was flushed red with anger, her chest heaving as she seethed.

"So again, I have nothing to do with him not wanting to spend time with you anymore. Maybe he finally realized that you're just not as great of a person as you pretend to be."

Rather than waiting for the teary-eyed, speechless blonde to reply, Y/N grabbed her things and stormed out, heading out to take an early lunch. But as she swung the door open, she was met with Spencer standing right there, and before she could react, she collided with his chest. His hands immediately flew to her waist, steadying her as she looked up sheepishly.

"Shit! I’m sorry, Spence," Y/N muttered, still fuming from her conversation with JJ. Her face turned even redder when she realized he might have heard some of it, but she didn’t regret a word of what she’d said.

He hadn't just heard some of it... He'd heard all of it. When he’d left earlier, he’d turned back, intending to ask if she wanted to take a break from the map. Instead, he had been met with the sight of JJ closing the door, and he curiously (shamefully) pressed up against it to know what was going on.

Admittedly, it stung to hear JJ talk about him like that, even though he already knew she'd taken advantage of his past crush on her. But Y/N's words and how she defended him hit him harder than expected. It became clear in that instant—no one had ever been there for him the way she always had been, and somewhere along the way, he'd fallen deeply in love with her.

"Hey, hey, it’s alright," Spencer said quietly, his hands smoothing over her waist before resting gently on her shoulders. "Go take your lunch. You’ve earned a break. I’ll keep working on the geographical profile until you return."

Y/N offered a weary but grateful smile before walking away, leaving Spencer alone to process the revelation weighing on him.

That night, Spencer paced his hotel room, caught between waiting until they were home to tell Y/N how he felt or just saying it now. He felt like an idiot for not recognizing it sooner, for convincing himself his feelings for her were purely platonic. But now that he knew, it consumed him. He wanted to shout it to the heavens, to tell the world he was in love with her.

Spencer knew what he had to do. He realized that confessing his feelings in the middle of a case wasn’t ideal, but the thought of waiting any longer to let her know how much she meant to him was unbearable. That’s why, before he could talk himself out of it, he found himself standing outside her door at midnight, knocking softly.

"Spence? You okay?"

Her sleepy voice tugged at his heart as she opened the door, rubbing her eyes and letting out a soft yawn. She smiled faintly, gesturing for him to come in. The room was cloaked in darkness, but the moonlight spilling through the curtains illuminated the crumpled sheets, evidence of her restless sleep.

His heart hammered in his chest as he breathed in unsteadily, lowering himself onto the edge of her bed. She crawled back to the middle, flicking on the bedside lamp, the soft light casting a warm glow between them. His courage started to falter, but the gentle concern in her eyes anchored him. He remembered why he was here—because with her, he felt safe enough to face this, no matter how vulnerable he felt.

"Y/N, I—" Spencer began, his voice catching for a moment, but he continued anyway. "I heard what happened with JJ earlier, and it made me realize something I should’ve recognized a long time ago. I was so caught up in denial that it didn’t hit me until now. And I’m so sorry for that…"

Oh, fuck. He was starting to ramble. This isn't how he wanted this to go at all—

"Y/N... I'm in love with you. I am so, so in love with you that it aches. You are, without a doubt, the most beautiful person I’ve ever known. And it’s not just the way you look, though I could spend hours talking about how stunning you are. It’s who you are, the goodness that radiates from you. You make me want to be better, to wake up every day and try to be at least half the person you are. You care for everyone around you like it’s your purpose, and I want to be the one who takes care of you for once because you truly deserve that. I’ve never felt anything like this, and if you don’t feel the same way, that’s okay. But I just—I needed you to know."

Y/N’s jaw dropped as Spencer’s confession filled the air, her eyes welling with tears as the words she had longed for spilled from him. She moved swiftly, sitting up from the pillows and crawling toward him, a tear dripping down her cheek as she rested her hands on his shoulders.

"I love you too, Spencer Reid," she breathed, her voice trembling with sincerity. "I love you with everything I am."

Spencer’s lungs burned as he released a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. He returned her watery smile, his heart overflowing with love for the woman before him. Carefully, he cupped her face, his thumb following the line of her cheeks, his eyes filled with a quiet mix of wonder and adoration.

“Can I kiss you? Please?”

Her lips were on his the second he uttered the last syllable.

The kiss was both gentle and intense, their lips meeting with a deliberate slowness as if savoring every moment of crossing the line from friendship into something more. There was a hunger beneath the tenderness, an unspoken yearning finally being released. Their lips parted for only a second, allowing them to suck in a quick breath before they were back on each other. Each kiss was a quiet revelation, better than they had ever dreamed.

What started as an innocent declaration of their feelings for each other quickly evolved into something more ravenous as Spencer’s tongue prodded at the seam of her lips. The soft exhale Y/N released as their tongues brushed together had Spencer groaning, one of his hands sliding to cradle the back of her head as he savored the taste of her and the feeling of her lips against his. His other hand gingerly slid down her body, settling on her hip as he leaned forward, guiding her to rest against the pillows.

Y/N’s thighs parted eagerly to make room for him between them, her hands lacing through his hair as she tugged him impossibly closer. His elbows dug into the mattress beside her body as he hovered above her, swallowing the moan that slipped from her lips when their hips pressed together. He chased her lips when she tipped her head back, kissing her with an intensity that made her dizzy and had her whining into his mouth.

"I-I want— Spence, please—"

Y/N pleaded as his lips trailed down the side of her neck to suck a mark into her collarbone, though she wasn't even sure what she was begging for. She just knew she needed him. Her body felt like it was aflame, ignited by the spark that was Spencer's tongue soothing the possessive bruise now blooming across her skin. She needed him so desperately that her mind became a blur, consumed by an endless craving, unable to focus on anything but the overwhelming desire for more—more of him, more of this, more of everything he offered.

The thin fabric of their pajamas did little to conceal the feeling of his stiff cock grinding against her in subtle rocks of his hips as his hands began to roam her body, only adding to the overwhelming need she felt coursing through her. Spencer hushed her with a gentle peck, his lips lingering against hers for a brief, sweet moment before he moved to kiss her nose, her cheeks, and finally her forehead. With each gentle kiss, she couldn't help but giggle softly, her laughter melting into the space between them.

"I know, pretty girl. You're already so worked up and all I've done is kiss you," he cooed, the words taking her by surprise. He wasn't wrong. A wet patch had started seeping through the cotton of her pants, something his fingers had taken an interest in as he began to lightly skim up and down her clit with his knuckles over the damp fabric. "No one ever takes care of you, do they, baby? Let me be the one to take care of you, Y/N. Please?" He paused, gently lifting her chin so he could meet her gaze.

Spencer’s words quieted the storm raging inside her, and she took a deep breath, her body finally relaxing. She couldn’t recall the last time she’d felt such a strong desire to let go, to stop carrying the weight of everything alone. To finally surrender and let someone take care of her. So she did exactly that.

"Yes. God, yes. Please, Spencer," Y/N whispered, her eyes searching his, full of need and trust.

It was as if a switch flipped the moment Spencer got the confirmation he needed.

His lips were back on hers in an instant, devouring her as though she'd melt away if he stopped touching her for even a second. He rolled them over, breaking the kiss to glide his hands underneath the rumpled t-shirt Y/N had on for bed and lifting it over her head in one swift motion. Ignoring her soft squeal of surprise, he brought his hands down to her hips, massaging the skin there before sliding his hands under the waistband of her pajama pants to grip her ass.

"Look at you… You're nothing short of incredible. Absolutely breathtaking," Spencer murmured, staring up at her in awe. The soft brown of his eyes had faded, overtaken by the dark void of his dilated pupils, as if a veil had been drawn across them. "I can't even begin to express how lucky I am to have you... how beautiful you are."

Y/N’s cheeks flushed under his gaze, her teeth gently catching her lower lip as she placed her hands beside his head for support. She shivered as her nipples brushed against the fabric of his shirt, hardened by the cool air of the hotel room and the desire she felt coursing through her. She answered with a hum and ducked her head shyly, mouthing at the sensitive skin underneath his jaw as she wriggled impatiently in his hold.

Spencer chuckled breathlessly, squeezing her ass again before retracting his hands. His fingers danced along the waistband of her pants teasingly before he began to tug them down, dragging her panties with them. His heart raced as she wiggled out of them, hammering against his chest with a rhythm that felt almost deafening. He couldn’t comprehend what he’d done to deserve someone like her, but he would spend a lifetime making sure she knew just how precious she was to him.

"It's your turn to strip," Y/N mumbled as she sat up, straddling his waist as her hands found their way under his shirt. "I feel so... exposed."

Spencer’s brows quirked in amusement, a quiet laugh slipping out before he could stop it as she shoved the shirt up and over his head. She slithered down his body, grinning up at him before placing a kiss on his hip bone. His pants soon joined the growing pile of clothes on the ground, followed shortly after by his boxers.

"There. Is that better, sweetheart?" Spencer teased, but the words went completely unheard as she gawked at him.

Y/N kneeled between his spread legs, her hands planted firmly on his thighs as she took in the sight of him. He lay before her like something straight out of her most vivid dreams, more stunning than she’d ever imagined. He was effortlessly handsome—his hair tousled, lips slightly swollen from their kisses, and freckles and scars scattered across his shoulders and chest like a map of his past. His muscles were lean and toned, and the sparse hair trailing down beneath his belly button was far more enticing than it should've been. His cock was as pretty as he was, the flushed head of his more than impressive arousal matching the pink of his cheeks.

She couldn’t tear her eyes away.

"C'mere. I'm supposed to be taking care of you," Spencer grinned, motioning for Y/N to crawl back over him.

Instead of letting her settle with her thighs around his hips like she had previously been, he tugged insistently, her brows furrowing in confusion as she wobbled above him.

"Spencer, what—"

"Get up here," Spencer crooned, finally managing to maneuver her forward so her pussy hovered over his mouth. "And sit down."

Y/N's jaw dropped, her hands flying out to catch herself as she gripped the headboard. She was taken aback, utterly speechless. Here she was, being manhandled by Spencer Reid. The same quiet, awkward genius who rambled endlessly about statistics and couldn’t sit still for more than a minute was man-handling her and demanding she sit on his face. Was she dreaming?

"Are you— are you sure?" Y/N squeaked, staring down at him with wide eyes. "You really don't have to—"

Spencer turned his head so he could pepper open-mouthed kisses up and down her inner thigh, coaxing a soft moan from her as his warm breath fanned across her soaked folds.

"Stop all that worrying, pretty girl. I told you I'd take care of you—let me keep my word."

Before she could protest, Spencer gripped her hips, pulling her down at the same time he tilted his head up to lap his tongue over her core. Any hesitation Y/N had left evaporated from her body as a guttural moan ripped its way from her throat, her eyes fluttering shut as Spencer dragged his tongue over her clit. His movements were languid but hungry as he reveled in the taste of her, relishing her essence as though it was the very thing he needed to fuel his existence.

The air was filled with a mixture of moans and the slick sound of Spencer's mouth working between her legs, only amplifying the intense pleasure swimming through her body. Once Spencer was sure Y/N would stay put, he let one of his hands fall away from her hips, tracing it down his body until it wrapped around his cock. The breathy sounds she was letting out had him painfully hard, his thumb spreading the bead of precum spilling from the tip down the length of him as he began to pump himself.

"Oh, fuck—" Y/N whined as she forced her eyes open, turning to look over her shoulder at the sound of Spencer touching himself. The sight had her thighs trembling, a low groan rumbling in her throat as she turned her gaze down to look at him underneath her.

His eyes were squeezed shut, his brows pinched together in pleasure as his hand began to move faster. It was downright sinful. She'd never seen anything more beautiful.

Spencer alternated between fucking his tongue into her and sucking gently at her clit, the combination hurtling her toward her orgasm at a speed she never thought was possible. Y/N's hips rocked against his face, frantic whimpers slipping from her lips as her face began to scrunch in pleasure. The needy moans he was letting out against her skin pushed her over the edge as a sharp gasp broke free into the air, followed by a loud cry as her hands dropped from the headboard to tangle into his hair while she came.

Spencer whimpered as he let go of himself, instead using his hands to anchor her down while he gently worked her through her climax. He pressed a small kiss to her clit before she squirmed away, falling onto the bed beside him as her chest heaved. A look of adoration lingered on his face as he stroked her side and hair, pressing his lips to her forehead while she caught her breath.

Y/N flashed a small grin, rolling her eyes at his proud expression. A comforting heaviness settled in her limbs, pulling her deeper into the bed as she released a soft sigh. It took her a few moments to push herself up on her elbow, shifting to face him instead of lying flat on her back.

"How am I ever supposed to get anything done again now that I know you can do that?" Y/N murmured with a hint of exasperation, tilting her head to nuzzle her nose against his.

Spencer’s breath hitched as she draped her leg across his waist, hissing quietly as the head of his cock brushed against her warmth. He hummed, feigning thought before shrugging with a playful grin. "Could be a reward for a job well done," he teased, brushing a lingering kiss across her lips as his hand rubbed up and down her thigh.

"Yeah?" Y/N's hips began to slowly rock back and forth, the friction from his cock pressing between her folds making her head spin. "Well, can I reward you for a job well done then?"

Spencer's fingers flexed against her thigh, a low noise escaping him as he fought to keep his eyes on hers.

It made sense to him now why sailors would plummet into icy waters at the sound of a siren's call. If that call was anything as alluring as the sound of her voice, he'd happily do the same. She could demand the most heinous things of him right now and he'd do them simply because she asked.

But tonight was about her.

So instead of caving and begging for her touch, he shook his head, his lips quirking up at the pout forming on her lips. "As much as I would love to take you up on that offer, I'm supposed to be taking care of you, sweetheart. Not the other way around."

"Okay... so then take care of me by fucking me. Please?"

Spencer's resolve broke at her words. How could he possibly deny her? He'd be an absolute fool not to give her whatever her heart wished for.

His lips met hers in a fervent kiss as he moved to hover over her once more. Two of his fingers found her soaked pussy and sank inside of her with little resistance, a smug grin finding its way to his face as she gasped loudly into his mouth. He broke the kiss, trailing his lips along her jaw before he whispered into her ear.

"Are you sure that's what you want?"

Y/N bucked her hips up into his touch, writhing underneath him as she nodded frantically. There wasn't a thing in this world that she wanted more. "Yes, Spence, please. Please fuck me. I need it—"

Spencer groaned, latching his lips onto the side of her neck as he inhaled sharply through his nose before he sat back on his heels. His fingers slipped out of her, her eyes widening as he brought the digits to his mouth and sucked them clean with a satisfied hum.

"Flip over."

Y/N followed his command without hesitation, the rush of anticipation making her feel almost detached, as though she were on autopilot, waiting to see what he would do next. Her breath caught in her throat as his lips pressed a gentle kiss to her shoulder before he reached for a pillow, tucking it underneath her hips to prop her up. A low whine emitted from her chest as she felt the flushed head of his arousal bump against her entrance, her hips canting back in an attempt to get him to push forward as he leaned forward, his chest brushing her back as he planted his hands into the mattress beside her.

"Do you want it like this, sweetheart? No condom? Because I can go find one..." Spencer murmured into her ear, his breathing labored as he teased her opening.

"Please— Wanna feel you, Spence," She whined into the pillow, arching her hips into his touch, though he remained just out of reach.

Spencer's eyes squeezed shut as a pang of arousal shot through him, taking a shuddering breath to mentally prepare himself not to blow his load before he even fucked her. With a kiss to the back of her head, Spencer began to press forward, easing into her inch by inch.

Y/N's mouth gaped open against the pillow she'd tugged underneath her head in a silent moan, the sensation of him finally filling her more intense than she'd expected. Her fingers gripped the sheets as he bottomed out, a pitiful whimper slipping free as she wiggled her hips in an attempt to adjust to the feeling. Her walls clenched around him instinctively as she adjusted, causing a broken moan to fall from his lips as his head rested against her shoulder, his breath puffing across her skin in warm bursts.

His right arm kept him braced above her while his left arm made its way under her chest, pulling her close as his hand began to grope at her breasts. His fingertips pinched one of her nipples, reveling in the soft moan she let out. "Are you ready for me to move, pretty girl?" He breathed, peppering kisses along the side of her face as he waited for her to relax.

At her nod, Spencer began to move, his thrusts slow but powerful as he repeatedly drove into her. He shifted up onto his knees, pulling her hips back into his languid thrusts as she moaned beneath him. The angle allowed him to brush her G-spot with every stroke, causing her toes to curl with each pang of pleasure that wracked her body. His hands squeezed the flesh of her ass, a low whine bubbling in his throat as he took in the sight of his cock sliding in and out of her.

It was downright erotic, the sight of her arousal coating the wiry curls at the base of him driving him insane. She was so fucking wet for him. The knowledge that he was making her feel this good made his head spin. He couldn't keep it to himself anymore. He needed to show her how deeply this was affecting him, to make her understand the intensity of the way she made him feel.

Everyone knew Spencer liked to run his mouth. It wasn't a surprise that this remained true during sex. What surprised Y/N, however, was how absolutely filthy of a mouth the man had. Spencer, the same Spencer who had barely uttered a curse in all the years she'd known him, was now stringing together words that would make even the most foul-mouthed person blush.

His pace increased with each word he murmured, small "ah, ah, ah's" spilling from her lips as he began to really pound into her.

"Does that feel good? Huh? Finally being taken care of the way you deserve?"

"Fuck— look at you, baby. Taking my cock so well. Do you like that? You like feeling me stretch you open?"

"Such a perfect pussy, sweetheart. So fucking good for me. So tight. My beautiful girl."

Every vulgar word he breathed into the space between them had her mind reeling, her body teetering on the edge of release as her walls fluttered around him. Desperate moans began to spill from her as she took everything he had to offer, her teeth digging into her lower lip to try to stifle the noises in an attempt not to wake everyone on that floor of the hotel. Spencer's gaze was locked on the way her ass rippled with each thrust, a look of pure ecstasy on his face as his brows pinched together and his mouth hung open.

"S-Spence— I'm so close—" Y/N whimpered, burying her face into the pillow beneath her as she moaned helplessly.

He dragged one of his hands away from where it was squeezing her hip, shoving it between her hips and the pillow propping her up as he began to stroke her clit in time with his thrusts. "Let go, sweet girl. Cum around my cock. Show me how good I make you feel."

She cried out at that, thrashing underneath him as the tension coiling in her lower belly finally snapped. Spencer's hips stuttered, a guttural moan wrenching its way from his throat as she squeezed around him, her legs trembling as one of the most powerful orgasms she'd ever experienced washed over her in waves.

"God— fuck, I'm about to cum," Spencer grunted, his eyes squeezing shut briefly as he swallowed hard, his chest heaving with exertion as he fucked her through it. "Where do you want it, pretty girl?"

"Wanna taste you... Spence, please—" Y/N slurred beneath him, weakly pushing up on her elbows to turn and look at him over her shoulder. Her bottom lip was swollen and lightly bruised from how hard she'd been biting at it, and her eyes were watery with unshed tears as the pleasure began to overwhelm her.

The sight of her looking so ruined almost had him spilling inside of her, and with a muffled curse he pulled out of her, fisting his cock as she rolled onto her back and stuck her tongue out patiently. He shuffled up her body, bracing himself with one hand against the headboard as he gazed down at her reverently. The amusement he felt from the brief feeling of deja vu from having her in a similar position earlier that night was short-lived as his head tipped back, a strained whimper filling the air as her tongue brushed against the head of his cock.

It only took a few pumps for him to cum, his eyes rolling back into his head when she sat up to take him further into her mouth as rope after rope of his essence flooded her throat. Y/N sucked gently, working him through his orgasm until his hips were jerking and he was whining, pulling off of his softening cock with a slick 'pop'. He crumpled onto the bed next to her, his heart pounding almost painfully against his ribcage as he struggled to catch his breath.

Spencer wrapped her tightly in his arms, his lips brushing against the top of her head with soft, repeated kisses. Between each tender touch, he murmured how incredible she made him feel, how he couldn’t believe he was lucky enough to share this life with her, let alone love her the way he did. Y/N whispered back, her voice soft but full of conviction, telling him how deeply she cherished him and how every part of her was filled with love for him.

Her fingers idly traced patterns across the flushed skin of his chest until he caught her hand, pressing tender kisses to her knuckles before quietly slipping out of bed. She groaned petulantly as he pulled her to her feet, ushering her towards the bathroom with a pat to her butt and a mumbled but passionate lecture on the timeframe after sex in which she needed to pee to avoid getting a UTI. Even though she knew he was right, she still rolled her eyes as she trudged into the bathroom. She decided to brush her teeth while she was there as well, giggling to herself at the thought of kissing Spencer with the taste of him still in her mouth.

When she stepped out, Spencer had changed the sheets and set a bottle of water on the nightstand, flashing a drowsy grin as she slipped into bed next to him and turned the lamp out. "What's all this about?" she teased, her smile breaking into a yawn.

"I'm taking care of you, just like I said I would."

It didn’t take long for exhaustion to settle in, both of them murmuring good nights between soft kisses. As they drifted off together, Y/N felt certain he would be taking care of her for the rest of his life—and she was just as sure that she would do the same for him.

Continued A/N's: Happy (late) start to December!! I really hope you guys enjoy this :') I plan on doing a little something (maybe, possibly ;) ) for Christmas, so stay tuned for updates on what that little something may be. Also, a loving reminder that my requests are open! :) <3 K

REMINDER: I do NOT give permission for my work to be re-uploaded to any other platforms (c.ai, Tiktok, ao3, etc.) under any circumstances. If you'd like to translate my work, then please ask me before doing so. I know it sounds whiny, but I (as well as many other fanfic writers) spend so much time on these and it's genuinely not okay to take credit for work that isn't yours. It's insulting and completely unnecessary. If I do see my work uploaded anywhere without explicit permission, I WILL say something.

[celaenaeiln]

Is Dick's tendency for self-destructive habits really as bad as some fics make it out to be?

oh interesting!! In some way, yes actually.

Batman (2016) Issue #689

Dick and Alfred!! The duo make me so happy <33

But anyway, it's weird that someone who's so effusive with his affection so often and readily "deflects a moment of genuine emotion." Which is also one of the reasons why Dick Grayson as a character is so fascinating because he's never what people expect him to be. He's like a puzzle box where every time you think you solved, you just opened yourself up to a hard, even more complex one wherein the process repeats on an endless cycle.

He's incredibly self-destructive in the way he drive a burning car off a bridge and he'll know it's on fire, he knows where he's going, but he'll do it anyway because the car has a bomb and it's safer with him than the civilians behind him.

You know what? I just realized he deflects intimate conversations because he wants to keep the focus on the other person. Since he was Robin, Dick has been purposefully neglecting his feelings in order to take care of Bruce's. Right after his parents died, he bottled up his sadness and sorrow because he was worried that Bruce would blame himself and he didn't want Bruce to do that.

It's always been "Tell me what's wrong, Bruce." He's been so busy raising his guardian, his friends, his siblings, his teammates, that Dick has sunk into the role of a performer - the spotlight's on him but the audience is the focus.

I didn't realize until writing this ask but self-destruction is just such a normal thing with him that it's become a part of his personality. In fics it's very obvious when he's being self-destructive or neglecting himself or etc because he's very aware of it but Dick in canon has just made it his thing. It's actually the Titans that realize this and yank him out of it because Dick has no idea what he does to himself.

The New Teen Titans (1980) Issue #28

The New Teen Titans (1980) Issue #28

He's not self-destructive in a way that he's conscious of it but his habits and his lifestyle don't really give him a choice. He literally works himself sick.

The Titans (1999) Issue #9

"Maybe it's too much. Dick --have you considered that? You're working Bludhaven, even joining their force, you still clearly intend to come here to Gotham every time he calls you -- working so hard you're making yourself sick,"

"No. It's not the newness that's the problem."

People are literally telling him to calm down and he's like 'No! I'm perfectly okay. This is fine, let's continue.'

And this isn't even going into when Blockbuster blew up his life and Dick kinda lost himself to hunt him down and make him pay. People understand that Desmond burnt down the circus but Dick was still connected to the people in that circus, like he used his contacts there to sometimes inquire about things going on Bludhaven. The people at the circus raised him along with his parents so killing them was like killing Dick's aunts and uncles and friends and childhood. What happened then and after the SA was catastrophic. To Dick self-destruction has just become a part of him because he aims for perfection in every aspect of his life.

Like Donna said, "He works with the Titans, on his own, goes to school, and then he works alongside Batman..." and so on. Usually people struggle to maintain even one area of their life like just school or family but Dick's juggling, his work, his family, his friends, his relationship, his teams, and is still on call for Justice League incidents.

Titans (2003) Issue #6

He literally dropped everything to come over and break up the Titans (OF WHICH HE IS NOT EVEN A PART OF RIGHT NOW BECAUSE HE'S IN THE MIDDLE OF DEALING WITH THE OUTSIDERS) and the Justice League full on fighting.

He's not self-destructive in the way he doesn't want to get out of bed or that he isn't clean, it's just that Dick Grayson is a machine. He's got ice in his veins and he just powers through everything. Everything he does has to be top notch, so sleep and social life and happiness can say goodbye because he's too busy for that. This is why the Titans are so important to him and for him because they realize this toxic trait of his and do their absolute best to yank him out of this bad habit because Dick certainly can't stop.

So self-destruction has become part of his personality but unlike in fics, it's conducive self-destruction. It comes from his refusal to feel any emotion that isn't for others because Big Brother Dick Grayson and Best Friend Dick Grayson are always there for everyone but the second he's asked to help himself or someone tries to help him, he flakes. He's the best at helping others and being there for them but he's allergic to getting help or talking about himself.

[wisteria-lodge]

Gender and Harry Potter is such a hydra that just keeps revealing more heads the more you try and chop through it. Case in point: Today I just realized Harry Potter might've been originally intended as a book for boys, which if it was *wow*, way to miss the mark Joanne. Do you think it was actually intended for a male audience? To me it kinda makes sense if it was because of the way most women and girls are portrayed in it.

Bloomsbury Publishing definitely requested that JK Rowling publish with her (gender neutral) initials instead of 'Joanne Rowling' because they were concerned boys would not buy a book with a woman's name on the cover.

My guess is that her British publishers slotted it more firmly under 'boy' than her American publishers did. Harry Potter is 100% a school story, a super established British children's book genre. Historically, there are boy school stories (set in all-male posh public schools) and girl school stories (set in all-female posh public schools.) Hogwarts is of course co-ed, but that fact that it comes out of a literary tradition in which all the characters are the same gender... might help explain why in-universe gender politics seem remarkably absent from the wizarding world.

It actually kind of bugs me, when a canon-compliant fic makes a big deal about male-only inheritance or something, because that's just not something we see. There's one line about "Black family tradition" saying that the house goes to the next oldest guy, but since Dumbledore is worried that *Bellatrix* is about to inherit, it clearly isn't that important.

JKR has made a fantasy society where gender doesn't really matter - Augusta Longbottom and Walburga Black are clearly the powerful matriarchs of their respective families, Maxime and McGonagall are headmistresses, no problem. There isn't the boys quidditch team vs girl's quidditch team, the locker rooms and the prefects bathroom seem to be co-ed, "robes" are gender neutral, there isn't a sense that a specific discipline or type of magic is gendered (we see both male and female Transfiguration, Care of Magical creatures, and Defense Against the Dark arts professors...) There is kind of a sense that the boys are supposed to ask the girls to the yule ball... but multiple girls still ask out Harry. Gender comes up a lot in these books yes, but not so much in the actual worldbuilding. We have gendered bathrooms and dorms, and the rule that the girls can go into the boy's dormitory, but not vice-versa. Ron considers lace a girly fabric. Of the top of my head, that's all of the "gendered" rules I can think of.

But, since the main character is a boy, it makes sense that her British publishers would slot it more into the category of "school story (boy)" and market accordingly. I think it's extremely likely that she was asked to lean more heavily into quidditch, an aspect of the world building that JKR is clearly not interested in. She's said multiple times that she dislikes writing quidditch games - which is why she throws in comedy with the commentary, or makes some magical thing go down, or finds ways to cancel quidditch entirely. The mechanics and tension of the game *itself* are not interesting to her. I think it's also possible this is a reason for Hermione's relatively late intro into the friend group during Book 1? Harry can be friends with a girl, but first we need to establish that Ron is his *best* friend.

But then the books hit America, and the whole "school story" thing didn't read as "boy" as much as it just read "British." There was a sense in American advertising, especially in the 90s, that girl's products were for girls, but boy's products were for everyone. Scholastic Publishing seemed less interested in gendering the book, and more interested in making sure it didn't come off as too high-brow to American children - so we get the name change from "Philosopher's Stone" to "Sorcerer's Stone," things like that.

But then right before the publication of Book 4 the series exploded, and JKR could have just self-published the thing if her publishers didn't behave. So I think that you can see the fingerprints of that marketing push on Book 1, which grandfathered in a number of worldbuilding choices that JKR maybe wouldn't have made later. But pretty quickly it just became JKR doing her thing.

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Who is My Heart Waiting for? | Park Jimin One Shot | Teaser

Summary: Getting closer to one of the staff on tour didn't seem like such a bad idea...that is until Jimin realizes that his feelings for her are more than just platonic. Pairing: Rockstar!Jimin pov x Staff f!reader (Strings is her nickname) Warnings: Explicit language but that's about it at this point (I'll add more when I post the full version) a/n: This is my first Jimin fic and my first fic that's written from the idol's pov so hopefully you guys will enjoy the switch up this time. Not sure when I'll post it but I wanted to see if I have an audience for it since I mostly just write for Jungkook 😅 p.s. It's not a surprise that this is based on the lyrics from 'Who' by Jimin because holy shit that song is incredible so I had to write something about it. Hopefully you guys'll like it 🤞🏼

"Come on loser let's go! I'm hungry" she says and I scoff, jogging over to her. "Hungry? From what?" I ask and she glares, looking me up and down. "From taking care of you guys. What else would I do all day?" she asks. I know she works hard but it's fun to tease her like this sometimes. 

"Sit back and relax while admiring me" I say and she rolls her eyes, so much so that I would be concerned that they would get stuck at the back of her head if she tried to do it again.

"More like running ramped and being at all of your beck and call. Do you know how difficult it is to take care of five man childs and one very strict overlord" she grumbles, the last part in reference to our manager.

"Man child?" I ask crossing my arms and she nods her head without hesitation. "You sure you there's five of them? And all this time thought we were friends" I say, feigning offense and she doesn't give in. 

"What would you call what we're doing right now?" she asks, sitting down at the booth that the waitress leads us to as soon as we walk in the diner.

"A date?" I say with a smirk on my face and she shakes her head and starts looking through the menu. "More like feeding a whiney hangry baby who needs my help to survive" she say and now I'm the one rolling my eyes.

"I swear your favorite insult is getting a little bit tired isn't it?" I say and she smirks. "Well what would you call that thing that you do when you're singing?" she asks

"A cry or sometimes a growl depending on the song" I tease, throwing an arm around the back of the booth leaving her sliding away from me to create some distance between us but I slide towards her to keep her close. 

"Why do you feel the need to be so close to me?" she grumbles, accepting defeat once we're almost all the way at the other end of the booth with one good scoot, if she had taken it leaving her falling on her ass. 

"Because I like being close to you. Plus you're always mumbling whenever we're in public so this is the only way I can hear you" I explain, making excuses and she scoffs and mutters something inaudible under her breath. 

"See I couldn't even guess what you could've possibly said even though I'm this close to you" I say to prove my point. "Because it wasn't for your ears dumbass. Now figure out what you're gonna eat before I let you starve" she says, shoving a menu towards me. 

I chuckle and flip through it and eventually we're giving the waitress our orders and I turn to face Strings once she's gone.

"Why do you always treat me like I'm a nuisance when we're out in public?" I question and she takes a very long sip of her water to avoid answering right away.

"Because you are" she answers and pulls her phone out to check a message that just came in and when I see the name 'Alex' pop up on her screen I get a little disheartened for some weird reason. 

When she unlocks her phone I catch a quick glimpse of their conversation and it's full of messages planning for them to meet up. "Who's Alex?" I ask and she locks her phone immediately. 

"A friend, not that it's any of your business" she replies curtly and her pointed answer kicks me in the gut. "What kind of friend?" I ask, trying to get more information before making assumptions but she gives me nothing. 

"Just a friend alright?" she says and takes a drink of her water and I let out a sigh, scooting back and giving both of us some air to breathe.

She takes it as a chance to respond to the messages and when more come in I catch a hint of a smile and I scoff. 

"What?" she asks, clearly confused with my reaction. "Seems like they're a lot more than just a friend from the way you're smiling at their replies" I nod towards her phone and she locks the screen again and places it in her bag. 

"Fine, happy?" she says, showing that she'll give me her full attention now in hopes to change the subject and before I have a chance to the waitress comes back...

Okay that's all you're getting for the teaser because I couldn't find a good stopping point but comment down below if you'd like to be tagged!

[lesbianrobin]

waking the witch behind the scenes EXCLUSIVE

first of all: this fic started off with a prompt about eddie struggling to hide his magic from buck while said magic constantly Did Things for buck bc eddie just loves him so much. so for the next few paragraphs, keep in mind that the central idea here is eddie essentially attempting to hide his love.

i've seen and enjoyed a few different witch eddie fics and i think they're all so cool!! and i noticed that in most magic eddie fics, the magic is a Family Thing, but more specifically, it's a Diaz Family Thing. and we here at lesbianrobin hq are #feminists so obviously my next thought was, well, what if it's matrilineal? the idea of a "witch" is heavily gendered, and when i started thinking about this fic i was initially gonna take a lot of inspiration from charmed, so i thought it might be neat to make the magic something from his mother's side.

once i decided on that, it occurred to me that the only family we ever see or even really hear about is from the diaz side. eddie is close with his dad's side of the family, but we don't really know anything about his mother's side besides a vague ethnic heritage, so i was like, well, what if they don't really Have much family on that side? and from that came the idea of eddie being isolated in his magic, lacking guidance and support. pretty much all we know about helena's family is that she has some swedish heritage, though there's no telling how far back.

to recap: we have eddie, isolated in his magic. vaguely scandinavian heritage. i start looking into old norse religion and stumble upon seiðr, a type of magic traditionally practiced by women wherein male practitioners were viewed as effeminate and maybe gay. all of which coalesces into eddie's magic essentially being a manifestation of his sexuality and everything else that fails to live up to his parents' expectations.

so. eddie hides his magic. eddie conceptualizes his magic as something separate from himself. eddie disconnects himself so thoroughly from his magic that it operates against his will, that he can't even feel it. magic is gay 🫶🏻

buck knows that eddie is magically doing these little things for him. he complains about the coffee on purpose so that eddie will conjure him good coffee. and it works! yay for bratty whiny buck!

eddie's prophetic dream about his and buck's first time twists every sensation into something negative and overwhelming due to The Repression. he's terrified of coming out and really accepting and acting upon his feelings; once he actually does it, it isn't scary anymore.

the way we never were: american families and the nostalgia trap by stephanie coontz is a great book and very accessible to a general audience! also, BLK & Bold coffee is really good. i am giving buck my exact taste. don't worry about it.

i have some Thoughts about how exactly buck realized eddie has magic, how he and chris started talking about it, and the various times that buck Knew eddie was doing some magic shit and just pretended to be oblivious. however! i'm gonna hang on to those in case i ever want to write a prequel.

aaaand finally: i don't know where the hell that proposal came from. the spirit of eddie dies possessed me.

ok that's it for now love u all hugs and kisses 🫶🏻 bye

[theheirofthesharingan]

This is going to be a strange question, I think. I'm in the Naruto fandom peripherally. Kind of on again-off again, but I've always loved Itachi. I'm in another fandom as well, but I've run up against a similar issue in adoring controversial figures in the works. With your other asks, you come across as very much put-together. Seen it all twenty years ago kind of thing. So I was hoping for some advice.

How do you handle a fandom that treats a favored character poorly? It's not just the weird hatred, but it delves a little deeper. Like in fanworks that display the character as being a pedo even though it's not just unsubstantiated in canon, but pretty antithetical to the character himself. I can block and mute people on AO3 and other areas, but I guess it just gets to me. I know it shouldn't. Maybe I'm hoping for a coping mechanism or something.

Thank you for your time!

I think the deeper the love for the character is, the more it will piss you off. And the only way to survive this is that we grow a thicker skin. Even then, it can get under your skin, so I totally understand how you feel. I've always been drawn towards unpopular characters or the characters who were hated in the fandoms, so it's been hard for me to get into those fandoms, and if I did, staying in them was painful. Although, I've been active in only one fandom before Naruto, and it was exhausting there too.

The best way to deal with it would be that you ignore all the negative content on the characters and discuss things in your own little circle. When you write fics or create art, expect that circle to be your main audience. Everything else positive is just bonus. I avoid googling stuff about Naruto because I end up disliking most of the nonsense that's available on the characters. I haven't seen Itachi's portrayal as a pedo anywhere (are people writing that shit too about him, huh?), but I'm aware there are fics in which he's portrayed as a cold/abusive/manipulative person, which is completely not his canon personality. If there are people who believe those things, no way they're not writing anything like that in their fics, too.

And another thing he's a victim of (other than having a cancerous fanbase that measures his goodness as a person and a character based on his strength and skills instead of his complexity - which any sane fans of his would find disturbing) is all the misinformation about him. Why did they choose him to spread hate so much with all this. It's just so weird. These people aren't as intelligent as they think they are. And for me, it's super hard to take them seriously, because how do I take into account the opinions of the people who lack critical thinking and reading comprehension?

Sometimes I feel the foundation of the fandoms isn't love for the characters, but hypocrisy because so many feelings are involved and people don't realize when they're falling into this trap. They love one character for one thing in one fandom and then end up hating another character for the same thing in the same (or another) fandom.

For example, Itachi is an irredeemable criminal for killing people (after being groomed for years by adults around him) because he's pro-Konoha. But killing people if you're against the system is totally okay and characters like Madara/Pain/Obito shouldn't be antagonized for waging wars and dragging millions of innocent people into their ambitions more than Itachi ever did. Their manipulation, slow poisoning of the people's minds they influenced to achieve their goals is completely alright, solely because they're just trying to change the system. Similarly, Sasuke is "emo and edgy" for not being the sunshine after all the horrors he lived through and then wanting to destroy Konoha, but Obito waging war on the world makes him a "broken hero." These two species live on two different planes - one is dominant on Tumblr and the other on Insta (and both are probably on other platforms too, idk).

I guess it all will always be there. And so will the people who mischaracterize Itachi, Sasuke, and other characters. You can control some things but not everything. I've been in the fandom for a year or so, and I'm still ignorant about most of the things here other than ships. Basically this:

I might have gone off the tangent and I hope you got some answer you were looking for.

[callmearcturus]

writer questions meme: 8, 13, 20 if you please

13. What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across?

It wasn't explicitly writing advice, but I can tell you where I learned what my specific style would be. There was a fic in the Dresden Files fandom called "Cross" by LightGetsIn. LGI was a tremendous writer and a very kind mentory-friend who I attended my first fan convention with. Extremely accomplished adult who I looked up to when I was barely an adult.

"Cross" is a story about the limitations of perspective. It was the first story that really drove home the idea that Character A would not have the same knowledge and understanding of the world as Character B.

In "Cross", the POV character is John Marcone, a non-magical mafia boss who is deeply entrenched in the magical world. He has a lot of factual knowledge of how magic works, but he's an Italian-American Catholic. So when he's pulled into doing magical rites to bring another character back to life, he specifically doesn't pick up on the more pagan symbology of what he's doing, but filters it through a Guilty Catholic filter. Hence the name of the fic, "Cross."

And that story, which isn't even my favorite LGI story, probably taught me the most about how to write Close Perspective Third Person, which is my default style. When I'm writing in a characters POV, I rigorously limit what the POV character knows and picks up on. I will plant clues and information that the audience will understand, but the connections a character makes, the reference pools they pull from, their morality and ethics, all of those inform that POV, and what you and I know does not.

That is probably the most important lesson I've ever had in creating my own writing method.

20. Describe your perfect writing conditions.

8 hours of sleep, small breakfast snack like a croissant, decaf beverage, one dextroamphetamine, and no one fucking talk to me for about 2 - 4 hours. I will write 4,000 words.

8. Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

Lets put this under a cut, and I'll give you some DVD commentary. This is from chapter 2 of you'll need a new name to survive this. It's the point where Benji realizes Ethan is stalking him and does that trick to lose him in the bookshop, then sits outside waiting for him.

Only five minutes later, the door opened, and Bell took one step out before freezing, his eyes falling on Benji.

Got you, Benji thought with a sharp little smile. "You didn't even buy a book? Bit rude."

One of the goals of the early chapters of PT AU was establishing Benji's character as boldly as possible because we were essentially telling a story that canon does not. This is YEARS before MI3, where Benji gets two gd scenes.

To me, the tightrope walk was that I wanted Benji to have a reasonable grip on authority, to be shiny and new and out of his depth but still empowered because of his accomplishments. He has managed to land a good job working for the US government, he successfully emigrated before he was 30 years old, he has an apartment and a cat, he's new to everything in the spy world but he also has a steel spine that frankly he's fucking earned.

Which is a long-winded way of saying that Benji is a bitch and I love him so much.

Bell's face was blank, but Benji could almost feel how fast his brain was moving, weighing his options. Eventually, he settled on huffing out a little chuckle and stepping closer to Benji. "Hi."

Meanwhile, Ethan. MI1-era Ethan is very very smart but very very traumatised. His skillset is rooted in controlling people and predicting them. So Benji, a fucking civilian, catching him off-guard like this is like waving a red flag at a bull. Or dangling a steak over a lion enclosure. Benji doesn't know it yet but he's setting himself up to be a tasty treat for Ethan Hunt circa the late 90s.

"Are you going to kill me or something?" Benji asked. "Is that your spook job, are you a hitman?"

The flash of expression on Bell's face was offended. (This makes me laugh every time. Ethan Hunt is not a killer unless he absolutely must be and he will go out of his way to avoid it. Being an assassin is gross and he doesn't want to be perceived at all bc he's a spy but if he MUST be perceived jfc don't assume he's a HITMAN) "What, no. I just…" Grimacing, he looked away, eyes scanning the other pedestrians around them. "Okay, I'm screwing this up, I can admit that. Can we talk somewhere private?"

Benji didn't even have to think about it. "We can talk somewhere public."

Benji is never going to be an IMF agent but his instincts are wildly correct. And that knowledge comes from a different place! He was a gay punk rock vagabond who dropped out of law school, he knows how to keep out of trouble. He is probably the guy who told his other punk friends "if you are arrested do not say a goddamn thing, just ask for your public defender, don't joke, don't be a smartarse, keep your mouth shut."

The smile that took over Bell's face was lovely, transforming his whole face from storm clouds to something more seasonal. "That's honestly a very smart answer, doc. C'mon, there's a bakery nearby. I'll buy you a coffee. Least I can do."

It really was, so Benji nodded and followed him.

They didn't speak until Bell opened the glass door to another shop and held it open for Benji.

"Wrong hand," Benji said, noticing the small wince Bell let out.

"Inside, doc."

If it isn't obvious, all of the observational skills Benji has canonically have been funneled into his preternatural observation of patients.

Basically, if Benji as a character has a specific set of SPECIAL stats, all of those are the same, he just has different tagged skills in this universe.

Canon Benji is probably.... Guns, Science, and Repair. PT Benji has Medicine, Barter, Speech.

"Not a doctor," Benji said. "You know I'm not a doctor."

"What do you want to drink, doc?"

Ethan is being purposefully annoying and I could write a whole post about Ethan's soft power and the way he manipulates people, but that'd be another post. Short version: some people you seduce, some people you act like a wounded gazelle at, and some people you annoy.

Inside the bakery was loud. It was a strangely open floor plan. A long pastry case cordoned off the seating area for the customers. On the other side was just… the bakery. There were ovens and industrial mixers and rolling racks of cooling bread. In the corner, the espresso machine howled with noise as the milk frother worked.

It smelled divine, like living inside a baguette during a spring shower of dark roast coffee.

It also was a constant racket, which Benji mentioned to Bell as he sat down and slid a dark tea with vanilla syrup across to Benji.

"That's the point," Bell said, slouching back in his chair. "It's very difficult to eavesdrop in here."

Well, he wasn't wrong. Looking to another occupied table nearby, Benji briefly tried to pick out a word of what was being said by the woman seated closest to him. Nothing.

"Right, then," Benji said, attention back on Bell. "Why are you following me?"

"Why?" Bell seemed taken aback.

One of the many moments in the early chapters that establish that Ethan's perception of Normal is not anything approaching actual normal.

"Yes, why."

"Normal intelligence collection."

"On your physical therapist?" Benji asked with a barked laugh.

"Yeah." Bell leaned on his elbows, one hand cupping his own jaw and holding his head up as he made uncomfortably direct eye contact. "You really don't know who I am? Or why some of the appointments on your calendar come with no information?"

Pursing his lips, Benji shook his head.

Blowing out a whistle through his teeth, Bell grinned. "Sorry, that's just… it's new. I'm surprised Dr. Falsion didn't clue you in, but I guess she's not technically supposed to." Lifting his mug, he looked down into it. "People do shit they're not technically supposed to all the time in this town."

Ethan's major trauma at this point is being targeted by Kittridge and the Mole Hunt, and his trust in people to do their jobs is at a critical low that it'll never recover from.

"I don't even know your name," Benji sighed, sipping his own drink. It didn't taste at all like iocaine powder, so he was probably safe for the moment.

Bell rested his temple against the knuckles of his hand, his gaze so intense that Benji didn't know how to look away without making it patently obvious he was unsettled. Whatever Bell saw, it made his lips curve up slight. "Alright. Yeah. My name is Ethan. I work for an organization that shouldn't legally exist, so that's why you don't get anything on me. Even CIA jackboots manipulating local governments are realer than I am." He blinked once. "Also, I was an unprofessional shitheel last session, and I apologize."

Ethan apologizes here because Benji has earned his respect. And also by earning his respect, Ethan is also aware that Benji is not going to be so easy to maneuver around, so he fesses up that he was a prick, softly setting up a different tactic with Benji.

Benji felt his eyes going wider and wider with every sentence until it was a little hard to breathe. So his patient wasn't the American equivalent of an MI5 or MI6 so much as an MI8?

That did sort of start to explain what a pain in the ass he was.

"Shame," Benji managed after a moment of sitting fairly gobsmacked. "I was getting attached to 'Bell.' But I appreciate… all that. Thanks." He frowned. "Are you saying all this because you're actually sorry or are you sick of being stonewalled?"

Benji has a much more cynical mind than Ethan is the funny thing. Benji gets arguably more accurate reads on people than Ethan does. Or, Ethan gets accurate reads but he is continuously poisoned by the hope that people will be better than he expects. So FUNCTIONALLY, Ethan is an optimist and Benji is a realist.

Bell— Ethan— grinned. "That's a very good question. You actually have great instincts, doc. You did a surprisingly good job of shaking me when I was tailing you, especially for a civilian."

One of my favorite running gags is Benji being impossible to tail, so I'm glad we really drove it home the first time it happened. I love consistency in longfic.

"Again: thanks. Don't suppose you'll answer my other question?"

Ethan sipped his coffee, his smile visible around the edge of his cup.

"Right," Benji sighed. At least this felt like progress. And at least he probably wasn't going to be disappeared by a government assassin. That was a relief.

So this entire bit is Ethan reassessing Benji and pivoting his methods and tactics, setting up for a better way of handling Benji. And also being kind of charmed by him.

[shadowgast-recs-weekly]

Shadowgast Recs: Time Travel and Time Loops

This week, we have 12 fics that feature time travel or time loops under the cut! Check them out, and don't forget to comment or kudos if you like them!

Something Worth Saving by cow_queen (35341,Not Rated) Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence and Major Character Death (But they get better eventually)

A Groundhog day AU where Essek keeps reliving the day the Dynasty killed the Mighty Nein, constantly going back to the beginning in a desperate attempt to save his friends.

Reccer says: I really enjoy the way the timeloop mechanic is handled here actually, and rather enjoy the slow realization of who is really causing problems.

in the times in between by jakia (8098,Teen) Warnings: None

A strange man keeps showing up to help the Ermendruds, but Una thinks he's really swell, if not a bit odd and strangely familiar...

Reccer says: Look, I just love Una's perspective and how we as an audience know who this man is but she doesn't. I just adore this fic so much.

To be Defeated and Victorious by basically_npr_trash (6394,Teen) Warnings: none

While on a mission for Master Ikithon, Bren receives a letter from a mysterious Dynasty stranger offering a tenuous olive branch. Bren's rational side tells him to burn it immediately, but something pulls on him to follow through. A This Is How You Lose the Time War AU

Reccer says: It's got enemies to lovers, time travel, spies, clever places to hide letters, and the letters themselves!

Another Time, Another Place by Operafloozy (9780,Teen) Warnings: none

Essek and Bren are time travelling spies that write each other letters. They fall in love.

Reccer says: It's This is How You Lose the Time War AU that focuses a lot on how their relationship changes from enemies to falling in love, and has some great visuals and lines in it. Also has a great Astrid and Eadwulf Cameo

the better version of our past by KmacKatie (5840,Explicit) Warnings: None

In the split moment where Caleb and Essek use the gem to give everyone some much needed rest, they see visions of alternative timelines

Reccer says: The vibes are so perfect and weird. A wonderful emotional roller coaster for our boys

displacement by mllekurtz (12834,Explicit) Warnings: Dubcon in the flavor of past!Essek sleeping with present!Caleb without disclosing that he isn't present!Essek

Post-97 Essek gets body swapped with his post-campaign self, sleeps with Caleb, and reckons with the fact that the Nein seem to love him.

Reccer says: This is Essek at his most self-loathing and Caleb at his most Essek-loving. That combination is heartbreaking in the best way, and makes the comfort that comes at the end hit that much harder.

Breaking Inertia by futureshieldmaiden (31096,Teen) Warnings: none

Caleb and Essek get stuck in a time loop, and have to work together to get out of it.

Reccer says: An interesting take on the time loop idea - I like how having both of them stuck in the time loop changes the dynamics between them, even as they discover more information about each other along the way.

a shape made by our hands by saturdaysky (4158,Teen) Warnings: none

Caleb time travels to a decaying timeline and meets a young Essek.

Reccer says: The look at Essek as a child is both adorable and heart-wrenching, and the way present day Caleb and Essek respond to what happened is perfectly them.

time will come by mieletthe (5750,General) Warnings: None

In his old age Essek travels back in time to visit an elderly Caleb for a conversation on grief and death.

Reccer says: A remarkably cathartic and tender story. If you need a good cry, here it is!

if only for a moment by saturdaysky (2035,General) Warnings: deals with the eventual future death of a main character, but no one dies in the fic

Caleb accidentally travels forward in time, far past his death. Essek is there and has been expecting him. They share a soft moment.

Reccer says: Sky handles the topics of grief and love with such exquisite care. I cry wonderful cathartic tears every time I read this fic. I'm tearing up writing this summary. Read this fic, you guys.

Twelve Thousand and Sixty-Five Seconds by LessAttitudeMoreAltitude (1945,Teen) Warnings: There is repeated major character death and suicide, neither being permanent but is nonetheless present

Time was Essek's speciality. Which was why, waking up in his dark cell on the day of his execution, he immediately noticed the dozens of threads of possibility. Countless echoes of Caleb trying over and over again to save him. And they only got more numerous the closer he came to his death.

Reccer says: I liked it!

And then two for this last fic:

The Fullness of Time by Cers (162788,Teen) Warnings: None

In the battle against Lucien, Essek makes a gamble that accidentally sends himself and Caleb back in time. They have to work to figure out how to get back to save their friends.

Reccer 1 says: This fic is incredibly well written and the last couple of chapters left me a mess with my emotions. Lots of good bits of the wizards trying to figure out their feelings and then avoiding talking about them Reccer 2 says: One of, if not the best Time Travel fic out there. Cers explores the highs and lows of time travel, along with the paradoxical risks associated. HIGHLY Recommend.

Aeor is for Lovers is an 18+ Shadowgast Discord server. The above fanfic recommendations were pulled from our community for this weekly event. All fics, unless otherwise specified, will primarily feature Shadowgast.

Have any questions about what this is? Check out the FAQ! Next week’s we’re going to have fics that go a little darker - featuring Ludinus Da'Leth!

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Just go along.

by Sandra_Cisne Bruce give up on being the single sex toy friend, so he come up with a brilliant plan to gaslight, gatekeep and girl boss his way into Diana and Clark's relationship, it's risky, overcomplicated and we don't talk about the ethics of it. They won't even notice when he snuck up until it's too late. The only problem with his perfect plan: Diana and Clark had been in a relationship with Bruce for the past six months (?) Words: 6446, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: F/M, M/M, Multi Characters: Batfamily Members (DCU), Justice League (DCU), Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent, Diana (Wonder Woman), Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Barbara Gordon, Tim Drake, Cassandra Cain, Damian Wayne, Damian Wayne's Pets, Duke Thomas, Stephanie Brown Relationships: Diana (Wonder Woman)/Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Batfamily Members & Bruce Wayne, Justice League & Bruce Wayne, Diana (Wonder Woman)/Bruce Wayne, Clark Kent/Bruce Wayne, Diana (Wonder Woman)/Clark Kent Additional Tags: Past Relationship(s), Past Abuse, Past Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne, Past Talia al Ghul/Bruce Wayne, Past Harvey Dent/Bruce Wayne, Crack, Past Minhkhoa Khan/Bruce Wayne, All of Bruce's previous relationships are toxic in some way, Consider this a warning if you really like any of them., Bruce Wayne Tries to Be a Good Parent, But results may vary..., Established Relationship, But Bruce hasn't realized it yet, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Feelings, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Relationships, DC stands for Disregard Canon, Crack Treated Seriously, If somehow this looks like canon, I apologize for that., Batkids are menaces, Batkids want Bruce to be happy, we don't spend so much time with the exes..., But the bat kids gonna bring it on A LOT., This whole fic is ridiculous, ¿What's my life?, T because Jason, No beta we died like everyone in the batfam, No brain like Bruce in this fic, Or in the Canon..., english isn't my first language, Please be nice, Also first time writing anything remotely creative on english, My First AO3 Post via https://ift.tt/9rvK21q

[anidiotwithfanfiction]

An excerpt from a Nickles fic I'm scraping.

I'm still writing one, this just isn't what I want for it.

Warning for very brief gore

A scream rips through the room, the sound sending a shiver up the singers spine.

He's used to blood and guts.

Gore and viscera.

It's a casual, horrific delight he's grown numb to.

It's like chaos seems to follow him.

Ever in his shadows, just a step behind.

It's strange, how seldom shock comes to him.

But as the pretty little redhead on screen gets ripped to shreds, something in him stirs.

The fear in those vivid green eyes. Her flushed freckled cheeks splattered with crimson.

And it isn't real. It's just some shitty movie banned in just about every country for 'graphic material'. The plot's not even that engaging.

But Nathan, he's really connected with this character.

She's sloppy, abrasive, sexy and witty. She hot, man.

The ideal girl really, even if she makes for a shit protagonist. Not meant to appeal, not meant to connect with the audience. You're supposed to feel some kind of catharsis as she's slain, that's what the critics say at least. But as white knuckles grip a little tighter at the cushioned arm rest, all Nathan can process is this sort of profound grief.

He didn't want her to die.

The credits roll, the rest of the band shuffles to their feet. Murderface snoring obnoxiously. At least that was better than the first half of the movie, in which he had spent it interrupting every five second to say how lame it was. Skwisgaar stretched, and it wasn't hard to see the way Tokis eyes immediately glanced down to the patch of flesh revealed as his shirt rode up. The Norwegian's face flushing red.

And Nathan was a bit slow. He could be dense at times.

But everyone excluding the pair noticed how head over heels the two were for each other.

It made him want to cringe. He hoped if he ever fell to the same fate someone would give him the courtesy to at least smack him out of it.

But despite how much the band has hinted to the two their obvious feelings for one another, they never seemed to get it. Like to love or be loved was so out of the realm of possibility for either, that the concept simply didn't exist to them.

Cold digits glide atop his hand. Realizing he's still clawing at the poor seat, he relinquishes his grasp.

Looking over, those friendly green eyes look through him. He doesn't have to say anything, Nathan knows what that look means.

"It's nothing" he mumbles, standing up with the rest. Pickles follows him, his hand sliding down to the small of the singers back. He hides it, not that he needs to. With Murderface asleep and Skwisgaar and Toki in the same room as one another, they might as well be halfway across the country.

Red dreads brush against his shoulder, a shudder running through him. Barely above a whisper the drummer asks

"Drinks?"

He pulls back, and Nathan turns a bit too quick. Their faces close. He brushes off the jump in his stomach, it can be nerve wracking. He's lived so much of his life isolated. Being around others like this would always be new to him. It was an even greater leap to get accustomed to Pickles. The guy was just so touchy. He's like that with everyone. As though he's starved for the slightest bit of physical contact.

Nathan shakes his head, shelving those thoughts. It's small enough to go unnoticed, even under that perplexing glare.

"Hell yes" he smiles.

"What'd ya think of tha movie?" The red head asks before taking a puff of the blunt. They've shuffled off to his room, leaving the others to themselves.

"Was pretty shitty. I mean, the plot made no sense"

Pickles chuckles as he passes the bud.

"Dood I know, like, why'd they have that five minute shot of tha fucking church that literally never came up again?"

"Who the fuck picked the movie this week?"

"I think it was Skwisgaar, somethin bout tha gore being really good"

Nathan's stomach churns. It was a little too good.

"That chick was hot though" it slips. It's not like it's something they avoid talking about, hot bitches come up pretty often in this lifestyle. But as of late, he's done his best to avoid the topic around his drummer.

He can't put his finger on it, but the conversation always steers... somewhere else.

"Which one? The brunette chick? She was okay" he hits a bong at his bedside. The singer jolts a bit, quickly taking a puff of the blunt before passing it back.

He watches as clouds of white pour elegantly from those plump pink lips.

"No, I mean yeah I'd do her-"

There's a glint in those green eyes as Pickels cuts him off

"The redhead" the tip of his tongue pokes out of the corner of his mouth, prominent canines pressing against it.

"Seems about right" he teases.

"She was hot dude"

"I think yew've just got a thing for redheads"

"I've got a thing for women, okay" the singer refutes. "Hot, sexy women."

The drummer rolls his eyes "Hey nobody's objecting ta that" he raises his shot glass, with a heavy handed pour of scotch. Nathan looks down, not surprised to see the same awaiting him in the drummers other hand.

He takes it, rough hands lingering a moment too long.

They clink their glasses and throw the shots back.

Bottles are scattered across the room by now, a deadly mix for your average Joe. But Nathan's still got his wits about him.

For the most part, anyways.

Pickles has been doing double time, it's impossible to keep up with the guy, and the singer gave up a while ago. No one can out drink him, and back when he used to try... well things didn't end up so well.

But that was many years and many E.R visits ago. Now the singer knows his limit. Not that he adheres to it, but he knows.

And on the fourth bottle of bourbon, he's quickly approaching it.

Between the liquor and the weed, he's struggling to stay upright. Resigning himself to sprawling out on the drummers bed. It's comfortable, even if the decor in here screams '80s rockstar'.

Pickles passes him the joint, how weed always magically appears in the guys hand, still evades the singer.

He pulls slow, feeling the smoke clamber down his throat. His lungs expanding, filling with the intoxicant. The hum of the t.v quiets, the shitty sitcom they've got playing fades into the background. The drumming of the singers heart comes into focus.

It's soothing, a steady beat comforting him as he tunes the world out.

He's fucked up.

He was shitfaced five drinks ago, green out of his mind three joints back.

It wasn't something he was unaccustomed to.

But shit, this was intense.

Probably the strain, or maybe even the Vodka, but right now, he was out of it.

A cold hand taps on his shoulder, and his eyes dart to the redhead. Those pretty lips are moving, but he's not taking in a whisper of it.

The freckled hand is back, snapping in front of his eyes. He blinks, hard and slow. Tries a little harder to listen.

"Are ya deaf?"

"Huh?" Glazed over greens match the drummers, as Nathan grounds himself a bit.

"I said are ya fuckin deaf, jeez dood" he seems so exacerbated.

"No... no." He shakes his head, scooting closer to where the drummer lies beside him.

"Just fucked up is all" he manages, slurring only half of his words.

He can't help as his head falls to the redheads shoulder. Too far gone to notice the way the man jolts. Chilly bare arms wrap around his frame, pulling him closer.

"Cahm here, let mama Pickles take care a' ya"

He nuzzles his face against the worn black fabric of the drummers shirt. His cheeks brushing against flushed skin.

"Soft..." He mumbles, more to himself than the room.

And that icy hand is gripping his waist just a bit tighter, pulling him in. They're pressed together now, Nathan cradling the drummer, his cool flesh like the cold side of a pillow. Refreshing, calming, intoxicating.

"Mm just gonna take a nap"

"Yew do that buddy" he can hear the smile in his voice.

"So fucking comfortable" he mutters, burying his face into the drummers chest. Breathing in that sweaty smoke stained musk. His ear propped to his chest, he listens to the drummers heartbeat. The quick pace soothing, as he drifts off.

[not-a-space-alien]

Savage Sunset Choose Your Own Adventure 30

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | Part 23 | Part 24 | Part 25 | Part 26 | Part 27 | Part 28 | Part 29

Story masterpost

Series is for 18+ audiences only!

All entries in the CYOA

So, the audience chose the first option for the finale--"Encourage Valen to stay as long as he wants. Talk to him about his project more."

After giving it some thought, I realized this is basically the route Lex and Ari went in the actual story, and so the sequence of events would likely not be significantly different! So I thought the best way to end this might be to decide what would happen on each option.

Sorry for not giving a more detailed ending to send this out with a bang! But hopefully you will enjoy some of these scenarios and feel free to imagine how it would go! Not sure if anyone would have any interest in doing so, but you're all perfectly welcome to write your own fic about it.

***

Encourage Valen to stay as long as he wants. Talk to him about his project more.

As I said the winning option would go basically the same way as canon, except Felix and the narrator would be there instead of Lex and Ari. Lex and Ari would probably eventually snoop around and become secondary supporters, the way Bailey and Jerome do in canon. Valen would probably eventually end up with a unit of six hunters invested in protecting him.

Keep Valen here and make it known what a horrible mistake the hunters made.

Valen is nervous about you telling anyone, but if you're able to convince him to stay and let you go public with it, he hunkers down and braces himself for the attention. It ignites an absolute shitstorm of national arguing--public opinion in areas where vampire attacks are not common is overwhelmingly on Valen's side--and those in areas who do live at risk of vampire attacks argue it's very easy to take a moral high ground when you don't live in danger yourself.

The director is a politician at heart and cares very much about the guild's public image, so Nick is fired and jailed. The director asks Valen to leave to avoid more attention, but the rest of the guild rallies to his side as happens in cannon, so eventually the director backpedals and lets him stay. The fact that everyone knows he's there means Valen is continually anxious; unlike canon, where his presence is kept more lowkey, he starts getting volumes of letters--both supportive and hatemail. The window of discourse in public life shifts to talk about whether or not vampires should have human rights.

Get Valen out of here, then make it public what happened.

This goes the same way as the previous option, except Valen isn't there to feel threatened by the attention. You keep him updated on the situation, until one day you can't get ahold of him again. A few weeks later, he gets off a frantic phone call that he's been pressured to come back to the Kithrara estate, and your group of 6 supportive hunters plan the same epic breakout that happens in canon. It ends the same way as scenario #2.

Get Valen out of here as soon as you can--he isn't safe. You can stay in touch.

You hurry Valen over the border ASAP, then have regular phone conversations with him. He's once again pressured to come back to the Kithrara estate, except this time you haven't spent enough time with him for his first instinct to be to call you. You never hear from him again--He eventually realizes he needs to leave Priscus and musters up the courage to do it, but by then he's basically too scared to call you again.

Get Valen out of here and never speak of it again. Hope you don't get caught.

You toss him over the border and don't get caught. You never hear from him again. You live with the incident in the back of your mind for the rest of your life, wondering if you made the right decision.

***

Thank you all for playing along!

***

@aceouttatime

@annablogsposts

@cc1010foxy

@darlingwhump

@dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night

@dokidokisadness

@emcscared-whumps

@gt-daboss

@melancholy-in-the-morning

@nicolepascaline

@oddsconvert

@pigeonwhumps

@pumpkin-spice-whump

@scoundrelwithboba

@starfields08000

@some-thrilling-heroics

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@whump-cravings

@whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump

@whumpycries

@whumpsday

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[snowbellewells]

Fandom Birthday Rec List for @jrob64

Happy Birthday, dear Joni! Happy Birthday to You!!!

Okay, when I set out to make this list of my favorites of your works, I had a couple in mind right off the top of my head, and thought "This is a no-brainer! It'll be easy!" You would think I'd have known better after the massive list I created when Krystal asked for our favorite fics overall a couple years ago and I ended up making a Sweet 16 style bracket to even narrow mine down. Needless to say, I ended up with a solid dozen stories on my paper, instead of the five or six I needed, and discovered a few hidden gems from way back before I knew you that I hadn't even read!! However, my very, VERY favorite has never wavered and is still exactly the same - you'll see! ;)

Anyway, I am so glad I found your wonderful writings, have gotten to know you in person, text with you, travel with you, and become genuinely good friends. Your are a blessing in my life, and I hope this gift brings a bit of a smile to your face as I try to celebrate the joy you've shared with us all in creating further adventures for our pirate and princess. Happy Birthday!!!

**Top 6 Favorite @jrob64 Fics (in descending order)**

#6 - "One Thrill Ride Leads to Another" (my own birthday fic! ;p )

This five part (six, with the epilogue) story is pure fun and chemistry and sweetness overload. I adore it more than I can really say, and am beyond flattered that a handsome sight and chance comment of mine helped to birth the original idea. And no, it isn't even just because this one include an alive and happy Graham as supporting character and a hilariously hot secondary Red Huntsman plot line -- though it certainly doesn't hurt!! ;) My rambling can't really do this one justice, so if anyone reading this has missed it, I beg of you: Check it out for yourself! It's a perfect summer treat!

#5 - "Silly Songs With Killian" (Modern AU one shot - adorable!)

Okay, I realize that I am using a valuable spot on this list for a fluffy little one shot, but it's just that much fun and has that much heartwarming power. I dare you to get the image of Killian playing VeggieTales on the guitar for a wildly enthusiastic audience of one small boy who is madly excited by the effort out of your head! You won't be able to - it's gonna stick with you and make you smile every time it floats back in!! If you've had a bad day and need a pick me up, this is your fic right here!

#4 - "Taking on Mrs. Jones" (hilariously hot silver fox one shot)

This is another more comic/lighthearted one shot, but I just can't resist it. In fact, I re-read it in making certain of my list, and I love it all the more. This one features a slightly older, professor Killian (one of my serious weaknesses) and a married version of CS. Plus, when he gets an overly flirtatious new co-worker who makes him uncomfortable - Emma comes perfectly to the defense of her man and teaches that girl a lesson.

#3 - "Ghosted" (a WIP supernatural modern AU MC for @cssns24)

This story is still in progress, but it has very quickly jumped the list to become one of Joni's best, best offerings (in my humble opinion)! I love the unusual and intriguing plot and can't wait to see how it will turn out. The inclusion of Will and Belle as secondary characters (and a secondary love story) is wonderful👩🏻‍🍳 *chef's kiss!* And a ghostly version of Liam absolutely tugs on my heart. Definitely check this one out if you haven't yet.

#2 - "Always in my Heart" (5 Part Modern AU, so feelsy and angsty and deep)

This one moved me to tears in the process, way more than once. I loved the long lost friends reunited aspect of this story, right from the start. I loved the sense of adopted family Emma has with David and MM, and most especially Ruth. (I always loved David's mom in canon, and the chance to see a lot more of her in this fic, and to see what this version of her means to Emma was priceless, even if heart wrenching too.)

#1 - "Sowing Seeds of Trust" (and its extra chapter "Marco's Legacy")

This story was the first one of yours I discovered, Joni, and I was completely captured! It was wrapped around my heart from the very first chapter. I loved the vulnerability and need, but also strength and resilience, in this version of Emma. I loved Killian's support, understanding and love in how he reached out to her. I love the friendships with David, MM, Ruby, and of course MARCO!! (He steals the whole show here, honestly!) The faith and restoration and perfect "happy beginning" after trials in this story are original, unique, and unforgettable. It's always going to be my favorite, I think, as it lead me to your writing to begin with, and it touched me deeply.

*Honorable mentions - if anyone is curious - also not to be missed:

"Snowstorm Confessions"

"Lonely No More"

"Faultline"/"Seismic Waves" (Liam x Elsa)

"Where Her Heart Belongs"/"Her Heart's Home"

"For the Sake of Henry"

Hope you enjoy your little list - and an absolutely wonderful day!!! Very Best Birthday Wishes to You!!!

[undertale-fic-librarby]

Thank you for doing Gods work.

Anyways here are some recs

https://archiveofourown.org/works/56548525/chapters/143717419

This one is set in Dreamswap which isn’t something that I’ve seen a lot yet soo

https://archiveofourown.org/works/40377891

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28674579

Uhh Underswap

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13919349

Slice of life

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7291828

Mob AU letsss goo

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16310669

Howdy, & thanks for the recommendations! The fics being recommended are…

Undertale and Undertale AU Oneshots by Dubs_ORama (Not Rated, Incomplete)

Oneshots and maybe imagines with the character depictions from my other fic Ok, Now There are Skeletons It's not set inside of the fic necessarily, but it is with the same depictions of these characters, and with similar context in some cases. But, unlike my fic, this reader will be gender neutral unless otherwise specified. Also, I'll probably have multiple AUs in some chapters. !!TAKING REQUESTS!! (Can be characters not in my fic) It's also some parts that I wanted to put into the fic but I just couldn't find space for them ; v ;

The Stars Beneath Us by EngineeringBlondie (General Audiences, Complete)

Finding yourself in a whole different multiverse wasn't exactly how you were planning your week to go, but knowing you, it was bound to happen at some point. But hey! It's not all that bad.. well except for Dreamtale being in utter chaos, not having the squad with you, and being 'kidnapped' a couple times. But then again, this multiverse was already proving to be much better than your previous one. Or at least, there is more opportunities here. And come on, how could you miss the chance to see this many stars?! Now you just needed to figure out how to get the squad here, hopefully without the stupid chicken. Nightmare has a bad feeling, your Nightmare. You'll just have to make sure he doesn't go insane with worry.

Lay It All on the Table by lulu-writes (Teen And Up, Complete)

As hilarious as Papyrus had said it would be, you're starting to realize that Sans might have been hitting on you just as much as you'd been hitting on him. All under the guise of friendship. Feeding each other food? Holding each other's hands? Embracing tenderly? That's... That's all platonic, right? You're definitely not flirting.

Rain, Rain, Go Away by ToumeiKyoudai (Not Rated, Incomplete)

You're a happy person. You always like to look on the bright side of things. On your way home from work, you get completely drenched by pouring rain. You decide to hide in a nearby apartment building, but the lady at the welcome desk keeps giving you a very unwelcoming look. That just means you have to buzz one of the rooms, right? Then you'll appear as though you belong there! Your outgoing attitude combined with your ceaseless positivism leads you to press a button labelled 402. A few puns later, the stranger on the other end warms up to you, and the two of you talk until the rain dies down. Maybe the rain isn't so bad.

You're Broke? They Break Bones and Break Bank. by Trash_McTrash (Not Rated, Incomplete)

You're kinda fucked financially since you lost the job that barely kept you afloat, put food on your table, and barely paid your bills. So you go job hunting a couple days after losing your job and filling out resumes, and dropping them off at every working establishment from retail to actual jobs in your field. After you finish, you decide to go out for coffee as a reward, and you're chilling at the cafe, relaxing and letting yourself go for awhile as you people watch. Then you leave, making a fatal mistake that goes unnoticed by you. Until you get home. And you realize you forgot your fucking wallet. With all your cards, and your cash, and your I.D. Goddamnit.

[fastcardotmp3]

tagged by my adored alex @gothbat99 to do a little self-love moment 🥹💛

rules: post five of your favorite fics that you've written and talk about why you love them. tag some mutuals so they can do the same and we can all spread some positivity about our writing ❤️

✨someone else's favorite song - 120k | rated E - I swing wildly on the pendulum between loving this fic for all that it is and wanting desperately to Fix It, but lately I've felt a lot of pride in this thing, warts and all. I went into this one thinking I was the extent of the audience for it and let the stream of consciousness muscle pull it out of me without much forethought, but ended up finding so much connection to the people reading it who felt seen or understood in some way in their own grieving processes. No matter where I am on the pendulum of feelings about this story, I am never not grateful that my own little catharsis has been able to create a sort of 'not aloneness' every time someone is kind and courageous enough to share their own stories with me in the comments 💛

✨that's just wasteland, baby! - 19k | rated E - I started writing this entirely because at the time I couldn't find any fics that really dived into what an apocalyptic Hawkins setting might look like and I wanted to READ it more than anything. It's so slice-of-life in that world and I had really so much fun building up the rules of the world and the dynamics between characters still in the fight but settled to an extent within a new normal to the point where even Steve can't even remember how long they've been doing it. 'the world ended but we're still going' is one of my favorite premises of all time and this universe is one I'm genuinely SO proud of without any equivocation about it UGH

✨how the light gets in - 29k (wip series) | rated T-E - if there are going to be one million and one versions of kas!Eddie (including my own) there HAS to be a kas!Chrissy and by god if I have to do it myself I WILL. Wheelingham is one of those things that just smacked me in the face one day when I realized the unending potential of taking a fridged girl, bringing her back to life, and making her kiss the final girl, like... COME ON. This series is a labor of love and it's truly such a joy to do a proper character study on two girls who have so much untapped potential built into their psyches. they're my babies I am holding them gently in my hands and never letting go :(((

✨METAMORPHOSES - 160k | rated E - I think of everything I've written for ST, this might be the thing that's most structurally sound writing-wise, like it's long enough that there are definitely spots it could use smoothing, but I am genuinely so proud of how it turned out and how it told the exact story I set out to tell. I love these characters, I love their little house in Indy, I love the ways they grow and regress in tandem, I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOR. Never has a vision I had at the start ended up feeling So Right to this extent and I will never stop screaming about this fic just you try to stop me 💚🐍

✨The Hawk - 10k (wip series) | rated T - "The Bear" AU that no one asked for but which I am wholly and completely enamored with only 2 'episodes' in. Another chance at a Nancy-centric story with the added bonus of getting to write so many POVs of a larger ensemble? Incoming Ronance and Lumax and Steddie and Jargyle?? Wheeler sibling dynamic exploration?? it's my DREAM tbh and it's surprisingly simple to slot our ST characters into this wildly different world because you know what! At the end of the day it's all just about family isn't it!!! UGH. Once I'm done with writing (redacted) trust that I will be launching myself back into this one full-force, I've got so many plans and I can't wait to show you all more of this world

(if you've already been tagged apologies but also) tagging! @kkpwnall @fragilecapric0rnn @judasofsuburbia @gideoncharov @figthefruitfaeth @cheatghost @stargyles @capriciouslyterminal @sharpbutsoft @hellsfireclub