#come on mates aussies are great

[sunrizef1]

What happens in Vegas pt 1.5

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Authors Note: had to write this twice because tumblr deleted it lol. Not sure how to tag this so I’m just tagging my general tags. Proofread but not well.

Warnings: Blood, cursing

Summary: When the drivers found Max cheating

Masterlist

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“Dannyyyyyy” your voice rings out through the noise of the crowded club, your words catching the attention of the Australian in question.

The Aussie turns his head, a grin on his face as he holds up a bottle of champagne he seemed to have convinced the bartender to hand over. You laugh at his state, drunkenness clear in the way he sways as he staggers over to you. You wrap an arm around his tall shoulder, leaning on him in order to sort out your own less-than-sober state.

Lights flash brightly around the two of you, fellow drivers and F1 employees spread throughout the club, not including anyone from Red Bull for some reason.

You couldn’t find it in yourself to care, vodka practically running through your veins as you celebrated your win. You had won your home race and you were surrounded by your friends. The absence of some people you didn’t really like didn’t bother you all too much.

“Have you seen Logan?” You look up toward the Aussie again, eyes darting quickly around the club for your friend. You had been with the blond practically the whole night but as soon as you had gone looking for Danny, he had disappeared from your side.

Luckily, you didn’t have to search for long as another arm comes and wraps around your shoulder suddenly. You turn your head to find Logan, a dopey smile on his face and, weirdly, sunglasses.

He had been drinking just as much as the rest of you had, even downing about half a bottle of vodka in under twenty minutes. Better than you would’ve done considering you thought vodka tasted like shit. Good for shots though.

You reach up and fix the glasses that had gone sideways on his face. His hand follows yours, still clutching a drink as he follows your lead in fixing the random glasses.

“Why’d you have glasses on?” You have to yell slightly as you say it, prompting Danny to glance over from where he’d been watching Lando convince the current DJ to let him have a go. You’d have to give it to him, the man’s pretty convincing when he’s drunk.

“Someone gave them to me, not sure when, don’t really care. They’re sick though, right?” Logan leans back slightly to give you both a full look at him and you laugh as he sways a bit. His blond hair is ruffled and he’s acquired someone’s paddock pass throughout the night, along with the glasses and he’s looking like he came straight from the race itself.

“Yeah! You look great, mate!” Danny’s laughing behind you and Logan grins while he leans back into the little huddle you’ve created, patting Danny on the back as he does.

“Where are we heading then, gang?” Logan slurs, downing the rest of his drink and slamming it down on a nearby table and then turning his entire form toward the two of you.

You walk forward a bit, dragging the two drivers with you, both of their arms falling off your shoulders, “I was gonna go back to my room but I can't find max.”

You had already been dealing with Max’s absence since, well, yesterday at that point and it definitely contributed to about 5 of the shots you had taken. By now it was about 1 am, you had been in the club for hours, you were hungry and drunk and just really wanted to go to bed. But you couldn't do that because you couldn't find max and something in your drunken mind said you had to find him before you could go to bed. Something about not going to bed angry after a fight.

A fight that, truly, you didn't really have a part in. It wasn't your fault that Max had lost. I mean, it technically was but you shouldn't have been expected to let him win. Red Bull had practically been asking you to lose to him all season and you win once and suddenly Max is yelling about how inconsiderate you are.

“Come on,” Danny starts to walk toward the exit, leading you and Logan behind him as he does. The three of you stagger through the crowd, many people stopping you go congratulate you and chat as you do. By the time you've reached the strip, you've completely forgotten about Max and instead, you're only thinking about the hunger in your stomach.

“Im starving,” you mumble as you lay your head on Logan who smiles down at you, once again wrapping his arm around your shoulder.

You pay no mind to the cameras flashing as the three of you walk out or the stares that come your way. You’re more concerned about where the nearest restaurant is.

Logan moves away from you to dig through his pocket and you take the opportunity to adjust your dress, the fabric suddenly too tight on your heated body. You also wish you could take off the shoes that were causing your feet to ache. Danny takes a swig from the bottle that he, surprisingly, had been allowed to take from the club. Hair sticks to your foreheads and clothes sit rumbled and wrong. The spitting image of three elite athletes.

Logan moves back toward you to hand you the phone he had just pulled from his pocket. You had honestly forgotten you had given it to him to hold considering your dress didn’t have pockets.

“Thank you,” you nod gratefully, unlocking it to an influx of messages from friends and family congratulating you on your win or sending pictures from the club.

You clutch the device tightly as you cross your arms in an attempt to shield yourself from the cold Vegas air.

When a particularly cold chill runs through your body, you’re suddenly moving down the sidewalk, heels clicking as you try not to sway. The boys behind you follow in suit, seemingly trusting the, for the purposes of this race, Vegas native.

“Where we going, then?” Logan asks, a yawn escaping him as he readjusts the sunglasses perched on his nose.

“There’s a shake shack at New York New York,” you follow suit in yawning, pointing slightly ahead at the Empire State shaped hotel in front of you.

Daniel hums, “I want a burger.”

You laugh slightly, leading both of them toward the restaurant.

You three get there pretty quickly, ordering random greasy food that your trainers would probably disapprove of. When you sit down, you pull out your phone and send a quick series of text to Max to ask where he was. He hadn’t been there the whole night and you had finally started to miss him. He reads the messages but doesn’t reply, leaving you with a sick feeling in your stomach.

You bite into a fry to try and cover the nausea, opening your text chain with Charles and texting him instead. He actually replies this time and soon enough, Charles is on his way to you three from wherever he had gone to sober up earlier in the night.

“Charles is on his way,” you say through another yawn, eating a fry.

Daniel scarfs down a few bites of his burger, swallowing a full gulps of his drink right after, “For what?”

“Gonna help me find Max probably. We’re all too drunk to do anything by ourselves anyway.”

“Not too drunk to order food by ourselves,” Logan says, probably louder than he needs to, leaning back in his chair, glasses still on and a drink in his mouth, “Let’s fucking goooooooo.”

He follows Daniel’s lead and starts to munch on his food quickly, food you’d paid for by the way, when you turned out to be the only one who could get their Apple Pay to work.

You take a couple more bites of your food while the boys scavenge their food as if they hadn’t eaten in years.

“Hey guys!” You look up to see a particularly sober Charles Leclerc strolling through the shake shack door. You perk up when you see him, a small smiling making it through the exhaustion you were feeling.

“Hey Cha,” you say, standing up to give him a small hug, staggering a bit on your heels as you do. He leans back as you release him and steadies you, holding something up to you as he does.

Your eyes widen as he holds up a pair of converse in your eyesight and you gasp happily, quickly sitting back down in your chair and starting to fumble with the clasps on your heels.

Your fingers shake with exhaustion and alcohol and the clasp escapes your hands more than a couple times.

“Here, let me do it,” Charles offers as he sets the shoes down on the ground next to you before kneeling in front of your chair and grasping your ankle lightly.

You don’t look across the table to see Daniel and Logan making kissy faces at each other as they both stuff their faces with greasy food and soda. But you can hear their mocking kiss noises and you roll your eyes as you finally look their way, glaring as you do. They both shut up and go back to the phones in their hands.

Charles makes quick work of the clasps on both shoes, sliding the heels off your feet and untying the converse before handing them to you. You slide the shoes on and stand up, wrapping up your excess shake shack as you do.

Logan makes a noise of protest as you move to throw the food away and you sigh before sliding it across the table back to him. He makes quick work of the food, with help from Daniel reaching over his shoulder to grab food in between Logan’s bites.

You and Charles wait quietly for the two of them to finish. You eventually open your mouth to ask him a question but he seems to beat you there.

“Do you know where Max is?” He says quietly, eyes staring kindly at your tired state.

“No, he hasn’t answered my texts,” you mumble sadly, head falling to rest against your hand on the table. Charles moves slightly closer to let you rest your head on his shoulder and your eyes start to flutter closed. You were just nodding off when a loud band comes from across you and your eyes open to see Logan slamming his empty drink on the table just before Daniel does as well.

They both move from the table quickly and you and Charles rush to follow them as they bound out of the restaurant in their drunken stupor.

“Let’s go find max!” Daniel yells out swinging an arm around the blond man’s shoulders.

“To finding max!” Logan responds swinging his own arm around Daniel.

You and Charles share a look at the two of them. You had been just as drunk as them but you seemed to be sobering up quicker than both of them.

You glance down to see your heels clutched in Charles hand and pull out your phone to take a picture while he’s busy looking over your shoulder at the two drunk formula one driver some yards away.

“Come back here, losers!” Charles called out to the two of them and they both turn back to you and stumble over, seemingly dancing to music that wasn’t playing.

“We’re going to Omnia,” Charles says to the three of you and that’s all the boys need to turn around and wander toward a building they don’t know the location of.

You roll your eyes at them but follow quickly after, trying to make sure they don't wander too far away. Charles is quick to walk beside you.

The walk isn't too far, your drunkenness slowly decreasing throughout the stroll. Luckily for you and Charles, by the time you all get to the club, Daniel and Logan have sobered enough to at least walk in a straight line.

Omnia is nestled inside of Caesars Palace so it wasn't hard to find but Daniel and Logan do both try and walk past the hotel. You and Charles have to call them back and drag them into the lobby of the hotel.

The four of you wander over to the club, glancing around but when your efforts seem fruitless, you decide to wander around the area instead of just looking at the club.

The four of you wander around aimlessly, looking for any signs of your boyfriend. You glance up to see Charles with his eyes set forward, still clutching your heels in his hands. Logan and Danny fall in line next to the two of you, seemingly sobered enough to be helpful now.

Eventually you round a corner and come face to face with a surprisingly empty area, not a soul in sight. The silence almost echoes off the vaulted ceiling, making the sound of your four sets of shoes seem almost loud in comparison.

You don’t see anything in the room and go to turn around when Logan catches your elbow, “Is that him?”

You turn back around to follow Logan’s point, eyes locking on a brunette man. Of course, Logan has just been extremely inebriated so his judgement probably wasn’t the best but you decide to listen to him anyway.

You move to take a step toward the man when he stumbles backward, letting you see that it is, in fact, your boyfriend. But what causes your eyebrows to furrow is the familiar girl hanging off of him, lips practically attacking his own.

You can’t move. Your eyes are locked on the couple and your feet are solidly rooted to the marble floor. You think you might be crying, you wouldn’t be able to tell. The only thing that pulls you out of it is the feeling of a pair of heels being shoved into your arms. You glance up just in time to see Charles reeling his fist back.

You don’t think you’ll ever forget the sound of a nose breaking under a fist. Of course, it’s quiet so that probably helped a lot.

They’re screaming at each other and your brain, once again, tunes it out. You stare blankly ahead, trying to make sense of whatever the fuck you just saw. You’re pretty sure Charles’ girlfriend flees. Probably for the best. Logan swings a tanned hand in front of your eyes and suddenly the volume in the room is back once again, the screaming slowly filtering into your head.

“What the fuck is your problem?” Charles yells, blood dripping down his arm as he shoves Max in the middle of his chest.

“What’s my problem!? What’s your problem!? You’re already fucking my girlfriend, I was just evening the score,” Max spits, blood splattering against Charles’ white shirt as he shoves the man’s wrist away.

“What are you talking about? I didn’t do shit, man!”

“You proved it by showing up with her,” Logan inches forward as Max’s eyes land on you for the first time that night, seemingly ready to defend your honor. Or whatever.

“Taking her to help her find her boyfriend who turned out to be cheating on her with my girlfriend. Yeah seems really romantic mate,” Charles rolls his eyes. You can tell from his stance he’s ready to throw another punch in a heartbeat.

“Fuck you, Charles.”

“Fuck you, Max.”

There it is, the second punch flies and the two start to brawl. Rich idiot brawling, of course, no real form or anything. You reckon Max could throw a pretty good punch if he was in a better state. In the moment you’re just glad he isn’t. For Charles’ sake.

You suddenly realize that the area might not have been as secluded as you had thought. When you glance up you’re met by the literal strip, bright lights streaming in from the outside. Even at the ripe hour of 3 am. People start to gather at the commotion. Usually you’d care a lot about this kind of stuff but your brain is unfortunately too preoccupied to care.

One of these people that takes it upon themselves to insert themselves in the fight is none other than Checo Perez. The man on the grid who you could stand the least. Or at least he used to have that title, that might belong to Max now.

Upon the sound of more yelling, you tune him out. Daniel’s the one who moves in his path, causing the man to turn the argument onto Daniel. 5 foot 10 Daniel who’s been itching to throw a punch since this fight started. Daniel who was, until quite recently, black out drunk. Daniel who you knew, deep down, didn’t want to punch Max so this was a perfect solution.

You don’t end up remembering how it happens, your brain fogged with alcohol and emotions but one second, Checo and Danny are arguing and the next second, Logan’s landed a punch.

Honestly, he has a killer right hook. Especially for a drunk man. This spurs another fight and you can’t do anything but stand still in the middle of it all, tear stains running down your cheeks and high-heels clutched tightly in your arms.

It feels like an eternity later, but what probably only 5 minutes, when a figure comes up behind you and wraps an arms around your shoulders. You glance up to see a wild Oscar, pulling you away from the scene. He drops your shoulder to move back and pull Logan out of the fight, now with a bloody nose and bruised knuckles. You’re not sure how much fighting he did and how much of it was just him hitting random surfaces. Again, drunk.

You turn toward Charles and see a now unoccupied Checo walking with an arm around Max’s shoulder and a now quite sober Lando pulling Charles the other way. Danny’s made his own way out of the area, quickly pulling you away with him. You don’t argue as he does, grateful for the escape. Sound comes back to you as you re-enter the casino floor, slot machines and black-jack spread out around you.

You realize how crazy you all probably look, all six of you covered in blood in some way. Whether it be your own or a friends. You all stagger out of the hotel quickly and at some point, you lose Charles and now it’s just you, Daniel and Logan, just like how you had started the night.

Once the air hits your face you realize the reality of everything that’s just happened. Your three year relationship was now over. Your teammate and boyfriend just cheated on you. This had to be some sort of HR violation.

For the first time since you entered the quiet area, you feel yourself cry. Tears run down your cheeks as sobs rack your body. Logan is quick to get you somewhere to sit down and he lays an arm around your shoulder comfortingly, not even thinking about the fact he’s now smearing even more blood on your clothes. You get distracted form your crying when you glance up and see the blood streaming from his nose. If you could help it, you’d get his name the farthest away from this. He didn’t need this right now.

For a moment you’re too worried about Logan’s future to cry but then you glance back down at the blood on your own hands and the waterworks start again. You, of course, hadn’t punched anyone but the blood was a reminder that somebody had because of you.

You eventually get the sobs to go away, standing up with a slight wobble, leaning on Daniel as he catches you.

You have no idea where the rest of your friend had gone or even where you were gonna sleep tonight. So you text the one person you had complete faith in during this situation.

“Can I stay with you?”

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[eternally-racing]

how do you like your eggs? | lando norris

pairing: lando x reader (w/ best friend Danny Ric) 

genre: fluff 

wc:1.2k

summary: Lando’s determined to show you how much you mean to him by cooking you breakfast, even if he is horrible in the kitchen.

— — — — 

“You’re being way too loud, mate, you’re going to wake her up.” 

There’s too much rummaging through cabinets as Daniel asks Lando if he can get his sifter out from the cabinets. It sure as hell would be a lot easier to find if Lando actually knew what a sifter was, but as a boy who’s gotten most of his meals delivered to him and has become a creature of habit for the select few that he does make on his own, it’s safe to say that he is an absolute menace in the kitchen. 

After your boyfriend Lando had last minute decided to go to Australia to visit Daniel, you received enough facetimes and text messages from him begging for you to come visit that you had finally caved to spontaneity and flew into Perth the night before. 

Lando was nothing but a gentleman, and he wanted to do something special to show his appreciation for you going out of your way to spend time with him. Every sacrifice that you make definitely does not go unnoticed, and in the little time that he has during the offseason Lando likes to make sure that you know how much he loves everything that you do for him. 

And somehow that led to his master plan of wanting to cook breakfast for you. He knew that he was no masterchef, but Lando had hoped that having his former teammate help him out in the kitchen would be enough. It started as a plan to make a full English breakfast. Then Lando realized that Daniel’s fridge looked like he hadn’t gone grocery shopping since the two of them were teammates, so the plan got switched to just eggs and homemade biscuits. And after two failed attempts at making dough for biscuits that had only led to a colossal mess on the kitchen countertops they finally settled for making just eggs. 

“There’s a really great breakfast cafe down the road, Lando. I’m sure Y/N would like that just as much as..” Daniel’s voice trails off as he looks at what he used to be able to recognize as his own kitchen “whatever this is that you’re doing.” 

Meanwhile, Lando is at eye level with his bowl of freshly cracked eggs as he is carrying out what he can only describe as a “rescue mission” to fish out the pieces of eggshell that have fallen into the bowl. 

“Shut up Daniel, it’s a labor of love, you wouldn’t get it.” He continues to pick out a concerning number of pieces of shell.

“More like a labor of salmonella” Daniel snickers as he leans against the counter. 

The Aussie is quick to jump out of the way when Lando throws a piece of shell at him and misses, only adding to the mess in the kitchen. Luckily, he’s saved by the bell when you finally stumble out of the bedroom, sleep still clouding your eyes. 

“Good morning sunshine!” Lando yells from the stove as he’s finally gotten into action cooking said eggs. 

With the promise that in 2 minutes there would be fresh eggs for breakfast, Lando guides you to sit at the table. You hadn’t realized until this moment that you’d never seen Lando cook at all, let alone cook for you. He was a great sous chef when he asked you to be, but you weren’t sure of his abilities when left to his own devices. 

“Breakfast is served!” Lando says as he lays the plate in front of you. You raise your eyebrows in surprise, biting your tongue to keep your initial reaction from slipping out. 

“They’re poached!” your boyfriend exclaims with a smile.

Lando looks so proud and there’s no way you can break his heart over what is certainly a non-edible, definitely not poached egg that he has placed in front of you. 

“Thank you, baby” you smile as you pinch his cheek.

You can see Daniel posed behind Lando wildly shaking his hands and mouthing “DO NOT EAT” as he watches you toy with the runny eggs in front of you. You would do anything for Lando, including eating an icky egg, so you pick up your fork and dig in.

It’s definitely still raw, which you expected from its appearance, but there’s subtle hints of vinegar and sugar and something spicy that feels especially vile on your tongue. Your best attempt at a poker face cracks near the end as you try to swallow, but you’re quick to try and cover it up. 

“Wow, you did something really special with these Lan” you say, choosing your words very carefully as you try to wash out your mouth with a non-suspicious amount of water. 

Lando offers to try them and you figure there’s no point in stopping them as he piles some egg onto a spoon. You swear it barely even touches his mouth before he spits it back out right onto the plate. 

“Oh my god - you swallowed that??” The British boy doesn’t even dare to put his tongue back into his mouth as he tries to brush the taste off his taste buds. You can’t help the giggle that bubbles up inside you as you and Daniel start to keel over in laughter. 

“Mate - you let me serve this to my girlfriend?? I could have killed her or something with this!” Lando turns to Daniel in his rage.

The Aussie is laughing and is trying to rationalize that the egg is probably not deadly as he continues to gasp for air. It’s Lando who makes the next move to grab the plate and dump it in its entirety in the garbage.

“That’s a porcelain plate, Lando!” you exclaim from where you’re sitting. 

“”Please, it’s probably a biohazard at this point. I  think I owe Daniel an entirely new kitchen at this point anyways, so he can just add this to my tab.” Lando jokes as he pulls you towards the bathroom, gesturing towards the mess on the counters as you both walk away.

“Lando, she’s so in love with you because you couldn’t pay me to eat that shit.” Daniel says as he watches the both of you share the bathroom trying to brush the vile taste off your tongues with your toothbrushes.

Lando keeps the toothbrush in his mouth as he goes to wrap his arms around your waist, something that has you shrugging away since you’re pretty sure he’s drooling on your shoulder, and you tell him exactly that. From the side Daniel can’t stop laughing as he stares at you two. 

The British boy stays attached to you as he leans over to spit out his toothpaste, mumbling something you can’t quite understand.

“ I sdflksnjo sdlkgsnd” 

You almost choke on your spit listening to Lando’s babbling as you hunch over to do the same in the sink. 

“I was trying to say that I’m so lucky to have you baby. I love you.” 

You can't help but smile against Lando’s lips as you pull him in for a kiss. There’s still a vague taste of vinegar and egg that you know will linger for a little too long, but more than anything, he tastes like love.

---

author's note: this was just something fun and sweet inspired by Lando's recent interview about his Australia trip! Thanks for all the love :) Until next time! - Em 🤍

[lovelytsunoda]

welcome to wherever you are // lance stroll

summary: weddings are supposed to be joyous occasions. but for lance's fiancee, the wedding is just another big milestone that her father never lived to see, like her first day of kindergarten, or her high school graduation.

pairing: lance stroll x hutchence!reader

warnings: depictions of greif, mentions of a parental death.

author's note: i've been on such a bender lately listening to inxs, they truly were one of the greatest bands of the 80s, and I think its a shame that things ended like they did with micheal's death in 1997. i could genuinely talk for hours about it, and about the very real daughter he left behind, but for now i'm going to let the fic speak for itself.

also i feel like i've only done smaus lately bc i've just been in a total idea rut and these are so easy to make lmao

y/n.hutchence just posted to her private story!

VOGUE Weddings: Inside the wedding between Aussie-rock darling YN Hutchence and F1 driver Lance Stroll (you might have to click on these to read them properly)

y/n.hutchence just made a post!

liked by lancestroll, kirkpengilly, officialinxs and 34,508 others.

y/n.hutchence today was a hard day, despite being the happiest of my life. like most milestones, it was bittersweet. while i spent most of my day in love, and excited for what's to come, part of me was also grieving. my dad should have been here to walk me down the aisle, to meet my husband. to give a speech at the reception. i miss you, dad. but i know that you'd be so proud of me.

to my lovely lance, thank you for choosing me, for loving me. for reminding me that its okay to feel all the emotions at once. i love you forever, my husband xx

see all comments

lancestroll i love you, my darling wife. you are so strong.

andrewfarriss michael would be so proud of you, kiddo

user the fact that she went public for the day just to speak about her grief on her wedding day . . . that's a caliber of person i could never be

sebastianvettel thank you both for including me in your special day

user she walked down the aisle to 'beautiful girl'....i'm totally not crying my goddamn eyes out

user im not crying you are

user her dad died over 20 years ago....she needs to let it go

-> user lmao imagine telling someone who never knew her father outside of how the media portrayed him after his death to 'get over it'.

mickschumacher 10/10 pasta bar, would come again. your harem of old men scared the crap out of me, though.

-> kirkpengilly old?? who are you calling OLD

-> y/n.hutchence you mean my non-biological uncles? mick, they're the biggest sweethearts

y/n.hutchence just added to her story

y/n.hutchence and lancestroll just posted!

liked by astonmartinf1, sebastianvettel, timfarriss and 29,808 others

lancestroll mr. & mrs. hutchence - stroll, march 2024, sydney australia

see all comments

y/n.hutchence i think lance hutchence sounds pretty great

-> lancestroll and i think y/n stroll sounds pretty good too

scottyjames you're taking her last name? good on you, bro

astonmartinf1 welcome to the family y/n! (or should we say 'welcome to wherever you are'? see what we did there?)

fernandoalonso did anyone else get a little teary eyed during the vows?

-> timfarriss i was right there with you mate

-> mickschumacher i saw esteban cry so hard he gave himself the hiccups

y/n.hutchence hey google, play 'never tear us apart' by inxs ( and say thanks to kirk for playing the sax almost all night)

(next part)

TAGS:

@magnummagnussen @libraryofloveletters @httpiastri @lorarri @cartierre @thatsdemko @sidcrosbyspuck @scuderiamh

[gguk-n]

From Pitches to Podium (Oscar Piastri x Indian Cricketer!Reader)

This idea came to me after I saw Pat Cummins at the British GP. No face claim. All the pictures are from Pinterest or Instagram

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by 1378 others

y/n.y/l/n Ever since I was a little girl playing street cricket, I had dreamt of this. Dreams really do come true. Can't wait to lead the best team to more victories. Thank you for believing in me!!😭😭💙💙

user 1 Congrtulations. You're a great team player, you'll be a good leader👊👊 user 2 Can't wait to see you as the captain y/l/n🥹🥹

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by 13,869 others tagged oscarpiastri

y/n.y/l/n I had told myself that I would behave like a professional but I can't; not when Oscar Jack Piastri just won his first F1 race (It might have been a sprint but idc) Congratulations Oscar!!😭😭🥹🥹🧡🧡🧡

user 3 I thought this was a Oscar fan account, turns out she's the captain of India's women's cricket team 🤣🤣🤣 user 4 Congratulations Oscar!!🧡🧡 user 5 Hope to see you win like I saw Oscar won!!😪❤️❤️ bff/user you are a PR nuisance!! How does your coach and manager deal with you? 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

oscarpiastri

Liked by y/n.y/l/n, mclaren and 240,250 others

oscarpiastri Suitcase going to weigh a little more on the way home😃🏆

mclaren 🙌🙌 y/n.y/l/n SO PROUD OF YOU OSCAR!! CONGRATULATIONS!! 😭😭🧡🧡 user 6 SO DESERVED!! thrilled for you user 7 where are you going to put it?? user 8 beautiful user 1 she's back guys!! Oscar's No.1 fan 😂😂

oscarpiastri

Liked by landonorris, y/n.y/l/n and 287,756 other

oscarpiastri F1 race winner has a nice ring to it 🧡 landonorris Congrats mate! Deserve it👊 oscarpiastri landonorris Thanks mate👊 mclaren YES, YES IT DOES So good today, Oscar🧡 oscarpiastri mclaren Thanks guys 🧡 y/n.y/l/n I'm literally crying right now!! Can't wait to watch you win the WDC😭😭😭 user 2 y/n.y/l/n ma'am please focus on your own sport🙃🙃 user 3 The best boy!!❤️❤️❤️

oscarpiastri

Liked by y/n.y/l/n and 209,323 others

oscarpiastri N1CE

y/n.y/l/n 😭😍😍😍 user 4 I can't believe you won the sprint!! user 5 I'm so happy rn user 6 You deserve all this and so much more

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by oscarpiastri and 56,789 others

y/n.y/l/n We had a good season!! Bummed we didn't make it to the finals but happy with our performance over all. We'll work harder to get the T20 World Cup trophy home next time.

oscarpiastri Good match!!💙💙 Liked by author user 7 Thank god he noticed her, it was starting to get embarrassing🫢🫢 user 8 Good match, we'll beat the aussies next time!!🫣🫣 user 1 manifestation is real. she's the living example😭😭

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by oscarpiastri, mclaren and 102,258 others tagged oscarpiastri, landonorris, mclaren

y/n.y/l/n Got to meet the LOML and some random guy named Lando, thanks McLaren for the opportunity!! Now you guys gotta come and support me in one of my matches!!🧡🧡💙💙

landonorris that was uncalled for😪😪 y/n.y/l/n landonorris I'm sorry, it sounded better in my head 😶😶 mclaren we loved having you. Orange suits you🧡 oscarpiastri It was nice to finally meet my no. 1 fan!! y/n.y/l/n oscarpiastri 🫣🧡 user 2 she's gonna talk about this for the rest of her life🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ user 3 she looks so cute😍😍 user 4 I saw her at the GP, the heart eyes for Oscar were unreal🥹🥹

oscarpiastri

Liked by y/n.y/l/n, landonorris, mclaren and 287,965 others tagged y/n.y/l/n

oscarpiastri If someone had told me last year that I would be in love with a cricketer I would've laughed at you. Right now, I can't imagine a day without my pretty cricketer!! Love you so much!!

y/n.y/l/n I love you too!! Does this mean you'll support India now? oscarpiastri y/n.y/l/n No. I'm sorry, I don't love you that much 🫥 y/n.y/l/n oscarpiastri WOW!! what a boyfriend you are?! 😯 user 5 Congratulations you too!! So cute❤️❤️ user 6 This is a win for desi girls ❤️🥹 user 7 Your Honor, I think I love love.❤️❤️ landonorris Congratulations you two!! Liked by author mclaren hottest athletic couple on the grid🧡 Liked by author

y/n.y/l/n

Liked by oscarpiastri and 139,864 others tagged oscarpiastri

y/n.y/l/n I didn't know when I put Oscar Piastri is the LOML into the universe it would become a reality. But it did. That's motivation for you all to keep working towards your dreams and goals whether it is your career or a man!! I love you babe. 😍😍❤️🧡💙Ek pardesi mera dil legaya!! A foreigner took my heart

oscarpiastri I love you too!! Can't wait to live out my WAG fantasies y/n.y/l/n oscarpiastri I'm gonna drag you along to all my matches now😈 user 8 Oscar is unreal user 1 they are the cutest!! bff/user You would think she'd stop yapping about Oscar, it got worse guys it got worse😤🤦‍♀️ user 2 Y/N please put him a black kurta!! I'M BEGGING YOU ITS FOR SCIENCE!!🥹🥹

Hope you enjoy

[superficialdomina]

Down Under - Part 2

Word count: 2.1k

Part 2 Warnings: 18+; minors DNI. Loki thirst. Aussie slang. A big lizard. Language. Reckon that's about it.

Part 1

Series masterlist

Image credit

Part 2

The SHIELD operative who’d been sent to guide you into Hall’s Gap found you an hour after dawn, as you were packing up camp – just appeared out of the bush like Waltzing Matilda’s ghost, wearing an ancient cork hat and carrying a walking stick taller than she was.

Bruce offered her his hand. “Bruce,” he said. “Thanks for meeting us.”

“Aah, Dr Banner!” she said in a broad Australian accent, enthusiastically shaking his hand. “Great to finally put a face to ya name! Call me Ray,” she added, smiling widely as she nodded at the rest of you.

Thor – who was imposingly dressed in full battle attire, his red cape fluttering in the morning breeze – took her hand and kissed it magnanimously. “A pleasure to make your acquaintance, Ray.”

Ray looked horrified as she pulled her hand out of his meaty grip, and Thor’s face fell as she wiped it on her shorts. “That what yer wearing, mate? Ya might get a bit warm.” You saw Loki hide a grin behind his hand.

“Ah - what happened to Agent Herriman?” Banner cut in before Thor could respond.

“Ol’ Jack? Crook, mate. Laid up down in Ballarat.”

Banner looked to you, and you realised he was waiting for a translation.

“Oh – he’s sick,” you supplied, distracted. You turned to Ray. “He doesn’t have this – this new infection, does he?”

“The horny bug?” She shook her corks to clear a swarm of flies that had gathered. “Nah, got the ‘rona.” She was still eyeing Thor as though he were a serious threat. “We ready to hit the frog n toad?”

“Just one more thing,” Banner said, pulling a series of small plastic cannisters from his pack and passing them around. “Antifungals. Take one every 12 hours. If you do get exposed, these should protect you.”

“Assuming it’s a fungus,” you added pointedly.

“Assuming it’s a fungus,” Banner agreed. “You too, Ray.”

Ray took the small bottle sceptically, stashing it somewhere in her myriad of cargo pockets. “Righto. Watch out for snakes.”

You left the campsite in single file, Ray in the lead. The climb wasn’t especially steep, but it was steady, with no undulation to offer respite to your burning calves. The bright summer sun quickly turned the warm morning into a swelteringly hot day, and your pack, filled with standard camping gear and an extensive list of SHIELD tech equipment, was heavy. You shifted uncomfortably at the sweat that had gathered between it and your skin, the damp spreading through your shirt.

You glanced up at Thor, ahead of you on the trail, still ridiculously dressed in battle leathers. They must be finding this heat brutal, you thought.

There was a scoffing sound behind you, and you realised the branch you’d just pushed past had flung back to nick Loki square in the face.

“Oh - sorry,” you said quickly, grimacing at the angry red mark across his eyebrow.

“I should be more careful,” Loki said acidly. He wiped his forehead, leaving a dusty, sweaty smear, but he didn’t complain further.

If Loki was handling the conditions with stoicism, Thor was more than making up for his silence. His face was bright red, and sweat poured from every conceivable inch of skin. He had begun using the corner of his cape to wipe his brow, and it was now a murky, rusty brown colour. At least he’s getting some use out of it, you thought wryly.

“Gah! These infernal flying creatures will be the death of me!” he bellowed, arms flailing at a cloud of bush flies.  “Why must they congregate in the immediate vicinity of my face?! Aargh!” he spluttered, voice raised an octave, dramatically forcing air out his nose. “One of them has just flown up my nostril!”

“Supposed to be good luck,” Ray called back seriously, “’specially if it comes back out ya mouth.” Thor made a gagging noise; Ray didn’t seem to hear him. “There’s water in about half a k; we’ll stop there for smoko.”

“What is "smoko”?” Loki asked, as you carefully passed him the next cleared branch.

“Um - morning tea?” you replied. You swallowed as his long fingers took the branch from you; you weren’t often this close to him, and his lean body was distractingly luscious. Fuck, he really does look good in hiking gear.

There was another yelp from Thor, who had mistaken the snap of a stick underfoot for the strike of a snake.

“It’s the scorpions you’ve got to watch out for,” Ray added, not pausing in her climb up the overgrown track. “At least a snake’ll let you know it’s there.”

Thor’s mouth hung open as he stared after her.

Hall’s Gap was nestled into a long, flat gully between two mountain ranges, with a lake at one end and a steep climb out of the valley at the other. When the five of you arrived in the late afternoon, you quickly set up a small base camp a short distance from the lake edge, in the long shadow of a high rocky outcrop known as Sundial Peak.

You washed briefly in the cool water, rinsing away the sweat and grime of the day’s hike. It was all so… familiar. Feelings you had pushed aside all day came rushing back. Memories of the last time you had stood in the Australian bush, your back turned to your family home after another long, drawn-out argument with your conservative, narrow-minded father. Tears streaming down your face as you decided it was time to pack up and leave for good.

That was years ago. You can’t step in the same river twice, you reminded yourself. You were not the same person who had walked away from them that day.

Somewhat cleansed – literally and metaphorically – you made your way back to camp. A squawk from a large eucalypt announced your arrival; Thor ducked dramatically, covering his head with his hands.

“Gads! What the Devil is that noise?!”

“What – you mean the cockatoo?” you asked, puzzled. “That squawking?”

“Cock or… Two?”

Before you could correct him, Ray also returned, a very large, very dead goanna heaved across her shoulders. She slung it to the ground in a single, fluid movement. Thor saw the flick of its tail out of the corner of his eye and gave a high-pitched yell.

“It’s dead, you buffoon,” Loki sneered at him, “and it has legs.”

Ray grinned. “Caught him scurrying up a red gum.”

Your eyes were wide with hunger and glee. “They’re meant to taste really good!”

She gave a comical double-raise of her eyebrows. “Once that fire’s got some decent coals under it, we’ll get ‘im cooking.”

Later, as you all licked charred remnants of the oily white meat from your fingers, you made plans for the following day. Bruce picked up his cell phone and waved it around hopefully.

“Won’t get any signal up here, mate,” Ray said, as she casually carved a goanna rib-bone into a fishing hook.

 “In that case,” Banner muttered, giving up on his phone reception, “I guess we do this the old-fashioned way.” He pulled out of his pack a large, paper map, and smoothed it on the ground.

“We’ll split up tomorrow. Thor and I will go into town and see what we can learn. If we’re lucky, I’ll find some unlucky bastard who’s dead enough to give up an infected brain sample. You two,” he glanced up at you and Loki, “will head into the national park to look for signs of Hydra. Ray will wait here for us and keep an eye on –”

“Fuck off,” Ray laughed, then realised Banner wasn’t joking. “Begging ya pardon, Doc, but if you think I’m waiting around here like an arsehole, yer dreaming.” She pointed her sharpened bone in the direction of town. “I’m coming with you.”

“Ah,” Banner hesitated. “Um, alright. I guess Ray’s coming with us.” He looked at you again. “Everyone back at camp by dark. If you don’t find anything, we can continue Thursday. If you do find something, stay in touch with the satellite radio. Apparently,” he added dryly, “there’s no cell service up here.”

Ray threw her head back and cackled with laughter.

You reached the summit of the Sundial by mid-morning. Dropping your day pack, you sucked down a large swig of water, then looked back at Loki below you on the trail. His hair was pulled into a low bun, that goddamn Akubra slung low over his eyes. It was, admittedly, sexy as fuck.

“Are you OK, Loki?” you asked as he neared you. It was reaching the hottest part of the day, and you were pretty certain that Norse Gods weren’t meant to be out in this kind of weather.

“Fine,” Loki snapped. His face was pink, and grimy with a combination of sweat and dust. At your small recoil, he softened. “I’m fine. Just... Hot.” He reached the uneven spread of rock you were standing on, and looked out across the valley, where the outcrop’s finger-like shadow fell over the smattering of houses far below.

“It’s pretty exposed up here. We should keep heading down and find some shade.”

“A moment,” Loki said, turning to look down over the other side of the crest. “How far are we from SHEILD’s first suggested location?”

You pulled out Banner’s tightly folded map. “We’re… Here.” You pointed to the little triangle marking the summit. “And Stark’s algorithm predicted these,” your finger passed over a small cross etched in red pen, “as possible Hydra sites. This is the closest one.” Loki peered at the little markings, then out across the landscape again.

“I am correct that the first of them should be in the next valley?” He pointed.

“Um…” Maybe? “Yeah, I think so.” You looked again at the worn paper. “At any rate, there’s probably water there. Give you – ah, us – a chance to cool down.”

You continued along the steep trail, descending now, watching your step in the uneven terrain. To the right of the track was a sheer drop; a misstep could send you on a severe short-cut to the creek at the bottom of the valley.

Loki must have stumbled behind you; you were briefly showered in loose scree and rock that had caught on his boot. You were about to ask him again if he was alright, when you heard it – running water. No, not running, you realised excitedly. Falling.

Another 300 metres, and the two of you stood at the foot of a roaring waterfall.

“Well,” Loki said, delightedly throwing his hat to the ground. “Shall we?”

Before you could answer, his long legs were carrying him to the water’s edge, a shimmer of seiðr peeling away his clothing as he went. Naked, he slid into the deep pool and dipped under the water.

Holy shit. It was only a second’s glance, but it was an image that you were certain would remain with you for a lifetime. The God of Mischief’s long, broad back and perfect, muscular ass, flexing as he strode away from you before it vanished under the surface. Holy shit.

You freed yourself from your own gear and waded in, gasping as you did. Unlike the Asgardian prince, you had opted to keep your underwear on, but the flimsy fabric did nothing to dull the slice of the cold. You knew the secret to quick acclimation, however, and with a hasty three, two, one, you ducked your head under the surface. When you reemerged, Loki was nowhere to be seen.

A short swim brought you to the foot of the falls. This close, the sound of it drowned out everything else; no birdsong, no insect buzz, no gentle wind through the treetops. Just the eternal roar of water crashing into the plunge pool. Even the force of it splattering your face was secondary. Behind it, the undercutting formed a dark, cavernous chamber, isolated from the world by the endless curtain of falling water, its sound muffled by its reflection off the rock face. The pool itself was deep – you couldn’t touch the stony bottom – and the rock was sheer, with wet striations reaching upwards to an uneven overhang way above. The seclusion was almost eerie.

“Fuck!” You jumped as something wrapped around your ankle in the dark water, before Loki’s mischievous grin emerged. “Jesus Christ, Loki!”

“Just ‘Loki’ will do,” he smirked. Does what it says on the tin, you thought grudgingly, eyeing him. His bun was gone; his wet hair was slicked back from his glistening face, fanning out over the pool and his bare, pale shoulders. His sculpted, naked body was only inches away from you under the water; you tried desperately to think about anything else.

“Good news, Agent,” Loki continued, still with that shit-eating grin. “I found a cave.”

Tags in comments xx

[cuddlepilefics]

Who decided ice cream is “sick people food“?

Fandom: Stray Kids

Sickie: Felix

Caregiver: Seungmin

Prompt: @sicktember

No one’s POV.:

A cold had been passed around the group recently and just when Felix thought he had managed to evade it, he was the last member to come down with it. It wasn’t so bad when he first woke up, noting how his nose felt blocked on one side and his throat itched. Figuring he just needed a drink to soothe the dryness in his throat, Felix rolled out of bed and was hit by a wave of vertigo, that made him plop back down on his bed. It took a minute for his head to stop spinning before he could make another attempt. “Oh, you’re up early”, Seungmin commented, when the Aussie joined him in the kitchen. Nodding, Felix mumbled: “Needed some water.” They both looked shocked at how croaky his voice had come out and Seungmin quickly poured him a glass of water. “Are you sick?”, he frowned, brushing the backs of his fingers against Felix’ forehead while the older sipped his water.

Felix set the glass down on the counter and cleared his throat, humming: “Didn’t think I was. I dunno. My throat kinda hurts.” – “Yeah, you still don’t sound so great”, Seungmin agreed, “You don’t feel warm but I wouldn’t be surprised if you started to run a fever later. A sore throat and shot voice were how it started for most of us.” – “Ugh, I really hope I won’t”, the Aussie muttered, massaging his throat, “We got stuff to do.” Having stuff to do had rarely been enough to convince fate not to hit, so Felix shouldn’t have been so surprised when he already grew sleepy again once he got in the car. His mind has been hazy all morning and Seungmin probably had a point. Still, Felix hoped he’d be able to hold out a little longer before the cold did him in.

Knowing how unrealistic it was that Felix should be the only one evading the group’s germs, Seungmin slipped a few packs of tissues into his bag. If his predictions were right, the Aussie would need them sooner rather than later. Good thing he did because Felix woke up from his unintentional nap to a completely blocked nose, that started to run like a faucet as soon as he got out of the car. “Oh dear, it finally got you too, mate”, Chan greeted, taking a single glance at his dongsaeng. The younger hadn’t even needed to say a word, that would’ve given away the rough shape his throat was in. Nodding defeatedly, Felix breathed: “Could’ve disregarded it as a fluke this morning but it’s getting worse. I’ll just see how long I can last.”

Though they would’ve liked Felix to rest, Chan knew there was little he could do or say to convince the younger and he didn’t want to pull the leader card. At least, not yet. He could just keep an eye on Felix and make sure he took it easy today. If he developed a fever, it should make it easy to get him to stay home the next day and since the rest of them had just recovered from the same cold, Chan could just pretend to be tired himself, so that was why they needed to take more breaks. The leader sold it almost convincingly but eventually, Changbin caught on. Well, it was rather hard to miss when Felix muffled cough after cough into the crook of his elbow, the sound low and painful. “Sip this slowly”, the rapper instructed, handing Felix his water bottle. Steadily rubbing his dongsaeng’s back, Changbin hummed: “Do you wanna sit down for a bit? You look wiped.” – “If I sit down, I don’t think I’ll get back up again”, the Aussie croaked, tears stinging his eyes, “Worst is my throat anyway and that won’t get better by sitting.”

“Perhaps not by sitting but maybe if you suck on a cough drop?”, Jeongin offered, holding out his hand. He still had a bunch in his bag but didn’t need them anymore, at least not as badly as Felix did. The Aussie accepted it and popped it between his chapped lips. All the mouth breathing he was doing was drying out his lips. For the moment, it did soothe the irritation in his throat a little but that didn’t last long and the further the day progressed, the worse the pain got. Eventually, Chan decided to send the younger home because he could barely talk and his eyes had finally developed that feverish gloss. Felix wasn’t particularly pleased with the decision but knew there was no point in arguing. The entire group had been through this cold, all of them taking at least one sick day, so why should he be the exception? He’d need to rest and wait it out just like everyone else.

On the way to his dorm, Felix started to shiver. Yup, the chills were most definitely setting in. More of a reason to take that nice hot bath, he had been contemplating. He had the time and really wanted something to clear up the congestion, so he’d dig out the eucalyptus bath salt his mom had gifted him once and enjoy a nice long soak. Hopefully, it’d soothe his achy muscles too.

Chan had also instructed him to have some soup for nourishment and because he figured that being typical ‘sick people food’, it’d soothe Felix’ sore throat but he hadn’t considered, just how little appetite the boy might have. Besides, the dancer felt in no mood to cook and he didn’t like the canned soups Seungmin kept on hand at their dorm, so while he had promised Chan that he’d eat something, it was unlikely going to be soup. Resting his head against the edge of the bathtub, Felix closed his eyes and took a deep breath, relieved that it slowly got easier. His nose was running a little now but he didn’t mind, at least his sinuses were clearing up. At first, the warmth of the water had felt odd and uncomfortable against his skin, sensitive from the fever, but it grew comfortable as he got used to it and his muscles finally relaxed.

Felix had a hard time not accidentally falling asleep in the tub because he knew that was dangerous but it was so comfy that it made him drowsy. The only thing the bath hadn’t improved in the slightest, was the bothersome headache still thumping behind his temples. Maybe some painkillers didn’t sound too bad but what could he possibly convince himself to eat. Anything he could think of would hurt his throat and it didn’t seem worth the pain. Ugh, he’d also have to get out of the tub if he wanted to get food and medicine. He should’ve thought this through earlier. No way he had the energy to get out now.

Turns out, he did find the energy somewhere in him but only because something had loosened in his chest and he kept coughing. A drink suddenly sounded far better than staying in the warm water for longer. Bundled up in a thick sweater, with a pair of fuzzy socks on his feet, Felix shuffled to the kitchen and poured himself some water. Sipping it slowly, he went through the different cabinets and drawers in search of something quick but relatively pain free to eat. Nothing looked appealing at all, so he grumpily checked the fridge and perked up when he reached for the freezer. If the Aussie remembered correctly, they still had some ice cream. That’d be smooth and the cold would numb the pain in his throat, so it had to be perfect right?

It was almost perfect. Smiling happily because they indeed had some ice cream, Felix grabbed a spoon and made his way over to the couch, already shuddering because the bowl was so cold in his hands. Well, one more instance in which he was glad that they always kept a fluffy blanket draped over the back of the couch. Placing his ice cream onto the coffee table, Felix wrapped himself in his fluffy blanket and huddled on the couch before he continued eating.

Worried about his dongsaeng, Chan decided to accompany Seungmin home after their schedule concluded, so they could check on Felix together. The dancer had taken his medication after he finished his scoop of ice cream and even managed to take a little nap once it kicked in. Now that it was wearing off though, Felix had to consider his options. There was one small serving of ice cream left, so he could have that now but what then? He’d have to figure something out for the upcoming days because he doubted his throat would be any better by then. Possibly even worse if this cough kept tearing it up.

Deciding that his future self could worry about that, Felix pulled the fluffy blanket tighter around his shoulders and padded to the kitchen. He didn’t even bother to scoop the ice cream into a bowl this time. There was so little left, he could just eat it out of the tub. Once again, the first few bites sent shivers down his spine but he sighed in relief because it numbed the back of his throat a little, the oain temporarily forgotten. Just as Felix was finishing off the last bite of ice cream, Seungmin let Chan into the apartment and kicked off his shoes. Spotting the younger in the living room, Chan waved and smiled: “Hi there, Lixxie. How’re you feeling?” – “I’m okay”, Felix rasped, placing the empty container onto the coffee table before rubbing his arms to quell the chills. “Now, who decided ice cream is ‘sick people food’?”, the leader questioned, walking over to help the dancer fix the blanket. Glaring at his hyung, Felix snapped: “Shut it, Christopher! My throat’s killin’ me and this helped. We ran out though, so if anyone was willing to get me more tomorrow, that’d be highly appreciated.”

With the way Felix’ voice had given out towards the end, nobody doubted his statement and Seungmin volunteered to head to the mini-market and pick up some more ice cream. Chan took a seat next to Felix and pulled him into his arms to warm him up, softly explaining the arrangements he had been able to make to his schedule, so he’d get the time to rest and recover. He felt a little guilty for teasing the younger about his meal choice because he still remembered how inflamed his own throat had been not even two weeks ago. That didn’t mean that he didn’t cherish Seungmin for also bringing home a few bags of frozen fruit for Felix to blend into smoothies as it would no doubt be the better alternative long-term if they wanted their friend to get the vitamins he’d need.

With how feverish Felix still was after taking his dose of medicine, it was apparent that he’d have an early bedtime. Chan wasn’t too concerned about catching the dancer’s cold after just having gotten over it himself, so he didn’t hesitate to climb into his dongsaeng’s bed after him. Just one of those sad puppy-eye looks was enough to make the leader go all mushy and Felix knew it. Obviously, he’d use that to his advantage if it meant someone would hold him through the chills and confusingly vivid fever dreams.

[mysteriouslyjovialcolor]

China 2018

-Ferrari, Mercedes, Red Bull lockout

-Nico (from the last few races I’ve watched) has been pretty consistent in qualifying top ten. I can’t believe he’s never made podium

-Oh wow Sebastian just sped ahead like he was thrown from a sling shot

-Kimi and Lewis both losing positions because of that

-Max gained because of that though, Nico too

-“Did you see how many places we lost because of Sergio right now? It’s unbelievable” The girls are fighting again

-Haas implementing team orders for this race was not on my Bingo card (I’ll take it though, cause Kevin is higher now)

-“Do we think that Kimi Raikonnen is kind of sleep-walking Lewis Hamilton into a slower pace?”

-Nico casually going past Charles. The Renault looks like they were actually good this season

-✨Red Bull double stack ✨

-That was actually so hot

-“Box, box, box, box, do the opposite to Raikonnen” I love pit stop games

-“The one team that aren’t reacting is Ferrari” Why is it always them

-“Bottas gets past Vettel, the undercut worked!” That was so close, Mercedes really did a great job

-Lewis stuck in a Red Bull sandwich

-Nico on the other hand picking off cars one by one and Carlos right behind him

-Charles?? Why is he p20??

-I’m surprised the Force Indias are still out of the points

-The top three now less than a second away from each other

-Andd Valterri has made his move! He’s gone past Kimi and now so has Sebastian!

-Max p3 now, after Kimi pit

-“Charles was expected to be the wonder boy wasn’t he” Excuse me?? I don’t care that he’s p20- you shall not talk smack about him!

-Eeh Pierre running into his teammate

-Fortunately not something that needed a safety car though

-Never mind, I was wrong, there is a safety car

-Another Red Bull double stack!!

-“Red Bull definitely not sleeping on that pit wall”

-Renault double stack as well

-Somehow Nico didn’t lose out track position because of that, but Carlos did :/

-“We haven’t had a retirement so far” These guys about to jinx it

-“Is it just me or have I got a bunch of cars that have new tires behind me” Oh Lewis

-“And the two Force Indias almost touch” I’m surprised they haven’t already

-Let’s go Daniel!!!!

-Oh shit Max fell behind Danny, still covering off Kimi though

-Daniel!!!!!

-“If he’s going to do this, he might as well be pulling rabbits out of his hat. That was magic from Daniel Ricciardo” 👏👏👏

-“Alright next one is Vettel, let’s get him” That’s a man on a mission now

-Woah!! Max getting past Lewis too!! No falling back this time!!

-Who lit the fire under Daniel’s car?? Ohmygodd has he come alive towards the last few laps of this race!!

-“Well done mate, easy pickings” GP is so chill

-Oh no! Max hit Seb! GP spoke too soon!!

-Aaaaah that was so hotttt from Nico!!!!

-Daniel leading!!!

-“Don’t give up, you can pass Hulkenburg” What if I actually don’t want him to though

-10s penalty for Max. This has happened to me three times in a row now. Someone make it stop

-Ah Max and Lewis wheel to wheel! That one was fun!

-“He can’t just run me off the track like that” Sebastian’s day going from bad to worse because Alonso decided to be a menace

-Nico stays p6 though!!

-Daniel “Race Winner” Ricciardo!!!

-“Absolutely clinical moves. Cutthroat. Scary” haha

-Go Aussie babyyy

[mrs-toohot]

Ryder, decoded

So the THTH writers apparently googled “Australian slang” and went copy/paste into his dialogue with absolutely no concept of what any of it means or how commonly it’s used.

So, as your resident Australian, I’m going to translate for you.

Below, you’ll find the examples I found so far, a translation, and a rating out of ten for how commonly it’s used / how accurate the slang is.

Disclaimer: I am born and raised Aussie. My ancestors were convicts. And while I do live in a major city, I grew up in the most country of country towns; population 847. So I am fluent in Aussie.

So without further ado:

Buggers.

If you look up the word buggers you’ll find it’s short for buggery which is the act of engaging in anal sex. But it’s not really used that way any more. I would never use “sexy buggers” that’s kinda weird. It’s only ever used these days as a light-hearted term, such as “cheeky bugger”(usually said with a hair ruffle). Alternatively, you can say someone’s “playing silly buggers” which means they’re messing around/being silly.

Accuracy of usage: 6/10

True-blue.

I see this and I think of this song which I believe they may have played at Steve Irwin’s funeral. It’s basically the same as “proper” or “right” for the Brits. Interchange with “verifiable”. Is entirely a stereotype and wouldn’t even be used ironically these days. In its place, we would use “fuckin’”. The only time this word is used is when you’re describing someone as “he’s a true-blue Aussie battler” (he’s very Australian)

Accuracy of usage: 1/10

Sheilas & blokes.

No. Absolutely not. Sheilas 🤢 is a way of describing a group of girls, but it’s very outdated. You could still call a guy a bloke, but it’s not interchangeable with “guy”. A bloke is specifically very traditionally Aussie & masculine, and you’d almost be more likely to use it as an adjective (I.e. “he’s a bit blokey”). I’ll be honest, you want someone who’s “blokey”, think “Gary from LITG”.

Accuracy of usage: 1/10 and 4/10 respectively

Ripper

Means ‘great’. And unless it’s in relation to specifically calling someone else a ‘ripper legend’ (shortened to ‘ripper ledge’) it’s not used commonly whatsoever.

Accuracy of usage: 2/10

Bonzer

No. Absolutely not. Never in a million years would bonzer be used today. It also means ‘great’ but this can’t even be used ironically. Even in the deep dark depths of country western NSW, using this word will get you looked at weird.

Accuracy of usage: -10/10

Crikey

Sorry to disappoint, but this one’s also a no. It means essentially “wow”. The only time we’d use this is to amuse internationals. We associate this word with ol’ mate Steve as much as you do.

RIP buddy 🪦

Accuracy of usage: 2/10

Fair dinkum & arvo

You’d ask if something was ‘fair dinkum’ if you were questioning if the aforementioned statement was true, or you were trying to figure out if someone was for real. “I’m Spider-Man”, “oh, fair dinkum?” It is… not common. Very outdated and only your countriest of the country boys would use it (and only if they’re 60+)

Now- ARVO- this is a different story. I use arvo EVERY DAY. It is short for afternoon and I don’t remember the last time I used the full word. “What’re you doin s’arvo?” Absolutely used every single day.

Accuracy of usage: 3/10 and 10/10

Have a squiz and take a gander

Both mean the same thing: take a look. Do not ask me where they come from but welcome to Australia. I have definitely said “give us a squiz” or “I’ll take a squiz” lol. The latter is still said but only by much older people. A funnier version ( only said ironically) is ‘have a captain cook’ (rhyming slang for ‘have a look’)

Accuracy of usage: 9/10 and 7/10

Have a yarn

Means ‘have a chat’, ‘talk’, or ‘shooting the shit’. This is actually really commonly used by indigenous Australians, and ‘yarning’ culture is really crucial and involves a cuppa tea 😁 I liked seeing this one pop up.

Accuracy of usage: 10/10

Possible upcoming slang:

Yeah, nah: No

Nah, yeah: Yes

Have a root: Sex

Pull your head in: Calm down, get it together, wisen up

Ta: thank you

Sweet as: sounds good

Righto/Righteo: alright

No worries: not a problem, that’s okay. Often said in conjunction with ‘she’ll be right’

No wukkas: no worries, short for “no wukkin furries” which is an intentional mispronunciation of “no fuckin’ worries”.

Bloody oath: bloody hell/Fuckin’ hell

Ocker/yobbo: super Aussie guy, see “bloke”. Specifically very country.

Drongo: forbidden phrase. Never used ever. Means an idiot/dork. If they use this I quit.

Flamin’ galah: said ironically, very funny. Said seriously, no.

Dropkick: super common. Similar to derro or deadshit. A loser, someone who is going nowhere in life.

Derro/deadshit: derro is short for derelict. Someone who bums cigarettes at the train station. Wears thongs (flipflops) everywhere even in winter.

Bum: (verb) to bum sth: to beg for/ ask for / grift for. “Can I bum a smoke off ya” (often followed by “I’ll pay you back”)

Let’s see what gems they come out with this week, shall we?

[blubushie]

Why do you like Mick Taylor?

Aussie

He's fucking funny. Complete larrikin. If he had a stand-up show I'd watch it.

Charismatic when he wants to be.

Pig shooter. I am also a pig shooter.

He's fucking funny (and he hates Kiwis!)

He lives out bush. We're so underrepresented in Aussie media (except for Croc Dundee who is on my level of bushman) so any time we get to see Rural Aussie In The Outback I go wild.

John Jarrat is a (big) ripper and he's great. Love him.

I've met many men in my day who are basically Mick Taylor, mannerisms and all, just minus the homicide.

I love to hate Taylor for how much of a bastard he is.

Taylor is fucking terrifying as an Aussie.

It's not something that's easily explained to people who aren't Australian, but especially rural Aussies, everyone knows a Mick Taylor. He's an incredibly effective villain because everyone back of Bourke knows a bloke Taylor's age who dresses like him, and talks like him, and might crack a disparaging joke now and then, and isn't exactly politically correct, but he's down to earth and he'll never hesitate to offer help when it's needed. Everyone knows a bloke like Taylor whose blood is worth bottling. And for us, we're fucked out there without your neighbours and good samaritans to help you. If something goes wrong and you're too far out, it might be days to weeks until someone comes along and finds you. And because Taylor screams familiar to us, every Aussie who watches Wolf Creek wants to trust Taylor the same way you'd trust your neighbours and your mates. You meet a Taylor every day. Your neighbour is a Taylor. Your best mate is a Taylor. Your father is a Taylor (Mick Taylor's mannerisms and manner of speaking were actually inspired by John Jarrat's father). Everyone knows, and trusts, their local Mick Taylor.

So when that trust of such a familiar image is betrayed and revealed to be a mask, under which incomprehensible sadism and cruelty lies? When the man you, as an Australian audience, would trust with your life, is revealed to be a sadistic killer who wants to see you in agony? When the familiar face of your father, or brother, or best mate is turned into something monstrous but still familiar? That is FUCKING TERRIFYING to your audience.

I love Mick Taylor because he's one of the best horror villains ever put to screen. Because he is realistic, and a product of his origin, and if you saw him or interacted with him at a pub you'd like him because he's just that personable, and five hours later he'll have you strung up to be fed alive to his dogs because you made the mistake of trusting him.

Mick Taylor is the scariest fucking villain out there for an Aussie, and I adore him because of it.

[sitizelter]

🩵Sky Full of Stars🩵

Loscar ♡ Pt.1

Pt. 1 out of idk how many parts. Let's hope I have enough mental capacity to make this a (long) series.

╰──────── ♡⁀➷ ────────╮

The 2023 season had ended a few weeks ago, and winter break had started. It's a long gap from November to March - and it always bugs Oscar.

Oscar flew back to Melbourne, while Logan's back in Florida. 15 hours timezone difference and a 15,000 km distance between the two countries.

╰──────── ♡⁀➷ ────────╮

Logan was sitting by his balcony, watching the sunset as he scrolled through his phone. Suddenly, his phone began to ring.

'Oscar', It showed at the top of his screen. Logan huffed and clicked on the notification.

"Loges!!" He's greeted by a brown-haired aussie, looks like the other was in his room.

"Oscar! This better be good, man, I'm tryna relax here!" Logan says with a laugh as he answers the call. It's always great seeing his stupid face. Even though it's the off-season, the aussie's probably bored out of his mind already in Melbourne while the sun is still out shining in Florida.

"What's up, mate? Miss me that much already?" He teases, leaning back in his lounger by the balcony. The view of the ocean is beautiful as the sun dips low on the horizon.

"Pfft, can't let your best mate give you a 'good morning' call every once in a while?" Oscar spoke as he set his phone down on his table.

"Oh right, you're in Florida. More like a 'good evening' call then?" He added on as he looked at himself in the mirror, adjusting his hair. Typical Oscar, always worried about his hair even on a casual video call.

"Yeah yeah, 'morning' for you, 'evening' for me," Logan replies with a smile.

"So what's really going on then? I know you too well, mate, you never call just to say hi. Missing the track already?" Logan takes a sip of water as he watches the colors of the sunset glowing off the ocean waves. Being back home is nice, but he does miss having Oscar around to keep him entertained during the long off weeks.

Oscar merely hummed at Logan's question, finally finishing up on his hair. A moment passes before he answers. "Ok, yeah, maybe I do miss yo- it. Miss it." He mutters out, taking the phone in his hand again.

Logan raises an eyebrow at Oscar's slight slip up. It's not like him to be unsure of what he's saying.

"Miss me, or miss it? There's a difference, mate." The american grins, hoping to get a rise out of him. "C'mon, out with it. You know you love having me around really."

"Oh, shut up." Oscar chuckles as he looks away from the screen for a second.

Hoping to divert the topic from whatever's really on his mind, Logan asks more lightheartedly, "So when are you coming to visit then, if you miss me - er, us - so much? I'm sure we can find some way for you to entertain yourself down here in Florida for a week or two over the break."

"Not sure when I can visit, to be honest. My dad wants me to stay around to help him with his warehouse, and I might be going back to MTC for some admin stuff." Oscar sighs out as he leans back against his chair.

"Aww, that's too bad." Logan tries to hide his disappointment at the news Oscar won't be able to visit. Winter break goes by slowly enough as it is.

An idea occurs to him. "What if I came to Melbourne then instead? I'm sure your dad could spare you for a weekend. You could show me around." Logan flashes Oscar a smile, hoping the prospect of having him as a guest might help change his dad's mind. Or at least give Oscar something to look forward to during his seemingly boring warehouse duties.

"C'mon, it'll be fun." Logan adds on with a whiny tone

"Pretty sure my mom won't mind you coming over. I mean, you're technically a special guest to the Piastri household already." Oscar spoke, snickering a bit.

"Hey, what can I say, your mom loves me," The other replies with a wink. Her cooking is definitely another bonus of visiting Melbourne.

Oscar sees the backdrop of Logan's screen getting darker.

"Are the stars visible tonight?" The aussie asks, his voice suddenly dropping an octane lower. Logan leans back to take a look.

"Yeah, you can start to see some of the brighter ones coming out," He tells Oscar.

There's a soothing quality to their evenings calls, watching the same stars and sunsets even from so far apart. Logan finds himself relaxing further into his lounger.

"It's cooler here too, so the view is really clear. I'll have to send you some photos later." An idea comes to him. "Maybe we could stargaze together when I visit. Find some good spots outside the city where it's really dark."

Oscar huffs out a soft laugh. "We can sit around the parking lot we used to go to when we were younger. The scenery there is really pretty, especially when the sun's down." Oscar speaks, his voice as if he was reminiscing about something - memories when the both of them were younger, more carefree.

A warm feeling comes over Logan as he remembers those nights with Oscar from their younger days. Sneaking out after dark to the empty parking lot, marveling at the sea of stars above with not another soul in sight.

It was there they first learned what truly mattered - their dreams, their friendship, the vastness of what laid beyond their sleepy suburb. Logan glances up at the sky, wondering if the same patterns have shifted across the heavens since those times.

"That parking lot... what I wouldn't give to see it with you again, mate." The american says softly. More than the view of stars, it's the company he cherishes most from those memories. "Just you, me, and infinity above. It's a date then, when I come visit. We'll watch the night sky like we used to."

The aussie's eyes glimmered as he looked at Logan from behind the screen. He smiled.

"Yeah, okay." He muttered.

"It's a date."

Logan returns Oscar's smile softly, strangely touched by his reply. Anticipation stirs within him at the promise of their date beneath the night skies, as if no time has passed at all.

"It's a date," Logan repeats quietly to himself with satisfaction.

Then, Oscar's phone beeped.

"Ah, shit. My phone's low on batt, call me when you wake up?" Oscar asks, you could see him scrambling around for his charger.

Logan shakes his head in amusement. He can't help but smile at his familiar antics. "Better go charge up then. Talk to you tomorrow, mate."

"Have a good rest of your day. Miss you."

Logan ends the call with a lingering sensation of fondness and warmth. Leaning back again, his eyes find the first evening stars appearing as if guided by memory. No doubt this visit to Melbourne will be one to remember.

╰──────── ♡⁀➷ ────────╮

[gayeroticafiction]

Cocktail Italiano

A Gay Erotica Story

After four weeks travelling around Italy, we spent the last few days relaxing in Rome before flying back to Australia. My wife and I decided to take our adult kids on a trip, thinking it may be our last family holiday before they left home, and we had been having a great time. So much to see...and lots of hot guys at the beach or poolside for this straight-acting guy to check out.

Two nights before we flew out, I was feeling like seeing a bit of night life of Roma and remembered seeing a cool little cocktail bar about two or three blocks away from our hotel. The kids were hanging out with some other people their age, who they had met on the trip, and who were also stopped in Rome. It was getting to about 8.30pm and I had got ready to head out. The weather had been really warm while we were in Italy and the evening was quite balmy. I dressed in shorts and a linen shirt and slip on shoes. My wife was really tired and decided to have the night in and get some sleep. That was fine with me...happy to have a night on my own and do the things I'd like to do.

I went out onto the street and started walking to the cocktail bar. It was a busy night and there were lots of people out, enjoying the weather and the nightlife. I walked through the door to the quaint little building; an old, double story shop. It was busy, but not crazy. I found a small table and sat down. The waitress came over and took my order. I looked over to the bar and noticed the cocktail waiter. His firm arms bulging from his tight t-shirt, as he shook a cocktail. I ordered whatever was their most popular cocktail.

The waitress went over to the cocktail waiter, gave him the order and he looked my way. He was so sexy...those gorgeous Italian eyes just catching the light; his face almost in need of a shave, but enough hair to be really sexy!! He looked like he was well-built, but he was behind the bar, but I was keen to see the rest of him.

He made my cocktail, and the waitress brought it over. I offered to pay, but she told me it was on the house. I took the glass and lifted it to the cocktail waiter, who nodded in return. I drank it quickly, as it was very good. Standing up, I moved over to the bar and took a seat. The cocktail waiter was wearing an apron, but I could see he was most likely wearing shorts underneath. He walked over to me, and I noticed his name badge - Matteo. His name was so sexy!

"Bongiorno" he said politely.

"Bongiorno" I replied. "Thanks for the cocktail. It was amazing".

As we began to chat, and Matteo flirted with me, I felt my stomach start to turn and my heart flutter. I have had guys come onto me before and knew what it felt like. Maybe this time it would actually go somewhere!

"You are an Aussie?" he asked.

"Yeah mate" as we shook hands. "My name's Scott. We've just got a couple of nights in Rome before heading home. I saw this bar and was really keen to give it a go" I told him.

"We?" he asked. "You are travelling with others?"

"Yeah, my wife and kids." I replied.

He looked confused for a moment.

"So, you are married...but you want to have a good night tonight? he queried. "I have just the cocktail for you" he said, as he turned and started to prepare my drink.

Fuck...those shorts!!! Very short...very tight...ripped on the ass!!! God he had a nice ass. I felt my cock go instantly hard.

I stared at him as he shook the drink, poured it and brought it over to me. He leaned on the bar, as I sipped it.

"This is so good" I told him, as he smiled back at me.

He turned and walked over to the waitress, chatting with her as he removed his apron. I could tell that he had an amazing body, as his shorts and t-shirt were very tight. He clearly looked after himself.

Matteo headed over to a door and looked back at me, grabbing what seemed to be a pretty large cock in his shorts. That was my cue. I quickly gulped down the last of my cocktail and followed him out the door, trying to conceal my hard cock. He was at the top of the stairs as I approached them. I climbed the stairs and, as I entered the door to what seemed to be his apartment, he was there waiting for me. I closed the door behind me, and he walked up to me, placing his hand gently on my neck and pulling me into him. We began to kiss, his warm tongue sliding into my mouth as his right hand caressed the back of my neck and his left hand started to touch my groin.

I was completely lost now. This was a very new experience for me, but something I had wanted my entire life. My hands started to touch him, as he moved his hands to my shirt and undid the buttons. Taking my shirt off, he caressed my nipples and ran his hands over my chest and stomach. Fuck, I want this so bad! He undid my shorts and they dropped to the ground. My cock was the hardest I had ever experienced, and I knew that I was very wet in my trunks. Matteo slid my rod out and started to stroke it. I began to lose balance as more blood ran to my cock. I leant up against the wall and, as I did, shot a huge load over his shorts, legs and the floor.

"Oh fuck," I exclaimed..."I am so sorry. I have never been with a guy and you have got me so fucking horny"

"All good...I'm sure there will be more" he said calmly, as he stood back and removed his tight t-shirt, dropping it onto my load on the floor.

Matteo took me by the hand and lead me to his bed, guiding me to sit down. He moved in close to me and I undid the buttons on his shorts. As they opened, I could tell he liked to go commando, his pubic hair inviting me to taste what I had wanted forever!

I moved my face in closer and my nose touched his pubes. I could smell him...and it was turning me on! I slid his shorts down and his hard, nine-inch cock stood to attention. Playing hard to get, Matteo dropped to his knees and, taking my cock in his hand, started to stroke it, pulling my foreskin back more and more each time!

With my wet knob completely exposed, he ran his tongue slowly around the rim as I groaned.

"Does your wife do this?" he asked with a cheeky grin.

I shook my head. She had never actually pulled my foreskin back and probably only sucked me every couple of months.

He moved his tongue to the tip of my knob, gently running it over the very tip. I really wanted to hang onto my load this time, but didn't know how long I could. With his tongue on my knob, he slid my foreskin back over it and began to run his tongue around inside my skin. I fell back and grabbed the sheets.

"Oh fuck...I'm cumming" I screamed as he slammed his mouth down over my dick, taking my load right down his throat!

He pushed me back further onto the bed and pushed my legs back, lifting my ass up. He pushed his body in underneath me and grabbed my ass cheeks with both hands. Prying my fuck hole open with his thumbs, he dribbled my cum into my tight hole and then moved his face down into me and began to toy my rim with his tongue.

"Oh fuck!!!" I exclaimed loudly as I began to moan more and more.

My body was now his. I had nothing left in me and I let him do what he wanted to me.

Licking me deeper and deeper, he knew what I really needed...his nine-inch cock deep inside me. He wanted it too! Moving his body out from underneath me, my back went down onto the bed. Matteo pushed my legs back again and, knowing where he was going, I grabbed myself behind the knees. He rubbed his wet knob against my prepped hole, and I nearly lost it again.

Feeling a cock against my hole for the first time was the best thing I had ever experienced. As he slowly slid it in, deeper and deeper, I was in ecstasy. My eyes rolled back in my head as his cock rubbed my prostate. He fucked me slowly for what seemed like an eternity, and it was the most amazing thing I had ever felt.

Lowering my legs, he lay his body down on top of mine, as I then wrapped my legs around him. He began to kiss me and caress my body with his strong hands as he made love to me.

I could take this all night, I thought to myself. The feeling of his large cock inside me; his warm, strong hands all over my naked body; his mouth kissing my neck and shoulders; his tongue in my mouth. I didn't want him to stop.

With his body motion changing, and the pace of his thrust increasing, I could only assume he was about to orgasm and cum deep inside me.

He started to breath heavier and moan louder...

"Cazzo, sto venendo"! he yelled out and I felt the most amazing sense deep inside me.

His massive load injected deep inside my bowel, and the warmth of his semen filled my entire body. He looked me in the eye, both of us breathing heavily.

"My God, that was so amazing!" I exclaimed. "Fuck me again".

With that, he began to make love to me again...and again...and again. I lay there the entire night, as Matteo did to me whatever he wanted...whatever I needed! The more he fucked me, the more of his semen dripped from my man cunt and onto the bed. I don't know when we finished having sex, but we must have both dropped from complete exhaustion.

______________________________________________________________

A cool breeze blew across the bed, as the sun filtered through the rustling curtains. I woke, not realizing where I was, but pleasantly surprised at the gorgeous site in the bed next to me.

"Fuck" I thought to myself..."I stayed out all night". Panicked thoughts started to run through my head.

My thoughts were quickly overshadowed by the site of the hot, naked Italian guy sleeping next to me. I turned to him and ran my fingers gently down his hairy, muscular chest toward the sheet that was covering his waist. Slowly lifting the sheet back, the amazing cock that satisfied me all night lay there across his body; still impressive, whilst not even erect! I then began to notice the throbbing feeling inside my ass from being pounded all night.

I ran my finger along his shaft; slowly, back and forth, from his pubes to his head. His amazing cock started to stir, as did Matteo. He moaned as his cock became harder, and I moved into a position to take him in my mouth. I never had the chance last night, and I was so eager.

As I moved in closer, I could smell the aroma of sex on him. He fucked me so much; the smell of semen and ass were ever-present...and a complete turn-on!

Moving my head in closer, I started to run my tongue along his shaft, making Matteo stir, and I felt his hand run from my ass, up my back, to my head. He was fully erect now and I took him in my mouth. Matteo was clearly well practiced at being with guys, and I was able to suck him for ages before he blew his load in my mouth.

I swallowed every last drop.

He pulled my body over on top of his and I mounted his face, his tongue pushing deep inside my hole. I pulled his legs back and, grabbing his amazing ass cheeks, opened his hole and went for it, getting my face right into his hairy man cunt. Fuck, he smelt so good...and tasted even better!!

As we enjoyed tasting each other, there was a loud thump at the door downstairs. It sounded urgent, so I rolled off of Matteo and he went to the open balcony doors, completely naked and as hard as a rock.

"Bongiorno" Matteo called out.

...and then I heard a very familiar voice...

"I am looking for an Australian man, about 50, tall, well-built, greying hair..."

"Aren't we all?" replied Matteo, jokingly.

I liked the joke, but I was really nervous at the same time.

My son continued..."apparently he came here to have a few drinks last night, but he didn't return to the hotel. Do you think you might have seen him?"

"No, I don't recall serving an Australian man, but I will ask my staff today. But if you need a good time...come and see me!" Matteo said, winking at my son.

"Any other time I would, I mean, fuck, you're hot, but not today. Ciao" and he walked off.

Damn...my son is actually gay too!!! FUCK!!!

Matteo turned back to the bed, where I lay there on my back, naked and still hard. He climbed over the top of me and slid his ass down on top of my hard cock. As he moved up and down on me, I knew this was going to be over quickly.

I groaned...louder and louder...

"Ohhhh....fuck...I'm cumming," I cried out as I unloaded in his hot ass.

He lay down on top of me, my cock still inside of him, and we kissed.

"So, your son is gay too?" he asked.

"It seems so" I replied. "I'd better go, they are obviously worried about me. They've probably gone to the police already".

Matteo rolled off of me and I got up from the bed and found my clothes...well...most of them. I ended up going commando, as I could not find my trunks. I bent down to the bed and kissed Matteo goodbye.

"I had a great night" I said. "I wish it could have been longer".

"It could be" he replied, as he held me tight.

"I must go". And I slipped out of his hold, our hands being the last parts to touch.

I closed the door behind me and walked, but not back to the hotel. I didn't know what to do. I am gay! I have lived a lie my entire life. I headed to the river and sat down on a bench to think about what I needed to do next.

I messaged my wife to meet me at the river. When she arrived, I sat her down and told her everything. It's all I could do. I also told her that I could not return to Australia with the family and that I was going to stay in Italy.

She stood up and slapped me across the face and, looking me in the eyes, said that I needed to be the one to tell the kids, and she walked off.

With my face in my hands, I sat there crying, unsure if I had done the right thing or not. I grabbed my phone from my pocket and, looking at the screen, saw that Matteo had messaged me. I could not remember giving him my number, but I must have.

Along with a picture of him laying in bed in his ripped denim shorts, he wrote:

I have never been with a guy like you and loved every bit about last night. I want that to last forever. I will miss you. xx

As I sat there thinking about my life and what I had actually done, I found myself texting him back:

I am down by the river. Haven't gone to the Hotel. I don't know what to do.

And I left it at that, as I just sat there, face in my hands and sobbing.

I heard the sound of running feet, but did not look up. They seemed to stop near me, then I heard a familiar voice:

"Forza tesoro, andiamo a casa!" he said.

I looked up, and there was Matteo, looking hot as ever in his skinny jeans, one hand on his crotch, that other hand out for me. I reached for his hand and looked at him, unsure about what he said to me.

"Come on honey, let's go home" he said as he smiled at me.

I got up and he pulled me into his arms. We kissed passionately, our tongues deep inside each other's mouths.

I could not wait to spend every day with this man.

An original fictional, gay erotica story by @soyouthinkimstraight, @gayeroticafiction, NW,2023

All images have been removed due to Tumblr flagging, but were from the personal collection of @matteo-jeanslover and have been used by permission.

@matteo-jeanslover

[not-poignant]

oh god im having a moment. this may seem obvious but…i know that utr is set in australia…theres more than a few references….to australia.. and ….australian things..but i only now realised that means everyone has an australian accent omg 😭😭😭😭(me to my brain: “why didnt you tell me” my brain back: “girl are you forreal”) idk why this is so surprising to me…im slow. so all the conversations that happened…. happened with an aussie accent….temsen…gary….gwyn 😭 i know faber has more of a british accent right? idk why i remembered that but then didn’t think about calebs accent… this is amazing, its also embarrassing for me but i am protected by the veil of online anonymity so im just rolling on my couch going through past conversations in the stories re-imagining them. wait that means YOU also have an australian accent!! i LOVE australian accent!!!! almost as much as kiwi but then again i hear that one even less than aussie accents… 😂 oke have a good sunday..or wait what time is it over there?! have a good time from 9pm germany 🇩🇪 cheers mate

Ahaha, this was so great to get

Okay so firstly, I think it's fairly universal that most of us don't think of ourselves as having accents, so unless a character has a very distinct accent, I don't think of their accents at all. For that reason, I also have zero problems when people just imagine the accent that is normal to them!

Secondly, what most people know as the Australian accent is very particular to certain parts of Australia. Most people haven't heard a Perth accent, which is a lot milder overall than say, a Queensland accent. And class really influences how people talk. Like, most of these people aren't saying 'mate' for a reason, it's just not part of their daily language. So...in that sense, it wouldn't be accurate to imagine a standard television Australian accent either. It's kind of jokey, in the same way that people put on really overdone German or Russian accents, you know it's not always reflective of reality.

I love Kiwi accents too btw, so good. :D Early Flight of the Conchords forever!

But, yes, they are in Australia and they do have...Australian accents. Kadek's probably one of the most 'ocker', Faber is one of the fanciest speakers (as is Flitmouse, though he picked up his accent out of choice lol), though Gary's up there too because he came from a very educated and relatively upper class family (as is Efnisien, when he can stop swearing for five seconds!)

Characters who have a more standard Australian accent would be Janusz, Caleb, Nate, Kadek and I would say Anton's about in the middle.

But, again, if it's just easier and more comfortable to imagine whatever your internal 'generic accent' is - imagine that! For me that's actually like... a neutral English accent, for I think most people it's American! I don't even think my neutral accent is Australian, lmao, because I'm influenced by coming from a family of immigrants (Dutch + English + Russian) and watching a lot of TV growing up of which the majority wasn't Australian, and of course thinking of my own accent as just 'neutral' which it absolutely isn't.

Accents are weird!

[charlesandmartine]

Thursday 28th November 2024

Magnetic Island has a notable inhabitant; the cuddly koala, so we made it our task today to go looking for one. We had read where we might be successful in tracking down said arboreal herbivorous marsupial. The base for our quest was a visit to the Forts, a WW2 site built in 1943 to take French 155 mm M3 gun emplacements to protect Townsville and the harbour. Townsville was a strategic, major supply depot and departure point for troop movement. It might appear that despite the perceived need to protect this site from the Japanese, these guns were not used in anger. The construction of this complex was a fantastic engineering achievement; a perception perhaps overlooked simply because the effort required to reach them works as a distraction. To enjoy the Forts, we climbed 545 ft to see what those gunners in 1943 would have seen; beautiful vistas across to the mainland, harbour, and islands. It may have been difficult to maintain concentration on the task at hand when such distractions were all around.

On the way up the steep path, we became aware of activity to our right. A practice here is that if a koala is spotted, an arrow constructed with sticks on the ground points the way to it. And we were quite right to investigate because following the arrow, there, some 3 metres up, tucked into a cleft of a tree, was a very cuddly grey koala, adopting the usual pose, asleep. Koalas have all they need around them, security in height above ground and food by way of leaves. What they lack is the use of an alarm clock, without which they sleep between 18 and 22 hours a day. That doesn't leave a great time to do all those other things a koala needs to do such as finding a mate. This one, most admired and photographed, so much so that after a big stretch and a yawn, he moved further up the tree.

We returned to base, with Martine favouring a full test of the plunge pool facility we have in the back garden. Much excitement was coming from our neighbours this afternoon. Tuesdays and Thursdays are big days in the calendar of the Magnetic Island Bowls Club, and following in the traditions set by his eminence Sir Francis Drake, the old bowls were deployed this afternoon for a game on the lawn. And very sedate a game of lawn bowls it was too. Not exactly in white, but at least it wasn't barefoot. Then, with respect to our own calendar, it was time to take the little creatures beer across to the beach for afternoon tiffin. Theoretically, this is an illegal act because there is a sign up saying no alcohol is allowed on the beach. But hey, Aussies don't appear to take a lot of notice of such rules. This is such a beautiful island, and being able to sit on the sands, as the sun goes down, the waves lapping almost at your feet, having a little drink and nibbles in such a warm enveloping atmosphere is simply magical.

[scratchybongvt]

MASCOTS READ MEAN TWEETS! (Sidemascots 1.13)

Stay tuned for a poll at the end!

Starring…

THE SIDEMASCOTS!

Vinicius: Season 1!

DISCLAIMER: None of the tweets are sent by real people, nor do they reflect the author’s opinion on each mascot. No offense to anyone intended.

Vinicius: “How does it feel to not work for Divertidos por Natureza for a long time?” Well, I was on multiple rehabs during the past month, and I was also busy working for the Sidemascots now! What? “Just a friendly reminder that the Carioca sisters exist and do breathe.” Oh, haha.

Sumi: “How does it feel to be the only surviving member of the Miga-Quatchi-Sumi trio”?! How does it feel to see ME survive?!

Miraitowa: -_- (The tweet he’s reading is “Default Olympic mascot”, classic.)

Burke: “Can we just appreciate the fact that he’s the only non-mascot to be in the Sidemascots?” Hey, I’m the unofficial mascot of Atlanta United! Oh, wait a minute, “Atlanta United?! Good luck beating Inter Miami, eh?!”, Hey, I’m also a fan of Messi!

Wenlock: “You’re named after a town in Shropshire, but promoted London?! Thin ice, whoever you are.” Hey, Olympic mascots don’t need to promote the host city! Also, I’m tirelessly trying to improve tourism in Much Wenlock! Just you wait!

Borobi: “Am I allowed to talk about your indigenous origins?” No mate! “How about I speak in Yugambeh”, oh haha.

Tina: “How does it feel to be an AC Milan fan for a week”, every day I think of the Inter Milan ultras holding large missiles in their hands, I’m scared.

Honohon: “Did you meet Uzumin? He’s so cute, cry emoji, cry emoji, cry emoji.”

Uzumin: Mina-san, konichiwa!

Honohon: Is that you?

Uzumin: It’s me! Let’s be friends!

Honohon: Oh, um… okay.

Uzumin: YAAAAAAAAAY!

Vinicius: THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE IN THE SIDEMASCOTS… YET!

Miraitowa: -_- (Another “default Olympic mascot” tweet)

Burke: “How many Miraitowas are there in this world?” Let me guess. “Two.” Oh haha.

Wenlock: “QUICK! BEFORE CRACKHEAD KNOWS THIS! IN SIDEMASCOTS 1.9 YOU GUYS-“

(@crackheadfromsainsburys shoots a laser beam on Wenlock’s head)

Crackhead: *gasps* Wenlock, are you okay?! Oh no…

Sumi: “Sumi, it’s Mukmuk, Miga’s dying. Help.” :/

Burke: “Atlanta United? So support a proper club!” I STAND BY THE GREAT CITY OF ATLANTA, GEORGIA! What? “Go to the real Georgia in Europe, dumbass”. Well yeah, but… but… LONG LIVE ATLANTA!

Vinicius: “You’re named after Vinicius de Moraes? I thought it was Vinicius Jr.! Get it?” Well, I do respect him a lot. That musician of course.

Tina: “Did you know that one of the Flos is going to cover Aladdin Sane?” What?

Sumi: It’s a David Bowie album.

Tina: Ohhhh… what?

Sumi: He’s a lad insane.

Tina: What the heck are you talking about-

Borobi: Scroll, scroll, scroll… Oh, finally, the one not about my indigenous origins! “Can anyone tell me how the AFL works?” Finally! It’s basically- wait… “I only know that the Suns are shit. Hahahahaha.”

Burke: Don’t worry, Borobi, it’s okay if your boyhood club receives some “rude comments”

Borobi: Thanks, mate.

Burke: Though it’s going to take some time to realize that Aussie rules aren’t popular in every other country, ha.

Borobi: OH COME ON MATE!

Sumi: “American black bear with flappy hands?! Are you drinking too much Red Bull?!” Well, I’ve seen someone who drank Red Bull a lot. It’s just that I don’t remember…

(@crackheadfromsainsburys shoots a laser beam on Sumi’s head)

Crackhead: SHUT. UP.

Burke: “Miami 2 Atlanta 1? Oh no, the best team won.” Suarez’ on fire, my defense is terrified!

Borobi: “1 matchday in and you got COOKED by Auckland?! It’s like a baby wrestled an adult!” Look, sometimes I wish I could return to the Gold Coast United days mate. I’m loyal to the Gold Coast.

Vinicius: WHAT?! SUMI’S DEAD?

Crackhead: He’s not dead, just in a coma.

Vinicius: (sobs)

Crackhead: Look, I’m-

(Vinicius chokes Crackhead)

Vinicius: HOW DARE YOU!

Uzumin: Don’t be koi – Let’s swim against the current. (Badum tsss)

Honohon: …

Uzumin: Get it? Koi? As in koi fish?

Rockstar Flo: There’s a starman, waiting in the sky…

Tina: Is that Aladdin Sane?

Rockstar Flo: No, it’s Ziggy Stardust.

Tina: What?

Rockstar Flo: You’re too young to understand Bowie darling.

Tina: But I’m fifteen-

Borobi: “Did anyone see the Gold Coast Titans? They’ve been missing from the finals mate.” Look, sometimes, I want to go- ohhhhhhh… WELL, HOW DARE YOU MATE!           

Vinicius: Look at what you've done to your idol!

Crackhead: (gasps) I forgot…

Vinicius: Did you read “The Catcher in the Rye”?

Crackhead: NO! (sobs) I’M A MONSTER! (runs out of the studio) A MONSTER!

Miraitowa: Right, all of the tweets you guys sent to me are all about me being a default Olympic mascot. I QUIT!

(Vinicius puts on the defibrillator onto Sumi’s chest)

Vinicius: CLEAR!

Sumi: GAH! WHAT HAPPENED!

Vinicius: We were filming a Sidemascots episode and you collapsed.

Sumi: Ack, my heart hurts.

Vinicius: You deserve a rest buddy.

Uzumin: Hey!

Honohon: What?!

Uzumin: Water you up to today?

Honohon: …

Uzumin: Get it? I was meant to “What are you up to today?” But instead, I say “Water you up to today?”

Honohon: You’re the worst.

Uzumin: PLEASE, DON’T LEAVE ME HONOHON!

Someity: I’ve deleted all of the mean tweets!

Vinicius: WHAT?!

Sumi: You can’t do that!

Someity: I can and I just did. I don’t need anyone to make fun of my diet. Mic drop.

Vinicius: …

Sumi: …

THE SIDEMASCOTS!

Crackhead: CLEAR!

Wenlock: AH, WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!

Crackhead: Please, forgive me for what I’ve done to you today!

Wenlock: Why is she suddenly praying for me today?

Vinicius: Uh… you’re a deity.

Wenlock: REALLY?!

Sumi: REALLY! And because of you we’ll officially grant you lifetime aura insurance!

Wenlock: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Vinicius: Anyway…

VOTE NOW!

Vinicius: For the next 24 hours, you get to choose who will fill the vacant slot in the Sidemascots!

Sumi: Choose between…

Vinicius: Ettie (the Paris 2024 mascot kind!)

Ettie: VIVA LA PARIS!

Sumi: Zakumi!

Zakumi: Zamina Mina, eh eh, Waka waka eh eh eh!

Vinicius: Tom!

Tom: Don’t you start…

Sumi: Tani!

Tani: PLEASE! THIS IS MY ONE AND ONLY CHANCE TO ESCAPE FROM NORTH KOREAN SPIES!

Vinicius: Moongcho!

Sumi: I don’t think he’s okay…

Vinicius: A Bull?

(Perry puts his hat on again, tired of Phineas and Ferb references)

Vinicius and Sumi: PERRY THE BULL?!

Vinicius: You have 24 hours to vote…

Sumi: SO VOTE, NOW!

Vinicius: I recommend you vote for Tom.

Tom: WHAT?! DON’T VOTE ME! THESE GUYS ARE SH-

[rainbowbobatea]

Chapter 1

“You’re always with me in my head, never out of my mind.” — Unknown

[The Jackman Base, North-West Colorado]

"You're a dead man, Hugh Jackman."

Howie growls, his breath hot against Hugh's ear as he presses the gun into Hugh's mouth. The cold metal of the gun barrel slides between Hugh's teeth, flooding his mouth with the acrid taste of iron and gunpowder.

Death has a flavor, and this is it.

Hugh winces, holding back a gag as he tongues the barrel into his cheek. His words come out muffled, but defiant.

"And you're a short man, Howie D."

A kick to the shin. Worth it. Hugh's eyes water, but he doesn't flinch. Across the dim warehouse, the echoes of his empire being dismantled reach his ears—barrels rolling, guns clattering. The Backstreet Boys strip the place bare, just like they've stripped him. His golden pendant, his tailored suit, his dignity—all gone.

Howie yanks the gun from Hugh's mouth, pressing it to his forehead.

"¡Cállate el carajo! One more word and I'll—"

"What? Throw a Napoleon-sized fit?"

Howie's finger twitches on the trigger. Hugh braces for the bang, but it doesn't come.

"Yo, Howie!" AJ's voice bounces off the dank walls. "Quit playin' and help with these loads!"

Brian, hefting a crate, chimes in. "Yeah, man. Hugh's goons could show any minute."

Howie doesn't budge, eyes locked on Hugh. "No. Someone's gotta watch this pendejo."

"He's tied up tight," Brian counters.

"Ten years," Howie snarls, pressing the gun harder against Hugh's skin. "Ten years since we last saw each other face to face. Your organs'll fetch a pretty penny."

Hugh shrugs, feigning nonchalance. "What's the going rate? Two million aussies? Three million aussies?"

"This ain't Australia, jackass."

"True," Hugh smirks, eyeing Howie's disheveled appearance. "And here's another fun fact—your shirt's on backwards, mate."

Howie's face contorts in confusion. "What—"

Bam! Hugh's forehead collides with Howie's nose, a sickening crunch echoing through the warehouse. In a flash, Hugh wiggles out of his restraints and snatches the gun, his bound hands fumbling but determined. He fires wildly, the shots ricocheting off metal and concrete.

Chaos erupts. The Backstreet Boys scatter like startled pigeons, ducking behind crates and machinery.

"Shit!" AJ yells, diving for cover. "He's loose!"

Kevin, crouched behind a barrel, glares at Howie. "Great. Because Howie decided he wanted to make a speech like a pastor instead of helping us, Hugh's escaping."

Amidst the mayhem, Hugh spots a glint of gold—his mafia necklace, worth millions, sitting on top of his clothes. With a grunt, he lunges forward, snatching all his stuff before scrambling towards the exit.

Brian emerges from behind a forklift, gun drawn. "Don't let him—"

Too late. Hugh, finally free of his bonds, sprints across the warehouse floor. His eyes dart around, spotting a row of cars. Without hesitation, he smashes the window of a sleek Chevy, hotwiring it with practiced ease.

The engine roars to life as Nick emerges from the warehouse, face pale. "Oh, come on! That was my Chevy!"

Aaron, runs out behind him, a grin splitting his face. "Yay, he didn't steal mine!"

Nick whirls on his brother, blue eyes blazing. "Shut up, Aaron! This isn't funny!"

The Backstreet Boys scramble to their vehicles, tires screeching as they peel out of the lot. Brian, gripping the steering wheel of his SUV, shouts over the engine's roar, "We can't let him get away! If he warns his crew, we're toast!"

As Hugh tears down the Colorado highway, his mind races faster than the stolen Chevy. How the hell did his rival gang find him here, of all places? He had hundreds of territories across America and Australia, a vast empire built on extortion, smuggling, and countless other crimes.

Yet somehow, after so many years, they'd bumped into each other this very morning.

"Bloody hell," Hugh mutters, swerving around a slow-moving minivan. He’s half naked while speeding down a packed highway.

What a way to start the day.

He'd promised Ava and Oscar he'd get them McDonald's breakfast. Despite having maids to whip up gourmet meals, his little kids still craved those greasy hash browns and loved the cheap plastic toys.

But first, daddy had business to do.

He'd only meant to check on some orders, but instead, found himself in this mess when he bumped into the Backstreet Boys outside the hidden warehouse.

Ah, shit.

In his rearview mirror, Hugh spots the convoy of cars in hot pursuit. He floors it, the speedometer climbing past 100 mph. In Brian's SUV, Kevin suddenly turns green.

"Pull over!" he gags, hand over his mouth.

Brian glances at him, alarmed. "What? We can't stop now!"

But it's too late. Kevin leans out the window, retching violently. The contents of his stomach splatter across the side of the car.

"Oh, come on!" AJ yells from the backseat. "That's nasty, man!"

Up ahead, traffic grinds to a halt. Hugh curses, abandoning the Chevy and taking off on foot. A couple of cars honk and women whistle as he runs through the sea of cars, half naked. His bare chest and abs get assaulted by the cool, autumn breeze.

“Ah, shit.” He shivers, trying to wiggle into his suit and tie again.

Suddenly, while getting dressed, fhe expensive pendant slips from his grasp, clattering far away from him into the pavement. But before he can retrieve it, a woman nearby bends down, scooping it up. Her face lightens up; she looks at the object in awe.

Oh no.

No, no.

Hugh's hand flies to his concealed weapon, ready to eliminate this unexpected complication. But as the woman looks up, looking around, he freezes.

She's... beautiful.

Stunning, really. Her brown eyes, contrast to the light pink sweater she's wearing, looks wide and curious. They blink, locking into his for a millisecond.

For a moment, Hugh forgets how to breathe…

The black woman looks around and shrugs, oblivious to the danger, and continues walking. Hugh watches her go, gun still in his pocket, unfired.

He never hesitates to kill.

So why now?

Transfixed, Hugh observes as she strolls away, hips swaying hypnotically beneath her skin tight jeans. She's humming softly—he strains to catch the melody. "Part of Your World" from The Little Mermaid, he realizes with a start.

Hugh stands rooted to the spot, amazed by her kindness... and, if he's honest, by how magnificently curvy she is.

Hugh feels his cheeks flush, his pulse quickens, and he tears his gaze away. He's seen a lot of things—brutal beatings, cold-blooded murders, you name it. But this woman's simple act of charity has him rattled. She seems so…kind.

Innocent.

His hand trembles as he lowers his gun, his eyes glued to her retreating figure. Usually, he'd have no qualms about taking what he wanted, but something holds him back. Perhaps it's those full, kissable lips, curved in a smile that reaches her big brown doe eyes.

Get a grip, man.

Hugh shakes his head, berating himself for his hesitation. He's a mafia boss, for crying out loud! A powerful, feared figure in the criminal underworld. Yet here he is, tongue-tied and flushed, like a lovesick teenager over a woman he barley knew for 10 minutes.

With a forceful exhale, he strides after her, his eyes scanning her curves appreciatively.

As she walks, the hem of her sweater rides up, granting Hugh a glimpse of smooth, chocolate-colored skin. He imagines what lies beneath—lacy lingerie, perhaps, hugging her voluptuous curves?

The thought sends a rush of warmth through him, and he curses under his breath.

"Focus," he mutters to himself.

He debates whether to confront her, demand the mafia chain back. Or maybe he could be a bit more... persuasive. A nudge here, a whispered threat there—he's an expert at getting what he wants.

Yet, despite his usual assertiveness, he finds himself tongue-tied, unable to disturb this woman's serenity. What would she think of him if he did? The disappointed look on her face, the fear in her eyes…

He can't bear the thought.

So he lingers at a distance, his eyes never leaving her. With each step, he notices more about her—the way her hair falls in cute curls, the graceful sway of her hips, the confident bounce in her step.

His heart skips a beat every time she glances over her shoulder, as if sensing his gaze…

---

Meanwhile, back at the traffic jam, the Backstreet Boys bicker in their stalled vehicles.

"This is all your fault, Howie!" Nick shouts from his car window.

Howie, nursing his bruised nose, fires back, "My fault? If you hadn't insisted on taking that shortcut—"

"Oh, don't start with that again," Brian interjects. "Your 'shortcuts' always end up taking twice as long!" His eyes widen worry as he sighs. "Leighanne is gonna kill me if I don't get back in time for our date night."

"Yo, but if Hugh rallies his crew, then he'll kill you too," AJ shakes, his voice tinged with worry. "So either way, you're dead tonight man."

"Ah, shit."

Kevin, his usual reserved demeanor giving way to concern, adds, "We need to find him, now."

"Yeah," Aaron pipes up, "and we gotta get back Nick's poor car back!"

Nick whirls on his brother. "Nobody asked you, Aaron! Why are you even here?"

As the arguing intensifies, Kevin stumbles out of Brian's SUV, still looking queasy. "Guys, can we please just... not? I think I left my stomach about three miles back."

"Damn, speaking of stomach's—mine is growling," AJ groans, patting his shirt.

Brian nods in agreement. "Yeah, man. All this chasing and arguing's worked up an appetite."

"Let's grab some grub," Nick suggests, already pulling out his phone. "I know a great steakhouse nearby."

He dials Outback Steakhouse, tapping his fingers impatiently against the steering wheel as he waits for someone to pick up. The others watch expectantly, their mouths already watering at the thought of juicy steaks and loaded baked potatoes.

Finally, Nick's face lights up. "Hello? Yes, I'd like to make a reservation for—" His expression quickly falls. "What do you mean no more room? It's the middle of the afternoon!" He listens for a moment, his frown deepening. "Fine. Thanks."

Nick angrily jabs the end call button and hurls his phone onto the dashboard.

"Shut the fuck up...bitch!" he yells at the device, startling the others.

"Whoa," Howie says, eyebrows raised. "What's got you so worked up?"

Nick runs a hand through his blond hair, frustration evident in his voice. "They're fully booked. Can you believe it? On a Tuesday afternoon!"

"Now what?" Aaron asks, peering out the window. "I'm starving!"

Just then, Brian spots a quaint little establishment tucked between two larger buildings. The sign above the door reads "Belle's Books & Brews" in elegant, curling script.

"Hey, how about that place?" he suggests, pointing it out to the others. "Might as well go in, right?"

The group exchanges glances, considering the option. It's not their usual type of hangout, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

"I don't know, man," AJ hesitates, looking down at his tattoo-covered arms and ripped jeans. "Should we change? We look like a mob gang."

There's a moment of silence as they all take in each other's appearances—leather jackets, dark sunglasses, and an overall air of intimidation.

Brian snorts, breaking the tension. "Well... we are one."

"True B-Rok," Kevin concedes with a shrug.

With that settled, they try finding a space to park their vehicles and make their way towards Le Festin, drawing curious glances from passbyers.

Meanwhile, back at the Carey-Cobain household, chaos was unfolding that morning too…

In the living room, twins Roc and Roe engage in a heated tug-of-war over a shirt.

"It's mine!" Roc insists, his small hands gripping the fabric tightly.

Roe yanks back, her pigtails bouncing with the effort. "No way! Mom bought it for me!"

Their squabble provides a discordant backdrop to Ariana's high-pitched vocalizing. She prances around the house, hitting impossibly high notes as she warms up her voice.

"I'm like a bird, I'll only fly awaaaaaay!" Ariana trills, twirling dramatically.

Sophia, bleary-eyed and clutching a steaming mug of coffee, shoots her sister a withering glare. "For the love of God, Ari, it's too early for this. Shut up!"

Ariana pauses mid-note, pouting. "You're just jealous of my angelic voice, Soph."

"More like demonic," Soph mutters, taking a long sip of her coffee.

In the kitchen, Mariah bustles about in her silk robe and fuzzy slippers. The aroma of bacon and pancakes wafts through the air as she flips flapjacks with one hand while stirring a pot of grits with the other. She sighs, secretly glaring at her husband, Kirt, for sleeping through all of the chaos.

"Frances, honey," Mariah calls out, "can you go wake up Shar? Breakfast is almost ready."

Frances nods, padding down the hallway to Shar's room. She raps gently on the door. "Shar? You up?"

"Uh, yeah…" Shar is already awake, but the noise is enough to make anyone want to stay tucked away in the comfort of their room. She creeks the door open, flinching as Ari’s voice fills the air.

“Oooo yeahhhh!”

"Tell mama that I’m gonna take a walk," Shar tells Frances, carefully sneaking out as she puts on her airpods. She quickly dons a sweater and heads out, shitting the door and breathing in a big gulp of air.

“Ugh, I needed this.”

The crisp air tingles her skin, sending goosebumps down her arms, as she hits play on her phone, 'Rock Your Body' blasting into her ears. It's one of her favorite tunes, and she can't help but bounce along to the beat.

Autumn is Shar's favorite season. To her, summer is unbearably hot, spring damp and buggy, and winter just too darn cold. But autumn? It's perfect.

The breeze is just right, the leaves paint the town with color, and who can resist a pumpkin spice latte? Plus, she gets to wrap herself in cozy sweaters.

What more could a girl ask for?

As she strolls, kicking the occasional crunching leaf, she feels a sense of peace in the quiet town. It's so safe here that if you left your wallet on a park bench, someone would likely return it before you even realized it was missing. No crimes, no robberies, none of that stuff…

Screech!

Pop! Pop!

She pauses mid-step, her eyes snapping open at the sound of commotion. Did she just…hear gunshots? Shar's heart skips a beat, but she quickly shakes off the notion.

Nah. Nothing bad ever happens in their quiet Colorado town.

Besides, her mind is on something else entirely as she continues her walk—the glint of something shiny on the pavement. She bends down to pick it up, her eyes widening at the sight of a gold necklace with a weird symbol.

"Wow," she breathes, "this is gorgeous."

Shar turns it over in her hands, the pendant sparkling in the sunlight. It looks expensive, maybe even custom-made. She smiles, taking it as a lucky sign.

Maybe today will be a great day after all!

As she walks, continuing to listen as her playlist switches to disney songs, a chill runs through her. For some very odd reason, she can't shake the weird feeling that someone is following her.

She stops and turns, her eyes scanning the area.

But there's no one there.

“Huh.” Shar sucks in a breath, her eyes scanning the area. Slowly, she continues on her way again, her heart still hammering in her chest. As she nears home, she realizes how worked up she is, and can't help but laugh at herself.

"Girl, you've been listening to too many crime podcasts," she shakes her head.

With a final glance over her shoulder, Shar heads back inside, ready to change and face the day. Unaware of the man just outside her bedroom window, hiding underneath the shadows of the tree…

—

Okay, enough ogling around:

Hugh has to get that pedant back before someone mistakes her for being a part of the mafia too.

But, how?

The pretty girl he'd been watching disappeared into her house, and what's he gonna do now—knock on the door and pretend he's a delivery man? A pizza guy?

Hell nah, that wouldn't work with his fancy suit 'n tie. He needs to be strategic, come up with a plan…

But all of those thoughts fly out the window the moment he walks by her open bedroom window because, honestly? Who can think about anything when this beauty is in front of him, giggling, trying on cute outfits, fixing up her hair…for him?

No, nonsense.

This woman hasn't even met him, but yet—the thought of this her getting ready for him, trying to look pretty for him, turned him on…

So. Badly.

Hugh swallows. He continues to secretly stare at the woman, until the peaceful afternoon turns chaotic—the bedroom door bursts open, and a tiny toddler goes flying inside. She's got wild, uncontrollable curls, big brown eyes, and a mischievous grin.

"Goya on the loose!" a voice shouts from inside the house.

Hugh watches, amused, as the little girl zigzags through the room, her laughter ringing out. He pictures how this woman would play with his kids—Ava and Oscar—and smiles at the thought.

She’d probably make a great mom…

As abruptly as the chaos began, it settles. The woman reappears, back in the bedroom... and his breath catches as she starts to undress. Her movements are leisurely, deliberate, almost as if she's performing for him…only him.

No one else but him.

“Fuck…” His gaze rakes over her luscious curves as she peels off her clothes, piece by piece, and honestly? He can't help but leans closer to the window, eyes devouring her. She teases him without even knowing it, running her hands seductively over her body.

Then, to his surprise, she picks up a small pink toy and lays on the bed, legs spread wide as she—

Oh.

Hugh's eyes widen as his cock twitches in his pants. He can almost hear her soft moans above the whirring of the fan, imagine the sultry look on her face as she loses herself in pleasure. One day, she's going to look like that as he touches her body…

Her hips…

Breasts…

Smooth, soft skin…

Ring, ring!

“Huh?!” Hugh flinches. The sudden shrill of his iPhone startles him, and he curses under his breath. He freezes as Shar's head snaps up, her eyes scanning the room. She hasn't seen him, has she?

He hopes not.

Hugh quickly ducks behind a tree, pressing the phone to his ear as his beating heart begins to calm down. “Hey, Ryan."

"Hey! Good morning—"

"Cut to the chase."

"Woah, woah, woah. Sheesh," Ryan says. "Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Cranky 'cause you still haven't gotten laid yet?"

Hugh groans. "Just cut to the chase, mate."

"Listen, heard one of our warehouses got busted by another group. Everything okay over there?" Ryan asks, his voice laced with concern.

Hugh's mind is still half on the woman in front of him, but he manages to respond, "Yeah, yeah, everything's fine. Just—"

Ryan launches into a nonstop tirade as Hugh's gaze darts back to the window. Shar is still there, her eyes closed, her body arching slightly.

He bites back a groan, torn between the call and the tempting vision before him. Finally, Ryan winds down, leaving Hugh to fumble for a response.

"Uh, yeah. No, that sounds good. We'll figure it out. Thanks, mate," Hugh stammers, his attention still very much on Shar.

As Ryan's voice fades, the woman's movements slow. She settles back onto the bed, a smile of satisfaction on her face, her chest gently rising and falling. Hugh knows he should leave, but he's transfixed by the sight of her, post-orgasmic glow and all. It’s so fucking beautiful, more prettier than the sunset before night. He's captivated by the way she runs her hands over her body, fingers lingering on her soft curves...

Suddenly, she hops off the bed and heads into her washroom, shutting the door shut. He blinks, taken aback by her sudden disappearance.

Now's your chance. Your chance to get it back.

With a final, lingering look, he hoists himself into Shar's bedroom through the open window. His eyes scan the room, taking in the cozy space filled with fairy lights, books, and pop funkos.He spots the pendant on the bed and reaches for it when two text message pops up on her phone.

Ding! Ding!

Usually, he minds his business—never caring to snoop around other people’s stuff unless it benefited him with money or power.

But, today?

He can’t help but wanna know more about her, this mysterious woman that he saw today. Any information about her excited him, so it wasn’t surprising when he found himself absentmindedly reaching for her phone, eager to see who had access to her. He prayed, hoping he wouldn’t see any male names in the notifications.

And thankfully, he didn’t.

'Mish: Gyal! You too down bad!"

'Lizzie: Ready to start your shift at Le Festin?’

Shar. Shar…Shar, Shar. Shar. Hm…

Such a pretty name.

But it's going to sound even prettier once she's on top of him, grinding against him, making him moan out his name as he reaches ecstasy in bed—

Shar…

Shar.

A soft sound startles him from his reverie. He freezes, his eyes widening as he realizes someone has entered the room.

Oh, crickey.

It's the little girl from earlier, "Goya." Her big brown eyes regard him curiously, and he offers a cautious wave. She seems unfazed by his presence, simply waving back before toddling off, her chubby legs carrying her away.

"O-oh, okay. Well, then…bye, I guess."

Hugh exhales a breath he didn't realize he was holding. He's faced off against dangerous criminals, stared down the barrel of a gun, and yet this little girl had him on edge.

For goodness sake...

Eager to head out, he grabs the pendant (and the toy Shar was using) and pockets both items. He hops back out the window. As he walks away, he glances back at the bathroom door where she was probably showering, soaping up that body, just for him.

Getting all ready, just for him.

"I'll see you soon…Shar," he murmurs to himself, kicking a few leaves. “At the cafe. I can't wait for you to get to know me better…”

He takes one last look at the house before walking off, taking out the toy from his pocket, pressing it against his lips. Her scent still lingers. Hugh smiles.

“…I think we’ll get along just fine.”

{A busy afternoon at Le Festin}

An hour into her shift and already?

Things are a disaster. Ugh.

The bustling café feels more like a battlefield to Shar, who's doing her best to keep up with the onslaught of orders. Every time she thinks she's making progress, another customer steps up to the counter, their order more complicated than the last. She feels like a stretched out wad of gum as she runs around, trying to serve orders:

"I'll have a pumpkin-spiced Matcha latte, with soy milk and an extra shot of vanilla, please."

"Do you have avocado toast? But can you add tomatoes and make sure they're ripe, not too squishy, but also not too firm..."

"Two slices of banana bread, warmed up, and a chocolate croissant, but I want the flaky kind, none of that soft crap."

Shar feels like she's drowning, and the cherry on top of this stressful sundae is her phone blowing up with texts from her Mama Mariah, asking if she's eaten, reminding her to drink enough water, and texts from her sisters to bring back muffins, pretty please?

As if on cue, Lizzie approaches with a harried expression, saying, "Shar, honey, I need you to handle Table 12. They've been waiting a while, and they're getting antsy."

Shar bites back a groan. "Sure thing."

With a deep breath, she steels herself and makes her way towards the group of men, trying to keep her smile from looking too strained.

"Hi! Welcome to Le Festin. Wanna know what's new on the menu today?"

The men, deep in an argument, don't notice her presence until she's almost at their table. It's only when AJ, mid-gesture, catches sight of her that the arguing stops abruptly, like a record scratch.

"Well, hello there, sweetheart," AJ drawls, flashing a heart-stopping grin. His lighthearted tone immediately changes the atmosphere, and Shar feels a flutter in her stomach.

"Are you on the menu?" He winks, and Shar feels her cheeks heat up. She can't help but laugh, rolling her eyes playfully.

"Uh…not today, I guess." Shar rolls her eyes, playing with her pen.

While AJ's charm works its magic, Howie sits frozen in his seat, his face a brilliant shade of red. He opens his mouth to speak, but all that comes out is an unintelligible mumble. His eyes, wide and awestruck, dart everywhere but at Shar, as if looking directly at her might cause him to spontaneously combust.

Damn. That woman is gorgeous.

Kevin, still looking slightly green around the gills, clears his throat. "Excuse me, miss," he says, his voice strained. "Where's the restroom? I'm not feeling too hot."

Shar nods sympathetically, pointing towards the back of the café. "Of course! The restrooms are just past bookshelves—"

"Thank you!"

As Kevin rushes off, Nick leans in, trying his best to appear casual.

"Hey, quick question," he says, his voice lowered conspiratorially. "You haven't seen any car with a broken window around here lately, have you…?"

Shar blinks, caught off guard by the odd question.

"Uh…like a robbed one? No, can't say I have," she replies, her brow furrowing. "Though, now that you mention it, I did hear some weird noises earlier. Like…gun shots?"

At her innocent response, the playful atmosphere at the table evaporates. The men exchange worried glances, their easy banter replaced by an awkward silence. Shar, oblivious to the sudden tension, continues to smile brightly as she jots down their orders.

"Alright, so anyways—I'll be back with your order in no time!"

Shar rushes back to the kitchen, heart sinking as she realizes how long the line has gotten while she was away. The cacophony of impatient customers, clinking cups, and whirring machines fills the air, creating a symphony of chaos.

More chaotic than her home this morning.

Shar's head spins as she tries to juggle it all. She grabs a tray piled high with steaming mugs of coffee, her hands shaking slightly under the weight. As she turns to deliver the drinks, her foot catches on a loose floorboard and—

"Oh!"

Time seems to slow as Shar feels herself falling…

Falling…

Falling.

The tray tilts, hot liquid sloshing dangerously close to the edges of the mugs. She closes her eyes, bracing for impact, the mess, the hard floor…

But the crash never comes.

Instead, Shar feels strong arms wrap around her, steadying her just inches from the ground. The tray miraculously rights itself, not a drop spilled. Shar opens her eyes, ready to thank her savior, only to find herself staring into the face of a man she's never seen before.

…Oh?

“You okay?” He says, his hands resting on her waist.

Shar opens her mouth, no words coming out as she stares. He's tall, impeccably dressed in a sharp suit that screams 'important business,' and devastatingly handsome.

And yet…cute, like a puppy?

Two round brown eyes that focus on her. Shar's breath catches in her throat as she takes in his chiseled jawline and the hands still wrapped around her.

"I... uh..." she stammers, suddenly very aware of how close they are. "T-thanks."

The man smiles, a crooked grin that makes Shar's heart do a little flip. His arms move up to her arms, helping her balance the tray.

The other hand? It lingers on her waist, ever-so-slightly caressing it…

"No problem at all," he says, his Australian voice deep and smooth. "Though, I think your shirt might need some attention."

Shar looks down to see coffee stains spreading across her once-pristine white blouse. She groans, mortified.

"Hey, it's okay," the man assures her, his voice calm. He brushes a hair lock from her face. "I'll handle this. Go grab a clean shirt in the back."

“But I—“

His finger silences her, before he gently tilts her chin up at him. “Go on. I got this, alright.”

“Oh…okay.”

Boy, is this guy really touchy. Blushing, Shar nods gratefully and hesitantly turns to leave, disappearing into the back. A disgruntled voice pipes up from the growing line of customers.

"Hey! What about my order? I've been waiting forever!"

Hugh watches Shar close the back door before whirring around, his easy smile replaced by a look that could freeze lava. He locks eyes with the complaining customer, his voice low and dangerous.

"Yell at her again," he says quietly, "and I'll rip out your fucking vocal cords from your throat.”

…..

Silence.

The customer's face drains of color. He stammers a quick apology and retreats to the back of the line, suddenly very interested in the menu board.

Meanwhile, Shar returns, freshly changed and still a bit flustered. She finds Hugh calmly wiping drops of coffee from the floor.

"Thank you so much," she says, smiling shyly. "I don't know what I would have done without you. Oh, I'm Shar by the way."

The man grins, his boyish smile making her heart do another flip. "Hugh," he replies. "And it's my pleasure. Always happy to help a pretty girl out.”

Shar laughs, feeling her cheeks heat up again. "Thank you" she rubs her neck shyly. "But seriously, how have I never seen you here before? Are you new?"

Hugh’s heart skips a beat. His mind works overtime to come up with something—anything, besides a “Yeah, I work as a mafia boss in this part of town.”

"Actually, I've been working at this cafe for a while. Maybe you were too busy on your phone to notice."

Shar gasps in mock offense, but can't help giggling. "I'm a bad girl," she admits. "Always checking my phone during shifts."

Hugh swallows hard, his eyes darkening for a moment at her words

Bad girl? Oh…you're dirty, yes you are.

The moment is broken by a crash from across the café. Shar flinches, quickly remembering her duties. "Oh no, I still have to serve that big group of guys," she groans.

"I can help," Hugh offers immediately, already reaching for a tray.

"You sure?"

"Yes. You go deal with the line while I serve this for you. Deal?"

A burst of relief floods her aching bones. She smiles, grateful for his help. "Deal."

Before Shar can protest anymore, Hugh strides towards the table where the group of men sit. As he approaches, his confident stride falters. His eyes widen in recognition, and the tray in his hands begins to shake ever so slightly.

Oh. Shit.

He screwed up.

The reaction from the table is instantaneous. All five men jump to their feet, chairs scraping loudly against the floor. Howie, his earlier shyness forgotten, lunges forward and grabs Hugh by the collar.

"You!" Howie snarls, his face contorted with rage. "What the hell are you doing here?!"

Hugh's heart races as he stares into the furious faces of the Backstreet Boys. The cafe's ambient chatter fades away, leaving only the sound of his own rapid breathing. He tries to maintain his composure, but his hands tremble slightly as he holds the tray.

He hopes Shar isn't around to overhear…

Howie's grip on Hugh's collar tightens, his knuckles turning white. "I asked you a question," he hisses through clenched teeth. "What. Are. You. Doing. Here?"

"…Serving you food?"

"Oh, cut the crap."

The other members of the group fan out, effectively blocking any escape routes. AJ's earlier charm has vanished, replaced by a cold, calculating stare. Nick's hand hovers near his waist, ready to draw a concealed weapon if necessary. Brian and Kevin exchange worried glances, their eyes darting between Hugh and the oblivious cafe patrons.

Boy, it would be so easy to get rid of them with the trigger of his hidden gun—but there’s no way he would do it in front of Shar…not when he just gained her trust.

Hugh opens his mouth to respond, but before he can utter a word, a familiar voice cuts through the tension.

"Stop!"

Shar rushed over, her heart beating out of her chest. "What are you doing? I won't let you get angry at my co-worker!"

All heads turn to look at her, and for a moment, the entire cafe seems to hold its breath. Howie's grip on Hugh's collar loosens as he takes in Shar's presence. Her eyes are wide with concern, her chest heaving slightly from her sprint across the cafe.

Even in her regular cafe uniform, she's breathtakingly beautiful.

Howie's throat goes dry. "I... uh..."

Shar places her hands on her round hips, her expression a mix of determination and disappointment. "I don't know what's going on here, but this is unacceptable behavior. I'm going to have to ask you all to leave."

The Backstreet Boys exchange bewildered looks. They're not used to being ordered around, especially not by a petite barista.

"But-" Nick starts to protest, but Shar cuts him off with a stern look.

"No buts. Out. Now."

Reluctantly, the group begins to file out of the cafe. They all grumble, mad at Howie for ruining their brunch as the door closes behind them. The cafe erupts into hushed whispers.

Shar turns to Hugh, her eyes full of concern. "Are you okay? I'm so sorry about that."

Hugh straightens his collar, trying to regain his composure. "I'm fine, thanks to you," he says with a grateful smile. "You were amazing."

Shar blushes at the compliment, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Oh, it was nothing. I just couldn't stand by and watch those random customers treat you like that."

Random customers.

Ah, it's so cute how Shar has no idea that she just yelled at a group of dangerous mafia leaders. She’s so innocent. So very clueless.

Hugh's smile widens. The way she defended him made him wanna award her, so reaches into his pocket, pulling out the golden necklace. "Speaking of not standing by... I believe this belongs to you."

Shar's eyes widen in surprise. "My necklace! But how did you...?"

Hugh's mind races, quickly formulating a lie. "I saw you drop it on my way to work this morning. I was going to give it to you earlier, but things got a bit... hectic."

Shar beams, holding up the pendant to catch the light. "It's beautiful! I can't believe you found it. Thank you so much."

Hugh’s fingers brush her skin as he puts the necklace around her neck. His mind flashes with thoughts: one day, her neck will be decorated with other necklaces. No not just jewelry, but hickeys. His love bites. He'd suck on her smooth, chocolate skin as he thrusts into her and she’d be all his. His, his, his—

Bzzz, bzzz.

Her phone rings, shattering the moment. She giggles, her cheeks flushing as she fumbles to answer it.

"Sorry, I should take this," she says, stepping away slightly.

“Ah, alright.” Disappointment weighs him down as Hugh watches as Shar talk on the phone, her face lighting up with each word. He strains to hear, curiosity getting the better of him.

It's a man's voice on the other end, deep and warm.

His blood boils almost immediately.

Please, he thinks desperately, let it be a brother, a cousin, an uncle... anyone but a b-

Shar ends the call and turns back to Hugh, her expression sheepish. "Sorry about that," she says, tucking her phone away. "It was my boyfriend."

Hugh's heart plummets, the word echoing in his mind. Boyfriend. Boyfriend. Boyfriend. He struggles to keep his expression neutral, even as he feels his world crumbling around him.

"Oh," he manages to choke out, his voice strained. "That's... nice."

"Well…more like a new guy I’m starting to see. He said he won't be able to make it on time for our date tonight…"

Shar starts to drone on, talking about what she'll have to do now that her boyfriend can't come to her date. But, oh…honestly?

Even if ber boyfriend able to go, Hugh was going to make sure it never happened.

"Don't worry, Shar," Hugh thinks, staring down at the curvy, petite black woman with newfound fondness.

"I'll make sure that this is the last day you're ever disappointed…it’s time to get rid of some trash.”

[droptoeholdyourhorses]

Thankfully I got to Wembley and back without running into any issues with the trains. Even just getting on at the station, I saw four other people wearing wrestling shirts and that number gradually increased the closer it got to London. The whole day had a similar atmosphere to when I attended WrestleMania 31. Wrestling. Fans. Everywhere.

I was up in the nosebleeds so not the best of views, having to rely on the screen above the ring for most of the night. The atmosphere more than made up for it. Although I am jealous of my work mate who also attended, had floor seats, and can be seen multiple times in the crowd throughout the show.

Ticketmaster told me the doors opened at 3:30, that Zero Hour would start at 5, and the main show would start at 6. Thank goodness I was in my seat by 4:15 because otherwise I would have missed Powerhouse Hobbs and Miro who were in the ring at 4:30. Imagine still being in line at the merch stand instead. Side note - I thought WWE replica titles were pricey going for £300 to £450. AEW replicas start at £650 and go up to £850.

From where I was sat, I had no clue it was Anthony Ogogo with Paul Wight and Grado. Genuinely thought it was Wardlow at first. Mercedes got a good reaction the first time she was shown but got a better pop the second time once more fans had filled in and the main show was underway.

I saw Aussie Open compete at NJPW Royal Quest in August 2019 and I didn't think much of them at the time. Fair play to the lads, they've had a hell of a few years since. Would have hoped for them to hold onto the ROH tag titles for longer. Don't think they'll be complaining about opening All In against the hottest act in the company though.

Not much reaction to this match in my section, although people were glad to see HOOK get the win. Jack Perry doing Rolling Thunder on top of the limo was also impressive. I do wonder how a casual fan checking out the show would react to Perry's comment about the limo having real glass.

"Well, duh, what else would it be?"

Every time I have seen Samoa Joe live, he's gotten a positive reaction whether playing face or heel. CM Punk was met with a mixed response, although I couldn't see anyone that didn't sing along with Cult of Personality. I understand the logic of "I'm gonna take your Real World Championship simply so you can't have it." I don't understand the logic of AEW promoting matches for a fake title. Will Thunder Rosa declare herself the Real Women's Champion when she returns? If this does end up being Punk's swansong, there are worse ways to go. From an on-screen perspective at least.

Omega, Ibushi, and Page losing was not popular with the live crowd, getting some "bull plop" chants. I wasn't that fussed personally, think it makes sense for Takeshita to keep building momentum ahead of the singles with Kenny. The six-man tag was fine for what it was but I wouldn't say there was anything particularly memorable here either.

Ahead of their usual Superkick Party theme, the Young Bucks had a short "Another One Bites The Dust" parody "A Superkick Knocks You Out". It wouldn't be the last time an act on the show would shoehorn in a Queen song. Both teams put on a solid match as you'd expected, definitely picking up the pace as it went on. Surprised that FTR retained given Cash's recent issues. Wembley was most respectful of the manner, singing "Wheeler's Got a Gun" to the tune of "Give It Up".

I like Eddie Kingston. I like Orange Cassidy and the Best Friends. I like the Blackpool Combat Club. It's a shame I was limited as to how much I got to see of them. And that's not because of the cheap seats. Stadium Stampede was always going to be a hard watch live with ten different guys in four or five different places at once. It felt like Eddie was gone for most of the match. Penta's transformation from El Zero Miedo to Oscuro did not come across well live either. Was mostly met by confusion and laughter. Massive reactions for Orange and of course SUE! Great to see Cassidy, Trent and Chuck get the win on such a big stage.

Remember the band Queen? Saraya sure does. Remember Queen Elizabeth II? Toni Storm sure does. Remember great women's wrestling? Tony Khan might be forgetting it. This match suffered from its placement on the card and there wasn't much crowd noise for it, at least where I was sat. Toni Storm accidentally decking Saraya's mum drew an "ooooooo" and Saraya got a good pop for the win.

I've now seen Sting wrestle for four different promotions - WWA, TNA, WWE, and AEW. It's amazing that he's still going at 64 and having such a great run to boot. Massive reaction for his old WCW theme Seek and Destroy too.

I saw a Casket match between Mr. Anderson and Bully Ray at a TNA show in 2014. Except they had a cheap wooden casket that looked like it would fall apart any second. I think the four guys in this would have preferred it, given how often each did a spot directly onto the coffin itself. Everyone delivered in this one.

Before making his proper entrance, Chris Jericho decided to mimic Freddie Mercury. Can't think why. Judas is a catchy song and having 80,000+ singing it all at once was immense. I know people wanted to see Will Ospreay against someone else, such as a third match with Kenny Omega, but I was hyped for this one. Always been a Jericho fan, one of the first wrestlers I remember seeing when I started watching in 2001. Ospreay is tremendous and I had only seen him live in a throwaway tag match previously. These two knocked it out of the park and this was probably my match of the night.

As soon as I got to Wembley Stadium and found my spot in the massive queue, there were already people singing "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands". There were tributes to Bray Wyatt throughout the night and it reached its most poignant during House of Black's entrance.

Quite a contrast then when The Acclaimed and Billy Gunn won, leading to the World's Largest Scissoring.

Oh boy, this was a divisive one live. Some people around me loved it and were thrilled that friendship won out the night, some people thought the match had too much comedy and needed one guy betraying the other. One guy in my section would not stop shouting for Adam Cole to take his shirt off and take it seriously. I liked it for the most part. Wasn't a fan of the false double pin, even with the immediate restart. Glad that Better Than You Bay Bay is still going. Hope All Out doesn't undo it immediately.

Overall, I had a great time at All In and very much hope I can go again in 2024. Would have liked to attend with someone rather than be on my own, but did get to meet up with my work mate for a burger after the show. I also got to see Cash Wheeler, Sonjay Dutt, Wheeler Yuta and SUE! in passing too. Fun times all round... was absolutely exhausted after. Luckily, there's no more London shows this year...

At least, I'm not currently planning to go to Royal Quest III anyhow.