#colored pencil brushes my beloved

[vlasdygoth]

are you cold?

[saltedserval]

Me irl

[solidwater05]

Scrolling through the #ibispaint brush tag at 1:30 am in hopes that I find The One

[k2ntoss]

okay so yet again i was scrolling through insta reels and i saw this and immediately thought, 'oh jason would love one of this with his helmet' so i thought i'd share (hopefully the video doesn't just disappear into the ether or this wont make much sense but yeah)

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C8XdIwStYFg/?igsh=MWdzZXVpZHV3dm8zbw==

((in case it does for some reason disappear, it was a reel of a girl making a diy spiderman mask shirt with a pattern and then the red colouring bit of the mask was filled in with kisses using paint))

but yeah, i think making a red hood one for jason would be so fun and i just know the man would be so so smitten when it's given to him

anyways, love you, glad your posting again

- the ever present 🦊

"the ever present" OMG I ADORE YOU!!!!!! hi baby, been missing you with your brain tickling requests (i have one on hold but just you wait)

i've been looking to do one of those for me with red hood's logo bc i'm as single as one can be and i know i won't be getting someone to do this for me but okayyyyyy i can do it on my own. here comes something short but done with a lot of love

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ𔓕 ۪  ۫ ୭

jason had been waiting outside the room for hours maybe, he was just sitting on the couch as he looked at the door like a sad puppy because he had arrived this morning to your apartment looking foward to spend time with you. some cuddling, watching a movie together or reading, jason just wanted some quality time with his beloved.

he knew you had been busy during the week with a huge amount of projects you wanted to do but he wasn't expecting you to get so fixated over one to lock yourself into your room and not even peek to see him and he didn't knew why, what jason also didn't knew was the fact that you were already getting dizzy by the smell of paint inside your closed room as you placed the shirt over your desk again, grabbing a pencil to fix the outline of the desing for the hundreth time in the day.

"fuck, fuck, fuck..." you muttered as low as you could to keep jason from darting into the room and ruin the surprise and it took you a good couple of hours to finally have it done, the paint almost completely dry now and the image of it was neat, making you smile and giggle happily.

and it's just then when you decide it's time to open the door, peeking your head through the small space to find jason almost melted on the couch, his head resting against the wall as he kept his eyes closed but it wasn't even a second by when he snapped his eyes open to look at you with a small frown.

"baby? why are you-?" she stopped mid sentence, taking in the sight of your paint smeared lips and chin, the red bright color now cracked on your skin as you smiled back at him as if you just made the biggest discovery in your life.

"hush! c'mere, jaybirdie" you say, leaving the door to your room wide open just to reveal the fact that your whole frame was a mess and that the paint was not only on your face but it had dripped to your shirt and also to your bare thighs to the skin that wasn't covered by the sleeping shorts you were wearing.

jason stands up from his seat, stretching completely from his quick nap and walks into the now messy room. the small paint pots across the floor and desk in different shades of red, paint brushes here and there and then the sight of you standing in front of the middle of your desk, covering something jason couldn't quite see well enough to know what it was.

"i saw something and i had to do this... it's probably the cheesiest thing i've ever done so feel free to laugh at me" and those words make jason tilt his head because what on earth could be so cheesy and made with paint that needed this much time leaving him out of your room? because yes, jason wanted to cuddle and don't blame him.

"princess-" he starts but goes silent the second you pull from the desk a black shirt with a print of his helmet on it, all made in different shades of red kiss marks that emulated the shade of light and everything. his lips remain parted as he walks slowly towards you, his fingers gently tracing the outline of the print on the shirt before he looks at your face, the paint in your skin the evidence of the time you spent painting your lips and pressing kisses to the shirt to make something so sweet for him.

"is it too much? you know, you can just put it into your closet if you don't like-" but your words are cut by a tender kiss, jason cups your face in such a delicate embrace as he lets all his feelings pour into that simple kiss.

"i love it. i love you" he says, his voice a soft whisper even in that deepish tone of his and it makes your heart flutter because jason looks completely happy with the shirt as he holds it into his hands, still admiring the way you decided to replicate a part of him "it's just perfect..."

"can i wear it already?"

the question itself is the sweetest reaction he could give you, the eagerness to wear something you made for him making you giggle excitedly as you shook your head with a small pout.

"not yet, red... i should iron it and give it a quick wash so the paint stays on the fabric" and he pouts slightly because god knows how much he wishes to have your kisses closer to his heart.

[luvvampz]

TW: Children, Swearing (like once), reader can have their kids born naturally (but no pronouns were used nor nick names)

Word count: 565

Terms: (D/n) = Daughters name, (S/n) = Sons name, (Y/n) = Your name, (N/n) = Nick name

Context: (d/n) is not your kids she's Damian's from a previous relationship, (s/n) if both yours and Damian's. Damian is over 18.

A/n: Do give feedback, my very first fanfic on here :)

If you had told Damian that he'd be drawing coloring books for his baby girl because he thought the other kinds were plain and boring, he wouldn't dare believe you.

But here your husband was sitting at his desk while his daughter watched every brush of his pencil. "Baba (dad), that doesn't look like Jasmine..!" She let out a slight huff not quite understanding that it wasn't immediately going to look like the Disney princess until her father got the finishing touches down.

"I know it doesn't. I still have to add some things, be patient." His voice was cool and calm as he responded to his beloved daughter, the daughter you took in as your own because you understood that if you wanted Damian then you got his daughter as well.

"But it's taking so long.. can I wake up (n/n) then? I wanna play with them!" She pouted, wanting to wake you up so bad. You were her best friend! You took her to the park, you helped her baba not be alone, and you gave her a baby brother which she could admit wasn't ALWAYS the best!

"No you may not. They deserve their sleep as well." Damian shook his head knowing that you'd been awake almost all night with (s/n). "When they wake up you can play with them." His tone was stern, yet not too harsh. (D/n) slightly whined, but just nodded and went back to watching her father.

"Talking about me I see?" You smirked, walking over to the pair in front of you, with (s/n) cradled in your arms. You leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to Damian's lips and then to (D/n)s chubby little cheeks.

"Good morning, Beloved, good morning (s/n)." Damian leaned his head back returning the kiss. He gently rubbed the infant's arm, noticing how (s/n) cooed. His eyes wandered to your face afterwards with a slight smirk, fuck did he love you. "How are you? You were constantly up with (s/n) last night." His face showed a slight concern, knowing how exhausted you were with (s/n), he was only a few weeks old but gosh was he a little terror. He pulled out a spare chair, waiting for you to sit down in it.

"Morning baby. And.. I'm doing pretty well. He's pretty relaxed." You chuckled. When you sat down you picked up (d/n) and put her in your lap. When she settled in she immediately began trying to play with her baby brother.

Gosh, did you love your mini family.

"(N/n! Did you see what baba is making me?" (D/n) squealed when you placed her in your lap. She immediately pointed at her father, your husband who was drawing her all of the Disney princesses she wanted.

"It's very pretty (d/n). I hope you are going to say thank you to him afterwards for being so nice." You gently smiled at her, kissing her temple which caused her to let out a giggle.

Damian soon enough finished the pages and sent (D/n) off to color (which she did say thank you). He led you to a more comfortable couch where you both could relax with (d/n) in your eye view and (s/n) in his baby rocker. You snuggled into his side, with your head on his shoulder.

[dollopheadedmerlin]

Valiant

Another screencap! I cycled through a few options for this episode but decided I had to draw this cheesey face he makes lol

Also I hate season one Merlin's hair - why did they do him like that?

For episode one I used cleaner lines and cell shading (can I call it that??) But for this one I went back to using the pencil brush, my beloved. Still feeling very true to life and not super stylized but I enjoyed playing with colors instead.

[m3tr0n0m333]

WHAT PROGRAM AND BRUSHES DO U USE??

I use Procreate !!!

I jump around with brush usage a lot but for more of my recent pieces I’ve been into thinner lineart. The Azzy ref I made is with the Gel Pen (From the “inking” section in procreate) but before that I’ve been using “Fine tip”)

At some point I was an avid “Marker Roll” person, I liked the flat look of the pen.

For this piece I used the “6B Pencil” in sketching for the lineart, (in the “Sketching” section.) And “Flat Brush” (“Painting” section). I like the flat brush for its fade because I’m a finger artist and I don’t have pen pressure. Lol

But I owe it all to my beloved lasso tool which I USUALLY use for coloring and shapes. Sometimes I do dynamic lineart with them (as exemplified above) but other times I use it for purely lineless arts, exemplified below. vv

Usually I do a sketch under if I’m doing the “lineart lasso tool” but for lineless, it’s kind of like layering things on top of each other so I just draw randomly. This probably does not help.

In conclusions, I use a lot of brushes. Mostly for experimentation. But I do like the look of thing brushes if that’s what you’re aiming for ^_^ . Also if you start using the lasso tool it’s literally so fun. It gives you the sharpest edges in your art, which I love <3

[divorcedwife]

Please do you have any art tutorials, especially on colouring, or brushes I can buy?

i never think to take screenshots during my process so it would be easier to explain, but i do it like this : i sketch in a colored pencil, change it to black when i consider it done enough to start adding colors, and then i choose the dominant tones of the drawing. if i want the background to be colorful, i choose it now! if you choose all your colors against a white background but change it last second, it will change the balance completely. by choosing dominant tones, i mean picking either one color or two colors that contrast, and fill the whole sketch with these tones. for example, if im drawing a princess on a white background and i want the tones to be warm, i might fill her whole form with the same red. then i start picking her skin tone so that it matches that warm red, and it might end up being a tone that would look much too saturated and red on another drawing. but here, it looks harmonious. and if i started from a green base, i'd end up with a very different color. see here : a blonde lady wearing a blue dress, but starting from red & green

it's the same way when i paint with real paint ; i don't mix from scratch, i often reuse my mixes and change them just barely to get to the color i want. so if i paint orange flowers, i will add blue to that mix until it's green enough, and it's a nicer color that will match my orange flowers nicely, way more than if i started from scratch every single time

it's also largely a matter of practicing and training your eye to palettes you like, as unhelpeful as that is. i'd recommend looking at the palettes of artists and art you like, seeing how it's balanced, maybe color picking it for practice and see how that helps you think in colors

for brushes ; i do have a couple special brushes, i mostly use procreate defaults (6b pencil my most beloved) but i do have some from this pack (i think it's the right one?), i use sketchy sarmento all the time and it's really nice

[volivolition]

hey so we've been meaning to ask you, which brushes do you use on CSP? the new years event thing they're holding gives out clippy and iirc you said your main brush costed some and we finally like. Have some to spend lmao

-Siam

hello Siam!! :D oooh yes login bonus time!! i have a singular main brush i use and swear by, which is "softBrush♦B8pencil♦DryInk" [10 Clippy] (Content ID: 1944219) aka "SmoooZZz2" <33 it's soft and wispy and a bit textured and it blends very prettily, i've been using it for a long time! (issues are that it's semi-tranparent, so using it for line art can be a bit of a pain lmao but since most of my art is just colored sketches i can get away with it)

a common thread you'll notice with my brushes is that 1) I LOVE SOFT BRUSHES!! and 2) I LOVE PEN PRESSURE!! so my brushes are soft and/or have a good taper to line widths.

some of my others: - "SOIPEN" [Free] (Content ID: 1778407) used to be my old main go-to, real solid brush, but still soft! good for proper lineart, which i havent done in ages hgjkg - "Yokan brushes (羊羹ブラシ)" [30 Clippy] (Content ID: 1944592) or as i renamed it "softie brush" (it used to just be the japanese characters) is what i use for blush and shading. it's really soft, but still has a harder edge unlike an airbrush, which i like! - "SU Cream Pencil" [Free] (Content ID: 1761353) is a classic, such good textures, really solid brush with a good taper!! :3 - i think Turnip Pen is a CSP default, it came free with your xbox /ref, i basically only use this when i need to color something solidly. (i also have a duplicate one with the no anti-aliasing setting. for homestuck purposes. :3) - Rough 6B Pencil is GONE FOREVER APPARENTLY?? i've looked up the content id and there is nothing hgkjg, so sad </3

other things i recommend: - "[UP] R Colour Gradient Set (Hair/Eyes)" [20 Clippy] (Content ID: 1945188) (and their other ones, if you just go check out the creator HamR, i have White and Pink but the Blonde/Purple/Green sets are new to me, i might get them lmao hgklj) are GODSENDS i LOVE messing with these for gradient maps (let me know if y'all need gradient map advice or anything hjglk), they make colors good :3 - "close and fill tool without gaps" [Free] (Content ID: 1759448) is just like. praise be ice cream fill tool, we all love ice cream fill tool!! please get this if you don't have it already, it's really helpful. you just make a layer beneath your line art, lasso your line art as messily as you want, and it'll fill it in for you, it's WILD man hglk - "BOKE brushes" [Free] (Content ID: 1610288) are really pretty for backgrounds if you fiddle with add (glow) and opacity!! - "A brush set that draws clouds" [Free] (Content ID: 1723992) is really good, i love using this for skies <3 this creator (27pt) has a lot of other good assets too! :D

i think that's about it!! clippy does expire eventually, but not for a while! you'll probably find some cool assets to spend it on before then :D in general i think a lot of the free assets are really good, but extra clippy is always nice to have!! i hope this helps, thank you for asking my beloveds!! :] <333 <222

[elavoria]

Billiver Billivin, beloved alchemist—and wizard, cleric, sorcerer, and bard.

Notes, lines, markers, and materials under the cut~

Building out his mess of classes gave me a better idea of his characterization and aesthetics, so I wanted to update my design for him—most notable is the bladed scarf, and I put his veils into a set of four knotted ones around his waist instead of letting them hang loose, both nods to Sivanah—though I couldn’t resist giving him another set of four that flutter around him. The ring I gave him as his bonded object is sadly hidden by the bomb he’s carrying, which he’s perhaps forgotten about…

In an amusing turn of events, he turned out incredibly good at alchemy, so I’ve decided his potions miss the mark because he’s insistent upon mixing up fresh batches when needed and thus rushing his work for his customers.

The potions &c. along the side I took from Ultimate Equipment, and of course I had to include his “world-famous” tonic!

The marker layer is the first bit of coloring I do, then colored pencils for the skin and acrylic ink to touch up the markers.

Not sure I used enough colors in this one… ; p

Faber-Castell graphite pencils, Caran d’Ache Luminance colored pencils, Sakura Pigma Micron pens, Tombow dual brush pens, Daler-Rowney FW acrylic ink.

[emillungs]

Sorry if you’ve been asked this before, could you share what brushes you use? I just love your art and have been trying to learn about that more textured style in digital art. Not just your line art, but the big texture shading you use too AHHH so scrumptious! 🫵🔥 you are a dream machine

okayyy i need to start this by saying im a brush hoarder. i literally have so many brushsets imported because every now and then i download new ones for fresh air but i boiled it down to the ones i love the most so here u go. more info on how i use them below <3

starting with my beloved brush flat rough which i use for sketching, this comes in a paid brushset however if you’re willing to spend $ on brushes i’d say it’s def worth it, the whole set is very yummy. i found this one while i was looking for a marker brush that mimicked the one csp brush i used all the time 🥲

it’s perfect for setting up proportions and establishing interesting shapes from the get go. however its not good for lineart and small details so i mostly use it when i have the intention of covering it up with colors later. my comfort brush fr

and now my versatile queen gloaming (default brush) the only brush that doesn’t make me hate myself whenever i attempt to do lineart. when its used in a tiny size it’s very sharp and has an ink look to it, in medium size it’s perfect for sketching and maximum size it’s great for a watercolor-ish shading style. i also have a modified version where i just changed the brush tip to a round shape and made it more opaque (i used in for the lines in her coat here)

grain is a brush from tasia ms’ set. its gets opaque very fast so its great for doing the larger shadows of a drawing. it has a nice little texture to it and its free (they ask you to log in to the site for you to download it though :()

and theres this one from fatima mandouh which is meant to mimic colored pencils and its literally perfect. it genuinely looks like trad art and it feels so soft while you’re drawing its just 😘👌 no words. and its free!!! i mostly use it for the last steps of a painting but its good for anything honestly, here’s a sketch i did using it:

overall i feel like the real secret to make your art feel more textured is just shading in a hatching style tbh. like seriously just slap the flat colors and build up with a pencil brush trust me. also add a little texture on top of the finished artwork. and add sharpness and noise too. go whack.

[goron-king-darunia]

Eggtober 4th 2023

"Cropped Rainbow" or Asparagus Hollandaise with Poached Eggs

(Clip Studio Paint, Gouache Brush, Gouache Blender Brush, and some messy Pencil brush details to experiment with the shiny look. 16 colors. ~2 hours give or take a bathroom break and some wrist rest.)

One of the eggs broke on the way to the drawing realm oh noooo! Ah well, it's still tasty. As we all know, poached eggs are my fave because the yolks are runny and the whites are cooked but soft and they add rich, fatty, flavor to everything and are a good hit of protein for a healthy dish. This is probably a little more fat in one sitting than you need honestly, what with the butter in the hollandaise, but still. Healthy is relative and this sure as heck is healthier than my breakfast of 2 chocolate bars. (Don't tell God and maybe I won't gain weight. XD) As far as healthy veggies go, asparagus has to be one of my faves. Hollandaise helps anything, but even by itself, asparagus properly cooked (i.e. not overcooked) is delicious. I had a couple ideas for today but most of them were fried eggs because of my inspo board (AKA all the images I pulled up of fried eggs on Google) But mom said "eggsparagus" as a joke October 1st and so I pulled that idea out of the bag today to spare everyone from a week of only fried eggs because God knows I would definitely do that. As for the title, it was funny to me how we have orange, yellow, green and blue on the same piece and how that's kind of the middle bit of the rainbow. Most of the colors were necessitated by the subject but I just happened to pick blue for the background and I liked it so... Cropped Rainbow. (Cough cough I sure DO hope some breadbugs show up to the picnic to sample the eggs. One is ready to be eaten already since it popped open and depending on how much mess the breadbugs mind, they could probably haul all that asparagus back to the burrow for later. Shout out to @lady-quen who has blanket permission to draw the beloved breadbugs stealing or not stealing as many of my eggs as the little guys desire to steal. Been loving the little guys so far!)

And as always, egg for the egg gods. Thanks to @quezify for always drawing such delicious looking eggs! An inspiration for sure!

[starryaike]

HELLOOOO can you please share with the world the program you use for drawing and your brushes??? 🥺🙏 your style is so magical so beautiful so . 💖⭐🌻💫💕✨⭐💖💫✨⭐🌻💫💕💗

Sure! I use Clip Studio Paint, and here's a list of the brushes I usually use:

Artemus pencil - for sketching and lining (sometimes only)

Artemus chalk - for coloring (sometimes only)

Big Pillow Pencil - for coloring pretty much anything! The way I color with this is by putting a base color- usually blue- and then painting on top with this or otherwise another textured brush and leave less painted the areas in which i want texture or shadows!

This brush is my beloved for lineart most of the time, though I've lost the original assets post (I know it was free though, so no worries on that part!)

These brushes are my beloved for sketching! I like them very much they scratch my brain :]

These halftone brushes also scratch my brain

And I think that's it! If I remember anything else I'll reblog this post, and if you have any other questions feel free to ask!

[plusultraetc]

WOW please ignore how much this brush in red looks kind of like blood upon closer inspection. I was trying to do Christmas colors with the green background + red & white letters and it went... questionably.

Anywho, here is the promised advent calendar recap/review (part 1!! to be followed by a very brief part 2 on or after Christmas lol) I've been having a really lovely time opening these every day, and I'm really excited to see what the final four pockets contain 👀

Day 1: All Might pin | Okay, so I actually knew about this one in advance--when I was reading item descriptions on different websites, trying to figure out whether or not I wanted to buy the advent calendar, someone posted a picture of this pin in their review 😭 Which, like, rude ig but it was a selling point for the calendar itself, so I really can't be mad about it. He looks like he's going for the world's greatest fist bump.

Day 2: Iida sticker | Iida truly said everyone out of the way, I have to appear in this advent calendar before Midoriya and Bakugou, and I love that for him. I am a very big journal & planner person so I'm always looking for more stickers, and I already have a small MHA collection where this one can live until I find a permanent place for it!

Day 3: 1-A pencil | Pretty self-explanatory, but I am like. Stupidly charmed by this. It's a really cute addition to my pen cup.

Day 4: MHA keychain | This has been one of my favorite items in the advent calendar. I've actually been needing a new keychain, and I really love the crest-like design. 10/10, flawless.

Day 5: MHA magnet | The first of the magnets! Love love love the color palette of this one, especially the hint of purple in the outline around the letters.

Day 6: Tsu & Uraraka to/from gift tags | These are also super cute, and such a great idea for an advent calendar!! Unfortunately, I don't know many MHA fans irl, so I doubt I'll be using them unless I plaster, like. Two people's gifts with four labels each 😭 One of my friends did dress up as Tsu for Comic Con this year, so she may be about to have A Very Froppy Christmas 🐸 🎄

Day 7: Hawks sticker | HAWKS STICKER MY BELOVED. This one is actually a puffy sticker, which can be a bit of a pain to place in a journal when you want to write on the following page, but they also add some fun dimension so I use them anyway lol. Needless to say, I Love Him.

Day 8: Endeavor puzzle | Everyone I've asked has concurred that this is indeed meant to be a puzzle!! Regardless of one's opinions on Endeavor, it is objectively hilarious that the makers of this advent calendar said 'here is a small picture of this man. Destroy Him.'

Day 9: Midoriya & Bakugou door hanger | Another incredibly amusing inclusion. Midoriya, who is supposed to be the 'welcome' side, looks like he's about to punch you across the continent. Meanwhile, Katsuki "Stay Out" Bakugou looks like he wants you to try it, actually. Make his day.

Day 10: Aizawa & Present Mic bookmark | My personal favorite, the erasermic bookmark. I'm currently using this for book club, and I have zero notes. They bring me inestimable joy.

Day 11: Shigaraki magnetic bookmark | Much like stickers, I always, always need more bookmarks. This one is kinda heavy, but not so much that it's cumbersome to use. However, my dog Hates Him--I say him, not it, because she was also Not A Fan of my Shigaraki figure when I unboxed him, which is weird because she's largely uninterested in the others except for the most recent addition to the collection. I think it's because their more dynamic poses are supported by an extra stand--they're definitely a little shakier and less stable than the others, but that still doesn't explain the bookmark. ANYWAY I've already started using this for my current non-manga read, go little rock star, no ragrets.

Day 12: All Might sticker | TRULY so many W's in a row. I do wish we'd gotten a little more creative with the pose here (it's the same as the one on the pin), but I Get It and I'm pleased with this one anyway.

Day 13: Toga pin | So I actually really love the look of this kind of pin on tote bags, and while I do already have a few of those, this was the point that I became Very Tempted to buy an MHA-themed tote and start yet another collection. Which, I haven't. Yet. Either way, she's very cute.

Day 14: Dabi holographic card | Dabi is the clear favorite villain of whoever designed this calendar, because this little card is literally so cool. Fittingly, he gets ✨dramatic effects✨ and ✨two poses✨ (the second pose is pictured below). I'm not yet sure if I'm going to use double-sided tape to turn this, too, into a sticker, but I think it's really fun either way.

Day 15: Midoriya tree ornament | Cute in theory, but admittedly very flimsy. It is however very seasonally-appropriate and therefore the flimsiness is excused.

Day 16: UA magnet | THIS IS SO CUTE. I absolutely love this kind of 'in-universe' merch, so this is another favorite advent calendar item.

Day 17: Tokoyami magnet | I was surprised that, of all the characters they chose to dedicate a magnet to, it was Tokoyami & Dark Shadow, but like. Surprised (affectionate). Surprised (positive). A surprise to be sure, but a welcome one, etc. This did get stuck to the table while I was taking pictures, but ain't that just the way. Go little rock star x2.

Day 18: Character cards | I don't have a lot to say about these, but they were fun!

Day 19: Kaminari note cards | Again: SUPER cute, and I love the pose they chose (lol), even though I personally don't have much of a use for them.

Day 20: UA sticky notes | ANOTHER FAVORITE, because I Love Stationery, so this is like the UA magnet but better. I would have paid the full price of the advent calendar for these + the erasermic bookmark because I am insane. Okay that might be an exaggeration, but still. Everything else is just almost-as-delightful gravy.

Day 21: Todoroki cardboard standee | Adorable!! I can definitely find a place for this on my bookshelf, so I'm really happy with this one too!

[malleholic]

Hello, I have a question.What app do you draw in? and what brushes do you use?

hai :3

i use procreate my beloved. i create my own brush from the 6B pencil brush, i use edited peppermint sketch brush (my fav), and i use spectra + salamanca paint brushes for coloring!!

[acewithapaintbrush]

I just realized that I have never actually shared the end result of my tattoo. I love it every day a little bit more, least of all because it's actually got some hidden meanings and nods to some important things in my life. It got a bit long (and pretty emotional, oh my) so more under the cut if you wanna know

The colors, rather, the brush strokes in the background. Red, blue, purple and orange. If you know me, you know that I am a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Fan. But that is not a big enough word tbh. The turtles have accompanied me all my life. My first pajama was turtles themed, I wanted to learn to ride a skateboard because of Mikey pretty much all my teen years. But most importantly, and most emotionally for me, I distinctly remember watching a turtles episode from the 1987 cartoon at a friend's house while my mother attended my father's funeral. I don't remember much of that time, only being 5 years old, but I remember crouching behind a sofa and looking over the back of it to watch the turtles have adventures. Maybe that's where it really started, who knows. I just know that these funky guys mean a lot to me for reasons I might not even be able to explain to myself properly. These colors bring me joy, so they had to be there.

And then, the sunflower. I wanted that there because of Mob Psycho 100, an anime that has not just changed the way I look at the world and at myself. I am the protagonist of my own life. My life is my own. If I can change then others can change too. It's easy to want to be easily palatable (is that the word?) for others, to get their approval, to get them to like you. It's taken me some odd 34 years to realize that I only have to be palatable for myself. I have to look in the mirror and see someone that I can get behind, a person worthy of love and friendship and I am worthy of it, everyone is worthy of it no matter who you are, how you look or what you can do. You are worthy already by just being you and even if you aren't quite there yet you are still worthy. We are all worthy of being happy. I am allowed to be silly and cringe and not act like my age. I live my life the way I want.

Because I am the protagonist of my own life and if I don't write the story, who will?

The last one is the crows feather with the green accents. This is a bit of an obscure one. As some of you know, I have written fanfiction for years. It got me through some tough times during high school. Then adult life hit and I stopped. I stopped writing my original stories too. I can't even say why it just felt like a chore, probably because I got so discouraged with my own skills and my own expectations for myself. Then I slowly got back into it, writing a real short one shot for Monkie Kid and realizing that I have missed it quote a lot. And then Encanto came along. This movie that has inspired me so much that it felt like I suddenly couldn't stop writing even if I wanted to.

And then I got the idea for "A place for crows" and the rest is history I guess? The love and encouragement I received where phenomenal. That story made me fall in love with story telling again, it consumed me for pretty much a complete year. And it brought some of the most wonderful people, beloved friends from all over the world, into my life. I am so greatful to this Fandom, to this story, or rather the things this story has brought into my life.

So the feather symbolized my love for writing and just fandom spaces in general, this wonderful microcosmos I can call home.

The brushes and pencil are a given, my love for art and drawing which have also been big factors in rediscovering myself

This text got long, I just typed it down without pausing and I'm not gonna go over it again for spelling or something like that. Take it as it came out of me, with all my love and emotional bloodletting.

Love you all.