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jungwooisms · 4 years ago

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hwarang | jungwoo (teaser)

act ii teaser

pairing: kim jungwoo x female!reader genre: historical au, fluff, angst, supernatural members: nakamoto yuta, qian kun, zhong chenle warnings: crass humor and language, war, almost slightly suggestive content(?), blood, blood consumption (vampires??), historical inaccuracies for the sake of plot progression word count: ~6k a/n: this is shoddy but! spoilers for act ii, the real deal to be posted this weekend!

February 17th, 665 — Seonggwa Inn, Ungjin, Kingdom of Silla You’re working on a small bit of embroidery when the door to your room flies open, Nakamoto Yuta stands there, his hand on the handle as he looks to you. The Hwarang’s voice resounds calmly as the speaks, “There you are.”

“Oh, hi Yuta.” You say, gently setting down the cloth and needle as to not prick yourself, “What brings you to my quarters?”

“I have a letter and a package from Doctor Namekawa,” he reaches inside of his robe for a moment procure the two objects, “both are addressed to you.”

Extended are a folded piece of paper and a neatly wrapped parcel, small enough to fit into the palm of your hand. “Thank you…” You muse, unsure of what is inside of each.

“I’ll be going now,” he says quickly before leaving just as soon as he’d entered.

Without waiting, you open the letter, quickly scanning the contents, savoring each word. Namekawa writes of a medicine he’d concocted to subdue a Fury’s bloodlust, hoping that it may be of use to you at some point. The contents of the package seem to be small, wrapped bags of compressed powder, presumably the medicine. The doctor warns that the medicine only provides temporary relief, no successful attempt had been made to sate bloodlust entirely. For your father who had had the entirety of his tenure in Toehwa-hyeon to create the pimul… Namekawa’s breakthrough surprises you.

Although, now that you think of your home, an idea springs to mind.

“Toehwa-hyeon…” you soon come to a realization. Perhaps documentation relating to the pimul could be stashed away somewhere in your old residence. Just as the though soars through your mind, another voice calls out, this time drifting in through your window.

“Is anyone home?” A voice resounds around the courtyard. It’s instantly familiar, you find yourself stuffing the letter and bags of medicine into your robes before racing outside to greet the visitor.

“Jungwoo,” your heart jumps once you see him standing outside in the blustery air.

“It’s been a while,” he smiles at the the sight of you. From his robes, he procures a letter, “I’ll be honest, I hadn’t expected you to write so soon… I planned to send a response but thought it’d be better to reply in person.”

“How are you feeling?” You ask, glancing to the sun peeking in from behind a wall of gray clouds. “Tired?”

“A bit,” he says with a nod, “But not enough to make it hard for me to pretend otherwise.”

“I see…” you nod, “I’m happy to see you again.” Jungwoo is incredibly resilient at times, at some points to the edge of stubbornness, so there’s a chance that he may be feigning feeling well for your sake but…

He smiles as he always had, glowing with an outright cheerfulness.

“Would you like to come in? I can brew you some tea.”

“I’ll gladly take you up on that offer.”

“I’m so sorry for the sudden intrusion,” he apologizes as the two of you settle into the main hall after you’ve quickly brewed tea in the compound’s kitchen. “You’re too gracious, as always.”

“Before I forget,” he says, reaching for his cup of steaming tea, taking a sip before continuing, “Kangjoon hasn’t made his way here, has he?”

“No,” you shake your head, trying to warm your hands by wrapping them around your teacup, “The last I saw him was in Yeonhwa.”

“That’s a relief,” Jungwoo sighs out as he sets his cup down, “We still can’t afford to keep our guards down though.”

“The compounds seem more… Quiet now than they had in Seorabeol, where are the others?” He asks, looking at the empty room.

“Many of the men are out working, especially the Commander. He’s either in his room or somewhere with the King’s council.”

After a moment of quiet, you turn to him, “…Jungwoo?”

“Oh?” He looks a bit jostled, “What is it?”

“I’m not sure, I was just curious as to what you’re thinking… You seem a bit lost in thought.”

“There’s much to think about, as you can imagine,” he says quietly, “You must forgive me. Spending time with you is too much of a luxury to lose it by thinking and letting my mind wander.”

“I— I didn’t mean it like that,” you say quickly. He has so many things that could be troubling him; the upcoming war, his new status as a Fury, even his arm.

You imagine it to be the latter, considering the duel with Kangjoon seems to be fresh in his mind still.

Thinking of something to change the topic, you recall the letter you’d received just before his arrival. “Jungwoo, Doctor Namekawa sent me medicine today.”

“Medicine?” He questions with a tilt of his head, “Are you ill?”

“Nothing like that,” hand hovering over your robes, “It has the power to suppress a Fury’s bloodlust. Although, according to the letter, it isn’t perfect. It has its limits. Even if it’s not a perfect cure… it did make me think. If we were to look through my father’s old things in Toehwa-hyeon, we may be able to find some sort of research helpful to Namekawa.”

“You’re…” Jungwoo begins but you’re mind is already racing. The likelihood of creating a cure means that when Jungwoo, or another Fury, is stricken with bloodlust, it can be dealt with immediately.

At first, Jungwoo remains quiet, looking into the dregs of his teacup. “I think I should be able to make time to return with you.” He looks to you with a small, hopeful smile, “Surely both Taeyong and Jaemin would be happy if we were able to improve their conditions as well?”

“I need to get approval from Colonel Lee first,” you say, already moving to rise to your feet. “It’ll only be just a minute.”

Taeyong is hidden away in the recesses of the compound when you find him, at first, he seems wary of the prospect of you and Jungwoo returning back to the eastern coast to rummage through your father’s works, but warms at the idea of a treatment for bloodlust. Having the watchful eye of the Naegeumwi looking over you puts him in a lighter mood as well.

It isn’t until the next day that you can venture out towards Toehwa-hyeon, yet when the time comes, you and Jungwoo set out at dawn, eager to find anything that’s been left.

February 24th, 665 — Heo Clinic, Toehwa-hyeon, Kingdom of Silla It has been years since you last stepped into your hometown, and looking at the state of your father’s clinic could tell you as much. Weeds had made home in the space between rocks and cracks, a general disorder radiates from the home itself.

“I’m unsure of what I expected but I hadn’t thought the house would fall into disrepair this fast…” you muse as you make your way towards the entrance, dry weeds crunching underfoot. “How long has it been since you were here last, Jungwoo?” A question to the warrior, but the air remains quiet, “Jungwoo?”

Turning, you see him staring off into space, he seems to catch your movement and looks to you with a smile, “Oh, sorry. It feels like a lifetime since my last visit here… The nostalgia is a bit overwhelming.”

“I see…” You understand that there’s a lot to take in, even the yard is an eyesore, yet something tells you what he’s concerned with is far more serious. Hand moving to the door, you gently open it, finding yourself face first with a cloud of dust eager to make its escape into the open air. “I’m sorry for the mess,” you huff as you motion Jungwoo inside.

He nods solemnly before entering, seeing him in this unsettled state tears at you, you’re desperate to know what’s causing it.

Dust, you find, coats every surface in your home. It clings to your clothes, your hair, and your cheeks as you sift through stacks of documents and notes. Neither of you are certain of what you’re searching for, nor had the insight to tell what could be of use.

“This may as well be in a foreign language,” you frown, setting down another stack of papers, “I barely know what any of it means.” Looking up, you settle your gaze on Jungwoo, a frown pulling at your lips, “I’m sorry for bringing you here, you took time away from your duties to help and there isn’t anything to show for it…”

“Don’t apologize for things outside of your control,” he tries to reassure you, yet the melancholy in his eyes feels thicker than the dust flitting around the room. It’s as if you’re speaking to a shadow.

You know it isn’t your place to ask, but you can’t help yourself, “Jungwoo… did something happen?”

Jungwoo’s expression twinges, “What do you mean by that?”

“You’re not as responsive as you typically are,” noting with a flicker from head to toe before looking him in the eyes once more, “Do you want to talk about it? If you open up I may be able to help.”

Jungwoo holds his breath, and then it all seems to come out in a sigh of frustration, “I’m sorry. After not having seen you for a while, the last thing I would have wanted is for you to see me like this.” A shake of his head before he continues, “The chief Naegeumwi and I haven’t seen eye to eye as of late. Ever since our move to Ungjin, Kun has been racing around the council, participating in meetings with the noblemen most involved in the upcoming war. The tensions are high as to how much aid from Tang we should receive, and no matter how many appointments Kun makes, the council spring cancellations on him without any remorse, or force him to run in circles like a headless chicken…”

“Really?” You can’t help but say the thought aloud. In prior conflicts, the King, along with his officials, had written off a majority of the Hwarang’s attempts to legitimize themselves fully. Hearing Jungwoo speak about the practice still taking place, even though the Kingdom is on the brink of another battle, explains as to why he seems so crushed.

“As their colleague, I feel wholeheartedly embarrassed.” Jungwoo breaks his eye contact with you to look at the ceiling, “One would think the pressures of another entity and an impeding threat would spur them into action and cohesion but… They’ve politicized even their inner circles to the point where nothing gets done.”

“Jungwoo…” For as long as you’d known him, he’d been clever, forthcoming and an overall gentleman. For him to work in the company of those who share neither his ambition or empathy must be nothing less of strenuous. It’s a moral dilemma that calls into question what, exactly, had he been fighting for this entire time.

“Don’t be harsh on yourself,” you say, trying to find the right words to bring him a semblance of comfort. “The Commander will find a way to work something out, I’m sure of it. This isn’t the first time the Hwarang have been treated like this, and it certainly won’t be the last.” Your words seem to reach him, his expression softening.

“That’s a good point,” Jungwoo smiles briefly. “Kun isn’t the type to let the naysayers deter him from getting things done.” Seeing him give you a genuine smile makes your heart race, a sense of relief washing over you.

“I’m glad,” you return the smile.

“About what?” He seems confused by the way his brow furrows slightly.

“I was worried about you,” you relinquish, “You hadn’t seemed like yourself on our way here. But that smile, it’s more like the Jungwoo I know. I’d feel anxious about everything you have to think about too, it really explains a lot.”

Jungwoo shies away from you all of a sudden, turning his head to the side with pursed lips. “To tell you the truth, something else has kept my mind ensnared. Something for which you may not be prepared…”

“Huh?” Brow furrowing as you look to him brooding, “What do you mean…?”

He sighs and looks down to the documents before him, flipping through the pages nonchalantly which only helps aid your curiosity. Fingers tracing circles atop the dusty table before he looks to you, your lips part to question him but before you can— Jungwoo reaches out for you.

Jungwoo all but tackles you, pinning you to the floor before you can step back, kicking up a cloud of dust in the process that stings your eyes. His left hand pulses as he takes your hand in his, your eyes widening.

“J- Jungwoo? What are you doing?” Sweat trails down your spine, and under him you can barely draw a breath. And even when you’d asked him, he ignores you completely.

The two of you remain face to face, his gaze unwavering as your eyes lock together. There’s an eagerness that runs rampant in his stare, though it seems more ravenous than passionate.

An involuntary shiver as your body reacts to his proximity, his eyes eventually close and he begins to inch his face towards you. It takes a second, but you realize what his intentions must be, so you too close your eyes and wait for his lips to find yours.

A sudden gasp and you feel his weight lifted from you, he scrambles backwards, his face becoming pale and rigid from shock. His left arm snaps back to his side as he recalls what he’d just done.

“What did I just do?” Jungwoo berates himself, head hanging as his harsh gaze once again turns soft. “I’m so sorry— What have I done…”

“It— It’s okay,” you say as you push yourself up from the floor, trying your best not to cough from the dust. Jungwoo seems so flustered that you almost feel guilty, you hesitate on how to respond. It feels as if your heart is about to beat out of your chest, Jungwoo was raised as a nobleman, one of the last people you’d expect to try and force himself onto you.

He seems to be as equally confused, by virtue of his grave demeanor, you think it best not to pry.

“I think,” he says as he raises himself to his feet, you following soon after, “That we should return to Ungjin. Sooner or later the Hwarang will worry about your absence.”

A nod and a last look around the home, eyeing spots of sentimental value when Jungwoo lets out a cry of pain and hunches over. His hand slams onto the table before he falls to his knees, grimacing in extreme discomfort.

“Jungwoo?” You ask, noticing that his hair is becoming white, his eyes tinging with a deep red you’d seen in both Jaemin and Taeyong’s stares at times.

“It’s okay,” he says through grit teeth, “If I stay still, eventually thi- this will pass.”

“Do you,” your eyes widen, wondering if this is what you’d heard of from the Fury captains, “Do you need blood?”

Jungwoo’s shoulders jerk at the question, the muscles in his neck strain as he turns towards you. It’s enough to confirm your suspicions. It seems as if he’s displaying a great degree of control, you have a feeling that this isn’t his first experience with bloodlust.

In a moment of clarity, you recall the medicine that Namekawa had sent you, reaching in your robes to grab it. He had written that it could temporarily sate bloodlust, but you know nothing of its full effectiveness or potency. What you do know is that blood is an immediate deterrent, and with your healing abilities, you’re nonplussed about afflicting a minor wound on yourself.

Perhaps Jungwoo may be resistant to the idea, but you see no other way.

“Jungwoo… Drink my blood,” you say and his eyes widen incredulously.

“A-Are you serious?” Jungwoo grimaces, “The thought of doing that to you… It’s sickening!”

“The longer you wait the more agony you’ll be in,” you insist quickly, “Don’t worry about me, you know that I heal quickly so please…”

“You’re mistaken,” he’s fervent, shaking his head adamantly, “This pain is nothing. I simply… I have no desire to drink your blood. If I give into these cravings, I may as well give myself up to madness.”

For all of his charm, Jungwoo sure is stubborn. But as the blood drains from his face and he seems to be on the verge of collapse, you reach for your blade. The steel slices lightly and quickly over the palm of your hand, Jungwoo calls out your name in worry.

As the air hits the wound, it begins to sting, you hold your hand out to him, “Before the cut heals…”

His face scrunches as if he’d been the one to be injured. Yet, he eventually relents.

“Promise me that you won’t look at me until I’m… done.” His teeth clench at his request, you can only assume he means for you not to think ill of him. You nod quickly, glancing to your wound to make sure that it hasn’t closed.

After a moment of hesitation, he gently pulls your hand towards him and you look to the various shelves in the room. His breath tickles your palm just before his lips attach to your skin. The sensation is odd, you can’t help but make a noise of surprise when he begins to drink from you.

“Did I hurt you?” He asks, mouth leaving your palm.

“I’m alright,” you shake your head, still complying with his wish for you not to look at him, “This is nothing, believe me.”

As his mouth finds your wound again, you feel a dull pressure stinging you, but you don’t want to guilt him.

“I can tell by the way that your muscles tense that it hurts,” Jungwoo whispers, sounding ashamed. Another shake of your head before he takes in a long sip and his shallow breathing begins to stabilize.

“Your breathing seems much more calm now,” you note as he stands on shaky legs, his hair returning to its natural hue, “That’s good.”

“There’s nothing ‘good’ about it,” Jungwoo frowns, using his sleeve to wipe away any reach of blood from his lips, “Why must I drink your blood in order to—” He stops himself, shaking his head, “No, you only offered to me out of concern. Forgive my outburst, it was never my intention to blame you.”

Maybe you do deserve the blame, you begin to worry if forcing him to drink your blood overstepped an unspoken boundary between the two of you. An awkward silence drifts through the air as you straighten your robes as you begin to leave.

March 9th, 665 — Seonggwa Inn, Kingdom of Silla During the time that you’d been away in Toehwa-hyeon, orders from the King to march on Hanseong had come. Upon your arrival back to the compound, you find many of the men scrambling to prepare for the upcoming trek.

“Are you almost ready to go?” Kun asks as he passes by your room, you almost hadn’t recognized him with his new uniform. As Silla had solidified its allegiance with Tang, they’d adopted their military style of armor and battle gear to further show their connection. It isn’t an awful design, you’re just used to seeing their blues.

“In a moment,” you nod, not feeling rested as you’d only returned to Ungjin several days prior.

The Commander had said last night that he’d like you to stay in Gochang while the Hwarang march north. Hanseong, a city that technically is in Silla’s domain, had been captured by Goguryeo some weeks ago and the fighting would be hellish. Even after insisting that you could help, Kun never relented in his wishes for you to stay behind. That’s how you find yourself following him through the streets of Gochang towards your new residence some days after the men had begun their march north.

Even if you’re dressed as a man, staying alone in the city is dangerous, especially with the threat of Demons lingering in the kingdom. So, it had been decided, with his permission, that you’ll await their return in Kim Jungwoo’s domicile for the time being.

“This is your first time visiting Jungwoo’s place, isn’t it?” Kun asks as you walk the streets, you notice there isn’t as much foot traffic here as in the larger cities like Seorabeol and Ungjin.

“When we were kids it was always Jungwoo visiting me,” you nod slowly, “I doubt my father would’ve let me leave the village anyway…”

“I see,” he huffs out a laugh, the corner of his lips curling, “Just don’t be too surprised by what you see, okay?”

“What do you mean by that?”

“You’ll see,” he says vaguely as the two of you turn down one of the side roads.

Had Jungwoo not been standing outside of the entrance of the large residence, you never would’ve thought it to be his family home. You find your mouth lying agape as you try and count the number of buildings peeking out from atop the gate surrounding the estate before you return your attention the the Naegeumwi.

“Welcome,” Jungwoo says politely as he looks from you to Kun, “I was wondering when you’d arrive. Please, follow me inside.” The sunlight bares down onto all three of you as Jungwoo opens the gate to his lavish home, when he notices you looking wide eyed at the interior, he speaks again, “Is something wrong?”

“Oh! Uhm…”

“Don’t mind her,” Kun snorts and teases you, “I’m sure she’s trying to decide which room she’ll make into her own little infirmary.”

In a way, you’re almost entranced by the estate; a lush courtyard sprawls in front of the main building, it nearly rivals the size of the block you grew up on. Suddenly, you realize that Jungwoo’s status as heir to Kim Alcheon’s school means more than just a fancy title. Alcheon had been the Sangdaedeung, a man of great power, only topped by the position of King or Queen.

“I hope that this doesn’t change how you perceive me,” Jungwoo says almost shyly as the three of you step into the main hall, “My family, and its privileges, are only happenstance of birth.” You nod your head and he smiles, “Let’s relax for a bit... Chenle should be around here somewhere.”

As soon as his name is uttered, the warrior races out from one of the surrounding rooms, his eyes immediately lock onto Kun’s, “Hello, it’s been a while, Commander!” There’s a smile on his lips but nervousness tinges on the edge of his words.

“Spare the formalities,” Kun sighs and shakes his head, “At ease.”

“No formalities then,” Chenle nods his head eagerly.

“Is your father around?” Kun asks, looking to Jungwoo, “Or his he off serving the King?”

“He’s back in Seorabeol with King Munmu,” Jungwoo reveals, “As of now it’s only a handful of caretakers and I remaining here.”

“Huh, sounds like you can relax a little bit,” Kun says as he looks to you, “This’ll be the perfect place for you to lay low while we’re gone.”

“Thank you for letting me stay with you,” you say, turning to Jungwoo.

“It’s my pleasure,” his smile genial as he continues, “I’m happy to have you.” However, his smile soon falters as he addresses Kun, “How do you expect to fare on your mission? Fortuitously, I hope?”

“It could really go either way,” Kun huffs, crossing his arms, “It depends on how serious Gaesomun is about keeping Hanseong. But if I learned anything about fighting Baekje, we don’t know a damn thing about our enemies until we’re standing face to face with them on the battlefield.”

“Well put…” Jungwoo sighs, “The fact remains that the Hwarang shouldn’t bear this responsibility alone, though.Normally men from the army, or even us Naegeumwi, are meant to organize and lead the armies into battle, yet here we are…”

“Your main focus is to keep the King safe,” Kun reminds him, “Leave the dirty work to us, your time’ll come soon enough.”

A flicker of a smile crosses Jungwoo’s lips, “Something tells me you’re right.”

“In the meantime, watch out for her,” Kun throws you a grin, “She’s a troublemaker.” He nods towards Jungwoo, sneering coyly before quickly rushing out of the home without another word. Almost as soon as Kun leaves, Jungwoo looks to sink into a foul mood, the corners of his lips pulling down into a frown.

“Cheer up,” Chenle says at his friend’s demeanor, “None of us are really happy about how the king’s handling things. Even the legendary Qian Kun can attest to that, there’s going to be plenty of opportunities for us to help out in the war ahead.”

“Yes…” Jungwoo doesn’t reciprocate Jungwoo’s optimism, it isn’t just the Crown that has his worries tied. Ever since he’d drank the pimul he’d promised Sooyoung to not get involved with human affairs. That means if the Naegeumwi were to get more involved with the war effort, Jungwoo can’t enter the fray.

“Since I have to remain in your care for some time, Jungwoo,” you say to distract him from the thoughts you know are sending him spiraling, “if there’s anything you would like me to do around the house, please let me know.”

Chenle sighs airily, “I wish someone offered to my my personal chef.”

“You don’t—” Jungwoo seems flustered by his friend’s statement.

“If there’s anything you’d prefer to have, please let me know.”

“That’s nonsense,” Jungwoo insists quickly, “You’re my guest, it’d be rude to have you prepare my dinner.”

“You’re way too harsh on yourself,” Chenle interrupts, “This is the perfect opportunity to revel in the newlywed life without anyone to disturb you.”

“Newlywed?!” You huff, your eyes widening in embarrassment.

“What are you implying, Chenle?” Jungwoo’s voice rises as Chenle only laughs at him. “Her? As my wife?! I’m not fit to serve as a husband at this time!”

“And I’d never be remotely anywhere near his level for marriage!” You add, feeling flames licking at the sides of your cheeks and up your neck.

Chenle sighs, closing his eyes and shaking his head, “You’re both still on the ‘Woe is me, I’ll never be good enough for the other’ part of your relationship…” His eyes crack open as he looks at the two of you, “From my point of view, both of you are on the same page. And I have to admit it, I’m sort of jealous. Anyway— it’s rude of me to intrude on a lovers’ moment so I’ll be on my way.”

“C- Chenle!” You seek desperately to clear the air before the warrior has a chance to escape but the man is already halfway out the door with a Cheshire grin.

And so, Jungwoo and you are alone, the conversation still bouncing around your brains, echoing Chenle’s sentiments.

“About what he said…” Jungwoo says after a pregnant pause, “Just ignore it, okay?”

“What he said?”

“You know, about living as a couple or whatever he was spewing,” Jungwoo trips on his words, his eyes seeming to look anywhere but at you. “He has a terrible sense of humor, I’ve been meaning to tell him to fix it for some time.” His incessant politeness only exacerbates the tension tangible between the two of you, the heat of embarrassment still clawing at you.

“I understand…” You’ve reached the point where you wish your head could be buried underground and out of his presence for the time being.

“Anyway— Why don’t I escort you to your quarters?” He sighs and begins to walk through the main hall, “If you’ll just follow me.”

After finding your way to your room, Jungwoo leaves you as you unpack quietly, slowly getting accustom to your new quarters. Once unpacked, you return to the main hall to eat dinner with Jungwoo in silence before going your separate ways once more to your respective rooms. You find it hard to sleep, your mind too busy noticing the extravagant décor of the room, much more decadent than any of your accommodations at the Hwarang’s compounds had been.

As you roll over, swaddled in your plush blankets, you can’t help but wonder if Jungwoo is having issues sleeping as well. He spends his waking hours in the sunlight, something you know that drains Furies’ strength. Yet judging on how he’d been on the journey to your hometown, one would be hard pressed to notice any significant changes in his stamina. A testament to his will, more than anything, you’ve come to find that Kim Jungwoo is full of surprises.

However, just like the members of the Fury Corps, the encroaching bloodlust has been eating at him too. It’s only a matter of time until that worsens. You want to do something before that insanity consumes him entirely, but you’re not sure how to help. If there’s a solution, you need to find it quickly.

March 10th, 665 — Kim Jungwoo’s Residence, Gochang, Kingdom of Silla Before you know it, dawn seeps in through the lone window of your room, although it feels as if you’d only just closed your eyes to sleep.

Too awake now to fall back into slumber, you quickly dress yourself and search around the home for the kitchen. When Jungwoo finally finds you, you’ve set out a select few dishes in the main hall, his eyes widen as he realizes what you’ve done.

“Oh, thank you,” he smiles softly and sits across from you. “This is a first, isn’t it strange for you?” Jungwoo asks as you set down a cup of tea before him, “The fact that you’re in my home, I mean.”

“A bit,” you agree, quietly sipping at your tea. Chenle’s words still resonate cruelly around your head, no matter how hard you try to forget.

Once the two of you finish eating, Jungwoo thanks you once more, “Thank you again for doing this, I’m not sure I could have made a better meal if I tried.”

“That means a lot,” you smile in response, beginning to gather the now empty dishes. “Jungwoo?” His name falling from you as you shift the dishes in your hands, “I know it may be difficult to admit but doesn’t walking around in the daylight… hurt you? Don’t you feel any weaker?”

“Ah,” he sighs, closing his eyes momentarily, “It stings from time to time.”

“Then allow me to manage all of the minutiae of the home,” you say, setting down the stack of plates, “I’ll welcome any guests and receive any mail for you. It’s imperative that you feel well so I want you to rest as much as you can.”

“Do you really feel comfortable handling all of that on your own?” He asks, a concerned tinge to his voice.

“Of course, it’s the least I can do in return for you allowing me to stay here.”

“Your generosity is humbling,” his eyes shine as he smiles at you, “I cannot thank you enough.”

September 1st, 665 — Kim Jungwoo’s Residence, Kingdom of Silla Days and months passed quickly, Kun’s letters from Hanseong had relayed difficulty in laying siege to the city, but he seemed confident enough that they would overtake the city soon and he’d be returning to get you and reunite you with the rest of the Hwarang.

Life in Jungwoo’s home had been quiet, with little indication that the Crown is going to send the Naegeumwi of his Sodang unit out. Many of the warrior’s days had been spent resting or training. On this night, you’d cooked a large meal as Chenle had stopped by earlier in the evening and you’d invited him to stay for dinner.

“This is so good!” Chenle cries out, taking a bite of the stew you’d prepared, his eyes, brimming with faux tears, move to look at you, “You’re an excellent chef!”

“You flatter me,” you laugh, waving your hand at him.

“No, really, it was great!” Chenle insists, and then looks to Jungwoo, “I really don’t know how you do it. If I were in your shoes, eating exquisite food like this every day, I’m not sure that I’d let even my mother cook for me again.”

“Again with this?” Jungwoo sighs, “Steering things into an unwanted direction at her expense.”

“Say,” Chenle says, moving closer to his friend, his arm wrapping around his shoulders, “Tonight’s beautiful, the stars are out, the breeze is nice— Why don’t we all go for a drink?”

Before Jungwoo’s able to give a response, one of the servant’s voices rings out, “May I have a moment of your time, Lord Kim?” All of you go silent as the man pokes his head into the room, only then to walk in carrying a folded piece of parchment, “A letter arrived from Qian Kun.”

“Bring it here,” Jungwoo says, extending his hand out to grasp the paper. Chenle and you remain quiet as the servant leaves and Jungwoo begins scanning the contents of Kun’s letter. As he reads, his expression grows more dim, you and Chenle exchange worried glances.

“What does it say?” Chenle questions when it seems as if Jungwoo’s finished reading.

Without a word, Jungwoo hands him the letter. The room stays quiet, save for the sound of rustling paper as Chenle reads. Before his friend finishes, Jungwoo shoots up from his chair and storms off angrily from the room.

“Jungwoo wait!” You call out and chase after him. Whatever was in the contents of that letter had clearly upset him, you cant help but feel anxious from the anxiety. “What did the letter say?” Calling out into the darkness of night as you follow his steps outside, out of the gate of his home and to the dimly lit streets of Gochang.

Suddenly, he stops walking, turning his head over his shoulder to look at you gravely, your breath catches in your throat.

“The Hwarang forces stood no chance in fighting against Goguryeo in Hanseong. They were crushed.” Bitterness saturates his words as you feel your stomach drop.

“Crushed…?”

“It’s a disaster. They’re staying in Kaya now to recuperate from their effort, most of their men are too weak to make the journey back to Ungjin or Seorabeol.” He breathes heavily through his nose as he turns to face you, “Kun asked that I continue to allow you to remain under my care for the time being… or at least until further notice.” Jungwoo then turns once more, returning to his brisk pace as you follow after him.

Eventually you find that he’s led you to a large, empty hall, reading the name atop the doorway you realize that it’s Moon Taeil’s family’s school. It’s where he’d befriended many of the Hwarang and it must hold some nostalgic value to him. Judging by the dust that had accumulated in the corners and on the ceiling, as well as the lack of lamps lighting it, it must’ve been out of use for some time.

The halls lay eerily silent as he walks inside, not a soul to be found anywhere. Seeing this, Jungwoo stomps around once again, gritting his teeth as he balls his hands into fists. The tips of his nails dig so intently into his palm you fear that he’ll break the skin.

“Loyal warriors to the Crown my ass… We’re just dogs!” His voice cries out, reverberating around the empty hall. You flinch as the shrill hiss of steel leaving its scabbard echoes out. Jungwoo begins to swing his sword wildly in front of him, as if he were attacking an imaginary foes breathed into life by the tumult of his anger. It’s almost as if he’s possessed.

A part of you wonders why he’s taking the news so personally, why he’s lashing out at himself. Jungwoo seems bent on letting his aggression consume him, ready to burn himself hollow from the inside out.

Then, he stops, taking a minute to catch his panting breaths as his shoulders move up and down in exaggerated movements.

“Jungwoo…” you call out calmly, trying your best to retain your composure, “Why are you so upset?”

“The Hwarang… and Kun… They weren’t sent to Hanseong because anyone actually expected them to make a dent in the Goguryeo army there,” he answers through heavy breaths. “Silla sent their own men to die so that Tang could rush the enemy from the northern border, the Hwarang were only meant to draw their forces away from Pyongyang. The Tang never got to see the city though, their forces were repelled at Cholsan.”

Although news to you, it seems as if Jungwoo had known for some time that this would be the actual plan of both entities. Upon hearing the news, you’re positive that he had been aware of what that meant for the Hwarang in the detestable agreement.

“And after all these years of the Hwarang protecting the Crown—!” Jungwoo shouts out, “They’re tossed to the wolves! Is this what’s to become of us? For this war are we meant to dispose of our friends in the name of a King who doesn’t care if these men live or die? Just for territory? For superiority?!” It’s clear that Jungwoo is extremely distraught, you were unaware he could ever become this angry.

He heaves out another breath before sheathing his sword and closing his eyes, murmuring, “No… I’m also responsible for this happening. Like the other Naegeumwi… I was complicit and did nothing.”

You wonder if he hadn’t resigned himself to the fate that Sooyoung had offered… would he have been able to make a difference? If he hadn’t agreed to the conditions, maybe he could’ve fought alongside all of his friends. Surely his desire to do so lingers within him…

“Things aren’t as they were… How could they be, really?” You say to him, he cracks his eyes open and frowns. “I know you’re being pulled in many directions, I can see it in your eyes. It’s tearing you apart from the inside.” Voice wavering for a moment as his gaze truly does reflect the anguish he’s suffering, “I know how much you respect the Commander and the rest of the Hwarang. No one believes you abandoned them, nor do you deserve to feel guilty about not being there.”

Perhaps your attempt to comfort may sound hollow, given that your perception of all that plagues him is thin. Even so, you can barely stand to watch him sink into the depths of his own disappointment.

It takes a moment for him to take in what you’d said, but soon his brow softens and a smile curls onto his lips, “…Thank you. You have a knack for cheering me up.” The smile is brief, leaving seconds later as he purses his lips in thought. If you were able to reach inside of him and pull him from this forlornness, you would. It may be selfish, but what can you do?

#this is halfassed edited but :)#not tagging this is for those that find it <3 #also im lazy and this isn’t even the big boy fic

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