#colddisobedience

[storiesofwildfire]

Nothing More than Assets

{ @colddisobedience -- continued from (x) }

⚔️ - “I couldn’t appear so easy, could I?”

Despite the deadpan nature of his tone Winter is smiling, just a faint thing on his lips that grows as Wildfire almost bashfully inclines his head. Assessing eyes note the change, just the hint of a flush on cheeks, genuine in his reaction though Winter knows well enough that Wildfire can play even the most cynical if the other ex-asset chose. Yet, they’d never felt inclined to lie to him. Perhaps because it would only do more damage than good, or because Winter had always been inclined to take hard truths rather than pretty illusions.

It’s a shame to have shattered it with the knife but they had to be quick. Efficient. Though Wildfire does not scream the sharp inhale is just as guilt ridden for the other and Winter looks to him in quiet sympathy, knowing well enough how digging these from his skin feels.

It had been an order, long past, that should he feel he was going to be beaten Winter was to rid of any trace of Hydra from himself. Allow his arm to be shattered beyond use, cut the tracker from his throat. Self disposal to avoid replication, a last resort, but one they’d trained him for all the same.

What good is a unique asset if every side had one? He was to be there’s or no ones.

Well, he had been. Now Winter finds himself with no handler and his priorities laying on chance, a risky manoeuvre but he trusts his partners orders, his partners instinct. Loki always seemed to know who spoke wrongly and he always seemed to know just where they needed to be. Call it magic, tactic or talent he didn’t care. All Winter cared about was them both making it out of this alive.

Still the lingering question remained of just what they would do after. After they had run, after they had escaped. He was not trained for civilian living and despite it all Winter liked the fight. It kept him busy, kept him strong. What would he do without the war and without battle?

The sound of his partners voice pulls him from the thought, tilting his head as Winters gaze fell to the small stain of red across pale skin. Gone with a wave of a hand, just like that. Without Hydra’s command, their control, the soldier had to question just how far Wildfire’s magic could extend, develop and flourish.

It was going to be unlike anything they could hope to weaponise and whilst Winter may wonder on his tomorrow he was Russian. Today was all that mattered now and a day with Wildfire would never be uninteresting.

“I wouldn’t hurt you without good reason, and even then I would make it quick. навредить своему доверенному значит навредить себе.”

The compliment has him raising both eyebrows, frowning down at himself for a moment. He’d liked the reds and silvers, though now they’d be too recognisable. Too much of a link to who he was and who he had been.

The blue is nice, a change the same way he’d change in the choice to defect. Wildfire liking it brings a small sort of smugness to his chest, jutting up his chin and offering a wink before Winter gives them both a final look, no more chances to take another path.

“Thank you.”

There’s a moment of eye contact before Winter is moving again, no time now for sentimentality. It would have to come later, as it often must, because there and then their countdown had ended and just as his feet hit the floor. Tucked easily beneath him to roll from the impact, moving to stand and tug Wildfire from the eruption of flames - their life was gone.

It’s an odd thing to see change happen before your eyes. Even as his expression falls into one of horror and he links his fingers with the others, melting back quickly into a screaming, hectic crowd his gaze settles on burning pillars and crumbling rubble. An echo of sound in his ears as the blast settles into only human sounds.

He thinks he should feel some sort of fear, regret, sadness. Hydra had been his creation, his second chance. Winter doesn’t feel any of that, what he feels is strange. A quickening heart and tightening of fingers against the ones in his. Maybe it’s hopeful but he’d ponder on that later, stepping back in a way that may be mistaken for a stumble and turning sharply. Ducking his head to push through already flailing bodies, clearing a tight path towards the alleyway they needed.

“I am with you, let’s go.”

There are tears and there is chaos, there always is when something like this came so violently. Hydra was clean typically. Bloody, brutal, but clean. The likelihood of civilian injury is minimal without his intervention and Winter side steps emergency personnel, pressing himself and Wildfire to the wall. First responders couldn’t be trusted, none of them could. They would be looking for remains or a trail it was better to be gone.

Winter is silent as they move, not wanting for any surrounding technology to be searching for voices. Instead he keeps his goal on their corner, ducking amongst the survivors and the curious, finally catching sight of the darker quiet.

He motions back, pushes forward and steps around the corner of brick. Breathing slowly so that his heartbeat remains even, letting the look of panic collapse into something colder, calmer. Letting Wildfire move closer to the back for the space he’d need to work his magic with Winter as the shield between them. Old habits die hard.

Winter goes to speak for a second before the sound of footsteps has him mentioning for silence, drawing back further and watching as a small family hurries past. The mother clutching her child whilst the father calls for aid. He has a hand on the knife as his thigh as he waits for their voices to fade, the quiet sound of turning gears their only companion - it’s done simply enough, no threat yet.

“Are you alright?”

Wildfire had been the cause of this. Of the crowds, the fire, everything he knew gone and dead. Laying in a burning street mere steps from them yet he can’t help but grin, manic maybe, shock from everything going on but there’s excitement as well. Relief to know they’d gotten their first success.

Now to survive the rest of the way, find a safe home, enough to get them stable as they began to search for information. Searching for themselves.

It’s something he never cared to do, really. Still, it would be better to know.  

“We need a plan from here. I have no contacts that are not Hydra, unless you do we have to be cautious. We’ll need to scout for a place to lay down low for a few days. Somewhere away from here.”

♔—- His feet hit the ground and absorbed the impact in a way even a super soldier would not be able to handle. Wildfire’s body had been built to handle so much damage, the ground gave way to him rather than the other way around. Small cracks and a decent sized pothole were left behind in the pavement, though Winter’s hand grasping at his own, pulling him away from the building as it erupted into flames, kept him from lingering in the ruined concrete for more than a few seconds.

Even still, the damage he’d done to the road was remarkable, and really, something Wildfire often wondered... Did that strength and durability belong to him? Or had it somehow been given to him somehow? 

Hydra prided itself on Winter, on creating the perfect asset that stood above the rest, indicating that he had, at one point, been a more average human as far as abilities went. Hydra molded him to be something they deemed better, but that... did not seem accurate when it came to Wildfire. They were often so perplexed by him, so unable to maintain their hold on him, and so desperate to duplicate the results of something Loki could do with little more than willing it into existence...

If the magic was his, surely everything else was as well? He’d been found, taken, and weaponized in their favor but not altered in any way other than what they attempted to do to his mind.

Emerald eyes lingered on the building for a moment, as the sound of the explosion gave way to the panicked screams of the civilians and crumbling rubble as the building collapsed in on itself. Loki’s tracker had been atop that building, still on the rooftop when flames engulfed the entire structure. While he did not believe for a second that Hydra would be fooled into believing they were dead for long, there was still a chance that, for a little while, they would have to disprove the theory that Winter and Wildfire had gone up in the explosion. 

It wasn’t much, but it was enough time to give them a headstart, time to teleport away, put distance between this place and them, and find shelter where they could lie low for a while in attempts to get their bearings. 

Unsettling, though, that the sounds of terror and chaos that ran rampant through the streets did nothing to the former asset. It did not instill a feeling of guilt or panic or even disruption. He would have blocked it out in its entirety had it not been so loud. Eardrums pounding, Loki winced at the piercing cacophony, but otherwise held tightly to Winter’s hand, refusing to allow a single thing to separate them.

Multiple people tried, not on purpose, but out of sheer desperation to get as far away from the source of the panic as possible, but every time someone attempted to shove between them, Wildfire only pressed closer to his partner, refusing to give way for anyone or any reason. 

They moved quickly and efficiently as possible through the panicked crowd, though as emergency vehicles arrived, Wildfire found himself pressed firmly against the wall of a still-standing building, the entrance to their needed alleyway not too far to their left. Ducking his head, Wildfire pressed his forehead into Winter’s shoulder, his free hand gripping tightly at the newly gifted clothing that clung to the other asset’s torso. A look that, to anyone passing by who actually paid them any mind, would appear as a couple moving as far out of the way of both the first responders and the flailing crowds as possible. Fear radiated off of the image, one half of the couple desperately burying themselves against the other while their other half attempted to shield them from further danger while offering them as much comfort as possible.

There was no fear to hide, but Wildfire knew as well as Winter, first responders could not be trusted. They very well could have been Hydra agents in disguise, hoping to get to the scene of their assets before the general public could.

Hiding in plain sight had become one of Wildfires best abilities, after all. 

Only once the emergency vehicles passed and no one paid them any mind did they dare push their way to the entrance of that tiny alley. Winter ushered him in first, blocking the crowds behind them from getting to him as he slipped between the two buildings, making his way as far back in the dimmed lighting of the alleyway as he could.

He turned back to speak, but Winter’s signaling for silence, and he’s taken a protective stance that very much indicates he’s willing to use his own body as a barricade between Wildfire and anyone who might enter.

A little family rushed by the entrance of the alleyway, a mother and her child, followed by a man the ex-asset assumed to be the father. For some reason, that image stirred something inside of him, a longing that he couldn’t hope to understand, a gaping hole that was missing in his heart--a child, perhaps? Did he have one? 

The sight of a family desperately trying to remove themselves from the chaos, calling for help as they rushed along, was the first thing to make Loki feel anything at all outside of understanding the importance of Winter and his escape. The urge to push past Winter and assist them came with surprising intensity and for a moment, he stared after them, even as their images faded from view and their voices could no longer be heard. Discipline kept him rooted in place, but something begged for him to go after them.

“Yes...” he murmured, though his mouth ran dry. He had to lick his lips before he could continue and even that hadn’t seemed to help much. “Yes, of course, I’m all right. And you?”

Forcing his gaze to focus on Winter again, Loki’s brief lapse of getting lost in... something... faded, replaced with an easy smile. Perhaps he shouldn’t have been proud or even all right with the destruction and chaos that lingered in the streets behind them, but if it meant getting away from Hydra? It was worth it.

“I don’t have any contacts, at least... none that I can remember, but it never takes long for some of my memories to resurface. Without Hydra’s interference, I hope I can remember something that will give us an edge. I think--” A little frown tugged at his lips. Images of that family came back to him, followed by brief flashes of a massive expanse of water. A sea or an ocean, though Loki could not identify where the image came from or why it’d been triggered by the young family. Gods, he didn’t even really know where the image was located, but it was better than nothing.

“I think we should get as close as we can to the coast,” he finally said, reaching forward to take Winter’s hand again. “We’ll discuss everything once we’re far away from here, all right? Just close your eyes. This will be a bit disorienting, but it’ll be even worse if you keep your eyes open.”

Even as he spoke, energy poured out of his fingertips, brushing past Winter in an almost gentle caress, as if Loki’s magic wanted to place a gentle kiss against Winter’s aura that would result in an all-over tingling sensation. It didn’t linger on the soldier, though, instead of moving to fill the empty space around them both, cocooning them in a cyclone of power that pulsated and slowly began to spin around them, blurring their surroundings until nothing was distinguishable from one another.

[storiesofwildfire]

winter ;; @colddisobedience -- continued from (x) 

⚔️  - “I’m not going to try, I am going to steal it.”

The words are quick, confirming and factual but not cold. He’s never cold to Wildfire, Winter owes the other his freedom, the reason they have the chance to get this information in the first place and he needs to know. His directive requires information, knowledge on that annoying voice in his head that makes his tongue heavy an’ his words slant with a familiarity he doesn’t know otherwise.

Bucky.

It’s a name he knows, he know’s but doesn’t know why and he wants to understand. He wants to find out all he can on this so called war hero, just as they’d found Wildfire’s name. Loki. So much information left, missing worlds, missing people but they had time and with time came opportunity.

This was an opportunity, if that museum had files on this Bucky everyone mistook him for he was going to get them so that the bounding in his head stopped and the whispers of memories left him alone to get a decent rest at night.

Winter wanted to have that part of him the way Loki did, the way it was a thrill to say on his tongue like it fit. Like it was right, a whisper between them of acknowledgement. After all if Wildfire shed their asset training and found who they were and Winter didn’t where did that leave him?

A memory-lacking liability.

Fingers pause over the metal of the knife in hand, looking up from his preparations to see the other leaning against the door. Their door. The safe house temporary but already feeling like something new, something better just because he had the choice to make it that way. The orders to give himself instead.

Freedom was interesting, not having a directive to aim for aside from safety and happiness. No rules or handbook for those, but he was learning, adapting. Like he should be.

But Winter didn’t want to do it alone. For the first time he had a taste of what partnership was. He’d found his mission in that, found his comfort and Loki hadn’t ever failed, hadn’t left him behind or lost him in the dark of it.

They were trust, in their own way.

“Are you coming with me?”

A quiet slide of the knife as he pushes it away because Loki is the only one he doesn’t need weapons with, the only one they fall obediently from hands for. Why would he want them? To harm or to kill - neither of those things are what he ever wants to do with Wildfire.

He gets to choose to be gentle now. It’s the same sort of thrill as choosing not to be. But better, he prefers this. Them.

Hands are warm as he reaches up, follows the line of a soft jaw and flashes a smile that’d have him wiped before. Chases the same head that thawed him the first time in a lingerin’ kiss. There’s hesitance and he wants to know why, Loki didn’t back away, didn’ flinch yet this seemed to stall them for a second.

“Everythin’ okay?”

♔—- She leaned against the door, watching as Winter--as Bucky--made his preparations for the break-in. In truth, it was a good idea. Who Winter had been before Hydra hooked their claws into him wasn’t as unattainable as they first feared, as Bucky had been a rather well-known figure before the time of his “death”. The museum he planned on robbing had an entire World War II section and plenty of archives on exactly what they were looking for.

It wasn’t even the break-in or the plans of a robbery that worried her, but what did? She wasn’t exactly sure.

“‘Course I’m going with you,” she assured him. “I’m not going to let you have all the fun. Besides, you’d be lost without me.” More of a stab at teasing the genuine belief in what she said. Then again, it was sort of a true and fair statement, wasn’t it? Winter loved her, followed her away from safety and the promise of a future, and trusted her with everything he was. Doing things without one another felt strange these days. 

A packaged deal, really.

She lingered on her partner’s gentle touch for a moment, turning her nose towards his palm as he caressed her jaw, and freely returned his sweet little kiss without a second thought. All of those things felt natural by now and some days it still shocked her that Winter was capable of such tenderness. He could be so careful and so thoughtful when it came to her like his entire being had melted just by being with her.

“Yes,” she murmured. “I’m just... I don’t know, really. Fretting for some reason.” Her entire posture relaxed, though she shifted enough so her weight wasn’t on the doorframe, but rather partially on her partner. An arm slipped around him, pulling him a little closer, while her opposite hand lifted to pet his cheek fondly. “This is what we both want, what we both need, and I’ll do whatever I have to in order to get your answers, I suppose I am just worried on what sort of impact the truth is going to have? We haven’t known ourselves for so long. What if we don’t like the people we were? What if we uncover things we aren’t prepared to ingest?”

Even as the worry rolled off of her tongue, it sounded foolish, to fear the truth, to fear what they both wanted for so long and, truly, what they needed. They might have known one another as Winter and Wildfire, but they were not their codenames. They were Bucky and Loki... Whoever those individuals happened to be.

“Whatever happens and whatever we uncover, I just don’t want it to... change what we have,” she finally confessed, realizing for the first time how afraid she actually was of how the truth may impact their relationship. Uncovering who they were could easily change everything and while some things needed to change, there were other aspects of the life they lived that Wildfire wanted to keep intact.

That Loki wanted to keep intact.

“We’re not going to let this impact us, right? Whoever Bucky is, I still want to wake up to him every morning, put my trust in him, hold him on cold nights, and turn to him when I have nowhere else to look.”

She smiled then, quickly brushing away that momentary look of distraught that pulled at her usually so beautifully determined features. “I’m sorry. That sounded horribly childish. Considering I’m the one that pushed for so much change, I shouldn’t be afraid of it. I just--love you. A lot. And regardless of what happens, I don’t want to lose you.”

[storiesofwildfire]

NEVER HAVE I EVER

Let’s play “Never Have I Ever”. Cross out all of the things that you have done. You might just see that there are people just like you out there. Repost, don’t reblog!

tagged by: @lxvingdeadgxrl tagging: @bifrostgold @ofcharredbones @ofimaginarybeings @colddisobedience @wellplighted @inadxquacy @askbluerosegardener @dissolvedshadows​ and whoever else would like to!

     SEXUAL

Never have I ever kissed a girl. Never have I ever kissed a boy. Never have I ever received/given a blowjob, hand job, eating out. Never have I ever had sex. Never have I ever fallen in love. Never have I ever cheated on someone. Never have I ever been cheated on.

     LIFE

Never have I ever gotten into a fight. Never have I ever done something illegal. Never have I ever gotten wasted. Never have I ever used an illegal drug. Never have I ever snuck out. Never have I ever stolen something. Never have I ever vandalized something. Never have I ever lost a family member due to death. Never have I ever been in a life or death situation. Never have I ever been arrested. Never have I ever been fired from a job.

     EMOTIONS

Never have I ever been kept up at night due to guilt. Never have I ever laughed so hard I cried. Never have I ever been abused physically. Never have I ever cried myself to sleep. Never have I ever wished that I was someone else. Never have I ever wanted to kill myself. Never have I ever tried to kill myself. Never have I ever felt like an outcast. Never have I ever wanted to do something just so I would fit in.

     FRIENDSHIPS

Never have I ever ruined my friendship with someone. Never have I ever had a friend leave me for other people. Never have I ever been kicked out of a friend group. Never have I ever wanted to fuck one of my friends. Never have I ever been friendless.

     SCHOOL

Never have I ever failed a test. Never have I ever cut class. Never have I ever had to eat alone. Never have I ever failed a course. Never have I ever been suspended. Never have I ever received detention. ( or whatever the equivalent would be in Loki’s studies ) Never have I ever dropped out of school.

[storiesofwildfire]

Character Study

BOLD   WHAT   APPLIES   ,    ITALICIZE  WHAT  APPLIES SOMETIMES.

tagged by: @lxvingdeadgxrl tagging: @ofcharredbones @dragetunge @algrimthestrong @bornofbloodandwater @ofimaginarybeings @nottobecrossed @colddisobedience and whoever else would like to!

likes  artificial  watermelon    |    sleeps  in  what  they  are  already  wearing  |    eats their cereal with milk  |  listens to music with earbuds  |   hates  the  summer   |   can  recite  past  the  first four  digits  of  pi    |   eats frosting out of the jar |   doodles on their notebooks   |  can bake cookies |   has a garden   |   has had a snowball fight   |   eats pancakes without syrup |   prefers shorts over pants    |   can  name  more  than  ten  superheroes ( unfortunately )   |    has  a  plan  for  the  zombie  apocalypse  |   uses the same password for everything   |   can’t  hold  their  breath  for  more  than  fifteen  seconds   |   watches  anime  |   hasn’t read harry potter  |  can say ‘ I love you ‘ in more than one language |   prefers  mechanical  pencils    |     thinks  space  is  cool  |    takes  personality  tests  more  than  once  to  make  sure    |    can’t  tie  their  shoelaces    |   has a purse   |   likes salads  |  likes  cool  colors  better  than  warm  colors   |   knows how to braid hair  |  reads  biographies  |   can ice skate    |    knows their mbti   |  reads astrology charts  |    prefers the star wars prequels to the original trilogy ( more or less because Loki has a crush on Obi-Wan okay )    |   plays video games  |     reads the newspaper   |    likes chocolate ice cream best    |   doesn’t cuss   |  memorizes song lyrics  |   collects  coupons    |   has a preferred order at starbucks   |  likes movie theater popcorn  |  has seen a play  |   listens  to  music  with  headphones  |  owns a hoodie ( don’t tell anyone... )   |   would  rather  own  cds  than  online  copies |  has  written  a  poem  |   can shuffle cards  |   subscribes to a magazine   |   double  dips  when  eating ( if they aren’t sharing, sure, why the fuck not? )  |   drinks  directly  out  of  the  milk  container   |  keeps a journal