#coinflip gods

[inkclover]

wooooo made some gifts for a secret santa in the server weehoohhhh

note: prismo/scarab/nightmo piece under the cut

server wizards came up with the trouple name - coinflip for these trio… it’s so cute!

[t3a-gh0st]

So I was looking at the lyrics for Destiny Strange and Sublime and

"The things I craved before Have faded into fog"

HELLO!!!! CRAVED?? FOG???

I know someone who fades into fog :)

[mouriros]

QSMPSTUCK!!!!

but its mostly qjaiden cuz ive had a 7month hyperfix on her

[captorations]

fuck. goddammit. cancer cult that has basically turned themselves into trill from star trek. that may as well be magic and i am disappointed. it also leaves an obvious route for baru to not just be crazy, but i hold out hope that tain hu will stay dead

[yume-fanfare]

💞💞💞 everything is ok peace and love

[goodmorningdove]

also there is a song called The Happiness and Peace of Mind Committee and i don't know if you've listened to it but i think it is very much pyrite's vibes. maybe pyrite if she had a bad day and went just one shade more totalitarian.

damn that IS a pyrite song!

especially before she met chalia

[rindomness]

this is a uhhh scary marlowe blog now bye bye everyone else sorry you have to leave

[sexhaver]

Boston driving tips:

if you're making an unprotected left at a stoplight and are the first one in line when the light turns green, your job is to gun it and make that left turn before any oncoming traffic has an opportunity to move. otherwise you will sit there throughout that entire fucking light, forcing everyone behind you who wants to go straight to merge to the right (which of course gums up both lanes), until it turns red again and you awkwardly finish up your turn while the entire intersection glares daggers at you. if you pull this shit on a one-lane road, then congratulations, you made it so you were the only one to make it through on that light cycle, and the drivers behind you are not only allowed but actively encouraged to pit manuever you off the road if they can catch up.

for optimal performance, you should be looking at the signal for the cross street + the walk signal. once you see the cross signal turn red, hold down your brake with your left foot to free up your right foot to hover over the gas pedal. that way, when your light turns green, you can simultaneously lift your left foot while dropping your right to instantly start moving. this maneuver has many names depending on where you learn it. i learned it as the "Worcester left" but ive also heard it referred to as a "Lexington left".

if you're in the left lane and one person passes you on your right, there's a 50/50 shot on which one of you is the asshole (you for driving too slow in the passing lane, or the passer for being a speed demon)

if two people pass you on your right, you are the asshole and need to merge right at the soonest opportunity to avoid further embarrassment

if THREE (or, god forbid, more) people pass you on your right, pull over to the nearest breakdown lane at your earliest convenience and commit seppuku with a tire iron

become intimately familiar with the exact size of your car and how close you can get to stuff without hitting it. this proprioception is helpful when parallel parking but is mostly for those times when someone is trying to turn left from a single-lane road, and they pull off as far to the left as they can without going into oncoming traffic to let people around them, and then the person behind them spends a few seconds trying to fit their 6-foot-wide car through a 9-foot-wide gap before concluding that this maneuver is sadly impossible. don't be that fucking guy

learn how to parallel park. yes i know it's stereotypically scary but there is a method you can learn and it will save your ass so many times. just line up your car's side mirror with the side mirror of the car in front of the spot you want, cut the wheel all the way towards the curb, move for a bit, stop, cut the wheel all the way the other way, resume, wham bam thank you ma'am

you can ignore like 80% of all "no parking" signs because they all say NO PARKING in huge bold letters and then under that in 8pt font they add "every second Tuesday of every month during lobster season on odd sides of the street only from 7-9pm". or it's "reserved" parking for an event that already happened or hasn't happened yet (they put the effective dates right there on the sign)

turning right on red is technically legal at a state level in MA, but most intersections in Boston will have a cheeky little "no turn on red" sign hidden somewhere as a fun Eye-Spy-type game for kids to play on road trips. if you don't see one of these signs, it's a coinflip whether you just missed it or if you can actually turn right

are you moving into Boston for college? you should definitely rent a moving van for your stuff and then follow your GPS directions that take you down Storrow Drive. nothing bad has ever happened to moving vans on Storrow Drive

[derww]

DAY 28: POSESSION

CW: Death, violence, religious themes

He wakes up and feels a knife by his throat.

Firstly he panics, but then sees the person holding it and it's Mapicc – in Spoke's body, but it's still Mapicc. After that, he calms down instantly.

– Pina colada, - he says and the weight on his neck disappears. Mapicc nods and pulls a knife away.

– Welcome back, Zam.

It cannot be said that everything is fine with Mapicc himself too: he has never been able to get used to the inability to see clearly beyond his nose, the desire of this pathetic body to complete deformation and the continuing flow of the inaccessible but too great power of God in the blood. His center of gravity had been knocked down, and Spoke's twin blades, instead of the falcata destroyed in the explosion, were too light for the comfort and lingering blows. Zam gives him his saber, taken from the corpse, but even it lies wrong in insufficiently material fingers.

It's a coinflip every time – who will wake up, who is responsible. Zam was stronger, more tenacious, but Spep was also breaking through from time to time. They were afraid that one day it would be Minute who would wake up. It never happened but they couldn't afford to let their attention wane. Their worst enemy in the middle of their base is a death sentence.

Sleepwalking, Zam was unstable in his activity and could pass out half a step away. But he refused to give up – he wrestled control for himself, adapted to the sword from Minute's corpse, and moved step by step.

Jumper was standing against them. And two immortal gods with their wings torn off. Void and chunkban were the only ways to solve the problem, and they burned too many Ashes bookbans to deal with them themselves. At least while they have another option.

Mapicc had to learn to identify each of them by vague figures, Zam had to study how to faint safely, and Ro had to withstand the loads and fight over and over and over again. Only Clown looks as always, but even his hands are gradually starting to tremble.

Jumper is chosen by the gods, and they feed her with divine apples and crown her with a laurel wreath, and black and purple and red ribbons are woven into her cropped hair. She has no shortage of armor, she always has the exp bottles and golden apples, she almost creates potions out of thin air and never removes bright pink elytras. But she is still mortal. Unlike Ash and Squiddo, Jumper is still mortal.

Zam refuses to sleep. As long as the body belongs to him, he uses it, no matter how exhausted it is. Spep's body is not his own, it is weaker and more vulnerable, it is not hardened in endless battles and days of grinding, and one day Zam exhausts it so much that Spep who wakes up in his own body next cannot even move a limb.

They manage to push Squiddo into the void, but before that, she point-by-point blows up Mapicc on the spot. This time it's Zam who has to grieve for his dead partner, but he just doesn't have time for it. He and Ro have to climb out of another chunkban, and he is knocked out almost immediately after. The next time he wakes up, it's Clown who's holding him and asking for the password. Zam thinks wearily that he would like to cry.

Instead of two gods, there is only one now – and Jumper, she is still here, angel wings and one more ribbon in her hair – and Ash is noticeably gloomy, carrying a bible of saving the world under his arm. In such a man, with pointed facial features and dark eyes, black lightning burns from the Bhaal sunk deep into the skin are especially noticeable.

This time, Ash throws an inventory ban at Clown, and Clown doesn't even have time to say anything. While Ro cuts Jumper off, Zam writes a first book for the bookban with unnaturally icy fingers and then breaks the shulker on the build limit right above Ash. When he finally gets down and reunites with Ro, he can barely stand on his feet, and Ro, taking on some of the weight, brings him back to their base. Home. Zam's pupils roll up halfway through, but he finally falls asleep only inside the base. Ro leaves him on the bed, making sure he doesn't break his neck or swallow his own tongue, and only then allows himself to take a break.

This is... Exhausting. It wasn't the first time Ro had been involved in a war, but never before had it demanded to give it his all. This war had been going on for a month, and every new day was full of deadly dangers and demanded to give everything for the sake of a ghostly chance to achieve something.

But they almost did it. Jumper was left completely alone. Neither Squiddo nor Ash will be able to help her, and the world border is so small that they can always find her. And Branzy still hasn't revealed himself as their ally...

Just a little more, and he can finally get it over with. Kill Jumper. Destroy the world. Retire. See Mapicc again. He nods to himself. Take a rest, and then end the world, reminds Ro to himself, and then passes out.

Zam wakes up before Ro does. He moves with both mechanical and slightly awkward movements. For some reason, there is no pupil in his whitened iris.

[ultimate-marysue]

Gotham Funger AU

For the uninitiated: Fear and Hunger (lovingly called Funger) is a duology of survival horror games featuring a similar world to ours with its own mythology. The name comes from the Fear and Hunger meters in game that, with the body meter will put the horror in surviving. It is infamous due to its difficulty and unfairness, since there’s no tutorial at all and everything can kill you, give you nasty statuses or make you lose limbs. Other claims to fame are its coin flip system that can randomly insta kill you and random generated loot (it resets each playthrough so some runs are wildly different from others depending on luck), a combat system based on chopping the enemies’ limbs (and them chopping yours off, permanently) and the games let’s just say very NSFW and violent nature. A gimmick in the first game is an orgy that heals your body and a cannibalistic feast that restores your hunger meter.

With all this in mind, here’s my idea for a funger game set in Gotham (part 1, plot and setting):

It all begins as Gotham is being evacuated (Arkham Knight style) due to Joker’s threats to gas the entire city with Joker Venom in three days. The main objective is to shut down the different gas production and distribution points across the city and defeating Joker. This is complicated thanks to a variety of Rogues accidentally or purposely blocking the way and causing their fair amount of chaos.

Due to the evacuation the streets are mostly deserted, and as the days pass the get more and more empty. First day morning you may still find some random citicens, from then on, it’s just thugs and jokerized monsters. As the days pass, previous thugs you hadn’t sent to jail get jokerized and jokerized victims get more and more monstruous following these stages:

Smiler (still mostly human, just stronger and “crazier”. They have bloody smiles and other joker features. A variety is the Brawler, bigger in size)

Agent of Chaos (humanoid but definitively no longer human. They’re tall and twisted, with more teeth. Still capable of human speech, they’ll use it to drain your Fear Meter. On a coinflip attack, they can carve a joker smile into their enemies preventing the use of rebreathers and causing damage each time you eat)

Harbinger of Madness (No longer humanoid, several mouths carved into their body, coinflip attack will eat one of your limbs resulting also in a permanent sanity de-buff),

Abomination (only on the third day, just a horrible blob off meat and smiles. It doesn’t do anything but drain your sanity, if you don’t kill it fast enough or have the ability to flee it will completely deplete your sanity meter and the character will begin the jokerization process)

All of the Funger Gods are real and exist in this world (but those that died in previous games are either forgotten or don’t hold real power) Current Gods prancing about would be: Sylvian, Gro-Goroth for the old Gods (Rher, Vinushka and God of the Depths confirmed dead by the end of Termina), All-Mer, The God of Fear and Hunger, Machine God and Sulfur Gods for Ascended Gods (All-Mer should be dying and confirmed dead by the end of the game to reflect how organized religion is dying out in this trying times).

Joker would be considered a servant of Rher, God of madness, but much like Per’kele, his real master is the God of Sulfur. Rher is dead, but madness, destruction and chaos take form in the new God and also his servant. Or at least that’s the general interpretation. Joker is actually a manifestation of the God of Sulfur, that’s why no one knows his origin and seems to be unkillable. His plan is to sacrifice the entirety of Gotham to properly finish his ascension to Godhood on Earth.

Much like in previous games the characters can cause the ascension of a new God to the pantheon: Gotham, Lady of night, cities and Justice. Basically, a Goddess that represents the path of modern cities and gives her favor to the vigilantes that protect them. She’s a good entity for the most part, but not a kind one. She is big cities given form, which means she also stands for all of the filth and depravity found within their streets. To achieve ascension and completely vanquish the Joker a character must become her Dark Knight by raising their affinity to maximum. This path will obviously be easier for Batman, but technically each batfam member could take his place (will discuss in a different part).

From a map perspective I would use the No Man’s Land map as a base. As any Funger player will tell you: the crazier the map, the better. Some areas would be completely inaccessible to make it more manageable. Other parts of the City might be only temporarily inaccessible or only accessible to certain characters. Some of this means may be: Joker or Fear gas (you’ll need a re breather), land mines (you will need a character with gadgeting or mechanic skills to disarm them), locked doors (keys, lockpicking, fighting the door, chainsaws/axes), chains (Bolt cutter, keys), blown up buildings/heights (Grappling gun).

The Bat cave acts a bit like Prehevil Bop and Donovan’s house. It’s quite a ways away, which deters the Bats from depending on it. It holds different pieces of randomly generated gear, a hexen table, ritual circle, a chest, and the Bat computer serving as a bookshelf. There are safe sleeping cots and Alfred will bring you a drink/food as needed. Other semi-safe spaces include: Jason’s safe house, the clock tower and Harley’s (a bar Harley Quinn has taken over)

Different locations may hold different resources like ritual circles, computers, side quests, main plot objective, but also enemies and rogues: Two-Face at City Hall’s Court, Penguin at the Iceberg, Killer Croc in the sewers, Poison Ivy at the Botanical Garden, Scarecrow at Arkham, and Riddler can’t be found physically but you can find riddles all over the place. The bats must balance dealing with all the rogues destroying the city while stopping the bigger threat of Joker. To be able to arrest any enemies you need to clear the GCPD headquarters (They can randomly scape) or for a more permanent solution, clear Arkham Asylum.

Part 2: Rogues

[zmediaoutlet]

They ended up south of the hospital mainly because Dean had to pick a direction when they pulled out of the lot and, considering the day he’d had, a coinflip was as good a way to make a decision as anything. A motel even if it’s two in the afternoon, and two beds because it’s always two beds, and he drops his bags on the one closer to the door and wants to flop face-first straight into the ugly brown comforter but he feels like if he falls he’ll never get up again. His shoulders and low back and the arches of his feet all hurt. He hardly even had to fight, today. Go figure.

Sam’s flicking the light in the tiny closet, checking the mini-fridge, casing the bathroom. “Huh,” he says, for no reason Dean can tell. Drops his bag on the luggage rack and shrugs out of his jacket. Absently pops his neck. Says, then, “I could eat, you want—I don’t know, delivery something,” like he didn’t almost check out on Dean, like he didn’t disappear in the middle of the night like every one of Dean’s worst nightmares, like in the middle of driving about ninety through too-crowded city streets Dean didn’t get a call on his cell from an unknown number and about have a heart attack when the woman on the other end said Mr. Smith, you’re listed as the emergency contact for Mr. Sam Smith. I’m afraid—  Like the world didn’t just crackle out to static right then.

He’s standing there, though. On two legs and with his back up. Going for the yellow pages under the room phone, flipping to the back. “Number One China Palace,” he mutters, and glances across at Dean, and is alive. Alive and walking around and his brain where it’s meant to be. He frowns, the phonebook dangling against his thigh. “You okay?” he says, and Dean says, “Yeah,” and then he says, “God,” and then he sits down hard enough on the bed that he almost bounces, and he plants his hands on his knees and has to breathe, in through his nose and out through his mouth. Acid roiling up his throat. He wants a drink so bad he could kill something.

“Dean?” Around the bed, crouching. Alive and compos mentis and hovering a hand over Dean’s leg, like he’s worried Dean’s hurt somewhere he can’t see. Except, no, that was Sam—that was Sam all this last goddamn year, or longer, all this time Sam’s head was crumbling or boarded up but still crumbling behind or trapped in hell with a shark-smiling sociopath wearing his face or even before, when he thought he had to die to prove something to the world, or when he had to rot himself to prove something to Dean, or when—Dean takes another deep breath and blows it out extra slow, his heart doing something weird in his chest, and Sam stops with the hover-hand crap and grabs his thigh, frowns up at him, says, “What—hey, hey.”

“I’m not having a panic attack,” Dean says.

“Looks like it,” Sam says, but sits back on one heel, and the death-grip on Dean’s thigh turns more into Sam just—keeping a hand on him. Heavily warm. “You good?”

Dean fishes in the inner pocket of his jacket and finds the flask, takes a pull. Sam’s eyes tighten but he doesn’t make a comment. The whiskey’s crap and it burns all the way down but he feels like he breathes better after. Sam watches his face, his hand sliding a little up the side of Dean’s leg. Like he hasn’t—god, since before Cas pulled that shit-ass trick with Sam’s wall. Dean wants to pull Sam up by the wrist and fall backwards on the bed and sleep for a goddamn year, Sam laying heavily over him like the worst sweaty-nasty suffocation torture Dean ever accused him of being, when they’d share beds sometimes, and Sam would roll his eyes and pull Dean in by the small of the back and Dean slept better than maybe he ever had. Why did they ever stop that. What would it take, to go back.

“And it’s really all just—gone,” Dean says, picking up the staggered confused stupid back-and-forth they’d had back in that awful hospital room, while Cas moaned shaking on the bed and Meg held him grimly down. “Just like that.”

Sam’s cheek sucks in on one side. “Not just like…” he starts, and then looks at Dean’s face, and his chin drops. “But—yeah. I’m okay. Not even that tired, for some reason. It’s just you and me in here, I swear.”

It always was but the way Sam says it makes Dean’s shoulders ripple, like someone’s standing directly behind him, watching. He shudders totally without meaning to and Sam’s head picks up and he shifts forward, kneeling, his hands going to Dean’s knees, gripping firm. “Don’t get hit by a car again,” Dean says, and Sam huffs and says, “I’ll do my best,” and Dean reaches forward and grips Sam’s shirt and feels Sam’s skin warm under it and says, “I mean it,” and Sam looks him in the eyes and doesn’t say that Dean’s being a dumbass and doesn’t even seem like he’s thinking it, really, and he says, “Yeah, Dean,” and, “Okay?” and Dean doesn’t know the answer to that. It has to be yes because Sam’s alive and here and that makes it a ranked good day, by Dean’s usual metric, but the time when he wasn’t isn’t far enough in the rearview for Dean’s taste. That white hospital room and the white bed and Sam sitting there like he didn’t care so much about the difference between alive and not. When the difference there, for Sam, was the only thing in Dean’s life that had ever mattered. When it was pretty much the only thing he was hanging his hat on, these days, and if it came to it, if any time between now and the shitty future Dean could see, the answer flipped from one to the other, Dean didn’t know if he’d be able to make it in the world that was left, after. He just didn’t see how that could be so.

Sam watches him, quietly. Tightens his grip on Dean’s legs and then stands up. “I’m ordering Chinese,” he says, steady. “Gonna take a shower. Find something to watch, huh?”

Dean blinks, wipes his hand over his face. “Yeah,” he says.

“We should’ve gotten a king bed,” Sam says. He half-smiles, when Dean looks up at him. “So you won’t bitch about kicking.”

“Wouldn’t have to if you weren’t Chuck Norrising in your sleep,” Dean says, and Sam really smiles, then. Goes for the phonebook, and the Chinese. Ordering extra broccoli, the bitch. Dean grips the edge of the mattress, and manages to stand up after all, to deal with his bag, to find the remote. Sun coming in through the gaps in the curtains. Sam, smiling at something Dean can’t hear. The rearview feeling, for a minute, a little less crowded.

[deliriousequanimity]

First Interaction with Hermes

(using a coinflip to determine answers, heads = yes, tails = no)

Me: Uh...should I be afraid of you...?

Hermes: *serious* Yes.

Me: *nervous* Wait, what- really?

Hermes: Haha, no! *laughs*

Me: *realizing I have been pranked by god*

[lexcellence]

Is yugioh a good game? I've only seen the anime.

oh god no.

listen, the thing you need to understand is that it was never meant to be a real game. Yu-Gi-Oh started out as a game-of-the-week horror manga with a premise that can best be described as "what if Billy Batson transformed into the killer from Saw." The card game (at that point called Magic and Wizards, changed for fairly obvious copyright reasons), didn't show up until the ninth chapter, and then they kept doing other shit for like the next twenty-five. It only got brought back because there was such a large fan response to that chapter (largely because of everyone's favorite Batman, Seto Kaiba), and then they went back to doing other shit until the mid-fifties, when the focus shifted almost entirely. The reason the rules were so different in the Duelist Kingdom arc of the show was that the rules weren't even finalized until the second season. There were two (well, one and a half) entirely different versions of the game before Konami got the license, and crafted the version we have know. Even looking at the early video games, there are two or three entirely different formats before we finally got something based on the rules of the physical card game. I can't stress this enough — it wasn't a real game, it was a plot device that became wildly popular out of nowhere.

Once it *was* a game, they had to contend with the fact that it wasn't very well balanced or thought out, and shit got messier when you looked at the show. All of the big flashy monsters the main characters used were hot garbage in any situation that didn't involve telling a story, and the things that weren't garbage were outright broken and quickly had to be limited or banned outright (for example, the Spell card Pot of Greed, which allows a player to draw two cards from their deck, and add them to their hand. Great when a goth ghost needs to show his faith in the Heart of the Cards, less great when nerds like me start throwing around shit like "a free plus one."). It didn't help that real life games took between twice and four times as much time to play.

So, early YGO was slow as hell, which was its own pain in the ass, but these days? After two full decades of power creep and needing to sell the newest set to an increasingly older player base?

Now the game is a coinflip. You either go second or you lose, unless your deck has an option for a Zero Turn Kill instead of a First Turn Kill. Effects have gotten so intertwined and convoluted and, frankly, incestuous that they've gone from "draw 2 cards" to legal contracts. There's no grace, there's no elegance, there's just a nonstop autistic deck-measuring contest.

Zero out of ten, I'll play it until the day I die.

[babacontainsmultitudes]

Pssst hi baba!! :D I wanted to toss a silly thought to you. Glenn and Jodie take the s1 kids to the beach (probably non-magic au). Glenn helps the kids bury a willing Jodie in the sand. I think they did a coin toss for it which Glenn won. The sand is shaped into the classic mermaid style. Probably has a sand sword in one hand and a guitar in the other. Later, Jodie and Glenn also prepare a water balloon fight. Jodie teams up with the kids against Glenn for a bit until Nicky and the twins switch sides. Feeling chilly today so I'm channeling the summer vibes haha

Hi Countless!!! THIS IS SO CUTE. I'm particularly weak for beach-related stuff cause the stuff during the beach episodes with the S1 kids (spooky stories, driving lessons, etc.) makes up some of my favorite moments in the show 🥺.

Hehe I can imagine the smug look on Glenn's face when he wins the coinflip. You said a sword but I can't help imagining a trident for Jodie King Neptune style hahaha (fuck this is making me think of mermaid AUs hehehehehe I'm such a sucker for mermaid AUs god damn it I'm a simple gal). Also thinking of Glenn teasing Jodie and making the kids laugh the whole time and Jodie feigning annoyance (but really he's having fun, and happy to see Nicky having a good time with the other kids).

Aaaaw and the water balloon fight is really cute too <3. Love the twins and Nicky switching sides to help Glenn- for a small sec I was like "hm is that unbalanced?" but actually I think Grant and Terry would be quite effective in a water balloon fight tbh haha (*especially* Grant he doesn't miss lmao).

:3 Thanks for the ask Countless!

[b33tlejules]

Fucked up bingo Chargestep

Had to do a coinflip and chose for it to be Teo/Julia chargestep because I need to be more insane about Teo here.

Teo is hopelessly charmed by Ortega. She so badly wants to stay invisible, unnoticed, unbothered, but god Ortega just sees her anyways and it feels like the best thing in the world. Its terrifying. It's humiliating, how easily Ortega has wormed her way back into Teo's terribly shattered life but. Maybe it's not a bad thing? As long as she keeps lying about not being telepathic anymore, Ortega doesn't need to know a thing. Nothing can go wrong. :)

Here's a song I associate with them, just for you.

[goodmorningdove]

wait is pyrite the fucked up and evil fox god the same pyrite as pyrite cyan of the coinflip gods?? if not then what do they think of each other?

they are the same! Pyrite is a pretty good boss when things are not going bad! She's pro unions, pays an above living wage and abides by all disability accommodations.

issue is if she cant keep you happy, (like if you have chronic depression or are stressed due to the imminent collapse of the world) she kills you. Be Happy Or Else.