#claire's work
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kyaroscuro · 8 months ago
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All About You
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Maybe it's all about you when your youth is filled with each other's names and your heart has never changed. That's what Juyeon finds out when he falls in love with his best friend.
pairing : bff!juyeon x gn!reader (+bf to ex!sunwoo) genre : fluff, bestfriends to lovers, slow burn, slight angst but happy ending warnings : swearing/cursing, sex jokes, implied sex, mention of burnout, alcohol consumption, heartbreak, pet names (sweetheart, good girl, pretty, baby) notes : it's been a long road but i'm happy to introduce y'all to my baby! i've been (and still am) obsessed with juyeon since the zeneration 2 concert and i guess i've had a lot to write about him... i hope you'll find out the few references i've managed to sneak in! enjoy ✧.* shout out to my dear @winterchimez for proofreading and helping me during the whole writing process, you were a great help <3 words count : 13745
No one ever told you how relationships work. So when you fell in love with your best friend Juyeon at 16, you felt a little helpless. Should he be the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? Was it wrong to lean on him when he welcomed you into his arms for a movie night? Eventually those feelings faded as you both started dating, and you wondered if it was even true love. Maybe the 16-year-old teenager you were was just attracted to the idea of being close to another soul, mentally and physically.
Maybe yes.
The only thing you know right now at 24, is that the feelings you had for Juyeon back then were nothing compared to the ones you have for Sunwoo today. The attention and love he gives you makes everyone jealous. Even Juyeon himself.
If he wanted to take you out to dinner, you would turn him down because you already had plans with Sunwoo. Arcade, karaoke, late night walks, picnics, fancy restaurants or fast food, you’re always together. Sometimes when you feel like staying in, Juyeon would show up, hoping to watch a movie like the good old days. But he’s met with Sunwoo at the door and doesn’t have the energy to see you being all lovey-dovey.
He knows better than to be a third wheel. As much as he understands the time you spend with your boyfriend, he can’t help but feel jealous and left out. You’re not trying to make him feel that way, you just needed Sunwoo’s presence.
The two of you met in your 3rd year of thesis. He was actually the student under your supervision for his end-of-studies internship. You obviously spent six months seeing each other and working together – in the lab, the library, cafes and even at home. You both grew closer in no time, and that’s only fair given the fact that Sunwoo is a living comedian. You don’t think you would have made it through the whole editing process without his support.
The funniest thing he had ever done was that he was proofreading your work while you did the same for his. Sure enough, you both graduated with the help from one another and a couple of kisses were shared.
From Juyeon’s point of view, those six months felt like an eternity. He had a girlfriend at the time and couldn’t really go out with you. You were both busy for different reasons, but still tried to see each other once a week. But when you did see each other, you always talked about Sunwoo and he talked about his girlfriend. That’s what your lives were made of, but it was a little heartbreaking that you were best friends who only talked about your partners.
“How’s the job hunt going?” He asked at one of your meetings.
“Great actually, I felt like giving up, but I didn’t endure those three years to throw it all away, did I? Sunwoo helped me a lot, he’s my lifesaver.”
Juyeon felt like throwing up, as if his heart had been stepped on the moment he heard those words, and he didn’t know why.
“What about you?” You asked him, cutting his train of thought.
Oh, he knew you were talking about his own job, which he quit a few months ago (more like he’s on a break because he’s burned out). But it’s not like he has to tell you; he doesn’t have the guts to anyway. He thinks you would be sad and angry with him, when all you really want is for him to be happy. And he’s also upset that he’s had to give up on his dream job because it was affecting his health. Thankfully, his boss has been kind enough to give him a chance to rest up for now. Maybe all he needs to keep going is your reassurance?
“We broke up.” He says quietly, looking down at his hands.
“I’m so sorry Juyo, aren’t you too sad?” You say as you reach out to him.
“To be honest, I am.” He admits, looking up at you, a small smile forms on his lips. “It was a mutual agreement, but I feel like I screwed it up. She said I needed to think about my own needs and wants.”
“And what do you want?”
“To spend time with you.” He says straightforwardly.
Your cheeks flushed at his sudden comment. Has he always been so honest?
“I’m free tomorrow if you’re fine with that? Sunwoo is going out with his band.” You say, eager to spend more time with him. “Oh, and Juyo; you should know that I will always make time for you. You’re a big part of my life and I care about you more than anyone else so please do not hesitate to reach out if you need anything. I’m just one call away.”
“I know that but I always seem to bother you.” He says, a little ashamed to think so.
“You don’t. What makes you think that?” You frown at his words, wondering if he actually meant them. “You have no idea how much I look forward to our weekly meetings! It keeps me going during the week, I swear, ask Sunwoo he only hears about you.”
“Oh,” he responded, feeling delighted with your words.
“Yes Juyo, I miss you a lot.” You gasped shyly, suddenly very focused on your hot cup.
“I miss you even more.” He looks for your eyes with a hint of fondness that you don’t notice, even when you raise your head to tell him,
“So tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow,” he smiles, pleased to see you smile back with the same touch of affection.
When you think about it, you don’t understand how it is possible to break up with Lee Juyeon. You didn’t really know the girl he was dating, you never met her, you only saw her face in a picture once. But you do know your best friend, and he’s not the type to break someone’s heart. He would fight for the person he loves, even if it doesn’t work out. Juyeon is love personified. So how can you reject him?
Woo ☼ (3)
Sweetheart I miss you
When are you coming back home
I have a present for you
What kind of present?
Me ;)
OMW
Juyo <3 (1)
Thanks for today, I can’t wait for tomorrow. Pick you up at 10?
Will be pretty and ready!
Always pretty but ready? I’m looking forward to it
As soon as you read his message, your heart began to thump real loud and your cheeks immediately flushed red. Who are you and what have you done to Juyeon? When did he become so flirty? Or maybe he has always been like this and you never cared before. But why do you even care now? 
When you were 16, you remember vividly how he kissed your hand goodbye because he was a gentleman and you were a darling. Everyone at school made fun of you for being so old-fashioned, but little did they know that you liked it. Eventually, when you turned 17, he dropped the act and started kissing your forehead instead. It was a hundred per cent worse. Your cheeks turned pink every time you thought about it and people were calling you out for being highkey on PDA and asking you to spare the singles.
Maybe then he was always this flirty.
It didn’t matter much to you because it was puppy love. The first man you ever loved. Until Sunwoo came into the picture.
“How was your date sweetheart?” You laugh into the kiss he greets you with.
“Pretty good, I think I’m developing feelings, I don’t know, he’s just so sweet and- Ouch Sunwoo!” You yelped, surprised by his sudden, somewhat erotic gesture.
“What?” He giggles innocently.
“You didn’t have to pin me against the wall, did you?” You ask rhetorically, knowing full well what his answer will be.
“I did,” his sparkling eyes turn to onyx, his tongue runs over his lips and his gaze travels up and down your body as he answers.
“Yeah?” You whisper, aroused by his deep voice.
“Yes.”
His plump lips are all over yours in an instant, taking your breath away. To deepen the kiss and emphasise his need to be closer, he grabs your legs so you can wrap them around his waist and welcome him in. Your arms wrap around his neck as you yield, kissing him back with passion and love. He doesn’t let go until you’re both out of breath, and then he kisses you again and again like a madman. Eventually, you’re so lost in the pleasure of his kisses that when you feel him nipping at your neck, you push him away, panting.
“I understand that Juyeon is your best friend,” he says with a heavy voice. “But you can’t joke about dating another man.”
He doesn’t give you a chance to answer as he runs his tongue over your lips before kissing you lazily. You stick out your tongue, waiting for him to resume his kiss. He chuckles at your behaviour but kisses you nonetheless.
“Good girl hm, are you hungry?” He utters with lustful and honey dripping eyes.
“Let’s take this into the bedroom then.” At his promise to take you to heaven, you nod eagerly, excited to see what he has planned for you.
You don’t quite remember what happened after that, too lost in lust and love. You felt the kisses on your forehead and the caresses in your hair before he left the bed.
Suddenly, nothing. All you felt was emptiness.
You turn to check your phone when you yelp in pain because your back hurts. Your man was a beast last night.
Wait.
9:30am?
You hurriedly get out of bed, taking in your dishevelled appearance and the hickeys Sunwoo had the courtesy to leave on your body. You’re ashamed to go out like this, because you know that you have little to no time to cover them up.
More importantly, Juyeon will notice them. It’s not that you cared about exposing your sex life, you have a lot of fun with Sunwoo and he’s the greatest in and out of bed. But for Juyeon to see you in such a vulnerable way? It does something to you and you can’t figure out why.
You never talked about your sex life with Juyeon although you are best friends; you two are kind of secretive. Sure, there were times when you complained that your exes were terrible kissers or that dates were horrible. But when it comes to any form of intimacy, it was out of the books. You both never joked about kinks, never asked about turn-ons. Yet, you shared your very first kiss with Juyeon when you were 16.
It was a bit messy and hilarious because you had no idea what you were doing. You remember how when he dropped you off after school or after a playdate, he had this cute habit of kissing your hand goodbye. It was also at that age when you started going to parties – a party between friends, no alcohol, maybe just some cheap beer that tasted like grass. But that was fun and it was also the time when you were introduced to love, through couples and kisses.
Love has always been a foreign language to you. You know for a fact that love is what your parents share with each other, through physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, gifts but also through struggles.
But you also know that the person you’re closest to doing those things is Juyeon. You both were always cuddling, fighting over movies or places to eat. You both would also cheer, support and reassure each other.
You both would always have each other on your minds, sending texts, calling or buying sweet things. It’s only fair that you thought you were in love with him, isn’t it?
And that faithful night, at your birthday party, he thought it would be a great idea to carry you and run around in circles until he lost his balance and fell with you laying on top of him. You didn’t know what was going through his mind, but you saw flames in his starry eyes, and then he pecked at your lips. He brushed it off by pulling you up and wishing you a happy birthday but your heart was racing and so was his.
“Sorry Ju, I woke up late, I didn’t want to keep you waiting,” you pout as you reached his car, pressing a kiss on his cheek.
“Thank god your prettiness makes up for lost time,” he jokingly hugs you, his hands laying a little low on your waist. “But you have to take responsibility for making me wait.”
“Juyeon! It’s been 5 minutes you can’t blame me for the delay!” You wriggle into his embrace and put your head in the crook of his neck, a little embarrassed but wanting to be close to him.
“I can, and that’s exactly what I’m doing,” he whistles, taking you out of his arms to observe the love bites on your fair skin. “Maybe you’d be on time if you hadn’t had so much fun last night.”
“Y-Yeah, I walked into a trap,” you stammered, speechless.
“The kind of trap you can’t refuse, I bet.”
And he opens the passenger door before giving you his hand to help you get in. You look at his hand and then straight into his eyes to understand where that confidence comes from, but he just smiles and nods.
“Come on, we have much to do before the carriage turns into a pumpkin.” He smiles and fights with the wind to tuck a wild strand of hair behind your ear.
Spending time with Juyeon is one of the things you adore the most in the world. You were so used to spending your days with him when you were teenagers that you almost forgot what it was like. The princess treatment, the cafe dates, the shopping and giving opinions on outfits, the restaurants. Now that you’re all grown up, reliving those moments feels a little bit odd but great. After all, you’re the same people who dance to the music in every corner shop and laugh at every silly move you make.
Going out with Juyeon is also all about treats and gifts. You have this implicit rule that when you’re out and about, you’re encouraged to pay in turns – be it at the restaurants, bars or for desserts. And of course, he pleases you more often than you please him, but you tend to buy more things related to him – matching items or clothes that reflect his style.
“Look at this cute bracelet! We should get it to celebrate our 10 years offriendship,” you beamed, slipping the bracelet around his wrist without a word of protest to see how it looks.
“But it’s paired with a promise ring?” He comments, in case you haven’t noticed and had a change of heart.
“Then we can get the ring in another 10 years,” you giggle and squeeze his hand to reassure him that this is what you want.
Happy with your little joke, you went to the cashier to buy the bracelets. But it sparked something within Juyeon’s heart. He may be slow to understand, but you don’t have to tell him twice. You consider him to be your significant other. That’s what a promise ring means.
After all, you wanted to commit yourself to him for the rest of your life. You’re his best friend and that should be normal. It is normal to stick by each other’s side. But why is his heart missing a beat?
If you ask Juyeon about his relationship with you, he would describe it as “enchanting”. You’re the most important thing to him. Ever since he bumped into you in 3rd grade, you two have been inseparable. But there’s something that’s always bothered him.
In the beginning, he thought it was because you were the only one that he was really close to. He didn’t look at you any differently. But every time you smiled, he felt a twist in his stomach. Then he made it his goal to make you blush and to kiss your hand. It was thrilling to see you all flustered by his own actions.
He grew up and unfortunately that feeling never went away. In the end, he thought that maybe it was just the hormones. A 16-year-old boy needs to get to know his body and its needs. That’s what he did. Eventually the feelings vanished, but the uncomfortable feeling stayed. Even when he was with his ex.
He’s well aware that you are in a relationship with Sunwoo and that the two of you are in love. He’s never been happier for you. After all the people who have taken advantage of you, you deserve someone positive. Someone who will be there for you and will make you feel loved and truly fall in love. Like Sunwoo.
And yet, he doesn’t know why he’s so attracted to you. He needs to explore his feelings. At least to understand them. Even if it costs him.
“How about a drink?” He asks as the sun is about to go down.
“No, you need to drive safely.” You flinched, clearly against the idea of losing him in such a stupid way.
“What about my place? You know I have this amazing balcony overlooking the sea.” He offers in return with a smirk.
“Deal,” you say with gleaming eyes.
You love Juyeon’s apartment; it has a soft and romantic atmosphere and it’s even more beautiful when the sun goes down. The many plants he has turn a warm orange with the colours of the sky and you swear, it’s so beautiful, like a haven of peace.
“Red or white?” He asks, holding the two bottles out for you.
“Anything’s fine, choose for me please Juyo,” you sing-song, happy to share this moment with him.
While you are setting up his balcony table with candles and wine glasses, he returns with a red bottle and appetisers. He gestures for you to sit on the bean bag and pour the wine like a real chef. You whistle, impressed by his newfound skill. Furthermore, it wouldn’t be Juyeon if he didn’t do a little dance to make you laugh before handing you your glass.
Now that he’s seated, you allow yourself to take in your surroundings. It’s quiet, but you can hear the faint music coming from the living room speakers. Juyeon has never liked the silence, so he always needs to have some kind of background music to feel comfortable. He says it calms him down, especially when he’s nervous, and you have to agree with that.
But does that mean that he was nervous right now?
He never needed music with you, as he always said your voice was his own melody – the harmony he couldn’t get enough of. 
“Thank you,” he whispers, pulling you out of your reverie.
You nod, knowing exactly what he means, and reach out to take his hand. He intertwines your fingers and, in the pink-orange hues of the sky you catch yourself blushing. You risk a glance to see him starring absent-mindedly into space and you seize the opportunity to stare him down.
His bangs, usually on his forehead are pushed back, giving him a more mature and sexy look. His eyes, in a beautiful crescent shape, shine with the intensity of the stars. His pretty nose sits up on his face, like a trophy ready to be claimed. And his lips. They’re curled into a gentle smile.
Without a care in the world, he runs his tongue over them and opens them as if he wanted to speak. But no sound comes out, except for the tongue he’s now biting. Suddenly, as if he was aware that you are looking at him, he turns to meet your gaze. Truth be told, you weren’t very discreet. His dark eyes hold yours, then move to your lips, and you see the faint beginnings of a smirk on his lips before he bursts into laughter. 
“Like what you see?” He points out, all smug.
That fucker.
You slapped him playfully before you realised you were biting your lips. Yet, he still looks at you as if you were the one who hung the stars in the sky and shone in their place.
All of a sudden, his eyes turn mischievous and you find yourself in his arms as he leads you into the living room. He turns up the music, grabs the camera, puts on a pair of framed glasses and starts dancing. You joined him, because there is no world in which you wouldn’t follow Juyeon. You dance like you’re in a club, grab the wine bottle and shout the lyrics at the top of your lungs. Juyeon films you through the mirror and you play along, you’re the model, he’s the artist. Until he puts the camera in a corner to film the both of you and starts to dance an old choreo that you both did. You smile broadly and the night goes by like this. In between drinking and dancing.
At some point, you find yourselves taking a stroll, jumping and dancing around poles. Oh, but you’re not drunk! Juyeon took out his camera and kept filming you, laughing. The man was hyping you up, the street was your runway! And even though it was a little embarrassing, you had a lot of fun. Trust Juyeon to make you feel the best!
Around midnight, you were eating ice cream in the nearest park when your phone screen lit up with a call.
Woo ☼.
Oh, no. You forgot to inform him you were going out with yesterday’s activities.
“Babyyyyy,” he whines, sounding tired, “where you aaaat.”
“At Juyeon’s, we-“ You’re cut off as Juyeon steals your phone, brushing against your hands a little too long.
“Sorry,” he hiccups, “is it all right if we keep each other company for the night? I can’t drive right now.” Juyeon tries to apologise but is cut short by Sunwoo.
“Had a fun night I see?”
You can feel his anger rising from the way his voice drops an octave. Sunwoo has always been jealous of Juyeon. When you got together, he was very insecure at first, knowing that you had a male best friend and seeing you spend so much time with him. It took some time, but the trust you’ve built up has overcome that awful feeling.
You still have to reassure him sometimes, and that’s okay because Juyeon is your best friend and Sunwoo is your boyfriend. You love them both in different ways. You talked about it with Juyeon and later he got jealous because you spent all your time with Sunwoo on your trip to comfort him. It wasn’t easy, but they learnt to trust you. Along the way, you may have convinced yourself that everything would be fine.
“Sunny, baby, I’m sorry I didn’t inform you. I will sleep at Juyeon’s and be back first thing in the morning before you wake up,” you say in a soft voice, trying to soothe him.
“I’m sorry too,” he voices out, letting out a breath lost in his own emotions, “I panicked when I didn’t see you at home. But I’m glad you’re all right.”
“I know,” you sighed, glancing at Juyeon, “I’m in good hands, I promise.”
“Hurry back, I miss my goodnight kiss already.” He replies, seemingly content with the current arrangement.
“Will be there in no time,” you giggled.
“I love you,” he answers, a smile blooming in his voice.
“I love you too.”
He hangs up just as he called, smiley, which makes you beam in return. However, when you turn to face Juyeon he’s anything but smiling. In his frowning eyes you decipher a sombre mood. Something in complete contrast to the joy you shared tonight. You reach out to grab his hand, but he pulls it back before you can do so.
“We should head back, it’s getting late.” He says firmly.
Your heart breaks at his words. Without giving him a chance, you cupped his face, forcing him to look at you. The hurt look in his eyes makes your heart swell. You scan him to see if he wants to answer, but he avoids you. You’re so close and yet so far away. You feel like throwing up, because your best friend never acted like this around you. He never once avoided you nor stopped talking to you. Thus, you did the only thing you can think of.
You hugged him, as tightly as you can.
You feel his heart pounding and wonder if it’s from the unknown emotions he’s carrying or from your physical touch. You put your hand on his broad chest to feel his heartbeat and plant a kiss on it to reassure him. It stirs something in Juyeon and he hugs you back so tightly you think you’ll lose your breath. He holds you in his arms for what seems like an eternity, your head nestled in the crook of his neck. But you don’t complain, you felt safe.
You stay there, in the warm embrace that contrasts with the cool of the night, squeezing him a little tighter when you hear passers-by whistling lovingly at you. When he lets go, you can see the faint pink colour that tints his cheeks, brought out by the street lights. But little did you know that you have the same colours on your face, if not stronger?
“You okay?” You ask as you rub small circles on his back.
“Yes I am,” he lies openly in a husky voice, “I’m okay.”
Juyeon is fucked. Completely screwed. He’s absolutely, unquestionably and sincerely in love with you.
He has been for quite some time, now that he thinks about it. But he never admitted it. That damned twist in his gut that never left his mind, he knows where it comes from now.
In order to cope with his newfound feelings he lets you use the bathroom first while he changes the sheets and tidies up the living room. He’s floating, not sure if he will ever get a wink of sleep. Especially if you both sleep in the same bed. Because to you, he’s just your best friend, the one you’ve slept with countless times. No strings attached.
He can’t imagine you in his arms, nor can he look forward to waking up by your side. You’re not his.
“Juyo?” Your tired voice echoes from the corridor. “C-Can I get some clothes?”
Oh. That doesn’t mean anything. You have always shared clothes. Then why was he so excited to see you in them? Right, because he’s madly in love with you and knows you will look ravishing in his big shirt. Also because sharing clothes is such an intimate thing couples do. If he lends you his current pyjamas because they have his scent on them, you couldn’t blame him. He’s just a man.
“Are you coming?” You inquire, walking towards him.
It’s worse than anything he’d ever imagined. The shirt is definitely too big for you going down one shoulder, showing the beginning of your chest and reaching halfway up your thighs. What’s more, your pretty thighs are covered by the shorts that rises up when you sit next to him. He looks away, embarrassed to be staring at you.
“I will sleep on the couch, don’t worry about me.”
“No way,” you retorted with little energy left, “your bed is big enough for both of us.”
He’s been acting strange today. First he was feeling all overconfident, then flirtatious, followed by anger, and now shyness and embarrassment. You take a piece of the blanket lying on his lap and you stretch your legs out on the sofa, letting your head fall on his shoulder. Sleep can wait, Juyeon can’t.
“Are you sure you’re okay? Don’t lie to me.” You ask, breathing softly into his ear.
“No,” he shudders, with a faraway look in his eyes, “I’m not okay and I don’t know how to get through this.”
“What’s wrong Juyo? Do you want to talk about it?” You pause to gauge his reaction. “Is it about your ex?”
“More or less,” he breathes out. “The breakup wasn’t that bad, like I said, it was a mutual decision. It’s just- when you started dating Sunwoo I was so happy for you, happy that you found someone who was worthy of your love and loved you the right way. And I thought I would be happy if I found that special someone, I longed for it. But I ended up in different relationships throughout the year, never lasting more than two months. And that’s ok, maybe they weren’t the right person for me, maybe it wasn’t the right time, maybe this, maybe that. I really thought I was going to be happy and I ended up getting my heart broken every time. As much as I believe now that I don’t deserve to be loved. I think I went into my last relationship in that state of mind, and I think she felt it too. Hard not to, is it? We had long talks and great times together; I think I really liked her. And I know she liked me back, I’m just not ready to be in an exclusive relationship right now.”
And everything he said is true, he’s more than happy for you and he thought he would be happy. But he can’t be happy in a relationship that isn’t with you.
“There’s also something I’ve never told you,” he continues, sniggering at the absurdity of his reasoning. “Something I should have told you a long time ago, it doesn’t make me proud, and it sort of reflects why my love life was so messed up. I can’t say it’s the only reason, but it played a big part in my mental health.”
You want to cry so badly, he has endured it all alone and it must have weighed heavily on him. At this point, you’re just waiting to speak and respond but every word that comes out of his beautiful mouth leaves you speechless. You’re such a bad friend that you’ve never noticed the way his eyes get dark and gloomy, or how he cancels your plans at the last minute because he’s got something else planned. When in fact it was sadness overload. Sure everyone has their own coping mechanisms, you wish you could have been there for him, but here you were Juyeon letting you in and you’re here to stay.
“It’s been two months since I was diagnosed with burnout and stopped working. It started off as something mild when I came home more exhausted than usual. I thought I wasn’t getting enough sleep but then I started to feel mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. It was hard to concentrate on my daily tasks and you know how much I love my job? I felt like I was going to die because I couldn’t even have fun doing what I love. Going out with you, my friends or my ex felt great, but I wasn’t as invested as I used to be.” He pauses to catch his breath and swallow back the tears.
“Don’t get me wrong, today was absolutely perfect and I was hyped, I still am. Today felt like going back to when we were sixteen and I loved it. I’m actually starting to feel better. The break up helped a lot because it was taking a toll on my mental health. I know I said I liked her and I did, but I couldn’t help but feel unwanted. Even when she was riding me,” he chuckles, trying to lighten the mood.
“And it hurts that I didn’t have the guts to talk to you about it because I was afraid of how you would react. Like, hello, I’m taking a break from work because I feel like shit? And I would really like to get your approval so that I can move on. Because you mean everything to me,” he ends shyly.
“Juyeon,” you say in a soft and caring voice, “you mean the world to me too.”
You continued. “You mean the whole world to me and I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me the most. I could come up with something, but it wouldn’t make up for what you’ve been through. You are strong, stronger than anyone. It’s so hard to keep your head above water that I’m proud of you for speaking up and even stopping work. Because focusing on your health is the most important thing. Situation and money may go but I will always stay. I’m so proud of you, proud of who you are and who you’re becoming. You’ll never stop growing and I’ll be there every step of the way, watching you blossom and be happy.”
“And I know you feel like you’ll never be happy,” you resumed, holding his hand. “The only thing I can say is, as hard as it seems, everything you live makes you stronger. Even more beautiful. There’s someone in this world waiting patiently for you, to love you properly, to make you feel loved and wanted. You’re an exceptional person, Juyeon. By that I mean you go above and beyond the call of duty, you give your total support and care, you show up when something’s wrong and I bet you’re an even more protective lover. We did everything together, cried, laughed, smiled, loved. My youth was filled with you and I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t happy because you were and are always by my side.”
“Today was the best time I’ve had in weeks, and that’s because I am with you. We danced, a lot. And you know how dancing has always been our escape,” you paused as you saw the first hint of a smile creep across his face as you continued. “I saw your smile, it was genuine and you were so beautiful. It may have been hard, you’ve been hard on yourself, but today the man I saw was happy. I’m happy because you’re happy, and I’m sad when you’re sad. We are one Juyeon, and I want you to know that I’m here for you, always.”
Long before you have finished speaking, he has taken you in his arms. His embrace is not heavy, but you can feel the weight on his shoulders lighten. You have so many feelings for him, they all blend together and you don’t seem to feel the butterflies in your stomach or the fire he has lit in your heart.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he confesses.
“And what would I be without you?”
Your head rests on his chest and he’s suddenly afraid you can hear his heart beating. You’re so beautiful, your tired eyes fighting sleep and your lashes fluttering. His shirt slipped off your shoulder as he held you in his arms and the permanent smile on your face makes him completely weak. He could kiss you right now. If only you were single.
“Let’s go to sleep, hm?” He caresses your face, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Together?” You cracked yet another smile.
“Together,” he grins from ear to ear.
Your arms find their way around his neck and you bend your head to make an implicit request. His hands go around your waist and below your knees before he stands up and carries you bridal style. You both laugh at the absurdity of the situation, but also blushed at the romantic gesture. He sets you down on (what his brain calls) your side of the bed and plants a kiss on your forehead.
He then goes through his nightly routine before coming back to you, wrapped in the covers, fast asleep. His heart is about to explode. Now that he is aware of his feelings, he is overwhelmed by the love he has been repressing. He slides in next to you and holds back from embracing you. And if you happen to get close and make your way into his arms, he’ll be delighted to hold you tight.
“Sleep well Starlight, I love you,” he mumbles, kissing your hair.
“I love you more Juyo.”
Waking up the next morning wasn’t as awkward as Juyeon might have thought after the pseudo-confession you heard. He woke up first when he felt you shift in his arms. Because yes, you ended up in his arms, face against his torso. He tried not to make a big deal out of it, calming his breathing and enjoying the warmth of your body. Absentmindedly, his hand caresses your tangled hair, smoothing it and slowly waking you from your slumber.
“Good morning Starlight,” he says, honey dripping from his hoarse voice. “Slept well?”
“Like a baby, you?” You yawned, looking up from his chest.
“Even better than a baby.” He doesn’t want to let you go, once you’re out of his bedroom he’ll have to go back to his little miserable life without your starlight to light it up.
“Shall we take you home? Your boyfriend might get impatient,” he laughs, remembering the events of the previous night.
“Well, he’ll have to wait until I’m full from breakfast! I know someone who makes pancakes to die for,” you winked as you get out of his clothes and disappear into the bathroom.
You know you said you’d be back before he wakes up, and you want to. You miss him. But being in Juyeon’s arms, feeling the regular beat of his heart, makes you feel at home. You don’t want to end what you both have now.
You eat breakfast in relatively silence, except when Juyeon tries to flip the pancakes in the frying pan only to have one stick to the wall. And you watch him adoringly from where you sit, trying to make up for his silliness.
In the end, you leave his apartment in no time at all, dreading your return to your own home. Even though you know that Sunwoo is patiently waiting for you. The last two days you spent with Juyeon were out of time, it was an enchanted interlude and the return to real life suddenly seems very difficult.
He drops you off in front of the building, not without kissing you on the cheek and saying goodbye for the last time. You try not to think of it as a date night as you head for the front door but he’s quick to say “We’re not done yet, you’ll see me more often now” he chimed as he watches you smile and gets in.
The smile doesn’t leave your face until you turn the key in the lock and come face to face with Sunwoo, smiling from head to toe. He takes you in his arms and spins you around before planting kisses all over your face.
“Sunny,” you giggled, “please.”
“But I missed you,” you press a kiss to his lips as he answers, and you feel him smile through it.
“I’m sorry I overreacted, you know I get scared easily, but I shouldn’t take it out on you when you haven’t done anything,” he apologised, bowing his head.
“No, it’s my fault too,” you shake your head. “We had a crazy night and when I woke up you were gone. I was also late and didn’t want to keep him waiting.”
“You know that I’m jealous of Juyeon, right? He might be your best friend, but he might see you as more than that. You can’t say you didn’t want him to wait, because what, you’re willing to make me wait like yesterday but not him? It’s unfair, because you always end up prioritising him.” He bellows, frustrated.
“Sunwoo please,” you begged. “Sunwoo, listen to me, please.” He takes a step back, feeling his anger rising.
“To say what? That you needed to be with him? That he needs you? Bullshit, look me in the eye and tell me he doesn’t have feelings for you!” He shouts in a pissed off rage.
He goes back into the living room and you follow him to see him pacing back and forth. You can tell he’s furious. He always gets angry when you mention Juyeon and it pisses you off. You can’t even spend a day with your best friend because he gets jealous? You’ve been together long enough to think he’s finally understood that he’s the one you love. But as displeased as you are, you’ll never stop telling him and reminding him that you love him. Because couples fight, because he’s insecure and because you care.
“You might as well develop feelings for him!” He spits vociferously.
“He broke up with his girlfriend and lost his job,” you drop, tired of this pointless battle. “So yes, he needed me. And yes, I needed to be with him. I feel like an absolutely shitty friend because I’ve been sitting in his company for weeks and I didn’t even notice that his heart was being broken to pieces. You can shout at me as much as you want Sunwoo, but you’re the one I love. Juyeon may need me again in the future and I’ll be there for him, but at the end of the day I love you and only you.”
“You’re lying. T-There’s no way he…“ He tries to take your hand but you step back, annoyed.
“Have I ever lie to you, Sunwoo?”
The sheepish and upset look on his face is enough to tell you that he’s blaming himself. So you lead him over to the sofa and tell him everything, from the break-up to his exhaustion, which means burnout, but leave out the private details. It’s a lot to take in, and you wonder if he’ll ever believe you. Why would you lie about something so important?
You love Sunwoo, you really do. But you can’t help but be a little irritated by his behaviour. You feel terrible for even thinking and feeling this way, but Juyeon is your best friend! What was wrong with that? What doesn’t he understand about the word “best friend”? You sighed as you take him in your arms and stroke his back, both to calm him down and to ease your own mind. You hold each other for a while, for as long as your hearts desire, but your minds wander to Juyeon. You miss him and you wonder what he’s up to, when you’ll see each other again. Another sigh escapes your lips and Sunwoo looks at you questioningly.
“Movie?” You ask, trying to divert your attention from Juyeon.
“It’s 11,” he chuckles, finally at peace.
“Yeah, so? We can order pizzas and spend the day at home?” You kiss his hand with doe eyes.
“Sounds like a fabulous idea,” he quickly grabs his phone to place an order, “same as usual?”
“I’m feeling adventurous today, so pick whatever you like!”
You hear your own phone buzzing as he focuses on the app again. And obviously it’s the boy of all the arguments, the one who’s been on your mind since you got home and who seems to be distracting you a lot.
Juyo <3 (1)
I miss ya, whatcha doing?
Thinking about u
That ain’t possible
Whyyyy
Because I’m thinking about you
“Who are you talking to with that smiley face?” Sunwoo asks, tilting his head.
“Changmin, he’s talking about the person he met and he seems so in love.”
It's a half-hearted lie, because Changmin told you about the person he recently met, but also because if you say Juyeon's name right now, civil war will break out.
Juyo <3
Oh yeah, prove it?
Seconds later, your phone rings with an incoming call from Juyeon.
Juyo <3
JUYEON YOU CAN’T DO THIS
YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME
Aw pretty’s scared by a sudden phone call?
Actually…
You take a second to answer, pondering if it’s a good idea to tell him about your couple’s conflict. Especially when he’s the one causing it.
Juyo <3 (1)
Am I disturbing you?
You always turn my world upside down
Same goes for you Starlight ;)
So?
I had a fight with Sunwoo
Nothing bad, we already made up
But it’s becoming a recurring thing, and I hate it
Have you talked about it?
That it’s getting hard for you?
Yes and no
We always talk about it, set limits and make up but weeks later it’s as if the conversation never happened
As much as I love him I’m tired Ju
No, you don’t have the right to say you’re tired, because that would mean you’re ready to give up on your relationship for a few fights?
I’m afraid that’s not a valid reason
And I know you’re not the type to give up on someone you love
So take matters into your own hands, spend the day with him and make out ffs
Yeah, haha, you’re right
We’ll eat pizzas and watch a film, that’ll definitely help
And I’ll see if he’s nice enough to make out with him
I can be good for you instead ;)
Yah! You’re losing points Lee Juyeon!
I’m only aiming for the 10s sorry!
Right in the bull’s eye
Which is my heart yes
GTG JUYO
TTYL I LOVE YOU
<3
And I love you more <3
You saw his message through the notification, which you cowardly rejected, but that didn’t stop you from smiling. The conversation had to end quickly, as you were venturing into uncharted territory that doesn't leave you impassive. Besides, Sunwoo was getting suspicious of your big smile.
And he’s right, because what the hell was that? You’re such a coward whose heart beats a hundred miles an hour. He’s definitely winning points, but you’ll never admit it, and to what end? Your heart doesn’t know yet.
On the contrary, Juyeon’s heart beats wildly at your bravery. He doesn’t want to flirt despite his growing feelings, but you leave the door open too wide for him not to come in.
You’re still his best friend, so if you ever need advice or a listening ear, he’ll be there. Like that horrible joke about making out, he hated it. But he knew that it would make you laugh and feel better, because he knows you better than anyone else.
So why can’t he read your feelings? You're not usually so cryptic for no reason, he's sure of that. Yet the changes in your heart can be seen gradually: your sweet words, as well as the ambiguous ones, all carry a special and deep meaning. You’re a book Juyeon is dying to read, but you’re not descriptive enough for him to decipher just yet.
Sunwoo used to read you easily, but he’s not sure of anything anymore. He knows that you love him, that your love language consists of words of affirmation and that you never stop reminding him of it. And yet his insecurities always get the best of him and you end up fighting. The truth is, he’s afraid. You’ve always spent a lot of time with Juyeon and that’s fair, you’ve known each other for almost ten years. But shouldn’t you make up for that time with your one-year boyfriend?
He knows he can’t restrict you or your outings, that would be a dick move and he’s not a dick. You have lots of boy friends and he’s okay with that, but Juyeon? Juyeon annoys him. He seems too perfect to be true:  his looks, his gentle and romantic nature. He’s in a one-sided competition because Juyeon couldn’t care less. Or so he thought until now.
Halfway through the film, you're cuddled up in his arms, laughing, when his phone vibrates. Why on earth is Juyeon texting him?
Juyeon (1)
I just wanted to apologise for yesterday. This is not a valid reason, but I wanted to keep my best friend to myself for a while. I’m sorry if that hurt you.
Apology accepted. We’re adults and you’re defo not the one to blame but I appreciate it.
Thanks man
It cost Juyeon a lot to send that message. But in his place, he would have been furious if the situation had happened to him. So he toned it down, to ease the tension and make you feel better. But he’d do it again any time; anything to spend time with you.
And that’s exactly what happened in the weeks that followed.
You spent the whole week with Sunwoo after your meeting with Juyeon, going with him to his band rehearsals, shopping for clothes, accessories or window shopping, going on dates to the cinema, the park and restaurants. You did everything with him.
But that didn’t stop you from texting Juyeon every day. Sometimes he was the one who initiated the conversation, and other times you had to spam him to ask his opinion on the latest clothes you bought or because you missed him. Your weekly outings have also become two or three times a week, and you often meet up on his balcony for a night of dancing and drinks.
Everything is done with respect for your relationship, but you feel his hands on you longer than necessary, always within limits and sometimes in places that make you blush. For an example, he would place them on your hips, and you would be a fool to say that his little touches did not make your heart flutter. When he opens the door for you, when he orders for you without asking and never makes a mistake, or even when he gives you presents that you’ve looked at with envy. He’s so observant and attentive that causes butterflies in your stomach. The more time you spend with him, the more you can’t deny the attraction you feel.
He makes you feel like you are 16 again.
He kisses your forehead, cheek or hand when he drops you off. He holds your hand so you don’t get lost in the crowd. Even if it’s just an excuse, you let him because deep down you want him to.
And you hated yourself for it. You feel so guilty about Sunwoo. Yes, Juyeon may be a little more enterprising than usual, but he hasn’t changed his ways. You’re the one who reacts to harmless words and lazy touches. But your heart hasn’t changed. You love Sunwoo. Those feelings for Juyeon aren’t real. It is an attraction that arises because you spend all your time together, because he’s handsome and cares for you.
You’re not… in love with him.
Isn’t that right?
“Sweetheart, I bought fried chicken on the way home!” Sunwoo says one day after his rehearsal.
“Oh Sunny, you don’t know how much I’ve been craving it,” you clap, looking forward to devouring it. “Thank you.”
“Can I get a hug for being the most awesome boyfriend ever?” He asks sweetly.
“Oh you do,” you giggle, jumping into his arms.
“I love you,” he kisses your nose.
“Me too,” you reply, tiptoeing to kiss his forehead.
“Sunnyyyy,” you call out his name on a Friday afternoon. “Can I go out for the night with Kev, Minnie, Chani and Ju?”
“Sure! Don’t come back too late hm? And be careful.”
“Yes! I’ve got the four horsemen of the apocalypse to look after me and myself!” You laughed.
“Have fun Sweetheart, I love you,” he whispers, kissing your forehead.
“Me toooo Sunny,” you smiled.
And yet, as he does his best to be there for you, to shower you with love and care, you notice that your interactions are gradually diminishing. He’s not the problem but you are. Just like yesterday, you’ve been exchanging messages and at the end of all your conversations you have this cute habit of saying I love you. Except this time, you haven’t replied. You liked his message and replied with a heart.
But that’s not the only case, because you catch yourself not saying “I love you” back when you talk to him. Yet you’re still physically and intimately close. It’s as if you’re giving yourself to him in order to compensate for the emotional changes that you’re going through. And then what? You won’t even be able to kiss him? Hold his hand? Be intimate? You felt terrible, and this has been going on for months.
Perhaps the best (or worst) thing to do is to talk to him about it.
“Sunny? Can we talk?” You say out of the blue one morning.
“Yes baby, tell me?” He replies as he comes out of the bathroom, shirtless.
“Get dressed first,” you giggle.
“Why, don’t you like what you see?” He pouts, crossing his arms to emphasise his torso and you look away, ashamed to be turned on when you’re about to break his heart.
“Oh I do, but you’re distracting me from the point!”
“Sorry, sorry,” he laughs as he pulls on a t-shirt, “is it better now?”
“Yes, thank you,” you sigh.
“Are you okay?” He asks suddenly, sensing your discomfort. “You know you can tell me anything, I’m here for you.”
“Sunwoo, I-“ you take his hand in yours for support. “You need to know that I love you, it has never changed and it will never change, the feelings I have for you are very much real and I cherish them as much as I cherish you.”
“You’re not breaking up, are you? Because I won’t let you.” His eyes are shining now and you want to go back in time. You want to erase everything that has happened in the last two and a half months, the growing romantic feelings and the hurt.
“Sunwoo, I’m not breaking up with you, you’re the person I care about the most in the world, I would never let you down. And I hate myself for what I’m about to say.” You take a deep breath and as you do you know he’s figured it out and tears start to roll down his sweet face.
“I- fell in love with Juyeon,” you drop your head in shame.
You don't have the courage to look up and see the disappointment on his face, but you force yourself to. And when you finally did, his reaction catches you by surprise. It was obviously pain and sorrow, but also resilience?
“May I ask, how?” His voice is low, almost a murmur, but his eyes search yours for the truth.
“I- don’t know, it just happened.”
“Come on, you don’t just fall in love with another man by accident,” he laughs sarcastically.
“And yet I did!” You raise your voice in annoyance. “I didn’t choose it Sunwoo. And I would go back in time if I could!”
He takes a minute to consider your words, to decide whether or not you’re telling the truth. You didn’t expect this conversation to be easy, but he doesn’t make it any easier for you. You expected him to be in denial, to yell at you and cry. Instead he went straight towards the acceptance stage and he had this heartless look on his face. You knew you deserved it because he’s right; you don’t fall in love with another man by chance.
“Does he know? That you-“ he struggles to find the words, but you let him, because it has been hard for you too. You’re in love with your best friend, and you’ve probably been in love with him since you were 16. “That you love him?”
“No, oh god no!” You panic, finally thinking of the consequences, “I wanted to tell you first because I love you and I owe you the truth.”
“But you intend to tell him?” He worries and suddenly you feel like you’re talking to your best friend, the same conversation you had before you started dating Sunwoo.
“No Sunwoo, it was never a question of telling him or not. Yes, I love Juyeon romantically, but you’re my boyfriend. And I’m not trying to fool myself by saying that I still love you, I love you. And I love Juyeon too, but I’m not going to do anything with it.”
“You’re silly,” he chuckles affectionately. “Within the two months since our fight, I’ve watched you for a long time baby. I observed your body movements, your facial expressions and your words, hoping that it was all temporary and that we’d come out of it stronger together. But all I saw was love, but towards someone else. You came home giddy, eyes full of stars. Sometimes even in a frenzy of exaltation from which I found it hard to pull you out, because knowing that you were happy made me happy. So I won’t say that I knew it, but I sensed it. And I know that you love me, I have never doubted it and I don’t doubt it now. But you love him silly. Perhaps even more than you love me. I’m not mad at you, I saw you falling for him, I just ignored the signs. And I know you didn’t choose it, nor did you want to break my heart. Your love for him is stronger and I can hear it. Thank you for telling me, it must have cost you a lot.”
You start to cry, because what else can you do but cry? You love him and it hurts you to hear him say that you love someone stronger. But he’s right. No matter how much you try to deny it, you love Juyeon unconditionally.
“Why,” you cry out.
“Why what baby,” he takes you in his arms, guiding your head in the crook of his neck and your tears start to soak his t-shirt.
“I’m pretty sure I broke your heart and stomped on it, so why aren’t you mad at me? Why are you taking it so well? I don’t understand. I feel like shit and you’re too perfect?”
“You have no idea of the pain, anger and emptiness I feel right now, I’m far from perfect,” his voice falters as he tries to hold back his tears, “but I can’t take it out on you, even though you deserve it, because you didn’t want it? Also because I didn’t speak when I realised you were drifting away. I know you blame yourself, and yes, I am heartbroken, I can’t wait to cry but I don’t want to make you sadder than you already are.”
“I don’t deserve you Sunny, I’m sorry, I love you to the moon and back,” you smile shyly.
“And I love you just as much, thank you for the love that doesn’t make me feel lonely,” he smiles back as he rubs your back in slow motions. “Can I kiss you? One last time?”
“Thought you’d never ask.”
When his lips touch yours, it has never felt better. The kiss is a little salty because you have both been crying, but also sweet. It is your last kiss and you devour each other’s lips as if it were the first, not wanting to part. You quickly run out of air, but he presses his lips to yours to convey his feelings one last time and you smile, knowingly, as you kiss him back.
“You should go to him,” he says, lips swollen and eyes puffy.
“Yes, to be with my best friend. And you should call Eric for the same reason,” you sobbed, and he giggles.
“Coward,” he laughs, “but I will.”
“And Sunwoo,” you start again. “I would never do anything without your approval.”
“Thank you,” he replies, touched and aware of the feelings you will always have for him. “For everything, but especially for being with me.”
“I should be the one thanking you, my lifesaver,” you kissed his cheek as you take his hand in yours. “Let’s remain good friends, in the future.”
“Absolutely, if I ever get over you,” he laughs in a reassuring way.
You know that the joke is just his way of breaking the tension, so you laugh it off, saying that he should, and you imitated a knife at your throat as a warning, which makes him laugh heartily. Then, your heart sinks at the sound of you no longer being the recipient. Yes you fell in love with someone else, and it will be just as hard to get over him. But you have Juyeon, and he’s your rock.
Juyo <3
Juyo can I come over?
Sure, is something wrong?
These three words are enough to turn your heart upside down. He’s always been thoughtful, and now that you’ve accepted your feelings, you feel butterflies swirling in your tummy.
Juyo <3
Sunwoo and I broke up
I’ll pick you up in 5
Yes pls, drive safely
He pulls up in the parking lot exactly 5 minutes after his message, just like he said. You rush down the stairs, too eager to melt into his arms to wait for the lift. He doesn’t have time to get out of the car before you throw yourself on him, crying. Tears of separation and heartbreak, and tears of joy when you see him again because you know you love him.
“I’m here,” he whispers in a panicked voice, probably not expecting you so soon and in such a state. “I’m right here, let it out.”
And you do, the feelings you’ve been burying for 2 months are just waiting to be expressed. You cry until your body aches from lack of air and your eyes are dry. Finally, you shiver and regret having gone out so quickly without covering up. But Juyeon is just as quick to pull the jacket he was wearing over your shoulders and you hum happily as his scent washes over you.
“Let’s go home?” He caresses your hair tenderly.
You’re amazed that he doesn’t ask any questions, he just stands by you and supports you through this difficult ordeal that he knows only too well. And the truth is, he’s even sad for you. No matter how much he loves you, you’re the definition of love to him. For you to break up with Sunwoo, for whatever reason, doesn’t make any sense. It’s not his place to ask if you don’t tell him first, so he just holds your hand on the way back, and when he has to let go to change gear, he makes sure he puts it back on your thigh.
This makes you blush like a tomato, how dare he put his big hand on your thigh, almost completely covering it whole. You’re pretty sure your feelings are written all over your face, but he mistakes your blushing for embarrassment, when in fact it’s just romantic stimulation. You look up to see if his hand placement has any effect on him, only to find that he is blushing as well. Being as dense as he is, you mistook his shyness for embarrassment.
You two definitely make quite the pair.
“Make yourself at home Starlight,” he says as he opens the front door, never stopping to hold your hand.
You step inside as he tells you to and try to take off your shoes, planning to curl up on the sofa under the blanket while you wait for him and his hugs. But he had other ideas as he grabs your wrist to pull you closer, pinning you between him and the newly closed front door. Your surprise translates into a gasp that becomes a choke as he drops to one knee. Your heart pounds in your chest at the way he looks at you, worshipping you. Without warning, he bends down to untie your shoelaces, still smiling and even a little mischievous.
“What?” He smiles proudly. “Can’t I look after my Starlight?”
You open your mouth to speak but no sound comes out, too surprised by his playful tone.
“Cat got your tongue?” He sticks out his tongue as he stands up.
“Yes, you got it!” You slap him gently as a reward for nervousness.
“Not in my mouth though…” He whispers so quietly you almost don’t hear it, and that earns him another slap, only he steps back to avoid your blow and you stumble and fall on top of him.
“I guess it will be easier to carry you now,” he chuckles, kissing your forehead.
He puts his arms under your knees and around your waist and you squeal as he lifts you up, bridal style. This man will be the death of you. Oh, how you would kiss him if you weren’t so heartbroken and hadn’t just broken up. And he would kiss you just as much. You’re both madly in love and it shows.
He wraps you in a blanket as he lays you down on the sofa before kissing your forehead for the umpteenth time. Then he goes into the kitchen and fetches your favourite foods, drinks and desserts, which he sets out on the coffee table. You were surprised by the homemade dishes, as if he’d made them with a special purpose in mind. But he doesn’t say a word or make a comment, he just slips under your blanket when he’s done and hugs you, breathing in your scent.
You stay in each other’s arms for a while, not saying a word, just enjoying your hearts beating in unison. It feels heavenly, relaxing and you can almost feel yourself coming back to life. If Sunwoo was your lifesaver, Juyeon is your guardian angel. He is always looking out for you and giving you his utmost special care, just like right now, for no particular reason (even if there is one now).
He doesn’t pry, he just waits for you to speak while he grabs the remote to put on the latest show you’ve started together and feeds you. You’re quite grateful for the little comments he makes during the show, distracting you from the truth: the burning love you have for him that consumes you. In the end, you tell him that you still love Sunwoo, but that your recent incessant arguments have taken their toll on you.
That, against all odds, you’ve spilt up properly. And that it will be a while before you move on, but that the door is not closed. You made sure to emphasise this part, because what if there’s a small chance that Sunwoo was right and Juyeon is a fool in love with you? You’re not ready yet, but when the time comes, you want to confess your love to him and live out the childhood romance you’ve always dreamed of, until death do you part.
The next few of weeks passed in a blur, and you have basically settled into Juyeon’s apartment – going back and forth to your house to pick up your things and put them in his closets. Your shoes sits nicely in the new shoe rack he bought for you to go out together, and your toothbrush sits proudly next to Juyeon’s. You even have matching ones. Oh, and Juyeon can finally happily say that you’ve got your side of the bed, with your cute belongings on the bedside table and a picture of the two of you at 16 in a frame.
In fact, you slowly become a domestic couple-like going grocery shopping together and going on so-called dates. Life with Juyeon is easy. Whether you go out at dawn or dusk, he’s always with you, matching your pace and holding your hand from the streetlights to the dancing starlight. When you saw your hands touching and your steps overlapping, it reminds you of your first encounter and the fluttering of your heart. How you shyly looked at him, only to see him already looking at you lovingly, red on his cheeks. That cold winter you spent together was actually the warmest moment of Juyeon’s life, and that day might have been the day you hid a present for each other in your sleeve.
Even more slowly, your relationship with Juyeon develops as the months go by. It was hard not for it to blossom, considering the fact that you live together and that you absolutely do everything together, but it’s happening. Juyeon has started to walk around bare chest when he gets out of the shower and sometimes! He even goes to bed naked, with just his pyjama pants hanging low on his hips.
Of course, you get to snuggle up against his warm chest and cuddle to sleep. When it comes to sleeping, you don’t even try to fall asleep on your own side of the bed anymore because you always wake up in each other’s arms. You have definitely grown closer and closer in just a few months.
Your touches with one another have become more sensual and romantic and your words more flirtatious. You wear his clothes more often than usual, sometimes getting out of bed in just his t-shirt and underwear, awakening certain feelings within him. From time to time, he dares to put his hands under your (his) t-shirt and kiss your forehead tenderly, for lack of being able to kiss your lips sensually and make you his, right when you wake up.
“All pretty for me hm?” He said the first time you went to sleep in this garment. “You know I’m just a man.”
And if you sat on his hips to cuddle him afterwards, maybe the message got through. Maybe a little too much, given that a few minutes later he pretended to be in a hurry and the water ran for a long time. He’s just a man.
Yes, your man.
Another time, when you were out shopping at the mall, people addressed you as a couple and you didn’t mind, oh no. Perhaps it was the smiley eye contact you made, or the way he held you in his arms and you leaned into him, almost as if you were going to kiss, that gave it away. At least, that’s what gave Sunwoo, who was watching you nearby, the courage to send you a message.
Woo ☼ (1)
Hi, hello! I saw you at the mall with Juyeon, can we talk? I’m with Changmin, we can ditch them together?
Hi Sunny!!! Sure we can, the cafe nearby?
Juyeon was a little reluctant to leave you alone with Sunwoo due to the countless nights you spent crying and the difficulty you had opening up (not to mention your blossoming love for Juyeon) but he quickly gave up because he knew you wanted it and he was happy to spend time with Changmin. Juyeon is the love of your life and you can’t pretend that he isn’t anymore.
“Hi Sweetheart, I saw you left your shopping bags with your man,” he laughs and you kick him under the table so as not to draw attention to yourself.
“Stop that Kim Sunwoo!” You whine.
“Stop what? Calling you sweetheart or calling him your man?”
“Both!” You laugh embarrassed and shy.
“How are you?” He changes the subject after one last laugh and you’re happy to see that he hasn’t changed, he’s still as playful and lively as ever.
“I’m fine, nothing has really changed since our last messages. I told you I got my dream job, so Juyeon and I are treating ourselves with my first salary. Oh, and Juyeon has also found a new job he’s really enjoying. Hence, the reason why we’re out shopping.” You went on to rave about your everyday life, happy to share this new chapter with him, whom you still love very much, just not romantically anymore.
“You must love him a lot,” he says softly, almost as if he were muttering to himself. “It’s cute, you’re cute, I’m happy for you.” And you don’t answer, curious to hear what he’s going to say next.
“I’ve been thinking about you a lot over the past six months,” he begins. “Thank you for always reaching out to me and not ghosting me despite the break-up, it meant a lot to me. Being away from you has been hard. I will not lie. But it also taught me that I was too dependent on you and it felt great to spend time by myself and with our friends. I got news from them and saw that you were doing well, as anyone going through a break-up would be. And it made me realise that, if you were fine, I should be fine, even if it was just a facade, that somehow the sadness would pass.”
You nod to let him know you’re listening and that you’re on the same wavelength as him.
“And it did,” he whispers almost happily, as if the weight he was carrying close to his heart has been lifted. “I thought I would love you for the rest of my life, but then I met someone.” You gasp at his words and tear up a little.
“It came as a blessing, without me even looking for it, and I can say that I’m happy now. So when I saw you so happy on Juyeon’s arm, looking at him lovingly like he hung the stars in the sky I thought: “Ah, you’re really on cloud nine with him”. I shouldn’t hold you back from your happiness. You have my blessing, not that you need it but date him, kiss him, make love and live happily ever after.” To emphasise his words, he squeezes your hand which he has started to hold somewhere in his monologue, and kisses it.
You swear you didn’t want to cry, and Juyeon will probably be worried to see your swollen eyes, but how can you remain impassive in the face of so much love? It’s true, you held back and would have kissed Juyeon if it wasn’t for Sunwoo. But now you’ll both be happy.
You chatted for quite a while, enjoying your reunion as friends, learning more about the person he had met and ranting about your life with Juyeon, when he appeared before you with Changmin, impatient to get you back. You missed him. How did you manage to live without Juyeon so far? Ecstatic, you jump into his arms and bid your goodbyes promising to meet again soon. As you walk away, Juyeon’s phone beeps and he just shrugs at the message in his inbox with a smile. Then he ruffles your hair, earning a pout from you that he kisses away at the corner of your lips. You wonder what the message was, but the kiss is definitely more important.
Sunwoo (1)
I’ve seen the way you look at each other, it’s full of love. Give it a shot!
Yes, there will be many more kisses now.
And here you are today, on Juyeon’s couch, enjoying your home date for the tenth anniversary of your friendship, with Sunwoo’s blessing in the back of your mind. You spent the day cooking together, sweet and savoury, having fun with the shapes of the cakes and pizzas (hearts and dicks like the children you are), playing games, dancing and listening to music in a good-natured atmosphere.
Today’s a day to celebrate your friendship. Yes friendship, when all you want to do is kiss him senseless. Maybe confessing today is not such a bad idea. Especially when you see him coming out of the shower in all his glory, beads of water running down his naked torso, hair tousled and wet, tongue running over his lips sensuously as he looks you straight in the eye, ready to pounce on you. Oh, and, his cinnamoroll pyjama pants, low on his hips and revealing the Apollo belt of his abs, make you smile as much as it turns you on.
Juyeon takes his place between your legs, smiling, his hot muscular back resting on your chest as he lays his head back on your shoulder, dampening your matching melody pyjamas. He chuckles as he turns his head to see you gawping. His big veiny hand that had been squeezing your thigh flies to your cheek, turning your flushed face towards him so he can kiss the pout at the corner of your lips. His beautiful lips linger a little longer on your neck, but you welcome his touch with open arms and lean into his embrace.
His eyes are full of stars when he rises from your embrace to grab the remote and turn on your series. But he remains seated between your legs, unconsciously resting a hand on your knee to preserve the intimacy you’re so immersed in. You help him on with his t-shirt, not without kissing his shoulder first, making him shiver. And your hands take the opportunity to wander down his torso to his waist, making him smirk as well. You become more and more adventurous, he loves it and can’t wait to run his lips all over your body, discovering all of it.
You place a kiss on the crown on his hair and when you notice that it’s already dry, an idea crosses your mind. Juyeon’s focus is back on the show, so much so that he can barely feel your hands playing with his hair. You give him a rather pleasant massage, moving down to the small of his chest, across his neck and up into his hair, twisting it between your fingers.
“How does it feel?” You murmured in a hushed tone.
“Heavenly,” he moans.
The tension is palpable as you continue your services, your hearts beating wildly, almost as one. He takes one of your hands in his to kiss it, the attention making you blush, before replacing it in his hair and nodding for you to continue. So you undertake one of the most romantic acts of love in your eyes, braiding his hair. Strand by strand, your fingers caress the edges of his face. The braids come undone as quickly as they are made, but he smiles broadly as he touches them, feeling butterflies in his stomach and his heart beating erratically.
“I could see our everyday life like this,” you whisper in his ear. “Together.”
Juyeon, who had been purring at your display of affection, becomes still when he hears your words. He slowly turns to face you with the most charming smile and tenderly takes your hand to place it on his chest, where his heart burns with love. The fire in his eyes burns inexorably, lighting up his already sunny face, unable to leave him. You’re captivated by this intensity and he doesn’t look away, also in love with your sparkling eyes, even when he reaches out to grab a little box that has always been right in front of your eyes. Yes, his love has always been on display. You were just too slow to catch on.
But you get it now. You’re two fools in love.
“You know how our youth is filled with each other’s names?” He says, voice a little hoarse and heart beating fast under your palm. “Well, my heart has never changed, I’ve always wanted to be with you. You are my breath of fresh air, the warmth that keeps me going through the winter, and the words I’m about to tell you will never melt away. My everything is all about you, it has always been about you.” He pauses to take a deep breath and kisses the palm of your hand, which he then links with his own, intertwining your fingers.
“I love you,” he sighs with love and happiness. “I love you so much that I was reading my destiny inside your eyes without even knowing it.” The flame of love he has carried all these years dances in his eyes, making him irresistible and captivating. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you wait for his question, palpitations he feels through your bound hands.
“Would you be mine?” His gaze, dropping to your lips then back to your eyes, is determined as he opens the velvet box to reveal two rings. Not just any rings, the matching promise rings to the bracelets you bought months ago. The ones on your wrists that you’ve never taken off.
As if on cue, as a sign of future commitment, he kisses your left ring finger and places the ring on your right with such tenderness that you almost cry. No, you’re pretty sure tears are rolling down your face because he puts his thumb under your eyes to gently wipe away the tears and kisses the salty drops that have run down your cheeks, close to your lips. With that, you mirror his actions by kissing the ring, his left ring finger and placing it on his right finger with a dazzling smile, as an unspeakable promise – that you’ll spend the rest of your lives together.
“I have always been yours. I love you Juyeon, so much that I’m going crazy.”
Even now, after confessing his feelings and hearing yours, he remains respectful and lets you make the first move with a victorious smile. You grin, feeling the cool material of the ring on your cheek as he cups your face in his hand, reminding you that this is all real and that he loves you.
And he does.
So you finally lean in, closing the gap between you to rest your lips on his. It was meant to be a soft and quick peck, but he captures your body and deepens the kiss, years of longing and wanting not to be wasted, leaving you breathless. His lips search yours every time you pull away, not wanting to let go, intoxicated by your lips and this new closeness. If you spend the rest of the evening making out and exploring each other, no one will say a word. Not even your neighbours.
Ah, you’ve never been in love and wanted to be with anyone as much as you do with him, and this since you were 16.
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pussypopstiel · 29 days ago
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Angel claire per @aubigney ‘s drawing prompt request 🙏🏼
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claireswhisperings · 8 months ago
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baby, we don't need no towel • i'ma be the one who rub your body now
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paige bueckers x fem!reader
synopsis: you can’t help but stare at paige when she comes over to build furniture for your dorm
warnings: suggestive, but no smut
wc: 1.5 k
masterlist
When Azzi enlisted you, Paige, and Jana to build her some shelves, who were any of you to say no to her? You all found your way onto yours and Azzi’s shared living room floor, each building a different part while Azzi sat there ‘encouraging,’ as she put it, all three of you. Two hours have passed with almost no progress being made due to you being constantly distracted by your blondie.
It’s sinful, really, the way Paige looks right now. Toned arms flexing with every move of the power drill, back arching when she leans back up to admire her and Jana’s hard work, her abs that tense when she lifts the shelf she is currently drilling. A thin layer of sweat covers her entire body, glistening when your girlfriend moves in the soft yellow lighting. Your eyes shamelessly rake over the upper half of her body, fully appreciating the fact that only a thin black sports bra is covering the top half of her body.
Azzi sits on the couch behind you, smiling silently when she notices the way you’re gawking at your half-naked girlfriend, not even noticing how quiet you’ve become, or how many pieces of the shelves you’ve dropped into your own lap.
“Hello?” her hand waves in front of your face, breaking your concentration on Paige’s abs. “Little distracted, are we?” she’s subtly teasing you, biting her hand slightly to keep from laughing out loud at you.
Paige, sporting a very cocky smile, ego growing by the tenfold at Azzi’s comments, taking a few steps closer as she turns her back to you to work on the part of the shelf Jana has been doing alone.
“Yeah, anything to share that’s interested you lately?” Paige’s smug voice rings out, slightly raspy. She fucking knows how good she looks to you right now, and you can see it in her eyes before she moves, choosing to turn back around so all you can see is her smooth back.
You roll your eyes, looking back at the building instructions while Azzi and Jana immerse in a conversation about a movie they had both recently seen. From her crouched position on the floor, Paige can feel your eyes subtly admiring her exposed body, choosing to arch her back slightly, leaning up to stretch her arms over her head, and offer you a side view of her body. Her face is painted with a huge smirk as your eyes catch hers, and you know she’s got you right in her trap.
You don’t notice Jana waving her arms and calling for you to get your attention, determined to finally finish one set of shelves. “Yeah?” you ask, slightly annoyed by all the distractions that prevent you from thinking about Paige for longer than you have been.
“Would you please help me, and hold this part of the shelf?” Jana’s voice is riddled with laughter at how long it takes you to respond and help her lift a section of the shelf frame so she can drill it in place.
Jana manages to drill in the last bit of the bar you’re holding, and you can take a small break, dropping your hands into your lap, and leaning back onto your heels. Paige slinks up beside you, nudging you with her shoulder to divert your attention away from Jana, who is muttering to herself about her next plan of action of building the shelf.
You and Paige exchange smirks, and you roll your eyes when her eyes drop to look at your tits, slightly visible in your own bra. “Come on now, eyes up here,” you point to your own eyes, hand dropping down to slightly caress and squeeze Paige’s bicep that she had moved by your head to entice you into feeling her up.
“Hey, no touching each other while I’m hard at work, please,” Jana’s voice rings out in front of you, and you and Paige roll your eyes playfully, squeezing her bicep one last time before you stand up move past Paige to sit next to Jana to help the girl. Paige pats your ass as you walk by, earning a quick swat to the head that she can’t dodge, but does get a laugh out of the girl, and she slumps down and looks at her phone.
Morgan props herself up behind Paige, showing her Azzi’s story, featuring her, Jana, and you. Flashing you a quick smile behind your back, she raises her voice, “Oh yeah, I get the appeal of this.” you turn around in curiosity, rolling your eyes to turn your back on Paige when she flashes you her screen, and you see Azzi’s story.
Paige turns back to her screen with a smile on her lips, seemingly done with teasing you for now. Her eyes zero in on you, sitting on your heels, looking at something way off the screen that shows off your side profile. Your tits and arms are on full display in your sports bra, and Paige’s eyes rake up and down the muscles you’re straining to lift up the shelf. Morgan notices this, laughing a little as she says, “Yeah and I bet you get the appeal of that.”
She gets up to go back to her place on the couch, passing by you to send you a small “Looking good champ.” You smile at Morgan, before turning your head back to Paige.
Azzi had shown you the photo before she posted it, and while you certainly weren’t denying Paige looked good in it, you did too. And you knew Paige liked how you looked in it, just as much as you liked how she did. She sends you a genuine smile, never one to not tell you how beautiful you are.
The shelves are more or less done, and everyone is unwinding for the night, all agreeing that finishing the shelves tomorrow is definitely a better idea. Will they be done tomorrow? Probably not. Does Paige care, when you’re in the kitchen, drinking some water after your work? Definitely not.
The girls are lounging on the couch and floor, moving the previously organised bolts and objects around. Paige finds her way to you, pressing a kiss to your temple when she passes by you to fish around for something in the fridge. You smile at her actions, busying yourself with playing with the rim of the glass with your finger, still eyeing your girlfriend in front of you, who still can’t seem to find one shirt to wear.
Paige’s head emerges from the fridge, face a little flushed from her knowing you’re still checking her out. 3 years together, and her heart still runs when you eye her the exact way you’re doing now. She leans into the counter beside you, eyes locked with yours while she eats something she found in the fridge.
Your own eyes drift down to her toned arms, one hand reaching out to caress her muscles. “You know, you should come by more often like this. I’ll break some things so you can repair them,” you mumble into her ear, pressing a kiss to her shoulder.
Her face turns a deeper shade of red, finishing the last bite of her food. Your nails slightly scrape at the skin of her bicep, grazing up and down her arm as she tries, and fails, to keep her composure. Your eyes are drifting down to her lips, biting the inside of your cheek playfully up at her.
“Put a shirt on Bueckers, come on now,” you playfully push her away. “Should you be saying something like that to the hired help?,” she takes the cup out of your hand, and puts it on the counter to move closer to you,
“Kidding, you know I don’t mind, baby,” her tone is seductive in your ears, and you briefly glance at the girls lying in various positions among the shelf pieces, all too tired and on their phones to even pay attention to you and Paige.
You grab her hand, leading her swiftly down the hall, and into your room. Paige shuts the door behind her, and you’re quick to push her against the wall, and grab her face to finally feel her lips on yours. Her hands grab your waist, pulling you closer to her, and feeling the curve of your bare hips that she had been eyeing all night.
You’ve both worked yourselves up, both of you too eager to do anything other than jump the other’s bones. Her face slowly heats up as you continue keeping her body against the door, enjoying the feeling of your hands running across her abs and arms, feeling her up even more than you were before.
“Been needing you all night Paige,” you let out, pressing open-mouthed kisses on her jawline. “Fuck, me too baby. I need you so bad, please,” she pants out in your ear. Her voice has lost all calmness when her hands slip under your bra, fingers grazing over the slightly exposed skin. Her head leans down to suck marks onto your neck, hand landing back on your hips to guide you onto your bed.
You both fall down onto the bed, you landing on top of her, as she whispers promises into your neck of making all your time staring at her worth it by the end of the night. You let out a sigh in her ears when she tugs your bra off, fingers massaging your tits while she lowers her mouth down to your chest.
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frodo-a-gogo · 1 year ago
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Let us be brutally honest with ourselves and with eachother for a moment. If he weren't obese you motherfuckers would be capable of percieving evrart claires sexy sexy moral ambiguity and complex charms
#i am (lesbian) sipping him like a fine DESSERT WINE#my evidence by the way is very simple and very damning. joyce messier. there i said it.#if you guys can appreciate the fact that Joyce is a complex figure worthy of disgust yes but also worthy of empathy#despite being a venal coward facilitating acts of violence and slaughter of the organized working poor of martinaise in the name of capital#if you can understand that she is a dimensional figure while also being an embodiment of the moral apathy and cruelty if capital owners#but you cant look at evrart and see that he is (while deeply flawed and morally suspect) also a dimensional figure#on top of the fact that his motivations are eminently relatable and dare i say it baser#and his greatest failing imho is in failing to advocate for the interests of *all* the poor of martinaise#opting instead to marginalize the inhabitants of the fishing village in favor of a power grab in the interests of himself and his union#though this is imo a bit of a grey area morally. undeniably a wrong and bad thing to do but done in service of clairs political goals#to gather power to advocate for the working class against ultraliberal monoliths like wild pines and fascistic orgs like krenel#still super wrong but i can follow the moral arithmetic there tho i don't like it#but like my point is if u can see that joyce is evil and pathetic but still cool and sexy but you consider clair flatly distasteful#thats cus hes not conventionally attractive#cus he is *every bit* as dimensional and interesting as joyce and he is not nearly as politically shite even if hes interpersonally a jerk
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nuthong · 6 months ago
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SPARE ME YOUR MERCY | EPISODE 8
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obibail · 1 day ago
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In the shadow of the Monolith.
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ponett · 2 months ago
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she spins
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koyoriin · 16 days ago
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next wip!
https://twitter.com/koyoriin https://patreon.com/koyorin https://instagram.com/koyori_n https://bsky.app/profile/koyorin.bsky.social
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kyaroscuro · 2 months ago
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Flower Bouquet
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Juyeon's a flower lover and a romantic at heart, so what would happen if you give him flowers instead?
pairing : boyfriend!juyeon x gn!reader genre : established relationship, fluff, first love warnings : love in its purest form, pet names (baby, dearest), implied making love, one curse word notes : i love juyeon and it shows? just me thinking about gifting him flowers and seeing him smile from the smell, colours and beauty. i'm definitely smitten. and if you ask, juyeon and yn are both teachers! words count : 4054
Dating Juyeon is the easiest thing in the word. He’s the sweetest man ever and always finds a way to show his love. Whether it’s through words, hugs, kisses or gifts he constantly surprises you with his devotion. You know he was raised in a loving family, so it’s natural for him to live up to that standard. His significant other should feel loved and cared for in every situation. This is just a minimal part of who Juyeon is, a passionately devoted and affectionate partner.
Your first and last love.
But there are other parts of Juyeon that he rarely shows to the world. Not because he’s embarrassed or self-conscious, but because he’s not close enough to them. Juyeon is all about smiles and kindness. That’s what made you fall in love with him.
However behind closed doors, with his friends, family and most importantly you, he lets himself be the real Juyeon. The tired Juyeon who wants nothing more than to crawl into your arms, breathe in the floral detergent on your clothes and firmly hold your hand while you tell him about your day. All at a slow and steady pace. Two souls bonding and bathing in the love that surrounds them. It’s a part you’ve embraced along with everything that makes him.
Your Juyeon. Your dear Juyeon, who’s as beautiful and delicate as a flower.
Speaking of flowers, you have taken a liking to them thanks to him. Camelias, roses, tulips, asters so many flowers with many different messages but they all have the same meaning. Love, in all its forms. That’s probably why, when you met him, you fell hopelessly in love with him.
It was a beautiful sunny day, and life was a bit boring, nothing to watch, nothing to do, just the warmth of the sun calling you out. You’re more of a homebody person, but on this day, a deep gut feeling had urged you to go outside. As if it was fate and you had to be in this park at this time.
The birds were singing happily in the cloudless blue sky, and the feeling of the sun’s cool rays on your body made the walk to the park all the more enjoyable. You didn’t know where you were going, following the rhythm of your heart and your footsteps. But for once you were content with your decision.
Then you reach the gate of the park, a twenty minute walk you know by heart, wandering to find the perfect spot. The place where you always sit, under the cherry blossom tree, facing the sun. There’s a bench next to the tree where you used to play as a child, but when you grew up you found this little piece of heaven and you haven’t left it since. It has seen many portraits of you, the one where you cried over a breakup and the sun dried your tears, or the one where you celebrated your driver licence with a cute cat cake. And it also got to watch you fall in love at first sight.
Your smile was contagious as you greeted the few passersby, but you don’t remember it falling as your sun-drenched eyes landed on him. He was sitting in your place, his long legs stretched out and his big hands picking up the flowers around him to make a bouquet. His vision was shielded by his other hand, picking out the prettiest flowers, but you could see the faint hint of a smile on his lips. Your footsteps were light, but loud enough for him to raise his head when you stopped in front of him. And oh, if your smile was infectious, his took your breath away.
“Hi, I’m Juyeon.” He begins with a delighted look, his voice rough from being unused. “I think you’re one drop-dead gorgeous flower and these tulips are for you.” He hands you the bouquet with an even more adorable smile and you already know that you’re going to be together.
After what seemed like an eternity of laughing and getting to know each other under the crimson sky, you parted with coffees in your hands and smiles on your faces. The dark brown hue of the sunset reflected in his eyes and you could see how handsome he was, “I think I’m in love.” You uttered in one breath.
“I’m the one in love with you.” He smiled into your face, kissed your lips ever so slightly and finally held your hands.
You’ve been together since that day, your souls brought together by the red thread of destiny. True love came in the form of flowers. Hence the love you both have for them and how you can always see a bouquet in your shared home. It’s a little attention, but it makes you smile every time.
Today was no exception. You came home to find a unique deep-toned red rose tied with a ribbon sitting proudly on the table. On the accompanying card, Juyeon’s effortless confession, “I love you,” is written with a heart. He must have dropped the flower off at home before leaving for his last class, taking care to place it in a vase. His romantic nature never ceases to amaze you. Even when he’s tired, angry or sad, he’ll make sure to put your happiness first, because you’re the reason for his smile. Then how can your days be bad when he’s with you?
“Baby, I’m home.” Juyeon says in a worn out voice, kicking his shoes to run to you like he always does when he’s tired.
“Welcome home Juyo, how was your day?” You whisper, hugging him and absentmindedly stroking his hair.
“Don’t even start, it’s much better to be in your arms and listen to your heartbeat.” He smiles weakly and snuggles closer to you.
This sweet comment made your heart beat faster and Juyeon let out a muffled laugh at the quickening pace. But one thought clouded your mind ever since he returned home. How do you repay the favour? How can you make his heart beat as fast as he does? How could you make him so nervous and shy that you could kiss away the pout from his plump lips?
If you ask him, he’ll say that whatever you do is enough. Your presence beside him, your hand in his or the way you move is enough to make him panic. He’s hopelessly in love with you. He wants you whole. You may have been together for years and counting, but the feelings are still as strong as when you first met in the park.
“Did you like the rose?” He asks in hushed tones, after pecking you several times on the lips and getting you both up to eat.
The rose, yes. It may be the answer to all your questions : he loves flowers as much as you do, but you never offered him any.
“Did you like it so much that you had to scream?” He laughs heartily, feeling energised by your reaction. His eyes also sparkle with joy and you can see how happy it makes him. A simple rose he bought thinking of you.
“I love it so much Juyo. In fact, it made me smile so much that I looked like a fool.” You laugh in unison at your outburst and confession. “But you already know that I’m a fool to you. Thank you, for always thinking of me, even in the small details. And thank you for making me happy. You have no idea how much I love you Lee Juyeon.”
As you observe his cheeks turn pink, you stand up on tiptoe to bridge the height difference between you and kiss him tenderly. His arms find their place on your waist while your hands wrap around his neck, making him shiver as you lovingly caress his hair. You stay in this position for a moment, enjoying the intimacy, and soon the butterfly kisses become dirty tongue kisses.
That’s it, you’re going to buy him flowers and enjoy watching his smile widen until it hurts.
Your plan is quite simple. After dinner and the few kisses you shared, you want him to feel loved. It’s always easy to get intimate with Juyeon, he’s a very loving lover. As much as he likes to receive, he gives most of the time. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t love being on the receiving end. Especially when he’s exhausted after a long day and you look so good on top of him, cherishing every part of his body with that sultry gaze. Tending to Juyeon’s needs and seeing his lustful stare twist with pleasure as he comes undone is a part of your everyday life. It’s definitely not part of the plan, but it can’t hurt to use your power to satisfy him.
It's when he wakes up the next day, with love bites on his torso and a wide smile on his face that you take action. To prepare his favourite breakfast, you got up a little earlier than usual. Juyeon doesn’t like to wake up alone, he once told you that he wants to start and end his days with you. So he subconsciously whimpered when you pulled away from his warm embrace, but the loving kiss you planted on his forehead made him beam with satisfaction. You froze for a moment at the display of affection on his sleeping form, how could a man be so in love that it showed even in his slumber?
“You have no idea how much you drive me crazy.” You murmur against his lips and kiss him one last time.
He wakes up happy, with you wrapped in his strong arms, a tray of freshly brewed coffee, pancakes and fruit in the shape of a flower on the nightstand.
“Hi baby, slept well?” He asks tenderly, blinking to adjust to the sudden brightness.
“How could my night be bad when you hold me tight enough to make me feel safe and cosy?” You can’t help but chuckle at his drowsy state as he eagerly searches your lips and takes in his surroundings.
“Answer the question dummy.” He laughs softly, his eyes fluttering shut as his mouth finally finds yours in a honeyed kiss.
“Like a baby.” You snuggle closer into his arms to be enveloped in his scent and warmth. “Let me hold you a little longer Juyo.”
“Anything for you dearest.” The smile you feel on your hair is barely a whisper as he plants several kisses on it, but actions speak louder than words. It means the world to him that your arms are wrapped around his waist in an affectionate hug and, that you’re peppering kisses all over his flowery torso. His heart is so full of love that it’s overflowing and he could make love to you right now.
“Wait, what’s the smell?” He asks, suddenly hyper aware of the sugary scent and the lingering taste of your saccharine lips.
“Surprise,” you say airily, sticking your head out from under his arms and gazing lovingly into his. “I wanted to do something for you, so I made breakfast.”
Juyeon gawks at you for minutes on end until he feels your hand drawing random patterns on his naked torso, sending shivers down his spine. And just like that, his attention is drawn to the bedside table and then back to you. He stands there, mouth agape, lovesick eyes riveted to your face, looking for answers. As he watches you get up to sit on his lap, his quizzical expression becomes more pronounced and then you burst out laughing.
“Have an amazing day my baby”. You mirror the colourful post it note you wrote and plant a fond kiss on his lips. You can’t get enough of the touch of his lips, brushing them again and again to convey your feelings. “I wanted to take care of you.”
“You didn’t have to,” he replies, placing his burning hands on your waist to steady you before returning your kiss with even more fervour. “Waking up to the sunlight on your fine, serene face and being able to kiss you first thing is far enough.”
You fall into a passionate embrace, physically unable to tear yourself away from him to get ready. It may not be much, but you know he loved the gesture. And you don’t intend to end it here.
When he finally leaves the house with one last desperate kiss -as if he hasn’t kissed you in days- you go over your plan thoroughly. It’s pretty easy, as natural as when you first met him.
1 – Clean the house until it shines (Juyeon likes to keep things clean), even if it means making a mess later.
2 – The most important step! Buy flowers, roses to scatter around the bedroom, tulips to decorate the living room and a huge bouquet to fit his even bigger hands.
3 – Pick him up with coffee and flowers and watch his face light up with a smile as he strides towards you.
You can already picture how it’s going to go, you in the middle of the corridor with a voluminous floral arrangement, and him surprised to see your petite figure hidden by the flowers. Students and teachers coming and going would look at you with malice and astonishment, but Juyeon would only have his eyes on you. A look of amusement would appear on his face as he wondered why you were standing there blushing, before he would sprint through the crowd to make you spin around in delight. Maybe he would even seal this unexpected event with a kiss to show your affection to the crowd.
Except, it didn’t really go as planned.
Cleaning, shopping and decorating took much longer than you thought, so you didn’t have time to prepare dinner, and now you’re late to pick him up. But if the timing is a little off, it’s no big deal because you look as stunning as the flowers.
When you pull in the parking lot, the first thing you notice is the lack of cars. Suddenly, the thought hits you that Juyeon has already left work. It’s not that late, but it’s Friday and everyone usually goes home early. But on the other hand, you reason, Juyeon always sends you a message when he is on his way home. So he must be there.
You’re rarely in this building, so it’s hard to find your way around, but you know Juyeon’s office by heart. You recall the mahogany door with his name carved in bold gold letters, the rough ebony desk with your framed picture on it, and the computer that dominates the room. He must be sitting cross-legged in his office chair, glasses perched on the end of his nose, correcting papers. Not forgetting the comfortable sofa on which he often throws his jacket, and which has seen more than its share of students.
His office was your secret rendezvous when you weren’t living together. Whether it was early in the morning or late at night, you always met there to share breakfast or dinner, laughter, corrections and kisses. It has also seen a parade of flowers, including the bouquet of lilies he gave you with the key to his house -your current house- asking you to move in together.
Juyeon always gave you flowers. For important and unimportant matters. It’s a way for him to express his feelings. But also because he loves flowers. The different kinds and colours, the crossbreeding, the meanings. And with that in mind, you’re the most delicate flower he’s ever come across. Standing proud, never wilting and always so bright. Longing for love to bloom, but always meeting his love. You’ve brought colours to his life, blooming every year until the day it’s his turn to blossom. And when that day comes, he’ll be down on one knee with a ring and a bouquet of roses in his hand.
The corridors are reasonably empty, with only a few weary students passing through. You had imagined a grandiose scene, a display of love, but a more intimate declaration doesn’t sound so bad. Just the two of you. Flowers in your hands, smiles on your faces and love in the air.
Your heart pounds as you knock on the door marked “Lee Juyeon”.  Too eager to see him, you almost forget the surprise weighing heavily on your arms and stop yourself from rushing in.
“Come in!” You hear him whisper-shout in an exhausted voice and you let yourself in, wanting nothing more than to embrace his tiredness.
He is indeed sitting at his desk, his eyes glued to his copies and his eyebrows furrowed. Too focused, he hasn’t looked up to see who’s visiting him this late, probably waiting for that person to say something. And you have to admit, he looks pretty sexy that way, with his sleeves rolled up at the elbows to let the veins run down his forearms. Your gaze must also be burning as he glances around the room before staring at you, his cat-like eyes widening as surprise spreads across his face.
“B-baby?” He stutters, so startled that a blush spreads across his cheeks.
“Surprise,” you murmur, laughing softly for the second time today. “You’re always thinking of me, so today I wanted to be the one to make you smile. These are for you.”  
Grinning from ear to ear, you hold the heavy bouquet out to him. You observe how his posture gradually relaxes as he realises you’re standing right in front of him. His eyes, previously frowning, widen. And finally, his face, flushed with emotion, turns into a dazzling smile.
“You came here,” he begins in a deep voice. “To give me these flowers?”
Somewhere in those words, he stands up, completely abandoning his unfinished work, to come to you in a feline gait. “Couldn’t it wait until I got home?”
“I-“ Now it’s your turn to falter. “I just wanted to do something unexpected. You know, surprise you.”
His confident gait makes you step back, head down, until the back of your knees touch the sofa. You almost fall over, but his muscular arm grabs you by the waist and pulls you against his chest.
“Shit sorry, did that sounded too harsh?” You look up to see the concern in his dark eyes behind his rimmed glasses, and the apologetic but bright smile that takes your breath away. There he is, your sincere, respectful boyfriend. Your hopelessly smitten Juyeon.
“Y-yes.” You nod at his words, suddenly blushing at the close intimacy and mesmerised by his handsomeness. “I thought you were unhappy that-.”
“Oh no baby, not at all.” He cuts you off, shaking his head frankly at the thought that he might have made you doubt your surprise. “It’s quite the opposite. I was so pleasantly surprised, so astonished to see you there, looking so pretty, that I panicked.”
“You’re always so thoughtful, like this morning when I noticed the cute flower shape and I literally lit up.” He mumbles as he rests his forehead against yours and hugs you tighter, crushing the bouquet slightly between your bodies. “And now you’re here with the most amazing surprise ever and you expect me to keep my composure?”
It takes everything he has not to dive into your lips and give you a warm-hearted kiss. Instead, he reluctantly pulls away from your embrace to look at the bouquet. Your heated gaze follows him as he slowly -as if not to frighten you- bends down to smell it, laughing as the movement pulls you along with him.
“They’re the prettiest flowers I’ve ever seen. And I know you chose them for this purpose, but your incomparable beauty will always surpass them.” His melodious laughter echoes in your ears as you pat him gently on the chest. “Thank you baby, I appreciate it beyond words.”
Then his beaming smile expands into a grin as he grabs you by the hips and lifts you up. Next thing you know, your hands are gripping his shoulders to keep you from falling, and you manage to keep the bouquet from dropping. Even though his firm grip was enough to keep you in place.
His gaze, full of mischief and love, then rests on your lips. And as if drawn by a force of attraction, your lips meet in a tentative but dizzying kiss. Unable to pull away, you devour his now languid kisses. Hungry mouths exploring each other despite the familiarity. Sloppy kisses turn into a messy make out as you tangle one hand in his hair, your cheeks burning and your chest warm.
Juyeon keeps kissing you until he’s out of breath and his lungs constrict. And even then he dives in again, feeling warm all over. He squeezes your butt lightly, making you giggle into the kiss, and the soft sound of your laughter tingles through his lower abdomen. In one last tender kiss, you feel yourself spinning with him, the rocking motion making you both burst into laughter. Blood rushes through your veins and your hearts pound in your chests, so much so that your heartbeats are in unison. Eventually, he’ll have to put you down due to muscle contractions, but he’ll remember the certain feelings this position awakened.
“Should we head home now?” He says unhurriedly, because you have plenty of time to enjoy each other’s presence in the form of touches or kisses. Or even flowers.
His arms curl around your waist, slipping under your shirt to trace the curves of your bare skin. It’s so intimate that you can’t help but moan with satisfaction. Probably wanting more of your caresses, he takes the bouquet in his arms with a broad smile, admiring the vibrant colours that complement each other. Just like you the two of you.
Your hand, previously nestled in his hair, moves along his jaw to rest on his chest. Not slowed down by your sensual kisses, his heart beats loudly against your palm. He’s so utterly in love that a simple touch sends shivers down his spine and butterflies into his stomach. With a disarming smile, you stroke his cheek and stand on tiptoe to kiss him for the umpteenth time. Just a brush of your lips, your bodies pressed against each other, until you get carried away and…
“Oh my god, dinner!” You exclaim, your head falling into his chest as you remember your lack of time to cook.
“What about dinner baby?” Juyeon laughs as he caresses your hair, twirling a few strands in a soothing way.
“I’ve been so obsessed with making the perfect surprise, cleaning and sprinkling rose petals around our room, picking out a cute outfit you’d like and getting ready, that I haven’t had time to cook.” You ramble on about your busy day, not noticing how his face lights up as you go.
“You did all this for me?” He lifts your head to meet your eyes, speaking ever so softly. “You went so far as to put flowers in our bedroom? Not to mention you’re the most beautiful flower and you’re mine.”
Your mouth opens but no sound comes out, so you just nod, a rosy glow coating your cheeks. He chuckles, smitten by the sight, and whispers “pretty” without realising it.
“I am the luckiest man in the world to have you. Thank you for always treasuring me, you have no idea how much that means to me. It’s so sweet to know that you love me so much, and I love you so much, that I would gladly break my heart for you.”
“Please don’t,” you chuckle at his unique confession. “But I would love to put the pieces back together for you.”
His enchanting smile hypnotises you and he takes the opportunity to take your hand in his, covering it completely. He plays with your fingers, kissing them one by one until he reaches your palm, on which he plants a light but meaningful kiss. And naturally, his fingers intertwine with yours in a delicate embrace.
“Let’s have dinner on the way home, shall we?” Juyeon says with a lascivious look, smelling the flowers once more. “So we can have dessert at home.”
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xxdrixx · 3 months ago
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❥ Countdown to Daredevil: Born Again - 7 days left Daredevil Season 1 Episode 05 - World on Fire
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itsalittlebitchilly · 3 months ago
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If I was 8 months pregnant and my plane had been crashed on an island for 2-3 weeks and I was really craving peanut butter so this dorky guy who's kinda cute promised to get me some but when he came back he had an empty jar and when I asked him wtf was going on he went 'wowie this peanut butter is yummy 😋' and stuck his finger in the jar of nothing and licked it off I would take him to the ocean and hold him under until he stopped moving
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claireswhisperings · 7 months ago
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I just want your lips right between my hips
paige bueckers x fem!reader
synopsis: Just imagine tying Paige up and fucking yourself on a vibrator while she watches…begging to either touch you or get touched…could read as draft!Paige since she had that tie. 
warnings: smut
w/c: 1k
masterlist
Paige’s wrists are tied up above her head, binding her to her headboard as she watches your movements. Her hands flex as she pulls against her own tie keeping her constrained, something you’d both been eager to do all evening.
You circle your clit with the vibrator, lowering it slightly to tease your hole. You let out a breathless moan as your head rolls back from pleasure. Paige’s eyes are trained on how wet you are, leaking over the vibe and onto the bedsheets under you. 
“Please, come on, I need to touch you,” she pants out, eyes going glossy when you shake your head, ignoring her. 
Your legs spread farther, and Paige feels her clit throb between her own at the sounds of your pussy clenching around nothing. She lets out whines when she can’t undo the tie, head dropping back in frustration. 
Her eyes drift up to your tits, where your other hand is palming and pulling at your nipples as moans spill from your lips. You open your eyes, making eye contact with her when you push the tip of the vibe in your pussy, a drawn out moan of her name leaving your mouth. 
She clenches her thighs together, trying to ignore how hard her pussy’s throbbing for you, with her eyes unblinking and focused on only you and everything you’re doing. Your hips move in a circular motion, grinding down on the vibe, letting out moans of her name. 
“You know I’d make you feel so much better than that, please let me touch you” she’s desperate now, legs shaking without having even been touched. She’s getting off on your moans and movements, begging you to let her touch you. You roll your eyes at her words. She’d begged you to tie her up earlier tonight, and this is what she wanted after all. 
Your pussy clenches around nothing again, more arousal spilling out from your pussy. You let out a gasp when you feel it seep down your fingers, wetting them even more. Paige eyes your fingers, eyes flitting up to meet yours so you get what she needs.
You smile, lifting your fingers up to her mouth and slipping them in. Paige lets out a moan when she finally tastes you, letting her eyes roll back as she sucks on your fingers. Her tongue moves expertly around your fingers, and you slightly push them deeper down her throat. 
She goes a bit cross eyed, focusing on the feeling of your fingers and taste in her mouth. Her head dips forward, forcing your fingers further down her throat while she maintains eye contact. 
“That’s it, you can take it, can’t you?” she lets out another whine at your words, nodding her head. “Good girl.” Tears are gathering in the corners of her eyes as she grinds against the air, knowing it’s hopeless in making her feel any pleasure. 
You remove your fingers, almost missing the quiet and desperate “No!” that leaves her lips as you bring her spit soaked fingers down to your cunt, slowly pushing them inside you. Your hips move up and down as you ride your fingers, pressing and circling the vibe down onto your clit. 
She’s beyond frustrated and wet at this point, just needing your hands on her. She needs your mouth on her, needs to feel your fingers inside her, needs to feel you on top of her, needs to hear your praises in her ears. 
A wet patch has formed on the bed underneath your desperate girlfriend, the mark making you practically salivate. You throw your head back, whimpers flying out of your lips as you move your fingers inside you in a ‘come hither’ motion, pushing against the spot that has your legs squeezing shut. 
You cum with a cry of her lips, clenching your eyes shut as you feel your cum leaking down your thighs and onto her already ruined sheets. Paige throws her head back, the sounds of her name being yelled like that making her cum untouched, legs squeezing together as she lets out a broken whimper of your name. 
You slow the movements of the vibe, allowing yourself to come down. You glance at Paige, her head still resting against the pillow, neck fully exposed for you. You notice her cum leaking out of her pussy, and reach up to stroke her thighs in comfort.
Her eyes fly open, tears running down her flushed face. You toss the vibe off to the side, and climb on her lap to stroke her face. “You okay baby? That wasn’t too much?” your hands move to untie her wrists as she shakes her head no. 
Her wrists are red from her straining against her tie all night, and you press kisses on her skin, giving her a moment to catch her breath. She’s panting, still crying when you pull her in to kiss all over her face, mumbling praises into her skin.
“You took that so well, baby,” you emphasize each word with kisses on whatever part of her face you can reach. You pull back to see her perfect blue eyes staring at you, tears still shining in them. 
You lie down, manoeuvring her to lie on top of you, still massaging the skin of her wrists. Her breathing has returned to her usual calm beat, tears drying up. Her head rests against your chest, before she sits up to press her lips to yours, mutters of “I love you,” escaping. 
She sits up next to you, propping herself up on her elbow to look at you lying down. Your fingers play with the strands of her hair that are hanging over you, tucking them behind her ear and stroking her cheek.
“Never knew you could cum just from watching me,” you’re cocky right now, pleased with how she reacts to just watching you. You watch her face turn a bright red shade as she sucks on her teeth and lets out, “Yeah yeah, don’t gotta say that you know.”
“Just thought you’d want the reminder,” it’s your turn to prop yourself on your elbow, pressing a kiss on her lips, moaning into it when you feel her tongue slide into your mouth. 
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beefycupcakes · 9 months ago
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futurebritishgentleman · 2 months ago
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"I know you. And I know you'll stay strong."
Day 7: Beginning | End
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tordoise-x3 · 7 months ago
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I love you so much birkin sorry i made you more horrific
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swanthief · 3 months ago
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every night in my dreams, i see you, i feel you that is how i know you go on far across the distance and spaces between us you have come to show you go on
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