#choi saeyoung angst

[kiichikonoes]

space wife

[onlinekitsune]

LET ME IN: SAEYOUNG CHOI (PART TWO)

"make your way to me through the waves"

PAIRING, GENRE, WARNINGS ─ saeyoung choi x gnc!reader, not proofread, this is mostly comfort?? kinda just on saeyoung's side sorrryyy

SYNOPSIS ─ after a bit of an argument played out, between you. saeyoung returns back inside of the bedroom. unaware that you're actually awake, he begins to talk out his feelings.

WRITER’S NOTE ─ a handful of people requested a part two of the original!! which i honored and very gratful for!! i have a hard time liking my content, so when others tell me they enjoyed it, it means a lot! i tried my best with this but, kinda lost where i was going with it. again, a bit of dialogue is taken directly from the game. (day 8/9 iirc) i hope you enjoy! and again, thank you for all your kind words and support! i know i am off and on about posting content on here, but know that your words aren't just ignored!! so erm... anyways. do you think i could do a part three lmao

Your dreams were hard to recall as you continued to lay still in bed. Perhaps that was for the better, a dream about the argument prior or even recalling happier times in the chatroom would haunt you. You took a deep breath, not bothering to even open your eyes or get up. You felt exhausted, mentally and physically. It was ironic to you how crying provided the same effects as if you were to actually do something straining. Your hand slid through your sheets, blindingly guiding you to your phone. Before you could even reach it, you hear the door creak open. You laid completely still, unsure of what to do. Footsteps gently got closer, stopping as they reached right in front of you. The sound of fabric brushing against each other filled the room. Your heart raced, not sure what to expect. But you continued to stay still.

“You’re… asleep? Good.” Seven sighed, breaking the silence. He reached out his hand, brushing against the sheets. "You’re really quiet while you’re sleeping...” The room returned to its silence for a moment. You felt him lean his upper body on the bed, only being able to assume that he was kneeling before you. “You’re something, you know? I… must have hurt you by saying all those things, but you somehow manage to still be so bright. Even now. You remind me of the 707 I pretend to be in the chatroom. You have more in common with him than… Saeyoung.”

Your face slightly furrowed, hearing his voice become soft and vulnerable. You so desperately wanted to sit up and comfort him. But, you knew that if you did he’d immediately retreat. You continued pretending to be asleep, allowing him to continue. 

“Saeyoung is dark and pessimistic. His cold and complicated personality is the true me. I-I can’t wear the mask of the happy-go-lucky 707. I want you to realize that and be disappointed. I’m not a fun and cool person. I can put you in danger. So, don’t waste your feelings on me. I know telling you this won’t stop you. You’re so strange.” He continued. Hearing him talk bad about himself made your heart ache. If only he knew. If only he could see himself from your perspective. His hand hovered over yours before gently placing it on top, dissipating your thoughts. His touch was gentle, as if any friction could cause you to crumble beneath his fingers. “No, it's not you that's strange. It’s me. You’re actually… so nice and warm. You know, I… I sometimes dream about you accepting the real me. It’s a ridiculous dream, I know. But, thank you for allowing me to dream, at the very least.” His thumb brushed against the back of your hand before slipping away. 

The silence filled the room again, accompanied by your heartbeat in your ears. The weight on the bed returns to how it was, as he gets up. “Please, remember in your dreams that you can’t trust V… or even me. Be less nice to me, so that when I disappear, you won’t be hurt. Don’t trust anyone, and promise me you’ll stay safe. Allowing me to protect you is more than enough. It’s more than I deserve. It’s enough for Saeyoung.” He uttered, slowly turning away from you. You snuck a glance, seeing that he was now facing away from you but stood still.

“Saeyoung.” You let out, softly. You shifted from the bed, sitting up against the headboard. 

“I didn’t mean to wake you. I was just leaving-”

“Saeyoung. Please. Just wait a second.” You pleaded, looking up at him with soft eyes. He winced, hearing his name come from you a second time. He took a deep breath, and turned around to face you. He kept a straight face, but you could see the ache in his eyes. “Can we sit and talk?” You added. He hesitated, but ultimately gave in. He sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the floor.

“So, I can assume you heard everything?”

“I…Yes, I did. I didn’t want to pretend to be asleep but, also didn’t want you to run off.” you answered, grabbing onto your wrist. Your gaze met him as he turned his head to look at you. “Listen, I know how you feel. Pretending to be this happy-go-lucky person. I have experience with that, clearly. I don’t know how much you actually found out about me but… just know we have that in common, okay? I like yo-”

“Even if you say you like me, my life can’t embrace anything. You don’t know how it feels to live this kind of life. You shouldn’t be nice to me when you don’t know anything. The person you truly like is the 707 in the chatroom, just… forget about me. About this.” he interrupted, turning away from you. He was mere moments from leaving out the door, you felt it. And if he did, it’d return you back to where you were. In a moment of desperation, you bolted forward, hugging him from behind.

“Then please, help me understand the person in front of me…” You muttered, resting your head on his back. Saeyoung didn’t pull away, or even try to. He stood frozen, unable to comprehend what his mind was going through.

“You!” He let out, stunned. His eyes shut, slowly giving in to your affection. “Why are you doing this to me? You’re making this harder than it should. I live a dangerous life, one you don’t need to be involved in. I couldn't even protect my own brother… I have to abandon the person I adore. My life is good for nothing.”

“I’ve been through a bomb and a hacker, it’s a little too late for me to not be involved. I like the you that’s in front of me. Regardless of how complicated anything else is, I want to know you.”  

Saeyoung shook his head, taking a deep breath. “Please, don’t do this. Don’t make this harder than it needs to be. I… cherish you. I want to make you happy, but I can't! Why do you want to be with me when my life is so dangerous? Why do you… even like me?” He asked, his voice trailing off ever so subtly. You break off the hug, and sit beside him on the edge of the bed. 

“It’s more complicated than that. I can’t give a simple answer. I just like you, Saeyoung.”

“You’re impossible. What are you going to do if something happens to you because of me? What then?”

You gave him a soft smile, before reaching out to grab his hand. He didn’t bother to stop you, or even pull away. “No matter what happens, I won’t regret my feelings for you.” you uttered, now brushing your thumb across his hand. Another sigh, and again he shut his eyes for a moment. 

“I don’t know anymore. You’re so strange. I.. feel like i’m going strange too. No matter what I do… I can't seem to get rid of your feelings for me. Nothing good will happen by being close to me, you know. It’ll be too late to regret it later.” He muttered. You let go of his hand, placing it on his shoulder. You slightly tugged at him to turn. You two faced each other directly. You saw the sadness, the despair, the anguish in his eyes. Up close this time. 

“There’s no way I'll regret being with you, Saeyoung.” you softly replied, gently cupping his face. He stood there, as if he was afraid to touch you. To give into the affection. 

“You shouldn’t say that too easily. Ugh. I always told myself that I wouldn’t ever want to grow close to someone. But you’re making that so… complicated. I- I can’t believe you’re getting to me. Gods, what am I supposed to do now?” He asked, reaching to hold your forearms. You let out a soft breath, before leaning closer to him.

“First, just take some time and think about accepting my feelings. We can figure out the rest from there, alright?.” you answered, tilting your head slightly. You wanted to be his light, especially now.

“Alright… I’ll need some time.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll wait.”

[nek0mars]

//tw eye strain

ANOTHER REDRAW this time, angst

[mxsticmess]

something something the fear of being vulnerable

[anne-chloe]

Agent 666

Mystic Messenger

Seven/707 x F!Agent!Reader

WIP | Summary : Agent 707 made himself infamous in the Intelligence Agency by being the youngest and most successful hacker, being able to complete tasks set to him in half the amount of time expected. However, Seven finds himself in a difficult position when a newcomer joins, posing as his biggest rival yet. Agent 666.

Alternative Title: Rival

“Agent 707.”

Seven tugged off his headphones and swivelled round in his seat, a look of curiosity upon his round face as he engaged his superior face-to-face. He wasn’t so concerned with the fact that his superior was speaking with him, but more so that it was in person rather than through a senior colleague.

“Yes, sir?” Seven asked awkwardly, clearing his throat as it cracked on a few syllables. Having not spoken for a few hours, his throat was feeling somewhat dry and uncomfortable.

However, Seven’s attention then diverted to the young girl standing at his superiors side. She looked to be about his age, with long [hair colour] hair and piercing [eye colour] eyes. The girl seemed distracted as she glanced around the room, which happened to be full of computer monitors and various other agents busy with their assignments. There wasn’t much noise other than the tapping of keys.

“I’d like to introduce you to Agent 666,” the man said coolly, gesturing politely to the young girl at his side. Seven straightened in his chair, confused and curious all at the same time. He stuck out his hand and watched as the girl hesitated in shaking it; she eyed him skeptically before accepting the friendly gesture. “Agent 666 has joined our ranks and will be within the same unit as you. Seeing as you are both of similar age…”

Seven raised a brow in question, urging his superior to continue. But his superior stopped and cleared his throat, then stepping back and patting Agent 666’s shoulder in encouragement. “Agent Vanderwood will be around shortly to hand you off some assignments. In the meantime, allow Agent 707 to keep you company.”

Bewildered with the fact that he was being lumped with a newcomer, Seven continued to stare at Agent 707 with the deepest set of confusion. It wasn’t uncommon for new starters to randomly appear, but it was most unlikely for someone of his age to appear like this.

Agent 666 fiddled awkwardly with the sleeves of her shirt, shifting on the spot and avoiding Seven’s eye. They both remained quiet like this for a while, with nothing but the sound of clicking keys and tapping noises to accompany them. There were a few questions on the end of Seven’s tongue: Why was she here? How old is she? Where did she learn to hack? Is she good at hacking? What was her backstory?

Seven knew a lot of these were personal questions, and everyone at the agency had hidden secrets. Nobody knew one another’s true identities for the sake of keeping themselves safe from a life they ran away from. The work at the Intelligence Agency was extremely dangerous, and nobody wanted their personal life tied in with that. Seven had a lot of secrets too, many that he wanted to forget about but couldn’t.

But he couldn’t help his curiosity.

“Luciel, I see you’ve met our newbie already.” Agent Vanderwood approached from behind, smirking arrogantly. In his hands he held a stack of documents, which Seven knew to be case files based on the coloured wallet placed on top. “Agent six-six-six,” Vanderwood said slowly, coming to a stop in front of the new agent. He extended his arms and the girl took the documents in a very robotic motion. “Did you both get to know each other?”

Seven shook his head slowly. “No…”

Vanderwood chuckled, proceeding to nudge Seven’s shoulder in a playful manner. Seven tensed at the action and tried to play it off, but he was just as awkward as the new girl, if not more so. Considering Seven had been at the agency now for a couple years, he should have settled in better, but in reality he hadn’t. It was a life he struggled to adjust to.

“Never mind. Come along Agent 666,” Vanderwood called, gesturing for the new girl to follow him.

Seven caught Agent 666’s gaze before she walked away, leaving Seven to watch in slight discomfort.

…

“Did you hear?”

“About what?”

“Agent 666—she’s incredible! She brought down that black market in seconds! Our team was struggling with that one for weeks…”

After returning from a quick toilet break, Seven found himself eavesdropping on someone’s conversation. It was a group of middle aged men, all of them experienced agents and talented with hacking. However, their gossiping caused Seven to pause by the water fountain, where he found his eyes widening in surprise at the new girl’s abilities.

The case involving the black market had been something the Intelligence Agency were tasked with bringing down months ago. The case had swapped hands multiple times, with each agent involved explaining that the assignment was too deep rooted to get into. Seven wasn’t given the chance to even look at the document itself, which he found surprising.

“Excuse me.”

Seven flinched as a small voice called out from behind him. Turning around on his heel, Seven felt his heart hammer at the sight of Agent 666 standing there rather awkwardly. Her shoulders were squared and she looked uncomfortably stiff; her eyes were ducked downwards as she spoke, as if she didn’t want to make eye contact with Seven at all.

“Oh, you…” Seven mumbled, feeling himself fluster with nerves. He couldn’t understand why his heart was beating so strangely, nor why his cheeks were burning up like this. Seven cleared his throat, his hand flying up and scratching the back of his neck. “I, uh… I heard about your success in bringing down one of the black market assignments… congratulations.”

Agent 666 peered up shyly. She then quickly looked away as Seven caught her eye. “Um… thank you…”

Silence consumed them both. Seven took this opportunity to properly look at her. She wore a large black hoodie, which was definitely several sizes too big on her, and a pair of worn looking leggings with a small hole in one of the knees. Her hair was long and looked like it hadn’t been brushed, so there were knots and tangles.

It seemed as though that Agent 666 had been brought straight to the agency from wherever she had lived before. The neglect of her was glaring, and it reminded Seven of how him and Saeran used to look to others before he joined the Intelligence Agency—before Jihyun and Rika helped him escape from his home.

Seven blinked slowly at Agent 666. She was still standing in front of him, looking awkward and nervous and rather fidgety. Seven couldn’t understand why she had approached him like this if she wasn’t about to maintain a conversation—because isn’t that what she’s supposed to do if she approached him first?

“Are you… are you getting water?” She finally asked after stuttering so much. Agent 666 pointed at the water fountain behind Seven.

Seven’s mouth dropped slightly in surprise, and then embarrassment consumed him. Agent 666 hadn’t wanted to speak with him at all, she just wanted some water. It was then that Seven spotted the empty bottle on her hand, and suddenly he felt like a complete idiot.

“I… no, I’m not, sorry,” Seven mumbled, stepping out the way. Agent 666 said nothing else as she finally began filling her bottle, and once that was done she made a swift exit without even glancing at him. Seven could only contain the urge to bang his head against the wall.

“She’s really good, you know?”

Seven scowled slightly as Vanderwood appeared from behind, now leaning against the wall and grinning mischievously at him. “You’d better watch out seven-oh-seven, she’s coming for your title.”

Seven stiffened at the very idea. “What?”

Vanderwood, pleased that he caught his attention with such bait, merely hummed. “Nervous?”

Seven straightened his shoulders and puffed out his chest, suddenly feeling protective of his position as the youngest and most talented amongst the agency. This was the beginning of rivalry, whether Agent 666 knew it or not, and Seven wasn’t about to relinquish his title to some mysterious girl.

“No,” Seven declared through gritted teeth. “Not at all.”

[marshmallowprotection]

Atp I’m just gonna be the angst anon,,

how do you think all versions of Saeran + Saeyoung will react to their feelings being unreciprocated

But I’m not talking about some little crush, i mean DOWN BAD-I’d let the world burn for you kinda feelings

Pls write the most heartbreaking shit ever,,, your characterization is so accurate 🙏🙏

Ray already has a canon depiction of what that looks like and I don't think I need to go into detail on what happens on V Route.

Suit Saeran would have no choice but to accept it. He's not going to spiral because he already assumed from the start you wouldn't like him because you kind to Ray and he's not right. He never expected you to like him so even if he likes you, it's one of those things where he didn't even bother to get his hopes up because what would be the point in getting his hopes up when there's no real reason to have any hope in a cult?

He still is going to do everything he can to get you out of that place, but he never expected to be loved. That's something that only Ray could have. Why bother getting his hopes up? There's no reason to hope for anything more than what he's already been given and that is how he sees it.

GE Saeran already came two terms with the fact that you may not ever want to see him again after his apology and promise to get you out of Mint Eye. He steeled himself to do the right thing, and to do the right thing, he had to be willing to let you go.

He had to truly respect your autonomy and take it with grace if you decided to leave. So, it might hurt, it'll hurt quite a bit if we're being honest, but all he wants at the end of the day is for you to be happy and if that's not with him, that's okay. It's a part of his acceptance process and he will take the time to take care of his emotions, but you won't have to worry about that because he's not going to put that on your plate. It's something he needs to work on.

Unknown is... well. He's apathetic to the world and if we got by what he feels canonically, you're just his eyes. He's using you to help him get the revenge he wants on his brother and Jihyun. There's a reason why he doesn't have a route, and it's because to have that with him, it would take a long time, longer than the speed-run we're given with 11 days that already cut down what would realistically be months. Even if he had feelings for you, even if he wanted to chase after you...

He's not an idiot. He knows you would choose the RFA even if he told all about the lies and deceit. Doesn't mean he wouldn't try to get you to believe him, but if you don't like him, so what? It's not he expected or wanted a happily ever after. His plan has always been revenge and then... nothing. End game. He can't see past that, and you not liking him would sting, but he's been rejected so much that he lives within numb apathy as it is.

SE Saeran, similarly to Suit Saeran, would never bother to get his hopes up. He has spent so much of his life living in a world of apathy that he doesn't try to dream of anything larger than what he already has. If the only good things he can have are ice cream and the sky, that's fine. That's more than he ever thought he would have.

It might crush his heart if you became the one person he could confide in more than anything, but why would you want somebody as broken as him romantically? He will shrug it off and deal with it just because the world beat him up so much that he's come to expect that things will always work out in his favor. It's good as long as you're happy, though. You've been a good friend.

Saeyoung would be crushed if he poured his heart out only for it to be stomped on. But, what can you do? As long as you're happy, that's all he could ever ask for. He told himself from the get-go that loving you would be impossible because of his circumstance, and if that's proven to be true, he's okay with that. He prepared himself for that pain a long time ago, and even though he won't be ready to face that pain, just know that he'll be okay in the end. You don't have to love him the way he loves you for him to be happy.

Just being able to call you his friend means the world to him. Thank you for being his friend, he'll say, but he will need some time to think and process his emotions in a healthy way... and by that, I mean he'll likely take a drive as far away as he can get for a few times until he's able to cry and let out those emotions in a safe, constructive way.

[password-door-lock]

Birthday Gift

Unknown x Reader and Saeyoung x Reader; angst set after Saeyoung's BSE 1; 4k words Rating: mature Content warnings: manipulation, kidnapping, referenced abuse, possessive behavior, power dynamics

He’s not stupid. He knows that this image was intended to hurt him, to mock him, to ruin his birthday— as if it wasn’t already ruined by the knowledge that his little brother was kidnapped and brainwashed by a cult which happened to be run by one of the two people in whom Saeyoung chose to invest his trust. As if it wasn’t already ruined by the fact that his friends— not his friends, the members of the RFA; they were never his friends; they never even knew his real name— have been forced into a 24/7 limbo game of press conferences and public schedules, a never-ending publicity stunt to call attention to the disappearance of one of their members. As if it wasn’t already ruined by the fact that you were ripped away from him, violently and brutally, by someone who boasted a willingness to hurt you if it meant harming Saeyoung. As if it wasn’t already ruined by every decision that Saeyoung has made in his entire worthless life. Maybe he doesn’t even deserve to have a birthday in the first place— he wonders, and not for the first time, if things would all have been better if he were never born.

Or:

Unknown sends his brother a little birthday gift.

Read it on Ao3!

[asterjennifer]

“Can you draw a cloud next to the spaceship for me, Saeyoung?” Saeran asked mumbled tender as his older brother measured him.

Saeyoung found the tone of voice fitting for the face he's able to look at in peace for once. No tears to be found in these round eyes, neither fear nor sadness. It's not often his little twin stared up in awe.

He hummed then, nodding his head at the small request. “Sure! I can do that.”

The other squeezed his wrist in excitement. They've been able to spend most of the day together since their mother had to leave for an reason unknown. She didn't elaborate on anything, simply told them to stay put if they wanted to see the next day coming.

But like Saeyoung has always been in the soul, he took the opportunity for his brother and himself to get up and do all kinds of things they've only been talking about before. Like eating ice cream outside. Or going for a short, hidden walk around the house. Especially for Saeran was it nice.

His legs hurt at first due to the aching in his bones, that's when you're not used to walking his big brother explained. Taking his fear of stepping forward when holding onto his arm tightly for support. Soon afterwards they managed a round around the house.

The pride in Saeran's eyes in that moment after reaching the door again had been undeniable and ever so gentle. Saeyoung read another book to him as well considering they didn't find the right timing for it since it's an adventure book.

Saeyoung had promised to read it right; implying they needed the freedom to play with the action it contained. Luckily today's the perfect situation to finally open these pages together and read through them. Saeran often giggled and made big eyes whenever Saeyoung empathized sounds or actions with his hands. Like the gunshots.

“Bam! Bam!” His fingers formed a pistol, shooting into the air with an eye pinched close to aim. “They shot like that, grazing the enemy so very skillfully.”

Saeran titled his head at the display in front of him. “Do you like guns? They are scary, don't you think?” He asked obvious.

“Hm… well, they are bad. That's true.” Saeoyung had concluded, sitting back down next to his twin at the ground.

He looked at Saeran for a short while, who waited for an answer. The innocence written all over his features despite the hardships of the days they spend in that hellhole. The pain and suffering never changed his soft heart, Saeyoung thought. Feeling his own heart melt in love albeit regret.

Saeran flinched out of reflex as Saeyoung reached out to stroke over his hair. “It's just to make it exciting, nobody gets hurt I promise.”

The day flew by outside the window and by the time they sat outside for some sky gazing. Sunrays shining down at the rather uncolored earth around them, yet giving it the perfect color to have it appear all warm. They sat beside each other and enjoyed the sun to the fullest, not really talking that much anymore.

They didn't need to; both figured individually. It's the feeling that counted, just like the fact of calmness they're capable of claiming for themselves. The house's often hectical in the most negative ways, not that they could face it very much. They're forced to regardless. Letting these days become so much more brighter in comparison.

An idea popped into Saeyoung's head, then. Anticipating the willingness of his little brother to write their heights at the wall. Sometimes, when their mother wasn't in the condition to catch them doing their own thing, they would do the small actions that brought them immense joy.

Like measuring their heights and see how they've grown over the last time they marked down the results. It's a reminder they both treasured – telling each other they survive and get to become bigger and bigger until the day they finally could escape the house they're trapped in. Living together for the rest of all days.

A dream shared within their hearts since the moment they could think, it's something that connected them. This kind of strength outshone the hatred of their parents; they lived on because they got a goal to reach once the heights were enough.

“You look taller to me now…” Saeran's words caught Saeyoung's attention right away. Looking down at him, he saw the same expression from before.

However, it still felt slightly different. “Do I?” He asked as he raised an eyebrow. The twin continued rubbing his wrist.

Then he shifted his stare to the window. “You always have been taller, but I sometimes forget that you're a lot taller than me.”

The one wearing the black tank tops frowned by these words, unsure what to make of them. He took the pen off the paper as he closed it. “But you have grown a lot, too. Look!”

He pointed the end of the pen to the new line. Saeran took a step away in order to gaze at it before blushing lightly. His lips parted and yet no sound came out of him. For a moment silence dominated the air between the two.

Thus Saeyoung placed his hand to his shoulder. “I think you have a good height, you're not too tall and not too short.”

Both could tell Saeran didn't quite believe the statement. On the contrary, he shook his head almost unnoticeable. “I don't know…”

The sad hint inside that doubt left Saeyoung to swallow a bitter taste. What could he say to make it better? To assure Saeran it's not about how tall or physical strong someone was? That his warm hands and heart were the true definition of strength?

Saeran sighed, closing his eyes while trying to gather himself. He didn't mean to ruin the nice moment. Never was it his intention to make things worse, somehow his emotions always ended up doing the opposite though. No matter how much he struggled to repress them, they're always on his sleeve. Therefore he rubbed his eyes.

“I'm sorry…” The high voice husked. “I mean… I'm glad I grew. And I feel good to have a taller brother, too. It's just…”

His words cut off in the back of his throat, taking in the difference on the wall. It's true and he meant it when saying he's happy that Saeyoung was the taller one of the two. It felt more like safety that way, giving him a place to hide away behind without being seen by the dark things.

On the other hand it's leaving an itchy feeling to his skin. Being the smaller one, the weaker of two made him the easier target for misery. Their mother came a lot more at him because of that. Of course he didn't desire for Saeyoung to be in trouble instead, that's never the case. It's more about the weakness that's glued to his bones ever since he's been born.

He both admired yet worried about Saeyoung always being the stronger one. How should he protect him in return? Could he ever repay him in some way for standing up for him as well? He's uncertain about it.

Saeyoung put the pen aside, the noise bringing Saeran out of his circling thoughts. “We are twins, aren't we?” He said with the familiar confidence.

Saeran stiffed slightly when his brother rested both hands on his shoulders, giving him eyes between certainty and care. “You are me and I am you. We are the other and that doesn't get defined by our height.”

“Are you sure…?” He couldn't help the question, but Saeyoung didn't seem to be mad at it. He just smiled.

“Of course! We share the same strength in here.” He poked the chest of his brother, right there were his heart was beating underneath. Saeran blinked frequently for a few times and relaxed again.

It felt good, knowing he's not beyond saving. That there's a chance for them both when hearing a verbal confirmation that his depressing thoughts weren't the reality of their future and even their present. Saeran reached out without another word, putting both arms around his older brother.

Saeyoung's air left his lunges at first by the sudden pressure, quickly he returned the hug anyway. They stood there, unsure how much time passed while holding onto each other. Neither of them cared as it's been something that calmed both their souls.

“Before mom comes back,” Saeoyung said after letting go. “Do you want to eat cake? I got some earlier from the woman at the church.”

These amber colored eyes glittered with the mentioning of something sweet to eat, Saeyoung was aware how much Saeran loved food that pleased his sweet tooth. The young boy made two fists with his hands, nodding his head hard. “Really? Yeah! I'd love to eat it with you!”

“Then let's get to it now, I'm sure it's going to be even tastier when we eat it together.”

Happy early birthday, Choi Twins 💕

[natasha-in-space]

Cruel Miracle

Saeyoung/gn!reader;

'Be careful what you wish for' is a saying Saeyoung never thought much about, not before meeting you. Perhaps, that is because he never wished for anything but Saeran's happiness. Is he allowed to dream of more? Unfortunately, the universe has already decided that for him. (Canon school ver. Saeyoung/reader thingy I wrote, done from his own perspective!)

If Saeyoung was asked to point out the one thing that he first took notice of about you, it would be your eyes. Regardless of the way you may have behaved in front of those happily bustling about around you, regardless of the countless masks you've carefully put on and off day after day, your eyes perceived the world with nothing but gracefulness and gentle warmth swirling deep within your thoughtful gaze. A gaze that has pulled him into you from the very moment you looked up at him from your desk for the very first time. And he noticed it all as he stood there, being forced to make a painfully awkward introduction to the group of complete strangers by the sickeningly cheery professor pushing him onward, despite his numerous grumblings and protests.

It was stupid, naive, downright childish even. Something that just could not happen to someone like him in the reality his life had become from the moment he decided to part ways with Saeran. And yet... His stubborn heart refused to listen to the cold reason his mind has meticulously established to keep his fragile soul intact. And, only to add more fuel to the fire that was leading up to an inevitable disaster, he could feel you staring at him constantly.  

He hated how amusing he found it to catch you eyeing him and watching, as you would quickly turn your burning face away from him, pretending like it was nothing more than a mere coincidence on your part. Well, unbeknownst to you, you were a really bad liar. But... All about this was wrong from the very beginning. And try as he might, this heavy cloud of fear and paranoia would drift over him just as quickly as the first tiny rays of sunshine would sneak through the dense shadows enveloping all that his eyes could see.

This is not how life works for someone like him.

He cannot allow himself to form any close connections and thus put not only himself but the people he grows attached to in the process at mortal risk. He cannot allow himself to leave even a single noticeable trace to remember him by. He cannot allow himself... to simply exist in this daily life filled with nothing but small mundane troubles as normal people do. Because he is not normal, and he could never dream of having even a semblance of a normal life, to begin with.

He is a mere shadow, and that's all he can ever be. Dreaming of something more than that will only torment him. Truth is, you were from two completely different worlds. One made of nothing but cold and darkness, and one filled with warmth from the gentle light shining down from above. And he could not allow his ugly, ruthless world to taint yours bright and hopeful one. No, instead, he will push these stupid feelings of his as far away as humanely possible, shove them into the deepest corners of his mind, and simply watch you from afar for as long as he's allowed to do that. That much, he can live with.

At least, that is what he had initially planned on doing.

"I know you found it hard to adjust here Chilyoung... But I have the utmost confidence in your abilities and Y/N's open-mindedness to create a winning team between the two of you. I picked them out of everybody to be your partner for a good reason, you know." He could only bite onto his lower lip as the professor spoke, refusing to listen to any of his requests to just let him work on this godforsaken project by himself. The pen he was clutching in his hand was starting to tap rapidly at the surface of the desk, picking up the pace the longer he sat there.

"I don't need to participate in any team-building activities."

"Even if you are staying with us for only one year in an advanced program, that doesn't mean you have to isolate yourself from everyone." She didn't even look up at him from her stack of papers, only making him feel more irritated with her persistence to keep pushing through his demands to pull him out of this. This woman was too stubborn for her own good. "You are a very smart and capable boy. But, you can't achieve much by being a lone wolf all of your life. You need to put yourself out there and find a support system that is going to bring you up when you fall down. I simply believe that you and Y/N can become good friends if you just give them a chance."

"Shouldn't I have the freedom to decide that for myself, Ms. Brown?" He said through gritted teeth, fighting the urge to just get up and leave right then and there. "Just because I didn't make friends with anyone here, doesn't mean I don't have them outside of my studies."

It felt bitter, saying all of these empty statements as if anything he came up with on a whim was really true. Not only did he lack any friends or close acquaintances, but he also lacked the freedom to decide anything for himself. So, really, he was saying the complete opposite of the truth here.

How foul.

"Well, then I will be very happy for you." She smiled, finally raising her gaze to take a good look at him. Though, much to his disappointment, he saw no signs of her giving up any time soon. "But, this is still a group project by default. I already made an exception for you by allowing you to work in a pair rather than in a group. I won't allow you to work alone on this assignment."

Not much he could say or do to change these unfortunate circumstances. All he could do was do what he always did best.

Accept and adjust.

~~~

Saeyoung rested his chin on the palm of his hand as he watched you type, your eyes squinting adorably, all of your attention focused solely on the task at hand. A part of him felt guilty, seeing how hard you were trying to make this work despite his stubborn attempts to shut you out. No matter how distant or abrasive he became, you never got angry with him, never gave up, never left. God only knows why... Someone like you deserved so much better than this.

Still, you just kept on smiling at him, offering him snacks, asking about his interests, and trying to help him in whatever way you possibly could. He already told you that there was no real need for you to work on this project together. He could do it all alone, and you would never have to worry about getting a bad grade. Much to his disappointment, though, you adamantly refused to accept this convenient deal of his, insisting on working together and sharing your workload fairly between yourselves.

Just what were you thinking in that odd head of yours?

In truth, he was finished with his half of today's assignment about an hour ago. If he was to be thinking rationally, he should have left long ago by now, leaving you to finish up by yourself. Instead, however, he found himself simply observing you without saying a single word, his eyes carefully reading into every little move you made. Why were you so eager to work on this meaningless project with someone like him? It's not like it's so important for you to put all your blood sweat and tears into it. Some really stupid part of him hoped longingly, that it was because of him. Really, it was obvious to see that you were interested in him, be it as a mere friend or something more. He simply pretended like he didn't have a clue about your feelings.

What stung most of all, was the fact that his refusal to acknowledge it was as closest as he could ever get to accepting your affections. This was already much more than he could possibly allow. If he did confront you about it... It would be the end of your relationship altogether. He would have to leave and never turn back, for both of your sakes.

And, even if he'll have to do it eventually at the end of his program... He wanted to make the most of the little time he did have.

It was a bittersweet feeling at heart. Saeyoung could sense his thoughts wandering, those urges he usually ignored with relative success coming up on the front of his mind once again. He wanted to know how it would feel like to touch you. To put his hand on yours and watch your cheeks flush, just like they always did whenever he caught you staring at him. He wanted to make you smile and laugh until your eyes would start to water like your classmates had the privilege to do so. He wanted to know what makes you laugh the hardest and know that he's the one bringing you so much joy.

He wanted... to get closer to you. To know you. To be truthful with you. To open up to you.

But, such a miracle could never be brought into the cruel reality he lived in. No matter how innocent in nature his daydreams really were. The only way Saeyoung Choi could show his love for someone like you was by letting you go without hurting you. Without making you feel attached to him in any way.

So, then, why did his heart ache so much at the prospect of parting his ways with you...?

~~~

"-You're the one I like. That's... That's what I really wanted to talk to you about... I know you don't get along with anybody here, but I want to know more about you. And... I want you to know how much I care about you."

Oh, but the reality was always much crueler than he could ever imagine. It all felt like one big joke to him. He thought he had prepared himself for everything coming his way. He thought he was ready to let you go when the time came. He thought... He thought he could enjoy the time he did have with you without worrying about anything, for once in his life.

Was such a desire too selfish for him? Is this why the universe itself has decided to remind him of his proper place?

It... hurt. It hurt like hell.

Saeyoung has always felt grateful for every opportunity coming his way. He never took anything for granted and never regretted those decisions he knew in his heart were right. But, right now, in this very moment, as he heard you say those same words his naive heart longed for so firmly, he cursed this miracle with every fiber of his being.

For the very first time, he cursed his decision to throw his own right to exist in this world away. And, that realization hurt him almost just as much. Since, right after his initial burst of anger, came a crushing sense of shame, suffocating him from the inside. Shame for giving in to his personal desires and making you care for him so much. Shame for daring to look back on his decision to keep Saeran safe. Shame for being such a selfish human being to everyone he held dear in his heart.

It felt like his soul was being torn into pieces.

"You- No. No, you can't. This is... No."

He sounded angry, terrified, frustrated, heartbroken. Gone was the cold composure he has successfully kept up in front of everybody up to this day. Saeyoung could see the confusion, the hurt in your eyes, as you blinked at him at a complete loss for words. But, what hurt him most of all, was the genuine concern that was written so clearly on your gentle features. You still worried for him, and still reached out to him, just like you always did.

And, he had no choice but to throw it all away.

So, he ran. He ran from you, he ran from his own feelings and he ran from the cruel universe he had no choice but to oblige to.

[mys-me-stuff]

requests?

hi friends, i'm hella late to the party but i grew up on mystic messenger and fanfic, and recently rediscovered a love for both of these things. with that said, i'm also very unsure of where to start.

will not write: anything that is socially unacceptable, pls don't even make requests like that. that's a wide range of things, i'm aware. just be normal, i beg.

will write: angst, fluff, (bad) smut, anything else within the realm of normal people requests that someone smarter than myself may come up with.

[anon-drabble]

wake up

whoops, got bit by that inspiration bug again.

some good old seven angst because why not lol. similar to the reset theory but also inspired by a few other sources that talk about multiple universes.

ao3 | ko-fi | twitter | masterpost

When will she wake up?

Once more, Saeyoung reset the app. One more time. Surely, she’d remember. This time, she would. 

He’d been repeating that with every reset. Every time the data was erased, he said those words to himself. Every time, he wished. But so far, she remained unaware. Maybe someday she would remember everything and remember him. But maybe she wouldn’t. That didn’t matter, though. He’d promised her that he would never stop trying. And she promised that she would remember him. It had been so long ago now, he almost forgot how she looked that day. 

Everything had gone wrong. Mint Eye had won, Rika had finally managed to get her wish. For everyone to be happy. But it wasn’t real. It was all through her elixir and that wasn’t true happiness. 

Saeyoung was in the prison with you. You two were the only ones left of the RFA. Unknown (who you now knew was Saeran, Saeyoung’s long-lost twin) had taken great joy in prolonging the torture Saeyoung was made to endure. At first, V had been there and had tried to save you and the rest of the RFA. But he’d been too late. In an ironic twist of fate, he simply hadn’t seen the signs in time. He was dead now. You and Saeyoung had witnessed it, watched the blood pool as his body went limp, as it slowly turned ashen. The floor of your cell was still stained with V’s blood. Saeyoung was kept in a separate cell beside yours. His stone floor was also stained but it was mostly his own blood now. Among other things. But he hadn’t been broken yet. Neither had you. You wondered if perhaps Rika and Saeran were going easy on you for some reason. After all, you had watched as one by one, each of the RFA members were taken and they slowly lost their minds. Became just another of Rika’s drones. Some of them took longer than others but eventually, they had all succumbed. At first, everyone had worked together to come up with plans for escape. But as their minds cracked, it grew more and more difficult. Saeyoung now was the only one left except for you. 

“I think tonight’s the night,” he murmured. You imagined him in his cell, on the floor, hunched over in pain from Saeran’s most recent attack. You were unhurt but Saeyoung was nursing at least a few broken bones, more bruises and cuts than you could count. You had no idea how he was even still alive. Whenever you saw him being dragged out of his cell, he had dried blood everywhere, his hair matted in clumps from it. 

You pulled your knees up to your chest, wrapping your arms around them. “Did he say something?” 

“No. But I saw the room set up for another ‘recruit’. I think it’s your turn.” 

That meant you wouldn’t be coming back this time. They’d turn you, just as they had all the others. You knew it was coming. Rika spoke of you often, boasting about how she’d use you. She had already used you once, leading you to that apartment. That was when you had met the RFA. You had no idea at the time that it was her apartment. But it had all been a trap, meant to lure the RFA to Mint Eye, back to Rika’s embrace. 

“What should I do?” you whispered in the darkness. 

“There’s nothing you can do. Not this time,” Saeyoung replied. 

“‘This time’?” you echoed. 

“I think… I think I have an idea. It won’t stop anything in this world. I think it’s too late for us. But this might not be our only existence. I think I can save us next time.” You heard him shuffle over. His hand reached through his bars towards your cell. One of his fingernails had been ripped off. You clasped his hand as well as you could from your cell. 

“Then we don’t have to say goodbye.” You weren’t entirely sure if you believed in other universes but he was trying to give you hope. And probably to give himself hope as well. That was in short supply these days. 

“Right,” he said. You imagined him smiling a little. You squeezed his hand and heard him wince but he squeezed yours in return, reassuring you. “This time… I couldn’t save you. But I won’t fail you ever again.” 

“You didn’t fail me,” you started to say, but he interrupted. 

“I found a way to save us. Not our physical bodies but ‘us’. Our psyche, personality, spirit, whatever you want to call it. I can save those so that next time…” 

“We can win?” 

“Right. We can stop this. We can…save everyone. And we can be together…” He trailed off. 

“How?” you asked. 

“They left me my phone. I think they meant it to hurt me more, to make me remember how I’d messed everything up. But I made something. A program. If there are other worlds out there, it can transfer us. And we can stop this.” He sounded almost excited now. Despite everything, you smiled. He was always happiest when he was working on something outrageous. Even now, at the end, he still had that side of wonder to him. 

“What do I do?” 

He hesitated. “Nothing. Once your mind here is gone, it will transfer to another you somewhere else.” 

“What about you?” You dreaded hearing his answer. 

“It will be the same. Once I’m…gone, I’ll transfer. I can save you then.” 

“There’s something you’re not telling me.” You could hear it in his voice. 

Again, he hesitated. “You might not…remember everything. I tried to save everything but there are some holes that I can’t fix.” 

“I won’t remember you? I don’t want that. I don’t want to forget you, Saeyoung!” you cried. 

“Try to remember. At the end. Just think of me, okay? It will help me bring more of you over. Just think about me.” 

You wiped a tear from your cheek. “I’ll remember you. I promise,” you said. 

“And I’ll bring you back. All of you. And we’ll be safe.” 

“Together,” you said. 

“Together,” he answered. 

It wasn’t until later that night that some cultists came to collect you. You were dragged from your cell. Saeyoung was at his bars, watching you. You could see him crying. You were crying, too. “I promise. I’ll remember,” you said again as you were ushered from the prison. You thought of him as they poured the elixir down your throat. You remembered his laugh. His cosplay. His self-hatred. You thought of how much you loved him. Even as the elixir was forced into your mouth, dribbling out the corners, you thought of Saeyoung. You thought of the times you’d had with him, short though they had been. You thought of his voice. His hand. His hair. His glasses. You thought about him. You thought…

The familiar screen and code flashed on his screen. Sometimes, it felt like she did remember. She said all the right things, she didn’t fall victim to Mint Eye’s traps. Sometimes she still loved him. But it wasn’t all of her. She never remembered their other lives. He almost didn’t want her to. He didn’t want her to know how he had been unable to save her, how he had been forced to watch her be carried away. At least she would never know what she had been made to do to him afterwards. That would remain locked in his own mind. But wouldn’t it be better for her if she didn’t wake up? If she didn’t have to experience those days again, even as a distant memory? But he had promised her. 

And she had promised him. And someday, that life she had promised was waiting for them. Where they would be safe and together. Even as the reset code scrolled by, he longed for that day more than anything. He wasn’t exactly the same him that he had been. This Saeyoung had never been tortured by his brother, not really. But the memories were as strong as though they had happened. He wasn’t the same him and she hadn’t yet been the same her but once she woke up, then they could be. They would be themselves again fully. 

Because Saeyoung could never truly be himself when he didn’t love you.

[enuniu]

plane of memories and golden coins

The chime of a golden coin being collected rang around the small room, it sounds reverberating off the skin of Yoosung and causing a slight shiver of excitement now that he has finally completed such a complicated level. 

His hands gripped the bright red controller in his sweaty palms, the shine gliding beside the handles and causing his ability to control just a bit harder than when he had started. His taped fingers— wrapped in colorful bandages from the countless times he tried cooking from a recipe he had found in one of Rika’s old books —pushed lightly against the small buttons as he maneuvered the pointer to enter a new realm of trees and morbid creatures on the small screen. 

Soft snores echoed against Yoosung’s back, reminding him he had to be extra quiet to let the being behind finally have the pleasure of sweet dreams or a blank slate in their mind as darkness welcomed drowsiness.

Shades of blue and purple and black painted the room beautifully; the only source of light to swirl the colors together was a small television placed on a hardwood floor, without a table to lay on. It flashes of the many different scenes happening on it— courtesy to Yoosung’s fiddling with a joystick —bouncing across the features of the blond and the redhead on the couch. 

If the young boy risked his thirteen lives he worked hard to collect for his red character to hold a clammy hand on such a rough one, experienced one: traces of hard work and tiny, white scars littered across its pale dimension, he would deny the statement. 

Because the feeling of clasping such a boy who tremors in the presence of a religious figure, who tinkers with nails and washers and gift those exact projects to his humble friends; who whispers softly in the shell of your ear— hot breath fanning your neck, sending shivers down to your spine as sweet encouragement of words and praises and love shatter your composure to hear any more of it — it’s all too much and too little and maybe the curious younger boy wanted a taste of it. 

For some time, Yoosung assumed he and Saeyoung were from the same star, the same orbit. Their values were similar in ways which when they shared the same room, it’s almost as if they collided and meshed so well together there was no need for such an imperfect balance. Instead, it was replaced with fits of giggles and boyish teases; pranks that could’ve been taken too far but the blond can’t help and hold a grudge for so long, so Saeyoung knew he always had one more chance left.

It was the way a small smile of slightly crooked teeth that dared to look his way had Yoosung’s grip hold on tighter to the collared shirt he wore too often. It was the way the redhead traced the curves of his young face, complimenting the strange color washed in his eyes and joking about how he possibly got the physical trait from a faraway being— nothing human but all the more the same emotion Yoosung held in his own. 

Saeyoung stopped pushing when Yoosung decided he had enough and pulled such a fragile boy against his chest and rubbed a shaking hand across the surface of his back. No matter how many throws and curses the other tossed his way, Yoosung took it with a grain of salt and hoped it wasn’t all true. He hoped the fumbling sentences that were wretched from his scratchy throat, were all just mere lies and thoughts the redhead had conjured up for the sake of the people closest to move; to leave and never come back because there was only one person who deserved such a far away concept of happiness.

Saeran didn’t ask for it, but Saeyoung gave and gave and—

Here he was. Stretched limbs displayed along the frayed gray couch of Yoosung’s dorm room. Strands of fiery red— (sometimes Yoosung argued with himself that it could’ve been the soft color of orange, shades of autumn and pumpkins and the sweet smell of annual treats he passed by every morning on the way to class, bright or the dark shade of) —hair framed such a peaceful face that the other hadn’t witnessed in a long time. 

There was a bowl of popcorn discarded on the flat of his stomach, almost similar to an elevator the way it descended every time a breath Saeyoung took as he brought it back down. 

He still held his hand. He no longer paid attention to the game in front and instead twisted his body around fully to enrapture such a wonderful sight to see. Yoosung brought his body closer, seeking warm, heat Saeyoung always seemed to radiate off and had the smaller one of the two melt at any slight touch. 

He played with their fingers, tangled up lazily as Saeyoung's grip was pliant and loose, not necessarily hanging on but still curling around the wrist of Yoosung’s. The soft colors that emitted from the television screens painted a nice shade along the sleeping features of the other, eyelashes cascaded low as it shadows underneath his closed eyes. 

Yoosung brought his free hand from the floor to lightly press his palm against the warm cheek of Saeyoung. His nimble fingers carefully rubbing circles on the soft skin, too scared to wake up the being beside him.

It didn’t do much though. In a matter of seconds— of moments where it was just Yoosung brushing away silent tears and coaxing horrible memories and heartbreaking betrayals to leave this desperate boy alone— Saeyoung’s amber orbs flickered open, a hazy smile matching the sleep clinging onto the corners of his eyes.

Yoosung smiled softly, thrumming the pads of his fingers more firmly against Saeyoung; an apology for waking up the other from such a comfortable slumber.

Seayoung’s tried gaze traveled the expanse of Yoosung’s own, soon noticing the bright colors across the room— snorting at the character his blond left idling, getting eaten by a black wrecking ball with chompers for teeth. 

A small laugh came with his playful look as he turned his head back to the boy in front, lifting the hand dangling, tingling with the overflow of blood and covering the same hand Yoosung still declared his property for the time being. 

“You missed a gold coin,” he teased.

The younger boy whipped his head back to the screen, eyeing the black space circled with white, no golden shining coin filling it in. 

His ears perked at another sound of laughter, this time much more awake and alive and everything Yoosung wanted to hear for the rest of his life. Though, he wasn’t going to announce that aloud and have Saeyoung get the upper hand in their little game of cat and mouse. He was quite tired of being the only one to fall for mindless jokes, regardless of whether the small white lies were obnoxious or not— Saeyoung was quite convincing when he put his mind to it: which happened to be the majority of the time. 

“You’re never going to let that down, huh?” Yoosung responded, a hint of annoyance but still too soft. Damn— he sometimes envied Jumin for keeping obvious emotions in check; Yoosung just didn’t have that power too often.

Saeyoung’s eyes crinkled at the outer corners of Yoosung’s tone. The dim light capturing the mix of brown and hazel— maybe orange, (just another thing to add to his list of Saeyoung) —as he breathed, “You’re stuck with me young one.”

Yoosung’s nose scrunched at the teasing nickname but overall gave up on starting a round of comebacks till one of them lost to fits of laughter or a bright pink shade of embarrassment.

Neither said anymore. Too lost in losing themselves in a small bubble they created with a comfortable silence and unspoken words. 

Yoosung can’t help but remember when there were times they couldn’t even share the same space. He recalls meeting up in public places; the arcade, movies, events held during RFA parties, but never at each other’s personal home— more specifically a certain stubborn redhead’s. He remembered the muscle memory he had every time Saeyoung— (or Seven at the time when none of their close-knit of friends were aware of anything more than a jokester with a skill for codes and binary numbers) —would send a ridiculous image of himself with a trail of expensive cars lined behind him and Yoosung would send a collection of annoyed emojis in response. The pictures usually held a signature peace sign formed on slender figures and glasses lowered down to the point where if Yoosung was with him at that moment, he would gladly push them back up to the bridge of his nose. 

For some time, he believed those romantic eyes of his were too focused on the newest member of their charity. Always going on about how they would protect them at any cost, never mind his own well being. 

Maybe, if Yoosung wasn’t so naive or childish, if maybe he looked a bit more closely back then, he could’ve seen the signs of an upcoming breakdown of tears and guilt of a lost brother.

No matter how many times he shook his head at the memories, pleading for them to go away because Saeyoung was with him right now. Saeyoung is no longer tied to mysterious people he once worked with who punished him with girl clothing and exhausting missions. He is no longer brought back down by the same blond woman and her loving companion whose eyes barely saw through the fog of danger. He was home and he was safe and Yoosung would be damned if they had a repeat of what happened so long ago.

“Hey,”

Yoosung wasn’t aware he blanked out. He suddenly felt the weight of warmth on his own cheek, accompanied by no other than the exact person he was thinking about. 

The blond rested his eyes back into Saeyoung’s, filled with adoration and care; everything the other didn’t have the privilege of when he was younger. 

He wanted to forget all that though. No more sad smiles and late-night cries as the moon shed her lovely light through cheap blue curtains. Saeyoung was okay. He is okay. 

And he’s right here with Yoosung, smiling just as softly.

“Hi.”

“You’re still here with me?” Leave it to Saeyoung to continue joking around even if this was a moment neither wanted to break.

Yoosung didn’t mind. He would listen to these kinds of conversations for the rest of his life he hoped.

He took hold of the hand cupping his cheek, a dark blush already forming because no matter how many times they’ve done this routine before, he would always be shy to experience such comforting affection from the redhead. He brought the exact hand to the wide expanse of his lips, pressing them lightly against the palm of it and then peppering more around calloused fingers. 

A giggle escaped Saeyoung’s mouth, no longer containing the exact same embarrassment he constantly harassed on the other.

Yoosung sighed, leaning forward and knocking his forehead against Saeyoung’s. They stared and stared and shared silent whispers of promises neither dared to say aloud.

“Yeah, I’ll always stay here.”

Amethyst eyes met hazel ones and—

“Always. With you."

[onlinekitsune]

LET ME IN: SAEYOUNG CHOI

"struggling, but even if you sink, it's fine"

PAIRING, GENRE, WARNINGS ─ saeyoung choi x gnc!reader, so much angst, so much emotional pain and torment?, no warnings really but there's a part he snaps at you if that's something, not proofread

SYNOPSIS ─ after seven leaves the chat, you're reminded that this isn't some sort of dramatic drama. everything you've been told the past few days instantly started falling apart in a matter of a day. the person, you had fallen for, had fell apart in a matter of a day. all you wanted was to see him shine again.

WRITER’S NOTE ─ hi beloveds... i am once again posting after disappearing again. whoops! but to be honest, my interests have succumed to kpop and less of otome games... but exo's new single inspired me to write this soooo... this is inspired by day 6?? of seven's route, i'm not sure?? some of the dialogue was directly taken by it as well btw i will write a comfort side to this, but i'm nervous of not having enough room so... it'll be up eventually. as always thank you for reading, ily!!

all dividers by cafekitsune

The apartment was silent, for the most part. Except the various clicks of the keyboard from Seven. You looked down at your phone. It was still displaying the previous conversation, it was hard to process that you were even part of it. All the things you’ve been told over the past few days felt so very complicated now. The party. V. This hacker. It was all feeling so muddled with each passing second. Your eyes floated towards the window. The evidence of it being smashed in was long gone. It was like it never even happened. But the hacker’s voice and the feeling of his arms around your body still lingered. You were just lucky that Seven arrived at such a convenient moment. A sigh escaped his lips, hovering over the air. You couldn’t begin to imagine how he felt. You didn’t know how you’d even feel knowing that the hacker you were chasing turned out to be your own brother. Your heart ached seeing him so distressed, it was the very opposite of the Seven you knew in the chatroom. 

“God Seven, God Seven! I sense that you are depressed, meow! I automatically turn on when I sense that you are depressed, meow!” A robotic voice called out. “The source of God Seven’s depression is bad service, meow! I analyzed, meow!” A robotic white cat carefully stepped its way towards him. It stopped right in front and even turned its head slightly as if it was waiting for something. Seven’s eyes peered from above his laptop. 

“Please.” he began to mutter. “Just be quiet.” He turned his attention back to his screen and instantly picked up his typing. His fingers hit the keyboard a little rougher, trying to fall back in his almost tranced state.

“Cheer up, meow! Meowy doesn’t lose service, meow!”

“I said to shut it.” he snapped, furrowing at the small cat robot. “How did I turn you off before?” Seven carelessly picked it up, quickly scanning over it.

“Meowy needs to hear Seven meow!” The robot replied in a pur. You nervously bit the bottom of your lip. You noticed the look of desperation and frustration only doubled with each passing second. 

“Oh, that robot… you made it.” You let out, in hopes of de-escalating the situation. Seven took a quick glance up at you. He made sure his gaze didn’t linger for too long but enough to acknowledge you. Another sigh fell from him. He sat the robot down in front of him.

“Doesn’t matter.” He replied. His voice was sharp and restrained from much emotion. Your heart sank into your chest, hearing how cold he could come across. “Meowy, go away. I don’t want to talk to you.”

“I can’t leave until I sense your depression is gone, meow!” It cheered back innocently. Seven’s scowl instantly appeared on his face. He stared bullets into the robot. It was only a matter of minutes until Seven would completely lose his temper and take it out on it. You couldn’t let him destroy one of his creations, especially one that seemed so intricate. 

“Hey… Meowy. Let’s just stay quiet for now, okay?” You whispered, giving a weak smile. It luckily obeyed your request without hesitation. The robot waddled back into the place it originally was at.  A small sigh of relief fell through. You were glad you could get at least one thing in control for him. Seven muttered in response, going back to his laptop. You let the sound of the keyboard fill the air for a bit. You managed the courage to scoot closer towards Seven, who paid no attention. You slightly leaned over the edge of the bed. “Hey, Seven? Things didn’t go so great… with V. Are you okay?”

He looked up from what he was doing, scratching the edge of his temple. “Don’t worry about me.” He paused, seemingly going over his words in his head. “Just… don’t trust V, okay? I know I told you that you could but… you can’t.” Another silence filled the room, with a quick sound of keys pressing. Seven leaned back from his laptop and crossed his arms. "I don’t even think you should be involved with the RFA anymore. I’m sure V only logged in because Jumin told him I was here… He’s obviously worried about me being here. The alarms would only set off if someone like you were to open the drawers. But I’m not… There’s obviously something here he’s hiding.”

You winced just a bit, noticing how hurt Seven was by all of this. It was hard to see someone who was seeming so bright and full of energy be so dull and damper. 

“Are you going to open them?” You posed, fidgeting with your sleeve. All these secrets swirled around in your head. They may have gotten the better of you. But, you couldn’t help but to be curious. You just wanted things to be figured out, to be normal again. The normal you quickly became accustomed to. You missed the silly night conversations with all the members, especially Seven. You would do whatever to see him happy again. 

“Maybe I will. I don’t know.” He responded. Seven closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. “It’s hard to keep myself contained, after my trust has completely shattered.” You went to move even closer to him, but he added more distance between you two. You paused in your place, furrowing your brows slightly. 

“Seven..” you sighed. “Is there really nothing I can do to help you?”

He shook his head, taking another deep sigh. “No, I shouldn’t worry you. I’ll figure out a way to take care of it.”

 “Seven-“

“Look, just forget about the RFA. Forget about the party. You’re only staying in danger by getting involved with all of this. Once I get this resolved… Please leave.” He urged, pulling his laptop closer towards him. The furrow on your face grew in intensity. Even imagining dropping everything you’ve done the past few days was enough to send your aches throughout your body. You had grown so close to everyone. For once, you even felt like you belonged somewhere.

“Why are you trying to decide this for me?” You called out. You understood he was worried for you. But, there was something that kept you wanting to stay. You wanted to see this to its end. You held onto your sweater sleeves tightly, trying to contain your composure. 

“I know more than you do. Especially when it comes to this. This isn’t for someone like you to be involved in. You’ll only end up hurt.” He replied. “Let’s stop talking about this. If you need to know anything I’ll just reply to you in the messenger. Don’t bother me.”

“Seven. You’re being so one-sided, what about-”

“Didn’t I just tell you not to bother me? I don’t care.” He snapped, darting at you. Your breath got stuck in your chest. You didn’t picture Seven ever snapping at you, or anyone really. “You’ve been living with a bomb this entire time, and all you’re worried about is nonchalant stuff… really? At a time like this? Don't you care you’re in danger because of this? What kind of person replies to a sketchy unknown number anyways… don’t you know anything?”

His words pierced through you, and all you could do was to stare straight down. He didn’t know. As much as he thought he knew you, he didn’t. Or perhaps he forgot. You weren’t sure what he was able to find on you. “A person who has nothing to lose… clearly.” you managed to reply. Your lips quivered with every syllable. You felt your throat burn as you held in your emotions. “Did all those times in the messenger… really mean nothing?” The barrier you’ve put up started to waver and crack.

“No. They didn’t. How can you worry about that now? I don’t understand you.”

You didn’t believe him. You couldn’t believe him. Though those messages were just silly messages in a chatroom, they meant something. And not just to you. Your grip tightened, feeling the tears finally stray from your eyes. You were annoyed that you couldn’t hold them back. “I know you’re worried about me Seven. So, please stop avoiding me…”

You went out to reach for him instinctively. He dodged your hand and swept up his laptop. Even if it wasn’t a good idea, you couldn’t help but to feel hurt. You stood a bit across from him, just staring. 

“Stop... after this is done, you’re not going to see me again. Don’t waste your emotions on someone like me.” he muttered. You couldn’t help but to look up at him. Your eyes easily glazed over seeing that he was completely avoiding you now. The moment felt like as if you two had been frozen in place. He took a second to pause, laptop in hand. Before taking a final glance at you before stepping past. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m going to work in the hallway, don’t bother coming after me. Sort your emotions.” He added and without a single word, the door closed. You turned to face it. Its barren face taunted you, knowing that he wouldn't be coming back in. You flung yourself back onto the bed, faltering back to the tears. Your body felt heavy as you let your emotions run through. Slowly but surely allowing them to guide you to sleep.

[simp-is-here]

More “Imagine This Fic While I Procrastinate Instead Of Writing”

If you end up using this ideas then please @ me, I really wanna know what you guys come up with

I’m going a bit different here, imagine a couple different anime scenarios

(Possible spoilers)

Obey Me: Lucifer x reader, mention of either Mammon, Solomon, or Diavolo x reader

Rejecting either Mammon, Solomon, or Diavolo for Lucifer, then after Lucifer loses his memories and doesn’t remember your relationship you’re talking to either Asmo, Simeon, or Barbatos about Lucifer forgetting everything and the person who once asked to stay by your side: and you have this conversation

Attack on Titan: person x reader, mention of Armin x reader

You’re lover died in the final battle, now that everything is starting to calm down a bit you’re talking to one of your friends (whoever you want), confiding in them about how you’re so lonely, and are hoping for another marriage proposal from your best friend Armin, not wanting to hear them say that it wouldn’t be fair to Armin if you settle

Mystic Messenger: character x reader, mention of either Yoosung, 707, or Zen x reader

After a bad breakup with whichever love interest you want, you’re talking with Jaehee about how (I imagine Yoosung, 707, or Zen) said they would love you forever, hoping so badly that they’d stay true to their word, even if you didn’t feel the same

Bungou Stray Dogs: past Dazai x reader, mention of Chuuya x reader

After Dazai left the Port Mafia you struggled with losing a valuable coworker, friend, and lover. While having a drink with Kouyou, you tell her that you’re hoping Chuuya will tell you once again that he loves you. And hopefully you won’t be alone anymore if he does

[anas-tasiaa]

Angelic.

Saeran felt the wind brushing his face as they walked hand in hand, and he closed his eyes, feeling the sensation. Saeyoung couldn't help but stop in his tracks and stare at Saeran. The wind blowing through his hair made him look so ethereal, almost otherworldly. The sunlight kissed his skin, highlighting his sharp features and making him look even more beautiful. Saeyoung couldn't believe that he was lucky enough to have Saeran by his side, to love and cherish him.

"Saeran," Saeyoung said softly, his eyes never leaving his twin's face.

"You're so beautiful, did you know that?"

Saeran blushed, his eyes widening in surprise. "Wh-what are you talking about, Saeyoung?" he stuttered as he's trying to hide his reddened face with his free hand.

"I'm serious, Saeran," Saeyoung replied, taking Saeran's hand in both of his, entwined their fingers.

"You're like an angel, walking among us mortals. I feel so lucky to be able to see you like this, to be with you every day."

Saeran's blush deepened, and he looked away, but Saeyoung could see a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Gosh you're such a cheesy goofball, Saeyoung," Saeran rolled his eyes, but his voice was gentle, filled with affection.

Saeyoung chuckled, bringing Saeran's hand up to his lips and pressing a kiss to the back of it. "I'm serious, Saeran," he said again. "You're the most beautiful person I've ever seen."

Saeran looked back at him, his eyes shining with emotion as his blush didn't wholly dissipated. "T-thanks.." he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "That means a lot to me."

Saeyoung smiled, feeling his heart swell with love for his twin. He knew that he would never be able to express how much Saeran meant to him, how grateful he was to have him in his life. All he could do was hold his hand and hope that Saeran could feel just a fraction of the love that he had for him.

"I love you."

[unwillingwriter]

☆5&1 (Jumciel)✮

Author: 707 tells Jumin he loves him unintentionally 5 times. Extra belongs to Jumin who means it. Seven means it too.

Warnings: Light Smut, Gun, Blood, Close to Death.

Paring: Jumin X Seven

Published Also On AO3

Fandom: MysticMessenger

A/N: Rusty As Heck with writing.

--

Jumin was pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation as he listened to Seven's laughter over the phone, keeping said device meters away from his ear– still being able to hear the redhead loud and clear. Jaehee- Assistant Kang had excused herself from the premises when Luciel called, mentioning she had something to do. Jumin should've known that she knew something by how fast she left the room when she saw Mr. Han's phone brightened with the Caller ID “707”.

When Jumin was sure that Seven was done with his overly loud laughter he pressed the phone against his ear once again ready to speak to the man who wouldn't stop laughing for the last 5 MINUTES!

It's a miracle that the redhead hadn’t passed out from all the air he let out, not once taking a second to catch his breath, seeming to be too engaged with tormenting the millionaire.

“Are you–”

“HAAAAAA!!! ACK!.” Luciel wheezed loudly, his breath hitting the speaker of the phone making the CEO cringe, his patients thinning.

“Luciel…” his voice lowered, his head beginning to pound. Ready to tell Seven to cease his laughter till a loud thud and crash was heard on the other side along with a clatter-- meaning Luciel had most likely dropped his phone in the process in whatever just happened.

Jumin opened his onyx eyes, finally, his brows narrowing with annoyance and a slight concern for the hacker.

“Luciel?.” Jumin could still hear the hacker laughing, sounding a bit further away and kinda muffled.

The CEO rubs his face, dropping his cheek into his hand.

‘I’m about to commit an offense…’

Jumin sighs as he listens to the hacker laugh, raising a brow when he hears another voice asking Seven why he was on the floor.

Another 5 minutes passed till Luciel FINALLY stopped laughing and seemed to pick up his phone small chuckles coming through his mic.

In those added 5 minutes Jumin managed to do some work on the cat project he was trying to push through trying to sway his father to the best of his ability. If the countless women in his life could do it then his son can as well.

“Okay, okay I'm back– hehe~” the hacker snickered into the phone. Jumin had put him on speaker so he could know when the hacker finally came back. Jumin places his pen down on the desk giving the other male his full attention.

“What happened?.”

“Oh I was laughing because –.”

“Not!, not that part yet. I'm asking what that sound was just now?.”

“Eh?.”

Jumin felt his eye twitch.

“Luciel…”

Seven chuckled.

“Okay okay. Jumin Han everyone, one of the rare people who can tell I'm lying– Anywho~~.”

Rare?.

“I leaned a little too far back in my computer chair and fell, bringing an old monitor of mine down with me. So you heard three things– wait no! Four things if you count my phone– which is sadly cracked– ack!-- I had just fixed the screen too three weeks ago from when Ms. Vanderwood threw it…”

Jumin could tell Seven wasn't talking to him when he reached a certain section of his sentence– he was mumbling to himself.

Why would his maid throw his phone?

“Agggh!!!- sorry that was off-topic please ignore whatever else I said. Please?. Hmm… Now where was I? Ah! Yes yes yes! Silly me~~ I did hit my head pretty hard… You heard my heavy ass hit the floor along with the chair– that's two– my ten-thousand-dollar-old monitor and my phone. Funny isn't it? Hehe~”

Jumin blinked twice before gathering his thoughts.

“Are you okay?.” he questioned.

Luciel let out a dramatic gasp.

“Awe JuJu~ are worried about little ol’ me?.” Luciel teased laughing to himself.

“Yes,” Jumin spoke bluntly, his voice never losing its natural stern.

The line was quiet. Too quiet that Jumin thought 707 hung up without him noticing somehow.

“Yes Jumin I'm fine thanks for the concern– eh?-- no, huh?-- ah! Okay Okay sheesh just give me a second – no! Jeez, just give me a second.” Luciel spoke at a fast pace, making the director more confused.

Who was he talking to? His maid maybe?

But why did he sound as if he was trying to buy–

“Sorry to cut this conversation short Jumin but–.”

“You were laughing for a long time.” he cut in but Seven kept talking.

“--I have to go, duty calls like always, of course, you would understand how that is– anyway bye Jumin I love you!!.” Seven said in his cheery voice before hanging up completely.

“Luciel–” and he was gone.

Jumin moved the phone close to him looking down at the screen. He didn't even get to ask him why he was laughing in the first place and why he called.

Jumin breathes out his nose. His mind swirls with thoughts till something comes to him.

Seven told him he loves him.

Maybe.

Maybe it could've been a slip-up.

Commoners who are friends tell each other they love them. Jumins not gonna think too deeply about it.

--

Jumin was rather annoyed, he finally understood why Seven had called him laughing a month ago. Today was Jumins birthday and his employees have decided to throw him a small birthday party— oh how he wishes it wasn’t…. Jumin stared down at the cake before him.

It was a red velvet cake— one of his favorite pastry’s out there. There was an image of him on it.

He was falling.

He remembers this day it was the day Seven had called him laughing four hours later after the incident happened.

But it wasn’t the fact that the picture is what annoyed him, it was the words on it. The Fonts were ones of a meme as Seven and Yoosung have explained to him countless times.

‘When your Crush is walking By and you can’t help but fall harder.’

It was such a wretched quote that it made him feel off.

He wanted to throw it away… But instead, he let everyone be and have a slice of cake.

After having a long day at work and finally giving assistant Kang a day off that she deserves. Jumin drops his butt on the couch in his penthouse. His phone rang in his pocket.

He just sat down…

Jumin bit back a frustrated sigh. Nothing good comes out of complaining.

The ravenette takes his phone out of his pocket looking at the ID.

‘707’

The CEO presses the phone against his ear after answering it.

“Hello?, Luciel?.”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! God, you're old!.”

That… Was unexpected but also– expected?.

“Don't remind me…” he mumbled, undoing his tie.

“Awww… Why so glum JuJu?.”

“I'm not dreary, I'm just tired,” he answered, a little too fast and defensive for his taste.

“Is it because I called you old? If so I was just teasing you I swear– you don't look a day over 25!.” the hacker cheered, Jumin could hear a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

“I already got called old by Yoosung, trust me you calling me old doesn't phase me either,” he says simply, taking off his blazer and setting it over the couch.

“Okay back to my first question then– why so dreary? as you put it in your fancy wording.”

“Luciel I'm not –.”

“You're a good businessman but suck at lying when it's not to another corporate face.”

Jumin stops moving around the room for a second. His hand fiddled with his watch as he had the phone tucked between his ear and shoulder.

Suck at lying?. He's not lying– at least he doesn't think he is…

Sure he keeps to himself and gives vague responses in the RFA chat to the members but it doesn't mean he's lying.

Jumin must have been too deep in his head since he came back to Seven’s voice ringing a little louder in his ears.

“Jumin? Oh Juju~ Jumi?, JumJum? Cat lover? Prince of the Han Family? H–.”

“I'm here!.” he responds feeling rather… Flustered? At the prince part.

He blames his ears for feeling red due to the heat of his phone.

“There's the birthday boy!.” Seven cheered, Jumin could imagine the smile of the redhead.

He rolled his eyes half-heartedly as he continued trying to get comfortable in his own home slowly stripping.

“Mmm…”

“Anywho back to our original convo~~ why is the great Jumin Han upset?.”

“Seven I'm not–.”

“It has something to do with your father, doesn't it?.”

Jumin shuts his mouth, setting his shoes in the closet.

His silence was his answer.

After a few seconds passed.

Luciel sighs on the other end.

“Of course, it does, when doesn't it? Let me guess he didn't take you out today to celebrate?.”

Jumin hated this.

“God, no disrespect to you or anything but your father is an asshole, Mr. Han.”

It's weird to hear Luciel call him that.

“Luciel, it's not a big deal, we're both grown men. It was a childish want.” Jumin had responded neutrally, at least he thought it was neutral…

To Seven it sounded defensive.

“It is natural for a parent's child to want to celebrate their birthday with them. It's not childish.”

Jumin remained silent as he dressed in his pajamas walking to the kitchen to make himself tea. Setting the phone down and putting it on speaker.

“Hmm…”

Jumim sets the kettle in the sink, filling it with water.

“How about we go out today?.” Seven asked.

Jumin glances at his phone.

“Maybe to a fancy restaurant?, oooo or a diner I could show you one of THHHEEE BEST burger joints ever!.”

“I don’t feel like going out.”

“Come ooonnn~”

“I’m busy-.”

“That could be tomorrow Jumins problem, right now birthday Jumin NEEDS to have fun.”

“But Elizabeth—.”

“Will survive without you— if she can handle you being gone all day for work she can handle you being gone for a couple of more hours. Come on Jumin, I'm not letting you sulk on your birthday.”

“I’m not sulking.”

“Really now?.”

“Yes.”

“Then you won’t have a problem with going out with me.” Luciel said his voice filled with determination.

“Seven it’s not necessary—.”

The line makes a beep sound. Indicating the call has ended.

Jumins eyes widened, turning around quickly from the stove.

He didn’t!.

He looked at his phone.

He did!.

Irritation filled Jumin.

That boy has a knack for being stubborn. Then again so did everyone else in the RFA.

.

.

.

Around an hour, Jumins door burst open, making the older male stand straight up from his couch.

His onyx eyes automatically recognized the head of red hair that seemed to be occupied being squished down by a bowler hat.

Luciel was breathing heavily, his skin pale as he tried catching his breath.

Jumin couldn’t help but take in his appearance.

Luciel was wearing a velvet red tuxedo, his tie surprisingly matching Jumin's hundreds of gray ties.

In a way, Jumin couldn’t help but find it… amusing. Seven was never one to wear a suit, not even at the RFA parties— the most he’d put on his dress shoes, suspenders, and a dress shirt with a brown cheetah print tie to try and match his glasses. Speaking of glasses he wasn’t wearing his usual ones he was wearing red ones to match his tux with a hint of gold on the frames. The bowler hat matched the tie.

Jumin was pulled out of his inner monologue from his young friend's voice.

“Tada! Don’t I look dashing? That’s the word?— Jesus Christ, there were so many stairs… Why didn’t I just take the elevator?…” the hacker wheezed.

The little geniuses took the stairs.

“Seven… there are 99 floors…”

“I know… wheeze..”

“I’m at the top…”

“I know… crap I think I’m finally gonna cry shit my lungs hate me…” Seven coughs, his face was a rosy color gleaned with sweat making his bangs stick to his forehead a bit.

“Luciel… like you already said, why didn’t you use the elevator?.”

“Was in a hurry… didn’t have time to think.”

“Obviously… would you like water?.”

“Yes, please. Can I sit?.”

“Go ahead.”

Luciel moved forward, almost falling. Jumin was ready to catch him but his security guards— who he didn’t know were in here as well -- caught the redhead helping him get to the couch.

He glanced, seeing there were two more they looked kinda concerned. One of them was rubbing their face, their cheek was red.

“What happened to you?.”

“He crashed into me.”

“Luciel?.”

“Yes sir.”

“You got knocked over by him?.” Jumin was pointing at the redhead who was resting on the couch.

“He was running pretty fast sir…”

Jumin is surprised after running up a 99-floor building that Seven still had the energy to keep running when he reached up here and managed to knock over his security by mistake.

He simply shook his head going over to the kitchen to get Luciel water.

After a while.

Of arguing and bickering.

Jumin found himself in one of Seven's cars. In a suit and tie.

They were going to a restaurant. One of Jumins favorites.

“Remind me again why we’re going again?.” He questions the hacker.

Seven rolled his eyes shooting Jumin a smile.

“To celebrate you idiot. Your birth is one to be celebrated!.” Luciel spoke cheerfully.

“Why?.”

“Because I love you JuJu~ and I want you to enjoy your life!.”

…

Love?.

--

Jumin was given a tight hug by a certain redhead. Still very much trapped, he could feel Seven's body vibrating against his in happiness.

“I love you JuJu! Holy shit this is awesome! Suck it Yoosung I got a new monitor and not you! HA!.” he cheered childishly sticking his tongue out to the blonde who gave him a hard glare sticking up his middle finger. Luciel laughed, letting go of the CEO running away from the angry blonde.

He was just enjoying his morning coffee…

It was Christmas morning and the RFA had come together at Jumins house to celebrate the holidays.

Jaehee and MC were sitting on the couch watching the two very grown adults run around like toddlers. Laughing. Jumin sips at his coffee, a presence to his right. He glances to see Zen.

“Ryu.”

“Jumin.”

“Merry Christmas.”

“You too.”

.

.

.

“So… He loves you?.”

All Jumin could do was shrug. He didn't understand it himself but he didn't have the heart to mention it to Seven not wanting to embarrass the boy.

Zen never mentioned it afterward.

--

His body was hot. His face flustered. Body beneath the other.

A low moan left his lips when Luciel thrust into him, both were drunk out of their mind. Note to self never ever allow anyone in the RFA to bring whiskey. Seven buried himself deeply into Jumins hole, all the way to the base of his cock his balls slapping against Jumins ass with each new thrust he gives loving the sweet sounds Jumin makes. Luciel leans forward pressing his lips against the director keeping his rhythm easy for them both.

Jumin ran his fingers through the other's hair gripping those red strands and tugging at them making Luciel moan against his lips. Nipping at Jumins bottom lip.

“Fucking hell Luciel…” he moaned tugging harder at the redhead's hair making him hiss in response his thrust getting quicker.

“Jumin, I Swear keep saying my name like that~,” he growled out, lust filling those honey eyes making something in Jumin crumble.

Kisses and hot frequent touches. Loud and low moans filled the room.

Seven hand was wrapped around Jumins neck as he fucked into him making the bed shake hosting one of the rich man's leg over his shoulders making sure Jumin feels ALL of him.

“I love you,” he whispered, feeling his core tighten as he continued. His eyes trained on Jumin swearing he saw purple hearts in his eyes as he was looking up at the hacker.

Jumin believes he sees red in Sevens as well.

“Luciel…” he choked out his mind foggy from the lack of air. Seven gripped his throat tighter.

“Saeyoung…” Seven replies.

“Wha?.”

“Please… Call me Saeyoung… Scream it, moan it, I don't care, just say please…” Seven pleaded leaning forward, moving Jumins leg down and around his waist once again, his thrust becoming harder hitting Jumins sweet spot countless times. Pulling out beautiful strips of moan from the other male.

He let go of Jumins throat letting him breathe.

“Saeyoung…” Jumin whispers Luciel couldn't help but hide his face against the pillow next to Jumins face as his pace continues. Jumin kept saying it.

His finger dug deep into the hacker's back as Luci forcefully pulled out his moans of pleasure.

“Saeyoung, Saeyoung, Saeyoung!.” he moaned out screaming his name as if it was a prayer Luciel loved and he wanted to keep it.

But what is a drunk man's mind?.

“I love you Jumin.”

They both came. The next morning Luciel made Jumin promise to keep his real name a secret even from their friends.

--

“I love you.”

“Shut up.” Jumin said, covering Saeyoungs stomach with blood leaking between his fingers. Everything was loud in his ears, the Gunshot still ringing causing static in the air. Everyone was screaming– he wanted them to shut up, he wanted them all gone if they weren't gonna help with the injured member of the RFA.

Seven let out a harsh cough. Blood coming up. Fuck! That wasn't good!.

“For fuck- Yoosung! Where are the Medicis!!!.” Jumin didn't have to take his eyes off Seven to know Yoosung was crying as he was talking to 911.

“Awe you care~...” Seven teased a weak smile on his face, his glasses discarded somewhere broken.

“Don’t joke, right now is not the time. For once just listen to me and shut Up! YOOSUNG!.” he snapped his heart in his throat watching the other man turn pale before his eyes fighting to stay with Jumin.

“They said they're close!.”

“Not good enough! He's losing a lot of blood and dying! Tell them to hurry up!.” Jumin's brain was loud, he remembers having a conversation about this with Seven. Something about trauma– going through a traumatic experience can cause the brain to go into shock and freak out and cause you to not act like yourself – something about adrenaline.

“JuJu.”

“For fuck sake Seven please shut up!.”

“Where Jaehee?.”

“She's escorting the guest outside safely.”

“MC?.”

“Seven I'm begging you.” he started to shake seeing the way Seven was slipping the more he spoke.

“Please Jumin…”

“She's outside, she's safe.”

“Good Good. Where's Zen?...”

Heavy feet came towards them. It was Zen.

Zen crouched down next to Seven body placing his large hands on his face pushing his bangs out of his face.

“I'm right here jester,” Zen spoke in a soft tone. Being the calm to Jumins rageful fear.

“Heh heh. Everyone ok?.”

“Yes… Don't worry Luci just please stop talking and save your strength.” Zen continued stroking the man's face trying to keep him awake.

Jumin pressed harder on the wound making Seven grunt-- good he still felt pain.

“I told you all not to get too close… Not to get attached.” Seven wheezed out. Giving both men a funny smile blood coming out his nose. Jumin feels like he is seconds away from passing out.

Zen let out a wet laugh. “Too bad Jester we love your stupid annoying ass”

Seven looked up to Jumin.

Jumin knew what he was asking.

“Saeyoung live so I can tell you…” he pleaded.

He saw when Seven left, and he heard when the RFA doors burst open with the paramedics.

A loud humming sound was in his ears.

He felt hands on him, multiple. They were pulling him away, pulling him away from Seven— he didn’t want to leave Seven alone!.

So he fought back but the hands kept a firm grip on him arms wrapping around him.

He heard screaming. Agonizing screaming.

It was Jumin.

Cold Jumin Han was screaming… and crying. And Zen continued to hold onto the rich man tightly. Yoosung and Jaehee by their side crying, wrapping all of them in a hug.

They looked like a family.

--

“You can’t find him at all?…”

“No, sorry Seven…”

“It’s okay Vanderwood…”

The redhead sighed looking out his hospital window.

“Saren was always the faster runner anyway.” He continues, rubbing his stomach absentmindedly where his brother had shot him. Seven saw it as a piece of Saren that he could alway and forever keep now. He hopes the wound never heals.

Seven room door slams open making him and Vanderwood jump in surprise looking at it Vanderwood hand near his hidden taser.

Jumin's hand was over his heart as he panted.

“Damn JuJu you look worse than I do…” Seven says taking in the business man appearance. He looked unorganized, his eyes were colder and more tired, his skin paler— he hasn’t been sleeping or eating.

Jumin head shot towards Seven. The nurses weren’t lying. He was awake.

“What? Saw a gho— ack!.” He grunted, hugging his stomach over the wound where Vanderwood hit him.

“No time for joking, don’t be insensitive now. I understand you don’t like serious conversation or scenes but now is not the time.” Vanderwood scolded. His eyes went on Jumin who was already looking at him.

“Mr. Han.” Vanderwood says simply, crossing his arms.

“And you?.” He acknowledged.

“No one.” Seven and Vanderwood answered together, looking at one another. Vanderwood actually cracked a smile for once at that.

Jumin knew best not to question. If Seven said it as well then it means nothing and might cause issues if Jumin tries to push. The best he does is nod.

Vanderwood stares for a while then sighs.

“I’m gonna go, Seven don’t strain yourself.”

“Yes madam~” he smiled cheekily.

“You’re injured. That doesn’t mean I won’t make it worse.” Vanderwood lightly warned.

“Yes sir.”

“I’m gonna kill this kid.” He mumbled walking past Jumin, shutting the door behind him.

Silence filled the room.

Seven didn’t like it.

“So— how’s business— hey!.” He exclaims being wrapped into a hug. Jumin burying his face into Sevens neck.

“Jumin?.”

.

.

.

“I love you…” Jumin responds quietly so only Seven can hear.

“Jumin—.”

“Shut it… you and that damn motor mouth…”

“…”

“I love you… I love you so much…”

“I love you Saeyoung…”