#childe is going to have to let foul legacy out more often

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

childhood friends au…. ough..

childe who fell into the abyss with only your memory and a small token from you as company.. childe who’s defensive, afraid of foul legacy at first even as he knows he’s his only way out, who thinks he’s no better than the rest of the abyss and protects your memory with teeth and claw.

foul legacy who just wants to leave, who offers his help to a mortal man so they both can escape, even if he’s semi-permanently delegated to the back of his mind… legacy who can feel the fondness with which he looks at the token, memories just on the other side of the barrier separating their minds.

and he whines, pushing at it, wanting to know what this soft emotion is, why childe’s chest feels so warm and why he wants it too, only for childe to close his hand around it and tuck it away, determined to keep the two halves of his life separate.

he can’t. as he’s walking through morepesok he feels abyss run through his veins, he knows that no matter how hard he tries that he can’t keep legacy from you… and as he stops outside your door, a hand raised, he wonders if it’s worth bringing the abyss to a place full of light.

the door opens before he can decide and you startle, blinking up at the man you hadn’t heard from in months—he didn’t dare allow legacy to see the one he held closest to his heart—and he slowly lowers his hand, nervous for both the one in his heart and the one in his mind.

you pull him into a hug at the same time his legacy trills, a soft sound so unlike anything he’s heard before that it takes him off guard. still, he holds you close, barely having the sense to kick the door shut.

everything suddenly makes sense to legacy, as he experiences your love second hand. there’s a veil of ice between him and you, one he knows he can’t break so he settles for leaning into it, focusing not on the coos slipping from his mask but of the bright warmth. he wishes childe never had kept you to himself, even as he understands why, as he knows that something as stained as him has no place near something as beautiful as you.

abyssal stars meet the brightest sun, with ajax caught in the middle.

oh this is a FULL MEAL RIGHT HERE!!!! thank you anon this is absolutely lovely!!

Childe can feel Foul Legacy in his mind, purring and curling around any bit of affection he can grasp like a cat- normally his Abyssal half silently surveys the world above through his eyes, occasionally dozing off or growling when sensing danger- but whenever you happen to be nearby, Foul Legacy's wide awake, watching your every move. but somehow, Childe can tell it's not malicious- in fact, it's just the opposite, with the way Foul Legacy's claws twitch and rumbles, wanting nothing more than to wrap you in a warm hug and snuggle you close, basking in the light you bring

and Childe would prefer that you and Foul Legacy never meet, and keeps you as far away from his Abyssal side as possible until the day he runs into a particularly bad camp of hilichurls- of course he's able to take care of them, but is left in his Foul Legacy form, bleeding and exhausted. Foul Legacy's consciousness is in control, Childe's head vague and hazy, and he clicks and yelps in pain despite his attempts to bite his tongue

he needs help- they need help- and your house is so much closer...

when you open your door to a enormous horned monster, you nearly scream and slam it shut, but force yourself to remain still when it whimpers, claws pressing to multiple wounds on its body and sound tugging at your heartstrings. it collapses on the floor once you let it inside, single crystalline eye never looking away as you rush to get medical supplies, and when you're about to start the creature simply takes your hands and wraps its talons around them, staring at you and letting out a low, rumbling purr

it looks happy, delighted, even as it bleeds out on your floor, and once every injury is wrapped the beast simply leans forward and presses its head against your chest, letting out soft coos and clicks when you hesitantly run your fingers through its thick ginger hair. Foul Legacy rejoices, trilling and crooning at your warm embrace and gentle touch, directed towards him- just him, not Childe. although it hurts to move, he curls around you and clings to your arm, holding you like you're a precious treasure, the ice between you and him finally melting away

when Childe wakes up the next morning, he remembers nothing, only aware of the content, hopeful way Foul Legacy purrs in the back of his mind

[cherrieflavouredheadcanons]

Lover behind bars

Summary: Set after 4.0. You visit Childe in Fontaines prison, unsure of how to react to the fact that your lover is behind bars. You know he is innocent but Fontaines juridical system is convoluted, what if he gets punished as if he was guilty?

CW: None Cross posted to AO3 GN Reader Spoilers for 4.0

Walking down the stairs of Fontaines prison, being led by a guard you thought back on how you got into this situation.

It started when you wanted to visit Childe on his mission in Fontaine. It was a surprise visit since you two hadn’t seen each other in a while and you really missed your boyfriend. While he often tried to make time for you, lately he has been flooded with work over work and barely had any time to see you. If you saw each other it was only for a few seconds where he quickly kissed your cheek and told you that he loved you.

So when you learned that he would be stationed in Fontaine for a bit, you decided to pack your bags and visit the nation of Hydro and surprise your boyfriend while doing so.

And surprised he was when he suddenly felt you tap him on his shoulder and he turned around and saw you smiling at him while saying “Surprise!” He had been so happy that he had picked you up and spun you around, not caring that the people around you started staring. You did not care either, just happy to enjoy the feeling of being in his arms again.

The next days were peaceful for you two, even though Childe had some business to attend to and some champion duelists to battle, he made sure that you two were spending some good quality time together. He spoiled you to the best and most expensive food Fontaine has to offer, buying you whatever items you laid your eyes on for more than a second. Even if you told him that he did not have to do all this, he insisted, especially with how absent he was the last weeks, he wanted to spoil you. Knowing there was no way to get him to change his mind you let him keep spoiling you.

That is until one day the two of you were walking together near the Fountain of Lucine when suddenly 

“11th of the Fatui Harbingers Tartaglia. You are under arrest for being the prime suspect in the serial disappearances case!”

Both you and Childe were confused, neither of you having even heard of this case, so how was he the prime suspect? 

But there was nothing you could do as he was being taken away but to await his trial, surely it would come out that they had the wrong suspect and that Childe did nothing wrong…Right?

When the Traveler had entered the courtroom and revealed who truly was behind the disappearances you felt a heavy weight lift off of your shoulders, it would all be fine and you and Childe could go back to your peaceful lives. He apparently just had to be judged by the Orattrice and he would go off free. You had been sure that since the Chief Justice declared him innocent, the machine surely would too but clearly you were wrong and honestly somewhat annoyed but also scared of what would happen to him now.

Childe clearly was even more annoyed than you, just in his case he decided to actively rebel against the judgement which ended with him being on the ground after Neuvillete had stepped in. You wondered how strong the Chief Justice was considering he easily knocked Childe down, even when he was about to use Foul Legacy.

You tried to shake the thoughts of the past days off as you walked along the many cells in Fontaines prison. 

Though you were quickly brought back to reality when you bumped into the guards back since they had suddenly stopped.

“Here he is. Only 15 minutes. You are already lucky enough you can even be here. Normally this never happens.”

“Yeah, yeah…thank you.” You mumbled as you turned to the cell and looked into it.

Childe’s hair was dishevelled, and he seemed to be exhausted, but that was probably due to trying to activate foul legacy and getting bodied by Neuvillette. 

His eyes were downcast, and he seemed confused, angry, and…tired. Yet when he saw you he put on a happy face.

“My sweet darling, how nice of you to visit me! My lonely day in this prison now has been severely made better.”

His happy attitude did not help you in your emotional state, he was in prison yet he had the nerve to act so happy and carefree?

“My my, why do you seem so annoyed? Shouldn’t you be happy to see me?”

“Happy to see you in prison? Ajax, do you know how much I had to beg to get to see you. Could you please not act so nonchalant? You are in prison! You may not have done what you are being accused of, but I always warned you that one day your idiotic and battle lusty behaviour would get your idiot ass to prison. And clearly I was right!”

Childe wanted to pretend to be offended, to lighten the mood and hopefully somehow make you laugh. That was when he saw the worry and tears in your eyes. You weren’t angry at him…no you were scared. 

He was with you when you learned that Fontaine had the Death Penalty. At that point that information had shocked you, but you hadn’t thought more of it until it now affected you and your boyfriend directly. Even if it was rarely carried out…Childe was a Fatui Harbinger and neither of you knew if that fact would make his punishment worse than if he had been a normal person. 

You had tried to keep your tears at bay, to not cry and instead to talk with your boyfriend normally and also maybe reprimand him for trying to activate his foul legacy in court but…you couldn’t. Seeing him behind bars and the uncertainty of what would happen with him was too much for you. You turned your gaze downward, not wanting to meet his gaze.

Childe’s heart broke when the tears were falling from you eyes. He wanted to reach out and wipe your tears away but he couldn’t, the cells in Fontaine had an invisible wall between the bars so convicts couldn’t even put their hand through them.

It hurt him to see you like this all because of him, when you two started going out together he swore to himself that he would make sure he’d never be the reason for your tears yet here you were crying because of him.

“Hey, look at me please?” His voice was gentle, kind, gone was the teasing and amused tone and replaced by that of a worried lover. So you did as you were asked, your eyes which were still streaming tears, meeting his blue ones which were filled with worry, love and comfort. 

All for you.

“I know this is not how you imagined we would spend our time in Fontaine and I am sorry that it has to be like this. I know you came here so we could catch up on lost time together and now this has all been ripped away from us. But I promise, promise by the Tsaritsa, the other archons and every other god that is out there, that I will get out of this soon and I will be able to hold you once again. To wipe your tears away and comfort you as much as you need. You are so important to me that I can’t be away from you long. Afterall if I am here in this dingy cell, who will be there for you to protect you from bad guys…well bad guys that aren’t me.”

The smile he had on his face now, wasn’t a fake one, it was one that showed you he was confident that every word he just spoke was the truth. It made you smile as well, despite the tears.

He would get out soon, and would be by your side again. 

And if he believed it with all his heart, so did you.

[watatsumiis]

Reactions to Being Ignored for Video Games (part 2)

Modern AU Genshin characters react to the reader not paying attention to them in favour of a video game! No content warnings apply. Enjoy!

Characters: Dainsleif, Diluc, Dottore, Foul Legacy, Gorou, Itto

Part 1 (Ayato, Arlecchino, Baizhu, Capitano, Childe, Cyno)

Part 3 (Heizou, Kaveh, Kazuha, Lisa, Pantalone, Pierro)

Dainsleif acts like a sad little puppy at the first hint of you not paying attention to him. He won't admit it but he can be pretty insecure and he doesn't like to have to compete for the attention of the ones he cares about. He'll only repeat himself once or twice before he just turns and leaves the room. He doesn't mind playing along if you invite him though, but he isn't very good at most games since it's just not something he does very often. You have to walk him through the controls every time and explain how to do certain things over and over, but once he's got the hang of it he's not entirely terrible. 

Diluc doesn't mind - he understands more than anyone that sometimes people need something to help them pull away from reality, something to keep their minds and hands occupied for a little while. He's perfectly content to wait until there's a lull in the gameplay to ask for your full attention. He's not afraid to stand in front of the TV or wave a hand in front of the screen if you continue to neglect him, though, and he can get kind of stern and pouty about it if he thinks you're being rude on purpose. He may occasionally ask to play games with you, but less because he actually enjoys them and more because he sees it as another way to connect with the ones he cares about. 

Dottore will not hear a word of it. If he has sought you out, he expects your full and undivided attention until he tires of it, regardless of what you were doing beforehand. If ignoring him for video games becomes a common occurrence, he just turns them off the moment he walks into the room, pulling out the power cords or pressing buttons until the screen goes black. He has very little interest in video games himself (except for the odd management simulator), but on occasion he may just sit down and observe, ask you questions about the games you're playing and document your responses carefully. He doesn't seem to realise the reason you get so flighty and pause the game when he walks in is because of his well documented history of unplugging things mid-game.

Foul Legacy can be a little unpredictable. For the most part, he's more than content to curl up next to you and simply bask in your presence as you do whatever you feel like doing (provided it doesn't disturb him too much), but if he feels like you've forgotten he's there, he may worry at your clothing or skin with clawed fingers and let out these barely audible peeeeeps as he frets for you. Usually just giving him a pat on the head or wrapping an arm around him will be enough to calm him down. Though, if he's trying to speak to you and you miss what he's saying because you're busy, he'll get all downtrodden and upset and go pout in a corner somewhere until you go over and give him your complete attention until he's wrangled the words out. 

Gorou tries to be nice about it, he really does. He tries to be patient and understanding, but he can't help the puppy-like whimpers that escape from the back of his throat in time with his breathing if you've been ignoring him for too long. His tail will hang between his legs and his ears will go flat against his head as he stands off to the side, shifting his weight between his feet as he wrings his hands. Though on a surface level he seems to be polite and nice, he can't help but fret and wonder if he's done something wrong. He'll keep an eye on your game and wait for quiet moments before he tries to speak up again, often stumbling over his words as he tries to grab your attention. He loves video games, and if you're playing one he particularly likes or wants to play with you, he makes it painfully obvious, looking over at the extra controller or between you and the television as his tail twitches. Try as he might, Gorou simply can't control his body language, so it's always easy to tell what he's pining for. 

Itto barely gives you a chance to ignore him - he's big and bold and loud, it's hard not to pay at least some semblance of attention to him when he's in the room. If you somehow manage to ignore him though, he turns into a whiny little kid, wandering in front of the TV and demanding to be allowed to play. If you ignore him for long enough, he just goes and sits in a corner with his arms crossed and that adorable pouty look on his face, glancing over at you all the time to see whether you’re paying any attention to him. If you leave him hanging for long enough, he gets frustrated and just strongarms his way into playing, whether that be by jumping in with an extra controller unannounced or just snatching yours away so that he can have a turn. He’s super competitive with multiplayer games, even if they’re supposed to be cooperative. He’ll turn every single game into a competition of some sort, then brag about ‘winning’ a challenge you weren’t even aware existed.

Please don't repost, steal, copy or otherwise plagarise my writing! This includes posting translations to other sites (without credit + permission).

[letpaimonbitepeople]

a collection of my Childe headcanons (from my fic)

part 1 of ??

featuring aroace!Childe, PTSD, contradictions, self-awareness, and Pulcinella slander

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He heard there was a type of hooked sword used in Liyue, always in pair, that fell out of favor and completely disappeared from the smithies. Years ago he mastered a hooked sword made by a retired Snezhnayan smith who'd taken to producing more creative designs as a hobby.

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Being out in the elements isn't something he minds (unless it's hot and there are mosquitoes)

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He estimates that six days in [the Mystic Onmyou Chamber] took a similar toll, in terms of muscle strain if nothing else, as...somewhere around thirty seconds of Foul Legacy, give or take depending on how fresh he goes into it and how fast he moves.

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The farthest Childe has been into Mondstadt is Dragonspine

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[when asked if he believes his ends justify his means:] "Hmm. I could explain in a few different ways... Let's go with this. There are many people in the world who have achieved excellence in combat. I'm not alone in seeking that kind of power at all costs. The stronger I get, the higher I rise on the list of Teyvat's greatest warriors that no one's written. I take the place of those I exceed. There's someone at the top. Why shouldn't that be me instead? And by taking that place, I would conquer the world."

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Amid his fantasies of growing powerful enough at the Traveler's side to defeat all the other Harbingers, he knew he had to face the question of his family at some point. He did know. The Fifth Harbinger, Pulcinella, has been looking after his family for years and, to a degree, that was comforting knowledge. He even treats Childe himself like family. But Childe has known, too, for most of those years, that he can't fully trust the Rooster's motivations; he's still a Harbinger, with all the opaque schemes that title implies. He's not ungrateful for the old man's kindness. Part of him wishes he could trust him more, but Pulcinella has a ruthless side when it comes to Fatui 'assets' beneath him, and that doesn't sit well with Childe.

He's reluctant to face how intractably complex his situation actually is.

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Joining the Fatui wasn't his choice. Even so, he hadn't minded it, to say the least. It gave him much of what he desired at the time. The structure chafed a little, but he saw it as a good bargain: just follow orders and he'd get training, experience, and opportunities to kill without inconvenient repercussions. Then he became a Harbinger and met the Tsaritsa that same day, gaining much freer rein and the inspiration of an authority figure who was worth his utmost respect.

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Too often he was cooped up in the Northland Bank with paperwork: reports, orders, assignments, requisitions, logistics, intel. He generally didn't even have time to ignore propriety and go out collecting the bank's debts himself. Fatui operations in Liyue required much more attention from him after the Osial incident than before.

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On his long walk he's been keeping a hungry eye out for nobushi, Treasure Hoarders, hilichurls—anything he can sink a blade into. The tension in his body is a particular sensation that makes him feel like he needs to crack every joint at once. Getting into a fight would loosen him up at least, and maybe even clear his head.

[...]

Childe is starting to get a taste of adrenaline. It's only been two days since he last got to savor it, but he missed it. It's a prickling sensation in his chest, not the sweet stab that emergency adrenaline gives him, but the faster he moves, the more that cleansing prickle spreads through his limbs.

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"Sorrow and hesitation are the enemy of an implacable weapon." He'd said that to Shiki Taishou. He completely believes in those words. It's too bad he doesn't live up to them.

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He always tries to pick up some local phrases when he gets to travel to a new place.

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[...] dodging and ducking and jumping with increasing acrobatics just to feel himself move.

[...]

"Just because you can backflip into a lateral spin doesn't mean you should. Ha, anyone who's seen me fight would call me a hypocrite for saying that. But when I make use of acrobatics, it's to maintain a certain momentum, as well as to overwhelm my opponent with attacks from many angles." Childe lazily twirls his Hydro polearm, switching the direction and grip every few seconds: fidgeting, but quite relaxed, almost like a cat kneading its claws into a sofa cushion. "Often, it's assisted by my Vision, letting me conserve some of the physical energy such movements can be expected to cost. You might be able to do something similar with your own Vision, but for now, you're spending too much effort for what you're gaining in positional advantages."

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If he's Zhongli's wallet (and he knows he is), Pantalone—or 'Regrator'—is technically his. It's Regrator's financial activities that fund the Fatui so abundantly. That doesn't mean he enjoys interacting with the man. You can't attain that kind of wealth without every bone in your body being a conniving one.

[...]

He doesn't mind Zhongli's financial habits at all, and in fact he's developed an affection for the old man's idiosyncrasies. Maybe that was why he couldn't stay mad at him forever. That, and he doesn't have enough friends to lose Zhongli without eventually missing him more than the betrayal itself hurt him. (He prefers to think of it as 'injured pride,' but...it really hurt to be used that way by someone he'd made the mistake of not expecting it from.)

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Indecision isn't his style

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He checks the price on the menu again and lays enough Mora on the bar to cover a 50% tip as well.

"That's too much," Shimura observes.

"I included a tip, nothing to worry about."

"Alright then, if you're sure. Chopsticks?"

Childe has a hasty and rather nervous debate with himself over whether to take the utensils that have defeated him before. Since they're optional, eating with one's hands must be socially acceptable here. But he should probably give them another try... In a way, they're a weapon, aren't they? Theoretically? And he has to master every weapon.

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He never thinks about sex or romance. It simply holds no interest for him, and that's been true since before the Abyss. Back then, the other teenagers in Morepesok mystified him with their relationships and their hushed, tittering discussions. All he dreamed of was adventure. His mother once said he was 'just a late bloomer.'

He has tried it. [...] It wasn't an unpleasant experience in any way, but it didn't enlighten him as to why sex is such a big deal for most people. He found it no better than having a nice meal, and it was nothing compared to a good, death-defying melee.

[...]

He's pretty self-assured that if he was ever capable of romantic love, he isn't anymore, for reasons that have nothing to do with natural inclination or lack thereof.

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Not all of the fun that gets his heart pumping is violent these days: sometimes he'll surf down a waterfall or experiment with other applications of Hydro that aren't necessarily combat-related. But that's always when he's alone. At most, there were some foes he was on his way to.

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The Abyss didn't change his perceptions of people very much, other than making him keenly aware at all times of every method by which he might kill whichever person he looks at, and making everpresent in his mind a deep curiosity as to whether a given person could win if he did attack them. But being in the Fatui? That scrubbed much of his original naivety out of him.

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Childe isn't inclined to a lot of conscious tactical thinking; combat is a time to stop thinking and flow with his hard-won instincts.

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There weren't many strays in Morepesok; the winter tended to cull them. There were a few, though. In the old days, Childe liked dogs and cats pretty equally. But after three months of fighting everything that moved, everything that moved looked like an enemy in his peripheral vision. It wasn't that he feared animals, it was that when he looked at an animal, just like with humans, he saw all too vividly how he could kill it. Kind of put a damper on things. Something like a dog or cat could never provide him a challenge, however, nor threaten his life, so he never wanted to harm one. That gulf between his new instincts and his desires was...uncomfortable. Better avoided than confronted.

It's been years, though. He's become used to those instincts and how they're always there regardless of context or intentions. He can ignore the almost premonition-like flashes of violence behind his eyes when he wants to.

He can ignore them, but they don't go away.

[...]

He's been followed by one dog or another in Liyue from time to time, but who hasn't?

They were never afraid of him. Even when he'd just walked out of a building where he'd nearly killed someone in a scuffle over a debt. Though he washed his hands in Hydro before leaving, they had to've still smelled like blood. It doesn't make sense. It doesn't square with the image he very rightfully has of himself as a bad and dangerous person.

Well, what do they know? Nothing, obviously.

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He is proud of every scar he has, even the ones he got doing stupid things, because every one of them represents a lesson learned, a step on his path to power.

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Childe was the codename he chose when he joined the Fatui. Tartaglia was the name he was awarded when he became a Harbinger.

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The usual nightmare, if it can even be called that. It's the same every time, differing only in unimportant details. He'll be in the Abyss, running through the endless corridors, fighting his way through endless monsters. Running from nothing, to nothing. There is only the fight, the struggle, survival from moment to moment. He has always been there and he will always be there: that is his certainty in the dream.

It's old. Predictable. Trite. A nightmare at once too ham-fisted and too real to frighten him. It doesn't jolt him awake or anything dramatic like that. He typically wakes up in the morning just like the normal person he isn't, remembering the dream but not held in its sway.

[yoroiis]

A hand pressed against Childe's back, fingers trailing along his side, tracing, studying with slow every step Tempest took. It'd been a long time since she'd been so close to his Foul Legacy 'form' like this, especially without a threat around to have forced it, and she was going to take the chance she'd been given, lips curling into a half smirk, half grin as she circled around him. Power... She could feel the power coursing through him, electrifying enough to send the barest hint of a shudder down her spine, violet-flecked blue eyes turning up to the familiar mask hiding her husband's face.

"I do prefer you without the mask," she teased, fingertips sliding quickly over the armor covering his stomach and chest, rising up until they could rest under his chin, thumb tracing along the point of his mask. "Though this look of yours... It's really something else." So is your own, she knew he'd retaliate with; in exchange for a training session against Legacy, she'd offered her own abyssal side, Heraldic Tempest's own form a more 'wild' appearing version of herself she didn't often get a chance to fully unleash. The crackles of electricity around her were still difficult to control, admittedly, and she'd had to beg him for the chance to work at it, but she could still never go without a compliment in return whenever she'd given him one!

With another moment passed, Tempest let out a light laugh, taking a step back and away from him. "Still feel up to letting me give you a run for your money... Legacy?"

Kag was lucky — in more ways than one. She'd asked for this training match, and usually, Childe wouldn't have even entertained the notion of letting one of their spars go so far that they were both pushing their maximum strength. Foul Legacy drained too much from him, and for Kag, the effects were sometimes worse.

Still, she'd poke and prodded and roughed him up enough during the opening swings of their practice fight that Childe had given in. That was her first lucky chance.

Her second was knowing how privileged she was to be able to touch him so personally when the power of the Abyss was coursing through him like it was. Foul Legacy often demanded battle and bloodshed and to tame that side of him was no different than quelling the rage of a hungry, cornered tiger.

" Heh, come on now! " he'd laugh, letting Tempest walk away despite sounding like he was mocking her for the retreat. " You push me this far and you're still asking if I'm up for the challenge? I'd say you should've decided that long before you decided to test your limits. "

[the-things-i-love]

Ok, so! I’m kinda pumping these out because I keep getting ideas the more I play Genshin. But also… I think, at least in my case, I may be the yandere here? All the lines the Overseer says are word-for-word the things I said before I turned Genshin off to write this. Not gonna lie, not too proud of this one.

✧Fandom; Genshin Impact

✧SAGAU (Self-Aware Genshin AU)

✧Characters; Childe, Traveler (briefly mentioned), Zhongli (briefly mentioned), Raiden Shogun (briefly mentioned)

✧Pairing(s); Childe × GN!Reader/Overseer

✧Warning(s)/Genre(s); Possessive thoughts, possessive behaviour

Oh, today was going to be dangerous… 

Standing on the Starconch-rich shores between Yaoguang Shoal and the Guyun Stone Forest, a place already so dear to him, there was a giddiness to the eleventh Harbinger. Was it the near bloodthirsty gaze the former Archon of Geo regarded him with? The way nature curled in on itself, ready to strike him down with the Traveler at his flank? Or was it the gentle crackle of Electro as the stoic ruler of Inazuma stared him down? Any other day, the downright provocative air would be the only thing he cared about, but not today.

~

It had been months since he’d felt the pull, months since the creator had enlisted his services; well, for anything more long-term than a domain, at least. Sure, this meant he had time to actually focus on his work for the Tsaritsa, but he longed for combat! The thrill of battle! Adrenaline coursing through his veins as he split open and emptied those of his opponents! Alas, it wasn’t meant to be… or so he’d thought.

As was typical, he’d had his weekly battle with the Overseer’s cherished. Suffice to say his ass had been thoroughly handed to him. The satisfying ache in his muscles from both the brawl itself and the activation of his Delusion never grew old. Then imagine his surprise when he found himself summoned to the crafting bench in Liyue Harbour. Considering he was, understandably, a wanted man after the freeing of Osial he should have expected to be set upon by Milileth. Well, he would have thought that months ago. But, even laymen could feel the watchful eye of the Overseer.

There wasn’t a mortal alive foolish enough to lay hands on one of their cherished right in front of them. That already would have been delightful enough. But, the Overseer had another surprise ready for him. An identical corsage to the one already adorning his lapel quickly took its predecessor’s place, as did an identical tricorne to the one sitting beside his mask. More gifts? After the creator had already gifted him Thundering Pulse mere months ago? He wasn’t going to say no!

“Let’s test these bad boys out, shall we?”

Phantom but familiar, their voice rang clear as a bell. It was then that he, and the rest of the party, found themselves teleported above a trio of Treasure Hoarders on the cliffs overlooking Guyun Stone Forest. His heart began to race. Now the Overseer was speaking his language.

Each arrow struck true, as they always do, but he saw how strongly his ‘opponents’ reacted to them. These attacks were hitting harder, more often infused with the power of his Foul Legacy. Was it the artifacts? It appeared the Overseer was unsatisfied leaving their “tests” at that. Below them, one of his innumerable subordinates waltzed through the Liyue landscape. She was felled just as quickly, all by his own hand. As were the Treasure Hoarders just a small ways up the coast.

His heartbeat thundered in his ears, chest heaving, eyes utterly wild in the aftermath of the consecutive - albeit short-lived - battles. But then, their voice called to him once more; phantom, familiar… adoring?

“I’ve missed you so much, Ajax!”

“Look at you, you’re magnificent!”

“I’m so sorry I haven’t been using you…”

Usually, his eyes were as devoid of light as the Abyss he’d fallen into all those years ago. Right now? If one were to look closely enough, they would catch a strange twinkle in those unknowable depths. The borderline reverence in the Overseer’s voice was almost tangible, if his companions’ expressions were anything to go by. He could practically taste the raw passion they regarded him with. It was dizzying, thrilling… addictive.

“...they stayed at that table, crafting and recrafting just those two artifacts for you, Childe…” Had his comrade truly just spoken for themselves? Usually, the little fairy creature they kept company with was their mouth piece. The paper-white of their knuckles over the grip of Festering Desire spoke even louder. The Outlander was jealous.

You, the highest entity of Teyvat, beloved by all beneath your gaze, capable of feats no mortal could dare to dream of, had invested so much attention into him. Before this, you had gifted him a weapon only he was allowed to use. Before even that, you had toiled away, ensuring he was the most powerful of your cherished. Your affections for him were clear as the stars. You, their Overseer, their beloved creator, had furnished him, one of your cherished, so readily in your favour…

Under the envious gazes of his travel companions, and the warm regard of the Overseer, Childe was briefly reminded of that glorious day; the day the Tsarista had given him his Delusion. Ice crystals had nestled into Tonia’s furrowed brows that morning, she’d been glaring at him that much. Teucer had been both delighted and distraught that his older brother was being recognised by Childe’s “boss” as the great toy-seller he was as it meant they'd see even less of each other. The chill in the air had been as harsh and refreshing as that of Dragonspine.

That day, Ajax was put aside; a special moniker for when he was at home, when his bloodlust was slaked and his duty was to his family. That day, he had recognised the true warrior that he would serve, that would go on with his undying loyalty. That day, he became Tartaglia, the Tsarista’s 11th Harbinger to whom he swore unwavering fealty.

But this day, with the love of the Overseer made abundantly clear and filling the seat of his heart with a peculiar sensation he could only really compare to the thrill of combat…

“Never leave again?”

His lips curled into a soft, boyish grin as their omniscient voice cooed from every direction. Perhaps the Tsarista could learn to share him?

Again, not super proud of this one. But, I had the idea so I threw down the word-vomit. I'm lingering on some Tighnari thoughts lately. Maybe even Dain? I think I'm gonna try and explore the more genuinely yandere aspects of the SAGAU. So, probably going to go a little more into the Cult SAGAU? We'll see, I guess.

[childe-the-harbinger]

18+ Genshin Headcanons

Genre: Smut

Characters: Heizou, Kazuha, Beidou, Kaeya, Childe

Warnings: being tied up, cunnilingis, doing it in public, alcohol, language

masterlist

Heizou

•He's really into tying you up.

•Enjoys using handcuffs and cuffs you to the bedpost

•5in. soft and 6 1/2 hard

•He likes being rough with you, just as long as you are comfortable with it

•When he's being dominated, he whimpers and whines

•Whispers cuss words under his breath frequently

•"Ah, shit... fuck. Man, y/n.."

•He has really sensitive nipples. Circle your fingers on them long enough and he'll cum right then and there.

•He's really good with his hands. He knows just the places to touch for you to go crazy for him.

Kazuha

•He doesn't often have sex, but whenever he does, he prefers you to initiate it

•He's probably a bottom.. Sorry, Kazuha stans.

•6In. soft 7In. hard

•He likes when you sit on his face, though.

•He doesn't like for it to be in public; not a big PDA fan at all.

•"Mmh.. More.."

•Just like that one scene where he got drunk.

•He's really into how you sound. Your voice and your moans.

•(Fem hc) Whenever he's on top, he'd eat your pussy out.

Beidou

•She's really experienced. She could top you 100%.

•She'd want to do it anywhere. Behind the wheel of the crux, in somebody else's bedroom, anywhere.

•She definitely got a 2 on her rice purity test.

•She's rough, and I mean ROUGH.

•(With consent. She's respectful.)

•Afterwards, she'd probably be like "Yo let's go get a drink" as if nothing happened

Kaeya

•Though he may seem like a flirt and a kinky person, he's not really experienced in the sex field.

•He's really into toys and threesomes. He wants as many people pleasuring him as possible.

•He isn't rough on you, but he wants you to be rough on him. He wants you to touch his nipples and play with his genitalia at the same time.

•VERY needy.

•He's into degrading. Both sending and receiving.

• 6 1/2In. soft 7 3/4In. hard

Childe

•He's a dom. And a sadist.

•He doesn't have sex to receive pleasure himself, more so to see his partners face while he's giving it.

•Sometimes, he'll go into foul legacy form when he's wanting to pleasure you to the max.

•Always asks "How does that feel? Do you like that?"

•May seem rough, but he wants to make sure you're okay the whole time.

•BIG DICK ENERGY.

[opalesense]

Dick headcanons for Kaeya, Diluc, Childe, and Zhongli? 👀

dick headcanons

kaeya, diluc, childe, zhongli & gn!reader (NSFW)

1.1k words • ~9 min. read

warnings: cockwarming, blood mention, size difference, liyue arc spoilers

notes: SUPER delayed response (i’m so sorry) because i genuinely took a couple days to think about some fictional characters’ dicks??? i think it’s time to touch some grass?? ANYWAY i hope i did this request justice, i’ve never thought about this stuff in detail before :0

kaeya

i’ve always imagined that kaeya really has some LENGTH. he’s slightly above average so it’s not monstrously large, but he can definitely hit your sweet spots with ease or no effort at all.

it’s to the point where he can easily make bulges in your throat or your stomach. he absolutely loves watching his entire length disappear inside you and will either tease you about how he fits inside so well or how he’s so big that he can’t fit in you. just depends, of course.

cockwarming!!!! especially if you take his entire length in so well, expect him to ask if he can bury himself in you when the opportunity presents itself.

not super related to the topic but he’s the type to “fake bang” you if you’re bent over just to tease you. also the type to discretely grind his bulge against you when he’s in the mood, whether you’re hugging, cooking a meal, or even in the middle of a conversation with someone. he will not hesitate to let you know he wants you by letting you feel how hard you make him.

i don’t think many people talk about this but i imagine he’s uncircumcised... it’s going to sound so stupid but the “always hiding something” characterization... i’ll stop talking, you probably get it now HAHA

very well groomed down there! he truly does care about appearances and cleanliness after all. you never have to worry about poor hygiene with him in general. even though he loves doing dirty things with you there’s no doubt that he will always keep his dick as clean as possible. (shouldn’t everyone, though?)

he loves feeling tightness around his cock. whether it’s your hand pumping him or his form fitting pants restricting his bulge, firm pressure against that area can make his heart race. sometimes he can just be so needy for his cock to get attention.

diluc

despite being around average size he really has some girth on him! his cock is deliciously thick, that’s for sure.

twitchy! you can learn what he loves by the way his cock or his hips will twitch in excitement, almost as if it has a mind of its own. sometimes he can get so lost in the feeling and become speechless that those twitches would be your only indicator to keep doing what you’re doing.

his tip is so sensitive... if you lick that specific spot underneath his head or use your fingers to squeeze his tip, he will absolutely lose his mind. he also likes to shallow fuck you sometimes, loving the feeling of penetrating you over and over again.

that being said, expect him to usually take things slow and steady at first. he loves seeing the way his cock stretches you out, and especially loves seeing your hole gaping open to match his thickness. the feeling of pushing your walls apart because of how thick he is is always enough to make him weak at the knees.

he loves when you inflate his ego a little by using two hands to jerk him off rather than one. he especially loves when you use one hand to massage his balls, another sensitive spot of his. seeing you so eager and dedicated to please him will always send his heart pounding.

i like to imagine he has big, thick loads too to match his fat cock... he would definitely love dumping his cum inside you then letting it spill out so he can fuck it back inside again, penetrating you until your entrance is sore and covered in his load.

childe

this man is packing. he’s huge. nothing anyone can say will change my mind. out of this entire boy band group, this man packs the most. even his in game model has been proven to have such a fat cock that his bulge can literally be seen from behind???

it can tear you apart! hell, maybe it could make you bleed if he’s a touch too rough with you. but we all know that’s secretly what he would love to see... his bloodthirst might extend to intercourse too.

despite this, of course he would make sure your comfortable with his size first and would adjust accordingly in normal circumstances. he’s aware of how big he is and doesn’t want to make you feel genuine pain. maybe in other circumstances where he needs to take out his frustrations, he might not be so considerate...

if you gently touch or lick the veins that travel on the underside of his cock he goes a little feral! his veins are his weakness, just imagine the shaky moans he lets out as you tease him by tracing your finger along those veins... god help me

i believe in size kink foul legacy childe supremacy... his cock is already above average in size when he’s his normal self, but when he transforms you often tremble in borderline fear wondering how he could fit inside you. it’s mind boggling how the size difference is humanly possible.

(un?)fortunately, he can’t keep this form up for very long but rest assured he loves seeing the look on your face when he fucks you silly on such a fat cock, even if it’s just for mere moments.

that being said, expect childe to be super cocky about his size. his ego swells whenever you swoon over how big he is and he’s definitely the type of person to use this to his advantage by teasing and pushing your buttons.

zhongli

several sources have stated that rex lapis was able to change and alter his form freely... surely if zhongli could still do this even with his gnosis taken away, he would change his size to your preference if needed.

if you wanted his cock to rip you open, just say the word and he will do so accordingly. but if you’re feeling a little more mellow and wanted things to be gentle, he would gladly alter himself to be average size, or even smaller if you wanted.

but when i say he can alter his form, you best be sure that he can make it so he has two cocks at once. yes i believe in double cock zhongli supremacy... do with that information what you will.

since zhongli isn’t exactly human, his cock doesn’t exactly match that of a human’s either. in his most natural form without any changes being made, his cock is tougher and firmer than a normal human’s muscle. it doesn’t squish easy to the touch, but it’s not completely rock solid as you’d expect, which is quite ironic coming from a geo god.

you notice his veins on his cock, just like the rest of his body, are golden. they only actually show up when he’s reaching his climax where they’ll glow brighter if he’s getting closer to his orgasm. finally, with each pump of cum he lets out, these veins start pulsing with light until they eventually dim when he’s calming down from his high.

weird, huh?

[monocaelia]

tending to their wounds

they cannot evade death. but with you around, they're invincible.

feat. albedo, childe, diluc, kaeya, kazuha, xiao

genre : headcanons, fluff, angst [for xiao and kazuha], hurt/comfort

warnings : blood and injury. death mention. minor cursing.

❀ albedo

it's to no one's surprise that albedo isn't human, meaning he doesn't have the same bodily functions as the others in mondstadt do. his body cannot bleed nor can he feel much pain. that's not to say he can't at all, but a simple prick from a piece of shattered flask can't really do the young alchemist any harm.

flasks breaking or nicking himself while conducting his own research never really phased the alchemist. despite the warnings his assistant gave him about laboratory safety, he didn't need to heed them if the injuries didn't apply to him, did he?

it's safe to say that the chief alchemist is... perplexed to say the least at seeing you worry over him. he wasn't expecting you to come rushing through his laboratory door when you heard the sound of falling glass and nearly climbed over all of his equipment to come to his aid.

"really, you shouldn't have to worry," his gentle voice reassures you, but his attempts to calm you down are futile. instead, albedo is met with your furrowed brows in concentration and your fingers brushing against his as you inspect his invisible wounds.

"yeah well, maybe if you were more careful in your laboratory i wouldn't be here worrying over you, would i?" albedo sighs at your response and decides to let you do as you please to his 'injuries.'

the alchemist's teal eyes follow your movements as you reach for the bandages in the first aid kit and begin to wrap them around his finger tips. he doesn't miss the way your tongue pokes out from between your lips as you concentrate on the task in front of you.

despite not needing to worry much about him, albedo finds it endearing that you care so much about his wellbeing. how much you care about him, how often you check up on him and make sure he never overworks himself. you truly are a caring individual, a ray of warm sunshine in his life.

you meet albedo's gaze when your name leaves his lips, eyes filled with curiosity at what he could possibly want.

"thank you for tending to me." he thanks you with tender smile on his face, his spare hand gently ruffling your hair. the flustered expression on your face is hard to miss, especially when you quickly duck your head down and away from the alchemist.

you stutter out that 'this is nothing!' and continue on wrapping albedo's faux injuries. though, the alchemist finds the way your hands shake as they brush against his skin adorable.

❀ childe

childe is a war criminal, in case you missed it. it's not uncommon to find the young man fighting an entire hoard of enemies by himself. the thrill of battle never seems to be enough for him, as he constantly seeks anything that could satiate his need for exhilaration.

finding scars or fresh injuries on the harbinger is the usual for you, regardless of whether or not they're shallow wounds or deep gashes that gush blood and stain your poor floor. not that childe minds anyways, he sees his battle scars as medals of the many fights he has won and wears them with pride.

but, despite being one of the fatui harbingers and an absolute beast on the battlefield, that doesn't stop you from worrying about his wellbeing.

your brows furrow in concern at the sight of childe in front of you; body worn from using his foul legacy form one too many times in succession and injuries sustained from his earlier fight. he shouldn't have protected you, really you could have protected yourself. and yet...

"you're going to ruin yourself if you keep going into your other form all the time, you know." childe laughs weakly at your lecturing; that's all he can do right now anyways. you catch your lip in between your teeth as you rub a cooling ointment on the harbinger's body. "this isn't funny. you can't just die. then no one would be the eleventh harbinger and you-"

"i would leave you alone?" childe smiles when you send him a glare. his rough hand finds yours, squeezing it lightly in reassurance. there's not a chance in the world that he would succumb to death just yet. childe is still young, and there are many others that he hasn't had the pleasure of fighting against.

and he sure as abyss can’t pass away without saying how he truly feels about you.

you grumble to the snezhnayan that you could've handled it all alone, that you didn't need him to go all berserk on the ruin guards that had surrounded you earlier. instead, childe laughs and places a weak hand on your forearm. "i know, but that was the perfect time to show you just how well i can fight. maybe then, you'll finally accept my feelings."

a white lie, really. even though childe knows that you could've handled it yourself, he acted on instinct back then. the thought of you being harmed in any way sends a chill down the harbinger's spine. he wouldn't forgive himself if he reacted a second too late and you ended up hurt as a consequence.

what's the point of harboring the power of the abyss if he couldn't protect the ones he loved.

you roll your eyes at his answer, choosing to quietly resume cleaning up childe's wounds in hopes that he doesn't say anything more embarrassing. as your fingers brush against the snezhnayan's freckled skin, you don't miss the way he leans towards your touch and the happy hum rumbling from his chest.

❀ diluc

the darknight hero is not one to lose his battles, let alone allow any of his enemies lay a finger on him. trained by the knights and his own father, diluc's fighting style is difficult to intercept and finding a weak spot in his defense is futile. even if his sword is too slow, his fists will be glad to meet those that oppose him.

that isn't to say he doesn't get hurt every now and then. you've caught him with bandages wrapped around his hand, blood soaked gauze around his torso. as long as the job was done, diluc didn't mind the wounds he received in battle.

he isn't used to others tending to his wounds, as nobody really knows he's the darknight hero and protects mondstadt in the middle of the night. so when you catch him in the act of cleaning his wounds and offer to help, he kind of freezes up.

diluc wants to decline your offer, sure that he could finish this up by himself. and besides, he doesn't want to burden you with his consequences so late at night. but he knows you would keep bugging him and complain later that he didn't "love you" or whatever dramatic act you'd be committing in the near future.

it's hard to look at you when you're so close to the red haired vigilante. granted, diluc has always been pretty close with you, seeing as the two of you grew up together and shared most of your memories with one another (and kaeya).

but being physically close to you... is another story. your fingers lightly touching his skin, your face so close to his as you inspect other wounds on his body, your hands roaming the expanse of his chest to remove his shirt in case it hid any other injuries you could have missed.

diluc's hands twitch when you inch even closer to him. if he wanted to, it would take one swift movement to have his lips on yours. one swift movement to hold you in his arms and feel the way your skin melts into his.

but the vigilante has self-control and would rather die than make you uncomfortable.

diluc releases a shaky breath when you finally move away from his body, though it's only a brief moment of respite since you immediately move back into your previous position after grabbing more bandages. absolutely perfect for the poor vigilante.

he clears his throat when your hands slide down his arms to reassure the pressure is enough to keep his wounds from reopening and bleeding out. it is then that you realize what you've been doing to the poor red haired man and how close you've been to him and his body.

"oh? what could you possibly be thinking about, mr. ragnvindr?" you tease, raising an eyebrow and sending diluc a playful smile. you fail to suppress your laughter when he scrunches up his face and turns his face away from you, his ears burning a wonderful shade of bright pink.

"i think it's time for you to leave." shocked, you try and apologize and get him to let you stay a little bit more. the night is still young, and he still has more injuries to be looked at! but diluc pays you no mind.

not like he'd have the heart to actually kick you out of his room anyways.

❀ kaeya

the captain of the calvary isn't one to fight, always looking for people to do his dirty work so he doesn't have to. why bother exerting more energy than you already have when you can make others do it for you? it's more fun that way, anyways.

that doesn't mean kaeya is incapable of fighting. if needed to, the blue haired captain would gladly point his sword at the enemy to keep them at bay or spar a fellow knight. scratches and shallow scrapes are what you mostly see from him.

you aren't expecting to be called into the knights of favonius headquarters and be greeted by the calvary captain battered up and bruised in the infirmary.

"you're squeezing me too hard," kaeya comments nonchalantly, as if he isn't bleeding to death on the bed right now. "you'll cut off circulation in my arm if you keep doing that." you shoot him a glare, but the blue haired captain only laughs at you. you tighten the bandage on his arm.

you refuse to get tangled up in anymore of kaeya's antics. it's all his fault you've aged ten years because of him and his stupid actions and refusing to ask for help despite the mission being bigger than anyone could handle. alone at least. it's not like you don't trust him, but a little extra help isn't bad to have.

your frown deepens when your eyes flit up to stare at the blood soaked shirt covering kaeya's chest. you order him to take it off so you can inspect his injury, which was a mistake on your part.

"oh? shouldn't you ask me on a date first before being this forward?" kaeya's laughter rings around the infirmary seeing your deadpan expression at his joke. maybe you should just leave, just leave this stupid man to bleed to death on this infirmary bed. maybe then you would finally be at peace.

"well. maybe i would have asked you on a date if you weren't so stupid to take this dumb mission alone. you could have died, asshole." kaeya only hums in response, which pisses you off even more. it's like he didn't have a care in the world.

in the midst of your grumblings and cleaning of kaeya's wounds, you miss the tender look he gives you; warm and gentle. the captain finds it nice to have someone care for someone like him after so long.

it wasn’t his fault he wanted to do this alone. well, it was, but it’s hard for kaeya to rely on others and be vulnerable to those around him despite how long he’s known them. his walls are built high, refusing to let anybody in in case he accidentally hurts them in the future.

he wonders if you'd miss him if he disappeared one day, but the way your brows furrow in concern at seeing how bad the gash in his chest confirms his answer.

kaeya’s endearing, warm smile is replaced with the usual smug smirk when you look up to meet his gaze. one day, he hopes he’ll be able to let his walls down around you.

"you know, you're really cute when you worry over me. maybe i should get injured more often." the look of shock at kaeya's comment is evident on your flustered face and it takes everything in him to not laugh and open up his wounds again.

❀ kazuha

kazuha isn't one to easily get injured, well at least seriously injured. he was raised by a prestigious family, trained in the arts of the kaedehara clan. with the help of his prior knowledge of fighting and his keen senses, it's hard to one-up the young man to the point of injury.

that isn't to say he has never sustained any injuries. there have been one too many times that the inazuman traveller has shown up at your door with a couple of scrapes and an apologetic smile on his face.

so, it's a surprise when you find kazuha at your doorstep severely injured and clutching something in his burned hand.

it's quiet between the two of you as your eyes scan kazuha's body for any more injuries and your hands quickly move to tend to his right hand. the skin is burnt, bleeding, and his fingers shake from the injuries it sustained.

you whisper an apology to the inazuman when you gently clean the wounded skin with a warm cloth. he doesn't flinch, dazed eyes still staring off in front of you. it makes you wonder what kazuha went through to be injured this badly. though, seeing as the only serious injury was his right hand, you assumed it wasn't from a fight.

"kazuha... what happened to you?" your words are gentle, afraid your voice would scare the inazuman traveller in front of you. kazuha doesn't respond and instead tightens the grip he has on your hand that's bandaging him. his hand is shaking, and you don't realize he's crying until you feel the wet teardrops on your skin.

ruby eyes glazed with tears meet your own when your eyes flick up to confirm that he was indeed crying.

"tomo..." the crack in his voice shatters your heart and you find yourself pulling kazuha into your arms. his own circle around you and his hands grip onto the back of your shirt as he buries his face into your shoulder.

kazuha's body shakes as he sobs at the loss of his friend. he must have held it in until he got to the safety of your home. you were always his safe haven; coming over so you could tend his light wounds and provide a roof over his head if he was passing by your village.

and yet all you can do now is hold him until the storm inside his heart passes by.

❀ xiao

being in pain or having many injuries litter the expanse of his skin isn't unusual for xiao. he's an adeptus whose sole purpose is to serve rex lapis and protect the citizens of liyue, even if it meant throwing his life away.

even then, sustaining larger, more painful wounds didn't make the adeptus bat an eye. despite how horrible it sounds, xiao is used to it all and takes each hit and laceration that comes his way without blinking an eye.

when karmic debt constantly takes a toll against your health and death is the only solution to reaching true peace, it's hard to care about the state of your own wellbeing.

so imagine xiao's surprise when he shows up at the wangshu inn battered and bruised from dealing with a hoard of monsters and seeing you standing in the yaksha's usual spot, waiting for him with a frown etched into your face.

nimble fingers work deftly against xiao's body, quickly cleaning up the lacerations on the adeptus' chest and the scrapes that cover his arms. xiao releases a hiss from the sting of the medicine and you apologize under your breath.

"i knew you would end up like this." your words come out harsher than you intend to. the adeptus doesn't respond. as long as he was the only casualty to come out of this, as long as the innocent lives of liyuens were protected, as long as you were safe behind the walls of the wangshuu inn, it didn't matter how badly his body was injured.

"i just... i just wished you weren't so careless, xiao." the way your voice breaks doesn't go unheard by the yaksha. his eyes snap forward, but your head is tilted down as your shaky fingers worked their way around xiao's torso. "you're always fighting as if no one cared if you died or disappeared one day."

xiao doesn't get it. he doesn't understand why you care about him so much. a being fated to suffer until his dying days are over, one cursed with karmic debt and forced to carry the burdens of the innocent lives he took in his past.

no one should care about him. a monster with blood on his hands.

but here you are, shedding tears for an adeptus who didn't deserve it. the sole yaksha who is fated to succumb to the sweet embrace of death at any given moment.

and yet, despite knowing he doesn't deserve your gentle touch brushing over his wounds, the young adeptus lifts your face with a gloved finger and brushes away the tears that flow down your cheeks. he longs to continue holding you, to feel your skin against his. you're his temporary solace from the karmic debt that hangs over his heart.

an apology slips past xiao's lips, and you cry harder, calling him 'stupid' for almost dying out there. you bury yourself in his chest and he hugs you, afraid that if he let go, you would be nothing but a dream.

[fatuispolaris-archive]

misc headcanons (mostly regarding childe’s family + some abyss/post-abyss stuff). under the cut because it’s pretty long ( and also has some cw for violence/blood/animal death etc.)

- childe grew up poor, and helped his dad and older brothers with fishing duties. since he’s a harbinger now though, he sends most of the money home so his family never has to struggle or go hungry again.

- childe has 6 siblings (3 older, 3 younger) plus both of his parents. he also has a large extended family, but none of them talk to him at all anymore. his grandparents do interact with him a bit, but only because he is their grandson. the rest of his family (and most of the people of morepesok, for that matter) avoid him like the plague because of everything he did after returning from the abyss. 

- childe’s siblings (from youngest to oldest): teucer [7], anthon [14], tonia [16], anatoli [23]*, anya [24], and aleksei [26]*  

- his young siblings all adore him, anya is sympathetic but distant (she was the one that found him along with their mom), and anatoli and aleksei just straight up hate him. aleksei will at least act nice with him though when their whole family is gathered, but he has not yet let childe meet his wife and kids. anatoli literally wants to murder him (childe gouged his eye out upon returning from the abyss) and fights with him every time he sees him. 

- his older siblings, parents and the rest of his family are distant because they know he’s not the same kid. his mother and anya have hope that maybe one day they’ll get their sweet little ajax again, but his older brothers, father, and the rest of his family consider that boy long gone

- since childe was only gone for 3 days in regular teyvat time, a lot of the villagers think he got possessed by some sort of demon/evil spirit that made him go crazy, which is not that far off from the truth. the abyss had devastating effects on him, and it’s definitely corrupted his psyche. in addition to this, he feels a bit more of his humanity slip away every time he uses his foul legacy transformation, so he refrains from using it because of that (on top of the strain it puts on his body). 

- following childe’s return, he started off “small” by killing other family’s pets to sate his bloodlust. no one knew it was him at first because he’d do it in the dead of night, but one day his neighbors found him in their backyard eating their freshly-slaughtered horse raw. this is when the accusations about him being possessed started rolling about. all of his old friends stayed away from him, and people in the village openly whispered and ran away from him. he got mad and kept gettiing into fights with people, almost killing quite a few of them. he almost severed the hand of some man that threw a rock at him. he was gone for days at a time and would return home covered in blood, and it absolutely devastated his mother. when he got into a fight with anatoli and cut out his eye, that’s when childe’s dad decided enough was enough and shipped him off to the fatui. 

childe’s fathers words still plague his mind.

“you’re no son of mine. you’re a monster that killed him and took my boy’s place.”

- when he first enrolled in that fatui’s bootcamp, he told them he didn’t have a name. they called him kid/that child. he was the youngest of the group he enlisted with, but he was at the top of his class. he’d almost beat some of his commanding officers to death, and it was then that pulcinella realized his potential. in a year, he’d become a harbinger receiving the codename tartaglia. he is also often called childe as the youngest of the harbingers, and he finds it fitting since he was called “kid” for a long time. 

- no one calls him ajax anymore, save for the tsaritsa on occasion. he’s pretty much dropped the name entirely, because he doesn’t view himself as the person he used to be, either. his older family members don’t refer to him by name, and the younger ones all call him big brother. 

- despite how his family most of his family has shunned him, he still loves them all. he stays away because he is ashamed, but he hopes they know that he’s sorry. he doesn’t think he has the capacity to love much at all anymore, but he knows he loves them.  ** anatoli and aleksei are names/ideas i got from the artist msnz_04 on twitter. 

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

I don't think I've ever seen this particular meet up around, and if you've written something like this please kindly point me to it, but...

I'm dying to know. How would Legacy react to the other Harbingers?

We kinda know Ajax's opinion on them from voice lines, but I really wanna know what Moth TM thinks

And, if you wanna go the sagau route too, how would he feel being in a Harbinger only team? (Aka Childe, Scara/Wanderer and Arlecchino, in the present moment, but let's pretend we have a fourth one of them already)

hoohoohoo i got you, this is going to be a long one so bear with me mothlings!!

Director: Pierro is suspicious to Foul Legacy, he smells like the Abyss, yet not. the stars in his eyes match the ones in Legacy's glittering wings, but their light is from Teyvat, not the otherworldly glow from beneath this land. Legacy doesn't like it, the feel of being so close to home but with something obviously wrong that he simply can't put his claw on

First: Capitano is a pillar of strength, someone both Childe and Foul Legacy admire wholeheartedly- but Legacy also sees his nobility, the way he treats even his lowest level agents with respect. he aspires to be like that one day, someone people can look up to and expect kindness in return, so even Foul Legacy will give the First Harbinger a small, polite bow

Second: Legacy detests Dottore with all of his heart. not only does Childe have younger siblings, but Dottore has also attempted to rope him into experiments on his Abyssal half. Foul Legacy hates being treated like a thing, like just a feral animal, and that's not even mentioning what he fears the Doctor could do to you. Childe has to hold him back from growling viciously whenever he passes Dottore in the hall

Third: Columbina is strange, but Legacy is also strange! she's unsettling, yes, but she never tries to harm him or Childe- unless the latter riles her up enough to fight. sometimes when Foul Legacy is particularly homesick for you, nations away from Snezhnaya, he'll listen to her eerie singing as she sits nearby, not paying him any mind at all

Fourth: Legacy regards Arlecchino with both fear and respect. she's cordial enough, keeping her operations quiet and training her children to be the next set of Fatui soldiers, much like how Ajax became Tartaglia. the Knave terrifies Foul Legacy with her calm ruthlessness, but as long as she doesn't raise a finger towards you, he won't do anything

Fifth: Pulcinella is a curious case, treating Childe like a grandson and regarding his Abyssal half with kindness as well. it's a welcome change, and yet... Legacy can't help but feel like he isn't completely sincere. there's the barest undertone of a lie when he tells Childe about the other Harbingers, and Legacy watches the information with a care, suspicious eye

Sixth: ERROR. DATA NOT FOUND.

Seventh: Childe doesn't get the chance to interact with Sandrone that often, so neither does Foul Legacy. but he's very curious about what she does, always tinkering away in her lab- it's less foreboding than Dottore's set of rooms, at least. once she begrudgingly allowed him to watch her work, and needless to say her robots consider Foul Legacy their friend now

Eighth: Signora wasn't Childe or Legacy's favorite coworker when she was alive- they're not happy that she's dead, but it is somewhat of a relief to not have Childe bite his tongue with a vengeance whenever some snide comment slipped from her mouth. still, Legacy almost wishes he knew a bit more, having seen her stare longingly out the window at the silent snow all too often- he knows that longing. it's the type he feels when he misses you

Ninth: Legacy doesn't know much about Pantalone, apart from his love of wealth. he's an elegant man, to be sure, someone who can simultaneously keep his composure while also being entirely condescending. but Childe has a habit of buying you trinkets and gifts during his travels, so he's still grateful for the funds the Regrator provides

Tenth: ???

Foul Legacy wouldn't mind being in a team with other Harbingers- he knows they can't hurt him, at least not directly, and it seems to make the Creator so happy. he basks in your warm words, your loving attention, purring happily whenever he hears your sweet voice praise him- but only when his teammates aren't watching. he just knows that the Wanderer, mysterious as he is, will mock him for it, and Arlecchino always seems to know what's going on even when she's not present. his fourth teammate always seems to switch; he likes it best when it's Sandrone or Capitano. Legacy knows how the rest of them feel, though, how the Wanderer lowers his hat or how Arlecchino's lips quirk when they hear your compliments- the Creator has the adoration of them all

[meili-sheep]

Now let’s put Childe in some pain hehe~

Childe absolutely cannot sleep in complete darkness, he has to have a nightlight, lamp or candle on no matter what. If he is in complete darkness he will have a major panic attack and flashbacks from falling into the abyss. Diluc even makes sure he has candles with him at all times so he can use his vision to light them if the power were to go out at night.

After using his foul legacy form, Childe‘s body is in extreme amounts of pain and he gets sick and very exhausted and is basically bedridden for a week or two. Diluc has had to take time off from work to be with Childe due to how sick he gets. Sometimes Diluc will be suffering from chronic pain flareups himself and he forced himself through it to help Childe. However, if he is too weak he will just pass out beside Childe in bed.

So Diluc already had a fondness for Blue Lamp Grass. But now, when Child is staying over, he always makes sure that there is freshly cut Lamp grass in their room. And Diluc's a pretty light sleeper, so he'll wake up at the highest twitch from Childe. So he'll instantly wake up and know what's wrong. Diluc is not good at showing affection. And he's particularly awkward with touching.

But he knows when Childe needs it. So he'd find Childe's hand, gently take it and just light any nearby candles. Or just keep a steady flame going to comfort Childe well keep a tight hold on his hand. Childe often will cling to Diluc, and then Diluc will start singing and rubbing his back well, keeping the light going.

As for his Legacy Injuries. Diluc would hardly let his own pain get in the way of taking care of Childe. He is pretty strict on Childe using Foul Legacy and only if there is no other way. But If it happens, he's wholly devoted to helping Childe recover. Definitely takes days off (to everyone's surprise). Tries to make Childe his favorite meals (Recipes courtesy of Childe's mom). And Makes sure he's got lots of fluids and that he has everything he could want or need. And will spend his day sitting at Childe's bedside, just hanging out and watching over him. If he's having a lousy day, he'll actually be good about taking his medication and having a bucket at his side if the nausea is too much. But does his fucking best to push through the pain to help Childe. Cause that's more important right now.

Childe still can still tell Diluc has a flare-up, though, and will often whine for cuddles. Cause A) he probably wanted them to start, and B) he wants to help and isn't strong enough, and C) wants to give Diluc a little reward for taking such good care of him.

Adelinde is always in the background on alert with these 2, though. And she often takes care of the little things if 1 or both is down. It honestly warms her heart when she goes to check on her Master and sees him and Childe cuddling in bed, just enjoying a good rest. So she's a good maid and makes sure they have water and food when they wake up.

[watatsumiis]

"Darling, you're the most gentle person I know." Foul Legacy x GN!Reader

Inspired by a prompt from @sh1-n0bu !!

Heads up for a passing mention of injury (a scratch on the cheek). Foul Legacy struggles with words in his abyssal form.

Childe, despite all of his elegance and prowess in battle, is far from what one would call 'coordinated' in his day to day life. 

This seems to shine through even more when he's in his 'Foul Legacy' form. Though he doesn't mean any harm (to you, at least), you often end up with little nicks and cuts from his razor-sharp claws, as well as bumps and bruises from him accidentally knocking you over or holding you too tightly. 

You accepted after the first few times that this was simply how it was going to be when Childe managed to trap himself in this abyssal form. You'd resigned yourself to the occasional injury, especially knowing how much anguish being like this caused him. 

Even now, as he's staring forlornly at the long, shallow cut along your cheek, still burning and tingling in its freshness, you don't really have much to say about it all. It was an accident, you understand. You've already got the first aid kit to clean yourself up. 

Foul Legacy plonks onto the floor by your feet, a long puff of air escaping him in a sigh that sounds almost comically like a tired old dog, followed by an odd, guttural crackling sound from somewhere in the back of his throat. 

You recognise it as a noise of distress, and react accordingly, even as you're still dabbing your cheek clean with a cloth.

"Hey. Stop that." You chide gently. 

Childe tucks his chin in, broad shoulders hunching in a defensive manner as he pointedly looks away. You hear the gentle tapping of his claws against one another as he holds them close to his chest, curled so they're out of the way. "I hurt you." You barely manage to catch the tinny whisper.

"It was an accident." You reassure him warmly. "I'm not mad." You hurriedly dab your cheek clean and apply a band-aid, wrangling out a crooked smile to demonstrate that everything is okay. "See? All better." 

"I…I always…" He lets out a little 'hff-hff' and shakes his head. 

“Hush.” You tell him sternly, reaching out to give him a pat on the head, right between the arcing horns that jut out from the mane of fuzz there. 

“I…I can never…” he chokes on the words, shying away from your touch as if he’s the one who has been hurt. “I can’t not.” he tucks his chin in and worries at the scarf around his neck with his claws.

You sigh gently, pityingly, as you bend your knees and crouch down beside him. It’s almost comical, when a creature this large is so curled in on himself. “Hey.” You tilt your head to the side and wait until he meets your gaze. “It’s not your fault, okay?”

“All I do is hurt people.” He mumbles, about to look down at the ground once more. 

“No.” Before he can turn his gaze off of you, you reach out and grasp his chin between your fingertips. The almost metallic texture of his face-slash-mask is cool and smooth against your fingers. He lets out a little chrrr. “You’re wrong.” You tell him gently, hoping the conviction on your face will communicate just how serious you’re being.

Though he may be clumsy, especially in this abyssal form, Childe is always kind, soft and caring to those he loves. You’ve been around him more than long enough to have witnessed firsthand how careful he is when handling things that are delicate or alive. It’s inevitable that he may accidentally scratch something up every now and then.

It’s hard for Childe to express emotions through his face when he’s like this, but you’re familiar enough with his abyssal form’s body language to know that he’s slowly calming down, latching onto your words. He lifts his big hands a little and you take them carefully in yours.

“Darling, you’re the most gentle person I know.” You tell him, and it’s nothing but the truth.

Please don't repost, steal, copy or otherwise plagarise my writing! This includes posting translations to other sites.

[versadies]

Hiya! Could I request the reader being childe’s younger sister? She’s like the second oldest so about 4-5 years behind him and maybe some comfort with him? He’s a big comfort charater for me and my older brother has to go back to college soon once it opens up again from COVID and I’m just looking for some sibling comfort 🙈💕

—HOME IS WHERE YOU ARE, a childe hc scenario

penpal: i’m not good at making comfort hcs but i hope this is comforting enough for you! (sorry if this is too short woshsjdhdj)

warning/s: spoilers on chapter 1 archon quest (all acts) and childe’s story quest, swearing (3 times)

sypnosis: saying goodbye to childe before he leaves is truly painful, worrying that something bad will happen to your brother during his mission. despite that, there’s nothing that can make you happier than seeing your brother returning home safe and sound. (alt title: hc on childe coming home with teucer)

note: reader is female in this one and i changed some stuff on childe’s story chapter (for plot purposes). im not exactly sure on how long the liyue archon is but i’ll give it at least three or less weeks.

-> you can never get used to childe leaving to another nation for a mission.

-> “don’t worry sis,” childe said, trying to assure you that he’ll be safe in his mission in liyue. “i’ll be back before you know it.. you’re a strong girl, you can handle on your own without me, yeah?” you nodded in response, still giving him a hug in tears.

-> “just please promise me you won’t use your foul legacy much— you know how bad it can be after using it.” you pleaded.

-> childe nodded and look down to see you. “i can’t promise you that but i’ll try. promise me you’ll keep an eye on our family while i’m gone?”

-> you nodded. “it’s a pinky promise.”

-> “you make a pinkie promise, you keep it all your life. you break a pinkie promise, i’ll throw you on the ice. the cold will kill the pinkie that once betrayed your friend,” you recited.

-> “—the frost will freeze your tongue off so you never lie again.” childe finished, causing you two to interlock your pinkies and swore your promises.

-> “master childe,” one of the fatui agents called out, causing you and childe to stop talking for a moment and look at the fatui agent. “it’s time to leave. i shall escort you around the boat.” he said, bowing at childe.

-> childe sighs and shrugs the agent off. “alright then, i’ll meet you by the entrance when i’m done.” he said to the agent, causing the agent to nod in response and disappear once more.

-> “i’ll send you as many letters as i can as usual. let me know if something bad happen that requires my presence, alright?” you nodded and gave your brother one last hug before he leaves.

-> “see you next time, childe.”

-> that was at least three weeks ago.

-> if you would have the chance to go with him, you would. however, you knew your family needs you. you didn’t mind, of course— you care deeply for your family as much as childe does.

-> as promised by your brother, he does send letters often. when you’re done with taking care of your home, you’d go out to the docks and wait for his letters to arrive.

-> his letters are usually just about his adventures in liyue and how he misses you and the family. the only time where one of his letters mention something new was when he informed you about how he met a traveler, aether, who was famous for saving mondstadt from stormterror and liyue from osial’s wrath.

-> right now, you’re making breakfast for your siblings— though you couldn’t help but feel like something is off.

-> “tonia?” you called out your sister as you focus on cooking your meals. suddenly you hear panicked noises from where your siblings are, causing you to stop cooking for a moment. “tonia? guys? what’s going on over there?” you yelled.

-> suddenly tonia and your brother, anthon, showed up in the kitchen, both breathing heavily from running. “y/n, the others were playing outside and... and,” you turn off the stoves for a moment, walking over to your sister in concern. “what’s wrong, tonia? did they get hur—”

-> “it’s teucer, he’s gone!”

-> oh shi—

-> “oh my archons, where could he be?!” you panicked as you walk around the city with your sister tonia at night. “didn’t i tell you guys to always keep an eye on each other?”

-> it has been at least a few hours since you found out about teucer being missing. your family immediately agreed to each other that you and tonia would look for teucer around the city while they stay at home.

-> “still no sign of him?” you asked, taking a short break from running around in exhaustion. tonia shook her head, sighing.

-> “no... i’m really sorry, y/n— i only took them to the docks because they wanted to see the boats and before i knew it, teucer is gone!” your eyes widens at tonia’s explanation. “wait, you took them by the docks?”

-> tonia nodded, covering her face with her hands in regret. “i know it’s dangerous and all but we couldn’t help but show teucer around! he wanted to see if ajax was at least coming—” before your younger sibling could explain more, you immediately grabbed her hand and ran off towards to the docks.

-> “if we ask the people around the docks then maybe they’ll know of teucer’s whereabouts. if we’re... if we’re lucky enough then maybe he’s still in snezhnaya.” you analyzed, trying to prevent yourself from panicking even more at the thought of your little brother going to another nation alone, still running off to the docks with your sister and try not to accidentally hit people on your way.

-> as you and tonia arrived, you started looking for teucer.

-> however, before you could start walking, you suddenly felt small arms wrapped around your lower body, causing you to flinch in surprise.

-> “y/n!” your eyes widened at the familiar voice of your younger brother and look down, crying out in relief at the sight of teucer. “oh thank goodness you’re okay!” you exclaimed, kneeling down to his height and embrace him.

-> “where did you go?! we were looking all over for you and you gave your family a heart attack!”

-> “well... what happened was i saw a boat that looked like it was selling toys, so obviously i thought childe was on board. sadly i didn’t see him so then i got off and walked and walked until i met mr. cyclops!” teucer explained with a smile.

-> you felt like you want to slap yourself at what teucer said. he went to another nation for almost the whole day and met a ruin guard?!

-> “i think it’s best if you should stop explaining what happened before you give y/n a heart attack, teucer.” tonia whispered to the child, who looks at the two of you in confusion.

-> “don’t worry, y/n!” teucer reassured you. “i wasn’t alone the whole time— i met brother and mr. cyclops!”

-> “yeah, there’s no need to worry for teucer so much, not when his big brother is here to protect him.” wait—

-> you gasped at the familiar voice of the stranger chiming in to your conversation, causing you to look behind and see your brother.

-> “childe?”

-> lo and behold stands your brother, who is standing front of you with a grin. “what? aren’t you supposed to be giving me a— woah, calm down!” childe laughs as he stumbled from you tackling him with a hug, crying in joy.

-> “you bastard, you didn’t tell me you were on your way home!” you cried out.

-> childe slowly hugs you back and pat your back comfortingly. “hey, it’s okay. it’s okay,” he said as you continue crying.

-> “i’m home now.”

[merakiui]

I think it’s pretty cool of u write about dark themes like mental abuse etc👏🏼 can I request Venti with gn reader who have been living with strict af parents who have never let them be themselves or show any negative emotions? So when they move to Mondstadt and finally have freedom they’re like “?? Can I? Are you sure?” (Sorry if this is too long/specific)

Venti with a Reader who has Strict Parents

cw: strict parents

Freedom. That’s what you need.

You’ve always been an adventurous soul who enjoys exploring new places with friends, but your parents always disapprove of this hobby.

Arguments aren’t uncommon in your household, but they always end under the same veil: your parents tell you it’s unbecoming of a person to shout and talk back to their elders and you’ll never be able to grow into a suitable adult if you continue your rebellious streak.

You’ve been told countless times to act properly. Stop going out with your friends to look for treasure around Mondstadt. Stop dressing in rags when you clearly have nice clothes at home. And, most of all, stop frequenting those rowdy, no-good taverns!

While you are old enough to drink and work—basically old enough to be your own person—your parents refuse to let you move out. They think it’s for the best. If you were living on your own, who knows what crazy things you would get up to! And they can’t have their child stain their name or legacy with foul mannerisms and silly hobbies.

You meet Venti in Diluc’s tavern. Having seen him frequent this establishment before, you find it funny when Diluc’s always so quick to kick the bard out when he can’t cough up the Mora to pay for the extensive bill.

From what you’ve seen, he’s definitely not the type of person your parents would approve of. He’s a bard, after all, and your parents aren’t exactly fond of what they like to call ‘jobless, noisy rodents with nothing but time on their hands.’

It’s harsh criticism, but you’ve met plenty of bards before and most of them were genuine and kind. And they shared a passion for singing and weaving tales into their music—something you find to be absolutely charming.

Venti isn’t any different from that, so when you offer to pay for one of his drinks the friends you are with get eager at once, inviting him to drink with the lot of you. And thus a friendship blooms.

Ever since that act of kindness, you’ve started visiting that tavern more often, curious about that strange bard. He’s usually there 90% of the time and you end up striking a few conversations with him.

He talks in lyrical rhymes when he feels like it and you find that to be interesting, despite how tiring it can get trying to understand some of those poetic lines.

Somehow you manage to become close friends with him and it isn’t long before the two of you are hanging out outside of the tavern, finding new places to visit within Mondstadt. Your parents don’t know anything about him and that’s the way you intend to keep it.

So when Venti asks you to go wind-gliding with him in a part of Mondstadt that’s way too far from home—farther than you’ve ever gone before—you have trouble agreeing.

You’ve always listened to your parents, but now you’re reconsidering. If they found out, you’d probably get into a lot of trouble. They might even prohibit you from seeing your friends or even going out altogether!

Venti notices your sudden lack of enthusiasm and explains that if you don’t feel up for it you shouldn’t force yourself to do it. Besides, he’s very happy spending time with you like this! You don’t always have to go somewhere in order to have fun.

“This is the city of freedom, after all! Live a little!” he reminds you with a cheery grin.

It doesn’t feel like freedom to you because you’ve been trapped under the harsh rules constructed by your parents.

But you want to live your life by your own rules, so maybe moving to a another part of Mondstadt is just what you need. You consider living with a friend or even with Venti himself, and it takes a while before you can actually work your way up to that milestone.

Once you’ve moved out, having ignored every tongue-lashing from your parents for however many months it took to save and pack and actually find a suitable living space, you’re beyond relieved. Sure, your parents will nag you about it until the end of your days, but this is the start of your new life.

And Venti’s very glad to see that extra pep in your step now that you’ve managed to feel freedom for what it truly is. Now the two of you can hop from tavern to tavern, drunkenly sing in the streets, and wind-glide to your hearts’ content without having to worry about making your parents cross.

Venti’s going to make sure you have the best time in the city of freedom, and you’ll never have to feel tied down by your parents’ rules ever again.

[bytheangell]

Hi!!! If you still accept requests could you do a fic with Gabriel and Christopher Lightwood? Matbe when he was little? I think that when he found out his second child was going to be a boy woukd have been impctful as what he had to bear with his own father

I Think I’ve Seen This Film Before (And I Didn’t Like the Ending) (Read on AO3)

Gabriel isn’t sure where the sudden feeling of anxiousness comes from after Cecily has their second child, a boy they name Christopher. He hadn’t been this nervous when they had Anna, and he hadn’t been particularly worried leading up to the birth… but now that Christopher is here Gabriel can tell that something is different this time.

He just can’t quite place what that something is.

It isn’t until he’s holding Christopher one night, allowing his son’s tiny hands to explore and pull at pieces of his clothing with wide-eyed curiosity, that Cecily says something that makes it all click.

“He’s going to idolize you, I can tell,” Cecily says the words with a smile, obviously meaning them as a compliment.

Instead of smiling back, Gabriel blanches. The realization comes immediately

“I don’t want him to.”

Cecily frowns. “What?”

Gabriel shakes his head back and forth emphatically. It’s suddenly very obvious why he’s felt different with Christopher, and honestly, he isn’t sure why it took him this long to piece together.

“I don’t want him to,” he repeats.

“Whyever not?” To her credit, Cecily looks confused, but not upset.

“I idolized my father,” Gabriel says, the words a mere whisper.

And there it is. The reason Christopher is different is that he’s a son: a boy, who will turn into a young man meant to take after his father. To learn from him. To grow up and follow in his footsteps.

Except everything Gabriel’s experienced of how a father raises a son is selfishness, deceit, and self-indulgence. It’s raising a child to serve and reflect your own interests - a name to carry a legacy. What if he’s just like his father? That’s nothing to idolize. That isn’t--

“You’re not Benedict, Gabriel,” Cecily says gently, her words cutting through his quickly spiraling thoughts. She walks over to place a hand on his arm, her expression kind as she glances between him and their son, her smile soft and reassuring. “You’re a good person and a wonderful father. Just look at Anna.”

“She has you to look up to,” Gabriel points out.

“And so will Christopher. But that doesn’t matter, because she still looks at you like you hung the stars in the sky just for her, and rightly so.”

“I don’t want to make the same mistakes he did. He raised us to be heirs, not individuals. I clung to that for so long…”

Cecily knows about the sort of man Benedict Lightwood was, before he wasn’t a man at all. Gabriel told her most of what she didn’t hear on her own because he wanted her to know exactly what she was getting into when they started seeing one another romantically - but Cecily always took it in stride. She always supported him and every difficult step he took away from his father’s legacy.

“And then you let it go when it mattered most,” she reminds him. “If you won’t believe in yourself, then believe in me. Christopher is going to turn out just fine - because of you, not in spite of you.”

Gabriel looks down at Christopher, such a tiny bundle in his arms, and nods slowly. “I won’t let you down, Christopher. I promise.”

---

It takes a while for Gabriel to find a sense of balance with raising Christopher, often trying so intensely to not be like Benedict that he isn’t quite himself, either. But he gets there eventually, stepping into his own in ways he never imagined possible before.

He’s doing well, until the moment he isn’t.

It’s a bad day. One of those days were little things seem to go wrong one after another, mostly minor inconveniences until inevitably one of them becomes the tipping point for a proper explosion of the frustration that’s been building all day.

Unfortunately, that final straw comes in the form of Christopher coming home with violently green skin less than an hour before they’re due to set off for a formal dinner in Idris. Gabriel is upset enough when he thinks it’s another one of Christopher’s experiments gone wrong, but something in him snaps when he finds out it was actually a spell gone wrong from a warlock girl Christopher had been playing with, one he met in the Shadow Market the other day.

“It’s bad enough Tatiana’s stirring up trouble again, and now you’re going to show up looking like this and positively reeking of magic! Must you spend your free time consorting with Downworlders?!”

“The spell was harmless! She wouldn’t hurt me, father,” Christopher says.

“I don’t care how harmless the spell was, it’s how it looks, don’t you see?”

But of course, Christopher doesn’t see, because he’s Christopher. He’s trusting to a fault, and too eager to see the good in people that he never stops to question whether or not they may have ulterior motivations.

“I’ll tell the people at the dinner what happened, once I explain I’m sure-”

“No!” Gabriel feels an instinctive panic at the idea of anyone finding out what happened, putting him even more on edge. “You will not tell anyone what happened. In fact, I don’t want you spending time with that warlock girl anymore.”

“But James-”

“I don’t care what James does. He isn’t my son - he isn’t a Lightwood! People expect certain things of us, Christopher, and we need to do better!” Gabriel is only vaguely aware that his voice is rising and his words are turning sharper.

“What does being a Lightwood have to do with anything?!” Christopher asks.

“It has to do with everything!” Gabriel snaps, and then realizes what he’s doing.

Christopher looks upset and a little shaken, and it’s obvious that he hadn’t expected this sort of reaction from his father. Gabriel catches a reflection of his face in the glass of a curio cabinet and sees more of his father in himself than he ever has before.

Christopher turns and stalks to his room without another word, just as Cecily comes in after hearing the commotion.

“What was all that?” She asks, brows furrowed.

“I-” Gabriel begins, but words fail him at the moment. He realizes he’s a bit shaken up as well - he’s never fought with Christopher before, not like that.

“I messed up, Cece.” Gabriel looks down the hall after his son with a weight in his chest. “I said things I shouldn’t have. I’ve just been under so much pressure lately, and he came home green for Raziel’s sake, and I…” Gabriel sighs, long and heavy.

“You took it out on him.”

It isn’t a question, so at least he doesn’t have to answer it out loud.

“I’ll talk to him later. I should go to this dinner, would you mind staying home with them?” Gabriel knows better than to think Anna will come with him after he’s upset Christopher - she’s fiercely protective of him in all the best ways.

“Of course. Go put in your appearance, I’ll handle things here.”

“Tell him I said I’m sorry,” Gabriel adds, turning to leave.

Cecily shakes her head. “You tell him yourself when you get back.”

He will. He absolutely will.

---

Once he’s in Idris, Gabriel can’t shake his foul mood. It doesn’t take long for Gideon to call him out on it.

“I shouted at Christopher. I told him,” Gabriel huffs. “That we have to hold ourselves to a different standard because we’re Lightwoods.”

“You’re not wrong. You and I both know we’re going to be undoing Father’s damage for the rest of our lives.”

“Are you ever afraid you’re too much like him?” “ Gabriel asks, unable to help himself.

Gideon shrugs. “He wasn’t all bad, you know. He did love us, for what that’s worth in the end. He never wanted us to want for anything, and he always pushed us to be the best versions of ourselves. Those wouldn’t be the worst traits to emulate.”

It’s a fair point. Gabriel is so focused on not turning into the monster his father became that he overlooked the parts of their childhood that were good.

“It’s just, sometimes I see him in myself when I lose my temper and… honestly, it frightens me. It’s like I blink and suddenly all the progress I’ve made all these years is just gone.”

“If all that progress were gone, you wouldn’t be having this conversation with me now,” Gideon points out. “One mistake doesn’t undo years of good. Not if you fix it instead of letting it consume you.”

Some of the tension Gabriel’s felt since he yelled at Christopher eases ever-so-slightly, and he manages a small smile.

“Thanks. I think I needed to hear that.”

“I can’t take all the credit - it’s something Sophie told me once. Guess it stuck,” Gideon admits. “Now get out of here and go home. I’ll cover with the others.”

---

Gabriel leaves Idris early to make sure he’s home before Christopher falls asleep. He goes straight for his son’s room, surprised by the slight nervousness he feels. But that’s good, he reminds himself. It means he cares, and not just about himself, but about what really matters.

“Christopher, are you awake? May I come in?”

There’s a short pause, and Gabriel wonders if he’s too late and will have to wait until morning. Then he hears soft shuffling noises before the door swings open.

“I’m sorry-” Christopher starts immediately, obviously expecting a lecture, but Gabriel holds up a hand to stop him.

“No, I’m sorry. I’m not always right, Christopher. And I need you to understand that. I don’t want you to grow up blindly following in my footsteps, okay? You’re allowed to question me. And you’re allowed to tell me if you think I’m wrong - because I might be. I just might not always see it.”

“You were wrong to be mad that I’m spending time with Downworlders,” Christopher says slowly, as if testing whether or not he’s supposed to actually question his father or if that bit was just a trap to see if he would.

“I was,” Gabriel agrees. “The unsupervised magic could be dangerous and that’s something we’ll have to talk about, but not tonight. Tonight I just need you to know that I don’t want you to be different, or better, or anything other than your perfectly curious, kind self. I love you, Christopher.”

“I love you too.”

This isn’t the first mistake Gabriel’s made as a parent, and he’s certain it won’t be the last. He’s trying to be better than his father before him. Sometimes he fails, sometimes he succeeds, but every time he learns from his mistakes and picks himself up to try again… and he’s finally starting to realize with the love, forgiveness, and encouragement of his family, that he doesn’t have to be perfect so long as he’s trying to be better.