#chezapocalypse

[zagenta]

.

[hellsyeschezapocalypse]

Don’t call it a comeback...

https://twitter.com/thelindsayellis/status/871865777732714496

“Have some very exciting @ChezApocalypse news coming down the pike, stay tuned! #TheResurrection“

[anissapierce]

Both Lindsey & kyle (of chezapocalypse fame) had interludes in recent videos of passing the mic over to queer black folks to speak on stuff tht didn't pertain to then n god I luv the fact that I feel like I've been growing w them ?

[uneekisat]

Presenting “Todd in the Shadows - En Español”

So, I made this during my free time to test my translating skills. What this is a transcript of music reviewer Todd in the Shadow’s first ever review, “’Down’ by Jay Sean” translated into Spanish. There’s a whole lot of copies of popular internet videos out there with subtitles for people from other countries. I figured if there was someone out there who wanted to make one for this video, I’d offer this up to help. I’m a fan of Todd, so I’d to help spread his videos around the around the world.

Here’s a couple of notes:

I’m from Puerto Rico. If my spanish doesn’t sound right to people from other Hispanic countries, that’s probably why. I’m no Spanish major. I’m using what my parents taught me.

As you probably know, translation is not always a perfect process. There are several issues that come up where things were going to get lost. Specifically, I’m worried that the humor won’t play well, since a lot of Todd’s jokes involve sarcasm and understatement. Here’s hoping I’m wrong.

I didn’t translate all the song lyrics that you hear in the video. I figured it was only necessary to know the lyrics that he’s analyzing, since those are the only ones relevant to the review.

Hello, friends.

Hola, amigos.

Uh, if you'll just give me a moment, I'd like to indulge in one of my favorite pastimes,...

Eh, si ustedes solo me dejan un momento, Me gustaría complacer en uno de mis pasatiempos favoritos,...

..overanalyzing cheap pop songs. 

..sobre-analizando canciones de pop barata.

So, uh, there's one song I'd like to look at in particular. You may have heard it. 

Entonces, hay una canción que yo quiero mirar en particular. Ustedes lo 

pueden haber escuchado.

It's called, Jay Sean's "Down".

Se llama "Down" de Jay Sean.

Now um, maybe you don't pay attention to the pop charts, but I do,...

Ahora, quizás usted no pone atención a las listas de éxitos, pero yo si,..

..and this song is everywhere.

..y esta cancion esta por todas las partes.

I mean it's on the pop stations, some of the country stations, some of the gospel stations...

O sea, está en las estaciones de pop, algunas de las estaciones de "country", algunas de las estaciones de gospel...

..the Rush Limbaugh stations...

..las estaciones de Rush Limbaugh...

And uh, you know, it's an impressive feat for a song that's only one word long.

  Y, tu sabes, es algo impresionante para una canción que solo dice una palabra.

See? He even rhymes "down" with "down". 

Ves? El hasta rima "down" con "down".

Uh, you know...although, I can't be too surprised it's a hit song right now.

Sabes...aunque, no puedo estar muy sorprendido de que es un éxito ahora mismo.

I mean, it sounds like everything else on the radio. 

Porque, ella suena como toda otra cosa en la radio.

I mean, everything else! 

Digo, toda otra cosa!

I've...I've never heard a song that sounds this much like everything. 

Yo he nunca escuchado una canción así de parecido a todo.

I mean, it even has the now required cameo from Lil Wayne,...

O sea, ella hasta tiene el hoy-en-dia obligada parte de Lil Wayne,...

..who's always sounds like he's going through puberty. 

..quien siempre suena como si estuviera pasando por la pubertad.

(Song: "Down like she's 'posed to be. 

(Canción: "Abajo como se supone.

She gets down low for me. 

Ella se va para abajo para mí. 

Down like her temperature.. 

Abajo como su temperatura.. 

'cause to me she's zero degrees") 

porque para mi ella esta a cero grados")

Uh, did Lil Wayne just lose control of his metaphor there?

  Eh, acaba de perderse Lil Wayne en su metáfora aquí?

Now, I always thought when you say a girl is "zero degrees" frozen, that meant she WASN'T into you. I don't know. 

Ahora, yo siempre he pensado que cuando dices que una mujer está congelado a "cero grados", eso quería decir que no NO ESTABA interesada en ti. Yo no se.

Also, why is he dressed like the guy from the White Stripes? 

Y, porque Él está vestido como el hombre de los "White Stripes"?

(Song: "Cold. Over Freeze.

(Cancion: "Frio. 'Over Freeze'

I got that girl from overseas. 

Encontré esa mujer de ultramar.

Now, she's my Miss America. Now can I be her soldier, please?") 

Ahora, ella es mi Miss America. Ahora, puedo ser su soldador, por favor?")

Did he just say "Now, she's my Miss America"...

El acaba de decir "Ahora ella es mi Miss America"...

..and then salute a british flag?!

..y después saluda la bandera de inglaterra?!

(Caption: Lil Wayne 

(Subtitulo: Lil Wayne

Un-American) 

Mal Americano)

(Song: "Honestly, I'm down like the economy") 

(Canción: "Honestamente, estoy abajo como la economía")

Ha, that's clever. "Down like the economy"

Ja, que listo. "Abajo como la economía"

I don't have a job

No tengo trabajo

Thanks for the reminder, Lil Wayne.

Gracias por el recuerdo, Lil Wayne.

Oh now, here's an interesting fact...

Oye, aquí hay algo interesante...

Jay Sean is the first major pop star of Sikh descent.

Jay Sean es el primer estrella pop de ascendencia sij.

Yeah, that's right.

Si, eso es verdad.

Just goes to show you that the pop charts are an all-inclusive place, open to all creeds, and all colors, and all cultures,..

Solo te enseña que el pop es un lugar totalmente inclusiva. Abierto a toda fe, y todo color, y toda cultura,..

..as long as they all sound like everything else.

..siempre que todas suenan como toda otra cosa.

I'm kind of amused that the guy's named "Jay Sean"

Me fascina un poco que su nombre sea "Jay Sean".

I mean, he just had to have a name as generic as his song!

Porque, tenia que tener un nombre igual de generica que su canción!

I mean, it's Jay Sean! 

Pues, es Jay Sean!

I mean, You know Jay Sean? I know Jay Sean! Everyone knows Jay Sean!

Usted conoce a Jay Sean? Yo conozco Jay Sean! Todos conocen a Jay Sean!

Jay Sean’s a star!

Jay Sean es una estrella!

Living the Jay Sean era of music.

Vive la era musical de Jay Sean.

Jay Sean, Jay...

Jay Sean, Jay...

We already got a bunch of Jay's...

Ya tenemos mucho Jay's...

..and we already got a bunch of Sean's...

..y ya tenemos mucho Sean's...

We certainly, don't need a "Jay Sean"

Por cierto, no necesitamos un "Jay Sean"

Hey, wait a minute. Isn't this the same guy who did "Tipsy" a few years back?

Oye, espera un momento. Este no es el mismo hombre que hizo "Tipsy" hace unos años atrás?

Remember "Tipsy", you know...

Recuerdas a "Tipsy"?, tu sabes...

No, I am informed that this is, in fact...J-Kwon.

No, me informan que este es, en realidad...J-Kwon.

J-Kwon, not Jay Sean.

J-Kwon, no Jay Sean.

I mean, I don't even hate this song.

Es que, Yo ni siquiera odio esta canción.

I kinda like this song a little.

De alguna forma me gusta esta canción un poco.

It's just something you don't think about...just goes through you.

Es solo que no es algo que lo piensas...solo pasa por ti.

You don't wake up in the morning wanting to hear "Down" by Jay Sean.

Uno no se despierta por la man/ana queriendo escuchar a "Down" de Jay Sean.

It's not something you can connect to. I mean...

No es algo con que puedes conectarte. O sea...

"Are you down?" Is not really a romantic sentiment, you know?

"Are you down?" de verdad no es un concepto romántico, sabes?

"Do you agree agree agree agree agree?"

"Estas acuerdo acuerdo acuerdo acuerdo acuerdo acuerdo?"

"Are you comfortable with the terms of this proposal?"

"Estás cómodo con los términos de esta propuesta?"

I mean, if you're going to be repeating one word over and over again, why is it "down"?

Digo, si vas a estar repitiendo una palabra una y otra vez, porque tiene que ser "down"(abajo)?

Why isn't it something like "love" or "yours" or "forever" or uh,...

Por que no puede ser algo como "love"(amor) o "yours"(tuyo) o "forever"(siempre) o eh,...

"Forever"...

"Forever"...

Hey, hold on, let me check something here.

Oye,aguantate, dejame averiguar algo aquí.

..Oh my god!

..Dios mio!

It's "Forever" by Chris Brown!

Es "Forever" de Chris Brown!

"Down" by Jay Sean is basically the same as "Forever" by Chris Brown. I mean,...

"Down" de Jay Sean es básicamente lo mismo que "Forever" de Chris Brown. O sea,...

..the melody's a little different, but mostly it's the same song!

..la melodía es un poco diferente, pero mayoría de la canción es la misma!

I mean, they got the same tempo...

O sea, tienen el mismo ritmo...

..the same chorus structure..

..la misma estructura del coro..

Both about whisking you away on a magic flying carpet to the, uh, eternal dance floor of love.

Los dos se tratan de llevarte en un viaje mágico hacia la pista eterna de amor.

There's not a major difference!

No hay mayor diferencia!

This is great!

Esto es genial!

This is just great! 'cause...

Simplemente genial! Porque...

"Forever" was Chris Brown's only good song!

"Forever" fue la unica cancion buena de Chris Brown!

And now we don't have to listen to that anymore!

Y ahora ya ni tenemos que escuchar esa más!

'cause we got Jay Sean's "Down" to replace it!

Porque tenemos a "Down" de Jay Sean para reemplazarlo!

So we can just delete this guy from the cultural memory banks forever!

Así que podemos borrar este hombre de nuestra memoria cultural por siempre!

Awesome!

Magnífico!

See, Jay Sean? You do have a purpose.

Ves, Jay Sean? Usted si tiene un propósito.

You are the new and improved Chris Brown.

Usted es el nuevo y mejorado Chris Brown.

(Caption: Now with 31% less domestic abuse!)

(Subtitulo: Ahora con 31% menos abuso doméstico!)

I'm glad you're around.

Me alegra que estás aquí.

(Credits: THE END. "Down" is owned by Cash Money Records. 

(Creditos: FIN. "Down" es propiedad de Cash Money Records. 

This review is owned by me, I guess.)

Esta crítica es propiedad mía, supongo)

[guardians-of-iselda]

"It feels sort of like kissing an old lover one last time, even though you know you shouldn’t. Because, though she may not be perfect, god damn, if a day hasn’t gone by where you remembered that first time. So you probably shouldn’t look back, right? That way lies madness"

Dan Roth, “The Veronica Mars movie got me to write a review. Here’s why”

[afishdrowning]

Please signal boost.

I believe someone who can lip read can tell us something important about this video and the speaker's message. 

The last audible message available to hearing-abled people is "news media." I suspect that the creator's purpose is to illustrate one of the strongest ways that media outlets suppress the people and stories that fall outside of their status quo: via silence. 

Only a select number of marginalized people will understand and be able to share the full message of this video. As long as we keep expecting the message to be catered to the abled, privileged masses—as long as we lack other perspectives—we may never know it.

Am I right? Please send this video to friends and followers in search for lip readers. Thank you very much.

[fantastyfreak]

Vampire Lestat Book Coven Newsletter 7/30/14:New Vampire Lestat First Edition Copy Contest Details/Vampire Lestat Live Chat #4 Details

Vampire Lestat Book Coven Newsletter 7/30/14:New Vampire Lestat First Edition Copy Contest Details/Vampire Lestat Live Chat #4 Details

Keep reading this post, all the way to the end to find out ways of winning your own SIGNED, FIRST-EDITION HARDCOVER of The Vampire Lestat!!

First things first, the Lestat Book Coven had a highly stimulating conversation with online vampire film reviewer/guru/expert-Maven of the Eventide of ChezApocalypse. Maven of the Eventide, for many fans of Anne Rice’s works, has done two impeccably…

[channelawesomeconfessionsblog]

Since NChick's been gone...

Ever since Nostalgia Chick left to do her own thing (which I don’t begrudge her at all, btw) I feel very little reason to go back to the site. There are few girl reviewers reviewing girl things in TGWTG and she was one of the main draws for me. It feels more like a boys club now and I find myself forgetting to even check the site regularly. It’s not that the guys aren’t good, they are! But I don’t have a lot of interest in the things a lot of them are talking about. It makes me sad because TGWTG has been a huge part of my entertainment and community for many years now.

[liquid--coke]

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Karen Santora (@karensantora.to)

Fantastic analysis done by Foldable Human on male gaze and how Sam Witwicky of Michael Bay's Transformers films is a representation of how straight white men view themselves. I highly suggest his videos for in-depth film and game analysis. #transformers #samwitwicky #foldablehuman #foldingideas #chezapocalypse

[darthprince69]

My Favorite Fanfiction-Paying Homage to my new FAV. YA NOVEL and My Darth Prince

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/9665610/1/Andromeda-Slate-s-Waltz-in-the-Swamp This is my sublime Darth Vadar X Andromeda Slate Fanfiction. I already have one reassuring review, and I'm thinking of resuscitating Andromeda from her death via erotic strangulation. My Darth Prince might still have use for her! :D :D:D 

[hoshikira]

To Todd

Your wish for top song was granted by ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼ all mighty, not God. Even the light was pink. Think twice before you make a wish next time. For more information on ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼ ask JesuOtaku, she even has a plushie if I'm correct.

As for your wish, you now have to live up to the following terms in your contract with ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼. You give your soul up, which gets placed in a soulgem. You do not let anything happen to it. Or you die. Next, think of a costume, because you know have to turn into a magical... Todd and fight witches. They drop grief seeds, you need them to purify your soul gem, or you turn into... witch Todd??? Uh... Warlock! And you destroy shit out of despair. You will also meet the occasional magical girl who also made a contract. You may join forces, but take note that when they find out about the witch thing in the contract that sometimes go homicidal.

Have fun and try not to die/turn into Warlock!Todd too fast! ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼

[forevertrueblue]

Well, I survived.

PS: Land ;)

[hellolinzie]

Ursa breaks down shipping and what can influence the shipping community.

[catbot158]

Fun with N Chick and Nella

Lindsey: Reach for the stars! You'll still get the moon!

Nella: No, reach for the moon, you'll still land among the stars; that's the quote.

L: Wait, that doesn't make any sense.

N: No, you aim for the moon; if you miss, you'll still land among the stars.

L: ...

L: Stars are further than the moon, who said that?!

[afishdrowning]

"Shakespeare Month" on Brows Held High

All my literature- or film-loving friends should watch the "Shakespeare Month" series on the internet show "Brows Held High" (7 videos, plus introduction, all professionally done). Each of the videos looks at a different kind of relationship to the texts as used by various film directors.

  Introduction

  Selling the text, "Romeo and Juliet" Baz Luhrmann's "Romeo + Juliet"

  Delivering the text, "Much Ado About Nothing" Joss Whedon's "Much Ado About Nothing"

  Interpreting the text, "Richard III" Richard Loncraine's "Richard III"

  Rearranging the text, "The Tempest" Derek Jarman's "The Tempest"

  Exploiting the text, "A Midsummer Night's Dream" Stuart Canterbury's "A Midsummer Night's Cream"

  Revising the text, "The Taming of the Shrew" Gil Junger's "10 Things I Hate About You"

  Relationship to author, the authorship question Roland Emmerich's "Anonymous"

If you watch none of the others, watch the "Anonymous" episode. It's both at once witty and enlightening.