#cheesy mode to the max I know

[ryuusea]

sherliam 💝 putting a ribbon on because he’s a gift

[newestq]

i love your p1harmony writing! could you do first dates with the members?

┊ ˚➶ ｡˚ ☁️ p1harmony | more here!

synopsis — first dates with p1harmony.

author's note — n/a.

wc > 1.070k , genre : fluff , gn!reader – fem!reader for theo

⊹ keeho

doesn't act like it, but he's really nervous

he hasn't been on many dates and he just wants to make a good impression

his leader mode is an instinct and he ends up ordering for you

"i could've ordered myself," you smile towards him, handing the waitress your menu

"oh–right. sorry, i'm so used to ordering for the guys," he laughs awkwardly

you both talk a lot about your hometowns. since both of you are foreigners, you connect with the feeling of being away from home

shopping was the next thing y'all did after y'all finished eating, and he spoiled you to the max

anything you wanted, he bought it for you—even if you could afford it, he was buying it

by the end of the date, you and keeho had matching outfits and matching earrings 😛

the two of you have been talking for a few weeks now, and are yet to make it official, but keeho can confidently say he'll be taking the next step after this date

⊹ taeyang : theo — gender specific

sets up a cute picnic date for the two of you

is really nervous, and ends up going to keeho for help

"what do girls eat? like is there something specific or..?"

"taeyang, be so for real right now."

yeah... he's a mess.

him and keeho end up buying an assortment of foods since he couldn't just decide on one or two things to base everything off of

poor baby tried so hard on everything, just for it to be ruined by the bees and the weather

he was really sulky when the two of you had to cancel the picnic date, but you didn't mind

brings you to the dorms to watch a movie, which was a bad idea because everyone was at the dorms and were interrogating you two

"do you know he doesn't wear chapstick?"

"intak, shut the fuck up"

"she needs to know!"

⊹ jiung

you had been on a few dates with people before you'd gotten with jiung

he had asked what the dates were like, and you had told them that they were all pretty much the same: movies, dinner, golf...

he had made it his goal to make your first date together something you'd never done before

so hiking was the plan.

you'd expressed how much you wanted to go hiking to him before, and he never found a good enough opportunity to bring you. but with his schedule clear for a few days, and your vacation from school, it was perfect.

ends up enjoying it more than you do-even though he fell a few (lot) times

"jiung, baby. can we please take a break?"

"a break? right now? but this is way to fun."

he eventually listens to your whines, and y'all sit in a spot that gives y'all the best view

"thank you for this. best first date ever."

"it better be. i busted my ass for you."

⊹ intak

definitely will take you to the beach

buys cute matching swimsuits, and brags about it to his members non-stop

"okay you're better than me at smash bros, but do you and your partner have matching swimsuits? that's what i thought"

"intak, i'm single."

"cry about it."

jongseob: T-T

anyway, he also stays up the night before creating a playlist for the ride

titles it something cheesy, like "pov: beach trip with yr baby" or something

takes SO MANY cute pictures together

like he cant post them but he will show everyone he can

shows up to rehearsal talking bout

"hey pd nim wanna see what me and y/n did this weekend?"

he's actually infatuated

y'all are so that couple everyone sees in the water at the beach and gets jealous of fr

snowballs on the beach <3

probably rents a golf cart and drives around while listening to the playlist he made with you

he just loves you sm

⊹ shota : soul

shota actually didn't plan y'all date, taeyang did

they had time off and decided to go to an amusement park

you and shota hadn't seen each other in some time, and taeyang suggested shota bring you along for some quality time

you happily agreed

one thing about shota, however: he loves the extreme rides

haha you're definitely not pissing yourself while waiting in line for a rollercoaster! that's childish! haha..

laughs at you while you're literally crying your eyes out

he feels bad afterwards though and buys you a lot of food to make up for it (well he uses keeho's money)

goes on the rides you want to go on, and he secretly takes pictures of you and sets them as his lockscreen <3

poor jongseob is third wheeling

once y'all left the park, y'all go eat out and jiung makes you and shota sit at a separate table to talk (much to keeho's protests)

"what if they do something they aren't supposed to??"

"like what?"

"like something adults do."

"keeho, he just turned 18."

⊹ jongseob

you plan the date, since he's in your hometown, and decide to go kayaking

he's never done it before and it makes you really excited that his first time kayaking his with you

he gets a little scared when trying to get in the kayak and it takes him a while before he finally sits in it

while laughing at him trying to get in, you fall out of your kayak. he's so shocked and he starts laughing too-which causes him to fall out

screams like a girl while falling

eventually y'all are just laughing so hard while drifting in the water

y'all get yelled at for being in the way of other kayaks, so y'all take a break from something y'all didn't even start and eat ice cream

there's a lot of other things to do at the place you brought him, so y'all venture out and go on water slides, play with water guns, feed alligators, (which he's never seen before and almost shits himself), and end it with eating seafood

when you're both dry, he takes pictures of you with his camera and posts one on weverse, even though he isn't supposed to

[f0point5]

The ask that said Max is going to with THE race, the proposal race, and the other one that said his plan is not having a plan and let everything unfold naturally sits so right to me because in my delulu mind those two are connected.

Hear my delulu-ness out, please.

Max let's everything ran it's course, doesn't do a jealous act, nor some idiotic demand, nothing like that, he just stays by her side and let Elliot mess up, or Y/N broke whatever they have up. Why? Because he's confident, he gives me that cool collected guy kinda vibe. He knows they are soulmates, meant to be. They are each others person, he's sure of it. And because of that confidence, he knows he's going to win the race to her heart, cheesy as fuck but you get it.

I don't know why but deep down I think he's seeing everything in his racing mode. He knows he has a rocketship, his relationship with her, and nobody match that. There may be a few, very few, ups and down, things they need to work out, their relationship fears, but despite that he's going to win. He's going to come up champion. He's not that rookie kid anymore, he's not going to turn all Mad Max the second something does not go the way he likes or wish, he's trusting the process, making a few comments here and there but trusting either way. Because a rookie won a few scarce races that does not mean he's going to be champion, Max's knows that, so he isn't sweating.

Maybe I'm too much in my head that I need the Y/N Max end game because I'm too invested in the smau, but that's what I feel. And I'm manifesting too so 🤷🏻‍♀️

The fact that Max’s message works on multiple levels fills me with warmth because this man is like the opposite of good with words and get he got Shakespearean right there with his symbolism and metaphors like a literature class could sit down with that text message lol.

Max trusts the car, but he’s got to drive it. Max can trust the process but he’s got to be processing. That’s all Imma say on that right there.

Also not me reading that “race to her heart” and thinking there should be an F1 romantic drama called Racing Hearts but there’s already a movie with that title and it’s about…pigeons.

[the-firebird69]

The front end that's messed up no it's better and the rear is fine you need doors and I said yeah and a hard top and he said who's this ass is a great idea and it said Volkswagen and I said yeah I said why could you ever go wrong with that design it's awesome it's like oh Lamborghini made one like lotus and he started smiling saying that's terrific when do we start tomorrow I want 10 million of these but make the paint a little better finish the interior and foot doors and a roof on you and voila sell them for a 500 Grand each and so he goes okay he tried to make it perfect and it works and he a list of stuff and he just didn't do it and it is Trump it's a new idea the one he had was like a replica shrunken down and it doesn't work as good as this and he thinks he's in Volkswagen mode he's just kind of harassing us but really he might do this and we will piggy back it's not bad design and her son says it too it's like unique and compact won't go a million miles an hour but you're going to go fast and it's small and it's lowered and it really is and it will go about 280 with a standard motor and top end it's 130 horsepower on this one and if you put the kid on top of the exhaust I know about 320 and boy it looks really cool and really the small tires and if you make it look the same looks kind of cheesy it's a good concept and you may not have done it on purpose but it goes faster with a bigger Wheels just leaving alone is something that you don't really do on purpose much

We're going to try and produce these and it's not a toy but there are four wheelers that can be made into this but you be stuck on the street but now there are somewhat super cars for the off-road really have to make the Baja buggy it's really the car and people would love it they're tired of this buggy stuff and the car is awesome and you can make it convertible and latch it on pretty good people like it it's really nice and it's fun as heck and we tried it out quite a bit but we're going to try and make these out of Volkswagen and larger Fiat and a couple others cuz they're just sitting there doing nothing and people need to get the hell out of our face we're going to start up a factory and it has the kit and this guy just pooped out he's got no kid and we noticed that the max want us to do certain things and this is one of them not really sure why no you think others including Maxwill do something about it like they did to these guys

Thor Freya the dagger is not being built and it probably won't be so he says good Volkswagen it is and it's about the right size it's two inches too short in the wheelbase I really just make it 2 inches shorter in the door or something and who cares and scissors it's really making sense so it doesn't look different and people are small and the fit anyways and the door was pretty good size so we're going to go ahead with that and make those kits and he wants someone to pick it up and he wants us to sign someone to pick up the assignment and make the kit cuz it's one of those cars that you can do that with it's famous it was out for a little and he says maybe my son is right the Chrysler car it's not a Dodge but it's the same family but you can make a kitten for the supercar on a Chrysler chassis and the Chrysler is still making cars but not tons and it would be like an inexpensive kit you can get away with and we are an American company he says I usually start things off it's a good idea it's like the current Honda a little older but back in the day it didn't look like different than what they have now. Back in the day was different but now it's the old fashioned so we're going to look at the Chrysler as well as the dagger

Thor Freya

Olympus

Were thinking of using these in the Midwest

Thor Freya

[some-ghoul]

GAMEPLAY: Engage > Fates > Awakening > 3H.

Engage emblem rings are really neat and the weapon triangle meaning something again is rad plus it removes pair ups. Which is really fun as far as a gameplay mechanic for strategizing. Having little skills and focusing hard on weapon triangles and where you need units positioned it ACTUALLY made me think which is saying a lot with usual fire emblem games being a, ok I'll send in a nuke and they will fix it (3H and Awakening had bad problems with this).

Fates class system and weapon differences, god and conquests map design?? Plus the unique weapons they added in next to the different types of class seals you could to min max and make an astra general was always fun.

Awakening had fun but repetitive. Having a good amount of skills to mess around with but once whenever you had galeforce why have anything else? Pair ups were very neat and a nice addition but they did kind of make it easier because why wouldn't you pair units up that way?

3H being able to change to ANY class and almost everyone being a Swiss army knife with what weapons they could use sorta took away from the actual strategy from it since you could throw in Byleth and any unit you spoon fed exp to for perfect class stats and wipe the floor with everyone. Battalions were also kind of busted too. Neat that there was a NG+ mode though and I did appreciate that. Overall though I turn my brain off and the game goes on.

STORY: Awakening > Engage ≥ 3H > Fates.

I might be biased for all my hours burnt into Awakening but I genuinely really like the story of it and the time travel thing is really cool! If you don't romance Lucina or Chrom though it does kinda lessen the character growth Lucina goes through. But it has a lot of neat subtle call backs to the previous series, I just wish there was more from the shadowy figure that was Chrom's evil war loving father. Wallhart was rad and I want more antagonists like him that are unapologetic about who they are. Overall, really neat and the xenologue with Lucina's timeline is really good and still chokes me up at times.

Engage is basic, but Dragon Quest basic. Once you get into it and are set into the journey it is enjoyable legitimately. As far as the story goes sure it's generic but overall it flows pretty well. Also I legit like Alear as the protagonist everyone loves since it makes sense due to them being dragon Jesus. There are some... Generic and cheesy bits every now and then but cliche can be fun! Overall pretty solid and enjoyable.

3H is very complex, and that's a good thing and a bad thing. If the different routes were done in a way to where they were written equally and well it would be really neat! Unfortunately it feels very unfinished at worst and poorly written at best whenever you come in plot contrivances. HOWEVER it has the fucking dark souls problem where all the interesting things in the world and nation is hidden away in walls of texts in the library. I really liked it at times but I know it's not that great unfortunately.

Oh god fates. I like fates genuinely and I would even say it's one of my favorite fire emblem games but oof, the story hurts in every path. You would think with revelation it would tidy up the mess that is conquest and birthright but it doesn't. It keeps you in the dark on a lot and it boils down to Corrin going, "Nah fam, trust me." And people LITERALLY TURN AGAINST THEIR COUNTRY FOR THE PROTAG WITH THEIR DOGS AIRING OUT!! The concept of Hoshido and Nohr fighting is really interesting of Nohr being a country that is in dire need of good land and resources and having to go to war for it but when you have Garon the evil king who ONLY DOES EVIL THINGS I cannot bring myself to view as 'complex writing'. Oh god and Valla, fucking Valla. Scarlet is doomed to die and Gunther will betray you no matter what. I hate the plot goddamn.

CHARACTERS: 3H > Engage ≥ Awakening > Fates.

I think the reason why 3H has stayed so high up on everyone's list of good fire emblem games is because the characters in the game are very VERY complex. Honestly I can't think of any student cast that falls flat and I don't care about whenever I go through their supports. I do think the Blue Lions and Black Eagles get the best written characters but goddamn if the Golden Deer aren't super charming! The different ideologies and writing for characters motivations are pretty compelling at points. I can't think of a support that actually makes me skip through or be bored with it. I love these characters and their motives. I want to see them interact more and it is what kept me so I'm ested. The lords are also really neat and I think 3 Hopes does a fantastic job of helping their problem in Houses because Edelgard goes from fascist to freedom fighter ina fucking heartbeat I'm that one. Even when opposed she seems like a person with genuine good intentions. I could go on forever about it. Hopes also made me like Byleth more than how much I didn't care for the silent emotionless protag, but Shez was also a very fun breath of fresh air too and especially with that cast!

Engage has a very colorful almost too designed approach with their characters, which I have mixed feelings on, but characters being a troupe and ALSO being interesting with almost any cast member is a good time! I'll be honest, I kinda hated Engage at first then I had supports with Alfred and met Yunaka. It got me hooked, then I did emblem bond conversations and it was fantastic to see old characters fully voiced and revisited. Especially since the more straight edged ones (Ike and Soren) are most of the time absolutely hating being around such unhinged people. The main cast of characters are very fun and their tropes are fun to be played off except I don't really care for the chef man who wants to just eat rocks. The lords are fun and Celine with her interactions to Fogado/ Best Boy Alcryst are really great and show that there is genuine care put into the characters writing. Oh god, Alear also brings a wonderful fresh take on the insert protag and I genuinely like them as a protag in this one everyone loves. And Alear plays it really fucking well! Being just likable, trusting, and sweet to folks because it's in their nature only to have other interactions completely disgusted by people actually worshipping them and what lengths they go too! It's a great bit! Engage is good, cheesy at times but the characters are fun.

Awakening characters are pretty one not and troupey but are still written in a very good way at times. Lucina and Robin are great. I also really like Tiki dialogue too it's great to have her back. The paralogues for dlc units were also good (minus Priam)! They kinda knew folks liked these characters and wanted to do more with them so they brought them back into the game. The child unit supports are phenomenal though. Owain is dumb and I fucking love him same with Inigo. And depending on who the father is their supports with them are even better with how they console/chastise their child in those dialogues because it's a reflection of them too! Again I'm kinda biased about awakening though so that's my take.

Awakening characters are one note, get kind of old after a minute, and the only good Corrin sibling dialogues are with his Nohrian siblings because they actually know him. Leo, Xander, Camilla, and Elise legitimately have good supports with their sibling and it's neat. However they literally rescues 6 Awakening characters for the massive roster and it shows. They don't really change and the only redeeming interactions for really good character convos are the ones in the paralogues with just the kids. Which, again, ripped from Awakening.

I've only played 4 FE games. How would you rank them amongst each other?

You can base it off of story, gameplay, whatever. Mine is mostly story with a bit of gameplay/format elements. Lemme know if you have any questions!

[bubblesreplies]

The Middle

Max Brinly X Female Reader

Oneshot

APPARENTLY IF YOU’RE READING THIS IN ANY DARK COLORED FORMAT ON TUMBLR (LIKE NIGHT MODE) IT LOOKS FUCKING WEIRD AND IDK HOW TO FIX IT I’M SO SORRY.

A/N: No, I'm not neglecting my other fics to write a random oneshot? Why would you even suggest---fuck it here it is besties. Anyways, this product of procrastination is dedicated and written for my bestie @house-of-kolchek, who loves Max as much as I do.

WARNINGS AND TAGS: NSFW 18+ ONLY, this is unedited and might be awful, Reader is Jacob's cousin, manipulative!Emma but like in a good way, BFF!Emma, Emma/Jacob, Abi/Nick, making Emma cooler than she is, sweetheart!Max, unrequited love (assumably), forced proximity, sex jokes, unsafe seating situations while driving DO NOT DO THIS PLEASE, lap-sitting, erections, staring down your shirt, teasing, love confessions, very very cheesy and idc anymore

Word Count: 8k

Main Masterlist

“EMMA, that is the stupidest idea in seriously the entire world.”

You meant it, too; you already thought that this little impromptu camping trip was an awful idea; the last time that the group of you were out in the woods, it ended with werewolves, so, could anybody really be blamed for not wanting to tempt fate? And now hearing Emma’s latest plan, you couldn’t help but say fuck this whole entire trip and its mom, too. 

“Oh—come on!” Emma insisted with a pout across her face, leaning across her oversized suitcase—who in the world needed all of that space for a weekend camping trip? “Babes, you are my wing-woman here—my ultimate girl. Come on, please—Jacob won’t even look at me when we hang out. I really need your help with this!”

You sighed; a year ago, when the ten of you—eight, if you considered the fact that you hadn’t actually met two of the camp counselors until the end of the summer—worked at Hackett’s Quarry and endured that shitshow of a summer, you hadn’t even liked Emma. You didn’t like how she had your cousin, Jacob, mooning all over her like she owned the whole fucking Earth. You didn’t like the way that the nicest girl you’d ever met seemed to think she walked on water, too, and you did not appreciate the fact that she thought she was entitled to tell you all the ways that you were doing your makeup all wrong. 

But then, that night happened. The night of the full moon, when your idiot cousin sabotaged the van just to get another night with the woman he’d fallen in love with who couldn’t give a rat’s ass about him. The night where the ten of you had miraculously survived werewolves, and a crazy-ass family trying to kill you all night. That night was what changed everything. 

You’d gotten stranded with Emma running through the woods, and somehow landed yourself in a heated battle with Jacob—who had apparently been bitten by one of those things because he was now one of those things. He, obviously, tried to kill the two of you and Emma thought fast, using a piece of silver jewelry to save both of your lives and buy you enough time to get the hell out of there. 

And then, you’d been locked in a room with her and Abi, the three of you not knowing if you would survive the night, and something just…changed. You began to see her differently, and from that point on, throughout this entire past year, the three of you had been best friends. 

More you and Emma, if you were being honest, because Abi and Nick had just gotten engaged three months ago and most of her free time went to him.

Not that it hurt your feelings. If you somehow managed to bag the man of your dreams, you’d be spending every free moment with him, too. 

“Jacob just…needs time,” you informed her with a groan, throwing your tennis shoes across the room as you frantically looked for your favorite pair of leggings. “He’s still hurt, you know? You can’t just tell him you didn’t mean any of it and then expect him to forgive you and jump back into your arms, Emma.”

“Which is why I need you to get me into his cabin this weekend,” Emma pleaded, getting up from her place on your bed and digging through your drawers as she pulled out the very clothes you were looking for. You swore that sometimes, it was literally like she could read your mind. “All we have to do is fake a fight; I will refuse to sleep in the same cabin as you, and then the boys will offer to switch with us. I’ll get a whole night—and a whole, isolated cabin—with Jacob; and you? Well, let’s not pretend that you aren’t benefitting from my little plan.”

You snorted, shimmying out of your jeans and pulling your leggings up over your legs, smiling as Emma nodded towards your ass in approval. If she thought that you looked good, you could rest assured that you damn well did.

“And how will I benefit from getting into a fake fight with you and causing a scene?” You questioned, your head cocked as Emma passed you your shoes and you eagerly slipped them on. The rest of your group would be here at any minute, and you didn’t want to keep them waiting. 

“Because if I end up in Jacob’s cabin, you know who ends up in yours? Max.”

You whipped around and shot Emma a glare, shaking your head like you couldn’t believe that she would just mention his name all casually like that. You’d made her swear to never bring up your pathetic, unrequited crush on Max Brinly ever again, since the day she’d first found out that it even existed in the first place. 

You first met Max when the sun came up after that hellish night at Hackett’s Quarry. You and Emma had run back to the island to see if Jacob was there and if he was alive, and you ended up running into Max instead. After lots of screaming and confusion, the two of you finally allowed him to explain just how in the fuck he had gotten there and who he was, which is when you learned that your one night of hell had lasted two months for him and his girlfriend. 

Emma had found Jacob and ran after him, but you stayed behind with Max, talking and laughing at his jokes, attempting not to swoon at the adorableness that was his laugh. You had hoped, at the beginning of the summer, to find somebody just like him and have a summer romance. Somebody who was cute, who could make you laugh, and seemed to understand you instantly.

It didn’t work out that way, obviously—seeing as the summer had been over and Max Brinly had a girlfriend. 

Laura eventually came back for him and you parted ways, assuming that this would be the last time that you would ever see Max Brinly, attributing your budding feelings for him as some sort of trauma response to the night that you had just been through. 

Imagine your surprise when, a month after Hackett’s Quarry, the new co-worker that you were assigned to train at the coffee shop was none other than Max Brinly. You assumed right away that he wouldn’t even remember you—why would he?---but you were wrong. He knew exactly and immediately who you were, and the two of you hit it off just as well as you did the first time you had ever spoken to him. It wasn’t long before you were hanging out with him every single day, and he had slowly become your best friend. 

You went to movies together, you got dinner, he came to all of the track and field competitions you ran in at your local university, you helped him study hard enough to get into a new graduate school—literally, anything that you could think of, the two of you did it together.  You even stayed the night at each other’s apartments on occasion, both of you knowing what the other’s couch felt like pretty intimately. 

In fact, the only time the two of you weren’t together was when Laura came to town to visit her boyfriend. Before she dumped him, at least.

It was nearly a month and a half ago now, that you had sat on this very bed with Max as he sobbed, asking you just to hold him and not ask any questions when he told you that he and Laura had broken up. 

“Max isn’t into me, so that really doesn’t help your case,” you grumbled, your pissy mood only continuing to sour the more that you thought about it. After Max and Laura, you thought that you might actually stand a chance with him. After all, he spent all of his free time with you, and you knew that nobody in this world knew him as well as you did—and vice versa. But after the night that he’d sobbed with you, fallen asleep in your bed, and told you how he felt like years of his life were wasted with Laura, nothing ever happened. 

He just went right on back to being the same old Max, your friend.

“Do you seriously still think that that boy has no feelings for you whatsoever?” Emma shrieked, watching as Jacob’s car pulled up from the window, hurriedly throwing her hair up into a sexily-tossed messy bun. “‘Cause, if you do, you’re so wrong that it isn’t even funny anymore.”

“Em, if he had feelings for me, then why didn’t anything change after he and Laura broke up?!” You interjected, a frown pulling at your lips as you grabbed your tiny duffel bag and hiked it up over your shoulder. “And also, why would he date Laura for so long if he actually, secretly liked me instead? Your logic isn’t logic-ing,” you insisted, and Emma smirked.

“You are so naive that it’s actually kind of cute,” she responded, rolling her eyes as Jacob opted to honk instead of being a gentleman and coming to the door. Emma sauntered over to you, playing with the ends of your hoodie and eyeing it suspiciously. “Look, just—help me with this plan, and you’ll see, okay? And change into that sexy little top I bought you last month for the car ride.”

“Emma!”

“Just trust me!” Emma insisted, pulling the hoodie up and over your head for you and tossing you the lacey black crop top she’d bought you last month. “Put it on—good, yes, I would so bang you—oh, and just in case you find out that Max also wants to bang you, I snuck condoms into your bag.”

“You have got to be kidding me, Emma!” You shrieked, although it was with a large smile on your face as you were, once again, blown away by the antics of your friend. 

Emma only laughed as the two of you rushed down to the car, you having to help Emma with one half of her bag since she’d brought such a gigantic one. You’d barely made it to the door before there was a knock on it—apparently Jacob had decided to be a gentleman after all. Or he’d simply gotten impatient, which was the better bet of the two options.

“Keep your pants on cuz, we’re coming,” you hissed out, lowering your end of Emma’s bag to the ground as you ripped open the door to your apartment. Your annoyed glare dropped and your mouth fell open as you saw Max standing there, his cheeks red and running a hand through his freshly-cut red hair. “Max! I, uh, thought you were Jacob?”

Fuck, why did you sound so fucking awkward?! Your conversation with Emma had you paranoid and upset, and if you kept acting this way, Max would definitely notice. The two of you had crossed the awkward barrier a long time ago.

“Ah, nah,” Max answered, his signature smile flashing across his face and warming you up from the inside out. “Jake’s too possessive over that steering wheel to get his ass over to the door honestly.”

“That and he doesn’t want to have to speak to me,” Emma sighed, lugging her bag forward and hitting Max in the chest with it. You suppressed a giggle as he let out an “Oomph!”, but he caught your smile and playfully sneered at you. “Oh, what a gentleman! And damn, Max, I’ve never noticed how strong you are. Have you, Y/n?! Have you ever noticed those biceps?” 

“Cut it out, Emma,” you hissed under your breath, grateful that Max had already turned around and was heaving her oversized bag to the trunk of the car. “I know what you’re doing, and it isn’t going to work on me.”

“What am I doing?” Emma asked with faux innocence, batting her eyelashes heavily down at you before she winked. “Just use it as fuel for our fake fire, if you want, babes. Besides—would it really kill you to admit in front of him that he looks good?! Give the boy a win, Y/n!”

“He does not think of me that way—”

“Hey, um, Emma?” Max called out as you were locking your front door behind you, and you turned and ran over to where he was pursing his lips behind the trunk. “Maybe we should’ve brought a bigger car, but, your bag is not going to fit back here.”

Emma turned to look and her lips, too, were pursed. 

“Well, where’s everyone sitting?” She asked, peering her head into the car to check out the situation. 

“Well, uh, Jacob’s driving—obviously—Abi and Nick are in the row of two seats behind him, and then he wants you to sit back in the last row with me while Y/n takes the passenger seat,” Max explained, using his hands to gesture to each person. Abi turned around to look at you from her place in the car, Nick’s head in her lap as he slept, and she waved. You waved back, grimacing at the large bag that was seated at your feet. 

“Hmm, no, that won’t do,” Emma insisted with a wave of her hand, using all of her strength to heave her bag up and over the full trunk of the car and into the last row of seats. “It’s going to have to go here—and oh, I really didn’t sleep well last night, so if I don’t sit in the passenger seat, I’ll get sick.” 

Max’s jaw dropped and he scoffed lightly, looking between the two of you as you held in a large groan. 

“I don’t really see how that makes any sense?” He questioned.

“So Y/n will have to sit in the back, with you!” Emma finished with a gleeful squeal, hurrying to shut the trunk and turning to make her way to the passenger seat of the car. 

“Um—hold on a minute, just where the fuck in the back will I sit?!” You barked out, gesturing incredulously to the monstrosity that was her luggage all over the back seat of the car. “Your bag is taking up the entire row—all but one seat, Em! And it’s way too fucking big to go down at our feet!” 

Emma put a daintly little finger to her chin, and you could tell that she was only pretending to think about the predicament.

“Well, it’s only about a forty-five minute drive,” she informed you, a wicked smile pushing its way onto her lips. “It’s not that long, so, just sit on Max’s lap?”

Your eyes widened and you felt sweat beading on the back of your neck, your heart beating at an intensely quick pace just at the mere thought of having to sit on Max. One look at Max’s face showed he heard her suggestion, too, because it was unnaturally blank and pale. 

You walked closer to Emma, pulling her into you as you said, “You better be fucking for real with your next suggestion, or we will get in an actual fight, Emma,” you warned her, your voice low enough that Max couldn’t hear it. You noticed that he was already ushering Nick and Abi out of the car, hurrying to his seat in the back, and the three of them were just waiting on you. 

“Oh my g—will you just trust me, for once in your life?!” Emma begged dramatically, clinging onto your arm and giving you a little push towards Max. “Thank me later, hoe.”

Oh no, I will not be thanking you later, you sneaky little she-devil, you thought to yourself, climbing over Abi’s seat and landing ungracefully into Max’s lap. He caught you much more elegantly than you fell, luckily, and he helped you right yourself so that your back was facing his chest. 

You turned your face towards him despite the fact that it was burning, and you brushed a strand of hair back behind your ear. 

“You know, I could always just sit on her bag instead of on you,” you offered, geturing weakly over to the big problem that Emma had handed over to the two of you with a private sneer at her back. “That way I won’t crush your legs into tiny pieces of ash.”

Max actually laughed out loud at that and your heart swelled with a feeling of accomplishment; Max was funny, he had probably always been funny, and anytime that you had gotten him to laugh, you took it as a personal achievement. 

“Please sweetheart, as if you could,” Max retorted, winding an arm around your waist as he pulled your back flush against his chest, leaving his arm to rest across your stomach and his fingers splayed across your hipbone. You closed your eyes, holding in a sigh as you prayed that he couldn’t see the way that your face had reddened from this angle. “Besides, this is probably the…safer option of the two.”

You heartily disagreed with that. 

Still, you positioned yourself against him, awkwardly playing with your fingers on your lap as you had no idea where to rest your hands. You and Max were close, yes, but you had never physically been close, aside from a few silly moments of teasing tickles, accidentally falling asleep on his shoulder, or him resting his legs on your lap as the two of you watched a movie together. This was entirely new territory, and you had no idea what to do with it, and you knew that if Emma hadn’t forced this to happen, that Max wouldn’t have chosen to even be in this situation with you. Probably. 

“Jacob, the drive is forty-five minutes?” You called up to him, wincing as you watched your cousin’s teeth grit in the rearview mirror as he attempted to ignore Emma completely.

“An hour, if traffic’s bad,” Jacob called back and you groaned, your leg shaking furiously in your nervousness. As if Max could sense that you were on edge—fuck, with the way that you were bouncing around he probably could feel it—his other hand landed on your thigh, rubbing calming circles around as he successfully got it to stop shaking.

“Sorry, I don’t know why I’m so anxious today,” you sighed, rubbing a hand down your face and leaning back into Max. You could hear his groan and you winced, assuming you had hurt him, as you instantly tried to reposition yourself to take some of the weight off of him.

After a few minutes of frantic wiggling, Max’s hands harshly gripped onto your waist, his fingernails digging into you as he held you tightly into place and you froze, your eyes wide and breath held. 

“Y/n, please—stop.” Max’s voice was incredibly hoarse, coming out in a groan and you winced again, mortified that you had hurt him enough to elicit this sort of response. 

“Oh shit, Max! I am so sorry—I was trying not to hurt you and then I did hurt you and—”

“Y/n!” Max interrupted, clearing his throat so that his voice sounded a lot more normal and less husky. “Honey, you’re not hurting me, just—don’t wiggle around right—there.”

Your eyebrows raised in confusion at his words and your brain couldn’t process what the hell he was saying, so you just opted to nod, leaning forward as far as you could and beginning a conversation with Abi as you tried with every ounce of your being to not put much weight on Max. It took every ounce of concentration that you had to not think about the fact that you were touching the love of your life and focus on Abi’s words about wedding planning, but somehow, you did it. 

“Hey, uh, Jake?” Max suddenly called out, and you noticed that his voice had gone hoarse again and that his tone was tight and clipped. Higher than normal. You frowned; in your conversation with Abi, you had slipped a little further backwards than you’d realized, back into his lap. “How much longer?”

“Thirty minutes,” Jacob growled, and you noticed Emma looking a little offput herself. “It’s looking closer to an hour total at this point.”

“Alright then, we need to stop,” Max insisted and you stifled a pathetic whine, embarrassed that you were this hard to bear just sitting on his lap. It probably didn’t help that you were still actively avoiding any and all contact with him, practically leaving him here in the backseat to talk to himself as you ignored him, anxious and letting Emma’s words get to your head.

You needed to stop. You and Max were friends. Good friends, and you were being absolutely ridiculous about this whole thing. 

Three minutes later, Jacob pulled off at a reststop and you lifted off of Max instantly, watching him scamper out of the car after Abi and Nick and hurrying into the men’s restroom. With everyone out of the car but you and Emma, you climbed over the seats and sat between her seat and the driver’s seat, staring at her with wide eyes.

“So,” you started out, pointedly ignoring the tears in her eyes, knowing she wouldn’t want to talk about it right now. “Your plan to make me sit on Max is not working; I can barely say two words to the guy, and his poor legs are getting crushed by me. He probably can’t think of anything but leg cramps!” 

“Oh, please,” Emma scoffed, dabbing at her eyes with a tissued and waving your worries away with a flick of her hand. “Look at him, and look at you; there must be some other reason he needs a break.”

“Oh yeah?” You fought back, crossing your arms over your chest as you frowned at your friend. “Like what, exactly? It’s not working Emma, you’re miserable up here, and I am back there; we should just switch places. You’re smaller than me.”

“I am not,” Emma sighed.

“All I know is one minute, I can’t sit still, and the next minute, he’s grabbing my hips and telling me to stop wiggling around,” you continued on, as if Emma hadn’t even interjected. “What else could it be if not that I was—”

You instantly stopped talking as Emma looked over to you, mouth opened and eyes glinting with excitement. 

“You poor naive little thing!” She giggled, pulling your arms so that you were practically sitting on her lap. “Y/n, you aren’t hurting him—you’re turning him on and he doesn’t want you to feel it!” 

You felt pinpricks across your face as the entire thing turned white, and you were suddenly feeling a little nauseous. 

“What?” You questioned, shaking your head lutching nervously at your hair. “What? I—no, Max isn’t—he wasn’t—”

“Oh, yes, yes he was,” Emma argued, and there was a light in her eyes that replaced whatever sadness she had been feeling before you came up there to talk to her. “Okay, do exactly as I say; when Max comes back out to the car, sit back on him just like you were that first time. Wiggle around a bit again—”

“What? No!”

“Just trust me—wiggle around a little bit again, then ask him if he wants to watch something with you on your phone. When you turn it on, lean back against him so that your back is arched and he gets a good, full view down your—”

“Okay, and this is where I officially stop you, you are crazy,” you intoned, shaking your head and leaning away from your friend. “Max is not into me—in case you managed to forget about that, babes—and besides, I can’t just show him my boobs, Emma! They’re my—boobs. They’re, like, private.”

“Holy fuck, how are you not a virgin,” Emma groaned, shoving you back towards your seat as she pointed eagerly out of the car. “Okay, babes, here he comes—just trust me, okay?! Do it!” 

You opened your mouth to argue again, but the words fell from your lips as the car door opened and Max poked his head inside, grinning over at you as his eyes darted back and forth between you and Emma. 

“What, uh, what’s going on here?” He asked, and you shot a glare at Emma as she giggled, hiding her face in her shirt and sending an ominous wink your way. You tried as well as you could to tell her to shut up with your eyes, but she ignored you in typical Emma fashion. 

“Nothing,” you replied, shaking your head and sending him a smile. “I was just feeling nervous about getting away this weekend and Emma was talking me down. That’s it.”

“Ah,” Max yawned, heading back to his seat and patting his lap for you to join him. You blushed. “Is that why you’re acting so weird? You haven’t spoken to me for the last, like twenty-five minutes.”

“Yeah, sorry, just nervous,” you insisted, climbing back over Abi’s seat and settling yourself on top of Max’s lap. As you looked up after readjusting, your eyes met Emma’s in the rearview mirror and she nodded, looking from you to Max’s…well…yeah. 

You cleared your throat, feeling the burn of your phone in your pocket as you stared widely back at her, conveying that she was being way too obvious, here. Regardless, a part of you was…curious, now, and with Laura out of the picture and Max completely single, it’s not like a little testing of the waters was inappropriate anymore. What could it hurt, really? Max was too nice to reject you, so if he wasn’t into it, he just wouldn’t say anything and you’d let it go forever. But, if he really was into it—

Well that was the best-case scenario, wasn’t it?

So, you shifted; nothing crazy and nowhere close to grinding—just a small, flick of the hips that brushed right up against his crotch. Max’s breath hitched and you froze, wondering if you’d truly heard that right, completely distracted from the fact that Abi and Nick were re-entering the car and that Jacob was starting it again, getting ready to head on the road once more. 

A hitch of a breath wasn’t enough of a confirmation for you, so you shifted once again, and then again and then again, and this time Max’s hands lifted back up to your hips, grasping for dear life as you settled your ass back down to his crotch, turning your head to watch as his eyes shut tight and he bit his lip.

“Y/n—”

“Do you want to watch part of a movie with me?” You interrupted, watching as Max’s eyes flashed open, a glint of pain underneath them that had you second-guessing what had just happened. Max smiled down at you, though—that brilliant smile that God had blessed him with—and nodded.

You had no idea what you were going to watch, but your fingers worked anyway, hurriedly typing some stupid TikTok compilation that you hoped he wouldn’t get too distracted by. Max laid his chin on your shoulder, his hands that were gripping your waist winding around your front and interlocking as he held you, his face snuggling slightly into your neck.

Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, your mind reiterated as you slowly breathed out, your heart pounding wildly in your chest as you silently prayed that Max couldn’t hear it, and that he couldn’t feel the way that your skin had suddenly heated up and become sweaty. It wasn’t even that cuddling with Max was anything new—as a person, he was a fucking lapdog—but it was the fact that you had never sat on his fucking lap before while cuddling. Never had intentions to turn him on, never gave him this much of a glance down your lowcut shirt—

Y/n, don’t be a pussy, your inner Emma chastised and you shut your eyes tight and sucked in a breath, desperately trying to convince yourself not to go through with this. But damn it—you sort of wanted to and, so far, Max hadn’t shown a single sign that he’d wanted you to sit anywhere else. 

It was halfway through the video that you forgot the rest of the people in the car and arched backward without a minute to second guess yourself, pretending to stretch your arms above your head as you knew you were, successfully, letting Max have a perfect show of your black lacy bra underneath your shirt, and under that, the perfectly rounded mounds of breasts that it pushed up.

You heard a sharp inhale and dared a look at his face; he was as white as a ghost, and even his perfectly placed freckles had gone impossibly paler—and yet his eyes, those gorgeously sea-colored orbs, were still staring down your shirt, transfixed, as he studied your figure. 

“Alright, everybody out!” Jacob suddenly called out, and the two of you jumped, Max’s eyes meeting yours as he was brought back to reality. His eyes, no longer clouded over with lust, widened and a blush spread unevenly across his face as he realized that he’d been caught watching you. “We’re here!”

“Y/n,” Max breathed out, whipping his arms away from you and running nervous hands through his newly cut hair. “Shit, Y/n, I’m so sorry, I—I wasn’t—I mean I was but…” You smiled as he stuttered along, a giggle framing your mouth and escaping out of your lip, causing Max’s gaze to whip back onto you. You couldn’t help it; he was always so damn cute when he was flustered.

“Does it make it any less creepy if I’m aware that staring down your shirt is creepy?” Max asked, equal parts timid and teasing. You laughed aloud at that, the two of you lingering in the backseat of the car while the rest of the party headed out. 

“It’s fine, Max,” you insisted with a shrug and a wink, conveying in every way possible that you weren’t completely innocent here either. “No one wears a bra like this for it not to be seen, sweetheart.” 

The words coming out of your mouth shocked even you, and Max’s entire jaw fell open as he stared at you in complete and utter disbelief. 

“Whoa, Y/n,” he reared away from you, just to get a better look at your face, testing to see if you were saying what he thought that you were saying. His hands found their way to your waist again and he touched you softly, his thumbs running up and down the curves of your hipbones as he stared in wonder down at you. “Are you saying that you wanted me to—”

“Are you two gonna get out of the car, or do you plan on freezing your little asses off all night?!” Jacob called out as he forced open the trunk of the car, staring in disbelief at the two of you still sitting there. You both jumped, eyes turning to Jacob with guilty blushes, and you didn’t waste another second climbing off of Max and over the seats, pushing your way past Jacob and onto the dirt-clodded driveway. 

Taking your bag from your cousin and asking a hurried, “Where’s our cabin again?” You received directions and hurried off in the direction of the cabin that you and Emma were supposed to share, attempting to outrun Max so that he couldn’t question you any further.

What the hell had you been thinking?! You hadn’t, obviously, and you’d let Emma’s skewed opinion get to you. Now, you had to come up with a solution for some serious damage control before Max got to you with his, What’s gotten into you today? And his, Look, I know you must have been kidding, or his I’m sorry Y/n, I’m just not attracted to you that way—

“Fuck,” you muttered to yourself, throwing open the door to the cabin and chucking your suitcase onto the empty bed. Emma was standing on the other side of the room, facing the bathrooms, but she jumped and turned around when she heard the slam of the front door. “Fuck this whole plan, Emma, and fuck my stupid self too. I can’t believe that I actually let myself believe that Max was really into me and I—holy shit, are you crying?!?”

Emma’s pretty hazel eyes were red-rimmed, but the telltale giveaway that she’d been sobbing was the tear tracks of black mascara spreading down her cheeks and clumping up near her pointy chin.

Once her mind had registered your question, she began sobbing once again, her hands coming up to cover her eyes and you ran to her, throwing your arms around her neck and feeling her own arms go around your waist as she sobbed into your neck heartily. 

“Honey, what happened?” You asked, but your voice was muffled by your much taller friend’s collarbone. You pulled away from her and sat her down on her bed, sitting down next to her and taking her hand in yours. “Emma, what did my idiot cousin say to you? You know that big dummy acts completely on emotions, so whatever he said, I’m sure it was just in the heat of the—”

“He meant it,” Emma interrupted you, pulling her hand out of yours and using it to wipe her eyes. “But I don’t even want to talk about it right now, so—tell me what happened with Max.” You opened your mouth to protest but she shot you her “Emma” look—the look that told you that arguing would quite literally be pointless. So, you sighed, letting yourself fall backward onto the bed and groaning as your head hit the awfully lumpy mattress she’d been provided tonight.

“I don’t know what happened, Emma,” you admitted with a whine, feeling her lay down beside you and cuddle her head into yours comfortingly. “It was like I had this sudden, insane boost of confidence and I was like…grinding on him and giving him a full show of my boobs—”

“You do have great boobs—”

“And then when he noticed that I caught him staring at my breasts, I kindofsortofmaybe insinuated that I wanted him to look down my shirt and then he was about to ask me if I really meant that I wanted him to see me naked and then Jacob interrupted us and I freaked out and ran away.”

Emma just stared back at you, blinking occasionally, as if she were really confused.

“Why?” She finally asked, staring down at you in confusion. You blinked back at her, shaking your head bewilderedly. 

“Wait, why what?”

“Why did you run away, you fucking dumbass!” Emma insulted, but it was loving and the two of you laughed as she pushed you off the bed and you squealed. “Seriously, Y/n, what the fuck? You ran away? After doing all of that you just ran?”

“I was scared!” You defend your actions with a hiss, pulling yourself up off of the floor and planting down next to her again. “Fuck, Emma, Max is my best friend. I cannot risk freaking him out and losing him, okay? I just…can’t, okay, he means…he means everything to me, Emma, he’s the most important person in the whole world. He’s my best friend.”

“Ouch,” Emma responded, but there was a fond smile on her face and a happy gleam in her eyes as she gazed down at you. “Babes, you know that you’re the most important thing in the world to him too, right? Even if he didn’t feel the same way about you, he wouldn’t let this ruin your friendship. You know that, right?” 

You shrugged and looked away from her, playing with your hands as you avoided the question. Did you know that? No, not really. Yeah, the two of you were really close, and yeah, he spent most of his free time with you, but that didn’t mean that this wasn’t something that would freak him out enough to ghost you.

“Shit, if I was going to do something as fucking ridiculous as this, I should have just bit the and told him how I felt,” you finally responded with a sigh, pushing yourself off of the bed and shuffling your feet over the cold, hardwood floor. “But you know, maybe this way, there’s some way that I can play it off?”

“Okay babes, I’m just going to say this once and I’m going to say it outright,” Emma cut you off, standing in front of you and forcing your chin up to look your much taller friend in the eyes. “I know why they broke up, Y/n. The real reason, and if you just fucking ask me I will tell you right here, right now.”

The offer was, obviously, tempting; and two or three years ago you’d probably be a lesser person and taken that offer. As it was, though, you valued Max and his privacy, and if he’d wanted you to know, he would have told you himself. 

“No, I don’t want to know,” you insisted, pursing your lips and pulling away from Emma. “It isn’t any of my business, and Max made that abundantly clear by not telling me inthe first place.”

“Of fucking course,” Emma groaned with a shake of her head, rolling her eyes at you and then fixing you with a glare. “The two of you are both so stupid.”

“Gee, thanks Em.” Your words fell flat as you shot her your own sharp look and she gulped, having the common decency to at least look like she felt bad for saying what she did. “Besides, why do you even know the reason Laura dumped him?”

“Laura didn’t dump Max—Max dumped Laura,” Emma clarified and your heart dropped into your stomach. The piece of news, realistically, probably should have made you feel better, but it didn’t. It only made you feel worse, like your heart had been stomped on and used up. Because—if that was true—if Max had dumped Laura—then why had he been so upset that night when he came over to your house? And why the fuck had he lied to you about it?

“What?” You asked, your voice tiny and fragile, and Emma looked back at you, confused. 

“Max broke up with Laura,” Emma repeated, and was somehow completely missing the broken, wounded look that was written all over your face. “He dumped her, because he wasn’t in love with her, Y/n, he realized that he was—”

“Emma.” 

Jacob’s voice pierced through the air, and the two of you jumped towards the sound, to where your cousin was currently glaring daggers towards your best friend. Emma immediately shut up, shooting you a guilty look as she moved farther away from you and towards Jacob. 

“Y/n, can you please give us a moment?” Jacob asked, his throat froggy and having to clear it as he continued staring at Emma. When you saw the raw, heated look pass between them you excused yourself quickly, knowing that whatever feud they were having was about to be made up in tenfold. You forgot to bring your suitcase with you—not even thinking that you’d effectively be kicked out of your cabin for the night—as you ran outside, outside to the nothingness that awaited you.

No, seriously.

There was not a soul out here, Abi and Nick notably missing and Max even nowhere to be seen—not that you even wanted to see him right now anyways. Your heart was barely beating in your chest at the revelation that he’d lied to you—you, supposedly his closest friend—about something that was so huge. Then again, maybe he had no idea how huge it was to you. He didn’t at all, actually, because he had no idea that you were so annoyingly and stupidly in love with him. 

“Fuck this day, and fuck everyone else,” you groaned to yourself as you plopped down on a metal bench under a canopy, covering your eyes with your hands as you whined. 

“That an invitation?” 

Max’s voice sent your blood running cold and you jumped, shocked, turning yourself towards him as he stood slightly behind you, watching you warily. His face was red, but he was smiling at you, and he made his way over and sat at the bench opposite you slowly. 

The two of you stared at each other for a while—one of you, optimistically nervous, and the other of you having had your heart shattered into a million little pieces just ten minutes ago. Neither of you said anything, unsure of what exactly you should say, for a long time until finally, Max broke the silence.

“Y/n,” Max spoke, clearing his throat from the nervousness that threatened to choke and overtake him. “About what you said in the car—”

“You lied to me.” 

You hadn’t intended for it to come out like that, but there it was, and there was no taking it back now. 

Max reared back, astonishment registering across his perfect features. 

“I—what?” He shook his head back and forth, as if he couldn’t quite comprehend what you were saying. “I lied about—about the car?”

“No Max, not about the fucking car!” You swore, rising from your seat in your anger. Max followed quickly, a gentle hand on your elbow that you quickly ripped out of his grasp. “You lied to me about—about Laura! You told me that she—that she broke up with you, Max! You were heartbroken, you were crying, you lied!” 

You thought that there were tears streaming down your face but you couldn’t really tell at the moment. All you could feel was the adrenaline that was being fueled by your anger, and all you could see was the shock that hadn’t left Max’s face since you’d first spoken. 

“Who told you that?” Max questioned, and the fact that he wasn’t denying it made you even more upset and you huffed, turning around on one heel and heading towards—fuck, you had absolutely nowhere to go.

“Does it matter?” You answered, turning back around and accepting the fact that the only way you were going to get to be alone was if Max went back to his cabin and left you here and, knowing him, that wasn’t likely to happen. “You lied, Max. And I’m pissed about it. That’s the only thing that you should care about.”

You still hadn’t turned around to face him, so he made his way in front of you instead, placing tentative hands on both of your arms and levelling his face with yours. 

“Sweetheart, please look at me.” Fuck; you were weak anytime that Max called you sweetheart and you knew that he knew it, too. Hating yourself just a little bit more for it, you looked up at him, unaware of how your big, sad eyes caused every cell in his body to melt. 

“Why did you lie to me?” The question slipped through your lips without your consent and Max sighed, releasing your arms and pressing a hand into your hip so that you couldn’t get away again. 

“I didn’t want to hurt you,” Max answered simply and you reared back, out of his touch, away from his hold, as you scoffed in response.

“You didn’t want to hurt me?” You shrieked, pulling farther away from him and pushing your hands out in front of you to stop him when he tried to reach out for you again. “What the fuck—how the fuck would that have hurt me, Max?”

Max winced, running a nervous hand through his hair, and inspected his surroundings, as if he wished somebody else would come out any minute now. 

“Y/n, you are my best friend,” Max pleaded, and you could see the desperation in his eyes but you had no idea why he was so upset. “You know me better than anybody else in this entire world, honey, please—can you give me the benefit of the doubt on this one? Can you let me tell you when I’m ready?”

“No, Max, obviously I cannot do that because obviously it has something to do with me!” You retorted sharply, angry tears burning hot at the corners of your eyes, hotter than normal, devastated tears. “Like—what is going on, Max? I hae this feeling that everybody’s in on this secret, everybody but me—and I should know it, I should know what’s going on with you—”

“Y/n, sweetheart!” Max interrupted again, and this time, he successfully gathered your hands into his. “Look, I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry that I lied—really I am, but—why is it so important to you?” You glared back at him, pulling your hands out of his grasp and beginning to walk away from him. “Why is it such a big deal that I didn’t tell you the whole truth?”

“Because I’m in love with you, you idiot!” You screamed back at him, your body turning back around on its own accord as the screech left your mouth. You both heard the words echo against a canyon somewhere, and you blanched, unaware of what you’d actually said and the weight of them until they hit you in the chest on the reverb.

Max’s mouth had dropped open and he stepped away from you in shock, his hands coming up to frame his cheeks, never making actual physical contact with his face. He stared back at you, his eyes wide and full of wonder, as if he were seeing you for the first time, all over again. 

“You’re—” Max gulped, but he took a step closer to you, a smile adorning his freckled cheeks. “You’re in love with me? Really?”

Your heart sunk again when he spoke and you shook your head, backing away from him and pressing two fingers to the bridge of your nose as you suddenly felt an oncoming migraine. 

“I’m sorry Max,” you apologized, feeling a bout of nausea spring up in your stomach as you realized that you’d just past the point of no return. “Shit, I’m so sorry, I should have never even said anything—I should have let it go—”

“I broke up with Laura because I’m in love with you.”

The words came out quickly, like Max was afraid that if he hadn’t said them as quickly as he did that he wouldn’t say them at all. You reaction was surprisingly slow compared to everything else you’d done in haste tonight, and you dropped your hands from your face and gazed up at the man in front of you, who was staring back at you with awe. 

“W—what?”

“I love you,” Max repeated, taking another step towards you with his light, airy chuckle that you loved so damn much. “And I didn’t tell you that night I broke up with Laura because I thought that you’d think I was lying, or that you were a rebound, and you’re not, Y/n. You’re absolutely not—I’ve loved you for a long enough time that I’m a total asshole for letting it go on with Laura for as long as I did.”

“Then why—why did you—”

“I lied because I didn’t want you to think that any of this was your fault,” Max continued, and he was so close now that his arms were winding around your waist and his forehead was pressed to yours. “I just—I knew, the second I saw you again in that coffee shop, that it was fate. And I lied to myself, hoping that my relationship would just fizzle out on its own and that I wouldn’t have to hurt anyone but—fuck, I would break Laura’s heart a thousand times over if it meant that I might get to be with you in the end,” Max finished, and you were stunned silent, unaware of how to speak anymore. 

“Do I—” Max took a sharp inhale of breath and a step back to assess your face. “Do I get you in the end?”

You smiled back at him before pressing your lips so tightly to his, wrapping your body so hard around his own, that the two of you could barely breathe in anything that wasn’t lingering on each other’s bodies. 

“You had me,” you answered in between breathless kisses, in between promises, in between hopeful smiles. “You had me at the beginning.”

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@house-of-kolchek @lorebite @yeslieutenant @kassiekolchek22 @buttermykolchek @kawaiiwitch224 @ageofbajabule

[mayabruhbruh]

props to @causeineedu for making this amazing analysis.

(Sorry y’all, this is gonna be a bit of a long one, but hopefully I’m onto something with this! Stay tuned pls lmfao)

Most of what you said is a perfect reflection of what I hope the Duffers want us to see.

The pained looks on El’s face when Mike talks, the vines tightening with every lie he tells, the lightning and the unrealistic thunder striking/booming simultaneously to indicate lies. Brilliant.

I think it definitely may have been purposeful that Mike’s monologue felt rushed coming from him, because of his frantic state, his weird “fight, fight, fight” (which -might I add- threw away all sense of cuteness I might have felt watching for the first time (seriously it felt so weird😭)) I think he definitely was rambling things he thought El would want to hear. Things he thought could make her stronger. I don’t think it did though.

Like you said, when she turned to Max, saw her struggle and in pain. I think it was meant to be a similar parallel to when Venca had Max in that same position in Dear Billy and, with the nice memory of El coming back to her to finally snap her out of it, she got out of his clutches and was able to escape. Same with El. I never thought I’d be convinced of Elmax in my life until I watched volume 2. It’s oddly telling, how Max was able to break her into hero mode, her life in danger with no idea El is even there with her, rather than her own boyfriend, who was saying the words she’d been begging him to say from the start. Now, I’m not saying Stranger Things is taking a full turn to the queerest story ever heard, but that’s kind of what I’m saying.

Lmfao jk, I think what it means, or what it’s trying to say, is that romantic love isn’t what will help El. It shouldn’t have to be be. Familial love, platonic love, all that jazz, it’s what helped her fight Vecna. 001 said it himself when he tried helping her escape, a memory that made him angry gave him the fuel to be strong in his powers. El tried that, but it was self-destructive in itself. The idea of her mom not being able to get to her, them hiding her away, abusing her, etc. strengthened her for a good deal of time, but it wasn’t the best way. No, alternatively: Positive memories of her mom helped her kill him the first time.

THATS the message with this whole ordeal. Positive memories are stronger than whatever the hell Vecna thinks about to strengthen himself. Assuming he thinks of how much he hates his family, or the world to make his powers stronger, that isn’t the solution.

It’s love.

It’s what we all jokingly thought this would all come down to in the end. It’s cheesy, its stupid, it’s cute, its genius, it’s Stranger Things.

There are plenty of examples of this within the show, such as Billy and his lifelong experience with hate and anger, suddenly being turned around into near-redemption when El brought in the recollection of his mother. The good memories. Will, how they attempted to snap him out of the Mind Flayer’s grasp by reminding him of memories that were happy, that defined him in the most positive sense. Hopper, his descent into groggy, day-drunk cop after Sarah’s death. El coming in and saving him from despair, reminding him every day of what there is to be happy about in the present. She turned Sarah into a happy memory rather than one that he wanted to forget. It’s all here.

There has to be more. I don’t know, I might sound crazy, but moral of the story, it shouldn’t have to be a fake romantic confession to get her the strength to fight on. Just like Hopper, just like Billy, Will, and more characters that I can’t think of right now, just like them, she needed love PERIOD. Love in general, no? It’s insulting to think Mike finally saying it- which we could tell she didn’t believe— would help her. It was the memory of Max, her unconditional love and support despite initial differences. It makes me so happy to think about. Which is why it worked. Why she was able to defeat him and win… momentarily.

Someone pls save me from this delusion. Idk if I’m making any sense!

[detectivemarvelingcomics]

Could you do some hcs for dating the teen titans?

Yes I can!! I just got HBO Max so I’ve been binging both the animated and the live action series haha 😂 Thank you so much for being my first request!

Also I’m guessing you’re referring to the original teen titans, so if you want the new teen titans just shoot me another request!

Dating the Teen Titans Would Include...

No Specified AU

TW: Language

Genre: Fluff

[DC Masterlist]

Word Count: 2.0K (About 0.2K per Titan)

Dick Grayson

You must have an insane amount of patience, truly, to be able to date Dick Grayson

If the joke book he probably carries around isn’t enough, I would’ve been certain that the ego would drive you away but nope you’re still here

And that’s how you both knew that it was true fucking love you’re both inseparable and the Titans know it.

To put things simply... he loves you and the Titans fear you.

While you’re both somewhat easygoing and hospitable, one would do well not to piss off one or the other because you both come as a package deal and you can kick ass when necessary you just choose not to embarrass Dick like that because you could totally outmatch him.

Don’t ask him that though he’d insist that he’d win.

Best not bring up the first time you met or else the Titans would never let him live it down

But in all seriousness, I see the relationship as rather lighthearted and enjoyable, maybe a bit spontaneous too. Want to go to the beach? Done. Want to kick some ass in Gotham? For sure. It’s like a match made in heaven.

Not to mention that the Titans rather look up to you, which is a definite plus. Not just anyone can date the Dick Grayson.

Wally West

As opposed to popular opinion... I’d think that this is a rather slow relationship. 

Speedsters are more than just familiar with how life just flashes by so I think Wally would like to enjoy the relationship at a slower pace, he wants it to last as long as possible.

With that said, you’re both menaces. His speed combined with your cleverness? No one is safe and the Titans know it.

The best moment of your relationship, although this is debatable, was when you and Wally successfully turned the Titan tower into an all-out prank minefield. Trash cans were covered with plastic, buckets of water places on doorways, even wardrobes were switched.

And all done in ten seconds, impressive. Nothing quite like starting a war in the Tower then grabbing burgers after, right?

Kind of cheesy but I can see you both having frequent movie nights that differ in genre according to month. You both probably rotate on who chooses the movie too.

Overall I think you both have a lot of fun together, if I were to compare the “vibes” to something, I would say a summer relationship (that obviously lasts longer than just a summer) where everything is just living life as it goes

Nah because like I said before you guys don’t want to rush things, and you’re always there to remind Wally to just slow down every now and then.

I should probably mention that this is a competitive relationship too, before I go, not everything’s a competition but everything’s a competition, you know? It’s a shame that the Titans often get caught in the cross fire though-

Donna Troy

Oh this one’s fun. Donna’s new to this whole “rest of the world” stuff but luckily she has a wonderful partner who’s willing to teach her everything.

A lot of the relationship consists of you explaining things, but it’s kind of endearing despite Donna’s headstrong attitude towards anything

But Donna is also the kind to be open to learning new things, and you’re open to trying new things. It works like clockwork, you’re both young and willing.

Now these “things” can range from baking cookies to extreme mountain climbing so be prepared for anything in this relationship.

Overall I think the Titans see you both as a really cute relationship, one that anyone could be slightly envious of and one that they’re glad that exists

But despite this loving relationship I think you’d both be absolute machines in a battle, I think one thing that is important to Donna is ultimately respect for each other’s abilities, having grown up on Themyscira and all, and maybe that one battle where you absolutely demolished the enemy was when she really caught interest.

Or not. It could’ve also been when you mistakenly ran into one of the glass walls in the tower and she developed a crush over you while you mumbled a series of curses.

This relationship is strongly built on loyalty, so I think you both would be describes as a pair of ride-or-dies who typically tend to lean towards the latter, especially when trying the more extreme things that Donna asked you about.

But overall I think it’s a really sweet relationship with few bumps, they’re still there but I mean that you’re both good at working through them.

Victor Stone

I feel like this relationship is very classical high school romance, you know?

Like walking to class together, holding each other’s books, stuff like that.

But on the other hand I feel like you’re both a very fun couple to be around, like you know how when you’re with some couples it feels like you’re third wheeling? Not these two. You feel like you’re part of the crew

You guys probably switch between fun couple and parent couple every now and then, I can see the Titans relying on both of you a lot for different things.

You and Victor are definitely the type to play games to determine who buys food, like things as simple as rock-paper-scissors to things as complicated as 8-Ball, and so far you’ve been winning at a ratio of 3:1.

Definitely a very trusting relationship, I feel like you both reach that comfortable stage faster than most, but it feels right, you know? I think you’d both understand that relationships go both ways.

There are probably times where you’re both in a teasing mode too, I think, but they’re mostly light hearted pranks, definitely not anything in the realm of what Wally would do

I kinda want to say that you’re a very active couple in that you both like to go to the gym together and idk take hikes together but at the same time I also want to say that you’re both inclined to stay home and play video games so I guess it’s like a 50/50

I can also see Victor being the type to do small acts of generosity as opposed to like buying gifts to show his appreciation for you, like I feel like he’s more inclined to help you with small tasks when he knows you need it, you know? Overall very cute, hehe

Raven (Rachel Roth)

Now this one’s interesting, you and Raven are certainly an interesting duo, but the most interesting thing would likely be how you met. Let’s say it involved a blood sacrifice, a bat, and a very old bicycle.

No you weren’t trying to summon her someone else was you just ended up being at the wrong place at the wrong time anyway moving on

You’re both the perfect example of opposites attract for more reasons than just one. 

But what makes it better is that you’re always open and willing to learn and understand many of the things that Raven does and she appreciates it a lot

It goes both ways also! She’s always willing to do whatever you ask her to and you both end up having at least some fun even if it happens to be something she isn’t used to.

Random, but I think a favorite pass time for both of you is simply sitting in her room and reading books, weird, I know, but like there’s something inherently romantic about either of you excitedly showing the other a certain passage you both enjoyed or telling them about your book, it’s just so sweet.

She definitely has a personal bias towards you, obviously, Garfield can say a joke and she’d stare at him with a straight face but you could say the exact same joke probably right after him and she would crack a smile and she probably does that on purpose but it still feels nice

You also may or may not have caught on to her incantations and now you may or may not be able to perform these spells but you haven’t tried because you wouldn’t know how to but it’s just telling of how much time you spent together.

I only mention this because there was an event in which you corrected her incantation and suddenly hell fire appeared which she had to figure out how to get rid of and since then you both mutually agreed to both (a) not tell the Titans and (b) not say incantations out loud

Koriand’r (Starfire)

STOP YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE anyway you’re definitely both kinds to see beauty in everything

Maybe this relationship is rather dangerous considering you’re both curious people and Kori happens to be able to shoot lasers out of her eyes so maybe you should both be just a little more careful

You’re both probably very doting on both each other and the rest of the Titans and although you’re both well intentioned it has become a case of “oh no there’s two of them” but in like a teasing way

I feel like Kori is very open to sharing a lot of aspects about her culture with you, and you have always found Tamaran culture to be beautiful so it fits

Likewise you share a lot of things about your culture too and you both bond over finding ways to combine them together to make a nice fusion of understandings and it’s all a sweet combination

See a big thing about this relationship if that you both put your everything into it, it is an equal push and equal pull kind of thing where you both love each other with everything that you have and it creates this unbreakable bond that even non-supers have come to acknowledge

Though this also results in the both of you frequently being in your own world even when others are around and that’s something you both promised to fix but yeah...

It’s coming around, don’t worry. You’re both making active efforts but sometimes it just slips your mind and whoops

Now this should go without saying but this trust often leads to powerful combinations when in missions, you’re both fiercely loyal to each other and this often plays in overall favor so all is well

Garfield Logan

This is a fun relationship, definitely, and one that’s also very fulfilling.

You’re both definitely an outdoorsy couple, things like hikes, nature walks (which I guess is also a hike but I’ve been told otherwise), trips to the zoo, etc. but this all just builds the relationship

Also a very sweet one! You both have an unlimited amount of energy and love that you’re often expending said energy volunteering somewhere and helping others out

But when it boils down you’re both also very touchy, I think, you both like being together at all times and cuddles are a frequent occurrence but at the will of the other Titans you both do this in privacy

I also feel like this sweetness can also “flip,” so to say. As in if someone messes with either of you in the relationship the other will come running regardless of whether or not they could do anything about it.

To put it short, you both have each other’s back all the time. Literally, like I said you’re both inseparable. 

Despite these I think the relationship would actually be rather lowkey, I don’t think he would be the type to constantly showcase the relationship. I think he’d mention it like once to get it out there but after that he wouldn’t flaunt you around.

I just think that Garfield, even with his usual out and about behavior, is rather modest when it comes to this topic because you’re more to him than just someone to show off, you’re someone who’s important to him and overall he just wants you to be comfortable

If there’s one flaw in this relationship it’s that when you have arguments it’s just horrible, but also rather comedic. Neither of you talk to the other but you both end up still being in the same room together subconsciously. It’s kind of awkward but the coincidences are what makes the other Titans laugh and honestly you both make up within, like, a day or something.

[metalheadcowboy]

“What whore gave you those?”

Billy’s attention was brought away from his plate and up towards Neil who was sitting across the table from him, giving him a cocky, yet cold stare.

His chewing slowed as a look of confusion crept into his face, “Gave me what?“ He questioned, but not before swallowing his mouthful of peas.

Max’s eyes were shifting between the two as they talked, but Susan kept to herself, she knew better.

”The hickeys, son.” And Billy could feel the way his face turned crimson, immediately shying away to look down at his plate instead of facing his father.

Because he knew it was no school whore that gave him those love bites. No girl that sucked off guys in the bathroom just because she liked giving blowjobs. It was Steve Harrington, Steve mother fucking Harrington. Steve who has commitment issues, Steve who likes leaving loving bruises on him as a way to tell everybody else to ‘back off‘ because he cant risk what happened between Nancy and Jonathan happening again. And Billy who was too scared of loosing him to deny them.

He simply shrugged, fork playing with his mashed potato’s knowing damn well that question just took away any appetite he had to finish them.

“Don’t remember,” Neil started, Billy sensing the rising anger in his voice, “Or are you just not gonna tell me?”

Billy didn’t even begin to know what to say. He was starting to think that he should have just gone with saying it was some girl he took down to the quarry instead of sitting there in silence making himself look more and more suspicious by the second.

”Well, what is it Billy?” Billy felt like the walls of their quaint kitchen were closing in more and more, pushing him and Neil closer and closer with each new demand, and the outcome wasn’t looking bright at all.

Suddenly Neil slammed the back of his fist into the solid wood of the table, sound echoing through the house, “Spit it out!” Out of the corner of his eye Billy could see the way Susan flinched at the movement of his fathers hand. He hated that.

“I don’t know!” Billy yelled, finally looking up to meet his father’s gaze, the two sets of ocean blue eyes colliding to create a deadly typhoon, “I can’t- I just- fuck!“

Billy just wanted to stand up and flip the damn table with rage, or maybe twine his fingers into his hair and rip it out in big, chunky fistfuls. He just needed some way of getting out his anger before he did something she knew he’d regret.

”You’re always sticking your damn nose in my business, maybe just for once butt out and let me live!” The look on Neil’s face was truly priceless. Billy honestly felt like one of those prissy spoiled popular girls in one of those cheesy high school movies, but in the most gratifying way.

As soon as Neil got past his initial shock, he went straight to pissed. Like father, like son, or whatever the saying was. The second Billy’s words left his mouth his father, pushed himself up from the table, chair flying back with the momentum from his thighs straightening up.

”You’re my son, I have every right to know anything about your life I damn well please, William!” he countered and Billy honest to God snarled.

This is where things took a turn for the worse, where Billy’s bark became a bit too much for his bite, “Steve’s dad doesn’t give a shit so why do you?” Oops.

Neil‘s face dropped as the puzzle pieces clicked inside of his head. Billy had fucked up and his body language was showing it. His shoulders hunched, his eyes had widened and suddenly his hands were gripping the table with more force than ever before.

”Don’t tell me...” Neil almost sounded like he didn’t want to believe it himself, “Harrington’s kid...”

Now Susan was in full panic mode, rounding the table quickly to grab Max and pull her into the back hallways, into her room where she wouldn’t be harmed by whatever was going on in the kitchen. But Max didn’t let herself be pulled much farther than the entrance to the living room.

”Dad, please...” He was desperate now, using any language that would get him brownie points, or at least maybe keep Neil from skinning him alive.

Neil took no mercy, moving to charge head on into Billy, pinning him right up against Susan’s spice rack, paprika and thyme both hitting Billy in the head before he could even think about what was happening.

”You let that little fag do this to you, Billy? I thought you were better, I thought- I thought we were fucking through with this queer bullshit!” He spat, Billy’s whole body tensed as he prepared for the worst, but didn’t give up just yet.

“And I thought you were done beating up on me after Hopper gave you a warning, but I guess were were both wrong-“ Billy had a grin on his face, even after Neil slapped him with all the force in his body. He had to bite his lip not to fucking bust out laughing because for once he was sticking it to him, not backing down from the man he had been petrified of for his entire existence.

”Eight months, we’ve been fucking for eight months now,” Billy announced with full confidence, hearing a broken off sob from Susan in the background, “Damn good too, biggest dick I ever did see, daddy-“

Neil didn’t look like he knew how to process any of this, like his brain was short circuiting inside of his skull.

”Ah!” He yelled loud and proud right into Billy’s face, breath stinking of cigarettes and under seasoned chicken, “Get out!”

Neil pushed him back into the spice rack harder, his skull letting off a thick cracking noise when it hit one of the solid wood shelves, “Get the fuck out you faggot!”

The words felt blurry and distant from him after that last blow, but he could make them out. And oddly enough he felt sad. A feeling he never thought he’d feel finally getting away from Neil, but he did, he really did. Because his stupid self thought that there might be a chance, just a little one, that Neil would put having his son over disowning him for his sexuality. But now his true colors were showing and it hurt.

His eyes welled up with tears, both from fear and hurt as he was pushed away and onto the floor, landing flat on his ass.

“Get out of my goddamn house!” And Billy didn‘t really need to be told twice. He didn’t even think about his keys, or his jacket, or hell, even shoes as he pushed himself up and ran out of the front door.

The distant yells of vulgar words and harsh farewells from Neil we’re merely background noise to the full on sobs that were wracking his body as he ran down the street. Breaking him down piece by piece until he couldn’t even stand on his own two feet.

That was the night that Billy, king of the fucking world, was knocked down from his pedestal and onto his knees. The night he looked up to the sky and screamed, just screamed because somehow freedom felt worse than suffocating in that old house on Cherry Road.

[tf2workbench]

Dr. Frankenstein

Those of you who play Mann vs. Machine might know that, in that mode, the Medic can resurrect dead players. As with most things from MvM, there’s a good chance I’m going to try to port it to player-versus-player gameplay. And guess what: I’m doing that right now!

Are you concerned about how I might handle this extremely powerful attribute? Well, so am I! Let’s figure it out together, shall we?

Reanimator Iteration 1 Medigun (+) If your healing target dies, they drop a reanimator, which allows you to resurrect them by refilling their health gauge (+) +400% reanimation rate when Ubercharged (-) -25% maximum overheal (-) -15% heal rate on recently-wounded targets or when reanimating (reanimating cannot benefit from critical heals)

Note that targets with gauges (e.g. Ubercharge) are reset. You can, however, still gain Ubercharge while reanimating.

You’ll notice that I made the heal rate relatively low (20 health per second) on targets who are being reanimated, with the exception of the Ubercharge. This means that reviving a target is a significant investment - fifteen seconds for a Heavy, for example. Actually, that’s longer than some respawn timers, meaning that you might end up wasting your healing if you pick the wrong target.

It also begs the question: why are you reviving a single target instead of 1) healing your nearby, living teammates or 2) running away from the people who killed your healing target? Are they that important? If they’re another Medic or possibly Engineer, maybe they are. But if they’re your average power class, probably not.

Death is also an emotionally charged kind of thing (in real life, but also in TF2). I wonder if this would lead to situations like “oh, the medic ignored me so I didn’t get a chance at reanimation” or “the medic ran away instead of reanimating me.” It’s not the primary problem with the weapon, but these kinds of things should be considered.

With that in mind, I’m shifting focus, instead working on a passive secondary for a common Medic buddy: the Heavy.

Reanimator Iteration 2 Heavy secondary (passive) (+) On death: Drop a reanimator, allowing friendly Medics to revive you (normal healing rates apply) (+) Charged by dealing damage. At 300 damage, the reanimator is available; you reanimate 25% faster for every 100 damage you deal after that (max of +100%). (-) -40% healing from health packs (-) No active weapon

Loosely based on an old Advanced Weaponiser design, actually. The glaring flaw with this weapon is that it only works when you have a nearby Medic; otherwise it’s just useless.

It may also be violently disruptive to the flow of the game. Once you deal enough damage (which is pretty doable for a Heavy) you have the equivalent of a faster, Medic-activated teleporter just for yourself. And, as with the medigun above, there’s the question: are you important enough to justify the Medic standing around reviving you?

Let’s (regretfully) cut the Medic out of this equation entirely.

Reanimator Iteration 3 Heavy secondary (passive) (+) Charged by dealing damage (activates at 200, caps out at 1000) (+) For each 100 damage after 200: respawn one second faster (+) For each 100 damage after 200: gain one second of speed boost on respawning (-) No active weapon

My main beef with this weapon is that it’s only useful if you actually die, which is not a guarantee. Dying usually means you’ve failed, and there’s very little you can do to make it less painful; the only real thing would be a teleporter line, which is well-balanced-for already. This would require extensive playtesting and might end up feeling like a bit cheesy to the opposing team, in the vein of “I just killed that guy, why is he back already.” Cheating death is like that; it can make your opponents feel helpless. 

Remember, too, that respawn differs based on your team; defending teams on Payload or Attack/Defense maps tend to have longer respawn times than the attackers. A small thing to take into account.

Let’s go back to the Medic for one last look at this deeply questionable, but interesting, idea.

Reanimator Iteration 4 Medic melee (+) If you die with 75% or higher Ubercharge: reanimate after two seconds (+) Gain speed boost upon reanimation (duration corresponding to Ubercharge you had) (-) Lose all Ubercharge upon reanimating (-) -40% damage

I like this idea, especially because it can really benefit your team. On the other hand, it’s a passive melee, meaning you get this benefit no matter what - and since it’s such valuable insurance, it’s automatically an option on the table when you select a melee. On the other hand, keeping it at 75% Uber and above means you actually have to stay alive for a while to reap the benefits.

I’m leery of it, really. Killing a Medic is supposed to represent a window of opportunity for your team, which is somewhat irrelevant if he pops back up again and runs back to his allies. There’s also not much you can do to keep him from reaching 75% charge during setup time, especially with a faster-charging gun like the Vaccinator.

Oh well. It’s still a cool idea, even if people who play on instant-respawn servers won’t be using it.

[newcaptainofsquad9]

Dating Park Jihyo Would Include..(Twice)

-Here’s some Twice content! All fictional of course (this lady is completely taken, but some of ya’ll stay wildin on this site so I have to put this disclaimer out there). I’ll write for the rest of Twice too, I’ll keep you posted! Hope you enjoy! Let me know how this goes. Hope you enjoy! :)

• You both met at a fansign

• You weren’t a super fan of Twice, but your friend dragged you along anyway. 

• Jihyo was in between Jeongyeon and Sana when she saw you, and couldn’t stop smiling. 

• She fell into a casual conversation and was rather touchy with your hands, which made you blush as Sana and Jeongyeon took notice. 

• The managers began to move you along, but Jihyo didn’t want your time to end, so she scribbled down her number in your album quickly and secretly with a wink.

•You didn’t call her until the next day, afraid that she was just being nice but when she picked up you were relived. 

•Jihyo was super nervous.

• She rambled about how much she thought she overstepped, but you reassured her and told her that she was even more beautiful in person.

• She mumbled a thank you before you both spoke all day, until she had to go.

• You both talked a lot, which was mostly over the phone since she was busy being the leader of one of the biggest girl groups. 

• Jihyo always send you words of encouragement to start your day, along with flirty remarks once she got comfortable talking to you. 

• Once Twice was able to get a break you went on your first date with her. 

• She had to invite you over to the dorm because her privacy is important to her, the same with your own. 

• You were practically interrogated by Twice. They wanted to know exactly what your intentions were with their leader. 

• Jihyo laughed through it but not without sending death glares to the members who over did it at times. Nayeon especially 

• She defended you at times with a hand on your arm or even thigh when she was bold enough. 

• She listened to you and appreciated how respectful you were with her and above all the rest of Twice. 

• When you both were finally alone the both of you cuddled up and discussed how the day went. 

• You answered honestly, Jihyo attentive to each and every word. 

• When you asked her how her day went her answer was rather cheesy.

• “It got ten times better when you came over.” 

• “Really?” you asked. 

• Jihyo nodded, then kissed you. 

• You froze for a moment, the gesture sending her into a panic as she pulled away. 

• “That was too fast wasn’t it. Y/N I’m so-”

• You pulled her back towards your lips, shutting her up as she eases back into a deeper kiss. 

• The both of you became official after a few weeks. 

• Jihyo even added you to Twice’s groupchat, which she regretted immediately when she couldn’t here the end of her bandmates teasing.

• She already got enough of it when she let them know you both were dating. 

• “At least I have a girlfriend,” she declared in God Jihyo fashion.

• That shut them up real quick.

• Whenever she had to go on tour she’d leave voice messages for you telling you good morning or good night, depending on what time zone you were in.

• She urged to call you, but didn’t want to disturb your sleep if it was too early.

• Is the type of girlfriend to let you know you’re beautiful each day, no matter how redundant it gets. 

• If you’re feeling low she sends you an extra long voice message and a captioned selfie to let you know you aren’t alone. 

• If you disagree with any of her words she’ll go into leader mode to let you know otherwise.

• It won’t be overbearing, but she’s willing to debate for hours on how you’re the most perfect woman in the world. 

• She said I love you first after the last day of a draining concert with tears clinging to her face and voice breaking. 

• When you said it back she laughed like she couldn’t believe it. 

• Will ask if you have any issues with her performances, or even voice at times. She wants you to be involved in some way. 

• Loves to practice choreography with you, and enjoys it when you complement her on it. (more on that soon)

• She also manages to snag you any merch you want from her tours or promotions if you liked any of them. 

• When you both make public appearances together, she goes incognito for your protection.

• Holds onto your hand tightly and will defend you from anything and anyone.  

NSFW 18 + From Here On

• Is a dom (I don’t make up the rules)

• They call her God Jihyo for a reason ok. 

• She teases you whenever you find a particular stage or show of hers attractive.

• “Oh, you liked that part in More and More I see. Ok jagi.” (if you know you know)

• Is the type to tease you around her members when they’re occupied with something. 

• She always wants you to sit in her lap to the point where she expects you there whenever you spend time together.

• Loves to make out with you pressed against her chest, lips going everywhere and her hand down your pants. 

• Makes you squirm with a husky whisper, loves to here you beg when she slows down her movements. 

• You called her goddess in bed one time and she never lived it down. 

• Will press you against the wall or bed and kiss down your neck until you call her that again. 

• “Come on jagi, you know what to call me.”

• She can be extremely soft too. 

• She’s one of the best leaders in kpop for a reason, you don’t get there being assertive all the time. 

•If you’re having a bad day she’ll go at your pace, whispering soft words of reassurance as you’re at the edge.

• “You feel so good around me, let go. I’m right there with you.”

• “It’s just you and me jagi. Focus on me.”

• “Talk to me, is that how you want it?”

• Aftercare is huge for her. 

• Will ask how everything was, if she did ok and more importantly if you’re ok.

• She doesn’t get jealous, but if Sana or Momo (you know the top flirts) get too close with you at times she will remind you who you’re with real quick. 

•This usually involves rough sex and dirty talk to the max. 

• Aftercare she’ll be extra tentative with cuddles, water, snacks etc. 

• “Was that ok?”

• “I didn’t mean to leave that many bruises. I’m sorry.”

• The small amount of times she does let you dom she’s loud. (she’s a main vocalist so... yeah)

• Will let you know exactly how she wants things to go and doesn’t mind if you like to experiment every now and then. 

• Pillowtalk is extremely intimate, Jihyo lays out a lot of her insecurities and she feels protected with you and you feel the same. 

[aclosetfan]

Lmaooo some of you already know i live for tough girl Buttercup. I love love love how people have developed her into someone who kicks ass, takes names, and looks good doing it. She’s a one-liner queen 👸, doesn’t take lip, and make a sailor blush!! There’s no way she’d ever be soft! No way!!!!

Except, SIKE, you already know I don’t mess around with that one dimensional bs because every tough girl’s a little soft in the middle

Don’t get me wrong, Buttercup’s tough, but that just a defense mechanism. she cares a little too much about what other people think of her, so she tries to build walls. Can’t blame her, last time she easily allowed people in, she was chased to a meteor. That does shit to a kid.

On one hand, she really likes the superhero gig. On the other, she’s so eager for people to threat her like a normal person that when she was little, in an effort to fit in, she ended up bullying pasty little Elmer, but we all know how that worked out 🤷‍♀️ the guilt still eats her up alive, so she ends up being president of the Bully Patrol Squad at her elementary/middle/and high school. It’s her self-imposed, never ending penance.

When she grows up and fully matures, she’s overly apologetic about everything. It’s the “I use to be an aggressive kid” instinct. She may not come out and say it all the time, but you know when Buttercup’s feeling sorry. Don’t believe me on this one? Watch the movie (after she lands the first punch on the gorilla) AND anytime she has to apologize to Bubbles/Blossom in the show.

She still has a bad habit of acting cool in front of new people (it those defense mechanisms dude). In reality, though, out of the three sisters, Buttercup’s actually the shy one. Bubbles and Blossom were given their names for a reason. They’re the outgoing mouth pieces, not her. But cool kids don’t have to say much to be cool, so people tend not to notice

Take a moment to get to know her though, and Buttercup’s dorky personality really shines through. She’s that one kid who knows too much about pro-wrestling, religiously keeps a fantasy football team, and still watches Saturday morning cartoons.

“We’re not keeping that stinky fleabag.” She pauses, looking down at the kitten as it plays with her yo-yo, and the sour expression on her face softens, “Because I’m gonna end up feeding it, and cleaning it, and loving it.” REAL dialogue people!!! REAL dialogue from the show that should persuade you that it is not Blossom or Bubbles who is the Mom Friend(tm) but in fact one Buttercup Utonium!!!!! (fact check me, I dare you)

She may be the “tomboy” of the trio, but Buttercup can’t stand bugs and that doesn’t go away as she gets older. Spiders are public enemy number uno. She screams like a baby if she ever accidentally walks through a spider web and an actual encounter with the bug? Oof she books it out of the city.

Happy and gigglely when drunk and it scares everyone but her sisters (they have no idea why people think she’s so intimidating otherwise, BC’s always happy and gigglely to them). The real her really comes out when she switches off hero mode and allows herself to have fun

Daddy’s girl for life

Every birthday Professor gives her a bouquet of buttercups. Every birthday she rolls her eyes and sighs, but when no one’s looking she stuffs her face in the bouquet, takes a deep breath, and keeps the damn things alive for as long as possible

So, sue her. She likes buttercups. It’s still a stupid name. It spawns a horrible amount of cheesy nicknames and really impedes on her tough-girl persona!!! You can’t be tough and be named after a flower!! Everyone knows that! Anyway, buttercups are pretty and she’s not very pretty, but sometimes she likes to think that maybe someday, maybe, someone will think she’s pretty like the flowers too

The idea makes her giggle. In fact, any romantic thought or feeling makes her giggle. If she giggles at something you’ve said? Watch out friend, she’s got it bad for you. Her sisters tease her relentlessly for this “character flaw”

Yes. Obviously, physical touch and quality time are her love languages. Yes. Obviously, the idea of physical touch and quality time embarrass her to no end. And NO play fighting with someone is not “basically the same thing,” stfu Bubbles.

But whose to say playful shoulder punches cannot be innately intimate? Not her

She likes hair ribbons! Based on the show and cute comic strips, when she can, she steals Blossom’s bow to wear it. How damn cute would it be if she just really likes them, but knows it was Blossom’s thing so she just admires them from afar.

Speaking of arbitrary pieces of fabric, she still has her childhood blankie. It’s folded neatly underneath her pillow at all times. She’d be damned if she ever lost it again.

Finally, she’s loyal to the max and doesn’t give up easily, so once she lets you in, you’re in for life.

[emybain]

nodrian headcanons where they get to live slightly normally/where they get to take a little break from reality and just be "normal"

this was super fun to write! im a little bitter that they never got an actual, honest date in the series, so I decided to take that into my own hands. hope you like it:)

CONTAINS SUPERNOVA SPOILERS

    Change is good. Change is good. Change is good.

    Those three words were on a loop in Nova’s head. She stared at herself in the mirror, torn between liking the clothes on her body and wanting nothing more than to rip them off and put on leggings and a sweatshirt. It was nothing fancy, just a pair of acid washed jeans with a plain white t-shirt. She dressed it up a little bit with a necklace Honey had given her years ago and her father’s bracelet. The biggest issue was the bandana in her hair; Ruby had convinced her to buy it a few weeks ago because Nova liked the pattern. It was a simple light blue silky fabric with tiny pink flowers here and there. It was pretty, that was all. But Nova had seen how other girls had started wearing bandanas as hair accessories, and she kind of liked that, so she was now debating whether or not to keep the one she had bought tied in her hair. 

    She was going out on a date with Adrian for the first time since the Supernova and since they decided to break up to give one another time and figure things out. A couple weeks ago, he had  casually mentioned that he was ready whenever she was, but he would wait for her. That had terrified her, honestly, and it wasn’t until a few days ago that she sent him a text telling him that she was ready, too. 

    Her therapist, a nice older lady named Liza, suggested the other day Nova do something to step outside of her comfort zone, like wearing something she normally wouldn’t wear. Change could be a good thing. She didn’t have to step too far out, but maybe baby steps at first. Like instead of wearing leggings, wear a pair of jeans. Or put on a small piece of jewelry. Or wear a color a shade lighter than normal. 

    There was a knock at her apartment door. Nova cursed and looked at herself once more in the mirror. She bit her bottom lip, hoping that maybe that would bring some color back into it. She sprayed herself with perfume and then left her room, grabbing her bag on the way out. 

    Adrian smiled at her when she opened the door, eyes widening as he looked her up and down. A blush crept onto her cheeks.

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

There was a short pause, borderline awkward, before he said, “You look nice,” then held out an arm. “Ready to go? There’s this new restaurant in the historic downtown that I think you’d love.”

    Feeling a rush of boldness, Nova grabbed his hand instead, lacing their fingers together. His smile brightened, and he squeezed her hand. “Ready.” 

__________

    Nova had only been to the old downtown a few times in her life. It used to be pretty rundown and sketchy, but in recent years, there had been a revival in the area. Now there were little coffee shops, antique stores, pubs, boutiques, and more spread out over one main and four side streets. The streets had been redone as well, paved with brick like how they used to be back in the day. The only modes of transportation allowed were by foot or by cheesy horse-drawn carriages. The area was like a little bubble away from the rest of the city. And it was stunning in the evening, as everything was lit up. 

    Dinner had been wonderful. Adrian took her to a burger place designed like an old-timey diner; there was even a jukebox that played music from another era. They had talked and laughed as they always did, as if nothing had really changed. After all, Adrian was still Nova’s best friend, and they had always kind of known that they would get back together one day, so nothing was awkward. The only thing that was different now than it had been in recent months was that Adrian sat beside her in their booth and held her hand, absentmindedly tracing her fingers. He even got bold enough to reach a hand down beneath the table to rest on her knee at one point while they ate. Nova never once protested at his affections. 

    Now they were strolling down the sidewalk, sharing an ice cream in a cup with two spoons. Adrian’s jacket was still resting on her shoulders from when she got cold in the restaurant. 

    “I’ve been talking with the people in weapons,” Nova said, licking her thumb as a little bit of ice cream dribbled down onto it. “They’re really interested in some of my designs, how they’re better for every day crime instead of targeting prodigies-”

    “No Renegade talk,” Adrian said sternly, although there was humor in his eyes. He nudged her lightly. “Remember what we agreed on?” Right. They had agreed to not bring up the Renegades or the Council or the government or anything like that. They would have a normal date as normal teenagers and not as superheroes who were known worldwide. 

    Nova rolled her eyes and pushed him back. “Fine, bossy. What do you want to talk about?”

    Adrian didn’t answer for a minute, although Nova could feel his intense gaze on her. “Your birthday’s coming up, right? May…?”

    “27th.” Nova nodded. “But it’s March, Adrian.”

    “It’s still coming up.” He shook his head with a slight laugh. “Are you going to do anything?”

    She shrugged. “I don’t think so. Maybe go out to eat with the team, or Ruby might force me out of my apartment to do something.” With a tiny glance in his direction, she added, “Maybe have a date with my boyfriend.”

    He stopped in his tracks, and they had to move to the edge of the sidewalk as to not block the pathway. He looked down at her, joy clearly written in his features that he was trying so hard to school. Nova bit her lip to hide her grin, although it wasn’t working too well. 

    “Are you saying you want to be my girlfriend, Nova Artino?” She could’ve sworn he puffed his chest out a bit, maybe even raised his chin a bit higher. 

    “Not anymore.” She snorted and pushed him away. Noticing that their ice cream was gone, she grabbed it out of his hands and threw it out in the trash can beside her. Then, she turned to leave him, jokingly of course. As expected, he pulled her back to him, arms encircling her waist. Her laughter died in her throat, but her smile remained. 

    “Yes,” she answered honestly this time. “Let’s make it official.”

    “Are you ready for that?” The look he gave her was so sweet, so sincere. It only made Nova love him more. “It won’t be easy, at least with the public knowing about us. And I don’t want to rush you if you need more time.”

    Nova shook her head firmly. She had noticed all night the looks people gave her, the confusion and elation and anger from all different kinds of faces at the sight of her with Adrian Everhart. Some probably still thought she hated the Renegades. Some saw hope at an Artino and an Everhart coming together out of love. Some were upset that a former villain should be allowed a chance at redemption and happiness. But she had been given those looks for months whenever she was in public with one of her friends, especially Adrian. She still wasn’t used to it, maybe she never would get used to it, but it had gotten easier. 

    “I want you, Adrian Everhart.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “All of you. And if that includes nosy people,” she shrugged, “then so be it. I won’t love you any differently.”

His hold on her waist tightened. He reached a hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, then let it rest on the back of her neck as he leaned down. Nova met him halfway, heart fluttering when he murmured so softly, just loud enough for her ears alone, “I’m so in love with you, Artino.” 

The kiss was short and sweet, nothing more than a few gentle pecks. It had been a while since they had kissed, and Nova had to restrain herself from jumping in his arms and kissing him like there was no tomorrow. She knew, however, that they couldn’t. For one, they were in public. And two, there was probably a reporter hiding somewhere, camera at the ready. Nova wouldn’t be surprised if she found photos of her date with Adrian the next day, with their kiss blown up for the world to see. 

But she didn’t care. Not in that moment. 

__________

Adrian drove her home. 

They sat in his car for a while, just talking. It was more private here. Nova allowed herself to be a bit more open with him, playing with his fingers as he recounted what Max had done the other day that got him grounded for a week. 

“But my dads can barely keep the grounding serious.” Adrian shook his head in amusement. “Especially Hugh. They seem to ‘forget’ that Max is in trouble when he’s watching TV.”

Nova rolled her eyes. “I’m just glad to hear he’s adjusting okay, and that he’s not always a wise old man. It’s good for him to get in trouble.” 

“I know.” Adrian chuckled. “But that still doesn’t mean I won’t preach the injustice with all the times I was grounded for doing the littlest of things.” 

“You’re not exactly innocent, Mr. Everhart.” Nova narrowed her eyes at him. “You’ve had a few secrets up your sleeve. Literally.” 

She tried to maintain her neutral expression as Adrian shifted his body a bit closer. “Oh, we’re going to play that game, huh?” 

“I’m just saying,” she started, smile creeping onto her lips, but her defense was soon forgotten when he placed a hand on her cheek. Instinctively, she leaned into his touch. “But none of that matters anymore, right? No more secrets.”

Adrian’s lips quirked up. Her eyes were immediately drawn to them. “No more secrets,” he repeated softly. Leaning forward, he placed a kiss on her cheek. “Skies, I’ve missed you, Nova.” He pulled back a bit to face her. “I know we agreed that breaking up was for the best, and being just friends while figuring this shit out helped a ton, but I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t also agonizing to not be able to be with you in that way.”

Nova rested her forehead on his, feeling her neck heat up. “I missed you, too,” she murmured. “But now we have mostly everything figured out.” She paused. “I meant it when I said earlier that I’m ready.”

He kissed her, slow yet not long enough. “You’re so beautiful, Nova.”

Nova beamed against his lips and kissed him back, a bit harder than before. He responded with enthusiasm; the hand on her cheek pulled off her bandana and reached back to dig into her hair. She melted under his touch, becoming completely putty in his arms. It was hard to keep her composure. After all, it had been months since she had been this intimate with someone, as Adrian was her last. 

His lips wandered down to her throat, leaving her trembling. When he was sly enough to gently pull her skin in between his teeth, Nova couldn’t hold back the moan that escaped her mouth. As her hand trailed up his back underneath his shirt, she had a brief thought to invite him in to watch a movie or something. It wasn’t too terribly late, and they still had a lot of catching up to do. But then she felt his fingers graze her hip and rest just underneath her bra as he rose back up to kiss her deeply, and suddenly she wanted nothing more than to be lost in Adrian Everhart. 

However, they were in his car outside her apartment complex. His windows didn’t exactly grant them privacy. Really, it wasn’t the most romantic setting for their activity. 

Sighing against him, she broke the kiss. His eyes blinked open in surprise, chest rising and falling as heavily as hers. He frowned at her.

Before he could start asking questions, Nova brought a hand to push his glasses up. Her fingers may or may not have accidentally brushed his lips when her hand fell to his cheek. She tried to catch her breath even as she spoke.  “How about we go inside where it’s more...appropriate? Watch a movie, maybe?” 

Adrian glanced at their surroundings and nodded. They shared a sheepish smile, then headed inside. 

They weren’t an hour into the movie before they passed out on the couch cuddling, nothing but a tangled mess of blankets and limbs.

[dcbicki]

Mike, El, and the importance of intimacy and space

I know a lot of people aren’t happy with how Mike/Eleven was handled this season and so I’m here to spill some tea and offer some help. It wasn’t out-of-character, and it wasn’t bad writing. You’ve just gotta look below surface level and stop thinking everything is black and white because, spoiler alert, the Duffer Brothers aren't hacks. Here’s how Mileven’s relationship matured and got healthier in the third season, and why you should stop thinking it’s the end of the world:

First off, I saw it coming, and I’m glad my prediction was correct. It stung less, and I’m happy with that ending. I knew there would be a greater reason for Hopper to force space between them other than him just being in protective!Dad mode. They needed to learn how to be together while also maintaining a healthy distance.

I think if you’re unsatisfied with how they ended season three, or you feel cheated, or you’re depressed, it’s probably because you -- and I mean this in the nicest way possible, I really do -- missed the point completely.

In the first season, they get torn apart from one another after, like, seven days of knowing each other, but they don’t know how to handle separation because they’re twelve years old and they’re basically just strangers with deep infatuation... In the second season, El spies on him because she misses him, but, more importantly, she misses how he made her feel: accepted and at home, and Mike is unable to move on and so he doesn’t mourn her death because something deep within him is telling him not to (*cough* soulmate energy *cough). But then they’re reunited, and ever since then, Mike’s priority is keeping El safe. (This is why I have a problem with Max’s attitude towards El’s powers but that’s for another post).

In the third season, it’s established straight away that they’re pretty... erm, close, and apparently, they’ve been like that for six months (so ever since the Snowball, I guess). It’s understandable that Hopper wants to create some distance between them, and as the viewer, you’ve kinda got to side with him because these are teenagers, and they’re clearly maturing. That’s easy to see. But you’ve got to understand why they need time apart -- not Hopper’s reasons, but the writers’ motivations. Yes, it’s because they’re going to be “torn apart” from each other again.

If you spend every waking hour of every day with somebody, eventually you become co-dependent and you'll be unable to form other relationships. This isn’t Hopper’s objective, really. He just wants to keep El (and Mike) safe, and young. His plan isn’t to break them up but to make sure they learn the importance of space -- personal space! He needs her indoors for the time being, and so El makes up for this by inviting her boyfriend over every damn day to listen to cheesy music and makeout. And they are too close when the season starts. The writers use Hop to create physical space between them, and Max’s (questionable) friendship and advice to create psychological distance. But eventually, their feelings win out. And you know what else gets a win because of this? Their relationship. It becomes healthier, and they learn how to be together while also being apart, which is something they hadn’t had to face before. It’s the bittersweet halfway point between the first and second season finales.

If Hopper tells us that they’re too close, then we believe it. But the problem with seeing things through his -- and Max’s -- eyes is that the level of intimacy they’ve reached is actually a lot deeper than just kissing and hiding in her bedroom, and Mike “having her all to himself”. It’s played for comedic relief, and you’re led to believe they’re just being gross teenagers because that’s literally how the season starts. But if you fall for this, that means the writers did their job right, and you’ve fallen right into their trap.

Mike and El’s relationship isn’t “normal”, and so both Max and Lucas’ advice falls on deaf ears in the end. (What works for one couple isn’t going to work for the other when one half of the latter has superpowers.) Eventually, they just end up back together, but not in the same way they were before. It’s a lot less visibly shallow now. And it’s entirely intentional because the intimacy post-breakup is a lot more important than that in the first episode -- this is what we should be focusing on, and this is what’s going to enable them to be in a healthy relationship from here on out.

Mike is the only one (yeah, I said it!) that gives a shit about El’s actual well-being until she nearly gets her leg ripped off. Everyone else just seems all too eager to let El do her thing, and save the day as usual. Mike is the only one who respected Hopper’s instructions to keep her in the cabin until she’s allowed outside -- because, oh yeah, it’s not been a year! and Dustin’s house doesn’t count! and she does have a curfew so there are definite rules set in place that Max just totally disobeys! Mike is the only one who actually moves to defend her when she’s being, you know, strangled to death. Mike is her first protector, whether you like it or not, whether you want to admit it or not. He has been since the first season since he took her in and kept her safe.

El has, and people always ignore this, a serious hero complex. But it’s because she’s had to be the hero for everyone, and save the day, and so she doesn’t know when they stop. I’m all for giving her agency, and it’s great that she discovered herself this season, but we’ve gotta stop pretending she knows her limits. She doesn’t. Mike does, and Hopper does, and she has to be told to stop because otherwise, everyone else is just going to wait for her to pass out and then come up with a solution. She can’t be the constant savior; and Mike knew this but no one was listening.

Mike, while the de-facto leader of his group, also fulfills typical love interest tropes, but he’s special in that he’s a fourteen-year-old boy dating the teenaged hero. People are going to misinterpret his actions, including the other characters. He’s not controlling. He’s just rightfully concerned about things nobody else seems to be worried about. And eventually, El seems to just accept this: that Mike is her North Star.

This is where we get into intimacy. Ironically, everyone focuses on the kissing when it comes to these two but that’s really not the most important aspect of their relationship: it’s touch. The progression of touch between them is everything if you track it back to their first episode. Over time, El has gone from refusing the touch of his hand on her forearm to full-on collapsing into him. They quite literally fold into each other now, into a mess of hair and limbs and hands, and I’m not even entirely sure it’s intentional. Millie and Finn play it with such ease that I’m honestly kind of surprised two teenagers have such good chemistry that I just buy the progression. They don’t have to sell it. They don’t have to try. They give the most important part of Mike and El’s relationship away freely without words. It’s seamless.

Mike is her North Star: her constant, the first person she’s reached for since she allowed herself to, was given the choice. And the good thing about that? The North Star is always there, no matter how far away you move or where you go. You’ll always find it again. Even if they’re apart now, they’ll find their way back to one another because they know how: not through entering the void if she could, not by calling out into the nether because he’s losing hope, but because they’ve discovered how to love each other without it becoming all-consuming. They breached a level of intimacy that didn't involve hormones or sex as one might have expected; pent-up emotions were first expressed through intimate touch, and this, in turn, allowed them to reach a natural turning point in their relationship: in love, with boundaries set and feelings laid out. In fact, it was actually kind of normal of them. Strange, I know...

(PS: Also, they totes love each other. You’re welcome.)

[bunjywunjy]

LIFE IN THE FAST LANE

in the market for some weird animal facts? well, I’m happy to oblige. you look like a discerning customer with a real need for speed, so allow me to introduce you to one of Nature’s finest sports models! they’re lean, they’re mean, and they can go 0-60 in 3 seconds flat! and boy, that engine really purrs.

put the pedal to the metal, because it’s-

CHEETAH! he can really move! CHEETAH! with anxious attitude! CHEETAH! HE’S THE FASTEST THING ALIIIIIIIIVE

Cheetahs are large spotty cats built along the same lines as a Greyhound. (the dog, not the bus.) they’re found throughout sub-Saharan Africa and some parts of Asia, where they sprint around like maniacs and pose for tourists to their heart’s content. at least 75% of every Cheetah is limbs by volume, and they sport a pair of iconic black tear track markings that would make Gerard Way jealous.

you’ve probably seen them before on junk food packaging in your local grocery store, but their real claim to fame is that they’re the fastest land animal on the entire planet. vroom vroom!

the whole Dangerously Cheesy thing is just a side job. 

there’s a surprising amount of really dang fast animals on this planet, (most are mammals, but none of then are hedgehogs.) but the Cheetah has them all beat for sheer ground speed alone. other animals can run further or for longer, but none can match the Cheetah’s absolutely insane landspeed record of 61 to 70 miles per hour. (ish.)

that’s an absolutely absurd amount of speed for something that has paws instead of wheels or wings. in fact, that’s even faster than some creatures who DO have wings! (those creatures probably feel pretty bad right now, and they should.) to give some perspective: if you’re a Cheetah, it’s straight-up fucking illegal to sprint in almost all of Illinois. (good luck arresting a Cheetah though, they’re bitey!)

you have the right to OW you have the right to remain silent OW STOP BITING ME

while it’s a known fact that Cheetahs are THE fastest mammal currently in existence on our beautiful planet, exactly how fast they are is a subject of some debate and also some academic hair-pulling. (there’s a surprising amount of hair-pulling in academia, both figurative and literal.) this is because it’s actually pretty difficult to a) motivate any animal to sprint at full speed for your own personal amusement, and b) calculate exactly how fast said animal is moving once you’ve motivated it into sprint mode.

methods for clocking the speed of a sprinting Cheetah have included solutions as fancy-schmancy sciencetech as radio-tracking GPS collars, radar guns, and carefully measured artificial courses, and also solutions as straight-up mad max bullshit as driving next to the sprinting Cheetah in a rusted-out truck and just having an intern watch the speedometer, or dragging bait behind a speeding car and having a different intern watch the speedometer. these methods give some very different results, as you might imagine.

there’s a surprising amount of straight-up mad max bullshit in science, because fancy-schmany sciencetech can only get you so far.

Cheetahs can only sustain this absolutely insane burst of speed for about thirty seconds, but that’s more than long enough for their purposes. Cheetahs mostly hunt antelope, who are slower but definitely no slackers in the speed department themselves. this often leads to suspenseful high-speed chases all over the dang place like an episode of Serengeti: Cheetah Vice Squad.

once a Cheetah has located its intended victim, it uses its incredible speed to turbo boost close enough to Blue Shell the hapless antelope’s legs right out from under it, sending it tumbling and causing a tragic antelope-pileup on the Serengeti and probably ending up on the antelope evening news. and then just to add insult to injury, the Cheetah bites its neck open and eats it.

I’ve said it before, but nature is so mean. SO MEAN.

Cheetahs are the only big cat to have this particular hunting style, and it’s because there’s no other cats quite like them. they’re not even technically “big cats”, but something so weird that they have an entire genus, Acinonyx, completely to themselves. and they’re so weird because mother nature minimaxed them for Speed and dumped every other stat to do it.

Cheetahs are long, lanky, flexible, and very lightly built. this gives them the power to accelerate like a Ferrari on bath salts, but it also makes them really bad at basically anything else large cats are usually known for. Cheetahs also can’t roar, and instead they make noises usually associated with your garden-variety tabby cat. they chirp, meow, hiss, mew, and even purr! (I don’t know about you, but I’ll take a purr over a roar any day.)

literally everything about this cat is intended to fling it forward at the highest rate of giddyup possible, and I can respect that.

but this hyperspecialized body plan comes with a price: Cheetahs are relatively weak and incredibly fragile. in fact, they’re completely outmatched by just about every other predator in Africa! they get bullied, bodied, and have their kills stolen and cubs infanticided on a pretty regular basis. this is very sad and awful, and it’s why every Cheetah in existence is an anxious mess.

no seriously, Cheetahs are notoriously anxious animals, even in captivity! this is rough for the Cheetah and can be a huge problem for animals in zoos and breeding programs. but luckily there’s a solution to soothe these unlucky anxious kitties- support dogs!

enough talk about infanticide, time for PUPPIES!

some zoos have begun raising puppies and Cheetah kittens together, giving the Cheetahs a sibling with a more laissez faire outlook on life to look up to. and the weirdest part is- it’s working! Cheetahs in breeding programs that are given dog siblings are even beginning to have the cubs they were too nervous to have before, and it’s all thanks to the positive life outlook of man’s best friend!

and that’s important, because Cheetahs are currently listed as Vulnerable. their population and range is shrinking, and these captive breeding programs are vital to keeping their numbers healthy. international efforts are underway to protect the Cheetahs and their habitat, and there’s hope that these fragile nervous speedsters will continue to blitz their way into the future.

with dog, all things are possible.

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thanks for reading! you can find the rest of the Weird Biology series on my tumblr here, or check out the official archive at weirdbiology.com!

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IMAGE SOURCES

img1- Parade img2- Ranger Rick img3- The Daily Mail/Caters News Agency img4- Sciencing img5- National Geographic img6- National Zoo img7- BoredPanda img8- Attractions Magazine

[sugar-petals]

Sub!Namjoon A-Z 

note: posts for other members linked in m.list!

⚠️ warnings: dom/sub dynamics, smut, bdsm

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

In the mood to talk a lot. Might appreciate a high five. I’m not even kidding.

b = body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Confident about his legs. Always uses a metric ton of lotion to make them extra soft for you to fondle. Might go through a few bottles a month because wow, his legs have a lot of well um leggy leg to be slathered. For you... similar area, he likes your feet to worship. 

c = cum (anything to do with cum basically… i’m a disgusting person)

How much more playful can he get. At your command, he’ll lick it off your butt. Sex with Namjoon is always super creamy-sloppy-sweaty anyways, he has a lot to gobble up.

d = dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Most of the other members have as many secrets as they have fingers, Namjoon, however, will exceed that by far. He wants to try shibari, sounding, pet play, flogging, collaring, and basically everything that comes with spreader bars and gimps. Clearly spends too much time on the internet because holy cow, that’s ambitious. But you can take it as a compliment to your skill, or rather, Namjoon’s conviction that you master a lot of kinks.

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

In his mind, and in general terms of knowledge, very much so. He’s not just well-versed with humanitarian thought, kink is not safe from his curiosity. Practically, less so, but he learns fast with your lead.

f = favourite position (this goes without saying.)

Up against a wall. He is not above begging for you to pin him to one everywhere. Also his favorite mode of making out, by the way.

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Oops! By accident. Like when removing pants, trying to at least, because his boner often gets stuck, or stumbling across the room entangled with you, trying to head towards the bed.

h = hair (how well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Will definitely experiment with razors a lot. Because let’s face it, Namjoon is like straight out of a shaving commercial. Imagine him in those scenarios where the guy is all sensual under the shower with cream dripping everywhere, or leaning against the mirror wall. It’s totally worth filming.

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

You probably have to prevent him from getting super cheesy... or allow it because oh my, he becomes even more hopelessly subby from that.

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Edging, edging, edging. Him masturbating gets him into all sorts of trouble and everyone in BTS has at least one Kim ‘Fap Monster’ Namjoon story they can drunkenly tell at a party to embarrass him for eternity. He’s most infamous for moaning far too loud during climax and even talking to himself, or accidentally streaming his session into the group chat. The first sex-related thing that you’ll ever do is establish a couple rules for Fap Monster to follow, and generally engage in more guided masturbation than having him do it alone.

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

The question remains, what kink doesn’t he have! But I get it, something specific, let’s see. That would be breast sucking. And not just on you, we all know the perks of Namjoon’s chest.

l = location (favourite places to do the do)

Now hear me out. It’s not the library, but something even more... out of the ordinary. Namjoon would totally be ready to have sex in abandoned places of some sort given that there’s not a spider every corner and unsafe debris. Maybe for nostalgic value, or the sheer thrill. You’ll have to talk about it.

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Different every week. He will gladly explain that to you in his 2 AM texts that read like a Kant chapter each. 

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Now we had that, it’s more difficult to pinpoint that one. Nams would probably mention something that doesn’t go in accordance with his moral values and is general common sense either way, like some kind of creepy race/non-con play or certain forms of edge play torture that take hygiene concerns to a new level and would shred anyone without 10 years of experience. Besides exchanging thoughts with you, he’ll get busy in some BDSM forums online and inform himself on how the consensus is. Namjoon is definitely the type to know about what is controversial and being careful with that. He is kinky, but role model kinky. 

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Oh man. What can’t he do with his tongue. And those lips... fit perfectly on your labia. Surely equal amounts giving and receiving, 69 ahoy.

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Sex with Namjoon is so dynamic, speed hardly stays the same over the course of a few minutes. Ever heard his tracks? You can assess how a rapper fucks by his mixtape alone. He switches flow every ten bars. That’s how Namjoon is in bed. 

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

You can jump on his dick as often as you please, problem is that Namjoon’s masturbation troubles transfer to your quickies as well. I think there’s a reason why abandoned places are perfect because otherwise, the whole world will know.

r = risk (are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

90% risk, 10% contemplation. That might seem unusual for him, but in your presence, Namjoon quickly becomes a bit of a carefree guy. Hormones are one hell of a drug. But! It’s good to see him leave his mind palace.

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

To be fair: He tries and tries and tries. All that edging does give him a few bonus minutes of endurance, but 15 minutes is the limit. Two rounds max. 

t = toy (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

One of the few members who isn’t caught up in the toy mania. Seriously, can you imagine Joon operating something like a Sybian? It’s not him. Instead, he prefers you to bring your own collection along, who said Kim Namjoon doesn’t like some anal beads to stretch him out.

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

His teasing is so subtle, it’s a test for your intelligence. If you don’t get it, he can still do one of his infamous simple, but effective winks to get your attention. The guy has several methods up his sleeve and thinks you’re cool anyways. Namjoon is a pretty sophisticated flirt, you’ll love that.

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make)

Boy, what a confusion is that going to be for the neighbors. “Is Y/N watching Jurassic World again?” Nope, it’s your man making some weird inhuman noises and he’s proud of them. 

w = wild card (get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

You can definitely take him hiking and have a lot of fun in the mountains, you know. Again, that saves civilization from Namjoon’s lack of vocal control and you have free reins to really make him choke and moan in the meadows.

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Doctors hate him! How did Kim Namjoon grow such an impressive 8th member of BTS reaching from Ilsan to Seoul? Citizens use it as a bridge! Buy his secrets for just 70.99$! Now I’m joking, Namjoon dabbles around upper average independently of his body height, and you can be glad because if that was in true proportion your gynecologist would be the one hating him and that third leg. He’s definitely material for cock and ball torture, lots of areas to work with. Add the ass he’s been growing to spank. I swear the guy’s a sex symbol.  

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

How to describe it. Namjoon has a lot of pizzazz. It magically goes to sleep in the presence of books though.

z = zzz (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Click! Lights off. It happens pretty fast so you have to wrap it up quickly and kiss your koala goodnight.