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umadosedepascal · 9 months

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O U C H | Pedro Pascal x f!reader | PART VII

Written by Santa Trindade

Banner by @missyorkswhore

Made in Brazil

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x f!reader

Summary: You are at the Golden Globes and meet Pedro over there, he didn’t win unfortunately but still, he is a winner in bed.

wc: 4.1k

rating/warnings: [Smut][Semi public sex] [unprotected PIV][oral sex m/f][Pedro injured] [sex on bathtub] [elevator][Pedro a little dom] [spanking ass] [Hold neck] [Curse words ][nipple play] [making out inside the car][Pedro speaks spanish]

a/n: My fellow followers, we are fast. I know. Pedro does help us imagine these kind of situation EASILY! just because he is HOT, even wearing an arm sling (poor baby). And yes, he is our slut winner always! More to come for the Emmys! 😘 please consider reposting, let’s spread it fucking hard! 🤘🏻

This Sunday was certainly one of the busiest since the year began, you arrived early at the salon to do hair, makeup and nails, it took you a long time to choose the best dress and perfect shoes for the Golden Globes.

Despite being a little cold in Los Angeles, you got a long dress with a naked back and slit in your left leg, perfect shoes, jewelry and hair, you were finally ready for the event.

The traffic of Los Angeles is always chaotic and today it would be no different, otherwise it is worse, there are so many cars, photographers and people. The driver goes near the entrance of the Bervely Hilton hotel, and as soon as you enter you already meet some friends and acquaintances. Your assistant is always pulling you, saying that you have little time as you walked towards the red carpet.

You give some interviews and as soon as you finish your interview with Vanity Fair, you turn around and see Pedro telling a reporter that he is injured because he fell, he hasn't seen you yet.

Pedro goes out in line for the red carpet photos, You are six people behind him, but even from afar you can see how beautiful he looks, black shirt with white details, black pants and equally black boots, you give a giggle when you see that he matched the arm sling with the clothes.

It's your turn to pose for the paparazzi, you position yourself behind the wall, look to your left and see that he is still taking pictures, talking, and even about the countless flashes, you feel his gaze on you.

You smile at the photographers and get close to Pedro, he opens a smile when he sees you, saying your name and extending his hand, pulling you close to him. He immediately puts his hand on your back, feeling your naked skin, his index finger makes small circles on your back while he talks to the man in front of you, you can barely understand what they talk about, it's so much noise and your mind focused only on the feeling of his finger playing with your skin.

Pedro's conversation ends, he pulls you by giving you a kiss on the cheek quickly while saying "See you later" giving a wink, he goes inside with his agent.

Your table is opposite to Pedro's, but you can still see him from where you are. During the awards your eyes meet each other, even from a distance.

He always smiling despite being hurt, he talks excitedly to everyone, with each winner who passes he gets up and greets.

You are so anxious to see him take the stage and receive the prize he deserves.

You already in your third Moet glass, and they finally announce the nominees for best drama actor, when they announce Pedro's name, you can't contain yourself, you get up and cheer for him, as if you were alone in your room in front of him, pleasuring him in the best way, whether about acting or how he fucks you until he leaves you breathless.

Unfortunately he does not win the category, so an idea comes to your mind, you are convinced that you will give him the best night ever.

Even after the defeat, Pedro doesn't stop smiling, you take your phone and send him a message "You are much bigger than any prize dear, let me show you that later?"

It takes a few minutes for him to see message, you look towards his table and giggle when you see him getting in the way holding his phone with only one hand, he puts the phone on his lap and types, a few seconds later his answer arrives, you feel your hands sweaty, a twink in your stomach when reading "I confess that I'm not happy about it, but now I'm very curious about how you will convince me that I'm worthy for you"

You bite your lip as you read and look at him, even a few meters away, you feel that brown sea on his eyes burning you, you just blink and raise your glass in a silent toast.

A few more awards are delivered, speeches are made, and you almost feel bad for not paying so much attention, almost. Your thoughts are in Pedro, hoping that everything ends soon for you to leave, and from what you look towards him, Pedro is not very different from you, his fingers hitting the table, playing with the glass between his fingers.

Finally the last prize is announced and delivered, everyone gets up, celebrating, lamenting. You dodge the invitations to the after party, claiming to have to wake up early for work, you go towards Pedro's table, he is taking some pictures with other people, you stand still finishing your last glass of champagne waiting anxiously to get his attention.

As soon as the last photo is taken, Pedro turns to you, that smile that only he has, stretching out his hand he says excitedly "Shall we go to the after party?" Your smile weakens at the time, you feel a twinge of disappointment, but you try miserably to disguise it, agreeing with your head, he laughs loudly and says "I got you! Come on, let's go to the car, I told you we're leaving" Pedro holds your hand and goes towards the exit, we stop a few times to greet some acquaintances, but Pedro always uses the same excuse -my arm is killing me, I forgot my medicine at home, sorry, next time I will-

Pulling you by the free hand, he always looks at me in the corner, bites his lip trying to hold a smile.

Pedro opens the car door to me and says softly with a shy smile "Can we go to your house tonight?".

You open your eyes and try to remember if everything is tidy and clean at your apartment, after all you remember isn’t that bad. "You got it! I have frozen pizza and beers" he laughs waving his head and raises his eyebrow, you get in the car and Pedro sits next to you, he puts his hand on your thigh and gently smoothes up and down, You look at his face and see him staring at you, eyes so expressive. His hand goes up until he finds the lace of your panties, he releases a cough while looking at the driver who is focused on traffic. You open your legs a little giving him more access to your pussy, you feel his middle finger go up and down pressing your clit, you look at him scared and say softly while you pretend to fix your earring "Are you crazy? El conductor lo verá"

He laughs and points with his head to the button next to you near the window "Press" he says, I press and then a black glass part rises between us and the driver.

Pedro raises his hand to your face, pulling you for a kiss, his lips taste like some strong drink, he sucks your tongue, bites your lower lip and whispers in your ear

"You can't even imagine how much I was waiting to put my hand under this dress." You open your legs, putting one on top of his, giving yourself to whatever he wants.

Pedro plays with the fabric of the dress, until you feel his fingers rub your clit over your panties. You close your eyes feeling him press his finger while his mouth says dirty things in your ear, you let out an involuntary moan, Pedro looks at you and tells you to be quiet, you smile and disguise.

You notice something in his hand that is bandaged, you bend to see and his nails have some kind of sticker, he laughs as you stretch his fingers and read _OUCH_

“What is this Pedro?!” You ask laughing, he answers between laughs "did you like it?"

We both laughed, you say yes, that you loved it, you take your hand out of his and slide on his head, your fingers wrapping in his curls, doing a massage, Pedro moans softly enjoying the massage. You watch his face, eyes closed, mouth slightly open while delighting in the massage, until you stop the movements opens his eyes staring at me. He is no longer smiling, neither you are, the atmosphere has changed, the car seems to heat up, you bring your lips closer to theirs while your other hand squeezes his thigh, going up to his groin, the tip of your nail circling the bulge that begins to harden. Pedro doesn't move, he just accepts your touches, you raise your hand until you find his belt, you open it and pull the zipper down, the only movement he makes with his body and raise his hips to give you access. You slide your hand in and feel his hot cock, you squeeze it and he moans throwing his head back. You raise your hand to the waistband of his boxers and run your index finger through the wet head with pre cum, he lets out a low swear word, when he sees you take his finger on your lips and suck it.

The car stop and you see that you are in front of your place.

Pedro stretches his hand over his thigh, adjusting the pants that shows his cock completely hard, you help him fix his belt and he gets out of the car. He extend his hand to you, you hold it firmly and leave, you take the keychain inside your bag, but it is so difficult to find the right one, because your brain freezes when you feel Pedro so close to your back, his hand playing with your hair, his fingers going up your back to the shoulders where he gently slide his nails, you hum

"This way we won't even get past the elevator Jose" he lets out a low giggle whispering a sorry.

As soon as you enter the hall, you press the elevator button and you feel that it is the twelve longest seconds of your life, the two of you looking closely at the elevator display, the tension is palpable, you look without blinking at the decreasing numbers _19, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14, 13, 12, 11, 10_ you count down mentally and when the ten arrives, you feel Pedro hold your nape tightly, pulling you until you back hits his chest, he runs his nose through your shoulder until he reaches your jaw, where he licks and bites gently

"If that fucking elevator takes five more seconds to open, I swear to God I'll fuck you on that table over there, after all I haven't won my trophy yet" he says that and turns your neck to the side, making you see the little table where the flowers in the hall are.

The elevator warns you that it is on the ground floor scares you, your heart accelerates, you look at Pedro who is still so close to your face and just nod your head towards the elevator door.

As soon as you enter, you press number 24, when the doors close, you ask Pedro to hold your bag, he holds and stares at you, you lean your back against the elevator wall and squat a little and putting your hand under your dress - thank God the side slit helped me - you take off your panties and when tou get up you find his eyes looking at you and looking for cameras in the elevator, you giggle and approach to get your bag while knead your panties in your hand and put them in his front pocket.

Pedro doesn't say anything, the growl that comes out of his throat speaks more than a thousand words.

The elevator warns tou that you are on the right floor, but you still need to look for the key inside the bag.

“Key, right?” He says while you search my bag

_God, I had them in my hand a few minutes ago_

Pedro pushes you against the wall, at the same time he slides his fingers on your lips making you open them, he puts two fingers in your mouth and makes you suck it, he takes out his fingers and holds your chin, making you raise your face more towards him, giving you a quick kiss, he slides his fingers wet with your saliva inside the slit of your dress, his fingers rubbing your clit, sticking two fingers in your pussy.

You let out a low moan and then kiss, your left hand on his chin smoothing his beard while the other still looks for a key inside the bag.

His fingers in and out of you, you suck his lip and move away, interrupting the kiss you raise my hand, shaking the key between your fingers

“Found it!”

He laughs and takes his fingers out of you, and takes it to his lips, sucking. You open the door, Pedro pulls you towards your room, which he is already familiar with, he sits on your bed, takes your panties out of his pocket and extends it to his side and says:

“You did this, can you take off my clothes as well?”

Without thinking, you approach him, you knee down and start with the boots and socks, never breaking eye contact.

You are between his legs and drag your hands until you find his belt, unbuckle and slowly open a button, stop and look at him, as if asking for permission

"Yeah babe, like this" he says with a smile on his face, you open the other button and open the zipper. You hook your fingers into the waistband of his pants and pull his pants so slowly that you can feel the anxiety in the air.

You throw his pants to the side and see how hard he is, you slide your hands over his underwear, his cock is pulsating and hot, kneeling in front of him, you bring your face closer to his cock and run your tongue over his underwear following the entire length, feeling the moisture in the fabric.

Pedro sighs and looks up, murmuring something you don't even understand, you just feel his left hand grabbing your hair, letting out a growl he tells you to get up and sit on his lap. You get up and when you put your hand on the zipper of the dress to take it off, Pedro interrupts me

"Deja el vestido puesto!"

You put one leg on each side of his hip, Pedro moans low when he feels your wet pussy in contact with his thigh, you feel his hand squeezing your nape again, you smile at him while your hands play with the details of the shirt he wears.

"You are so wet babe" without answering you just kiss, your lips touch each other first softly, you feel tickled when the mustache he rubs against your skin, his hand loosens the grip on your hair and slowly goes down your back, the kiss goes wide, you bite his lower lip, pulling between his teeth and licking when releasing,

Pedro never moves his hand away from your body, you feel his thigh press your pussy, you rub yourself feeling the few hairs on his leg in contact with your swollen clit and in need of touch, Pedro lowers his hand to your hip, pulling you down while raising his thigh, you release a moan in his mouth, so what he says is enough for your body to know that he is in complete abstinence "Ride on my thigh... enjoy rubbing against me" Pedro lies on the bed, wearing only his shirt and underwear, you put your hands on his chest and you start rubbing slowly. Pedro doesn't take his eyes off yours, his hand is still on your hip encouraging me to speed up the movements, leading me.

You throw your head back, feeling a heat take over your body, you feel the orgasm rise in your stomach, your clit pulsating, feeling his thigh slide easily in your excitement.

"Come on babe give me, I want to feel you" Pedro begs and squeezes your breast over the dress, you rub harder feeling your orgasm wet his whole thigh "Oh my god Pedro please"

"Yeah babe like that ride me like that" you moan his name, you murmur things that you don't even know what they mean, as soon as you feel your body calm down you open your eyes and there they are, those brown eyes burning me, eqting you alive. You get out of his thigh, dragging you down until you get on your knees on the floor, Pedro runs two fingers on his wet thigh and moans while licking his fingers, as if you were his favorite dessert.

He leans on his left elbow and stares at you you run your nails through his legs, reaching the waistband of his boxers, and before pulling you look him in the eyes and say softly

"Let me demonstrate how important you are my dear"

You slowly pull his undies, his cock jumps hitting his tummy, drops of pre cum flooding his cock head.

You hold his cock by the base and make slow movements from the bottom up, watching the fat drops of pre cum accumulate, wetting your fingers. Without taking your eyes off his eyes you put his cock in your mouth and make circles with the tip of your tongue, cleaning his excitement, you put it in your mouth until you feel the tip of his cock hit your throat, extending your hands and stroke his tummy inside his fancy shirt.

"Help me get this out" you let go of his cock and get up, carefully opening the velcro of his arm sling, you help him take off his shirt throwing it to the side where his clothes turn to a pile. Pedro pulls you making you ride on his lap, you feel his cock hit against your clit, you put your hand between your bodies and holding his cock by the base you fit into your pussy and sit, feeling every inch of it inside you.you both moan loudly, you stand still and help put the arm sling again

"I want you to be safe babe" he laughs and squeezes your ass and moves his hips up entering deeper into you, you push him to lie down and lean over him, gluing your lips to his you bounce on his cock for a while.

"Take off that dress" he says. You get up and pull the side zipper of your dress, Pedro calls you with his fingers and asks you to lie on the bed, he kneels between your legs and stroke your thighs, your belly, circling your nipples.

"I won tonite anyways" he says as he holds his cock by the base and rubs it against your clit.

Pedro slides his cock inside you slowly, taking advantage of every inch, while smoothing the side of your thigh threatening to snap you stretch your hands and scratch his thick thighs.

You feel his nails scratch your thigh and soon the burning of the slap "Come on babe take me all" you push your hips against his, the only sound in the room is your breaths with low moans.

Pedro slides his hand down your neck, squeezing and down until he finds your nipples, he squeezes and rotates between his fingers, making you squeeze his cock with your pussy "fuck Pedro, please I need more" he stop moving, he just keeps looking at me raising an eyebrow while squeezing your nipple between his fingers

"Do you need more? "And giggles

You slide your foot on his tummy pushing him away, you kneel on the bed getting face to face with him, you lick and bite every piece of skin you find, you jerking him off, feeling your fingers get wet with pre cum and your excitement

"On all fours my little bitch" he orders with a slap on your ass, you turn around getting your face pressed against the mattress, you feel Pedro's hand stroke your ass, and then the sound of a slap echoes through the room next to your moan, another slap and you hear him squat, then his lips are in your pussy, his tongue entering you like a cock, he moans against your pussy, making you feel the vibrations of his hoarse voice.

Before getting up you feel his saliva dripping through your pussy, another slap on your ass and you feel his cock hitting your clitoris, rubbing you hard, he moans and curses not being able to have both hands free, Pedro sticks his whole cock into your pussy, taking a loud moan from both of you.

"Fuck Pedro don't fucking stop please" he trust hard, you feel another orgasm forming, his skin hitting against you, his hand passing through your back, scratching your skin.

"Touch your clit, give me one more babe one fucking more" you put your hand in the middle of your legs and it doesn't take many movements to cum on his cock, you feel yourself explode, making you scream the name of Pedro.

"Fuck babe I'm going to fill your pussy" Pedro speed up the movements, his left hand squeezing your hip hard, you feel hot jets of cum flooding your pussy, Pedro moaning your name while slapping your ass a few more times

"Your pussy is milking me you fucking bitch" Pedro throws himself next to you on the bed, breathing with difficulty, he looks at you and laughs and now you realize that he didn't even take off his glasses, the disheveled hair gives an extremely unique look. Him.

"Fuck the awards" he says laughing, panting, you kiss him and say softly

"More awards to come Pedrito, relax" he smiles stretching his hand and slapping you in the ass

"I will win them all! Let's go to the shower"

Pedro stares at you as you undo the velcro of his arm sling “What?" He just smiles saying that out of nowhere, the bathtub is almost full, you enter and feel your feet thank the hot water, you sit down and call him, he approaches and sits behind you, pulling you to have your back glued to his chest, you put your head between his neck and shoulder, stretching your right hand while you play with his hair.

You feel his left hand playing with your nipples, slowly going down yourbelly until you find my clit.

"Hmmm I'm still not happy I need more awards" he says this and puts his leg under yours, making it almost impossible for you to close your legs, the middle and index finger draw circles through your clit, in and out his finger inside you. You tilt your head more looking for his lips, kissing him while you release moans every time you feel him put two fingers inside your pussy.

"I want you to hold my cock with that beautiful hand and put it in that tight little pussy and ride me "

Every word he said was a thrust of his fingers inside you, you turn around and sit on his lap, holding his cock with your right hand, Pedro doesn't wait a second and is already pushing myou down to bury himself inside you. Pedro sucks and bites your nipples, climbs his tongue until he finds your lips, his hand holding your ass tigh, guiding how he wants me to roll.

"Fuck, you're so hot, that pussy squeezes me so hard"

Your moan is loud, your nails scratch his shoulders, your lips meet the skin of his neck where you slide your tongue whispering in his ear how you love to feel his cock all inside you.

Pedro holds the back of your neck making you look into his eyes "Cum on my cock, squeeze me" you grind more feeling your clit rubbing on his lower belly, the orgasm growing inside you, your hands hold his shoulders tightly

"Fuck I'm going to cum"

His hand grabs my neck, squeezing hard as he orders "Now" your moans are weak due to the force he holds your neck, you feel your body tremble

"I'm going to fill your fucking pussy with cum, kiss me please" your kiss is desperate, your moans are loud, Pedro’s hand runs through your body desperate to touch every inch of your skin.

"Fuck, that was much better than any award" he speaks in the midst of laughter you kiss his shoulder and bury your face on his neck

"Always so good... Hmmm pizza and beers?" He laughs loudly and gives you a slow kiss.

"Fuck yeah pizza and beers!"

———————————

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taliasburns · 5 years

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POSIE / HIZZIE HIGHSCHOOL AU (NO POWERS)

i promised this like ages ago so pls dont hate me but heres 2k of me writing yet another semi fic that started out as headcanons and ended up with me writing a story. (also you can pry cheer captain! penelope park from my cold dead hands) (a huge thanks to @posh-with-2-fields for helping me write this)

hope: big ass loner in school but last year she punched rafael waithe in the face after he harassed a girl (the girl was lizzie Saltzman, whom she is completely in love with) so everyone admires her (the guys are kinda scared of her)

josie: the quiet saltzman twin, really fucking smart. she’s in the school like orchestra thing (school band??) and she plays piano. she also plays in the field hockey team with her twin. (she wants to focus on her music but she’s afraid of what lizzie will say)

penelope park: ur perfect hbic, captain of the cheer squad. super smart and openly gay. (she’s a fucking rebel, can tear you down with her words and all the girls wanna get in her pants)

lizzie saltzman: hbic 2.0, captain of the field hockey team. secretly in love with hope ever since the girl punched raf in the face when he was harassing her in the locker room. she just admires hope from afar bc she’s afraid her reputation will fall if she were to ask hope out

then they have to do a group project (with a partner). Lizzie gets paired with hope and josie gets paired with penelope

lizzie and hope work on the project in the twins room. Lizzie told josie to go to penelope’s dorm (“josie don’t you dare fall for her charms”)

(people say penelope is a player and people know her as a player (surprise surprise shes not)

So, lizzie being completely in love with hope (but still denying it) keeps accidentally flirting with hope and hope being the useless gay she is gets completely flustered whenever she does it. (lizzie keeps touching her and she CANT DEAL WITH THE SOFT TOUCHES)

Penelope and josie meet up to work on the project on days penelope doesn’t have cheer practice (josie loves how seriously she takes being captain, on Fridays she has practice early so they can still work on their project and penelope always tells her how proud she is of the girls on her squad)

(josie is slowly finding out penelope is definitely not the heartless bitch lizzie describes her as) (maybe she is slowly falling for the charm that is penelope park) (maybe she’s okay with that)

on the days penelope has cheer practice she has to walk by the music room to get to her dorm. Since two weeks ago there has been a girl in there playing piano and singing. (penelope first heard her two weeks ago, now she sits against the door every Monday and Wednesday listening to this girl play and sing)

she doesn’t know who the girl is. (the girl locks the door behind her (yes penelope tried to open it once) she might be falling in love with her voice (she tries to find that voice every school day (shes afraid she’ll never find the girl).

At the same time penelope starts to fall for josie Saltzman. Her soft smiles, her willingness to help other people, her terrible jokes (she tells josie they’re terrible, she loves them). She asks pedro (the kid she tutors) if it’s possible to fall for 2 people at the same time.

While they’re working on the project hope and lizzie get to know each other and grow closer. Lizzie tells hope how much she hates the fact that her mom and dad are always travelling, that they never have time for her and josie. Hope shows lizzie the painting she made of her dad (he died 7 years ago, hope still misses him more than anything)

Hope loves how she and lizzie have become friends (it still stings when lizzie treats her as a mere acquaintance when in the presence of her friends, she tells herself that having a friendship behind closed doors is enough (it’s not)

3 days before they have to present the project to their class penelope’s roommate decides to invite her boyfriend over. Josie and penelope cant use the twins dorm either because hope and lizzie are working on their project in there so josie suggests they use the music room. She tells penelope she has a key to that room so she can practice during after school hours. (when josie sits down at the piano and starts playing a quick tune penelope recognizes the song as the same one she heard mystery piano girl play yesterday)

That is the moment penelope park realizes two girls shes falling in love with (the one with the beautiful voice and the one with the soft smiles and terrible jokes) are actually the same girl.

Back at the twins dorm hope and lizzie are sitting on lizzies bed joking around (they finished the project like 3 hours ago)

After a joke hope makes she falls into lizzie and when she looks up lizzie’s face is suddenly very close to hers, she decides to just go for it and kisses lizzie (who is she kidding she has been trying to pick up the courage to kiss lizzie for years (she has been a bit in love with the girl ever since she first saw her at freshman year)

Lizzie kisses back for a few seconds before she suddenly rips herself away and jumps from the bed. And asks hope what the hell shes doing.

Hope is like... i thought you would be okay with this. Lizzie tells her she would never want to date a girl or kiss a girl let alone hope of all people (2 seconds after she says this she hates herself for saying it, it may have something to do with absolute broken look on hopes face)

Hope’s still standing in her room and lizzie doesn’t know what to do (she’s afraid shell break down crying if hope doesn’t leave soon)

Hope is starting to walk towards her so she yells out get the fuck away from me mikaelson (she hasn’t called hope “mikaelson” in weeks, it sounds foreign on her tongue, she hates it)

After hope basically runs out of the door she collapses on her bed silently crying. After a few minutes she hears the telltale sound of josies laugh coming down from the hallway (her heart hurts knowing josie found her person, that she dares to be open about who she loves) she doesn’t want to take her sisters happy moment away so she pretends to be asleep

The following days leading up to the presentation hope somehow manages to avoid every type of interaction with lizzie (one time she literally jumps out of a window to avoid being in the same room as lizzie)

Lizzie tells herself its fine, she tells herself her reputation would have been ruined (she’s not fine, her eyes automatically look for hope in every room and she misses her more than anything)

On the day of the presentation hope walks into the classroom. Lizzie thinks her heart might have skipped a beat (maybe even 3).

Penelope’s and josies presentation is flawless. (lizzie feels a pang when she sees the absolute adoration in both penelopes and josies eyes, she glances at hope, the girl is pointedly staring at the board)

Lizzies and hopes presentation goes off without a hitch, still lizzie feels like her stomach is filled with lead (this may have something to do with hope avoiding all eye contact and her walking out of the classroom the moment the class is over)

After class penelope walks up to josie, building up the courage to finally ask the girl out (at first josie doesn’t understand, “but pen, the project is over, you don’t have to hang out with me if you don’t want to”)

After that penelope just blurts out she wants to take josie out on a date (josie blushes profusely and stammers out a yes). Penelope secretly does a tiny fist pump (josie totally sees it)

They have their first date in the music room (but josie, babe, for me this is the place where it all started) and penelope kisses josie right after josie finishes the song she played when penelope first heard her (you sat here all these days and i had no idea!!)

Its a week after the presentations and hope is still not talking to lizzie (lizzie is starting to doubt if her reputation is worth all this pain) (people are starting to notice her staring at hope all the time too, shes not even sure if that bothers her anymore)

It all comes to head when penelope asks her about hope. (ever since penelope got paired up with josie their relationship has been less strained, now that pen is dating josie they even consider themselves friends)

Lizzie breaks down (penelope freaks out at first and texts josie to come to the twins dorm a s a p) and eventually lizzie tells josie and penelope everything. About hope, about having fallen for the girl, about them growing closer, about hope kissing her. And about lizzie freaking out, being afraid of her reputation falling, and pushing hope away so far shes afraid shell never get the girl back.

Josie tries to talk to her but eventually it’s penelope’s words that stick with lizzie (honestly liz, reputation isn’t important, in 10 years everyone will forget about who you were in high school, especially all these other “popular bitches”, the people who stay with you are the important ones, hope is one of those people)

After this lizzie starts to actually be herself, not the version she wanted to be to stay popular. She sits with penelope and josie (usually mg, kaleb, jed, and landon join)

When one of the players from the football team asks her out during lunch break she finds herself saying no. When he asks why she tells him shes in love with someone else and that this girl is so much better than him. (lizzie later realizes that she basically came out to the whole school, in the moment itself, all she saw was hope mikaelson staring at her from across the room)

A week later Rafael waithe again manages to corner her in the locker room (taunting her about the fact that a date with him will get her straight again)

He starts walking towards her but before he can set 3 steps someone steps in front of him and punches him in the face (lizzie knows its hope, she’d recognize her anywhere)

After Rafael walks away (once again with a broken nose) hope asks her if shes okay (hope is talking to her and lizzie has never been more okay)

Hope starts to walk away (im glad you’re okay lizzie)

Before she can do that lizzie grabs her hand, spins her around and kisses her. Hope stands still for a full 2 seconds (lizzie starts to back away thinking she made a mistake, that she truly went too far, that hope will never forgive her) before she grabs lizzie and smashes their lips together

When they finally catch their breaths (hope has lizzie pinned against the lockers) hope asks her what changed.

Lizzie just tells her she changed (and that someone made her realize hope is worth so much more than a freaking reputation and girls she doesn’t even want to be friends with) (she also tells her shes so sorry for the way she treated hope, that she wont ever forgive herself for doing that)

Hope just smiles and kisses her again (they stay in the locker room so long the janitor has to pull them out of it)

3 weeks later penelope walks away from her cheer practice with lizzie (who just finished her own practice) when they walk through the school they hear music coming from the music room. When penelope opens the door they find josie and hope sitting by the piano. Josie is trying to learn hope a song (even though hope sucks at playing piano)

They both look up at the same time seeing their girlfriends (softly smiling at them from the door opening, wondering how they got so lucky)

#legacies #hizzie #posie #legaciesdaily #so i wrote yet another 2k of shit #and its still no fic #my hcs #anyway you can pry this au from my cold dead hands #long post #fic #p #hs au #josie saltzman #lizzie saltzman #hope mikaelson #penelope park

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miggy-figgy · 7 years

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Rossy De Palma Rossy de Palma, born in Palma de Mallorca, was originally a singer and dancer before being discovered by filmmaker Pedro Almodóvar in 1986. He cast her in roles based on her unique appearance which are best described as a Picasso come-to-life. In 1988, Rossy de Palma broke the rules of beauty when she starred in Pedro Almodóvar’s Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown and became a model and muse for designers like Jean-Paul Gaultier and Thierry Mugler. Her status as an iconic fashion face was further cemented with her role in Robert Altman’s 1994 satirical fashion film Prêt-à-Porter. Today, she is a theater actress, charity spokesperson for the Ghanian Charity, OrphanAid Africa, and the face of luxury fashion ad campaigns. Some of the roles you’ve played in Almodóvar films include talk show host, drug dealer, a daughter trapped in a small town living with a hysterical mother, a snobby woman from Madrid, and now, in Julieta you play a malicious housekeeper who doesn’t know much of the world outside her own. You’ve been one of the most consistent Chica Almodóvar in the director’s filmography. Why do you think he always comes back to you? Well, not always. Out of 20 movies, I’ve only been in seven. It’s a pleasure to work with him. I mold myself well, and he knows that with me, he can do whatever he wants. I’m devoted to him and that has its advantages because he knows that I’m effective. I’ll give him whatever he wants. Do you remember the first time you met Pedro Almodóvar? Of course. Legend has it that we met in a bar. But, we met during the years of the Movida Madrileña. I had just arrived to the capital from Mallorca with my music group, Peor Imposible and he used to come to our shows. By that time he was already an underground legend. He had just wrapped What Have I Done to Deserve This? and was beginning to work on Matador. He was casting for that film, but I couldn’t make it because I had a concert in Alicante that same day. He was starting to nag me and I decided to play hard to get. I was going to seduce him from afar. He used to come to a bar I was working at, the King Creole and offered me a small role in Law of Desire. He asked me “Would you like to?” and I responded “Yes, yes; I couldn’t make it to the Matador casting” and he replied, “Ok, well, let’s go.”He was very happy with me. He wanted to portray who I was in Law of Desire. I did my own hair and makeup; I didn’t allow wardrobe to touch my look. I wanted to immortalize who I was aesthetically at that time. I played a TV journalist; but since I was dressed as myself, I didn’t feel like an actress. But, then, when he wrote me the part of Antonio Banderas’ snobby girlfriend in Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown it was much more fun because that was the first time I worked as an actual actress. Did you work in any other movies between Law of Desire and Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown? No. In the beginning of my career I only worked with Pedro because I was also focused on my music project. Later on, I started working in more films, but in Italy. I haven’t really worked much in Spain until recently. In Spain I only worked with Pedro. Did you want to be an actress when you were a young girl? I’ve been an actress from an early age because I acted differently around each person. I noticed that you had to become a different person. I was conscious that you needed to have a different psychology for each person in order to unite each of your complexities. I was also aware of the simulacra of things. I’ve always felt more of an artist than an actress. I like to keep various creative channels open. I would say that poetry was my first love. The Dadaist poets opened up this whole new dimension of thinking that made me aware that there was another world out there waiting for me. I recently worked in a performance called Residencia de Amor that deals with that: how art helps you survive and how therapeutic it is. Think of it as being the ugly ducking and suddenly you leave, and in this new world you are a Disney character. Tapping into that place of my consciousness without knowing that there was another world waiting for me really cheered me up. Then, also, you need to have music, art and all sorts of things that lift you in order to live another kind of reality because real life is tough. Have you always been connected to your voice within? Yes. I’ve always been connected to that spirit that we all have inside. In fact, I’m very rational; but everything I do creatively I do it from my unconsciousness. I like to surprise myself and see things as if they were the first time I saw them. When I have to interpret a character, I don’t like to prepare and study for it. I like to come from stillness. I welcome and work with accidents and errors. It enriches your life. You can’t think that you can control everything. You can’t control anything. No, you can’t. I don’t believe in that vanity that some artists who think they are creators. No. I believe that everything comes from a collective unconsciousness and when we allow ourselves to be receptive we become vehicles for it but we are not the protagonists. We can’t think, “Oh, I’m going to sit down and write a song.” No. That song came to you from the thousands of influences you have. You are a vehicle for art. I don’t believe in painters who are so self-deprecating. I prefer the humility behind being receptors and we are vehicles for creativity. We’re all artists. Julieta is a great film. His female characters continue to be his strongest suit. Yes. Isn’t this music very 90s? (Forever Young plays in the background) My partner says that time does not exist. My daughter tells me, “Mom, you’re so lucky to have lived in the 80s!” Yes, she’s right. No one can take those memories from me; but especially to have survived that decade, because so many didn’t make it. If it wasn’t drugs, it was AIDS and also the road. In those days the roads in Spain were awful; many fellow musicians like Tino Casal died in tragic car accidents. OD’s, AIDS and the road. Madre mía. All pathways. (Both laugh) And how did you make it? I was very mature in the 80s. I was in my 20s. My adolescence was in my 30s. I was serious in my 20s. All of my friends were getting high and I was everyone’s mother. I protected my friends. I was “homeless” but I had a daily planner. Pedro was always mesmerized by this; “look at her, she’s so organized!” Maybe it’s because you’re a Virgo. Yes, I am. Perhaps it’s that. But I had also moved from Mallorca to Madrid. I left behind my teenage brother and he needed me. My mother was hustling through the market in order to save enough money to send me 3000 pesetas [about $20] in a money order each month. It was so little and it was all she could. With that in mind, I knew I wasn’t there to waste time. I had to pave my road and if not, I went back home. I couldn’t distract myself. I was very clear with my intention. I also didn’t like drugs. Only weed. I don’t like drugs that affect my mindset and take me to other realities because the reality that we live in is already rough enough and psychedelic itself to take me somewhere else. I mean, back in the day we tried everything but weed, the relaxing kind. Sativa’s great but I’m more of an Indica girl. I didn’t get hooked to anything because I wanted to work and build. Let’s be realistic there is no money when you are starting out in music; so even when I worked at bars, I was a bad cocktail waitress because I wanted my patrons to stop drinking. They drank, and drank, and drank. I would tell them, “listen buddy, you just had one…” and the bar owners would come and tell me “This is not Alcoholic Anonymous, you’re here to sell drinks. Be cool. Don’t be such a…” Don’t be so conscious… “Don’t be such a good girl…” I love playing evil characters but in life I’m such a good person. I’m a softy and I’m very sentimental. You know what I mean? That’s my personality. In theatre I like to play the bad girl because I compensate for being so good in real life. How do you channel it? Your character in Julieta is so malicious. You can’t judge a character because if not, you wouldn’t be able to interpret them. In an interview with Almodóvar, they ask him how can he create such evil characters and he says that he humanizes them. He starts living with the characters; what they eat? What kind of music they like? Yes. Yes. You have to humanize. I already told you that I like playing with the subconscious. I am so at ease to work with Pedro. First of all, he re-enacts exactly what he wants. You have to be careful not to copy him nor imitate him too much because if not, then you look like you’re imitating Pedro. You have to take it to your turf. But, he will do what he wants you to do. Down to a T. He’s very precise. He knows what he wants. And then you’re at ease because he’s moving you around and if you slip he will say, “No, no I don’t want you standing there.” He’s also obsessed with the tone of voice. “This word is too low. Higher…; This one went too high, I want it lower…,” “This one went too low, I want it higher.” Or “You’re dropping your voice.” Obsessed. He has an ear that works for him and it’s impressive what he can do with it. I let go. I surrender to him. Anyone would. You’d be surprised… Some can’t do it because they don’t have the consciousness to process that Almodóvar is directing them. The important thing is to flow. Absolutely flow. You have to be at ease. Almodóvar is directing you. He will be precise. Really, you just got to play… We played a lot with this character because the newcomers, Adriana Ugarte (who plays the younger version of Julieta) and Daniel Grao (who plays Xoan, Julieta’s partner) had never worked with him. Before each take, he’d tell me, “Now, don’t tell them anything but when I scream ACTION! You come in expelling and shouting random things like “You don’t have a bathing suit? Well, I have a pair of old bragas that you could use.” They didn’t know what to do. Dumbfounded, they’d ask, “Is this going in?” They didn’t know what was going on! We had so much fun. Even though there was a seriousness in the character, when we were filming we had a lot of fun.”

What’s the thing you like the most about New York? It’s that thing I was telling you. That the distance between you and yourself is the shortest one. It’s great to know yourself here. No one looks at you. Everybody minds his or her business. There is a connection between you and your inner self that’s very important to know in order to evolve as a person. To get to know yourself and who you are. I almost moved here before I had my kids, moved to Paris and destiny took me somewhere else. But I almost did it with my friend Dorothy who lives here. We almost bought a townhouse. Back then they were so cheap.

Back to Julieta, it is a movie that touches your core. It leaves an emotional well. It’s hard to swallow. Three or four days after seeing it you’re getting flashbacks. It’s the kind of movie that leaves a scar. Sort of an echo… don’t you think? A few days go by and boom, another flash. I left in a state of shock. I had to drive after seeing it and I was so worried to be on the road; because the film left me a bit loopy. I was distraught.

It makes you think. The silence. The secrets. All that is dragged down due to miscommunication. But, it’s a movie that you have to let it breathe. Like in the beginning when you see that red creature and you don’t know what it is just to find out that it’s her breathing through the red nightgown. Everything goes in… smoothly. There’s no need to time stamp “three years earlier” or “two days later”. Everything flows. Time just comes in by itself.

Through her hairstyles. Well, that towel seen is marvelous. Reading that scene in the script was already a gem. I’d think, “what a beautiful transition”. You were excited by reading it. And the ending, which I can’t talk about you’re like “oh my God” A bit shaken. The way he moves the camera. You need to let it breathe…

Everyone somehow, someway sympathizes with Julieta. We’ve all gone through those moments of silence, assuming situations and changing your life in order to carry on. Or people who never speak again. It’s what Pedro would tell us in order to understand where he was coming from. Try to investigate what makes two people stop loving themselves. They stop communicating. They can’t look at themselves in the same way. They begin to have secrets. A black hole comes between them.

They say that it’s because you didn’t give the other what he or she wanted. Who knows? Each relationship is unique. I think the root (of couples separating) is misunderstandings. It’s a chain of consequences of misunderstandings and people take it personally when some things shouldn’t be a certain way. And then each one starts to victimize themselves and they start a competition of who suffers the most. Right?

And they don’t sit down to think. “Wait a minute. My partner is suffering too.” Yep. And then you can’t get close. I am dealing with things in personal life where I cannot tolerate to have my arm twisted any longer. It’s now not a question of “I don’t want to be dominated because I was once a super softy that always ended up forgiving everyone and now I am at a moment in my life where I can’t have relationships that fail me. Know what I’m saying? Even if they are family and people who I’ve loved for years I cannot give them that power any longer. It’s like “enough is enough”. Not even God can fail me now. Anything that drives you forward, yes. Everything that, as the French would say”, baton dans la rue, clipping your wings… I don’t want that.

Even if I adore you; I can’t give you that power. Sometimes if you don’t get to that point it’s like you can’t ever go back but it’s not about that. You need to seal things. Let the other know that you need your space. It’s more of a male to female dominance, patriarchal thing. I’m in another moment of my life. I finally learned to love myself. Just recently, really. To really love myself.

Me too. And now I can’t lose any of this gained momentum. I don’t want anything that fails nor hurts me. And if you have to re-enforce yourself, you do. You put on an emotional corset, tighten that shell and “nobody gonna come in there. No more, darling.” No more. That’s it. It’s a way of loving yourself without stopping to love other people; of course.

Of course. You have to learn to love yourself. Of course. I think you really have to learn to love yourself before you can really experiment love from others and let yourself be loved. If you don’t love yourself the right way, no one will. I’m sorry. It’s the truth.

And especially in an industry like this one. I’ve always been an outsider in every industry. I’m free and willing; I’m everywhere but I’m not anchored anywhere. I like that thing of not belonging. I’m not compromised to any political party. I’m an individualist and an anarchist. I cut it. I eat it. I don’t know… a little bit of freedom… Just having to answer to one person; yourself.

I’m going through a very similar process. You see yourself through what I’ve been going through. How old are you?

Thirty-three. You’re so young, that’s good! Well, look… it’s better to go through it now than when you’re my age. I’ve taken longer. But the important thing is to make it. I may be 52 but I feel like a young girl.

You need to keep your spirit young. Absolutely! Curiosity is fresh and although we’ve all suffered and everything; my innocence is still very fresh.

It’s in your eyes… …of a child. Yes, yes. I can’t stop being a little girl. When we’re children, that’s when we’re more authentic, when we really get to be our genuine selves. You can’t ever lose that. Ok?

It’s so challenging to live in a world that doesn’t want us to be our true selves. They want us like cattle; all the same. That’s why you always have to rebel.

How did you start? I mean, let’s start with my nose… Would you like some? How about a nose and a half! Although, it did help me hide that part of me that was more complex, no one could really see me and they just focused on my aesthetic.

I meant to ask you about that. Talking about my nose is cliché, but we can talk about it if you like. Beauty is so relative. What is really beautiful is nature; flowers… How can there be evil in the world when we have flowers? A thing as beautiful as flowers. Published in the February 2017 issue of Iris Covet Book. Photography by Sophy Holland | Styling by René Garza | Art Direction by Louis Liu

#rossy de palma #pedro almodovar #almodovar #chica almodovar #spain #actress #interview #iris covet book #icon #muse #sophy holland #rene garza #marc sifuentes #louis liu #miguel figueroa #miggy figgy #life #self love

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reneeacaseyfl · 5 years

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Domingo German, the Yankees’ Surprising Ace, Has an Ideally Flawed Mentor

To become the Yankees’ most improved pitcher this season, and a bulwark in their unsteady starting rotation, Domingo German got technical help from the most obvious authority, the team’s pitching coach. For the bigger picture, though, when he needed personal and professional mentoring, German turned to an unusual source — a once-promising pitcher who struggled immensely in his own major league career.

German could have easily sought help through the large network of baseball stars from the Dominican Republic, his home country, including the Hall of Famer Pedro Martinez, who is known for dispensing wisdom to young pitchers.

Instead German contacted Daniel Cabrera, a virtual stranger now working for a real estate company in the Dominican. The two had never met or spoken before, even though they came from the same municipality, San Pedro de Macorís, a hotbed of baseball talent. Their relationship started last summer with an Instagram direct message.

“There are a ton of other people, like Pedro and other former pitchers, and people much closer to him than me,” Cabrera, 38, said in Spanish in a telephone interview. “But that’s why I say it was a work of God. He was put in my path.”

A right hander like German, Cabrera pitched from 2004 to ‘09, mostly with the Baltimore Orioles. He had a career 5.10 earned run average and walked a lot of batters, yet he kept getting opportunities because of the tantalizing potential in his 6-foot-7 frame and his high-90s fastball.

But it was the failures that made Cabrera seem like an ideal choice to guide the cheerful, soft-spoken German. As he struggled through a rough 2018 season, ultimately posting a 5.57 E.R.A., German sent Cabrera a direct message on Instagram.

German, 26, had been meaning to reach out to Cabrera for some time. There were several things about Cabrera that stood out to German, from the trajectory of his career to the family photographs that filled his Instagram page.

“He and I have the same personality and the same way of living,” German said.

Soon the two exchanged phone numbers and began talking frequently, German requesting counsel, something he said he had never sought out before like that.

Cabrera told German that he saw glimpses of Martinez in him. He told German that he had tons of talent but needed to make sure his focus was on baseball. He also told German that he needed to ramp up his aggressiveness on the mound, a trait Cabrera lacked when he pitched.

More than anything, Cabrera told German about his failures.

“If I could redo my career, I would have left many things behind,” Cabrera said. “Things that had nothing to do with baseball. My career could have been different. I told him: ‘Don’t let what happened to me happen to you. I wish I could’ve found someone back then to tell me what I’m telling you now.’”

Because he came from humble beginnings, Cabrera said, he enjoyed life in the major leagues too much. After a poor performance, he tried to forget about it by going out and having fun — ignoring advice from his brothers.

“The real workhorse pitchers, when they have a bad game, they’re at the field first thing, working so that the next game doesn’t go the same way,” Cabrera said.

Cabrera said German was different because he was willing to follow the counsel of an elder. So when German asked Cabrera this year about helping him find an apartment to buy in the Dominican capital, Santo Domingo, Cabrera told German to wait.

“I bought an apartment on the beach when I was having a good season,” Cabrera said. “So when I was playing, I thought a lot, ‘Man, how great would it be to be in the Dominican at my apartment?’ So my mind was on the Dominican when it should have been on baseball.”

German and Cabrera still talk weekly. Cabrera has watched German’s starts from afar and offered tips, and as German fixed his delivery over the winter, he sent video of the changes to Cabrera. They have also discussed the pain in German’s left hip, which turned out to be a strained hip flexor that led to a month on the injured list.

“He’s not a person who will get into a long discussion to tell me something,” German said. “He says it short and direct, and it’s helpful. If he does something, he does it for love. He does it because he really wanted to help someone.”

One of the biggest factors in German’s breakout season has been an improved curveball. Over the off-season, he and Larry Rothschild, the Yankees’ longtime pitching coach, met at the team’s spring training facility in Tampa, Fla., to go over video.

They noticed that two critical elements of German’s pitching mechanics had changed from 2017, when he made a promising major league debut, to 2018. First, German’s lead arm was dropping too much in his delivery, which affected the angle of his body and his command. Second, his back leg was bent more, and his command had been better when the leg was straighter.

The results in 2019: Entering his start on Wednesday, German had an 11-2 record and 3.40 E.R.A., which is the best on the team. Opponents were hitting .142 and whiffing 48 percent of the time they swing at his curveball, according to Baseball Savant, making his curve one of the most difficult to hit in the majors. Rothschild said German’s confidence had grown as the season progressed.

“I’ve very satisfied with myself and those that have helped me,” German said early this season.

Although German has proved invaluable to the Yankees in the absence of the ace Luis Severino and the inconsistencies of others starters like James Paxton, C. C. Sabathia and J.A. Happ, his role could change. The Yankees are targeting pitching upgrades ahead of the July 31 trade deadline, and if they acquire another starter, German could end up in the bullpen.

German went into this season expecting an innings limit of some sort. He has never thrown more than 124 in a season, and he logged only 94 last year between the major and minor leagues. He has already pitched 86 innings this season, including four during a rehabilitation assignment in the minors. For young pitchers, a substantial workload increase is viewed as potentially harmful.

“If it looks like he’s getting tired and different things, you want to prevent an injury, not react to it,” Rothschild said last month.

If German stays in the rotation, he might not get far past his previous career high in innings anyway, because of the injury. Should the Yankees acquire another starting pitcher, German could be an option as a hard thrower in the bullpen.

“He keeps very much earning himself that spot” in the rotation, Yankees Manager Aaron Boone said last week after German’s 11th win.

“But we also feel like with Domingo, no matter what our team is like moving forward, depending how much volume he gets to, he can fill so many pretty exciting roles for us — whether it’s as a starter or a guy that can give you multiple innings in a key spot out of the bullpen or a high leverage spot late — you feel good handing him the ball. So right now, he’s in a really good place.”

German has said all the right things about any uncertainty surrounding his role. “Wherever they put me in the game, I’ll do my job and help the team,” he said.

And no matter what happens, German will have his mentor a phone call away. Cabrera once pitched out of the bullpen.

Credit: Source link

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velmaemyers88 · 5 years

Text

Domingo German, the Yankees’ Surprising Ace, Has an Ideally Flawed Mentor

“He and I have the same personality and the same way of living,” German said.

Soon the two exchanged phone numbers and began talking frequently, German requesting counsel, something he said he had never sought out before like that.

More than anything, Cabrera told German about his failures.

“The real workhorse pitchers, when they have a bad game, they’re at the field first thing, working so that the next game doesn’t go the same way,” Cabrera said.

“I’ve very satisfied with myself and those that have helped me,” German said early this season.

“If it looks like he’s getting tired and different things, you want to prevent an injury, not react to it,” Rothschild said last month.

“He keeps very much earning himself that spot” in the rotation, Yankees Manager Aaron Boone said last week after German’s 11th win.

German has said all the right things about any uncertainty surrounding his role. “Wherever they put me in the game, I’ll do my job and help the team,” he said.

And no matter what happens, German will have his mentor a phone call away. Cabrera once pitched out of the bullpen.

Credit: Source link

The post Domingo German, the Yankees’ Surprising Ace, Has an Ideally Flawed Mentor appeared first on WeeklyReviewer.

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weeklyreviewer · 5 years

Text

Domingo German, the Yankees’ Surprising Ace, Has an Ideally Flawed Mentor

“He and I have the same personality and the same way of living,” German said.

Soon the two exchanged phone numbers and began talking frequently, German requesting counsel, something he said he had never sought out before like that.

More than anything, Cabrera told German about his failures.

“The real workhorse pitchers, when they have a bad game, they’re at the field first thing, working so that the next game doesn’t go the same way,” Cabrera said.

“I’ve very satisfied with myself and those that have helped me,” German said early this season.

“If it looks like he’s getting tired and different things, you want to prevent an injury, not react to it,” Rothschild said last month.

“He keeps very much earning himself that spot” in the rotation, Yankees Manager Aaron Boone said last week after German’s 11th win.

German has said all the right things about any uncertainty surrounding his role. “Wherever they put me in the game, I’ll do my job and help the team,” he said.

And no matter what happens, German will have his mentor a phone call away. Cabrera once pitched out of the bullpen.

Credit: Source link

The post Domingo German, the Yankees’ Surprising Ace, Has an Ideally Flawed Mentor appeared first on WeeklyReviewer.

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pramos03 · 6 years

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new in town.

My life is about to go in a million of transitions coming up. Way too many to even count. I’m about to leave an internship I’m currently in, going home for a second, going to Texas for a month, and lastly moving all the way to Portland, Oregon. If you were to ask how I was feeling, it’s been a rollercoaster. I’m stressed, I’m anxious, and insert every other psychological disorder in the books. This change that I’m sensing is like a wave that I see forming in the distance. Getting bigger and bigger, and I realize I can’t move, therefore this wave will soon hit me and every ounce of water will surface my entire body. I’m thrilled at the thought in theory of being able to bounce between places, explore new cities, build new relationships, and indulge myself in my pretentious ways of being. Something is challenging about this I must admit. I’ve lived in Colorado since ever I can remember. My mom chased me around the backyard with a broomstick, I dug my fingers beneath the dirt with my childhood best friend, I rode around on my bike mid rainstorms in the heat of July. I bought a checkerboard bracelet to complete my emo look, found a girlfriend (lol), broke up with this girlfriend, danced my ass off in my high school dances, went to college, participated in student governement, found my best friend, came out, went to my first gay bar, graduated, went to an internship that I’m not so fond of and now here we go. Sure, that was alot and could’ve summarized all that in one sentence. Here’s the thing though, it’s also all been instrumental in my life development and comical to realize this has happened in such a short span. Colorado has my heart and I think it’ll be difficult to leave my heart and voyage off to foreign grounds.

I’m currently in an internship that I feel 50/50 about. I love my students (a good chunk of them at least) they literally make me laugh all the time and it’s relaxing in our ability to share laughs. Some of the people I’ve met have also been beyond special and can’t wait to reconnect one day! Others, I can’t wait to allow them to disintegrate slowly into my memories. I closely work with a supervisor who like all of us probably here, has their own shit to deal with but I’ve realized it’s beyond difficult to work with them and feel good about my work at the end of the day. All in all, listen with intent and don’t just listen for things you want to hear. Challenge yourself to new ideas, and don’t give yourself challenges that make you feel comfortable. They are one source of me wanting to leave. PRONTO. (Now I’m obligated to buy them a going away gift....)

Alamosa, Colorado. The armpit of Colorado. I am constantly confused in what people find spectacular about this place, the scenery is spectacular. The scenery from afar at least. Yet I also feel like it’s a micro bubble of comfort enclosed by 2 distinct mountain ranges. Many of the people have lived here for ages, some born and raised, some have never left, some have no idea of life beyond the SLV. Some have left and for some reason have come back to live the simple life. I can respect it and I respect their ideas of comfort as I’ve created that for myself. This is a place where you only have to worry about your job, your home, and perhaps running to the grocery store in attempts of finding a good bargain on chicken. That’s Alamosa. My hope is that people create their own ambitions, realize their own goals, and venture on out of this micro-bubble in pursuits of the unknown. The world can be scary, but also fruitful. My advice is: you don’t achieve the shots you don’t take. I want to feel alive, I want to thrive, and I want to see the world. Here isn’t that.

I think I mentioned somewhere that my internship is almost over. At this point lets play a game, take a shot each time I say “my internship is almost over”. Anyways, I sincerely loved my alone time. I’ve gotten to explore things about me and the world around me with a critical and loving eye. I’m thankful but I feel as I sufficed being in isolation. My friends and family bring immense value to me, I miss them dearly and cannot wait to hug and laugh with them once again. Hang out, grab margs, and go to the mall. Yet again, there’s only so much alone time you can have before you’re feeling complete once again. I need young people around me, because I’m not ready to settle down and become a 50 year old man on retirement....yet.

Another thought I wanted to touch on. So I have a really good friend who I feel I’ve disappointed but I’ll touch on that in a bit. Pedro, you mentioned a friend. What does friendship mean to you? It’s bond you have with a person in which they laugh, celebrate, challenge, and help you accomplish your best life. They’ll high five you when you’ve accomplished, and stare at you with empathy when you’re sobbing on their couch. They’re also happy that you’re happy and learning so much about yourself and growing. They’re happy to have you come back in town to tell them everything that is going on. They’re happy and curious as to who are the new people who have creeped into your life! It’s funny because like I mentioned life is complete roller coaster lately. I have severe FOMO. In retrospect, I don’t really have friends here in Alamosa and it’s kinda depressing to think about. But it’s true though. William, if you ever read this: you’ve blossomed into this confident and laidback guy everyone wants to hang out with. They have a reason to because you’re a catch. I’m glad you’re finding your niche in Denver, slinging stellar lattes, going to shows, and holding your head held high. You inspire me. You’ve managed to make new friends at work and at your local coffee shop. Sure I’ve rolled my eyes in jealously I must admit but I’m 90000% genuinely excited you get to allow new people pop into your life. Bethany and her boyfriend sound beyond awesome and can’t wait to meet them. I mean it. As a friend I should support you and be excited for you in all the directions you’re going. But my petty self has gotten in the way. My insecurities. My fears. You’ve been nothing but supportive of me, I should be able to do the same and I’ll continue to try doing so. You’ve done nothing wrong, in fact I’m the one who has it all wrong. I’m deeply apologetic. So here is my pledge. I have control over how I react and feel to some things. I strongly believe so. I will continue to support you in the ways you need, and cheer you on in the upcoming changes you embark. Wow....dick move William, you’ve taught me something and that something is how to be a more kind and chilled out human being.

I’m all over the place lately. I’m filled with shame, hope, change, and a couple lattes too many. I think this is enough for now.

Signing off,

Pedro

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