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queenoftheworldisdead · 2 months ago

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The Night Shift

Chapter 2

A/N: Reader is female. No physical descriptors used. Let me know if i fucked up and not do that. Chat me up i don't bite!

Warning: Adult content only! 18+ only please. Dark! NON-CON, sexual assault, Sleep paralysis, roofed, oral.

Summary: You start a new job at the best hotel and resort in your beautiful beach town. Things start to go bad when your transferred to the night shift.

Jonathan Pine x Reader

🌺

The dreaded time has come. You’d tried to prepare, but sleeping during the day was still somewhat impossible.

From the time clock you hear the cheerful chatter from the 2nd shifters. They’ll be more happy to see you than you than the other way around.

As you near the archway to the lobby, you spot Sarah, Connie and Amber busy at work. You haven’t really gotten to know the other two yet; they always seemed a bit distant. They probably thought you’re weird, like everyone else in your life. Maybe that’s the real reason why they moved you to the graveyard shift.

Sarah spots you and waves. You’re gonna miss her. She was the only friend you’d made so far, and now you’d be back to square one.

Third shift ran on a skeleton crew you found out. One clerk, you, and one manager, Mr. Pine, who you suspected would be holed up in his office all night like the other managers. Housekeeping and security were always on the move, never in one spot for long, and worked out of a separate building, making it nearly impossible to even cross paths. The kitchen was fully staffed but always hectic and intimidating, and shutdown at midnight.

If you could have your phone, you could push through the impending loneliness, but it was strictly against policy to have them during shifts.

“Ready for your all nighter?”

The sudden voice snaps you out of your thoughts, and you let out a squeak. Heads turn from the lobby to you. You quickly lower your gaze and hide, their attention doesn’t last, but it’s still embarrassing.

“Oh, sorry darling, I didn’t mean to startle you.” Mr. Pine apologizes, patting your back comfortingly.

You stiffen when his hand slips to the small of your back and lingers a bit longer than you’d like. He’s probably just being nice, you reason, but the thought doesn’t quite ease the awkwardness.

You force a small smile and he releases, as if it was what he was waiting for.

“I-It’s ok. I was just a little startled. I didn’t notice you there.” You reply, still a little frazzled.

“I’ve been told I’m a bit light-footed. I’ll do better next time and try to make myself a little less invisible." He remarks with a grin. You appreciate the light-heated attempt to comfort you. Maybe one day you'd stop acting like a startled rabbit—but probably not.

🌺

Check-ins cool down and Connie’s the first to log off. You offer a meek goodbye before quickly scurrying away to take her spot.

Connie smiles as you cross paths, and you smile back, but realize too late that her attention is on Mr. Pine and not you.

They share a laugh and converse while you quietly take over her station, brushing off the interaction. It’s not the first time its happened, being ignored was more of what you were used to.

You log into your stations computer. Despite how modern and luxurious the hotel, the clerk computers are old and clunky and only good for handling guest and nothing more.

“Hey heads up. Bachelor party checked earlier, but left a while ago. Already drunk,” Sarah informs as she approaches. “When they get back expect a lot of noise complaints. If they get out of hand let security know, it’ll finally give them something useful to do.”

“Thanks. Will do.”

Rowdy guest were nothing new to you. If they did cut up at least it would spice up your night.

“Are you OK? You don’t look so great.” She inquires making you worry how bad you must’ve looked.

“I-I'm fine, just tired. Not used to the change yet,” you answer a bit self-conscious.

“Sarah as lovely as always,” Mr. Pine charmingly chimes in and Sarah lights up.

He’s behind you again. You should expect it by now, but you don’t. He was worse than your cat—always sneaking up on you. He really did need a bell.

🌺

Amber leaves shortly after Sarah and your left alone on the front lines. The guests dwindle to a trickle, their footsteps echoing through the empty lobby. The usual chatter, the clink of luggage wheels, the constant buzz of activity—it’s all gone, replaced by a heavy silence. Even the light feels different at this hour, dimmer, as if the hotel itself is winding down.

As the minutes stretch on, your body feels heavier, the hum of the computer and the soft ticking of the clock blending into a lullaby that pulls you into a sleepy haze. You blink slowly, fighting to stay awake, but the lack of sleep presses down on you. Shifting in place, you try to stay alert, but your vision blurs as the screen fades in and out of focus.

A sharp knock jerks you awake. You straighten upright, heart pounding, blinking away the fog. Your eyes dart to where Mr.Pine stands, his knuckles still pressed against the archway.

“Pardon me darling, I hope I didn’t catch you unaware.”

“Oh no your fine,” you stammer, stifling a yawn into your hand.

“I see I’ve arrived just in time. Here I got you this. A gift.”

He wiggles the insulated cup with the hotel logo. You raise an eyebrow, “Coffee?”

“Its salted Carmel espresso blend, compliments of the kitchen,” he replies, handing it over. “I hear it's quiet the favorite amongst the guest these days.”

“Oh you didn’t have to,” you insist, but take it anyway. The warmth bleeds through your hands, spreading a comforting heat up through you.

“Nonsense. It’s the least I could do. Especially after earlier.“ he chuckles softly. “Hope you like it.”

You take a sip and hum at the sweet taste. It’s a bit too sweet but the spike of sugar and caffeine you hope will help fight off sleep.

“Thank you.”

He smiles at your response, but you can’t keep his gaze. He is handsome, too handsome. You pray for a guest, a call, or anything to interrupt this interaction, but nothing comes. You take another big sip as he stays. It feels like he wants you to say something, but you’re the worst person for conversation.

“How have you been finding your time with us so far?” Mr. Pine asks breaking the growing awkward silence.

“Its really great everyones so nice,” you begin to answer, but you find yourself fighting to stifle another yawn. “It’s… usually busier during the day.”

He chuckles softly. “Yes, quite right the night shift’s a different beast. No rush, no chaos.” He pauses, tilting his head.

You nod taking another sip, though your mind is starting to blur. His words are becoming harder to focus on. He’s talking, asking you another question, but you feel the weight of sleep creeping in. Your eyes start to close involuntarily. The coffee isn’t helping and now your struggling to keep your eyes open.

“Darling?” Mr. Pine softening voice breaches your haze and hand touches your shoulder gently.

You blink quickly, “Sorry, I-”

“Why don’t you take this. Our little secret.” Mr. Pine interjects. He hands you a card key to your surprise. “A nice thirty minute nap might do you some good. I’ll cover for you.”

You hesitate, but your body is begging for rest. This can’t be good for your probation period. You frown and fight through your resolve.

“I couldn’t—”

“It’s fine, this won’t reflect poorly on you,” he insists, gently nudging you. “3rd shift takes some time getting used to, and it’s dead here anyway. If by some miracle it gets crazy I’ll come for you.”

His tone is easygoing, but there’s a firmness to it, as if he’s not giving you a choice. You nod defeated and head toward the back to get your phone.

Maybe he was right, if you could get few a minutes of sleep you might be able to make it to morning.

🌺

Its a struggle to make it to the third floor. Your eyelids grow heavier with each step, your body sluggish as though you're wading through molasses. The door numbers blur as you shuffle down the hallway, fighting to stay awake.

Finally, you find it and you fumble with the keycard, nearly dropping it in your exhaustion. The lock clicks, and you push the door open.

A breeze greets you as you enter. The soft neutral tones of the room blur in your vision, and the wooden accents gleam under the gentle lighting. The velvet armchair in the sitting area barely registers as your eyes fixate on the bed. King-sized, it beckons with its plump pillows, and white quilted duvet that looks as inviting as a cloud.

It’s a struggle to set your alarm, the buttons blur and you're not even sure you did it right and you’re too tired to care. Your phone lands on the nightstand with a thud as exhaustion takes over. You collapse on top of the duvet, if you don’t disturb the bed, no one will even know you were here you think.

Your body feels unbearably heavy, limbs unresponsive as you try to shift. Exhaustion pressing down as your head sinks into the pillow and the world fades away. You wait in the calm serenely, but sleep doesn’t come. Its frustrating. Dreams hover just out of reach, fragmenting and fleeting.

The soft click of the lock rouses you from the haze. Your lashes flutter open, each blink heavier than the last as you try to make out the silhouette at the doorway. Light cast a shadow over the figure as it looms quietly. The door shuts with another soft click swallowing the light with it.

Your eyes roll back and you slip back into the void and float in the darkness that surrounds you.

Through the fog you feel the bed whine and dip, gently rocking your body with it. You’re so drowsy, barely aware of what’s happening. You feel your body being shifted, but can’t quite understand why.

Your pants slip away, replaced by soft cool pecks that trail up and down your thigh slowly. Your skin bristles from the touches that trespass over your expose parts.

You mumble grumpily as you feel your thighs spread open wider and wider. Weight holds them apart and the strain begins to tingle painfully.

Desperately, you will yourself to wake up, to snap out of it. You manage to twitch your toes, but nothing else. You're frozen, trapped in your own body.

You cant see it, but you hear the slick sounds of your juices being lapped up gingerly. Your body aches as the darkness dives deep sinking into you tenderly.

It’s not right, it shouldn’t feel so good, but you can’t pull yourself out of it.

Your clit vibrates as you squeeze your eyes shut and try to ignore it, but it’s there. The sensation too intoxicating to bare. Hot breath tickles your tender bud and you moan out helplessly.

The orgasm surges throughout your body, but no sound escapes—your tight throat. Your body buzzes its so electric, but fleeting. Warmth wraps around you sinkingly, weighing you down, drifting you back into the void.

🌺

#dark jonathan pine x reader #dark jonathan pine #dark jonathan pine x woc reader #dark!jonathan pine x reader #dark!jonathan pine x black reader #dark jonathan pine x black reader

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heauxplesslydevoted · 4 years ago

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Silent Treatment (Ethan x MC)

Summary: Naomi decides that if Ethan isn’t going to treat her like a valued member of the team, she’ll teach him a little lesson.

Based on chapter 1, some spoilers for chapter 2, and my own speculation, so read at your own risk.

I highkey hate this but I’m posting it anyway

~v~

Naomi is quiet. No, she is unusually quiet. Ethan has seen her get silent when it’s time to buckle down and focus on a task, or if something is weighing heavily on her, but at this point he knows her well enough to know it’s neither of those. She’s withdrawn, and he doesn’t understand why.

Her presence is hard to miss, the young resident has enough charm and charisma in her pinky finger to dazzle an entire room. And she’s never this quiet. Naomi demands to be heard at all times. With unapologetic vivacity. With her hands. Eyes sparkling when she gets an idea, or fiery when she needs to dig her toes into something and fight. Nothing about Naomi Valentine is ever subdued, so why the hell is she so silent?

She didn’t speak much during the last few team meetings. He and Harper have led all of the conversations, bouncing ideas back and forth, building off of each other’s ideas. Occasionally, Naomi would offer input, merely to agree or disagree with a theory, before going back into her shell.

It’s even bleeding into their personal life. For the better part of the past 3 months, she’s stayed with him, the two of them holed up in his apartment in the Back Bay, but now she’s opting to stay at her own place. It’s been going on a few days now, this random despondence, and Ethan isn’t a fan of it. He’d take it a step further and say it's driving him crazy. This isn’t the woman he’s known for the past two years, even at her lowest was she never this reclusive.

As he walks down the halls of Edenbrook, he spots Naomi, her personality back to what it once was. She’s with Ines at a vending machine, and Naomi wastes no time animatedly talking to the now attending about a fun date she went on with her girlfriend.

Heart hammering wildly in his chest, Ethan swallows thickly as he listens to her talk. He’s missed the sound of her voice, the affectionate way her strong accent curls around her ‘r’s’ and dramatically elongates her ‘o’s’. It becomes clear that she’s willing to talk, just not to him. Ethan doesn’t like that idea at all, but it’s the only one that makes sense. And if that’s the case, he needs to get to the bottom of things and remedy the situation.

“Naomi, can we talk please?” He asks once Ines is no longer in their presence.

He doesn’t miss the way she bristles upon hearing his voice. But Naomi nods anyway. “Sure, what’s wrong?”

“Can we talk in the office?”

The walk back to the seventh floor is marked with awkward silence as Naomi refuses to initiate conversation with him. The more time ticks on, the more anxiety settles in Ethan’s chest. What’s going on with her that she refuses to divulge?

The office is unoccupied when they arrive, as Harper has already gone home for the evening. Naomi stands by the door, opting not to settle into a seat or even move further into the room. Everything about her body language reads that she’s poised and ready to strike at any given moment. He frowns. She’s never been this defensive against him, at least when they’re not in the middle of an argument. “What’s going on?”

“Are you okay?”

The question catches Naomi off guard. She blinks slowly before shrugging in nonchalance. “I’m fine, Ethan.”

“You’re fine? Really?”

“Is there a reason why I shouldn’t be fine?”

“Not really, but you haven’t been acting like yourself recently.”

Because you’ve been quieter than a church mouse for the past few days. You don’t talk during meetings, you’re silent when we interact with the patients, it’s like you’ve completely tuned out.”

With the way he’s been acting, Naomi is almost shocked that he even realized what she’s been doing. Wow, so maybe the great Ethan Ramsey hasn’t lost his attention to detail.

“Oh, so you’ve actually noticed?”

“I’m a diagnostician, I notice everything,” Ethan deadpans. He can feel the sarcasm wafting off of her. “What, was this an intentional act for my attention?”

“Intentional, yes. But for your attention? Not necessarily,” Naomi answers.

His eyes narrow at her, his gaze near piercing. She’s playing some sort of childish game with him, first with not speaking and now with the vague half answers. “Okay, so walk me through your thought process. Why has the cat stolen your tongue?”

“I decided that if my input wasn’t going to be valued during team discussions, I might as well not speak at all.”

Ethan gapes at her, confused. Where did that come from? “Naomi, what on earth are you talking about? When have I ever not valued your input?”

“I’m talking about the fact that for the past two cases, I’ve stood on the sidelines while you’ve either cut me off mid-sentence to talk over me, or ignore my presence altogether. I might as well blend into the wall.”

“That’s not–”

Naomi doesn’t give him the chance to refute. “Please spare me the attempt at arguing. Last week, Harper’s first day on the team, you literally had to circle back to me because you cut me off while I was speaking. And now, we’re working on a case, and you and Harper aren’t even taking this patient seriously! I’ve had to redirect the conversation and tell you guys to focus, because you two were too busy acting like bosom buddies, sharing anecdotes about hangovers, and stupid flamenco lessons, and dates you went on in the past, which is not only inappropriate and disrespectful to the patient’s time, it’s disrespectful to me.”

“So either you are completely oblivious, which I find hard to believe for someone as astute as you are, or you have no respect for me, not just as your colleague, but as the woman you claim to be in a relationship with,” Naomi continues. The floodgates have been opened and now that she’s started, she can’t stop herself. “And maybe it’s the latter, because I set that standard. I’ve let you go days, weeks, months without speaking to me with zero consequence, I’ve let you shut me out and slam doors in my face, make snide comments last year when we were treating Leland, I’ve let you have carte blanche over the pace of this relationship. I’ve always just been here and allowed your shitty social graces and piss poor communication skills to rule, and time and time again, you’ve gone unscathed, but now I’m just really tired of it.”

For the first time in a long, Ethan doesn’t have a clue what to say, and as always, Naomi is the woman who puts him in this position.

“Naomi, you can’t possibly think that I think so little of you.”

He can tell by the way her eyes darken that he put his entire foot in his mouth just now. The warning bells go off in his brain, and he scrambles to think of how he can correct this latest blunder.

Naomi bites down on her lip, and she’s actually shocked her mouth isn’t instantly flooded with the metallic taste of blood. She’s getting Punk’d obviously. The office is bugged, and Ashton Kutcher is going to jump out and announce his presence soon. That has to be it. Ethan has to be pranking her, because there’s no way a 38 year old man could ever be so dense, right? Surely his response to her grievances isn’t to dismiss her claims.

“You know what? You’re being obtuse, and we clearly aren’t getting anywhere, so I’m going to cut this conversation off now.”

She refuses to look like the psycho in this scenario and breathe any more life into this argument, and she’s not about to plead her case any further like she’s the one in the wrong.

Ethan’s eyes soften, and he takes a step forward, arms outstretched to touch, soothe whatever hurts he’s heaped upon her, but Naomi sidesteps, moving out of his reach.

If he wasn’t nervous at the start of this conversation, he is now. If the physical act of Naomi blatantly refusing to touch him wasn’t clear enough, the metaphorical chasm between the two of the just widened by a few yards as well. A chill races up and down the length of his spine.

“Naomi, I’m sorry,” Ethan says gently. “I…” His words taper off and he pauses, struggling for what he wants to say next. This has never been his strong point, being vulnerable.

And Naomi doesn’t offer him a lifeline. She’s not going to give him an out or assuage him of anything he’s currently feeling like she usually does. She’s laid out all of her cards, and things are in Ethan’s court at this point. Like always.

“I’m going home,” she announces. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

~v~

The sun is barely out when Naomi shows up for work in the morning. Most of the hospital is still, the last of the night shift heading out as she’s on her way in. She heads towards the residents’ lounge, wanting to put her things away before checking in on her patients and having a team meeting.

As soon as she opens her locker, she spots a gorgeous bouquet of red roses wrapped in newspaper invading the space. There’s no note attached to the bouquet, and she spared a quick glance around the room to see if anyone else is there. The lounge is empty, save for another resident in the corner, sleeping.

Naomi takes the bouquet out of her locker, careful not to smash the petals and holds it up to her nose, inhaling deeply.

Deciding to not put more thought into where they came from, Naomi simply cradles the bouquet in the crook of one of her arms, stuffs her bag into her locker, and continues on with her morning routine.

She’s passing by the nurses’ station on the 7th floor when someone catches her attention. “Oh Dr. Valentine! You have a special delivery.”

Her steps slow down as she approaches the front desk where Sarah, one of her favorite RNs is stationed. Sarah steps aside, revealing an even larger bouquet of roses, these ones white.

“Where did these come from?” Naomi asks.

“They were delivered about half an hour ago,” Sarah replies with a wink. “No note, though. I won’t let Dr. Ramsey know that you have a secret admirer.”

And that’s when it clicks into place. Memories of her fight with Ethan come flooding back, and it becomes clear that he’s the one gifting her these flowers. Before she even realizes she’s doing it, her eyes roll. If he thinks a couple of bouquets of roses are a good enough apology, he can think again.

Naomi plucks a white rose right from the center of the bouquet and hands it to Sarah. “For you.”

“Really? Are you sure?”

“I insist,” Naomi says. “Happy Friday, Sarah.”

“Thank you, Dr. Valentine!”

Seeing the smile on the senior nurse’s face is almost enough to cleanse Naomi of the annoyance she feels towards Ethan in this moment. After exchanging a few more pleasantries, Naomi manages to scoop up this new batch of flowers – they’re in a vase, to which she adds her red ones – and finishes her trek to the office.

She isn’t expecting it to be covered in bunches of bright yellow sunflowers.

Their communal desk is covered in them, along with Ethan’s personal desk and the couch. “What on earth was he thinking?”

“I was thinking that sunflowers are your favorite flower,” Ethan answers, and Naomi jumps, startled at his voice. She whips around and sees him standing in the doorway. “And so I got up well before the sun was shining, went to the Boston Flower Exchange and bought every single one I could get my hands on.”

“And the roses?”

“White is supposed to be symbolic of new beginnings and forgiveness,” Ethan explains. “And you simply can’t go wrong with red.”

“If you think buying me flowers is going to cut it, you must not know me well,” Naomi says. Him buying her things doesn’t impress her, no matter how much she jokes about his money.

“No, but I figured it couldn’t hurt.” Ethan takes a cautious step into the room, shutting the door behind him. A sleepless night without her beside him forced Ethan to do a lot of thinking about how he wanted this conversation to go. A peace offering is always a good start. “And it got you to talk to me.”

Naomi scoffs and sets her flowers down. “Barely.”

“I’m sorry,” Ethan says. “I’m an idiot, and an asshole.”

“It’s good that we can agree on something.”

Okay, it’s clear that she is not going to give him any leeway. “You were absolutely right to call me out on my behavior towards you.”

“Why did you do it?” Naomi asks.

“I wasn’t thinking,” Ethan says simply. “I got so caught up in having Harper on the team, and it’s easy to slip back into old habits without even realizing.”

“It wasn’t a simple one time thing. It was more than once that you and Harper completely forgot I was even there. And I like Harper, I don’t think I could respect her more than I already do, and I have a very healthy sense of self esteem, but even the toughest person on earth wouldn’t like being in my shoes, on the outside looking in while you and your ex reminisce on old dates and inside stories. Ethan, you couldn’t handle a modicum of the shit I have willingly put up with in order to be with you.”

His stomach knots up at the thought of an ex-boyfriend of Naomi’s coming into his personal space, sharing personal jokes with her, ignoring him, and monopolizing her time. If the thought of it had him this twisted, he can’t believe he’s been putting her through that reality.

“You were right to call me out on my bad communication skills. I am terrible at relationships. I’m not using it as an excuse, it’s just the truth. But I’ve gotten complacent, which is unacceptable.” Ethan takes another step towards Naomi, and when she doesn’t instantly recoil, he takes it as a sign to get even closer. “The last thing I ever want to do is stifle your voice, or make you feel invisible. Naomi, you are...invaluable. To this hospital, to this team, to me, and I am so sorry that there was ever a time where I made you feel like you weren’t. You are the most important person in my life, and what we have is something I’ve never had with anyone else.”

“Okay, so start acting like it,” Naomi challenges. “I’m your equal and I demand every bit of respect you have to offer. Anything less than that cannot be tolerated anymore, personally or professionally.”

Ethan nods emphatically at her words. “Of course.”

“I mean it.”

“You have my word, Naomi. I’ll never let it happen again.” He closes the gap between them and cups her face in his hand. “Just please...never give me the silent treatment again. Yell from the rooftops, argue with me, I don’t care, but I can’t take not hearing your voice.”

“You needed to be taught a lesson,” Naomi says simply.

“I learned my lesson, and I hated it,” Ethan confesses, his lips dangerously close to hers. Naomi doesn’t budge, not even an inch. She’s terribly stubborn, even at the end of a fight. “It was torture.”

“Good.” Deciding to put him out of his misery, Naomi tilts her head up and captures Ethan in a kiss. He doesn’t waste a single second returning it. His free hand wraps around the small of her back, pulling her in closer. How did he go this long without touching her?

He doesn’t know how long they’ve been kissing, but he finally breaks apart from her long enough to bury his face in her neck, allowing her scent and soft skin to soothe any of his fraught nerves. She smells like home.

“Does this mean I’m forgiven?” Ethan asks.

“The jury is still out on that one.”

“You’re going to make me work for this, aren’t you?”

“Are you up for the challenge?”

Ethan untangles himself from their embrace and takes a step back, so he’s able to look Naomi in the eyes. He takes her hand and presses a soft kiss into her palm. “For you? I’ll do just about anything.”

~v~

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#playchoices #choices: stories you play #open heart #ethan ramsey #dr. ethan ramsey #ethan x mc

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mm2305 · 4 years ago

Text

All That Matters

Characters/pairings : Ethan Ramsey & Olivia Valentine

Words/Genre : 2.8 K / Angst , Romance

Warnings : mentions of death,injuries

Summary : Olivia gets seriously injured. How does Ethan react?

A/N : Hello again! This fic was written per @groovypalacehorselover ‘s request. This is the first time I’m attempting to write angst , so I hope this comes out good enough. A big THANK YOU to @romewritingshop for her help in editing this. Moodboard inspired by @potionsprefect 's ones.

Disclaimer : all characters and pictures belong to the rightful owners

My Masterlist

Enjoy!

------------------------------

Ethan was frantically rushing through the hospital corridors. Dread and anxiety flooded his mind that he could barely breathe. There was no way he would allow it to stall him. Pushing himself to go as fast as he could to get to the farthest wing of the hospital, he slammed the double doors ahead open.A group of interns were nattering amongst themselves,oblivious to the frantic attending approaching them. A thundering voice broke them out of their trance.

"OUT OF MY WAY!", he boomed at them, as he was approaching closer.

The interns, startled by him, broke apart allowing him to pass through them. What made them wonder though, was the clear, unadulterated emotion in his eyes. He looked as though his world was slowly crumbling around him. And they weren't wrong.

2 Hours Earlier

Olivia was finishing up her rounds for the day. In a few hours she’d be home, snuggled with her favorite throw blanket, watching a movie on Netflix while Ethan would complain incessantly about her taste in movies. She had to visit her last patient, a sweet seven year old boy named Nathan.

His diagnosis was a difficult case to solve and this made young Nathan restless. His mom came to stay with him in the evening but she had to go to work early in the morning. The poor boy was often bored out of his mind, taking adventurous strolls through the hospital, without telling anyone. There were several instances that she and a few nurses had to track him down, but still Nathan continued doing that. She couldn’t really blame the poor kid. Today was just one of those days.

Olivia walked to the nurses' desk, to ask about Nathan.

"Hello Sarah, did you happen to see Nathan? I think he snuck out of his room again."

"Dr Valentine! No, I haven't. Maybe you should ask Mary. She might have an idea where Nathan is.", The nurse replied with a soft smile.

"Okay, thank you!"

She left the reception in search of Mary. Before long, she found her in one of the halls.

"Hi Mary, I was wondering if you've seen Nathan?", She inquired politely.

"Dr Valentine! I was just looking for you. I think I saw the kid heading towards the halls leading to the new wing."

"The new wing? Isn't that under construction?", Olivia asked, an audible tremor in her voice.

"Yes?"

"Oh God! Come on! We need to find him now!", she said, a feeling of worry and dread filling her. The new wing Bloom designed was essentially a plan to enlarge the facilities available for research. From what she heard, it wasn't safe to roam around the place without any safety gear. It was too dangerous to go there, especially for a young boy like Nathan, but she won’t let him fall to harm.

After a few minutes of darting around and asking everyone they encountered, Mary and Olivia got the same response. They saw a kid among these halls at some point. By the time they reached the site, Olivia and Mary began calling for him.

"Nathan? Are you here?"

"Nathan? Nathan come here, it's me, Dr Olivia"

No answer. Either he wasn't here or he just couldn't hear them clearly. The two women began to slow down their pacing steps as they carefully tread through the congested building site, all while calling for the young boy.

"Dr Oliv?", They heard a small shaky voice calling.

Olivia knew it was him and rushed towards the direction of the voice. Mary, hot on her heels, noticed him first.

"He's there!", She exclaimed, running to his side and checking over him for any injuries.

Olivia began walking towards them, relieved that Nathan was okay,when she heard a cracking noise. She quickly realized that the wall, they were close to, was about to collapse! With a sudden burst of adrenaline, she rushed towards them and pushed them away from the wall. She smiled softly at them before she heard a bigger *crack* and everything went black.

-----------------------------------

MEANWHILE

Ethan was sitting at his computer, in his office, looking through files and updating the information onto his computer. Truth be told though, he was too distracted by a certain resident to concentrate on his current task.

Him and Olivia have been together for a little more than three months and he was happier than he had been in a long time. She really had the power to turn the worst of days better with just a smile.

She started coming to his house after work, in fact it’s almost like she had permanent residence in his heart and place. She spent most of the time there with him, just being together. Cooking, watching tv, playing ridiculous board games she always won. It was all very domestic and Ethan always felt his heart swell with love for her, at how at ease she felt being with him, in the place he now considered a home.

Glancing at the clock, he realised their shifts would end soon but he was too impatient. With a soft sigh, he turned off his computer and walked out of his office ,towards the front desk.

"Good afternoon, have you seen Dr. Valentine?", he asked a nurse he knew she frequently talked to.

"Dr. Ramsey! Yes, she was here a little while ago, she was looking for her young patient, Nathan. He has a habit of sneaking out of his room, you see - Wait a minute please!", she paused to answer the phone.

"Bloom Edenbrook Hospital how can I help you? Mary? What?! I’m sending the team right away!"

The woman, Sarah, turned to Ethan with a flurry of panic coursing in her eyes.

"Dr Ramsey, it was the nurse who was with Dr Valentine. They found the boy at the construction site! When they reached for him… a nearby wall collapsed on them!"

"What!? Oh my… No no no… Wh-What else did she tell you? Tell me!", he demanded, his eyes glossed with panic, the usual pink hue of his face drained as he turned as white as a sheet, his breathing in short stuttered gasps.

"Olivia ... was hit worst." Sarah whispered on the verge of tears.

"Page Mirani, Delarosa and the best nurses this damn hospital has! Understood! I'm going there now!"

Before she had a chance to reply, he was already off in search of his Olivia.

-----------------------

PRESENT TIME

Ethan continued running through the maze of corridors, his eyes full of unshed tears.

"Not her, please not her! Don't take her from me! Please!", Ethan wasn't by any means a religious man, but the fear of losing the woman he loved made him pray to whoever could hear his agonized thoughts. The one person on this earth for whom he would give anything for, was again in grave danger. Memories from the last time she was at the brink of death flooded his mind, knocking the breath out of his lungs. How fragile she looked and to know he couldn't do anything to save her, other than watch her become progressively weaker and her radiant smile, the one that could lighten up a whole room, fade away. "No, don't do this right now Ethan. Focus on her. Only her.", he thought, nodding to himself while pushing the last hurdle of doors open. His eyes quickly scanned the room, trying to locate her.

He finally saw her.

She was lying on the floor pieces of rubble around her. She was unconscious, her eyes closed, her golden hair around her face. As he rushed to her side, whilst avoiding the scattered materials, he saw a small patch of blood on the side of her head.

He knelt beside her, being careful not to move her, in fear of causing more damage to her body. He took her small, still warm, hand in his and softly began to stroke her cheek and hair.

"Darling? Olivia? It's me, Ethan. Please Olivia, can you hear me?", his voice wavered at the sight of her blood on his fingers from stroking her hair and a few tears were finally breaking through.

Her eyes fluttered as a soft little gasp left her lips.

"E-Ethan?", she whispered, her voice hoarse and barely audible.

"Yes, Love it's me."

"I… it hurts.. I can't…", she croaked but it was too difficult for her to breathe properly, the dust hovering in the air wasn'tmaking this any easier. Ethan noticed this and pushed her head slightly back, to allow her to breathe better.

"Shh darling I know… I'm here love, I'm not going anywhere...Please sweetheart don't give up on me… please…I can't lose you", Ethan whispered, stroking her cheek softly, trying to be strong for her.

Olivia fell unconscious once again, her chest taking short ragged breaths. He pried his eyes away from her to look around the room. A woman was in the corner with a crying child in her arms, trying to comfort him.

" Hi… Are you okay? Did you get hurt?" he asked them as he approached them.

"Nothing too bad. Might just be a sprained wrist and a couple of scratches. Nathan’s fine too, just shocked. Dr. Valentine…. she … she got the worst of it.", she replied with tears in her eyes.

Ethan didn't have a chance to reply as the team arrived. They immediately got down to work, not even hesitating to lose a minute, paying Ethan no attention.

"Get her on the gurney carefully! One mistake and you're fired!" Zaid commanded, with a fiery stern voice at the team of nurses.

"Zaid, she's got a cut on the side of her head and she's bleeding. I don't see anything too serious but we should order a scan. Shortness of breath indicates one or two fractured ribs and her left ulna and radius might be broken, given the swelling.", Ines said with evident concern and fear thick in her voice.

"Let's get some scans and see exactly what's going on", Zaid replied, trying to be as calm as possible, in this case. Olivia was his colleague,but more importantly she was his friend and he wouldn't allow anything to happen to her. Not on his watch.

"I'm coming with you!", Ethan interrupted their conversation.

"You're not in the right state of mind to help her now!"

"Zaid’s right about this. She needs you to be calm and focused when she wakes up.", Ines told him resting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

Ethan had no choice but to reluctantly agree.

--------------------------------------

Several hours later, Ethan was pacing anxiously in front of the room Olivia was checked into. The night doctors were there checking on her. As soon as they heard what happened, her friends joined Ethan in the waiting room, to hear news about her condition. Sienna when she saw her best friend in that state, immediately broke down, Aurora and Elijah trying to comfort her. Bryce, Rafael and Jackie, were mostly silent, their minds running through endless scenarios of what could happen to the most courageous woman they knew.

She had a broken hand, three broken ribs; one of which was pressing too close to her lung; causing her difficulty in breathing smoothly. This required a minor surgery, which was conducted by Harper herself. She wouldn't let anyone else touch the woman she had come to consider a friend. Her head injury, thankfully, wasn't too bad, but there was a possibility of a mild concussion. The whole hospital was there to help Olivia in whatever way she needed. From nurses to interns to anyone she had always been kind to.

Now, Ethan was waiting outside of her room alone, because her friends left a few minutes ago. She wouldn't wake up for a few hours and they made sure she would be completely okay before they left. Besides, they knew that Ethan wouldn't leave her side. That is, once he got to finally see her.

Thirty agonizing minutes later, he was finally allowed to go into her room. His eyes glided across her small form on the hospital bed. The side of her head was wrapped in white gauze, because of the injury there. Her left arm was in a cast and placed on a pillow to make her more comfortable. She was hooked to an IV, her body seeming too delicate on the hospital bed. Her face was in a serene slumber, her body was still under the influence of the drugs she was given during and after her surgery.

Ethan took her soft hand in his, kissing her knuckles and looking tearfully at her.

"My love… You scared me so so much… When that nurse told me you were hurt… I thought I was going to lose you. Again.", He started talking to her, even though she couldn't hear him, he was baring his heart to her. Letting the tears he was holding on to fall.

"Finding you there, lying unconscious… was unbearable. Knowing that you may be gone forever, never being able to touch you, or see your beautiful smile, hear your awful jokes again… I’ve never believed in a higher power, but if there is a being that saved you, then I am grateful. Because, without you, none of this matters. You're my whole world Oliv. And this world means nothing to me if you’re not here darling", he finished , laying a soft kiss on her lips.

He stayed with her for a few hours, having no intention of leaving her, but Naveen forced him to go get a coffee and something to eat. Of course, Naveen promised he would stay there with her while Ethan was away.

On his way back to her room, he encountered Leland Bloom. "Great, just who I wanted to see", Ethan thought, resisting the urge to roll his eyes.

"Ah Dr. Ramsey. I was just coming to find you. How is Dr. Valentine?", he asked with a facade of interest.

"She’s in her room resting. Still unconscious though, because of the anesthesia from her surgery. Now if you'll excuse me", Ethan curtly replied, walking past Leland, anxious to return to her room.

"I was hoping to come with you, actually. I wanted to ask you, will she make a full recovery?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but yes, in a couple months she will probably be alright.", Ethan gritted his teeth, retraining his seething anger at how intrusive this man could be.

"Probably? You're not certain? If her recovery takes so long, then she will be left behind in the hospital's advances. Pity… she was actually going to be one of the key assets to the progression of the hospital's success.", Leland said, not having noticed or probably caring about Ethan's expression.

Ethan couldn't believe what he was hearing. The way he spoke of Olivia. His Olivia. A human being, as though she was nothing but a tool to be used. He clenched his fists, blood coursing through his veins, ears ringing, face and neck flushed red with anger, trying to resist the immense urge to punch him square in his arrogant face.

"How DARE you talk that way about a human being who was seriously hurt? She could have been fucking killed and all you have to say is that she would be an asset to the success of the hospital? What kind of person are you, really? Do you see anything beyond your own selfish, moronic advancements?", Ethan turned to him abruptly, almost roaring, all the pent up emotions escaping him in this outburst towards this man.

Leland was stunned at his outburst, mouth gaping open for a second before he recollected himself. The two of them had become the center of attention as the nurses and doctors were forming a small circle, staring at the two men.

"I would best advise you against speaking to me like that Dr. Ramsey. I'm the one who is in charge here and I expect you to treat me with respect. Now, I understand you are under pressure right now since your partner was hurt, so I'm willing to look past this little tantrum. See you soon, Dr Ramsey." he replied, walking away from Ethan, who was stalking his way down the corridor to Olivia’s room, unbothered by Bloom’s words.

The only person in this world whose words mattered, laid in a hospital bed right now, and he vowed he would not spend any more precious time away from her. Because despite what life throws at them, all that matters is that his Rookie ... his Olivia ... his true love will be alright. They will be alright. Together.

-----------------------------

Thank you for reading !!!

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ladyblogger-margie · 4 years ago

Text

A Simple Mistake

Pairing: Sam Wilson x Bucky Barnes (MCU)

Summary: Sam Wilson skips a dinner date with Bucky, not realizing the significance of the date, much to Bucky’s amusement.

Warnings: None! Just fluff

Word Count: 972

Prompt: “How could you miss your own birthday?”

a/n: I’m aware I missed posting something for Sam’s birthday on the 14th, so this will hopefully make up for that. This and the following 6 day are all very birthday centric stories as we get closer to my actual birthday and the end of my birthday challenge.

MY MASTERLIST

Sam Wilson slumped to the couch in his living room, alone in the dark. He was too exhausted to even turn on a light. He felt the aches in his body ease slightly now that he was finally off his feet, and he relished in the high that release gave him, moaning slightly into the dark.

He put his feet up on his coffee table - a terrible habit he had inherited from Bucky - and pulled out his phone. He had several texts from Bucky he had left unanswered and even a missed call. Though Sam wasn’t worried because they had a code to signal when things were an actual emergency and Sam should show up immediately in full tactical gear.

These texts were just general check ins, though Sam was curious as to why there were so many. Then he remembered, Bucky had made dinner reservations for them for that evening and Sam hadn’t confirmed today he’d be home in time from his mission in San Francisco helping Scott.

Sam put his phone on speaker and settled deeper into the couch.

“Where are you?” Bucky asked, his voice soft but clearly holding back frustrations.

“I’m sorry, I’m just not going to make it out tonight. You understand, right?” Sam said. He knew his voice sounded tired and he hoped Bucky didn’t take things personally.

“Are you sure? We could just go for an appetizer and a beer?” Bucky said in a pleading tone, “I’m sure you need to eat after your trip.”

Sam sighed, spending an evening with his boyfriend would be great - he always slept better when Bucky was in his bed - but he really didn’t feel up for being back out in public.

“I’m sorry, I am just too wiped out,” Sam said, “You can come over if you want, but I’ll probably be asleep by the time you get here anyway, so you should still go and eat, maybe Sharon’s around to go with you?”

There was a deadly silence on the other end of the line as Sam waited for an answer.

“Do you know what day it is?” Bucky asked him.

“Uh, Wednesday, I think?” Sam replied, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Bucky grunted on the other end, “Are you sure there’s no way you’re coming?”

Sam sighed, “I’m just not up for it.”

“Okay. I love you,” Bucky said in a tone of defeat.

“Love you too. See you tomorrow?” Sam finished hopefully

“Tomorrow,” Bucky said as Sam yawned loudly.

Then Sam hung up the phone and immediately fell asleep where he sat.

The next morning, at the crack of dawn Sam noticed, he was startled awake by a very loud bangnig on his front door. It was the unmistakable sound of vibranium against wood and Sam was both annoyed and touched at the enthusiasm of his boyfriend’s early morning visit. He cracked his neck as he got off the couch, regretting sleeping on the couch all night.

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Sam shouted at the door.

He opened the door for Bucky who was leaning on the doorframe with a sultry smirk.

“Oh yes, you’ll be coming, that’s for sure,” Bucky said causing Sam to choke on a laugh.

“It’s 7am,” Sam said.

“You’re point?” Bucky said, cutting Sam’s rely off with a deep kiss. He pushed Sam backwards into his house, his hands on Sam’s hips, the perfect balance of hot and cold thanks to Bucky’s sweaty palm on one side and the vibranium one on the other.

“You have terrible breath,” Bucky said with a laugh.

“You love it,” Sam teased.

“I love you,” Bucky said, “There’s a difference.”

Sam led Bucky to the couch and pulled him into his lap. He tucked a strand of hair behind Bucky’s ear and took his time doing so - he liked Bucky with his hair longer.

“What are you doing here so early?” Sam asked, “I’m happy to see you and all, but still.”

“I feel like I have to make up for last night,” Bucky explained, “I should have planned something better knowing you’d just finished up in San Fran.”

Sam chuckled, “It’s fine, it’s one dinner, I’m sure we’ll have more.”

Bucky cocked his head and watched Sam intently, “Just a dinner?”

“Oh shit, did I forget an anniversary or something?” Sam said, confused.

“How could you miss your own birthday?” Bucky said, “Not just miss it, but forget it all together!”

Sam’s eyes went wide with realization, “My birthday.”

“Yes, your birthday,” Bucky said, shaking his head, “I had a whole surprise party planned. I even flew Sarah into town. She’s pissed by the way.”

Sam buried his head in Bucky’s chest, “I am an idiot.”

“Yes you are,” Bucky said, holding Sam’s face in his hands and forcing him to look up at him, “But you’re my idiot.”

Then Bucky kissed Sam so deeply Sam forgot his own name along with his birthday. They stayed there on the couch, kissing deeply, and thoroughly until they were interrupted by Sarah walking in the front door.

“Sam!” she called from the front, announcing her presence.

“In here!” Sam called back and Bucky slipped off his lap.

Sarah entered with a large sheet cake in her hands.

“Let’s blow out these candles quickly, I wanna eat it,” she said, dropping it forcefully yet precisely on the small coffee table. “I was promised a fun weekend out without any kids and surrounded by sexy Avengers, but I guess breakfast cake with you two will have to do.”

Bucky and Sam both laughed and Bucky left to grab a lighter and some forks from the kitchen as Sarah popped some candles on top.

It wasn’t the flashiest of birthdays, and it was a whole day late, but Sam doesn’t think he’s ever had a better birthday.

Birthday Challenge Masterlist

Tags: @autumnleaves1991-blog

#sambucky #sam wilson x bucky barnes #winterfalcon #tfatws #anthony mackie #sebastian stan #sam wilson #bucky barnes #the winter soldier #the falcon #the falcon and the winter soldier #birthday challenge

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drariellevalentine · 4 years ago

Text

Medically Inevitable

Chapter 10- Puzzling Pathways

Characters:- Ethan Ramsey, Arielle Valentine, Alyssa Raines, Arabelle Raines, Naveen Banerji, Sienna Trinh, Elijah Greene, Jackie Varma, Landry Olsen, Harper Emery

Pairing:- Ethan Ramsey x Arielle Valentine

Warnings:- Swearing

Arielle’s PoV:-

You wake up quite early with a throbbing head and roll out of bed, making sure not to wake up Belle and Aly. The sun hasn’t risen yet, so you assume it’s around 4. After your morning routine, you pick up Naveen’s latest test reports with a cup of tea and head over to your balcony. Going through it, you can’t find much that catches your eye. You head back inside after an hour and find the duo awake.

“Good morning...”, Belle greets you accompanied with a yawn.

“I thought you were sleeping. I’ll head straight to Flair’s HQ and get ready there with Belle. Our flight ’s at 9pm.”, Aly replies while heading towards the bathroom.

“Hey Belle, are you ready to see daddy again?”, you ask.

“Mhm, can’t wait. I'm going to tell him all about yesterday, it was so much fun.”

“Oh really? What happened yesterday?”, you ask. She launches into a story about how they went to the library and then made pizza for dinner.

“I was going to ask for dessert but I fell asleep. I woke up and saw you sleeping by me. Mommy told me that you brought me here.”, she says with a sheepish grin.

“Well I’m sure you can eat all the ice cream you want when you fly home. Tell daddy to call me, okay?”

“I will!” Aly comes out of the restroom, completely ready.

“Belle, come on. We need to get ready and so does Aunt Arielle.”

“Okay! I’ll be quick!” Aly helps Belle get ready while you decide to make lunch for you and Naveen. You head outside the room to find Jackie and Sienna entering the apartment.

“Good morning Ari! Ines and Kyra just left. I thought you were asleep so I didn’t wake you.”, Si says.

“You both have noon shifts, right? Lucky!”, you reply.

“Yeah, we’ll be nursing our headaches if you need us.”, and with that they both head inside. Opening the fridge, you grab all the ingredients needed for Naveen’s chicken wrap. You get to work, starting with grilling the chicken with a bunch of spices, meanwhile julienning some greens and veggies. After shredding the chicken, you cook the tortillas and layer the fillings, topping them off with dressing and finally wrapping them up. You’re just finished packing the wraps in a container when Aly and Belle come out of your room.

“Alright Belle, it’s time to go. Go say goodbye to everyone.” You point Belle towards Si’s room, she comes out a few minutes later, candy bar in hand.

“Look at what they gave me!”, she shouts with joy leaving both of you to chuckle. She puts the candy bar in her backpack and wraps you up in a hug, or rather your legs. “Bye!...I’ll miss you! When will you come to visit?!”, she asks as you lift her up into your arms and hug her goodbye.

“Maybe during Christmas, okay? Be safe and a good girl!”

“Tell Uncle Ethan and grandpa that I’m leaving!”, She says handing you a few York candies as you lead them to the door. “Bye Arielle, we had a nice time.”, Aly says as she hugs you.

“I did too.” You reluctantly wave them goodbye as they head towards their Über, Belle shouting one last goodbye. “Okay Arielle, time for work.”

A little while later, you’re heading to the nurses’ station after rounds when you see a small crowd near one of the OR’s. Overhearing one of the resident surgeons congratulating Bryce, you head over after the crowd disperses.

“Hey, looks like someone made a good impression!”, you say.

“There was a complication with the surgery and the general surgeon was taking too long to arrive. So I stepped up and performed the procedure, meanwhile scoring a free solo surgery.”, he replies with a smirk.

“Nice! Although I don’t think your friends are happy about that.”, you reply noticing the scowls on the other interns’ faces.

“I came here to be the best surgeon, and right now Dr. Tanaka thinks I’m one of the best.”, he replies.

You smile, “You’re right”-

“Valentine, enough chitchat. Head to the ER.” You whirl around to see Zaid with a scowl on his face.

“Yes, Dr. Mirani!” You shoot Bryce an apologetic look as you head to the ER.

As you enter the E.R. Sarah directs you to the bed of your patient. You find a young woman sitting on the bed along with a guy near her age sitting beside her with a worried expression. As you near them the boy gets up from his seat and to shake hands with you.

"Hi doctor!" He smiles as he shakes your hand enthusiastically.

"Wow, hi and hello," you smile back at both of them and then pick up her chart.

"Willow?" You read out the name.

"That's me, and this is my twin brother, Rowan," she points where the boy is standing.

"Willow and Rowan? Aren't those both-"

"Trees. Yeah. Our parents are uh...outdoorsy type-"

"You can tell the nice doctor, Rowan. She’s a total hippie."

You smile at the twins banter. "What about you too? Have you followed their footsteps?"

Willow grins, "Well I'd say we are... hippie-like."

"We like the environment and all but we also like indoor plumbing," Rowan adds.

"Sounds like a compromise I could get on board with.”, you reply chuckling. Willow laughs.

"How long have you been feeling itchy, Willow?", you ask when noticing her continuously itching her skin.

"Uh...mmm...I’m not sure?" She says nervously.

"She‘s had it for a few weeks now, I guess," Rowan answers.

Nodding, you move closerand notice the darkened spider angiomas under her skin. You take a closer and better look at her eyes to find it jaundiced.

"You haven't had it checked out?" You ask, looking for more symptoms.

"Well, I took her to Mass Kenmore the other day but-" he never gets to finish the sentence as Willow cuts him off.

"But the doctor was a jerk. My friend says the doctors here are much more nice."

Willow's voice is filled with nervousness. But you don’t consider it much thinking it's probably because of her sickness.

"Smart friends," you try to lighten the mood. "Willow, I am going to have to listen to your belly. Lie back." You help her lie down.

"Push your hand on your sides," you order and she does so. "Yeah just like this. Now I'm going to give you a little tap."

You lightly strike one side of Willow's abdomen resting your hand on the other side.

"What are you doing?" Rowan asks both confused and concerned.

"That was fluid wave test for ascites. Fluid buildup in the abdominal cavity," you answer his question.

"What did the doctors at Mass Kenmore say?" You ask after noting the symptoms. Willow and Rowan share a nervous glance.

"He, uh... didn't spend that long with me. He said it's probably the...flu," Willow stammers.

"The flu?" You ask shocked. What doctor in their right mind would diagnose a patient with these symptoms as a flu!

"Yeah? He was kinda sketchy," Rowan trails off.

"He was very sketchy. Just because my chest hurts doesn't mean you have to do the whole consultation with my boobs, right?" Willow lets out a nervous chuckle. Their behavior is suspicious but you decide not to jump to conclusions.

"Okay. What did he prescribe?", you ask.

"Just some antibiotics."

"Antibiotics? But influenza is a virus," you get more concerned now. Was he even a doctor? First he misdiagnosed a simple disease and then he prescribed antibiotics for flu!

"Uh...yeah. So dumb right. He was so...old," Willow tries to laugh it off.

"He was so old, he looked like Yoda," Rowan tries to joke.

"But a mean. A mean Yoda,"Willow adds.

"Okay, but Willow I'm afraid it's not the flu,"you say. "It's likely Hepatitis C."

"Hep C?" Willow asks, her voice tracing fear.

"It sounds scary but it's now curable in a matter of weeks," you try to comfort her.

"That umm...sounds expensive," Rowan says nervously.

"Uhm, yes, Hep C treatment is notoriously costly," you say sadly.

"How costly are we talking?" Willow asks.

"The list cost is $28,000 per month. And we are talking about three months of supply,", you answer.

"It's a lot but it's important for you to get treated," You add, "Hep C causes huge damage to your liver. It can cause total organ failure, even can lead to cancer. It can kill you."

"But how are we supposed to pay for it?" Willow's voice is sad.

"Your insurance can help. Wait a minute, let me take your information,"You say and reach for the paper to note the details down.

"Our insurance info. Uhm...we...gave it to the hospital staff when we got here. Right, Ro?" Willow trails off nervously.

"Yeah, right…" Rowan agrees.

Their behavior looks suspicious to you and suddenly it all clicks into place.

"Wait, you guys don't have insurance, do you?”, you tentatively ask.

The twins look at each other helplessly. "...No. We don't," Rowan says after a brief moment of silence.

"Usually when I’m sick, I just hope for it to go away. But this time the symptoms are getting worse," Willow states.

"Mass Kenmore wouldn't even look at Willow without insurance," Rowan adds.

"And we definitely can't afford 28 grand a month," Willow states.

"Yeah, I know. It's total bull. Believe me it makes my gut churn when I have to tell patients they can't afford what they need to survive.", you reply with anger.

"But what can we do about it?" Willow sighs.

"I am not sure…" you try to think of a way to help them.

"Please doctor. I'll do whatever I can to help Willow but I don't earn much either. Our parents don't have any savings. They don't even believe in modern medicine," Rowan says angrily.

"I told my mom I was sick and she said to sleep with an amethyst on my chest," Willow adds.

"We're already in debt from college.This bill will ruin us. Isn't there anything for me to do. Could I work it off somehow?" Rowan asks.

"It's not a restaurant, Ro. We can't do dishes or something. We'll just have to...go," Willow says sadly and gets down the bed.

"But you heard what Dr. Valentine said could happen," Rowan says concerned.

Willow get up to leave.

"Wait, don't go yet. I'll see what I can do," you stop her.

"You'll help us?" Rowan smiles hopefully.

"I can't promise anything. But I'll try," you say sincerely.

"Thank you Dr.Valentine," Willow smiles and for the first time the smile seems genuine.

You reply back with a smile,"First things first. We can't treat Hep C without knowing it's genotype. So I'll need to draw blood sample."

After admitting Willow, you’re trying to think of a way to get the vial to lab. But you know the you can't hand it over to the pathology lab without a resident's signature. And you'd need to do it without anyone asking questions. That's when you see Ines. "The just person for the work," you think and walk towards her pleading for the best. "Hi Arielle. All done in the E.R.?" she asks as you approach.

"Yeah. I was actually looking for you!" You try to smile but your nervousness gets in between.

But she doesn't really seem to notice the hesitation."At you service. What do you need?",She asks smiling. You hesitate for a moment. Weighing your options you decide on telling her the truth, even though it might have risks.

"My patient has Hep C. And I need to run a blood test for further treatment but…" You pause not sure how to say,"but they don't have any insurance."

Ines understands what you are saying and her face falls slightly.

"Oh…"she says after a moment of silence.

"I admitted her. But she can't afford to be here, let alone treatment. She wanted to leave," you state sadly.

"Then I'm afraid you'll have to let her."

"But…" you stop not knowing what to say. You thought that out of all people maybe Ines would understand and help you.

"One of the hardest thing is to learn you can't help everyone. As a doctor your responsibility is to help the people you can help." She puts a comforting hand on your shoulder before walking away. You lean against the nearest wall as a wave of disappoinment washes over you. Later, you head towards the cafeteria for a quick break and then a few more post-op check-in’s.

After checking on one of your post-op patients, you carefully sneak around the construction site and enter Naveen’s room, lunch in hand.

“Sunshine! What a lovely surprise!”

“Hi dad, I brought lunch. Belle and Aly went back to Flair. Their flight’s at 9.”

“Belle was a nice surprise yesterday. You know, I think she managed to make Ethan like her.”, he replies.

“Yeah, she told me all about how she went to the library and Uncle Ethan read her a bunch of stories.”, you say as you draw blood for another test. Filling the vial with blood, you dispose of the needle and wash your hands.

“So, what have you made for lunch?”

“Your special chicken wraps.”, you reply with a smile as you hand one to him. You both take a bite. “So? How is it? Does it resemble yours at least a little?”

“It’s quite close, but the seasoning is slightly off.”

You roll your eyes. “That’s because it’s your recipe! And no one can perfectly make your recipes!”, you exclaim.

“She’s right Naveen. Your recipes are quite tricky to master.” You turn around to find Ethan standing in the doorway.

“Dr. Ramsey. I looked over the files but I couldn’t find much. The blood sample I drew is over there, I think we should try again but maybe..”, you discuss with him about the next steps.

“Ethan. Arielle.” Both of you turn to him. “Will you let a man eat in peace?! Both of you, eat and then discuss whatever you need to.”

“Fine.” You hand a wrap to Ethan.

“Have one, I made a lot more than I can eat.” He tentatively takes one and takes a bite.

“It’s quite good.”

“Thank you. I almost forgot, Belle asked me to tell you that she was leaving tonight and asked me to give these to you.” You hand out the minty chocolate treats to both of them, popping one in your mouth. “Seems like you made quite a good impression on Belle, she likes you a lot.”

“I’m convinced that Ethan likes her more than me! You should have seen him yesterday!”, Naveen exclaims as Ethan groans. Your pager beeps with the results of one of your patient’s tests. Sighing, you pop the last piece in your mouth and close the empty box.

“I have to go, I’ll see you later.”, you say as you kiss him on the cheek and gather your stuff. “Oh and Dr. Ramsey, I didn’t find anything much but I think this might be a small lead.”, you say pointing to the sample and highlighted part of the report. He nods as you exit the room.

After discussing a treatment plan with one of your patients, you’re heading towards the locker room to wrap up your shift early, when your phone chimes. It’s Bryce.

After responding, you change into a pair of jeans and a spaghetti strap top and grab your stuff from the locker. You head to the parking lot, and drive your way home. You unlock your door and find Si dressed up in a 30s theme. “Si! You look beautiful! That side twist is gorgeous! I didn’t know that people dressed up for this.”, you exclaim as you take off your heels.

“Well, I won’t be the only one! I got you a little something.” She rushes into her room and comes out holding a bag in her hand. “I picked out this ivory outfit for you, try it on!”, she exclaims as she hurriedly pushes you into your room to get dressed.

“Okay, okay! Give me a sec!” You pull out the beautiful outfit from the bag and lay it on your bed as you strip and carefully slip on the silky outfit. You tentatively open the door as Si gasps. “So...what do you think?”

“Oh my gosh! You look so pretty, all that’s missing is a matching hairstyle and jewellery. Quick, sit here! I’ll do your hair!” She quickly ushers you on your stool and starts to style your hair with the combs on your vanity. Pulling your hair into a side swept bun, she applies a coat of a pink shade on your lips and lastly helps you add matching accessories. You eye a pair of earrings that match Si’s dress.

“Here! Wear these!” She gasps.

“No way! They’re way too expensive, I can’t wear these!”, she counters.

“Oh shut up! You’re my best friend! You can wear whatever’s in my room.” You quickly trade her earrings and clasp yours on her as she looks in the mirror.

“Wow...these are really pretty.”

“Then keep them, they look much better on you.”, you reply.

“What, no! I can’t possibly”-

“Nope! I won’t take no for an answer.” She finally agrees and hugs you. You both look at yourselves at your floor length mirror for one last time. “Wait! One last touch!”, you say, carefully clasping on the necklace that Naveen gave you.

“Give me your phone! This is a perfect opportunity for a photo op.” She leads to a luminous corner in your room and snaps a pic as you do the same for her.

“These came out amazing! I’m posting mine, then we’ll leave.” You both take a few minutes to post your pictures. Just as you’re about to leave, Si’s phone chimes. She picks up the phone and replies, hiding the screen from you. “Hey, you can go without me. I’ll be there a bit later.”, she says.

“Okay…”, you bid goodbye and leave the apartment. You’re strolling down the sidewalk towards Boston Common, eyes sweeping through the crowd for any sign of your friends when finally you spot them.

“Damn, you look even classier in person!”, Bryce says patting the spot next to him. You place your things nearby and squeeze in by Bryce.

“Where’s Sienna? She said she was waiting for you.”, Elijah asks.

“I don’t know.”, you respond. “Just as we were about to leave, she got a text and said she’ll come by a little later.” Just then, you hear a familiar voice greet Elijah.

“Hey.” You all turn around to see Phoebe.

“Ohh...this guy’s got it baaaad…”, Jackie says, noticing the blush on Elijah’s cheeks.

“Shut up!”, you whisper to Jackie.

“Hey Phoebe. You came.”, Elijah spits out, not knowing what to say.

“Yeah...I said I would make it.”, Phoebe replies equally as awkward. You wince at the awkwardness and decide to play the role of Cupid once again.

“Phoebe! I’m glad you made it. Come sit here!”, you say gesturing to the comfy space by Elijah as he mouths a thank you. The pair sit together and click by talking about Star Trek, leaving you, Bryce and Jackie waiting for the screening. You’re about to ask Bryce when the movie starts when a smell of buttery goodness wafts towards you. All three of you turn around to find Sienna and Danny holding a small picnic basket. “Ohh...so that’s what the text was about. Let’s see how she gets out of this.”, you think. “Hey Danny, Sienna didn’t tell us she invited you! Come on, join us!” You scoot over, leaving just enough room for the pair to sit together.

“Hey Arielle. I had an idea, so I went and picked up a few pastries from a nearby bakery.”, he replies with a slight blush on his face. “Ahhh! These two are so cute!”, you think. Sienna hands out the treats as the opening credits roll. You sink your front teeth into a chocolatey croissant. “Mmm...this is good! Great idea!”, you exclaim. All seven of you relax and watch the movie.

After a while, Landry perks up saying, “Hey Arielle, did you find anything on Patient X?”

“Oh yeah Ari! Did you find anything?”, Elijah asks.

You carefully mull over what to say. “Umm…I don’t know anything. “, you say.

“Bullshit!”, says Jackie.

Thankfully, Si comes to your defence. “She’s serious! Zaid was chewing her out today for asking a bunch of questions.” Jackie rolls her eyes as everyone shifts their attention back to the movie. You mouth a thank you to Sienna and watch the movie. A little while later, you and Elijah are getting some drinks for the gang.

“So, I noticed you were a little down when I saw you before lunch today. What happened?”, he asks. You sigh and explain Willow’s condition. His face hardens.

“Elijah?....Elijah?!”

He blinks and turns to you. “Oh sorry.”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, it’s alright.” You can clearly tell he’s lying.

“I’m not an idiot.”

He sighs, “It’s always that, don’t treat the condition or you’ll die; or treat the condition you you’ll be financially ruined.” You give him a look.

“...I was diagnosed with chronic spinal cord damage when I was 5. A surgeon came up with a solution to save my life, but it bankrupted my parents. They had to sell everything for my surgery. That’s why I wanted to become a doctor, you know? If it weren’t for that surgeon, I wouldn’t have been here right now. That’s what I wanted to do, find solutions for people who have nowhere to turn to.”, tears slowly trailing down his face.

Your heart wrenches. “I’m so sorry Elijah. And for what it’s worth, I know your parents would have made that decision over and over again for you.”

“I know. Do you know that there are government clinical trials for some patients?”, he asks.”

“Oh! I didn’t know that.” He doesn’t get any better.

“You are worth it, do you hear me? You are an amazing, wonderful and sweet person and whoever has gotten the pleasure to know you are blessed.”

He nods as he returns your hug. You buy the drinks and head back towards your friends.

Long into the movie, you’re completely bored and lost. “Does anybody know what’s going on?”, you ask.

“Well, Rosie’s supposed to hide out in Richard’s office until he leaves for the files of...or Wait I think it was...Oh forget it! I’m lost too!”, Landry exclaims. Your friends start talking, ignoring the movie as Bryce turns to you.

“So, you want to ditch this place?”

“I thought you were the one who said this would be ‘fun’!”, you counter.

“Hey! No point in making mistakes longer than you need to! Now, you coming or not?”, he asks.

You give him an incredulous look. “Where would we go? And I’m dressed like this!”

“We’ll go on an adventure. And maybe fashion you up some clothes meanwhile.”

“Okay, lead the way!” The two of you sneak away from the group and Bryce leads you to a mall. “Really? A mall? This is your definition of an ‘adventure’?”

“Well first, we need to get you some clothes. Second, who said a mall can’t be an adventure?! Just follow my lead!” You and Bryce enter the mall to find the mall mostly empty. “Okay, first you need an outfit change! So, does Miss Celebrity shop at stores like Forever 21 or only high-end brands?”, he teases you.

You roll your eyes. “I shop at Forever 21! And a bunch of other stores that aren’t high-end!”, you defend yourself.

“Okay then! First stop, picking out an outfit for you.”, he walks to the directory and scans the list for Forever 21. “Ah! There it is, second floor. Let’s go!” Both of you take the escalator up and enter the near empty store. “Now, I want you to sit here-“, he pats a bench near the dressing room, “While I go pick out an outfit for you.”

Before you can protest, he twirls around and heads into the women’s section. You decide to check your messages, seeing new texts from Si and Ethan and click on them.

You’re about to go look for Bryce when he appears out of nowhere. “Crap! You scared me!” He gives you a sheepish grin.

“Hehe, sorry about that. Now, go try this on and see if you need a different size.” He hands you the black bag and pushes you into one of the dressing rooms. You open it to find a lace black bralette with an olive green cover-up and jeans. “Hmm...not bad scalpel jockey.”

You slip on the outfit and open your door as Bryce lets out a low whistle.

“Looks like it fits perfectly.”, he replies.

“It does.” You quickly hand over the clothes to Bryce and give him your purse, but he doesn’t take your purse. He comes back in a few minutes and tosses the outfit through the top. “Hey! A little heads-up would be nice!” You slip on your new outfit and fold your other outfit into the bag. You head out of the dressing room and sit on a bench near Bryce, who’s texting someone.

“It’s Jackie. She wanted to know where we went.”, he says without looking up.

“I told Sienna though.”, you reply confused.

“Apparently, both pairs of lovebirds are grossing Jackie out.” You both laugh. “Just a sec, okay.” You nod and look at the nearby display of nail polish when you hear a click. Turing around, you see Bryce smiling and your phone chimes. Pulling out your phone, you see that Bryce took a picture of you and sent it to you.

“Hmm...who knew scalpel jockey had such photography skills?! I might post this.”, you tease him as you post it.

“So, does that make up for wasting your time?”, he asks.

“Maybe...depends on what adventure we’re going on next.”, you reply.

“Well, first we need fuel for our adventure. We’re getting some food!”, Bryce exclaims.

“You really know the way to a girl’s heart.” He flashes his signature grin and leads you to Chick-fil-A after paying for your outfit.

“How do you know I like Chick-fil-A?”, you ask.

“I don’t .”, he nonchalantly replies. He heads inside and orders two chicken burgers with a side of fries and an Oreo milkshake. You both take a seat in the booth after picking out your favourite sauces and water.

“I come here only for the mayo, and then stuff as many packets as I can in my pockets. It’s sooo good!”, you exclaim as he laughs.

“You remind me of my sister.”, he says.

“Careful Lahela, then I might come to the conclusion that you like me as a friend.”, you tease. He’s about to reply when the employee calls out your order. You get up but he doesn’t let you, and carries the tray full of goodness and carbs back to your table. “Such a gentleman.”, you say. Taking the burger from the tray, you unwrap it and take a bite (not before adding a little extra mayo, of course). “Ohmygod…”

“There’s nothing like comfort food.”, he says handing you a spoon for the Oreo milkshake.

“Yeah, comfort food becomes your best friend after a breakup.”, you say.

He raises an eyebrow. “And when was this?” He notices the hesitation on your face and places a hand on your shoulder, “Hey, it’s alright. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“No, it’s okay...he was my first love. We met at med school, he was in his second year of med school for neuroscience and it was my first for internal medicine. It was my first week, I was in Hopkins’ central library trying to reach for a book and managed to pull down the whole section of books somehow.”

He chuckles, “Sounds like you, alright!” You roll your eyes.

“It sounds cliche, but he helped me up and with the books, then took me out to cheer me up. After that, we met up more and more and found ourselves going on dates. He didn’t have classes together so we mostly met up during the weekends and texted everyday. Later, I met Laura.”

“Who’s Laura?”, he asks.

“She is...was my best friend through all of med school. I’ll explain. We started dating three months later and made it official at the end of the year. We took it slow, both of us respected each other’s careers and dreams so we never had many disagreements. It was amazing, all 5 and a half years of med school. I had a wonderful, kind considerate boyfriend who knew everything about me and a best friend that always had my back. Everything was perfect, he never used me for my connections and treated me as a normal person.”, you say.

“Hah! Imagine my surprise when I looked you up on Insta!”, he says. You laugh, remembering the day when Raf and Bryce had found out about your celeb status.

“Because he was studying to be a neurosurgeon, he had an extra year so we both ended med school in the same year. His medical idol is Dr. Harper Emery, he would talk about her all the time and really held a level of respect.”, you continue.

“She is mine, too. Have you met her, like personally?”, he asks.

“I have once. It was quite a few years back during one of Edenbrook’s charity galas. Naveen had taken me there as his plus one and I met her, she was someone that you would just hold a certain level of respect.”, you say.

“Woah, woah, woah. Hold on, do you mean Naveen, as in Naveen Banerji, as in the greatest diagnostian of all time?!”, he exclaims. You wince, completely forgetting about that. Taking your time, you explain what happened with him, except about his illness. “Damn, that’s impressive. I mean, changing your last name and starting completely fresh without using any influence. Anyways, continue.”

“As you know, my inspiration and my idol was Dr. Ramsey, and we both wanted to get into Edenbrook for our residency. Laura wanted to go to Johns Hopkins Hospital for their peds program. And after our final exams, we found out that I had gotten into Edenbrook for my residency...and he didn’t. Laura didn’t get into Johns Hopkins either.”, you say recalling the horrid memories after that moment.

“I’m guessing that’s where the problem started.”, he says.

You nod. “At first, he was really happy for me and so was Laura. But after a week, he started acting cold, like he was keeping a grudge against me. I tried talking to him but he didn’t try to talk it out. One day, I couldn’t take it anymore and burst, screaming at him why he was doing this.”, your throat hitches.

“What happened?”, you can see the anger in his eyes.

“...he had the audacity to say that I had used people to get into Edenbrook for my residency. I was shocked, having thought that the person who knew me so well thought I was using my name to rig the system. We didn’t talk for a week after that, and when I was cleaning out my clothes from his closet,...I found a velvet box. It was an engagement ring.”

Bryce’s eyes go wide. If only he knew what happened next. “I thought that we could fix this, I thought that he loved me, our relationship could be saved and we would be happy. So, I knocked on his door but no one answered. After a while, I couldn’t wait so I unlocked the door with the key he gave me and…” You take a deep breath. “...Laura was kissing him….and he was kissing her back.” By now, tears are slowly making their way down your face.

“That asshole! What the hell was he thinki”- He stops at the sight of your face and takes a seat beside you, comforting you. “Hey, hey, hey. Don’t cry now. You’re one of the strongest women I’ve ever met and I’ve met a lot!” That makes you smile a bit. “That guy is an idiot, alright, for letting one of the most kind, compassionate and selfless women I’ve ever known. He doesn’t deserve you, alright!?“

You nod, brushing away your tears. “Okay.”

“Now, no more crying. Tonight, we’re going to have the time of our life! Now, finish up and we’ll go.” You finish up your food as Bryce tells you about the crazy parties he went to at Stanford.

“Oh my god! I can’t believe you did that!”, you shriek.

“I did. Now, let’s go!” After throwing away everything, you head out and Bryce leads you inside Walmart.

“What are we doing here?”, you ask.

“Just watch.” You watch as he strolls casually near a rack of clothing and yells, “There’s a snake in here!!” Your mouth and eyes widen in horror as everyone screams and runs away, leaving racks and displays to topple over each other, making a mess. “Oh sorry guys! It was just a scarf!” He quickly runs away pulling you with him out of the store before the employees can see you.

“What the hell did you do that for?!”, you half shout.

“What are you talking about, that was epic!? My mission today is to cheer you up, and I will do whatever it takes even if I have to makeshift a zip line from the 5th to the 1st floor.” You try to hide a smile but unsuccessfully end up bursting with laughter.

“Those people were sooo scared! And then I swear, one lady looked like she was about to bite your head off!!”, you say.

“Well, we’re not done yet.”, he drags you away before you can protest. A few minutes later, you’re standing in front of Urban Outfitters. “I have one more idea, and then it’s your turn.”, he says.

“What! No, there’s no way!”, you exclaim.

“Uh, uh, uh. You’re doing it.” He drags you into the store and randomly grabs three different pairs of jeans and heads towards the dressing room. “Wait here.” He points to a secluded corner as he goes inside the dressing room.

After several minutes, the door suddenly bursts open and Bryce makes a big scene. ”Ugh! What kind of jeans are these? None of them are leak-proof!” He says as he throws the jeans to the side and disappears in the racks, a few seconds later appearing by your side. You have to clamp your mouth shut after witnessing the attendant ‘s flustered and wide-eyed face.

After you both manage to escape from the shop without the woman noticing, you burst out in a fit of giggles. “Leak-proof?! That poor woman was astonished!”, you manage to blurt out in between laughter. You look up to see him smiling at you.

“What?”, you ask.

He gives you a devilish grin. “Now, it’s your turn.” Your eyes widen.

“No, no, no, no, no! There’s no way I’m embarrassing myself, that too on purpose! I have a reputation to uphold!” He looks at you. “Fine! Let me think!” You look around and spot an abandoned shopping cart, which triggers the memory of a prank Mark played before. A smirk fills your face as you say, “I have an idea. All I need is some clear beading wire.” He looks at you. “Don’t worry! I know what I’m doing!”

This time, you’re the one dragging him inside Michael’s and quickly pick out a strong wire. After paying for it, you turn to him. “Is there like a grocery store or something here?”

“I saw a Target on my way here. I think it was on the second floor.”, he says. You go down to the second floor and spot the Target.

“Okay, so are you going to tell me what your master plan is?”, he asks with a raised eyebrow. You pull him down and whisper in his ears. His eyes widen. “I didn’t think you had it in you.”

“Well, you should now by now that I’m full of surprises.”, you say as you enter the shop. After wondering around for a bit, you find the perfect place to execute your plan. You carefully set up the wire as Bryce goes to get a shopping cart.

“Did someone ask for a shopping cart?” You roll your eyes as he pushes the cart to you. “Shut up and help me with these wires.” After another 15 minutes of prep, you are finally ready to execute.

“Are you sure you want to do this?”, he asks.

“It was your idea. Plus, I’m not backing out now. Ready?” He nods as the both of you take your places. He mouths, “3...2...1!” You let out a high-pitched scream as the shopping cart rolls towards you. Attracting attention, you quickly run across the aisles as the shopping cart mysteriously follows you at quite a speed. People start shouting and screaming and you keep running and shrieking, Bryce nearby controlling the shopping cart with the wires. Everyone is freaking out, screaming and shouting, things on the shelves are completely scattered, the floor a huge mess until suddenly, you’re pulled back. Turning around, you see a security guard holding the wire, exposing you and Bryce. Shit!

A while later…

“So, I guess you being an actor and all didn’t help...that wasn’t a good idea was it?”, he says. You’re standing outside the mall you’ve been banned from for a month.

“No it wasn’t…”, you both burst out laughing. “I had an amazing time Bryce. Thank you.”

“Of course, you’re my sister from another mister.”, he makes you laugh for the millionth time as you both walk back to your apartment. By the time you reach home, it’s already 11.

“Just keep in mind that everything won’t always have a readymade solution. Sometimes you have to make your own path. Goodnight Elle.”

“Goodnight Bryce.”, you lightly kiss his cheek and head inside. After getting ready for bed, you slide into your sheets and let today’s events wash over you...when it hits you. “I know how to save Willow!” Hopping out of bed, you quickly grab a notepad and a pen. Propping open your MacBook, you start typing in a search query, knowing you have a long night ahead of you.

The next morning, you’re walking to the front desk to ask the whereabouts of Chief Emery.

“Hey Arielle! Need help with anything?”, you look to your right and see Danny walking towards you.

“Good morning Danny. Have you seen Chief Emery? I need to ask her about a treatment for a patient.”

“Umm...I think I saw her go into OR 6, but there isn’t any surgery though.” He shrugs and walks away. You shout a thank you and head to the sixth floor where all the scheduled surgeries are performed. The door is ajar as you near the OR, taking a peek inside, you see her hovering over the surgical tools, hands running over them as if she’s greeting an old friend. You wait for her to notice you until she turns around, your signature vanilla scent wafting in the air.

“Dr. Valentine. What can I do for you?”, she asks. You take a deep breath and launch into your prepared pitch for Willow’s treatment. After you’re done, your nervousness gets ahold of you leading to you biting your lip.

“So you’re telling me you want to exploit a fully funded government study for a patient’s treatment?”, she asks.

“It’s the only way for my patient to be able to afford her treatment. Edenbrook won’t be held of any charges.”, you reply thinking that as the chief, that’s what she’s worrying about.

“You sound like Dr. Ramsey.” You don’t know why, but your heart swells with pride.

“I take that as a compliment.”

She thinks it over, leaving you thinking that you blew it until, “Hand it here.” You can’t stop the smile blooming on your face as you hand her the papers. She signs them and gives them to you when your pager beeps.

“Excuse me.” You see that Willow’s being discharged. Crap! You quickly grab the papers and run back to the 1st floor all while shouting, “Thank you!” You swear that you hear her laugh.

By the time you burst into Willow’s room, you’re out of breath and the pair of twins look at you like you’re wearing an octopus as a hat. “Dr. Valentine? Is everything alright? Is something wrong with my sister?”, Rowan asks nervously. You look up to see Willow dressed and all her belongings packed as you catch your breath.

“You don’t have to leave! I found a way for you to receive your treatment!” You explain your findings and the government study. “So, it will cover all your medical expenses but both of you will have to agree.”

“Of course, I’d do anything for my sister. But, we both are still in college debt. I’ll just have to work a few extra shifts. Thank you so much, Dr. Valentine!”

You pull out the check you wrote yesterday night. “I want you to have this. It will help with your debts.” His eyes widen as he looks over the amount.

“I...I can’t possibly take this. It’s way too much”-

“No please, keep it. What’s the point of being rich if you don’t use it to help others?”, you say. Rowan hugs you.

“Thank you so so much for all your help Dr. Valentine. We’ll never forget this.”, Willow says.

“Of course.” You’re interrupted by a sharp knock at the door. Opening it, you find a doctor, but not one of Edenbrook’s.

“You must be Dr. Valentine. I'm the doctor you spoke with on the phone yesterday. There is some initial paperwork which has to be looked over and signed.

“Ah yes. You must be Dr. Martin. We’ll get started.”

After finishing up the paperwork, you head to the nurses’ station with a big smile on your lips. "What are you smiling about?" A familiar baritone voice from behind you grabs your attention. You turn around to find Ethan looking at you raising his brows.

"I found a way to help some people who deserve it. It's a really good feeling," your smile broadens.

"Well done, Rookie,", he shockingly offers you a rare smile before leaning closer. He rests one of his hands on your arm."And thanks for not telling anyone about… my patient." He sighs sadly as you study his features.

He doesn't seem happy or relieved but surely seems better rested. You sadly smile at him, "Of course...you’re not the only one who wants him to get better."

He nods at you understanding. His hand rests on your arm for one last moment after he squeezes your arm as a thank you, letting them fall to his sides.

You turn away as he requests for one of his patient charts from Marlene. You freeze seeing Dr. Emery standing across the hallway, looking at the two of you thoughtfully. You are brought back to reality by Ethan's voice, thanking the nurse and leaving. Harper looks at you one last time before walking towards the direction where Ethan went.

Ethan's P.O.V

You are forced to look up from Naveen's recent test results when you hear a knock.

"Come in," you say keeping your voice devoid of any friendliness, thinking it was some intern. “Or a certain intern with violet hair!”, your mind reminds you. The door opens, revealing Harper who waltzes in and takes a seat opposite to you.

“What can I do for the Chief of Medicine today?”, you ask.

“I just wanted to see how my friend was doing. Is that a crime?”, she asks.

You scoff, “I’ve known you for a long time Harper, and quite well enough to know when you want something.”

“I’ve been noticing you’ve been quite distant these past few weeks, you’re never found in your office, always somewhere around the hospital.”

“So she has been noticing your behaviour.”, you think. “I’m not distant. I’m just busy.”, you reply with a roll of your eyes.

Her voice softens, “Ethan, you know I’m still your friend. You can talk to me.”, she says.

“Not anymore, not when you’re the Chief of Medicine I can’t.”, you think. You blatantly lie, “I’m perfectly fine Harper. Now I’m sure you have much more important work to do.” With a sigh, she exits your office.

”I know she’ll discover this someday, but when she does...would everything be alright?”

Part 1 of taglist:- @kaavyaethanramsey @rookie-ramsey @ohramsey @ohvamsey @hopelessromantics4life @realmrsramsey @mysticaurathings @binny1985 @maurine07 @alina-yol-ramsey @helloitsthiv @tsrookie @arcticlumineer @mary-c92 @sad-satan-herself @whippedforethanfreakingramsey @archxxronrookie @ethansrookie02 @semanticsandsea-lemons @mrandmrsramsey @nikki-2406 @deepikakkannan @siaramsey @katkart122 @openheartthot @imonlybibecauseofethanramsey @akshara16 @luvevelynclaire @literaryexpress @miss-smrxtiee @nadeen-ahmed11 @mrsalanrickman394 @drstellavalentine @ethandaddyramseyx @annekebbphotography @custaroonie @ladyrileybrooks @robbies-sutcliffe @cralinedp @bladesofopenheart @ezekielbhandarivalleros @daddyethanramsey @aquirkychica @romewritingshop @lilyvalentine @xpandabeardontcarex @in-love-with-a-trans-girl @coastalengineer @starrystarrytrouble @clowneryme

#open heart #playchoices #ethanjonahramsey #ohsy #collab #ethan x mc #modern au #open heart fanfic #from the bottom of my heart #thank you for never getting tired of them #diyaa writes

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gypsydanger01 · 4 years ago

Text

THE STORM - Part sixteen

Fandom: The Boys (Amazon prime tv series)

Pairing: Black Noir x OC

Disclaimer: I don’t own The Boys, only my OC characters and certain pieces of au plot.

Comments, reviews, constructive criticism, and other requests are always more than welcome!

Posting new chapters on Wednesday and Friday!

The Night of the Infiltration

While she’d spent the night dissecting her and Noir’s relationship, she rose from bed the next morning with a clear head. With a long night ahead, she could not afford any distractions. At work, her and Martha chatted, and the blonde attempted to gauge her friend’s state of mind. She seemed steady, focused and—well, normal. Nothing seemed to affect her or frustrate her in the least that day. Not the printer not working, or her computer experiencing technical issues. She didn’t mind the terribly long line in the cafeteria and didn’t seem to care when her papers were misplaced by the office mailman. She was utterly impassive.

Martha worried, even though these were all positive signs. If she’d seen Sarah growing evermore nervous and angry, she’d have pulled the plug. Her being impassive meant she had better control over her more violent emotions.

And soon, people began to gather their things and leave.

Martha and Sarah also shrugged on their coats, packed their bags, and left the building. Before heading their separate ways, Martha grabbed her hand bringing them to a halt.

“Be careful tonight, okay?”

Sarah nodded, wrapping her arms around herself and looking at the crowd swarming the sidewalks.

“I’m serious,” Martha pressed, “I’ll be ready, and get it done as quickly as possible.”

“I know, I’ll be careful,” Sarah promised.

Martha nodded, satisfied with her answer, and pulled her friend into a tight hug.

She whispered, “Don’t worry, we got this, girl.”

And with a wink, Martha spun around and disappeared into the crowd. Sarah chuckled and turned the opposite way to head home.

An hour before go-time, Sarah could be found arming herself in her home. She steeled herself against rushing, and instead took her time. She had changed into a black suit and packed a small bag with the files and thumb drive she’d need once in the archives.

She wore a black wig with long bangs, since she wouldn’t be able to avoid all the security cameras placed between the back entrance and the archives. The wig would confuse them of her identity since her curly hair was a distinctive aspect of her persona. It would immediately give her away. And pulling her hair into a tight bun was strictly not an option, since pulling her hair back accentuated her features.

The suit had a particularly long turtleneck which she could easily lift over her nose, leaving only the upper part of her face exposed. That paired with the wig would be enough to conceal her identity.

She checked her utility belt and finished fixing a series of knives into their sheaths. A single gun with silencer was strapped to the top of her back where she could easily access it. A set of throwing knives were securely tucked against her calves in the side of her heavy-duty boots.

Looking in the mirror, she approved of the sleek, dark vision that was her reflection. She would be such a dangerous piece in this game against Vought. She would be unstoppable. A force to be reckoned with.

Finally, she settled at her kitchen table and waited for the minutes to tick by, counting down to the moment for action. When the clock struck eleven, she rose and made her way out the back door. Crossing her dimly lit backyard, she hoisted herself over the wooden fence and disappeared into the shadows of the back alleys.

Once she’d made it to Vought’s back entrance, she quickly slipped on the glove she’d gotten from Mallory. It felt odd on her skin, as it was made from a biosynthetic material. As soon as the sensor captured the fingerprints, she quickly shrugged it off and placed it into its protective case, which she then slid back into her bag. She stepped into the elevator and punched the button for level 02.

The elevator rose soundlessly, no music or simple tune to ease the tension. The doors slid open, and she cautiously stepped out. She quickly moved down the hall towards the archives and pressed her back to the wall as she neared the final corner to reach its entrance. At night, there were always a team of guards who made sure there were no break-ins, even though it had never occurred before. Two were placed at the building’s entrance, another two near the R&D sector of the building and one near the archives.

She heard the scuffle of shoes against tiled pavement, and the deep sigh that followed. She pulled out a small mirror and used it to look beyond the corner.

There he was. The guard seemed fit, maybe in his mid-thirties. He was seated and scrolling through whatever had his attention on the tablet he held.

Sarah flipped the mirror shut, storing it away.

She grabbed the baton from her belt and focused on her breathing. At her next exhalation, she moved out into the hall and flipped it in his direction. It hit him straight in the face, and while he raised his hands, she sped towards him, kicking him down.

“what the fu—”

She twisted his arm behind his back, and removed all of his weapons, sliding them out of reach. Finally, she crooked her other arm around his neck and dragged him out of potential cameras’ view.

The radio on the guard’s belt crackled to life, “Hey we heard something down your way. Everything okay?”

She pressed harder on his windpipe. “Answer them. Everything is fine.”

“You bitc—”

“None of that, I’m afraid,” she scolded. “Now tell me,” she questioned with a genuinely curious voice, “Do you care more about this company or your life?”

She felt him go still in her arms, followed by a useless attempt to get out of her hold. She held fast, focusing on the mechanics of her grip rather than brute strength. He could get out of the hold, but to do so he’d have to break his own shoulder. She smirked.

“I’ll repeat myself one more time,” she whispered, “Are you going to give your life for this fucking company tonight?”

Finally, he shook his head no.

“Then tell your buddies you dropped your tablet or some bullshit like that.”

He nodded, and she brought the mic up to his lips.

“Everything’s all right, boys,” he hesitated, “Just dropped my tablet with my dumb ass.”

Some laughs broke through the small device, “Take it easy Jackson.”

She clicked the radio’s mic off, satisfied with his answer.

“Yeah, take it easy Jackson,” she whispered in his ear before effectively knocking him out. She took the key card from around his neck.

Sarah rose and flattened her bangs back into place. Stepping over his body, she walked over to the entrance and swiped the card. Access granted.

She withheld her satisfaction and stepped into the dimly lit space. Closing the door behind her, she switched the lights on.

The room was even larger than she had imagined. Rows and rows of servers occupied the room and shelves with boxes full of files lined the walls. A single desk and computer sat alone at the entrance. She quickly took a seat and searched the index for the items she needed to find.

She searched the applied physiology lab and couldn’t find any match. She ran a hand through the straight black locks of hair, sighing in frustration. The guard would be out for a while, but not long enough for her to search the whole database. She inserted a few more dead-end searches. Finally, an idea struck. She typed in her patient code from when she’d been a part of Vought’s experimental treatment. Surely they kept records of their experiments, trials and advancements.

She struck gold and immediately noted the server code on a small piece of paper. Then she quickly searched for Sarah Burns, immediately finding her file among the Vought employees. She noted her file’s position amid the boxes as well.

She turned the computer off and rose out of her seat, taking a second to figure her way through the maze of servers.

Once she’d found the right one, she recalled Martha’s directions on where to put the thumb drive. Double checking, she plugged it into the right slot and pulled her burner phone out.

She sent a quick text. I’m in.

Not ten seconds later, she’d received an answer. I’m on it.

In the meantime, she made her way towards the employee files, committing the path to memory so that she could later find her way back to the thumb drive.

She found her box and flipped through the different folders held inside. Finally, she reached the one on Sarah Burns. She took the papers out and replaced them with the ones she’d fabricated in their stead. Slipping the originals into her bag, she put the box back in its place.

Turning around, she sped back to the server they were currently hacking.

She checked her phone as she weaved through the columns of devices, wires and switches.

She’d gotten a text. Done.

She sent one back. Ok, I’m going to disconnect.

There were only a few corners left and she’d have the USB, ready to leave the building.

It’s already disconnected.

This immediately made her halt. She gathered her breathing, her already alert state of mind sharpening even further. She wasn’t alone.

If it was the guard, there would be no issue, but if it was a member of the Seven, this room was about to be wrecked. She prayed that it wasn't Homelander.

She inched closer with caution in every step.

She peered around the corner and found the server’s glass door closed with no thumb drive sticking out of it. She wanted to curse but focused instead on the sounds around her. When she heard nothing, no steps, no breathing, she realized someone was watching her, toying with her.

Did they already know? Had they simply been waiting for her to make a move?

Well, at this point they’d caught her red-handed.

That’s when she heard the slightest sound, followed by the movement of air behind her. She spun around, and almost choked.

Noir had jumped down from the top of a server and was now standing in the middle of the corridor. One of his gloved hands was curled into a fist, which without a doubt held the thumb drive she so desperately needed.

Oh God, she thought. This isn’t going to end well.

They stood still, staring, and waiting for each other to make the first move. If he was waiting to see if she’d run, he was going to find himself terribly disappointed. She knew from her data collection with Mallory that he enjoyed a hunt. This would be no predator and prey dynamic.

This was a predator facing another predator over a piece of property. She would not go down easy, nor would she flee like a scared rabbit.

Black Noir observed the darkly clad woman standing across the hallway. She seemed untroubled by his presence and didn’t seem likely to back down. There was a deep-set power to her that he had difficulty pinpointing. She looked like an elastic ready to snap.

Tired of waiting, he took firm steps towards her. Any enemy of Vought was an enemy of his, and Mr. Edgar had given him clear orders. She was to be either detained or eliminated.

As he moved towards her, she held still. She watched him approach, and he almost faltered at the intensity of her gaze, the total lack of fear in her awfully familiar eyes.

The eyes that were blazed in his mind since that night at the gala…

Shaking his head of those thoughts, he focused on the task at hand. As he reached her, he wrapped his fingers around her neck hoisting her off the ground.

Sarah felt the characteristic surge of warmth and energy surge through her chest and outwards through her limbs. She placed her palm against his chest plate, feeling it melt under her touch. Finally, she let go. The sudden transfer of energy sent him flying backwards and through a server which crackled and beeped loudly as it went offline.

Noir stepped out of the wrecked device and looked at her before rushing to the side and slamming her through another server. She literally burnt a hole through the tower and looked back at him through the opening. Sarah almost laughed, immediately hoisting herself up off the pavement. She felt a surge of energy and climbed to the top where he met her.

She took a standard fighting position, ready for anything he’d send her way. It’d been some time since she’d fought, and this would be the first time she’d be challenged by someone of equal strength. There was no holding back here, on either side.

And she’d get the thumb drive back no matter what.

Again, he was the first to move in with a punch aimed straight for her head. Sliding under his outstretched arm, she kicked his knee hard and punched him in the stomach before backing away.

Reaching down, she took a dagger into hand and threw it his way, nicking his cheek. If she’d wanted to she could have sent it flying into his skull, although that too wouldn’t have been enough to stop him. Still, it had been a warning.

The fight went on, equal forces clashing against one another.

But then he caught her in a chokehold that she couldn’t escape. She wouldn’t allow him to end her or put her to sleep and have her captured. There was no way in hell it would all end here, this way.

She focused on her anger, on the pain, on her mother and father’s faces. Her mind conjured butterflies in the air around her and she followed their intricate dances intently. She smelled the smoke, felt the ashes softly coating her cheeks.

As he held her close, slowly cutting off her air supply, Black Noir came to a sudden realization. The sudden whiff of vanilla conditioning cream made him still. Her eyes. Her scent.

And then she let go, and the air around them exploded like a set of bombs.

When the dust settled, and she opened her eyes, she searched for Noir afraid of what she’d find. She found him among the wreckage, lying on his back a hand to his side.

She rushed over and cautiously kneeled beside him. She stayed alert, knowing he could kill her even in an impaired state, be it by a silent dagger or the snap of her neck.

He reached one hand up to her cheek, and she knew he’d connected the dots. Everything would be different now. Her cover was blown.

But then he did something that took her by surprise: one hand slipped into a pocket, and instead of the expected dagger, he extracted a slightly fuming, still intact thumb drive.

He held it up for her to take and signed a simple word. She nodded and squeezed his hand with her own before standing and running away. The blast had destroyed a part of the servers and it had sent the security alarms blaring. Red lights flashed in the corridors she ran down to reach the back entrance she’d used to get in.

Her brain ran even faster, thoughts clouding her senses. Ultimately, she shut them all out. She cleared her mind of everything but the thumb drive in her hand.

She thought back to Noir’s advice, or maybe threat. The one simple word he’d signed.

“Run.”

MASTERLIST

Tag list: @ateliefloresdaprimavera @ellejo @dust-bun @coco724 @proximio-5 @damiminator @omegahighendpro @rpgluvr95 @sweetrabbitteamx @rayray1463

#the boys #the boys tv #the boys amazon #black noir #the boys season 2 #fanfiction #oc story #romance #black noir x oc

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moldisgoodforyou · 4 years ago

Text

give a little: chapter seven (college! jj maybank x oc)

MASTERLIST

(gif from @toesure !)

pairing: jj maybank x oc

synopsis: charlie & jj get heated. rafe tries to stir up trouble.

warnings: mentions of sex, drinking, violence, possible triggering mention of abuse, all characters are 21+

wordcount: 3k

_______________________________________________________________________

After the fight, JJ texted Charlie consistently to check in, giving her advice about her hand and asking to hang out again. In an effort to keep JJ at arm’s length, Charlie kept her texts short and sweet. It had been a month since they first flirted at the party at the start of the summer.

It took a few days for JJ to get the hint, but he eventually backed off with his texting. Their run-ins around the island - at the grocery store, passing him and the Pogues at the Wreck as she went to work - were fairly infrequent, but friendly. He even ran into Grace on the beach and inquired about her, but loyal as always, she just rolled her eyes and left him with a “she’s doing just fine, Maybank.” After a week, JJ had enough and reached out again.

JJ: Party this Friday?

Charlie: you’re throwing one?

JJ: No, Cameron is

Charlie: rafe invited you to a party??

JJ: Sorry, I meant Sarah, but he’ll probably be there

JJ: Perfect opportunity for your plan?

Charlie: I’ll meet you there

JJ: Can’t wait to see you, Walker

Charlie: 🙄

JJ: 😘

Charlie showed up late to the party for no good reason at all, wearing her typical beach party attire of a bright red bikini top and jean shorts. Looking around at the rest of the Kooks, she felt out of place, wishing she had at least thrown on a skirt. It didn’t take long for JJ to find her, wrapping his arms around her from behind and pressing a kiss to her temple. “Hi, Walker. You look pretty,” he murmured to her. He lifted her bruised hand carefully, inspecting it. The bruise was yellowing and her thumb, having stayed in a splint for the past week, was back to its normal size. “Hi JJ. It’s mainly healed,” she said. “Good,” he replied. She leaned back into his touch. She hadn’t realized how much she missed being around him, inhaling his familiar scent, a mix of woodsy cologne and spearmint. There was something so reassuring about the way she fit just right in his embrace. “Did I miss anything?”

He shook his head and gently grabbed her hips, turning her in to face him. “No, but I waited for you to get here before I started drinking and I need a pong partner. And I know you’re good. I’ve seen you dominate on Thursday nights.” She grinned. “Who are we up against?” He grinned back and took her hand, leading her through the crowd. John B and Sarah were at the other end of the table and Sarah was double fisting two White Claws, already leaning into John B. She waved excitedly at Charlie. JJ ducked his head and whispered into Charlie’s hair, his lips brushing against her ear. “You thought you had a low tolerance, meet drunky over here.” She barely heard him, her heart beating faster at his touch.

“Are you two done flirting and ready to play?” John B called out across the table, hitting JJ with a ping pong ball. JJ caught it after the bounce and took a shot, the ball sinking into the cup with a small splash. Charlie grinned. “Nice, Maybank!” JJ smirked, handing her the ball after Sarah missed her shot by a wide margin. He stood close behind her, his arms snaking around her waist and resting his chin on her shoulder. Charlie tossed the ball, it bouncing off the rim of the cup. “Don’t let me down, pretty girl,” he murmured into her ear. Charlie closed her eyes, mumbling back. “I can’t concentrate with you so close.” JJ grinned, trailing a finger down her hip and along the frayed hem of her shorts. “Yeah?”

Charlie shivered and swatted at his hand, stepping out of his grip. “Do you want to win or not?”

JJ shrugged. “I can think of more fun things we could be doing.”

Charlie immediately blushed, eyes widening. “Like what?”

JJ just laughed and drained another shot into John B and Sarah’s cups. “I’ll let you interpret that.”

To Charlie, it felt like the game dragged on for forever, JJ teasing her the entire time. His breath on her neck. His hips pressing into hers from behind. His hand gripping her hip, his thumb rubbing circles on her hip bone. The second Charlie sunk the final shot to win the game, she grabbed his hand and pulled him into the nearest private place she could find - which just so happened to be the pantry.

“What on earth are you doing?” She questioned, flicking the light on and crossing her arms.

JJ stepped close, backing her against a shelf. “What do you think I’m doing?”

“I don’t know, but I need you to do something or quit altogether.”

He smirked. “Needy girl.”

“God damnit, Maybank, I can’t stand the teasing.” Charlie whined.

“Then why were you practically avoiding me all week?” JJ asked, resting his forearms on the wall above her head.

She frowned slightly. “I wasn’t.”

“You were.” JJ said pointedly. “Is it because of the fight?”

Charlie shook her head. “No, not at all. I just..I just needed to be sure this is what I wanted to do.”

JJ quirked an eyebrow, leaning closer. “Is it?”

She nodded, confident. “Yes. I want to be with - um, I want to do this with you.”

JJ paused at her slip of the tongue. “Do what?”

Charlie stumbled over her words. “Um. The plan.”

“Right. The plan. Well, we can’t make a man jealous from inside the pantry.” He reasoned, taking another step forward and pressing his hips into hers.

Charlie reached over and flicked off the light. “I don’t care, just kiss me.”

That was enough for JJ. He crashed his lips down into hers and she kissed back heatedly, wrapping her arms around his neck. She moaned softly into the kiss and grabbed at the hem of his shirt, tugging up. “Off.” JJ grinned against her lips. “Demanding, aren’t we?”

“Shut it, I’m hardly wearing a shirt, it’s only fair,” Charlie mumbled back, tossing his shirt aside. JJ slid his hands under her ass, lifting her, and Charlie wrapped her legs around his waist. She left open-mouthed kisses along his jaw up to his ear, nipping at his earlobe with her teeth. He groaned loudly and she pressed her lips against his. “Shh. I don’t want to get caught.”

She threaded her fingers through his hair, raking her nails against his scalp and rocked her hips against his. He quickly moved one of his hands to her hip to stop her, pulling back from the kiss. “If you keep doing that we’re gonna have a problem on our hands,” he warned, gesturing to his already-evident hard on. Charlie smirked. “Can’t control yourself, Maybank?”

He shook his head seriously. “You’re the one that pulled me in here!”

“Because your hands were all over me!” She retorted.

He smirked. “No they weren’t. Just wait ‘til I actually have my hands all over you, then you won’t be able to control yourself.” He slipped his thumb under the edge of her swim top, tracing it down the side of her chest and around her back. “You look killer in red.”

Charlie let out a soft moan, her nipples hard through her fabric. “Shut up and let me kiss you.” She pulled his head down to hers, her tongue slipping in to explore her mouth. He groaned, his grip on her ass tightening.

Suddenly the door swung open and the pantry was flooded with light. JJ swung around, caught off guard, and Charlie buried her face in his shoulder, embarrassed. Sarah stood in the doorway, clearly plastered, and giggled. “Oh shit, sorry guys, um, maybe find a better place to hook up though?” JJ glared at Sarah and pointed at the door. “Cameron, get out.” Sarah rolled her eyes. “Oh my god, I just wanted a snack. Whatever.”

She closed the door and JJ reached over to flick on the lights. He let her down gently and laughed, sheepish. Charlie covered her face with her hands. “Oh my god, that’s so embarrassing.” JJ took her hands from her face and smirked. “I’m gonna take this opportunity to remind you that you’re the one that came on to me, baby.” Charlie sighed, pretending to be annoyed. “Again. Not your baby.” He grinned and leaned in to kiss her again but she ducked out from under him. “Wait, that’s it? You’re really gonna leave me with blue balls?” He complained.

Charlie gave him a chaste kiss on the cheek. “There. Better?” She glanced toward his hard on and smirked when she saw it, proud of her influence.

“We could do it in Rafe’s bedroom,” he suggested eagerly.

Charlie pretended to gag and grabbed his shirt from the floor, shoving it against his chest. “Literally nothing sounds worse.”

He laughed and pulled his shirt on, then reached out and smoothed her hair. “You look like you just got fucked.” He grinned, running his thumb against her lips.

She bit it playfully. “In my dreams.” She grinned back, hearing JJ’s groan in response, then walked out of the pantry alone.

JJ stood in the pantry for a good five minutes, thinking about math problems and his old-as-hell professor to will his erection away. He finally left the pantry and went back to the pong table by Sarah and the rest of the Pogues, but Charlie was nowhere to be found. “Where’s Charlie?” He asked John B. John B shrugged. “Weren’t you just with her?” JJ frowned and doubled back.

He heard a pair of voices as he moved further away from the party and closer to the hallway by the bedrooms. He stopped in his tracks, seeing Rafe alone with Charlie. “I just wanna talk, Charlotte,” Rafe breathed against Charlie’s ear, trapping her against the wall. Charlie shuddered, smelling the alcohol on his breath. She pushed him off of her and JJ walked closer. “Charlie? You alright?”

Rafe quickly turned, hearing JJ’s voice. “She’s fine, pogue, just making sure her hand’s alright. Had to show her that she left a scar.” He growled, gesturing to a small nick from her ring under his partly-healed black eye.

Charlie quickly moved to stand by JJ and he put his arm around her shoulders. “Leave her alone, Rafe,” JJ bit out in a surprisingly even tone.

Rafe smirked at JJ, raising his solo cup in a mock toast. “Did she learn that hit from you? I’m not surprised, it was solid.” He sneered at Charlie. “Control your bitch, Maybank.”

JJ raised his fist as he stepped toward Rafe and Charlie stepped in front of him, cutting off his path. “Don’t, JJ,” she urged. JJ scowled. “Fuck you, Rafe, don’t talk about her like that.”

Rafe shrugged and just smiled. “Sluts should be treated as such.”

Charlie shoved Rafe, hard. “Rafe. Shut the fuck up. Walk away.”

JJ had his fists clenched and he was practically shaking with rage, seeing red.

Rafe smirked and held his ground. He looked Charlie directly in the eye, straightening his posture so he was looking down his nose at her. “That dirty mouth is exactly why you deserved to be cheated on.”

At that, JJ lunged past Charlie and swung, but Rafe ducked in time. He grabbed a fistful of JJ’s shirt and they both went down, swinging fists back and forth. JJ slammed his fist into Rafe’s cheek and Rafe responded quickly, punching JJ square in the mouth.

Charlie yelled out, afraid to move. “JJ, Rafe, stop!”

As the commotion got louder, a small crowd gathered. It didn’t take long for John B and Pope to come sprinting down the hall, Kiara and Sarah just behind. Topper and Kelce followed. John B grabbed JJ and pulled him off of Rafe, Topper doing the same. JJ was able to get a well-placed kick to Rafe’s groin as John B dragged him away and Rafe groaned, buckling at his knees. As the fight broke up, people started returning to the party and Rafe was brought into his room to be fixed up. John B finally let go of JJ once he stopped fighting to go after Rafe again.

Charlie just stared at JJ with wide eyes once John B let him go. JJ frowned and stepped forward to embrace her in a hug, but Charlie stepped back. “Charlie, I just…I was trying to protect you.” He tried, faltering at her expression. Charlie shook her head. “It’s...fine. I’m just gonna..um, clear my head.” She turned and hurriedly left back toward the party, out to the backyard. Kiara watched her go, then stopped JJ from following her. “I’ll go find her. Give her a minute.” JJ watched his friend follow after Charlie, then sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Fuck.” John B sympathetically clapped him on the shoulder. “I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

_______________________________________________________________________

Out at the party, Charlie sat alone way out in the backyard, looking out at the water with her knees pulled up to her chest. She couldn’t stop replaying the visual of JJ throwing punches left and right, without hesitation. “Charlie?” Kie asked, stepping up behind her. “Are you okay?” Charlie nodded, eyes trained on the ocean. Kie sat next to her, glancing over her for any signs of a fight on her part. “What happened?” She asked gently. Charlie ran her hands over her face, sighing. “Um, I went to go find the bathroom and Rafe ran into me. He was just being a dick, and then JJ found us and Rafe said some...stuff to piss him off.” Charlie frowned. “I wish he could have just walked away.”

Kiara laughed softly. “JJ will never walk away if someone talks shit about someone he cares about.” Charlie shrugged. “I doubt he feels like that about me.” Kie frowned a little. “He’s worried about you. Can I tell him you’re out here?” Charlie paused, then nodded. “Yeah.” Kiara got up, then turned back to Charlie before walking away. “Be careful with him, all right?” She left, leaving Charlie wondering.

Ten minutes later, JJ walked up and sat next to Charlie, leaving some space between them. Charlie moved over and filled the space, leaning into him slightly. He wrapped an arm around her and squeezed her shoulders gently. She looked up and examined his face. He was sporting a split lip, but nothing more. “Are you alright, Charlie? What happened? He didn’t touch you, did he?” He asked, concerned. Charlie nodded. “I’m fine. After I left you, I was looking for the bathroom and we ran into each other. You found us pretty quickly.”

JJ frowned, playing with her hair to comfort her. “Why did you come out here?” he asked. Charlie tilted her head toward him as he gently combed through her hair with his fingers and bit her lip, thinking before she spoke. “I hate fighting. Rafe used to get into fights all the time when we dated, it freaked me out every time. Seeing him violent like that.” JJ sighed quietly and sat her up so he could look her in the eye. “Did he ever hit you, Charlie?” Charlie shook her head quickly. “No, no, never. He just yelled a lot. He just wasn’t very nice,” she understated.

“Why didn’t you just walk away, JJ? Why do you always fight?” JJ’s frown deepened. “It’s a long story.” Charlie crossed her arms. “I have time.” JJ shook his head. “No, it’s not like that. I, um.” He shifted, clearly uncomfortable and it was Charlie’s turn to be concerned. “You can trust me, JJ.” He twisted his rings as a nervous habit until she took one of his hands in hers. He closed his eyes, not wanting to look at her. “Uh. My mom left when I was younger, and my dad wasn’t too happy about that growing up. We got in fights a lot.” He opened his eyes, afraid of Charlie’s reaction. “All parents fight with their kids,” she replied, confused. JJ swallowed and looked down at his feet. “Not like mine.”

It clicked and Charlie let out a small sigh. “Oh, JJ...” JJ ran his hand through his hair, not making eye contact. “It’s fine. I don’t want to talk about it. I moved in with John B the second I turned 18 so I’ve had time to get over it.” Charlie moved closer and put her arms around his shoulders, pulling him in so his head was on her chest. He leaned into her as she held him tight. “I’m so sorry, JJ. I wouldn’t have asked,” she murmured. JJ shook his head. “S’okay. I just hate hearing him talk about you like that. You don’t deserve that trash.” She pressed a kiss into his hair. “I don’t want you to get hurt over me.”

“I’m okay. He’s a shit fighter anyway.” JJ mumbled.

Charlie laughed softly. “Not the point, J.”

He sat up a little. “That’s new.”

“Hm?”

“J. You’ve never called me that.”

Charlie paused. “Is that okay?”

JJ nodded, settling back into her. “I like it.” Charlie smiled and ran her fingers through his hair for a few minutes as the two of them sat together in silence. She pressed another kiss into his hair and shook her head to herself, thinking. “JJ?”

“Yeah?”

“My cousin is getting married next week. Do you want to go with me?”

He sat up quickly. “You want me to be at your cousin’s wedding?” He sounded a little incredulous. “Why, is Rafe gonna be there?”

Charlie shook her head. “No, no, of course not.”

“So...why are you inviting me?”

Charlie flicked his arm. “Because I like you, Maybank.”

JJ beamed at her affirmation. “You’re alright,” he teased. Charlie scowled and poked his side, and JJ did the same. Charlie flinched away, laughing. “Watch your hands!”

“You didn’t mind them earlier, Walker.” He smirked. “And we never finished what we started…”

Charlie blushed. “You’re trouble.”

He grinned. “You like trouble.”

TAGLIST: @booksandshish @jiaraendgame @hmsjiara @outerbanksbro @alexa-playafricabytoto @annedub @casper17

#SORRY #i messed it up the first time and left out crucial paragraphs #obx fanfic #obx fanfiction #jj maybank obx #college!obx #college jj #college outer banks #jj outer banks #jj x reader #jj maybank #jj maybank fanfiction #mine #jj x charlie

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ghostbustermelanieking · 5 years ago

Text

phantom weights chapter seven

one, two, three, four, five, six

season 11, post my struggle iv. part of my series that i write as i rewatch the x files.

Summary: In the wake of their second encounter, Mulder, Scully, and Jackson reconnect (both by accident and on purpose.)

thanks to @reasonandfaithinharmony for advice on this chapter, and the suggestion of the type of thing mulder should say towards the end of this chapter.

---

On an evening nearly three weeks after Lily was born, Mulder was sitting out on the porch with her and watching the sun set. Scully was inside, asleep on the couch; her sleeping schedule had grown sporadic and spotty in recent days, and she tried to sleep when the baby was sleeping, but those periods didn't always overlap, and Mulder hated to wake her up, even if it was an odd time to nap. Anytime she could sleep for more than twenty minutes before being woken up seemed like a blessing to him.

Lily was staring at Mulder with a focused sort of look, like she was concentrating hard, when he saw a car rolling down the driveway, Jackson at the wheel. His son's face illuminated by the orange light of the sinking sun, his expression unreadable. Mulder was overjoyed and nervous to see him all at once.

"There's your big brother," he whispered to Lily, who grabbed at his nose determinedly. He chuckled and moved her down to the crook of one arm as he stood, lifting his opposite hand in a wave. He absently wondered how long Jackson would be here this time.

Jackson gathered a bundle of plastic bags from the car and jogged up to the porch. "Hey," he said as he mounted the stairs, breathing hard. "I-I brought you guys some takeout. Japanese. Figured you wouldn't want to cook, right?"

Surprised, Mulder said, "Right." He didn't mind cooking, of course, and even Scully tried to take a turn or two when he himself was asleep, but it would be nice not to have to cook or drive into town for food. (Delivery only went so far out, and they seemed to be past the realm of reasonable delivery. And no one liked to deal with the damned gate.) The baby started to fuss and he shushed her, rocking back and forth awkwardly.

"Hey, kid," Jackson said, addressing Lily. She continued to whimper, her face half-turned into Mulder's shirt. "She's happy to see me," he said dryly. "Is she hungry?"

"Probably." Mulder held her against his chest, whispering soothing things against her downy head. He should probably go wake up Scully; Lily needed to eat, and she'd want to see Jackson. "D-do you wanna come in, Jackson?" he asked, hoping desperately his voice was welcoming. He was happy to see him, incredibly so, and he hated the little bit of hesitance inside of him. He smiled at his son, bouncing his daughter up and down gently, but the smile felt a little thin, and he hated that. He tried to smile harder.

He couldn't tell if Jackson noticed. He nodded eagerly, heading for the door. "Yeah, that… that'd be great, thanks."

---

It was Sarah's break-in that had done it, really. Had convinced him that nothing was happening, that it was all in his head.

Jackson had been back and forth on the whole issue since Lily's birth. It was clear that he had misinterpreted the situation; he could see the whole situation a little clearer now, after the whole thing was over, and when he'd gotten home to Richmond and saw that Mulder's panic was a result of fear and past trauma. He hadn't been there when Jackson had been born and found it hard to see Dana in pain, he'd had to fight his way through a crowd of strangers in a strange place to get to them after the birth. It was no wonder he was scared and suspicious of everyone who came into Dana's hospital room, especially considering the increased risk of having a child at her age. The realization that they'd both had an overreaction made Jackson feel a little foolish, but it was also sort of relieving, knowing they hadn't been in danger. (The fact that no one had come for the baby was very reassuring. Jackson still got flashes of his birth sometimes, of that strange, dusty place, strangers packed around the bed, staring at him, Dana screaming, "This is my baby! You can't have him!" He'd been terrified that it would happen to his sister—and considering Mulder's panic, he hadn't been the only one.)

The fear hadn't dissipated; when he'd ran, he had been worried that they were still coming for him. But the false alarm had left Jackson wary, wary of his paranoia. He'd overreacted as much as Mulder, and the things that had set him off in the past seemed arbitrary in comparison. Both times he'd feared they were targeting people to get to him—the break-in at Sarah's house, and the people watching Mulder and Dana at the beach—nothing seemed to come of the threats. He checked in on Sarah every now and then, just to see that she was okay, and she was always fine. No more break-ins, that he could see, and no attempts to take her, no one following her… Of course, he didn't see everything, it felt wrong to be in his ex-girlfriend's head after everything, but from what he saw, it seemed okay. She seemed okay, seemed happy. And he checked in on Bri, every now and then, and saw more of the same. Normality. They'd left him behind, and he knew it was for the best.

Nobody was going after Bri or Sarah, and nobody seemed to be going after his family—he'd checked in with his grandmother, the one who hated him now, and his Aunt Ursula, and his uncle who was some hunter up in Alaska or whatever. And no one after Mulder and Dana, either, and they seemed like the obvious choice. They were the ones mixed up in all of this. They were the ones bringing another kid like him into the world. But no one seemed to be coming for them, either. Not since that trip to the beach, and even then, those people had never directly gone after them. They'd just hung back, taking pictures. They hadn't gone after Jackson when he ran, and they hadn't gone after Mulder and Dana while he was gone… So what had they wanted, if not him? Why hadn't they chased him? Why hadn't they gone after Mulder and Dana if they wanted them?

Mulder thought this was all over. He'd said as much, back in July, when Jackson had asked about the people coming after him, who'd come all their lives. I'm inclined to believe this is all over, he'd said. Jackson hadn't believed him at the time, but what if he was right?

And then Jackson's Google alert had pinged. He'd gotten an email that he saw at the library. They caught the guy who robbed Sarah's house. He was a kid who had a crush on her younger sister, and was annoyed that she wouldn't give him the time of day. Apparently he'd been breaking into places for years, apparently he wanted to scare Sarah's sister as revenge, and all the stolen shit was just a bonus. Not a trained assassin, just a stupid asshole who liked break-ins. Maybe it was a cover for the assassins, but Jackson didn't think it was. It didn't feel like it was.

It had made him think about things. The break-in was a coincidence, just like the thing with Mulder and Dana had been a coincidence. And it made him start thinking about what happened at the beach. He'd reached, and he landed on a memory, the morning after he'd been a total asshole and then ran out. Dana taking Daggoo out to pee, and the neighbors coming to talk to her. They weren't assassins or agents, at least not according to what they'd said to Dana. They had recognized Dana and Mulder from that jackass Tad O'Malley's web show. They were fans, not assassins; they were taking pictures because they recognized Dana and Mulder from that show. That was why they were watching, and that was why they didn't ever come for them.

Maybe it was all a coincidence. Jackson lodged that idea firmly in his mind and didn't let it go. He couldn't let his guard down, not again. But thinking back to everything that had happened put things into perspective. He had been staying in one place for months, and they hadn't found him. Sure, he'd been careful, he used aliases, but he'd used aliases on the run, when he was constantly moving and hiding, and they still found him. Why hadn't they found him now? If they wanted him, why hadn't they come? It was easier to get to him now than ever before. They could've come, but they hadn't, and maybe that meant it was really over.

Jackson didn't know for sure. But he had been trying to let go of his paranoia, at least a little. He didn't want to be so closed off from people. It was a lonely fucking way to live. He didn't exactly know who he could reconnect with, but he needed someone. He couldn't keep living alone, on edge. He couldn't do it. He was torturing himself, living in constant paranoia, constantly worrying. He couldn't take it. Who could fucking take it?

And besides that, he wanted to see the kid again. He'd promised he would come back, and he intended to keep that promise. It was time he checked in, made sure Lily was getting along okay. It was time he tried to make amends with Dana and Mulder.

So he'd driven up to Farrs Corner, stopped and got some food—a peace offering, maybe—and made the long trek out to their house. He found Mulder and the kid out on the porch, and felt the same wave of relief and welcoming that he usually felt from his apparent birth father. But layered under it was a sense of wariness, of caution, small but stunning.

Jackson yanked back from Mulder's mind as he clambered up the steps and into the house.

---

Inside, Mulder bent over the couch, touching a gentle hand to Scully's head to wake her up. She'd been sleeping lightly lately, to the point where he was a little surprised the bang of the screen door hadn't woken her. She woke slowly, blinking sleepily as she sat up. He still held Lily in the crook of his arm, and Scully smiled and whispered, "Hey, sweetheart," and leaned in to kiss the top of her head.

"You get some rest?" Mulder asked, offering his free hand to help her up.

She took it but didn't stand, yawning. "A little. I'm still so tired. I'm so tired, Mulder."

"I know." He bent to kiss her forehead, squeezing her hand. "So someone dropped in a few minutes ago," he offered, shifting Lily to curl up against his shoulder. She was already getting sleepy again, her eyes lolling shut, and he figured they could put her down for a little while so they could eat. "And he brought some food."

Scully turned towards the kitchen and found Jackson, standing beside the counter. A grin spread over her face, to which he offered an awkward smile in return. "Hi, Jackson," she said, getting to her feet. "It's so good to see you."

She'd cried when they found him gone that morning. She'd been exhausted and hormonal, and probably still in pain, but she'd still cried. Finding the note he left had helped a lot—had seemed to cheer her up—but Mulder could still remember the hurt on her face when they found him gone again. Could feel the hesitance on her now, even as happy as she was. The same hesitance he had.

It made him feel guilty and horrible, the way he had when he'd felt this way at the beach—after everything he'd been through, everything he had missed with William, every moment he'd hated himself for letting him go, how could he ever hesitate at spending time with him? But then he thought of the things he had said in that beach house, the way Scully had burst into tears when he was gone, and the feelings only seemed to grow. He didn't want his son to leave—god, he didn't want that—but he did want things to be easy. He wanted Jackson to be theirs, really be theirs, and he didn't want to constantly be on edge, wondering when his son was going to up and disappear, or say something to hurt his wife. He wanted things to be simple, but he knew they probably wouldn't ever be.

But still, it was amazing to see him, as it was every time—would it never not be amazing to see his son, his grown son? He could tell Scully was overjoyed, even though her emotions were conflicting. And even as Mulder worried, it made him feel a little better when Jackson asked how Scully was feeling. Lily was nearly asleep, her fingers in her mouth, and so he took her upstairs to put her down and gave Scully and Jackson a moment to talk.

They didn't talk much over dinner; Mulder and Scully were both too exhausted to make much conversation. They ate in the living room, and Jackson found a channel that was airing horror movies in honor of the upcoming Halloween season, and Scully smiled. Mulder watched the two of them absently, the flickering light of the TV on their faces. They looked alike in this light; they had the same eyes, even if they were different colors.

Mulder got up to throw away the trash when they were done, taking the Styrofoam boxes and the crumpled napkins into the kitchen. "Oh, uh, I can help with that," Jackson said when he saw him, scrambling to his feet like he had something to compensate for.

"No, no, don't worry about it," said Mulder. "I've got it."

Jackson nodded and collapsed back into the chair, sagging into it. He seemed as uncomfortable as they were, fidgeting where he sat. As Mulder stuffed the boxes into the couch, he spotted his wallet on the counter, and his sleep-lacking mind seemed to remember: he should pay his son for the food. He retrieved two twenties and passed them to Jackson as he sat back down. "For the food."

"Thank you so much for bringing it," Scully added. "You didn't have to do that."

"It… was the least I could do," Jackson said, and he shoved the money back at Mulder, who shook his head.

"Take it, sweetie," Scully said, and Mulder could see her slight flinch. He knew she was trying to back off, trying not to suffocate him with unwanted mothering (her words), and he knew it was difficult. Of course it was difficult. "I-I know Burger King can't be paying you very much," she added quickly, trying to recover.

Jackson laughed, maybe a little uneasily, and tucked the money in his pocket. "They're not," he said. "Uh, thanks."

"Thank you," Scully said gently.

They sat in silence for a few more minutes, the Halloween score filling it, until they heard Lily wailing from upstairs. "That's my cue," Scully said with a little sigh, getting to her feet. "I'm heading to bed after I feed her." She leaned down to kiss Mulder goodnight.

"I'll be up in a minute," he said, squeezing her hand.

Scully nodded, turning towards the stairs. "Goodnight, Jackson," she added gently.

Jackson swallowed heavily, shifting in place. "Night, Dana."

As her footsteps retreated upstairs, Mulder turned to face his son. He was watching as Michael Myers stalked across the screen, his face lit up by the light of the television. His expression was as unreadable as always.

Mulder swallowed hard, hating himself for even asking the question, but knowing that he had to know for sure. He said, “So, Jack… how long do you think you’ll be here?” It sounded cruel to his ears, selfish and unwelcoming, and he was stricken with a sudden fear that these words were going to be enough to drive Jackson away.

Jackson didn’t look at him, but Mulder could hear a touch of discomfort in his voice when he said, “Uh, I have work on Sunday, so probably either tomorrow night or early that morning. You know.”

“Right,” said Mulder, his mouth dry, guilt clogging his throat. He had no idea how to navigate this, walk the line between protecting Scully’s feelings and trying to make his son feel welcome. He could try to reach out and risk getting hurt, or he could be distant and risk hurting Jackson, but really, neither option sounded very good. “Of course, you’re always welcome here,” he added in a rush. “I just… wondered…”

“Yeah, no, definitely,” Jackson said quietly. “It’ll be Saturday or Sunday, I can tell you for sure later.”

“Okay.” Mulder bit back a yawn, exhaustion overtaking him. “I-I’m going to bed. I apologize in advance if the kid keeps you up.” He tried to make his voice sound light and breezy, like he wasn’t upset. (He didn’t have any right to be upset.)

Jackson finally turned to look at him, the shadows of the darkening room hiding his eyes. “It’s okay. I don’t sleep a lot anyway.”

Mulder locked the door before he went upstairs, and it seemed to him that, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jackson throwing him a grateful look. It stuck out to him for some reason as significant, that Jackson seemed grateful that he was locking the door, but he was so tired, his mind foggy, that he barely had the energy to think about it.

He found Scully upstairs in bed, covers tucked around her, feeding Lily with pillows layered across her lap. (It was still fairly hot for October, but Scully managed to be cold in almost any form of weather.) “Hey,” he murmured, walking across the room to the dresser so he could change.

Scully yawned in reply. “Thank goodness she didn’t inherit your sleeping patterns,” she murmured, stroking the top of their daughter’s head. “She’s gone down so well every night, even if it doesn’t last more than a couple hours.”

“Most newborns spend the majority of their day sleeping,” Mulder said absently, pulling a t-shirt over his head. “Even Mulder newborns.”

She had a thoughtful sort of look on her face, looking down at the baby. “William never went down very easy,” she said softly. “I’d have to rock him… sing to him, talk to him… for what felt like hours.”

Mulder looked down at the floor, the rug he was standing on. He could still make out the patterns despite the dimness of the room, could still remember the day they’d picked this rug out. It was still hard to hear about everything he’d missed, even now, and even harder considering how the night had gone. “Maybe she’ll stay like this,” he commented to the floor.

“Maybe.” Scully’s voice was soft, not entirely unhappy, and when he looked up, she was smiling sleepily down at the baby.

He smiled, too, and went to sit on the bed beside her. Lily was nearly asleep, curled against her mother with her eyes half-closed, and he reached down to hold her hand in his, his head tipping forward until his cheek was resting against Scully’s shoulder. “I’ll give her a bottle when she wakes up,” he whispered. “You sleep.”

She snorted. “Easier said than done,” she said, but he heard the thanks in her voice. He sat up straight and pushed hair away from her face, behind her ear. She smiled a little again, turning her face into his palm. “How’s he doing?” she asked him softly.

“He’s okay.” Mulder swallowed hard, looking back down at Lily, snuffling in her half-asleep state. “He said he had work Sunday, so he’d leave tomorrow night or the next morning.”

“Okay.” Scully yawned again, wider this time. “That’s good to know.”

“Yeah.”

“He… He seems like he might not be as mad at us,” Scully said softly. When Mulder looked over at her questioningly, she added, “He… seems like he’s trying.”

“Yeah,” Mulder said again. He could see the note he had left last time still sitting on Scully’s bedside table, creased from being folded up.

“He genuinely seemed worried about me and the baby, when he came a few weeks ago.” Scully yawned once again, this time trying to talk around it. “And in the note… he thanked us…”

Lily was already asleep on Scully’s lap, so Mulder reached down to scoop her up, moving her to the crib. “We should get some sleep,” he whispered, moving back to lie down beside Scully, draping an arm over her shoulder. “I’m sure he’ll still be here when we wake up tomorrow.” He said it even though he wasn’t completely sure, even though he halfway expected to find the house empty besides them tomorrow, note or no note.

But in the morning, Jackson was still there, asleep sprawled out on the couch when Mulder went down to let Daggoo out. He felt shame twisting in his chest, and then relief, genuine relief. He was so relieved to find his son still there.

---

The day following was more or less uneventful—maybe more so than Scully would’ve liked. A part of her still felt the need to entertain Jackson, to convince him that, yes, it was worth it to have a relationship with them, past lending money and buying food. It was kind of a ridiculous line of thinking, considering that in the past, they hadn’t done much more than go get lunch or go down to the beach—and besides that, they were too exhausted for much else, and Jackson had always sort of done his own thing, anyway. But she still felt strangely guilty, like a parent of divorce who never saw their kid, for not having anything very interesting to offer her son.

Jackson seemed pretty okay with it, though. He ate the breakfast that Mulder made, and offered awkwardly to help clean up after. He took Daggoo for several long walks (runs, he called them, although Scully suspected that Daggoo’s little legs wouldn’t hold out for a long run), and found movies on TV for the three of them to watch. He borrowed Scully’s laptop and played some sort of game on it, which Scully might’ve minded in a different state of mind—she had a lot of idle research saved on there—but in this context, she couldn’t really bring herself to care. He offered to watch Lily after lunch, which Mulder seemed a little apprehensive about, but agreed to, either because he knew they both needed a break, or because he didn’t want to offend Jackson, or both. Scully felt a little guilty about it herself, as much as she relished the chance to get some rest. “Are you sure you don’t mind?” she asked gingerly, balancing Lily in the crook of one arm. She seemed as ready for a nap as they were, which boded well for Jackson, but it still seemed a bit odd to stick a teenager with a newborn. “She’ll probably just sleep the whole time.”

“Nah, it’s cool,” he said mildly. “I mean, what else am I gonna do?” He motioned to the TV and the computer.

Scully bit her lower lip and nodded, putting Lily down in the little bassinet thing they’d gotten for downstairs. “Just keep an eye on her,” she said. “If she wakes up, we’ve got bottles in the fridge, and diapers upstairs… Do you know how to change diapers?” she asked a little helplessly.

She was relieved when Jackson nodded, a little uncertainly. “We stayed with a friend of my mom’s who had a baby last summer, and I got put on diaper duty a couple times,” he said. “So I guess I’ve, uh, done it before.”

“Okay,” she said. “Well, uh, if you have questions or need help with anything, come right on up and get us.”

“Anything,” Mulder added. “We don’t mind.”

“Okay.” Jackson’s attention was halfway turned to the TV, but he nodded at them.

Mulder still seemed a little nervous at the prospect, which was understandable on Scully’s—it had little to do with Jackson, at least from her perspective, and more to do with the anxiety that came with Lily being with someone who wasn’t one of them; she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t feeling it a bit herself—but they still managed to get upstairs and crawl into bed. They slept for almost three uninterrupted hours, waking in the late afternoon and going down to find Jackson still on the couch, Lily’s bassinet pulled up beside him as he watched TV. “She, uh, she stayed asleep, mostly,” he said nervously when they came down, like he was worried they were going to be upset about something. “She woke up once, but she didn’t really cry, so I didn’t do anything. Was that right?”

Scully went to the smaller bassinet and scooped her daughter up, who had woken up at the sound of them coming downstairs and was beginning to whimper. “She looks fine to me,” she said, sitting down on the couch and easing Lily into the crook of one arm. “I think she’s probably hungry… Thank you for watching her,” she said to Jackson.

“We really appreciate it,” Mulder added. “We needed the rest.”

“Yeah, no problem.” Jackson got to his feet, saying, “She’s a good kid,” again, as if he wanted to remind them. He rocked back on his heels and added, “I’m gonna go upstairs for a while.”

“Okay,” Scully said. Jackson was disappearing up the stairs almost immediately then, not quite running, but not quite walking, either. “I guess the actual babysitting freaked him out a lot more than the concept,” she said to Mulder, reaching up to pull aside her shirt. She was surprised at how casual her voice sounded, like Jackson had always been their child, and he was reacting to a new sister with the typical behavior of older siblings.

“Probably.” Mulder sounded amused as she was. He leaned down to kiss her forehead. “I’m going to go pick up some dinner, okay? Subs sound okay to you?”

“It sounds excellent,” she said, already hungry—lunch seemed more like it was months ago then just hours. “Thank you.”

“Course.” He squeezed her hand before moving away, going to the counter to retrieve his keys before heading out the door.

The sudden quiet was almost relieving, and Scully reached down to change the channel on the TV as Lily began to feed. She still felt a little sleepy after her nap, well-rested, and she would be lying if she said she wasn’t happy about the prospect of a few minutes to herself. But before she landed on a channel she liked, a loud sound sliced through the air, seeming to echo through the rooms of their house and cinching tight around Scully’s chest.

Her first thought was gunshot, and she tensed in panic, pressing a hand over Lily’s head and hunching over protectively. Her mind was racing, searching for answers—Mulder, was Mulder okay, was Jackson?—and crying out in protest. Her heart was pounding so hard that she could barely hear Lily’s startled cries; she felt as if she couldn’t breathe. It took a few moments, and the rumbling sound of Mulder’s car, for her to process that it wasn’t a gunshot. His engine had backfired.

She readjusted her shirt with a trembling hand, getting to her feet and trying to shush Lily as she walked to the window and looked out. No sign of assassins at their doorstep, or soldiers on the lawn, just the back end of Mulder’s car rolling down the driveway. She took a shaky breath, and then another, pressing her lips to Lily’s head and whispering, Shhh, shhh again. Nothing to worry about, she was okay.

She was turning away from the window when she heard the next sound: thundering, frantic footsteps from above. Jackson was running towards, his feet pounding the floorboards, and before she could ask what was going on, she heard his voice, tight and frightened and booming. “Dana?” he bellowed. “Mulder?”

He stumbled to a stop at the bottom of the stairs, his eyes widening when he saw her standing by the window. He looked frantic, his hands balled into fists, his chin trembling, and Scully realized in an instant that she wasn’t the only one who’d heard a gunshot a few moments ago.

He was shaking, the way she had been a second ago, his face twisted with fury and fear, and he stammered out angrily, “A-a-are you…?”

“I’m okay,” she said quickly, remembering. (The shots, the bodies sprawled on the floor of a kitchen she’d never been in, but recognized from her dreams. The third gunshot from upstairs…) “We’re okay, we’re okay. I-it was just Mulder’s car backfiring.”

Jackson’s eyes widened in understanding, his limbs going limp as the panic left his body. “Oh,” he muttered, sagging in a chair, sprawling out and leaning his face forward in his hands.

Scully wanted to go and comfort him, but she didn’t know if he even wanted that from her. And besides, there was still Lily, screaming so loud it would be hard to talk with him. She began to rock her back and forth, whispering and shushing and humming under her breath. Lily began to calm, her sobs subsiding into hiccups. When she finally quieted, Scully went to sit on the couch, on the side closest to Jackson’s chair. “Are you okay?” she whispered.

Jackson seemed to have calmed, the fear and tension gone, but he still wasn’t looking at her. He still had his forehead in his hands. “I-I thought it was a gun…” he replied softly.

“I know,” said Scully. “I did, too.” She’d heard enough gunshots and threatening sounds to jump at a car backfire, she could still remember people breaking down her front door to come and kill her and Mulder.

Jackson’s voice was sharp when he spoke, like he was embarrassed. “I thought they were coming to—” He cut himself off abruptly, shaking his head hard, gritting his teeth. He looked towards another corner of the room, away from her. “Are they are going to fucking stop?” His voice sounded as if it was wrenched from his throat, raw. “Are they going to stop coming for me? Am I ever going to be fucking safe? Goddamnit!” He kicked the coffee table, hard enough to nearly topple it over, and it landed back in place with a bang.

Scully looked at Lily, worried the loud sound would startle her, but she still looked miraculously calm. Not on the verge of tears. She looked back to her son and saw tears welling in his eyes, shining in the light of the room. “I never wanted this for you, you know,” she said, her voice low. “Never. I… I wanted you to have a different life than this.”

Jackson laughed bitterly, thumping his foot softer against the coffee table. “Not your fault.”

“It is,” Scully said, a little bitterly herself, because she knew it was. She shifted her eyes to the ground. “It is, and I… I just want you to understand that—”

“No, it’s not,” he interrupted her, his voice stony and serious. When she looked back at him, he was looking back at her solemnly. Maybe angry or maybe reassuring, she couldn’t tell. But he was looking at her. “I know it’s not.”

It stunned Scully, just a little bit, because she had thought all this time that he blamed her, and she opened her mouth to reply, but he was still talking. “I… I shouldn’t have said that stuff at the beach,” he added, still in that sharp tone. Apologetic. “I shouldn’t have.”

Scully didn’t know what to say. They fell into silence, sitting side by side, Jackson leaned forward so his stomach was against his knees, and Scully shifting Lily against her. She seemed uninterested in eating now, her face buried in the side of Scully’s shirt, so Scully left her alone.

Jackson spoke first, finally, sitting up straight. “How’s the kid doing?” he asked, motioning to Lily. “Like, in general?”

Scully smiled a little. “Good. She’s good. She’s healthy.” She had her suspicions about Lily, that she was like Jackson—she’d found things shifted from where she’d left them, things out of place, and wondered—but she couldn’t be sure. And the concept didn’t scare her nearly as much this time as it had last time. It was still scary, sure, but not quite as scary. At least now they had some idea of what to do.

She saw Jackson looking at the baby, leaning towards them a little, and she asked carefully, “Do you want to hold her?” She had just realized that she didn’t think Jackson had held her yet; their interactions had been limited, and Jackson had indicated that he hadn’t really picked her up when they’d been alone.

Jackson looked very briefly terrified, but he nodded cautiously. Scully leaned down and set Lily gently in the circle of Jackson's arms. He was stiff and frozen in place, staring down at the baby like she was going to break. “I'm not very good with kids,” he said as Scully showed him how to cradle the head. He looked nervous, cupping her head with a large hand. “My mom's friend… she made me hold that kid, the one whose diapers I had to change, but he screamed the entire time I held him. I don't think kids like me.”

Lily yawned, a little smacking sound, her eyes half-closed. “She likes you,” Scully said in her reserved-for-babies voice, and resisted the urge to add, Your sister. Your sister likes you.

“Hmm.” Jackson was watching the baby. Scully heard the flicker of a word in Jackson's voice at the back of her mind, somehow silent—Hi—and Lily’s eyes slid closed contentedly. Scully thought that she must have heard him, too.

“I don’t want her life to be like mine,” he said finally, nudging her hand open with one finger. Lily yawned again. Scully nodded, understanding. Jackson looked up from his sister, meeting her eyes, and said in that same solemn manner, “I’m going to make sure it’s not.”

Scully nodded again. She reached out tentatively to touch her son’s arm, brushing her fingers over his forearm before pulling back, not wanting to overstep. “We both will,” she said.

They sat there in silence then, Scully and her children, clustered together in the living room until Mulder returned.

---

Jackson left the next morning, as he reminded them he’d do the night before. Once again, they found his bedroom empty in the morning. It still stung, just a little, but not nearly as much as all the times before.

---

If someone asked Jackson what the hell he was doing with his birth parents, he wouldn’t have been able to answer them. He didn’t entirely know himself. He’d been back and forth so much on whether or not he could have some kind of relationship with them that he was starting to confuse himself. He didn’t know what the hell he was doing, and he didn’t know why he’d said that stuff to Ginger that night. (Except that he kept thinking about the caution in Mulder’s mind when he’d shown up, about the hurt he’d felt from Dana when she’d said it was her fault that his life was so fucked up.)

He didn’t mean to keep in touch with them, but it just happened, and it happened mostly because of the kid. Because he wanted to keep in touch with her, even though she was still kind of a potato, and probably barely even knew he existed. But she was like him. He knew that she was like him, and he knew that she needed him, the way he had needed someone when he was a kid. Even if she had Dana and Mulder, who seemed surprisingly capable of taking care of her.

(It wasn’t that he doubted their parenting skills, but he also did. Of fucking course he did. No matter how sorry they were, they had given him up. But it was becoming more and more clear that they were capable, and probably had been capable of taking care of him. At least as capable as his parents.)

(The horrible, treacherous thought came to him one night, after waking up from a nightmare of white-masked doctors holding him back as he screamed and cried for his parents: maybe he would’ve been safer with Mulder and Dana. Maybe they could’ve protected him, if only because they knew what to expect. The idea made him nauseous and guilty, sick to his stomach, but it was strangely reassuring when it came to the potato. It made him think to himself, Maybe she’ll be okay. He and Dana had promised that she would be.)

But anyways, whatever the reason, the kid—Lily—was most of his motivation for going back. He wanted a sister, once, and he’d gotten one (another one, if you counted the little girl buried in California—which he couldn’t help but do). So he had to go back for her, if nothing else. That was, ultimately, the best reason for him to go back.

But aside from Lily, there seemed to be one other reason, if less significant than the first, to go back. It was the reason that he least wanted to acknowledge, but it kept coming up anyway. His mind kept lingering over that moment of slight recoil from Mulder. The hurt, the nervousness, the caution from them both. It shouldn't have bothered him—it was what he had wanted, after all—but for some reason, it did. Two more people to flinch away from him, to be afraid or resentful. It shouldn't have bothered him, but it did. It kept poking at him, a frequent jab in the back of his mind. You did it, asshole, you pushed them away. They hate you now. They don't want you there. He didn't think it was completely true, but he didn't want to fool himself. The emotions were there, even if they were small. And he couldn't quite let it go.

So he kept going back, if only because he couldn't quite help it. His apartment was too lonely, and sometimes, he got echoes of his sister's midnight wailing in the back of his head. He woke up one chilly Saturday in October, and knew immediately that it was Mulder's birthday, hearing a glimpse of Scully's voice. He tried not to think too much before he left, knowing only that he should go. He was on his way to Farrs Corner within the next hour and a half.

---

Jackson found Mulder at the house, halfway up the long, winding driveway, Daggoo at the end of a leash. He yipped excitedly and jumped at the car as Jackson pulled sideways onto the lawn and threw the car into Park.

Mulder shielded his eyes from the sun and smiled squintingly. "Jackson," he called out, lifting his hand in a wave.

"Hey," said Jackson, slipping out of the car and locking it behind him. He could tell without reaching too hard that the smile was genuine, cautious but genuine. He pulled back, crossing his arms over his chest, his shoulder against the car door. "Uh, happy birthday."

"Thank you." He smiled a little wider, letting up his grip on the leash a little so Daggoo could greet him, jumping at his legs. Jackson crouched to scratch his head. "We haven't heard from you in a couple weeks… how are you doing?"

"Oh, I'm, uh, fine," he said, mentally cycling through the habitual pleasantries he'd always kind of hated. "How are you guys? How's the kid?"

"We're good. Kid's good." The leash slipped out of Mulder's hand, and Jackson automatically scooped it up. "She's good at screaming," he added. "I keep telling Scully that she should try out for horror movies when she gets older."

"That must drive you crazy." Jackson scooped up Daggoo, holding him like a baby as he wriggled and barked excitedly. He didn't know how to look at Mulder, so he looked at the dog, letting him lick his face. The dog was almost worth the visit in itself; he would've gotten one of his own if it was at all practical.

He remembered, suddenly, why he was there, and put Daggoo down, feeling the obvious need to speak the reasoning out loud. "Uh, do you guys mind if I stay a couple nights?" he asked. (He didn't have to work until Monday.) "I could, uh, watch the kid some, give you guys some time to yourself… Date night or whatever," he added lamely, biting back a flinch.

Mulder chuckled. "I don't know about a date night, but… of course you can stay, Jackson. You're always welcome here."

I don't think that's true, he thought reflexively, and then remembered that Mulder could hear him now, sometimes. "Uh, thanks," he said, turning the leash over and over in his hands.

"Thanks for coming into town," Mulder said, and Jackson could feel guilt under the surface of his words, like he felt as bad about the whole situation as Jackson did. The two of them started walking down the driveway towards the house, Daggoo prancing in front of him. "I couldn't think of a better birthday than one spent with—" He cut himself off, chuckling nervously. "I-I'm sorry. I know that's corny."

"It is," Jackson said, and was relieved to hear Mulder laughing. He laughed, too.

They walked in silence for a few moments, their shoes stirring up dust from the driveway. The wind was blowing, stirring the long grass out in the field, and Jackson shivered, shoving his free hand in his pocket. He was trying to stay out of Mulder's mind, to not hear things he didn't want to hear, but the silence was almost unbearable, enough to make him uncomfortable, and he spoke on a sudden impulse: "Listen, I'm really sorry about what happened at the beach. W-what I said."

There was another pause after that, one that probably didn't last very long, but seemed to Jackson to last forever. He felt his face growing hot with embarrassment, and he kept his head down even as Mulder said, "You… you don't have to be sorry. If anyone should be sorry, it's—"

"I am," he said roughly, not understanding how his birth parents could still be so apologetic, so self-blaming, when he was the asshole. "I am sorry, and I at least owe you an explanation. I shouldn't have said that stuff." He balled his hand into a fist in his pocket, wanting to hit something and knowing there was nothing he could hit. He kicked a rock in the road instead. He was pissed off, and speaking without thinking, the words spilling out of his mouth. "Y-you remember those people a-at the beach house? Taking pictures? I guess they recognized you from that douchebag's web show."

Mulder laughed nervously, like he at least agreed that O'Malley was a douchebag. "Y-yeah, I remember."

Jackson sighed, kicking at another rock. He hadn't wanted to say this to them, but he didn't think he had a choice now. "I… I thought they were there for me," he said bitterly. "I thought they were with… the people who killed my parents." He felt tears welling up, his throat thickening, and he bit his tongue hard to stave them off. "Someone broke into my girlfriend's place about a month before that trip, and I thought it was because of me. And I… I didn't want what happened to my parents to happen again." He sniffled and tried to hide it, scrubbing at his face with one long sleeve. "I was going to stop coming around, to keep you guys safe," he admitted to his shoes. They'd stopped walking, and Daggoo was tugging at the leash, but he didn't know if he could move. "That was… kind of the last straw. I had to go, and I didn't want you coming after me. So I… I said that stuff to make sure you wouldn't."

There was a stunned sort of silence there. Jackson didn't look up, even as Daggoo coiled the leash around his legs, running around him eagerly. "Jackson…" Mulder finally started, his voice thick. He felt his birth father's hand on his shoulder.

"I couldn't do it, okay?" he snapped, and kicked the ground harder than he should have. "I know it wasn't the right thing to do, but I couldn't do that again. Not again. I… can't let anyone else die because of me." He sniffled again, biting down on his tongue harder. He hated crying; he was sick of it. He was regretting ever starting this.

"Jackson…" Mulder tried again, his voice faltering.

"That's why I came here after Lily was born, cause I thought something had come for you." Jackson chewed at his lip, staring hard at the top of his worn shoes. He needed to buy new ones. "But it wasn't real," he added. "The… the break-in was nothing, and so was the thing at the beach. I… I don't think it's dangerous. Anymore." He bit too hard and felt a burst of copper in his mouth that made him flinch. "But I shouldn't have done it, and I'm sorry. Okay?"

"Jackson, listen to me," said Mulder, in a voice so serious it made Jackson look at him, if only out of surprise. His expression was calm, understanding. "I understand the way you're feeling," he said. "Probably better than most."

Jackson bit his lip again instinctively, right in the sore spot. "Because they took your sister, right?"

Mulder nodded, and Jackson could feel decades worth of pain tightening like a knot in his head. "But it wasn't just her," he said. "Not-not exactly. They took her because my father made my mother choose, and I guess Samantha was the one she chose. So I guess it was because of me, but only indirectly. I don't blame anyone but my father and the bastards he worked with for Samantha." His face darkened a little, like it was hard to remember. "But there's plenty more to blame myself for."

Jackson swallowed hard. "Like what?"

"They murdered my father years later. I've always believed the motivation had to do with my inability to let things go. When my mother died, I thought it was murder, too. It wasn't, but—" His voice broke, and he looked away. "But the blame falls the most with me over… what happened to your mother. And what happened to you."

Jackson didn't know what to say to that. He looked back at the ground, at Daggoo's pleading face.

"I-I don't know how many times I pushed Scully away in an attempt to keep her safe," Mulder said, his voice lilting. "T-they kept hurting her because of me. To get to me. They killed her sister, which never would've happened if she hadn't been working with me. They did… countless things. And you…" His voice broke, trembling. "You were always in danger because of me. T-that's why I left less than a week after you were born. I wanted to keep you and your mother safe, and that seemed like the only way to do it. And look what happened." His voice was full of bitterness. "They didn't stop coming. You weren't any safer because of it. And I lost you because of it. Leaving didn't do a thing except make it worse."

Jackson didn't know what to say to that. He felt like he couldn't speak at all. He was gripping the leash too hard, his knuckles whitened with the effort, his head spinning. And then he felt Mulder's hand on his shoulder again.

"I'm not trying to hurt you, or to make this worse," he continued, his voice gentler now. "God knows I want more than anyone to leave this stuff behind. I just wanted you to know that I get it. I've been there."

Jackson cleared his throat once, twice, and looked up at him. His birth father. "What made it stop?" he asked, quietly.

Mulder squeezed his shoulder before letting go. "I used to think running away was the answer," he said. "But it's not. It may work, and it may amount to nothing, but either way… you run the risk of isolating yourself."

Jackson gulped, averting his eyes once again. Mulder patted his shoulder reassuringly. "I could've pushed your mother away a long time ago, and maybe she'd be happier," he said. "Or maybe she wouldn't. It's impossible to ask yourself questions like that; you'll drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out. But I know this: as much as I regret everything your mother has gone through because of me, I can't regret staying with her. Because I wouldn't have her. And I wouldn't have your sister, or you."

Jackson swallowed again, again, and spoke unevenly. "That… that is really corny, too, Mulder," he said, and offered a wobbly smirk.

He was relieved when Mulder laughed "You're right," he said. "And Jackson… I won't tell you what to do. But I will tell you this. I promise you, you don't need to protect us. You don't need to worry about it. That's not your job, okay?"

Jackson wrapped the leash around his palm, unraveled it. He mumbled, "Okay."

Mulder smiled, reaching out and taking the leash in his own hand. "Come on back to the house," he offered. "It's chilly out here."

"Sure." Jackson followed him down the road, walking slowly like he was reluctant, even though he didn't think he was. (He was… something. He couldn't put his finger on what.) "Only because I assume there's cake," he added, and Mulder laughed again.

---

They had dinner that night, a casserole that Dana claimed was the only thing she was good at cooking. (Mulder tried to tell her that wasn't true, and she replied with, "I'm going to remind you of the time you threw out that spaghetti because you thought it was old takeout, and a hazard.") They had the cake after, accompanied by a bad rendition of Happy Birthday, because Dana apparently couldn't sing, and Jackson knew he'd inherited that from her.

It was as corny as all that shit Mulder had said down on the driveway, and it hurt a little, because it reminded Jackson of nights he'd spent with his parents. But it wasn't bad. It was one of the first things he experienced with his birth parents that didn't make him want to run.

#sorry this took so long!!#xf rewatch #xf fanfic #i wrote this

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limewrites-archive · 5 years ago

Text

Time was really fucked with

Pairing: Sam Winchester X Reader

Warning: None?

A/N: (Based on Season 14, Episode 13. "Lebanon") This is literally just a 'what if' situation if Sam had a lover in Season 14.SPOILERS. IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THIS EPISODE YET, THEN PLEASE DO NOT READ. SPOILERS.

"Beer?"

You looked up, at the tall man you loved so much with a smile. "Always," you answered.

Your feet were kicked up on the small stack of books at the foot of your bed, your back against the soft pillows and in your comfiest hoodie. Sam handed you a can as he sat down next to you, making the bed dip for a second. You always loved watching something new with Sam, but tonight you both felt like watching a few classics. Sam wrapped his arm against you, pulling you close to him as you set your beer on the nightstand beside you. You both had a long day, Sam was still trying to figure out ways to keep Dean's mind off of Michael and you had just gotten back from a hunt earlier that day. You loved every moment with Sam, and wouldn't trade anything in the world for him, after all, you and Sam had been in love for years. Off and on because of the multiple times the world was threatened, deaths and such, but fate made it work. You woke up on his chest, feeling his chest rise and fall. You checked the clock on the wall as you gently pulled away from the sleeping man under you. "5:12... of course." Sam usually would wake up around 5 am-ish to get his day going. He'd recently been a leader of sorts for the other dimensional people that they saved from their war. They moved into the bunker, and Sam has been teaching them the ropes to our world. Lately, his daily routine has been waking up, get ready, make something small for himself to eat, make some check-ins with the hunters that are on hunts, and then take care of whatever business that he has to. That could mean doing research for the hunters, finding cases or just going out to get groceries and doing laundry. Sam and Dean had told you that their hunter friend had been murdered last week, and there were some pretty valuable things that had gone missing from his house. Dean had been working on finding who killed and took whatever, and he was sure that he knew who did it. Sam had told you this last night, and you were sure that this was his daily business today.

Soon enough, Sam started to wake up as you were getting dressed. "I thought I was the one who gets up early?" he said with his raspy morning voice. "Not today, hon," you buckled your belt and turned to fully face him, "I'll get in on check-in's this morning. Maggie starts at 8, as always and she does a lot when you aren't here. The best I can do for her and you are to get most of your calls done so she doesn't have to do one more thing on her list", you insisted. He groaned, sat up and stretched. "Thanks. I'd better go check on Dean to see if he's ready to go. We have to go get back the skull of Sarah Good," he ran a hand through his hair, you moved to the doorway. "Let me know when you're leaving, okay Sam?" he nodded, sleepily. You quickly ran and gave him a kiss on the cheek, "love you!" and ran out the door.

"It's a pearl that grants wishes"

Now was the time that Dean needed to make the wish. The wish, that would get rid of Michael. Dean held the pearl in his hand and wished. The bunker lights dimmed and then turned red. Sam and Dean were attacked, and when the lights turned back to normal, a man held a shotgun pointed at Dean. John Winchester stood in front of the two boys. Time had been messed with, Sam knew that for sure. Dean pushed Sam to let the night last with his mom, dad and them all together but Sam knew this would not be the best end result. The two decided to go out for groceries, Sam just walked down the streets, viewing shops and finally making it to the grocery store. Sam tried calling you as he was walking through the store, but your cell was disconnected. "Odd, it was working fine yesterday," He muttered to himself. He tried all of your phones, and one finally worked. "Hey! I can't pick up the phone right now but make sure to leave a message!" Sam realized that your voice mail was different. Usually, it would say "Out on a hunt, leave a message and I'll call back ASAP". Even so, Sam decided to leave a message. "Hey, uh- I see you changed your voicemail- and turned off all your other phones. You're not going to believe what happened- Call me back" and clicked off his cell. He held his phone in his hand, looking at it, and decided to call again as he entered a new isle. He noticed, as he was calling, a woman with two kids was having a hard time calming them down as she tried answering the phone. One kid was maybe 2 years old, while one was maybe 10 or 11. She finally answered the phone, and Sam heard from his end and in front of him, "Hello?" Sam didn't know what exactly was going on, and all he managed to say, was "Uh....um..". The 11-year-old was holding a box of mac and cheese but saw Sam staring "Mommy, that tall man is looking at us," the woman turned around, seeing Sam. Sam quickly hung up and put his phone away.

Time really was fucked with, Sam thought to himself. You smiled at Sam since it had been such a long time ago since you last saw him. "Sam? It's been forever. How are you?" you moved the cart that held your two-year-old and your oldest followed behind you. Sam couldn't help but stutter. He was in so much shock, he felt like it was a bad dream. "I get it been 12 years since I saw you- and yeah I put on some baby weight- but not even a proper hello?" Sam mentally slapped himself, and pushed out the words, "Hey, um, Hello. You have kids-" he was more surprised about that than anything. You said you never would want to have any kids while you were living the life of hunting, and he came to the realization that you were no longer hunting. It was 11 years of you not hunting. You pat your 11-year-old's head, "Yup. Proud of them too. You look like you just saw a ghost. Are you okay?" Sam knew that time needed to be fixed soon, at this point. You weren't together, she had kids with someone else, everything felt so wrong, and on top of it, Sam saw the ring you were wearing. "Married..good for you... When was the last time we saw each other?" Your happy expression was turning into a worried one, you turned to your child, "Go and get me some paper towel rolls okay hon?" the child ran off, and you spoke to Sam. "Well, 12 years ago, It's all pretty foggy, but you were looking for your dad," Sam remembers that very clearly. That was the start of your relationship with him. Shit happened, and eventually, you kept popping up again and again. Then magically, after years there you were. To last night, when you were watching movies with Sam, helping around the bunker. "Oh yeah, right... Well, um, I gotta go." Sam darted off to the self-checkout and left. He eventually found Dean, and they saw the changes that were being made because of the wish. Dean was one of the most wanted criminals, and Sam pursued law and even had a TEDTalk. Sam and Dean got back to their bunker, after realizing that after the dinner with their mom and dad, after everything that was crazy that day, it was time to set their time right. Sam crushed the pearl, the same one that made everything change. Their dad was gone. The bunker went quiet for a second, and then the bunker door opened. "Ugh, what a day. You'd think there'd be fewer vampires now every time will take out a nest but they just keep popping up," you said as you heaved a bag of weapons down the stairs. Sam looked in amazement. You were back, the same you as the start of the day. No extra baby weight, no ring on your finger, though Sam just realized he might have to change that, and you were together. It's as if nothing had changed. He was glad the pearl fixed things when it broke. Sam ran to the bottom of the staircase waiting for you. "Someones happy to see me," you smirked down at him as you continued your way. You noticed that his face had marks and that his eyes were puffy. He'd had a rough day. You tossed the bag to the bottom, and quickly stepped all the way down to Sam. You wrapped your arms around him and gave him a big hug. He didn't say anything for a while, but he enjoyed holding you in his arms.

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storiesbyjes2g · 5 years ago

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Penelope Flemming (aka, “Penny Pizzazz”)

Penny is an Internet personality and lives in San Myshuno with her longtime boyfriend, Sven Oppenheimer. She is the older sister of up-and-coming movie star Kayla Flemming and Maya Pruett’s BFF.

Background

Penny was born to Patrick “Pat” and Sarah Flemming. She lived a complicated life as an only child for about half her life. Sarah was an aspiring actress. Her pursuit of fame caused her to be in and out of Penny’s life throughout her childhood. Sarah had a best friend named Samantha (“Sam”) who took care of Penny and Pat while she was away at her request. Penny liked Sam well enough, but she was no substitute for her mother. As Penny neared her teenage birthday, her mother’s absence loomed over the Flemming residence like a dark shadow. Sam came around more often to help keep the gloomies away, she said. Penny could take care of herself, and Pat didn’t need help either, but Sam practically lived there. Penny never suspected a thing until Sam turned up pregnant, and Pat explained what had been going on. She was hurt though she understood how it could happen. Her mother acted like she didn’t care for them, but they were still married. Sarah came home a few weeks after the announcement. Penny hid in her room as they fought. The next morning, Sarah told Penny she was leaving for good.

Teenage life was rough as she adjusted to all the emotional changes that came with being a teenager on top of dealing with her parents breaking up, not being the only child anymore, and learning to let Sam back in. They used to get along, and Penny liked her a lot, but she pulled away when her mother left. Sarah didn’t contact Penny much which left a hole in her life. If she got famous, maybe Sarah would notice and contact her. That’s when she named herself Penny Pizzazz and started her YouTube channel; becoming an actress was too much work and so 90s. The channel was successful quickly, and by the time she graduated, she already had a job lined up with the hottest streaming media company in the industry. They wanted her to take the skills she used to build her channel and help them with their social media. For a while, she enjoyed it and was very successful. She got the fame she wanted, but Sarah never contacted her and got a lot of negative press about the bad habits she fell into. Coincidentally, the company—Sim.tv—began imposing on Penny’s life. After a few promotions, she became the face of the company, and they wanted her to look a certain way, watch where she went and who she hung with. The pressure crushed her. Around this time, she met Maya Pruett.

They knew of each other from Simstagram but never met. One afternoon, they ran into each other in San Myshuno and clicked immediately. There was something special about Maya. They got close quickly, and she felt like they had known each other all their lives. She admired her because she was such a free spirit like she used to be. Between hanging out with her, struggling to forgive Pat and Sam, struggling with feelings of abandonment still, and the pressure at work, Penny decided she needed to stop worrying about everyone else and do what’s right for herself. The first thing she did was cut her hair. She always wanted to go natural, but the network frowned upon it. At first, they tried to go with it, but she lost the “aesthetic” they were looking for. They couldn’t fire her without a lawsuit, of course, so they reassigned her back to the social media department. Coincidentally, Maya got promoted and took her position shortly after; she got her a job months prior. Maya was ecstatic and more than glad to do what Penny was not willing to do, and she was glad for her.

(Read more about Penny’s life under the cut!)

The months following were transformative. She took time off to do some soul-searching and let go of the past. She forgave her parents and Sam, reconnected with her little siblings, quit her job, and got back to her YouTube channel. Her audience was so glad to have her back and loved the new Penny. She did vlogs about being your authentic self and tips on how to find true happiness. But, Penny will always be Penny and give her audience the 411 on the hottest happenings and spots in San Myshuno.

Maya was the best friend Penny ever had. Throughout their friendship, they met new friends and had a nice group of people to hang and party with. All Penny wanted was to have fun with people she liked. But naturally, some people in the group began pairing up. While she was happy for them, she didn’t trust that she was cut out for it. One such pairing was Sven and Logan.

Penny thought he was funny and had a cute accent being from Windenburg and all, but that was it. She was happy for them and thought nothing of it. But, they’re little romantic experiment didn’t work out. Penny was closer to Sven than Logan and called to check on him one day. They had dinner and caught up. Something strong brewed between them, and Penny was not ready for it. She went home confused. They were friends, and he just broke up with someone. And, he wasn’t her type. For a while, she tried to deny what she felt, but soon she couldn’t deny it anymore. Still, she remained guarded. After all, she was the rebound. Or, so she thought. Sven eventually gathered the courage to share his feelings. He had a thing for her for a while and only went out with Logan because he knew Penny wasn’t interested. He called it off because it wasn’t fair to Logan. Learning this lifted a burden off Penny’s shoulders. She wasn’t the rebound! Logan was...kinda.

When the news of their relationship spread, things were awkward between the three of them whenever the group hung out. Logan never did or said anything to Sven or Penny, but she didn’t have to. It was all in the way she looked at him. Penny knew she was still hanging on and was not comfortable being around her.

They stepped away from the group. This began a domino effect within the group. Another friend had recently gotten married and stopped hanging out too. Maya met Ranveer and saw them less. It was just a matter of time before they drifted apart. They were all close in age and at the point where everyone began planning their futures and wanted to find that special someone.

Penny has not maintained friendships with anyone except Maya; it felt like playing with fire. She and Sven are loving their new life together and are planning their own future. She has a feeling he’s gonna propose soon!

Personality & Fun Facts

Penny is a city girl through and through. One day, she’ll leave the city to start a family, but San Myshuno will always be home in her heart.

She loves a good party and a strong drink. That’s kind of how she and Maya bonded initially. Her drink of choice is Dim & Gusty, and she can’t understand how Maya downs those sweet, fruity drinks. She says they are girly girly just like her.

Speaking of girly girly, Penny wouldn’t describe her style as girly. She would say it is tastefully feminine and chic.

Penny has always been a small woman, but she can put away some food and loves a good steak and a glass of good red wine.

Traditionally, her favorite color has been black, but as of late she’s been enjoying lighter, fresh colors like sage, lavender, and khaki. Maya tells her it’s because she let love into her life.

She loves a good, cheesy romance flick which is just another thing she and Maya connected on.

Here are some little known facts about Penny: She loves to cook. She also is a closet geek and loves video games and programming. and mainly uses her programming skills to make little apps and plug-ins to make her life easier. She’s also very funny and once thought about being a comedian but her days of being in a physical spotlight are over. She enjoys being Internet famous and the mostly private life she gets to enjoy.

#3D Pruetts #3D catch up #delicious dishes & dreams #penny pizzazz

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soulflamesketches · 5 years ago

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Almost a Mirror (Short Story)

Summary: A lone human crash survivor is found by a race of aliens known as the Kakoreans and brought in for recovery. They wake up under their care, cautious but curious of the room and world around them. The survivor is visited by the one that discovered them often. Over time, Elion grows on the human. Turns out Humans and Kakoreans aren't that different.

Feedbacks and reblogs are always appreciated!

~~~

Kakoro (Ka-Ko-rou) - Referring to the Planet.

Kakoreans (Ka-Ko-rou-ree-ins)- Species on the Planet Kakoro.

Elion (El-ee-on) - Character Name.

Serephant (Sarah-fant) - Referring to the Aquatic variety of Kakoreans.

Saharamph (Se-ha-ra-emph) - Referring to the Desert variety of Kakoreans.

Draykle (Dray-kel) - Referring to the Arctic variety of Kakoreans.

Wyrmtain (Worm-tain) - Referring to the Mountain variety of Kakoreans.

Alphein (Al-fein) - Referring to the Planetary capital of Kakoro

~~~

The crash was a scattering of fragments in my head. A blur that I couldn’t focus on. The details in my memory resurfaced when ‘they’ found me. Now, here I am. Sitting on a comfortable bed, like the ones back in the hospitals of Earth. Perhaps a little bigger to accommodate the natives. The natives ‘here’ were far more common than a stray human being like me. This WHOLE event was not what I expected - maybe I watched too many alien movies as a kid.

You tell me: what do you predict would happen if aliens found you as the lone survivor? If you watched all those Hollywood movies, you might expect to be experimented on. Even probed. This would not be the case. These… aliens simply brought me ‘here,’ wherever ‘here’ is. ‘Kakoro’ was the name given to me, albeit hesitantly, when I enquired the whereabouts of my present location.

Knock! Knock!

A small shriek escaped my throat as I leapt into a sitting position. “Careful!” Yelled a voice from the entrance. Too late, the pain shot through me like the static shocks my brother used to attack me with as kids. He would rub his socks on the carpet, before proceeding to poke me with his finger, sending a zap of currents along my skin. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I even knocked this time!” Panicked the alien as she rushed over to me.

Oh yeah, that’s Elion. According to the doctor alien, she was the captain of the group that found me. She’s been visiting me ever since she brought me here. I’m still unsure of how to react while she’s with me. I’m still unsure of how to describe her, I’ve seen so many differences between them: Different types of scales, different appendages like wings and fins...

“I know, I know…” I growled with grit teeth, clenching my side. My grip slowly released when Elion placed her hands gently on my back and arm. The hand on my back rubbing in small circles. Just like Dad did whenever I scraped my knee, except I was tense here. “You better hope you didn’t pull your stitches,” Elion warned, lifting the fabric covering it to check.

All I could do was stare at her while she observed my wound. Most of her body was covered in small green and blue fish-like scales, all varied in their tone and shade. Pink skin emerged from the scales to make her underbelly and the bulk of her face. When I asked, they told me that she was part of the aquatic variants of the entire species. Hence why she had fin-like appendages on her back, hands and ears. Seeing Elion’s ‘unique’ features were hard to process - especially with high school biology classes failing to teach about alien life forms.

“Alright, you’re fine.” Elion’s voice broke my train of thought and my stare as I sheepishly looked away, silently hoping she didn’t notice my actions. “Sorry again.” She quickly added, her finned ears folding down like a hurt puppy. With a sigh, I placed a hand on her head, softly ruffling her short brown hair. “Stop apologising. I was in my own little world anyway,” I dismissed, offering her a small smile. She smiled in return, gently holding my wrist.

“Besides that little scare, how are you feeling?” She asked while letting go of my wrist, which I returned to rest upon my lap. “Alright, I guess? I still can’t get out of bed and I haven’t talked to anyone about the crash or my crew,” I tried to explain only to become jittery as I went. “I feel like I’m stuck - Which I am! I can only sit here! I don't have any input in the situation.” My head hung, my throat tightened while I frustratedly ranted to her.

“Give me a moment, I’ll be back, promise!” Elion said, dashing out of the room, the claws on her feet making small ‘tik tak’ sounds as she went.

Great, now I’m alone with my thoughts again. Another sigh left me as I shifted to lay down again, only for Elion to jump back into view with a dramatic exclamation of “I’m back!” before I could move an inch. I couldn’t help but chuckle at her, to think that I was terrified of this goofball when I first saw her. Eli grinned, seeming proud of the results she got. “Look at this! She can laugh!” Her laughter joined my own at our exchange. It’s like we were old friends from Uni.

Seemingly floating by her side was a transparent tablet screen that most of the official personal carry with them. I can only assume the purpose of the tablets. Taking her place at my side again, the tablet moved smoothly as it followed her and came to rest in her field of vision, she swiped across the tablet screen to summon a keypad containing the letters of their language. “You mentioned you were with a company, do you know where they are? I can attempt to contact them.”

“Really? I thought only an official could handle that,” My eyebrows knitted together as I questioned her, but she only smiled smugly “Dear little human, I am an official!” Eli declared, “Now what sector?” She questioned again. She tapped the keys in rapid succession with my words, her small claws making a small tap noise, much like the claw on her feet before. A galactic map appeared on the screen, zooming into the sector she typed, more notes in their language appearing on the side.

“And... there they are. This is the right ship?” Eli grabbed the tablet from the air and held it out to me. How the hell was this thing floating before!? It’s heavy! The screen then displayed the U.S.S. Victoria, the docking station that brought us all here. “Yeah, that’s it.” A sense of relief washed over me, glad that they were still there. The crash must have sent them into a frenzy, probably about the paperwork involved rather than finding me. “Fantastic! I’ll take this to the main com and we can call them over!”

I smiled. This was all going smoothly, was their whole planet like this? Were the others like this? I certainly hope so. I haven’t had a fun talk with anyone since I started my job. Everyone was so laser-focused on the job like their chairs had sticks to go up their asses. But Eli was so loose like her job was just second nature to her.

“Get some rest, I’ll be back tomorrow and I’ll even help you out of the bed, how does that sound?” Eli asked, wrapping her long arm around my shoulders. “Sounds like I’m an old lady who needs her walking stick,” I sighed, hitting her hand away when she reached up to pinch my cheek “You kinda do, squirt. I’ll see you tomorrow,” With that, she left my room. For once, I didn’t feel uncomfortable being in this room that was obviously too big for me. It felt like I fit right in for once…

~~~

“Wakey, Wakey, sleepyhead” I heard a sing-song voice above me while I shifted under the warm sheets. After a few more moments of refusing to move, Eli sighed and started poking me in the shoulder. “Come on, I know you’re awake. I can hear your thoughts.”

Jesus, it was like being woken up for school by mum every morning. Wait, did she just say she could hear my thoughts? “Yes, I did. Now get up. Let’s get you ready!” Eli laughed, now patting my shoulder. I opened my eyes to look up at the excited Kakorean. “What’s with the wake-up call? What time is it?” I inquired as I sat up in bed, rubbing my eyes clear of sleep.

“Uh, Earth time? About 9:30 in the morning.”

Well, at least it wasn't as early as I got up for work, which was 6 am every morning even if it was a weekend. We were barely given time off since we were stuck on the ship. Elion clapped her hands together before rubbing them together excitedly, like a villain from a James Bond movie. “Let’s get you dressed, I’m taking you out.”

“Wait, ‘out’? Where?” Fatigue seemed to disappear. Now, she had my attention and I was the excited puppy in the situation. Eli laughed again, ruffling my hair. “Outside! You’ve been in this room for too long. Time to explore!”

Eli proceeded to help me shift to the edge of the bed even though I didn’t need that much help. It wasn’t my legs that were injured. But it was the thought that counts, right? Well, apparently I was wrong, cause pain still shot through my side when I tried to walk. Thankfully Eli caught me whilst scolding me to be more careful.

“Can I get a wheelchair in here please?” Eli called out into the hallway. Said object was promptly brought over to her and I was placed onto the seat like a baby placed in its stroller. The seat size was not that much bigger than me, which was surprising.

After we both thanked the nurse, Eli guided the wheelchair out of the room. As we travelled through the hallways, I took in everything I could see. Mainly the people. Doctors, patients and visiting friends or family. The atmosphere was so warm, much warmer than the hospitals of Earth. I was hard to explain it as more than just that, but it felt like it deserved a Shakespeare length monologue to describe it.

Exiting the hospital, the light was initially blinding compared to the inside lights, I covered my eyes for a moment before peeking out again once my eyes had adjusted to the light. I sighed in content after I took in a breath of fresh air. “Don’t go falling asleep now, we’ve barely left the building,” Eli teased while she giggled.

“Welcome to Alphein. The capital of Kakoro.”

The city before me felt like the city of Melbourne in size, maybe it was even bigger, this planet is full of surprises after all. Some Kakoreans flew to their destination overhead while those without wings continued on the ground. “So some can fly and some can’t?” I asked curiously, looking over my shoulder to Eli as she pushed the wheelchair onto the path, joining the crowd.

“Yep. There are fours subspecies on our planet. After a continental divide millions of years ago, we had to evolve the different climates. Those lads flying overhead are most likely the Wyrmtains or the Mountain Kakorean. They evolved in the Hydran Peaks.” Eli pointed upwards to them as she explained.

Then she gestured to another winged Kakorean, but unlike the light-skinned Wyrmtain, this one had dark skin and sand coloured scales upon their skin. “They are a Saharamph, they evolved in the desert. The first Alpha was a Saharmph.” And she continued on like this about the last two subspecies.

The Draykle were the Arctic variety. They didn’t have wings or long ears, they were big and fluffy because they were built for the cold and often needed to trim when they had to spend some time in another region of the planet.

Last but not least were the Seraphant, or the Aquatics, just like Elion. Lean and strong to swim through the seas and a lot of fins.

“What’s an ‘Alpha’?” I raised an eyebrow. “A Leader. The leader of our species and our planet. There’s a long story behind the unification of our whole species and planet, it’s basically legend now.” Eli responded, her brown eyes nearly sparkling as she spoke. Like a child hearing their favourite bedtime story for the umpteenth time but was never tired of it. “I actually know the current Alpha. Deru’s a good friend of mine.”

“Oh really?”

“Yep! Now, enough about here. Tell me about the Earth. I’ve only been there once for a mission but that was in the ocean.” Eli stopped the wheelchair at a cafe table just before a beach. The view was beautiful. Sparkling crystal seawater trying to reach further and further up the coastline, but always stopping at the same point. Other Serephants young and old were playing on the beach or resting in the tidal water.

Eli sat on the seat across from me on the table, looking at me eager to hear what I had to say. “What do you want to hear about?” I asked, feeling like I was put on the spot. It was such a broad question that I didn’t know where to begin. “Anything, really. How about your childhood?” She suggested, trying to clarify what she was looking for.

I hummed, running a hand through my hair as I thought about my answer. “A typical day that I can recall would be during school holidays. My brother and I would just play outside for most of the day, only coming inside when mum told us to. Which was for food and then bed. I remember for lunch we had fish fingers a lot, mostly because it was the easiest thing to cook while also needing to watch us. Just put them in the oven to heat up,” I chuckled, remembering the laziness of mum in the past. I’d be the same though if I’m being honest.

“‘Fish Fingers’?” Eli tilted her head. “But Earth fish, from my research, do not have fingers. The only aquatic being with fingers on Earth is the…. Uh, the…. Damnit, what’s it called?” She tapped her temple lightly but furiously as she tried to find the word. She then snapped her fingers “Axolotl! That’s it!” She grinned, proud that she remembered the word.

Another chuckle escaped my throat while I took a moment to look over the scenery once more. The beaches were clean, without a spec of garbage. I wonder what the reefs were like under the waves, maybe it was like the Great Barrier Reef back home. Probably much more gorgeous ever since the reef started to decay a few years back. Maybe Earth could have been like this planet if we weren’t so careless.

Returning to Eli, I explained “They weren’t actual fingers, Li. They were called that because of their shape. They were just made of fish. Different types depending on the brand you got.” The kakorean nodded, acknowledging everything she was hearing. Her smile widened and she giggled to herself. “What is it?” I inquired, raising a brow at the alien.

“If they’re made out of fish, can I turn my brothers into fish fingers?” Eli leant against the table, nearly doubled over in laughter. I covered my mouth, trying to hold in the laughter that Elion wasn’t even trying to. Reminds me of the time I wished my brother was chop liver when he was an annoying tyke. “Does that make you the third fish finger then?” I teased with a smirk. Eli looked at me with feigned offence, a hand placed over her chest as if she was holding her heart.

Then, as if on cue, a scaly arm wrapped around Eli’s head, catching the female in a headlock while she struggled, trying to push the face of her assailant away. “Hey, sis! This the human you were talking about?” The aquatic male had a similar scale pattern to Elion, similar short brown hair and brown eyes. Must be one of the brothers she mentioned.

“Remi! Let go of me! Or I swear on the Alpha’s name, I will--” Eli was snapping at the male while still trying to shove away. But I was pulled from listening by a tap on my shoulder. On my other side was another aquatic male, but he looked just like the other one that was bothering Eli.

“Hello! I’m Tate, it’s lovely to meet you,” He held out his finned hand for a handshake, which I shook as I introduced myself in return. “We heard that she was taking for a walk and we just had to come by!” He grinned the same toothy grin as Eli. They like cheeky buggers, just like my own brother.

Tate and I looked back at Remi and Eli as they continued to squabble. Being out here felt like a day out with friends. I haven’t had that in a long time. These fish fingers made me feel like this was home. I could stay here forever...

~~~

“Tell me if you’re in pain, cause I’ll stop right away and let you rest-”

“Eli! I’m fine, just don’t let go of me please,”

“Only if you promise not to be too sweaty, we wouldn’t want you to slip,” The Aquatic Kakorean smirked, holding my hands securely as I gripped her scaled hands in return. “Oh, shut up!” We laughed as she slowly pulled me up from the bed. I was on my own two feet again, back in my uniform once again. They were waiting outside, it was time to leave Kakoro. But part of me didn’t want to. In the days after contacting the ship, Eli took me out of my room and taught me about the planet.

I met many people here, from all corners of the planet. Other Aquatics, Desert, Mountain and Arctic Kakoreans - or Serephant, Saharamph, Draykle and Wyrmtain as Eli explained. It was just like Earth’s nationalities. I’m glad Eli was the one to find me.

“Alright I’m steady,” I stated, but I still held onto Eli’s hand as she walked me out of the hospital. Doctors nodded and smiled as we passed them which I returned no problem. Exiting the building, a shuttle was positioned among the Kakorean ships nearby. Human officers standing alongside Kakoreans, stiffly standing by with them. They looked just as uncomfortable as I was when I first got in. “Officer, thank god you’re alright!” Peggy smiled when she saw me, stepping forward to hug me, but stopped when she looked up at Eli. Noticing her gaze, Eli let go of my hand and nudged me forward.

Peggy then hugged me tightly, I returned the embrace, but my focus was on Eli. Her knitted brows and lowered ears. “Come now, officer. Let’s get you home” My higher-ups ordered, the rest of the group returning to the ship. “One-second sir,” I said, turning to my friend. She was still looking away, the male Arctic Kakorean next to her - Named Dante - rubbing her shoulder comfortingly. I hugged her, catching her off guard. “What… what are you doing?” She stuttered, a pink hue dusting her cheeks.

“Saying goodbye to my friend,” I muttered, giving her a gentle squeeze as I rested my head on her chest. The soft beating of her heart next to my ear. Eli returned the embrace just as tightly, nuzzling her face into my hair.

“You should come to visit sometime, my friends on Earth would love you,” I told, certainty in my voice as I stepped out of the embrace on my way to the ship to join my species. Eli’s ears bent down sheepishly as she scratched her cheek “I doubt I’d fit in, squirt.” She smiled sadly, raising her hand to wave at me. I grinned as I spoke my next words, also said with certainty. It caused her brown eyes to widen, surprised at my words before she smiled softly in return. They glistened with what appeared to be tears.

“Trust me, Fish Fingers! You’d fit right in!”

#Original short story #original story #original female character #unnamed female character #Kakoreans #Ejderhalar #Original content #Kakoro #human lone survivor #human female character #female alien character #alien/human friendship #empathy #not so short story #i tried to make it short #really didn't work

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lookwhatilost · 5 years ago

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i finished my second watch of bojack s6 p1 and here’s a predictably massive post of some thoughts/observations abt it

spoilers under the cut obviously

the “fuck” of the season definitely came in a moment that i didn’t expect, but i rly liked how it was used. like, it was a callback to when gina dropped it in the last season –– something that traumatized her vs a reaction to her PTSD symptoms. a lot of people seem unhappy w it but i think it’s more powerful than people are giving it credit for being

the gatsby reference in e3 rly brought to mind that there are, like, a lot of gatsby tie-ins w this show and i never rly pasted them together mentally bc of the ubiquity of the “rich guy is utterly depressed and alone” trope. like, the imagery related to the pool, the shallow parties, the yellow car, the spacious but empty house, the billboards staring him down as he drives when he’s hallucinating in s5. charlotte/daisy being a weak parallel in that he had feelings for her when they were younger, held onto them for years, only for her to be married when they reconnect, but it’s worth mentioning that the glow stick balloons were green.

someone on reddit pointed out that jameson’s baby in e1 had physical traits associated w fetal alcohol syndrome. like, short, upturned nose, eyes that are far apart, and low ears. it’s hard to say if it’s intentional, but he’s drawn w a lot more detail than a lot of the other babies i’ve seen in the show. if it’s purposeful, like, that’s amazing attention to detail

i liked how the season opened on a planetarium flashback, because honestly, the immediate aftermath of sarah lynn’s death is definitely kind of glossed over in s3 when it initially happens. and though i suppose the added information isn’t terribly surprising (like him lying abt the events that lead up to her overdose and minimizing his own role in it as much as possible), it did make me wonder why i hadn’t thought abt it before

bojack rly does show signs of serious growth in the 6th season and it’s cool to finally see him move forward w/o simultaneously backsliding in other ways. a lot of his good actions in previous seasons were only rly things that benefitted him. and there are a lot of examples of it, but i think the one that stuck out to me the most was w his therapist. when he fell off the wagon, it’d have been rly easy for bojack to look the other direction and walk away like we’ve seen him do before. realistically, he has no real incentive to care for doctor champ’s wellbeing if he’s no longer staying at pastiches, but he checks him into rehab anyway, and when doctor champ throws his insecurities in his face to be hurtful, he immediately identifies it for the petty jab it is instead of letting it fuel his negative thoughts and using it as an excuse to dive into self-destructive behavior. honestly e6 was the emotional high water mark of part 1, even though it wasn’t the kind of gut punch that the dramatic, narrative focused episodes of bojack tend to be

i’m glad that the writers finally /did/ something w todd that made him feel like an actual character instead of jst a device for the comedy part of the show. i used to watch this show w a friend and we always used to say that todd had very little depth given the amount of screen time he occupies and seeing them move away from that was refreshing. his struggle w jorge is very relatable as someone whose parents have always pushed me towards things i didn’t sincerely want based on their expectations and desires for me vs my actual opinions of what success and happiness would look like for myself. but, on the other side of the coin, there’s finally a little bit of confrontation of the fact that todd’s erratic behavior and shenanigans are very taxing things for people who care abt him to deal w. and todd is rly the only character who’s somehow defied the show’s formula in that he never faces accountability for the things he does. like, he’s enabled PB’s impulsivity many times and drove him to bankruptcy, care of PB Livin’, and it’s a detail in the show that’s never truly been acknowledged or talked abt at all. he fucked PC over when he wouldn’t follow through w his sham marriage to courtney, and it was met w a cheesy speech from her abt how he needs to follow his heart and do what he thinks is right. it always struck me as a weird oversight, and to finally see someone take him to task for how taxing his behavior can be was refreshing. his only other “depth” was the asexual stuff and honestly? that is stupid and does not actually count for anything

if it didnt warm your heart when PC named her daughter ruthie then you dnt have one. i wasn’t as invested in her narrative as i’d have liked to be, but its good when PC is happy and that’s what everyone wants

IM SO GLAD JUDAH IS BACK. also i still hope he and PC end up together (and maybe she has a viable pregnancy this time w him a la sex and the city charlotte but that’s a little too cornball sappy for this show). generally rly enjoyed how characters from previous seasons were incorporated this time around. but i dnt want them to bring back vincent adultman jst to spite everyone who’s always saying “bring back vincent adultman”

pickles is still my least favorite character even tho the surprise wedding episode was probably the one i found the funniest. realistically i wanna see things work out for PB but his relationship w her is obviously not the move for him, and she’s also the worst

i like diane and guy together, they have rly good chemistry but i also have a bad feeling abt where things are headed w them. he seems ambivalent abt how principled she is and the scene where his son comes to the party and he makes her leave when he could have jst introduced her as a party guest if it even needed to happen at all... there was jst something off abt it. like you can definitely see the cracks in the foundation already and it’s disappointing

the scene btwn PB and bojack where bojack says to him “but i understand that feeling of needing to bottle up your guilt, not burden other people w it. you think you’re protecting them from your toxicity, you convince yourself that you’re being selfless, but it comes out in other ways and it infects everything” hit close to home bc it reminded me of someone i used to bond over this show w and like... whew

i rly love how the dominoes are being set up w the reporters (even tho their his girl friday shtick got old fast) bc the way things are culminating, the story getting out is liable to expose bojack for everything. if they approach penny and she talks to them abt what happened, she’s liable to tell them that bojack and sarah lynn went to ohio to find her in the time before sarah lynn overdosed, and the pictures that her classmates took of them could establish a time frame. he was in new mexico when he was supposed to be filming secretariat, and that knowledge could lead to them finding out that he’d been digitally replaced in the movie. when this information gets out, it’s very likely that gina will dogpile onto it w the truth abt what happened on the set of philbert, since trying to conceal her ptsd is actively hurting her acting career bc of the reputation she’s developing as a problem actress, and even though she dznt *want* to be “that girl that got choked by bojack horseman”, she won’t have a choice if she can’t get jobs otherwise. i guess there’s always a chance that penny and charlotte won’t talk to them, but now that hollyhock knows about what happened in new mexico, either way his personal life will be hurt by this. i’m not sure what’ll happen to him professionally, since there’s a recurring point the series has been making w famous people never being held fully culpable for their negative actions, and it’s a dicey thing for them to approach w a character that many viewers find sympathetic without ending on some myopic note abt cancel culture (whether intentionally or by popular interpretation) but im excited

i also hate how my obsessive watching and rewatching of this show meant that the intended pete repeat reveal (like, you’re not supposed to recognize him until his identity becomes obvious through the prom night story) was sort of compromised for me bc i recognized his voice and the second he introduced himself, i placed him IMMEDIATELY but it was still such a great scene. it’s the most tense i remember feeling when watching and an all around great cliffhanger

the final line of e7 comes off as some rly grim foreshadowing–– “it looks like you found solace in our show. stay if you’d like. in 30 minutes, we start over”. but it’s such an incredible line in context. my god, i fucking love this show, you guys

#i might add more to this later but for now

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dustedmagazine · 6 years ago

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The Dusted Mid-Year Exchange: 2018 Edition, Part 1

In our fifth annual switcheroo, Dusted writers review each other’s favorite records, venturing out of the genres where they feel most comfortable to wrestle with excellence outside their frame of reference. As always, assignments were made at random with the only rules being: a) you can’t review your own pick and b) you can’t review something you’ve already written about for Dusted.

Unlike in past years, there was no clear favorite in 2018, although artists including Marisa Anderson, Olden Yolk, DJ Koze and Kacey Musgraves made multiple lists. And perhaps most heartening, a number of writers amended their mid-year favorites after listening to other writers’ picks. We hope you’ll also be able to find some new favorites among the artists we highlight.

Today, we’ll run the first half of the mid-year blurbs (alphabetically) from Marisa Anderson to Joelle Leandre & Elisabeth Harnik. We’ll cover the second half of the alphabet tomorrow, then close our feature with individual writers’ best of lists through the first half.

Marisa Anderson — Cloud Corner (Thrill Jockey)

Cloud Corner by Marisa Anderson

Who recommended it? Eric McDowell

Did we review it? Not yet, but it’s assigned.

Ben Donnelly’s take:

"Slow Ascent" is one of the titles in Anderson's latest batch of profound electric guitar explorations. It's a good phrase to summarize her career and style, hiking higher with each release, wandering further from the trails. For the second time, she's tracking a few extra instruments into her miniatures without disrupting the solitude, keyboards and acoustic strings mostly matching the cracks and chime of her main axe. Her fingerpicking has a fractal aspect, where intricate and rapid patterns can create a cycle that's relaxed and gradual, as on the title track and other lilting numbers. "Lament," a slide blues with a dissipating tempo and skeletal keyboard notes is forceful in its minimalism. She's becoming a master of small contrasts. Nowhere better than the closer "Lift,” where folks sounds step aside for a plucky scale that spirals up, offset by sweeps that sound like brushing the harp of an open-lidded grand piano, but take focus as a harmonized electric. Her brilliance is ever more in focus.

The Armed — Only Love (Throatruiner)

ONLY LOVE by The Armed

Who recommended it? Jonathan Shaw

Did we review it? Yes. Jonathan Shaw said, “The Armed will likely be delighted by the divisive responses Only Love generates.”

Ian Mathers’ take:

You almost wish for anyone who’s potentially up for the Armed’s pummelling, exuberant, often frantic, tremendously maximalist take on hardcore and assorted associated genres to come to the record totally blind, and not just because “Witness” comes leaping out of the gates so forcefully. It can be fun to start digging around and register all the distancing tactics, purposeful obfuscation, sense of play, and weird links (to everything from Converge to, err, Rubicam and Young), but the visceral impact of Only Love is powerful enough that all that context should be saved for later. It’s one thing to start filling in context, it’s another thing to hear something as ferocious and compelling as “Role Models” (“NO INS! NO OUTS!” yell-chanted in a way I’m pretty sure even little kids would find appealing, if you could sneak this synth-spiked bomb past their parents) in the context of trying to figure out the game, if there is indeed a game here. After the roiling chaos of the first few listens subsides the sheer number of hooks packed inside these songs really settle in your mind, anchored by Ben Koller’s incredible drumming (possibly commissioned on false pretences) and just as adept at etching out a multi-part climax like the seething “On Jupiter” as just full-on sprinting on the likes of “Heavily Lined.” And then there’s “Fortune’s Daughter,” maybe the strongest earworm I’ve encountered yet in 2018. Who are the Armed and what are they up to? It’s not that I’m not interested in the answer to that kind of question, it’s more that as long as they keep making records as good as Only Love I’m happy to believe whatever they tell us (or don’t).

Bardo Pond — Volume 8 (Fire)

Volume 8 by Bardo Pond

Who recommended it? Jennifer Kelly

Did we review it? Yes, Jennifer said, “The sound, vast and muscularly monolithic as ever, seems more like a demon summoned periodically from a ring of fire than the product of any sort of linear development.”

Isaac Cooper’s take:

Like fellow travelers Yo La Tengo’s There’s A Riot Going On, Bardo Pond’s Volume 8 is stitched together from jam excerpts and spare parts, but unlike Riot, Volume 8 is remarkably cohesive and propulsive. Even at its droniest and spaciest, there is no shortage of momentum or sense that Volume 8 is a collection of barrel scrapings to tide over the diehards; it stands with any of Bardo Pond’s releases. The guitars on “Kailash” and “Flayed Wish” howl and wail like Lear on the heath, while the rhythm section pushes on, determined as Sisyphus. Two shorter pieces, “Power Children” and the gorgeous solo guitar piece “Cud,” act as a brief respite before the entropic and monstrously heavy closer, “And I Will”. Musical improvisation is one of the best means we have of tapping into the murky world of the unconscious, and Volume 8 demonstrates that while there’s plenty of chaos and darkness down there, it’s also the source of inspiration and transcendence.

Cut Worms — Hollow Ground (Jagjaguwar)

Hollow Ground by Cut Worms

Who recommended it? Ben Donnelly

Did we review it? Not yet...

Patrick Masterson’s take:

“Amid all the noise nowadays, there’s precious little that still makes me feel the way those peoples’ songs do, and aspiring to reach that level is a big part of what makes me do this to begin with.” This is Cut Worms’ Max Clarke in a charmingly earnest Medium interview last fall on some of his biggest influences – John Lennon, Bob Dylan, Lou Reed. Maybe you’ve heard of them; maybe you’ve heard of the level of cultural influence they have exerted on us all. And if you’ve heard the Alien Sunset EP that was released just after the interview ran, you’ll easily be able to see where Clarke was coming from in the time that he spent putting the homespun eight-track wonder together, splitting halves between Chicago and his current Brooklyn home. It’s a beautiful record that doesn’t overplay its hand, choosing instead to let the simplicity of his natural ear for a melody do the talking despite the humble recording quality. He was never going to reach the mythical heights of his influences plying away at that trade forever, of course, but his art was all the better for sounding so self-assured in its limitations.

Hollow Ground, however, is a Trojan Horse of the most exhausting variety. Those same reference points – the Beatles, Dylan, solo Reed – still apply, only here they spring forth in an aggressively augmented form with a backing band and a more fleshed-out sound that’s like saying, “Alexa, give me every pop music trend of the 60s at once” or, more accurately, like listening to someone too young to have experienced the decade but old enough to be familiar with its most basic cultural signifiers play an album’s worth of icons. How do we know? Check the new versions of Alien Sunset’s “Don’t Want to Say Good-Bye” and “Like Going Down Sideways”; they’re wholly different, coldly unlovable remakes of the intimate originals. Even his lyrics feel unconvincing; Clarke uses the pet name “baby” on 60% of the songs here, which, look: I don’t need to stare into a wordless void with Bill Basinski to feel something and there’s an evident surplus of genuinely touching heartache present, but that’s an affectation of the most irritatingly trite variety.

For a certain kind of person, Max Clarke is the perfect person; for that person, Hollow Ground will resonate simply, perfectly. I am not that person. I will never listen to this again – likely not individual songs, certainly not in full. Does that seem unduly harsh? Does it feel too personal? Does the cut worm forgive the plow? Guess we’ll see. Ask again when there’s a follow-up.

Sarah Davachi— Let Night Come on Bells End the Day (Recital)

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Who recommended it? Bryan Daly

Did we review it? No

Bill Meyer’s take:

Sarah Davachi puts out albums often enough that it’s hard to catch up, so please cut Dusted some slack for not getting to Let Night Come on Bells End the Day until now. The Canadian composer and multi-instrumentalist has followed All My Circles Run, an all-acoustic minimalist chamber piece, with an overdubbed solo recording for electric organ, acoustic piano, Mellotron and synthesizers. Like some ecclesiastic initiate, she has followed a solitary path to arrive at a place that is one with the cosmos. Her slow-morphing tones, incremental melodies, and exquisitely voiced harmonies don’t just sound like they should be played in a chapel; they erect a virtual space around the listener that only lets the ineffable through. If Andrei Tarkovsky was still around, he might be writing a movie to wrap around these sounds.

DJ Koze — Knock Knock (Pampa Records)

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Who recommended it? Patrick Masterson

Did we review it? Yes. Jennifer Kelly said it “has a humid, organic air, even its most rigorously electronic tracks seething with jungle-y vitality and caressing warmth.”

Ian Mathers’ take:

Like a lot of his peers, DJ Koze has been active and prolific for years without ever putting out that much in the way of “proper” albums, which probably goes some way towards explaining why Knock Knock, only his third, sounds so relaxed, confident and casually accomplished. With stellar vocal turns by everyone from Lambchop’s Kurt Wagner to folkie José González to Róisín Murphy (who’s rarely put her imperious purr to better effect than on the two perfectly-matched tracks she’s on here), 16 tracks in total and a lengthy running time, Knock Knock feels like a bit of a Statement from the producer. Which makes it maybe even more impressive that some of the best stuff here (like the sad jam “Pick Up” with its perfectly deployed vocal sample, or the almost-Avalanches style “Baby (How Much I LFO You)”) is just Koze without a high-profile guest vocalist. The whole thing has a friendly warmth and subtle propulsiveness that makes for compulsive listening; if this isn’t Koze at the peak of his powers, it sure feels like it could be.

Tashi Dorji and Tyler Damon — Leave No Trace: Live in St. Louis (Family Vineyard)

Leave No Trace: Live In St. Louis by Tashi Dorji & Tyler Damon

Who recommended it? Isaac Olson

Did we review it? Yes, Isaac said, "While these performances are undoubtedly chaotic, they never feel purposeless.”

Justin Cober-Lake's take:

That guitarist Tashi Dorji and percussionist Tyler Damon have a limitless supply of ideas isn't surprising, but it's remarkable how well they've organized them into sensible packages on Leave No Trace: Live in St. Louis. Neither of the quarter-hour tracks here are exactly linear, but they do progress both coherently and unhaltingly. “Leave No Trace” offers the most noise, with the first half of the piece continuously crescendoing. The disappearance of one artist or the other simply means the soloist has more volume to cover. The pair spend the last two minutes together, Damon crashing away while Dorji sounds like two guitarists fitting blips together.

“Calm the Shadows” works differently. While not a suite, the song comes in sections, with Dorji and Damon filling in an outline as they go. The pair respond to each other, and work mutually on an unpredictable but discernable path. The slow build to the noisy section lets the chaos function as a thesis statement with the back half of the track the understanding of what to do with it. Dorji's pointed playing through that section answers the early rumble without making anything easier. Damon's sounds complete the thought. When “Leave No Trace” works so hard to slowly heap sounds before smashing through it all, the effect is amplified but the control of its predecessor. Dorji and Damon are a few albums in now and, while there wasn't much doubt from the start, they seem to be working in a rare place right now.

Holland/Parker/Taborn/Smith—Uncharted Territories (Dare2 Records)

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Who recommended it? Derek Taylor

Did we review it? Not yet.

Jennifer Kelly’s take:

It feels like a math puzzle. How many distinct ensembles including duos, trios and quartets can be formed out of four musicians? But hearing it in practice as master bassist Dave Holland, free jazz titan Evan Parker, pianist Craig Taborn and drummer-vibe-ist Ches Smith assemble and disassemble into improvisatory groups is quite another thing. “Trio No Tenor” on disc one takes a luminous shimmer from jangling metallic percussion, abstract interpolations of piano and the shape-shifting tone of plucked, hanging bass tones. “Duo Bass Tenor” on disc two is far more fluid and contemplative, as long bowed bass notes underline the fluttering explorations of sax; its two old friends finding space in each other’s musings, darting in to challenge and interject and locating points of agreement even in occasional dissonance. The quartets, though, are the most astonishing, (I like #5 from Disc 2), as extraordinary, unruly energies careen off one another, extemporizing, reacting, reaching over and in between each other in a dense mesh of sound that seems, nonetheless, uncrowded and precisely choreographed. Only three cuts were composed ahead, the rest worked out in two days of live improvisation. Uncharted indeed.

Quin Kirchner — The Other Side of Time (Astral Spirits)

The Other Side of Time by Quin Kirchner

Who recommended it? Bill Meyer

Did we review it? Yes, Eric McDowell said: “ Kirchner sidesteps novelty and navel-gazing by putting pyrotechnics second to, well, music.”

Jennifer Kelly’s take:

Kirchner leads from behind on this sprawling two LP solo debut, his drumming feverishly hot but held in check so that others — saxophonist Nate Lepine, bass clarinet player Jason Stein, trombonist Nick Broste and Matt Ulery — can take the spotlight. Interplay between the two reed players is intricately, acrobatically fine. In opener “Ritual,” Lepine jets off with Stein in hot, asynchronous pursuit, Kirchner executing a furiously syncopated undertow, part samba shuffle, part continually exploding roll. “Brainville,” the Sun Ra cover, swings and swaggers, bass and drums in arch, stylized conversation. Kirchner is, maybe a drummer’s drummer, but this is not a drummer’s record, except on two lovely, timbrally varied “Drums & Tines” tracks, where layers of kit rhythms and kalimba intersect in fascinating geometric patterns. Kirchner clearly reveres another band leader whose instrument didn’t always occupy the top of the mix; Mingus’ “Self-Portrait Three Colors” cuts the drums to brush-on-snares, while giving Broste a chance to wail, the two reedists to evoke lush dance-hall sensualism, the bassist to pluck out dark blots of body-moving tone. Kirchner is not the façade, but the architect and also the guy who holds up the building.

Joelle Leandre & Elisabeth Harnik — Tender Music (Trost Records)

Tender Music by Joelle Leandre / Elisabeth Harnik

Who recommended it? Eric McDowell

Did we review it? No

Isaac Olson’s take:

The best part of listening to improvised music is hearing the moment when the musicians lock in and the music takes on a life of its own, when the thrill of discovery dissolves the boundaries between performer and audience. There are many such moments on Tender Music, an improvised set from bassist Joelle Leandre and pianist Elisabeth Harnik. A few examples: the swelling tension that emerges at the one and a half minute mark of “Ear Area I,” the rising anxiety and tentative conclusion of “Ear Area IV”’s final minute, and the march that closes out “Ear Area VI”. Between these peaks, Leandre and Harnik evoke Cecil Taylor, Morton Feldman, blues, bop, classical and more, sometimes all within the space of two or three minutes. Fortunately, Leandre and Harnik are attentive enough players that their restlessness never comes at the cost of coherence. Leandre and Harnik are formidable soloists whose use of extended techniques coax ear-tickling, unexpected timbres from their instruments, but it is when they’re playing together, and more or less “normally,” that Tender Music is at its best, that the melodic and rhythmic invention of both players shines brightest, and that they’re able to speak to each other, and to us, most clearly.

#marisa anderson #the armed #bardo pond #cutworms #sarah davachi #dusted magazine #mid-year 2018 #dj koze #tashi dorji #tyler damon #dave holland #evan parker #craig taborn #ches smith #quin kirchner #joelle leandre #elisabeth harnik #midyear

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littlemessyjessi · 7 years ago

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Bobcat and Raven: My Beginnings With the Craft : A Personal Experience #MagicalMonday

Hello, smoochies!

Welcome to my witchy weirdness!

Now, disclaimer here: I do not claim to know everything or anything. I don't claim that my way is the right way or the wrong. This is just my way that works for me and I thought I'd share it with you. Feel free to tweak it to your own needs but lord, here we go.

If you'd like to read more of the Witchy Weirdness series, you can find the masterlist HERE :)

I know it's been a hot second since the last installment but I'm trying to make a nice little schedule and get things out to you when I can.

Today's post will be a taaaaaad bit different.

So a few of you have asked me if I'd talk about my own personal experience with the craft.

For a while, I didn't see the point because we're all different and unique but then I realized....there's a lot of people out there that feel like they're alone and they're scared.

And that's ok, honeybuns...but you're not alone.

We're here with you.

Brothers, sisters, it's ok loves.

Be afraid if you'd like and you claim your fear because that's yours.

And I guess...that's where my journey started.

I was maybe six or so at the time when I first started my path.

My great granny, bless her soul, kept me a lot back then and I was one hell of a little demon.

Her and Pap were getting much too old to deal with the likes of me but they did it anyway because my mom wasn't the best of caregivers and just basically abandoned me and when she did have me....well it just wasn't a pleasant experience let's put it like that.

So, anyway, Granny took care of me a lot.

She taught me how to cook and how to garden.

How to grow my own food and what to do with it.

Natural remedies and to thank whoever for whatever the earth gave you.

I think in a lot of ways she was my first experience with the craft even if she didn't call it that.

She...she just taught me a lot.

Ya'll forgive me if I ramble.

This is very personal and I'm bound to get emotional.

And while I've been criticized for the way I write...I just type what goes through my mind's eyes...so it's rather raw and unfiltered most of the time.

I'm sorry, lol.

Anyway, she taught me a lot and she died the year I turned thirteen.

How cliche huh? But that's how it happened.

She died in church that Sunday and I remember very distinctly that I was upset because I hadn't been with her in her last moments.

I'd been away on a trip at the time- gone off with some friend to the mountains for some reason or another.

We were outside playing in the woods (Like we shoudn't have been without supervision) and somehow I'd gotten seperated from Sarah Beth.

I remember laughing and giggling because we'd been playing and then realizing how alone I was.

And that's when I heard it.

A little whine of sorts, this awful little sound.

I remember stomping through the mud, making my little New Balance tennis shoes completely caked in it...something I was sure to recieve a whooping for whenever I got home.

And I kept hearing this sound and I looked in this little hole/cave like area in the side of the hill (which was very stupid btw. Do not do this. There could've just as easily been a mountain lion in there with cubs and I could've gotten my face torn off. But I digress.)

Anyway, I pulled back a bunch of mud and muck and I found this little kitten.

Now, to me it had just looked like a little tabby cat kitten.

I was too young to know the difference or to know that you should not pick up wild animals.

But I did anyway.

It was tiny and covered in what I now realize was basically amniotic fluid.

I remember freaking out because I thought it was bleeding and it was a little bit because half it's damn right ear was gone.

That's when I saw what must've been the momma...dead.

She'd clearly been attacked and there were little kits on the ground next to her.

All dead.

No one had survived but this little stinker and it was barely kicking as it was.

Clearly, it escaped with just part of the ear missing.

So I did what you're not supposed to do...

I tucked it in my jacket and headed back to Sarah Beth who nearly killed me for running off.

Now, I know some of you might believe this next part and some of you make thing I'm totally nuts.

But I believe in reincarnation.

And I believe that that little kit was my Granny being reborn into this world again.

I know some of you think I'm nuts.

But here's the kicker.

That was a bobcat.

And no I should not have touched it.

Especially when I saw the momma but it just didn't click in my head.

Now the reason that this is so important is because my Granny's nickname was Bobcat.

Pap called her that since they were children and they lived just down the street from each other.

He used to call her "Kitty" when she was little because she was a touch me not and then when she developed an attitude and damn near tore his face off more than once....he called her Bobcat and it stuck.

For 53 years, guys.

She called him Ray, short for Raven, because he was always following her around and mocking her.

Note: Ravens are scavengers and due follow animals. They are also known to mimick sounds and are very good at this.

So, that was one thing that stood out to me but I honestly didn't really think about it until it began to grow.

Now, I took it back and Sarah's parents just about killed us and even though I bawled my eyes out....they turned it over to the authorities in the area so it could be nursed back to health.

So anyway, we head back home and I get there and I'm informed that Granny has passed.

Of course, I'm completely heartbroken.

I remember I didn't even really talk for about three days.

I stayed outside, in the tree house for a couple nights until my Uncle just made me go inside.

I just felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest.

So for a while, I stopped living on an earth centric path.

Several years passed and by the time I was about seventeen...things were really bad.

A lot of things happened in that time.

A lot of dark things.

A lot of really damaging things happened to be and I got further and further away from the light.

Eventually, I was very near suicide and apparently everyone could see it.

I wouldn't admit.

There was no way you'd ever get that out of me but it was gonna happen sooner or later.

A few of my family members and my then boyfriend took me up to the mountains again for about a week.

I mean, honestly, I felt like I was on house arrest.

I couldn't be alone.

Everyone was watching me.

They kept trying to distract or get me to talk.

I was just so sick of it.

So one night I woke up in the middle of night...and just went outside.

Which mind you...is stupid to do in the mountains.

Especially, in that particular area because it's entirely possible to have a mountain lion or a bear out there.

Don't do that. I was an idiot.

So anyway, I go out in my fucking pajamas with a cigarette and nothing else.... like a nutcase and I'm sitting there on the railing smoking something I managed to bum off this kid at the front desk at the cabin check ins.

And then I hear something.

I look around and I don't see anything...because it's dark and I couldn't be bothered to turn on the light.

Honestly, it's miracle something didn't eat me just to get rid of my stupidity.

I'm serious.

Well, anyway.

I look over and there sitting on this porch swing...is a bobcat.

Now, I wasn't a total idiot and I did realize that there was a bobcat sitting there on a swing not three feet from me and if I pissed it off....it could easily fuck me up.

So I froze and then tried to back into the cabin.

I knew that typically they tended to shy away from human and here this one sat on the porch swing close to me and that if it had rabies that could cause erractic behavior.

I also knew that they were super fast and had crazy sharp claws.

So since I didn't favor being turned into shredded chicken any time time...I tried to back again.

Attention: Do not fucking run from them as it will provoke them to chase you. Same with mountain lions. Please for the love of gods, do not fucking run from mountain lions. You will not win and it will not end well. That sounds savage but I'm just telling you.

Anyway, I get back into the house and I stop because in what little light there is outside I see a shadow of this fucking bobcat....with half of it's fucking ear missing.

And I just freeze like an idiot.

And then I started crying because I was positive that this was the little kit that I found several years back.

Eventually someone heard me and jerked me back into the house before turning the light on and making enough noise to run it off and wake up everyone else.

I was lectured.

I was hugged close enough that I could feel my lungs squeeze.

I was told that we were going back home.

However, I begged them to stay.

I told them I'd talk.

I'd work through it.

Honestly, it was more than anyone had heard from me in a long time so we stayed.

Pap was with us on that trip and finally I broke down and told him about the bobcat, and the one I'd found...and why I got so emotional about it.

He understood and the next morning I saw him sitting in the swing with coffee in hand...and that bobcat was on the side of the hill, head down on it's paws, just looking at him.

I remember I tried to get his attention to keep him safe but he just told me to come on outside.

I was cautious but I went because I trusted Pap and sat with him.

He looked at the bobcat and looked at me and he said, "You know that's your Granny."

I'll be honest.

It chilled me to the bone because there was no way I was going to say that outloud.

Given everything that had happened to me and my depression...I knew saying that would get me put into a glorified looney bin.

Call it what you will but we all know what it is.

I remember trying to beat around the bush and he called me on it more than once.

He told me that he just knew and that he knew that I knew...because Granny and I always had that connection.

I remember him pointing out the ear.

Now, it's important to know that my Granny was a cancer survivor.

She had it four times and kept pulling through.

However the last time had caused her to lose a good chunk of her ear because they had to cut it out.

I had honestly forgotten about it at the time because I just didn't see that kind of thing when I looked at Granny.

I remember him telling me how a normal bobcat would've already run off but that that had to be his "Bobcat" because while she was a touch me not...she always wanted the attention.

He also informed me that while my Aunt was trying to load up my suitcases that morning while I was asleep (so that we would have to go home sooner)....the bobcat was sitting on top of the jeep.

I remember him telling me how she was my guardian all my life and that she was my guardian again now.

I remember just breaking down and crying for hours.

People came out to try and help but Pap just waved them off...and that bobcat stayed there the whole time.

Never moved.

Never did anything.

Guys, I'm sorry if my writing is so broken for this but I get very emotional with this memory.

I'm trying to share things with you because I think it's important to share them but wow, I just really miss her.

Anyway, I'm getting it together.

So, my point is half the family went ahead and went back home and I stayed there in the mountains with Pap, my Uncles for another week.

It was pretty quiet and honestly I felt better than I had in a while.

I stayed in the loft and kept the blinds open.

The bobcat would come back every day and just lay there.

Pap would sit outside and drink coffee and he eventually convinced me start meditating.

I'd do my thing and he'd ask me ever so often if I could mix up something for his psoriasis because it was itching.

I remember telling them that I didn't really remember how to do it anymore but that I had some lotion.

He said nothing being the natural and eventually the guilty got the best of me and I tried my best to make him an oil for it.

I was rusty and it was waaaaaay rough around the edges but he used it anyway.

We actually happened to be there towards the end so that it did actually coincide with a full moon.

Which has less to do with coincidence and more to do with the fact that I ended up in that damn cabin for close to 2 1/2 weeks, lol.

Anyway, it had been a long time since I'd done anything full moon meditation and so I took a minute to do it by sitting in front of the window and closing my eyes.

I prayed.

I focused.

I meditated.

And when I was done and I opened my eyes....there it was again.

It was just laying there until it got up and jumped down on to the porch and up onto the other side of the window.

It stared at me right through the glass and I'll admit to being afraid.

It just stared until it leaned forward and pressed it's head against the glass.

I don't know what possessed me to do it but I just did it too.

And all I could hear was my Granny's voice in my head telling me that she loved me and that it was ok to be sad.

It's your choice to believe me or not because that's not what mattered.

After that, the bobcat just looked at me for a moment and then walked away.

I didn't see it again on that trip after that and then we went back home.

But guys, a few years ago my Pap died and we had his funeral in the mountains because that's where he was from and where his original family was.

So we all went and we got a different cabin so we could stay a week.

I'll be honest, I was really devasted when he died.

The other family that went with us on the trip was my Dad's side of the family.

Pap just went because he loved and cared about me.

So really Granny and Pap were the only ones on my mother's side of the family who really gave a damn about me...and I just felt so empty again after that.

I remember bawling my eyes out again but doing much better than I had the first time.

I was older now and an adult so I got up and got a cup of coffee.

I went out on the porch with my coffee and my poptart (like a fully functioning adult, lol) and sat on the little bench and when I finally looked up I nearly had a heart attack.

There was a bobcat and a raven on the hill side.

Fear and panic were the first things to course through me because hello, bobcat.

The second was shock because what the fuck?!

And then I noticed that damn ear again and I just started tearing up.

I remember actually whispering 'Granny?' and it just laid down.

And that raven...

Which by the way, this is important.

Raven's are not a popular bird in Tennessee. This is usually more of a crow territory but there is a specific popular of ravens that migrated into the mountains of east tennessee years ago. Ok, factoids over, lol.

Anyway, this damn raven just hops up and lands on the railing in front of me...and I'm just sitting there staring at the both of them like I'm looking at Jesus Christ himself.

And I'm just crying because I have no doubt in my mind that that was Granny and Pap.

Bobcat and Raven.

For me, that was magic.

That was the earth and the universe pulling it in.

I don't believe that we ever leave each other.

I don't believe than anything is really ever over.

Have I seen them again since then?

No.

But I like to think that maybe one day when it's my time to go....they welcome me on a walk through the mountains with them.

Thank you for being apart of my little walk down memory lane.

I'm crying again.

Bawling my eyes out actually.

I'm not sad really.

I just miss them and I'm so grateful to have had them in my life.

Thank you, smoochies for listening to me blubber and I hope that sharing my experience with you had helped you.

Much love, all the light and many, many blessings to you.

)0( Kennysaurus )0( Love you forever Bobcat and Raven

Permanent Tag List:

@frankie2902 @pleasantdreamqueen @becrazy--beyou

@jimmys-afterlife-love @the-great-irene @fanfictionandjunk @angelus320

@alanlizzingtonshore @buriednurbckyrd @disneymarina @tubbypeachwriting

@sullybot @blackirisposts @georgiagrl1990 @whenallsaidanddone

@littledeadrottinghood @therealmrshale @woodworthti666

If ya’ll have a specific topic ya’ll want to see discussed on the Witchy Weirdness series just please send it in through the ask box. Thanks and I love you guys.

#witchy weirdness #magic #witch #pagan #earth #earth centered religion #reincarnation #personal experience #kennysaurus #littlemessyjessi #magicalmonday #magicmonday

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