#chatzy: nicole

[faetedwill]

Sketch Ya Later! || Sloane & Nicole

TIMING: Current. LOCATION: White Crest National Park PARTIES: @faetedwill​ @nicsalazar SUMMARY: Nicole happens across Sloane's notebook and draws conclusions about what's inside. Sloane doesn't try to mitigate her fear until Nicole shares the reason for her apprehension.  CONTENT WARNINGS: None

Sloane glanced up briefly from her sketchbook, pencil knocking against her chin as she squinted towards the bird’s nest that sat high above her in the branches of a greening tree. Spring had already taken its leave, leading to a warming summer sun. While Sloane wasn’t particularly fond of sweating, she enjoyed the way that the sun felt against her skin. To lay out beneath it was one of the simplest things a person could do, and so she did just that. She’d opted out of taking summer classes, but she still managed to pour over the assigned readings that’d been posted on the forum for students who had decided to enroll for the session. It wasn’t necessary, but it made her feel ahead of the curve. 

After a while, Sloane put the books away and decided to do some sketching. The blanket she laid over the hood of her car was beginning to warm, too, which meant it was nearly time to take her leave and retire to a cooler place. Venturing further into the green had crossed her mind– find a shady spot to stay, lean against a tree, maybe. But she had decided against it after a lecture from her mother. You need to be careful now more than ever. So Sloane listened, and she stayed atop her car. Sloane lifted her water bottle, a frown pulling at the corners of her lips as she realized it was empty. Lucky enough for her, there was a small fountain and restrooms that weren’t too far from where she’d parked her car. Sloane slid off of the hood of her car and walked to the rest area. After filling her water bottle and rounding the small building – walls made of some kind of white concrete that’d begun to grow slick with pollen, she noticed that there was another car in the lot now, and a figure was looking down at something in their hands, just next to Sloane’s car. 

Nicole thought she’d be alone in the lot. Picked the little spot behind the buildings for exactly that reason. It was one those hidden gems around town that she preferred visiting when she was desperate for some peace and quiet. Though by the looks of it, it wasn’t so hidden anymore. Her gaze was drawn to the empty car as she climbed out of her truck, Pax leaping behind her. On top of the hood she spotted a few abandoned items. And shit– the setup was intriguing enough for Nicole to have to battle her curiosity. What if something happened to the owner? Who would leave their things and vanish?

Almost as if she was meant to get involved, one of the books slipped down the hood, falling onto the ground. Pax was the first to approach, sniffing around the mysterious book. Without a second thought, Nicole walked over to pick it up, maybe search for a name or something regarding its owner’s identity. Crouching by it, something else caught her attention before she could flipped through the pages. The sketchbook was open, so technically she wasn’t snooping. 

Bottom lip worried between her teeth, she scanned the drawings in front of her. Were they good? Metzli might have a more qualified opinion on the matter, but Nicole thought they were pretty good. Except– Having affinity for bones and carcasses was bad, right? Yes, it was bad. Had she not learned anything over the past two years? Hell, the past few weeks? 

Nicole was not going to get involved. It was none of her business. Which is why she was going to put the sketchbook right where it slipped from and continue with her day. Whoever the owner was, they were a wildly creative person, and that was all that mattered. Pax pulled her out of her thoughts with a bark, alerting her of another presence behind them. Oh. A young woman. Too young to be drawing all of that creepy shit. Well, she was concerned now. And involved. She gave her dog a soothing pat on his head before she stood, turning towards the girl and showing her the book she had just found. “Yours?” She held it open, displaying one of the most disturbing drawings. “It’s…uh– it’s really… something”.

Sloane looked onward, taking note of the dog, and then the woman. She wondered if she approached, would the dog smell Steve and go ballistic? Or was that just her dog who happened to lose all composure at the immediate sense of another dog, as if Sloane had meant to betray him. Twisting the lid of her water bottle, Sloane approached them, anxiously screwing it and unscrewing it. Finally within ear shot, Sloane nodded and took another step forward, setting the water bottle onto the hood of her car. She took the sketchbook back and dusted some dust off of the corner of the page. “Yes, it’s mine.” Sloane looked up at the stranger, immediately taking note of the way she spoke about her sketchbook. 

“I like anatomy.” This wasn’t anything she hadn’t dealt with before. In art class in the seventh grade, she remembered how the drawing she had turned in for a final grade had been torn apart by her teacher for being too gruesome. Her mother had been called, and of course, there were no repercussions. They don’t know the talent you hold, or how important your connection to what you draw is, Mo grá. So even as the stranger stood in front of her, clearly disgusted by what Sloane had drawn, she decided she didn't care. Had decided on it a long time ago. “Is there something wrong?” Sloane tilted her head to the side as she closed the sketchbook, setting it back onto the hood of her car. The dog’s tail wagged, a rhythmic thump against its owner’s leg. “You have a cute dog. My dog’s name is Steve, but he’s at home right now.” Maybe she should just be as off putting as possible, creep this person out even more. Served her right. After all, why was she allowed to look down on Sloane? “Or, at least that’s where I think I left him.” 

“It fell” Nicole was quick to clarify, in case she hadn’t arrived on time to see her picking it up. She couldn’t have her thinking she was checking her personal items –which she was– for no apparent reason. Once the sketchbook was back with its owner, she stepped back, keeping a comfortable distance. She supposed that was it. They both could continue with their lives. She didn’t get to head back to her truck before the girl spoke again, explaining her drawings. 

Nicole glanced at the notebook again. “Ah” she clenched her jaw, hopelessly trying not to overthink this random encounter. Anywhere else, a passion for anatomy would’ve been exactly that. And it may have been the case for the small woman in front of her too. But in White Crest things were never so simple, and bones were always attached to some kind of trouble. She met her gaze when she heard the question. Was there something wrong? Nicole hoped not, for the kid’s sake. Maybe she should just come out and ask the stupid question she had in her mind, and risk looking either incredibly paranoid or possibly insane to this woman. Are you in a cult, or are you supernatural? More than anything, she wanted to be able to help. If help was something the girl required. So burning that bridge so quickly wasn’t the best idea. “I don’t know yet,” she said honestly, eyes flickering from the hood of the car, back to the woman. You tell me. “How long have you liked anatomy?” It couldn’t hurt to ask Leah about death obsessed people when she stopped by later. If she didn’t leave this encounter at peace with herself, that is. 

“Oh. This is Pax,” Nicole glanced down at him with a smile. The dog sniffed around some more until he finally decided to approach the stranger. “He’s pretty friendly, just a little shy”. Not that he looked it at the moment, searching for some extra pets. She had been smiling at the interaction, but it vanished as soon as the girl mentioned her own dog. Eyebrows knit together, she shot her a curious look. “You– you think? Is…is that a thing you do? Leaving things and just–”

Sloane searched the stranger’s features, immediately taking note of how tense she looked. It wasn’t new, the feeling of creating unease. Maybe if her sketchbook hadn’t been looked at, Sloane could offer her a slightly less intimidating smile. Maybe she would even ask her how her day had been, or ask about the best trail. But instead this stranger had decided to judge her, and for no reason other than her own discomfort. There were things to worry about in White Crest, that was for certain. But at the moment, there was very little harm that Sloane could commit against the park ranger. A part of her felt as though she recognized her, but it was something in the back of her mind. She couldn’t be certain. The town was busy enough, but it was small enough too, and with the amount of people who … ceased to exist, it was a little easier to keep track than say if she’d lived somewhere with a higher body count. 

Though, even Sloane is surprised by the question that breaks between them. She’s almost too confused to answer, but she quickly regains her composure. Sloane cleared her throat and shrugged, crossing her arms over her chest. Not necessarily a defensive gesture, but not a friendly one either. “A while. I like other things too. I guess you didn’t see those, huh?” 

“Pax.” The name is short, sweet. It fit the dog if Sloane were being honest. It sniffed around at the ground and slowly approached her, its head kept low but tail still wagging. Sloane leaned down to pet him, fingers stretched and scratching just behind the dog’s ear. “Sometimes he goes to work with my dad even though he’s not supposed to. Sometimes he goes to work with my mom. That’s allowed, since it’s inside.” She wouldn’t feed too much information to this woman, if not for her own gratification that it was clear there were questions that hung between them. 

Nicole almost laughed at the woman’s retort. Thankfully, her facial muscles still resisted that sort of carefree action. She kinda deserved that one, didn’t she? “It fell” she repeated, bowing her head to accept the judgement. “I picked up. Didn’t really choose what to look at. I’m not nosy” that was a fucking lie, and she knew it, but there was no reason for the girl not to believe her. “So… you’re some kind of artist, then? Is… is that–” she nodded at the sketchbook, trailing off. That would make sense, she supposed. And it was possibly the best case scenario. It dawned on her how quickly she had jumped into conclusions based on one creepy drawing. But could anyone really blame her? 

“What– what, uh… other stuff you got there? Cause… I mean– I saw it, sorry. You’re really good”. Nicole had come to understand that sometimes, people treated her differently. For whatever reason, whether it was her struggle to speak eloquently or the perpetual confusion carved into her features, people took pity on her. So maybe, it wasn’t a bad thing to take advantage of, from time to time, no? Throw in a genuine compliment and hope for the best. Right? She sure hoped it was enough to make up for her transgression, at least.

She kept a watchful eye as the girl and her dog interacted, giving them a few seconds before she walked over to her truck to grab the leash on her seat. Her dog didn’t show any further signs of apprehension with the stranger, which allowed Nicole to relax. A little. She called for him, kneeling by his side to hook the leash as she listened to the girl talk about her dog. “I see” she nodded. Sure, it seemed like an incredibly obvious answer. Maybe she had overreacted. Again. She brushed the top of her dog’s head gently, before looking up. “Well… um, Pax’s is always happy to meet new friends. What– what was his name again?”

Sloane narrowed her eyes, but decided to let up on the stranger. What was the point in insisting somebody was doing something they wouldn’t take ownership of? Maybe it wasn’t that deep, and maybe Sloane was being too defensive. It was hard to tell, the lines were so blurred these days. “You’re not nosy. Got it.” Sloane offered the stranger a tight-lipped smile. At her question, she shrugged. “Is that what you got from the book? Or do I seem like a wannabe.” She knew her art was good, but the fact that she was being asked at all meant that the woman had her doubts. Whether it was due to the content, or the skill, was left to be determined. 

“I guess it depends on what I feel like drawing each day. Each page has something. What you landed on might not have been your speed, and my mom told me that not everything will please everyone, so I should just keep doing whatever as long as it’s not hurting myself or others.” Her mom had also told her to flip the bird to anyone who suggested Sloane act any differently, but depending on how receptive this woman was, Sloane would tuck that away for later.

The dog was cute. Not as cute as Steve, or even Luna, but he was cute. She scratched behind his ears a moment longer before he was retreating to his owner’s call. She was only mildly disappointed. Sloane folded her arms across her chest and leaned against her car. “Steve can be kind of a lot, but he likes new friends, too.” It was smart, probably– the way this woman decided to leash her dog. Being this close to the woods, it was hard to tell what wouldn’t pop out and steal something of value away. “What’d you say your name was again?” Sloane asked in a roundabout way, no intention of taking the brunette’s name, but wanting to know it all the same. “I’d like to know who to attribute all of this judgment to when I decide to put it in a gallery later.” as if she’d ever do that. 

“I’m… not” Nicole confirmed, nodding solemnly. Maybe if said it enough she’d believe it herself. Her gaze drifted to the book again as she thought of the girl’s question. If she got another look then she’d be able to answer more truthfully. But a second peek seemed impossible right now. “I’m not… I don’t really know how to tell those two apart. Haven’t drawn since…middle school, probably” and they were never anything to write home about. “But they… it looked good. So even if your’re…even if you’re not an artist, maybe you should consider it” she clenched her jaw at that. Okay, she was trying a little too hard.

“I see” at this point it felt like Nicole was spending more time with her eyes fixed on the top of the hood than anywhere near the girl’s face. Really, if she could just get another look, then all her worries would be eased. “Solid advice” the corners of her mouth stretched into a bittersweet smile, remembering how she had stopped following any of her mother's words. She wondered how disappointed she’d be if she knew she turned into… whatever she was now. Definitely not the strong girl she raised. “Sounds like a smart woman” she settled for, after letting out a wistful sigh. 

“Great– then, maybe… maybe they could meet one day” Once Nicole made sure there was nothing to worry about regarding this woman, of course. After leashing Pax, she rose to her feet, wiping dirt from her jeans. “I didn’t– I’m Nicole, You?” despite herself, a chuckle did escape her lips this time because of that comment. The woman wasn’t going to let her off the hook so quickly, and she deserved it. “Can I– can I be honest?” it wasn’t something she liked to be most of the time. Withholding information always felt the safest option. Sometimes being honest meant speaking about things that still tortured her. Other times, being honest could lead to conflict, which she always she ran from. But since she had been apprehensive with the girl for no reason, she supposed honesty was something she could grant her. 

Sloane wasn’t sure if the pained expression on the woman’s face was because of the drawing, or because she just really hated doling out compliments. Whatever it was, it was only slightly satisfying to Sloane. She didn’t like when people lied to her, not because of her own inability to lie, but because she preferred it when people said what they actually meant. When people hid their truths, it only lead way to … well, difficulties. Okay, so maybe it was because of her own inability to lie, but it wasn’t like this woman knew that. “Anything can be art if you want it to be.” That much was true. Who was Sloane to say what art was and wasn’t? Especially when her own talent had been built on a hobby, not out of necessity or want. 

“She is.” Sloane watched her for a moment before crossing her arms over her chest, bag forgotten on the hood of her car, blanket laying lopsided overtop of it. It had already begun to become bleached by the sun from the amount of use she’d put it through. Her mom would have her head– it was one of her favorites. 

Admittedly, the banshee hadn’t anticipated the stranger offering another point of meeting, especially after the way she had reacted to the drawings. Sloane looked at her with mild interest as finally gave her name. Nicole. That was pretty, but not the kind of name that Sloane would’ve wanted to take. And besides, it wasn’t like she was doing anything that bad. Yet. “Some would call me Sloane, some would call me Kennedy, but really it’s up to you. Are you chill, or are you one of those weird formal types who only calls people by their last name?” Sloane hummed under her breath as she turned around, grabbing the strap of her bag and pulling it over her shoulder. The blanket fell sideways and she quickly began to fold it up again. At Nicole’s question, Sloane tilted her head to the side. “I mean, it depends. Can you?” She searched the brunette’s expression before letting out a sigh. “Yeah, go for it. You think it fucking sucks, don’t you? Not a big deal, but it would’ve been nice if you hadn’t funneled me with false compliments. At least let me down easy.” Jokes on jokes, Sloane rounded her car and shoved the blanket through the open window. 

“That sounds a little– no, a lot like bullshit. Anything, really?” Nicole doubted that to be true. Wasn’t art supposed to follow rules too? People studied it. Musicians learned to compose or interpret intricate melodies, painters had to learn about brush techniques, or color combination. And, that was probably the most she had thought about art since high school. Save for the guitar her mother taught her to play, sports were always her preference. 

“Am I… Am I chill?” Nicole blinked, taking a few seconds to register the word. It was one of those new terms kids liked to use. But she wasn’t lost, she could understand it by context. It happened to be the funniest assumption in the world. “Not really” she was very much on the opposite side of the chill spectrum. Anxiety-ridden. “But I’m cool with any name… Sloane” the name felt strange on her tongue, not because it was a bad name. She thought using someone’s name came with an associated familiarity. A familiarity she didn’t have with this girl.

Nicole glanced down at Pax with a smile, asking a little more patience before they could go on their walk. “Oh no, no— not about the drawings. They’re great, really” at least in her opinion, but they had established she was no expert. “I didn’t realize–” she fidgeted with the pink leash in her hand, gaze following Sloane as she folded and put away her things. “Right. I’m…I’m gonna say it and you’ll think… you’ll look at me weird but,” it was okay. It’s not like she was letting the girl down. Sloane’s opinion of her couldn’t be too high anyway, not after she peered into her sketchbook. And maybe not caring was part of her progress. “When I– My first thought when I saw those drawings was that… you were in some kinda…cult” she scrunched up her face, anticipating the laugh that was sure to follow. Could anyone blame her though? It seemed like every week there was a new cult around town. 

“I mean, there are literally splashes of paint on a wall in a museum. Somebody tied a banana to a string and had it just swinging around on a fan. Everyone calls it art.” Sloane shrugged. Really, she was perplexed as to why those things counted, especially when there was so much talent out there, but who was she to judge them for what they found beautiful? Though, the banana part really confused her, and so did the smashed tin cans that wrote out SWEET! That she had seen on a museum’s website. She was sure it was New York. It was almost always New York. 

The part of Sloane that was confused by Nicole’s counter-question quickly became amused. If she was so hilariously taken aback by the art in her notebook, it was no wonder that she wasn’t chill. Sloane needed a little more fuel to spin Nicole in circles, but it was clear that she was just generally confused, or maybe concerned about something that Sloane couldn’t see. To be fair, White Crest was a place where most should be cautious. She’d gone years judging those around her for not being more careful 

Once Nicole started to backtrack, Sloane felt herself relax. If it wasn’t about the art and how bad it was (even though Sloane knew it wasn’t), then what the hell was it about? Nicole seemed nervous, her expression reflecting it not only in the visible knot of her eyebrows, but her body language, too. “I’m already looking at you a little weird, and you’re looking at me a little weird. We’re a couple of weirdos on the outskirts of the woods, big whoop.” Sloane folded her arms across her chest and tilted her head to the side as she waited for Nicole to reveal what it was that bothered her so much. Once the words split through the space between them, Sloane’s eyes widened slightly before she let out a laugh. “I’m a lot of things, but I can guarantee you that I’m not in a fucking cult.” Could being fae be considered in a cult? Maybe some people would think that way. “I really just like art and weird things that maybe some other people are like, yucked out by, it’s not some weird conspiracy thing.” Sloane grabbed her notebook again and shoved it towards Nicole. “You can look through the whole thing if you want. There’s a lot more than just bones and dead animals.” 

“That’s not…” Was it? Nicole narrowed her eyes, searching for signs that Sloane was lying. And though she could never be completely sure, it didn’t look like it. Which was even more concerning. “That can’t be true, right? People fall for that shit?” A banana and a string. If that was the case, then her kitchen counter was filled with art. 

 It wasn’t something Nicole randomly came up with, being in a cult. Ever since that damn tree, she felt as if everyone was talking about new insane figures to worship at all times. And though she looked completely ridiculous or paranoid to this kid, in the end, it was worth it just to see how completely baffled she appeared to be by the assumption. She winced slightly at her laugh, embarrassed, but the pressure in her chest eased. Sloane was safe. 

“Well… good,” Nicole chewed on the corner of her bottom lip, toying with the leash. Her tongue grew heavy as she contemplated assuring Sloane that cults weren’t in her mind for no reason. But that would mean– “I, uh. Almost lost…my best friend. To a cult. Sort of–” she murmured before the familiar urge to build her walls could conquer her. The truth was a lot more nuanced, as was often the case. Solomon had been a victim yet offender too, she knew that. It was better to simplify it. She didn’t want Sloane to think ill of him. “He got sucked into one of those. Almost didn’t make it”. She clenched her jaw. He didn't, her memory cruelly reminded her. She held his charred heart in her hands. Help bury him in Virgil’s garden. For weeks, she was consumed by her grief until, against all expectations, he was reborn. She let out a breath, throat tightening at the memories. Her body and mind agreed that it was all she could say. “So, I’m– I’m…I’m glad you’re just a kid who likes art and weird shit. Really” she forced a smile, surprisingly relieved to have a notebook shoved in her face. 

“I’ll take your word for it,” Nicole said calmly, taking a moment to appreciate the drawing before her eyes. Again, she was no expert, but anyone who could draw with that much detail was an artist in her mind. Fuck bananas and strings. “Or maybe you can show me more when…” what was his– “Steve. When Steve and Pax meet to play”. If being a weirdly paranoid woman had not scared off Sloane yet, of course.

“People fall for anything.” Sloane shrugged. That wasn’t a lie. “It’s called… subjective. I think that’s what people say. I just say people like what they like, even if it’s a banana flying around from a ceiling fan on a string.” Nicole still seemed fairly perplexed by the idea of art, but it wasn’t her job to explain the ins and outs, even if Sloane herself didn’t actually know or care about them. 

Just as Sloane was about to ask Nicole if that’s all she had to do to convince her that she wasn’t in a cult, her mouth snapped shut. She hadn’t anticipated such openness from the woman, especially given her cautious nature. Even if Sloane thought of the question as outlandish, it was clearly a sore spot for Nicole. Sloane wanted to pretend that she didn’t actually feel remorse for creating a joke out of it in her head, but there was slight remorse. “Oh.” The word tasted sour. She should say more than that. The promise of fate lifted to the roof of her mouth and flattened against her tongue, her mother’s teachings clouding her ability to make sense of the situation as anything other than what it was; sad. “I’m sorry that you had to go through that— that your friend had to go through that.” Sloane shifted uncomfortably beneath Nicole’s gaze. Sloane could be empathetic, she was capable of it, but there was something that tugged at her. If it was meant to be, it was meant to be. “I’m glad that… everything is… better now?” Sloane offered. Was it? She watched Nicole carefully before nodding. Sarcasm was absent from her tone as she spoke. “I’m just a girl who likes to draw. No weird… cult things here.” 

Nicole’s expression shifted and Sloane relaxed slightly. She was surprised to hear that Nicole actually wanted to meet again. She thought that was out of politeness. Sloane shrugged before a small, but soft smile pulled at her lips. “Uh, sure.” No, that wasn’t right. Sloane cleared her throat. “I mean, yeah, that sounds… nice. Steve likes people more than he likes other dogs, but he knows how to be polite.” Sort of like herself. “I’ll bring my other sketchbook. It has less dead things and more birds and people. Maybe I can draw Pax for you.” Sloane smiled at Nicole, still taken slightly aback by the change in tone and the way that she had shared such a big part of herself. 

Nicole only hummed. Partly in agreement, partly because she had ran out of things to say. Maybe she was being too judgy. She had fallen for dumb shit in the past too. It was possible that everyone needed something to hold on to, to made them feel things, even if it escaped her understanding. Maybe that something was a string and a banana. Even though it sounded—

Sloane’s reaction almost made her want to turn around and leave. Nicole’s stomach sank with dread. Pity. That’s why she hated opening up. Why it was always preferable to keep everything lock inside. But she inhaled slowly, taking in the discomfort, bearing it for a little longer. There was more room for it nowadays. She needed to feel the weight of that awkward stare, get familiar with those sympathetic words, over and over again. Or else being open would never get easier. “He’s okay” she lied, mind drifting to his current situation. One that again, she could do nothing about. Despite swearing she would. Same fucking mistake she made last time. But she didn’t let the anger flare again, because this was about the girl and the relief she should feel knowing there were no cults involved. “Thank you, though”.

Which meant moving fast, closing those vulnerable conversations and focusing on the superficial ones. Nicole had gotten better at that too. “I’d like that” she looked down at Pax, who had done a good job being patient and deserved to go on his promised walk. He’d look cute as a drawing. “My second impression is a lot better, promise” she wasn’t sure if that was the case, but coming prepared always reduced her general anxiety. Eyes flickered to the hood of the car on last time, before finding Sloane again. She gave her nod. “Keep your books safe” there was a playfulness to her voice as she offered one final piece of advice, before heading towards the park. And shit, she really was starting to sound like Leah, wasn’t she?

[corpse--diem]

Whiskey Lullaby | Nicole & Erin

TIMING: Current PARTIES: @nicsalazar LOCATION: Strawford Park & Nichols’ Funeral Home SUMMARY: Erin finds a drunk, distraught Nicole in the cemetery and eventually takes home a poor stray cat.   CONTENT WARNINGS: alcoholism tw, family death mentions

It was the sloppy step leading Nicole to lose her balance what brought her back to reality. Confusion was etched across her features. Exactly where on earth did her wandering lead her? It was as if she had blinked and appeared somewhere else. In the fog of her mind, retracing her steps was difficult. She had been at The Artisan not too long ago, right? Her head was spinning in a familiar way. Yes, she had been drinking. A fucking hypocrite, she was. Terrified of losing control yet spending most of her days drunk enough to black out. But how else was she suppose to numb all the recent pain?

 Nicole shook her head —a terrible idea— hoping to regain focus. Looking around, it became clear that her unsteady gait had led her to the cemetery near the botanical garden, where Solomon used to work at. Solomon. As soon as she was reminded of him, she couldn’t unsee his charred body.

 Nicole stumbled through beautiful mausoleums, wondering why she even wanted to be in a place like that. If she was in the mood for feeling sorry for herself, it explained being drunk in the first place. She came to a stop at a particularly simple grave. Her face wrinkled, trying to read one of the plaques. The loving inscription reminded her why she hated cemeteries. Jealousy. She wished she had something like that to mourn her family. A place to bring flowers in November. A place to sit and talk to them. Was that too much to ask? A bitter huff escaped her lips. It wasn’t fucking fair. 

 The name Nicole had been staring at was covered in dirt when her boot kicked the ground. Her stomach twisted with something akin to relief. Fleeting, but comforting. Fuck all these people. Fuck them for leaving their loved ones behind. She repeated the action, this time with more intention. Too caught up on her misery, she missed the figure approaching. When something brushed against her shoulder, she turned with such hurry that her legs got tangled and ended up tumbling to the ground.

 One of the things Erin hadn’t anticipated when accepting Josephine’s offer was the… adjustment period. Even now, months and months later. Muted by the time she’d spent locked away, it was like she was trying to relearn some of the skills she’d only gotten adjusted to before the kidnapping. The noise was taking some getting used to. It was what she called the bright, red spots that filled her consciousness on a daily basis. Anger. This town was brimming with it. They pulled her attention from her day-to-day, threatening to pull her away if she let it, like she was literally a moth floating towards a bright light. The draw was foreign and natural all at the same time but blinking off in the middle of a funeral because she couldn’t keep her attention where it should be wasn’t ideal. But this one? Oh, this one was raw and bright and hard to ignore. And close. 

 She barely closed the door on the last client of the day when she gave in. One moment she was in the funeral home and the next she stood in the middle of a cemetery, soft earth beneath her feet. She regained her bearings, thankful the woman had her back turned to her, not interested in explaining her sudden appearance to a stranger. Erin had no doubt in her mind this was who she was looking for. If it wasn’t the rage dripping from her every pore, it was the way she furiously kicked dirt against the gravestone in front of her. 

 “Hey! Stop that!” She called out, a more natural mortician-shaped instinct kicking in. She didn’t hear her and Erin yelled a little louder, hurrying to grab her shoulder. The woman ended up on the ground and Erin hopped back, wincing. “Shit, sorry--I didn’t mean to startle you. Here,” She reached her hand out, offering her a hand and a softer, timid smile. “Not sure what that gravestone did to you but, speaking from experience, messing with it’s not going to make you feel much better.”

Nicole always landed on her feet. Even drunk, she had managed to avoid slipping incidents before. But it seemed she drank past her limits, erasing all gracefulness in her movements. She end up on the ground, spitting dirt off her mouth. Her senses so clouded that she didn’t pick up on the woman’s presence before she touched her. Where were her heightened senses or whatever? Had she been sober, she would’ve been alarmed to be caught off guard. 

 “Jes… fuckin…you…you just— sneak behind people?” Puñeta, Nicole cursed under her breath, smacking the woman’s helping hand away. She’d stay on the ground as much as she wanted, thank you very much. Partly out of stubborness, but mostly because she didn't trust herself not to topple to the ground again. And that would be embarrassing. Her eyes closed briefly, attempting to shake away the vertigo. “Kinda was… actually” she looked up at the sound of the woman’s voice. 

 She began rising, slowly. First on her knees, then one foot after the other. She wiped the dirt off her jacket, but the unsteadiness wouldn’t go. Neither would her inexplicable resentment at the plaque. In fact, Nicole was tempted to smash it with her own fist. Better a plaque than someone’s face, right? She scoffed. “You’ve never…what’s the wo— mis… misdirected your anger before or—?” the questioning tone was only for the woman rethinkr her own words. “Cus then you get why I wanna do it” she met the woman’s eyes with a the scowl, her expression quickly faltered as she jumped to conclusions. “Ah, fuck— you...you work here or som— right? Gonna be in trouble?”

 “Can’t imagine you would’ve heard me in the middle of your--” Erin gestured vaguely to the sight she had found herself upon. “Whatever that was.” The woman smacked her hand away and she pulled them back into herself, tucking her hands behind her back. Right. Angry people don’t like to be bothered, spooked, and then have their personal space be infringed upon. Erin was checking all of those boxes already. Without Josephine’s supervision and the unsteadiness the last few months had found her, she was already stumbling. But she knew people. Knew how to talk to them. How to navigate uncomfortable conversations and people at their most vulnerable--her entire life and her chosen career had trained her for that. Just because she had an added magical element to add to the discourse now didn’t mean she suddenly forgot every other skill she’d learned before this. It just made things… trickier. But this she knew, and this she clung to as the woman continued to grumble at her. 

 Erin perked a brow in the other woman’s direction and nodded, glancing at the target of said misdirected anger. “Not judging. Takes a lot for a person to start swinging at granite and dirt. You’re not the first and you’re definitely not going to be the last.” She gave a pause, letting her words sink in. Most people wept at graves. Some cursed the deceased or the sky above them. She’d seen it all. This act of outrage was nothing new, even if it now held promise for something she could help her with.

 “As someone who’s buried a good chunk of the people in this cemetery, it’s kind of my duty as a funeral director to put a stop to this kind of thing when I see it. I’m sure you get it.” Her eyes turned sheepishly towards the ground. “But as someone who’s also taken swings at a gravestone when I couldn’t get the real thing in front of me--I get it. So no. You’re not in trouble.” Her arms crossed over her chest and she nodded at the woman, then glanced towards the gravesite she’d turned her anger towards. “Did she do something to you personally?”

  In some ways, Nicole was still able to grasp the wrong in her actions. Though the heavy weight at the pit of her stomach could mean anything, at this point. In spite of that, she shot a pissed off look at the woman, waiting for her to respond and ready to argue back. It was in the blink of an eye that Nicole realized she hadn’t been listening at all. The woman’s mouth kept moving, yet her attention had drifted who knows where. She held her hand up in front of the woman’s face. “Hol- hold on” she huffed, frowning at herself. She didn’t want to be seen like this. Anger and shame were forming a dangerous combination inside her. “Sorry I wasn’t— I didn’t…” she trailed off, unable to construct a meaningful reply. 

 Eyes narrowed in concentration, Nicole made sure to pay attention to the woman’s next words. A funeral director, shit. That wasn’t good (still, she didn’t feel bad about it). But at least the woman understood. And maybe it was that insight that kept Nicole right in front of her instead of stumbling away. Holding a breath in, she shook her head and grit her teeth. She didn’t want to talk. 

 Except she did, because if there was one thing booze was good for was connecting her brain to her mouth in a way that was never possible when sober. Because her head was a piece of shit. Alcohol couldn’t stop the way her body reacted to anger though. The knot in her throat growing painfully tight as she prepared to speak. Or the tears rushing so quickly to her eyes that she couldn’t help but to feel weak. The pressure on her ribcage, begging for some sort of relief. 

 Nicole shook her head again. The woman did nothing to her, personally. “She… she had— she had… people” people who cared enough to give her a place to rest. “A place…she has. She has a place” where her family could come talk to her whenever they missed her. The woman in front of her became a blur because of the tears she refused to spill, “she… uh— belongs somewhere…to someone. My fam— I…I didn’t get that.” Her chest burned wildly and really, there was nothing stopping her from taking it out on the plaque again.

  It wasn’t clear yet if there was anything Erin truly could do for this woman. Part of her wanted to dig deeper, find the root of the problem so she could ease some of that raw pain clawing its way to the surface. The other part felt the slow creep of doubt begin to settle, no longer sure that her special type of assistance was warranted or needed here. But she could still help somehow. She hadn’t been shooed off yet. Maybe this alcohol fueled tantrum was some kind of cry for help, and even if it was against her better judgment and general safety, but apparently she had a soft spot for drunken brunettes with sad eyes. 

 And you don’t. Erin didn’t need to say it out loud. The implication was clear. She felt her chest soften a little bit more. “There’s one thing you have that she doesn’t,” she started, nodding towards the plaque. She leaned down, brushing some of the dirt and grass that the other woman kicked up off of the raised name. “Not to sound like some philosophical old white guy but—you’ve got a chance. You’re alive. There’s still time for you to get that.” She shrugged, standing up again, wiping her hands on the front of her pants. “Just a thought.” 

 Her brows furrowed slightly as she watched her quietly for another few moments, contemplating her next question. “I have some fresh coffee brewed over at the house. If that sounds like something you’re interested in.” She quirked a small smile. “Change of beverage might do you some good too.”

With every word the woman spoke, a new wave of shame crept into Nicole’s chest. Right, silver linings. She should be thankful, shouldn't she? She was jealous of a fucking tomb, how low was that? It began to dawn on her just how pathetic she had to look, but just as quickly as that thought came, she shook her head in disagreement. No. This stranger was spewing bullshit. She didn’t know how recent the pain was. How she had finally come to terms with the fact that her family was gone and there was nothing she could’ve done about it. This time, the grieving was different. Old and new, and truly final. She hadn't anticipated the intensity of it. She hadn’t anticipated Alcher and Solomon to go so soon after that. She was back to the beginning. Again. She inched closer, hoping to look intimidating. "Stupid fucking thought," she wanted to scream at the woman, but she only slurred her words. “Fuck off” she snarled at her offer and turned around. 

 A few steps into her drunken stumble, Nicole came to a halt. “No… no wait- wait a min—” She wasn’t sure if she was speaking to the woman of herself, really. If her survival instincts guiding her to safety or was she just incredibly indecisive? What did she want? Wreck that tomb, yes. She walked backwards, coming to face with the woman again. Shit. So what then? Her truck was nowhere to be found, and her phone had died hours ago. She didn’t wanna bother Leah again, or call anyone else. Her stomach sank with guilt. Right, people who cared— she had those now. Even if she had lost two of them recently. Why couldn’t she be grateful? A shaky breath left her lips, the kind that could either presage a tearful outburst or trigger her anger. She covered her eyes with her palms, wishing the tears would stop. “Not… coffee. It uh— it…” her mouth opened a few times trying to explain that she didn't drink coffee. “Get shaky— Water or…or—” Hell, at this point she needed a couch to crash on. 

 It became increasingly clear that this woman, whatever her problem was, didn’t want Erin’s help. That was something Erin had also been learning. Just because she had the resources and capabilities didn’t mean she was going to be welcomed with open arms. To receive help, someone had to want help. And at the ‘fuck off’ grumbled her way, she realized that this was probably not the case. At least, not the exact kind of help Erin could offer–the magical variety. But magic wasn’t always the solution, as she knew very well too now. Right now she just needed, well–water. Maybe an ear. A reminder that she wasn’t alone. Little things she, or anyone, was capable of providing. “Water. I can do that too,” she nodded, despite the tight ball forming in her stomach. There was helping and then there was inviting a literal stranger into her home. The front porch, at least. She hadn’t decided if she was going to actually bring her inside, which she felt was fair. But maybe this was progress. A small step towards her own recovery and inching towards trusting the world around her again. She took a small step forward, a hint of uncertainty in her own eyes, but she forced a small smile and held her hand out. “I’m Erin, by the way. Not sure I had the chance to introduce myself while you were fighting that gravestone.”

A damn rollercoaster. That’s what it felt like to Nicole. Raw anger easily manipulated into gentle appreciation just by someone's attempt at kindness. Real fucking touching. The offer of water pulled at her already vulnerable heartstrings. She glanced at the woman, teary-eyed and surprised that despite her previous tantrum she was standing there still, ready to help. Humans were good. And she needed them, needed people. The reminder came to her from somewhere deep down. And it almost sounded like Alcher. She wasn’t going to bear it all in private anymore, she promised herself that. “Okay… water” she gave the smallest nod, too timid for someone who had tried to take her anger out on someone’s grave.

 “Erin…” Nicole stared at her with a look of utter concentration. Erin, she repeated. Uncertain if she would remember when morning came. But she would try her hardest to. “Erin…” she didn’t realize the woman’s hand was still extended towards her. Oh. Her name, right? Introductions. “Ah, hmm… Nico—” she shook her hand briefly, the grip weak and elusive. As much as she’d gotten better at touching those she cared for, strangers were an entirely different concept. 

 She stepped forward, willing now to let Erin guide her to that water she offered, but as she looked back at the plaque she tried to destroy, guilt gnawed at her again. “I’m… Im sorry, for… um,” Nicole lifted a shoulder, motioning behind her. “I’m not— this isn’t…” but it was her, wasn’t it? Alcohol just made it easier to show her true colors.  “I’ll fix it… okay? I will. Will clean… the whole—” the sentence slipped from her, but she circled around the graveyard with her finger. She would. She knew pretty well how annoying it was to find your working place dirty. 

 Nicole had no real sense of the time that  passed after she last spoke. Could’ve been just minutes or seconds. But when her conscience returned, she was walking alongside Erin. Taking advantage of that drunk honesty, she decided to pick up the conversation again, skipping about fifteen chapters in the process. “Know the— You know what hurt the most? Blame… I blamed me— myself”.

There was so much anger, so much hurt, radiating from this woman. Erin didn’t need any special abilities to see how it moved through her as fiercely as the alcohol. Knew how the ebb and flow of it wore you down, making those emotional burdens even heavier to carry. And to carry it alone? No wonder she found her in this kind of state. Damn it. She couldn’t back out now even if she wanted to, could she? Abandon this poor woman at the height of her drunken meltdown, shouting at the unfairness of being alone in the world? Her arms crossed closely against herself as they walked towards the house, spikes of anxiety still needling at her insides. Erin hummed softly in amusement. “Damn right you’re going to fix it.” She shot Nicole a small smirk. “You may not remember me or much of this by tomorrow but unfortunately for you, I don’t have that luxury.” 

 Erin listened quietly, brows narrowed in concentration as she tried to piece together what the woman, Nico, was mumbling about. Felt like she was missing a few pieces, or a dozen. “Blamed yourself for what?” She asked as they crossed the street to the funeral home. No. She wasn’t ready to bring a stranger inside, but the porch offered solace from the weather and a place to sit and rest. That would have to be enough. She led her up the stairs, an arm out ready to brace the drunken woman should she need it. “Sit tight? I’ll be right back with some water. Are you sure you’re not hungry? I–” Right. Crap. Food. They didn’t have much of it in the house, not more than what they figured Cass would probably snack on should she stop by. “I think we’ve got cookies? It might help soak up whatever you were drinking.”

"I thought..." Her lips quivered, but she managed to keep it together by biting down on the inside of her cheek. Nicole had never been able to speak about it. Not even Alcher or Leah, who had seen her worst regret unfold heard her reflect on it. Her body swayed to the side, but it collided with Erin’s shoulder, keeping her straight. There was comfort in the contact, enough to spur her to continue. “If… if it was my fault then,” the words were close, yet always out of reach. There was really no way to talk about it. “At least I had— I controlled” she shrugged, giving up before really trying. “But it was never my— how can it be that life’s just… Bad shit happens just cause? How’s… how’s any of that fair?”

Nicole succeeded sitting on the stairs with as much grace as she could muster. Was she hungry? She couldn’t tell. She thought she ate something for lunch, but she may have been misremembering. She was already pregaming by then. Her head bobbed, unable to commit to a nod or a shake. Yes, please. The burning in her throat wouldn’t let her eat anyway, but on the chance she could, anything would do.

She leaned against the handrail, world spinning for a moment as she waited for the woman to come back. Nicole barely registered the hot tears falling once again. She heard the footsteps behind a moment later, but didn’t bother to check. At least Erin had come back, like she said she would. She felt it again, as she eyed the glass of water from the corner of her eye. Appreciation. Another wall crumbled, and her throat tightened. She wanted— no, needed to speak. Words she had thought a million times before, but she finally found herself uninhibited enough to utter. She sighed, so heavy it made her shiver. “I’m… I’m— I…so tired, Erin” The kind of exhaustion a good night of sleep couldn’t fix. She needed a lifetime, possibly.

Maybe if she slept that long, the sensation of Alcher’s warm hand against her cheek wouldn’t be so vivid in her head, nor would her last words replay as often. Maybe– maybe she wouldn’t have to picture Solomon’s blackened heart in her hands anymore. She wouldn’t have to keep torturing herself with the fact that she failed to intervene, that she let him go on his reckless tirade. Most of all, she wouldn’t have to be reminded that she didn’t do enough for her family. That she never set on to find the truth. Sleeping would quiet her mind, in ways alcohol had tried but failed.

“It’s not,” Erin answered curtly, harsher than she intended, but even if she didn’t completely understand the reasoning behind this woman’s grief, she knew how cutting that unfairness was. “Bad shit just happens. Always has, always will.” Grim, she knew, but it was also true. “I’ve learned it’s how you deal with it that matters most, you know?” She wasn’t sure if she was being truly helpful, but the young woman wasn’t exactly giving her much more than the fragmented thoughts her mind would let past her lips. It was like a storm blowing hard and treacherous, and Erin grasped at whatever blew her way. It wasn’t much but even as vague as it was, she could get an idea of what she was feeling. 

She was as quick as she could be, grabbing the largest glass she could find and filled it with fresh, cold water. Grabbed the sleeve of cookies too, just in case. She was relieved to find Nico again, as desolate and tragic looking as she’d left her, but still in the same place. She offered the sustenance and took a seat on one of the chairs on the porch. “I know you don’t know me, and maybe that’s a positive in this situation. A lot of times, I’ll have clients pour their life’s stories to me while I’m at work. I think being a stranger helps. Makes it easier or something, because it’s less personal.” She paused, leaning forward onto her knees, the pain shrouding her guest so palpable she felt like she could run her fingers along the edges. “What I mean, is if you wanted to talk about it–” she shrugged, gesturing towards Nicole. “You can talk about it. I don’t mind. Sometimes you need to let it out. Or hit things.” The corner of her mouth turned up momentarily. “Or both.” She paused a long moment, watching the woman quietly again. “If you have somewhere you’d rather be though, I can see to it that you get there safely as well. If you want. Just–let me know what you need, okay?”

Nicole’s shoulder slumped, hopeless as Erin’s verdict came. She knew that already, of course. She wasn’t exactly known for her positive outlook on life. But hearing it from someone else always made things sink deeper. Really become unquestionable. There was no rhyme or reason for any of the terrible things people had to go through. Life was just relentless. Had her mind been sharper, she could’ve asked Erin what experiences led her to that conclusion. The woman had experience, that was obvious even to her. Living in White Crest ensured everyone had to endure awful things every now and then. She wasn’t dealing with it very well, she wanted to point out, but it didn’t feel necessary. Her being drunk out of her ass was evidence enough.

Nicole  sat quietly for a moment, glass firmly between her hands.Her eyelids grew heavy from exhaustion, but every sip kept her from dozing off. Her tears had dried by the time Erin offered a friendly ear. She pulled her knees closer to her chest, tilting her head as she tried to say no. “I don’t—  wouldn’t know… where to start” if they stayed there until she untangled the mess of thoughts that was her head, then Erin wouldn’t even get a chance to sleep. And after the patience she had show, Nicole didn’t want to repay her like that. But hopefully one day, she’d take the stranger up on the offer. “But thank you. And— sorry… for… for—" her shoulders rose an inch, and she wondered if the woman would understand she was still thinking about that plaque.

Tentatively, Nicole reached for one of the cookies, examining it as she pondered Erin’s next question. Truthfully, she wanted to be with Leah, but she didn’t want to show up drunk to her place again. She was mourning too, she didn’t deserve the burden. A hug. That was probably what she needed. What she would’ve asked for if it didn’t feel like too big of a request for the woman whose cemetery she just tried to vandalize. She took a small bite, testing how much she could handle. “Can… could I stay here?” Nicole wouldn’t move even if she tried. Her body too stiff and cold to give it a go. But she had learned to fit much more uncomfortable places. The stairs were a gift compared to that. Her eyes closed for a moment, breathing slowing down. “I’ll just—I’ll… I’ll—” she mumbled, feeling safe enough to let go with Erin watching over from her chair. 

Erin couldn’t blame her. In her state, it was surely like trying to unjumble whatever mess she was sorting through with thick gloves on. Useless and uncooperative. Maybe another time then. Erin nodded, gently waving off her apologies. “Make it up to me by making good on your word, okay? Maybe even, if you’re up to it, I can get a little more out of you sometime. Before you guzzle down a whole bottle, huh?” At her further question, Erin felt her entire body tense. Stay the night. Somehow it felt like she’d taken home a stray cat who needed more help than it could give itself at the moment. But this one was human shaped–drunk and disorderly, sure, but still Nicole had a mind of her own. And as the alcohol wore off, who would she be? What would her intentions be then? Erin would be allowing a stranger to sleep in her home. 

Even as the red flags flashed in her mind, maybe self-induced by recent traumas, there was a stronger pull that trusted in this stranger. Maybe she shouldn’t have but she’d already allowed her here. She knew where she lived–and the woman could barely walk. It’d be irresponsible to let her wander back off into the streets. She ran a tense hand across her cheek before she nodded. “Yeah, yeah… you can stay here. I don’t sleep much, and I’m up early, so I’m hoping you’ll find your way home before I open up shop. Last thing I need is some hungover stranger straggling through the funeral parlor while I’m with a client.” She smiled to soften her words but she’d meant every word. Her kindness had limits. ”Take your time out here. Drink some water. Have some cookies. And when you’re ready you can meet me inside, okay?” She’d have to get the couch set up. Warn Marley that they were going to have company for the evening. But even as the stirring in her stomach swirled, she gave Nicole one last smile, and it settled just slightly at the sight of the broken woman. Something told her she meant them no harm, and maybe it was a naïve thought to have in the presence of those glassy eyes and distraught features, but it was something she had to believe in. She wanted to believe it. Wanted to believe that not all strangers meant her harm or were anything like the ones she’d cast away to pay for their sins. And as she started gathering things for Nicole’s bed, she felt sure in her decision. It was a nice reminder, really, that she didn’t always need her gifts to help. Not even a stranger. 

[kadavernagh]

Spirit & Bone || Coyote Exorcism

TIMING: Same time as Fury & Flesh LOCATION: Regan’s cabin  CHARACTERS: Regan, Lil, Leah, Ari, and Nicole SUMMARY: A group has organized to free Regan from her coyote problem. But the coyote won’t go easy, and has some tricks up its sleeve -- or really Regan’s. Will the coyote meet its match in an exorcism, especially if it’s an ACME brand one?  CONTENT WARNINGS: Animal cruelty (mentioned/implied)

The coyote was restless. Regan didn’t know why, and it offered no explanation. Sometimes it just had a feeling. It sensed things no banshee, let alone human, could ever dream of. The scent of sweat on the skin of nearby hikers, creeping too close to the cabin. Or the sound of a hawk crushing a songbird in its claws half a mile away. Today it felt threatened, caged. And it hated feeling caged. It was desperate enough for some of its nerves to sink themselves into Regan, latching to her skin. She couldn’t shake it off any better than the coyote.

Something was going to happen. But perhaps it was the fruits of their labors, rather than anything to fear. For once, she was relieved she had already asked Emilio to patrol nearby. This was the most delicate part of the ceremony they were to do – the laying of the last bones on the mound of death they had been building for months. If they were interrupted, the whole thing was sure to unravel, decomposing to nothingness before the coyote’s hollow eyes. That couldn’t happen. This was its only path to a peaceful rest. Most of the bones in her vast collection were in place, now. She had shuffled back from the mound to the cabin, collecting the remaining skunk and raccoon bones in her arms.

Something… there was something. The coyote seemed to freeze, a deep chill emanating out from the bag its skull was swaddled in. Regan delicately set down the bones and scooped the bag up in their stead, holding it close. What did it sense? What was it? 

Regan’s head turned sharply toward the door, eyes narrowed and a scream simmering in her lungs. Someone is there. Multiple someones. Its thoughts were like chattering teeth in her head. “I know.” Regan replied. We will deal with them. “I know.” She repeated, this time with finality.

Lilian had been quiet most of the time going to the cabin that they were approaching, her eyes focused on the road ahead. She was tired, dead tired from the ghosts and exorcisms that seemed to follow her around these days clinging to her. Her usual up-beat nature was tampered down knowing that this event wasn’t going to be easy. She didn’t know all the moving parts, but in fairness she rarely asked questions about the details of things. Simply, there were things that were easier not to know. Exorcists were called to be focused on a goal, not wondering about the contents of a soul. Not wondering what the coyotes wanted, even if she felt something sour about it in her mouth. 

Nodding to the others softly Lil said in a low voice, “ Is this the cabin? If so - she’s probably going to go after me first if the ghost realizes what I am. If you can get her in a chair I can draw a circle quickly. It won’t be able to get out of it then, and probably won’t be able to jump. Are we ready? ” She hoped at least. From what she was told, this seemed to be a spirit not a demon, but - well it was worth a shot at least. Her left hand curled around the chalk in her palm while her right held her dagger hoping not to use it. 

Leah could not wrap her mind around all the ways what they were about to do could go wrong, and she hated the feeling.  She had the privilege and the resources to always have a plan in a situation like this.  Or-, multiple plans, really.  Plan A, and plan B, and even plans C-ZZ when all the previous ones went wrong.  She could research, meticulously and with finality, all the ways that situations had gone wrong before, and all the ways to avoid those wrongs before they happened.  

But there was nothing concrete about this, at least not in the limited Ramirez scribary.

It wasn’t unheard of for new situations to arise, of course, but it was the first time in this life at least that Leah had to deal with it.  She gripped Nicole’s hand in hers tightly, uncomfortable with the feeling.  Regan was going to be angry.  She would have been angry being surprised like this anyway, but the possession made that anger entirely too unpredictable.  She hoped the real Regan would fight through whatever was tainting her mind, but couldn’t imagine how hard that must be.  She looked over at Lil with a nod at her question, and then back at the familiar door. “We’ll do our best.  I don’t have much to offer in strength but I can try to back her into a corner via temperature.  What are you thinking?”, she asked, turning to Ari.  Ari, who she hadn’t seen since their memorial for Alcher.  She had to remember to invite that girl over for dinner or something, lest all their interactions be through traumatic events involving mutual loved ones.  The thought made her look to Nicole again, letting out a breath.  “Maybe I can distract her somehow… maybe you two can each take a side.”

When Nicole and Leah had asked her to come along to help with some ritual, Ari hadn’t thought much of it. When it came to helping people, she rarely did. Just yes and action and that was that. The details hadn’t fully registered given the hazy state she existed in most of the time these days, but in the moment, she knew she’d know what to do. When it came to a fight, her instincts were pretty sharp. Being a predator with years of training had its perks or something. During the walk, the wolf hadn’t been paying all that much attention or she would have noticed the route seemed familiar. 

Once they were at the door of the cabin it clicked and Ari had to swallow back the panic that was rising in her. Why were they at Regan’s cabin? Maybe she really should have asked some questions, but if they were here to help Regan, it was probably fine. She was sure it wouldn’t count as repaying her debt to the banshee. Or maybe it would. She couldn’t really say. The cabin felt just as cold and sterile as it had the last time she was here. Death and wood being the primary smell. Leah’s voice pulled her out of her head. “This is Regan’s cabin,” she said, slowly, “Are we here to help her?” 

Nicole had no stakes in this situation. She didn’t even know the woman about to be exorcised. But her conscience wouldn't have allowed her to sleep at night if these women risked their lives for nothing. She had to be there to make sure Leah's bones remained intact, that Lil didn't exert herself like she almost did banishing the termites, or that Ari didn’t attempt anything reckless. Alright, she had stakes but they were different. If they needed an exit plan, she wouldn't hesitate to make it happen. No ifs or buts.

Nicole didn’t know this woman, but a beast's spirit inhabiting your body was not something she wished on anyone, even if the circumstances weren't quite the same. “Just give me enough time to leave to circle” she glanced at Lil. They had been an unconventional team against the ghost termites, but an effective one. She trusted her to get it right. And it shouldn’t be a problem for her and Ari to muscle the woman into a chair as long as she didn’t have reinforcements inside. Like those awful coyotes they fought in her garden. “We can try that” She gave Leah a curt nod, but squeezed her hand in reassurance.

Planning and executing were two different things though, especially under pressure. And so, standing right outside the cabin, ready to open the door, Nicole hoped for the best but prepared for the worst. Ariana’s question registered in her brain right as she pushed the door open. She did a double take. Wait. Did they not tell her the name? “Yeah… Why’s that—” her words died in her throat once she peered inside the slight opening, shivers running down her spine as the scent of decay flooded her lungs.

She would not get the door. It wasn’t even locked, anyway – she had only meant to stop in for the rest of the bones. Bounding over to do so wouldn’t stymie anyone with steely determination. And Regan had a feeling this was no lost hiker. She could hear them. Voices outside. Multiple, familiar, but she couldn’t place them. So she froze, letting the coldness of the bones in her arms fill her as she stared at the door knowing it would move at any moment. Her wings flicked against her back, the only anxious betrayal of her composure. The skull commanded her to be prepared. A scream whipped up like a storm inside of her lungs, and Regan held it in her chest. Movement. The door getting nudged. 

Leah. The scream seared her intercostals, wanting to be belted squarely at the librarian. There were others, too – Lil, that child Ariana, someone Regan didn’t know – but none of them enraged her quite as much. Leah’s presence said enough. She knew what this was about. “One chance,” Regan said, the edges of the scream leaking into her voice, “You all have one chance to leave.” One of the skunk bones – a darling scapula – shattered in her hands in response to the vibration. She gave the remaining bones a loving clench and then sat them down, opting to keep the more valuable skull in her bag. It would be safe there. It would always be safe with her. “Do you understand? We will do the same to your bones.”

It was already happening so fast.  Ari’s question (which Leah was glad Nicole answered), the door swinging open, and …Regan.  Still somehow both fully herself and less herself than Leah had last seen her.  She adjusted the bag on her shoulder, filled with things for the ritual and anything else they might need.  Candles, sage, a bag of salt, tears… She hoped they wouldn’t need the tears.  Then, there was the threat, and the tell-tale sign that Regan was about to scream.   Her voice echoed around them, more ominous than the threat could ever have been.  Bones shattered in Regan’s hands, and it was almost a wonder that her own bones weren’t already cracking inside her.  With a swallow, she looked hard into Regan’s eyes. She’d heard what she thought was Regan screaming plenty of times before, but from a distance.  She knew the power her scream had.  But they couldn’t leave.  They couldn’t let Regan destroy herself anymore.

She needed to get her attention; she needed to find some way to get her to listen.  She didn’t listen back at the apartment or on the internet, and she didn’t seem primed to listen now.  So Leah had to try something different.  “Regan”, she said, both in greeting an acknowledgement.  Her nerves got the best of her, and in the blink of an eye, she flashed to her flame state and then back in an instant.  Her fire hadn’t been working properly in months, but she tried to see the silver lining of it all- maybe this would serve as a good enough distraction to Regan for the time being.  With adrenaline rushing, people’s senses went into overdrive.  Maybe the shock of seeing a friend on fire would do enough of the trick.

“I can’t even begin to imagine how scary this must be for you.  None of us can.  But there is something inside you that doesn’t belong there, Regan.  It’s not there to help you, it’s using you.  And when it’s done with you, I’m worried it will leave you with nothing left.” Regan was threatening people she loved and there was no longer a doubt in Leah’s mind that she would follow through with it.  “We first met because you needed help, Regan.  In an absolutely wild situation, you needed help.  And I came, because there are things I know about this town that are just unexplainable to most people.  And we can help you now, okay? But we can’t help you if you don’t let us.”  She took a deep breath, glancing at the women around her.  ‘If there was ever any ounce of trust you had in me that I could help you with something like this… if there was ever an inch of doubt about what’s been going on with you… then I need you to promise.  Promise me you won’t scream while we’re here.”

Leah. She did something. For a second, just a second, Regan stared at where her friend stood as her slow heart raced. There had been fire. Leah, somehow, looked as if – but that was impossible. So why did her heart sprint at the impossible? The coyote was unimpressed. But an old memory dislodged itself – Augusta’s Office of Medical Examiner going up in smoke, the flames licking at the entrance of the autopsy suite, the half-finished autopsy shielded behind her. Regan squinted at Leah, seeing if she could summon back the fire with her mind for long enough to be convinced to run. But there was nothing. Only Leah. Leah and her pleading words.

“You don’t know anything,” Regan hissed, a lightbulb popping behind her. “I gave you a –” Warning. But Leah wasn’t done. And while the coyote was tugging at her, calling on her to act, something was stopping her. But not for long. The coyote’s urgency doubled at Leah’s words, enraged that it had been detected and spoken of in such a manner. What could they do? Nothing. It wouldn’t allow it. Regan wrapped her arms around her chest, no longer confident she could contain the scream even if she wanted to. And she didn’t. Right? She didn’t. The coyote confirmed it.

This was it. She would not give up her scream. The coyote knew her for the servant and weapon that she was. And while the scream wasn’t their only asset – there were still the shadows –  it was the only one capable of causing true, physical harm. It sensed Regan’s hesitation. Only a flicker of it, but enough for the coyote to grow concerned by her cowardice. You’re better than this, it reminded her, its voice like chattering teeth in her head. It was afraid, Regan realized, too slowly and too late. Think of your training. The social tethers choked out of you. These humans don’t matter. What matters is finishing the work. 

They were intruders, interlopers. The small amount of warmth Regan felt at seeing familiar faces, the tiny gap of doubt Leah had been needling at, was wrung out of her. They might as well have been strangers. Humans interfering with things beyond their ken. The coyote pushed harder. They were an active threat. Regan’s gaze darkened as she looked at the humans. It was time to listen to the storm inside of her lungs. She released it; the scream poured out of her and filled the cabin, cracking the “crack-proof” windows and shooting small shards of glass everywhere. She barely noticed it against her own skin. Was it enough? Regan looked at the huddled forms before her. More, the coyote demanded. She pushed her lungs further, deeper, and the scream continued until finally, she was breathless. 

Regan panted, trying to see what state the threat was in. The coyote didn’t want her to. It wanted her to take the bones and run. She turned to the table and reclaimed her skunk and raccoon bones, making a beeline for the door. But as she darted by one of the humans, she slowed. Go. She stopped. Go. The coyote howled and thrashed and pushed. Regan grabbed onto the door frame, and looked toward the human she’d screamed at. Leah. The name entered her thoughts for just long enough that she could latch onto it with her fingertips. She was hurt. Of course. Because – Regan choked, a lump lodging itself in her throat. Go now. Regan slowly shook her head no.

Leah had said I need you to promise… the lump in Regan’s throat grew, and the bones fell from her hands. “I–” The brief attempt to speak came out a screech. The coyote could deny her this much. She would not be permitted to answer with a promise. It filled her head with an unearthly howl, and Regan clenched the doorframe harder but didn’t stop looking at Leah. If she tried to speak, it would be a scream. So she wouldn’t. Once more, slowly, Regan nodded – this time a yes, I promise.

Things were happening fast, questions and answers coming out quicker then Lilian knew how to really address them. Still she had nodded lightly to Nicole on making sure she got out of the circle in time. She wouldn’t put the other in that situation again, if she could help it. It hadn’t occurred to Lil that everyone didn’t know what was going on, but it was getting to the point where they just needed to trust each other and do it. 

Before Lil could say anything there was horrible noise, causing her to buckle under the sound her hands automatically putting her hands over her ears for a sound she really couldn’t hear . Stumbling backwards she felt the scream more than heard it. It knocked the wind out of her and for a moment she couldn’t think.

After a moment though, she saw Leah go up and try to talk to Regan and Lil wanted to warn her to get back. Whatever this was wasn’t good. Without a thought Lil held onto her knife harder as she tried to get closer to the Librarian. She wanted to distract the ghost, get it angry at her and not attacking the other, but Lil wasn’t sure if she could do so and not get the noise to come back. Shaking she decided to go closer. 

“Regan - the spirit in Regan. I know something awful happened to you, and I’m going to help you,” Lil said calmly, one of her hands behind her back gesturing at the other two to come closer. Hoping that they would know that they might need to pull Regan back into the cabin. “Do you want to move on? You’re making a mound in the woods, why? Are you trying for a proper burial? Did you want a proper right of departure?” Lil was babbling slightly trying more gently to get the ghost to focus on her and away from Leah. It wasn’t the approach she normally took, but maybe it would be worth it. “Is that why you have all of these bones?” 

No matter how many times Leah read about a Banshee scream… no matter how many times she imagined what it might sound like in person, hearing it was 1,000 times worse than she imagined it.  Even with the earplugs she had them all put in as they were walking toward the cabin, it was all encompassing, and despite it lasting for less than a minute, it felt never ending.  She doubled over, her hands clasping at her ears in a desperate yet futile attempt at protection.  Where was Nicole?  Where were the others?  When it was about halfway done, she felt a tell-tale snap in her chest.  She let out an involuntary scream of pain, but it was indistinguishable over Regan.  

She was sure it was going to kill them.  But somehow, there was an end.  At least, she thought it was over.  Her eyes were ringing- an awful, high pitched sound that seemed to rush through her head like a train.  A hand came down to grip her chest, confirming that yes, her rib did crack during the scream.  She groaned, barely hearing herself as her ears tried to come back to Earth.  She could not stand up, at least not swiftly, but she lifted her head to find Regan.  

They locked eyes, and there was a glimpse of her old friend again.  Tears started to fill her eyes, and then Regan nodded.  It was all Leah needed to spring everything into action.  

“She’s ready.  She won’t do it again”, she yelled out. She wasn’t even sure if anyone could hear her. A swarm of relief was swelling in her chest, and she hoped it wasn't misplaced delusion from the broken rib.  “Grab her. We need to start the ritual now.”

Leah warned them. They tried to prepare in case of a scream. But Nicole soon realized there was no preparation effective enough for a banshee’s scream. She had nothing to compare it with. She shrunk, arms going up to cover both ears and head, but it wasn’t only that. The waves vibrated against her clothes, it made her blood pump faster. Glass shattered everywhere. The logs creaked dangerously. Had Regan kept going, she was certain the cabin would’ve buried them all. There was no silence when she finally stopped screaming, only a high pitched ringing and the stupor preventing her from going back into action.

Heart in her throat, she reached for Leah, who took the hit the hardest. It was exactly the type of situation she wanted to stop. Was she hurt? Mission was over if she was. Regan could exorcise herself for all she cared. Leah, being Leah, was already commanding them to do something. But her words didn’t register clearly. It was hard to overcome the ringing in her ears. Or feel like she was back in her body again. With the few words she caught, and the pointed looks, she understood the message. Lil needed them to restrain the woman. Leah thought the woman was ready to be restrained. She glanced at Ari, wondering if she’d join her, before she yanked Regan by the arm, gentleness forgone. She’d throw her over her shoulders if she put any more resistance. Yes, she wasn't easy to handle, but she was easy to overpower. She kicked the first chair she could find to face them, forcing Regan down, and looked back for instructions.

The panic that had begun to rise in her was only exacerbated by the vibrations the scream sent pulsing through her body. Ari was still frozen in place outside the cabin, hands somehow managing to find her ears as glass fell over her like a harsh rain. The knicks in her skin were nothing compared to the ache it sent through her body and the ring in her ears, but even that couldn’t cut through the worry. She should have been paying more attention, her being here wasn’t good for anyone, but it was already too late. 

Do you think I’d let you down?

Maybe not intentionally. 

Words that hadn’t even been technically spoken played in her head over the continued dull ring in her ears. Ari knew she’d fucked this up just as badly as she had with Sammy. She was letting everyone here down. She was letting Kaden down and it made her stomach turn, but heavy feet followed behind Nicole as if on autopilot. Regan made a promise of some sort so it had to be okay now. It had to be. There was no way shit like this could just keep happening. Whatever ritual they were here to perform was happening now and she had to make sure Leah and Lil weren’t hurt. “Right, yeah, ready,” she responded, but her voice remained hollow as she followed behind the others.

Lilian tried to move quickly, knowing that time was probably not on any of their sides, but she still winced as she tried to right herself. She was used to heavy bones, but she wasn’t sure the last time she felt this shaken by something. She felt a little more human and fragile then she really wanted to at the moment. She almost waited to hear the responses from Regan - the spirits in here more accurately, but she wasn’t sure how much she could reason with a ghost anyway. Either they would let her do this, or they would fight. Either way she was going to get them out of Regan. 

So when Nicole grabbed Regan, Lil went in behind the two and almost automatically said to put Regan into a chair before seeing that Nicole did it already , “Thanks - Yeah chair is perfect.” Without hesitation Lil moved to draw a circle around Regan, careful not to step into the circle or put down her knife. She didn’t want to threaten the other, but she didn’t want to have her jump either. So she didn’t point the knife at her, but kept it in her hand nonetheless the tip facing her in her hand. 

“Nicole - you need to move a little ” Lil said softly to the other hoping that she could hear her and wanting her not to get the salt on her. She might have asked Ari to move in, but she hadn’t heard the other in a second and she didn’t want to waste time. 

It happened so quickly – a woman’s arms encircling her and tossing her haphazardly into the chair. She attempted to kick. She attempted to scream. But her motions were futile and her scream amounted to nothing more than a pathetic mewl. Regan felt the hard clunk of the chair, the careless way her wings were bent across its back, and the knowledge that the precious cargo inside of her backpack had nearly been damaged.

It was all unforgivable. But she would not allow herself to feel anything else. 

Regan eyed the knife, then looked at Lil. “Iron? Doesn’t look as sharp as the cold iron daggers I’m used to. Unimpressive.” She gazed past Lil, scanning Leah, Ari, and the Other. “What is this about? Clearly there’s been some mistake. I mean, you think you’re talking to a spirit? Breaking in? Forcing me into a chair? You do not deserve answers. I do.” Regan wasn’t sure what to believe. The word believe was hardly in her vocabulary. But this, whatever it was, was insulting on all levels, and the coyote wanted to tear itself out of its bony confines. It was afraid. More than that, it still sensed something – and it was more than just what was occurring here. There was another threat. Regan adjusted herself on the chair in the small amount of wiggle room she was afforded. Her wings flicked with agitation, and she carefully positioned her backpack so as not to damage what she was meant to protect.

The skull. It was all about the skull, everything was about the skull, she had to protect–

Scream.

Regan’s chest heaved, and she opened her mouth, attempting to summon even a wisp of what she had before, but her lungs were failing her. Sweat dripped from her temples as she choked out nothing but an unbecoming yelp. Scream. Now. “I’m trying,” Regan growled, immediately regretting the display of irritability. The promise would not allow it. But the coyote wasn’t one to give up. Not in its first lifetime, and not in any of the following ones. Certainly not in death. 

The coyotes came, all twelve, and they had never looked so low and so mean. They appeared by the chair, trying to force space between the skull and their assailants. Foamy spittle sprayed across the wooden floor, and stiff hairs bristled along their backs. Regan knew what they probably didn’t: the coyotes would only buy time. They couldn’t kill. She needed to think. And perhaps, even more than her connection to death, that was why the skull had chosen her. She would not fail it.

The pain in Leah’s side would not dull out.  Instead, it sparked with every subtle movement, and flashed with every breath.  The nod was barely a breath of a promise, but it was apparently enough to keep any more screams at bay.  She winced at the sight of Regan being thrown around, cognizant of the vials of tears still tucked safely in her bag should they end up needing them.  “You’re severely underestimating my intelligence- and our friendship, for that matter, if you expect me to believe there’s not a coyote spirit hijacking your own right now”, she groaned out, pushing against her legs to help herself finally stand up fully.  “I will answer any questions you might have when we’re done, but it’s been pretty clear to me that up until now you didn’t want to talk.  Have you changed your mind?  Are you ready to talk, Regan?”

She was about to warn the others to be careful with Regan because of how uncomfortable she looked as they were working to tie her up, but something about how the banshee was moving caught Leah’s eyes.  She wasn’t adjusting herself because she was uncomfortable, she realized.  No, she was adjusting herself because she was trying not to harm whatever was in her bag.  

The only thing that might be important enough was the very skull they were here to destroy.

Leah’s mind was racing, and Regan seemingly responded out loud to someone who wasn’t there.  It was an unneeded confirmation that there was something else going on here.  She didn’t have too much time to think about it though, because she was suddenly thrown back off her feet.  She had never seen anything like the twelve seething wisps of coyotes that filled the room before them, and it filled her with such a wave of dread and incompetence that she wasn’t prepared for. The descriptions from Nicole and Kaden about them had been apt, but it wasn’t comforting in the slightest. This was why she was worried about this ritual and exorcism and ritual.  She had pulled pieces of similar situations when preparing for this ritual.  She had no idea what they were up against, and so she had no idea if  their methods were going to work.  

Lil raised her eyebrow slightly at the comment about the knife still trying to concentrate on preparing for the ritual, and not putting  Nicole near the salt. She wasn’t quite sure what would happen, but she didn’t want her to be hurt. “Not sure what you mean by that, but trust me it’ll do what it needs to do.” After all, she didn’t need it to be sharp. 

Before she could do anything else she saw the ghosts like a howl. Like before, they seemed to be coyotes and at one point Lil thought they were. They weren’t something from beyond trapped here, and there was something like a twinge of sadness to see them. Lil couldn’t tell how they died by looking at them, whoever had killed the Coyote was careful, but the spirits didn’t seem right either with too many of them working together. Cursing under her breath Lil pointed her knife to the ground and got ready to throw some of the salt at the wolves. She could try and banish them, but she wasn’t sure if she’d get up afterwards which would lead to this process to be longer. So she moved between Regan and Nicole to finish the circle scrambling up to get into the circle to replace Nicole and keep Regan in the chair.  “Hey Ari or Leah - come, come help me keep her down. I can’t do the ritual inside here. The ghosts shouldn’t be able to cross. Nicole, if you still got that knife I gave you, now’s a great time to use it.”

The scene around Ari moved in slow motion as she stayed rooted a good distance away. This was the last place she should be and she’d been so absentminded as they made their way there she didn’t realize until it was too late. For a moment, everything sounded muffled though that could have been the effect of the scream. It wasn’t until she heard her name that she made any sort of motion. She shook her head, trying to figure out what was being asked of her. Instinctively, she made a move toward Lil to what was asked. Leah had taken the brunt of the scream and someone needed to help. On the chance that Regan asked something of her, she could fight it, she would accept the consequences. Her own carelessness was what got her here. “Got it,” she said, trying to sound more certain than she actually was. 

Ari approached the chair Regan was seated in from behind and grabbed a hold of the banshee’s shoulders firmly, putting a good deal of her strength into the motion while trying to dodge fluttering wings.  

Lil was scrambling to draw some sort of circle on the cabin floor, and the others seemed to be under the impression that they could hold her down onto the chair. “I owe you nothing,” Regan said, trying to tear away from them, eyes going black as fury filled her. What did they think they were doing? How dare they touch her? How dare they make her coyote feel such terror after lifetimes of suffering? They wouldn’t. They couldn’t. The coyotes would – but something stopped them. Several had bowed down to lunge at the intruders, but it was as if they froze, became objects. A couple of them then pointed their muzzles toward the door, sensing something that Regan couldn’t. What could possibly be more important than this? She asked inwardly, hoping her coyote could supply an answer, and explain that the two of them were not truly threatened.

The only response was a savage growl.

The coyotes vanished in the same manner they had appeared. Seconds. Regan knew she only had seconds to come up with a plan to protect both herself, and the skull, whose judgment seemed to be erring for the first time. And she felt… alone. Why? She had the skull. But it only offered pained howls and furious snarling. No. She was on her own. And because of that, she had even greater responsibility not to fail.

An idea struck her. The invisible strings that Lydia once spoke of – ready to be tugged and plucked when the time came to collect. Regan hissed and squirmed away from Leah’s hands, and looked only at Ariana. Her voice was cold and stony when she spoke, and for a second, right when it hit her ears, she barely recognized it. “It’s time. Stop them by any means necessary.”

When she’d seen the ghost coyotes, her hand itched to reach for the bag of salt she knew was in the pocket of her jacket, but Ari kept her hands firmly on Regan’s shoulder. She refused to look at the banshee or process the shuffled noises around her. Her focus shifted entirely to the feeling of Regan’s shoulder under her hand and how she was cooler than Ari had expected. How each flutter of her wings sent a flap of cold air toward the wolf. It could only do so much though. She felt the sharp iciness of Regan’s eyes on her and she had no choice but to hear the words. Stop them by any means necessary. 

Her heart dropped and everything around her became static. Any means necessary. Ari had to believe Regan didn’t truly know how dangerous an ask that was. “Regan,” she said through a strained voice, “You don’t want to do that. I won’t be able to stop myself from hurting you either.” But her bones ached under her skin, demanding her to move, to do something. She took a few slow steps back to put some distance between herself and the others. A sheen of sweat was already coating her skin as she fought what the promise demanded of her. 

Rooted in place, Ari heaved in short breaths that burned. It felt like her body was moving forward without her, ripping her apart in the process. She had to fight it, she couldn’t let the strings of the promise pull her. She wouldn’t hurt anyone here, she couldn’t, but there was only so long she could suppress the side of her that was more wolf-like. Ari knew she didn’t want to hurt them, the wolf only knew it was in pain and needed to bite back. The claws came out first, against her will and she still resisted. The searing pain in her now more paw like hands only grew the longer she tried to keep herself in control of her own form, but it was a wasted effort. 

Fur sprouted along her body as her body contorted and shifted into its lupine shape. Ari could hear the cracking of bones and tearing of clothes before the room no longer became full of her friends, but her next meal. Yellow eyes scanned the room, picking their prey. Drool hung off large jowls as the wolf let out a low growl as it began circling the women in the room, ready to pounce at whoever moved next.

Leah wanted to bark out that the skull must have been her bag.  That Regan was adjusting over it and trying to protect it and its very proximity might have been the thing that was corrupting her mind.  But Regan would have heard, and they needed to be 3 steps ahead of her if they wanted this to work.  Without some sort of mind communication, that meant Leah would have to get the skull from behind Regan herself.  She was glad that Ari elected to go stand by Regan, because any movements at all, sudden or not, shot sharp pains through her chest.   It was enough, anyway, that they had to deal with the coyote ghosts-  Or at least it would have been, if they didn’t seem to get distracted by something and scurry off.

It had to have been the other group that drew their attention, but to Leah, that wasn’t good news.  To save Regan, they needed the other group just as distraction free as they needed themselves.  She didn’t have too much time to dwell on the thought, though, because what was going on in front of her was much more terrifying.

She had not registered that Regan had spoken directly to Ari.  She had barely even registered the cold, calculated voice that came out of her friend.  Instead, all she could focus on was the seething, searing transformation in front of her.  Her breath hitched, and for the first time in the last few minutes, it was not due to the pain in her ribs.  Her mind flashed back to the Alcher wolf, to the two of them tumbling down her stairs as each of them tried to fight for the upper hand.  To lying, broken and bruised at the bottom, sure she was going to die.  She couldn’t breath or think.  Her eyes searched desperately around the room, trying to find an out or a solution or anything that might prove that this could still be a success instead of a jumble of obstacles that were impossible to overcome.

And then her eyes landed on Nicole’s.

Ariana transformed into a monstrous beast, coerced by some sort of banshee power. It was no longer their friend, but a ferocious creature ready to rip them to shreds with no remorse. And Nicole wanted to focus on what a horrendous oversight was to bring the girl along with them, but Leah’s gaze found hers across the room.

Leah was looking at her. The woman who always had one last trick up her sleeve was seeking her help. Which only meant they were truly, undeniably fucking screwed. Her limbs trembled as she held one hand up, but the emotionless tone she used masked her fear perfectly. “Regan” she looked between Lil and Leah. “Focus on her. Do it, quick. Finish the exorcism” she commanded, taking a step forward. “I’ll— I’ll… I—” She’ll what? Nicole felt none of the bold determination the situation required, only the sheer panic wrapping around her ribcage. This was it. How they all died. Her airway constricted as she bore into savage yellow eyes.

There won’t be a second time. A promise Nicole slurred every night for a year as she lay on unfamiliar curbsides, more alcohol than blood in her veins. More animal than human back then. Guilt ridden and angry with herself. A promise often followed by a plea: For fate to take her too, and the universe to show her mercy. Never again she’d turn into the beast that took everything from her. It was her mantra, repeated through clenched teeth and salty tears until it became her essence. What helped her out the quicksands of grief. The spirit had coiled within her plenty of times after that, threatened to take over, but each time she prevailed. Control like a chokehold. Never once let the jaguar win.  

There wouldn’t be a second time, but Lil didn’t deserve this after selflessly offering her help time and time again. No second time, but Ari shouldn’t have to carry the burden of ending three lives. Leah shouldn’t have to be traumatized again by a beast. There wasn't supposed to be a second time except, brown eyes met feral yellow, and the spirit clawed desperate against her ribs, ready to be freed at last.

Nicole thought of her father, of his actions as he faced his reckoning. Giving her the best shot at survival. She stood there, proof of his sacrifice. She had to give them the same chance, whether it took a year, or five or a decade of her life. Her gaze sought Leah, wondering if she'd ever see her again. But if it was the last time she saw her then— fuck, she wanted her image burned into her mind. In the end, all she wanted was to stop being torn apart every time she found something worth living for. She thought she’d be beat down already, numb. Yet the unfairness of life filled her lungs with rage. Her muscles burned. This time, she let it happen. Something bigger was required. Something fiercer. She was something. It was something. She said she'd get them an exit plan. 

There was no exit, but she was the plan.

Flesh tore and bones shifted, but the jaguar ripped through her so fast and so fierce that she barely suffered. It came out bigger, angrier, more threatening than it had at seventeen. No intent on running this time, but set to kill instead. The thundering roar vibrated against the floor, and it was the only warning before the jaguar lunged towards the wolf. Two forces of nature clashed, teeth and claws out to destroy. Humans forgotten as they battled for dominance. The wolf struck first, but the jaguar recovered quickly, claws slicing its upper body. The wood buckled and cracked beneath them, their beastly bodies thrashing about with furious strength, too big to fit through the door frame without damaging it. As a result, it was torn out as the beasts freed themselves from the cabin’s containment. Out in the open, their fight turned into a thrilling chase.

Lil’s jaw stealed as she heard words around her she didn’t quite understand. She was used to being a human in a room full of supernaturals, but sometimes there was a bit of her that  remembered all too well she was a human. One swipe and her life was over in this room, and part of her recognized that she should be scared of that. After all, she was usually calculated with situations she couldn’t handle. She bowed to a demon for Christ's sake knowing that she couldn’t do anything dead. 

Still she promised. Lil promised to get Regan out of this, and she’d already resolved herself to this fate. She hadn’t done so to any one person nor was it a binding promise , but when she said she could do this she meant it. She would do it.  Maybe the noises in the background of people fighting turning more into supernatural creatures might disturb her. Maybe she wanted to go help them and not be stuck in a ritual she couldn’t be taken out of until it was done, but she wouldn’t be a help either. She had to trust that she wasn’t about to get attacked. She had to hope whatever was happening to Ari would dissipate if she did this. She had to trust that Nicole was handling this as she told them to focus on the ritual. 

So with a grip on her knife Lil kneeled down and struck the outside of the circle and said softly to Leah, “I’m probably going to pass out after this. You’re going to want to break the skull when I’m done.” 

With that Lil looked at Regan for a moment resigning herself to a ritual that wasn’t going to be pleasant. Still she said softly with a hint of pity she normally didn’t have for ghosts, to the ghost she was fairly sure was still in Regan, “I am going to give you as proper of a funerary rite as I can. I will try to make sure your bones are buried.” Maybe it was a sympathy that the coyote didn’t deserve after the havoc, but with the bits Lil could put together there was something tragic with the ghost she couldn’t help but want to put to rest. Even if her ears were still ringing, and her bones vibrating, she could at least try to do the right thing. 

With that Lil started the ritual, her voice ringing out clear as she started speaking in Latin, her knife turning hot quickly. 

Regan expected Ariana to simply throw herself in front of her. The presence of a child there would have stopped the others in their tracks. Or perhaps she would leap onto them, limbs flailing like a wild animal as they refused to kick her off, not wanting to risk hurting her. No. That was not what happened. Ariana was shaky when she looked at Regan, her eyes pleading with her to take it back. Moments later, Regan understood why. Where Ariana once stood, then bowed, then writhed, there was a snarling beast. Regan’s mouth dropped open. How– no. That wasn’t – but the skull pushed all thoughts of the impossible away. It doesn’t matter. It managed to snarl as much, even in its nearly blind rage. She knew it was right. The beast was less handsome than her own favorite predatory mammal, but more useful at the moment. It scanned the room as if on a hunt, and Regan got to work trying to wiggle out of the chair, singularly focused and trying to block out the wolf-thing in the room. It didn’t want her right now. But the Other was up to something. The way Leah looked at her. The demands she gave. Regan grit her teeth, trying with renewed effort to get away. The scream she coughed up withered and died before it left her mouth. 

And then there was a second beast, this one a jaguar, and it lunged at the first beast, cartwheeling and clawing toward the front of the cabin. Regan’s stomach hardened like a rock. This was bad. Beyond possible, and incredibly bad. She was failing the skull. She said she would never do that.

That was – Regan couldn’t think of anything else. What else did she have? There were the daggers. So many of them in here, but none within reach. She strained, especially as Lil spoke of the skull. They knew. Leah. Of course. She still couldn’t make sense of what this whole thing was, though. The circles, the Latin, the bags of miscellania brought in. Regan craned her neck at Lil, eyes narrowed. And what Lil said made her run cold. “You’re going to give me what?” She spat, lips bared back. “Funerary rites? Bury my bones? What does that– you’re going to kill me? Is that it? You think you can kill me?” The coyote was still pulled elsewhere. She didn’t understand it. But when she needed its support now, it was nowhere to be found. “It’s not– whatever you think you’re doing, whatever homeopathic nonsense this– Leah thought there was a spirit in me, whatever that means. You have it wrong.” Her bag grazed against the back of the chair, and her heart skipped a beat. The coyote still seemed distracted, in another place. Part of her yearned to mention the skull, that it was the skull, they wanted the skull, she wasn’t goddamn possessed, but then she felt the waves of death coming off of it, and all was forgiven. Lil was already chanting, so Regan tried to catch Leah’s eyes. Something. Maybe she could manage something. It was the pained way Leah held herself, and the sharp breathing that sank in. She had done that. “Leah,” Regan started, an apology on her tongue. But the skull had many times insisted apologies were not given to those who were inferior to you. She swallowed it back. And the coyote, even in its relative absence, had the final say. “You still don’t know anything.”

When Leah had looked to Nicole, she didn’t know what kind of help she expected.  Perhaps a calming gaze or some reassuring words, or even a quick way to solve the new Ariana wolf debacle.  But what came of her pleading was so unexpected that Leah almost couldn’t catch her breath at the sight of it.  Nicole was being ripped apart by the Jaguar inside, and Leah couldn’t take her eyes off the sight as she watched it take over.

They hadn’t had a chance to practice.  They should have taken the time to practice having Nicole try to change in a situation that wasn’t stress induced.  Because that had to be why she changed for so long the first time, right?  Five years gone… and then another several being lost trying to find her way back to who she was.  Leah couldn’t bear five years.  Not when they had only just begun.  But then, this was different from the first time, it had to be.  All those years ago, Nicole was basically still a child.  She hadn’t expected to turn, she hadn’t even tried to.  But Nicole’s eyes had locked on hers before she changed, deliberately and with finality.  She knew what she was doing.  She wanted this, and maybe it was the smartest way to save them.  Leah couldn’t even gather how she felt about Nicole and Ari tumbling out of the cabin, because they had to continue helping Regan.  Because if the exorcism didn’t work, all of this carnage would be for nothing.  It had to work.

It had to work.

She nodded at Lil’s request, eyeing Regan sitting in the chair.  It wouldn’t be easy to get the bag from her, not when she was practically sitting on it.  “Not your bones”, she told Regan, getting closer.  Her steps were slow and cautious, and her hand held her side the entire time she inched forward.  “She’s speaking with the coyote.”  Lil was deep into her ritual now, so it  was practically just her and Regan in the room.  Well, her and Regan and whatever was corrupting Regan’s mind.  Was it dormant?  Did it leave with the ghost coyotes a few moments ago?  Regan was still riddled with anger and confusion, but there was a mere moment where their eyes caught when Leah knew it was the real Regan again.  Her friend’s expression pleaded with her; though whether the pleading was apologetic or desperation for help she couldn’t tell.  But regardless, Leah gave her a shaky nod.  “I do know”, she whispered, her voice barely heard under Lil’s chanting.  She was still inching closer, her eyes traveling between Regan’s and the bag behind her.  “I know this is scary and confusing.  I know none of this seems like it can be possible.”  She hoped to fate that the rope holding her in place was strong enough. Tentatively, she reached out, putting her hand on Regan’s. Regan’s skin was a stark, cold contrast to her own, something she always wondered if Regan ever realized.  Or, was it like so many other things with Regan, that she found it easier to explain the strange away than face it head on.  

Leah assumed Lil was nearing the end of the ritual, because her chants were getting louder and more demanding.  She had to do this now, if ever. “I may not know everything, Regan.  But there’s a hell of a lot I do know.  And I know that skull has to be the cause of all this.” 

By the time she finished speaking, her free hand was already on the bag behind Regan, and she took the opportunity of distraction to yank it out from behind her.  The skull clattered inside the bag, and just as Lil finished her chant, Leah pulled it out and slammed it onto the ground.  For a moment, she stared at it, trying to understand how so much power and corruption can lie dormant in such a small vessel.  They needed to destroy it for good, so that even after Lil’s exorcism, no harm could come from it again.  

So she stared at it, finally letting all the seething anger she held for it over the last few months release.  Her anger for lost friends, for people too blind to see the beauty of what they truly were, and even for all those months Regan lost being a muse to something none of them quite understood.  Just like when she destroyed the tree, she was struck with how a town full of such beauty and wonder could also hold such a dark, sinister underbelly.  It wasn’t going to work.  Her fire hadn’t behaved properly in months.  But somehow, miraculously, she watched in front of her as anger turned to flame, and the skull was finally set ablaze.  

The skull, the skull, the skull. Regan thrashed back, trying to twist away from Leah enough that she couldn’t find purchase on the bag. But she was stuck, and the coyote had abandoned her, and Lil’s chants rose far above the scuffling chair and her failed screams of desperation. All that came was more hacking, and for a moment, it struck Regan how much she had been relying on the scream and the coyote – two things that should have felt utterly alien to her. To anyone. What happened? But Leah’s hands found the bag, and her thoughts were dashed, refocused on the tender bones cocooned in there. “Do not touch it,” Regan growled, twisting more. She couldn’t reach them. Couldn’t reach Leah. Leah’s eyes seemed to say that she couldn’t reach her, either. “You don’t deserve to–” Regan hollered, but it was too late.

The sound of the skull shattering into the floor of her cabin sent tears to her eyes. While it remained mostly intact, parts of the parietals fragmented and flew off. The already-fragile maxillae were ground to mere dust. “Stop!” Regan screeched, but it wasn’t the kind of screech she needed, and Leah’s shoe was firm against the frontal bone and– “Stop! Don’t hurt it! It didn’t do anything wrong, it just–” Leah’s eyes were glued to the skull, her skull, and Regan knew she didn’t have long to plead. “The coyote doesn’t deserve this. It didn’t deserve any of what happened. Please don’t hurt it. It–” But Leah almost seemed to be elsewhere. Regan didn’t understand what was on her face. 

Until she did. The anger was unmistakable. The kind of anger she sometimes wished she could still feel, but it had to be the first to go, the first to sacrifice for her control. Leah’s burned red and hot. It almost smelled like smoke. And then the first of maybe-actual-smoke wafted upward, a gray hair becoming a curling, sizzling tendril, and it smoldered against her nostrils, and the panic inside her screamed where she couldn’t. It was a lifetime ago – the morgue going up in flames, the smell of burning skin and hair, the cough she had for weeks after they yanked her out. And powerless, all she could do was watch the fire engulf what she loved once again, as the chanting rose in a sinister arc and the smoke burned her watery eyes.

Lil didn’t like the commotion around her when she did a ritual, but to be fair it wasn’t as if it was ever a silent endeavor. Usually though, it wasn’t this chaotic. Ghosts rarely wanted to exit a host, especially ones that wanted to finish what they were doing. She wanted to say that she was doing the right thing, that the spirit was distorted, that it needed to move beyond. She wasn’t hurting it - she’d never cause pain to a ghost despite not particularly liking them. Hell, she was pretty sure the person was the one that ended up feeling the pain of the exorcism, not the ghost.  She wanted to say a lot to calm down the two in front of her, but the ritual didn’t allow for deviation. 

Her words rose higher, Lil’s hands gripping the knife as it became warmer and warmer the feeling of temporary power making her bones feel more steady. She tried not to think of the fact it was going to hurt worse when it was done.  Her eyes closed, trying to block out the pleading and the want to assure Regan she wasn’t trying to hurt her. She was trying to tell the Coyote that it was okay. Instead she finally opened her eyes looking at Regan - or past her really for a moment as the words came to an end, “ -Coyote spiritus, tempus est ire. Relinque! Anima tua in pace requiescat. Relinquere Regan et requiescere.”  

For a moment the dagger felt like a warm fire instead of unbearably hot, Lil thinking that if she could see her final words that they would be golden. It was different than normal, and if she could think about it for a moment Lil might have wondered if her will had gotten stronger. She doubted that though. 

She couldn’t see the ghosts, not sure if they were still here but knowing that the rope was snapped between the spirit and Regan.  For a moment it felt still for Lil, even if she could see Regan turning and pleading. Her body felt weightless and strong, like she wasn’t quite here and instead on a different plane. It should have scared her but it felt peaceful for a moment  - until it slammed back into her. Her dagger turned ice cold as she struggled to keep a hold of it. Whatever adrenaline she had left her body as she suddenly felt the scream rattling in her bones again. Folding over for a moment she could smell smoke - and what she could imagine was ash. 

Lil tried to speak, but what came out was more of a rough whisper than anything the shout taking out the bits of her normal voice. “ The - Spirit is at rest. The coyote - I don’t think he’s in pain anymore. - Uh, I don't think I can get up.” She hoped whatever had caused Ari and Nicole to start fighting might ease up now, so one of them would get her back to her car at least. 

The Latin, the smoke stuck inside her nostrils, the sensation that something dear to her was slowly peeling its presence out of the room, out of this world. Regan hadn’t felt so overwhelmed in her confusion since the day her dad died and everything changed. The rope dug into her and she could feel contusions forming from her thrashing against the chair, but what else could she do? The skull was destroyed. Dust. The coyote – she could barely feel it, even its rage. It was a howl turned hiss turned whimper, and it reminded Regan of its past deaths, the desperate animal noises of so many deaths it didn’t deserve. And now it would have another, also underserved, all because she had failed.

Regan tried to scream, her voice rising into a screech as the coyote’s very existence receded to nothing. The room, her head, her duty – it was all so empty. She wasn’t sure at which point she was able to scream again, but it meant this was over, didn’t it? That thought gave her no pleasure, and only fostered more bitterness toward the people who were responsible. The scream changed once again into a sob. One, then another. And the rope was cut, and concern filled the eyes of the traitor. Regan glanced toward the floor at the other one. She didn’t understand what just happened, but it had sapped most of Lil’s energy, clearly. Regan didn’t care. She didn’t. Traitors. 

“Leave.” Regan commanded, not able to wrench her eyes away from the pile of bone ash on the floor. She was sure Leah was hurt. Lil was exhausted. The traitors who couldn’t understand the coyote wasn’t an enemy. She had people to make amends with – Kaden, Emilio, Metzli, Ariana – so many. But right now, all she could think about was the ash, and the silence in her skull. The coyote was gone, somehow vanquished. Another death it did nothing to deserve. And where did this leave her? 

Regan barely noticed as Leah and Lil limped out together. She was no more alone.

[chasseurdeloup-retired]

A Kind of Revenge || Nicole, Virgil, and Kaden

TIMING: A few days after Everyone Needs Kindness LOCATION: The woods PARTIES: @nicsalazar, @virgil-achyls, and @chasseurdeloup SUMMARY: Nicole asks Kaden for help in the woods. Little does he know that Virgil is waiting for him in the shadows. CONTENT WARNINGS: torture, domestic abuse (mentions)

“He’ll be here soon”.

Nicole’s stomach twisted as she uttered those words. And though she did not appreciate how tense she sounded, it was impossible for her to remain calm knowing what they were planning on doing.

Nicole knew the woods. That’s what she could offer. She knew the spots where no one would disturb them. Knew the places no one would dare to look, if for any reason they needed to dispose of any– No. That wasn’t what they were going to do, was it? They were just going to show Kaden's actions had consequences. Consequences that in this case might be gruesome but, she wasn’t about to feel bad for him. It was his fault for hurting a leshy who was friends with a shadow fae. Just– it was the situation. An incredibly fucked up one. She never expected to be the one facilitate any kind of torture. 

She pocketed her phone after sending Kaden the final instructions so he could find her. Supposedly, to deal with a particularly stubborn plague of squirrels disturbing hikers in one of Park’s trails. There was no trail, of course. Nor squirrels. But it was the simplest of lies to lure him where they needed him. Where Virgil needed him.

Nicole had deluded herself into believing the only reason she was tagging along was because that way, she’d be there to stop Virgil if things got out of control. Yeah. It was worth reminding herself of exactly that as she turned towards Virgil, her stomach in a knot. He was partly hidden, and on any other occasion, she might have stopped and admired what he was. Not now though, when she couldn’t stop grinding her teeth. “Couple minutes, at most” she clarified, senses attuned to any disturbance in their surroundings.

In the past, a message like Nicole’s would have sent him running, ready to solve the problem, rid the world of monsters, be the hero or some shit like that. Whatever it was he had let himself believe for years. But now? Kaden had been reluctant to agree to help with what sounded suspiciously like a bunch of agropelters. He wanted to tell her that he couldn’t. Only trying to explain why sounded worse than trying to drag himself out to the middle of the woods. Not to mention who was asking for his help. He didn’t think for a second he would be Nicole’s first choice to call in for help, not after how he’d handled things the last time they met up. If she was asking him, it had to be because she needed him. Kaden wasn’t particularly up to recommending any other hunter to go get the job done, either. So here he was, marching through the White Crest National Park on his way to play ranger. Fantastic.

Kaden had decided not to bring a whole lot with him. It was odd, he felt like he forgot to get dressed all the way. The only weapons he had taken with him on the way out were two knives. It didn’t feel like enough. At the same time, it felt like two more weapons than he wanted to be carrying right now. He told himself that it was only going to be used on beasts, uncomplicated monsters. Monsters that were hurting people. 

“Hey,” he called out when he saw the park ranger. A small chill went down his spine as he approached her, and he grimaced. This. This was why he wanted to avoid the woods. He was doomed to feel his hunter senses, to be reminded of what he was. And of what he’d done. He inhaled deep and sung the net and snares he’d carried with him off his back. “Which way to the agro– uh, squirrels you were talking about?” His brow furrowed when he realized just how quiet it was in the area. Unusually quiet. Especially if there was a flock of agropelters nearby. Something felt wrong. Then again, this was White Crest; when didn’t everything feel a little wrong? Surely it was fine. 

Vigil kept the darkness thick around the two of them, obscuring them from sight. He didn’t bother putting a glamour on, but he was wearing his usual red glasses to keep things controlled. He didn’t want to hit Nicole, nor did he want to hit the god killer before it confessed to its crimes. 

At Nicole’s murmured warning, he shut his eyes to stem the bright beam, retreating further into the shadows, taking on the natural hunting stillness of a cat. A moment later, he caught the sound of footsteps amid the din of the forest as Kaden approached. The sound of its voice sent a wave of loathing through him. 

When it was near, Virgil’s eyes snapped open. Crimson light flooded the clearing, the resulting shadows cast by the trees tilted towards him, wavering gently as if caught by the gravity of some distant planet. His form was obscured by a heavy curtain of smoky tendrils. Unless the human had very good vision, he was just a pair of glowing red eyes amidst the crawling night.

His gaze bore into the face of Kaden, and its features were bathed in crimson light. It looked unremarkable, if a bit big for a human. In any other situation, Virgil would’ve proceeded with caution, but he wasn’t here tonight to be cautious. He wasn’t going to harm it physically. It was easy not to when your eyes caused madness to any who looked upon them. 

Nicole had mentioned wanting revenge too, and Virgil was eager to see what it’d do to the god killer. He was glad that Nicole was here; it’d helped immensely by luring Kaden into the woods, and it was good to have someone around to hold Kaden down when Virgil was done. There was also solidarity between them. Virgil didn’t feel good about coming here to take revenge, but it had to be done. Nicole and him both needed it. There was no going back now. “Is this Kaden?” He asked Nicole, disgust clear in his voice. 

The human looked miserable. There was something in its eyes that spoke of defeat even before it even knew what was happening. What caused it was beyond Virgil’s understanding (he doubted that it was guilt over killing Solomon), but it’d make things less messy. He was almost glad to see it. 

Virgil slid out of the shadows, footfalls nearly silent, only slightly unsteady as he approached the human. Shadows followed at his feet. Only when he was within arm’s reach of the human did he halt.  

“Human, listen to me. I am going to ask you a question, and you’re going to tell me the truth.” Virgil spoke clearly, gentle and low despite the promise of what must be done to the human. “Did you kill Solomon the Leshy?” 

His voice wavered just slightly as he asked the question. There was no reason for him to feel upset when Solomon wasn’t dead anymore. But he did. This human was responsible for his being separated from his Leshy for months, his inability to leave the garden, enduring migraines and burns from the sun, not knowing if he’d make it through the day and not caring much either way. Perhaps he was doing this for himself as well as Solomon. 

“There must be consequences for what you did. Killing the guardian of the forest is not something you can just get away with doing.” 

“Langley,” Nicole’s heartbeat sped up at the sight of their target. Whatever apprehension she held before seemingly dissipated as the man approached. She remembered Solomon’s charred remains by the tree. His blackened heart. Kaden deserved the same kind of agony. She huffed, trying to keep the rage at bay. The kind of rage that was often swift to wrap around her ribcage, burning so fiercely in her chest that she was left breathless. Easy. She hadn’t spoken to the spirit since that night with the exorcist, but she felt it twisting within her. Slithering around her ribs, curious as to what was causing her ire. Wondering how it could it help soothe it. No physical harm, she reminded herself. Kaden was going to suffer much worse than that. The beast wasn’t needed.

“Yeah, uh—” She stepped forward to meet him, ignoring her conscience nagging her to apologize, or warn him about what he was walking into. She didn’t want to feel sorry for him. She didn’t. She–  But before explanations could be shared, the forest glowed red, smoke expanding everywhere around them. Nicole knew what that meant, she didn’t need or want to look back. She wasn’t gonna risk it. She merely nodded, confirming Kaden’s identity to Virgil. Chills ran all over her body as the fae marched, bringing the shadows along with him. Chills that didn’t stop when she heard his gentle tone demand answers. Fuck. She was lucky to have Virgil as an ally and not an enemy, Nicole realized then.

The darkness swirled around the forest before Kaden had a chance to take one glance around the clearing. The shadows seeped in and the forest began to glow red and all he could think was clearly this wasn’t fucking agropelters. His eyes darted to the source of the strangeness. A figure of shadows and glowing eyes was all he could see. His senses had dulled in the sadness, but his instinct still leapt to his duty after all this time and he took a step towards Nicole, ready to protect her from whatever the fuck was going on here. 

And then the creature addressed her and knew his name. 

Kaden stopped midway on his path to place himself between Nicole and the shadows. Lines deepened in his forehead as he glanced from the shadow, to her, and then back again. “What the hell is going on here?” He looked back to Nicole, hoping for an answer, still wanting to tell her to run. Something in the look on her face told him that she wasn’t going to. Nor did she need to. 

The ranger took a half step back, leaning away as the shadow enclosed the space between them. He tried to get a better look at what sort of creature this was. He had a few thoughts running through his mind. Seemed a little verbose for a bauk or an envy. A prickling sensation traveled down his spine, indicating there was some sort of beast nearby, alerting his hunter’s senses. Only if he had to guess, the creature looming over him was no beast. 

As it asked about the leshy, it clicked into place. Fae. This was a fae. Of course it was a fucking fae kicking him while he was down. What was new, there? Still, the question hit him like a ton of bricks. Did he kill Solomon? “I– I helped, yes,” he said once he found his answer. He’d tossed the lighter, sure, but he wasn’t the one that turned the leshy into kindling first. Not that it absolved him. The guilt sinking deep into his pores was proof enough.

Consequences. So that’s what this was about. Fuck. He had spent this whole time wishing for those, even walking into them and trying to find some repercussions for his actions. Now that he was standing in front of it, he wasn’t sure that he wanted it. Then again, it was what he deserved. “Right,” he said, trying to steel himself, “what’d you have in mind, then?”

“He’ll be here soon”.

Nicole’s stomach twisted as she uttered those words. And though she did not appreciate how tense she sounded, it was impossible for her to remain calm knowing what they were planning on doing.

Nicole knew the woods. That’s what she could offer. She knew the spots where no one would disturb them. Knew the places no one would dare to look, if for any reason they needed to dispose of any– No. That wasn’t what they were going to do, was it? They were just going to show Kaden's actions had consequences. Consequences that in this case might be gruesome but, she wasn’t about to feel bad for him. It was his fault for hurting a leshy who was friends with a shadow fae. Just– it was the situation. An incredibly fucked up one. She never expected to be the one facilitate any kind of torture. 

She pocketed her phone after sending Kaden the final instructions so he could find her. Supposedly, to deal with a particularly stubborn plague of squirrels disturbing hikers in one of Park’s trails. There was no trail, of course. Nor squirrels. But it was the simplest of lies to lure him where they needed him. Where Virgil needed him.

Nicole had deluded herself into believing the only reason she was tagging along was because that way, she’d be there to stop Virgil if things got out of control. Yeah. It was worth reminding herself of exactly that as she turned towards Virgil, her stomach in a knot. He was partly hidden, and on any other occasion, she might have stopped and admired what he was. Not now though, when she couldn’t stop grinding her teeth. “Couple minutes, at most” she clarified, senses attuned to any disturbance in their surroundings.

In the past, a message like Nicole’s would have sent him running, ready to solve the problem, rid the world of monsters, be the hero or some shit like that. Whatever it was he had let himself believe for years. But now? Kaden had been reluctant to agree to help with what sounded suspiciously like a bunch of agropelters. He wanted to tell her that he couldn’t. Only trying to explain why sounded worse than trying to drag himself out to the middle of the woods. Not to mention who was asking for his help. He didn’t think for a second he would be Nicole’s first choice to call in for help, not after how he’d handled things the last time they met up. If she was asking him, it had to be because she needed him. Kaden wasn’t particularly up to recommending any other hunter to go get the job done, either. So here he was, marching through the White Crest National Park on his way to play ranger. Fantastic.

Kaden had decided not to bring a whole lot with him. It was odd, he felt like he forgot to get dressed all the way. The only weapons he had taken with him on the way out were two knives. It didn’t feel like enough. At the same time, it felt like two more weapons than he wanted to be carrying right now. He told himself that it was only going to be used on beasts, uncomplicated monsters. Monsters that were hurting people. 

“Hey,” he called out when he saw the park ranger. A small chill went down his spine as he approached her, and he grimaced. This. This was why he wanted to avoid the woods. He was doomed to feel his hunter senses, to be reminded of what he was. And of what he’d done. He inhaled deep and sung the net and snares he’d carried with him off his back. “Which way to the agro– uh, squirrels you were talking about?” His brow furrowed when he realized just how quiet it was in the area. Unusually quiet. Especially if there was a flock of agropelters nearby. Something felt wrong. Then again, this was White Crest; when didn’t everything feel a little wrong? Surely it was fine. 

Vigil kept the darkness thick around the two of them, obscuring them from sight. He didn’t bother putting a glamour on, but he was wearing his usual red glasses to keep things controlled. He didn’t want to hit Nicole, nor did he want to hit the god killer before it confessed to its crimes. 

At Nicole’s murmured warning, he shut his eyes to stem the bright beam, retreating further into the shadows, taking on the natural hunting stillness of a cat. A moment later, he caught the sound of footsteps amid the din of the forest as Kaden approached. The sound of its voice sent a wave of loathing through him. 

When it was near, Virgil’s eyes snapped open. Crimson light flooded the clearing, the resulting shadows cast by the trees tilted towards him, wavering gently as if caught by the gravity of some distant planet. His form was obscured by a heavy curtain of smoky tendrils. Unless the human had very good vision, he was just a pair of glowing red eyes amidst the crawling night.

His gaze bore into the face of Kaden, and its features were bathed in crimson light. It looked unremarkable, if a bit big for a human. In any other situation, Virgil would’ve proceeded with caution, but he wasn’t here tonight to be cautious. He wasn’t going to harm it physically. It was easy not to when your eyes caused madness to any who looked upon them. 

Nicole had mentioned wanting revenge too, and Virgil was eager to see what it’d do to the god killer. He was glad that Nicole was here; it’d helped immensely by luring Kaden into the woods, and it was good to have someone around to hold Kaden down when Virgil was done. There was also solidarity between them. Virgil didn’t feel good about coming here to take revenge, but it had to be done. Nicole and him both needed it. There was no going back now. “Is this Kaden?” He asked Nicole, disgust clear in his voice. 

The human looked miserable. There was something in its eyes that spoke of defeat even before it even knew what was happening. What caused it was beyond Virgil’s understanding (he doubted that it was guilt over killing Solomon), but it’d make things less messy. He was almost glad to see it. 

Virgil slid out of the shadows, footfalls nearly silent, only slightly unsteady as he approached the human. Shadows followed at his feet. Only when he was within arm’s reach of the human did he halt.  

“Human, listen to me. I am going to ask you a question, and you’re going to tell me the truth.” Virgil spoke clearly, gentle and low despite the promise of what must be done. “Did you kill Solomon the Leshy?” 

His voice wavered just slightly as he asked the question. There was no reason for him to feel upset when Solomon wasn’t dead anymore. But he did. This human was responsible for his being separated from his Leshy for months, his inability to leave the garden, enduring migraines and burns from the sun, not knowing if he’d make it through the day and not caring much either way. Perhaps he was doing this for himself as well as Solomon. 

“There must be consequences for what you did. Killing the guardian of the forest is not something you can just get away with doing.” 

“Langley,” Nicole’s heartbeat sped up at the sight of their target. Whatever apprehension she held before seemingly dissipated as the man approached. She remembered Solomon’s charred remains by the tree. His blackened heart. Kaden deserved the same kind of agony. She huffed, trying to keep the rage at bay. The kind of rage that was often swift to wrap around her ribcage, burning so fiercely in her chest that she was left breathless. Easy. She hadn’t spoken to the spirit since that night with the exorcist, but she felt it twisting within her. Slithering around her ribs, curious as to what was causing her ire. Wondering how it could it help soothe it. No physical harm, she reminded herself. Kaden was going to suffer much worse than that. The beast wasn’t needed.

“Yeah, uh—” She stepped forward to meet him, ignoring her conscience nagging her to apologize, or warn him about what he was walking into. She didn’t want to feel sorry for him. She didn’t. She–  But before explanations could be shared, the forest glowed red, smoke expanding everywhere around them. Nicole knew what that meant, she didn’t need or want to look back. She wasn’t going to risk it. She merely nodded, confirming Kaden’s identity to Virgil. Chills ran all over her body as the fae marched, bringing the shadows along with him. Chills that didn’t stop when she heard his gentle tone demand answers. Fuck. She was lucky to have Virgil as an ally and not an enemy, Nicole realized then.

The darkness swirled around the forest before Kaden had a chance to take one glance around the clearing. The shadows seeped in and the forest began to glow red and all he could think was clearly this wasn’t fucking agropelters. His eyes darted to the source of the strangeness. A figure of shadows and glowing eyes was all he could see. His senses had dulled in the sadness, but his instinct still leapt to his duty after all this time and he took a step towards Nicole, ready to protect her from whatever the fuck was going on here. 

And then the creature addressed her and knew his name. 

Kaden stopped midway on his path to place himself between Nicole and the shadows. Lines deepened in his forehead as he glanced from the shadow, to her, and then back again. “What the hell is going on here?” He looked back to Nicole, hoping for an answer, still wanting to tell her to run. Something in the look on her face told him that she wasn’t going to. Nor did she need to. 

The ranger took a half step back, leaning away as the shadow enclosed the space between them. He tried to get a better look at what sort of creature this was. He had a few thoughts running through his mind. Seemed a little verbose for a bauk or an envy. A prickling sensation traveled down his spine, indicating there was some sort of beast nearby, alerting his hunter’s senses. Only if he had to guess, the creature looming over him was no beast. 

As it asked about the leshy, it clicked into place. Fae. This was a fae. Of course it was a fucking fae kicking him while he was down. What was new, there? Still, the question hit him like a ton of bricks. Did he kill Solomon? “I– I helped, yes,” he said once he found his answer. He’d tossed the lighter, sure, but he wasn’t the one that turned the leshy into kindling first. Not that it absolved him. The guilt sinking deep into his pores was proof enough.

Consequences. So that’s what this was about. Fuck. He had spent this whole time wishing for those, even walking into them and trying to find some repercussions for his actions. Now that he was standing in front of it, he wasn’t sure that he wanted it. Then again, it was what he deserved. “Right,” he said, trying to steel himself, “what’d you have in mind, then?”

Virgil had to admit that some part of him was glad that the human confessed. He was eager to move on, not wishing to linger in this place any longer than he had to. But the bigger part was just exhausted.

He stared at Kaden, and saw the face of every human he’d ever cared for in his life. All of them had started to look the same after a while. The same dead eyes. The same pleas which Virgil could only pretend he didn’t hear. This Kaden could’ve been one of his. But it also could’ve been the one who snapped and burned down his home and his brother. He knew logically that Kaden was behind his friend’s death. Yet, he couldn’t quite connect the months of nightmares, the black pit of dread that he’d fallen into, certain that one day he’d just lose his form and his voice and become a ghost himself. That was not something that just went away even after Solomon’s return. 

I am not my mother. Virgil would not harm this human. He would not touch it. That was all he could promise himself. What do you have in mind then? 

“Nicole, please hold onto it. I don’t want it to hurt itself.” He shot Nicole a look, appraising, wondering briefly if it was having more fun than he was. Shouldn’t someone present enjoy themselves? Wasn’t revenge meant to be cathartic? If anything, Virgil felt worse now that he was actually going through the motions. “Remember not to look.” 

Virgil breathed a heavy sigh, and reached up to pull his glasses off. Red light switched instantly to burning white, a hundred times more potent than before. Kaden’s features brightened and brightened until they were nearly unrecognizable. Virgil stared into its eyes, unblinking and unfaltering despite everything, waiting for some sign of madness to take hold. You’re doing the right thing. It sure didn’t feel like it, though. 

Nicole’s expression shifted as Kaden admitted his fault. Helped. She clenched her jaw, no longer conflicted. It sounded like he was minimizing his real involvement. When she knew.  Macleod told her he was the one who set him on fire. She trusted her friend’s word. 

But she didn’t know what to make of his reaction. It wasn’t unfolding the way Nicole had expected it. The fact that Kaden put up no fight to his fate– A facade to conceal his fear? She didn’t want to acknowledge the possibility that he might not even regret his actions. No. She recognized guilt. Hated how familiar it was.  

Nicole almost looked back at the instruction, catching herself just in time. Even if the glasses hadn’t come off yet, she didn’t want to risk it. She glanced at Kaden instead, considering Virgil’s words. So what if he hurt himself? No physical harm, from their end, that was the deal. That wouldn’t be their doing, technically. And her restraining wouldn’t do much. What if he tried to fight her and escape? He won’t do that. She hated that she knew that. He had all but accepted his punishment. The voice in her head telling her she could still put a stop to this barely registered. If she gave her conscience more time to speak up, she would back down.

She moved quickly then, closing the distance. Gripping the hair on the nape of his neck, she forced him to keep his eyes on Virgil. Her gaze on the other hand, was fixed on the ground. The forest glowed brighter and brighter and her stomach twisted in anticipation.  

It. The monster– no, the fae was calling him “it.” It felt awful. Disgusting. Belittling. 

How many times had Kaden done that? How many times had he looked at a werewolf or a siren or a vampire and referred to it as just that? Not letting them be people in his own mind. 

It made it better. Easier. He wondered if that would be the case for this fae, too. But that would be his cross to bear at some point. Right now, Kaden would have to carry his own. 

Nicole pounced on him before he had time to react, yanking him back with impressive speed and agility. The skin pulling away from his neck as she gripped his hair wasn’t exactly a pleasant feeling, but the sting of betrayal hurt a lot more. He wouldn’t have exactly called Nicole a friend or best buddy or anything, but he had come out here to help her. He’d trusted her. Then again, maybe he shouldn’t have trusted the thought that anyone actually cared for him. There wasn’t a lot of reason to. 

Instinctively, he tried to twist away and out of her grip before he figured it wasn’t any use. He was outnumbered and wasn’t it what he deserved anyway? “Guess we’re not going to talk, then,” he said as he felt the fae approaching.

Was he going to die here? If he did, would they leave his body limp on the floor of the woods to rot? Would anyone care? Fear shot through him as he shut his eyes tight and he considered making good on Solomon’s promise for one second before he remembered why he was here. What this was in response to. 

Solomon might have forgiven him, but clearly he shouldn’t have. And he wasn’t the only one who had to. With a ragged breath, Kaden opened his eyes and stared into the red, mesmerizing glow. 

As he gazed, he could feel the world swirling around him, smell the stench of death. The red eyes turned gold and lifeless in his vision and his heart pounded in his chest as he tried to twist away from them, get away from what felt like the source. He could smell death and flames. They were coming. He was going to die here. And no one would know. No one would care. Kaden tried to hold back a scream, but he swore he heard it. He heard her. She was screaming for him. He was going to die here. 

A wave of something vaguely ill feeling passed over Virgil when Nicole took hold of the human’s hair. He could see the strain in Nicole’s arms from holding on, the pain on Kaden’s face made him want to say something. He wished he could tell Nic to be gentler, but it wasn’t his place to say. He knew that Nicole wasn’t going to follow up the threat by snapping Kaden’s neck, or cutting its body open. Nic didn’t seem like the type to do that kind of thing, or at least not without a very good reason. The rough treatment was probably just to send a message to Kaden that it was well and truly trapped. Yet, he was watching perhaps too closely, just to make sure. 

Kaden had his eyes shut, and Virgil was afraid that he might have to force them open. But after a moment of thought, it seemed to come to a conclusion, and made the decision to look on its own. Virgil stared back, glad that the bright light and deep shadows would make it impossible to see the rest of him, or the look on his face. He couldn’t feign cold joy, or even indifference. He was tired.

Kaden flinched, shuddering as madness took hold of it. Its features tightened, and it began to struggle. A few deep breaths let Virgil compose himself enough to speak in the clear, cruel voice which he loathed to use. “You will not harm Solomon again. You will not touch him. You will not think about him unless you’re thinking with compassion.” 

Virgil stepped closer, keeping his eyes fixed on the human, slowly drawing in until it was within arm’s reach. 

“Be calm,” he said, gentler now, trying to soothe it with his voice even as his eyes continued to beam into it. His palms pressed into Kaden’s face, sticky and cool, stroking its cheek with a thumb, claw angled carefully away from the squishy flesh. “It’s almost over. I know it’s frightening.” 

Fear and paranoia flooded his senses. Kaden could no longer tell where he was, who was with him? The forest looked dark and red, covered in blood, the trees expanding up and up, looming over them, waiting to swallow him whole. He could feel the branches holding him down, keeping him in place while they waited for their chance to shove him towards the earth and bury him deep beneath the ground. 

Solomon. There was a voice booming, coming from somewhere above him, both everywhere and nowhere, and it was speaking to him about Solomon. Would the leshy come help if he asked? Would he keep his word? It didn’t matter, he couldn’t form any, could only scream during the moments he could breathe.

Hands wrapped around his face. Cold, angular, rough. At first he couldn’t tell whose they were. Who was here? Would someone find him? Then he realized. He knew. He knew the hands. They were cold and rough and wooden against his face. The shadow looming above him bathed in red came into clarity and he saw the outline of the leshy. This was his revenge, this was what he had sought in the woods, what he almost got had Kaden not lit the fire. He could feel death closing in on him and it smelled of smoke and ash. The bark would bury him in the dirt, cover him in leaves, and no one would find him and no one would care. 

Virgil placed his glasses back on, pulling his glamour up for good measure. The light in the clearing faded, leaving only the pitch black of the night in its place. Now that he didn’t have to look, he turned his face away, taking a few seconds to compose himself. 

Kaden was screaming as if it was being carried off by Virgil’s mother. 

This was too much. He’d done what he’d come here to do, and it didn’t make him feel better. There was no point in pretending to ignore the suffering human any longer. 

Virgil took Kaden’s hand and pressed it to his chest, just over his heart, so it could feel the rhythm. Not quite steady, but better than nothing. At the same time, he leaned in, wrapping the other arm around Kaden’s back, holding it steady. He was careful not to disturb Nicole’s grip as he did. Kaden was too hot for a human, sweating underneath its layers, though it was expected while in the grips of insanity. He didn’t care if Kaden could even feel him, or if it pushed him off. He just needed to do something to make the creeping pit of guilt go away. 

“It’s okay. I know it’s scary. But it’ll be over soon.” He murmured into its ear, gentle, yet firm enough to be heard over whatever was going on inside its head. He prayed it wouldn’t snap and try to fight back. “Listen to my voice. I’m not going to leave you alone.” 

The figure turned away and the blood red turned into black around him. Kaden thought he might drown in the darkness. Something took his hand and he could only think they were going to lead him to the end, farther into the dark. No, he wasn’t ready to go, he didn’t want to– but he was being held in place and that felt like it would be his end, too. Panic sunk in deeper and his heart beat pounded in his ears. Then he felt it. Beating in his hands. It was slower than the rhythm in his head, irregular. Was that his own heart? Being drawn away from him? Winding down like his time?

Hands. Arms. Gripping. No, it was someone else; something else. Engulfing him, wrapping him. A shroud to suffocate him before he was buried, a blanket to snuff out the fire trying to consume him. It’ll be over soon. That’s what he was afraid of, that the darkness could still grow darker. He had to get out, dig his way out. Kaden tried to wriggle away, to find space, find the light, get away from the darkness trying to pin him down. It was where he belonged, he knew that, but he didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want to be at the end. 

Kaden did try to get out of her grip, albeit for just a second. Nicole almost would’ve preferred that. Survival instinct kicking in, to justify their actions even further. Her other hand gripped the back of his jacket, anchoring him as best as she could to the spot. Judging by the steadying breaths he kept taking as he approached, Virgil was struggling too. Second guessing maybe? No. They had to do this. 

The light was angled at them and Kaden’s body writhed under her grasp again, but something was different. It wasn’t resistance. It was just agony. Virgil was direct in his demand. Ensuring Kaden would never hurt Solomon again. Nicole kept her head low, her own heartbeat pounded louder with every word the shadow spoke, goosebumps erupting across her skin. He didn’t need that stare of his to be terrifying. His voice did the job just as fine.

Nicole couldn’t imagine what sort of internal hell Kaden was enduring, but his screams were unlike anything she had heard before. Virgil didn't lie, he was capable of driving someone mad. She wasn’t sure there’d be a person left once it was all done. Though being able to physically restrain Kaden was a big ask and it demanded most of her strength, it was his screams that she struggled with the most. She couldn’t take it. Why did she think her ears would be able to handle it? She wanted to let go, cover herself. Before he could burst her eardrums. 

The light vanished in an instant, but Kaden was still twisting. When she lifted her head she realized the glasses were back on. It was over. She didn’t understand Virgil’s next move, but she appreciated the extra hand to hold Kaden’s weight. “What are you doing?” she was surprised to hear her own strained voice in the darkness. Maybe it was a fae thing. Comforting someone after being responsible for his agony. It didn’t matter, because Kaden wasn’t with them right now. He was still inside, trapped in his mental torture. “When does it stop?” Does it stop? Virgil said it wouldn’t kill him. She couldn’t have this go wrong now.

“I’m trying to calm it down.” Virgil said to Nicole, mindful of the fact that he was still speaking into Kaden’s ear. “It needs to stop screaming. Sometimes it helps to occupy its other senses.” 

While his words stayed logical, he was far from composed at the moment. The noise was too much. Although he knew that his fears were unfounded, and that his mother wasn’t here, part of him expected to hear her crashing through the trees, summoned by the noises of pain, by the agonized wailing which always seemed to draw her like blood drew a shark. She would not give this human any mercy. She’d just toss him in some direction, get him to run, and then the chase would be on. That was a game she never lost. And when it was over, she’d come for Virgil to try again to get it through his skull that humans were not worth any amount of compassion. It should not bother him when they suffered because of him. But it did. It always had. That was not going to stop anytime soon. 

His grip tightened around Kaden as he listened to the trees. His mother wasn’t here. She couldn’t reach him here in White Crest. Yet, as Kaden continued to shudder and cry, Virgil grew less and less sure. 

“It’s different from person to person. But it should be back to normal in an hour.” He sounded too tight. Too strange. He needed to be calm so that when Kaden found its way back, it could have a presence to feel safe around. “You’re welcome to leave if you want. I can stay with it alone. I don’t think it’s going to fight me.” 

Stop screaming. Kaden heard the words ringing in his ears. He wasn’t aware that he was screaming. He didn’t know how to stop. He figured it would stop whenever the breath left his lungs and the thought made the screams even louder. The grip tightened around him. He would be thrown into the pit soon, he was sure of it. He’d be thrown into the earth and buried alive, smothered by the dirt and ash and the destruction he caused. He thrashed against the arms wrapped around him. “No,” he tried to say, unsure if words were forming. He had to get out, leave, before the sky caved in on him. He threw his elbows out, trying to swing his arms wildly so he could claw himself out of the pit and crawl away. He had to get away. 

Nicole’s grip almost slipped as another blood curdling scream ripped his throat. Her shoulders involuntarily rose up to her ears, trying to find a way to stop him from piercing her ears. Occupy his senses. If Virgil wanted to do that, he needed to be a little rougher. Take on more drastic actions. They had agreed to no physical harm, but what about that. Right about now – overloaded senses skewing her thoughts– it sounded like the ideal solution. She wrapped her dominant arm across his shoulders, seconds away from putting him on a chokehold to silence him. But she froze. Something stopped her. What if he couldn’t get out once he was unconscious? What if he ended up trapped forever? She was terrified of the burning in her chest, and the thought that followed. Would that be so terrible? 

Virgil’s words were enough to distract her from her plan and her thoughts. Her arms trembled, and she couldn’t be certain it was due to fatigue. Eyes widening in disbelief, she turned to Virgil. An hour? Nicole didn’t have to say it, it was written all over her face. She didn’t have enough energy to hold him for an hour if he trashed and twisted and screamed with the same intensity. But she had to trust Virgil. The one who had brought Solomon back to her. She felt indebted to him. She was only doing this because of him.

“Can we at least– help me get him… on the ground?” Without waiting for a reply, Nicole nudged the back of Kaden’s knees to take away his balance, bringing him to the ground with slightly more caution. Kneeling next to him as he continued to squirm, she gripped his shoulders to restrain him. She let him get it all out, as it was all they could do.

By the time the screams began to subside both in volume and frequency, Nicole’s arms were so stiff she could barely feel a thing. Minutes, hours, it had all blended together. It had gotten significantly darker, at least. She craned her neck, looking at Virgil. “Is this it?”

Virgil had very nearly turned on Nicole in the brief moment it’d tried to hurt Kaden. He’d been ready to drop his glamour once more and hit it with his eyes too, just to stop it from harming Kaden while it was down. But in the end, it’d given up the idea, so Virgil let the moment pass. 

It was not easy to restrain Kaden. Virgil wasn’t strong enough to simply heft it over his shoulder and carry it home, like he’d done countless times to countless humans in the Mirror. He wasn’t strong here, not with that cursed dizziness, and the feeling that he’d fall into the sky if he moved too much. But somehow, he and Nicole managed it. 

Time passed. The struggles lessened, and Virgil shifted from restraint back into comfort. He sat with Kaden’s head in his lap, fingers carding through the short hair in rhythmic strokes, keeping his hands busy so he could stay calm. It felt somewhat similar to Milo’s, though perhaps a bit less dry. Its body temperature seemed to be returning to normal. 

“I think so.” He blinked, as if coming out of a trance, and looked up at Nic. “Please be patient with it a bit longer.” 

Slowly, the nightmare started to fade away and reality began to poke through. The blood faded away from the trees, the banshee screams left his ears, and the darkness was no longer pitch black, but the night sky, littered with stars. The fear lessened and his heart slowed. Thoughts began to make sense again, he could rationalize what was real and what wasn’t more and more as time passed. Kaden’s head was pounding when things became clearer. He was lying down, mostly on the ground, at least that’s what it felt like, twigs digging into parts of his legs and side. There was someone stroking his hair. It might even have felt nice if it didn’t feel like he was waking up with the worst hangover he’d ever had in his life. There was also a pressure, something pinning him down. 

He tried to thread the thoughts together, make it all make sense again. He was in the woods; the trees were obvious enough. Why was he in the woods again? Right. “Nicole?” he said hesitantly, his throat raw and ragged. It was then he realized he was cold. Well, maybe not cold but he was shivering. He tried to push himself to sit up straight if they’d let him. “What the fuck happened?” He remembered death, everything felt like death. Putain, he sure felt like death right now. And he was pretty sure a bloody mary and greasy food and some advil wasn’t going to be the cure. 

If Nicole had known hurting Kaden would end up with them having to nurse him back to health, she would’ve considered twice before joining in on the torture. It felt incredibly wrong. Enemies didn’t spare that kind of decency to each other, did they? Kaden wasn’t technically an enemy, no, but he wasn’t someone she liked very much at the moment. On account of all the arson. 

She didn’t begrudge Virgil trying to comfort him though, merely nodding at his request for patience. Nicole didn’t understand him. But she also she didn’t know what it felt like to cause that sort of mental distress in a person, what it demanded from the fae. Maybe comforting was something he had to do, for Kaden or himself. Whatever the reasoning was, she was out of her depth. 

Virgil took Kaden’s head into his lap, and Nicole sat on the ground steadying her breath after the exertion. As excruciating as it had been to endured his screaming, now that silence had fallen, the ringing in her ears was only a slight improvement. With a frown etched across her face giving away her confusion, she watched Virgil stroke Kaden’s hair. The man finally stirred, coming back to the world. 

Nicole examined his face quietly, even when her name was spoken. What could she even say to him? Instead, she searched for signs of change. Differences that pointed towards Kaden learning his lesson. To justify what they did. But besides new creases carved on his skin from all the screaming, there was nothing else. Physically he looked about the same. And Nicole had to sit there, ears ringing, stomach empty as she tried to hold onto the disappointingly small amount of satisfaction she felt. Hearing his question, her gaze flickered to Virgil, wondering how he’d explain it.

“Don’t sit up.” Virgil pressed a hand to Kaden’s shoulder to stop it from doing precisely that. He was probably being overly cautious, but it was better to be safe than sorry. He was absurdly glad to find it at least acting more like itself. Not that Virgil really knew it. But he could sense the shift away from being consumed by agony. It was reassuring to hear it talk, even if its voice was shredded from screaming. 

Nic glanced at him, and he realized that it was going to be up to him to provide answers. His hands stilled. 

“My eyes drive humans mad. It seems like you had a strong reaction to them. We’re still in the woods.” Virgil peered down at Kaden’s face, searching for signs of abnormal stress in its face. His eyes were safely hidden behind his glasses, so Kaden probably wouldn’t pick up on the tension that still lingered there. But he didn’t feel like a human. His skin was sticky and cool to the touch, and his body never felt quite solid in the way that humans did. Kaden would just have to deal with his unsettling nature a little longer. 

“How do you feel? Can you tell us what you remember?” 

Kaden grumbled when a hand pressed him down to keep him in place and tried to wriggle out of its grasp. When he got halfway up to being vertical, the forest started spinning and he felt his stomach lurch, his head pound. With another groan, the ranger shut his eyes and lay back down where he’d been. Fucking couldn’t believe he had just been led to the forest, suffered some fae bullshit, and was some kind of fucked up hungover and lying in the goddamn fae’s lap. The cold of his touch almost reminded him of Regan which only made this whole thing that much worse. He cursed to himself under his breath but the pounding in his head was too loud to continue for long. Fuck this shit. 

The explanation he got wasn’t what he wanted. “Yeah, I got that much,” he said before rolling his eyes. “I know fae bullshit when I see it. That’s not what I’m asking.” Right, what was he asking, anyway? He tried to remember the moments before the terror had set in. The fae had asked him about Solomon. He felt a pit drop into his stomach at the thought. “Who put you up to this?” he asked, even if he wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to know the answer. 

“I’m fine,” he snapped, even though he clearly wasn’t ready to sit up just yet. “I remember an invitation to help. And some questions about a certain leshy. Still wondering why you’re here, Nicole.” His eyes bore into hers as he spoke, his jaw set firm as he watched her. He didn’t know the fae, had no previous interactions, so he wasn’t entirely bitter about them wanting to give a hunter some comeuppance, but her? They weren’t close, sure, but he was pretty sure he’d done nothing but try to help her in the past. He’d wronged a lot of fucking people at this point, probably too many to count, but he hadn’t thought she was one of them. He was sure she had her reasons but he damn well wanted to hear them. She owed him that much. Especially since she was still here for whatever fucking reason. Putain, he almost wished they’d just left him here so he could have dealt with the pain and the shame by his fucking self. 

Nicole dug into the ground, pulling at whatever she could find just to keep herself busy now that Virgil had Kaden. The anxiety spike was evident in the moments following Kaden's awakening. “No one put us up to this” she grumbled, and for a second she regretted even cutting him off. Was it the smart thing to do, to layout the plan? She was new to this revenge situation. Maybe she should’ve fled right after, forgotten about Kaden altogether. Put all of this behind her. Now that she'd gotten revenge, she no longer felt anything. Solomon was alive. There was no need to keep harboring any resentment.

Or so she thought, at least. Until Kaden wondered about her presence and the onrush of rage overwhelmed her. Solomon was alive, but it didn’t fix the weeks of pain. Didn’t erase the lack of sleep or how little she ate; nor the alcohol bender she had to immerse herself in to numb some of the pain. She gritted her teeth, because that 'fuck you' was on the tip of her tongue. When she managed to get words out, she was contained. “You killed my friend” Her first friend. Her best friend. Actually, maybe Kaden was lucky Virgil took pity on him and had a change of heart. She had to look away when her chest tightened, the beast clawing at her ribcage. Trapped. Starved. “I asked for your help to get you out here. So Virgil could– so he could– do that…” she gestured to the man on the ground, suppressing her desire to tell him how much he deserved it. One look at Virgil told her it was the wrong idea.

No one put them up to it. Huh. Kaden couldn’t tell if it was welcomed or disappointing. So Solomon had nothing to do with this. Did that mean he really did forgive him? That it was real? That maybe he– He shut his eyes tight, unwilling to get lost in the what ifs and the feelings and all that bullshit bubbling up inside of him.  

It hit like a punch in the gut. He’d killed a lot of people’s friends. And their partners. And their families. He was well fucking aware of that. And as much guilt as he felt, he couldn’t help but mirror her anger in defense, as a way to avoid the crippling guilt that was seeping back into his pores. “And your friend forgave me.” It didn’t matter that he didn’t know why. It didn’t matter that he didn’t believe he deserved it. None of it mattered in that moment. All that mattered was that it had fucking happened. “How do you think he’s going to feel when he finds out about this shit? Grateful?” He knew damn well that Nicole knew the fae a lot better than he did, but Kaden knew enough. 

“You didn’t even fucking ask what happened there,” he grumbled, trying to will his head to stop pounding. They didn’t know that he was protecting a kid, or that Macleod had thrown the pheromones to make the fae crumble, or that the forest itself was trying to tear them all apart. They didn’t know how long he’d been pinned down to the couch in guilt. They didn’t know he’d apologized, either. They just knew what he knew: that he wasn’t a good person. 

Nicole tilted her head, certain she hadn’t heard Kaden correctly. Her brow twitched in surprise. Solomon forgave him? When? It made sense, a reluctant voice chimed in the back of her head. Making amends with his murderer fell in line with the Solomon she had talked to not long ago. Nicole had encouraged him, in fact, to make up for everything he had done. The pain he had caused, the lives he took. She had held him accountable as best as her conflict averse self could. And yet she had gone and gotten revenge on his name.

Understanding she was being a hypocrite wasn’t enough to stop Nicole from acting like one. Not when she was beginning to realize the wound from losing him was still open and festering. “He’s done worse” she whispered, stomach sinking as she used her best friends actions to justify her own. “I think… he’d– he’d understand what it feels like”. Whether Solomon agreed or not, it was something she didn’t want to think about now.

“We know enough” Nicole replied, trying to pay no heed to the sense of doubt slowly creeping inside her. She trusted Macleod, she wouldn’t lie to her about his responsibility. “You set him on fire” she pointed out instead. Something he seemed prone to, at least in her experience. She clenched her jaw, relenting from arguing further. Fuck this shit. The fire in her gaze vanished as she looked into Virgil’s glasses. “You wanna hear his side? cause I fucking don’t. He seems–fine. We should leave”.

“I don’t want to know what happened either. It doesn’t matter now, does it? Solomon was sick. Perhaps you had a good reason to do what you did, or you were only defending yourself. But you still burned him alive.” Virgil echoed Nicole, trying to remain on its side despite the fact that he was attempting to comfort Kaden. His own burns, though long healed, began to sting. “It’s a horrible way to go. Nobody deserves that.”

It didn’t surprise Virgil that Solomon forgave it. The leshy was far kinder than anyone deserved. He was a well of endless patience for Virgil’s struggles to adjust to this world, and that extended to everyone else he met. Nicole seemed to be friends with him for a similar reason; she seemed to be wilder than most humans here were, more at home in the woods than with her own kind. Solomon was a balm for restless, lonely souls. Virgil was trying to do the same for his friend, to nurse him back to health and help him with the guilt that came from his actions while under the influence of the Tree. Perhaps forgiving Kaden was a step along that path. 

Virgil shared Nicole’s desire to leave. He was done with the situation too. But he couldn’t justify leaving Kaden alone in the dark just then. 

“It’s been a long night for all of us. I think we could benefit from some food and rest. My house isn’t far.” He patted Kaden on its shoulder. “Try to stand up. Slowly.” 

Of course they didn’t want to know what happened. It would complicate their narrative. It would make this feel worse. Kaden sure fucking knew all about that. Part of him wanted to spare them the pain of complexity. The rest of him wondered why the hell he was the only one who had to bear the weight of all the fucking moral complexities of the world. “You’re right,” he said as he slowly tried to stand up. “I threw the lighter. Wasn’t trying to kill him though.” The world was spinning. Putain. He held his head in his hands a moment before carrying on. “I was trying to deal with the fucking killer plants all around, not sure if you remember those.” There was no way Nicole of all people had missed the memo on that one working where she did. 

Alright, he guessed he could try to take a step. Nope, bad idea. He paused again and bent over, placing his hands on his knees. “Guessing you also missed hearing how he–” Even Kaden couldn’t be that glib, not if he really thought about it. “How everything took hold so fast,” he added, looking up at Nicole once more. Because if they did, he was pretty sure he wouldn’t be alone up here. Her name was on his lips, tempted to point out that Macleod had also been ready to kill the leshy, had also made moves to do so, and also had to live with the consequences of all this. Still, it felt wrong to just drop her name, put a target on her back. Fucking inconvenient that hid moral compass decided to point north now instead of fucking earlier. “Unless of course you gave someone else this wonderful fucking treatment. But you tell me.” 

He took a deep breath and tried to walk again. This was going to take a while. “Your house?” He looked at the fae. That sure seemed like a bad fucking idea. “Going to your house? After that?” Kaden couldn’t fucking process this. “You gonna promise me not to fucking do that shit to me again?” Putain. He had been so careful with that word for so goddamn long, too. 

Nicole stood up, arms crossed over her chest watching Kaden get back to his feet. She gripped her own bicep to stop herself from doing something stupid, like– god forbid, helping him up. She listened to him recall that day, reminding her of all those months suffering because of that tree, but she didn’t say a thing. Because that would mean coming to terms with the fact that her thoughts contradicted each other. The tree deserves to burn, but Solomon didn’t? When in reality, they had been one and the same, as Macleod had pointed out to her too.

And though Solomon had been present in her mind all throughout the night, as Kaden questioned the fate of others involved in the fae’s demise, it was Alcher who came to Nicole’s mind. She thought of the wolf’s revenge tirade. The one that led her to turn her back on her found family. Her biggest regret. She understood then how easy it was to go down that path. To hunt every single person responsible for her pain. Her throat tightened. She finally understood, and she wished she could’ve told her as much. 

Nicole held Kaden’s gaze, shaking her head curtly. She didn’t want that, she had learned from the wolf’s past too. She wanted to be done with it tonight. She was willing to put this behind, whether Kaden agreed or not. He probably needed time to lick his wounds, that was all. She had to accept –albeit reluctantly– that he was entitled to harbor whatever grudges he deemed fair. She was thankful for Virgil, who was ready to put an end to this and head back. “He stayed with you until you were awake,” she defended the fae, letting out a weary sigh. “He’s not gonna hurt you” she swallowed, forcing the next words out of her mouth. “I don’t plan to either”. The idea of the three of them under the same roof after all that seemed like the most fucked up sleepover ever, but she was too tired to go her own way. “Lead the way” she told Virgil, eyes still fixed on Kaden as he struggled to walk.

Virgil watched Kaden move, making sure it stayed on its feet despite the wobbliness. Though not quite normal, it was upright, which meant it was time for Virgil to get on his feet too. He gathered his legs under himself and stood. It was always unpleasant to move his head so drastically, since it always made the dizziness worse. He’d stopped fainting outright, but that wasn’t saying much. He swayed, vision going black, tuning out the conversation until the head rush subsided, a hand going to his temple. 

He listened with half an ear as Kaden told them why it’d done what it did. And Virgil found that he couldn’t fault it for what it was saying. On some level, Virgil thought that what Solomon had done was… not right, or justified. But a part of him still trusted the version of Solomon who had been cruel to the humans, who did not love or care for them. He didn’t know why. That Solomon made more sense to him than the one that’d returned from the fire. He would never trust the word of a human over that of Solomon, no matter how sick his friend had been. But he could perhaps see what it’d been like for Kaden, and how difficult it must’ve been in the moment to differentiate Solomon from the tree. He did not expect a human to possess mercy, or to understand the devastation wrought by death. 

Kaden’s dismissal of his offer was expected. However, Nicole’s defense of him wasn’t. Virgil glanced at Nicole, surprised it stuck up for him against Kaden’s questions. He’d have expected it to have similar fears to Kaden about his abilities after seeing them in action for the first time. The maddening gaze was dangerous, as he’d demonstrated today. It’d called him beautiful after seeing his true form the night they found Solomon’s body. Virgil would’ve understood if it no longer felt that way. But it seemed, at least for the moment, Nicole was okay with him. He appreciated it, since he didn’t have much to say about the accusation except that he couldn’t promise Kaden would be safe with him. Perhaps it’d become his friend in addition to Solomon’s. 

“For tonight, at least, you’re safe with us. You won’t come to any harm in my home.” Virgil turned slowly in the direction of his house, making sure that Kaden and Nicole were following. “I find that a full belly makes forgiveness easier.” 

[braindeacl]

Ashes to Ashes | Eilidh & Nicole

SETTING: The National Park. TIMING:  Recent. PARTIES: @nicsalazar & @braindeacl SUMMARY: Nicole and Eilidh check on how the Park is recovering after the death of the Tree. However, the topic of Solomon’s death turns a day at work into something more.  WARNINGS: Alcoholism (mentions)

The hint of the sun peaked over the horizon. It would be another half hour until the two would be blessed with her full beauty. But Eilidh didn’t mind, enjoying the one below. Land that looked like it never knew sickness. Nature was tenacious as ever — absorbing in the roots and filtering out the haze. The reason the two found themselves working together, watchful eyes ever gazing, to check on the Park’s restoration. The trek had been quiet. Not from a sense of professionalism, which she vigorously did without. But from a joy of those sweet sounds returned to the air, ones lost in that sickness. A comment would pass a lip; perhaps an observation or odd joke. But mostly she wanted to delight in this renewal. Though it wasn’t in totality. Not yet. Scattered here and there along their trail were those red fruits — those damn bane-berries — which met her boot like all the others. Both legs looked as if they were splattered in blood, which wouldn’t be strange for them.

As their journey went deeper, and the trees went denser, they suddenly found an opening. An emptiness with ash seeped into the soil. Eilidh remembered that day, those fires that screamed. And even in its absence she could see it. Big One. That shadow on the town branded into her mind. She stared at the space, imagining the missing piece and growling at the thought. Wishing in part it was still there so she may feast. But her eyes returned to the present, returned to their watchfulness, and in that sea of gray she found green. Sprouts of life returning. She knelt down, pressed a finger to the patch. Just enough for a nudge, like a parent urging their child along. She smiled at the sight. “Looking better than last, eh? Knew you could do it.” Her head turned up to look at Nicole. “The seeding’s taking in nicely.”

Nicole hummed absently at the question, before realizing her companion wasn’t addressing her, but the ground instead. The corners of her mouth twitched at Macleod’s action, watching with something akin fondness in her eyes. She could be in worse company, Nicole figured, allowing herself –if just briefly– to stay in that moment. That was, until the context surrounding their journey sank her heart. The destruction caused by the tree had stretched across town, taking over parkland as well. Restoration would be a long process, and all they could do for now was to ensure nature had the best chance possible.

She wished to mimic the other’s excitement. Maybe in the past she would have, but coming up with something positive to add to her observation was proving harder than she anticipated. They were empty words. Nicole couldn’t find joy in the new sprouts. Not when they were still remains of the tree’s creation all around them. Not when she had to mourn a friend because that tree got into his head. “Yeah…looks like it” Nicole settled for, adding a nod only to appear engaged. She slowed her pace, giving Eilidh more time to assess the forest floor. She was the expert after all. In the meantime, her boot sank deeper than necessary into the soil, the sight of the fruits bursting underneath bringing perhaps too much joy for her sanity. Did the tree suffer in its demise? She really hoped so. If that thing truly had been sentient, she wished it went on to agonize till the very end.

She crushed yet another fruit, watching the juice soak the underbrush while she pondered. “You feel this is the right price to pay? You know… to have that fucking tree gone?” the inflection in her tone was more rhetoric than anything, but she still wished to hear Macleod’s perspective. Moving ahead, Nicole intended on continuing their trek. Her goal wasn’t to rush Macleod, but she did want to get out of that particular site. “I’d like to finish this area today, if that’s—“ she trailed off, opting to nod forward instead.

The shift in Nicole was as sudden as the breeze. Blowing away the sweet ease Eilidh had come to enjoy. Leaving behind a sorrow as the wind died. She wasn’t surprised at the change. Forest fires were devastating, even if she kept reminding herself they were simple acts of nature. While this lacked that forgiving quality, and the reminder stayed tight-lipped, all birthed a twisted knot in her throat. A gravity found in her own heart, wanting to pull her into the gray. If she looked into it too long, let the gray consume her as it surely wanted, it reminded her of home. Her first home. Where she was born into the world but may never return to. For once it went into flames it no longer belonged to her. Reduced to nothing; regrown into something new and unknown. And that’s what the forest was doing now. Regrowing. But this renewal was joyous, stripping the Earth of infection, and she hoped Nicole could join in the revelry. But, no. The blue in her heart remained despite the green. Like a flood overtaking a valley. Perhaps Nicole too had old fires that still burned. She just needed more time. Yes. That’s it.

Eilidh let out a huff. A silent exclamation; a gentle annoyance. That fucking tree. Souring the pleasant mood that she had tried to reclaim. Lost again to the Big One. Relenting to a fire in her eyes — the very same that turned green to gray. “Not at first. Tree was dead.” If the truth had been as simple as the statement, she would’ve left. With fingers still itching and teeth still hungry, but she would’ve left. But the leshy. Attacking him was simple hunger at the time. A way to fill those yearning hands and teeth with something ripe. For he was; anyone who allied themself with Big One was. Yet, when her hunger calmed, when time made her mind clearer, she realized how needed his death was. Big One’s own death must’ve beckoned him — he who wielded plant magic. He who could return them too soon, so that the tree may finish the job. “But only matter of waiting til they returned.” There was a grunt in her throat, for she still was struggling to accept her next words. She may never fully. “Fires stopped the return.” She knew this, yet there was no victory in her voice. Her hand stroked the soil, like a mother to her kin. Knuckles brushing against the sprouts as her voice tried to find any form of gentleness. “But not yours, eh, sweeties.”

The tree was dead. Nicole turned to Macleod, head tilting as if new information had been revealed. She stared at the woman, really processing her words. It was only then she realized she had forgotten that detail. Split in the middle, dead. Right, of course. People talked for days about lizards and— She knew that, yet grief had somehow ripped that memory away from her. Frustration closed her throat, tears already forming in her eyes. So much she didn’t understand, even more unanswered questions. How many chapters did she miss? The tree had been dead. So why was it then, that her friend had to die such a horrible death? Where did things go wrong?

A shaky breath left her lips, and she wiped the tear escaping from the corner of her eye. She could chalk it up to the residual gas around them, if Macleod were to ask. But Nicole knew she would be spared of interrogation. She liked that about her companion. In return, she let Macleod dot on the sprouts some more before continuing down the trail. Something in the back of her mind would not let her move on from the subject, though. Curiosity more than anything, although the embers of revenge still burned. It tickled mildly inside her chest. “If it was dead… why would it return?” Nicole figured there was no one better person to ask. Macleod’s knowledge of the forest was practically unmatched. Except for— Well, she couldn’t exactly turn to Solomon for answers anymore. And that would be just one of the many things she would never have with him again.

But ignorance was no fucking bliss, and maybe learning from the expert could open new paths for Nicole and Virgil to follow. “It was dead, what was the point of—” she repeated, bile rising to her throat. She was thankful Leah got rid of the tree, but something wasn’t clicking for her yet.  Her friend's death became more senseless as she thought about it. Was it just arson? An accident maybe? 

The sounds of sorrow pulled Eilidh away from the green, back to the blue. One that was rising, pouring out into tears. Stiffness found her; not from fear, but alert. She stood, the motion already planned but now finding new purpose. Body waited, prepared for those tears to turn to waves. Waves that were still at bay, breakwaters holding true. Still, she kept a watchful eye. Mouth wanting to act too, lips parting but releasing nothing. People were so easily embarrassed. A fact she often didn’t let stop her, for embarrassment was fleeting. But this was a known friend, and the care that brought made those prying questions die on her tongue. Besides, she was certain she knew what was troubling her. The fire. Perhaps ones of old too, that still burned. She focused on the questions, providing answers instead of more of her own.

“Was a Leshy. The two were, were fucking friends.” Last word more a hiss, as Eilidh motioned to that empty spot in the sky. But if he had his way, it would still be occupied. Made a permanent home of, at that! “Wanted to return Big One too soon. Gloiceil.” Frustrated chitterings filled her throat, as if all that time hadn’t passed. As if she were returned to when the plants gained that first layer of ash. As if she could beat one more strike on them both: mother of sickness and her ally. Feast on the ripeness one more time. Until Eilidh remembered those present tears, burning cheeks like those flames. The grumbling stopped with a cough. “I hate the fires, same as you.” She thought of the one who lit the first spark. Started a fire that hungered like the infection. She hated him for it, for killing all those forced soldiers and then some. Even though time told her they were already gone; the infection too deep.

Still, the reminder, the new focus for aggression, made a return to Eilidh’s grumbling. But much deeper, and swiftly quieted. Making way for more words. “But the soil’s got no more sickness. Is what I focus on.” She nodded. Fire was cleansing, she always had to remind herself. When the ash wanted to choke, to do away with her like it had her first home. But, how silly to be sad of it. It was a gateway — both an end and a beginning. A part of the cycle as any. Despite how much it screamed. Still screamed.

The sight improved as they continued their path. Fire hadn’t swept with as much voracity over this side of the trail. Maybe it was a reward, after spending hours surrounded by nothing but devastation in the area. Nicole kept her pace slow, her assessment of the landscape more superficial than the forester’s. Until Macleod’s answer came, and her body stiffened at the unexpected information. How many leshy could there be with ties to the tree? She had to be referring to him. She opened her mouth a few times, forced some words to come out, but the wheels in her head turned faster than her tongue could keep up with. Memories trickled down faster after Macleod unlocked the first one. And Nicole attempted to put everything together in a way that didn’t look as if she had just received the worst news of her life.

Solomon had been hiding after the tree first got hit. Nicole had tried reaching him several times, even visiting his sanctuary. But with no success. Why was he with the tree when the first fire broke out? Macleod answered that for her before she even had chance to ask. Her stomach plummeted. Oh, Sol. Of course he didn’t let it go. Of course he wouldn’t be happy. That tree had twisted his perception of duty to a point of no return. Her curiosity piqued, though. Surely Macleod had to know a lot about his plans to make the claim he would try to bring the tree back? Why couldn’t he be there just to mourn? Hands balled into fists. Normally, Macleod’s attempt at changing the subject wouldn’t have pissed her off as it did then. I don’t care about the fucking fire, she wanted to scream at her. Whole place can go up in flames for all I care. Her brow furrowed, angry heart pounding in her throat.

She placed a hand on a tree to steady herself. And when she finally managed to speak, she was proud of how non-chalant her voice sounded. “Oh. You knew Solomon? The leshy. That’s his—” Was. It was his name. As much as Virgil believed he was growing again, there was no certainty that this new being would be their old friend. “I mean— How did you… I know— Heard he had some… interesting ideas, for the town… I think”.

Eilidh watched that whirlwind of emotion, but did not shy away from its winds. The concern on her face became solidified — determination set in her heart. Gentle reminders were not enough, the ash was too potent. Nicole’s voice may be lost in its choke, but Eilidh’s wasn’t. Her own opening to tell Nicole she could handle the rest. She would handle the screams alone. But just as Eilidh uttered her first syllable, Nicole finally remembered her voice. Eilidh blinked curiously. Solomon. She had heard the name recently. Well, seen it recently. Hadn’t she? Yes, there was a whispering in the back of her mind saying so. But where? Such a wondering that was dismissal in comparison to her next realization. Nicole… knew the leshy? By name! The concern in her eyes became hard to find, for they both squinted in suspicion. No, no, no. She knew Nicole — not intimately, but more than her other coworkers. She wouldn’t want to hurt the town, the forest, her loves. Was she infected? Unfounded care placed in her heart as it had with Bex? No, no, no, Nicole’s boots had squashed those bane-berries with such ease. She hated Big One, too. Yes, she did! It was so clear in her eyes.

A great huff escaped Eilidh, as if that breath could push out her internal feud. Unease wanted to make its home in her. But she trusted Nicole. She did. Seeing the sadness in her eyes, the weight of it wanting to pull her down to the ash, made Eilidh’s own eyes soft. Whatever was troubling her friend, she didn’t want to add more. The only thing to be added was more answers. “Saw him… ‘round.” There was a small bite to her voice, but not directed at the one she spoke to. The ire focused on the images in her head: of things twisted into unrecognition. “Infecting others. Like Big One.” If only she had done something then. But compassion had gotten in the way. “Why you speak of him with a softness? He was friends of Big One.” That bite in her words lingered, yet there was a genuine want to understand. Shown by the look in her eyes.

Nicole shouldn’t have felt such a fight or flight response after learning Macleod had seen Solomon before. But she did. She spun fast, lightheaded as she rushed back to her companion. She found herself eye to eye with Macleod for the first time in all their hike. “When” she rasped out, the eagerness in her voice squashing any indifference she had previously managed. If Eilidh had seen Solomon during the time she thought him missing, then maybe someone else saw him too. And if someone saw him too, then it was possible he had made more enemies. Enemies that would’ve loved to watch him burn along with the tree. Like that witch Virgil claimed was involved. Yes. She needed to know more. “When was this— when did you see him?”

As much as she would’ve like to explain her friendship with Solomon to Macleod, Nicole didn’t have the time. For her it was hardly relevant. Especially when she gathered Macleod wasn’t his biggest fan. Instead, she found more questions of her own. “How do you know that?” Yes, he had tried to sell his vision of a world without humans to her. Infect her, as Macleod put it. But Nicole had thoughts of her own, dammit. Just like anyone who may have heard him. If those people fell for it, if they got sucked into the cult, then they were the stupid ones. He wasn’t infecting anyone. He believed he was going to build a better world. It was that tree— Big One, whatever Macleod called it.

If only they had more time, maybe someone would’ve make him come to his senses. Nicole couldn’t stop picturing his charred body scattered around the zone. She could still feel his blackened heart in her hands. He did not deserve the same ending as the tree. Did Macleod think so? If she were to know about the agony Solomon endured in his death, would she be happy? Would she revel in his suffering? She stepped closer, jaw clenched tightly. She had tried to stop her anger from winning this round too many times. Tried pushing it aside and not let it drive her grieving again. But it looked like Macleod hit a nerve, and she finally had a perfect scapegoat in front of her. “You don’t know shit about him, Ellie”.

Nicole was a blur of movement. As if the grief forgot its hold, or Nicole forgot it had a hold. Eilidh didn’t care for specifics. All her mind processed was Nicole’s sudden closeness, sudden intensity. Her growl was as short and sharp as the movements that caused it. Hands curled and knees bent for an attack. One that never came. Right. It was Nicole. Yet her presence did not spark the usual ease in her chest. Agitation had already had its hold on her limbs, but the feelings had suddenly shifted towards her friend. Her lips curled, but the remembrance of their bond kept the snarl at bay. “Moons ago. N’ close to now.” Each sharing that leshy, he who twisted and infected others. Though the first was in retribution for the harm done on the land, and the second being the land. And while her attempts at ending his life had twice been halted, they also differed in cause. One from compassion, the other from the fires that had brought them there. The fires that should’ve been the focus. “The hell’s it matter?” It didn’t make sense.

Eilidh absorbed that change in demeanor. Trying to find its unsaid meaning. Nicole was more entwined with the leshy than she was letting on. Shown by that intensity. But why? Eilidh’s mind kept finding a solution with the infection. “You eat a fruit?” She was certain, but there was something off in the certainty. Nicole's boots were still stained by the fruits’ blood. Was it making itself harder to notice? It made more sense than her friend being sympathetic to an ally of Big One. But, well. Maybe she didn’t know Nicole as well as she thought. The false name she used was a testament. Could she even trust her? Liar, liar, liar, liar, liar. Yet, the wetness on Nicole’s cheeks, reminders of her grief, made those thoughts hard to hear. The only thing finding hold was a growing confusion.

Still, when Nicole’s intensity turned to aggression, her bitter thoughts did find some fuel. Her teeth became bared. But, still, Eilidh couldn’t do any sort of threat with them. “Know fucking ‘nough. Felt he dinnae mean much harm at first. But I saw him turning flesh to plant. Like he was helping turn plant to flesh.” Remembering how people struggled to follow, she hesitated. Struggled herself, head shaking. “Uh, to motion. Made ‘em mad ‘n bite. ‘Gainst their wills. Flowers to soldiers! Infecting. Twisting.” She let out a huff. “Fuck.” Would Nicole even listen? She knew words could break the spell of the fruits, but would hers even be enough. “Why d’you care? You eat a fruit? You did? Aye, aye, aye. I can help. I want to.”

Her scowl faltered for a second, a flash of confusion crossing her features as she added another piece of information to the puzzle. Another detail Nicole already knew, but had slipped her mind somehow. Fuck, she really needed to lay off the bottle. Virgil mentioned an attack, yes. Whoever was involved refused to leave Solomon alone. The witch came to her mind again. Was that all connected to the story Macleod told?

Nicole did not back down, however, because her body would simply not allow it. The anger burning in her chest was almost palpable as Macleod couldn’t find it in herself to sympathize with Solomon. She wasn’t entirely sure how she resisted the urge to grab her and shake her into understanding. “It was the tree. You don’t–” she threw her head back, an exasperated groan scratching her throat. Her vision blurred with unshed tears again. “It had this…control over him. He– he… it–” To find the right words, string perfect sentences was already a struggle when she wasn't angry. But when she let her emotions take over? Near impossible. The tears though? Those never failed. It only made her angrier, ashamed of herself. “He wasn’t the same. After he met this tree. The leshy you met… he wasn’t my friend” It had been tough to come to terms with it when she last saw him, but to say it out loud was crushing. It wasn’t fair.

“Enough with the fruit!” Macleod wasn’t the enemy, a small voice in her head reminded her. But she sure felt like one. And her muscles tensed, aching for release. The erratic beat of her heart signaled to her that maybe it was better to let it out rather than to keep building. She couldn’t risk awakening the predator inside her. Nicole surged without thought, shoving Macleod away. She didn’t need her help. “What I need is to know who killed him…” so I can do that to them, so they can feel– “That’s all I need. I don’t think you can help with that. So– keep him out of your fucking mouth. And just– just… there’s a trail to finish”.

Suspicion had a firm hold on Eilidh. Directed at Nicole — to words that may be sourced from another. Plucked from a grave and placed in her mouth. Making what those words tried to convey hard to settle. Her suspicion a fierce protector against the potential deceit. No. Nicole must be lying. Infection spilling out Nicole’s mouth to try and worm into her head. Yet, it made too much sense to her, allowing it to trickle in. The leshy… had been infected? He who she thought was compelled by the same urge as her doubts. A protector of greens — to a fault. Protecting Big One even as it devoured all the other greens. One who was ancient and powerful, yet still forced to a knee under that thrall. Of course. No one would want a true connection to Big One. The realization could’ve made her laugh, kin to the one when she saw Big One’s corpse. She nearly did, mouth twitching in wanting. But the doubts did not leave her side. Nicole neither confirmed or denied consuming the sickness. It could be trying to trick her now, to get her to think… something?

No. It made too much sense to Eilidh. As the tears began to lose hold on Nicole’s eyes, so too did the doubts. Not relenting fulling — leaving scratches on her brain as they slipped. But, slip they did. Those fresh cuts in her mind filled with a want of redos. A chance at another with more knowledge. To prevent her hands from acting on one who’s sick. To prevent those tears from shedding from one who’s friend. A hope that was pointless. Wills of the heart could not change the past. Yet she found herself lost in those potentials. The present, the present, the present. She had to stay in the present.

Eilidh was abruptly reminded why. The hands on her shoving her back into her feet. Into those bared teeth, which snapped before her mind returned. Hands rushed out to Nicole, returning the action with equal measure and without thought. But thought finally did, finding itself the last. It made quick on her body; forced it to tighten in realization. Whether to stop herself from acting further, or to prepare herself for a following blow, she wasn’t sure. Perhaps a strange mixture of both. It left her feet unmoving as Nicole continued. Alone. Presumably. But Eilidh’s thoughts stayed with her, followed those tears. She could not unmake them, but perhaps she could help quell. Despite the chattering of her teeth and straining of her fingers, she still wanted to help. So, once more, she answered that question in the air. “Kaden.” The name turned into a grunt in her throat. “Fucks name’s Kaden.”

Nicole almost retaliated. Almost. She was ready; fists shaking, eyes fixed on the cheekbone she planned on breaking. It would’ve been justified, she told herself. Macleod pushed her too. Maybe all she needed was to let some steam off. But the name on her friend’s lips rooted her to the spot, dissolving any idea of violence she previously entertained. She couldn’t follow through, even if she wanted to. Kaden. It wasn’t an unfamiliar name for her, and it was making it harder to quickly absorb the information and act accordingly.

White Crest was a small town, but not so small to only find one single person named Kaden, right? Would the Kaden she knew try to start another fire after the last one he caused destroyed so much of the park? Didn’t he learn his lesson? But what were the odds, really, of another man named Kaden walking around the woods with an affinity for starting fires? She needed her assumptions to be confirmed. She needed—

And then what? Nicole glanced at Macleod, no longer seeing red. A simple name had tamed any desire for revenge she may have harbored inside. Logical thinking kicked back in, and she didn't feel so brave anymore. What was she supposed to do? She frowned deeply, the name Kaden ringing in her ears. Ignorance was no fucking bliss, she always told herself that. If she asked for confirmation, at least she would know. For once she’d have closure. Answers. Those that had been so elusive ever since she woke up from her transformation six years ago. It was a foreign concept, and maybe the reason she was too stunned, confused on how to proceed. In any other circumstance, she would’ve liked to know how Macleod knew this information, but her gut said she wouldn’t like the answer. “Langley?” she managed to get out, taking a step back to assure her companion she wouldn’t attack.  “Kaden Langley?”

Eyes that had cried tears onto Eilidh’s anger became consumed with the very same thing it had tried to calm. Like the lighter in the man’s hand, only the spark in Nicole’s eyes was needed. That burst of anger, like flames. Fire was quick and overwhelmed Eilidh’s own before Nicole could blink. Instincts commanded her hands forward, her teeth to continue their chatter with a vigor. She would not be made prey of. But fire was quick after all, and left Nicole before it could fully burn. For the first time since the talks of the fire and the leshy and the connection of the two, Nicole looked herself. No restrained tears or strained breath. Just Nicole. Eilidh found her own fires still lingered, not wanting to let go so easily as before. But in its smoke, a wondering was born. All her previous reveals of knowledge had been met with tears or aggression or both. There was something else. A missing thing. Frenzy of her mind, of the fight that was never to be, left her thoughts failing to find any sort of answer. Turned her into some blinking, confused thing. Instincts told her to keep her thoughts in her hands instead of her mind, for that fight may, could, would still be on the horizon.

But then Nicole spoke the name with familiarity. The surname was unfamiliar to Eilidh, but she didn’t believe in simple coincidences. No, Fate was at play here. Still, her curiosity forced her tongue, “Pissy? French?” Nicole knew the man of fires, enough to temper her own for reasons left unknown. A fact that would’ve stoked her curiosity further in another time. But her thoughts were strictly of what was present. Watching how the flames directed at her seem to die. If there were any left, the space Nicole put between them would keep those flames far out of reach. There was a beat as her instincts still struggled to accept the change in atmosphere. Body still stiff, still waiting. Another beat, another nothing. Her arms finally lowered, back straightened to something more civilized. Yet her eyes still carefully watched. 

Nicole was certain having a name would spring her into action. That the fire at the pit of her stomach would only grow, and the knowledge would lay out the next steps. Fuel her path to revenge. She had attributed her misery to the lack of answers for so long. But it turned out, knowing left her just as empty. Same gaping hole in her chest, even more confusion. Why? She bowed her head slightly, attempting to nod. Yes, french guy. Nicole didn’t understand. She thought Langley was one of the good guys. But it was her fault for assuming, just because he helped her once. Wouldn’t be the first time she misjudged someone. Maybe he was out there wandering the woods right now, ready for his next attack. Fucking arsonist.

She glanced at Macleod then, who looked unusually alert. Ready for Nicole to blow up a second time. She was too shaken to feel guilty about that yet. Thank you, she thought, but her mouth didn’t open. Her mind was occupied processing the information to let her body function. As the anger flushed out of her body, embarrassment crept in. “Uh,” How did they move from this? She couldn’t apologize, even if it would’ve been the right thing to do. She didn’t want to, her actions got her what she needed. Or thought she needed. She raised her hand. Just an inch, thinking about patting the woman's arm. To make peace in the only way she saw possible: By ignoring what happened and finishing their shift. But she stopped before she could reach Macleod. It wasn’t a good idea. Not when Macleod could misunderstand her intentions and attack. Couldn’t blame her.

“I’m… thanks for—” Nicole swallowed, stepping farther away from the woman. Her eyes darted around, lost. What now? “We should… we shou— Gotta finish…” slowly, she walked away. She was unsure of her ability to focus during the remainder of the trail. But she needed to get away, needed to be done with her job and process the new discovery. More importantly, she needed to tell Virgil about it as soon as she could. He’d know what to do.

Eilidh watched her still with that careful gaze. The only part of her that thought it could be careful, limbs still locked in unused momentum. Waiting for another shove to spring her forward. Her mind had already done so, lost to a whirlwind of emotions since the topic had began. Aggression was easier for her. An aggression that had been suppressed time and time again, from tears and the care it birthed in her. Despite the clawing in her throat that wanted to be made physical. She didn’t want to hurt Nicole. Not really. At the most basic level of herself, she wanted to help. Still wanted to help. But with a shove and the fires that followed, the aggression found kindling and alighted in her. It felt justified, and in justification it didn’t want to let go. It still felt it was needed, even when those fires in Nicole’s eyes died to make way for confusion. If her own mind wasn’t as lost as Nicole's, perhaps she’d offer more help. But that would require a sense of comfort, which her tongue and mind had no want for, at least not then.

But the distance between them grew larger and Eilidh had space to breathe. It was unneeded action; brought her no physical relief. Yet there was something innately calming about releasing a breath. It took away some of the building pressure inside her. The pressure caused urgency, made the exhaust a huff instead of a sigh. Ended with a growl, one that had no true target, it just felt good in her throat. And then her throat remembered how to speak. “Fuck the job.” She ran a hand down her face, but not across her eyes. “Am going for a walk.”

[humanmoodring-retired]

Feline A Little Clawstrophobic ||Nicole & Nadia

TIMING: Back in April  PARTIES: @nicsalazar & @humanmoodring SUMMARY: Two cat ladies walk into an elevator CONTENT: Drug manipulation (balam ingesting catnip)

Lack of focus was always a problem for Nicole, but it was safe to say things took a turn for the worst in the past weeks. She was hardly present anymore. To the point where she jumped on her truck and drove aimlessly for hours. Like sleepwalking but conscious, she mused. It was better to drive than to walk, though. Not only because she was forced to do light activity after breaking her ribs, but it was better for her if she put her mental energy into an easy task. Walking used to be how she processed things, and she wasn’t ready for it. She couldn’t think about that night without fear constricting her throat.

Wandering around the shopping center was manageable. It would take real bad luck to break her bones again. Nicole held onto a bag items she didn’t recall buying, and tired of just circling around the same places, she headed towards the elevator. She pushed the button for the first floor, but as the doors were closing, another person entered. The eye contact was minimum before she lowered her gaze, shoulders tensing at the presence. Her lips pressed into a thin line. The woman would be able to tell it was meant to be a smile, right? It didn’t matter, in a few seconds she would never see that stranger again.  

With the weather getting less shitty, and with her body healing more and more each day, Nadia was slowly but surely getting more comfortable with going out and doing things. And, seeing as she hadn’t done shit for her own birthday but it was well over a year since she’d found and rescued her cat, Rhiannon, Nadia decided she was going to do something nice for the little fucker. She was grateful to have the cat back in her apartment, even if she woke up with a giant mound of fur crushing her. It was a good reminder that she was still alive. She’d gone to the store and bought a few cat toys with her groceries, ended up snagging a thing of catnip before she was starting to feel fatigued and decided it was time to head out.

The woman in the elevator with Nadia felt like grief and fear and something numb, familiar and numb. Even if it was probably not as overwhelming as it could be, something that she was beginning to expect from many of the residents in White Crest, it was still a lot, and she felt herself tensing up in response. Still, she managed to give the woman a tired smile of her own and a murmured “thank you” before she shifted her weight a bit and waited for the elevator to take them down. Except there was a grinding noise, a jerk as the elevator came to a violent stop. Nadia grabbed at her side instinctively, even though she wasn’t at risk of stitches popping open this late in the game. “Shit,” she hissed, looking around, trying to figure out what was going on.

Nicole lifted her head when the elevator came to an unexpected stop. For a split second she expected the doors to open for another person, but the woman’s reaction made her realize what was happening. The elevator malfunctioned. They were trapped. “Uh—” she swallowed, slowly processing the situation. The feeling of being caged wasn’t exactly one she was fond of, and she fought to keep her rising anxiety in line.  She let out a nervous breath, eyes fixing on the emergency button. “It— it should be fine” she shrugged, leaving her bag on the floor. The less effort she made carrying extra weight the less oxygen she took out of the room, right? “Un— less...unless there’s a blackout or some— some shit like that” She pulled at the extra hair tie on her wrist, absently playing with it. What could be worse than being in a confined space with a stranger? Even her nightmares were nicer than that. “But... it’ll be fine” she met the woman’s gaze through the mirror on the wall, before pushing the button a few times. When she took a deep breath in, something tickled the back of her throat. Brow furrowed, she glanced at the woman again, trying to decipher her scent. Nothing was particularly strong, yet— she licked her lips, trying to concentrate on the smell.

This was cool, this was fine, Nadia thought as she felt her own nerves mingle with the stranger’s. She wasn’t a fan of tight spaces, she was learning, the way it reminded her of being able to look out her own eyes but not move as she lacked control of her own body. She dug her fingernails into the palms of her hands, the gesture grounding. She was real. It was a shitty situation, but she was real, and she was fine. She almost wished she could walk through the fucking wall like she was still a ghost. Almost. She never wanted to be like that again. “It’s totally fine. Someone’s gonna come, and, yeah, it’ll be fine.” The other woman just really kind of radiated a sense of anxiety that Nadia couldn’t quite get over. This was great. This was why she didn’t get out much. “Just my fucking luck,” she muttered. “Go to the store and get stuck in a damn elevator.” She leaned against the wall and slumped a bit, her bags hanging by her side. When she met the stranger’s eye, she tried to give a half-hearted smile. The other woman’s emotions had changed a bit as her brow furrowed, though Nadia couldn’t quite tell what it was. “Is the, uh, the help button working, or are we in a dead zone?”

Right. It was a good thing they were both staying level headed considering the situation, Nicole thought. Everything would suck so much more if one of them started panicking and sucked all the air in the small elevator. She looked down, hiding a smile at the woman’s words. It was nice to know she wasn’t the only one annoyed by the situation. Had she been better at conversations, she would’ve enjoyed spending the time complaining about shitty luck and poorly maintained machines with her. That was a thing adult women bonded over, right? “No… don’t think it’s working” very slowly, she lowered her hand, as if she still held a glimmer of hope that something would happen. She retreated back to the opposite wall, licking her lips again. What was in the air? It was familiar, yet she couldn’t place it yet. Some sort of plant. Nicole blinked once, twice, tongue poking between her teeth. Wide brown eyes stared intensely at the other woman. Searching, assessing. And then— She took a bite of air. Oh, no. Her heartbeat raced. In the back of her mind she was aware of what was happening, but she didn’t think she’d be able to stop it. Fuck. Still conscious, she tried to pass off the odd movement as a yawn. Good, quick thinking and — Oh, it was creeping on her so, so fast. Premium shit, it had to be. She didn’t think she’d care for long.  “I’m— I’m...do you—” poor woman, Nicole smiled lazily. “Have...cat?”

“Oh, good. Hey, I was worried this would be resolved quickly, right?” Nadia sighed, running a hand through her hair and hoping she wasn’t coming off as an ass. It was just, fuck, being stuck in an elevator wasn’t exactly how she’d imagined to spend the day, and at least she wasn’t alone, but she also wasn’t alone, which meant she had to deal with herself as well as someone else. Normally, she preferred that, preferred that she could focus on someone else instead of herself for just a bit, just a fucking bit, but maybe not while both of them were stressed over being stuck in a goddamn elevator. Nadia liked being able to focus on positive emotions, or even fun emotions like anger. Not anxiety. She had enough of that on her own. There was no need for anymore, thank you. She checked her phone. Yep, yeah, that seemed about right. No fucking service. She bit at the inside of her cheek before she felt a wave of just… mellow wash over her. She looked up at the other woman, the smile on her face and the look in her eyes, and Nadia raised an eyebrow in confusion. “Uh, yeah. Yeah, I’ve got a cat. She’s a total asshole. I actually came to the store to get her a few things and…” she trailed off. “Do you… like cats?”

Nicole inhaled deeply, enjoying the absence of stiffness on the side of her chest. She took in as much of the scent as her lungs allowed. The cast on her wrist was forgotten. The effect was much stronger now that her brain recognized the minty fragrance. She tilted her head back against the wall, transfixed by the emergency lights. “Fuck” she let out a breathy laugh. “I’m so so—” she wanted to apologize, knowing she would embarrass herself, but the words faded from her brain. Nice. “Mmm...I’m cats” She closed her eyes, a blissful smile plastered on her face. It was hot inside the elevator, Nicole registered. But for a few seconds there was nothing to worry about. No dreamscape, no cliff, no anger getting out of control. Just the fast beat of her heart to focus on. Not quite euphoric yet. She needed—  craved more. The scent just wasn’t enough. Her mouth was watering. Pupils were blown when she opened her eyes again. She got off the wall, taking a few clumsy steps towards the human. She offered a mischievous smile, nodding at the bag. “Hey... c’mon” she pleaded softly, before getting close enough to peek inside. Her prize. It was driving her wild. She gripped the human’s wrist, forcing her to lift the bag, before rubbing her face against it. Almost. Her patience ran out quickly, the human was so slow that she smacked the bag out of her hands, content spilling on the floor. She dropped to her knees, trying to rip the catnip bags open.

“What the fuck do you mean, you’re cats?” This was a little weird, even for Nadia, but she couldn’t deny that this chick’s emotions? They felt so much better than her own. Pure fucking contentment and happiness and relaxation. It’d been awhile since she’d felt that, and, sure, maybe it wasn’t full-throttle, but, god, it felt nice. It was weird as hell though. Nadia backed a bit into the wall, pushing herself against it. The woman grabbed Nadia’s wrist, the one that had been snapped sometime during or before the exorcism, and Nadia winced. “Hey, hey, no grabbing, let’s not-- let’s not grab, okay?” Nadia… knew this feeling, sort of. She recognized it from the few college parties she’d been dragged to, the way she’d felt it coming off of people from the crowd and filling her, making her want to go back for more. “Dude, are you-- are you fucking high right now? How? We’re in the-- you just spilled my shit, holy fuck.” She watched as the bag of catnip and toys spilled out on the elevator floor and the woman went down to the ground. “I just bought that. Fuck. Wait-- you’re cats. You… you want the catnip.” Okay, cats. Cat people? Cats. This was fine. This was totally normal. “I’m stuck in an elevator with a high cat lady. I wish I was a high cat lady,” she muttered, and she slid down the wall to sit, shooting the woman a tired look. But, hey, at least she was relaxing.

Nicole heard the sounds. Words, she knew. Vaguely. Not that it was ever her strength, but she couldn’t exactly form a coherent sentence at the moment. Her head bobbed without a clear direction, attempting to nod. A cat lady. Curious eyes observed the woman for a moment, waiting for some sort of reaction, any reaction to her trying to tear the bags opens. She was rude but not that rude. It confused her, tilting her head as the woman quietly slid down the wall, but it was the permission she wanted.

She crushed the catnip between her fingertips, nostrils flaring when more scent was released. All tension left her body. Nicole was weightless. She brought the catnip to her mouth, getting a taste of it. A hoarse grunt escaped her mouth. Shit. Shit. Her body tilted forward in slow motion, until she couldn't keep her balance and face planted on the ground. She rolled on her side, letting out a strangled laugh. Something out of the corner of her eye made her jump. She was ready to pounce when she realized— Oh right, the forgotten human. She could enjoy the catnip too, otherwise why did she buy it? Nicole wasn’t selfish. She pawed the air, until she got a hold of her sleeve and pulled her down to the floor. She laughed at that, before breaking down some catnip.  “Here…” she mumbled, her clumsy hand rubbed it in the woman’s face.

There was a woman getting high off of catnip, and Nadia was stuck in an elevator with her. That was what was happening. That was her life now. At least the woman seemed to be enjoying herself. Nadia could feel the relaxation and ease that was working its way through the woman, and it was nice to hear a laugh. Nadia managed a small one herself as she watched the woman struggle with movement. It was funny. It was enjoyable. It almost made being stuck in an elevator for the near future something that was almost tolerable.

Or, at least, Nadia could have believed that it was tolerable until she was pulled over and down to the floor with a groan. “Hey, no, no-- fuck.” She was on the floor with a woman that was high on catnip, and that woman was dragging her down and rubbing catnip in Nadia’s face. Sure, it smelled alright, but it wasn’t, like, weed or shit. “That was for my cat,” Nadia said, her tone dry as she plucked a piece of the catnip out of her hair. “But, hey, glad you’re enjoying it, you know?” It was hard to stay mad with the good vibes.

Nicole gave the woman a blank stare. She wanted to understand what she was saying, she really did. The words were floating above her, but they sounded like a foreign language as they reached her ears. She hummed in response, trying to keep a serious face. Whatever she was saying sounded important. Her cat, something about her cat. Her smile kept growing however, stretching until it hurt her cheeks. She buried her face in the bag again, taking as much as she could before discarding it somewhere on the floor. She allowed herself to close her eyes for a moment, eyelids heavy as warmth swept her body. The sensation was barely familiar. But it wasn’t new, just long forgotten. Like feeling loved or cared for. Being safe on her mother’s lap. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt anything similar.  

Jealousy filled her chest. The human had to be a great cat owner. How come no one was doing that for her? She turned her head to see the woman, watched her remove the catnip from her hair and while confusing, the message was understood. “Oooh” Nicole would’ve been embarrassed by what she was doing. So embarrassed that she would’ve considered moving out of town. But when the scent of catnip was impregnated in every corner of the elevator, shame was hard to register. A clumsy hand reached out to help, patting her head with no delicacy and tousling her hair in the process. Her human brain still pushed to communicate, thank the woman for bringing such a nice gift to her. Making her feel safe. But words kept failing. Instead, she settled by her side, gently pressing her forehead against the woman’s shoulder. Her breath slowing down.

The cat lady, who was a different kind of cat lady than Nadia’s type of cat lady, was well and truly high on catnip. Of all the things that she expected to happen when she came to the store, this just wasn’t it. Maybe, like, getting attacked by one of those fucking mime creatures. She could have seen that happening. Or maybe the sky raining fish. She’d been there, done that, even if she didn’t get the t-shirt. But this was… a little weird. Not the worst thing in the world, but a little weird. It was hard to be too mad, though, when the woman was smiling and felt genuinely content. It was weird as hell, but she wasn’t, like, malevolent. Nadia had been in worse situations.

“Shit, fuck, ow, yes, thank you, thank you, that’s very nice,” Nadia said as the woman swattered at her head. It was just like dealing with Rhiannon. If Rhiannon was a grown ass woman that was swatting at Nadia’s head. Really, it was practically the same thing. She reached up to fix her hair before giving up and resigning herself to it. Then, the woman leaned against her, calm and relaxed and, yeah, okay, maybe Nadia relaxed a little bit, too. Despite being locked in a fucking elevator, this really, really wasn’t the worst. “Maybe don’t, like, fall asleep. Just in case someone comes to get us out of here, soon.” But she was also a little tired. Just a bit. Not much. But Nadia was always tired. Always. But this was kind of relaxing.

Nicole could hardly remember what her life was before she was on the elevator floor cuddling with a stranger. Nothing extraordinary, surely. But she couldn’t care less. The back of her head was tingling pleasantly and that was all that mattered. She had a moment of utter relaxation and she was going to make the best of it. The human beside her wasn’t too bad either. She made a decent cushion compared to other human cushions, and some of the catnip scent had impregnated on her clothes, making her perfectly comfortable. She barely registered what the woman said, because it was time for a nap. And what was more important than that? So she hummed, letting silence fall on them as she enjoyed the best moment in her miserable 27 years of life. Nothing was going to ruin it.

The floor underneath them shook abruptly. The metallic sounds so jarring to her sensitive ears that her body jumped, suddenly on high alert. Nicole was on her feet faster than it was humanly possible, taking her surroundings in. Her brain was foggy, and though it felt like she should’ve been worried about the source of the sound, all she felt was confused. Not yet conscious, but the sensations gradually subsiding. She narrowed her eyes, staring at the woman on the floor with a puzzled expression. “Wha—?” she let out a big laugh, trying to understand why a woman would be lying on the elevator floor in a mess of bags and herbs.

Nadia was resigned to this. This was her life. She lived in this elevator now. She’d never get home. Her only hope was that Ms. Carmody would see about Rhiannon when it appeared that Nadia wasn’t going to go home. She’d never leave this elevator, and she’d die being essentially cuddled by a stranger that was high on catnip. Her saving grace was the second-hand relaxation that poured off the woman in waves, making Nadia not totally perturbed by her situation. Really, it could be worse. There were more tragic ways to go out. More terrifying ways. More nightmare inducing, memory tugging ways that she thought about all the time. This? This was fucking peaceful. Nadia could allow this, even if she’d miss her friends, her people. She was relaxed. She was chill. She was--

She was jolted away when the elevator started moving again, as well as when the woman moved. Nadia sat up, brushing the catnip out of her hair for real this time as she looked around them. The elevator door opened up, and she stood, grabbing her things. There was a guy that opened the door.

“You ladies alright?” he asked.

“Fine, totally, appreciate it,” Nadia said. She looked at the other woman who was still dazed. “We, uh, we should get off.” Nadia couldn’t tell what happened, but she’d gone from high to coming down relatively quickly, and that seemed to have left a lot of confusion in its wake. She didn’t even mind being laughed at. “Unless you wanna stick around the elevator, that is.”

The rumbling continued, and the elevator began to descend. Nicole felt as if she was being pulled in two drastically different directions. On one side, she tried to navigate the thick fog in her brain, recall important information, like who the fuck was the woman with her and why was she suddenly fond of her. On the other, she gripped the sidebar, her stomach filling with the primal urge to hunt down whatever monster was causing those awful sounds. It didn’t make any fucking sense. She gritted her teeth, but it wasn’t enough to contain the hiss she directed at the emergency lights. Her cheeks flushed, embarrassed. Great. Her awareness grew, but somehow so did the grogginess. Part of her was falling asleep while the other was waking up. And no one seemed to agree on who was going to take control yet.

When she looked down again ,her companion was sitting, brushing off whatever it was she had on her. Cat...nip, she read on the bags. Catnip. The wheels began turning faster. She breathed out, relieved to be able to read. The scent was still floating in the elevator, but it had no effect on her anymore.

The smile still playing on Nicole’s lips faltered, and as the door opened, everything clicked. Well, fuck. The woman’s voice came, and she saw part of her confusion reflected on her face. Nothing but babbling sounds came out as she tried to speak. God dammit, what did she do? And why did she still want to laugh? She nodded curtly at the suggestion, picking up her bags and following the woman. She clenched her jaw, wondering if she could spontaneously combust due to the humiliation. The doors closed behind them and there was silence. “Yeah, uh— sorry about...” she shook her head, pointing in the direction she was about to go. Making a mental note to never leave her house again. “Know what? we...we don’t have to,” they didn’t need to talk. Ever. Why bother? “We’re just not gonna...never” she continued to nod, gripping her bag with sweaty palms. Yeah, that was perfect. She turned around, too scared to wait for the woman to add anything. Eyes fixed on the ground, she bolted towards the nearest exit.

[thronesofshadows]

Salt Bridges (pt. 1) || Nicole & Evelyn

TIMING: A couple weeks before Christmas LOCATION: Al’s Diner PARTIES: @nicsalazar​ and @thronesofshadows SUMMARY: Nicole and Evelyn go out for dinner and find out they might have a little more in common than they previously realized.

Seated in the most secluded spot she could find, Nicole’s fingers picked at the extra hair tie on her wrist, looking up every time the door opened and the wrong person walked inside the diner. She was never early to any kind of appointments. Being early meant second guessing everything she thought she  knew. Questioning whether she had made it to the right place, on the right day or at the right time. Worrying about plans getting cancelled and not getting the corresponding text. Going back to recheck the information multiple times, though she had done it a hundred times before. She was always five minutes late to everything, perfectly calculated, to avoid that. She had to be early for this one, however. Against her better judgement she had invited Evelyn to a diner. A very loud one, it seemed. She couldn’t shake the feeling that food had been a bad idea. The worst kind of activity to do with someone she had only met once. The pauses, awkward silences, the sounds, the mess. Terrible, just terrible. She breathed out, forcing herself to not go there. Pointless to dwell on it when she was already sitting there, fifteen minutes earlier than they had agreed on, going over the menu for the tenth time. Besides, Evelyn had to be the nicest person she had met so far, she probably wouldn’t care. She wanted to spend time with her, right? No? She had never been to Al’s diner before, but she quickly understood the popularity. The smell was driving her insane. When Evelyn walked through the door, her frown finally relaxed. She sighed and offered a shy smile, keeping her gaze on the woman until she spotted her. She averted her eyes down to the menu as she approached.  

Nicole was unlike anyone Evelyn had ever met. She didn’t usually eat, and Al’s was certainly not her usual sort of place, but if that was where Nicole felt most at home, she would agree. Though it seemed a bit contrary to what she knew about Nicole. She hardly minded. She could easily get a salad here and pick at it, let Nicole talk about whatever she needed to - or wanted to. She’d arrived a couple minutes early. The buzzing of the diner would have been overwhelming if she concentrated too much on it, and she was more than a bit puzzled about why Nicole had chosen such a place. Perhaps she had a certain craving for a burger. Regardless, Evelyn adjusted the skirt of her dress and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her head before she pushed the door open. Nicole was already there, she realized, gaze focusing in on the other woman. She made her way over to the booth, one in a far back corner that wasn’t right in the middle of everything. Okay, that made more sense given what she knew about Nicole. “Apologies for keeping you waiting.” Evelyn raised an eyebrow, nodding at the menu. “What looks good?”

She shook her head dismissively, eyes darting to the clock behind the register when Evelyn apologized. “Hey...uh, think you’re right on time, I just— ” she trailed off, unsure where she was going with that sentence. She just needed some extra preparation. Her fingers drummed on the menu, waiting for Evelyn to get comfortable in her seat. Fortunately for Nicole, the table provided enough space between them. She would’ve hated having to worry over the woman stepping into her personal space for the entire evening. Her biggest concern was the eye contact, almost impossible to avoid when Evelyn was sitting in front of her. Out in a diner, really? Bad idea. Terrible idea. Should’ve asked her for a walk instead. She cleared her throat to keep those thoughts at bay, giving the other woman a strained smile. “What looks...good?”, the repetition only served to buy herself more time to think. She lifted her eyebrows, seemingly forgetting everything she had read a minute ago. “I’ve...never been here before—first time” she couldn't recall who had recommended the diner to her, but they had clearly made a lasting impression for her to come up with it on the spot. By the smell of it, the burgers definitely won. And the fries. The chicken too. She couldn’t hate the waffles either, despite the milk. “Gonna take a wild guess here...but I think the burgers are kinda their thing” she let out a chuckle and pointed at a particular picture hanging on the wall, displaying a monstrous looking burger. “Would you eat that one?”

“I am often early, but it pleases me to see that you are, too.” Evelyn couldn’t help but smile again. There was something about being around Nicole that made her feel calm and at peace with herself. Evelyn often considered herself a fairly calm person, but there were people, whether she wished to admit it or not, who brought about a feeling of even greater calm, and Nicole already seemed to be one of those people. Even if she was human, she was a delightful partner in conversation, even if Evelyn could tell that this didn’t always come so easily for her. Furthermore, despite the fact that it had taken a good amount of persuasion, she was willing to let Evelyn dote on her and purchase things for her, which was always a plus in Evelyn’s book. “I cannot say that I am an expert on any of this,” she flipped through the menu, glossy painted nails tapping against the plastic. “Well, it is a popular place in town, or so the rumors say - it is often filled up from what I can tell.” She crossed her legs. “Well, I do think that is how diners go. I - well, no, not unless it is vegetarian, but I fully endorse you trying it. After all, is there not the cliché of when in Rome - and I am well-aware that we are not in Rome, and that I explain my jokes too much but I say go for it. I think I may get a salad.”

“About that…” her laugh was strained and nervous, but felt the need to explain. “I just— had to make sure I got a booth I wouldn’t...” pick up too many things. “Get overwhelmed by—  Sorry to disappoint but, I’m not— I’m not usually...this punctual” it felt strange being honest about it, and though her eyes darted everywhere in the room to avoid looking at Evelyn, she preferred it. Nicole was sure the other woman didn’t need the explanation, but seemed to be the way things were meant to flow between them. She glanced down at the menu again, but her brain was fixed on Evelyn’s tapping, distracting her. Most of the time she was capable of tuning out things like that, anxious thoughts occupying her brain enough to ignore sensory stimuli. Being so out of her comfort zone appeared to be affecting her in different ways. She tried her best not to pay close attention to Evelyn. Felt like intruding. The words pulled her back to focus. She assumed vegetarian options existed, but Al’s wouldn’t be the place to get them. “No, it’s...salad might be the better option”. Could she eat that burger? Yes, she was certainly capable of finishing that. Wouldn’t be pretty at all, however. She had a healthy appetite, and blamed it on being part-animal. “The…” she glanced at her with narrowed eyes, repeating some words under her breath. Cliché of Rome? What was she talking about? Sounded familiar, but she couldn’t recall what the saying meant. “I— I don’t…” Her smile was sheepish, but she was saved by the waiter approaching to take their order. She nodded to Evelyn. “I think she’s...her mind’s made up.”

“Of course. Do not worry, even if you are only punctual this time, that is still more than enough.” Evelyn grinned. “Remember, this is all about whatever works best as a distraction for you, and if this is working, then I shall certainly not fault you for that.” Had she been a more tactile person, and had she assumed Nicole was, too, Evelyn might have reached out to offer a hand to the other woman, but things being what they were, she instead held back. Not yet, and maybe not ever, but she enjoyed Nicole’s company regardless of anything else, and for now, that was what mattered most of all. “Salads are usually nice, and even if it is not of the highest quality, I did not come here for the food, solely.” Especially because I do not actually need human food in order to survive, though it was not as though she could tell that to Nicole. Not now, at least - perhaps, if they continued to get along as well as they had thus far, she would be able to be more open, but not yet. “Sorry, it is a cliché. When you are somewhere, you might as well do what is customary. Or something to that degree.” She shrugged, glancing up at the waiter. “I have. I would love a Greek salad and just water to drink.” She flipped her menu shut and let Nicole order, watching as the waiter walked away before focusing back on the other woman. “So, how is this for a distraction so far?”

“Right, yeah—“ Nicole let out a nervous breath, a thankful half-smile reached her lips. It was slightly overwhelming that Evelyn always knew the right thing to say. Almost too understanding. She wondered if that had come with all the training she experienced as a kid. A fleeting, less logical thought followed. Could she—? Maybe she was capable of reading minds. Crazy, sure. She had seen weirder things in her life, though. Shaking her head, she frowned at the absurdity. People just happened to be good sometimes, she reminded herself. “Yeah—- wouldn’t pay for a restaurant salad, really…” Maybe being an ex model had something to do with her concern for healthy eating, but if Evelyn wanted salad, then she’d pay for it. “Good thing you aren’t though… cause this one’s on me, okay?” quirking an eyebrow, she raised a finger at her. She had to remind her, just in case. Yes, she had invited Evelyn for more than food. It was strange. When they talked online, she knew exactly why she had needed her company. But now, everything seemed incredibly hazy. Something about...bones and pens? Why would she need to talk to Evelyn about that? She watched in silence as the woman placed her order, her pulse racing at the thought of going next. She asked for a beer first. That would put her into a chattier mood. Then she tripped over her words to order a chicken sandwich, after she was assured it came with a portion of fries. Would she eat that? She wasn’t sure, but at least the hard part was done. “I— uh...never been more distracted in my life” it was the truth, at least. Whether it was a good thing or not it remained to be seen. How long could the food take to be ready, 15-20 minutes? That was a lot of time to fill with conversation. She could get through it. “Thank you, by the way—for coming,” she lifted her eyebrows as she met the other woman’s gaze, surprised by her own voice. “Gonna owe you...a couple guitar shows.”    

Everything with Nicole felt strange and new, even if the overall pattern of their conversation was hardly anything abnormal. Evelyn shrugged. “Some are good, maybe this will be one of those cases.” Not that she entirely minded either way. Human food was human food in the end, and though she certainly preferred that which tasted better, it never served to nourish her in the way that nightmares did. “Okay. Only because you did permit me to purchase that guitar for you and because I find myself rather fond of your company.” Evelyn raised an eyebrow. She enjoyed the time she had spent with Nicole so far as well as the conversations that they had, and so she saw no reason to do anything other than agree to spend more time with the other woman. “It is okay. Sometimes we find ourselves more keen to be distracted than others, and this is no fault of yours. There was a time a bit ago when I found myself unable to sleep for a long while and I know my focus was less than ideal.” She offered a shrug at the other woman’s remark. “Of course. I find your company enjoyable, and I have been looking forward to spending more time with you ever since we have met.”

Nicole nodded, despite being suspicious of the diner’s ability to deliver a decent salad. Though if Evelyn wanted to order something else after, she wouldn’t have a problem with that. “Good” her hand tapped the table with finality, as if her words settled their agreement. Her eyes stayed fixed on the table, struggling to shake the awkwardness off. She didn’t understand why Evelyn liked her company. A woman like her was likely to know people far more interesting than her. Better conversationalists too. But she was trying not to second guess herself too much. Unable to find the right words, she moved onto the next topic. “Was that— were you under stress or…?” She understood the connection between lack of sleep and lack of focus, but it was often triggered by something. “Never been too good at sleeping” her gaze lifted slightly at the admission, focusing on Evelyn’s shoulder. Her leg bounced under the table. For the longest time, she was haunted by the thought of going to bed and not waking up again, her body transforming in her sleep. “Guess... I was bound to end up with issues” it would’ve been easier to see a specialist, she reminded herself, though that would imply she was willing to get better. Her nerves caused her to laugh again, as Evelyn repeated she was good company. She was genuinely puzzled as to why. What had she offered that one time that seemed to go over well with Evelyn? Maybe she could keep doing that, with other people. Did people give each other feedback like that? Deep down she knew there was no magic formula. Maybe Evelyn was just trying to be nice. Embarrassed, heat rose to her cheek. “That’s...yeah— I think I...I do good with...bossy people. Not that— you’re...” she noticed the waiter approach, and she breathed out in relief “it’s not...not a bad thing”.

Evelyn sighed for a small moment, though it was evident that it was not out of frustration but merely out of relief in the comfort and ease that Nicole’s company provided. “Of course.” She watched Nicole’s fingers drumming against the table. “In a manner of speaking.” She didn’t wish to go into it with too much detail; didn’t want to risk explaining seeing giant eyes - Nicole didn’t deserve having to deal with that. “Luckily I was able to work through it, and that is all behind me.” Other things weren’t, other odd sleep behaviors weighed heavily on her mind - because she wasn’t supposed to have faults with her sleep, if anything she was supposed to be the one in control, particularly the negative ones that had seemingly overrun the town. “Oh? That is the case with a number of people. Even when you were a child?” She looked over to Nicole, though there was not a speck of judgement present on her face.  “Well, I do not think this guarantees issues. Sleep is incredibly complex, you should not fault yourself for anything.” She bit her lip to hold back a laugh at Nicole’s next comment. “You can call my bossy. I am well-aware I can be, though I think that the tutors I had as a child preferred strong-willed.” She fought away the urge to roll her eyes. Evelyn watched the waiter come back over, dropping off their drinks and a few tabletop condiments - including salt. Evelyn grabbed her drink quickly. Salt wasn’t even a proper condiment, though she supposed many people liked to have it on top of their dishes. “Well, so far so good, I think.” She nodded. “How are you finding it?”

“I’m glad it’s in the past,” she nodded. The fact that Evelyn had managed to work through her sleeping issues gave Nicole some sort of comfort. Maybe it would pass, maybe she just had to be patient. “Light sleeper” she raised her hand, as if she was taking the blame on something. “Noises and...I’m—sensitive to it,” she shrugged, debating whether to continue or not. “It got worse after…” no, she should’ve stopped. Being a light sleeper was one thing, nightmares were something entirely different. “Bad stuff happened” the tight smile she gave after her words felt odd, but she didn’t Evelyn to feel uncomfortable. She was used to bad sleep anyway. Wasn’t so bad. “Strong-willed, huh?” she repeated, her eyebrows rising as she broke into a smile. “Yeah, you terrorized those tutors, I bet” she pressed her lips together, trying to suppress her grin. Although she felt for the adults in charge, she found the thought of a spoiled little girl bossing tutors around very entertaining. Why did a kid need so much tutoring anyway? She should’ve been playing free outside. Regardless, bossy was good in her mind. She needed bossy in her life. She was never inclined to take the lead on anything.  Someone willing to push a little was a change she welcomed. She leaned back in her seat, letting the waiter place the condiments and the drinks. She shook her head when he offered to pour it in a glass. The bottle was fine. Without even realizing, her hand ghosted over the table before reaching for the salt shaker. Instinctively, she slid it to the end of the table, towards Evelyn. Then she rearranged the rest of the containers. She often had salt in her meals, she even favored that type of food, but she didn’t want to risk the chance of an accident in public. Her distraction meant she had lost track of their conversation. She looked up at the question, eyes widening. “How am I— finding what? oh...” she glanced down at the beer in her hand. She lifted it, sending Evelyn a questioning look.

“I am as well, as the case may be.” Evelyn looked over at Nicole with a kind expression. She didn’t wish to lie to someone who may well have been human, but explaining that her sleep expertise went beyond just being a childhood (and still) bookworm with too much time on her hands. Anything beyond that was too much, she knew that - even though she also knew that keeping the truth of what she was hidden away could only serve to cause trouble. She chose not to focus on that right now, and instead focused onto the woman across from her. She found that Nicole was someone incredibly grounding to be around, and she didn’t know why. Instead of getting all done up about it, she’d decided to ignore that and focus on how pleasant it felt. Even though the idea of having friends was still a relatively foreign and odd concept to Evelyn, she didn’t think to question it with a select few people - not Nicole, and certainly not Miriam - to a degree. Others too - Deirdre for one, even Lydia, before everything (and she chose to not think about all the what ifs) - things she never would have expected years ago when she’d been shut into her home, accompanied only by her nannies, tutors, and housekeepers. “You are permitted to be sensitive to noises - not that, well, obviously I am unable to control that - not that I would, if I could, I think people controlling whatever it is someone is dealing with is unjust, but I am sorry that you have that. It is no bad thing, we are all different.” Her gaze softened again. “Bad things? You do not have to expand, but should you wish to, I am able to listen. I am even quite alright at it, most times.” She sucked on her lip for a moment. “I think they used that in lieu of any number of other words they might have preferred to use were my father not their main source of income.” She scrunched up her face. She watched Nicole play with - rearrange - the salt and felt her shoulders tense up just slightly as she pushed it over towards her. Evelyn took it, careful not to touch any of it too much, and pushed it with the tip of one nail away from them, back to where the waiter had first placed it down. “Yes, that.” She nodded. “Though it may not be the quality that you could have if you came to my bar, I hope it suffices.”

Nicole’s eyebrows rose again, surprised to see the woman string a sentence with less eloquence than usual. Rambling didn’t seem to be her thing, but she had definitely over explained something that seemed obvious. Her eyes narrowed, finally looking at her face. “I know,” she said simply with a subtle smile, her voice small but calm. Had she been braver, she would’ve asked if she had issues with control. But she didn’t want to risk upsetting her if that was the case. Her eyes darted outside, a break she needed from the current conversation. When Evelyn offered an ear, she almost smiled. Her kindness wasn’t surprising. Or the way Nicole’s eyes began to tear up. She got rid of them, blinking quickly. God that was embarrassing. For once, the idea of sharing part of her story wasn’t terrifying. Time. It was the one thing she needed. The one thing stopping her from speaking to her. It seemed unquestionable that with time, Evelyn would be able to coax the truth out of her.

“I know” even smaller the second time. Nicole shook her head. “We all got baggage, no?” she said instead. She doubted anyone living in a town like White Crest was completely normal. The way she spoke about her tutoring sounded a lot less amusing than what she had pictured first. She frowned. “Was that… did you rebel against them? Or just— you being a kid”. With an apprehensive look, she noticed the way Evelyn moved the salt again. Maybe she was very particular about condiment placement? It was a little too close to the edge for her liking, though. If anyone were to run and— No. She was too paranoid, what were the chances of that even happening? She let the saltshaker where it was. They would be fine. Moving it again would look odd. “I’ve had a lot worse, trust me” the taste had never mattered much to her. Not when it used to be about getting drunk above everything. Tilting the bottle, she took a gulp. Yes, not great, she confirmed with a grimace. “I think I’d like some of that quality alcohol, though” She’d have to save for that. “How’s your...water? Sure it’s fancier at your place too”.

Nicole’s response remained simple - which was to be expected, it was how she was, Evelyn had learned. Though not for any sort of negative reason, nor any lessening respect. She did respect and care for Nicole a great deal, regardless of whether or not that was something typical of her. “I know - and yes, I suppose that we do. Though it is all different, and I sometimes do not see any point in focusing on such things.” She figured that she could leave things be for now, but if they talked again, she might poke a bit more - as she was rather curious but she knew that Nicole was someone who seemed to be a bit shy, at least when compared to Evelyn. She liked her too, and so she didn’t want to stress her out, at least not more than she already did. It was one thing to persuade Nicole to permit her to purchase a guitar, but this was something else entirely. “No, not especially, I simply did my own thing sometimes and so I think mostly being a child, but I also do not know quite what is typical for children, given that I grew up mostly on my own.” She took another sip of her water. She watched Nicole eye the salt and for a moment she wanted to ask her if she, too, was a mara. She didn’t, because maybe she wasn’t and was just curious about Evelyn’s constant movements. “Well that is good. You should come by sometime, and perhaps I will find nice beer and we can enjoy that.” She grinned. “I can make exceptions for those whose company I enjoy. Especially if it is at my place and not my bar, though I do not feel bad about giving you a more reasonable price than I do for most of my clients.” She grinned. “It is fancier, but I have always loved the fancier things in life.”

A half grin reached Nicole’s lips. She had to admire Evelyn’s uncomplicated mindset. She would’ve achieved a lot more had she moved on from all her traumas, she mused. “Not much of a dweller?” She wanted to make sure she was understanding her words right. She took another swig of her beer. “What’s your secret? Cause I’ve...I’ve tried telling myself— shit’s in the past and all that...” she frowned, unsure whether she wanted to go down that road or not. “Can’t get it through my skull, though” she shook her head, her fingers tracing the bottle before drinking again. She probably should’ve waited until the food had arrived, but the anxiety wanted her to keep her hands busy. Her expression turned serious as Evelyn expanded more on her childhood. “Typical children stuff, like...just— not behaving the way adults want cause...cause— they’re not wired that way yet. That’s pretty typical, I think” there was a lot of wrong in the way kids were treated, but she wasn’t sure how to put her thought into words. “As an older sister— I’m allowed to say, kids are really annoying, though” she quipped to lighten the mood, but didn’t feel right. Joking rarely did. “Don’t think there was anything wrong with you, trust me” she added calmly, offering a sympathetic smile. She entertained herself holding the beer by its neck and swinging it idly, an inch over the table. “Now that I’m...officially invited, yes. Booze is one way to lure me in” tasting actual decent alcohol did sound like something she’d enjoy. “Uh, isn’t— the bar your place?” She let out a chuckle, eyebrows furrowed. “C’mon, all water’s the same!” she knew it wasn’t true, but she was curious about what counted as fancy water. Looking past Evelyn’s shoulder, the waiter came into view. She wondered if the plates he was carrying belonged to them.  

“Not if it is something I wish to not dwell upon, yes.” Evelyn paused for a moment. “I mean - yes, you are correct. If something is unsavory, I do not wish to put my focus into it. I see little reason to.” Which she knew made her seem overly detached sometimes, but that was better than letting emotions overwhelm her completely. “Years of practice?” She shrugged. “I do not know, I think being alone much of my childhood allowed me to be alone with my thoughts, and I have never thought that getting too done up does anyone any good.” She took another sip of her water - she didn’t know why she kept telling Nicole so many things, but she also found that she didn’t always mind. “I guess so. It may be typical, but I have no proper experience with children outside of reading about them - I can imagine you might find them annoying.” She pressed her tongue against the roof of her mouth. “I do trust you, though I do not know. That remains to be seen, for some.” She gave an off-handed shrug. “Yes, please come, and I have found that alcohol is the way to get many people interested. I can promise my selection is some of the best you’ll find here.” She giggled, the sound causing her to blink a few times extra. Perhaps there was something particularly special about Nicole. “You may say that, but there is a difference, sometimes.” She turned to see what Nicole was looking at, the waiter making their way over with the plates of food, and Evelyn watched as they placed them on the table, though as they turned to go, their elbow knocked against the salt, causing it to fall onto the ground and break, salt spreading out in front of their booth. Shoot. The waiter hadn’t noticed and before Evelyn could call out they’d disappeared back into the kitchen. Evelyn eyed the salt warily, scooting further away from it. “What a mess, right?” She bit her lip. “I - I have - I am unsure if I am able to clean this up.”

Nicole managed to conceal her disappointment when Evelyn mentioned the years of practice. If it were up to her, she’d want to be done dwelling right in that moment. It was up to her, she reminded herself. Getting out of her head seemed to be a theme in her life lately. Like Evelyn, she had been alone with her own thoughts for too long, but it had the opposite effect. She let out a tired sigh at that, but didn’t say anything. From the first time they had met, it was obvious there was more to Evelyn than what she presented. The things she said always left her more curious. Confused too. She was about to ask what remained to be seen according to her, but it was all interrupted by the waiter bringing their plates. She was surprised at how quick the food had come. The conversation hadn’t been torture at all. At her alcohol comment, she raised an eyebrow. “Alright, I’m sure that’s not biased at all”. She smiled, eyeing her salad with amusement.Before she could say a word, things went awry.

She tried to reach for the saltshaker, fingertips barely missing the container. Despite her quick reflexes, it slipped from her fingers all the same, shattering on the floor. Nicole winced at the sound, her heart rate jumping immediately. She could sense the heads turning in their direction. “Fu—Shit!” shit, shit, shit. That’s why she had moved it in the first place. Shifting slightly, she checked under the table if the salt had extended to their shoes. Despite the initial scare, there was a minor relief when she saw her boots were clean. Had it fallen differently, she would’ve had to give Evelyn an extremely awkward explanation as to why she couldn’t move or get up. If only her chest could get the message that there was no imminent danger, though. “It’s— it’s fine. I’m...I’m sure we can get the—” she trailed off, eyes fixed on the salt. She tried to think for a moment, but everything around her was distracting her. Was it her own scared heart racing in her ears, or— she glanced at Evelyn then, noticing her shying away. She frowned. Was she worried about the mess? It was bad sure, but they’d get someone to clean, no? Her own worries slipped to the back of her mind, concerned eyes focusing on the woman. Maybe, like her, noises freaked Evelyn out too. “What’s… are you— did the sound freak you out?” It’s okay, it’s just—” she worried her bottom lip between her teeth. It wasn’t just salt. Not to her, at least. But why would Evelyn share the same worries? “You’re unsure if...what?”

Evelyn couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at Nicole’s comment, finding herself glad that Nicole was smiling - whether or not it was entirely due to her remark or something else she wasn’t entirely sure, but she did know that she liked when Nicole was happy - which was odd, given that they hardly knew one another but it was also an unavoidable fact. Before they could say anything more, the salt had broken and she looked curiously at Nicole, regarding her reaction with a certain level of confusion. Maybe she was just very into things being clean and orderly, which this was distinctly… not. Nicole was panicking though - although Evelyn couldn’t directly sense it, she knew enough about how people behaved when they panicked that she could understand what was going on. “A bit?” Evelyn pursed her lips. “I mean, I like music for ballet to be loud sometimes, but suddenly…” her voice trailed off. “A bit startling. I suppose.” Nicole was still asking her things and she knew that she needed to come up with a further explanation, and soon. “If I can clean this up.” She repeated. “I mean, I am plenty able to clean just … not this. I have sensitive skin and it sometimes acts up.” Even she knew that that sounded ridiculous. “Could you walk over and get the waiter, maybe?”

Nicole was hardly an expert on human emotions, but for a second their eyes met she believed her own fear was mirrored in Evelyn’s eyes. It made everything much more confusing. What were the odds of— no, she put that thought to rest when the woman confirmed she had been scared by the sound, that made sense. Glass breaking was never nice to hear. “It’s fine...it’s okay” she repeated, shaking her head. Evelyn didn’t look like something who did extreme emotions. Even startled, she seemed to try and keep it together. On the edge of the table, her hand opened and closed a few times while she hesitated over reaching out to comfort her or not. “Yeah, yes— it was kinda loud but…” her fingers dug into her palm as her hand clenched into a fist. The moment had passed. Her eyes landed on the food they had both clearly forgotten about. Didn’t matter, she wasn’t hungry anymore. “What, you’re allergic to... salt?” eyes narrowed, tilting her head. Her chest stirred again. There was a sensation inside her, heavy and uncomfortable in the pit of her stomach. And when her eyes met Evelyn's again, something in her told her she couldn’t trust her. She leaned back, attempting to put some distance between them. She clenched her jaw. Whatever she was feeling, it didn’t belong to her. She liked Evelyn, she was nice. She had to forget about that cold distrust building within her because she heard a question. “Can I— ” she licked her lips nervously, eyes back on the salt. She could, technically. But Evelyn would find it incredibly odd if she circled around the pile instead of just skipping through it like any normal person unaffected by salt would. “But you— you’re closer to the… you’re closer to the kitchen” she reasoned.

She’d never run into this sort of problem in public before. Of course, there had been the time - when she was little - when one of her cooks (sillyannoyingridiculousawful she remembered thinking, after the fact) had spilled some while making some sort of dish for a party. Evelyn had been sat up on a stool, eyes wide, hair spilling over her shoulders when it had happened and she’d hopped off, eager to find a way to help the cook clean up, finding herself unable to move. She hadn’t truly understood what was going on, except that she’d started screaming at such a high pitch that one of her nannies had come running - and her father too, eventually. He’d brushed away the salt and all of a sudden she’d been able to move again. She’d grown up a great deal since then, a great deal that meant she didn’t react in such an extreme way any more but it didn’t mean that she couldn’t feel her body tense up, at least slightly - at least as much as she’d found herself able to. “I - yes.” She blinked rapidly -- too much for what was normal, but all of this was a reminder of how very much not normal she was and she took in a breath, because Nicole was good and there was no way she was a hunter (though she’d been so very wrong about that before, hadn’t she?). She looked over to Nicole for a moment, watching the other woman push herself away. She didn’t know what she was planning and she could feel her own throat growing dry. “I - no. I cannot. It - you spend time outdoors,” she began, knowing that that excuse was certainly unimpressive. “I -” she began again, pulling her lower lip in. “I cannot go past it.” She finally settled on, not daring to look at Nicole. “I will not be able to move.” If she was out to hurt her, then she would already have figured it out. “It - I have been this way for as long as I can remember.” If Nicole was completely normal, then she might think Evelyn was losing her mind, but some small part of her hoped that Nicole would just understand it all without any undesirable consequences. If not - well, the small amount of time that they had known one another had been lovely.

“What?” Nicole had to laugh at the excuse Evelyn gave. It was nervous and out of place, but in any other moment she would’ve found the humor in it. Her laugh died in her throat only a moment later. The woman’s next words didn’t sound real. Her expression morphed from nervous to puzzled in a beat, before registering the meaning. She had never been too bright, but there was no other way to interpret what Evelyn was saying, right? Ghost, spirits, they couldn’t move through salt, she recalled an exorcist’s words a few months back. But Evelyn didn’t look like a ghost. Her heart was drumming so loudly in her ears it was hard to form coherent thoughts. There was so much she didn’t know. There was another explanation, right? Something she was missing. Instead, she was jumping to conclusions. Because— It couldn’t be. Was that the reason they had connected so quickly? Her chest heaved, eyebrows furrowed so tightly, she believed the lines would stay there forever. Just briefly, she allowed herself to consider— After years by herself, had she finally found someone like her? No. She was grasping at straws. There was nothing else to draw that conclusion from, except for the salt. That could mean anything. It seemed a waiter had walked past the table and spotted the mess, muttering something about cleaning it in a second, but she couldn’t tear her gaze away from the woman. The salt was forgotten. She didn’t care about it anymore. It was nothing. Just a catalyst for something much bigger. She leaned forward, eyes studying her intensely. She wasn’t sure what she was looking for, a clue, a tell, anything from the woman to would give away that they were more alike than she had initially thought.

“Evelyn,” Nicole called gently, despite how uncomfortable she felt using people’s names. Too personal. There was so much she wanted to ask, so many thoughts jumbled together. She was on the brink of possibly finding someone like her. The first one since— really? Was she gonna cry already? She let out a shaky breath. “I’m— what do you mean you can’t cross salt. Look— look at me,” she kept her voice as even as possible, but the words rushed out of her mouth, pushing and demanding. She didn’t want to sound angry — far from it, she only needed confirmation— but she doubted she had the nuance in her tone to not startle Evelyn. “You’re not...are you— are... are you—” she clenched her fist, frustrated. And when she thought she wouldn’t let it out, it came a whisper. Hopeful, curious, charged. “Are you not... human?”

Nicole was laughing and it didn’t seem to be right at Evelyn, at least not as far as she could tell. Except she wasn’t reacting to what Evelyn had said - at least not entirely, and she took a sip of water -- too much, filling up her mouth so much so that she could just focus on that and not whatever was going on with Nicole. Don’tbeahunterdon’tbea - she forced those thoughts out of her mind, because if she were one, Evelyn would have to find a way to deal with that but she didn’t believe that Nicole was. Her disposition was far too gentle, too nervous, too kind to be one. “What?” Evelyn’s eyes grew wide, jolted entirely out of her thoughts, though she found that she didn’t mind Nicole actually using her name - was this was it was like to have would-be friends? - she shook her head. “I - I -” Look at me. She did. Looked over to Nicole, avoiding direct eye contact but taking in her kind eyes, the way that her hair flowed over her shoulders. “I - no. Not human.” Her voice was barely above a whisper as she tried to process everything. Her tone had changed and Evelyn could feel her own expression shift to one that was far more calm than it had been just moments ago -- the waiter not returning the furthest thing from her mind right now. “Are - are you not, either?” Was she a mara? That could have explained while Evelyn found herself drawn to her - she knew that Nicole wasn’t a ghost - Evelyn knew that she couldn't see ghosts, no matter how much she might have wished to (but then again, with what Nadia and Deirdre had told her she wasn’t quite as sold on those any longer). That didn’t mean there wasn’t another species out there that had some of the same difficulties as Evelyn did. “I - can - I  - I am a mara.” She bit her lip, sighed gently. “I hope that is okay.” Her voice got quieter then, nails tapping on the side of her water glass.

Silence hung over them as Nicole took everything in. For once, she couldn’t tell whether it was uncomfortable or not. It was just silence, she had too much to process to care about social cues. She had rehearsed for the evening dozens of times in her mind. Prepared as much as one could. Went over every scenario she could create, from decent, to bad, to terrible to disaster. Evelyn revealing she was not human due to a broken salt shaker hadn’t been in the cards. It was a struggle to figure out how to take the revelation. They should’ve learned about one another with time, when they had trusted each other enough to say the words without fear. Not in a loud dinner because of a preventable accident. She wasn’t human, Evelyn’s words confirmed. Her heart skipped a beat. Excitement? Was she like her, then? She didn't get the chance to ask. “I— am I? Uh...I—” she held her breath at the question. That was new, had she been too obvious? It had always been easy to conceal her otherness from the world, pass for human, stifle the animal so it was nothing but a dull ache in her chest. She had never told anyone before. Then again, no one had asked so plainly either. She didn’t fancy her chances lying, not when she never had a good poker face. It all showed in her eyes, she had been told. And Evelyn didn't deserve lies anyway, not after her unprompted honesty. Maybe she’d read her mind, somehow. Maybe she wouldn’t have to say it.

The woman continued talking, and the pressure in Nicole’s chest was too heavy to ignore. Was it disappointment? A Mara. She didn’t know that word. They weren't the same, then. She was something else entirely. A different creature? She had new questions. “I don’t—I’m not sure what...what’s that”. Evelyn’s last words made her throat tighten. She swallowed hard against the knot, blinking away the tears she knew had to be gathering in her eyes already. Was it okay? How many times had the woman asked that and gotten a negative response? How many times would Nicole have to do that if she ever felt brave enough to be honest? Unsure on what to say, she settled for what she would’ve liked to hear instead. “That’s— that’s okay. Of course, why wouldn’t—” she mumbled, lingering on the hand tapping against the glass before her eyes flicked back up, bright and understanding. She wanted to reach out and offer some comfort, but her limbs didn’t receive the message. “You’re good, please don’t think— I’m not scared, or anything”.

She let the moment hang between them, quiet and though Evelyn liked to consider herself someone who knew how to use her words well, she felt at a loss for them - for just now, she hoped, though she was not entirely sure. She certainly knew that she hadn’t gone into this evening expecting for her friend - for whatever Nicole was - to find out that she wasn’t human. This was supposed to have just been a nice outing. Something normal for Nicole, something that made her feel comfortable. She couldn’t help but feel her mind flash back to the night with Alain, when something else entirely normal and supposedly benign had outed her as not-human. Thankfully, Nicole hadn’t left her yet and Evelyn breathed a small sigh of relief.

She was stammering though and Evelyn pressed her hands against her thighs for a moment, willing any calm energy to concentrate then and now - to focus and not freak out about whatever Nicole’s eventual response would be once she was able form complete sentences. She’d give her time though - that much she more than deserved, having something like this just suddenly dropped on her.  “I - it is okay. I do not expect you to know.” She pressed her thighs against one another, taking in another deep breath. “I - I feed on fear.” Her voice was so quiet now, she wondered if Nicole could hear. “I - I promise I do not feed on fr - those I - people I like. Trust. You. I have not and shall not ever do that. I am a living nightmare, I suppose. That is likely the best manner of phrasing.” She shook her head. “You do not have to be scared of me. I - I am not bad.” She didn’t know why she felt such a desperate need to insist upon this, rather than to just leave things as they were - to state it more assuredly. “Thank you. Not everyone responds well, is all.”

If Nicole thought further explanation would clear things out, she was wrong. Evelyn’s words didn't make sense. “What is—” What exactly did she mean by feeding? How could anyone feed on fear? Impossible. She eyed the untouched salad then, swallowing all the questions she wanted to ask. “What...” referring to herself as a living nightmare didn’t help either. Knowing she wouldn’t be able to understand, she focused instead on how the woman acted. Someone who was trying her best to stay calm, whose words weren’t exactly the most coherent. Too familiar. Despite learning she was a creature who fed on fear —whatever that meant—, Evelyn had never looked more human to her. Her breath grew shallow as her throat tightened. How could she judge her for something she didn’t ask for? It wasn’t right. They lived in a cruel world, scared, persecuted, ashamed —in her case— of what they were. None of it was right. It hurt to hear Evelyn defend her nature to her. She looked down to hide her face, tears were threatening to spill. Great, had she upgraded to crying for others too? Worst of all, she didn’t know the right thing to say. Evelyn was baring secrets and she didn’t have the emotional capacity to deal with it. There were more barriers between them than just the table.

“I’m not scared of you” Nicole repeated, voice low but firm. “I don’t understand…I don’t get anything of what you’re saying, but listen—” she licked her lips as her mind went blank. Where was she going with that? She was about to find out. “You’re—” she looked at Evelyn again, heat rising to her cheeks as it often did when she was ashamed of being honest. “For some reason, the first person I thought of when I needed to talk... was you,” the reason they were at the diner, the catalyst for all the events that led Evelyn to reveal she wasn't human. New information could change opinions, sure, but she was talking to the woman who bought a guitar for her the first hour they met. There was hardly anything that could change her mind about the kind of person she was. “And you came. You said yes! To meet a— You don’t think I already know you’re not bad?”. She swallowed, getting her thoughts together. She had a lot of questions. Some that could wait until Evelyn felt safe enough with her, but there was one she couldn’t keep inside. “What did you mean by...how can anyone feed on fear? that’s not—it’s...it’s not— you can’t eat that”.

Nicole was doing a number of false starts and reformulations and Evelyn wished, if for only just a moment, to take back everything that she’d said. It was too much, maybe. Even if Nicole wasn’t getting up and leaving it could just as easily be all too much to expect her to understand. As much as it frustrated Evelyn when people didn’t seem to understand, she also couldn’t expect them to - though she figured that was more her father’s words getting to her - they often stayed away but seemed to have a tendency to reappear in moments of doubt - they had, shortly after she’d broken up with Alain and she found that they were reappearing now, much to what would have been her dismay if she’d let it.

Instead, she refocused on Nicole, who seemed to have found her own voice again and Evelyn let out her breath. “Good.” She replied. “You needn’t be scared.” Since when am I supposed to sound like my tutors from when I was a child? She mused for a moment. Nicole’s next words made her bite her lip softly, gaze growing soft, and she wasn’t quite sure what to make of the stirring of emotions that ran through her body, then. She imagined for a moment that this must have been what it would have been like to have had a friend (that word was alright to use, she figured, because that was the only way she could describe Nicole) as a child, having someone who wanted to come and talk to her and not because of her money. At least, she figured as much, given how much Nicole seemed to actively push away her offers of aid for any number of things. “I know, but I just - some see those who are not human - and they push away, they think that this changes things, even though it was not. I know of plenty of proper humans who have done more harm than anyone who is not human has ever done.” Her hands found her glass of water again and she took in another sip, Nicole’s next question not a surprise. “It - well, it is the way my body processes things. Truly, there are times when I do not understand it myself, but I just know that I - well, I can touch someone and create nightmares and that provides sustenance. Perhaps it is like how plants can take in sunlight and change it to nutrients?” She shrugged. “I am able to eat normal food too, I just need to feed on nightmares in order to survive.” Another sip of water - “I can explain further, best as I can, if you would like.”

Nicole considered the woman’s words for a second. She didn’t agree with it, but it made sense. She understood Evelyn because she wasn’t human either. She could relate. But had she been human, with no knowledge of the strange creatures that walked among them, she would have reacted differently to the revelation. She would’ve thought the woman was crazy. “That’s pretty dumb of them” to push away someone because they were different. Though, if she was being understanding with Evelyn, who could be dangerous to others, why couldn’t ignorant humans receive the same treatment? Maybe with more knowledge, their minds could be changed. The moral dilemma gave her a headache. “But I guess— guess we can’t be too hard on—on...people ” she shot a quick glance at the woman, catching herself before she could say humans.

Nicole’s eyes narrowed at the way Evelyn explained feeding, the plant analogy helping to better visualize it. It sounded terrifying and fascinating at the same time. To have the ability to unleash that sort of terror at her fingertips. It brought on more questions, but it was hard to articulate any. More than anything, it helped her understand why Evelyn had tried to reassure her she wasn’t bad. How scary were those nightmares? Could people die because of the distress? After what felt like eternity for Nicole, the waiter rushed to their side, endless apologies spilling out of his mouth. She didn’t care, she understood. The diner was full and busy, the staff not big enough to cover it. She eyed him briefly as he swept the remains of glass and salt. Only then, the pressure in her chest eased, her heart slowing down. It had to be a relief for Evelyn as well. “Yes, please—” a shy smile pulled at the side of her face. She glanced down to Evelyn’s hands, following every unintentional move. “So just… you touch someone and— does it depend on…” she paused, grabbing her beer again. She toyed with it instead of drinking.“The worse the nightmare is, the— your meal is it….meatier? or—” she cringed at her wording. She had to sound stupid.  

“It may be dumb, but it also cannot be helped, sometimes.” She knew that was why, despite everything, she still felt some level of sympathy toward her father. He should have acted better with everything, but in the end he was just scared. Evelyn knew his position and title meant nearly everything to him. So much so that he stayed married to her mother even when he knew what she was. So much so that he kept aspects of his life - so many aspects - secret. Made Evelyn play human - because being anything other than perfectly normal was frowned upon. Nicole’s words were a breath of fresh air and it made things feel at least a little bit okay. She shrugged. “I guess not.” Try living with this for years, try finding out what you are and having answers and being shut down. Try being so alone in the middle of a party thrown just for you. Though she knew that there was no way that Nicole meant any of what she’d say in any sort of negative way, Evelyn couldn’t help the desperate and uncomfortable feelings that rolled throughout her whole body.

The waiter arrived finally and had Evelyn been younger, more prone to her snobbery (though she knew that she certainly held a good bit of that now, still), she would have scoffed, asked why they had taken so long. She didn’t, now. She offered them a small smile, as if to say It does not matter. As if to entirely avoid that something so simple could so easily render her helpless. Turn her into a child again, too-long hair and bright eyes, melting down in the house’s kitchen. At least this hadn’t turned into that. At least she was safe. “I have to concentrate.” She murmured, fingers brushing along the tabletop. “I - well, they are fulfilling on different levels. I am unsure entirely, but I do find a certain satisfaction in ones that are worse, I suppose. It creates more fear which is - well, that is the essence of what I need.” Thankfully nobody else was paying them any attention. “How about we get out of here? My bar is open whenever I please, and I can tell you more there.”

“That is…” Nicole should’ve been scared, right? A person was telling her she was capable of causing people nightmares at will in order to survive. That was unlike anything she had seen in town. She should’ve been scared, because she generally had common sense. But each new bit of information she learned, only made her more curious. Only made her wonder what else was out there, hiding in plain sight. “That’s kinda cool. Shit— I mean I wouldn’t like to be the...but—” she had believed Evelyn when she said she wasn’t bad, but that sort of power in different hands—it had to be dangerous. “Oh” she was surprised by Evelyn’s suggestion to leave. Neither of them had even touched the food yet, but she couldn’t blame the woman for wanting to get as far away as possible from the diner. She looked down at her plate as she pondered. They weren’t exactly in the right place to have that sort of personal conversation, she figured. As loud as the diner was, she had to assume there were others like her among them, with keen ears. Who might not take Evelyn’s revelation as well as she had. For their safety, it was probably the best idea to follow the woman’s suggestion.

Nicole found that she didn’t mind going either.  She was drained already from being surrounded by so many people. Trying to tune out noises and smells was a struggle. She still couldn’t figure out why she had chosen Al’s to meet in the first place. Bad idea from beginning to end. She glanced at the now clean floor. They were allowed to leave now, so why not? She tried to push down the guilt over the disastrous evening. She couldn’t have known. It wasn’t her fault. “Uh— sure. Yeah, that sounds— why not?” it took everything in her to fight the urge to call it a day, and just go home, avoiding more social interaction. Deep down is what she wanted, but what she wanted wasn’t always what she needed. “Let me just...” she bit the inside of her cheek, awkwardly waiting to be noticed by the waiter to ask for the check. “I could really use a drink— a real one, after all...this. So, let’s— let’s  go”.

[seizethecarpe]

Shift Happens || Nicole and Dave

Timing: Current Parties: @nicsalazar @seizethecarpe Summary: Dave and Nicole narrowly escape a mauling from a “wolf” Warnings: some gore/body horror

The sun was almost set, dim light filtering through dense trees as Nicole ventured deeper into unknown territory. The night was upon her and she hadn’t been able to spot a hiking trail for almost an hour. Getting lost in the woods wasn’t a common occurrence for her. Exploring the vast forest White Crest had to offer was only possible if she strayed from the established limits set for humans. But she always found her way back to civilization. There was no need to panic yet, despite the night threatening to fall soon. She’d find her way back, she always did. Her steps halted, an exasperated breath escaping her lips. She stood and listened to what the forest had to say. The ominous whispers of the wind, the light, scurrying steps of small creatures looking for shelter from night predators, the chirping of insects. And then, at the distance, the faint splash of a waterfall. Possibly a creek, somewhere. With that knowledge she carried on,  sharp eyes darting in the shadows. She was buried in the heart of the woods when she found unexpected company. Down the field and partly hidden, was a couple. Not the smartest of dating spots, she mused. Blush crept in her cheeks at the thought of interrupting and asking for directions, but before she could walk down to them, a branch cracked behind her. She held her breath at that, moving stealthily for cover. Her nostrils flared, confused at everything she was picking up. She had to be wrong. Why did it smell like the sea so deep in the woods? And there was something else, too— something she didn't have time to process, because the shiny eyes she caught across from where she stood sent her heart racing. It seemed she wasn’t the only one who had found the couple’s sanctuary.

Dave had found himself favouring the shadows the last few days. It was his impulse to sneak around, like it would be better to ambush everyone, even the old lady with dragon’s breath who worked at the convenience store. Already tolerant of the cold, Dave had begun to seek out more cold in even in the dead of winter, his shoulders bare as he walked through the forest. He could smell so much, the decaying wood under the trees, squirrels cache’s deep under the dirt, rotting flesh up in a tree from a pixie that had been hit by hail wrong. He smelled everything, but what he really wanted was to feel everything. Thick fog let him feel everything, but he still kept pressing his cheek against trees and walls because of how much he wanted to feel. He could smell folks nearby, and before he even understood why his mind began to consider how to flank the, like they were penguins for him to ambush. Dave had never even eaten a penguin, making everything weirder. Still, as he wandered closer and closer to the sound of water, he became acutely aware of others there. Dave wrinkled his nose as he looked at the couple. There was something weird about the smell of the man, but he didn’t know what. The man was possessive in his touches, nuzzling his face into her neck. Pursing his lips, Dave began to look for a way around them. He sure as hell didn’t want any part in that. 

In a beat, Nicole hid her body behind a tree, looking over her shoulder. The couple still were unaware of the company. She breathed in deeply, as quiet as possible. She could go around the trees and investigate what was on the other side. Confirm it was only an animal. Then, go down the clearing and ask for directions. Great plan, she decided, carefully stepping down from the edge and venturing in the trees again. Part of her begged her to turn the other way, find another path, do the sensible thing for once. She was possibly walking straight into danger with nothing but a bottle of water and some snacks in her backpack. Her eyes fixed on a passing shadow at the distance, heart jumping to her throat. And for a brief second her control slipped. Amber eyes flashed and her vision was nitid in the dark, making out what her brain processed as a shoulder. Eyes shot to the ground, until she was sure her vision returned to normal. She kept her head down, afraid she might have scared whatever she was chasing. Her steps were cautious as she continued to approach, quietly stalking, waiting to be perfectly sure she had the upper hand. Then, she did something equally stupid and brave. “I...I can hear you” despite the statement, her tone was laced with uncertainty. Could be an animal. More often than not, it was the case. It didn't explain the shadow, or the bare shoulder she believed she had seen. She was being paranoid. The forest was known for its deceptive shapes. “I’m not— I’m not dangerous” she spoke aimlessly, knowing it was unlikely to have the effect she wanted.

There was the smell of some kind of cat or fox or something that Dave picked up as she watched the couple, his cheek still pressed against rough bark even though it served little purpose for working out more about them. He tilted his head curiously, trying to work out what he was picking up on, whether it was a local predator or just the scent of their tabby’s fur clinging to their clothes. But he realised after a moment that it wasn’t them, that it was something bigger and far closer, but it was downwind from him, he’d caught it too late, so as he turned he heard a human voice. Dave rubbed his face in frustration, straightening up because he knew it looked like he’d been trying to sneak around. Well, he had been, but that was just because-! Dave didn’t know why he was doing it. “Well, I can barely hear you, so come out where I can see you,” Dave replied eventually, looking around. “Nor am I.” Having turned his attention away from the couple, he heard the crack of twigs as one of them began to move, but not the accompanying noise of complaint. 

Nicole waited, her jaw set until the other voice came. Her judgement wasn’t the best, but at least the voice did not twist her stomach with dread. Small victories. Now what? She didn’t like it when she had to share space with other hikers, but she exhaled sharply at the request, navigating through bushes and trees until she reached the source of the voice. She wasn’t wrong, it had been a shoulder she had spotted before. And while she had more pressing questions to ask, they took the backseat to judge his appearance instead. “Jesus, aren’t you fucking cold?”. She shook her head, hoping to gain back some focus, but in the time she looked away from the couple, something went down. A scream filled the air, and the stranger in front of her was forgotten. Her head whipped down to the field. The screams continued, growing desperate, pleading. The couple was gone. It was just a woman, and a massive dark figure hovering over her. “What…” An animal? It didn’t look like a bear, and she doubted she could find any other beast as big as that in the forest.  Unless— the hair on the back of her neck stood. It was all too much to process in two seconds. “What the...fuck is—” her words died, eyes widening in horror.  

Dave frowned at her question, before looking down at his exposed arms and calves before shrugging with a wry smile. “Cold doesn’t bother me,” he replied, his words cut off by the scream behind him. He immediately tensed, crouching behind the tree as he smelled thick blood in the air, clogging up his nose. For a brief second, he saw the man staring at the woman in guilt, flesh dangling between his  human teeth. The next, he saw a terrifying beast, It’s jaw cracking as it extended and narrowed into a maw. If Dave had had any intentions to try and save the woman they quickly faded as he realised that they weren’t dealing with any monster but a werewolf. His breath caught in his throat. He knew he had his foolhardy moments, but Dave didn’t fuck with werewolves, not ever. Considering their impressive hearing and sense of smell Dave suspected that the werewolf knew where they were already but for right now it was distracted, tearing the woman apart. If he couldn’t do anything to intervene, then Dave could at least give her the dignity of not looking away. The moment her scream ended was the loudest, but the wolf did not stop tearing into her. “We’ve got to go,” he growled at Nicole. “Now.”

 Nicole closed her eyes, hoping that would erase the image etched in her brain. The blood, the screams, the horrifying beast that shouldn’t be real. She was about to be sick and the stench under her nose didn’t help. She knew werewolves existed. She heard countless stories from other rangers. It was likely she had been near some at any point in the woods, evading them by sheer luck. She knew of them, but nothing had prepared her for the viciousness of their behavior. She vaguely registered the stranger speaking to her, but it took seconds for the words to finally find its meaning. She blinked her tear filled eyes, willing herself to turn away from the gory scene. The words rushed out of her mouth, all jumbled together. “Wha— what do you mean...what do you mean go, she’s—” she stepped forward, but hesitated to jump to the clearing. Why was he talking about leaving, when there was a person dying in their proximity. Looking back to her didn’t help. Anger burned in her chest. Were they supposed to let that beast tear into her like she was nothing? Like some meaningless chew toy? No, she was somebody. Someone had to be waiting for her to come home. People who loved her. She didn't deserve to be ravaged by a monster to never be found again. She froze on the spot, the adrenaline clouding her thoughts. “N-No. We— I have...there’s gotta be a way to stop that thing”. 

“Ain’t nothing we can do for her,” Dave said harshly, shifting the weight on his injured leg. “Look at me, look at me. Neither of us have a rifle with us, neither of us are equipped. Animals like that, we can’t stop them.” His eyes slid past her to the wolf tearing through the woman’s thigh, her leg jolting and jerking about as the tendons clung futilely to her bones. Skin hung off the back of the looming werewolf, dripping blood down its fur. “We gotta go.” Pointedly, he began moving himself, gesturing pointedly for her to follow. 

She knew —of course— that his words were true. Nicole couldn’t fool herself. The woman had stopped screaming, and the only sounds coming from the field belonged to the wolf. She was gone. Frustration brought tears to her eyes, and she stubbornly refused to follow the man’s command.  He could go if he pleased. She had to wonder why she was still considering running down and trying to stop it. Stop what? she’d only end up being the second course. His words dawned on her. Animals. Beasts. Monsters. That’s what the werewolf was. What she was too, if she were to lose control. She flinched, but forced herself to watch the beast tear the woman’s leg off. Had she done that too, when the jaguar took over? Did she have bodies count too? She clenched her jaw, angry eyes fixing on the stranger. Fuck off.  An unfamiliar urge to take on him burned in her chest. But logic prevailed, and she relented from the edge of the trees. If they were lucky, the wolf was still too busy with his meal to hear her shuffling between branches. “You’re too fucking calm— too fucking calm... for someone who just watched a person get fucking—” she shook her head, furiously wiping the tear rolling down her cheek.

Once she started moving, Dave didn’t fuck around, hurriedly leading them both through the thicket. Fortunately in winter there wasn’t quite so much greenery obscuring the forest floor, following a river route, but the wet, rotten leaves left much to be desired underfoot. He saw her tears and didn’t care, couldn’t care, until he couldn’t smell blood and bone and canine in the air. She still smelled like the dozen or so cats she must have in her home, though. “I ain’t calm,” he growled, turning back on her, suddenly as angry at her as he was at the fucking nerve of the kind of werewolf that delighted in tearing people apart. Dave’s lips curled into a sneer, unable to shake the image of her skin dangling in the man’s mouth before he’d twisted into his other form. “You don’t get to accuse me of anything when you were prepared to stand there and get eaten!” He breathed in deeply, catching the hint of wolf on the wind, and gestured sharply for them to keep moving. 

Nicole dragged her feet behind him, letting out shaky breaths through her mouth. An attempt to control the urge to cry harder. She only grew more frustrated when the branches kept poking at her clothes and hair as they moved closer to safety. Her reaction as he turned was swift. She stepped back out of reach, hands rising. Part apology, part defense. She swallowed the angry reply, but kept her hardened gaze on him. She would never win a verbal fight. Not without bursting into tears in the process. And would that even count as a win? She had already embarrassed herself enough. And he wasn’t wrong. Guilt sat in the pit of her stomach. She had done fuck all to help the woman. Just yell that she needed help. What good did that do? She was thankful he continued to move. The scent of the beast grew stronger, and judging the by its paws against the grass, it was headed in same direction as them. “It’s coming this way” she warned softly, eyes darting around searching for a solution. Hiding from a werewolf wouldn’t work. Taking a detour maybe, if he hadn’t sniffed them yet. Climbing? She could, but was unsure on her companion. “Any good at running?” she regretted it as soon as it left her mouth, glancing at his injured leg.

  They’d followed a nearby river for as they trudged on, Dave kicking the thicket underneat out of the way as he impatiently lead Nicole through. Recent snowfall and freezes meant the river was threatening to flood its banks. The rushing of the river might just be enough to hide the sound of her sniffling as they trudged along. But he wasn’t angry at her, not even as she glared at him. Considering everything, she was doing a damn fine job of keeping herself together. Dave smelled it, thick wolf fur soaked with blood. It had delighted in its first meal, and it was plunging through the forest, still uncertain on its legs with a strange gate, searching for them. “Shit, shit.” He looked at Nicole, caught her question, and nodded, he’d deal with his pain later. “When need’s must,” Dave said, but as the gangling monstrosity thundered through the trees before them, skin dangling off its back, sinew dripping blood from between its teeth, he knew they would not be fast enough. Dave looked once at Nicole, once at the river, slung his arm around her middle, and plunged backwards into the icy river, letting the water sweep them away as he held her head above the freezing current. 

 They had agreed to run, and though Nicole couldn’t form any words, only managing a nod to confirm they were on the same page. Until the wolf surged among the trees. Too fast to even sense it. Although delayed, the real threat of the beast made her survival instincts finally kick in. She had to run, leave the injured behind. Maybe the man would even agree, as he’d wanted to do that with the first victim. It only remained a passing thought, as one moment later an arm wrapped around her and pulled her into the river.  It seemed to happen in slow motion, sinking in the water.  But it still didn’t prepare her for the cold shock response. She gasped sharply, limbs kicking in a panicked state. Something was keeping her head afloat so she wouldn't take water into her lungs. Someone, she vaguely registered. She kept fighting to release herself from the hold, her brain unable to process what was happening. She began to hyperventilate when the spasm in her leg sent another wave of panic. She was going to drown. With her heart at her throat, it was all she could think of. She had to relax, then. She knew this. She was good in water. She had to let the river take them. It was that or drowning. It felt like ages until the shock passed and she stopped resisting, the current carrying them river down, out of the wolf’s grasp. When the land seemed to narrow enough, she held onto anything she could find to push herself out of the water. 

Dave let her go as they reached a river bank, heaving himself out of the water with practiced ease before offering his hand for her. Despite the frigid temperatures, he didn’t even have a shiver yet, but he was worried about her. Twice fold, considering the number of bruises she’d managed to give him while they were in the river. Dave rubbed one such bruise on his jaw ruefully, looking her over with concern. “Sorry ‘bout that, didn’t see we had much of a choice. Pretty damn sure we lost it. God help us if we didn’t. You alright?”

  Refusing his helpful hand, Nicole dug into wet soil and rocks to get out of the water. She scrambled to her knees first, only to lie on her back soon after it was clear she didn’t have energy left to hold herself up. She panted, shivers rippling through her body. Teeth clattering, she held her backpack close to her chest, weakly patting her arms to create any sense of warmth. “F-fu...fuck” she let out a long, shaky groan. Her eyelids were heavy. The man’s voice came, and she craned her neck searching for him. She clenched her jaw, exhaling sharply through her nose. She couldn’t stop shaking, but breathing wasn’t so painful anymore. She reckoned she was only alive by the sheer determination to fight him once they made it to land. A fire that burned through the icy current. His words, however, subdued her almost instantly. She was too tired. A warning would’ve been nice, sure. But he acted quickly and led them to safety. If she had energy to feel, she would’ve been thankful. “Don— N-no” she tilted her head to the side, that was as much as a negative as she could offer. Her body jolted again, and she rolled to her side. Why didn’t he look terrible? It was like he took a dip at the beach. Not a shiver, not even a— “Wh- happ’n…” eyes fixed on his bruise, confused. “You ‘kay?” 

“You hit me,” Dave replied wrily, looking at her on the ground critically. “Jesus, girl, you’re freezing.” But he was just as soaked as she was, his clothes wouldn’t help warm her up. “C’mon, let’s get going. Not letting you catch your death like this.” She was still shivering, which was good, but they’d need to move fast. Hell, they were a ways from his van, but maybe there was somewhere else nearby that he could help her get warm. “Need to move fast, alright? Can you do that or do I gotta call someone out here?” If it was the latter, that would be an issue. He didn’t not know where they were, but like hell could he give directions over the phone easily. He bent over to help her to her feet, his hands unusually warm. “Are you hurt?”

“Oh” The slight twitch in her eyebrows was the only clear sign of surprise in Nicole’s face. She didn’t apologize. He was ready to keep going, and she let out a grunt. How was he still in good shape? Maybe he made the habit out of jumping into cold water. He looked too adjusted to the temperature even before that. “N-no. No” at the suggestion, she managed to move her head with more energy. She’d rather be dead than call for help. Just like that, she began to warm up. “I can” she swallowed, a shiver running down her spine. She sat up. Taking his hand to help herself up, she shook her head. Trying to save energy by talking as less as possible “F-fine...just—” freezing. They could walk until they hit the road, then she could call an uber. Decent plan. She took a couple tentative steps, gauging the state she was in. Okay enough. She removed her jacket, letting more water drip. In the meantime, she took in the surrounding scents and sounds to orient herself. She dragged her feet down the path she believed would lead them to the road. “How...are you fine?” she huffed, shuddering again. It wasn’t the most pressing issue, but she couldn’t let it go.

“Alright,” Dave replied, not one to argue with someone so determined to be alright. “I’m a sailor, taken plenty of tips out of the boat. Guess I’ve built a resistance to it. Not as much practice getting away from wolves.” Dave waved his hand, walking a little unsteadily, his leg stinging like a jellyfish cloud. He pulled his phone out of his pocket, forever grateful he’d invested in such a water tight cover. “Thank fuck,” he said soon as he smelled tarmac and rubber burn - a surefire indication they were near a road. “We’re gonna have to call the police or something to let them know about that feral beast attacking that couple. I know it must’a been scary to see that.”

“Guess that explains the—” Nicole stopped, as her foot almost got caught on a protruding tree root. He did smell so much like the sea. At least that part of the puzzle was solved. She forgot where she was heading with that sentence, distracted by the mention of wolves. In the commotion and the shock, she didn’t stop to think about how fast he was to figure they were in the presence of a werewolf. She shot him a quick glance, debating her next words. It was always strange to meet people who knew of the supernatural but being unable to discuss it. Because he knew didn’t he? He did. Was he one of them too? She bit her tongue, it wasn’t the time. “Sure”. What were the police going to do about a beast like that? Just serve as the next meals. But she kept her mouth shut, unsure if she kept shaking her head because she didn’t agree with him or due to the cold. “Right” she nodded, and it took all her mental strength to not blow up over his lack of reaction again. He might as well be the reason she lived to tell the tale, she reminded herself. “More used to finding bodies already dead in the woods than—” her throat tightened again. She wasn’t sure she’d get the image off her mind any time soon. Better to move on from the topic. “Can hear the road close, no?” 

 “Sure isn’t the kind of thing you wanna get used to,” Dave agreed quietly, almost as an apology for how calm he’d been before, unflinching at the sight of the woman’s brutal demise. “Don’t go feeling guilty now, there was nothing you could have done for her, alright?” He wasn’t sure any of that was helping, he’d never been all too good at the comforting thing, but it needed saying, He nodded at her question, hopping over a fallen log and pushing through a bushy thicket and onto the main road.

 “Yeah. If you call a car, I’ll stay with you until it gets here. Wouldn’t want that animal coming back for you without back up.” In the meantime, he’d debate back and forth, over and over, like he had for much of his life, whether this was the kind of wolf it was better to call a hunter on, or whether it was better to leave well enough alone. 

 Looking over at Nicole shivering, Dave had no doubt he knew what her answer would be. 

 No. It wasn’t. But if Nicole had to choose between finding someone already dead or watching them die, the choice couldn’t be easier. “Guess it happens when you live here”. As usual, curiosity struck in the worst moment, wondering if the man had seen it happen before. It explained his lack of reaction. While his words rang true, it didn’t ease the guilt. The pressure extending from her stomach to her chest was hard to ignore. It wasn’t just her inability to take action, but she couldn’t wrap her brain around other reasons yet. Maybe she was upset because she couldn’t get the image of the beast tearing into a human off her head. Maybe she was just hungry and tired. She thought of the human within the beast, and the breathing she had managed to steady turned erratic again. It worked as a reminder that she could never lose control over herself and risk the same thing happening. 

 It didn’t look like either of them were particularly good at conversations, but for once Nicole preferred that way. She didn’t think she would remember much of the night besides the wolf and the icy river anyway. When the car arrived, she glanced at him one last time. If anything, to remember his face. The ‘thank you’ was left unsaid. She wondered briefly what would happen to him, but the most pressing thoughts were those of her warm bed. She did wish for him to find his way home safely, at least. 

[malum-somnium]

Charmed, I’m Sure || Kevin & Her Dreamers

Timing: Recent Location: The Cave of Voices Participants: @zahneundklauen, @nicsalazar, @drqueenieking, and Kevin Summary: The dreamers reunite at the cave to discuss what happened. Kevin offers answers and asks for a favor. 

Days had passed in a blur since the last time Nicole stood outside the cave. The month gone had not provided any clarity on the events that transpired that night. All she had was a hazy memory and the sleepwalking issues to show for. The only proof it had all been real. As she slipped for a third time climbing the rocks to reach the cave, part of her wished she was still asleep. When the doctor had proposed for all three to meet she had been reluctant. It seemed pointless. She didn’t expect a real answer unless they managed to find Kevin. Her stomach twisted into a nervous knot that tightened at the uncertainty of what they would find out. She spotted the other two close to the entrance, picking up her pace to meet them. She couldn’t remember their faces, despite the time they had spent together. She didn’t expect them to remember her either. How odd it felt, to be connected by something yet not knowing anything about the other. She raised an eyebrow in acknowledgement, biting the inside of her cheek. Her eyes averted to the inside of the cave, which appeared flooded, unlike the last time. “This feels— it’s bizarre” her hands were deep in her jacket’s pockets, expecting someone else to take the lead. “Guess you’re Queenie and…” was it Alcher? No. She didn’t want to be called that. “Ada?”

Despite being in a state of unconsciousness, Queenie was surprised to learn that she could easily find the cave again. Being back at the entrance didn’t feel familiar in the slightest. Her memory had only started after she had been inside the cave and yet somehow she had been able to retrace her steps here as if she had strolled past the place yesterday. The whole thing should be increasingly concerning, and it certainly raised plenty of alarms. However, Queenie was so stubbornly fixated on gaining answers so she could make sense of the entire situation that she shoved aside any worries and instead focused on the facts. She had woken up with two others in a state of trance. A fourth person was there and had them complete odd tasks. After that they went home. It wasn’t much to go on, yet with the small lead she did have, the three had found each other and made their way back to the cave it had all happened at. That must mean something. “Yes, that’s me. So you’re Nicole and Ada then? Nice to meet you in person, or officially meet you I suppose. Before we head in, anybody remember anything post our online conversation that we should know?”

Facing the unknown was a part of life Alcher was not entirely prepared for. Her father had taught her how to prepare for any situation, but it seemed his knowledge of what could possibly happen didn’t extend to things like sleepwalking to a cave and resurrecting a faceless figure. And so, Alcher found she needed to go and figure this out on her own, and with a little help from the two others who had shared this experience. When she made it to the cave, Queenie had already been there, and they’d stood for a moment in silence until Nicole, the third, had shown up. Nicole smelled of something distinct that Alcher could not entirely place. But she knew the scent, and she knew her memory would provide her the answer soon enough. For now, they would focus on this. “I cannot say that I remember anything, whenever I try to talk to other people about what happened, I find the memory has...vanished,” she answered, glancing between the two.

“That’s my— yeah…” Nicole nodded in confirmation, relieved once the doctor spoke. Was it nice to meet them? The verdict was still out on that one. Out of the two, she was wary of the doctor's reaction if they were to find the truth. She seemed in denial when they had talked. She was bound to be shocked. When the other woman began to speak, Nicole’s eyes finally landed on her. Her double take lacked any subtlety. There was a scent, something not human. She had to be mistaken, right? Maybe it was the wind, carrying that from the beach. Or— She shook her head, concentrating. She couldn’t ask —not that she ever would have— there were more pressing matters at hands. She rolled back her shoulders to ease some tension, eyebrows knit together as she tried to tune her out. Eyes trained on the ground, she started thinking. Her memory had always been terrible, but now she had the added mental fog that prevented her from talking to others about that night. “I uh— I remember that person,” her name escaped her in that moment, “she was— she was nice, I think...or sounded it at least” nice was a strange way of describing someone who had manipulated them while unconscious. “We all came with...we were carrying shit, no?” she figured connecting every version of the story was a good place to start. They could recreate some of those actions when they entered the cave. 

“Funny, I’ve also had trouble remembering the details of that night. And yet when I spoke with you I could remember things a bit more clearly.” Queenie admitted the odd coincidence, though she wasn’t willing to acknowledge that it meant anything. It was true that people tended to remember things better in familiar environments to the one they experienced things in. Perhaps that had simply been the case while talking with Nicole and Ada. That seemed more likely than selective amnesia or something like that. “Kevin. That was the name.” Queenie had never been able to recall the name until talking with Ada. Even now, when she considered discussing the event with her husband the memories seemed to fog up again. That was concerning for obvious reasons. “Sure, if you consider guiding us through some weird cult ritual in a cave to be nice. I don’t.” Though Queenie vaguely remembered thinking the opposite that night. As far as Queenie had been concerned, she would have done anything to help Kevin achieve her goal that night. “Yes. I used the pen to… write nonsense on the three of us.”

“Kevin,” Alcher repeated, tilting her head as she said the name. It was all so clear now-- Kevin, and the sleepwalking, and the lightbulbs. They’d all come here with something different each and handed them to Kevin, who had been so happy, so excited for them to be there. To help her. Alcher stepped forward, the darkness of the cave blacking out her vision. But she didn’t need it. The other two were still talking things through, but Alcher trudged along, following the familiar scent. “This way,” she pointed, looking back over her shoulder at the other two, waiting for them to follow but not instructing them quite yet. She had patience, but she did have more curiosity. More of a need to know what had really happened that night and why they had left with marks upon them. Alcher rubbed the spot on her ribs where she’d been written upon. “Heart,” she answered, the word suddenly coming to her, “you wrote the word Heart on me. I...think.”

No, a cave ritual didn’t sound nice. Nicole shook her head, regretting her initial words. Kevin had been persuasive, if anything. They hadn’t had any chance but to do as told. There wasn’t any reason to suspect anything but good intentions. Kevin. As the other women repeated the name, she realized how familiar it was. That was it. Kevin had been so proud of them, she remembered.  Surprised to see Ada separate herself from them, her eyes followed. A moment later she called out, knowing where to go. After a curious glance at the doctor, she nudged ahead. Carefully, she walked inside. She offered her hand to Queenie, if she needed to steady herself before stepping into the large puddle at the entrance. Though tempting, she didn’t try to adjust her vision to the cave’s darkness. Her heart was at her throat. “Not sure what you wrote...but it was on my forehead”. If ‘heart’ was written on Ada’s ribs, maybe hers followed the same logic. “Something mind related, maybe” eventually she caught up with Ada. “Still doesn’t explain— the ritual. Don’t know about you...but I’ve never heard or done anything like it”.

Though nothing seemed familiar at the time, Ada reminding Queenie of the word heart jump started the memory. She had written something different for each of the three, Queenie’s own arms had said hands. What had possessed Queenie to write those things on people she hardly knew? Nothing about that night made sense. She wanted answers. But she was concerned that coming back to this cave was just going to leave her more confused than ever. Slowly making their way into the cave, Queenie accepted Nicole’s hand to climb through the area. “Can’t say I’ve ever been part of any ritual. Certainly not willingly.” That night in the cave had been no different, correct? Even if Queenie had been going along with Kevin’s commands, they still hadn’t been willing. Queenie in a normal state of mind would never entertain anything crazy like that. “I’m still suggesting that we were hypnotized or perhaps drugged in some way. Otherwise, nothing about this makes any sense.” As the three ventured further into the cave, Queenie was growing less and less patient, “What are the chances that we will even run into this Kevin person anyways? I hope we are not just wasting our time here.”

The cave had visitors once more, her dreamers had returned. Kevin could feel them, moving about, asking such wonderful questions. The ritual had been a success, but it was only one of many more to come. Her powers were returning, slowly, but surely. She rose from where she had been resting, feet quiet as they carried her into one of the larger caverns. “I’m here, my darlings,” she called. A flick of her hand to ease their way, to make the rocks less slick. It wouldn’t do for any harm to befall her dreamers. They must be protected. Another motion of her wrist and the cavern was filled with a soft, blue light. She would have to see their lovely faces properly. “You’ve come back to me. It is so lovely to see you once more. What can I do for you, my dears? You have already done so very much for me.” 

The voice reached Alcher’s ears before it reached her nose, which was odd for her. Very odd. Her sense of smell was greater than her hearing, than her eyesight-- and yet no scent filled the cave. But as sure as her ears could pick up the sound of Kevin’s voice, her eyes finally focused enough to lay on her form. The other two suddenly didn’t matter anymore, and Alcher moved swiftly over the rocks towards her, as if drawn in. “What-- what are you?” she asked automatically when Kevin opened the floor for them. Her golden eyes drank in the sight of her, trying to remember what she’d looked like the night they’d first found her and why she seemed so different now. “Why did you bring us here that night?”

Nicole let Queenie theorize as much as she wanted, even though she didn’t make any sense. She didn’t think the doctor was prepared to hear any supernatural possibility. Saying Kevin’s name seemed to have an immediate effect inside the cave, the ground turning easier to step in. “Fuck” came out in a hiss. She had not expected to hear that voice again. She breathed out, shuddering as Kevin announced her presence. On a second thought, she was fine not getting answers. She wanted out. Instead, she remained rooted to the spot, because her desires and her actions could never agree on something. Ada seemed to have her questions ready. She had to admire her decisiveness. On the other hand, her thoughts were all jumbled together. Only one thing stood out for her. She had to know if they had been randomly selected, or if there was something else, something deeper.  “Why...” she peeked behind the other woman’s figure, voice smaller. “Why did you choose us?” 

A light from inside the cave caught the three’s attention quickly. Despite all logic stating otherwise, the person that Queenie and the others were searching for was inside this cave. How long had they been here? The place hardly seemed sustainable for somebody to live in. Queenie had been hoping to run into this Kevin figure again, and yet the moment Kevin spoke and announced themselves, Queenie was left with even more questions. The two were quick to launch into questions. What are you? Queenie’s eyes darted toward Ada with an incredulous look flashing across her face. What sort of question was that? Both Ada and Nicole seemed dead set on this person standing in front of them being some type of supernatural, mythological figure with mind control powers or something equally outrageous. Instead, Queenie saw someone with an unassuming disposition and even more boring name taking advantage of the creepiness of the cave and her lowlighting to make this exchange seem more ominous than it needed to be. “I want to know how you managed to get the three of us here in the first place.” She wasn’t willing to accept that Kevin had somehow been responsible for the sleepwalking. But even that was too coincidental for Queenie to ignore completely.

So many questions, so many lovely questions. What thoughtful dreamers they were, so curious, so considerate. Kevin motioned them forward as she gracefully sank to the floor of the cave, sitting and stretching out her legs. “Join me, won’t you, my loves? I will tell you all you wish to know,” she said, with an open, earnest smile. “I am not so strange, my dear. I am… what you would call a caster, or I once was. I am something more now, though even I cannot say just what. Your question, Alcher, and yours, Nicole are one and the same. I could feel your dreams, your wandering minds calling to me. Each of you is a lovely little spark, so bright. I wished to see the light of you so close. And my darlings, believe me, you glow.” Her kind eyes turned to Queenie. Belief was difficult, Kevin knew that well, and faith was more complicated still. “I’ve always had a talent for it, darling, pulling at dreams. I touch something in there and it draws the dreamers to me. It was once a spell, but now it is easier than keeping my eyes open. Now, I have answered your questions, may I ask something of you, my loves?”

Tentatively, Alcher moved forward at Kevin’s request. Somehow, she knew not to fear her. Knew that Kevin would never harm her, or the others. It was an inherent instinct she supposed wasn’t part of the other two. They were both skeptical and wary, and though Alcher took note of Nicole hiding behind her, she did not acknowledge it yet. As she moved, she turned back to the younger woman and held out her hand. “She won’t hurt us,” she said, urging Nicole to join her-- and Kevin-- at the center and sit. She listened intently to Kevin’s answer. A spellcaster. Or, someone who used to be. Someone who was something more now. Alcher didn’t know much about magic, but she understood enough to know that whatever Kevin was now, it was far beyond human. She was one of them. At the request to ask something of them, Alcher glanced between the other two. “My answer is yes, but only if the other two agree,” she stated firmly.  

The pet name made her Nicole’s skin crawl. She was trying not to judge her unconscious self too hard, but how did Kevin make her feel at ease that night? She didn’t move, despite the invitation to join her. Despite Alcher’s assurance that it would be okay. She seemed more prepared than the rest. Apprehensive eyes fixed on her hand, her gut telling her to follow the woman. Instead, she shook her head. She wasn’t sure what a caster was, and it didn’t matter much to her, but she let Alcher satisfy her curiosity. “I haven’t called anyone” she scoffed, that didn’t answer her question fully. Why them? Why not other little sparks or whatever bullshit she was spewing. It wouldn’t mean much, but at least she could find some comfort if it was only them who could have fulfilled the tasks. That they didn’t risk their lives arbitrarily. She couldn’t bother with the rest. The dream pulling, it was all insane. She glanced tentatively at Queenie, who had to be struggling even harder to comprehend all of it. For once she thought she might be the voice of the reason. Alcher was expecting all of them to agree to more nonsense. “How do we know— how can we trust you— you kinda, you crossed a line already”. Did she really think one answer would be enough?

Perfect, so this Kevin person wasn’t a mastermind manipulating the three of them, Kevin was simply psychotic. A caster. Queenie had no idea what that was supposed to mean, but the casual mention was enough to elicit a small chuckle from Queenie. This had all been a coincidence. A wildly unrealistic but technically plausible coincidence. This person just happened to be around the cave and noticed the three sleepwalking. It had to be something like that. The laugh morphed into a scowl as she remembered that they had willingly come back to this cave just to be dicked around by Kevin again. But they were here, and Queenie was genuinely curious to see just how far they planned on taking this. And just how dumb her two colleagues were. “I’ll admit I’m curious though,” Queenie interjected, adding onto Nicole’s statement. Kevin had crossed a line. But she had peaked their interest, “I’d like to hear the question, personally.”

Sweet Alcher, so understanding. The other two were more distant, Kevin could feel it even now. That was alright. Not everyone took to it easily, they weren’t yet ready to see the truth, to truly wake. Still trapped in their own little dreams. She looked to Nicole, her smile soft. “My apologies, I meant no harm. I am unused to the way of things. I was asleep for so very long, it seems the world went right on spinning without me. But I mean you no harm, dear. If you do as I ask, I will grant whatever favor you wish in turn. Would that be a fair exchange?” She had that power, or she would, once she found what was hers, once her lovely dreamers returned it to her. “I’ve lost something, an amulet. It is very precious to me. I believe it is here, somewhere in this town. If you find it for me, I will give you anything you wish.”

Nicole’s hesitance felt strange to Alcher. She could tell Nicole was something beyond human, unlike the strange doctor who had written upon her ribs. Alcher’s hand went up to the spot where she had drawn upon her and she recalled the strange warmth it brought her. Why were the other two so opposed to this? Of course they had been chosen, they were all special. Alcher just hadn’t figured out how. She looked back at Kevin, giving a short nod. “Sounds fair to me,” she answered, frowning slightly. She looked back over at Nicole. “And what, may I ask, has she done to garner your distrust? Kevin has never hurt us, and she’s willingly answered our questions. What reason do we have to fear her?”

Queenie voicing her curiosity made her stomach twist. If the doctor was on board, then that didn’t leave her with a lot of options. Was she about to be peer pressured into doing some strange creature’s bidding again? Definitely. Nicole listened then, as Kevin explained her actions. Being asleep for long, the world spinning without her. Her throat felt heavy. Fuck it, why did that resonate with her? “I don’t… I don’t want anything. Whatever” she said weakly, turning her back to them to gather her thoughts. She hadn’t expected to be addressed by Alcher. The question was uncomfortable. Being put on the spot sent her heart racing. “The— she…” she huffed, pointing at Kevin. Were they not sent to sleepwalk around town in search of crazy items? How was that not dangerous? She woke up with somebody’s bones in her hands. She could’ve been arrested. Could’ve crashed her car. Her mouth opened and closed more times, as she scrambled for the words that refused to come out. “But…how can you— ” she clenched jaw, glaring at Alcher. She let out a sharp breath, shrugging. It was pointless. “We’re really gonna get this amulet...aren’t we?”. Maybe that was fine. Maybe Kevin would let them alone if they did. That would be her wish.

Now Kevin was offering favors? How provocative. Queenie rolled her eyes at the empty promises. She’d love to read the fine print on that verbal contract. And what exactly did Kevin mean by asleep for so very long? Had she been in a coma? Maybe that was why they seemed so disorienting and out of this time period. “So let me get this straight, you want us to find some mysterious amulet for you? And if we find it you’ll ‘owe us big time’?” Queenie gave air quotes around the phrase and crossed her arms. The obvious thing to do would be to scoff, insult Kevin followed by berating Ada for even considering the deal before dragging Nicole out of there so the two could laugh the entire scenario off over brunch. Queenie wasn’t going to claim that Nicole seemed completely sane, but her apprehension definitely gave a better look than her other two options. But yet, the idea had intrigued her. “I assume you have a lead for us then? The town isn’t huge, but we certainly need more to go on if we are expected to find an amulet.”

“Indeed, Queenie,” Kevin said, smile growing. Even though the doubt, the distrust rolled off them in waves, Nicole and Queenie were ever so dependable. She was so very lucky to have them. A brief frown passed over her face, even as she nodded. “I believe I do. It is… difficult. The amulet has been masked from me. If I could find it, I would not ask such a thing of you. But I believe it has been unearthed… or will be soon.” Time was so difficult. In dreams, it was fluid, the past winding around to meet the future, the present in all things. The waking world was rigid, full of hard lines, strict rules. “Here, if you will allow me, I will imprint it in your minds. You will know it the instant you see it. But you must be careful, there are others seeking it, they will try to keep you from it. The words I gave you before, they will protect you when you find the amulet, it will cast away those who have not been granted permission. Alcher, dear, if I may touch your hand?” 

Alcher’s patience for the doctor was beginning to wear. So human, so ignorant, enveloped in her denial. She’d met plenty of people like her, who stuck their heads in the sand , and it only ever ended in tragedy. If Kevin hadn’t taken a liking to her, Alcher would have probably eaten the doctor by now, despite their “civil” conversation. She, instead, turned her focus back to Nicole. “Yes, I think we are,” she answered, “plus, once we’re done, you can go on your way, no?” Again, she motioned for the younger girl to sit near her. Glanced to look back at Kevin, listening intently to her explanation. She could understand needing to find something lost, she’d searched so long for her own loss, after all. Held out her hand without hesitation. “I’ll find this amulet for you,” she said firmly, her eyes set and rigid. Even if the others did not help, this was something Alcher could do. This was something Alcher felt she must do.

Nicole didn’t like that the doctor was asking for more details on the amulet, but she was not about to object and risk being put on the spot again. She kept her mouth shut, hands on her hips as  Kevin offered more information. The more she learned, the harder it was for her to believe they were choosing to go along with it. That she was willing to go and fetch it for her. Maybe she was still connected to Kevin subconsciously. Maybe it wasn’t her fault. She never had a choice, as soon as Kevin had voiced her desire. It had to be. She mentioned they had to be careful, that others were seeking the same treasure— did that not raise any flags? Alcher called for her again. And her confusion grew. She ignored Kevin’s presence for once, eyes darting between the two older women. This was about the people she had experienced that night with. She worried more for them than she cared for mysterious amulets. She swallowed against the knot in her throat. So where did she sit? With Queenie’s blind disbelief or with Alcher’s unquestioning loyalty. “Uh—” Alcher was right. She would go her own way once it was all over. But at the moment, she couldn’t let the woman do it all by herself. “As long as I’m awake, I guess…” she mumbled, watching Alcher extend her hand to Kevin. 

This was all ridiculous. But how many times could Queenie remind herself that this was ridiculous? It all came down to a simple choice. Leave, or extend her hand in whatever crazy ass ritual Kevin had planned. Two options, where one was the obvious and objectively correct choice. And yet despite that, the three of them all seemed to be leaning towards the latter choice. It was the stupid choice for sure. Maybe the dangerous one as well. Queenie didn’t know if there was any truth to Kevin’s theory that others were looking for this mysterious amulet, but it had done exactly as Kevin probably intended - it peaked Queenie’s curiosity. Ada seemed entirely over the two being apprehensive, and Nicole didn’t seem anymore sure of their choice to continue their discussions with Kevin. Overall, it seemed like the three helpers couldn’t be any more different from each other. “Fine.” Queenie sighed, dropping her previously crossed arms and holding out her hand towards Kevin, “I’ll play along and join the little scavenger hunt. From the looks of it, the three of us could use some group building exercises anyways. I am curious about what makes this amulet so special after all.” 

“Thank you, Alcher.” Such an open mind, so welcoming, Kevin’s affection was warm and bleeding, thick enough to seep into the air. Her hands were still not as they should be, but her glamor was powerful, enough to hide them, to make it look, even feel as though they were everything they should be. She closed her eyes as her hand found Alcher’s. The amulet was so clear in her mind, bright and gleaming, a gem ensnared in a knot of petrified wood, as white and solid as bone. A slow breath passed from her lips, so too did she pass the image to Alcher. As her eyes opened once more, she smiled. “There, you have it now.” She reached next for Queenie. “It has power. I will lend you some, if you like, though be careful, I’ve been told it burns.” She let the image pass to Queenie next before her bright eyes turned to Nicole. So sweet, so unsure. “You will be awake, my dear. I will never force anything upon you that you do not wish. And you may leave whenever you like. But if you wish to join them, your hand, please.”

At least the doctor was on board with the crazy plan, Nicole sighed in relief. They would need her, surely. There was no way the hunt for a precious amulet would end with all of them sound and safe. She watched Kevin pass her vision to Alcher. Alcher who was completely sure of herself. She didn’t know much of her yet, but she admired that attitude. She let herself be curious. She tried to make sense of what Kevin was doing, how it worked. Magic? If the circumstances had been different, she would’ve died to learn more. To ask about the extent of Kevin’s powers. Queenie offered her hand next, and her eyebrows rose. She didn’t realize they were all supposed to do that, and it became clearer when Kevin spoke to her. She didn’t look at her. She didn't know what to make of her kindness. Sometimes it felt genuine. But then, she had to wonder if she was just very skilled at manipulating people. “Oh— my bad. I didn’t— I thought...” she pointed at Alcher. That should’ve sufficed. She pressed her lips tightly, before she could retort that Kevin had already forced something on them. She glanced at the other two women, who already had the amulet in their minds. It was okay, neither looked particularly affected. She raised her hand for Kevin to take before the doubts growing within her could push her to back down.  

It had to be a coincidence that Queenie did picture an amulet once Kevin grabbed onto her hand and completed whatever mind trick she was attempting. It made sense of course. Kevin had talked about this amulet. The idea had already been planted deeply within Queenie’s mind. It only made sense that once she had offered her hand to Kevin that Queenie’s idea of an amulet would appear in her head. It wasn’t as if this amulet - if it existed at all - would look like the one Queenie kept thinking of. “Uh, thanks.” She drew her hand back slowly from Kevin after she had finished. She glanced over at Ada. It didn’t seem like the two had much interest in the other, but Queenie wished she knew if a similar image had appeared in her head too. She shook off the feeling. Clearly she was playing along for kicks, because she wanted to see where this was all going. It wasn’t as if she actually believed in any of this crap. “Well, we have the image now. I guess there’s nothing left to do but scour some thrift shops or lost and founds. Maybe we’ll get lucky and come across this magic amulet that you’re looking for.” Queenie glanced at the other two women that had come with her to find Kevin, “Do we leave now, or?”

Kevin’s hand was smaller and softer than Alcher expected it to be. The vision that flashed through her mind gave her a clear picture of the amulet, but she found herself longing for more information. The others were both tense and on edge, but Alcher was almost completely relaxed. She had no reason to fear Kevin, as she’d mentioned before. Perhaps their sleepwalking and nightmares were part of this magic, but Kevin would help them if needed, wouldn’t she? She did not seem the devious type. She nodded at them and waited for them to start their depart before turning to Kevin. “May I...speak to you privately?” she asked, unable to sate her curiosity just yet.

Gently taking Nicole’s hand, Kevin closed her eyes once more, the image passing for a third, and final time. They would find it, she believed in them. Her dreamers would serve her well. “You may leave, if you wish. I do so appreciate you visiting me. It gets rather lonely at times. It was so lovely to see you all again.” She stayed in place, watching Nicole and Queenie head for the mouth of the cave. They didn’t yet trust, didn’t yet believe, but they didn’t need to. Trust was a delicate thing, it would take time, and Kevin had all the time in the world. Her smile turned to Alcher and she offered her hand again. “Of course, my dear. Perhaps we might go a bit deeper into the cave. I would so love to spend more time with you.”

[divineluce]

What Good Can Drinking Do? || Nicole & Luce

Timing: August 26th

Location: Around the Bend

Tagging: @nicsalazar & @divineluce

Description: Nicole and Luce bump into each other after a long night of drinking and unwittingly become knights of the drunken table.

“C’mon, Luce, you’ve had enough. Time to call it quits.” Jake said as he gestured for one of the guys doing security with his hand. Scowling, Luce stood up from the bar, the room spinning a bit as she did so. “Fuck off, Jake. I know when I’ve had enough. I’m just,” Her words slurred together slightly as she headed towards the door, “Leaving because I want to.” She insisted before stepping out into the warm air of summer. Letting out a sigh, she ran a hand through her hair before heading down the street towards Ink Inc. She could crash on the couch there for the night. Sleep it off. Sleep off the bourbon she’d drank to forget how her mother had abandoned the three of them. Sleep off the whiskeys she’d consumed because of the weirdness with Remmy. Sleep off the scotch she’d drunk because of her fucked up situation with Nadia. Sleep it all of and just be left with a hangover in the morning. As she headed down the street, she blinked blearily as she realized she wasn’t the only one stumbling around The Bend late at night. As the other person neared, a drunken smile slid across her face. “Oh. Sup Nicole.”

Nicole couldn’t remember that last time she had been drunk in the streets of White Crest. Probably two or three years ago. She was supposed to be past those days. Or so she thought at least. She wasn’t sure what had triggered her to drink more than she could handle. Maybe it hadn’t been the best week, maybe she had only miscalculated, either way it was too late to ponder on it. What mattered was that she made it home safe. When she left the bar, she let out a breath, willing her brain to focus. She took a few slow steps, hands reaching all over in search of her phone. Where had she put the damn thing? Uber was probably the way to go, if only she could manage to get one. Frustrated, she continued walking, slightly aware that there was someone approaching. As the figure came closer, she realized it was a familiar face. Relieved, she stopped fumbling for her phone, forgetting why she even needed it for. Her lips pressed together into a thin smile, and she tilted her head up in acknowledgement. “Luce...” she could tell she also had some drinks on her too. “Where you going...all good?”  

Running a hand through her hair, Luce did her best to focus on Nicole’s face, though it wasn’t easy in her current state of inebriation. Phew. She’d had more than she’d thought, fuck. Waving a hand, she grinned slightly as she saw that Nicole was also in a similar situation. “Ah, I was just headed back to Ink. Bartender at Soul figured I’d had enough so I’m… making my way downtown.” She laughed, shaking her head at the stupid song that had popped in her head. “Well, down-Bend. Howsabout you?” She asked, the words slurring together slightly as she spoke. “And yeah. Yeah.” Luce paused, her mind drifting back to Remmy’s face, the way she’d held them in the hallway of Morgan’s home, back to the messages from Nadia, desperately trying to hold on. “I’m super good.” She gave two thumbs up and a drunken grin that didn’t quite reach her eyes. 

"Gotcha, you do--you do look like..." nodding, she trailed off, weakly gesturing an invisible bottle. Eyebrows knitted together, and she hummed for a moment as her brain searched for words to answer the question. Why did she make it all the way from The Outskirts to the Bend just to drink? She vaguely remembered. It probably made a lot of sense when she was sober. "Getting an Uber" at that, she reached the inside of her jacket, finally finding her phone. She paused though, when she looked up after a few attempts at unlocking her phone and noticed Luce's face. She wasn't exactly great at reading people, but even she could tell Luce was bullshitting her. Had she been sober, Nicole wouldn't have pushed, she respected everyone's decision to lie or keep stuff to themselves. "Tell that to your face, dude" she nodded, lifting her arm and poking Luce in the forehead. Leaning against the wall, she grinned lazily. "We punching anyone?"

“That obvious, huh?” Luce said, letting out a puff of air in amusement. As Nicole pulled out her phone and leaned against the wall of one of the buildings near them, she stared out idly into the darkness of the Bend. Maybe it was just the slight ringing in her head, the pleasant buzz of alcohol making her senses nice and dull, but it seemed quiet. Quieter than normal. Most nights, she wouldn’t be the only one stumbling back home drunk-- there were all sorts who wandered around this side of town, good and bad. Nicole’s sudden poke to her forehead caught her off guard and she raised a hand to lightly swat her away. “Yeah, yeah--” She said, about to rattle off some insult to take the pressure off her when she heard a scream pierce through the night. Standing bolt upright, Luce looked at Nicole in alarm. “We might be. Fuck. Did you hear where that came from?”

“Yeah, yeah” Nicole nodded absentmindedly, struggling for a second to recall what Luce was replying to. Glancing down at her old phone, she grew annoyed as she waited for the app to load. Maybe it was time to finally invest in a something newer. The scream took her by surprise, which was unusual for Nicole. Just then, as she managed to look at Luce, Nicole felt herself sober up slightly. She pushed herself off the wall, looking back to the street she came from. If only her senses weren’t so numb, it would’ve been a lot easier to figure things out. Her and Luce’s breathing seemed to be overpowering any sound her ears could pick up. She huffed, willing herself to focus. A beat, two beats, and then she heard it. “Couple of streets down… turning the corner” she wasn’t as sure of her accuracy as she would be sober, but it had to count for something. “C’mon, that can’t be good” smacking Luce in the arm, she took off —or rather stumbled—in the direction of the scream.

Nicole’s slap to the arm sent Luce staggering forward, but that was just what she needed to get her stubborn feet moving. She followed behind Nicole, doing her best to keep the other woman in her field of vision as she ran after her. The streetlights were shifting slightly, the world spinning as the two of them made their way towards whoever had screamed. If she had been more sober, Luce might have questioned how Nicole had been able to figure out where the cry had come from. But right now? With alcohol, adrenaline, and no shortage of rage coursing through her system? She didn’t really care. As they rounded the corner, Luce was startled to see that a woman was standing there, alone. But, she looked visibly shaken, the strap of her handbag shredded. “Are you okay?” Luce asked, slightly out of breath and slurring.

In hindsight, attempting to sprint to the location she believed the commotion was, had been a poor idea. It didn’t take long for Nicole to figure that out. Still, powered by the adrenaline and the booze clouding her  judgement, she continued on, almost face planting the ground at least once. Still, she retained some gracefulness, if anything thanks to her ancestors,recovering before she hurt herself. She was the first to turn the corner, spotting a woman clearly rattled trying to gather herself. She reached out, trying to hold the woman's shoulder but miscalculated the distance. She ended up grasping nothing but air instead.  “...Kay?” breathing out, she managed to get half her sentence. Luce seemed to arrive just after her, and did a better job at getting words out. She looked around in the meantime, eyebrows furrowed. If the attacker had attempted to steal the woman’s purse it made no sense for them to run before succeeding. “Where is--” wondering out loud, she turned the opposite direction. Apart from them, it was unusually empty. Yet still, something in her could tell they weren’t alone. “Got a look on your attacker?”

“I-- I don’t-- it was like, someone came out of nowhere--” The woman said, trembling with fear. Luce did her best to maintain some amount of composure, but the alcohol in her system was making it hard for her to stand completely still. Her head bobbled as she swayed, her feet stumbling as the world tilted beneath her. Ohhhh, running had been a bad fucking idea. Leaning against the nearby lamp post, she nodded at the woman emphatically. “Yeah, what she said. D’you get a good look at who attacked you?” Luce asked. The shaken woman shook her head, clutching onto her ruined handbag with a tight hand. Letting out a puff of air that blew her bangs from her forehead, Luce nodded and tilted her head. “Your car nearby? Or house or whatever?” She asked, “You oughta get home. The Bend’s not a super safe place.” Luce said. If she’d been a little more observant, if she’d been a little less drunk, if she’d just listened… maybe she might have noticed the shadowy thing lurking behind the post office box.

Nicole’s eyes darted from Luce to the woman, slowly taking in the words they were saying. Her chest was still heaving after running a few streets. For a brief second she frowned, unable to remember why she and Luce had decided it would be a good idea to run while drunk, but as her eyes landed on the distraught woman once again, all the things spinning around her slowed down. “Yeah, yeah...only idiots  walk alone ‘round these places”. Despite looking the worse of the two, Luce seemed to be handling the situation decently, so Nicole’s attention drifted once again to her surroundings. At the distance she could hear the loud, pounding  music of the many dance clubs in the neighborhood, but focusing on everything close to her was difficult.  Her body turned  instinctively, stepping  away from the pair as she eyed the dumpsters and the trash bags spilling some feet away. The sensation they were being watched was hard to shake. Maybe it wasn’t her annoying gift warning her this time, but just drunken paranoia. However, Nicole was certain she had seen part of a tail behind the post office box. Strange, as all she could see were shadows. There was some sort of animal scent in the air, but in her state Nicole couldn’t be sure of what type. It wasn’t common. Turning back to Luce and the woman, she caught her explaining how she lived a few blocks away and was taking a shortcut home.  “Vural. Gotta get her somewhere safe. Her place isn’t that far, right?” she interrupted, eyes still trained anxiously on the box.

Rolling her eyes at the other woman’s words, Luce offered her most winning smile at the frightened woman. “She didn’t mean to call you an idiot. She’s just drunk. Well, so’m I, but I’m not calling people names.” She said as she did her best to stand upright on her own without the assistance of the lamppost. Squinting at the other woman, she let out a loud puff of air, trying to sober up a little. Christ. She’d really gone hard. Fuck. The woman shifted from foot to foot anxiously, more distressed than she had when they’d first arrived, but that went right over Luce’s head. “My apartment is only a few blocks away and my car’s in the shop. I didn’t think anything would happen if I just took a shortcut home.” The woman mumbled. Luce nodded, though she wasn’t paying much attention. She was too busy fumbling around in the pocket of her shorts, cursing quietly in Turkish at her silver knuckle dusters. They’d gotten stuck and eventually, Luce gave up. Whatever. At Nicole’s words, Luce snapped her fingers and shot a pair of finger guns in her direction. “Yeah-- we should definitely do that. How’d you feel about an escort home? Not one of those escorts. I’m not that easy.” She snorted before patting Nicole on the shoulder. “How’s about it, Nicky?” Luce said, not seeing how the other woman was staring intently at the letter box. 

“Yeah I did” shooting a glance at Luce, Nicole didn’t understand the problem in her words. She scoffed, wanting to explain herself. “We’re all idiots here” to her, ignoring the dangers of walking at night in the worst neighborhood was pretty high in terms of idiocy. The kind of reckless decision only drunks would make. She stopped herself though, when she noticed the woman next to them bouncing anxiously. Guilt turned her stomach. What was the point in being an asshole? Bringing both hands to her face she rubbed her eyes vigorously, wishing it would magically sober her up. She hated being wasted and interacting with people, it usually went even worse than her sober interactions. She let out a groan, shaking her head. “Sorry, it’s...” she looked at the woman, offering an apologetic smile. “You've been through enough in one night, ignore me”. The escort joke went over her head, and she gave Luce a confused look. What was she on about? “How about…?” she trailed off, struggling to follow the conversation. She focused on the box again, still sensing something behind it. It appeared that if she and Luce stayed with the stranger, whatever was waiting on to pounce wouldn’t dare. Why did that make any sense? Nicole didn’t have the mental capacity to ponder on it. “Yes. Yeah, we’ll get you home. She really knows her way around the bend, don’t you Vural?”. Placing a hand on the woman's back, she let her lead the way, careful to keep her from the letter box. 

“Yeah, sure do,” Luce snorted, shaking her head vigorously at the joke before looking at the woman who was still eyeing them with a nervous expression on her face. “We just wanna help, honest.” She said. As Nicole reached out a guided the woman away, Luce watched as some of the tension faded from her body. “Okay. Okay, thank you. I’d really appreciate the company.” She said with a relieved smile. Luce nodded, her head bobbling more than she’d intended. “For sure, for sure. Let’s get you home, okay?” She said before glancing at Nicole. The other woman seemed distracted, but she wasn’t entirely sure why. Lowering her voice to what she thought was a whisper, Luce nudged the woman with her elbow. “If somethings bugging you, let’s get her home first, cool?”

Nicole didn’t say much for the remaining of the walk. Her focus split between her efforts to keep one foot in front of the other, and shielding the woman from the mysterious attacker behind the letter box. As they walked past it, her head turned to check once again for any signs of whatever had hurt the woman. She believed she had seen a dark shadow move behind the box again, but no visible  body. Was it all in her brain? Or maybe...it was a ghost? Nicole scoffed shortly after the idea came to her. No. That was even more stupid. They wouldn’t have shadows, which she definitely saw, right? Thank god she didn’t say that out loud, not even drunkenness would’ve justified that. Her thoughts were luckily interrupted by an elbow to her arm. “Weird shit, man. Weird shit going on” she retorted, lips barely moving. She couldn’t shake the feeling that the night could’ve ended much differently for the woman she was guiding home. Nicole could still hear her erratic heartbeat and she was certain it wouldn't change until she was safely home. “I’m crashing wherever you do, by the way. Can’t take my ass home tonight”. Her last words floated between the three for a while, as they silently made it to the woman’s place. There would be time for regrets in the morning --the hangover would definitely punish her-- but even if she had promised not to get wasted again, part of her was glad she and Luce had been at the right place and the right time to give someone a hand. 

[parabellumrpg]

WHEN: Saturday, August 1st. WHERE: Sapphire (Neutral) HOSTED BY: Mia Costello TIME: 7:00 PM CST DRESS CODE: Assigned Costume OOC TIME: 6:00 PM CST 

Chanel Albright, the Costello’s notorious publicist, is turning 29 and all of Chicago’s elite, spontaneous, reckless and eyebrow raising are invited. Hosted and thrown by one of Chicago’s former news headliners, Mia Costello. This is a private event where two things allow you entrance into Sapphire, a personalized VIP pass and being dressed as the 90s or 00s artist listed on said pass. Failure to meet the dress code or to arrive in costume as someone other than the name on the pass results in not only a denied entry but immediate escorting from Sapphire’s premises. 

Liquor, food, 90s/00s nostalgia and music will be in abundance. Drinks are practically free and the night will be wild and one to be remembered. Cell Phones and digital cameras are traded in for polaroid and disposable cameras. Sapphire has been transformed from the club of the present to that of the past with classics of each era and a few modern amenities provided for guests entertainment. Costello and private security are heavily in attendance to make sure things do not get too out of hand. 

A/N: A special THANK YOU to Isa for putting this all together. She assigned every character a 90s/00s icon to dress up as – even the ones who aren’t taken! Everyone’s costumes will be listed below. She also made a playlist (listen here) and typed everything up. I didn’t have to do much work for this at all! Thank you for coming up with such a fun idea for everyone to participate in! 

With that being said, I think I can trust everyone here to write and do replies however they see fit. If you want to write interactions via Chatzy/Discord, that’s fine, just make sure to post them on the dash if anything important happens so that we can all read! Try to stay on top of replies (this especially goes for ME, I suck). Have fun, make sure to check out the assigned costumes below! And make sure your character shows up in costume or they won’t be let in. Don’t make Mia mad, plz, thank you. 

Chanel Albright: Posh Spice

Leon Costello: Justin Timberlake

Ezra Costello: Adam Levine (Maroon 5)

Mia Costello: Ginger Spice

Sofia Costello: Baby Spice

Luca Costello: John Mayer

Natalia Cardoza: Christina Aguliera

Camila Perez: Mariah Carey

Jackson Sinclair: Nick Carter

Margot Sinclair: Britney Spears

Noah Sinclair: Matthew Bellamy - Muse

Paityn Sinclair (Costello): Courtney Love

Sebastian Sinclair: Eminem

Felicity Sinclair: Avril Lavinge

Matthew Dunne: Aaron Carter

Tristan Sullivan: Marky Mark from the Funky Bunch

Joaquin Aleman: Enrique Iglesias

Eva Calderon: Shakira

Alondra Aleman: Beyonce (Destiny Child’s Era/Early Solo Career)

Livia Moreno: Gwen Stefani

Ambrya Mardin: Jennifer Lopez (JLO)

Not Taken Characters Roles: Who are invited to the party

Violet Costello: Scary Spice

Leo Amari: Marc Anthony

Gabriel Aleman: Jay Z

Charlotte Sinclair: Nicole Scherzinger

Abel Costello: Kurt Cobain

Aaron Kumar: Lenny Kravitz

Angela Webber: Alanis Moresett

Adam Davenport: Rob Thomas

Ben Lowell: Nick Lachey - 98 Degrees

Alex Alverez: 50 Cent

Avery Mercer: Alicia Keys

Liam Edwards: Gerard Way

Corinna Sutter: Whitney Houston

Damon Kent: Jason Maraz

Yvonne Santiago: Sheryl Crow

Jessa Westbrook: Kylie Minogue

Katrina Patani: LeAnn Rimes

Holden Estrada: Lil Bow Wow

Thalia Montoya: Aaliyah

Nicholas Farley: Usher

Mateo Lujan: Sting

Thomas Sinclair: Billie Joel Armstrong - Green Day

Juliet Carmichael: Celine Dion

Dennis: David Beckham

[zahneundklauen-retired]

[meta] Is there anything that weighs heavy on your character's conscience right now? What do they plan to do about it, if anything?

[meta] Well, I think that chatzy with Leah and Nicole really answers this. Short answer? Yes. What she plans to do about it? Move on. There's nothing she can do to right what she did, so she will just move on and hopefully if confronted with that decision again, make the right one.

[powercouragewisdom]

so

after havin to-the last few years-give the world more attention, another degree, had a job then another etc..

I realized the best people I have ever met are on the internet; whether tumblr here starting 2012(😂, we know why), anime sites long before that, my kdrama community, jpopasia before they changed it way too much etc you guys are the best and I haven’t met or been around anyone/any group of friends as real, legit, accepting, fun, hilarious and just decent people anywhere. Due to this, I am officially re-dedicating myself to online life and the good times we’re still having and likely will keep having.

Had this realization as I began scrolling through my blog (incl. videos) from the beginning today fandomentals.tumblr.com/page/185 (whichyoushoulddoimmediatelyandmsgreplycommentsowecantalkaboutit)

Though had to, I’ve been away off and on from the site and others for a few years, but I’m done with that/not being on and I’m back.

From the chatzys, to the tiny chats, fanfics, our youtube edits😍, soundtracks, messages, likes and reblogs, you guys are the g.o.a.t.s

and those I haven’t talked to that much(haven’t officially met) or haven’t talked to in a little bit, please reach out/feel free if you like or interact if u want, as I’ll likely pop a message anyway! friends/mutuals love tag: @anonmarleighdourif @ancientsheikah @labyrinthisthebest @obligatorychinchillas @toastyasian @e-lectroma ~nicole

[chasseurdeloup-retired]

Brittle Blazes || Nicole and Kaden

TIMING: Current LOCATION: White Crest National Park PARTIES: @nicsalazar and @chasseurdeloup SUMMARY: Nicole calls in Animal Control to help with a totally normal not at all supernatural bug infestation. Nothing goes wrong what so ever.

A new day at work often meant a new set of problems to deal with. For the most part Nicole didn’t mind, it kept the job interesting. No day was the same. That particular day wasn’t expected to be the most exciting, though. Beetle infestation near one camping ground, they had said in the morning briefing. Animal control would be present later that day and assess the situation. Boring and annoying. Why people bothered to visit the woods if they hated the bugs was something Nicole still struggled to understand. How hard was it to bring spray with you? Perhaps they should’ve tried the beach instead, she mused as she made her way to the ground hours later. Part of her, however, wasn’t convinced the issues were caused by ordinary beetles. It didn’t explain the few trees that straight up collapsed near the grounds in the previous days, or the crying fits a few campers had experienced. Maybe it was all unrelated, though  if she had learned anything in the years at the park, very rarely that was the case. She stood outside the guardhouse, where she expected to meet with animal control, entertaining herself by keeping an eye on the campsite for any signs of strange activity. Everything appeared frustratingly normal, until she heard steps approaching. Hopefully they’d be done with the beetles soon.

There was a lot in Kaden’s life that didn’t make sense right now. Entirely too much, if he was being honest. Work wasn’t one of them. Work hadn’t abandoned him. It didn’t add to any gnawing ache of emptiness or questions. It sure hadn’t slowed down either. He pull his truck up to the guardhouse. He’d made sure all his equipment was in tow considering he had no clue what he was dealing with. Not yet. “Hey,” he called out to the ranger as he got out of the car. “Officer Langley, animal control,” he said, offering her a hand. “So what is it we’re looking at? Dog? Cat?” Monster? The call mentioned something about beetles and he hoped like hell that was a lie. He trusted the park ranger knew better than to call on animal control for that. “Or something else?” He didn’t know where she stood on the whole supernatural thing and he wasn’t going to be the first to let the cat out of the bag on that one. “Call mentioned something about downed trees, right? We looking at something large?” He’d take stock, figure out what he wanted to bring from his truck based on what she said. Either way, he was pretty sure his shotgun was coming with him. Call it intuition. Or just Wicked’s Rest.

“Right” nodding in acknowledgement, Nicole circled around the truck to meet with him. She went for a quick handshake, eyes only meeting his gaze briefly. “Nicole” with a mumble, she motioned behind them,“this way...I’ll show you”. Eyebrows furrowing at the question, Nicole paused before continuing. She had expected him to know something beforehand, the idea of explaining the ridiculous reason for the call making her dread what was coming. “Uh, not even close— really, shouldn’t have bothered you guys, but—” she began, her tone apologetic. An arborist would have dealt with the trees easily. “The trees— it’s just a few odd things piling up” trying to gauge his reaction, she shot a quick look at him. “We got beetles everywhere...people complained, then trees dropping out of nowhere” she had to mention it, despite no obvious correlation. It wasn’t even the weirdest part. “Then...then—” she played with her belt, bracing herself for the strange looks. Luckily, they were reaching their location, away from the campsite and past the bonfires. They would be near the pond in no time, and she wouldn’t have to explain anything else. “Then, two families...crying for no fu—for no reason. Bawling, couldn’t stop them. Thought some sort of gas leak could’ve been the issue but…” she clicked her tongue, shaking her head as they came to a stop. The beetles were crawling everywhere, that much was evident even if she tried to keep some distance. “If I can help with something, let me know”.

“Nice to meet you Nicole,” he said after shaking her hand. Oh, so she was using her first name. Was Kaden dumb for going all “Officer Langley” on her? Putain. He still barely felt like he knew what the hell he was doing sometimes with the official type stuff. The animals and monsters, however, that he could handle. Only he was starting to wonder what it was he was really going up against. “Yeah I heard something about fallen trees. So I assumed…” Well, it was his fault for assuming, wasn’t it? Shit. He rubbed the back of his neck a moment before pulling out some gear from his truck and following along. He hoped like hell it was enough, or appropriate. Guess he’d find out. “Beetles?” His mind started to narrow down the possibilities. Bug looking monster, alright. That, uh, well it left a lot of options for sure. “Alright. Beetles. Trees dropping. How big were they? And, uh, what do you mean by dropping?” She carried on about the families crying and what not. His brow furrowed, trying to piece it together before they reached the site. He was struggling to find the threads. Until he saw them. “Oh shit,” he said as he watched the maroborers crawl along the forest floor and trees. There were so many. “Putain de merde,” he muttered to himself. “We need to get out of here right n--” He turned and saw that they were surrounded. Small beetle sized monsters surrounded them. Monsters that made things brittle. Brittle enough to crumble to pieces at a single touch if they hung out with them too long. “You really should have called pest control, you know. And not-- putain.” He rubbed his temple a moment to think. He didn’t have fucking bug spray on him. “Fire will work. So will crushing them. But it’s a risk. Both of them. Fuck.”

Nicole pressed her lips into a thin smile at the pleasantry. One look at his equipment calmed some of her nerves. It seemed he had brought something for every possibility. “The size of—the beetles...or, the trees?” she took a moment to glance at him, brow furrowed in confusion. She cleared her throat, rubbing her jaw before continuing “Just that. They collapsed. Healthy trees—weren’t due for any kind of maintenance. No one got hurt, luckily”.  It seemed Officer Langley had managed to figure out the root of the problem the second he laid eyes on the scene. Her eyebrows shot up impressed, thinking of commenting on his knowledge, until he said they had to leave. Taking a step back out of instinct, her eyes widened at his reaction. What was so bad about some beetles? She did agree with him however, that Animal Control shouldn’t have been called in the first place. “Fi—fire. You want to...” she lifted her hand, pointing at the trees surrounding them, “you wanna to burn things...” in a National Park was left unsaid. Judging by the tone of his words she suspected he understood how absurd the suggestion was, or she hoped so. But, if he had been quick enough to assess the problem, she had to trust he knew the right solution. Even if that meant starting a fire in an area it was very much forbidden to do so. Still, she preferred to leave that as a last resort. “Got—I’ve a can of bug spray you can use?” she helplessly offered, hand ghosting over her pocket. No, that was stupid. Why did she say that? One spray wouldn’t do shit against all those bastards. She had underestimated how bad the issue was and the reports hadn’t been too informative either. “W--Why’s crushing them a risk?” she glanced down, finding a few of them crawling under her boot. It could be so easy to do.

“The beetles but I’m not sure I need an answer anymore,” he said, looking around them at the scope of the issue. Kaden really wished they had been facing a big monster knocking down the trees. Like a bies or even a werewolf or literally anything else other than what they were up against. He rubbed his brow, trying to plan the best way to handle this. Safely. “I’m really fucking aware a fire in a forest is a bad idea, alright. I’m just saying it would work.” And possibly destroy half of White Crest’s woods. Which might not be a bad thing considering how many monsters loved there. Putain de merde, no he couldn’t think like that. Probably didn’t work that way in this cursed fucking town anyway. The fire would cause something bigger, badder, far worse. “These bugs. They have pheromones or some shit that make things brittle. Very. They could drill a hole in your skin. Or worse.” As if on cue, Kaden looked over to see a tree covered in the marob just crumble right in front of them. Shit. Fucking shit they were getting closer. Instinctively he stepped on the few threatening to climb up his shoes, slamming his heel down as he killed what he could. He could already feel the rubber sole of his boot getting stiffer, his steps having less give. Fuck. “Spray a path!” he shouted at her. “And cover your face as best you--” A few of the bugs started flying, buzzing near them. He held his jacket up in front of his face, trying to shield it as best he could. “Faster, any fucking faster!” he snapped.

Nicole stared dumbly at Langley as he explained, processing all the information he was throwing at her. Pheromones. Making trees collapse. Drilling holes in your skin. Normal stuff. She swat away a few coming at her face, wincing as she another tree crumbled, this time in front of them. Her mind began to race. Tentative fingers brushed against her radio, debating whether to call for back-up. Did they have resources and equipment for skin drilling bugs? No, they most definitely didn’t. She lowered her hand, deciding against her initial idea. It would only expose more people to it. She could run back, it wouldn’t take her more than a couple  minutes. And then what? Bring the whole stock of bug spray? No, they needed to act fast. She was already failing by going over possibilities while the officer was already taking action. It was just them against the bugs, then. His shout seemed to snap her out of her thoughts, and with a swift move she seized the bottle and sprayed as told. It felt like an uphill battle. As much as she sprayed, the bugs kept finding different paths to get to them. She raised the collar of her shirt to her nose, shaking her spray until it was empty. She coughed, paranoia setting in. It was too late for her. She could feel it. Particles, pheromones, whatever the fuck, in her throat, in her lungs. She remained stoic, a slight frown the only tell sign that something was happening inside her. The bugs flew closer now, from every direction. “Look just— just burn it all down” she let out, breathless. No. No that wasn’t a good idea, it was a terrible, dangerous, very illegal idea. But she couldn’t think straight knowing she might turn into dust any second now. She stumbled backward, “I’ll—I’ll get some extinguishers. The—the bonfires are close...we have them there” and buckets, she remembered. They could use the pond's water too. For once she didn’t wait for the okay, she couldn’t waste another second. She shot one last distraught look at the officer before she took off as fast as her legs allowed her, no time for pretending to be human.

Kaden pulled his collar up to try and cover his face, but it didn’t do much. Putain, putain, putain. They were definitely going to ingest some of the pheromones, no doubt about it. He just hoped it wasn’t too much. At least she acted fast enough, spraying the bugs away and he followed her as they picked a path away from them. Or tried to, at least. He ran after her, trying to breathe as little as possible. Which wasn’t exactly possible while running. “Burn it down?” It sure sounded like a terrible plan but he wasn’t going to argue with her when he didn’t have a better one. “Okay.” His words were muffled by the fabric attempting to cover his face. She ran off to what he assumed was the bonfires. Really fast, too. Huh. She must have been a runner. Right. Okay. Focus. Burning down. Burn it down. He was going to burn down the forest to kill the maroberers. With what? That’s right. He rummaged one handed for his lighter. Shit, shit, shit, this was an awful idea. He looked down and he saw flakes coming off of his jacket. Putain. He liked this jacket, too. “Fucking hell,” he grumbled to himself, wasting breath he shouldn’t and breathing in more pheromones with every word. Great. He had a lighter. Now the fuck what? He stomped his feet around him, doing everything he could to squash the bugs nearby, frantically looking for something, anything, that would catch. Leaves. Pile of leaves. That was about to be overtaken by bugs. Putain. Kaden ran over, desperately holding his jacket in front of his face as he did, his lungs begging for deeper breaths, more air than he was allowing. He flipped open the lighter and did his best to coax it alive. It caught and started to burn, blazing brighter with every second. He scrambled for more leaves, branches, to build it, help it move along the woods. Hopefully she got back with that extinguisher soon. And shit, how to get the bugs in the flames. He exhaled a small sigh. Was he really going to sacrifice the jacket? At least it wasn’t his favorite. Putain. He shrugged it off him and started using it to scoop up bugs and throw them on the flames. The fire was growing as he did, but the bugs kept coming. Shit.

Nicole couldn’t remember the last time she had run at full speed. Years and years ago, no doubt. She had been too concerned with appearing human to ever attempt it. It was entirely too freeing, but she had no time to process the conflicting feelings. She powered through, despite the dryness in her throat and her lungs threatening to collapse. Long strides and fast cadence, she made it to the campfires site in a matter of minutes. Her legs weren’t the only thing running, though. She couldn’t stop her panicky mind. She was going to be in so much trouble. Probation time at least, if she was extremely lucky. What was she thinking? She wasn’t, clearly. If those things could get in her brain too, they definitely were. She didn’t want to think about the problems she could get officer Langley into. She had trusted him blindly. Stupidly, almost. He seemed knowledgeable and prepared. But what if he got it wrong? What if arson wasn’t needed and she had gone and supported him on that insane idea for nothing? She burst into the empty station and barged straight into the storage to gather what she needed. One, two fire extinguishers. The biggest they had. Her chest heaved painfully, eyes darting across the poorly illuminated room. Her stomach sank. She didn’t have enough hands for every item. Tears began to sting in the corners of her eyes. Was it frustration at her incompetence to blame, or the bug’s pheromones doing its work? She couldn’t tell. Both were equally likely. Judging by the smell, Langley had succeeded at starting the fire. He needed her now. Fuck, it was such a bad idea. She blinked tears away furiously, stacking a couple of buckets and slid her hand under the handles, holding them with her wrist. Two extinguishers in her hands, she took off. She clenched her jaw, breathing sharply through her nose. The knot in her throat was messing with her. The smoke column was easy to spot, and within minutes, she made it back to the officer. To say he was struggling was an understatement. “Fuck” fuck, fuck, fuck. He didn’t look close to done. They couldn’t put out  the fire yet. She dropped everything and took off her own jacket, imitating the man’s motion to lure the bugs into the fire. People would start to notice if they hadn’t already. The smell, the smoke. “Now what?!”, her shout was muffled by the elbow covering her nose.

“That was fast,” Kaden said as she came sprinting back with the extinguishers. He’d hardly noticed she had left. Might not have even believed she had made it all the way there and back  had it not been for the extinguishers in her hand. Little by little, the fire was growing, but it was slow. “Come on, come on,” Kaden said to it, as if it could respond to him. Shit, that was stupid. Speaking meant he was breathing more. And that meant… Fuck. He kept shoveling bugs into the flames alongside her. It was doing something, but not enough. He had to figure something out. He had to. He turned around, spinning, looking for anything when he crashed right into her as she was continuing funnel bugs to the flames. “Watch it!” he snapped. It was harsher than he’d expected it to be, angry and sharp. Huh. Oh well. Even so, something clicked. “Bug spray! Now!” he said as he reached out to yank the can from her. He turned and started spraying a line on the ground, back and forth, as much as he could. Then he pulled out his lighter again. “Back up!” It was the only warning he gave before he set the area on fire. The flames roared to life, brighter and faster than the other. He threw more leaves and under brush towards it along with whatever insects he could manage. “Get off me you fucking assholes!” he yelled at them as he flung them away from him. The bugs were dwindling. The just might have dealt with them. The problem was the fire was catching. Rapidly. “Shit. Shit! We have to run! Or something!” he said, backing up towards her. He wasn’t sure a fire extinguisher or two was going to cut it. Putain.

Focused on the task at hand, Nicole could barely hear what the officer was saying, choosing to remain quiet instead. Her brain registered his words a moment later. She had been so concerned about the urgency of the situation that she hadn’t stopped to consider how fast she had been. She hoped, with the adrenaline of the moment he wouldn’t pick up on certain things. After all, who would think about sprint times when the threat of turning into dust loomed over them. Priorities, right? It was becoming difficult to breathe properly while covering her face from the beetles and the tears filling her eyes didn’t help to guide the bugs the right way. She huffed when he crashed into her, but stood her ground. Through glossy eyes she shot him an angry look. Did he have to be so clumsy? She shook her head, that was hardly something to get mad about, the fuck? She let him take the spray, surprised there was any left, but it seemed to do the trick. The fire grew faster than before. Perhaps a little too fast— in the blink of an eye it seemed to get out of hand. Not that she ever fully believed starting a fire was a good idea to begin with, but seeing the rapid destruction in front of her brought more tears to her eyes. She couldn’t blame it on bugs’ pheromones. Though maybe it was increasing her own proclivity to cry about many things. She had to call the fire management unit. If people saw she stood there and did nothing to stop the flames she’d be fired. She reached for her radio, but a wild flame jumped toward them. She stumbled backward, as Langley shouted for them to run. That was smart yes, but she couldn’t do that. She didn’t do smart. ‘Or something’ sounded better. Her hand closed on his forearm and she forcefully tugged him backward, to where she had dropped the extinguishers. Taking one, she pulled the pin to unlock it, wasting no time to squeeze the levers. “Get the other one!” the knot in her throat made her voice shaky, her order sounding more like a plea. They had to control it somehow.

Kaden was prepared to take off running. He wasn’t a fucking fire fighter. He threw himself into a lot of danger, sure, but standing around while there was a fucking forest fire? Not one of them. But she grabbed his wrist and kept him there. “Are you fucking kidding me?” he shot her. “Just us and two fucking fire ex--” He started coughing before he could get all the words out. But honestly, they were going to be the force to stop this shit? Fucking hell. He still thought they should run. It was clear she wasn’t leaving, though. He could pick her up and carry her. Fuck, that’d slow him down way too much it wouldn’t be worth it. “Bordel de merde, “ he grumbled to himself, picking up the stupid fucking extinguisher. This was moronic. He tried to cover his face with his collar again before pulling the pin for the extinguisher. The heat from the flames stung his eyes and breathing was getting harder and harder. But he didn’t have much of a choice, did he? He stood there and doused the flames as best he could with the extinguisher. At first, he wasn’t sure if it was working, the flames seemed like they were fighting back with everything they had. But there was no other option but to stand there and keep trying. At least for now. “Is this,” he coughed some more, “is this working?”

“Just— shut...shut the fuck up and help, jesus!” despite hearing her own voice, the words still felt foreign. Nicole couldn’t remember the last time she had been so frustrated. She didn’t have time to question her sanity. Not when all she could focus on was putting out the fire. Between the smoke and the pheromones, she wasn’t sure her lungs were having the best of times. Thankfully, their combined efforts seemed to appease the flames, if only for a brief moment of hope. It was easy to ignore the stabbing pain under her ribs, or the way her legs felt like giving up when it appeared they would get things under control. At least, she couldn’t see any more beetles flying. Small victories. The fire fought back, however, extending despite the initial decline. It caught nearby trees, violently consuming one. It crumbled in front of them, causing her to retreat. All the progress they had made, gone. She shook her head, groaning at the physical effort. No, it wasn’t working. “God” a sob escaped her lips, turning into a cough fit. “It—it’s not. It’s...n—ot” her chest heaved as she gasped for air. She tried to hold onto him, but he wasn't at reaching distance. She dropped the extinguisher to the floor, her arm felt like it was gonna fall as well. She had to contact the firefighters. They would ask questions, investigate, sure. It was their job. They’d realize it was intentional. She didn’t think the bug threat would be a valid excuse. But she couldn’t risk the officer’s life any longer. “Run....” she managed to rasp, weakly motioning him to drop the extinguisher. Bringing a hand to her chest, she picked up her radio and did what she should’ve done in the first place. She stumbled backward, trying to get to Langley. Now they had to run to safety before the flames embraced them.

“I fucking am!” Kaden snapped back. He grumbled some more as he continued trying to fight the flames. As much as they were trying to push the fire back, it was winning. The heat and smoke slowly overtook the area growing and spreading faster than they could work. It was more than some sily fire extinguishers could handle. For a moment, he was stunned and stood in silent awe. Then he felt the smoke prick at his eyes and lungs, snapping back into reality. Shit. He heard her gasping behind him. She suggested what they should have done all along. Run. She didn’t have to tell him twice. He turned and started to run. Every step felt harder and hard. His lungs pleaded for more air, but each breath pulled in more smoke. His pace slowed, the coughs started to take over as he stumbled through the brush. She was just in front of him. Good. She could run faster. She’d be okay. He didn’t have to worry about her. Just had to keep pushing forward. His legs felt like lead but he kept going. Until his foot caught on a root, sending him sprawled on the forest floor, doubled over and coughing. Fuck. He groaned as he pushed himself up. Had to beat the flames. Had to keep moving. A little farther and they were at the office, his truck still parked in front. “Get in,” he said through coughs as he swung open the driver’s side door, throwing himself inside. He had no idea if they were in the clear this far up but he didn’t want to take any chances. “I’ll call it in, too,” he said, “but we have to get out of here.”

Once she made sure Langley had understood the message, Nicole took off. Her legs weren’t as powerful as they had been earlier, but still maintained a good distance from the flames. Her attention was on the steps behind her, turning every now and then to make sure he still followed. Her stomach sank when she heard him stumble, freezing for a moment before she saw him pick himself up. She watched him until she was sure he could continue. And they ran again, this time the station in sight. Somehow she managed to climb the truck as he ordered, smashing the door shut. Only then she allowed herself to believe danger was behind them. She threw her head back, panting painfully. The pressure in her chest wouldn’t let her catch her breath. She lifted her arm to her forehead, noticing how hot her skin was. She was dying for some water. She turned in her seat, trying to get a look through the back window. They were at a safe distance, but the flames would keep growing. Her heart hammered wildly in her ears. Or was it his? Bringing the radio to her lips, she waited. When the other end spoke up, she let out a shaky breath before relaying the information. She did her best not to let her voice waver, being as precise as her foggy brain allowed her. After the location details, she advised to dispatch more than one management unit, though she figured they’d assess that on site. Once the static signaled the end of the conversation, she groaned, another fit of cough taking over her body. She spared one look at the officer. She was ready to hear the ‘I told you so’. She deserved it. She had been so reckless. And shit— was she going to keep crying? How powerful were those bugs? She closed her eyes, shaking her head. “Shit...you alright?” No, of course not. What could she even say to him? “Sorry for— snapping at you and…” she coughed, “sorry...I really thought—-I don’t...don’t know what I thought.”

As soon as they were both in the truck, Kaden took off down the winding path back towards the main road. It wasn’t reckless driving but it sure wasn’t the pinnacle of safety. He grabbed his own radio and started calling it into the WCPD, doubling down on the need for the fire department. The fire in the woods would only grow for the time being, it would swallow up everything in sight. He needed to be sure it wasn’t them. There were no screams in the distance, no marker of his imminent death that he could make out. That didn’t do much to stop his heart from hammering. He turned the truck, parked it at the side of the entrance to the park, leaning over the wheel and letting out a few more coughs he’d been holding back. It took him a moment to make out what she was saying in between hacking up his own lungs, but when he turned he saw she was tearing up. “It’s fine. You don’t--” He started but sighed before he could figure out what he was trying to say. “You don’t have to apologize. I--” Kaden was fairly certain this was his fault. Hell, this was his idea anyway. He turned back to look at the smoke billowing up through the trees in the distance. He had no idea if it was the right call. The maroberers in that area were dead, certainly. But he’d helped burn down who knew how much of the forest. Then again, White Crest. Those woods were dangerous. Maybe it was the right call after all. “This was my idea. You don’t have to--” He looked back over at her. Clearly she didn’t have to handle situations quite like this too often. He wished he could say the same. “You alright? I’m not… I’m not sure if we can leave the scene. But I can see if one of my colleagues can drive by with something.” Kaden wasn’t sure how to be reassuring in these sorts of moments. “It’ll be okay,” he told her. “Just breathe. It’ll be okay. This will pass.”

It had to be the most intense car ride Nicole had experienced. If it weren't for the threat of fire hovering over them, it would’ve been a thrilling experience. That thought alone was proof her emotions weren’t in check yet. When he approached the park’s entrance, her breathing was  less shallow. Anger towards him bubbled again when he spoke. She would’ve preferred him to be honest. It was definitely not fine, not when the flames had already consumed so much  territory. Fuck, she hoped it’d stay away from the campsite. She opened her mouth to reply a few times, finding herself with nothing to say. She was even angrier at herself. She should’ve said no. Had she suddenly forgotten what her job was supposed to be? She forced herself not to think about her job situation after everything. She wouldn’t snap at him again, though. As much as it would’ve made her feel better. He couldn’t feel that great either. He had started the fire after all. “No. No we can’t—they’ll want” she pressed her lips tightly, frustrated at her own tears she shook her head, “we’ll have to talk to them” he knew, there was no point in explaining it. “I’m...I’m—the bugs...” she set her jaw, failing to explain why she still appeared to be tearing up. She exhaled sharply when he told her to breathe. She wasn’t even sure the difficulty to get air into her lungs was down to the smoke anymore, she really hated to be so vulnerable in front of a stranger. She couldn’t see, realistically, how things could be okay, but if that’s what he needed to tell himself she wasn’t going to go against it. Apprehensive eyes met his gaze for a moment, before examining his face. He was a mess, she had to be in a similar state. She wanted to thank him for not leaving her behind, but she couldn’t get her mouth to work. Eyebrows knit together, she nodded slowly. “Okay” was all she said, before opening the door. At the distance she began to hear sirens. All she could do now was to hope it’d be over soon.

[braindeacl]

Into the Thick of It (Ugh) | Eilidh & Nicole

SETTING: White Crest National Park. TIMING: Recent. Late at night. PARTIES: @nicsalazar & @braindeacl SUMMARY: Eilidh and Nicole go on a search to find Bigfoot. They run into his weird cousin.  WARNINGS: N/A

With the light of the moon to guide her way, Eilidh trekked further and further within the wood. The cosmic luminescence looked gently down upon her, but with each step, it grew weaker and weaker. Trees blended with the sky until nothing separated the two. Before the darkness could fully engulf her, claim her in its wide embrace, she stopped. And waited. The only indication she was there was her flashlight—a beacon.

Typically, Eilidh wasn’t one for the night shift. Personally, she’d rather be snuggling with Tulip. Especially for something so trivial. What was this, the fourth case of boy-who-cried-bigfoot? What first caused excitement and wonder, now caused a scoff. Not that she was a skeptic. Anything was possible, and Bigfoot was not beyond the limits of her imaginations. But, with that fear locked into everyone’s mind, anything lurking in the corner of your eye could be a ‘monster’. So it very well could be a bear. The past three times it was a bear or something else of the sort. But there had been multiple sightings of this specific ‘Bigfoot.’ A part of her dared to hope that finally, finally she’d be able to see it. Regardless of its name, it had been seen earlier heading the very same direction Eilidh stood now. It was her job to help investigate the whatever-it-was, give it a name and show what it truly was—just another creature, supernatural or not. Or, at the very least, make sure whatever-it-was wasn’t causing any harm to the local flora and fauna. As of yet, she hadn’t seen anything out of the ordinary. Especially by White Crest’s low standards.

The sudden return of light caught her eye, and she directed her own at the source. “Hey, Nic!” Eilidh offered a brief wave. “Would’ve waited for you further back. But got bored.” With her flashlight, she motioned forward. Enveloped in illumination, the forest was almost inviting. “Let’s go check on this B-b-b-biiigfoot.”

Nicole thought going back to work would fix most of her problems. Less time sitting at home with nothing to do, meant less time to deal with the demons in her head. So work? A pretty fucking good distraction— in theory. But in reality, it didn’t turn out that way. She was doing terribly at her job too. But she was still adjusting, right? She was still adjusting, she kept telling herself, despite being back for weeks now. It didn’t help that the Park was nothing but chaos after the news of a Bigfoot sighting broke out. The same reports that happened every couple of months or so, Nicole had learned after the first few the dozens of briefings she had attended over the years. Yet the bastard was never found. And they were left to deal with the chaos that was dealing with the increase in visitors flocking to the park in hopes of catching the monster with their cameras, putting themselves in danger in the process. 

 Apparently the Park wanted a more hands on approach this time, and Nicole ended up getting roped into the investigation the foresters were supposed to do. Her first field activity since coming back to work. The night shift was always dangerous, but never as terrifying as the office hours, so to walk around the woods searching for a non-existent beast looked like a fine alternative. Finally being back on the trails would be a good thing. 

 Nicole ventured deep into the forest,  swaying her flashlight lazily. She had no use for it when she had other senses to pick up on anything strange. And soon enough, she found her companion for the night. She liked Eilidh, even if her very tense demeanor didn’t read that way. “Hey…” her lips pressed into a thin smile, unsure how to feel about the nickname. But that ship sailed the first time they met. “Right” she nodded, following the woman a few steps behind. “You know...this is the first time they’ve wanted us to see what the fuck is out there. I’m not sure if that’s— you haven’t heard any rumors...right?”  

Eilidh quirked an eyebrow. “Rumors?” The location this supposed creature kept frequenting was a bit concerning, or a bit intriguing, depending on your mindset. It was in one of the many parts of the forest that seemed to attract supernatural creatures like flies to a corpse. And it was peculiar its classification had yet to be determined. The Park was typically so quick, so determined, so desperate to uncover the source of odd activities. Activities they would only be publicly hinted at—only enough to maintain safety. So, talk of the truth was discouraged. Having too many noses sticking themselves into where they didn’t belong always led to issues. Curiosity may kill the cat. Or exposure of the supernatural community, and with the popularity that Bigfoot carried, such publicity would be far and wide and deadly. Either way, death could be found at the conclusion.

Despite the concerns, tales still circulated around the town, as they always did. She couldn’t help a chuckle as she recalled one. “Aye. Supposedly some guy saw this ‘Bigfoot’ digging up flowers near here. Maybe he fucked up. Needs a bouquet for Mrs. Bigfoot.” The scenario played in the back of her mind, and that chuckle twinkled again in the back of her throat. Without breaking her stride, she fished out a handful of wildflowers from her backpack. “So, I brought this as a peace offering.” There was a pause, and it was here that her stride did falter for a moment, as she replayed the conversation in her head. “Or, wait. You mean this place?” The two found themselves heading into a part of the Park shrouded in mystery, especially to regular citizens. And mystery always gave birth to hearsay. 

Nicole already assumed that anyone who worked at the National Park knew about the supernatural. One way or the other. It was just the way the job went. Every now and then, weird shit was bound to happen. People died. Rangers died. So she didn’t second guess herself, the usual apprehension gone from her voice as she caught up to Eilidh. “Rumors...” she repeated, redirecting her flashlight to the ground. Wasn’t Bigfoot supposed to leave giant footprints? “Before—  the last couple of times this happened… I don’t know if you—” she trailed off. The other woman was newer at the job, she couldn’t recall if she had dealt with it before. “The park used to ignore the whole Bigfoot shit”. Their plan always entailed warning people about bears to keep them away. And add more patrolling, so much more patrolling. It hadn’t been exactly successful. So she couldn’t fault the Park for wanting to try a new approach. “So I was thinking— I don’t know, maybe... they really do think there's a monster out there this time. And it’s not just… a wild animal”. 

Nicole couldn’t remember being so deep into that side of the park before. Perks of the job. She was never done discovering things. Her partner's joke felt out of place, considering the danger they could be dealing with, but somehow it managed to ease the tension she had been carrying for most of the day.  She made sure to keep her chuckle quiet enough. It was a good thing that Eilidh seemed in good spirits at least. It would make the night shift more bearable. “And we’re about to walk into them having a fight? Ah shit... it’s not too late to go back” she mumbled, eyes darting quickly around the dark. She had to keep her senses open if she wanted them to stay safe. She was ready to run at the first sign of the beast. No more playing hero for her. A branch snapped at the distance, and Nicole tensed immediately. “Heard something move” she held her arm up to stop Eilidh. “I think…” she added, because fuck, she couldn’t be sure of anything in her life anymore. She nudged the flashlight in the direction of the sound, but took no steps. “Probably just an animal, but...” she hated that she couldn’t go ahead and investigate. She was scared of many things, but it had never interfered with her job before.

Monster. Unless she meant some great evil decided to spend its free time spooking and inconveniencing tourists, Eilidh assumed what Nicole meant was something supernatural. Eilidh hated when it was used that way. To describe a creature beyond normal human comprehension; to look at a living being’s nature and condone it for something it couldn’t control. “It wouldn’t be a monster.” Her voice was suddenly curt. “Just another animal. Supernatural or not.” Hopefully, whatever it may be, it was something they could handle. 

Eilidh perked at the continuation of her quip. It was still exciting when Nicole decided to play along, indulge her, so she wouldn’t waste this moment. “If we don’t help, how will they save their marriage?” But as Nicole’s hand rose, her brief return to good humor was cut short. She stopped, perplexed. Her head began to swivel, trying to pick up anything on her end, but her ears only perceived the typical ebb and flow of a forest at rest. Even when the direction was pointed out to her, nothing new became apparent. So, she sought help from her secret friend. With the slightest of motions, she jerked her chin forward—a signal, a command. After a tense moment, answers were brought, but they weren’t very enlightening. It was very dark, after all, and James had trouble seeing much of anything. But he still could hear. Eyes locked on the invisible figure, Eilidh’s expression became even more confused as he laid out what he heard. “Oom oom?” She mouthed. 

Ooooooom ooooooom answered. Within seconds, some of the distant trees illuminated by Nicole’s light began to shake, overwhelmed with a sudden weight. Eilidh looked up. Something looked back. 

“Yeah, you don’t know that…” Nicole mumbled to herself, aware of how unconvincing she sounded. Maybe Eilidh did have more knowledge, but she didn’t want to have the monster argument with anyone else. She couldn’t see herself changing her opinion on that. “Just hope you’re right” she let out a weary sigh, knowing hope hadn’t been on her side lately.  “I don’t think they’re paying us enough for that” a laugh caught in her throat. The atmosphere changed so quickly between them that she had no time to wipe the grin off her face. “Shit...shit” The forest floor shook under them, and the rustling of the trees was followed by an ominous—  Voice? Nicole wasn’t sure. A few months ago, the noise wouldn’t have stopped her. The noise would’ve been an invitation to go on and get more answers. Meet the mysterious creature in the heart of the woods. God she used to be stupid. The realization wasn’t new, but it was good to add more proof to it. 

“Back up” Nicole tried to grab Eilidh’s shirt, but she was out of her reach. “Hey!” she called again, the ground shaking made it hard to keep her balance. She lowered her flashlight. She could make out the tall shadow — much taller than both of them— pacing between trees. The thought of switching to her night vision briefly crossed her mind. No, no. There was no point in doing that. She’d draw more attention glowing in the dark. The creature, monster...whatever it was continued to approach, coming to a sudden stop right when Nicole was ready to pick up Eilidh and bolt. “Whatever that is— we should fuck off” words spilled out of her mouth with urgency. Fuck that. She had learned her lesson. But the giant figure didn’t seem interested in them, instead lowered its body to the ground and poked with a giant hand something she couldn’t make out. Her nostrils flared, hoping a scent would clue her in. It was something familiar. Something she had been close to recently. Something she could smell on her partner’s clothes sometimes. “Eilidh” she whispered, and for once she didn’t think about how uncomfortable it was to call someone by their first name. Shivers ran down her spine when she finally processed the smell. “Uh, do we— you know of any missing people reports around the area?”

Like the first sight of the sun after a storm, the scent overcame Eilidh—blinding. Flesh spiced with death. Oozing sweet liquids she wished to lick. Her teeth gave an involuntary chatter before it was cut short as she dug her nails into her hands, threatening to puncture. If Nicole weren’t around, she’d be tempted to play tug-of-war with the meal, test this creature’s might. Or perhaps even share. She only really wanted one part, anyhow. But eating a corpse in front of a coworker would doubtfully result in anything positive. Damn. Instincts were gripped tight and dampened—the action made part of her feel hollow. Doubt that’s the infamous Bigfoot. She couldn’t recall ‘eating hikers’ being mentioned in that Bigfoot conspiracy documentary James made her watch. Double damn. But, this was still turning into a fascinating mystery, because the question still remained: what the fuck was that? Captivated by the mystique of the unknown, eyes wide in wonder, she almost was left unaware of her companion’s high nerves. The use of her first name brought her back. Momentarily she felt exposed, anger arriving as a defense. But distraction soon came. Missing people. Right. Where did the body come from? It seemed like this creature was scavenging, not hunting. Where was the hunter? “Nothing specific,” she lied, though she truthfully had no idea who the corpse once was, “but people disappear all the time. There’s plenty options.”

Eilidh wanted, needed, to get a closer look. At least a small peek. What was the cause of death? Could this be chalked up to a creature or being that couldn’t finish a meal. A freak accident. Or something unneeded, something out of passion rather than survival. Something human. Ignoring Nicole’s signals to retreat, she took a step forward. Craning her neck, trying to see the body without notice. As the creature whipped its head back, it was evident she failed. She froze. It simply flared its nostrils in response: a sniff. Then, it stood. She bared her teeth, a hiss whistled passed her exposed canines. It sniffed again. Disregarding its previous engagement, the creature inched closer. It was only then she began to back up, to the best of her ability as the ground shivered below her under its might. Despite that, she remained focused on the creature. Her hand quickly moved to the dagger hidden under her skirt. Though unsheathed, she kept the weapon close to her hip. She did not want a fight. 

Nicole let out a grumble in agreement. People disappeared all the time. There was a reason everyone signed the waiver at the entrance. The bodies they were able to find were the lucky ones. “Right,” like the one in front of them, about to become food for a mysterious creature. Yeah, so fucking lucky. They remained quiet, watching the beast poke the body. Maybe it wasn’t that good of a meal. She swallowed, considering the very real possibility that maybe, it prefered fresher food. She reached for Eilidh's arm again, not taking her eyes off the danger. Only then she noticed her partner had gone and moved closer. Her hands balled into fists, resisting the urge to yell at her. She hated the small part of her that couldn’t blame the woman for her curiosity. Not long ago, she would’ve loved to be close to what was one of the biggest mysteries in the world. If it was Bigfoot at all. But she wasn’t sure how willing she was to risk her life at the park after everything she had gone through. 

The thought of not fitting the job she loved so much anymore wasn’t something Nicole wanted to deal with yet. She couldn't consider it. She gripped the flashlight tighter, forcing herself to step forward to meet Eilidh.

The creature picked up on their presence, but it wasn’t until Nicole heard Eilidh’s hissing that she dared to say anything. And— she really had to wonder if she heard that right. “Are you... out of your fucking mind?” she scoffed, eyes wide as she looked between the monster and the woman. “Macleod” she called, her voice colder. She was addressing a coworker, not the person who made her feel more comfortable than anyone at the Park. The beast examined them for a moment. Or rather, it examined Eilidh. It was as if Nicole didn’t exist. She held her breath until the beast lost interest and started munching on the dead body’s...hair?  It was a nasty sight. 

She couldn’t be the person who stood behind and let other people take the lead anymore. Nicole grabbed Eilidh’s cold hand, giving it a forceful pull.”That’s it, we came—  we saw — we can go back a-and warn everybody else. Let’s just get the fuck away. Or— or we’re gonna be the fucking main course!”. Her sudden movement alerted the creature once again. It discarded the rest of the body, eyes glowing with new interest at the sight of Eilidh. That was it, they were about to be eaten. It was safe to say she didn’t think what she did next. Blurting out a quick apology, she swiftly wrapped her arm around Eilidh’s mid section and lifted her off the ground. The flashlight shaking in her hand pointed everywhere but ahead, but Nicole knew to just get one step in front of the other as fast as possible.

Glowing eyes locked onto ones of the dead. Eilidh met that gaze in full, unbreaking—I’m a threat, leave me alone. Perhaps taking the hint or perhaps finding the action as a bluff, the creature returned to its half-finished meal. But instead of flesh, hair was the food of choice. Interesting. The large and impressive figure, the hair covering every inch, the selective diet. Why did this feel familiar? While the reciprocity was lost, she continued to stare, to watch. A thought started to form, a forgotten memory. Wiggling its way to the surface.

A grasping hand broke the recollection, slamming her back into reality, as the memory returned to the back of her mind. The sudden change left her momentarily disoriented; she moved to slap the offending hand on instinct. But a familiar voice came to her ears. Worry was clear in Nicole’s words, and for a moment a small pang of guilt rested in Eilidh’s chest for keeping her in this situation. Guilt quickly boiled into anger as her world turned topsy-turvy, body hoisted—unwillingly—onto Nicole’s shoulder. “Hey!” But the heated yell was cut short by the sight before her. The creature had entirely disregarded the body, choosing to pursue them instead. Usually if an animal discarded a meal, it was due to surrounding dangers, realization of spoiled parts, or a tastier option presented itself. The way the creature stared, as if trying to find her soul and judging her acceptable, at her and only her—it looked to be the third option. Sensation prickled down her spine. Maybe it was fear. But it was mostly excitement.

Feet crashed down onto the helpless ground. Hands reached out for her. Almost touching the strands of hair that whisked into view by the moving air. Before it could grab hold, the knife that still sat gripped in her hand struck out, hitting the creature on the palm. “No.” It let out a bellow. The other enlarged hand shot out, quicker this time. Tension riddling the fingers, whether preparing for an attack or preparing to attack. But instead of striking again, Eilidh slashed at her own hair. A few pieces detached, floated in the hair for just a moment. Until they were swallowed whole. Momentarily stalled by the action, the two were able to gain some distance from the pursuing animal. But the moment passed, and it snapped its attention back to her. In turn, she craned her neck back to look at Nicole. “‘Preciate the help but let me down.” There was no reason to drag Nicole into this. So, she started to wiggle out of the grip, but found the hold stronger than anticipated. Huh? Another attempt was made; more force was applied, but not much changed. A growl escaped her: a pinned animal. Kicking and scratching wasn’t off the table. 

The monster decided to follow them. Of course it did. Why would anything be easy when it could be a shitshow? Navigating an unknown part of the woods was never simple, even for Nicole who always seemed to find her way around the trickiest of forests. Doing so while giant feet made the floor shake underneath them sure added difficulty to the experience. “Stop! Moving!” Carrying Eilidh on her shoulder while she tried to fight the beast? really pushing it. And— why was she trying to fight the creature? Nicole didn’t know. Being stupidly reckless had to be a requirement for the job. The monster was hot on their tails, and judging by Eilidh’s roar it had managed to touch her. Why was it obsessed with her? She just squeezed the woman tightly and focused all her energy on not taking a false step, because it would be the end of them if she did. For some reason, the giant steps halted briefly and Nicole didn’t hesitate to twist between trees, making it harder for it to follow. Blood pounding in her ears, all she knew was that she had to keep going, until they reached ground even enough to run at full speed. Then she’d find the jeep she left at the entrance of the trail and they’d be safe. 

Initially she didn’t hear Eilidh’s complaint, her attention narrowed to one particular goal: escaping. It was only when she to wiggle her way out of her grip that her focus shifted. She huffed. Fuck that, if she was gonna run back to fight the beast, she wasn’t letting her touch the ground again. But as Eilidh twisted with more persistence she relented, forgoing any gentleness before she put her back down. She gripped Eilidh by the shoulders, standing tall to shield her in case the beast pounced again. “What the fuck were you thinking?” she panted harshly, but worried eyes scanned the woman’s hair. What kind of beast had that fucked up diet? “We need to warn—” at the distance, it was hard to miss that the creature was on the move again. What were they going to do? Wait and attack now prepared with a plan, or retreat? Her mind was made up, she wanted to go, but she was not going to leave Eilidh behind. She had the means to outrun the beast again if it came down to it. She met the woman’s gaze, regretting the words already forming in her head. “Whatever it is that you’re— that’s already going through your fucking head... it’s gonna include me, no matter how insane. So... all I’m saying is— really think about it”.

Wish granted, Eilidh was plopped onto the ground. But before she could turn attentions back to the pursuing beast, hands were placed firmly upon her shoulders. Pinned again. But a growl did not escape like before. It was tempted to, as Nicole’s sharp words greeted her ears, making herself sharp, prickly as well. “How ‘bout you–” But when she looked up, saw the worry in Nicole’s eyes, she couldn’t fuel the irritation for much longer. She paused for a moment—not sure how to answer the question. She had just been… reacting. And it was no time to try and come up with any form of reason. Thud, thud, thud, the creature’s feet banged against the helpless floor, tremors underfoot growing stronger as it closed the distance. Thuds like the tick of a watch, each sound indicating their time was running out.

Legs itched to run, to act, to no longer be stuck waiting and pondering, but that hold on her shoulder still remained. But it no longer acted as an anchor; with Nicole’s words, it became a link, binding the two together. Acting on the first thought that moved to the forefront—since Nicole insisted on involving herself—she placed the blade back against her hair. It cut into her braid, severing the end from the rest. With the secured ribbon removed, her hair unfurled, wild and untamed against her neck, and several inches shorter than earlier that day. She handed the detached braid to Nicole. “I’ll go left. You go right. Lead the fucker so far into the woods no one will see ‘em again.” She smacked her lips. “Hopefully.” The creature was reaching out for her again, two meters away, then one, then none. Before it gained a hold of her, she leapt back. In its momentum it stumbled forward, trying to make that sharp corner but long limbs prevented such agility. Not waiting for it to regain its footing, she turned to run, back amongst trees. “Keep ‘em off me and I’ll keep ‘em off you!” Her yell bounced off the trees, the only reminder of her presence as she disappeared into the darkness. 

Nicole was firm on her decision. She was not going to play hero again. She was not. She was n— except, even in the dim light she could tell that Eilidh was absolutely thinking about going back. Fuck. She flinched at her swift move, not expecting the woman to lift her blade again and slash her own hair. “Jesus, what—” she raised her hands to stop her, but she ended up grabbing her braid instead. Nicole stared at it with a blank expression, unsure on how to feel.  Thanks? She didn’t have time to process any of it, because Eilidh was talking again, this time to explain her plan. “You—you want me to…” brows furrowed, she waited in silence for more details, until she realized there was nothing more to the plan. It was short and straightforward. Confuse the fuck out of the beast. She would be doing her job, really. Keeping visitors safe by running the creature off. She understood then, the meaning of Eilidh’s hair in her hand: the scent would attract the creature to her, while her partner did the same on the other side. It was smart enough. At least they wouldn’t be trying to fight against it. 

She let out an exasperated sigh, realizing she was already convinced. There wasn’t certainty that the creature wouldn’t come back, lured by the scent of corpses, but if they could do their part to keep it as far away from the trails and the visitors’ cameras, it was worth a shot. The floor shook again and Nicole knew there was no time to discuss anything else. She watched Eilidh escape the creature’s grasp and take off in the opposite direction, following her part of the plan. All by herself, she wondered what was it about Eilidh's hair that made her so irresistible compared to her own. As they predicted, the giant monster went with its favorite. “Hey!” she called, lifting her hand and waving the braid. She took a few steps, preparing for a run, hoping it would be enough to get the beasts attention. Luckily for them, the creature stumbled and turned in her direction. Nicole had to keep the surprise to herself, jogging through the trees to keep the beast away from her colleague.  

Darkness began to envelop them again, the trees shielding the moonlight as they entered unknown territory. Even when Nicole could hardly see anymore, Eilidh’s light steps were easy to pick up in comparison to the rumbling caused by the beast. They just had to keep going— for how long? she wasn’t sure.

The creature was in pursuit, mirroring Eilidh’s pace step for step. But its gait was wider, legs a great pine to her samplings. The space between shortened with each thud of its feet, shortened even further as those desperate arms reached out. Just as fingertips grazed the hairs on the nape of her neck—threatening to close, caught in its trap—her own trap sprung. Nicole baited the creature her way, the same enticing hairs, her hairs, waving in the air. The creature followed. As the same fate began to fall upon Nicole, Eilidh beckoned it her way. It followed again. Back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. Delicious hairs always so close and yet so far. Equally compelled to chase both, it found itself somewhere in the middle: never able to meet, never able to feed. Eilidh stifled an amused snort as it came and failed once more to secure a hold on her. 

The darkness grew thicker, tighter. Sometimes it felt like she was stuck in an abandoned realm. A single dot in a sea of black expanse. The periodic calls of Nicole and the shake of the earth and the heavy breath from behind the only reminder there was more than just that small circle of trees her light illuminated ahead. Kept the darkness from becoming suffocating. That heavy breath grew labored, strained. The creature was growing tired of their game. It growled and snapped and barked out that strange call. But these sounds slowly grew distant. The space between them grew wider. Stubbornness and hunger forced it to continue, but feverish interest began to wane with its stamina. It would settle for anything. Now was their chance. “Throw the braid and let’s go!” Her direction turned, circling back to the beginning. Back to the light. 

It was pitch black. Nicole’s eyes darting in the dark desperate for any light. It was like running blindfolded and she wasn’t calm enough to use her other senses at best capacity. Not when they had a giant beast chasing them.  Blood pounded in her ears, knowing there was a solution. She could see in the dark, why wasn’t she doing it? Fueled by the adrenaline, she didn't have time for measured thinking, her temples burned demanding a switch. Amber eyes glowed in the dark forest, exposing the path in front of her. So much easier.  

Eilidh’s command reached her ears clearly, and Nicole didn't need to be told twice. She searched around, considering her options. She couldn’t imagine a braid traveling a long distance, instead she swung it upwards and prayed it would land on the top of the trees. The monster’s attention changed again, but she didn’t stay to see the results, as soon as the braid was released she turned, circling around the beast and heading back to where they came from. At least, the ground had stopped shaking. It was a good sign. She spared one last look behind her, just to confirm the beast was reaching for the top of the trees. Good. Maybe after the braid snack, the beast would settle for the corpses in the area, instead of following them back. She could only hope. 

With the threat gone, Nicole’s first thought was to switch back to her human vision. Eyes on the ground, she blinked fast and hoped for the best. The switch back was always a gamble. Sometimes she could get it down in seconds, other times required a lot more concentration. The fear she’d get stuck with those eyes was always present. That it would start with the eyes, and then the teeth, and then— fuck, now it wasn’t the time. She breathed out deeply, contracting the muscles her eye muscles. Only when it was pitch dark again, she slowed her pace, catching up with Eilidh on the other side. “Good plan...good plan” She breathed out, stopping herself in time before she did something stupid, like hug her. She really was relieved her colleague was in one piece. “Can’t complain about surprise cardio but—  enough for the night... I think. Can we... stick to the trails... from now on?”

Eilidh could hear footsteps approaching. But these did not shake the ground in their wake. These were fainter, friendlier, familiar. Her head turned, attention split between the trek onward and that steady advance. After a few moments, Nicole broke out of the darkness, into that circle of light. She smiled at the sight. “Good game!” She clapped an affectionate hand onto Nicole’s shoulder. Chuckle whistled out at her statement. “Sure thing.” As the excitement subsided, cravings twisted her stomach. And she noted the hints of exhaustion painted on Nicole’s movements, too. It was time for their departure. “Sounds like that Kera–” She blinked. Feet hesitated. “Kerashag.” Her hand now clapped against her face. While her conscious mind had been at work keeping her safe, her subconscious finally let that elusive memory slip out. Return to the surface. Sharing some enlightenment. It had been decades ago. It hadn’t even been her own tale. But she recalled a conversation with a zombie; one where she relayed her own incident with such a beast. A hair eater. A moth for death. It had harassed her just the same as the one Eilidh just faced. While the other woman was left with a bald head from the ordeal—she remembered how it glistened in the sunlight—Eilidh had managed to retain some of her hair.

“Fucking figures.” Eilidh mumbled under her breath. “Anyway. Sounds like they’re distracted. Let’s go before they want dessert.” Flashlight aimed at the ground, she scanned the surface for that change in texture. The light traveled across the grass, until the grass stopped, revealing dirt. Dirt that stretched onward into that darkness, until the darkness stopped too. Leading them back. She beckoned Nicole to follow as she hopped onto that trail, letting it return them to civilization.

It was reflex to smile back at Eilidh. The adrenaline was still coursing through her veins, she could bask in their success for a brief moment. It was nice, being helpful again. Even if the stakes were a lot higher than guiding someone through a trail. Nicole picked up on the hesitation, on the word that was uttered, but she kept her head down. She wasn’t going to ask. Not until they were back on the trail. She didn’t object as Eilidh voiced her exact thoughts. Better get the fuck away when their legs could still go.

The road back was understandably more quiet. Eilidh didn’t have time or energy for funny quips. And well, that was never Nicole’s thing. She did notice how her companion’s heart didn’t seem to be pounding like her own, though. Undetectable. It reminded her of her friend Griffin. She wished to be as cool under pressure as them. 

There were no more surprises for them on the way back, and soon enough they were back on the original path. Their vehicle had to be close. Nicole couldn’t wait to be back at the station. It was hard to erase the monster from her mind. She would’ve liked to shrug the experience off. Like she had in the past with other strange beasts. Just call them quirky White Crest things and roll with it. But she had to know, didn't she? She had to learn. Because the town was a dangerous place, and she couldn’t keep turning a blind eye. She didn’t want to get hurt again. She didn't want to lose more things. “So… kera what?” her voice broke the silence. She nudged back to the forest, where she first heard her utter that word. She decided to give the woman the option to pass on the question, giving a one shoulder shrug. “Sounded like you knew what the fuck that was, that’s all”.

The thrill of the chase waned, and in lieu of an ache—such a rare thing for Eilidh to feel—her legs grew heavy under her own weight. Hunger pricked at her stomach. The smell of that corpse like a phantom in her nose, calling her back with its intoxicating memory. But turning around would lead her all the way back to that and repeat the cycle all over again. Despite the logic, the temptation still bubbled inside her, and if Nicole weren’t near, she might’ve tried her luck. Who cares about being bald if it meant scoring an easy meal—perhaps meals considering the creature’s proclivities. But it was less fun utilizing such a method, and with that deciding thought, the urge went away. Her focus returned to the trail, to the station that waited for them at the end.

Eilidh chuckled into the crisp night air. “Kerashag. They eat–” Dead almost slithered from her lips, but she quickly bit into the word before it could manage. “–hair and nails. Don’t know much else ‘bout them. Beyond the nice example we just got.” Her head motioned to the darkness, to where the forest was ever vast, to where that creature still lurked. “Glad to be back on the force?” There was a genuine, albeit playful, curiosity in her question. But it also served as a distraction. 

The moonlight filtered through the trees with more intensity as they began approaching their starting point. It was a testament to how deep they ventured, that they still couldn’t see the lights from surrounding camping sites. Nicole glanced at her partner, noticing the exhaustion on her face with more clarity. Then, she noticed the mismatched length of her hair. For a blade cut it was pretty decent, she almost said out loud. “Kerashag” she repeated awkwardly, word foreign in her tongue. Her face wrinkled with disgust. So she wasn’t imagining the weird diet then. Why go for corpses then, and why was Eilidh’s hair more alluring? Should she be offended? “No Bigfoot... fucking knew it” she added, letting out a huff. She decided to ignore the rest of the questions forming in her head. She had a name, and that was enough for now. 

A laugh caught in her throat when Eilidh broke the silence. Her smile grew. The woman’s tone made her feel welcome. But as she processed the meaning behind the words, her expression began to falter. Nicole considered the doubts that filled her the moment the beast appeared. Her reluctance to investigate. The fear coursing through her at the thought of Eilidh getting hurt. She bit the inside of her cheek, stomach sinking with dread. It was probably too soon. Maybe she should’ve stayed doing office hours. That was it. That’s why she still felt shaky in the legs, right? It would probably take her some time to feel like herself again. “Yeah, yeah—” she cleared her throat, voicing her own conclusion. “Hoping for less action next time, though...still rusty” she spotted their vehicle at the distance, nodding her head towards it. They’d be back at the station soon, safe from what lurked in the woods. Safe from the questions she had to start asking herself.

[thepharaohisdead-longlivetheking]

Tagged by: @starcrossedking

Name: Alexa Age: 23 Pronouns: She/her Sexuality: Ain't no lie, I'm bi bi bi Zodiac sign: Aries Taken or single: Single pringle

Four Things About This Blog:

This doofus was a complete accident that came from a 4 AM hype conversation with @letsescapefromreality when I was struggling to finish a huge project and had accidentally thrown myself back into the fandom, originally we were just doing some Dragonshipping IM RPs but then she was just  "LET'S MAKE BLOGS" and, I the queen of no self-control and questionable decision making, went "YES"

Additionally, I never intended to go public, I was originally just going to RP with Tiffany as exclusives but when her muses died I really, REALLY didn't want to give up Atem so I started looking for one or two people to RP with because I had 0.0% confidence in my YGO writing and, at the time, was only looking to do D/S RPing (I've done that for years, it's a long story) and then somehow @begrudgingbabygoth found me and thanks to Bee I was able to venture out a little and weeeee here I am

If you go aaaaall the way back to the beginning of history you can actually see that I used to RP with gifs instead of icons, because that's generally what you do with live-action RPs and it's been YEARS since I've RP'd anime so I didn't really realize that people don't... tend to do that in anime fandoms xD I thought I'd hate going back to icons but I actually like it just as much as gifs, it's a little easier to find the right expression when the expression isn't moving/changing, it’s not as fancy but it’s easier

For a little wile I was actually doing well with keeping up with my replies but then that went down the drain, I promise though that I 1000000000000000% intend to get to everything I owe, I just really suck and had some issues lately with time stuff because of crunching for work

Three Mun Facts:

I write books for a living!

I'm a horror junkie and a fantasy junkie and I will rip out an organ and give it to you if you bring me some horror and/or supernatural/fantasy AUs, or hell, even canonverse! I'd freaking LOVE a canonverse supernatural thing, canonverse Bigfoot encounter YES!!

The first fanfics I ever wrote were for Yugioh (they were so bad *sobs* I was eight) and the fics I'm currently writing are.... also for Yugioh!! It's hilarious to me how age and being out of fandom vs being in fandom has changed my ideas, desires, beleifs, plots, etc about the series, I actually would have done more YGO fics by now probably if I wasn't trying to work on my Sterek Week fics because that's next month and hnnn I've finished NOTHING.... I run this event, I should be better than this xD I also have written/am planning to write more Teen Wolf, Supergirl, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Yuri!!! On Ice, and a few other things... if I ever get my shit together with getting the Sterek Week fics done

EXPERIENCE:

How’d you start: RPing in notes on DeviantART

Platforms you’ve used: DeviantART, Livejournal, Tumblr, Chatzy, Groupme, and whatever IM device I use with my freind Nicole at any given time

Best experience: So far, nock on wood, my YGO blogs here on Tumblr are by far my best experience

Worst experience: Some various other experiences I've had RPing on Tumblr, those are some LONG stories though

MUSE PREFERENCES:

Original or canon: Canon

Favourite face: Tyler Hoechlin, almost all of my OCs have his faceclaim, including the main blog this one is attached to, my favorite face to play against is Dylan O'Brien (any Teen Wolf fans will understand exactly what's going on here)

Least favorite face: I don't think I have any to be honest? I'm not the biggest fan of RPing with non-actors and musicians (so porn stars, social media stars, models, etc) because it's a little uncomfortable, that aside, I can't think of any specific FCs I have anything against

Multi or single: Both

WRITING PREFERENCES:

Plots or memes: I love both honestly!

Best time to write: At night

Do you like your muse(s): I love all of my muses, especially Atem, to be honest, I've never loved him more <3

How long (months/years?): RP in general, about ten years, on Tumblr, around... sevenish? I took a three or so year long break after my first RP blog flopped andd then got into it again with groups, before finally going back to indie

Fluff, angst or smut: Believe it or not I've actually done smut blogs for years (again, it's a long story) so smut and fluff, I'm really not a big fan of angst