#casually dropping dad trauma like holy fuck

[mitchmarner]

Me in theory: A weekly release of episodes is way better. The binge watching model is ruining the way we experience television.

Me when I actually have to wait another week for the next episode: What the fuck. What the fuck is this injustice. Where the fuck is the next episode of my program.

[11queensupreme11]

I've been having a brainrot upon rereading tsunami, what if the traumatized babies Essie, Hime, and Percy met? This is like pre-ror Percy so she's still a bit intact in sanity. I imagine their discussion goes like this.

If Essie, Hime and Percy meet:

Essie: and oh yeah, my dad is also crazy obsessed with me-

Hime: No way yours too?? *with sparkling eyes*

Essie: Yeah, he used a spell on me to uncover my memories and also saw my trauma *sweat drops* not fun times.. He also is convincing me to move with him and be isolated from the world.

Hime: ooh, yeah same! He kept me and my mom sheltered all my life. I only got out because of my teacher who turns out was also crazy obsessed with me.

Essie: *flashbacks to alabaster, cause he's like her teacher before* NO WAY YOU TOO??

Percy at the side having a terrified expression: what the fuck is happening in Y'alls worlds??!

-

Essie: So my current boyfriend ended up kidnapping me but I forgave him, he had to do it for crazy titan army *while drinking tea casually*

Percy, having a terrified expression: Ethan did WHAT?!

Hime, casually: oh my fiance tried to baby trap me

Percy, more terrified: WHAT?!!?

I'm just imagining them trauma dumping but it looks like they're trying to one up each other's trauma 😭😭 and Percy's like 'holy shit, not me tho stay safe yall' like percy, babe, your gonna experience that in the future but crank it up to 100 instead 😂😭😭

i love imagining percy just looking at these girls in horror and pity and going "WHEW! thank gods that's not happening to ME"

and then BAM, her life ends up being a hundred times worse than theirs cuz she experiences all that AND MORE!!!!! 💀

plus her yanderes are all-powerful gods (and a really really powerful 'demigod') so rip to her 😭

[yesyourstalker]

Mahi: thanks for coming with me man. You're pretty cool

Baja: Yeah it's no problem. So do we just knock on the- oh, you're just going to walk in? Okay that's not illegal....

Mahi: Oh please it's just Neta. He's not going to care...... I just need to see that picture. It can't be a coincidence it just can't be!

Baja: hmm you know I didn't expect his place to be sooo

Mahi: Nice? Yeah me neither... Seems like ikkan did some redecorating....a lot more purple

Baja: *gasp* is that ikkan's bass from the first squid squad tour?! The bass that started it all!?!?? Holy shit it is! It even has the little scratches from when he dropped it at camp triggerfish!! Oh my Cod!!

Mahi: yeah yeah so cool where would the picture be?

Baja: look they have Neta's introduction poster!!.."Neta, the bass player. This big guy is the notable newcomer of the group. His slap bass licks bring a bounce and funkiness to the songs that we know and love... don't let his cool and calm appearance fool you. This guy is wild and ready to party anytime, any day. He stands at a whooping 5'7 His favorite color is green. His favorite meal is a sweet and spicy lobster dog with a sugar free mango lemonade and his birthday is August 7th"....Cod It almost feels nostalgic

Mahi:..... It's not down here. It's definitely not in that brat's room...

Baja:.*ugh* look at the vinyl collection some of these are signed! No way!

Mahi: Maybe it's up in the loft in his room.... I'm going to be right back.

Baja: Holy shit! How the fuck did they get crippy chips's album is not even out yet?!? What does it say?...."For my future brother-in-law, I thought you would want the first copy of our album. does this count as a wedding gift? lol :⁠-⁠P" - Noji........... No way am I holding the first copy.... Ghhghhbgffh

Mahi: hay can you stop fangirling for a quick sec and come up here!

Baja: yeah I'm coming...... his room is pretty cool..... He has his bass mounted?! Did you know that bass has been on 9 tours. 4 squid squad and 5 diss-pair!

Mahi: yeah. No wonder it looks so beat up...... He did know my grandfather. Look! That's him. I know his face anywhere, even when it's not wrinkly. That's my grandpa Behi..... That kid he's with must be Neta..... He looks so small and.....frail.... How old is he in this......

Baja: oh he must be in the E ward..

Mahi: hm?

Baja: E ward is where they take soldiers who are affected mentally and emotionally. Most spend a year there and go back serving.

Mahi: that doesn't seem right... Did you ever-

Baja: I'm not telling you my trauma Mahi we barely know each other.

Mahi: that's fair

Baja: Give it a year.... Damn you gramps was admiral? Must have been a strong man

Mahi: yeah he was tough but really kind....*sniff* I really miss him.... How does he know Neta tho? How do I even bring that up to him?

Baja: he must have been a good guy.. Maybe you can slip it in the conversation now. Casually..... Is that a crabby!!?? He has his awards in a case!! Look he has squid squad's platinum records!!

Cirrina: those are only copies. The real ones are at ikkan's

Baja: aaahhhh!

Mahi: great

_______________________________________________

Candi: Mahi you can't just walk into Neta's place like this! It's wrong and you Left the door unlocked! What if something happened! What if someone walked in? what if his pet got out?

Mahi: nibbles is at ikkan's

Candi: you know what I mean! This isn't ok what if cirrina was here by himself. Two strangers just walked into her home when her dads aren't here. That's scary for a young girl.

Mahi: I don't know the little shit seems fine to me.

Cirrina: hi Baja heheheheh how are you doing today?

Baja: I'm good.......Your tentacles were fully orange last time I saw you. That's a unique color you picked. I like it

Cirrina:.... Heheheh he noticed! Hehehehe thank you!!

Mahi: see she's fine. Why are you here?

Candi: if you must know Neta asked me to take her shopping for her mom's wedding. They're leaving next month.

Mahi: I forgot about that

Cirrina: you want to see the tux I picked out?

Mahi: no

Cirrina: well it's a good thing I wasn't talking to you! Seeing how you dress, you wouldn't know taste even if it punched you in the face! I was clearly talking to Baja.

Mahi: mmmmm.... You're so lucky he's my boss

Candi: hehehehe I love her

Baja: I like the tux. Never thought gray and navy blue combination. That explains the silver tentacles and blue figures. Looks great!

Cirrina: hehehehehe thank you! You're too kind!

Mahi: oh barf

Candi: awww she has a crush.

Cirrina: you like music right Baja? I have my cello I can play it for you. I'm second chair in my orchestra and planning on attending a school for the arts. I'm actually playing at my mom's wedding. It's going to be an original song ikkan's helping me write it I-

Mahi: we don't care! we only came here to check something out. We're done now so we're bouncing. See ya Candi.

Candi: bye Mahi. Bye Baja

Baja: bye guys... This place is really Nice. It wasn't my intent to break in without his knowledge. I was just dragged into this

Mahi: let's go!

Baja: ok!.... Bye cirrina

Cirrina: bye!... Hehehe.... I think he likes me!

Candi: ah ha...*sigh* yeah .....hehehe... Sure.

@fish-at-fish-fish-resort saw Mahi drag Baja by his finn out of an apartment complex

[thewrongexecution]

thinkin’ ‘bout final fantasy

I go by Not The Author for exactly the reason that I ain’t no expert on any given work of fiction, but I do like to make connections what make me seem smart: an illusion, haphazardly crafted by incident accident and supplemented by precocious pretentiousness. All the same, here are some fun thoughts I had that you might also enjoy!

I do have a point, that I do get to. I feel like I should say that ahead of time, all things considered. Like, I can appreciate if you can’t appreciate a shaggy dog story? But there is a point to all this.

...Eventually.

Spoiler Warning:

Final Fantasies 1, 6, 7, 7R, 13 and 15

Content Warning:

Discussion of death

Cussin’

Length warning:

5621 words

13 sections

16 digressions

Let’s dig in.

- - - - -

Final Fantasy 1 was not my first Final Fantasy experience, but I think it was the first I ever played by myself? The remaster for the GBA, came bundled with FF2 on the same cart, which I played briefly but did not complete and do not remember, except that it had Cid.

FF1 doesn’t have a Cid, but I really loved the narrative anyway, straightforward as it was, because it was very specifically about spitting in the face of an uncaring god who would doom the world for a laugh. Take these chains that bind us to darkness and, though we be forgot to history, strangle with them that selfsame darkness to bring an end to its tyranny.

((it is a terrible curse, to love time travel. so many grand expectations, so few ever met. play ghost trick, chrono trigger, radiant historia, majora’s mask, outer wilds. have you any recs yourself, lemme know! I digress.

((I digress a lot, as I may have mentioned. they’ll be noted in parenthetical, like this.))

This is the foundation upon which Final Fantasy is built, and while any student of architecture could tell you of many and varied perfectly valid construction techniques, it resonates. Grappling with an immutable past to course-correct an uncaring future is, too, an apt description of personal growth; a theme as universal as being alive. And I, as an impressionable youth, ate that shit up.

((I assume I was young, at any rate. my love for time travel, be it era-spanning or moment-stretching, is, I suspect, not entirely coincidental to my terrible temporal memory.))

And that was the tale of the studio, too. Final Fantasy was so titled because, the story goes, the developers knew they would shutter if it didn’t make bank. Staring your imminent demise in the face, knowing your fate is doom, and giving it your all, all the same.

And then they made another twelve, plus two-and-a-half MMOs, and god knows how many mobile games and spin-offs, and now the Fantasy is that there could ever be a Final one. so say I: life parodies art.

((the half-an-MMO is FF14 1.0, which no longer exists and is a fascinating tale, a rally against bleak futures all its own. I’ll [link] Noclip’s three-part documentary covering the developer’s side of things, because that’s the one I’ve seen. there’s plenty other material to hunt down, though, if you wanna.))

- - - - -

Final Fantasy VII is a game about fate, too. Particularly Death, that most ultimate of fates. Tragic, to be sure; preventable, or at least delayable, in many cases; necessary, at times, for the growth of something new.

Unrelenting. Unstoppable. Inescapable.

Death, and the fights against it, take many forms. There are the fascist death squads that hunt down your ragtag band and any dissent against their cruel masters, but these will only truly stop by cutting off the hydra’s head and building an entirely new society; eight dudes and their dog, faced with a corporate private military, can survive but never win. There are such disasters as do slay that hydra, be they natural or man-made. There’s the space alien and the apocalypse it ushers. There’s literal illness and injury, physical or otherwise. There are the deaths of loved ones, friends and family, that lead to some subtler deaths within those that survive them. The deaths of relationships, by neglect or abandonment. The ideological deaths we inflict on ourselves, accepting ever-growing lesser evils in the name of some impossible ideal.

Every day, the person we were becomes the person we are, and soon, the person we are will give way to someone new, and this, too, is a sort of death. In this sense, we tally Cloud’s deaths at least five: failure to become a Soldier and rebirth in shame, the massacre of Nibelheim and rebirth in grief, arrival at Midgar and rebirth in delusion, his cratering at the Crater and rebirth in nihilism, and his death and rebirth in the Lifestream of Mideel.

((you could prolly hunt down another two if you wanna be cheeky, but I lack the knowledge, motive and patience. frankly, this whole thing is to create a leading line of logic and probably isn’t, uh. academically ethical? or whatever the term is. I’m not necessarily wrong, but I’m definitely scuttling nuance. oh well!))

Now, I say “rebirth,” because that’s how deaths of identity more-or-less work. There’s usually some new identity waiting in the wings to take over. And rebirth is itself a notable theme, inasmuch as it is one outcome of death. But death is oft more final than that, and what people do in its imminence and wake is key here, too. Wutai’s collapse into an insular tourist trap. Avalanche’s vengeful fervor, in general and post-plate drop. Bugenhagen trying to pass his knowledge on to Red. The whole party’s ongoing post-traumatic depressive episodes.

Ultimately, death is the inescapable fate of all things. It’s what we do, in light of that, that makes us who we are.

- - - - -

Final Fantasies 13 and 15 are the only modern Final Fantasies I’ve beaten, and I bring them up because both deal very prominently with fate and death, and as Square’s most recent mainline FF titles, Remake can’t exist without comparison to them. Here’s what I remember:

Final Fantasy 13 was a game I enjoyed. The stagger system mixed up my casual FF tradition of Get The Big Numbers by putting a prominent UI element onscreen that says You Can’t Get The Big Numbers Unless The Bar Is Full. Suddenly there’s a natural-but-enforced ebb and flow to combat built in, where you gotta juggle chip damage, survival, and crowd control while keeping resources enough to burst down a staggered foe, but maintain situational awareness to swap back into survival mode if you’re not gonna down your enemy, all in something close to real-time. Very obviously a direct precursor to the combat of Remake. I didn’t realize the depth of it, but it was still super fun.

People at the time didn’t like the linearity of the game and, I can see that in retrospect? I think it’s closer to, there weren’t breakpoints, there wasn’t variety. It was cutscenes, combat, and the stretches of land between them; the only real thing for the brain to get a workout on was the combat, and eating only one kinda food is gonna make that food taste bland.

((I didn’t mind, but I like idle games, and, also probably had depression around then. Take that how you will.))

The story, though, I loved. You got your uncaring gods forcing mortals to do their increasingly-impossible bidding, cursing them to agonized unlife if they take too long, and with blissful, beautiful death if they succeed. It sucks! And here you have a ragtag band of incidental idiots trying to rebel against a system that, actually, wants them to? Like that’s the plan? Have mortals kill god and summon the devil to destroy all life, because god, doesn’t.... like life anymore?

((The lore gets more than a little impenetrable, and I remember bouncing off it a couple times. The throughline of God Sucks And Makes Zombies was good though.))

The biblical parallels are obvious, and if they weren’t, the final boss’ design will clue you in, god that’s a good design. hang on I can add pictures and already tossed a spoiler warning, here, look at this:

(per the Final Fantasy Fandom Wiki [X])

That’s literally The Holy Trinity But A Sword The Size Of A Building. It’s perfect.

Anyway, I love this game, because the heroes win, which is what God wants, so in winning, they lose, as was fated to be, right? Fuck All That, say the lesbians from space australia, as they turn into satan and, as satan, stop God’s shitty metal moon from crashing into space australia and destroying all life.

((this awakened something in me, though, as is becoming a theme, I wasn’t aware of it at the time. actually hold up I’m gonna rewatch that sequence.

((yeah okay wow on review that was aggressively cheesy and had a whole bunch of weird emotional whiplash that just leaves a super-bad aftertaste. I don’t really like it as an experience, but big bazonga lesbian satan with arms for hair is still a look-and-a-half.))

The whole thing is not entirely unlike if meteor was also Midgar, and there’s more than a few points where I went, hang on, are they trying to evoke 7 here? “Lightning” is ex-military and bad at emotions, Sazh is a black dad w/ guns and emotional trauma and I love him, quirky pink healer girl who might be an alien is here, the game starts on a train and leads into a robot bug fight; obviously it’s not one-to-one but the connections are there for a brain like mine to make, and only more prominent for the fact that FF7 was the more satisfying game.

((I cannot speak to 13-2 or -3; 13-2 was fun up until the enemies were abruptly 30 levels higher than me, more or less a mandate by the game for me to do all the side content, which I was not on-board with. I skipped 13-3 entirely, especially when I learned the whole game is on a timer. did not and do not need that stress in my life.))

- - - - -

But okay, FF13 was “too linear” and wasn’t doing super great. Enter Final Fantasy Versus 13, by which I mean enter Final Fantasy 15 actually, we don’t need any more of this 13 crap. And once again, I enjoyed it! ...Right up until it was bad.

Final Fantasy 15 was not a finished game, and we know this for certain now, because all its DLC was to make it a finished game. At the time, though, there was uncomfortable and inconsistent story pacing, only one playable character, relatively sparse combat mechanics... but it was open-world, and hey, that’s what you wanted, right? open, non-linear environments? I picked it up because, Teleporting Swordsman With a Motorcycle Sword. I am of simple pleasures, and those are they.

Of the little I remember, one point that’s stuck with me is the sequence following the Leviathan fight. See, we’ve been talking about fate and destiny and how Final Fantasy likes to spite them. Here in 15, our main man Noctis doesn’t want the destiny he’s been burdened with, to Become The King and Save The World from the Coming Darkness, or whatever. He’d really rather be doing, anything else? like hanging out with his buddies or actually getting married or, I dunno, grieving the death of his father. Nope! You don’t get to do that. Go find the ghost armaments of your dead ancestors so you can ~saaave the wooorld!~ I would have been in college around then, so, eminently relatable.

Now, on this journey, you meet a guy called Ardyn. He’s the sort of character that was built as an attack on me personally: sleazy, charming, possessing airs of casual familiarity with people he’s never met, kinda helps you out in tight spots, and also, by the way, vizier to the empire that killed your dad and wants you and your friends dead too. But not in the “secret good guy” way, he just likes fucking with you! he’s perfect.

Right up until the Leviathan fight.

See, Lunafreya, your betrothed--

((I’m so mad about this stupid, stupid garbage. I love Lunafreya on principle, but the game doesn’t bother to give her screentime. you only ever hear about her incidentally, which can be cool if you then meet the character and get to compare/contrast what you’ve heard, but the initial release only has her show up for this one chapter, and your party doesn’t really get to interact with her that much.))

Your betrothed is here and she’s some symbol of the peoples’ hope, right? she’s got light magic or something, and can actually commune with the gods. the gods are on your side, but you can’t actually understand a word they say, but she can, and that’s sick as hell. anyway.

You lose the fight against Leviathan, because you’re a shitty emo teen who doesn’t know how to use your ghost swords, and she got beat up earlier when Levi got all pissy at being summoned. And then Ardyn shows up in his magitek dropship.

Now earlier, Ardyn had Luna as his captive, completely at his mercy, and right now, he who would be king of kings, destined to save the world from darkness, is clutching at rock in a hurricane, beaten, wounded and dying.

Of the two, which do you think he stabs to death?

if you thought, “the protagonist, which will allow him to win, and subvert Final Fantasy’s themes of defying fate by having the villain be the one to do it, forcing everyone else to scramble for some alternate solution and deal with the fallout,” congratulations! You win disappointment, because that idea’s cool as hell and they didn’t. fucking. Do it.

((Ardyn, before this, had given me major Kefka vibes, and thinking on it now, the world descending into darkness in the 15 we never had could have played with even deeper parallels to FF6... but I never played 6, and that FF15 doesn’t exist, so... I’ll leave that analysis to better scholars.))

now, with the benefit of hindsight, that was never going to happen. too long in development hell, game had to ship, had no time or budget for mid-game upheaval. but at the time? made me lose any interest I had in Ardyn, made me mad at the developers for passing up on fulfilling the themes their series had explored in past, made me almost stop playing the game. I’m still mad about it for crying out loud!

((thinking about it gets me tensed up, coiled, with that sort of full-body thrum that’s best conveyed with letters that jitter around. best I can do here is bold italics, but it doesn’t have the right energy. it’s a fleeting feeling, but when it’s here? god. given the men that wrote this scene I would fight all of them and win.

((inhale...

((exhale...

((and move on.))

We, the player, never really meet Luna, so there’s no real... impact, no substance to it. It’s sad, but impersonal. villain kills damsel to inflict manpain on hero. that’s it. we’ve seen this song and dance before.

But kill Noctis? The character the player’s been controlling all this time, who they know intimately? Now it’s personal. Now your party members’ grief is a mirror to your own. And now you get to play as Luna, maybe? give the game time to flesh her out, have her bond with your old companions over their shared grief, and maybe use her connections and public speaking skills to rally the people of the world, in a perhaps-vain attempt to resist the oncoming darkness, while simultaneously using that public-facingness to drive her to hide her own fear and hopelessness...? That’s a complex character ripe for drama and tragedy right there! And then her, at the head of a story about people coming together to solve a global calamity themselves, rather than await their appointed savior?

Even then, but especially now... You can see the appeal, right?

- - - - -

Lemme step back and zoom out for a moment, because there’s one more kind of Fate to discuss before I finalize my thesis. Yes, I promise, there is a point besides being mad at FF15, this is still ultimately about Remake. Bear with me a little longer.

See, Remake’s premise is that it’s not quite FF7, but that itself is predicated on Remake being essentially FF7. Certain things must be in the Remake series, or it will cease to be the Final Fantasy 7 Remake series. The developers have gone on record saying as much, that they’ll still cover the thrust of the original, and that makes a lot of sense from a development standpoint. Building on an existing framework saves loads of time, and lets them focus on details as they have in Remake.

((I think they've already set up an in-universe justification for this, too. The party may have defeated the Whispers at Midgar, but the Whispers are the will of the planet. The only way to truly defeat them would be to defeat the planet itself, which: kind of the goal of the villains!

((a bit ironic, because the villains are the Whispers’ means to keep manipulating events. Remake backends a very large portion of the plot, and I don’t think Rufus seeing the Whispers is a throwaway detail. The party chases Sephiroth by chasing Shinra in the original, so even if the party has shaken free of the direct influence of the Whispers, manipulating Shinra should in turn manipulate the party.

((on top of which, Rufus prizes power, and the power to change or control fate-- something both the party and Sephiroth have seized-- would be as enticing as anything.))

But this begs the question: How much of Final Fantasy 7 is necessary before it stops being Final Fantasy 7? Do you need all nine characters? The Weapons? Rideable chocobo? Breedable chocobo? What about locations? Can you drop the Gold Saucer? or Mount Condor? or Mideel? How many minigames am I holding up? These are necessary questions, but so is this:

“Would a one-to-one recreation of the original game have the same emotional impact as when it released, twenty-three years ago?”

- - - - -

Now, the phrase “emotional impact” is necessarily kind of nebulous and subjective, so lemme dig into that a little bit.

The first significant chunk of the original FF7 takes place entirely in Midgar, which is one huge city. Every screen is densely packed; movement is typically constrained to narrow corridors and industrial crawlspaces. The whole world is deeply claustrophobic and visually hostile, by design.

This is FF7 for the first few hours, before a motorcycle chase deposits you outside city limits, and then... you hit the world map, and everything changes. The world is rendered in three whole dimensions, now! (Then, a technological marvel in its own right.) There’s a sky! There’s a horizon! Grass, mountains, the ocean!

Boundless, terrifying freedom.

From a mechanical standpoint, there’s only one real destination, an A-to-B with random encounters before a small enclosure with an inn and shops, no real change from what you’ve already been doing. But the mood? Everything’s fresh and new, now. Everything’s an unknown.

So, how do we do that again, two-and-a-half decades on?

Let’s say, something like this: Remake 2 starts with Cloud and Sephiroth en route to Nibelheim. For new players, this provides immediate intrigue: why are these mortal enemies hanging out in a truck? how did they get here, where are they going? For veterans, it’s familiar: oh, we’re in the flashback sequence.

For both, it provides mechanical familiarity. We just finished last game hanging out in Midgar, a bunch of town squares with shops and cutscenes connected to hazardous corridors. Well, Nibelheim’s a town with shops and cutscenes, connected to a monster-filled anthill and capped with a reactor. We know this. We’ve done this. We can do this again.

And when the flashback ends, we’re in Kalm. Another town, maybe with sidequests this time; Midgar looming in the distant skybox as a reminder of how far we’ve come.

And then you leave Kalm, and the camera zooms out, and out, and out...

Remake is essentially 7, and you can’t have the impact of 7′s world map reveal if Remake isn’t functionally open-world too. Square has plenty of experience with open environments, however successful their more recent attempts have been; I’m confident that the have the ability, at least, to craft an expansive world that feels appropriate to FF7.

((I’d like to take a moment here to talk about FF14, which mixes both compact twisty dungeons and wide-open overworld zones, and is necessarily wildly successful to still be operating as an MMO... but though I have played it briefly, I don’t claim knowledge sufficient to go in-depth. The point is, Square not only can make a game like that, they have, and are, and apparently possess non-zero competency. I have worries, but I’m not worried, if that makes sense.))

So, can you recreate a given kind of emotional impact? Yeah!

Can scenes from the original Final Fantasy 7 be rendered into a new context, more-or-less as they were? Absolutely!

Would a one-to-one recreation of the original game have the same emotional impact as when it released, twenty-three years ago?

- - - - -

Aerith dies.

If you opened this post and didn’t know that, well. There were spoiler warnings up at the top, the game’s more than two decades old, and the spoiler itself is basically a piece of pop-culture, up there with space dad and wizard killer. There’re probably plenty of people who know next-to-nothing about Final Fantasy 7 except that Aerith dies.

Everyone knows because, at the time, it was so big a thing. This was a title that Square hyped to heaven and back to push JRPGs into mainstream western markets, and it worked. And this was before major death was so common and arbitrary as it is today; even now, Game of Thrones and its ilk are a relative rarity. The death of a protagonist or love interest wasn’t a new thing for games, or any media really, but usually you knew it was coming, or it served some purpose. Aerith’s death was sudden, arbitrary, you’re almost immediately thrown into a boss fight so you don’t even have time to process it right away, and it’s the first stone in an avalanche of other pointless arbitrary tragedy. It’s an obvious narrative setup for the endgame confrontation with Sephiroth; instead, Cloud has a breakdown, Meteor happens, and now there’s an entire Disk 2.

Fandom has always been fandom, even before the continuous immediacy of the modern internet, but... people wrote letters to Square, and got sad on message boards. There’s an entire subset of forum signatures, back when those were a thing, that you could sort as “people fucked up over Aerith dying.” And again, this was the world. Not just Japan, or Asia, but everyone.

((Or, everyone with the finances to have a PS2 and/or an internet connection. Gaming as a pastime remains way expensive, whether played or watched. But you know how it is.))

And that’s the problem with answering that question.

See, FF7 is a lot of things, but for better or worse, it is defined by Aerith’s death. It’s one of many factors, but you can’t... leave it out, right? or it wouldn’t be FF7 anymore.

Aerith dies in FF7, and everyone knows it.

- - - - -

But Remake has promised, repeatedly, that things will be different this time. Everyone is coming together to defy fate, and Cloud in particular is here to keep Aerith from dying. Bodyguard jokes aside, Cloud repeatedly has flashbacks (flashforwards?) to Aerith’s death and the events leading to it. When he meets her in the church, when they cross into Sector 6, twice in the final battle. Hell, the very first time they meet, Sephiroth taunts him about not being able to save her. Even from a metatextual standpoint, since everyone knows Aerith dies, that’s like, The Most Obvious Fate To Change.

If, after all that, Aerith still dies? It’s not just tragedy, at that point. That’s the developers, actively lying to the player about their intent in making this game series. That’s frustrating, and immersion-breaking, and when said death is likely to still have one or more entire sequels to come after? maybe not great for sales! I know I didn’t bother buying the complete edition of FF15; I couldn’t bring myself to care enough about a game that set up this cool possibility, and then just, failed to deliver on every count.

And, Remake is being made for two audiences. I’ve said “everybody knows Aerith dies,” but that’s not really true, is it? It’s been 23 years, after all. Remake could well be someone’s very first Final Fantasy experience. That’s why they’ve been telegraphing Aerith’s death so hard. Not everyone knows, but at least everyone can guess. Is it fair, then, to this new audience, with potentially no knowledge or understanding of the legacy of this flashy new action game, to foreshadow tragedy in the future, have everyone come together to say, We’re Going To Stop This, and then... not? Is that good writing? Is that satisfying? When this is a multi-game and potentially multi-console investment of time and money, is this, as a newcomer, a story you’d want to keep playing?

And then on top of that, it’s 2020.

I don’t mean that in the current-year-fallacy, “we’re better than this now” kind of way. Rather, the way I felt about Final Fantasy 15 is even more relevant now. People, in real life, are realizing that the powers-that-be are failing them, have failed them, have been failing them for far longer than twenty-three years. The people that already knew that are actually showing up for each other, to spite what felt and feels like inescapable fate and finding that, together, they might just be able to ruin God’s day.

Game development is, of course, its own whole beast, and projects in motion tend to stay in motion; deviating from a plan takes time and money that Square may be unwilling to spend. But, under current world circumstances: is making a game where the hero sets out to save one specific person from their fated death, and following that with a game where that one specific person dies anyway, aside from everything else, a good business decision?

- - - - -

So... Aerith, shouldn’t die, right...? But, FF7 requires Meteor, and so requires the Temple of the Ancients and the Black Materia. And, Meteor can only be stopped by Holy, so FF7 requires the Forgotten City.

FF7 is a tragedy. FF7 demands blood.

...Hey, actually, hold that thought. How come Cloud can remember Aerith dying in the first place? He’s not from the future, right? He’s got a connection to Sephiroth, who is from the future... and Sephiroth can manipulate his memories...? but, why would Sephiroth let him, or make him, remember that?

Hey, how come Zack is alive, but like, in the “narrative scope” sense? Wouldn’t his presence circumvent Cloud’s delusions about the Nibelheim incident?

Hey, how come Cloud had multiple big climactic Sephiroth confrontations at what’s essentially the end of the prologue, including one that mirrors the very end of the original FF7? Shouldn’t that still come at, like, you know. the end?

Hey, how come--

- - - - -

Remake has these... Callbacks? Refrains? Like my favorite, when Sephiroth throws a train-- you know, The Fate Metaphor-- at Cloud, who absolutely shreds the thing. Or, for a more direct example:

And it frequently uses these to show that people are changing, that things can change. You know, the whole Running Theme the game has going on.

Sephiroth gets a refrain, too.

At the start of the game (give or take a reactor), in his first real appearance, Sephiroth philosophizes at Cloud, makes sure Cloud hates him, and tells Cloud what he wants.

At the end of the game, in his last appearance, Sephiroth philosophizes at Cloud, tells Cloud what he wants, and makes sure Cloud hates him.

Structurally, these encounters more-or-less bookend the game; thematically, it doesn’t exactly indicate change. Barret may or may not have come around on Cloud, and his admission that Cloud is important to him after all is, itself, important. Cloud, on the other hand, was always going to defy Sephiroth. He stands resolute, now, ready to fight rather than flee, but apathy was never on the table.

Now, Sephiroth’s whole Thing is psychologically manipulating Cloud to get what he wants, and as part of that, what Sephiroth wants is usually not what he says he wants.

All throughout the original FF7, Sephiroth riled up Cloud so that Cloud would pursue and defy him, culminating first in the Black Materia incident, and then again in the Forgotten City. None of the Sephiroth clones could survive the trip through the Northern Crater, so Sephiroth had to lure Cloud, with the Black Materia, to him, and then also convince Cloud to give up the Black Materia of his own accord. Mind control, memory manipulation and illusions were involved, but if Sephiroth could maintain those indefinitely, he probably just. Would have done that instead. Way easier,

The point is, in Remake, in addition to all the intermittent retraumitization sprinkled throughout the game, Sephiroth goes out of his way twice to directly ask Cloud, “hey, you hate me, right?” And, as part of that question, he tells Cloud, “this is what I want.” And Cloud? He hates Sephiroth, and will do his damnedest to keep Sephiroth from getting what he wants.

So. What does Sephiroth... say he wants?

- - - - -

One last aside before we cap off: This post would not exist without the valiant efforts of one Maximilian_dood. His devotion to the series kept myself and many others engaged and excited and, frankly, hopeful, in the leadup to the release of Remake, and his correlations between the rest of the FF7 series and Remake were enlightening and entertaining.

and had he not the gall to identify defying fate as a device to make aerith’s death more tragic, I would never have been angry enough to write this.

((I know, I know. Gaming and streaming and lit analysis are all hard individually, and I don’t begrudge losing one for the other two. And it was a first playthrough! I might have seen these lines sooner than some, but collating all this info was certainly not instantaneous. And Square can be hack writers at times-- see again my rant on FF15-- so even then, I can’t discount the possibility.

((but, still.

((Really?))

So, while I would like to believe that I have, by now, made my thesis on Remake’s narrative direction abundantly clear, here it is spelled out anyway:

- - - - -

At the bottom of the Forgotten City, at the shrine on the pillar in the lake, Cloud will find Aerith, who believes her fate immutable.

Sephiroth will descend, and Cloud will sacrifice himself, that Aerith should live.

This is Sephiroth’s plan.

- - - - -

Hey, thanks for reading this far! With my conversational tone and rambling tendencies, I’d have preferred to make this an audio post or, god forbid, a video essay, but I got a keyboard, and that’ll have to do. Diction is important to me, as the capitalization, italics and use of punctuation may have clued you in on, so... maybe you’ll get a dramatic reading sometime in the future? but, don’t bet on it.

Feel free to riddle me with questions, or point out inconsistencies with this big ol’ thing! I’m not exactly an expert, and I’m sure I glossed over, heavily paraphrased, completely forgot, intentionally ignored and/or aggressively misrepresented some stuff, but I love learning and teaching esoteric bullshit about The Vijigams. On that note, anything that sounds like it should be sourced is sourced from “I heard about it on social media or in a stream or youtube video one time, but if I actually had to hunt it down this whole thing would never see the light of day, and it has already been like three months,” which isn’t to excuse my lack of due diligence, but I do, lack diligence, so, tough.

Oh! but the Remake screens all come from [here]. Don’t care much for that splash screen, but, I Get It, so, whatever.

There were some other things I wanted to touch on but couldn’t really find a spot for. FF7 Remake as a metaphor for its own development, for example. Or, some of The Possibilities, like how Cloud’s death could very literally haunt Aerith, or how Remake sets up a more fleshed-out Midgar revisit that Cloud’s death specifically would make infinitely sadder.

On that note, if it was not yet obvious, I love speculation, and if they do go this direction, it’ll probably be their justification to go completely... off the rails? Remake only has to be FF7 until it doesn’t, after all. If there’s some wilder implications youall see for like... I dunno, a Jenova more fully-regenerated from also having Cloud’s cells back, getting into proper Kaiju-on-Kaiju battles with the Weapons, or anything like that? Feed me your brain juice, etc.

And, once more, for the road: this is interpretation; subjective, opinionated, and very much in denial of any kind of author-ity. Nor is this a claim on how things should be, or an assertion that this would be good or bad. Everything ultimately rests on Square's narrative design team and, we’ve touched on them already.

((but, for your consideration: I’m smart, and right))

Here’s hoping, whatever happens, we get the game we deserve.

thanks for coming to my ted talk, have a great day

[carolunea-matea]

Mistletoe

A/N: Well this is my first time trying out a writing challenge.  And of course, I take on a 12-part challenge. @like-a-bag-of-potatoes and @thing-you-do-with-that-thing are running Kari and Ida’s 12 days of SPN Christmas.  This is day seven. Mistletoe

“I’ll see you tonight at the party?” Jade asked me as we were pulling our coats on, getting ready to leave work.

“I don’t know. I hate going to these things dateless.” I shrugged.

“Oh, come on! It’s going to be fun! Maybe you’ll meet someone!” She wiggled her eyebrows making me laugh.

“Maybe…” I really didn’t have anything else to do.

“Look, Sam’s big brother just moved to town. I’m sure he doesn’t have any plans tonight. Let me text Sam and see if Dean is up for the party tonight. If he is, I’ll tell him to pick you up at your house around 7:30. Worst case scenario, you end up with a new friend and we get to spend more time together!”

“A blind date? Really, J?” she was already texting Sam. I rolled my eyes.

“He’s related to Sam, Carebear! Practically raised him! He can’t be that bad! Sam did graduate from Stanford with honors after all.”

She had a point. Sam was a great guy. This couldn’t be that bad.

“Yes! Dean will be at your place at 7:30! I’m so excited! I ‘ve been wanting to set you two up since Sam told me he was moving here!”

I just shook my head and laughed.

“Well now I have to go get all cute and shit. Thank god this is a dressy casual thing. I don’t think I could handle having to get all decked out tonight. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

We waved good bye as we headed for our cars.

 By the time I got home it was almost 6 o’clock. I jumped in the shower after pulling out my dark skinny jeans, a burgundy sweater, and a dark green top to so underneath.

It was almost 7 by the time I had my hair dried and curled, makeup applied, and was running around my house looking for my knee-high boots. I had finally found them when my doorbell rang.

“Coming!” I yelled as I hopped down my hallway pulling on my left boot. I knocked into the table I dropped my mail and keys on every day.

“Ow! Fuck!” I was still rubbing my hip as I opened the door.

There before me stood an emerald eyed, dark haired, drop dead gorgeous man.

“Hey, you must be Caroline. You ok?” He was smirking obviously having heard my run in with the table.

I laughed, “Yeah, the table just attacked me is all. Nice to meet you. Come in. I still have to get my coat.”

He walked in and shut the door behind him. I led him to the living room and told him to make himself at home.

“So, you and Jade work together at the hospital?” He asked as I dug through the closet looking for my leather jacket.

“Yeah. She’s one of my techs in the main pharmacy. We’ve worked together for, wow for five years now. I actually remember when she met Sam. She was like a school girl! Couldn’t wait to talk about every date they had.” I chuckled at the memory.

“Yeah, Sammy would call me after every date, too. She’d a good woman. She’s good for my brother.”

“Sam’s a great guy. J told me you practically raised him. You did a good job.” I had just pulled on my burgundy hat and match gloves and was buttoning my short leather trench.

“Thanks. Dad was on the road a lot. Mom, she passed when Sammy was six months old. Our Uncle Bobby watched us a lot, but yeah. We pretty much only had each other.”

I grabbed my purse, “Ok, I’m ready.”

“Let’s party!” Dean joked standing up and opening the door for me. He offered me his arm with a goofy grin on his face.

“Why thank you, kind sir!” I teased in a southern belle accent.

We laughed as we walked to his car. My jaw dropped.

“Holy Shit! A 67 Impala? She’s beautiful!” I walked around his car impressed.

“A woman who knows her cars. Nice.”

“Not all cars. But this, this is my dream car.” Dean was opening the passenger side door for me. I got in and rubbed the dash and the seats before pulling on my seat belt.

“This is my Baby. She was my Dad’s. When he passed, I got her.”

Dean had just bought his own mechanic shop. We talked about cars, my job, how cute Sam and Jade were together. All the random first date stuff. We were laughing about our favorite episode of Friends when we pulled up to the bar the Christmas party was at. Sam and Jade were just arriving as well.

“Well look at you two, laughing and getting along,” Sam teased and Dean opened my door for me.

“Hush, Sammy. Respect your elders!” I teased right back.

“Oh God, you’ve already started telling her stories, haven’t you?” Sam glared at Dean while I gave Jade a hug.

“Oh my God! How did I not think about that? Dean, please! You have to!” I gave Sam a hung before spinning around to look at Dean.

“Oh, there are tons of them! We have all night. Let’s get inside and get drinks. I hope there’s pie.” Dean grabbed my hand and led the way into the bar.

My co-workers called out to Jade and me with a chorus of “Merry Christmas”.  We said hello to everyone and I introduced Dean around.

“What’s your drink?” Dean asked in my ear so I could hear him over the noise in the bar. I got chills.

“Captain and Diet and a shot of Patron.”

“Coming up!” Dean and Sam walked to the bar to get the first round of drinks. As soon as they were far enough away, I smacked Jade’s arms.

“Dude! You didn’t warn me about how hot he is!”

She laughed.

“Well what did you expect? He’s related to Sam.”

“Fair point. But, my God, those eyes!” I fanned myself to further my point.

We pulled off our outerwear and hung them on chairs reserved for our party as Dean and Sam walked back with our drinks. We drank to Christmas and family with our shots and settled in to our seats.

“Ok, everyone! We have our food to the left and we’re going to start karaoke in about twenty minutes. Solo, duets, and groups are all welcome! Let’s have some fun tonight!” The head nurse of the hospital’s trauma center, Meaghan, announced.

We all cheered as people started going to sign up.

“Santa Baby?” I asked Jade. It was a sort of tradition for the two of us to perform the song together.

“Absolutely!”

I told them I’d be right back and went to sign us up.

“You guys carrying on tradition?” Stephanie, one of the trauma nurse’s asked.

“Of course!”

“Who is that guy you walked in with? He’s fucking hot!”

“Dean. He’s Sam’s brother and just moved into town. J fixed us up on a blind date tonight,” I explained, taking a large sip of my drink.

“Good luck!” Steph said while nudging me with her shoulder. I laughed as I walked away.

Back at the table, Jade and Sam were smiling widely while Dean shot a dirty look at them.

“Whoa! What did I miss?”

“Oh nothing,” Jade responded, not making it sound like nothing.

I shrugged it off and sat back down.

Two and a half drinks later, Jade and I were called up to do our song.

“Now up, your favorite duet in the pharmacy and at the Christmas party, Caroline and Jade!”

Our group cheered and Sam and Dean threw in a couple cat calls.

Jade and I laughed our way to the stage.

Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree for me Been an awful good girl Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Jade began the song giggling.

Santa baby, a '67 Impala too, dark blue I'll wait up for you, dear Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

I sang, walking toward Dean, shrugging at the color of the car, shooting him a wink. We were now standing in front of Sam and Dean and pulled them to the stage with us.

Think of all the fun I've missed Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed Next year I could be also good If you'll check off my Christmas list

We alternated the lines. Circling the men while we continued.

Santa baby, I want a yacht and really that's not a lot Been an angel all year Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa honey one thing I really do need, the deed To a platinum mine Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa cutie, and fill my stocking with a duplex and checks Sign your 'x' on the line Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight

Come and trim my Christmas tree With some decorations bought at Tiffany I really do believe in you Let's see if you believe in me

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing, a ring I don't mean on the phone Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight Hurry down the chimney tonight Hurry, tonight

 When we finished, we turned back to the guys to see Sam down on one knee. My jaw dropped as I turned my face to look at Jade, who had dropped her microphone. I slowly walked to stand next to Dean.

“Jade, we’ve been together for four years. I don’t want to spend anymore time not being your husband. Will you marry me?”

The room had fallen silent. Our co-workers all holding their breath waiting for Jade’s answer.

“Of course, I will,” she replied in a barely audible whisper.

“She said Yes!!” I screamed jumping up and down in excitement, tears streaming down my face.

The room erupted in applause while Sam slipped the ring on Jade’s finger before they kissed.

They were the talk of the rest of the party. Everyone congratulating them and hugging the couple while we were dancing.

Dean and I walked over to the food table and began filling our plates. We were about to head back to our table when I heard Sam yell, “Hey Dean! Look up!”

We both looked up to notice we were standing directly under a mistletoe.

Dean smiled taking both of our plates and putting them on the table. He placed one hand on my hip and the other on the back of my head.

“I’ve been waiting all night to find an excuse to do this,” he whispered against my lips before kissing me.

I could feel myself blushing as I stood on my toes, my hands traveling behind his neck.  His lips parted and kissed me deeper.

It wasn’t until I heard the cat calls from my co-workers that I slowly pulled away blushing bright red.

“I am so glad Jade talked me into coming tonight.” I was grinning ear to ear.

@idk-wtf-is-happening (Merry Christmas, Darling!)

[stimmypaw]

stimmypaw reads Shattered Sky, a late tumblr post

I just, forgot to post this for some reason. It’s me writing my thoughts on the third book of A Vision Of Shadows, I also did that with the first and second ones! Very full of spoilers, enjoy!

Omg.....meet Darktail's Kinnies... someone should name their wc kin server that its a great name, most of them seem to have wc names tho I thought he was a whole gang?? Did more of them get wc names or have already than we knew???

Oh no I barely got to see echosong :c I hope the others are okay, frecklewish is a wonderful name

Chapter one they already have all of the clans going 2 fight???? This absolutely won't go well and that terrifies me

Onestar realized Darktail has a beautiful voice :/ and he feels bad battling him /j

Yup just as I expected, awful loss. Plus Twigpaw was sure her sister was gonna kill her which killed Me

Alderheart parent mode

YASSSS ITS TIME FOR SKYCLAAANNNNNN

obviously the clans are pissed why the hell did they have this as a secret bro!!! why?? bramblestar was just ashamed now firestar???? bro WHY i seriously need to read firestar’s quest I just don’t get it

scenes of elders being cared for by apprentices is always so comforting, seeing it being interrupted and taken from violetpaw feels awful

WHO THE FUCK IS THISTLE he isn’t in the allegiances??????????????????? HELLO ah okay the rogues are showing up slowly ok

Violetpaw did a u-turn to her character here it seems?? She didn't find the elders were lecturing her at first, was Darktail's lil speech about how she was brave enough to convince her they are wrong??? A few compliments couldn't possibly be enough for that. Plus again she is seeing Darktail brutally murder someone and how despite seemingly treating each other nicely these cats are ready to betray each other anytime. Surely this would be enough for her to feel like the elders are still right and she can't trust these cats???

Hope she doesn't start seeing this violence as normal

I'm so sorry for blossomfall I can't believe she got with thornclaw of all cats

LIONBLAZE JAYFEATHER CINDERHEART AND TAWNYPELT, ALL JUST CASUALLY LISTENING TO GOSSIP. ABSOLUTELY SCANDALOUS I LOVE THEM

I love like how the book will take breaks every now and then to show for a millisecond ivypool being mad at tigerheart or vice versa and dovewing looking at tigerheart or vice versa and have the POV go "wonder what thats all about" and just proceed with the plot. Wonderful

Twigpaw :c

"A "mrrow" of welcome" has got to be my favorite line on this book

The cats complain there's already enough plots going on.

Whitewing is a very nice background cat and I appreciate her. But God Omen of the Stars only proved Starclan is just a bunch of old dead cats and that can be both good and terrible. Her argument is needed tho.

The others have a point tho, how can they leave the clan with less cats right now? I guess they would come back with more but what if they're not strong enough to defend themselves? A lot of trouble could happen with Skyclan coming as is to the territories and its understandable for the cats to be concerned

Violetpaw and Needletail cope with trauma as best they can and thats not a lot

I hope Violetpaw at least realizes how fucked up it is that they are scared of their leader who is supposedly their kin and the one who they should be the most loyal to

Oh Boy kittypets!

I love kittypets so much they're always fun. Darktail is so creepy tho I read some quotes he said to my girlfriend and she said he sounded like GLaDOS and yeah he's creepy I can feel it without Violetpaw agreeing with me that she's scared of what will happen next. Where did Darktail get that blood thing????

I like Zelda. She seems to be Violetpaw's age I hope she is so they can kiss. ALSO THIS IS KINDA LIKE MENTORING??? Violetpaw should get a warrior name

TWIGPAW PUT A PILLOW UNDER HER BLANKET SO NO ONE WOULD NOTICE SHE LEFT AHAHAHHA I bet she went to find Skyclan didn't she

PURDY

NOOOOOOO PURDYYY NOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

my gf said indigestion can sometimes have those effects on a cat if its really bad i didn't know that

PURDY CANT BE GONE PLEAS

I am SO sad I knew this was coming and I hated it terrible awful

I never saw a vigil so sweet. We Are All Love Purdy.

OH RIGHT TWIGPAW GSGWHAHAH

I appreciate no one is annoyed or pissed theyre all just worried, I am too

Apparently Alderheart and Bramblestar disagree lot? They seem to get along great though. And uh I guess Bramblestar doesn't always take his advice but, that doesn't mean much they like talk about stuff and Bramblestar forms conclusions taking in consideration the stuff his son said and all. Idk, feels like a weird statement Twigpaw something tells me the Erins are failing to send a message somewhere

Fuck I hope someone finds twigpaw soon, her adventure has been fun but I'm terrified for her

Violetpaw seems to be having a hard time too, not only is everything awful and terrible plus we had a time skip of a few days so who knows what happened to Twigpaw. Anyways Violetpaw having to care for Needletail like a mentor is like a young teen having to care for a young adult's mental health and that always sucks for the kid, there's not much else that can be done though Needletail probably doesn't want to worry

Violetpaw :C

This is so sad and terrible, I wish Violetpaw could be with Twigpaw right now she wouldn't be starclan knows where if they were just together!!! I hope the other cats don't start saying nonsense about Violetpaw now. She's scared she won't be accepted in Thunderclan and doesn't see herself as worthy of acceptance, and feels responsible for her older friend. I'm :CC

PAGGDHAHAHA Zelda is a trash cat and I love her

Violetpaw is suffering so much and Darktail is absolutely brainwashing her ass and she can't understand how he is to blame for everything.

Oh boy when she does.

This is such a good story God im like very tired and in need of sleep but I can't stop reading

Oh God so much has happened, this is so terrible, I love that Mothwing and Alderheart are hanging out tho I forgot what a fun character she can be!!!

Thinking about how so much would be easier since book 1 if Onestar agreed to lend a helping paw. Thinking about the begging dying bodies piling up at his door. Thinking about onestar.

Oh scratch what I said earlier guys WHEN VIOLETPAW FINDS OUT DARKTAIL KILLED DAWNPELT OH BOY

Its terrible knowing dawnpelt isn't there and like, so far thinking she was in thunderclan, only to have thunderclan cats wonder if she's in shadowclan like oh God oh fuckle this is IT

I feel so bad for Loki and Zelda :c I would give them treats

What the fuck Darktail

Holy shit Darktail

I am noticing like, cats making seriously spot on assumptions of things that happened out of small information and idk if that really isn't realistic and just a way to make cats realize things or if I'm just too autistic to relate

I'm so glad the medicine cats treat anxiety. Last time I remember that happening was the prophecy begins but I might be forgetting somethin

The fear these cats have of the clans ending feels so real I am absolutely terrified for them and I love it

It doesn't make sense for twigpaw 2 die so I'm not buying it but wow this hurts

Violetpaw time

I am itching for them to find skyclan so bad

Violetpaw you're not Squirrelpaw or Leafpaw in the new prophecy you wouldn't have felt if Twigpaw died :P

Bro Needletail :c I miss when she was a wild free creature

This prisoner smuggling deal is so fun I am absolutely excited about everyone's plans, it can't all go well so soon though.

TWIGPAW YESSSS BABY I MISSED YOU

Twigpaw lactose intolerant moment

omg she had a vision

Vision cat be nice 2 my baby she is dying

TWIGPAW FOUND SKYCLAN YESSSS YES YES YES

OMG......HAWKWING.....AAAAAAA THATS HER DAD BRO SHE FOUND HER DAD IM YESSSS YEAYESYESYEYD

This is so good im so happy

This is so awful I'm so sad WHERES THE CLAN CATS they were supposed to show up when they were asleep right????? Fuck!!!

This is so scary

NEEDWETAIL IM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Violetpaw definitely could have used a better friend at times, but God was Needletail good im so sad

Bramblestar: alderheart we need a point of view from thunderclan of what's happening so you're coming to the battle

OMG THEY DID IT!!!! I DID NOT EXPECT THAT WROW VERY NICE

Oh this is so exciting, how will they get Windclan back????

Twigpaw baby you always had your place here

I think they should both go to Skyclan but I understand if Twigpaw is indecisive she has always had a good life in Thunderclan.

Nononono Rowanstar, Scourge is the villain from the The Prophecy Begins here, your guy is named Darktail

Ominousnestar

I have been vaguely spoiled about Onestar being related to Darktail but I have no clue how

I can see Onestar's, Smoke's and Darktail's designs rotating in my mind its beautiful

I'm loving this story this is so cool

You dare challenge the warrior cats Fandom?

SKYCLAN, DROP YOUR CATS

RIVERCLAN, GET THE BUCKET

WINDCLAN, GRAB YOUR LEAFBLOWERS

THUNDERCLAN, GRAB YOUR LIGHTNING RODS

SHADOWCLAN, IDK MAN SAY BOO OR SOMETHING AHHAHA

I'm glad this is the prophecy this series really is Tumblr vs 4chan

Oh my god

This is so surreal

What an astounding battle wow and what an ending

I loved it

That was so so good

Everything here was fantastic, looking back its hard to believe they managed to fit so much plot into one book and like the pacing was Very Good this was just good writing wow? The development of Darktail, everything with Onestar, very fun I was on the edge of my seat through the whole thing it was incredibly fun. I’m very excited for what’s to come too, I worry it probably won’t be as fun and exciting as this since they already got rid of the biggest threat, unless they get another, but still like I really wanna know what’s gonna happen with Skyclan! And Violetpaw and Twigpaw!!!! How will the clans cope with all this loss and receive a new clan in the territories??? There’s a lot of good build up that I don’t know if it will live up to all that happened so far, but I think it can be very good and I’m excited, lots ahead of us!!! Oh boy!!

[the-inkwell-variable]

My first official fluff piece! Still kinda angsty, but it's cute - to a point lol

I'm so sorry. I cannot figure out how to add a read-more on this new formatting.

--------

Coming up with excuses to hang around the engine room was getting harder every day. Delivering messages for people was always an easy bet - the priest couldn't be bothered to crack his old knees on those stairs anyway - but the stupid crew on this stupid ship didn't send messages to the resident tinker very often.

She could always break stuff.  Parvati was always down to fix it, and whenever someone brought her some broken trinket, she got the cutest expression on her face - a weird mix between excitement and exasperation.  All of her shyness just completely vanished as she scolded them for being so careless with their things, revealing the true bullheaded nature behind her stammering, eager-to-please front.

But how long could she keep "accidentally" breaking her stuff before Parvati confiscated it, just like she did Felix's mechanical tossball action figure?  Not much longer, that was for damn sure.

And she couldn't just... show up and linger. What excuse would she use for that?  "It's too loud out there"? The engine room was way louder than the rest of the ship combined - even when Ellie and Vicar were screaming about philosophical bullshit in the cafeteria and Felix had his tossball match turned up to drown them out. Besides, she had soundproofed her bunk specifically to give herself a quiet space.

"I'm interested in mechanical engineering?" Ha! What a laugh. Every single person on the Unreliable knew that Nyoka didn't give two shits or a fuck less about fixing her own belongings, as long as she had the bits to pay someone else to do it.

The only option left was honesty, and let's face it: that wasn't her strong suit. She had a reputation as a badass (if constantly drunk) bounty hunter to maintain. Confessing that she enjoyed hanging out with the dorky engineer made her sound like a lovesick puppy - which she wasn't, for the fucking record. She didn't like Parvati like that. She just like getting the girl the ramble about her favorite topics, watching her face crinkle in concentration as she struggled with a complicated mechanical part, the way her face turned out a particularly off-color joke. There was no love there, and she'd sock anyone in the mouth that would even dare to suggest such a thing.

And yet, Nyoka still found herself lingering outside the cafeteria, sneaking furtive peaks at Parvati.  Look at her. Nibbling that snack cake like she's a baby sprat. God, she's so freaking adorable...  She turned away, her lip curling in a sneer of self-disgust as she took another drag from her flask. Even the rough burn of old whiskey couldn't drown the way her heart pounded against her chest.

God, what had this quiet mechanic from Edgewater done to her?

She didn't even realize that her feet had carried her into the room until she looked down and saw Parvati staring up at her. Her lips were smiling that tight-lipped smile that all polite folks gave when unexpectedly bumping into someone they barely know, but her eyes were confused, maybe even a little frightened. She hated that look. She wanted to grab the girl's shoulders and shake some common sense into her, to scream "Why are you afraid of me?! I'll kill everyone on the ship and myself if it would protect you!"

But she wasn't that dense. That would just scare the poor girl more, and the very thought of Parvati fearing her turned her stomach. Instead, Nyoka twisting her own lips into a smile and forced out, "Hey there, tinker. Didn't mean to scare you."

Parvati quickly shook her head in an obvious act of self-preservation. "Oh, not at all, Miss Nyoka! I was, um, just eating a quick snack. Got to stay fueled for the road!" She giggled awkwardly, and Nyoka wanted to wrap her arms around her and squish her tight - though whether it was to comfort her or to squeeze out the anxiety, even she couldn't say.

"With empty calories like that? You're going to burn through it and crash in an hour."  She strolled to the refrigerator, forcing herself to tame her trademark stomp to a casual strut. "What's the thing Junlei says all the time?  'Treat your body like a machine - quality fuel and plenty of rest, or you'll end up rusting like an overworked engine.'  I don't know anything about machines, but it sounds right. Here."  She tossed a small container of food to the confused girl.  "Cystipig stew. Homemade. It's something my - one of my old teammates used to make. The methane added a kick, but Boss says I'm not allowed to flood the kitchen with explosive gas."  She scoffed as she dropped into the chair across the table.  "Coward."

Parvati let out a soft laugh escape as she tentatively scooped out a spoonful of stew, and Nyoka's heart fluttered in her chest in a way that was surely heartburn and nothing else. "I can't imagine methane making anything taste better... Except maybe mantisaur. Is it true that people eat mantisaur on Monarch?"

"Only if they're really desperate. As in, 'I've already eaten the floorboards and my roommate' desperate."

Parvati's spoon hovered before her mouth as she shot Nyoka a part-horrified, part-rebuking glance. "You shouldn't joke about such horrible things. People suffer through terrible hardships - it's cruel to make fun of them."

The urge to retort was powerful. She wanted to snap back that, as someone who spent years as one of those people, she could say whatever she damn well pleased about the subject - that according to Holy Man DeSoto, making jokes about the subject was 'an ingrained coping mechanism that helped her deal with her trauma' or whatever. But - and she could not for the life of her understand why - she kept her mouth shut.

Parvati stiffened to brace herself for the inevitable backlash, but when none came, she relaxed just enough to taste the offered stew. Her eyebrows shot into her messy brow. "This is really good! You said that your former teammate made this?"

"She - created the recipe, yeah." Nyoka couldn't meet her gaze, not what the lump growing in her throat. "That's not important though. You really like it? Even without the methane?"

"It's delicious. It tastes like - oh, what was it dad used to say?" She scrunched her face as she wracked her brain, and the lump in Nyoka's throat dissolved like sugar. "Tastes like Grandma used to make. It's homey and warm, like curling up in a freshly made bed after a hard day of work." She took another bite and closed her eyes, chewing slowly as if to relish every bite. "Mm... I can see why you treasured that teammate. If her personality was anything like her food, she was a really amazing person. "

Nyoka shook her head as she gazed at Parvati, her lips twitching into a rare genuine smile. "God... You're so nice. I... I want to kiss you."

Parvati's eyes drifted open to focus on Nyoka's face. "What did you say?"

Nyoka stared back, frozen in place as her stomach clenched tightly. Oh God - what to do? She couldn't admit what she just said! But what to say?

Parvati sat up straight now, her head tilting ever-so-slightly. Her bottom lip jutted out to give her an adorably confused pout. "Nyoka?"

And now she was taking too long to respond - fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck - In a panic, Nyoka blurted out, "If you died, I wouldn't miss you!"

They both froze, staring at each other - Nyoka in horror, Parvati in confusion. As the gravity of her panic response settled upon them, Nyoka clenched her fists under the table. Her face burned with shame while Parvati's face paled beneath her dusky complexion. Tears began to collect in her amber eyes, and she turned her head down and away. "I - I see. I'm sorry for whatever I said that made you feel that way, Miss Nyoka." She pushed the chair back and stood up, her hands trembling at her side. "I'll just go."

"Parvati, no -" Nyoka reached out instinctively then snatched her hand back. "I didn't - that's not what I - God damn it!" Slamming her fists against the table, she threw her chair to the floor in her haste to get up and storm from the cafeteria.  You're not running away, she assured herself as she locked the door to her sleeping pod, longing now more than ever for the ability to slam the door with a satisfying bang.  You're taking a step back to collect yourself and figure out what you're going to say to fix this.  She punched the door and spun to slide the ground, leaning against it and feeling, for the first time in her life, like a serial character. "Fucking hell, Nyoka..." she muttered as she pinched her brow between her fingers.  "You're really in the shit this time. You and your fucking mouth... "

It took an hour and several gulps from her flask to calm her nerves and figure out exactly what she was going to say, but finally Nyoka was ready to tackle the hardest battle she'd ever had to face. Taking a deep breath (and another swig for courage), she opened her door and walked to the kitchen. It took every ounce of self-control she had to keep her body still. Treat this like capturing a raptidon, she encouraged with every step.  Don't show fear. Never show fear. You're the baddest bitch on Monarch. They make fucking serials about your adventures. You can handle apologizing to a dorky girl from a hick town.

Despite her totally awesome pep talk, she still had to pause outside the cafeteria and rest her forehead on the cool door frame.  You can do this.  Deep breath. You know exactly what you're going to say. Just go in, stay on script, and get out. No ad-libbing. You want this to be another Angeline Graves situation?  'course not. All right. Countdown. 3. 2.... 1.

Inhaling deeply, Nyoka pushed open the door and stepped inside. "Parvati, I -"

She stopped short as a sob interrupted her and allowed her blurry eyes to take in the room. Parvati slumped over the table, sobbing into the crook of her arm. "I don't understand what I did! Why -hic- did she have to be so cruel? I thought we were bonding!"

"Hey, it's not your fault," Ellie soothed, rubbing comforting circles between Parvati's shoulders. "Nyoka is a terrible person. She's probably drunk again - she's a total ass when she's drunk. Just ignore her, okay Par?" She looked up and scowled when she saw Nyoka. "What do you want?"

Nyoka couldn't respond; her tongue felt like a dead fish between her teeth. She could only stare, stunned, at Parvati's shuttering form. The realization that she had done this - her cruel words, spat in a moment of sheer panic, had reduced her shy, cheerful crush to a complete emotional wreck - drove like a dagger into her heart.

Ellie was right. What kind of absolute scumbag would do something so awful to such an absolute angel?

"Hey, dipsomaniac. Do you fucking mind?" When she still didn't answer, Ellie raised her other hand to snap her fingers impatiently. "Christ, are you that drunk? The fuck do you want?"

Nyoka finally snapped out of it. "Nothin'," she muttered, lowering her gaze to the floor. "Don't want nothin'." She grabbed two bottles of purpleberry wine and shuffled back to her room, ignoring the muttered scoffs behind her. As soon as the door was securely locked, she sank into her soft cot and popped the first cork.  "Here's to being the baddest bitch on Monarch," she whispered, the first salty tear trickling between her lips, "and the fucking worst person on the Unreliable.

Cheers."

[lettersforyoulettersforme]

New Post

August 2nd. Holy shit. Summer always does that thing where it’s basically gone the second it arrives. Like an orgasm. Or a long weekend trip with your boyfriend. Or the last train home.

I’m sitting in the Potter’s House with a fresh cup of coffee that smells divine. I feel like my sense of smell has developed more as of late? Like I can smell the flowers in my bedroom so strongly sometimes that I have to move them to a different spot because their pungency keeps me awake. Maybe it’s me… but it’s most likely cheap ass Trader Joe’s flowers. ANYWHO, the coffee is inticing after a late night after a long day. I worked from 8-4:30 and then came home to watch Grey’s and curl my hair. Basically unwind for a few hours because I deserve it. I have been super stressed as of late. Just with the whole Ai Elo situation and then finding the apartment and then moving and then finding new tenants to occupy the space. I just need a huge exhale and a massage. I honestly might book one for myself. I definitely need a pedicure at the very, very least. I feel like I have aged 10 years in the past 2 weeks. It has been so stressful and I hate that I’m letting it get to me. But honestly, who wouldn’t let all of this affect them?

I had a lovely acupuncture appointment on Monday with Wendi (since Jim is away). She’s an acupuncturist and a reki healer and I loved her energy. She was so open to my experiences and just wanted to help me heal from the trauma. I told her about my waking up in the middle of the night and she noted that I was being too vigilant. She didn’t say it in a condescending way, just as an observation. And I think she’s right. Just being vigilant and listening in my apartment in the night convinced that someone is there. She told me that I should invite warm spirits and warm, happy presences and energies into my bed before I sleep as a way to feel more comforted. I liked that idea and it worked last night. I did mention that whenever I’m sleeping with someone in the bed, I don’t feel scared or wake up mid- night. I just wish I could be that comforting presence for myself but not right now.

I feel like I haven’t seen Stephen in a hot second. He’s been crazy busy with work and I guess the last time I saw him was Sunday evening. He was doing invoices and we had dinner and Jess from work dropped off boxes. That sweet angel. I need this vacation with Hayley ASAP and I know that Stephen’s mini vacations are coming up soon. He needs them too. We’re both stressed with moving and Ai Elo was traumatic for him as well. It’s just been a lot. I hate that this whole thing is defining my summer but what can I do? Wendi and I were also talking about the way in which grief and inspiration are the same energy, just channeled in different ways. Or that’s the way it is in Chinese medicine. But I agree with that. Makes a shit ton of sense to me. She had me sit in a chair and feel the weight and support of the chair on my legs and back and butt. It was so Marcia of her and I realized how much I missed having someone there to literally walk me through a savasna (essentially). The whole session was glorious and it makes me miss Jim and wish that I could still have Wendi too. I just want all the acupuncture and all the holistic medicine my body can handle! Maybe Snee and I can find a santucuary or something or the sort in Portland. That seems like the place to find a little bit of peace.

But you know, this whole experience has, in the most cliche of ways, inspired me in my own life. Because my life is drenched with beauty! I have amazing friends and a wonderful boyfriend and a great home. I am happy to have known Ai Elo because as much as I didn’t want a roommate, I loved having her as a friend. She was a little bit much at times but I do feel like she made an impact. She has this gorgeous lamp in her room. It’s made from a branch she found in the woods. She widdled it down and there are tiny little bulbs wound around the lamp that have succulents and spanish moss and crystals inside them. The whole thing is STUNNING and I remember that it was one of the first things I knew about her- that she made her own furniture. I always thought that was cool as shit and she even brought home an old cabinet/ table thing once that she found and sanded it down. It’s still in the living room. Not as beautiful as the lamp but I would never just take something off of the street. That’s what I loved about Ai Elo, she just had this determination that seemingly random things could be something. One time her friend’s mother or grandmother died and she took some dried lavender and put it in a mini satchel and gave it to her friend. I thought that was the kindest and most generous thing. What a sweet and simple gift for someone who is hurting. I also just fucking love lavender.

I’m over here (sorry for the jumping around of thoughts. I’m midway between this post and looking into classes for the fall and texting people and googling thrift stores in Portland) but I’m also over here looking up all the fun things to do in Takoma! It looks so cute and I can’t wait to check it out further. They have this place to get your hair cut and I may pop in their sometime soon. After I buy all of my textbooks… kill me over that. I’m definitely renting them because it’s so much cheaper, but it’s still expensive. Speaking of which, I just got a jolt of excitement about school starting back! I really can’t wait. I’ve been so focused on the negative aspects like the stresses of moving and having no free time. But I really am truly excited to be back in school! I realize it’s such a gift and a privilege. I can’t wait to do more learning and reading. Ha we’ll see what I’m like 4 weeks into the semester, but I can dream and make grand gestures NOW.

I feel like sometimes I’m not enjoying and relishing in my life enough. Last night felt like me enjoying life a lot. I was with friends eating the most divine food (fucking T Bone steak with pine nuts and thyme and garlic cloves cooked on top and a Chilean Sea bass with a celergy root glaze and the most amazing chive and sour cream mashed potatoes. Glasses of gorgeous and delicious rose and breads and cheeses and pork belly. I’m still not over it and if Hayley comes back here, we’re going there ASAP. This restaurant is like the opposite of vegan friendly and I couldn’t be happier about it.) Also, I did karaoke last night! For the first time ever. I know, I know. I wish Hayley could have been a part of it. But now my fear is gone and I’m just loving it and seeing it for the fun that it is. I sang “Man I feel like a woman” and it’s just a fucking classic. We were there as the place was closing and I watched Tesia freak out so much about what song to chose and what was in her range. She really wanted to sound amazing and as fucking obvious as it sounds, that’s not the point of karaoke. But I thought that was the point/ that was my fear until last night. And then I suddenly realized how fun and freeing it is. I should just listen to Hayley more. First the tattoos and now the karaoke. This bitch knows what’s up.

Stephen and I sign the lease for our new apartment tomorrow. OUR apartment. I feel much less nervous that I felt like I would. It’s gonna be a test and I’m gonna give him his space and I know he’ll give me mine. I’m just excited to have something that it is purely ours.

Let’s see what else I can say… Just trying to find a place for Mom, Dad, Char and I to have dinner when they’re in town. It’s proving difficult (as always) to find a casual place that isn’t too expensive and it’s loud as shit so that my Dad can hear). Honestly, I may just do a Founding Farmers Restaurant. Not mine personally but one of our restaurants… get that discount, you know!

Alright, I’ve rambled on enough. As always, thankful for the outlet!

[salzspektrum]

A / B (i totally know which one you're choosing here kjgdsj) / L / N / T

Arya Stark: okay so this is probably gonna be long, just like the other ones lol sorry #somebody stop me. she’s hands-down my favorite female got/asoiaf character and most certainly one of the most complex characters of anything ever imo. her entire life she felt alienated, felt like she was ugly and worthless. she didn’t fit in bc she wasn’t what people wanted her to be. she loves her family, even sansa. she misses them and she longs for them, yet she doesn’t dare to dream of seeing them again bc she’s afraid that something bad’s gonna happen (and it happens bc this is got, afterall). arya develops a deep bond with her wolf *casually side-eyes the show writers* and feels like she belongs somewhere. she’s afraid of rejection, she’s a senstive girl with a lot of love in her heart. *side-eyes people who want to paint her as a brutal mass murderer,also side-eyes show writers again* i love all these sides of her character, she is so multi-layered and it makes so much sense for her character. she has dark and bright sides. another thing that i admire and love is her kindness and openmindness (is that a word?). also she’s a fucking feminist. not that kind of “feminist” that says shit like “girls are stupid, girls who like feminine things are stupid” *side-eyes show writers one more time* she admires and respects all kinds of women and befriends people who are lower in class than she is, simply bc she doesn’t care about class. she cares about people. holy shit i guess i’ll stop now before i end up writing a huge essay lol sorry.

Bran Stark: yeAH YOU WERE RIGHT IS ANYONE SURPRISED BY MY CHOICE I KNOW I AM NOT!! (i’ll probably be mixing show and book stuff, sorry in advance) okay so this boy hardly gets any love from the got fandom since the writers love to forget that he’s an actual character and not just a way to show some exposition. also the fandom is hella ableist but let’s not get into the fandom drama, maybe another day. all this boy ever wanted is to become a knight, he dreamed of it. but one day he just happened to be placed into a terrible position and his entire life changed (truly fuck you jaime tbh). being disabled is a challenge, especially for a little boy like bran. honestly before I start writing down his entire arc, i will just name what i love about him: i love his kindness, for the smallfolk, his family, his friends; i love his intelligence and resilience; i love his determination to find the three-eyed raven. i also love how good he did when he was lord of winterfell. he’s in a position now, that he never wanted,a powerful and dangerous one. he still takes responsibility bc he knows that’s the best for the world rn. honestly his chapter in adwd was incredibly dark and sad, i read it and i was getting really sad bc you can really see how much all of this affects him, and now the three-eyed raven wants bran to accept the darkness. he has a deep connection with his wolf and he sees warging summer as some sort of escapism, he can run around and he feels whole. that’s just so sad. yet he’s such a strong character with so much love to give. truly before i start crying, i just wanna say that it’s a fucking shame that the fandom doesn’t appreciate bran for more than just his “cool powers” and the flashbacks. he is a wonderfully complex and interesting character and i hate this shitty ableist annoying fandom bye (wow i got angry REAL quick).

Lito Rodriguez: look;;you know how lovely this dude is.he is just!! so!! for real tho, he is one of my fave characters in sense8 (can’t choose 1 single fave bc nOoO) and I love his arc, how he overcomes some personal issues and learns to accept and love himself as a gay man and be brave enough to state that publicly. just the way he progressed is so beautiful imo. also he is super dramatic so I absolutely #relate to that.

Nyssa al Ghul: okay so she is absolutely badass and beautiful. this amazing lesbian queen will kick your ass if you’re a uglyass gross dude trying to hit on her, she has no time for shit like that. she’s daughter of the demon and should be the rightful heir, if her dad only wasn’t an asshole. she’s also super adorable and enjoys dipping her french fries in a milkshake, even tho it confuses her. she’s everything omg.

Theon Greyjoy: okay so this boy has been through some S H I T. not everyone enjoys him but to me he has one of the most complex story-arcs in the entirety of got/asoiaf. he started out being kinda dickish, yet somehow some of his behavior is understandable since he’s been raised as a ward and therefore as a less important member of the stark household. he didn’t belong with the starks but in the end he realized that they were his true family. and then he gets back home, gets rejected by his father, fucks some shit up and ends up being tortured for several years. the horrors that he goes through are insane and he is changing completely, trauma and all. now, i love this man bc he is incredibly complex and morally grey. he did some fucked up shit but for some of his decisions you can kinda see why he did what he did. he didn’t deserve any of this, he didn’t deserve torture and sexual abuse and he almost gave up on himself and life. almost. i don’t wanna write too much here bc i’m getting emo. just know that this man is a highly intriguing character and his chapters in adwd were my favorite, by far.

Drop five letters of the alphabet in my ask box, and I’ll give my favorite characters whose name starts with those letters.

[kitemist]

switched at birth season 5 episode 3 thoughts with spoilers

Live reactions as well.

Overall, bad pacing and more, more dark than good.

Daphne’s nightmares about bay.. </3

“I am this close to leaving him for my pillow.” DO IT THEN. AT LEAST YOUR PILLOW WON’T PUNCH PEOPLE. AND WHEN IT DOES AT LEAST IT WON’T HURT.

“I want them to get to know you a little before I drop the bomb.” well, since that awkward dinner in season 1, and also knowing who Angelo really was when the police went after him, I don’t think they are going to be that welcoming. And since there is that age difference. Just because it doesn’t bother you two doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist to others, especially when you reveal that part to them..and are they in such a state to talk to you two right now? With the whole money thing?

“It’s too bad we’re in public..” sigh. stay in public please.

“It’s just that I know him years before you did” and what? That makes it easier for her to take? Emmett is already upset at almost everything you go through, Bay, and Travis had to tell him that you were not his property, ever since “it’s forever.”

If only they put enough research into how the deaf actually communicate with the hearing as much as they did with down syndrome and development of one with such syndrome..

“Typical of a Shamingo.” That’s Shamingo-racist but yeah mingo is an ass. I never thought of him as a great guy anyway, even before that outfit.

“She needs a guy with some character.” Emmett’s an ass right now, but childhood friends! He’s the only one compatible right now! Or is going to go the direction of Luca. Please no.

“Throwing a guy at your daughter is not going to solve all her problems.” “Couldn’t hurt.” oh why

“I broke the girl code! Thou shall not date any guy thy friend has already dated!” Why do you need to break into ten-commandments-english for this? And besides, this means that Daphne broke it long ago. With your very, very first ex back in season 1. And you did too, with Travis! Or would this confirm that s5 swtichsters and s1-4 switchers are completely different people?

Yup, and there’s Daphne’s receipts.

“But she was in love with him! She even lost her V card to him!” Well, did that mean that neither of you are in love with Travis? Just get with each other! I guarantee that would be healthier than any relationship this show has ever shown, with gay males or straight male and females! Small shoutout to switched at birth to not have the lesbians die.

“But she broke up with him, I think that voids the girl code contract.” Why are you even having this conversation.

“I still feel terrible.” sigh.

“It’s mary beth, I thought we would become friends forever.” Well, ever since your breakup with Emmett was forever too, I can’t trust you on this.

If you knew a “lukewarm shrimp burrito” was a bad idea, why did you even take it with him? You still have whatever you caught in the Chinese forest!

I still find it confusing how you two are getting married AFTER the baby. You two don’t even remember correctly how you first even met.

Right HERE?! WHAT?!

This is the shortest notice I’ve ever seen since the Police came to your house to look for Angelo.

“I took the bullet for Reverend Daphne over there.” Yeah, because Daphne was going grief apeshit. And what’s with ordained minister? I thought you needed like a REAL minister who studied and all that.

Bay. Come on. I know you don’t want this to explode RIGHT AFTER this announcement. But at least let med student reverend Daphne check you for real. And that neck pain...yeah. Not going to let that slide after what happened to your hand.

“You know my daughter’s pre med. You two may have a lot in common.” Yeah, that first conversation went well. And just like this one you’re having right now, Regina comes in slightly panicked.

“The more the merrier” and “casual” shouldn’t be in the same sentence.

Hi mom. :3 <3

DAMMIT TOBY, YOU WERE IN A MUSICAL! YOU WERE AN ASS BUT YOU WERE IN A MUSICAL!

You’re going to tear your relationship at a bad time, huh. Well, I saw enough stuff on Instagram.

“I really care about you and I value our friendship.” Please, say this more, to Daphne.

ARE YOU SERIOUSLY KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW

Now, MB has broken the girl code to much more serious levels.

The cinematography and the conversation match..damn.

Bay...oh my god. “You cannot forgive him for something that happened to ME.”

“But sometimes life happens.” The excuse thrown all over the show.

“Eventually you can accept this too.” Well, Travis didn’t rape you and blew up over the internet. Or traumatized you for life over it. So...no.

Yup, Bay said it too.

“It brings all of that up again.” </3

“I want this to work out, I miss you.” </3

“You can break up with him.” I can’t believe this is actually a logical choice that I would support as well. But look at this drama, right after MB was heartbroken by having to leave Travis.

“You count, too.” Mom to mom. ;v;

Luca and Daphne having so much in common is going to tear Regina’s heart. Again, after Angelo and that guy at the cracked mug. I’m surprised she hasn’t gone apeshit at all, besides refusing help for her drinking problem.

Sniper to Medic. What a huge 180.

“Didn’t want one of my brothers getting hurt because someone wasn’t listening.” Oh, you are going to hate this show, Luca.

Daphne...?

“You went through serious trauma that day.” A huge understatement.

And through these losses, you are going to pick her up again, huh. Are you going to kiss this scene to make her feel better?

Thank god, it’s over with no kiss. At least he is being genuinely helpful...for now.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME, AGAIN?

WHY?! You are a stalker here, dad.

Regina, bad time. So much for what you said at the cracked mug.

“Trust me.” “Are you kidding..” Yeah, what a reveal.

“Why is it men your age can date women way younger and no one bats an eye, but when it’s a woman it’s like she’s robbing a daycare?” So close to being copyright striked. And yeah, hollywood already has an old man fetish.

“I say if it makes you happy, then go for it!” don’t say this to MB, not that you met before, dad.

Good recovery, at least.

And Travis’s violence hasn’t changed at all. Take that punching power and put it into your athletics, Travis.

“do we really have the right to be judging who your ex girlfriend is dating?” is the girl code abolished now?

and you two are fighting right on the night of your wedding. Is Toby gambling on sports?

Should I feel bad for Tank, even though he raped Bay, and was completely conscious that night when she wasn’t? The mood suggests I shouldn’t and that this eventual punch will be well deserved. Well..I’m conflicted.

“You don’t get to tell me who I can date!” Please, plaster this everywhere..

TRAVIS!

No punch, but this is worse.

what a mood 180. This entire episode will be one. This show will be one!

“Playing my music too loud one night turned out to be the best decision of my life.” oh. my. god. Now you DO remember! But now why did you name your son Carlton? Too late to change it now?

Yup. There it is.

Most awkward wedding ever. Why did the one with Nikki turn out smoother than this?

“we wanted to go non traditional..i think we succeeded.” yeah. ding.

“You just want him to get it. A bit quicker.” Frustration builds, even though you decided to keep him. Why not consult more help like Mom did?

YOU ARE GAMBLING!!!

And you are thinking quite far ahead. “Blowing off some steam” isn’t going to cut literally ditching your family.

;v; just a little relief.

There we go. Non traditionally.

“That was an interesting wedding.” Pacing, please.

“Are you jealous?” “Of course not!” By that first conversation...ugh.

Don’t just CASUALLY say that she almost died! Bay and Daphne made a pact to shut up but he didn’t. But wouldn’t he know not to share sensitive stuff like that?!

“We have put it behind us!” Well, one of us did.

Daphne.....</3

Thanks, Bay.

TANK. NOT YOU, AND NOT NOW.

And now we need MB to have more trauma so she is more susceptible to dating you, Tank?

“It just...happened.” Just like all romance in this show.

Now get out.

Daphne’s only reason for taking this well is because she went through enough too much surprising shit.

Now Bay is being there for her. MB rants by the window. I’ve enough conversations similar to this to know that this is serious.

“You can’t blame yourself.” “But I can.” After Angelo...wow.

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you.” “You were in china.” ;v;

Holy SHIT.

Okay...some light shed on tank. but “a good relationship” isn’t selling me...somehow.

“What does that mean for us?” “I don’t know.” ...

“Me neither.” How would you two be friends now? You can ditch the girl code for bay’s relationship, but for MB’s? Almost no excuse is acceptable. To both of you.

Thanks, Mom and Dad.

Bay is now signing in low light. Even if some is on her face, barely any is on her hands.

Bay slipped Emmett out. Well. It’s not going to be “forever” huh.

Nope. Not. At. All.

Bemmett’s going to resurface...fuck.