#cases in my place women tend to be looked down at than men
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empty-dream · 2 days ago
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I… was tricked. Everything he said was a lie. Kolbe is a wicked man. If only… that were true. Things would be much easier. But it's not so. He's a good man. He really is looking out for me. This must be the best I can hope for. This is my reality.
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sakurapandadreams · 5 months ago
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⪩⪨ ASTRO OBSERVATIONS PT 3
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Please take all of these predictions with a grain of salt I'm not a professional astrologer.
And here's my masterlist
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NATAL OBSERVATIONS
☀️ Neptune trine Pluto can also have exceptional psychic abilities [except they keep dismissing their abilities as mere coincidence]
☀️ Most dancers in many kpop groups tend to have Aries Sun or prominent Aries placement in their chart.
☀️ Pisces Moons tend to overdo their confidence, trying to hide the insecurities they have deep down.
☀️ Pisces Sun's are also good at manifesting provided they know that their good at it.
☀️ In many cases if you and your siblings have opposite rising signs you may look completely different from each other.
For example : If your a Taurus rising and your siblings is a Scorpio rising you both will look so different people can doubt your even siblings
☀️ Debilitated moons can signify unhealthy attachments towards the mother.
☀️ During your birth if your Moon left its previous sign and just entered its next sign, again you guys could also share the qualities of both those signs.
For example : Moon left Capricorn and just entered Aquarius you can have the traits of both Capricorn as well as Aquarius.
☀️ Check where you have Aquarius in your chart you feel like an outcast more in that place.
☀️ Capricorn risings are so much interested in crime documentaries, murder mysteries, solving criminal cases.
☀️ Pluto in the 3rd house can get bullied when young, being bullied for your intelligence, people considering you dumb hence they can also have trouble communicating their feelings with others most will keep to themselves.
☀️ Mars in the 7th house [men] tend to like women who are ultra feminine.
☀️ Venus in Leo in 8th house tend to get in laws that have a higher social status than them.
☀️ Leo Moons look up or learn from their mothers more than their fathers. Their mothers are also quite controlling and dominating towards the child as well as the natives father.
☀️ Mercury - Pluto aspects have a harsh way of talking sometimes they don't want to come off as rude but they still do. Often times whatever they say is incorrectly interpret or misunderstood by people.
☀️ Same goes for Mercury Square Saturn except these people have mastered sarcasm, they aren't blunt like Pluto rather sarcastic.
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VEDIC OBSERVATIONS
☀️ A person having Rahu in Bharani nakshatra may end up evoking a desire in the opposite gender unintentionally.
☀️ 3rd house Ketu 🤝 never running out of hard cash.
☀️ Also if your 1st house lord sits in the 7th house then that can at times give you a low self esteem same goes for Sun in the 7th house.
☀️ Purva Phalguni moons tend to have a good childhood but they have to adjust and sacrifice alot in their married life.
☀️ Also Purva phalguni moons [women] tend to love their spouse more, but that love isn't much reciprocate.
☀️ Purva Ashada Nakshatras are so good at teaching and also at research work. In group projects they end up giving excellent ideas. They also get the due recognition for the work they do.
☀️ Many a times if you have a Nakshatra that shares itself with two signs you can have qualities of both those signs in you [Chitra Nakshatra shares itself with both Virgo and Libra].
☀️ [Now this is my opinion and it can be wrong but still ☺️] I feel all signs attract envy in their own way, Scorpio and Leo's attract alot because their ruled by such fiery planets like Mars and Sun.
☀️ If Mars is aspected by Rahu or in conjunction with Rahu it can also give a person tendencies to doubt their own strengths and talents.
☀️ Hasta Moons or Rising both are soo good at drawing, mehndi, creating best out of waste, handicrafts, hand embroidery. More than cooking their good at cutting vegetables and decorating dishes. Also great at hairstyling. However they can be great dentists and surgeons as well [They get less credit for this]
☀️ Shravan Nakshatra is one of the most intuitive nakshatras, their another walking lie detectors.
☀️ Uttara Bhadrapada gives you blessings for the good karma you did in your past life.
☀️ Sun as your darakaraka can also give you a husband who would often show you off to others.
☀️ Ketu in the 7th house doesn't mean one won't get married they can get married but they will stay away from each other, like having jobs in two different places [long distance marriages].
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Credits for the images and dividers goes to the rightful owners.
Copyright © 2024 sakurapandadreams | All rights reserved.
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midnightfantasiez · 2 months ago
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Training Session | Octoberfest Day 12
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➺ Pairing - host!Younghoon x f!reader x client!Sunwoo
➺ Drink - Mystery Cocktail (wildcard x threesome)
➺ Summary - Never would you have expected one of your clients to actually come to you and ask for sexual advice. But when he does, there is no way you could turn him down & decide that it would be interesting to drag your fellow host from the club to join in on the fun.
➺ Word Count - 1,901
➺ Warnings - Smut (18+, minors DNI), profanities, dirty talk, both Younghoon & reader works in a host club (so yes it's in the red light districts set in Akihabara), petnames (honey, sweetheart), Sunwoo is pretty much inexperienced in here but he goes with flow and catches up along the way 👀, threesome, unprotected sex, blowjob, rough sex, cum tasting, spit kink (if you squint), face riding, doggy style, voyuerism, degradation, kissing, hickeys
➺ Author’s note - And here is the final installment of our Octoberfest collab!! it's been such a wild ride thank you to everyone who has been reading & supporting us!! this is my first time writing a threesome so forgive me if it seems awkward 😭 big shoutout to @daisyvisions for beta-reading this through for me i labyu loads 😘💗
➺ Taglist - @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @mamuljji @synthwxve @j4edo @h0mebody-heaven @nyu-topia @daisyvisions @momhwa-agenda @snowflakewhispers @from-izzy @kyaroscuro @kimsohn (join my permanent taglist here!)
➺ OctoberFest Masterlist | Main Masterlist
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“I’m sorry, sir. You want the number one hostess to tend to you today?” 
“Yes, ma’am. That’s exactly what I said,” Sunwoo spoke firmly as he pointed at the signboard depicting all of the hostesses on duty for the night. 
“I’m afraid I might be unable to respond to that request, sir. Miss Y/N is a very busy person-”
“How much?” Sunwoo spoke louder, a hint of desperation showing as he slammed his credit card on the table. “I don’t mind paying extra if that’s the case.”
“But sir-”
“What seems to be the problem here?” You walked into what appeared to be a commotion that could easily get out of hand if left unattended. You placed a reassuring hand on the waitress’s shoulder, giving her a light tap to signal that you were fine handling this particular client and that she could return to her post.
The moment you sat down next to the man, he subtly scooted away and lowered his head, as if suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed, with a noticeable redness creeping up to his ears.
“What’s your name, sweetheart? It looks to me like this is your first time here tonight,” you said seductively as you crossed your legs together while pouring you and him a glass of champagne. 
“S-Sunwoo…” the male mumbled as he gladly took the drink and chugged it down in one sip. 
“Whoa! Are you okay? Here, let me help you.” You felt a moment of panic, realising the champagne you had served was a bit stronger than usual (your services were naturally a bit pricier as the top hostess) as you reached for a napkin and gently dabbed his plump lips.
“Y-Yes! I just…umm…need some advice, if you will….” 
“Oh? What kind of advice?” 
“This might sound awfully ridiculous, and you can laugh at me all you want-”
“Sunwoo.” You firmly rested one of your hands on his shoulders and squeezed him. “Hosts clubs are a safe space, and nobody will judge you for anything, alright? Just like how all these men and women have their own reasons for coming here tonight.” 
It seemed that Sunwoo still needed some time to compose himself, so you decided to be as patient as possible and gave him some space—since he was the client that you were dealing with now, after all. In the midst of all of that, the number one host just so happened to walk past and decided to take a seat next to you—joining in with the fun as he wrapped his arms around a girl he was entertaining for the night.
“Younghoon! What brings you here?” You asked.
“Can’t I come over to see how the number one hostess is doing? Might need to snoop around to make sure you don’t snatch my job away, too,” he joked.
“Oh, come on. You’re just jealous that there are two number-one positions in this nightclub. Maybe you should move to the club down the streets-”
“Please teach me how to please someone.” 
Instantly, you and Younghoon turned to look at Sunwoo, who was now pleading with you—his eyes wide and doe-like as he downed another glass of champagne in one gulp. You thought you must have misheard; it had been a while since you'd had to resort to that particular service for a client.
A new rule has been circulating in the streets of Akihabara: hosts and hostesses are discouraged from engaging in those acts due to new regulations that all employers and employees must follow. However, a little fun outside the workplace doesn’t hurt if both parties consent—and you’ll even earn some extra cash outside the club.
You hesitated momentarily before closing the distance between you and Sunwoo as you wrapped your fingers around his chin to lift his head up. “Are you sure you’re down for this? I’m not sure if you’ll be able to handle the lessons that I provide, though.” 
Determined, Sunwoo grabbed your hand, intertwining his fingers with yours as he stared deeply into your eyes. “Affirmative.”
With that, you simply smirked before turning your head behind to look at Younghoon while giving him the look before you leaned in close to whisper into Sunwoo’s ears.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you, honey.”
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The repetitive sounds of something popping in and out of your mouth, followed by the hard, rhythmic chugging, filled your apartment. Sunwoo’s moans grew increasingly unrestrained as he gripped the sheets, while your beloved number-one host continued to thrust from behind at his own steady pace.
When you first brought it up, Sunwoo wasn’t sure about heading to your apartment to do the deed. However, when you slammed the door shut and kissed him feverishly at your doorstep, he instantly changed his mind and allowed you to do whatever you wished. 
It wasn’t long before you both entered your bedroom and threw the man right on your bed before you started stripping him and pulling out his cock to massage it a little before taking it all in your mouth. Since you had invited Younghoon over, he wasn’t going just to stand there and do nothing as he witnessed the scene unfolding before him.
While you were keeping Sunwoo busy, Younghoon wasted no time stripping both you and himself before positioning you on all fours. He quickly pulled out his already dripping wet cock that had his precum oozing all out before inserting it entirely into you. 
At this point, it was a full-on battle on who was going to cum first and whoever’s moans would be louder than the other. As Younghoon started picking up his pace, so did you with Sunwoo’s cock as you slowly tasted his precum dripping out from his member.
“Y-Y/N! I’m coming!!” Sunwoo yelped as you lowered your head to the point where you felt his tip touch the back of your throat before he released all of his liquids into you, the excess slowly dripping down from the corners of your mouth.
Sunwoo was bewildered to see the sight before him, but you wasted no time to crawl up against him to connect your lips with his—spitting back a little portion of his cum into his mouth.
“Taste yourself, baby. Look how well you did for me,” you cooed as you kept praising him for being such a good little puppy for you.
Just then, a sound was heard behind you as your fellow host did the same, with his liquids dripping down to your thigh as he came down from his high. “It’s not fair that Sunwoo gets all the fun while I don’t,” he sulked.
“Someone’s jealous, eh? Be patient, I’m just about to deal with you right now,” you teased as you turned behind to position Younghoon’s cock on your lips. But just before you begin all the fun, you instruct Sunwoo to lie down further, and you slowly rest your hips on his face. 
You could tell he wasn’t too sure about the whole idea, but you reassured him that it’d all be worth it. When he finally nodded, you completely relaxed as you sat on his face—rolling your hips a little for him to start licking your dripping wet clit.
Now that Sunwoo was preoccupied, you could finally start licking the tip of Younghoon’s cock as he threw his head back. You knew that out of all the girls back at the club, he’d always try to find the time to get to know you better outside of work—even though none of you decided to label whatever your relationship with one another is. 
It all started with just catching up outside of work and sharing about your days. Slowly, that turned into meeting up regularly at each other’s apartments, and you ended up spending the nights with him a lot.
It definitely was a first for a client like Sunwoo to ask you to teach the young lad himself some lessons. Still, knowing how Younghoon quickly gets jealous whenever you spend a tad bit more time with other guys than himself, you figured you might as well invite him to tag along and show him much more of what else you’re truly capable of.
“You nasty little slut; what’s up with you asking me to join in this whole little fun that you’re doing with Sunwoo?” Younghoon growled. 
“What? I’ve always wanted to try a threesome—besides, Sunwoo is having the time of his life eating me out underneath-” You paused in between as Sunwoo’s tongue stuck deeper into your clit, biting your lips whenever he hit a good spot. 
And Younghoon was not enjoying that look you have on your face. “You’ve got the audacity to act like this in front of me, don’t you?” 
Before you could even respond, he bucked up his hips as he cupped your face before pushing his cock in swiftly—making you choke in response to his action.
“All talk now, are we? I’ll remind you who is the one you should only be eating out regularly instead-” He let out a deep huff before a smirk was plastered across his face as he pushed your head back and forth—controlling your movements and not giving you a chance to escape from his grip.
As much as Sunwoo was taking his time to explore every area possible underneath truly, your sudden soft moans that turned into whimpers suddenly aroused him even further—making him wrap his arms around your thigh and pulling you down aggressively before picking up his pace to match with Younghoon’s. He was now attaching his lips to yours as if his life depended on it. 
The overstimulation was starting to get out of hand for you as teardrops began dripping down the corners of your eyes before eventually cumming all over Sunwoo’s face as Younghoon, too, released everything he’s got into your mouth. When he finally pulls out his dripping cock with a pop, you immediately fall straight down onto your bed in defeat—slowly trying to calm your breathing down.
You were convinced that everyone would take a break after all of that. Still, you have certainly underestimated how sickening Younghoon can get once you both start this whole game of provoking one another—because now you find yourself being flipped over.
Sunwoo was crawling up on you as he connected his lips with yours, turning it into a battle of swirling each other’s tongues. You slowly opened your eyes to see that Younghoon was now sitting at your desk, witnessing the whole thing, as he let out a menacing grin.
You didn’t fully understand what that meant, as you were trying your best not to get distracted. Sunwoo started moving down to your neck and began sucking while he brought forward his cock to your entrance and started rubbing his tip against your sore clit.
“Y-Younghoon…w-what’s going on?”
“I’m sure Sunwoo has picked up the skills he needed by watching me fuck you real good minutes ago.”
The moment Younghoon crossed his arms and legs as he leaned back onto your chair, he simply tilted his head to the side before smiling at you—one that you knew very well yourself that hid malicious intent behind that pretty face of his.
“And now, I’m going to be the judge of that and guide him along the way to the point that you can forget about walking properly for the next day or two.” 
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arabellasleopardcoat · 1 year ago
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Harwin Strong x reader = well-fucked. (pleaseee?)
Lemon Cake (Harwin Strong x Reader)
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Summary: Harwin’s wife is a tough crowd.
Warnings: Smut. Unprotected sex. Fake orgasm, then a real one. Communication with your partner is sexy. Talks of sweets because I am starving.
A/N: This has been sitting in my inbox for a long time, and I was thinking of writing a sex marathon for it, but then I had this thought… What about a reader that struggles to orgasm? That’s common for women. I thought that Harwin would be the one who cares the most out of all the HOTD men.
You do not come to the marriage bed an innocent. You are a noble girl from The Reach, and so, no expense was spared for your education. Your Lady Mother had made sure you came prepared.
So that’s why, in the middle of the act, as your new Lord Husband pushes and grunts, rocking his hips against yours, you suddenly clench down. You clench and unclench, and give a few undignified noises, and then go limp in his arms.
Pulling back from you, Ser Harwin, or just Harwin, as he has asked you to call him, looks perplexed.
You grin. You must have done well if he looks so amazed. Remembering your Lady Mother's advice, you smile at him.
“Thank you. That felt nice.”
“I am afraid…” Harwin frowns. “Did you… Um. Was that supposed to be…?”
Perhaps he needs help. Perhaps no other woman had done that for him, although you knew it was likely Harwin had his first time with a whore, and they were much better at pretending than you were.
“I finished. I had a great time, husband. You should be proud of yourself.” You smile at him, trying to get it to not sound rehearsed.
You had not, in fact, had a great time. It had been mostly an uncomfortable time. You weren’t totally lying, either. Some of his earlier caresses had been pleasant. But no matter how much he had prepared you for it, the breach of your maidenhead had hurt. Your body felt like it was not meant to stretch that way.
Then, you were too in your head to properly enjoy it, wondering if you were pleasing him. No matter if he was trying his best to please you, you were thinking about how your body looked, how you sounded. You just wanted him to be happy.
Harwin had been a wonderful betrothed. Calm, gentle and reassuring. He had taken time listening to you and getting to know you. Despite being very different from you, he had partaken in your hobbies and interests, to get closer to you. You felt he deserved a reward for it, something you could give to him in exchange for his kindness.
Hence, the false peak. Your Lady Mother had told you that men liked that sort of thing. They felt proud, when they could boast about how good they made their ladies feel. And men were less likely to stray when they found their wives fun to bed. You intended to be a joy.
“My lady.” Harwin pulled out of your body. You frowned, confused. “You certainly did not.”
“Yes, I did.” Your voice is gentle. Perhaps he needs extra reassurance. You have no problem feeding his ego, considering he has been really nice to you since you were engaged. “It was wonderful.”
“You did not. I will not ask you why you felt the need to fake it, but I will ask that you do not lie to me.” His tone is stern. You wrap yourself with the sheets, like a scolded child. Harwin stays silent for a moment, before placing a hand on your back. “Did you really enjoy yourself, or are you telling me what you think I want to hear?”
“I was…”
“Be honest, wife. Remember your vows.” He interrupts, before you can think of a better lie. Harwin has a harsh tone that makes you understand exactly why he was made Commander of the Citywatch. You decide to drop the pretense, then.
The two of you don’t know each other well enough for you to know if it is safe to keep lying. Is Harwin good at catching lies? Is he observant? You don’t know. And in those cases, instead of digging a deeper hole, honesty tends to be the best policy.
“I wanted you to be happy, and proud.” Your tone is soft, still facing away from him. He lays down behind you, spooning you, and presses a kiss to your nape.
It’s a strange feeling. This was not how your wedding night was supposed to go. You had expected physical closeness and intimacy, but not this kind.
“I am certainly not.” But despite the harsh words, Harwin rubs his nose against your nape, sweetly. “Did you enjoy any of it?”
His tone is genuine. Curious, and not scolding. Perhaps, even the slightest bit guilty.
You are not sure of how to put it. It’s also not something you feel comfortable discussing. You are thankful for the fact that your back is to him, and he can’t see your expression. It takes you a while to have the courage to speak.
“I did, at first. But when you… When you entered me, it hurt. It was pleasant, I guess, after a while, but not really… Groundbreaking.”
It’s so awkward to say. You know this is not proper conversation, not even for a wife and a husband. The act is not meant to cause you any pleasure. It’s meant for Harwin to enjoy and to give you children. No more.
“Oh?” But Harwin doesn’t sound angry or scandalized. His tone is one of intrigue. You can feel his lips curling into a smile against the skin of your nape. “Do tell.”
You wonder how you could possibly explain. It finally occurs to you. You can compare it to something he will understand.
“It was like having a cake. Not a lemon cake, just a plain cake. Good, just not…”
Harwin chuckles, making you laugh too. The feel of the little huffs of air he lets up against your neck is quite ticklish.
“I get it. But I don't need you to fake your pleasure. I rather know I am not doing it right.”
“Is there a way for it to be enjoyable?” You look at him, over your shoulder. Curious, this time. If it was some other man, one less kind, you wouldn’t ask. “A right way?”
“Let me teach you.” Harwin whispers in your ear. His hands start mapping over your body. He caresses your neck, then your chest. His hands cup your breasts, softly massaging them.
It feels like before. Good. Warm. Arousal slowly starts to make all your hairs stand on end, breasts getting heavier, center going slick. Almost unaware of it, you moan. You can tell the situation is affecting Harwin too. His hardness, which had softened while you were cuddling, is back with a vengeance. It presses insistently against your behind.
Harwin trails a hand over your stomach, palm wide and warm. He lifts one of your legs, so it rests on his thigh, leaving you open to him. You sigh, sweetly.
“Like that?” He asks you, before lowering his hand towards something that makes you feel like you are on fire. His thumb taps lightly at it, and you moan. “That’s your pearl. If you rub it, it feels good.”
“Yes. Just like that.” Your head lolls over his shoulder, feeling the warmth of his body against yours. It suddenly isn’t enough. “The… Could you…?”
“Tell me.” Harwin kisses your jaw. “I want honest opinions.”
“Take your shirt off.” As Harwin shifts to comply with your orders, you notice he is hard again, poking at your lower back. “And… Um. Could we try again?”
“Try what?” He rubs softly at your pearl, making you mewl near his ear. Harwin chuckles, darkly.
You stare at him over your shoulder. You feel so embarrassed, you wish the earth would open and swallow you whole. Harwin grins, and does absolutely nothing. Even the fingers he has on your pearl stop.
“I want you inside me.” You finally say, when just being held starts being too little for you.
“Are you sure?” He presses a kiss to your temple, his fingers lowering towards your entrance. As soon as his hands are moving again, your hips buck against them, impatiently.
“You said there was a way for it to be pleasant. I want that. Show me.” Your voice comes out a little breathless.
“You are a wonder.” Harwin kisses you, softly. “My brave, gorgeous girl. I am so sorry for what happened before.”
“It’s alright.” But just as you are speaking, you feel him lining the two of you up. You do your best effort not to tense up or expect pain. Your words melt into a soft sigh as Harwin enters you.
Just as he did before, he stays still. The stretch is not nearly as uncomfortable as it used to be, but it’s still quite considerable. You doubt you will ever get used to his size. It feels as if he is pinning you into place. A bit overwhelmed, you search for his hand for reassurance.
“I was a bit overeager, before.” Harwin kisses your temple. “I wanted you so much, I wasn’t paying the attention you deserve.”
His hand caresses your ribs, softly. It tickles, and you can’t help but laugh. It prompts a chain reaction. Your laughter makes you clench up, which makes him groan and makes you laugh even more.
“That’s flattering.”
Your laughter buys you a much-needed respite. No longer does it feel like you are being pulled apart. Still, Harwin’s sad puppy look gets to you.
“I was too in my head. Just not in the moment.” You explain, not wanting him to feel bad about it. Because it’s the truth. You were the one who decided to fake a peak when there was no need for it. You have heard many ladies cried and yelled during their wedding nights, and their husbands didn’t even bat an eyelash. Harwin was not that kind of man. Had you been truly suffering, from what you had learned about him, he would have stopped.
If you had just allowed your face to show its true emotions, you were sure Harwin would have done something. But you had been too embarrassed and too caught up on making it good for him.
“I can keep you grounded, if you wish.” Harwin teases, kissing your cheek. His hips roll gently against yours, as if searching for something. Something he manages to find because you nearly jump from his arms when he touches something inside you that makes you see stars. “There?”
“There.”
He hugs you from behind, keeping the angle of his hips. This time, is more gentle, but much more precise. It feels good. Once again, it feels pleasant. Good. But nothing is happening. You start to get anxious. Why can’t you just get there? Will Harwin get bored with trying to indulge you? You would rather not be a burden to him, or get in between him and his pleasure. Perhaps it’s just not for you.
Harwin pulls you in for a kiss, without stopping the rocking of his hips.
“Are you still with me?”
You look at him, a little sad. You promised to be truthful, but you would rather not hurt his feelings. He is trying hard to please you, you can feel it. But it’s just not working.
“No. I am so sorry, husband. I am really trying, just…”
“That’s alright. Do you want me to stop?” Harwin kisses your cheek, not sounding too hurt. You risk a peek at his expression. His face is calm, encouraging, even.
“No.” You mutter. It comes out a little too sad because he boops your nose, making you smile on reflex.
“Here. Let me…” Harwin shifts you, from your side to sitting on top of him. The suddenness of the movement makes you yelp. “Use me.”
“What?” You cannot believe your ears. Hesitantly, you place a hand on his chest, bracing yourself. He smiles up at you, encouragingly.
“For your pleasure. Do what feels right. And if your thighs get tired, or your hips feel tight, tell me. I’ll help you.”
“I feel silly.” You complain, grabbing at his member. It feels warm and slick in your hand. Harwin makes a small noise at the contact, and you smile, sinking down on him.
It feels different immediately. It’s both deeper and increasingly intimate. But you feel self-conscious, staring him right in the eyes. There is no way you will be able to fake your pleasure now, not with his eyes on yours.
Shyly, you turn your head away from him.
“Don’t. You look gorgeous. The prettiest woman I have ever seen. “ His hand is gentle against your cheek, encouraging you to look him in the eye.
Harwin smiles softly. You smile back. And then, you arch your hips, searching for the right angle. He watches you, eager to learn how to please you. And you watch right back.
His face, going slack in pleasure. The way he grunts when you slowly get up and down, rocking your hips just so to get friction on your pearl. The way sweat starts to gather at his temples, making his hair stick down. It fills you with a secret thrill, pleasing him.
You want, no, need more. You rub at your pearl, yet it feels too rough to be enjoyable. Almost too dry. You whine. Harwin catches the hint immediately. He takes your wrist and presses a kiss to your palm, softly, before taking two of your fingers into his mouth. You startle a little, both by the contrast between the lewd action and the tenderness he treats you with, and how much into it he seems to be.
Harwin releases your fingers with a wet pop, giving you a naughty grin. You don’t need any further prompting. You feel almost uncomfortably wet now, after his display, but you still use the fingers he sucked to rub at your pearl.
It’s as if you are burning up. You are hot with need, thighs clenching and stomach tensing in preparation for something. Arousal thrums on your nerves, echoes in your bones. You are so close, a wave just about to crash against the shore.
Your eyes fall closed. It’s an impossible thing, you know. But you swear you can feel your pulse, beating under your fingertips, in that tight little bundle of nerves. You are starting to get tired, and you cling to Harwin’s shoulders desperately.
“That's it. Just like that, love. You are doing so good for me. Just a bit more.” His hand rubs your flank, softly. He is trying to encourage you, but you want to scream out in frustration. You are so close.
You grunt, thighs burning with exertion. It makes your rhythm falter. You sob.
“You can do it. Give it to me.” But you clearly can’t. Not on your own. So Harwin plants his hips and thrusts, aiding you along.
You moan loudly.
“Like that. More.”
He is quick to obey, helping you bounce up and down. As you finally, finally reach the peak both of you have worked so hard for, you lean in and kiss him.
“I love you.” And it's glorious. The best feeling in the world, warm in your stomach, body taut from head to toe. The wave finally crashing against the shore, a faint buzzing in your ears.
“I love you too.” Harwin says, squeezing your hands. He waits until you open your eyes and catch your breath, before rolling you over. “My turn.”
You laugh. He thrusts several more times, before falling on top of you. His face is the most beautiful thing you have ever seen, and you tell him so, enjoying his blush.
You stay like that for a while, before you get too impatient. You wriggle a little, feeling sticky all over, but Harwin just pulls you closer.
“So. Lemon cake or just cake?”
“Lemon cake. Definitely.”
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oleanderbailey · 2 months ago
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The Dinner Party of Adolescence
An internal monologue from Ives Gannet, the main character of my WIP novel Into The Vortex. Ives, the soon-to-be serial killer nicknamed the Portland Maneater, reminisces on how she chose to let her putrid nature develop back when she was still capable of stopping it.
1323 words // 6.5 minute read
Not a recommended read for those sensitive to mentions of sexual themes, murder and child molestation.
The only times I’ve felt true desire were those moments just before sleep. That’s the time most people tend to drift into yearning, right? They lay in bed and think of sweat-covered, glistening bodies and masturbate their worries away until they fall asleep. I do things a little differently.
My way of experiencing nightly desire seems to be less practical than the normal way, but that’s usually the case. These trains of thought never lead me to happy places – instead, to a tear-stained sleep and a jaw so tense it hurts in the morning. I don’t think of shirtless men with rippled abs or bikini-clad women, yet, I still find something to long for. I long for the desperate yearning of memories. I long to look behind me at everywhere I’ve been, and scramble back towards it, clammy hands reaching for the good that supposedly so heavily riddled my past. I long to be able to trace my winding trail of footsteps through the scenes I’ve seen, the homes I’ve lived in, the people I have loved, all the way back to my first everything – without feeling such an intense sorrow.
Even in the most benign-looking places I could visit in my head – break-times at my first school, the quiet walks in the local park, the kitchen of my childhood home – at any little disturbance, the bugs hiding in the cracks and the crevices will scuttle out of their hidey-holes, and I’ll remember. I’ll remember how disease and dirt has infected every experience I call my own. I’ll remember how other children would giggle amongst themselves and point at me as I paced the playground alone, I’ll remember only feeling safe enough to cry in the solitude of the deep woods, I’ll remember how much blood was on the kitchen floor and how I felt nothing when I saw my own mother’s lifeless body. Her head was pointed towards the door when I walked in, her mouth hanging open inhumanly wide, her trademark rosy cheeks a paper-white, eyes merely scattered with the remnants of fear. The fear I should have felt, too, but I didn’t.
All I felt was fascination. And then, I’ll remember why instead of lusting after memories, I fantasise about taking a gun and blowing them out of my head. They’re too irregular for me to understand. After a certain point, I stopped walking through life, and instead tripped over and was dragged through dirt to where I am now. I’m too tired to get up.
I don’t know why I’m like this. I just want to lose all comprehension of myself and rebuild my consciousness from scratch, because honestly, I think I’ve fucked up from my first thought. And unless I get a chance to start over, I’ll fuck up until my last breath.
If I were to try and rationalise myself – an admittedly bad habit that I sometimes try to get out of - I’d explain my current state as a consequence of my experience with sex and family and life being fucked up so young, so early into my development that I can’t see any point trying to be normal moving forward, because I never will be. Instead of doing what others do and push down any “forbidden” intrigues or desires, why shouldn’t I just embrace them? I never had the normality that they cling onto, so what have I got to lose?
I understand why so many psychologists jump to theories that serial killers and rapists were molested as children too, even when there’s no direct account to suggest it. It’s such a dark and morbid thing that, to the human brain, it’s only logical that things so vile must have sourced from another evil. To some extent, they’re right. Mixing childhood or trauma with sex can really, really fuck you up - if you let it. That’s the key to it that not many of these psychologists can ever get because they’re talking about experiences they will never have; it’s not as simple as “get molested, become a sexual deviant” with entire inevitability, it’s more like having the option of becoming an absolute fucking freak offered to you at the dinner party of adolescence, whilst everyone else was served “a thing for boys with brown hair” or “a thing for girls making fun of them”. Well, “offered”… you’re never able to refuse it completely.
See, the dish I was served, it had teeth, malice, and a thirst to ruin the life of the prepubescent it saw before itself. Before there was any hope in stopping it, it jumped up from the table and sank its teeth into my flesh. If you were to ask for forceps to rip it out, although the fight and the desperation would be gone, you’re still left with the wound, and then still left with the scar. You’re not truly free from it. But, you are free from the danger you could manifest. You know how to easily keep a lid on it.
Others like me immediately asked for the forceps – they were scared by something feeling wrong in their head and they cried to their parents about it, who quickly whisked them off to a child psychologist who knew what they were doing and knew how to ensure this child’s wounds turned into perfect, shiny scars. Something I struggle with when I look into the mirror each morning is that I liked the feeling of the curse gnawing at the muscle in my forearm. I was intrigued by these thoughts and that I was thinking beyond the trivial hand-holding that my classmates were discussing on the playground. But, most of all, I didn’t care that it wasn’t normal – because I never knew if I was normal! Pushed out of my family, pushed out of any conceivable social group in school, I never had a reference. So, I just never asked for the forceps. Because I didn’t know they existed. I looked at the demon making mince of my flesh and I took it as a fascination.
I know that’s not entirely my fault. I was just a kid – a very, very lonely kid – who didn’t know that her brain was driving on the other side of the road until it was too late. Everything just aligned too well – I was born morbid, I lived in morbid, and was in perfect shape to react to something like the murder in the way that I did. On the other hand, I feel like I still would have loved the way things were going even if I knew they shouldn’t be going that way. I didn’t want to stop this when I could, or to seek treatment when it would have made a difference. There’s no way to know, of course, but after all these years I have never been able to shake the feeling that my demented decisions caused all of this, and if I was a kinder person to myself, things wouldn’t be like this. I chose to be this way.
I am an evil reimagining that my holier self sees in the bathroom mirror each morning. I see her, too. I see her disappointment in what she knows is inside herself, and what she is capable of. To her, I embody filth. To me, she embodies everything I could have been. Just to scare her, I stare into her eyes sometimes until she starts crying.
Being so comfortable with what is vile about myself has led me to reject the parts of me that are wholesome and good. I want that cunt through the water-stained glass pane to wake the fuck up and realise she is already what she is so afraid of being; she has just sugar-coated everything to deceive others and hopes that she will eventually deceive herself. But - she won’t. I know she won’t. Because it didn’t work for me, either.
Purity is fucking overrated.
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areiton · 1 year ago
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I know you’re sick of the age gap argument but it’s never not going to be remarkable to me that so many men, especially men in Hollywood, can never seem to meet women their own age. There may not be a pattern with Chris, as perfect as we all think he is up there on his pedestal, but there is a pattern of young women being groomed and taken advantage of by older men. Am I saying Chris is doing this? No. But its a conversation worth having, even if the catalyst of this conversation this time is our untouchable, perfect, cinnamon roll Mr. Evans. 16 years is considerable. There is a power imbalance. They have always been at completely different life stages and always will be. Alba may not be a victim but to shut down the conversation just seems callous to women who actively get taken advantage of both in Hollywood and out.
There is a pattern and a problem in Hollywood of men in power grooming and preying on younger people, primarily women. That is not a thing I said anything about ignoring. I am talking about a specific pair of people. Chris who has no history of problematic dating or using sex/relationships to groom or create power dynamics. And Alba who is not a child.
You (and other fans) can project whatever issues you want onto them but there is not a power dynamic that I am aware of--him being older does not actually automatically create a power imbalance. CAN IT? Sure and when there is a standing history of grooming and problematic relationships (Leo DiCaprio. John Mayer. Jake Gyllenhaal. Joe Jonas.) then I'd be like oh hey we should look closer. There isn't in this case. An age gap doesn't mean the relationship is fatally flawed and doomed to fail, it means they have to work to make it work which--is true of any relationship???
But I am not and was not talking about OR silencing all discourse about Hollywood problems??
This. Case. Is what I'm talking about.
Do I know there are problems in Hollywood FUCKING YES because I pay attention. But Chris--who I don't think is perfect but tends to be fairly unproblematic--is not what you're talking about. They are apples and oranges. He has not dated a litany of underage girls or girls significantly younger than him. So. sure let's have the convo but lets do it in a separate place than a guy who just got married because making it about systematic Hollywood problems when it's mostly just fans pissed he married someone is...a stretch.
Also friendly little aside--fuck off with "i know you don't want this but" bullshit. It's rude. You come into my ask box trying to pick a fight, at least own what you're doing.
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cowboyjen68 · 2 years ago
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hiii!
i'm a younger butch lesbian, but there's a bit of a roadblock: i live in a very cis/heteronormative place, so i have no butch role models. i have no idea how to...well, be butch.
tips and tricks?
This is an easy and simple answer. Just be you. Dress in what makes you feel confident and comfortable.
Being butch will come as natural as breathing to you.
The best butch role models will live life as their honest selves whether that be an outgoing smiley extrovert or a quiet stoic introvert or anything in between. She won't need to put on a facade of toughness or act in any certain way to appease the outside world. We are perceived as butches just by existing so we might as well live life in a way that makes us happy.
You don't need to subsribe to any roles or rules as expected by society. IF you are butch you are butch. Be you.
Now some less woo woo advice. LOL Boy shorts or boxer under wear are almost universally comforting to butches. (NOT all by many) so try some Wal Mart boxers on for size. They seriously made me more comfortable and confident in my younger years.
IF you want to shop in the men's (boy's section) go right ahead. Rarely does anyone look twice because, frankly, men's clothes are accepted, in general, as more gender nuetral than women's clothes. Thrift stores are great places to try different clothes on to see what you like. It is a chaotic grouping of all kinds of styles and sizes for much less than retail (in many cases but beware over priced items larger second hand stores ). Once you find a style you like you can go to new or stick with used.
Shoes... I wear women's Columbias because they are good for my feet, affordable and suit my manual labor jobs. DO not neglect your feet for fashion. Find and spend the money on good shoes. Men's are just too large for me and sporting or outdoor activity shoes tend to have similar quality in men's and women's as opposed to dress shoes were women's are crap and men's are sturdy.
Flannel at big box stores are pretty affordable. Estate sales and garage sales, auctions and thrift stores can be a great place to find vintage, unique men's clothing at a fraction of on line or retail. I have found some very cool ties and belt buckles and dress shirts by taking a Saturday to check out estate sales. If you don't like them down the line you are only out a few bucks.
It warms my heart to see young women embrace the word butch and their own butchness because with that acceptence can come a wonderful community and a source of support in life.
Butch hugs from me to you.
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magicaleggplant · 8 months ago
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extremely belated montreal worlds impressions, part 2
part 1 (pairs and women recap)
finally finishing this a whole month after worlds... i'm traveling again over the next couple of weeks and i've barely recovered from montreal! anyways, here's the (very rushed) ice dance and men recap.
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ICE DANCE
...is a fake sport, but i enjoy the vibes? i don't know a lot about the technicalities of ice dance despite having watched it for many years, so it mostly comes down to whether i like a team or not. overall i enjoyed the event, the free dance more than the rhythm dance (there are only so many 80s RDs i can take...) there were a lot of enjoyable free dances, even in the early groups! i actually enjoyed them more than the final group, in a way. the podium in ice dance tends to be too predictable.
chock/bates: i've never had much of an opinion on this team. i liked them best when they were doing character pieces like the snake charmer fd, but i also found myself enjoying their rhythm dance at worlds. they skated it very well and it was fun and engaging. the free was a bit of a question mark... i thought they had a lot of interesting positions throughout, especially in the lifts and choreographic elements, but the whole program felt a bit disjointed to me. it was fine, it didn't leave much of an impression. the whole did not feel like more than the sum of the parts... their speed was also not the best.
gilles/poirier: i can't remember much from their rd except that piper's costume was amazing, i loved her holographic leggings. their free was a MOMENT, though. wuthering heights has been one of my favorite free dances all season, and it was so good to see it live in front of a home crowd. they are such good storytellers, and when their choreo hits, it really hits. i love when they do something unusual like this program - it doesn't always work, but in this case, it did. the placement of that curve lift was perfect. i will note, however, that they are also not particularly fast.
guignard/fabbri: nearly swore out loud when her dress caught on her skate right in front of me. that was a nerve-wracking few seconds until the end. their free dance was beautiful and suited them really well, i especially loved the choreo assisted jumps near the beginning. their skating skills are clean and precise. i just wish their rhythm dance didn't have such a godawful music cut. none of their RDs have suited them well in the last few seasons.
fear/gibson: no thoughts, head empty, vibes only. in all seriousness, i enjoyed their rhythm dance, it's fun and it's a great fit for them. i did not enjoy rocky. i would have loved it as an exhibition, but not as a competitive program. i can see how it's a crowd-pleaser, though. they were definitely popular with the audience.
lajoie/lagha: probably one of, if not the most popular team with the audience! they are one of the teams i'm most looking forward to seeing in the coming years. i became a fan when i saw them live at last season's skate canada. they skate big and fast, they have good skating skills and both programs were well-choreographed. their rd is a lot of fun - that's how you incorporate a theme and commit to it! i love how most of the dance moves are choreographed into the step sequences instead of stopping and posing. the fd music is a little one-note and i still prefer last season's white crow fd, but their skating quality makes up for it. i'm so glad they were still able to skate at worlds after marjorie's concussion earlier in the season.
carreira/ponomarenko: loved both of their programs, especially their fd. i never knew they could pull off drama so well. their growth in the last two seasons has been phenomenal. it was hilarious that the audience kept getting faked out by the music in the end and clapping before the program ended. i probably would've had them a place higher in the standings.
other notes:
i came out of worlds with an unexpected appreciation for lopareva/brissaud. i never paid much attention to them before, but their skating skills were impressive. i don't think the audience really "got" their rd, but props to them for choosing to do something different. the fd was a snooze, though.
i also enjoyed demougeot/le mercier's free dance. some really interesting choreo moments.
turkkila/versluis: enjoyed their free dance as well, it's a nice look on them.
lim/quan's fd was another Moment! i am super excited for this team and how far they've come in their first senior season. hannah's acting and expressions are god-tier... they need to work on speed and SS, but their fd was gorgeous and one of my favorites of the event.
felt so bad for the taschlers' fall in the rd. i think they were the fastest team in the whole ice dance event, it's so impressive how powerful their skating is. i have questions about their packaging sometimes but i really like this team, and i hope next season goes better for them.
orihara/pirinen's fd was another favorite of the event. they are both SO expressive and fun. in any other team, yuka would outshine her partner, but juho not only keeps up with her but complements her perfectly!
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MEN
this was the event i was most looking forward to at worlds, and it did not disappoint. as chaotic as i was expecting it to be, i did not anticipate that it would be quite that chaotic. men be menning, as always.
ilia: i wish it were otherwise, but his competitive performances were just not doing it for me. his weaker skating skills were very obvious live when compared to many other top men. i like his sp choreo but i feel like he's put less performance into it with every competition. it was disappointing to see how much he slowed down during the step sequence. (granted, he did have an undisclosed injury at worlds, so that could have been an exacerbating factor.) the free was...historic. i genuinely wish i felt something while watching it, because the audience was losing their shit with every jumping pass lol. and why shouldn't they! like...what the fuck! this is the most incredible jump drill the world has ever seen! who knows when or if he can replicate it again! ...but it's still a jump drill. (side note about how irrationally annoyed the choreo sequence makes me. it's just randomly tacked on the end, the music cut is so abrupt, it has nothing to do with the rest of the program, shae lynn why.) and then i watched him in the gala and he was like a completely different skater. complete 180. the difference was so stark, i could hardly believe it. he can perform! he was giving more in that teenage-angst-ridden exhibition than i've seen in all his competitive programs combined. i can only hope that he brings more of that energy to competition someday, because that's the kind of skating i want to see, that's a skater really connecting with the music and the audience.
yuma: i'm about to heap an embarrassing amount of superlatives on this kid. it was my first time seeing him live, and he was everything i'd hoped for. jumps light as a feather, running edges for days. (you should have heard my ungodly shriek when he landed his 4F in front of me! it looked so easy.) skating skills - sublime, every stroke effortless, excellent speed. but what i'm most impressed with is his artistic improvement this season. he's always been an incredible technician (and i have a lot of thoughts about how ilia is being branded as The Technician and yuma The Artist now, when in fact yuma's technique is just as good, only with lower base value, and his SS are far superior, but i digress) but he has really put in the work to become a better performer and fine-tune everything from his body movements to his interpretation of music. jokes about making me like imagine dragons aside, i think his sp helped him explore music and sharp movements that were out of his comfort zone. loved that step sequence. (the only criticism i have is that he needed more swagger. he needed some more of what adam was serving in his sp, a certain cockiness and suaveness. but yuma has always been a more introverted skater. i think that kind of expression is still difficult for him.) the free was simply glorious. i didn't think i would like yet another rain in your black eyes program, and i was side-eyeing lori nichol for giving yuma this music after she used it for sui/han. but yuma made it his own. there were so many beautiful moments perfectly timed to the music. (ina bauer! spiral! and the step sequence, ahhh) he was so close to being clean, there was an audible groan in the audience when he fell on the 3A, but then they cheered him on until the end, which was heartwarming. what an incredible comeback season from yuma. i'm so excited for his future, i think he has so much potential and many bright moments ahead. now i've written a goddamn novel already, but i haven't even mentioned werther yet. i'll just say that his exhibition is one of the most beautiful programs i've ever seen, competitive or otherwise, and it shows off everything good about yuma's skating. perfect. no notes.
adam: where the fuck do i even start. honestly...if i could only remember one moment from all of montreal worlds, it would be his free skate. it was THE skate of the event. the mounting excitement as he landed all his jumps. the way i said "oh my god" out loud as he set up for the backflip, then landed it in front of me. the audience in complete hysterics. i can't even describe what the arena was like after his free skate. it was. insane. it genuinely felt like there was electricity in the air. the screams were deafening. my heart was pounding. it took me an entire group of skaters to come down from that adrenaline high, lmao. meanwhile, adam sat there in the green room...for hours and hours...and then ended up getting bronze because why the fuck not lmao. it was kind of the perfect conclusion of a chaotic season and a chaotic worlds. yeah, that free skate was THE moment. on another note, i don't actually like his free that much from a choreo standpoint. i think he's one of the most expressive and unique skaters in the field today, and he can pull off a lot of benoit's weirdness, but this free just isn't one of my favorites. it's extremely memorable though, for sure. his sp, on the other hand, was a disaster, but i really appreciated how he kept performing despite the messy jumps. he skated the step sequence like the jump mistakes didn't even happen. that's the sign of a committed performer. i'm very excited to see what else adam has to bring in the future, though i hope he doesn't start throwing in backflips too often - they're only fun when they're infrequent and unexpected.
shoma: shoma has a particular way of moving that is so unique to him. where yuma's skating is springy and light, shoma's skating has weight. it's very difficult to describe, but i mean it in a good way. it's the way everything he does feels so deliberate. he has excellent upper body carriage and his movements really project out into the audience. his sp step sequence was a highlight. he has an innate musicality that is natural to him. truth be told, i haven't liked his programs as much since he moved to stephane, but it was good to see his skating live again. i don't know if shoma will retire soon or keep competing, but if that was his last competition, i'm glad to have seen it, jump issues aside. i first heard of him as a novice skater back when i was first becoming a skating fan. i've been through quite a few generations of skaters' retirements, at this point. still an odd feeling when it might be someone you first saw as a tiny child, though. i also enjoyed his exhibition, it was a different style for him.
i wrote way too much about the top 4, so i'm going to try to keep the rest of this short:
jason: i'm just glad he's still skating. the world needs more of him, for as long as he's willing to give it.
lukas: very fun, i enjoyed him quite a bit.
deniss: finally! a clean short! more of that and fewer quad attempts, please.
kao: ugh. the collective wince in the arena on those falls... i wanted him to skate a clean attack on titan so badly, i love that program for him. he's very talented and INSANELY fast (cannot stress this enough, his speed is mind-blowing) but still lacking in control, and his performance skills need work as well. i hope this worlds was a good learning experience for him.
nikolaj: he's...so tall lmao. amazing lines. good musicality. terrible spins. looking forward to his improvement.
junhwan: the way i put my hands to my face as he fell on the 3A right in front of me... i just hope next season is healthier for him. he's a very, very quality skater and he deserves better.
don't talk to me about boyang
last but not least, shoutout to donovan for those incredible personal best skates! he still needs a lot of work on his SS and speed, but i really hope his jump consistency keeps improving.
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all in all, worlds was just...a tornado of emotions. some bad, most good. it was my first time seeing the world championships live, and i'm really glad i had the experience. for anyone thinking of going to worlds in the future, please be aware that the days are LONG. i skipped all the practices and some earlier groups of the short programs in order to explore the city, and i was still completely wiped out after every day of competition. it took me several weeks to recover, lol. thanks montreal! i definitely won't forget that week.
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dukeofankh · 1 year ago
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So in my wandering in the wilderness of Reddit for several years, I spent most of my time in r/Menslib, a feminist subreddit concerned with the challenges of deconstructing patriarchy as a man. It largely sucked. In short, I think that the norms of men's social spaces are foundationally incompatible with the sort of work that you need to do to heal men. It's not failing to materialize because men aren't trying, it's that people are trying to make topiary with flamethrowers.
"You Just Don't Understand" is a pop-psych book by Deborah Tannen about comparing the conversational norms of gendered spaces. It's hardly definitive or universally applicable but I found it mirrored my own experiences pretty well as a queer/neurodivergent guy who's never really fit in in men's spaces. She says that in the case of men, the most basic building blocks of conversation are built around jockeying for independent, individual reputation and heirarchical status. Men focus on topics external to them, rather than sharing personal feelings, because the fundamental structure of conversation is conflict based and being vulnerable would expose you and your most intimate self to that kind of combat.
It's also why men tend to be so competitive about their niche hobbies --they found a pond small enough that they can be the big fish. The problem is when that pond is Feminism.
Putting aside the staggering number of men whose idea of being part of the movement is just publicly dunking on men who they percieve as less feminist than they are (implicitly demonstrating that they are winning feminism by comparison), there's also this rebranding of the basic toxicity of rugged independent stoicism into a new, progressive-tee-em version:
"Struggling under the Patriarchy? Just do your own thing. Systemic issues? What systemic issues? Sounds like someone just doesn't want to do the work. Looking for community and support and role models because you're facing judgment and disdain from others? Are you really though? Maybe you're just making it up as an excuse to not be a Sigma male--I mean, good feminist. I mean, I do what I want, and I'm killing it, so you must just not be as mature as I am yet."
People respond to desires for help, community, and movement with surprisingly bitter disdain. People who open up about how hard it is to face judgment for acting contrary to hegemonic masculine norms tend to get met with calls to just get the fuck over it. A lot of that seems to be that a fair few men have a sort of pride for doing what they consider to be "the best job at being a nontoxic man" without any help, and they look down on men who want to have any sort of larger movement or support system in place to make that easier. It being easy would make them seem less cool for succeeding.
Men don't tend to welcome discussions of the personal, like I said above, but what shocked me going there after tumblr was the degree to which lived experience was considered...I mean, not even lacking in inherent value, it was more thought of as an active detriment. Your personal experience? That's based on your feelings. You've almost definitely warped that with your own perspective, and you shouldn't trust it.
As an extension of that, there's a sort of structural difference in how culturally, men and women's discourse seems to function. With women, it is a collection of narratives, the most common and shared blending together to form a consensus. With men, it is much more a system of gatekeepers and experts holding court above a throng. The ideal relationship is more prophet/disciple. Presuming your idea is good enough to share therefore must mean that you are assuming that level of heirarchical authority. But if your idea was good, then you would have a degree and a book out. If you don't, if you're some random guy from the internet, and you sharing your perspective HAS to be challenged or else people are implicitly granting you that authority. And what follows is the most hellish pedantic bullshit you've ever seen in your whole life. Someone knowing more than you is someone who could look down on you. So there is a major incentive to find even tiny, inconsequential mistakes, to prove that they're a pretender to the throne you see their opinion as claiming.
The result in terms of the actual moderation is a massive focus on external links and articles to spur conversation, with most actual text posts written by users being deleted immediately. I've seen posts about people's history of growing up in the Patriarchy being removed because they're just "personal anecdotes and they don't have any citations", ive seen people being told "hey it's fine if you want to squabble in the comments on an article from a legitimate source but I don't think your personal ideas are really suitable for a full blown POST on the FRONT PAGE of our SUBREDDIT. I could make a whole post about the fact that the existence of Mods with an editorial viewpoint fundamentally changes the power structure of a community, but ultimately it was pretty depressing to see the extent to which instead of camaraderie and community you instead had to deal with a bunch of Redditors cosplaying at being part of an academic journal.
It's not some sort of unique moral failure on the part of men--the other half of Tannen's book makes some excellent points that having a conversational culture built off of the norm of building community doesn't actually prevent there being conflict and hierarchy among women. It's more that that conflict is expressed using the language of community. If you have a visceral response to a post starting with "friendly reminder..." you already know what I mean.
But the structure I encountered on Reddit is so starkly atomized, and I honestly don't see how it is even capable on a basic, structural level of doing the work it wants to do.
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panlight · 2 years ago
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What do you think would have changed in the family dynamic if Esme had married Carlisle at age 16? What if Alice had transformed and found her family right away?
For one, I'm glad SM didn't do the first thing. She already has weird age dynamics and very young female partners going on in a bunch of places. And while people tend to think everyone was marrying super young in 1911, statistically . . . not really. 16 was an 'adult' back then in the sense that socially a girl would be 'out' and wearing her hair up and dressing like an adult woman, but they still weren't routinely getting married that young. The average age in 1910 in the USA was about 22 for women and 25 for men. So, it would have been very unusual and I'm glad SM's penchant for very young women with older guys didn't win the day here. I mean, look at The Host: At the end there's an alien mind in the body of a 16-year-old girl in love with a man in his late 20s. And Melanie is 17 when she first meets Jared; he's 26. Why.
I just realized that's the same age gap as Edward and Esme who are supposed to be adopted son and mother. What.
The second option is totally viable and it makes no sense to me that SM didn't just . . . do that. My guess is that she didn't really think about the backstory too deeply and was just making stuff up as she went along so she had already written Jasper and Alice showing up together by the time she sat down and figured out Alice's timeline and then it was like "sure this super extroverted friendly vampire can just chill by herself for decades when she absolutely does not have to." You can handwave and invent reasons, but.
The timing of Alice could be interesting, too. She was changed in 1920, and Esme in 1921. If it took Alice a year or more to find the Cullens (which seems reasonable since she was still getting used to her powers and trying to learn not to eat humans), then Esme would already be there. That would establish the "parents" and "kids" thing even if Alice had technically been a vampire for a little longer.
If Alice showed up BEFORE Esme did though, that could change things, but I don't think it would matter too much. In that case it would be Esme joining an established coven of 3 rather than 2, and Alice would have seen her coming. But I think given Esme's relative maturity (being the ripe old age of . . . 26) and her nurturing personality she'd still fall into a mothering role, especially as the partner of the leader/head of the family. Alice being there that early might move her up to Edward levels of 'parenting' though, as Edward wouldn't be "the first" to Esme if BOTH Edward and Alice were already there when Esme showed up.
Alice still has her visions of Jasper, though, so Edward/Alice wouldn't happen.
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mithliya · 1 year ago
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I'm from Asia, and the overwhelming majority of us would straight-up not date white people. Some ethnicities are more likely to date out than others, but overall we're good, no thanks. Women who do date white foreigners tend to be levelling up economically (no judgement there from me) which is a well-known fact. While there is definitely white colonialist beauty standards at play in the majority of places, I have lots of experience with the corners that bs hasn't reached (Nepal, for a generally big example, where they love dark skin and certain features) - and even within the spaces where European-centric standards do apply, the majority of non-white people aren't interested in dating actual white people as a first choice. It has nothing to do with white people's racism or disinterest in non-white people lol. I don't know about the Middle East of course, but I think your experiences of Asia seem limited to the more English-speaking, cosmopolitan areas perhaps - or maybe you are talking about Japan, which I am not familiar with personally. However even in Korea I have a white friend (born there) who can't get a boyfriend because- in her words- men there sort foreigners as "fun times only" and local women as "marriage material". It's a bit ridiculous to think that billions of non-white people are genuinely thirsting over white people, it's simple not true - most people prefer to date within their race. Lots of people do feel attraction to white people, for the reasons you outlined or naturally as well, but your experience does not seem univeral (outside the Western sphere). It was kind of bizarre at first to come across this thinking in Western spaces but now it's just deeply agitating, because I notice non-white people in Western countries really do act like they're less attractive and it's insane to me. Like sorry, but here in my part of the world, certain Asian features on women are considered the height of beauty among these communities (to the point where that's problematic in and of itself). Definitely white beauty standards have wormed their way here too, but again, it didn't change most Asians' sexual preferences - it just made them look for those features in their own (not everyone, but most - yes some people would date white).
interesting… my experience has been the exact opposite. while i know some people would not marry a white person, they’re still the standard of beauty and marrying a white person can be almost a status symbol & people do act like dating them means you’ve won somehow. this applies for the middle east and i know similar standards exist in south & east & southeast asia. my gf explained the same type of phenomena exists in taiwan and neighbouring east asian countries & ive observed similar mindsets around white ppl being considered the most beautiful among south asians and west asians overall.
i’m not referring to english-speaking cosmopolitan areas either, i’m thinking of countries like the philippines and india and pakistan and basically the entirety of the middle east. admittedly i’m not familiar with nepal tho— it’s interesting to hear they prefer dark skin there, which is in contrast to the rest of asia in which colourism is very prominent.
i did notice white people are generalised as more of a “fun time” thing in many cases but people will still not look down on you for marrying a white person & shun you for it the way they would for marrying a black person, for example. the people generally think white people are the most appealing but often prioritise marrying people of similar backgrounds for the sake of cultural and familial standards.. not bc white people are deemed unattractive in asia. in fact, the whiter you are, the more beautiful you are deemed.
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rollercoasterwords · 2 years ago
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hello!
this is a little bit away from your last post but i think a lot of “hot take activism” has stemmed from oh they have a point! i’m going to drive this in further so i don’t look like a bad person!
even though some hot takes are subject to opinion
for example a lot of fan fiction writers have been slated for their E rating on mlm fanfiction and many of the critics are cishet women, whilst men in the fandom have taken no issue
now if a man were to take issue that’s entirely valid however a lot of people critique unprompted which then leads to a kind of mob mentality in a way where all of a sudden all explicit mlm fics are crucified and deemed fetishisation (even though no one had a problem before this one critique)
a friend of mine had written a fic that had been quite popular in a small fandom and was basically bullied until it was taken down even after he explained that he himself was a gay male
i’m all for calling out harmful issues when necessary: call a spade a spade
but i think sometimes people’s intention can be misconstrued and imo more harmful than the actual writing itself
(i’m on 2 hours of sleep and i have more to say! but i’m gonna keep this anonymous just in case i wake up and think “i didn’t mean to phrase it like that” although i think i got my general point across)
yeah i mean. i tend to think that most online discourse which takes nuanced issues and boils them down to one or two sentences is more about virtue signaling and performing morality for an audience than it is any sort of real activism, because flattening what should be a complex conversation does more harm than good. i don't necessarily think it's all ill-intentioned though, more just....people falling prey to the social media panopticon unfortunately
one thing i do wanna push back on a little though is that it seems like you're placing a lot of emphasis on the identity of the critics/people being critiqued, and that is part of what i'm trying to stay away from. like u say many of the critics are cishet women, but is that true? how do u know? do they all have "cishet" in their bios or something? like i'm not being sarcastic here and i'm not trying to be snippy, i am genuinely just like. asking u to reflect a bit on this point and get back to me. because part of what i said in my original post is that even if u are 100% sure about the way someone identifies, it still is not productive to treat identity as a fixed and static category. someone who identifies as a cishet woman could identify as something completely different the next day, and that's entirely valid imo
similarly, when u say "well it's different if a man takes issue with it," i just...do not necessarily think that's true. obviously it is important to take into account the ways in which someone's gender identity will affect their personal experiences and inform their critique, but i think the content of that critique matters more than the specific identity of the person making it, y'know?
like, i don't want to unfairly represent either side of this conversation. and if one side is people going "oh everyone writing these explicit mlm stories is cishet women!!" and the other side is going "oh everyone complaining about fetishization is cishet women!!" do u see how. both of those stances are operating from the same premise. and will therefore never be able to have a productive dialogue with each other. personally, my impression is that the majority of the people involved in this conversation on both sides are not, in fact, cishet women--at least in the marauders fandom. i'm not going to say that's 100% the case because it's impossible to do any sort of statistical analysis, especially given the fluid nature of identity. but do u see how the fact that we have different perceptions of who is actually talking about this makes a focus on identity in and of itself a bit of a non-starter for talking through the issue?
i do agree w u that mob mentality is a big part of this though, and what happened to your friend sucks + is definitely an example of the way this sort of policing around who can write what is ultimately going to hurt queer people more than it does anything to like. dismantle systemic homophobia. but i just wanna reiterate that the core of the issue to me is not so much "people are taking the conversation too far" as it is "the premise of this conversation seems to rely on an understanding of identity that is rooted in gender essentialism."
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finitevoid · 12 days ago
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my syntax + your vocab = gundham
people having a weird fascination with me but my complete inability to form meaningful relationships with people is a gundham point. He seems a bit tortured with whether he wants to have friends or not as well. ultimately pushes people away but still feels bad when he doesnt get to hang out. He cant figure out where he wants to be in regards to maintaining character and his own tolerance for other peoples presence
Sonia point for you. People really dont find me attractive (in this country. I got hit on in argentina and. That time in the plane heading to el salvador i was getting hit on by the woman and the man sitting on my sides. What the fuck? i am also attractive in europe in an exotic way for them ! Lol! White americans dont fetishize me as much because they are actually rather tired of seeing my people whereas europeans travel to cusco for sex tourism. Now if we’re talking colombian women thats another situation with american men. it is not the type of latina beauty i lean into) ive only ever gotten like one hermosa from a (non hispanic) individual walking past, one pedophile on the metro, creepy looks from older latino men, and two human trafficking moments that dont necessarily mean the people trykng to get me in the car with me want to be with me . it means i am potentially profitable. If i shaved my hair my non existent attention would be the same. Otherwise yes i … ahh maybe sonia point for me because the people interested in me are kind of kazuichi. But they tend to be somewhat private with me about it. Its not externalized in the way i think your admirers tend to? Besides perhaps dilo but that was more in a way to contact me in the first place through creative means which was not kazs case. Sonia for you
Actually now that I think about it like this we kind of had a sonia gundham moment in tati vore. Like you were the weird one and I was seen as comparatively normal but being with you brought forth such a drastic shift in weirdness that people almost couldn’t wrap their heads around it. Like they weren’t sure I could contain the multitudes to be weird with you but normal-er with them . Do you get what I’m trying to say. Like I was always weird but being around you makes this obvious. So that’s a sonia gundham point respectively
White supremacy affects beauty standards . How often would you say you got hit on in Argentina vs europe. And yeah the fact that you can count the number of times you’ve been hit on is. Yeah I couldn’t even begin to. What’s interesting about this is that I get hit on a lot less than I used to think I did. Back when I was crossdressing a lot and my hair was long there was a really noticeable uptick in the amount of (cis) male attention I got, and at the time I was so vexed like I was saying I was getting hit on all the time?$!? but I realized recently that compared to people who perform femininity better than me I didn’t hit on much at all. Emily swears up and down she gets hit on Every Day by at least one customer and that sounds fake as hell to me because even in my most conventionally attractive era I was only getting the creepy old man treatment maybe once or twice a week. my friend lexi does get hit on at least once a day and I know because I hear it. all the guys who hit on me seem to be into the fact that I look 8 . All the guys who hit on her are super weird. all the guys who hit on emily are in their 70s. What does any of this mean
My admirers are definitely more open about it. Rather than pursuing me directly (which is definitely what yours do) mine like to stake weirdly public claims of possession (like josh). whereas you get nerd guys who confess to you in discord dms. I get nerd guys too but I get the ones who want to groom me for some reason . But I still feel like you get more dogged pursuers than I do. Or at least more persistent ones . Kaz reminds me more of shima than he does josh . But there is still the publicness of kazuichi’s pursuit. So idk
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culttvblog · 16 days ago
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Ann Way Season: Within These Walls - Get the Glory Down
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As I commented before, doing a series of posts about an actor encourages me to see shows that I have never seen before, and this is one that you won't have seen on this blog before. The reason is that I don't tend to enjoy prison dramas because I see the subject matter as unremittingly dreary and in my cynical way I see prison dramas as a cheap option for TV companies because in their nature you just need one set and a lot of grey paint.
Within these Walls was broadcast from 1974 to 1978 and is unusual for two things. The first is that despite being broadcast at the height of wiping, there is only one episode missing. The other is that it gives much more attention to the staff of the women's prison it features than to the lives of the prisoners. It has been commercially released in its entirety if you're interested but luckily this episode has found its was on to YouTube. It's also famous for starring legendary actress Googie Withers, who unfortunately won't ever have one of these seasons dedicated to her because of the relative paucity of her television work.
The subject of Get the Glory Down is a very interesting one to me. The first part is about how one prisoner puts a curse on another prisoner who subsequently dies. The second half recounts how the prisoner who did the curse is so remorseful that she has a religious conversion, and given that she was very much top dog in the prison, the prisoners who always did do what she told them, then follow her in her religious beliefs and practices.
You would be correct if you jumped to the conclusion that the first part about the curse, sounds very much like the plot of one of those old horror films that take place in some far-flung part of the Empire where the primitives are dead primitive and there are endless zombies. This is an incredibly difficult thing to transplant to 1970s Britain, and an integral part of the plot is that the victim of the curse has not long come from Africa and the prisoner who cursed her is of African-Caribbean/Black British descent. The racial overtones of this make this a difficult episode because Black people are clearly depicted as naive, credulous, and so on. There's a lot of '"You people" have a different way of looking at things'.
As it happens Ann Way plays one of the characters who are obviously intended to stop the show being only a depiction of Black people as credulous, because she plays a white person who's credulous. It's a bit different from the other roles I've seen her in because it's not so dotty. She has the misfortune to being the cellmate to Luella who laid the curse, and obviously does all the work, but asks to be moved to another cell after it comes out about the curse. Ann's character is frightened of the curse and runs away.
It may be because of the show's focus on the staff (although they also seem to take everything the prisoners say at face value) but I have a criticism of this episode. This is that I'm surprised that an entire prison full of women take the word of a convicted conwoman at face value. Even the screws are more cynical about Luella than the prisoners are, and you'd really think they'd be more suspicious. But as I say this may be for narrative reasons. As it happens this episode was written by Peter Wildeblood, a journalist who was in a position to know about (admittedly men's) prisons because his imprisonment in 1954 for 'conspiracy to incite certain male persons to commit serious offences with male persons' was one of the cases which ultimately led to the decriminalisation of homosexuality in Britain. The idea of punishing a man for being sexually attracted to other men, by locking him up in a building full of other men who couldn't escape and hadn't even seen another woman in months or even years, muct have meant sense to somebody, but I expect that strange experience would affect subsequent writings about prison.
In fact I do really like the way the staff entirely hold the discussion of what is happening. There is quite a lot of discussion about the subject of the curse, the responsibility of the prison to the prisoners, ethical questions about the religious revival suddenly happening in their midst, what they can or should do about it given that it's being run by a convicted conwoman, and so on. In fact there is a lot in this episode to interest me, it's just that it is in a setting which I really don't like.
It also gives a slightly different role to our friend Ann Way, and honestly I really just wish we were told what she was in prison for, because it would make the character perfect!
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ivoryminitower · 2 months ago
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Echoes of Home: 20 - Tsu'na ("wall mart")
Echoes of Home: FFXIV AU OC – WoLs on Earth
I feel better now.  I am not worried that Husband does not love or want me.  I can wait for him to tell me his secret later.
I told Husband I wanted to go to the Stillwater wall mart, so he picked a place for our tent a few malms north of town.  We had slept in, so he thought we should walk to the wall mart before we did any mapping or harvesting.
We walked for more than an hour.  I saw many more cars than I have seen in Wyatt.  Most of them were going to or coming from what I thought was a city ahead of us.
We got close enough that I could see a sign that said "Walmart".  Husband led us to the gate of the city.  We went inside and I saw stacks of ingredients of different colors.  "This is the exchange district?"
"Exchange district?"
"Of this city."
Husband smiled. "No, my love.  This is a store."
"Do you mean all these tables belong to one merchant?"
"Kinda, yeah.  All of it."
"So what is in the rest of the city?"
"No, my love.  All of this, this building, is a store."
I looked around.  There was a street stretching off with smaller streets off of it.  "This whole building is one store?"
"Yes, my love."
"One could put all of Idyllshire in here!  Including the farming areas!"
"Yes, my love."
I could not stop looking around. "What does it sell?"
"Bits of everything.  They do that with the smaller towns...they come in and build one big store that's sort of the store for the town."
"They?"
"Walmart is a corporation.  They have lots of stores like this scattered around the country.  The ones closer to major cities tend to be a bit smaller."
I could not believe this store had everything.  I walked down the street and explored side streets.  It had everything.  There were cold glass cases which Husband said held frozen food.  "What does one do with frozen food?"
"Heat it up and eat it."
There was what looked like a malm of clothing hanging from racks.  The signs said there were districts for men, women, children and babies.  There was another district with televisions all showing different things.  One district had pots and pans and other things for the kitchen.  One district had paper of different colors, sizes and textures.  One district had tools, many of which I had never seen before.  One district was labeled "sports".  It had different size and shape balls and things that looked like weapons and armor.
Husband went to a place with a number of metal frames with two wheels.  He pulled one into the street and waved at me. "Here, my love, try sitting on this."
"What is it?"
"A bicycle.  Used for transportation."
We tried three "bicycles" until one did not pinch my tail.  Husband thought it was the right size when only my toes were touching the floor.  "Yeah, this should work, but I think it's too soon to go nuts again.  I'll check Amazon when we get back ho...to Wyatt."
Perhaps Wyatt is not home, or not yet home.  But then, home is where my husband is.
"So what did you want to find here?"
"The merchant at the thrift shop said there would be pillows here."
"Bedding.  Gotcha.  Looks like it's over there…"
So many things the same.  So many things different. "How are there so many recipes, Husband?"
"Most people in this world don't use recipes.  A lot of this stuff is made by machine.  They just set it up with the right sizes and colors and patterns and the machine just grinds them out."
I looked at stacks of folded towels and stacks of folded sheets and heaps of pillows in bins.  Much of everything was wrapped in "plastic", which Husband says is made from oil.  He picked some towels and sheets to buy, since we have been invited to stay in the Hartman house.
Past shelves of blankets was what looked like a fur.  It was as soft as a snurble.  I could not help rubbing my face in it.  "Husband, what kind of fur is this?"
"Artificial, I think."  He felt the edge of the blanket until he found a bit of cloth sticking out. "Yeah, polyester.  A kind of plastic."
"Can we have it for our bed?"
He looked at me holding it.  His eyes moved up and down. Perhaps he was thinking of me lying on it.  Perhaps he would think of us lying on it.
He tossed the towels and sheets onto a shelf. "Sure."
We explored more of the store before leaving.  Many things I did not know the words for.  I recognized the cleaning products in one street.  Another was full of soap.  Three streets had boxes and bottles of things Husband said were medicine.  One street had small things of many colors.
"Cosmetics.  Um...face paints, 'makeup'.  These are for lips, those are for eyelids, that's for cheeks…"
"Do you not have aestheticians here?"
"We do, but mostly for hair.  A lot of women apply their own makeup."
I looked at the tubes and boxes. "Would I be prettier with makeup, Husband?"
"Why mess with perfection?"
"Your test subject can experiment.  You can observe the pattern."
"Makeup or blanket?  Up to you, my love."
We paid for the blanket and left.  Husband spent some time around the cooking ingredients, then led us out of the store.  We walked another hour to what looked more like a market with a sign that read, "McIvers Farm Fresh Produce".  "This is better than Walmart?"
"Yeah, Walmart ships stuff in from anywhere, but this place gets produce from farms in the area.  If we find out where, we can maybe do our own gathering."
I looked at the bins of things while he talked with people.  Most bins had signs with the names.  Some were familiar.  Many times I saw many of something but they were all different.  Usually when we harvest the things we find all look the same.
Husband waved me over and handed me a basket of what looked like faerie apples, but more round.  He took another basket and we paid the merchant.  "What are these for?"
"Apple pie.  New menu item."
"Did you find where they are grown?"
"Orchard southeast of here.  I'm thinking of these as our fee for the information."
We got out of sight of the market and added the apples to our inventory, then got further away and Returned.  We walked to the Hartman house.  I spread the blanket out over the bed.  It fit well.  "We are home, Husband."
"Eh.  Home is where my wife is."
The blanket was very soft to lie on.
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depressedhatakekakashi · 4 months ago
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I must share another GOS image/ scene that lives rent free in my mind.
So this takes place shortly after Gai is turned into a dragon, and has isolated himself away inside a cave up high in the mountains. He's currently curled up on himself, and hasn't talked for a while, and through it all Kakashi has stayed by his side. It's raining hard outside because Kakashi is also distressed with what happened to his friend, but at least it's not flooding the land (he's learned how to control his emotions/ powers long ago...)
At some point Gai's eyes grow accustomed to the dark. Or maybe Kakashi is worried Gai is going to catch a cold/ Gai IS cold and he makes a fire to dry his friend off. Whatever the case he finally sees the old mural on the wall and... Gai hates it...
Gai:...It must annoy you...
Kakashi: *Shocked because Gai talked... and he can sort of understand him.* I don't mind taking care of you. *clean off the horns*
Gai: Not that... the pictures... they depict you as a man...
Kakashi: *blink...turns to look...realizes which cave they're in.*
Gai: A lot of humans like to make gods men or cover up women's accomplishments by giving it to a man... sorry that happened to you...
Kakashi:... That does happen to a lot of human women. Goddesses, however, don't tend to let that disrespect slide. More often than not it's a problem of ignorance. Not arogance. Despite what recent events might make you think, a mortal seeing a god's true form is an incredibly rare occurance. Most don't get to see our true forms so they don't know our genders instinctively. *moves to drying the mane* But more interesting...is that the mortal who drew this mural, knew me better than anyone, and he chose to draw me that way because he knew I'd love it.
Gai: *curius hum as Kakashi sits on his claw and right next to his muzzle.*
Kakashi: *raise hand at wall... a stream of water starts dropping down the wall beside the mural, creating the silhouette of two children* The real story, happened when the artist and I were both small children... and this is how it went down. *tells Gai how they met using water puppets on the wall. The water dries quickly on the stone letting him tell the full story... explain 1st Gai's reasoning when he made the mural. Of drawing Kakashi how he wanted to look, not how he was when he looked like a little girl back then*
Gai: ... * So glad he clarified things before destroying it like he thought he should*.......... should I...call you sir and use male pronouns with you for now on?
Kakashi: *smiles and leans against dragon face* Sir is much too formal between two old friends... but I would love the male pronouns, Gai.
Gai: *nods... gonna apologize later about previously using female pronouns earlier, when he's at least 3% less depressed* "Old friends?"
Kakashi: *nods* I'll explain later...
*end scene*
Also known as the time Kakashi came out as trans to his bestie a second time and told Gai the story of his first life XD. What do you think, did I get any of that right?
Ahhh, see, i don’t think Kakashi ever really comes out to gai in a way where he has to tell him that he’s actually male.
The way i’ve always had it, Kakashi doesn’t really question his identity until gai’s prince lifetime. He’s a god, gender is really not a concern to him and he doesn’t care too much about how people perceive him.
It’s when he meet Prince Gai and introduces himself as male, going with that look that first gai always portrayed him with, that he really realizes that he does care about his gender and that he identifies as male.
Before that he doesn’t really think of it, and thus never really had to tell Gai that he’s male, or what pronouns to use, because he has introduced himself to Gai this way (where as in his first two introductions he never specified a gender. He just told Gai his name and what he was the god of)
It’s really the other gods he ends up coming out to, specificlly Sakumo, The original three, Ibiki, Obito, Kaiyo and Rin.
Sakumo, Ibiki, Rin and Kaiyo are supportive and adjust without hesitation
Onito assures him that he’ll always just be ‘that dork of a brother’ regardless of his gender, which Kakashi finds oddly comforting
And the original three are kinda like ‘cool. Now onto other things’ cuz Kakashi isn’t the first god the choose a different gender (Kaiyo, Ino, Sai and Yamato all beat him to that) and they have a world to take care of
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