#captian levi

[xmads-omensx]

Just realised I’m going to have to re watch AOT for this fucking Levi fic that will probably never see the light of day.

Fuck.

[0yuri-chan0]

WAR IS OVER, WAR IS OVER!

LEVI GIVING CANDY TO THE KIDS ❤❤❤🙏😭

[lucysarah1875]

Y/N: crying her eyes out “I’ll never love anyone the way I loved him… I’m going to die alone.”

Levi: awkwardly trying to comfort her “You know, in the Underground we say… love is just around the corner.”

Y/N: sniffles “That’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.”

—Later, Levi talking to Hange in the hallway—

Levi: “I couldn’t bring myself to tell her the reason we say that… is because the corners are literally full of prostitutes.”

[m-jelly]

HI! May i request a smut canon levi fic x female y/n with some exhibitionism? Like maybe they're doing the naughty deed in a supply closet or something, like wall sex or floor sex with levi domming her? While they're at it, levi hears hange and erwin coming to the closet to get some things and he becomes worried for a sec, bbut then goes back to fucking y/n because why should he let his friends interrupt his fun time with his gf? So they walk in, get their stuff and leave and the whole time levi non-chalantly keeps up pleasuring y/n who's more embarrassed than him but goes with it because the pleasure is too good

please do this Only if you're comfortable! Thanks!

Keep quiet, brat, your moans are mine

Levi x fem reader

Canon AU, established couple, smut, almost getting caught, romance, dom Levi, possessive Levi, dirty talk.

Levi tries to keep you quiet as he ravages you in a dark corner of the large closet

The space was becoming hot, and a scent of arousal filled the air. All the moans escaping your lips were like the perfect song to his ears. Making love to you in a small space was the most incredible thing to Levi because he got to hear every little thing louder, it meant he could be so close to you.

Levi had you firmly pressed against the wall at the side of a stack of shelves. The two of you were hidden in a corner away from prying eyes, but you were noisy. He knew if anyone popped into the room, they wouldn't see you, but they would hear you.

His hands gripped tighter around your thighs, his lips on your neck as he sucked marks on you and his hips bucked hard and fast into you. He smiled against your skin as you clung so tightly to him, your toes squeezing tightly in pleasure and your pussy walls massaging him.

Your whimpers filled the room as you felt a rush of pleasure go through you, but Levi wasn't finished with you yet. He pressed you more against the wall as he slowed his movements and began savouring you as much as possible.

Levi's eyes flicked to the door when he heard Hange and Erwin's voices getting closer. A slight panic dug its nails into Levi, he didn't want people to listen to your moans. He shifted you a little, yanked off his cravat and tied it around your mouth. He'd changed his mind, he wanted you.

You whined a little. "Levi."

"People are coming, shh."

You moaned behind the cravat.

He leaned his head and whispered against your ear. "Be a good girl and stay quiet, your moans are mine."

You nodded and clung tightly to your man, this was so exciting and yet a little embarrassing. You trusted Levi with all your heart, you just hoped that you wouldn't be seen.

You felt flustered when you heard the voices of Hange and Erwin inside the room. You looked through the many shelves and saw the two of them moving around as they discussed a few things.

Levi turned your head to look at him. "Eyes on me, not on anyone else." He softly whispered against your ear. "You're mine."

You shook in his arms as you held back your moans, the pleasure was getting too much and you wanted to cry out, but you couldn't. You felt embarrassed that your boss was right on the other side of a few shelves and you were having passionate and naughty sex with your boyfriend, who was also known as the strongest.

"Good girl, just a bit longer." His voice was hot against your ear. "I love you." He gripped you tighter. "Shall I cum inside you with them right there?"

You shivered and pawed at him. You didn't know what to say, all you knew is you were close. You closed your eyes, leaned your head back and prayed the two would leave. You smiled as the door closed and the voices got quieter. You moaned against the cravat as you came hard.

Levi pressed deep into you and poured his cum into you. He moaned your name as he softly panted against your ear. "Fuck." He tugged the cravat down and smiled at you. "You're perfect."

You pouted a little. "You're naughty."

"A little." He chuckled. "I promise I'll take my time with you tonight."

You purred. "Good."

"Now, I need to cuddle you, clean you, kiss you and make sure you have all the care in the world."

@ladycheesington @levisbrat25 @nyxiieluna @li-anne @galactict3a @youre-ackermine @thebobaprincess @2moth-anon2 @cypidity @nbinairyn @bts-spnlvr12 @darkstarlight82 @emilyyyy-08 @levistealeaf @pelicanpizza @hideandgopeep @demonic-bird @searriously @dreamerofthewest @abiatackerman @minminroie

[angelanimedesaray]

Wings in the Dark Chapter 30: Stability

AN:  *Comes back after a year since this was written, grabs the old an about coming back with a bang and throws it in the trash, turns to the audience*

SO

I am a year or so or however long its been older and wiser and a pending bipolar and/or adhd diagnosis in limbo until I drag my ass to the doctor, cat got hit by a car, really bad financial drama happened at work that may have been the worst stressor ever we will NOT get into--THINGS HAPPENED!

And I know better than to make any promises with my fickleness, but i'm trying, this story is always in my brain (As well as a sw fanfic but that's not for here) and I have no intention of leaving this story untold, I even came back with new ideas to add to the space of five years between fall of the wall and appearance of Eren I was puzzling over when i went on hiatus. BUT we have all seen the patterns, I will go on hiatus' and randomly come back with more chapters. Hopefully this time I stick with it a bit longer, I had at least two chapters written before I disappeared, so you'll AT LEAST get those.

Oh, and before I turn it over to the content, year+ ago me wanted you to know I was getting back into writing the characters and to forgive characterization inconsistencies while I got back into it, this chapter went through 5 rewrites before it got to this state, and apparently had some whiplash with the song vibes as I was listening to Call of Silence from the OST and Till It Hurts by Yellow Claw on a two song repeat writing this last draft.

Also, new WITD divider image from saradika-graphics here on tumblr

Okay, have fun! I'm going to go work on chapter 32! I'll tell you where I'm at writing wise NOW when we get to that chapter O.o

Characters:  Levi, Vampire!Fem!Reader, Erwin, OC Vampire Character (Emery), Eld (Briefly)

Pairing:  Levi x Vampire!Fem!Reader

Warnings:  Language, Blood Drinking (Discussed), Spice but not Smut (Biting, Making Out, steamy stuff like that)

Word Count:  11922

<---Previous Chapter Masterlist Next Chapter---->

*Reader’s POV*

The state of the Underground hadn’t gotten any better since you’d last been here.

Not that you expected it to, the place reeked, was drenched in filth and stale air, and there were people lurking in the shadows that were either on death’s door or were leering at passerby’s waiting for someone that looked like an easy mark or seemed to have something worth taking.

While you and Emery traveled into the depths of the dark city, you glared at anyone that looked your way and thought the fresh and youthful faced Emery was an easy mark, easily scaring them off with your more imposing presence that threatened death at best if they tried to mark your companion for their crimes.  Emery, at least, seemed to have heard enough stories about the Underground, or had indeed taken to heart your many warnings and briefings on the way down here, and stayed a half step behind you the whole time despite his own vampiric strength being capable of keeping him safe from nearly every thug and shadowy individual the two of you passed.

It was a good thing you’d been careful to teach him how to block out sensory information before delving down here–he’d only gagged seven times since coming down here when his concentration slipped, which wasn’t bad at all.

As you reached the darker depths of the Underground, the places where the shadows loomed darker, the mud never truly dried, and a presence of dread pressed upon passerbys, you gestured for Emery to follow you into one of the abandoned buildings a couple blocks in, allowing the two of you at least a moment to pause and make sure you were both prepared for what came next.

Namely, Emery.

When you turned to look at him, you could see even in the shut in darkness of the empty warehouse how pale he looked, and not just from thirst.  There was a tremble in his hand, and he swallowed painfully loudly when your gaze met his.

“I don’t want to do this,” Emery hissed softly into the darkness.  He’d been gradually getting worse as the days passed, and you had discovered he’d been preying on birds and squirrels and other small animals that happened to be in the immediate area around the cave in an attempt to keep himself satiated.  However, there wasn’t enough to keep the thirst at bay, and eventually he’d had no choice but to relent and follow you to satisfy the craving.  That didn’t mean that he fully agreed.  Or that he was willing.  He was just running out of options, and the hunger was starting to take precedence, even over his morality.

Considering he was digging in his heels again, though, that resistance was still there.

You sighed, running your fingers through your hair under your cloak as you gazed back at the terrified young man.  “Emery, we’ve been through this–”

“No, I know what you’re going to say, but I can’t do this, I don’t want to kill anyone,” Emery hissed back in the darkness, panic coloring his tone.

“I understand that, believe me, I do–”

“No, you don’t, not really, otherwise you wouldn’t be pushing me to do this, you wouldn’t have done this yourself, I don’t want to be a monster–” Emery panicked, starting to work himself into hysterics.  You had to get a grasp on this before it spiraled out of control.

Burying the slash of pain in your chest at the statement calling you and what you’d done to survive in the past monstrous, you carefully stepped up to the young man who was starting to hyperventilate in front of you, placing gentle hands on his arms to try and soothe him.  “Emery, breathe…deep breaths…you need to settle down, before you draw attention to us,” you told him seriously but in as gentle of a tone as you could manage, trying to catch his gaze as it darted around at your surroundings.

You’d been slowly refining this speech for this moment, specifically, and you sincerely hoped that it was going to be good enough to convince him, this time.

“I do understand, because I’ve been where you’re at, right now.  And in the past I was so scared of myself and of hurting–killing–other people, I tried to die before I could.  Clearly it didn’t work, but…I do understand that fear,” you said steadily, feeling a brief flash of relief when Emery looked at you with wide eyes at the little bit of yourself you offered him to get him to see that you did, in fact, understand the feelings he was struggling with.  “I don’t want to make you a monster or a murderer, Emery.  I’m trying to help you avoid that, in the long run.  But right now, it can’t be helped.  You have to drink to survive.  But you don’t have the control for a donor even if I could find you one, the forest animals aren’t enough for you to live on, and the animals not only are vital to the people starving because of a food shortage right now, but as long as you’re drinking from them, you’re never going to be able to learn the control to be around people again without being a threat to them.  It’s ugly, and dark, and messy, and bloody, but you have to go through this stage first before you can get better.”

You squeezed his shoulders in reassurance, making sure to hold his gaze.  “You don’t have to go through this alone like I did, though.  I’m here to help you, okay?  You’ll get through this, and eventually you won’t have to kill to survive anymore.  But you have to get through this part, first, and that’s what I’m trying to help you do, but you have to let me.”

Emery’s eyes seemed to shine even in the darkness, expression distraught and lost as his shoulders sagged under your hands.  “I can’t…I can’t take hurting anyone else.  I can’t do it…”

Your heart throbbed, looking up and around at the warehouse around you as if it might give you answers, while the teenager in front of you struggled not to sob with the enhanced despair crushing down on his too-pure soul for this bloody life.

There was no way you were going to get him to hunt on his own tonight.  He wasn’t capable of that same thing you could do where you could mentally and emotionally distance yourself from the kill, compartmentalize it into a dark bloody box in the recesses of your mind and let it hurt like a dull ache at the bottom of your heart when your thoughts wandered to its contents.  But he needed blood, or he was going to get dangerous, and he needed to start learning this so he could be more self-sufficient.  You couldn’t keep leaving him to small fuzzy animals in the wilds and the dark solitude of a cave, which was all he would get if he didn’t make this step.

…you could at least meet him halfway.  He wasn’t ready to do this himself, wasn’t ready for a kill, was in no state for it tonight and probably wouldn’t be for some time still.  But there were still things you could do to compromise, to help him make progress without pushing him to do this thing he was terrified to do, and justifiably.

You could save the philosophical discussion about killing to survive and if vampires killing for the blood they needed to live fell into that grace area or not another time, when he was well fed and you weren’t standing in an abandoned building in one of the more dangerous parts of the Underground.  Right now, you just had to get him to feed.

“Okay.  I’m not going to make you do something you can’t do, Emery,” you tell him softly, and his shaking, half sobbed breaths caught for a moment at the statement.  You didn’t judge him for how quickly he fell into tears and sobs, knowing he was still struggling with the emotional control and this was, after all, a highly charged and emotional topic–and he was, immortal or not, a literal kid–a teenager.  “But you still need to learn to hunt properly, and we need to start actively teaching you control.  I’ll do the dirty work tonight.  I’ll teach you how to do the hunt, you’ll do most of it under my supervision, but I’ll make the kill and you can have the blood afterwards.  It will still be good long enough for you to take what you need, it takes a little while for the blood to go stagnant and…sour, so to speak, to dead man’s blood.”

Emery still looked ill, but he recognized this compromise you were offering him for the gift it was.  Not having to do the act itself…he would still be complicit, yes, but at least his hands wouldn’t be directly bloody.  That’s what you were thinking, anyway, why you offered it.

“I don’t know if I can…choose who lives and dies like that,” Emery said in a hushed tone, though his shaking had eased and he seemed to be calming down.

“Then I’ll pick the target–this time.  I’ll show you how it’s done, and you just watch…you don’t have to watch me kill them, though.  Just be ready to hurry over to start drinking before the blood can go stale.  Deal?” you compromised again.

Emery hesitated.  He was far too gentle.  Whoever had made this poor kid into a vampire was cruel, putting someone with this much kindness and passivity in his heart into this position where he had to spill blood to survive, where being around people tempted him to go into a blood haze, to rend and murder anyone in its path, until he could gain control of his new alien bloodlust.

Gentle hearts did not mix well with vampirism.  This wasn’t going to be easy for him.  In fact, it was likely to be more hellish on the heart and soul for Emery than it had been for you.  After you had turned, you'd gradually discovered steel in your spine and fire in your heart; that you could be sharp as a blade and hard as the walls when you needed to survive.  Either Emery didn't have that at all, or he just hadn't found it yet.

Hopefully the latter was the case, for both your sakes.

“Okay,” he murmured in a voice so soft you almost didn’t hear it.  He seemed to go weak in the knees after agreeing, like his agreement to the bloodshed had been some kind of physical blow.

You gave him an awkward pat on the shoulder before you released him, keeping an eye on him to make sure he wasn’t going to sway and topple over once you let him go before you turned your attention back to the Underground that stretched out around you outside the abandoned building.

“We’ll talk more about survival and morality and everything else, later.  First…I’ll get you some blood,” you murmured, steps sure all the way to the doorway, waiting until Emery reluctantly fell into step behind you before your footsteps turned into a hunter’s prowl, and you started the ritual you hadn’t needed to execute since Levi had offered you the alternative you wished desperately to give the gentle-hearted kid you’d been teaching the past few weeks.

Later.  You could reflect on this later.  For now…the hunt.

*Levi’s POV*

She was back much earlier than he’d been expecting.

Levi had gone through his tea a lot faster than normal, already on the third cup and having switched from regular black tea to poking through his options once or twice to try and find something that would help him stay awake and alert like he wanted but would also help calm down his damn nerves.  He was seated at one of the corner tables that gave him a better chance at being overlooked by any late night visitors, one hand continued to fill out the paperwork he’d brought to distract him between the page turns and the time it took him to read what was in front of him, while the other traced along the rim of his freshly made cup of tea, still fresh enough that steam wafted into the air a few shades lighter than the smoke burning from the candle flame.  He’d found it ridiculously difficult to focus on his paperwork, yet his gaze kept flickering to the candle shedding the light he was working by, unable to stop looking as it slowly melted, tracking each half hour that she was down there in the Underdark.  It felt like he was hyper aware of every minute that slipped by, which made it frustratingly difficult to successfully distract himself with his work while he waited for her return.

He had yet to successfully distract himself and stop glancing over at the candle when she did appear, still wrapped up in her plain cloak with a deep frown marring her features as she stepped inside, immediately garnering Levi’s attention.

“What the hell are you doing back so early?” Levi asked, paperwork quickly forgotten at the sight of her.  The only reasons she would be back this early was if something had gone very wrong, or if things had progressed much faster and smoother than she had been anticipating.

Given their track record with the Underground, Levi wasn’t going to get his hopes high that it was anything other than bad.

Y/N’s gaze flickered over to him, but she didn’t deviate from her course towards the kitchens.  “Let me get something to drink, first, and I’ll tell you what happened,” she offered.

As she passed, Levi did a quick glance over her just to make sure she was at least outwardly fine.  No blood on her cloak, though she usually washed away any she may have gotten on her before returning to headquarters, she wasn’t moving strange, there wasn’t anything that looked scuffed or dirty, she didn’t seem to be hurt–aside from the frown, she seemed fine, which was a bit of consolation despite the concern her early return and the frown on her face stirred up.

Even though he could see that outwardly, physically, she was fine, he still didn’t wait.  She’d barely entered the kitchen before he decided he was going to follow, getting up to enter the kitchen after her, where she had already discovered the tea kettle Levi had been using, teacup in hand and ready to start making herself the usual cup of chamomile.

Levi crossed the room before she could even finish turning around to face him, a bit of surprise on her face when she found him already in her personal space, one of his hands reaching out to cover her hand resting on the teacup, keeping both hand and cup still against the counter while keeping her in place as his other hand reached out to brace against the counter on her other side.  He studied her closer, attempting to gauge from her eyes and the way she was acting just how bad it had been.

“Tell me what happened,” Levi said, firm enough to be borderline a command, but soft enough that his voice betrayed the worry that was spurring on the inquiry that couldn’t even wait for her to brew a cup of tea.

Y/N’s startled expression only stayed for a few more moments before it softened, a hand coming up to rest on his cheek with her fingertips curling gently along his jawline to soothe him.  It did work a bit–he couldn’t help the way he reacted to the touch, the warmth and the comfort that started to spread through him at such a tender gesture–though it didn’t erase the worry coursing through him.

“Nothing serious happened, Levi, not in the way you’re probably thinking right now,” she soothed him, though his tension didn’t melt away due to the spark of worry she couldn’t hide in her eyes–there was still something to be concerned about.  “There weren’t any hunters, there weren’t any hitches in the hunt itself, no other vampires crept up–nothing serious like that.”

“But something still happened,” Levi deadpanned, gaze unwavering from her own, especially since it kept giving her away–the flash of unease at his statement, for example.  Her eliminating other vampires and hunters and remarking that the hunt went smoothly meant that it had to be Emery, based on what information Levi did have.

Did the bloodlust come a little too easily for her to be comfortable?  Did she get more confirmation of his ripper tendencies?  She spoke highly of the kid’s character, or at the very least kept reiterating how he was tender and gentle and good hearted, but Levi had not–and she had better not–forgotten what he was capable of, the potential violence he could grow into and the kind of real monster it could breed.  All the kindness and even personal bonds in the world wasn’t enough in the face of a vampire’s first years of thirst, as Y/N’s gruesome story of how she’d been turned and the butcher Emery had caused at the scent of blood bleakly attested to.

Standing this close to her, he could still smell a faint whiff of the Underground on her, and alongside it, the faintest hint of blood.  Something he didn’t expect to catch on her if Emery was the one that was supposed to be doing the killing.

Before he could finish making the connections, she finally spoke up, sighing wearily before she let her hand trail down from his cheek to rest gently over his heart, the other hand still trapped within Levi’s own against the counter.

“Emery couldn’t do it, so I had to,” she finally said.  “I don’t know how much of a role his heightened emotions that he still hasn’t gotten control of play in it, how much of it is stalwartly at his core, but he’s just too…soft-hearted.  Normally I say being a gentle person isn’t a bad thing, but in this case he just…started to shatter on the spot, fell right into hysterics, could not do it, so I had to compromise.  Told him to watch and try to learn what I was doing, but I would do the actual hunt and he could reap the results so he’s not still starving up in that mountain.”

She looked off to the side where the tea kettle was still sitting as she spoke.  “I don’t know what I’m going to do if he can’t get past this, make this work in a way for him that will allow him a bit of self sufficiency when it comes to his survival.  I’m not even sure how to teach him this if this is my starting point, I wasn’t expecting it to be at this point.  If he can’t get past this, if he continues to outright refuse like he did tonight…I can’t hunt for him forever, he can’t feed on animals, he won’t be able to compel anyone for decades–I can’t even do that yet.  I’m not sure what to do with him, now.”

Levi had listened closely through her explanation, studying her quietly and turning over the information she gave him in his mind as he considered what he should say, taking care to try and figure out the right words to use considering this was a topic that touched on some sensitive topics she was still carrying around with her.  Since she was still looking away as she finished speaking, Levi reached out to gently grasp her chin and tilt her head back towards him, thumb briefly stroking side to side across her chin.

On the one hand, the news was quick to rile his anger, gaze narrowing slightly to hear that she had needed to take matters into her own hands and get even more blood on them, even though she was supposed to be finally free of taking human life to survive with Levi providing her blood, instead.  She was supposed to be working to wash the blood off like she had told him was part of her intention for being here, now that she wasn’t adding any more–or wasn’t supposed to be, anyway.  They’d been arguing about the risk to her going back Underground, how much danger it put her in–Levi hadn’t even brought up how crucial of a part she was starting to play in the Scouts and how putting her in danger was also threatening to deal a harsh blow to the Scouts and their improving death rates arguably when it mattered most that they continue to progress.  She was taking these risks, putting herself back in danger, now getting more blood on her hands to try and help this kid, and he wasn’t making an attempt to make this work?  She wasn’t talking about backing out, she was upset about not knowing what to do next to help him.  If she kept going down there and doing this for the young vampire, if she kept putting herself in increasing danger and he continued to refuse to follow what she was trying to teach him…

He could see this ending very badly if it continued in this direction, and could see her bearing the brunt of it.  But he could also see why she was doing it, why she was still inclined to find a way to make it work.  What she saw of this kid told her that he was a good kid–too good, ironically, since therein lay the crux of the issue–and it was a reassurance that he didn’t take human life so lightly, that it was something he was truly struggling with…

But it wasn’t so cut and dry.  Emery’s decisions about this were going to have an impact far beyond him, were going to affect Y/N, and by extension the Scouts.  And if he didn’t learn to control himself, didn’t put in the work–as bloody as it was–to get to a similar place as Y/N, then a lot of people–more innocent people–were going to suffer and die along the way for it, either directly or indirectly.  There wasn’t really a good choice here, but when the hell was there?  The choice the kid had in front of him was to either learn to control himself, not hurt as many people, and try to direct the carnage away from the more innocent until he developed the control and connections to get to a similar place as Y/N in the future, or he could continue to refuse, never really learning how to control his thirst, any human that bleeds around him always under great threat, some even just needing to get near him to be in danger, and Y/N possibly suffering deadly consequences for it–Levi could lose her along that path despite having just started to really have her in his life, not to mention the Scouts and Humanity would lose their best weapon against the titans and chance for more people surviving in that worse case scenario.

Levi knew exactly what choice Emery should make, in Levi’s mind–Levi would have already made it by now if he could.  The second choice wasn’t an option Levi was going to accept, at least not to that extent.  It didn’t make the first choice right, per say–Levi and Y/N had already had the complicated discussions about her old diet, and Levi had already made his feelings on the matter clear back then.  But Levi wasn’t going to let the situation develop to the point that many people suffered for the inaction of one teenage vampire.  And if Emery wanted to follow along the second path, then Y/N wasn’t going to get caught in the crossfires for it, she’d have to cut her losses before the situation got any worse.

Levi’s hand tightened around Y/N’s as he came to his resolution, gaze roaming over her features.  This could easily become another fight...

“You’re not going to have to hunt for him anymore,” Levi said decisively.  Y/N’s gaze turned wary in the face of the hard edge in Levi’s eyes, and Levi let go of her chin and pushed away, taking the teacup that had been in her hand in the process as he headed over to the tea kettle.

“I will if I can’t get him out of his own head and convince him to actually hunt, which was what I was trying to do before we went out today…not that it worked.”

Levi took a few seconds to start making her tea for her, giving himself the little extra time to put the right words together.

“You see yourself in him,” Levi stated, simply summing up the conversation they’d had the night they’d returned from the chaos of the fall of Wall Maria.  “You want to treat him gently, because you wish someone had been there for you that way when you first turned.”

Her silence was enough confirmation for him to continue.

“But you can’t.  Back then, there was only you at stake.  For him, there’s a hell of a lot more damage that’ll be done if this goes south,” Levi said flatly, coming back over to where she was standing to hand her the cup.  She took it wordlessly, but the look on her face was…less than pleased.  Well, she wasn’t going to get any happier with what else he had to say.

“He’s not you, and you’re not him, so stop comparing.  You were able to figure out your situation and make quick choices to survive and stuck with it, took the consequences.  He’s indecisive and dragging his feet, making a shitstorm that could affect a hell of a lot more people.  He doesn’t need coddled right now.  He needs to get a face-full of the reality of the situation he’s in and make a choice.  That way you know if you need to get out before you pay for it, or if he’s going to step up and put in some effort to survive.”

Y/N hesitated, both hands curled around her cup.  “I don’t want to push him too hard too fast, it’s always like he’s a few seconds away from shattering.  And it’s hard to be harsh with him, knowing what he’s going through, how terrifying it all is.”

We’re all just a bunch of bleeding hearts, it seems.

Levi sighed, folding his arms across his chest and leaning back against the table behind him, fixing his stare on her.  “If you won’t give him a reality check, then I will.”

Her head snapped up at that, gaze a lot sharper and focused now, eyes narrowed on him.  “I thought we were done having the discussion of why that’s a bad idea, and you going anywhere near him isn’t going to happen?”

“The situation’s changed.  Again.  If you don’t want to push him, then someone else needs to step in and do it.  I’m the obvious choice.”

As always, at this rate.

“Levi–”

“No,” Levi cut her off, tone a bit harsher than he intended.  “It’d be safer if I wasn’t around him, he doesn’t have control, I know, you’ve made all that clear.  He already knows you have a human…” Levi paused, not sure he knew what the hell to label himself in this situation.  “...whatever, and part of the reason you’ve been allowed to go forward with this is your insistence you can control him.”

“I’m not setting up a meeting between you two.  It’d be too dangerous, too unpredictable and–”

“And the titans aren’t?” Levi snapped back.  “If I can handle you in a spar, I can handle the kid.  Between the two of us, we can manage if he loses his shit.”

He wasn’t insane enough to go alone, otherwise he’d have just done it himself already.  And the two of them were the best equipped to handle vampires.  Sure, there were all kinds of ways it could go, but if both of them were there and prepared to do damage control, they had a better chance of keeping the situation contained with little to no fallout.

And this would give him the chance to size up Emery for himself and get a good read on the kid.

“I’m not dangling you in front of Emery with how little control he has–he may not even be capable of listening to you around any bloodlust he ends up having, which would defeat the whole point of you meeting him.”

“If you want to help this kid, I can’t go to Erwin with ‘it didn’t go well, the kids refusing to learn, Y/N doesn’t know what to do’.  Erwin will cut the loss,” Levi said flatly.  “You’ve been trying to prepare him for this your way–it didn’t work.  Even if he ends up too blood crazy to speak to, I can’t give you any better advice until I see for myself.”

The two of them had a stare down in silence for several long moments, waiting to see who would back out, first.  Levi wasn’t going to budge.  He’d let her try, let her have her way, they’d scrapped over it, he’d relented, but now…now, she really did need him involved if this was going to work.  She was being far too gentle with Emery at the moment.

Not that Levi didn’t pity the poor kid.  Y/N had been an adult when she was turned, albeit barely.  This kid was in the middle of his teenage years, which probably didn’t help with the erratic emotions.  And it truly was a shit situation to be in, to be a freshly turned vampire–even worse at a time like this with the recent fall of a wall and massive food shortage.  But pitying the situation wasn’t going to do anything to get him out of it, and pity wasn’t going to do shit in making sure the kid wasn’t frozen up decision wise anymore and not putting himself and Y/N at risk.

“Fine.  Fine.” Y/N finally relented, looking away and taking a long drink out of her cup, looking more frustrated than Levi had seen her in a while.  “But we’re doing it my way.  How we arrange and go about it, I mean,” she added when she saw Levi was about to correct her.  Giving Emery a reality check was going to be done Levi’s way.

“Sooner, not later,” Levi stressed.

“I know, just…give me time to give him the heads up first, try to talk about what happened and tell him you’re going to be coming to meet him, because of how…poorly, it went.”

“I’ll make sure you have free time today to go see him.”

“And when you two do meet, we’ll do it during the day, so you can have the added protection of the sun.  You can stand outside the cave, and he won’t be able to come near you, not even if he was in a blood frenzy.  Though it’ll also be more of a trip, since we’re headed up a mountain on the northwestern side of Wall Sina.”

“We can get an official excuse set up with Erwin.”

A silence fell over the room between them, Y/N continuing to sip on the tea.  He still had his in the other room, and paperwork, but there were more personal things he wanted to do and say with her…They probably needed to leave the mess hall, anyway.  It was only an old habit that had Levi set up here to wait for her this time, but if Emery got over his indecision and they kept going to the Underground while he learned, then in the future…

“Let me get my shit, and we’ll head up to my office.  Last thing we need is some moon eyed rookie wandering in while we’re talking,” Levi said to break the silence, getting up to head back to the dining area.  Y/N finished her tea and shadowed him without hesitation, staying a couple steps behind along the way.  

Levi started to gather up the paperwork, trying to get the tea he’d left sitting by the papers down before they left and while there was still heat to it.  As he did, Y/N came up behind him, her hand brushing gently along his back and remaining on his shoulder blade as she leaned over beside him, helping him gather up the candles and a fair share of his stack.

Levi felt a little of his inner tension drain away at the touch and gesture.  She wasn’t angry at him, then, and no fight.  Some resistance, some frustration…but no fight.  Good…good, she understood, she accepted it, they weren’t going to have to muscle through another rocky spot with each other.  She was going to accept the help.

She had asked.  She might not like the way he was going to help, but she had asked for help when she opened up to him about not knowing what to do about the situation.

“Do you want help with some of this?”

Levi glanced over at the half of the stack she had in her hand.  It was a lot of paperwork, he’d left enough to keep him busy through the night on purpose.  But he needed to actually take in the information, put his own signature on things…

“No.”

She looked at him, studying his expression as he leaned over to add the small stack he’d already worked through on top.  As he straightened, she leaned over to kiss his cheek, holding the stack in her arms tighter to her.

“I’ll just help where I can fill in information, then,” she mused, already pulling away to start walking now that they had everything gathered between the two of them.

“Tch…”

But he didn’t say she shouldn’t, and the sound of protest was soft.  He didn’t actually mind…it was a good excuse for her to stay a bit longer.

The hour was still late enough that their trip from the mess hall to Levi's office was undisturbed, a comfortable silence between them as they traversed the halls.  Once inside, Levi still made sure that the door was locked behind them to make sure no one could interrupt, just in case.  He didn't expect anyone to come knocking at this time of night if Y/N was already here, but with their track record, he'd rather be safe than sorry.

Levi and Y/N both made their way to his desk, setting their respective piles on the surface before they took seats at opposite sides of the desk. Levi shook his head at her insistence to pitch in with his paperwork, but didn't protest, and they fell into a comfortable routine surprisingly fast.

There were the usual finished and unfinished stacks, of course, but Y/N had also created smaller stacks by the unfinished pile, one that was paperwork she'd filled out for him but still needed read or signed, and another for pages she couldn't help with.  As they both added to or took from the piles, their knuckles would occasionally brush against one another, fingertips lingering the few times she handed him a document when they would finish at the same time.

Levi found the work going by much faster, more comfortably, with her there…and not just because she was doing a small portion of it for him.  The pages went by faster, the work didn't feel so tiring, and suddenly there were only a few stray papers in the piles she'd sorted for him left to do.  Y/N had wandered over to the couch once she'd done what she could, laying down with a soft whoosh of air that barely resembled a sigh.  She didn't speak while Levi continued to work, the candlelight growing smaller and the shadows longer until Levi decided enough was enough.  What remained were pages he could do in the morning, there were other things he could be doing right now–and wanted to do.

Levi carefully removed his cravat, fingers brushing against the bandage he'd forgotten was hidden beneath.  It definitely stopped bleeding by now, he could probably take the damned thing off.

It was a slight detour, but he came back minus a jacket, cravat, and bandage, the small bite wound properly cleaned up and hardly noticeable, and Y/N was still stretched out on the couch, having not made a sound or so much as twitched.

…Dammit, she's asleep, isn't she?

Levi didn't even have to come all the way around the couch to confirm it, he could peer over the edge and see that she was passed out asleep, lips parted, head turned into the cushions and pillowed under one arm, breathing slow and deep.

So much for spending a bit of one on one time together before getting some sleep.  He’d been hoping to have a bit of time to set aside business and the serious stuff and simply reassure himself that she was all right and with him, but if this was the most he would get…

His sigh was admittedly a disappointed one, even as he leaned against the edge of the couch with folded arms and watched her for a few moments.  How comfortable did she have to be around him to fall asleep on the not-that-comfortable couch that quickly, and with so little fuss?

She’d come a long way to get where she was now.  To go from scared barely adult just turned vampire driven underground, to now a cornerstone member of the Scouts (even if it was behind closed doors, only), improving the safety of the formations so they didn’t lose as many people, making plans that actually sounded plausible with Hange to help them capture and learn more about titans, she had friends, she had him–whatever they were, Levi still didn’t know what to label it.  She’d come here to find a way to make her abilities as a vampire helpful to other people, to make the lives she’d had to take in order to survive and stay strong enough to survive worth something, and so far, it seemed she was in step with that goal.

And he wasn’t going to let anyone threaten to destroy that progress, not when she’d crawled her way here over the past few decades and was just starting to get a taste of freedom and happiness again, despite the insanity of all the ways the world seemed to be going to shit right now.

Levi straightened up from the couch and made his way over by the door, where his Scout cloak was hanging up.  He snatched it off its hook without even looking, coming back over to where Y/N had passed out on his couch and carefully throwing it over the sleeping woman’s shoulders, taking the time to make sure that it was arranged in a way that would be comfortable for her and actually keep her warm.  His hand lingered briefly on her shoulder, gazing at her still sleeping form for a few seconds before he made himself pull away, heading over to the desk to finish off those last few pages of paperwork he would have made wait for morning if she’d still been awake.  Hopefully, when he finished, he’d be able to catch a few hours of sleep, himself. 

He did, of course, finish his paperwork not long after his discovery that Y/N had fallen asleep, and after making sure the fire would last a bit longer into the night and everything was where it needed to be, he had settled back into the chair behind his desk, closing his eyes and simply listening to the soft sound of her breaths in the room and the crackle of the fire.  He didn’t even notice when the moment of peace turned to drowsiness, or how quickly he fell asleep after those first few content moments just listening and relishing the moment.

When he started to come to again, it was to the crackle of a fresh fire, the faintest aroma of black tea leaves in the room, the pouring of water and light chink of porcelain, soft, barely heard steps and movements…

Levi was still lifting his head, still coming to a full awareness of the room around him when the steps drew closer, and the lightest touch brushed across his shoulder, causing him to tense for the first few heartbeats that he didn’t know where it was coming from before the familiar voice followed the tender touch.

“Good morning,” Y/N’s voice said softly just off to his side, causing Levi to blearily blink open his eyes to peer up at her, squinting against the light but relaxing against her touch once he realized it was her.  He felt her lips press gently against the top of his head, feeling a warmth slowly settle over him at the affection that made it a little more difficult to shake off the morning grogginess.

His neck was a little stiff from how he’d been sleeping slouched over in his chair.  He was also realizing that something was draped over him, giving him a thin shield against the chill of the room until the fire warmed it again, hand rising underneath it to discover the familiar feel of his cloak against his fingers.  She must have put it around him in turn when she’d woken up.

“I just started heating up water for tea, it shouldn't be too long,” she continued in her quiet tone, and Levi hummed in response, leaning into the gentle touch upon his shoulder blade now that he realized it was her.  He could certainly use the tea right now, he might have actually gotten a couple hours last night, and it was taking him a few seconds to shake himself out of the sleepy, guard down stupor.

Speaking of last night…

Levi started to sit up, hair tickling along his eyebrows, one hand tugging the cloak down, allowing it to fall to his lap.  “You fell asleep before I could finish my work,” he rumbled, voice still sounding gruff even to his ears from just waking up.

What time was it?  How much later than normal was it?  His paperwork was done, at least, but he had meetings he had to do with Erwin now, training they still had to go through, coordinating with Y/N later about the Emery situation…

Depending on how much he’d slept in, he didn’t have the time to do what he’d been hoping for last night.  If she hadn’t fallen asleep, he could have spent a couple hours with her winding down from the day without any work in the way, but now, the day was already calling–especially because he may be running behind.

Y/N’s hand slipped away from his shoulder, her footsteps moving away from him and likely over to finish making the tea.  “I didn’t mean to–I guess I just got too comfortable?  One minute I was just listening to you and the next–”

It was too soon after waking up to be trying to navigate to the right words right now.  She thought he was complaining about her sleeping in his office?  Even though he’d already allowed her to use his bedroom for her recoveries to be in peace in the past?  And they’d both stayed in these quarters during his own recovery?

Levi’s hand threaded through his hair, brushing it out of his face and resting his head in his hand while his gaze relocated and tracked her as she moved around to make the tea.  His other hand draped the cloak out of the way on the back of his chair for the time being.

“I didn’t say you couldn’t,” he corrected her in a low mumble.  “Falling asleep here was fine–if you needed the rest, then knock yourself out.”

…he didn’t mind when she fell asleep in here.  He liked having her close, and seeing her that relaxed and comfortable in his presence had been…well, like many of the moments with her, it had been warm, and gave him a little taste of a content feeling, even if she wasn’t awake to engage with him like he’d been hoping for.  But he relished in the quiet moments of companionship and peace her presence tended to bring, and that was the important part.

So long as she wasn’t obvious enough about it for people to figure out she was staying in his quarters instead of her own, he wouldn’t mind if it became a regular thing–he thought he may relish it, as well.

“Oh?” she asked.  Her back was to him, so he couldn’t see how she was reacting to what he told her.  He could just study her posture, the way she shifted her feet, the slight tilt of her head–she was acting casual, but he was fairly certain she was about to fish for more.  “Then…what has you disgruntled?  Besides just waking up, I mean.”

“Tch.”

The small noise was mostly drowned out by the huffed sigh he let out at the question, momentarily agitated that she was catching onto his residual disappointment in missing out on his plans for the night before.  His fingers unthreaded from his hair, propping up his chin instead as she finally turned around to face him.

“I had shit I was going to do once you got back,” he grumbled, unable to help but sulk a little at the thought.  If she hadn’t come back so early it had required an immediate discussion, if they hadn’t gotten busy with the paperwork, if she hadn’t fallen asleep afterwards…he’d just wanted more than just a few moments to hold her close to him, kiss her, reassure himself that she was okay, and take his sweet time doing it.

She came over to stand by his desk again, offering him the fresh cup of tea without a word, which Levi took carefully from her, fingers brushing gently, briefly, against hers as he examined the color, giving it a few more seconds to finish steeping before he took a sip.

She may have rushed putting it together a little, but it was as good as she usually made it.

She moved to lean against his desk, drawing Levi’s gaze sidelong to her with the teacup paused a few inches away from a second drink.  “You know, you could…do whatever you wanted to last night, now.  We have a bit of time.  Maybe not as much, but still, some.”

…She may have a point.  He didn’t have the time now to do as much, he couldn’t hold her however long he felt like it, afterwards, he had things he needed to start doing, since he may already be off to a late start.  That didn’t mean he couldn’t do anything though.  He could prioritize what he wanted the most, something that would get him by until they had the chance again, and steal a few moments before starting the day–he already had a late start, anyway, and it was a day that started when he decided.  What was a few more stolen moments at the start?

Levi set his teacup aside, making sure it was well out of the way and not in danger of being knocked over as he turned to face her more fully, gaze roaming over her as he debated how he wanted to use the time they still had before the day’s work demanded their attention.  He couldn’t just hold her to him in the silence of the room as long as he would want, but he could pull her close, feel how real and solid she was against him, reassure himself she was okay and things were good between them, not tense and strained.

His hand reached out for her sleeve to tug her closer to him, guiding her around the desk and over to where he was still seated behind the desk.  Once she was easily within his arm’s reach, Levi pulled her to him with a bit more strength, hearing her gasp as she was pulled in, his arm wrapping around her waist to hold her tightly to him as she fell into him.  She caught herself, keeping her balance with her knee laying across his lap and her other foot stretched out behind her to keep herself stable, her hands placed instinctively against his chest to assist in keeping her balance with the close proximity.  Once she was where he wanted her, he reached out to thread his hand into her hair, feeling the strands slip against his fingers as his hand came to rest against the warmth of her cheek, coaxing her forwards even as he tilted her head the way he needed her to be as he went in for a kiss.

This one wasn’t one of the timid, brief kisses that had filled much of their days recently–he went in with a fervor much like their first, or on the couch the evening prior.  It was that closeness he wanted, and if he craved that physical reassurance that she was okay–was going to be okay–then he wanted to feel that liveliness between them when he kissed her like this.  Where he couldn’t get enough of it, wanted more, and even surprised himself with how badly he seemed to need it.

Keeping her cradled close and secure against him, Levi could feel the surprise from the intensity that he came at her with in her lack of an initial response in those few seconds, where he was the one pouring all of the desire into the kiss with each needful press of his lips against hers.  He might have pulled back if she had stayed still a moment longer, but when she seemed to come out of her surprise at his sudden fervent attention, she returned every ounce of that passion, stealing his breath in kind.  Her hands slowly slide up the sides of his neck, causing a slight shiver down his neck before her fingers ran lightly against his undercut and up into his own hair in a grip that kept him locked–without complaint–in the kiss, her fingers teasing along the outer curves of his ears and her thumb tracing idly back and forth along his jaw.

His breath hitched at the tender touch, lips parting involuntarily with a gasp he was trying to keep down.  Throwing away any pretense of trying to kiss her in some kind of ‘right way’, his fingers dug deeper into her hair in response, and the sound was swallowed up as he deepened the kiss.  He didn’t care about kissing her in a ‘right way’ at the moment as much as he did in kissing her, in feeling more of her, of satisfying the hunger that had them locked together with such intensity.

She was warm and alive against him and he couldn’t get enough of it as it helped soothe the part of him that had been so restless the past week or so out of fear for her safety.

Their intensity did have them clash a bit more with their kiss than normal–sometimes he only managed to trap one of her lips between his with how she tilted her head in response to him or because she ducked low trying to go in for more when he arched higher.  There were a few times where his teeth grazed along her lips, and he felt her shudder against him, which only encouraged him to do it again.  Especially when those shudders were followed by a tightened grip from her and more fire in the way she kissed him, how she leaned more heavily into him.

She was the first one to break away from the kiss, gasping in air so sharply that it made Levi realize he was starting to get a little light headed from the lack of air, himself.  He wasn’t done, though–not nearly.  So as she gasped for air, Levi took a quick breath and leaned back in, planting a kiss at the corner of her mouth as she took in air.  She didn’t squirm away, and with the thought of how tantalizing her kisses the evening before had been as they had blazed a trail away from his lips, he decided he’d try it for himself, see about blazing a trail of his own.

His lips moved a little further to the side, pressing against her flushed cheek and feeling a warmth seeping through his chest at the more tender seeming gesture amidst the more hungry kisses they’d been giving to one another.  He went a little further back towards her ear, feeling a spark of pride as it seemed to make her gasp again and twitch from a sensitivity to the spot he managed to find as he started to work his way down to her jaw.

It felt like goosebumps broke out across his neck and down to his arms when he felt her return in kind, her lips easily finding their way to his jaw in return with how he was currently angled to kiss under hers.  His hand, resting at her side just above her waist, clenched in the fabric of her uniform as she moved lower to where his jaw met his throat, managing to coax a soft grunt out of him in the process, arm flexing around her and coaxing her to lean more into him.  One of her hands had abandoned the base of his skull where it had been brushing along his undercut and teasing strands of hair between her fingers, now moving lower towards his shoulder, smoothing over the back plate of his gear he had far too tight for her to slip her fingers under.

She wasn’t daunted by it, however.  She coaxed a small gasp from him she might not have even heard as her hand simply traveled lower to trail along his spine where there wasn’t gear in the way, her other hand burying deeper into his hair to tilt his head in a familiar way that had his heart hammering in his chest, lips brushing against her throat for a brief moment at the new angle as he held his breath to see what would come next.

Her lips brushed along the bite mark from the evening before that had barely started to heal, causing his heart to skip a beat as he wondered if she was about to bite him again in the heat of the moment.  She didn’t, though.  Her lips were tender as they pressed against where one fang had pierced him, and then gently over the other, before she started outlining the mark on his neck with a series of soft kisses that had his breath catching with the tingling warmth it sent flashing through him.

Once he knew he wasn’t about to get bit again, he resumed what he’d been doing seconds ago, working his way slowly down her throat and feeling a rumble of a moan building in her chest, feeling a flash of pride and even a little excitement to be drawing that reaction out of her with his attention to her throat for once.

A knock at the door pulled him sharply out of the heat of the moment and back into their time-limited present, growling against her skin loud enough to drown out the little noise of dismay that escaped her lips at the sound as Levi felt his ire rapidly rear its head.

Now was not the time to be intruding upon him, and whoever it was better have a damn good reason for interrupting him.

“What?” he snapped loud enough for whoever was on the other side of the door to hear him, voice still on the gruff side with how little he’d spoken so far this morning and how soon after he’d woken up it was.

“Commander Erwin has requested to see you, Captain,” Eld’s voice answered from the hall, unable to hear the sigh of irritation Levi couldn’t stop from escaping as his grip tightened around Y/N.

Of fucking course it was going to be Erwin calling on him, the one person he couldn’t ignore, especially since the man was awaiting a report about the events of last night–and he needed to talk to anyway to see about moving forwards with Y/N’s goals.  If it had been anyone else he would have told them to fuck off and wait until later.

He would much rather be here in this moment just a few moments longer–

“I can tell what you’d rather do, instead,” she teased him, voice low and breath soft and tantalizing against his throat, not at all helping him resist the urge to stay here with her a little longer as his heart seemed to beat a bit faster at the thought of staying in here and seeing if he could get more than a few gasps and shivers out of her.

“Shut up,” he hissed in warning, arm tensing slightly around her to hold her tighter, not wanting Eld to hear she was on the other side of his locked door so early in the morning.  He could see a teasing smirk playing across her face out of the corner of his eyes, coaxing something in him to rise at the challenge he saw in it.  As she parted her lips to say something else, likely something sassy, Levi, without really thinking about what he was doing besides giving her a quieter, nonverbal warning to hush, nipped at her jaw with his teeth in warning before she could speak again.

She gasped, the sound sharp and shocked, a flush starting to spread across her cheeks at her reaction.

Levi stilled, taken aback by himself.

“Did…did you just bite me?” she asked in shock, and she barely managed to keep her voice at a lower volume, though she was pushing it, and the twitch of her lips towards a grin, the amusement lighting her eyes and the timbre of her voice giving away she was seconds away from laughing, and likely not quietly, either.  That blush on her cheeks remained astride the amusement, however.

“You just bit a vampire–what the hell possessed yo–”

Her voice was starting to rise in volume, and Levi shushed her, the sound sharp but quiet, and quickly muffled as he decided to double down, leaning in quickly to bite again, except a little bit harder and on her neck this time.  His lips and teeth locked around a sensitive patch of skin he was fairly certain was close to where she normally bit him, and a shiver raced down her body that he felt, a strangled whimper escaping her and prompting him to quickly reach out and cover her mouth to muffle the sound lest it reached Eld in the hall.

She held still after that, her breath warm and slightly quicker than normal against his hand as Levi’s arm shifted around her to hold her restricted against him and kept her from moving, his chin brushing against her collar bone as he lifted his head to lock his gaze on the door across the room.

“I’ll be there in a minute,” he called with a clipped tone.

As much as he wanted to stay here and explore that little discovery and the reaction it had invoked from her more…

Interruptions like this was exactly why he’d been hoping to do this last night when they wouldn’t have been interrupted.  Once the day started he was just too busy for anything, or at least had too much to do with other people.

They held that position for several seconds after Eld’s footsteps could be heard retreating from Levi’s door, his hand still over her mouth, both of them still breathing a bit heavier than normal as they slowly came down from the needy high they’d both just been riding.  As Y/N started to relax, her hands came back up to slowly and gently run through Levi’s hair once more, and figuring they weren’t going to be overheard, or at the very least that they had both calmed down enough they weren’t going to be that loud, Levi carefully lowered the hand that had been covering her mouth.  The only sound between them for the first few moments was the long, slow sigh Levi let escape, eyes closed and allowing him a few precious seconds to relish the feel of her hands through his hair a few moments longer.

“Duty calls,” she eventually said, the first to break the silence as her fingers continued to thread through his hair, though her statement had him opening his eyes again to gaze up at her.  “Can't keep the Commander waiting.”

If it had been anyone other than Erwin…

“Y/N…” he started to say softly, the start of a frown tugging at the corner of his lips.  However, she leaned in to kiss one corner of his mouth, then the other, and then tilted his head just slightly so she could place one more lingering, soft kiss to his forehead.

“Later.  We'll talk later when we have the time.  Right now you're expected,” She told him quietly.  The fact she hadn't moved off him yet despite her statements was the clear evidence he wasn't the only one that didn't want to break the moment.  However, when she did pull back after a last few seconds to relish their moment, her fingers trailed along his jaw, prompting his head to tilt and turn to follow their trajectory before that touch fell away as well, leaving him wanting for more.

“I'll see you later,” she promised as she stepped back and started for the door.  Despite his reluctance to let the moment end, she didn't even make it all the way across the room before Levi dutifully got up to retrieve his jacket and cravat to get back to fully redressed before he headed for the meeting with Erwin.

“You two are all over the place with this issue.  And it's not reassuring that you can't seem to make up your minds on your stances for it.”

Erwin was still seated behind his desk, a place that he seemed to be stuck at more and more often with unusually high piles of reports and papers and plans even by his standards.  The paperwork was momentarily being ignored, kept to its stacks and piles around but not currently in front of Erwin.  He was frowning as he looked over at Levi, thumb idly playing with his index finger in small movements as he considered everything that he'd been told about the situation.

Levi shook his head, still leaning against the wall off to Erwin's right where he'd stayed the whole time he'd been telling the man about last night's developments.  “We've argued over how to handle it, especially since the details coming out about the kid just seems to keep making a bigger mess of it all.  But this recent complication put her on her back foot enough to give her pause and make her rethink it all a bit more.  She's still stubborn as ever about helping him, but she's adapting, and willing to accept help.  She even listened when I told her if he doesn't get around this, she'll have to cut ties.”

“And if it goes that way, do you think she actually will, or is that wishful thinking talking?”

Levi considered.  He hoped if it went that way she would listen, that she’d recognize her inability to help and back off without much fuss.  However, there was almost certainly going to be fuss.  She was probably going to try to help him until she absolutely couldn’t any more.

“It might take her a bit longer than I’d like, but I think she will if she realizes it’s hit a point where she can’t help him, as much as she wants to.”

“And your plan to go force his hand into making a decision.  Going in the day so you’re safe outside his cave is a pretty strong natural protection, and I know you’ll be armed just in case something causes the situation to turn ugly, and she’ll be there to restrain him, so I’m not so concerned about the danger of such a meeting that L/N did take issue with originally.  What I am worried about are the people hunting him, and the growing risk of her, and now you, getting caught in the crossfire if he’s found.  These walls can suddenly turn stifling and far too small when one’s on the run from someone, especially from the military,” Erwin said seriously, holding Levi’s gaze.

Levi could feel the tension that gathered in his shoulders at the way Erwin phrased that, able to sense the danger and even /further/ complication headed their way.  “...You were trying to get some Scouts to volunteer to help in the search to have an in with what was happening.  How did that go?”

Erwin hummed, but his steady gaze did not move from Levi.  “Not well.  You’re aware the Garrison are taking it personally, and there’s a squad or two from the Military Police assisting in making the search more efficient.  My offer for volunteers, as easy as it is to excuse it as soldiers needing something to do to help manage the situation, was diverted to other resources–namely maintaining the peace where the Garrison and Military Police are now lacking during the search for the young vampire.  They’re not letting anyone else in, but from what I’ve gleaned, they’re being very thorough with their search.”

It would have been strange for the Military Police to have gotten involved if it wasn’t for how high profile this mess had become.  A criminal that dangerous that had killed two civilians and five Garrison troops?  Of course the Military Police were going to get involved.

As for Emery…they were going to have to come up with a better solution for what to do about this situation besides making him disappear, especially if part of the point, on a practical level to convince Erwin to allow the attempt to help the kid, had been the potential of another vampire in the Scouts eventually.  That wasn’t going to work if the kid’s face was everywhere and he’d become this legend of a murderer that disappeared within the walls, with the Garrison taking it personally and likely to remember and even recognize the kid’s face in the future.  Not to mention, since there were only so many places to hide within the walls, it was very possible that eventually someone was going to stumble across his hiding place–and they didn’t need any more dead bodies.  There were already too many as the situation stood right now.

Forty years ago, Y/N had to shake the Garrison off her tail as well, and it had been an effective method, but drastic.  He wouldn’t bring it up here, now, with Erwin–he would talk to Y/N first, see what ideas she had that could help settle this issue before it spiraled any further out of control.

As if it hadn’t already–as if they didn’t already have their plates overflowing with all the shit they were busy shoveling right now between the fall of Maria and the resulting refugee and food shortage crisis bearing down on them, Emery–a situation that just kept multiplying in issues–and Y/N’s vampire drama between hunters and her sire, as Erwin had called the vampire that turned her.

“We’ll be mindful of that going forward.  And I’ll add talking about what to do about that situation to the list of things we need to discuss and try to find a solution to while we’re all there.”

Erwin leaned forward, gaze still unwavering from Levi, even as Levi had been mulling over his thoughts.  The scrutiny was something Levi was still trying to adjust to, well aware that Erwin was watching his actions and decisions more closely than he had in some time.  All to make sure the budding relationship between himself and Y/N wasn’t clouding his judgment in any way.  “Do you think that you'll be able to persuade him into being more...considerate of the situation he's created?”

That he was certain of.  No matter how the situation went, Levi was going to draw the line in the sand and make sure the kid ended up on one side or the other, whether that meant they cut ties or they finally made some damn progress.

“If the kid can't make up his mind with the ultimatum he's going to get, then there's no helping him.  Either he listens and accepts the help she's trying to give him, or there won't be any more arrangement,” Levi said flatly.

He was willing to let Y/N try this–as insane as it made him with the rising risks attached to it–and back her decision.  He understood why she was doing it.  But he wasn’t going to allow this kid to create a situation that threatened to destroy everything she’d managed to scrape together for herself recently, that she’d worked so hard to build.

He wasn’t going to allow a situation that would punish her for Emery’s decisions.

Erwin seemed to be satisfied with Levi’s answer, or at least the look in Levi’s eyes while he considered just how resolute he was about making sure Emery didn’t cause Y/N harm directly or indirectly, because he nodded, leaning back in his seat and finally looking away.  “Good.  Then I expect a resolution and progress when you two return from your trip in a few days to help with the refugees staying in the western part of Rose as part of our efforts to help ease the strain of managing this refugee crisis.”

Erwin frowned at the mention of the refugee crisis, and even though it had sounded like the end of the conversation, Levi could tell there was more coming, so he waited to hear what else Erwin had to say.

“Speaking of…just as a warning, Levi:  The Council has started talking about their culling plan again.  Much more actively this time.”

Levi felt his heart stop for a moment.  If they were talking about it actively now, then…it was coming.  Sooner rather than later, no doubt, given the look on Erwin’s face as he poured over more detailed maps of what Levi now saw were parts of the territory of Maria closest to Rose’s wall.

It was close enough Erwin was starting to make plans for how they were going to handle it when the dirty work inevitably got shunted onto them.

Levi didn’t have any words for that.  Didn’t even want to think about it beyond what was necessary, not until it was time for him to have to think about it.  But the warning that it was coming was still appreciated, since it gave him time to start mentally preparing himself.

He didn’t address it, however.  He simply reverted back to the conversation they’d been having before the warning.

“I’ll update her when she’s back from visiting Emery.  We’ll have finished before the end of the week.”

It seemed they wouldn’t be able to afford to be gone any longer than that.

Next Chapter--->

Everything Tags:   @antistellxr 

Levi Tags:  @clary-quinn @ayatosmlktea @whalerus @sunny-flo @thirstyforsometea @hauntedhousecat @peaches-and-clouds @imaginationmess @wubbawubwub04 @lollobos @pasteldays @itsmeaudriee @macaronnv @tokyo-banana @apuci-kis-szornye @momowantscats @yellowminb @ashikothedog @notgoodforlife @spnwinchestersd @xxdarkdarlingxx @joy-the-reader

Wings in the Dark Tags: @regalillegal @animeluver23 @theshylittleelfgirl @queenthorin1 @dilucs-thighs @lady-ragnvindr @subtlepjiminie @queenondeezmatatas​​ @linxiajei17 @levisbebe @toni-jones @pinkberrymilktea @ascybous @emmaandemmel @wolfie3616 @aot-fanatic @jencyib @zombiukas @notgoodforlife​ @syviis @captainyanag1

[warabidakihime]

★ characters: levi ackerman x reader | modern au

★ plot summary: levi helps you get through an episode

★ content warnings : implied su!cidal ideations, talks about mental illness (panic attacks, anxiety, and depression).

★ a/n: just a lil something i wrote out of sheer indulgence cause i am going through it ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა . so i guess you could say this is true to life and the only difference is, i don't have a levi by myself doing all these for me LOL. BUT YEAH, i hope you like this one and i hope it could help other people who might be going through the same thing.

sending everybody hugs!

-

Title: Until When Do I Need to Run?

"What if I'm too tired by the time I reach the 'pinnacle' of my life?"

Your voice sounded soft and vulnerable as you let those words slip through your lips.

Normally, you wouldn't let these kinds of thoughts escape the confines of your mind, but today, your heart was desperately screaming for any semblance of salvation.

Anything that could shed light on your ever-gloomy world.

From the dining table where your boyfriend sat, enjoying his freshly brewed jasmine tea after dinner, Levi raised an eyebrow in your direction. "What?"

You were at the sink, washing the dishes, as it was your turn this week. You chuckled humorlessly as you rinsed a plate rather mindlessly. "It's nothing. I was just thinking out loud."

"And thinking ridiculous things too," Levi said, his voice louder than usual. It didn't occur to you that he had moved until you were spun around, facing him. He was already behind you while you were racking your brains for a response.

"What's wrong with you? Did something happen?" His frown was deep, his gray eyes piercing. Despite being shorter, his presence loomed over you.

Reaching for the kitchen towel to dry your hands, you stayed mute for a few minutes in an attempt to gather your thoughts.

"Work has just been... rough lately, and the stress is getting to me. But today was especially hard," you started. You were speaking slowly, trying to articulate your words as best as you could.

It was something your therapist had taught you years ago. Because of the things you went through growing up and the trauma you'd accumulated, you'd unfortunately lost your ability to speak coherently at times, almost to the point of being considered a person with a disability.

Having such a handicap was frustrating and humiliating, to say the least. It angered you when you couldn't get the right words out or when your mind went blank mid-sentence, rendering you temporarily mute.

Thankfully, you had Levi. He'd been your boyfriend for eight years, and since you got together, life wasn't as draining as it once was. You couldn't be more grateful to him. The two of you had met while you were on a coffee run at work. He was behind you in line, and when your card was unfortunately declined and you didn't have cash on you, you almost had an anxiety attack.

In his own way of displaying kindness, Levi scoffed from behind you and handed the cashier his card to pay for both your orders.

"If you don't want to go through something like that again, make sure you have cash on you, dumbass."

And the rest was history.

You went quiet again, and while Levi waited patiently, he took your hand, gave it a loving squeeze, and led you to the living room so that you could sit and talk comfortably.

Once you were settled, you took a deep breath, which sounded shaky as it escaped your lips. Your emotions were clearly piling up inside, and it was just a matter of when they would burst.

"Steady your breathing first, Y/N," Levi said as he rubbed your back gently, doing his best to comfort you while you grounded yourself. "Take your time."

Smiling sheepishly at him, you did as told, and then finally, you continued to confide in him.

"Nothing major happened, but work has been really hectic recently due to the amount of things we need to do, and it doesn't help that my team is severely understaffed. So, I guess the fatigue and stress have been piling up, and it's getting to me."

Levi noticed the tension in your shoulders and the way your hands were trembling slightly. He reached out and gently massaged your temples, his touch soothing.

"Any word on that incompetent manager of yours? They're looking for a replacement, right?" Levi asked, his voice tinged with annoyance. He knew the lore of what was happening at your workplace, and to say that he was pissed was an understatement.

Not only were you neglected by your immediate supervisor, but you also had to catch up and do his workload while still getting paid less than him. The whole thing was a mess, and to be completely honest, Levi was on edge, worried for your well-being. It sucked that his worst fears were manifesting.

"They're doing the best they can, so I'm just waiting patiently on that."

Levi let out a 'tsk' and rolled his eyes, clearly more annoyed for you. The gesture caused you to giggle a little.

"And to sum it all up, the whole thing kind of shoved me into another episode, and I started to overthink things again." You said with a pout, then continued, "I started to think of negative things again, like the fact I literally have to work like a horse just so I can survive for another two weeks. From that, I started to get dizzy because it dawned on me that it would literally take me years to succeed. And then I thought, what if by the time I reach the most successful point of my life, I'm too tired to celebrate or to even continue living because that's what I've been striving to achieve for so long, and that's where I've been pouring all my energy—"

"Okay, stop. Stop right there," Levi interrupted, his voice firm. He let out a frustrated sigh and pulled you closer, taking your hands in his. "You're spiraling, Y/N. You're making a mountain out of a molehill. We're going to tackle this together, one step at a time. Right now, you need to breathe and relax."

His gray eyes held a stern yet caring expression. "Focus on the now, Y/N. We deal with problems as they come. I'm here. I'll be your anchor, but you have to let go of the rope a little."

You looked into his eyes, feeling the weight of his words. Levi had always been your rock—the one who grounded you when your mind spiraled. You knew he was right, and his presence always brought you back to reality.

As you sat there, hand in hand, you felt a sense of calm wash over you.

"Thank you, Levi," you whispered, leaning in to rest your head on his shoulder.

Levi noticed the shift in your demeanor. He squeezed your hand reassuringly, his other hand coming up to stroke your hair gently.

"You know, Y/N," he started softly, his voice a stark contrast to his earlier firmness. "You're incredibly strong. You've faced challenges I couldn't imagine, and you’ve come out stronger for it. But even the strongest people need to recharge."

He paused, giving you a moment to absorb his words. "It's okay to not be okay sometimes. It's okay to feel overwhelmed. What matters is how you deal with it. And right now, you're dealing with it by talking to me instead of keeping all that to yourself, and you've also been really consistent with it, which is a huge step. Good job."

Levi squeezed your hand gently again. "We'll figure this out together. Maybe we can start by setting some boundaries at work. Or maybe we can find some ways to de-stress outside of work. We can try new hobbies, or just spend more quality time together."

You felt a lump form in your throat as you listened to Levi's words. Just him being there for you brought so much warmth; it's as if he's hugging you from within.

At that moment, you realized how lucky you were to have him in your life.

You looked up at him, your eyes filled with a mixture of gratitude and vulnerability. His words, spoken with such gentle sincerity, had a profound effect on you. It felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. You realized how much you had been bottling up and how much you had been neglecting your own well-being.

"Thank you," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "Thank you for always being here for me. I don't know what I would do without you."

Levi smiled softly, reaching up to brush away a stray tear that had escaped your eye. "You don't have to figure it out alone, Y/N. And never, ever hesitate to reach out to me. I am the last person that would push you away."

A comfortable silence settled between you as you both took a moment to appreciate the connection. The soft glow of the living room lamp casts a warm ambiance, creating an intimate atmosphere.

"I know I've been a bit of a downer lately," you admitted, your voice trembling slightly. "I hate that I let this get to me. I hate that I'm becoming this person who's always stressed and overwhelmed."

Levi squeezed your hand tighter.

"You're not this person, Y/N. You're going through a tough time, and that's okay."

You nodded, feeling a sense of relief wash over you. It was comforting to know that you had someone who understood and supported you unconditionally.

The conversation continued, flowing naturally as you shared your fears and worries with Levi. He listened patiently, offering words of encouragement and practical advice. You felt a sense of peace as you opened up to him, something you hadn't done in a long time.

Hours seemed to fly by as you talked. The initial darkness outside had given way to the soft hues of dawn. Levi's grip on your hand never loosened, his presence a constant source of comfort.

Eventually, the weight of exhaustion began to creep in. You yawned, your eyes heavy with sleep. Levi noticed and smiled gently.

"It's late, Y/N," he said softly. "Let's head to bed."

You nodded, your head leaning against his shoulder. "Mkay. Thank you, Levi."

Levi kissed the top of your head. "You're welcome. We'll talk more about this tomorrow if you want, alright?" 

You nodded, a sheepish smile on your face. "Okay."

He stood up and stretched, a yawn escaping his lips. "I'll get us some water."

You watched as Levi moved toward the kitchen, feeling exponentially better, all thanks to him. When he returned with two glasses of water, he handed you one and sat back down beside you.

"Drink up," he said, his voice soft but firm.

You took a sip, feeling the cool liquid soothe your throat. After finishing the water, you placed the glass on the coffee table and turned to Levi.

"Thank you, Levi, for everything," you said, your voice full of sincerity.

He gave you a small smile, his eyes reflecting his affection for you. "Always, Y/N."

Setting his glass aside, Levi suddenly cupped your face with his hands, his touch gentle yet commanding. He leaned in, his lips capturing yours in a kiss that was more passionate and eager than usual. His kiss conveyed all the love, support, and reassurance he wanted to give you, grounding you in the moment.

You responded in kind, your arms wrapping around his neck as you melted into the kiss. The intensity of the moment made your worries fade away, replaced by the warmth and love radiating from Levi. He pulled you closer, deepening the kiss, his hands moving to your waist, holding you securely.

When you finally pulled away for air, you rested your forehead against his, your breaths mingling. Levi's eyes were soft but intense, filled with a promise of unwavering support.

"You're not alone, Y/N," he whispered, his voice husky with emotion. "I love you, and I'll always be here for you."

Tears of gratitude filled your eyes as you looked at him. "I love you too, Levi."

With that, he took your hand and led you to the bedroom. You both settled into bed, the weight of the day's worries feeling lighter. As you lay there, wrapped in each other's arms, you felt a sense of peace and security that only Levi could provide.

"Goodnight, Y/N," Levi murmured, his breath warm against your ear.

"Goodnight, Levi," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

The room fell into a serene silence, only your steady breathing filling the space. Levi’s arms around you felt like a shield against the world’s troubles, and the steady beat of his heart was a comforting rhythm that lulled you into relaxation.

As sleep began to pull you under, you felt a tender kiss pressed to your forehead while Levi’s fingers lightly traced soothing patterns on your back—his way of reminding you that he was always there, ready to lift the burdens you carried.

[xmads-omensx]

Levi Ackerman x Single Mother Reader

In which Levi is a teacher at a kindergarten and ends up meeting the mother of his best student at a parent-teacher meeting.

Levi and the reader have a great connection, which ends up leading to a meeting at a coffee shop and soon after to a romantic relationship.

I'm looking to read something cute, romantic. Please. Where Levi ends up becoming a father to the child, and also having his own child with the reader.

I'll leave the development to you.

Thanks and there's no need to rush. ❤️🌹

Word Count: 2,069

Pairing: Levi Ackerman X single Mother! Reader

CW: modern au, mentions of pregnancy

Tags: @follow-me-down-to-wonderland

“Noah!” Levi scolded as he followed his students out of the classroom to meet their parents after the school day ended. “No running.”

The young boy, Noah, huffed and stomped his foot against the gravelled playground before walking towards his mother.

“Bye Mr. Ackerman!” A young voice called out. He turned to see Oliver, a young boy in his class, waving at him as he walked away with his mother who smiled at him softly as they walked away. Levi waved back with a hint of a smile on his face.

Levi knew that he wasn’t supposed to have favourites as a teacher, but Oliver was by far his favourite.

He was top of the class in every assignment, and reminded him of one of his former students, Armin, but he had the same spunk that his former student, Eren had. The two of them were by far his favourite students that he had ever had the displeasure of teaching.

Levi trudged back to his classroom to prepare for the parent-teacher conference the next evening.

Due to Oliver’s outstanding grades, filling out the necessary paperwork had been easy.

The only issue that Levi would have to bring up to Oliver’s parents was the fact that he didn’t seem to have very many friends.

Out of all the other students, Oliver was very much a lone wolf.

Sure, he spoke to the other students and had relatively decent relationships with them, but he was still very much alone.

Noah, one of Levi’s other students, seemed to really like Oliver. Enough to get him some chocolate and a football for his birthday even though the pair rarely spoke.

Oliver, however, was not much of a fan of Noah. He found him loud and disruptive.

Levi thought that the two would make a great pair. Oliver was quiet, whilst Noah was outgoing.

They balanced eachother perfectly.

Oliver’s file was filled with notes that Levi had made whilst observing the two both in class and at recess.

He was always a pleasure to teach and he couldn’t wait to relay that to his parents, making sure that they knew how intelligent their son truly was.

The next evening rolled around quicker than he had anticipated.

The school day typically felt like it was dragging on as he taught class after class of unruly children who wanted to do anything but what Levi wanted them to do, however today, they seemed to be on their best behaviour.

Levi presumed it was because they knew about the parent-teacher conference that evening and were trying to ensure that he wouldn’t have anything negative to report back to their parents.

The evening itself, however, always dragged on.

He usually made plans with his colleagues, Hange Zoe who taught biology to some of the older grades, and Erwin Smith who was the principle.

Traditionally, they would all go to the local bar for a couple of drinks before heading home for the weekend and that was the only thing that Levi enjoyed about these evenings.

However, as the meetings wore on, Levi began to think that this tradition was getting less and less likely to happen this semester.

He shared a brief look of despair with Hange, who offered him a defeated shrug in response, from across the gym as the next parent sat down in front of him.

Levi had barely glanced down at the paperwork in front of him so that he could identify who his next appointment belonged to, when a woman sat opposite him.

She was quite possibly the most beautiful woman that Levi had ever laid eyes on.

“Hi Mr. Ackerman!” A high-pitched, cheery voice excitedly babbled from beside her.

So this must be Oliver’s mother? Levi thought to himself as he smiled at the boy who beamed up at him.

“Hello Mrs. Y/L/N, it’s a pleasure to meet you. Are we waiting for your husband to join us, or are we just getting started right away?” Levi asked, with a slight ulterior motive.

“I don’t have a dad Mr. Ackerman.” Oliver said with a giggle as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

A strange sense of relief washed over Levi at hearing that his father wasn’t in the picture.

He felt guilty for feeling like that, of course. He never wanted a kid to grow up without a father figure like he had done.

Levi had grown up with only his mother for a small portion of his life, and he had turned out alright, right?

Hange would disagree.

She thought Levi was some freak of nature.

“Oliver, why don’t we let Mr. Ackerman talk us through your grades?” Oliver’s mother prompted.

Levi cleared his throat before skimming over the paperwork In front of him.

“Well, Mrs. Y/L/N, Oliver has been a model student all semester. He has consistently been getting high marks on all of his homework and class assignments, which is very good. His behaviour is perfect and, as you know, his attendance is one hundred percent. There’s nothing to worry about.” Levi stated matter-of-factly.

“That’s great, isn’t it bud.” She replied with a smile, looking down at her son and ruffling his hair. “But please, call me Y/N, I’m not a mrs anymore, so my first name is fine.”

“Oh, my apologies, force of habit.” Levi responded.

“It’s okay. Happens all the time.” She laughed, waving her hand dismissively.

Her laugh awoke something in Levi. His stomach fluttered as he looked back down at the paperwork in front of him, trying to hide his blush.

“Do you have any questions?” He asked.

“Yes actually.” She began. “Oliver never  seems to want to invite anybody over after school, or on a weekend, or anything like that. He doesn’t get invited places either, is he having any difficulty making friends?”

The question had surprised Levi.

“He gets on well with his classmates if that’s what you’re asking.” Levi replies.

“Sorry, what I’m trying to understand is if my son has friends or not.” She continued.

Her concern warmed Levi’s heart ever-so-slightly.

“There is one boy in his class that seems to really want to be friends with Oliver, but he doesn’t seem too interested.” Levi explained.

“He’s loud.” Oliver said simply.

“Who is, honey?” His mother asked with a smile.

Levi thought her smile was beautiful.

“Noah.” Oliver went on. “He’s super loud.”

His observation made Levi chuckle.

“Yes, Noah is loud, but he’s a nice young boy.” Levi said.

With that, their conference came to an end. Oliver waved goodbye to Levi as he exited the building.

By the time all of the parents had been seen to, it was far too late for Levi and his colleagues to follow up with their tradition, so instead they walked out to the car park and made arrangements to go out for dinner the week later.

A familiar voice shook Levi out of his thoughts as he spun round to see Oliver’s mother standing behind him.

“Sorry, I know this is super weird, but I was wondering if I could get your phone number so we could go out for dinner sometime?” She asked.

Levi was taken aback. This had never happened to him before.

“My phone number?” He asked incredulously.

“Yes, your phone number.” She laughed before her expression changed from a look of hopefulness to a look of shame and embarrassment. “Oh god. I’ve completely misread this, haven’t I?” She exclaimed, her hands shooting up to cover her face.

“Sorry, I’m not quite sure that I’m following.” Levi responded.

“I don’t know. I was just picking some kind of ‘vibe’ in there I guess. I was wondering if you might like to go out, like on a date, sometime?” She went on with a nervous smile.

“Me?” Levi asked.

“Yes.” She giggled, Levi’s stomach erupted with butterflies again.

“You want to go on a date with me?” He asked again, still in total bewilderment  about the entire scenario.

“Yes, I do. Unless there’s a rule that a teacher can’t date a student’s parent?” She replied, hurriedly adding the end of her sentence on.

“No, there’s no rule when it comes to students in their final year.” Levi answered. “What would you propose for our date then?” He asked.

“Dinner?” She replied with a sheepish smile. “There’s this new Italian place not too far from here if you fancy it?”

“When?” Levi asked in his typical blunt manner.

“Tonight?” She replied, equally as bluntly but with a sly grin, as if she were mocking him ever so slightly.

“Lead the way.” Levi replied simply, locking his car door before extending his elbow out for her to take.

That night was the first of many like it.

Late night dates, shy smiles across the playground at pickup, phone calls as soon as Oliver was put to bed.

It felt like he was back in high school but instead of hiding from his mother, he was hiding from a five-year-old boy.

It all came to a head one afternoon at pickup when Y/N came to pick up Oliver.

Levi and her shared their usual knowing smile as Oliver waved goodbye to Noah, who had become his best friend over the last few months.

Their silent stare was broken when the young boy spoke up.

“Mommy, please, we all know you want to kiss Mr. Ackerman, just do it.” Oliver had said with an exasperated tone, loud enough for everybody in the playground to hear.

Silence fell, before parents began to laugh softly at the child.

Even Y/N had begun to giggle, completely unable to resist her son’s oblivious nature.

After that, they no longer needed to hide their relationship from the rest of the world.

Oliver seemed perfectly happy about the fact that his mother was now dating his favourite teacher. Especially since it meant that he got to hang out with Levi more.

Concerns had been raised by other members of staff that Levi might favour Oliver, but he ensured them that this was not the case at all.

Oliver’s high grades was simply due to his own work and had nothing to do with Levi besides his teaching.

When Oliver left school, his fear of never seeing his beloved Mr. Ackerman was erased since Levi ended up moving in with Y/N and Oliver.

It was perfect in every way.

Every morning, Levi got to wake up to the most beautiful woman that he had ever seen, and got to become a father to the most incredible child that he had ever had the privilege of teaching.

Oliver was so inquisitive in fact that it was him who realised that his mother might be pregnant.

Levi had expressed his desire to be a father, but Oliver had filled that cavity in his heart from the moment he begged Levi to read him a bedtime story.

It wasn’t like him and Y/N were trying for a baby by any means, it just kind of… happened.

Oliver began to notice that his mother wasn’t her usual self. She was more tired than usual, unwell in the mornings, she just seemed different now.

In traditional five-year-old fashion, Oliver sprung this announcement onto his mother and Levi completely unprompted and out of the blue.

“Mommy.” He had begun innocently. “Noah said you might be pregnant because your boobies are bigger than they were last time he saw you.”

Y/N spat out the water she was drinking, whilst Levi spat out his tea in unison with her.

Silence filled the space.

Of course, Levi and Y/N knew that she was pregnant, but they hadn’t yet told Oliver about it.

“Well, Noah is right buddy.” Levi replied, whilst Y/N was still sat in a stunned silence, still unable to find the words to respond to her son’s statement.

“I’m gonna be a brother?” Oliver asked, his eyes sparkling with hope.

“Yeah you are.” Levi smiled, still shocked that he was finally going to become a father.

Oliver cheered with joy, running around the living room jumping up and down with excitement.

“I can’t wait!” He yelled, jumping to hug his mother and Levi.

Y/N smiled at Levi, clearly moved by Oliver’s excitement over the prospect of becoming a brother.

“Me neither baby.” Y/N replied, kissing the top of Oliver’s head.

I love you, Levi mouthed at Y/N.

I love you more, she mouthed back.

[moonbeamoclock]

I totally respect a writers decision to write about whatever the fuck they want but I’m still a firm believer that the people who are writing about those topics do need to seek help if only to develop a proper distinction between simply writing about it and glorifying it. There are a lot of writers who tag their stuff properly and are very clear about the subject matter being strictly fiction but there are also a lot of other writers who don’t care about what the person scrolling their ‘for you’ feed on tumblr is seeing.

Writing about that kind of stuff is obviously a manifestation of some deep phycological issues AND THAT IS TOTALLY OKAY!!!! Continue to write about the subject matter while acknowledging as a writer WHY you’re writing about it!!!! This website is for YOU to enjoy and if that’s writing a story with some sensitive subject matter then that is totally valid to do so!!!

Sorry for the rant an probs gonna get hate cuz ik this fandom but i had to say this

You are responsible for the content you consume. Don’t like, Don’t read.

i’ve seen a few posts about this but

if you cannot spell or speak about rape, pedophilia or any dark topic then maybe don’t talk about it, because purposely miss spelling it proves you are not mature enough to talk about it or handle the topic, this isn’t tik tok you don’t have to sugarcoat anything. Yes i am aware these are sensitive (and horrible) subjects and can be triggering but no one is forcing you to read or talk about it.

Me, and a lot of authors, put the content warnings at the top of the fic because that’s the first thing people will see and it is your responsibility to read those warnings if you wish to read a fic, not ours. This goes with Dead Dove: Do Not Eat (DDDNE), a warning or tag used to indicate that a fanwork contains tropes or elements that may be deemed morally reprehensible without explicitly condemning the sensitive aspect. It says what it says on the tin and you still read it, that is on you, not us.

Saying an author is glorying or promoting and they need mental or professional help for writing/reblogging rape or abuse or sexual assault because of their or another authors writings is a stretch, people can and are into some messed up things that to some people can be triggering or disturbing and you can be 100% into something fictionally without wanting to explore it physically.

No one if forcing you to read something you do not like

Same with minors in fandoms, this is a common things and there is nothing you can do about it, yes they shouldn’t be viewing or reading certain things in the fandoms but they’ll still find a way.

Say rape, say kill, no one’s gonna to hate you, if you can’t handle dark topics in a fic, block the author it’s not hard, no one will hate you for doing that and harassing and swinging death threats to a creator because they made something you don’t like is a shitty thing to do, if you don’t want to read a certain trope or topic that’s fine, people have preferences, but trying to start a witch hunt and purity culture campaign over it is not ok. I think sometimes they don’t because they want to start hate.

Fandoms are safe spaces for people who like a certain content, yes there are bad people in fandom and areas in a fandom that are filled with disgusting people, but it is a online safe space for people to enjoy the content they like. Fandoms are not for you to try and purify because you can’t be mature enough to block an author for posting content you don’t like.

[ins4-tiable]

A Knight's Hymm

Knight! Levi Ackerman x Princess! reader

Levi being the first commoner captain, is quite sceptical of royalty. especially, you.

A/n: This a draft I couldn't bring myself to finish but I put my whole budussy into it so imma js post it.

You always smiled in a way that dulled the gold and jewels around you, A smile that covered your face and painted a pretty picture.

He couldn't stand it, No matter how much his head warned him of its falsehood, his heart couldn't help but flutter.

"Greedy wealthy pigs." 

He would mutter under his breath, even as they drafted him into the Royal Army, As captain no less. As he stood at attention at the mention of the king, his brows still furrowed in disgust.

They really should have known better than to put a man from the slums in such a high position.

Everyone else did. 

Everyone, but you. 

"Captian Levi! There you are!” You smiled. 

He couldn't help but loop himself, every time you flashed him that damned grin he couldn't stop himself from comparing you to gold.

"Your majesty." He acknowledged. 

You rolled your eyes.

"Must you be such a buzz kill?" You shook your head. 

Before he could answer, soft pampered hands had grabbed his; 

Thick and rough, littered with irreversible tales of the past, mostly the thick stubs where his middle and index fingers once were. 

He doubts it was an accident when you grabbed that hand

You covered his hand in yours, A cold and small item resting in his hands.

Your fingers dragged as they left. Neither of you mentioned it. 

Levi skeptically eyed his hand. A small, but heavy broach resting in the palm of his hand. 

“A formal invitation.” Your smile reached your eyes. “As my escort of course!" 

Levi furrowed his brows, his eyes snapping up to look at you

“…" He paused, giving you an unimpressed look "Invitation? Do I have much of a choice?” He snarked, eyeing you suspiciously. 

Your eyes seemed to crinkle.

" I always give you a choice. " You pause, glancing at the broch, Seemingly chuckling to yourself. " Think it over will you?"

You bowed your head slightly before you took your leave. 

It always made his skin crawl when you did that. He would rather you treat him like all the other nobles did. 

When you treated him like he was worth something his job got far harder.  

You ran your brush through your hair after meticulous work, the fresh feeling of newly washed hair enveloping your scalp. 

Your arms were quite sore, having only recently banned your maids from your chambers. But hard work receives fruitful rewards. 

You were sure it wasn't nearly as good as trained hands, but your heart swelled with pride. 

Your hair and skin were still damp as you slipped on your bathrobe. Nevertheless, you did not have time to fuss over the small details, you were sure Captain Levi would be arriving any-

The sound of a polite but firm knock harshly interrupted your thoughts. 

"I can always count on Captain Levi to mess with my plans." you chuckled to yourself. 

You begrudgingly made your way to your door. You expected him to take longer than he did to think about your proposal. 

Your door pulled open, fresh damp hair clinging to your face 

as your eyes glided to his

" Captain Levi." you hummed. A surprised look plastered on your face. Though, you doubt you fooled Levi.

 " It's quite late for visitors. Don't you think?" 

You could hear Levi's breath stop in his throat, and as quick as you heard it his brows snapped down in a furrow. 

"Your Highness!" He hissed, neck and ears flushing.

"What? It's to be expected that I would be bathing at these hours." You shrugged, shifting your weight to the right, motioning him inside. 

"no, I don't think that would be appropriate-"

"It must have been important for you to come to my chambers at this hour, so please." You insisted.

You could see his jaw visibly clench, Your eyes briefly flickering to the vein that gathered on his neck. 

The sound of his heavy footsteps dragged against the marble floor, Willing himself to move further into your chambers. He had hoped it was his sense of duty willing him to gather more information on you, but he knew that wasn't the case. 

He reluctantly took a seat, eyeing you with a glare. His brows furrowed in an almost permanent M. 

The sound of thick splashing filled the room as you filled both cups. A small smile on your lips, your eyes entirely focused on the cup before you. 

"Your Highness, I-" 

" I know you're a part of the rebellion." You began, cutting his speech off. "That's why you are here to deny my escort request. Right?" 

Your eyes flickered to his as you asked. 

His face was pulled taunt. Not letting a slip of emotion seep through his skin. He was already glaring at you, but this one was different.

It was cold. 

Your eyes locked to his, And in a moment a knife was at your neck. A steel-stained knife threaded at your throat. You didn't even blink, your facade of a smile still permanent on your lips. 

Your eyes glanced down at the knife. 

"The knife at my neck makes me think you want to kill me." You state, looking back up at him that cold look he wore at war glazed over his eyes. 

"Quit with the Bullshit." He spits, rising in his chair. "What do you want." 

"Me?" You ask, tilting your head to the side. "You're the one who put a knife to my neck. " Your brows furrowed and jaw slacked, painting a furiously offended look on your face. 

"You-" 

"I'm kidding." You say, a smirk replacing the frown you placed on your lips. "I'll speak when there is no longer a knife at my throat." 

Silence filled the room, Your eyes locked onto each other in a glare. 

Levi let out a sharp click of his tongue, reluctantly moving back down, slipping his knife back into its hiding spot. 

You take a long sip of your now lukewarm tea, humming disapprovingly before setting it back down with a click.

"That invitation is one for my wedding." 

"what-"

" And once I'm married I'll be no more than a living doll. " You sighed, your eyes stuck to the round edge of your cup. 

" They don't want me to exercise my right as a royal, so they sold me off to a pig." You sneered. " Since they threw me away the only thing left for me to do is to sell information to the rebellion."

A Thick solemn Silence Stuck in the air, constricting around Levi's throat. He couldn't speak. 

His hand gripped tightly to your round marble table. He could feel his heart tighten to a stop.

He glanced up at you, steeling himself.

"And how am I supposed to believe that? This could easily be a trick."

You sighed, standing up from your seat. Levi watched you in silence as you reached under your thick bedding. Pulling a bland or unremarkable box from under your bed.

The sounds of the soft patter of your feet echoed through the empty room, and with a swift flush you emptied the dull box onto the table.

Covering the table were altered royal documents.

"I've been keeping Erwin and the rebellion alive by altering information" You stated, " Without me, they'd be dead."

"You-"

" Even if you don't like me, don't let that stop you from helping the people!" You reason, a sudden passion filling your words. " I had planned on doing this myself.. but."

You stopped your words, your perfectly crafted mask beginning to crumble as your throat constricted at the thought of being sold off.

Levi paused as he watched true emotion seep through your face, You seemed to shine even brighter.

" Goddamn it." He hissed, 

You didn't get the chance to speak, as he quickly grabbed you by the back of the head, leading his lips to yours. 

Rough chapped lips pushed aggressively into you, his entire body leaning across the table to reach you, as a hand keeping your head steady while he kissed you. Kissed you as if he was in battle.

Your head was moving a mile per minute, and yet, not a single thought could process through you. But for some straight reason, you couldn't seem to stop yourself from wanting more.

You pushed back against him, running your tongue past his lips and into his awaiting mouth. You could feel his gasp against you, and tremble as he reciprocated the action. 

For someone who grabbed you so passionately, he sure wasn't prepared. 

Levi pulled away from you, A red face gazing up at you as his forehead pressed against yours. 

" They'll kill you," He said, breath heavy in his words and a worried tremble in his raspy tone. 

You paused at his words, letting out a breathy chuckle. 

" It's worth it." You smiled. 

His jaw clenched

"What? No! What the hell is wrong with you?" He asked, roughly grabbing you by the shoulders.

His brows furrowed far harder than ever, and his eyes filled with a thick passion that made your heart flutter.

"I finally get the chance to have you and you want to just die?" He exclaimed

"What-"

Levi kissed you again, a scared, Emotional kiss.

This has been sitting in my drafts for over a year so I'm releasing it to the world!

[lucysarah1875]

Levi opening the door of his house. Erwin kneeling with open arms to receive Levi’s daughter.

Erwin: come on, give a kiss to uncle Erwin.

Levi: *picks her up* she doesn’t give kisses to men, Never. She’s going to be a nun … Or a lesbian. I don’t trust a single one around her.

[m-jelly]

Hey, I have request where one of the 104th cadets trying to impress the Levi's wife (Reader). Of course Levi just ignored them because he knew it was all just a phase? Just like that one episode where he said it was all just a phase something like that?? Because Eren woke up from a dream, where he dreamed about his father's memories about Kruger (I hope you understand)

It's just a phase...

Levi x fem reader

Canon world, married, fluff, romance, silliness, confident Levi, reader is admin for the scouts.

While on an outing with the scouts to recharge, the lads of the 104th try to impress you, but you are unfazed. Hange teases Levi about it, but he's full of confidence, ignores them and carries on loving you.

Eren shouted your name. "I can carry all that!"

You hummed a laugh as he picked up a few crates. "Thank you."

Connie grabbed a few more. "I can get more!"

You glanced over at Levi, knowing your husband was finding this amusing. You glanced back as you watched the two of them. "Thank you."

Eren hurried over to you. "Is there anything else I can do for you? I can carry more."

Connie huffed. "Yeah, right."

"I'll set up the picnic more! I'll make it look good."

Connie ran to the picnic area. "I'll make it better!"

Hange moved closer. "Hey, Levi? They're really into your wife. They're trying really hard to impress her."

Levi glanced at her. "Tch, ain't gonna work, four eyes."

"They might steal her away."

"First off, they're both fifteen and it's fucked up. Secondly, she's my wife and we're deeply in love. Thirdly and last of all, it's just a phase. Teens fall in love and fall out of love fast. I'm not worried. I'm ignoring it."

She hummed a bit. "Okay, but you met your wife when you joined the scouts, right? You didn't fall out of love."

"I was in my early 20s." He shook his head. "I'm not worried about these kids. I was a young adult; these are kids."

"You're really not bothered?"

"Not one bit." He walked over to you. "Darling?"

You turned to your husband and smiled brightly. "Hey, honey. You okay?"

He took your hand and squeezed. "I am." He lifted your hand and kissed it. "I love you."

You pressed your hand against his cheek. "I love you, too." You leaned closer. "May I kiss you?"

He whined a bit. "Yeah..."

You tilted your head and kissed him, causing a strong blush to form. "You're so cute." You hummed a laugh. "I am going to nibble on your cheeks when we get home and give you lots of kisses."

He smiled a little. "Good. I want a lot of kisses."

"And cuddles?"

"Yes."

@ladycheesington @levisbrat25 @nyxiieluna @li-anne @galactict3a @youre-ackermine @thebobaprincess @2moth-anon2 @cypidity @nbinairyn @bts-spnlvr12 @darkstarlight82 @emilyyyy-08 @levistealeaf @pelicanpizza @hideandgopeep @demonic-bird @searriously @dreamerofthewest @abiatackerman @minminroie

[angelanimedesaray]

Wings in the Dark Chapter 34: Voices in the Silence

AN: Okay, not to panhandle for comments/feedback, but 34 and 35 has been a labor of love and frustration and pain that altogether turned out as 30,000 words before edits and was originally one chapter before I split it. Please, I love you all, please give feedback, I may actually cry if I hardly hear anything with how much time and effort, blood, sweat, and tears, has gone into these two chapters trying to get them JUST RIGHT.

And a side note/"Fun" fact for those who have seen Thunderbolts*, ah, I swear I wrote that last scene LONG before I went and watched Thunderbolts* O.o Pinky Promise. But the irony is not lost on me.

ACTUAL "Fun" Fact: Gasoline by Halsey and Far From Home by Five Finger Death Punch were my favorite songs to listen to writing this chapter <3 ;)

Characters: Levi, Fem!Vampire!Reader, Erwin, Hange; Briefly: Pyxis, Miche, Petra, Moblit, Eld, Gunther, Oluo, Various Unnamed Characters

Pairing: Levi x Fem!Vampire!Reader

Warnings: Language, Blood/Gore, Violence, Mentions/Descriptions of Violent Death, Intentional/Planned Mass Casualty Event, Disassociation, Mental/Emotional Breakdown, Panic/Anxiety Attack, Severe Trauma

Word Count: 13493

<----Previous Chapter Masterlist Next Chapter---->

*Reader’s POV*

Two days had not been enough time, and passed by faster than you could process.

The Scouts had all already been briefed on their positions and duties on the first of the two days, giving them time to confirm, memorize, and prepare themselves.  Those that had been selected to lead the three hundred thousand beyond the walls were admittedly given a wide berth by the others, no one quite sure how to talk to them and giving them the space they needed to process what they were going to be taking direct part in.  During the briefing, you had caught plenty of pale faces wilt in relief when they were put at the rear of the three hundred thousand in the hopes and beliefs that they would have a better chance at surviving if they were at the back.  When the names of the squads staying on the wall to cover a return were called, however, you’d also caught a few bitterly envious glances thrown the way of squads like Levi’s, Hange’s, and Miche’s that were going to be spared the worst of the ugliness despite their skills.

Or rather, because of them.

It might have just been in your head, but you’d felt more stares on you than the others, unable to skip a mandatory debriefing of what was to come and having to sit through the whole thing and simply endure, to pretend you couldn’t see or feel the other scouts staring you down for your apparent perfect health.

Levi didn’t say a word when you followed hot on his heels back to his office and pretty much refused to leave until the late hours of the night, and returned before the sun could rise high enough in the sky for more than a handful of scouts to be moving about headquarters.  That was enough to tell you it likely wasn’t in your head, and he had noticed it, too.

The second day you spent helping with the preparations for the operation that you could do from the safety of headquarters, memorizing the different parts of this operation as a whole so you could follow what was going to be happening, doing equipment checks, repairs, and refills to make sure everything was in perfect condition, running messages for Levi to the other Squad Leaders, Section Commanders, and Erwin, helping make sure all the horses were in peak condition, whatever you could do to keep yourself too busy to think.

But now it was here.  No more distractions, no more busywork, no more delays.  Trost was bursting with even more people than normal as the three hundred thousand and the Scouts–as well as the Garrison members that were helping to make sure all three hundred thousand were here and nobody slipped through the cracks–spilled into the city as preparations came to a head and the time to send them to the slaughter drew near.  The Scout horses were either bearing a rider and finding their positions to herd the three hundred thousand outside the walls, or were secured in military stables near the wall stations themselves for the lucky few that got to wait on the wall to cover the eventual return.

At the moment, you stood with the others waiting for the lift to finish bringing supplies up to the wall, half of the Scouts stationed on the wall already up top to unload the supplies.  There wasn’t much being used for the operation, since they didn’t want to waste supplies on an operation that was meant to fail.  Those that were going beyond the wall had spare sets of blades and an extra canister of gas per scout in the hopes of boosting their chances to return to the wall, hidden as best as possible to reduce the chances of the civilians making them a target to steal their supplies once the nightmare started.  

The Scouts on the wall had a full set of blades and filled gas with a few spares on hand just in case they were needed, though you had a sneaking suspicion that the reduced supplies were not only for conservation, but also to force those on the wall to be mindful of the limited supplies and not have the supplies to rescue a larger number of people in the return trip than what humanity could afford to take back.

Though the Scouts were reluctant and not at all happy to be doing this, Erwin was still being brutally efficient for the true goal in his planning.  It was probably for the best–it would deprive the nobility of any ammunition for grounds to disband the Scouts.

As you waited for the unloading up on the wall to finish and for the lift to be lowered once more, you tried to only look upwards at the wall or at the horses in the nearby stable, trying not to look at the throng of people being gathered to be ushered outside the gate.  Despite your best efforts, there wasn’t a lot for you to look at that didn’t have some heartbreaking scene for you to spot even just out of the corner of your eyes.

One man had a ‘spear’ that was basically a whittled large stick he had planted the blunt end of into the ground and was leaning heavily against, looking at the ground with a blank thousand meter stare.

Another woman was sitting on the ground, no weapons that you could see on her, hands loosely clasped in her lap as she silently cried and people shuffled around her.

What you assumed to be a brother and sister were leaning into one another for support, the brother trying to convince the smaller sister to take the larger kitchen knife they had for a weapon and give him the smaller one.

Close enough that you couldn’t block out the sounds of the sobbed pleas of the little girl, a mother and her daughter were saying goodbye to the father and husband, the mother having to carry the little girl away as she screamed and cried for her papa.

You wished you could close off your hearing, make it so you didn’t have to hear the tearful goodbyes and the sobbing, the pleas, but there were so many people that all the focusing in the world couldn’t drown them all out.  You could focus on the people giving orders, try to keep an ear open for if someone was trying to order you to do something, but even focusing couldn’t drown them all out, you still heard the louder people, the screaming children and cries, all cutting through your focus and demanding they be heard as well.

Your eyes were burning with tears you were already trying desperately to hold back, hands itching to raise and cover your ears, to try and physically block out the sounds that were wrapping around your heart like thorny vines and pulling, as if trying to yank your heart from your chest with every new cry.  But you were well aware that it would look like you were about to have a breakdown, and you couldn’t have that, not here, not in front of all these people that were about to march to their deaths.  Even if the emotions scalding your chest said that you very much were on the edge of emotionally cracking to be witnessing all of this, you could not react, you had to keep it all together, at least outwardly.

A loud clang next to you jostled you out of the overwhelming sounds for a moment, bringing you back to focus on your immediate surroundings as the lift returned to the bottom, the gate opening for the rest of the scouts that were going to be stationed on the wall to get on.  You filed on gratefully and perhaps a little too eagerly, stepping into the corner and leaning against the iron railing as the others also climbed on.  Petra made her way to your side, resting a tentative hand on your shoulder as everyone squeezed in and the gate was slid shut.

“Are you okay?” she asked, voice low enough to not draw the attention of the others in the lift, but loud enough to still be heard over the cacophony of all the people that were filling the streets.

“No,” you told her honestly.  No one was okay today, but some were much better at hiding it than others.  “But I’ll be okay when I’m needed,” you told her.

In response, she gave your shoulder a silent squeeze of reassurance and support, letting it drop away before someone could notice.

The waiting through it all and doing nothing was part of what was going to be so hard.  Once you would be able to go and do something, to cover a retreat and rescue someone, though, you would be able to focus and be more present, and would have the backs of your comrades to help make sure they didn’t die here.

Petra’s gaze was sympathetic, and you noticed that not only was she paler than normal, but there was a tremble in her hand.  You weren’t the only one, then.  All of you were trying to put on a brave face, to stay calm enough that it would hopefully strengthen the people around you to get this done and over with.

The Garrison were busy clearing Titans from the immediate area outside of the wall to clear the way for the three hundred thousand to leave.  Once they did, the large force could hopefully get a couple miles out before running into more Titans, and hopefully it would be far enough none of them could see or hear what was happening.

Hopefully they got far enough away that you wouldn’t be able to see or hear what was happening.

The lift was slow to raise, bringing you higher and higher, allowing you to see more of Trost and to see just how far the crowd that was being herded together stretched, could see the Garrison soldiers standing on roofs and posted at the ends of roads and alleys to make sure the selected civilians didn’t try to bolt.  You’d already heard of one or two desperate souls that had tried and it had ended…badly for them, and you were certain there had been others in the past two days.  How many had been forced back into this crowd, and how many had been killed already?

Don’t be sick.  If you’re sick all the way up here, the people down below certainly won’t thank you for it.

The lift finally came high enough that you could simply turn your head and start to see the top of the wall, several pairs of boots standing near the edge waiting for the lift to finish rising.  You knew which one was Levi before the lift even finished its ascent, gaze meeting his as the lift slowed and came to a stop.

They were a darker grey blue than normal, and it wasn’t just because his back was to the sun right now and his shadow was being cast in front of him.  His arms were crossed over his chest while he waited, the wind this high up blowing his hair and cape around in wild bursts from the occasional stronger gust that he seemed to be ignoring entirely.

He was far more capable of hiding his true feelings on this whole mess than you were, at least right now.  In the more private spaces you two shared you had seen plenty to let you know how much he was hating every second of this.  But up here, amongst the other soldiers and on the way in when you were passing civilians, he remained stoic, eyes fixed forwards, the only giveaway to how he truly felt the darker look in his eyes and the tension you knew how to spot after you’d seen him so many times completely at ease.  You could see he was holding his shoulders higher, that his grip on things was tighter, and his lips were a bit thinner from being pressed together as if he was holding back a scowl or a blatant frown.

Thankfully, as the lift brought you level with the top of the wall, the wind helped to drown out the specifics of the words down below, though you could still hear the mass of sound, the hum of people speaking, and cries and wails of distress and parting still reached your more sensitive ears all the way up here.  Sometimes it felt like the wind was carrying them upwards to you, as if the sound was trying to push you forwards and over the other edge of the wall.

Once the gate opened, those inside broke apart and went with the officers waiting for the rest of their squads to head to their positions on the wall, Levi waiting for you and Petra to eventually disembark just before a group of three that had been reluctantly huddled into the other far corner.  As you came close, Levi took what seemed to be a subconscious half step in your direction, bringing him closer to you as he turned to start walking, leading the two of you off to the left of the lift.

“We’re on the first watch shift for the eastern side of the wall.  Hange’s squad will relieve us after a couple hours and we’ll be on standby with Command until it’s time to rotate again,” Levi reminded the two of you.

You could see Oluo, Gunther, and Eld waiting not too far up ahead, in full gear, sulking and grim each in their own ways.  Eld was staring south out beyond the wall into the lost Maria territory, Oluo kicking idly at the wall beneath him, and Gunther keeping his gaze fixed on the three approaching him with a look that seemed more vacant than focused.

There were no illusions up here about what was actually happening.  Everyone up here didn’t have civilians to put up a front for and were well aware of what the purpose of this mission was.  Up here, it was grim acceptance of a horrific duty.

“For Miche’s Squad,” you commented for Levi, showing that you had heard his reminder and knew what squad you would take the place of after standby.

If this even took that long, with how poorly equipped the civilians were.  They didn’t have a fighting chance, just scraps to cling to in vain for a feeble illusion of comfort.

Once the whole squad had regrouped, Levi divided everyone into pairs–Gunther and Oluo, Petra and Eld, and of course Levi put you with him–and told everyone to spread out on this eastern part of the border wall of Trost, making sure they could still comfortably see the next group over if they needed to pass along information about something spotted.  Levi put you and him in the middle position of the three groups, further away from the center over the gate but not so far from the exit point that the two of you would be as far removed from the three hundred thousand as you could be while still being part of this operation.

As tempted as he may have been to do so, he still did not use his position to get the two of you out of this, but rather put you as close to the worst of it as he could and still give the two of you a bit of privacy from the other squads and command located closer to the center over the gate.

You and Levi walked in silence for the first few minutes, Oluo and Gunther up ahead as they made their way to the farthest point Levi had given.  It was nice to have something else to focus on to drown out a touch more of the noise below.  Up here you could still hear what was happening on the streets below, but you could also hear the wind blowing by, the footsteps of your squad traversing the wall and the slight rattle of the gear shifting and bumping against your thighs with every step, could hear Levi’s steady breathing if you focused on it, could hear his heartbeat strong and rhythmic beside you–

It made the sounds down below a little less distinct, though they were still present.

Levi’s gaze slid to you walking a half a step behind him and within arm’s reach beside him, subtly analyzing the way you were carrying yourself, the emotions flickering in your eyes, the expression on your face as you walked in silence together.  You pretended you didn’t notice, though the façade disappeared once Levi stepped close enough his hand could drop to yours and his fingers could gently brush against the back of your hand.  The gesture was slight and brief, but you felt your skin tingle and warm where he’d touched, and you felt reassured, even if it was only for a few moments, to have him there beside you.

Not alone; weathering it together, like you’d silently promised after Erwin had informed you this was happening.  You were standing with someone who was able to read you well enough he would know if you needed support, and Levi pairing with you when he divided the squad had made sure you would be with him through every step.  Your job would be to return in kind while the two of you waited for your part at the finale of this nightmare.

When the two of you reached where you were supposed to be, Levi came to a slow stop, turning to face out towards the territory of Maria beside you, gaze fixed on the horizon for a few seconds before his gaze lowered to the hills, forests, and fields that were in the more immediate view.

“For now, we keep an eye out for Titans in the area–they need enough clearance to get far enough from Rose they don’t end up attracting a mess of Titans to Trost on their way out.  Once the way’s clear several miles out, they’ll start the operation,” Levi reminded you, and you wondered if he was repeating the information just to try and keep you focused on the here and now instead of the horrific thoughts of what was to come that wanted to seep into every dark crevice of your mind.

“And then we wait until whatever small force is left, returns,” you responded quietly, watching a small formation of birds flying overhead and out over the lost territory stretching out in front of you.

Levi didn’t answer, but it was enough that he didn’t withdraw, either, keeping himself planted at your side overlooking the territory in front of the two of you.

Occasionally, a small team of Garrison soldiers would jump down with their ODM gear and work together to slice through the nape of a Titan, gradually clearing the space that the force below would have to traverse.  The scouts on the wall stayed stationary during the whole process, under strict orders to conserve their supplies until the return trip and leave this part to the Garrison soldiers.  When you glanced to the members of your squad in their respective positions to the left and right of where you and Levi were standing, you could see them shifting restlessly while the Garrison worked, wanting to go out and assist, to help cover the backs of their fellow soldiers, but they held to their orders and stayed where they were, watching and waiting, signaling whenever they spotted a Titan on the horizon headed their way.

You didn’t know how much time passed like that with you and Levi standing close enough your shoulders would brush, but not talking, occasionally signaling that a Titan had been spotted, watching the surrounding area and the Garrison soldiers working their way much slower through the Titans along the wall than the Scouts would have if they were the ones doing the exterminating.

It did, however, give the soldiers inside Trost time to make sure that everyone was gathered and accounted for in the masses down below, and eventually you spotted a Garrison soldier use their ODM gear instead of the lift to get to where command was stationed just above the gate to deliver a message, speaking with Commander Erwin and the Garrison Commander…Pyxis, before receiving their orders and heading back down.

Not long after their departure, the bells of the city began to ring, and you felt your heart leap so violently into your throat you thought that you were going to vomit it right out onto the wall beneath you.  You leaned forward slightly from the force of it, the height of the wall and the sheer drop in front of you making you dizzy for the first time ever as you realized it was here, it was happening.

“Steady,” you heard Levi say beside you, and suddenly you felt his hand in yours, fingers twining tightly with your own, your now joined hands hidden between the two of you so no one else would see.  His grip was firm, hands warm, his calluses rough, but he held you to his side with his strength, as if keeping you anchored right there, pulling you slightly back from the edge that had made you dizzy to look down and keeping your moment of distress from sending you toppling over.

Your return grip was desperate in how tightly it clung to him, though you were careful not to use so much strength you accidentally broke any of the bones in his hand.  Instead, you let more of your arm hook into his, shuffling slightly closer and trying to get your heart to calm back down as the tolling of the bells continued relentlessly, causing your heart to pound painfully in your chest as frantic panic tried to seep into your bones.

This can’t be happening, this isn’t happening.  This is wrong, it’s vile, so many people, so many families getting torn apart, and we’re just going to stand here and let the Titans rip them apart and devour them?  We’re just going to do nothing?  How can this be happening, how can we be agreeing to this, letting this play out?  We should be saving people, not killing them, we’re not here to kill such a large part of humanity, we’re supposed to be preserving it.

The words clawed into your throat like Emery’s fingers had gouged your arms when he met Levi, trying to rake their way out of your throat by force in a scream that felt like it would tear you apart from the inside if you let it find purchase.  But you held them trapped, kept your lips pressed firmly together and your eyes unseeing on the horizon as the gate for Trost lifted.

You knew why this was happening.  You knew it had to happen.  Knew you had to stand here and let it play out, and something inside you was turning wrathful and desperate to have to go against your instinct and desire to do something.  You refused to open your mouth and let it free, though.  You swallowed it down as best you could and stayed rooted in the spot, refusing to look down as calls to advance and flimsy, hollow shouts to fight for humanity and reclaim the land urged the three hundred thousand through the gates, the massive crowd spilling into the lost land stretching out in front of you.

Neither of you mentioned the tremble in your hand, or the blank stare you had that gave away the fact that you weren’t doing your job as a lookout at all right now and were leaving that part to Levi while you grappled for internal stability.  You didn’t mention that you felt Levi’s grip tighten on your own when it started, or how you heard his heartbeat pick up speed.

When the last of the three hundred thousand passed the gates, it lowered once more, the heavy thud of the thick spikes digging once more into the earth a haunting sound that seemed to echo in your ears with morbid finality.

The squad was on standby near the command’s post when you first started to hear it.

Initially, you thought your mind was playing tricks on you, the anticipation and the waiting while filled with dread and unable to do anything but imagine what was happening or about to happen, while also trying to shove the thoughts aside and focus on anything else, could have easily conjured sounds that you imagined you heard in the wind.  Everyone was restless and on edge, though they were all presenting it in different ways as they all waited for some kind of sign or signal that would tell them what was happening.  However, no one wanted to speak, so the silence was filled only by the wind and the movement of the people on the wall.

That notion evaporated when you heard it again only moments later, carried to you on the wind and a bit louder than the first had been.

Screaming.  Blood curdling screams that made chills slip down your spine and set your teeth on edge.

Considering no one else seemed to be reacting to it, only you could hear it.  You and your damned vampire senses could hear the sounds of a massacre underway who knew how far away, carried to you on the wind.

Don’t, don’t focus on it, don’t think about it, focus on someone else, anyone else–

Someone was shrieking so loud and forcefully it made your throat hurt to hear, before it abruptly ended.

It was too silent up here, everyone else was stuck in the suspended silence of waiting and watching, but you, you could hear the man screaming and sobbing for his mother and father, the howled curses thrown at someone for breaking the speaker’s leg so that the Titans would get them instead, the woman shrieking for the scouts to do something–

“Y/N.”

Levi’s voice next to you was just enough to briefly pull you back to where you were standing, a hand pressed against your stomach as if you were trying to physically hold back the nausea overcoming you.  He only said your name, and it only worked for the few seconds he was speaking before the sounds returned of people screaming, pleading, cursing, dying–

“Talk to me.  Please,” you asked, voice coming out in a ragged gasp as the horror and grief and helplessness scorched you from the inside out.  You could not stand here and listen to this–there would be nothing left of you.

“Are you–?”

“I can hear them,” you whispered, and you heard Levi’s heartbeat pick up at your admission, could tell he was standing perfectly still beside you.  “Please.  I need something else to listen to, I can’t…”

More screams for parents that couldn’t come save their children, whether they were long gone in the ground or somewhere behind the safety of the walls and unable to hear their pleas.

“If you want someone to ramble at you, I’m shit at that, Hange might be better–”

“Hange’s taking the lookout position right now, and I’m not in her squad.  Levi, I just…I just need you to talk to me, please.  Anything.  I’ll even listen to every shit joke you can think of, just–please.”

You looked up at him at last with your last plea, meeting his gaze to see that they were slightly wider than normal, he was taken aback, and the look in his eyes to see the pain mounting in yours as you continued to have to listen in the silence–

Levi’s hand was suddenly on your elbow, pulling you with him towards the western stretch of the wall.  “Erwin!  We’re doing a lap, we’ll be back,” Levi called to Erwin without looking back or waiting for an answer.  The squad hadn’t been on standby that long, so you could probably make a lap around Trost and still get back before it was time to relieve Miche’s squad from their watch.

You could feel Erwin’s gaze burning into your back as the two of you walked away, but you didn’t turn around, focused on trying to swallow down the distress that was bubbling in your throat, the hollow feeling being carved into your chest with every scream and plea you overheard.  Levi let go of your elbow once you were walking with him, but he stayed right at your side with how unsteadily you still walked, dizzy with the overwhelming emotions again, the distress, the inability to shut it out.

You had been around death, had heard scouts devoured by Titans while testing out your abilities in the field, had heard murders, heard heartbreaking final moments, heard families butchered during Madaline’s rampage, had been an instrument of death yourself for decades.  Death was not new to you.

What made this so much different was the sheer scale of it all, how it had been intentional and sanctioned, and how you would continue to have to do nothing until there was an acceptable amount of survivors.  The nature of this whole thing…was so much different than anything you’d witnessed or been a part of so far.

And it was tearing you apart from the inside out.

After the two of you had left the command station that had the more concentrated gathering of soldiers, Levi guided you both to walk along the inner edge of the wall, giving you a bit more space from the members of Miche’s squad that were walking along the outer edge of the wall to patrol while on their watch.  It gave you both a bit more privacy, and made it harder for whatever the two of you were going to talk about–or rather, what Levi was going to talk to you about–to be overheard.  You wanted him to already be speaking, for his voice to distract you and drown out the death and horror biting into you down to the bone.  He probably needed the time to think of what to say when you’d simply told him anything.

“I was the boy with Kenny the Ripper.”

Well, that certainly got your attention.  He definitely knew how to distract you from your own thoughts and what you could hear to shift all your attention to him.

You had already suspected–not known, but with the way he had acted when he asked you if you’d ever targeted Kenny the Ripper what felt like ages ago, and the way he’d reacted to your answer, had made you suspect that he was.

That small boy with the haunted blank expression and the tattered appearance, that had looked gaunt and too thin, though seemed to be regaining color and body mass–

That had probably been starving before being in Kenny’s care, which also told you that you had not been wrong in your theory that he had starved before, that this crisis inside the walls had not been the first time he’d started to suffer from that deep of a hunger.

You had asked Levi to talk to distract you, so he didn’t let the statement hang in the air–he instead pushed forward, continuing to talk as you’d asked so that you could focus just on him and his voice.  He wasn’t giving you time to fully process what he was saying, but he also wasn’t giving you time to start to hear the massacre beyond the walls again, either.

“Kenny and I didn’t live together that long, but he taught me how to survive down there,” Levi continued.  He wasn’t exactly looking at you, keeping his gaze instead on the wall ahead that you were walking along, and occasionally turning his head to track the soldiers the two of you were passing so he’d know when to lower his voice to avoid being overheard.  “I’d have died down there if it wasn’t for him.  Then one day he disappeared.  When you told me about your diet, and how long you were in the Underground, I thought you might have the answer for what happened, even if it was going to be a shitty one.  Obviously, that wasn’t the case.”

You didn’t know a lot of the context to that story, but given the fact that he still thought about Kenny’s disappearance to this day and had wanted an answer even if it was a bad one–in this case, the possibility of you turning Kenny into your meal being the reason why he never came back–it was obvious to you that there was more to that story than he was telling you.  You were just getting an abbreviated version of what happened that cut out most of the emotion and depth and left only the basics to be picked through.  You’d have asked for more, but him simply choosing to talk about this now felt big, and you needed to listen to drown out the world.  If you spoke, you could start to hear the massacre you wanted to hear as little of as possible for the sake of your sanity.  So, you were at the mercy of whatever Levi felt inclined to share.  Maybe one day in the future if you were feeling brave, you would ask questions to find out more, but for now, you listened.

He paused briefly, just long enough to take a breath and choose what to say next, though it also allowed a brief lull to see if you could still hear the massacre as you two slowly walked further away from it.

As the screams started to ring in your ears again, Levi spoke.

“Tell me if you stop hearing it.  The other side of Trost at least might be far enough to no longer hear,” he instructed, taking your continued silence as your answer that yes, you could still hear.  Levi’s expression shifted to a frown, thinking over what to say next, probably tossing aside questions you would have to talk to answer and trying to think of things he could simply tell you instead.

“I…didn’t have a father.  And my mother, I remember her, but she died when I was still young.”  You saw the tension in his neck and shoulders somehow get tighter, saw the slight bob of his throat as he swallowed and apparently decided he wasn’t ready to have that conversation–the strained tenderness you caught flashing in his eyes before he turned his head to watch the last few people along this stretch of the wall as you two passed by gave him away–and he quickly changed the subject again. 

“Kenny found me shortly after that.  After he left, I was on my own.  Until a smartass tried to jump and recruit me one day.”

There was something…gentler, about the way he said smartass.  Whoever he was referring to, it wasn’t with anger or irritation, but…care.

And an undercurrent of sorrow.

“There’s not much to say about the rest of the time I was down there.  I survived.  Made money.  Was trying to afford citizenship on the surface.  Came upside for a job.  Got roped into the Survey Corps…decided to stay.”

The brief pause and the abrupt end of the story, even for his brief bare details version of the story he was telling you, told you that it wasn’t so simple.  Clearly, though, he was deciding now was not the time to get into the details of all that.

The way he was telling it all reminded you of how you would speak about your own time Underground or the more gruesome parts of your vampirism–trying to skip past the really unpleasant details and keep it to the bare minimum to answer the questions without making people horrified or pity you for the true ugliness it had been.

Levi seemed to notice the thousand questions burning in your gaze that you were trying to bite down, because a soft ‘Tch’ escaped him as you two continued to walk, at this point pulling farther and farther away from where the soldiers on the wall currently were stationed and gaining more and more privacy.  “If you want to know the details so bad, you can ask another time.  Just not right now.”

In answer, and after glancing back to make sure that the others were far enough away that you had enough privacy to do so, you stepped closer to Levi, reaching out to slip your hand into his, unsurprised to find that he had been clenching a fist beneath the cover of his cape, as if physically holding back the details of his brief story that he’d decided were not details to share right now.

Once he felt your fingers brush against his hand, the fist relaxed, and you were able to slide your fingers between his and gently twine them together in the affectionate gesture that had become second nature to you.  Just to let him know you did want to know, and you would ask later, you gave his hand a little squeeze, which prompted his thumb to gently run over the back of your hand in response.

The silence lingered a few moments too long, and you could hear the sounds being carried to you on the wind again.  Quieter this time, and not as distinct, but still heard well enough that your hand instinctively tightened around Levi’s.

He didn’t need to ask to know, a soft sigh escaping him as he pulled you a bit closer and tried to think up more to say that didn’t require so many breaks and skipped details.

“Y’know, it’s hard to think of shit to say that doesn’t require more talking from you than me.  Most of what I’m thinking of is questions, and since you’re not asking any, it doesn’t leave me a lot to work with,” he grumbled, the complaint seeming to be less of a genuine complaint and more to fill the silence–something he’d normally let sit comfortably between the two of you.  He was just trying not to let the silence linger long enough for you to continue to hear the massacre happening.

If he needed something to work with, then…

“What was your mother like?”

Now it was his turn to have a reaction to the unexpected words.  His gaze snapped right to you, eyebrows raised, eyes slightly wide, surprised into silence for a few heartbeats.

Of all the things you could have gone with–what was it like living with Kenny the Ripper, who was the Smartass, what was the job he went topside to do, what was his trade underground, how the hell had he gotten roped into the Survey Corps and what made him decide to stay, wondering if the two of you crossed paths more than the one time in the more than twenty years you’d both been down there–you asked him about his mother.  Clearly, it wasn’t the thread that he’d been expecting you to pull on.

Levi looked away, the hand threaded into yours tightening for a moment as he turned his attention back to the top of the walls, considering what was the best way to put whatever was circulating in his mind.

“She was…very beautiful,” Levi said, his voice so soft you had to strain to hear it above the wind even with your currently troublesome heightened hearing.  “And elegant.  She always seemed out of place in the Underground.  Everything was shit and filth, but she was…she wasn’t.”

There was an almost reverence that he spoke with, and the way he took his time with his words made you feel like you could feel him reaching for the memories, doing his best to recall as clearly as he could.  He’d said she’d died when he was young.  The effort you felt from him just to recall that little bit made you wonder how young.

You were trepidatious to speak up, to prod into what might have been a sensitive subject, but he’d opened up a little so far, and his complaint had made it clear that you needed to ask a few questions so he could answer if you wanted him to keep talking.  So, you cautiously attempted to ask a bit more about her.

“How did she–?”

“She got sick.”

The short and abrupt response that cut off your question before you could finish told you not to press any farther into that bit of his past, not right now.  It also, however, answered your question, and painted more of a picture than others might understand with those three simple words.  Having lived Underground for almost forty years yourself, you knew how bad it was, knew how hard it was to get medicine, that any decent doctor was found topside, not in the bowels of the Underground.  If she got sick and they were living anything like the vast majority of the Underground residents, there wouldn’t have been anything to do for her except watch, especially for him if he’d been as young as his need to reach for distant memories to remember her suggested.

His grip on your hand was tight, tighter than someone without your vampiric strength may have been able to tolerate, but he hadn’t withdrawn it, hadn’t withdrawn from you.  It was your sign to gracefully back down and change the subject again.

“...I see.”  You didn’t want to give the moment too much time to breathe, but you were grappling with what to say, what didn’t feel…wrong to be talking about while people were dying.

Levi needed a couple more moments to regather himself after the unexpected turn of conversation towards his mother, and when he spoke, despite what you’d asked him when the two of you started walking, he seemed to have decided to break the unspoken rule of the conversation and bring up what was happening, perhaps deciding that even if it was not what you wanted right now, the two of you needed to talk about this.

“Y/N, you couldn’t have done anything to stop this.  None of us could.”

“...I know,” you whispered, your eyes fixed downwards at the city below, one that was unnaturally quiet today.  You knew you should stay silent and let Levi talk, let him attempt to calm you down a bit more, but now that he’d broached the subject, you wanted to say more, to vent some of what had been making you feel like you were on the brink of spiraling that you’d been trying not to think about, out.

“But that’s not the problem.  I know why it's happening, why we have to, I understand that–if I didn't, I wouldn't be here.  I understand having to do what it takes to survive, so others can survive.  I understand that I can't do anything to change it, but that's the problem.  I can’t do anything.  I came here to help, to save people, to make my abilities worth something, to be useful, to make all those deaths I caused so I could survive not be for nothing.  But right now all I can do is wait for them to die…and listen to it.  And everything I'm feeling now, so strongly, I can't–I just feel…helpless.”

As you mentioned it, you realized that you hadn’t heard anything on the wind while you’d been talking–you were finally far enough away that you couldn’t hear the massacre beyond the walls if you weren’t purposely listening for it.  The realization made some of the tension drain from your shoulders, your pace slowing so you could linger in the relief of not having to actively hear the death of all those people.

As soon as you had the thought, you felt horrible for thinking it, for feeling relief to not witness it despite your part in carrying it out, however small it was.

Levi noticed that you’d slowed down, matching his pace with yours.  He didn’t ask why you were suddenly reducing your speed, able to tell that it meant you couldn’t hear the massacre anymore if you weren’t trying to get away from it as fast as possible.  As such, he only walked a couple more steps with you before he urged you to come to a stop with a gentle tug on your hand, turning so he was standing directly in front of you.  He let go of your hand once the two of you were standing face to face, not even allowing you the comforting distraction of his hand in yours so you could focus entirely on whatever he was about to tell you.

“Y/N, this won’t be the only time people die to make everyone else’s survival possible.  It’s going to happen again,” Levi told you, gaze unwavering from your own as if the intensity in his eyes could drive his point deeper home.  “You’re going to have to come to terms with the fact that no matter how hard you try, there are going to be times you’re helpless, people are going to die so you can live or humanity can survive, there are going to be times all the death feels pointless.”

Levi looked away and down at the city like you had, and the silence stretched, his words hanging heavy in the air between the two of you, demanding to be acknowledged and felt.  It was a harsh reality, but…he’d been right to bring it up.  It was something you needed to hear, something you needed to come to terms with. 

“Most of humanity wants to withdraw behind the walls and try to hide from it all.  Nothing’s going to get better if they have their way.  Right now, the Scouts are the ones trying to change that, trying to change humanity’s chances and fight back.”  Levi’s gaze returned to yours, a piercing clarity in his steel grey eyes that drove his words home.  “You’re still in the best place to try and make a difference.  And you’re not the only one that wants to make sure all this death means something.”

Make sure all this death means something.

That was something you could certainly understand, that resonated within the scars and wounds you’d carried with you into the Scouts.  You’d wanted to make all the death that had sustained you the past few decades mean something.  Perhaps another part of the reason you were reacting so strongly was because of the sheer weight of all these deaths added to your shoulders, and the prayer that their deaths would mean something, that this would make a change for the better inside the walls, that things would start to turn around.  The need for it to mean enough to make it worth it…you’d come to the Scouts with blood drenching your hands and the need to make it worth it.

You needed this to be worth it, too.

First you had to survive it.  Not physically, physically Erwin was keeping you out of almost all of the danger.  But emotionally…

Emotionally, each scream felt like a laceration, each ignored cry for help like someone had ripped open your ribcage in search of your heart.  Never before had you hated your heightened emotions so much, the fact that you felt everything so deeply a curse that was going to burn you alive from the inside out and leave you hollow by the end of this if you weren’t careful.  You were cracking under the pain of it all–no, pain was too mild, for you it was stoked into agony–and trying desperately to hold on until the end of the operation, until you could get behind closed doors.

That would be when you could shatter, where it wouldn’t matter when you broke because there was no morale to attempt to preserve, no civilians to put on a brave face in front of, no fellow soldiers you would negatively impact or may forever look at you differently if you shattered in front of them under what seemed to them like no more than the pressure of the wait.

They needed to know they could rely on you when things got ugly like this, and if you shattered in front of everyone when all that was happening was the waiting, they may never trust you in the moment again.

You closed your eyes, trying to take advantage of the silence to regather yourself, to try and shore up your mental and emotional defenses now that you knew when you returned you were going to have to continue to listen to people being ripped to shreds and eaten only a few miles from the walls.  You hadn’t been prepared for it when it first happened, but now that you knew, now that you could take a moment to breathe and regather yourself, maybe…

Having to listen would still be terrifyingly hellish, and Levi would be the only one that knew what was happening, but maybe you could be at least prepared and collected enough to make it through to the end of this operation without cracking in front of everyone else.

Levi shifted closer, and the feel of his fingers curling around your chin prompted you to open your eyes to look at him.  He tilted your head to the perfect angle to allow him to kiss you, the press of his lips soft in stark contrast to the words he’d just said to give you a small dose of reality.  The kiss itself was far too brief for your liking–even with the somber and horrifying situation the two of you were in, you wished he'd kiss you longer, let it last a few moments more.  However, when he pulled away his eyes were searching yours, seeking to know if you were internally steady once more, or at least collected enough to keep moving.

“We can’t stay here.  I told Erwin we were doing a lap, not sightseeing.”

You nodded at the reminder, looking down the length of the wall the two of you still had to walk on the west side of Trost–and you still had to loop all the way back around to the gate at the front.  He was right–you couldn’t afford to linger, you would be expected to return before survivors could start making it back to the wall or before Miche’s squad handed off their lookout position to Levi’s–whichever came first.

Levi’s hand dropped from the grip on your chin to instead resume holding your hand, pulling you close to his side as the two of you walked as if to wordlessly remind you to lean on him for support, tucking his arm in with yours to hold you even closer and make it even harder to take a step away and untangle yourself–not that you were even attempting to do so.

Once you started walking, the comfortable silence that usually settled between the two of you finally returned, though it wasn’t quite the same–not with the knowledge of what was happening at this very moment.  But neither of you felt inclined to break that silence, which gave you the time to ruminate on Levi’s words and better prepare yourself for what you were going to be returning to.

As best as you could, anyway, which you still feared wasn't enough.

The rest of the walk with Levi was mostly silent, which you appreciated, knowing that once you got back to the gate you wouldn’t have the silence again until you returned to headquarters.  The only times that silence was broken was when you asked if Levi would continue to talk to you when you reached earshot of the massacre again–which he agreed to try, of course–and when Levi spoke up to ask if you would be able to hold out until the two of you were back at headquarters.  You weren’t too optimistic, but it was something you were going to have to manage to pull off, either way. 

He knew when you came within range to hear the massacre again.  Your demeanor had switched from the refuge seeking closeness with the comfortable hold on his hand to stiff and upright, your grip squeezing tight enough it seemed you were trying to fuse your hands together.  If you hadn’t been so distressed to still be hearing death, you would have laughed at the fact that of all the things he could have talked about, he started talking about ODM maneuvers.  Advice, critiques, verbal rundowns on some of the coordinated team maneuvers that you tended to practice with the others, advice based on the different environments you could end up in from forests to towns to open fields.

At least it was a topic he could keep going for some time.  When he ran out of things to say about the maneuvers, he switched to an abrupt semi-lecture about making sure you stayed safe when you were leading the formation and advice on how to do that and how to safely engage Titans on your own as much as possible–using some abnormals he’d run into and their strange behavior that could be a problem for even you as examples for why he was telling you something you already knew.  He wanted to make sure that the point was still driven home, that you stayed cautious and made sure to observe first instead of just rushing right into danger.

Recklessness would get even you killed.  That was something you had discussed already but he was taking the time to reiterate.  You supposed now was as good a time as ever to say as much, when all you could really do was listen intently and silently.

Despite not being a normally chatty person, Levi did a fairly good job at talking enough to keep you distracted during most of the wait.  His talkativeness–only for you–did draw some stares, and you were aware that Erwin had been watching the two of you and your behavior since you’d returned. 

In fact, the rest of Levi’s squad were watching how much he spoke with you, how focused he was on you and your own lack of responsiveness he didn’t seem to be taking personally.  You could feel Hange’s eyes occasionally drifting to you as well from across the way, and would have caught her staring more than once if you hadn’t been so focused on Levi.  

However, they were all ignored in favor of giving you something to listen to, and while he did talk fairly consistently, he didn’t speak very loudly.  You hadn’t suggested he do it, and it may have been more about trying to keep the talkativeness and conversation as private as it could be, but his quieter words forced you to focus your hearing more intentionally on him, allowing you to block out more of the sounds that tried to reach you naturally from out in Maria territory.

He couldn’t block every sound, however, as much as you wished he could.  He could only do so much, and despite his best efforts and your focus, the worst of the massacre still made it to your ears, refusing to be ignored.

The most bloodcurdling screams, the sound of bones crunching, the loudest or most high pitched screams and pleas, and the occasional Titan roar.  You could still hear it–not all of it, not as much, but enough.

When Levi noticed you pale, saw you weren’t as focused on his words, caught a tremble in your hands or a shudder wrack your body, he would find an excuse to touch you–nothing too blatantly intimate or clingy.  He would disguise the contact meant to try and ground you back in the present as a thwack on the head that felt more like a soft tap, a poke in the shoulder that felt like a light jostle, or a ‘kick’ at the ankle that was more of a gentle nudge.

Levi tried, and he did make it better to an extent.  His distractions did keep you from having to bear the full brunt of the horror of the operation at least in that moment–but there was only so much he could do.  There was only so much any of you could do in this situation.

By the time the first cry of a returning force was sent up, your nerves were frayed and snapping, your resolve to stay on that wall crumbling as if one of those damn special Titan’s had shown up to punch a hole through them.  By then, you weren’t sure which had been worse–the sounds of the massacre making its way towards you, or the silence that had followed afterwards.

Still, despite the wear of the past several hours that had made your soul heavy and caused what felt like the beginning of fracturing inside your core, you felt that horrible cocktail of guilt and relief seeping back inside you to hear of the first sighting of survivors.

Almost over.  Almost over.  Almost over.

You didn’t let yourself think about what came after, when you were in the silence of your room with no more distractions.

That wasn’t a problem for you to tackle while you were in the home stretch of the operation, that was a problem for when it happened.  You could only handle this one step at a time, and even then, you did not have as good of a handle on it as you were trying to pretend you did.

The trip back was silent.

Not even the horses seemed to be making much noise, their hooves sounding distant and muffled…or perhaps that was just you and the state of numb shock you seemed to be settling into after the operation had finally come to its gorey end.

Blood stained your clothes, a large dark smear staining the white shirt of your uniform and making the fabric stick and cake against your skin.  Your cloak was similarly marred with large splatters of deep crimson, the white feathers on the wings of freedom crest turned red and the blue turned black from the stains.  Stains that would not evaporate in a puff of steam, because most of the blood that still covered you now was the blood of people you’d been fighting to pull to safety, not the handful of Titans you’d killed in the process.

You’d been an even more terrifying sight earlier, before the Titan blood had evaporated to leave behind only the evidence of the people you’d tried to save.

You wished it had all been a blur, that you didn’t remember it all so clearly.  But you remembered every second as sharply as the intensity in Levi’s eyes when he’d been hostile towards you in those early days.

The largest stains on your cloak had been from the woman who’d been bleeding from her abdomen that you had tried to carry on your back up the wall to safety, who had slipped free from a weakening grip around your shoulders and the slickness of the blood soaking your back, had gripped at and torn your cloak on the way down, before plummeting into the mouth of a waiting Titan.

The crimson pool on the front of your shirt came from correcting your mistake and carrying a man bleeding out from a missing arm in front of you as you scaled the wall, trying to get him help before he died from the blood loss.

Blood was still spattered on your face from the young man whose insides had been crushed by a Titan hand seconds before you could reach him, that you had still tried to get to the top in the hopes someone could help, his last few ‘breaths’ coughs of blood onto your face and neck before he passed in your arms before you could even get him to the top of Trost’s wall.

On and on the list went, faces of people you’d been too late to save or had been beyond your help by the time you reached them–beyond help you could give in front of the Scouts and Garrison, anyway, or who had died before you could even have the chance to make such a choice.

Not one of the faces you’d seen on the wall or in the rescue had been the faces of the people you’d noticed this morning in Trost while waiting to go up the wall.  The fraction of scouts who had returned that had been sent out to guide the three hundred thousand had been so slim, especially in comparison to the surviving civilians, that when you had heard so few had returned, when you heard some of the sobbed stories of scouts sacrificing themselves to give civilians the chance to survive near the end, you had not been able to contain your reaction entirely, having to turn away and find an isolated corner to have a moment.  You had stifled sobs and ruthlessly wiped away tears to hear how many had still died to give more of the people a chance to survive.

You didn’t think you could see any of the faces from your graduating Cadet Corps class that had come to the Scouts among the survivors.

Were you the last one of your class left standing already, at least out of those who had come to the Scouts?  Had they all died in this operation?

You weren’t sure when exactly the shock settled in.  Maybe it was when you found out how few scouts returned.  Maybe it was when you heard that the early estimate for the number of people to return from the operation was a measly 185, roughly.  Maybe it was when the adrenaline from the rescue attempts and the fighting with the Titans had come to a halt and the shock was part of your crash.

Through the shock, you knew that Levi was staying right at your side.  He was bloody himself, though he’d wiped what he could from his hands and face earlier and only had the stains that would take a more thorough wash to get, now.  You knew he’d lost a few civilians like you had–you’d tried to intervene on his behalf to buy him time more than once, tried to take care of Titans that were bearing down on him when he was trying to get someone to safety.  Sometimes it was simply too late, sometimes they didn’t even know how bad their wounds were until it was too late, and very few of the survivors had been practically unscathed.  This had been an operation where no one could get out without getting bloody.

Now, however, his horse walked so close to your own that sometimes your legs would brush together, though Levi took care not to guide his horse so close that your legs were crushed between the sides of the horses.  You weren’t guiding Zephyr, not really, but the mare knew to follow the rest of the group, and with Levi’s horse right beside her, she also didn’t wander off and stayed on point.  Levi didn’t speak, didn’t reach out to touch you, didn’t try to wipe the blood from your face or try to offer comfort.  Not yet.  Not in front of all these people, soldier and civilian as you made your silent march back to headquarters, ears rushing with the flow of your own blood and ringing with the sounds of the blood-soaked retreat.

You barely noticed when Zephyr slowed, when you stopped moving, when Levi dismounted his horse beside you–you didn’t even process that he hadn’t stopped at the stables with everyone else, but had snagged Hange to join the two of you as you disappeared further along and around a corner, having Hange there simply to bring the horses back to the stables for the two of you–once he got you down.

When his hand gently covered your own where it was resting in your lap with a loose grip on the reins, you slowly blinked to, recognizing that he’d brought you to the familiar sight of your little garden to have some privacy, to properly try to reach out to you away from everyone else where no one would see if you happened to break.  Sounds were still muffled with the rushing and ringing in your ears, half in the present and half in your own head, but the gentle touch was enough to make you realize you were stiff from sitting in the saddle in such a still and rigid position for so long, and you needed to get off the horse.

Levi’s eyes were brighter blue in the setting sunlight, which only made it seem like they were gleaming with the depth of worry you could see enriching their color.  His grip on your hand was soft, cautious, but firm enough to try and bring you back to the present, to give enough of a pull to encourage you to let go of the reins that had been warped from how tightly you’d clenched them in your fists.

He was saying your name, too.  You didn’t know how long he’d been saying it, if this was the first time he’d tried or if he’d been trying to get your attention that whole trip and you just hadn’t heard him despite the fact he’d been riding right next to you.

His touch, that bright worry in his eyes, and how softly he was saying your name despite the hoarse cracking in his voice from speaking longer and more consistently than he was used to and then having to shout orders over the roar of battle during that retreat–all of it managed to shake you enough out of your stupor that you had more awareness of yourself, could feel the dust, bloody mud, gore, and sweat, the absolute filth that was still stuck to your skin, hair, and clothes, could feel the tenderness in your side where someone’s death throes had caused their leg to spasm with enough force they’d cracked–maybe broken–a rib that had mostly healed by now…

Once you relinquished the reins, Levi’s fingers slipped around your hand, keeping you from clenching it back into a fist and giving you something to hold to for stability, both in general and as you awkwardly dismounted Zephyr, movements stiff and admittedly painful as you worked your leg over the saddle and slid off, staggering a step while you got your feet back underneath you.  Levi’s hand didn’t leave yours the whole time, and as soon as you were steady on the ground, he was pulling you into his side in a much more open and caring gesture than you two had been able to get away with in Trost.

Hange swooped in to gather Zephyr’s reins to add the horse to the train of now three that were going to follow her back to the stables.  Even Hange’s presence and attitude was muted, nothing said by the other woman and her appearance so brief you barely had time to register she was there and catch her inspecting the warped leather of the reins before she was gone from your sight again.  Partially because she left that quickly to give you and Levi privacy, and partially because Levi had turned you away and was walking you inside, the one hand still gripping yours and pulled across his chest to keep you right at his side while the other hand had found its way to your shoulder to keep you steady and help guide you more directly, his arm resting across your back and giving you another sense of support in the process.

As you walked the halls, Levi was quiet for the most part, though every now and then he would puncture the silence with a murmured comment, barely putting volume in his strained voice and mostly depending on your more sensitive hearing to be able to clearly understand what he was saying.

“...Get baths drawn, we both look like hell.”

“Don’t worry about the reports, they can be done tomorrow.”

“Are you still with me?”

That last one he repeated a few times, and he only ever earned a brief dip of the chin in a mute answer that barely counted as a nod.  It was still enough of an answer for him–it was a response, which was an improvement from the entire ride back to headquarters, apparently.

You were still in and out of awareness of your surroundings, given the fact that he brought you to your quarters much faster than it felt like it should have been, and you didn’t exactly remember traversing some of the halls you needed to take to get to your quarters from your tea garden.  He kept his guiding hand on your shoulder but released the hand that was twined with his so he could let you both inside, trailing a half step behind with his arm outreached to keep that touch on your shoulder while he shut and locked the door behind both of you.

Once you were both behind the safety of a locked door, Levi tugged you over to your bed, bringing you to a stop at its foot and placing both hands on your shoulders, standing directly in front of you and trying to catch your glazed over eyes.

“Y/N.  Y/N, look at me.  Get out of your head, focus on me,” Levi ordered, though the concern in his eyes softened any hard edge to the commands.

There was an attempt to do as he asked, your movements sluggish as if you were underwater, feeling like you weren’t quite inside your own body, like you had one foot inside and one foot out.  You did look at him, but you weren’t entirely focused on him, weren’t entirely present.

In response, one of his hands released your shoulder to instead cup the side of your face, fingers threading into your hair.  The warmth of his hand against your skin suddenly made you realize how cold you were, how cool and clammy your skin felt.  The steadiness of his fingers threading in your hair–the first time he’d done it had been awkward and clumsy, and now it was so gentle, careful, and familiar–made you realize you were shaking.  When his thumb brushed against your cheek in response to seeing you coming back to yourself, you felt the slight pull of the crusted blood still on your face being scraped off in the process, reminding you that you were still covered in the blood of all those people–

Mid stroke, his thumb suddenly turned damp and warm, the water–tears–making the blood swipe away easier.

You hadn’t even realized you were crying–when had you started crying, how long had you been crying?

Your breath hitched, and part of you clawed desperately to go back to the numb, part of you cursed him for bringing you back to the present as the feelings started to mount into a boil in your throat and crash over you in massive waves.  Each crest of emotion seemed to slam into you with enough force to make you want to physically recoil, all the emotions you had been too deep into shock to feel all demanding to be felt at the same time now that you were coming back to yourself.

Finally, you could hear silence around his words, silence you had longed for on the wall, for nothing to break through and plague you against your will, just the silence, you, and Levi.  But now, that silence had turned suffocating and dark, filled with an absence that seemed like it was trying to crawl into your chest and expand until nothing remained.

That silence meant death, it meant loss, it meant a void where there had been hundreds of thousands of people drowned in boiling blood and tearing death, and you had longed for it on the wall.

You weren’t sure if the sound in your ears was the rushing of your blood or the heaving breaths you started to take as you gasped for air, your lungs constricted in thorns of pain, grief, and guilt until they felt too small to take in any air, that void finding a space in your chest where your lungs used to fill, starting to devour and press away the rest.

Maybe the sound in your ears wasn’t your breathing or your blood, maybe it was the screams you’d heard layered together and stabbing right passed your eardrums and into your brain like serrated blades.  All you could see was the blood spurting from limbs torn or bitten from people’s bodies, the horrified faces, the blood that had spewed from the mouth of the woman bitten at the waist, the screech cut short by the man who’d been torn apart by two Titans both ripping into him from different ends, eyes burning out and turning empty, bodies torn to shreds or crushed under Titan feet or falling Titan bodies, steam so thick it scalded your throat, eyes, and nose and burned your arms and back, hands that slipped free of your own because there was too much blood on your hands–

Your exhales were harsh sobs that tore at your throat, inhales choking on tears before you could get enough air in, and the slight trembling had turned to shudders.  You were burning from steam and boiling blood and fire and you needed it to stop, the screams to silence, the faces to disappear, this thing in your chest that used to be your heart twisting inside you so tightly it sent spasms through your body–

You couldn’t feel all this, it was scorching you to nothing, that absence sinking its teeth into the ashes of your insides and devouring the space of whatever used to be there, expanding in your chest, pushing down into your gut, up your throat–

“Y/N!”

You’d never heard him sound like that before.  Never, after everything that had already happened, had you heard that intense of fear come out of him, true terror.

Both of his hands had made it to your face while you’d been simultaneously spiraling and consumed, pulling your face up and tilting your head back from the position you’d collapsed into on the bed at some point without realizing.  For a second, it was like breaching the surface of the rapids of emotions you seemed to have been drowning in, a gasp of air–

There was a numbness spreading through you from that void, one that was pleasing in the face of the hell happening inside you, and you started to sink back into it, preferring the dark numbness of that abyss growing inside you at the center of it all to the rapids of emotions you were choking down instead of air.  You wanted that peace of the abyss that had scared you a few moments ago, not the agony of drowning in all the terror and bloodshed you’d seen today.  

The absence let you look at Levi with some semblance of calm collection, to wonder distantly if you’d ever seen him that pale when he wasn’t on the brink of death, if his eyes had ever seemed so wide.

“Don’t you dare!” Levi seethed, and you were taken aback by the agonized wrath in his tone, that it was directed at you, right now, in this moment where you would either drown or empty.  His gaze burned into yours, fingers gripping into your hair so tight you were tempted to think he was anchoring to you and about to be carried away by the rapids instead.

“Don’t you fucking shut out your humanity, don’t you fucking do that to yourself!”  Levi’s voice pierced through the depths like a rod of iron thrust out for you to grab onto, the only thing keeping you in place between the rapids trying to drown you and the void trying to devour you, his hands on your face keeping you just high enough in the rapids to catch a few gasps of air.  “You do that shit now, I may never get you back.  I’m not fucking losing you to yourself.”

Shut off your humanity?  Is that what he thought you were doing?  You didn’t know how.

Though, if that’s what this void was, if it was this calm and peaceful, if you felt a still nothingness, that was far more preferable to the boiling and burning that had been razing every piece of you from the inside out.  Maybe you’d been too harsh on the vampires that had shut it all out, who gave themselves that internal peace and quiet.

“You said it yourself, it would take something just as bad to snap you out of it, that it would be worse when you did.  You said you didn’t want to lose your humanity.  Don’t fucking do it, don’t you fucking do it!”

Levi had stepped closer, now standing inside your bubble, and you couldn’t tell if the grip he had in your hair and on your cheek and jaw was a caress or a desperate clutch.  One of your hands was gripping his wrist, and some part of you distantly recognized you might be gripping enough to cause harm, maybe–hopefully–just a bruise, but Levi was resisting, staying locked onto you and entirely ignoring the grip that was subconsciously trying to peel him away.

“You need to let yourself feel it.  You have to,” he emphasized when he saw you internally recoil from his request for you to keep drowning instead of shutting out the pain.  Your cheeks had started to turn cold, but now you could feel warm tears slipping free again, felt the rapids getting deeper and stronger as the void started to shrink, no longer yawning endlessly below you.  You could see it in his eyes that he saw it, too, saw the shifting in your demeanor again and knew he was getting through.

“It’s shit, and it’s hell.  You’ll survive it–you can,” he asserted when he saw the doubt in your eyes.

You were choking on the tears again, shaking as the thorns of feelings started to creep back into your chest–you swore that it happened faster, that the barbed torment filled the spaces inside far more rapidly.  Seeing you starting to come back to yourself, Levi’s harsher tone softened, though there was still an angry sharpness to some of his words, chastising you at the same time he clung to you.

“You said it yourself, it’s worse, it’s not worth it to shut it out.  Don’t you do that to yourself, don’t you take yourself away from me, not like that,” Levi admonished, a traitorous shake in his voice giving away how much of his words were fear talking and not real anger.

His words cut right through, breaking past any residual attempts to sink into the depths instead and causing your heart to bleed into the rapids, flooding them with the emotions that had been drowning you all over again, and then more as other, older emotions you’d been suppressing and bottling up bled into the rapids with the events of the day.

As you cracked, as the sobs broke free at last, you took your few moments of pained lucidity to reach for him, sliding under his arms and up his back so your hands could cling desperately to his shoulders.  Your face buried into his chest as he quickly took the seat beside you, which allowed you to pull him closer, ignoring the fact that your tears wet the blood on his clothes and smeared more of it across your face, ignoring the blood and grime in favor of holding desperately to him as you tried not to drown in the waves of pain and haunting imagery and sounds ringing in your ears.  He wrapped his arms around you as well, head resting atop your own, allowing you to hide and disappear inside his embrace while you tried to survive the turmoil inside you.

You didn’t mention the fact you could feel your hair growing damp, the wet on your cheek or the warm drops onto your shoulder, or how you could feel him trembling beneath you, didn’t mention that you could hear the hitches in his breath, the clearing of his throat that was just high enough in pitch to let you know he was trying to clear the tightness in his throat.  You didn’t think you had the air to address it even if you tried–every breath was spent on the emotions inside you whether it was in sobs and wails or desperately trying to gasp air before you passed out from the lack thereof.

But you knew that he took the moment to feel his own grief and pain as well, that he listened to his own advice and let himself feel it now while you did the same beside him so that it wouldn’t consume him, either.

Next Chapter---->

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[mindless-existence1]

Eren Yeager x Reader

Summery:A creepy guy hits on you at a bar and Eren gets into a bar fight to protect you so you take him back to your place to bandage him up.

Authors note: Gender neutral but reader gets treated like female at the bar thats about it. The ending isn't exactly how I wanted it but whatever. Full fluff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A whole night of partying was what the scouts needed after a successful mission. No casualties just tired soldiers in need for a night of fun.

You and your fellow comrades from the 104th were hanging out together at some bar in town. All of you had been getting hammered, some more than others.

Sasha, Connie, and Jean were drinking like there was no tomorrow. Mikasa and Armin had a bit more restraint but in the end you and Eren were the most sober.

You didnt mind, someone had to be the sober one and you knew Captian Levi wasnt going to let you guys off the hook just because you were partying. But thats something you can rub into your hung over friends later.

Before this bar Eren had been mostly sober along with you but you've noticed hes started downing more and more drinks. "Hey Eren? You good?" You ask, your friends around you laughing at something that probobly wasnt even a joke to begin with.

"Yeah why wouldnt I be?" He responds faking a calm resolve. This makes you chuckle. "Well how you said that doesnt really help your case-"

Before you could finish a man you had seen sitting across the bar walked over to you. "Hey baby, how 'bout I buy you a drink?" The drunk man reaches his hand around your waist.

Immediately you push his grabby hand away from you, "No actually im good, already got a drink." Thinking that was the end of the interaction you go back to turn towards Eren.

"Oh dont be like that sweetheart im trying to be nice!" You could smell the alcohol that reeked from his body. "Dude i said no now please leave me alone."

You could see the moment his body langue changed, the perv became angry and moved faster to grab you. "You little bi-" The man's words were cut short by....Eren?

In a split second Eren went from beside you to infront of you punching the creeps face. You stumbled back in suprise but Eren stood his ground, his frame larger than yours keeping you almost protected?

"What the fuck? What's your problem man? This your bitch or something?" The man shouted from the ground, slowly trying to pick himself up but holding his most likely broken nose.

He couldn't get up though because Eren leg came swinging upwards and kicking the man in his side, hard. "Dont you ever call her that you asshole. You're lucky im not allowed to harm civilians, I think Captain Levi would make an exception though."

With that the perv stood up holding his side but lifting his hands to fight. "You want to fight huh asshole? Think you're tough shit just cuz you're a scout? Please." The man laughed to himself.

After that it was a full fledged fight, you couldn't help but feel ever so slightly responsible. When Eren and the creep got separated and kicked out your party finally decided it was time to go.

You, being the only sober one there, took Eren with you and called for another scout to pick up your friends.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The whole walk home Eren was silent, even now sitting on your bed he was quiet. You were tending to the few wounds he had gotten. One to the face, chest, and his knuckles. Eren had been the clear winner of the fight

"You going to tell me why you went and did all that?" You finally ask breaking the silence. You had already gotten his chest now working on his knuckles, saving the face for last since itd be the most awkward.

"He was being an asshole so I stopped him." His dry answer made you chuckle, "yeah man I got that, but really. Why?" Your tone got more serious.

You had enough smarts to know it was about you but you couldn't tell why. He thought for a moment. "I didn't like how he was trying to grab you. And not taking no for and answer. And then he called you those names."

Anger dripped from his words, like he was still in the bar. "So you did all that for me?" You ask the tipsy man infront of you.

"Wasn't it obvious?" Eren look at you confused. "Just was wondering why you do all of that for me. Seems a little excessive dont you think?"

You finished with his knuckles and began to move up to his face for tending to. His jaw was beginning to get a bruise.

"Y/n. You're very," he thought "improtant to me. I didnt like how that guy was all over you."

When your eyes drifted to his you could see he was already staring at you intently. There was smth in them you couldn't quite place. "And then he called you that and it just pissed me off." Eren continued.

Your gentke hands cupped his face so he was looking up at you from where you stood. You looked into eachothers eyes for a moment before you spoke. "It was dangerous, and kinda stupid, and I can take care of myself. But thank you Eren."

That made the permanent scoul he was wearing upturn into a smile. "I'll always be here to protect you y/n."

[mayajadewrites]

attitude problem – levi ackerman

pairing: captain levi x fem scout reader

synopsis: while being a part of the scout regiment, you've gotten spoken to numerous times about your attitude towards other scouts and even leaders. captain levi ackerman has had enough.

authors note: this is my first time writing a one-shot so please be kind :)

NSFW.

"Mikasa, do you ever shut the fuck up about Eren?" You roll your eyes as you finish your dinner. "I feel like I know every single thing about him and I barely even know the man."

"Just because you're alone doesn't mean we all have to be." Mikasa retorted, glancing at Eren. "Right, Eren?"

"Smart men stay quiet." You get up from your seat and walk to the trash can to clean off your plate of food.

"I guess I'm a dumbass then." You turned around to see Captain Levi standing behind you with his arms across his chest.

"If the shoe fits." You shrug your shoulders and walk the opposite direction of Captian Levi.

Unlike everyone else, you're not afraid of the Captain. Hell, you're barely afraid of titans. Nothing truly scares you and your personality radiates that.

You fix your cropped jacket as you walk back to your room.

Captain Levi calls your name before you can open your door.

"Come to my office. And that's an order, not a question."

Unfortunately, you cannot ignore a Captain's orders. You can try your best to bend the orders to make it worth your while, but to simply ignore is not what a scout does.

You enter Captain Levi's office and notice how pristine everything is. There is not a speck of dust on any tables, nor is anything out of place. Even the piles of papers look like they're placed in a specific order. His outfit looked like it was just cleaned and steamed - his white dress shirt without any wrinkles, his pants tailored perfectly.

Captain Levin shut his door, striding to his chair. He leaned back in his chair, sipping his tea with his hand above the top of the cup. "Sit."

You comply, sitting in the chair in front of his desk.

"I've gotten several complaints about your attitude lately." Levi's half lidded eyes looked at you. "Every day actually."

"Did you want me to say sorry?" Your eyes stayed on his, raising an eyebrow.

"You're a vision fighting titans, but socializing is not your forté."

"I could say the same about you."

This must've struck a nerve in Captain Levi since he stood up from his chair, glaring at you with his steel shaded eyes.

He stood up from his chair and slowly made his way over to you, eventually pressing his hands on the armrests of your chair. Captain Levi inched his face closer to yours to the point where you could feel his breath. "What are we gonna do about that mouth of yours?"

Your breath hitched as Captain Levi analyzed your face. He studied every detail of your skin as if it was the last thing he would ever look at.

"Captain." You whisper, your eyes meeting his. "Have you ever been this close to a woman?" A smirk formed on your lips.

Captain Levi pulled your body up to him by your shirt, pressing his lips to your ear. "Oh brat, you have no idea." You felt his teeth sink into your ear, an unexpected moan leaving your lips.

Captain Levi pressed his hands to your waist and brought you on top of his desk so you were above him. Still unsure on what you should do, you played quiet.

"Don't act all shy now." The Captain's voice almost always sounded seductive, but right now it felt especially so. The warmth from your core felt like it was going to burn a hole in your stomach. "Tell me what you want."

"I want to fuck you on your desk."

"Correction, I'll be fucking you." Captain Levi pressed his plump lips to yours, feeding your hunger for him. His tongue was impatient, pushing through his lips into your mouth. His hands were placed on your hips, squeezing them gently every now and then.

You can't lie, you've always thought Captain Levi was hot as fuck. Who didn't. But you never thought he would ever want to kiss you, let alone fuck you.

"I never realized you could be quiet for more than 2 minutes." Captain Levi whispered against your lips, snaking his hands up your shirt to your tits. "So these are why you're always in trouble for dress code. Your buttons are about to burst open." He took your nipple between his thumb and pointer finger, pinching it gently.

"Captain," You moan, leaning your head back. Captain Levi began massaging your tits gently, watching your facial expression turn into pure arousal.

"Lay down." Captain Levi ordered, stripping himself from his shirt, slowly undoing his lower half. You could hear his belt hit the floor, which made you even more aroused. "I'm going to fuck you on my desk, do you hear me?"

"Yes, Captain." You lay down on the wooden desk, the cold surface creating goosebumps on your skin.

"Levi." He said, bringing his fingers to your pussy. "Look how wet your pretty little pussy is for me already." One finger slipped in, then two. Levi pumped his fingers into your pussy, curling them when he felt it was deep enough.

"Captain - God, Levi." You moan, reaching your hands out to grab something, anything.

Levi pulled his fingers out of you and pulled his underwear off, kicking them to the side with his ankle. You looked up at the size of his cock, and holy shit, it looked perfect. You could see pre-cum drip from his tip and you were mentally begging for him to slam himself inside of you.

"You want this?" Levi said as he put his arms over you on the desk.

"Yes." You moan again, barely holding onto control.

"Yes what?" Levi inched closer to your face.

"Yes please." You whimper as he guided his cock into your pussy, feeling your walls stretch to the size of him. Levi's eyes rolled to the back of his head as he pressed into you, his strokes long and gentle.

You didn't expect Levi to be gentle while he was fucking you, but he was. His hands caressed your face as he pulled in and out of you, planting kisses on your face and neck.

Levis lips found the sensitive spot on your neck where he began biting and sucking, leaving a hickey.

"Levi, fuck." You moan breathlessly, wrapping your arms around his neck. "You feel so good."

"I'm the only one that can handle this pussy filled with attitude." His pace quickened, kissing your lips gently. "Remember that."

You felt your walls pulsate around his cock, chasing your high. "Levi, I'm gonna cum."

"By all means." Levi thrusted inside you faster, helping you attain that high that you've been dreaming of. The world shattered and it was just you and Levi. Levi's pace was quick and uneven now and you knew he was about to reach his euphoria.

He pulled out quickly and released on your stomach as he breathed heavily. Once he came down from his high, he grabbed a towel from his drawer and cleaned you off before himself. Your legs were shaking and your pussy was still dripping with arousal.

"Remember that the next time you mouth off."

[dsireland86]

I found Noah in Anime form!!! I believe @thefallennightmare and @thescarlettvvitch mentioned this in J.P. phase 3, but for those who didn't catch it..... here ya go :)

Captian Levi from ATTACK ON TITAN. He's so hot! I've had a crush on him for a while before the ladies ever mentioned it in their story. But when they did.... let me tell you..... I was geeking out 🤣 I'm so happy someone else thought the same thing about Noah's new look.

I can't help but think you two were to something when you added those little eggs