#cantankerousAxolotl

[broadway-stuck]

after a hard year of work we give you this, featuring doc scratch + all the trolls. happy holidays, remember to watch out for meteors!

lyrics by candyGroove

lyrics under the cut!

(Verse 1)

[DOC SCRATCH] The first day of Twelfth Perigee, I killed th-

[TEREZI] Oh, what's this? A scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 2)

[DOC SCRATCH] ...Hmm. On the second day of Twelfth Perigee, I took the lives of ev--

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 3)

[DOC SCRATCH] On the third day of Twelfth Perigee, I took the lives of ever--

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz and

[TEREZI] A scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 4)

[DOC SCRATCH] As I was trying to say, I took the lives of everyone--

[FEFERI] Four cuttlefish

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz and--

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 5)

[DOC SCRATCH] I will not join in this nonsense. You'll just have to trust--

[KARKAT] Five fuckasses!

[FEFERI, giggling] Four cuttlefish

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz and

[TEREZI] A scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 6)

[DOC SCRATCH] Will you STOP interrupting me? All I'm trying to do is--

[KANAYA] Six innocuous lipsticks

[KARKAT] Five fuckasses!

[FEFERI] Four cuttlefish

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 7)

[DOC SCRATCH] Fine. If this is the fate I am chained to, then I will perform.

[TAVROS] Seven Fiduspawn cards

[KANAYA] Six innocuous lipsticks

[KARKAT] Five fuckasses!

[FEFERI] Four cuttlefish

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 8)

[DOC SCRATCH] On the eighth day of Twelfth Perigee, their matesprits gave

[VRISKA] Eight spiders spinning

[TAVROS] Seven Fiduspawn cards

[KANAYA] Six innocuous lipsticks

[KARKAT] Five fuckasses!

[FEFERI] Four cuttlefish

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 9)

[DOC SCRATCH] On the ninth day of Twelfth Perigee, their matesprits gave

[GAMZEE] Nine cans of faygo

[VRISKA] Eight spiders spinning

[TAVROS] Seven Fiduspawn cards

[KANAYA] Six innocuous lipsticks

[KARKAT] Five fuckasses!

[FEFERI] Four cuttlefish

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 10)

[DOC SCRATCH] On the tenth day of Twelfth Perigee, their matesprits gave...

[ERIDAN] Ten breakup letters

[GAMZEE] Nine cans of faygo

[VRISKA] Eight spiders spinning

[TAVROS] Seven Fiduspawn cards

[KANAYA] Six innocuous lipsticks

[KARKAT] Five fuckasses!

[FEFERI] Four cuttlefish

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 11)

[DOC SCRATCH] On the eleventh day of Twelfth Perigee, their matesprits gave

[ARADIA] Eleven frogs a-leaping

[ERIDAN] Ten breakup letters

[GAMZEE] Nine cans of faygo

[VRISKA] Eight spiders spinning

[TAVROS] Seven Fiduspawn cards

[KANAYA] Six revving chainsaws

[KARKAT] Five fuckasses!

[FEFERI, confused] Oh-- Wait, Chainsaws? Four... cuttlefish?

[NEPETA] Three sharp claws

[SOLLUX] Two bees that buzz

[TEREZI] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

(Verse 12)

[DOC SCRATCH] And on the twelfth day of Twelfth Perigee, I KILLED THEM ALL! With...

[EQUIUS] Twelve rippling hoofbeasts

[ARADIA] Eleven robot bodies

[ERIDAN] Ten piles with CAPTOR!

[GAMZEE] Nine hours with the puppet

[VRISKA] Eight stabs in the back

[TAVROS] Seven feet off a ledge

[KANAYA] Six revving chainsaws

[KARKAT] Five ominous honks

[FEFERI, crying] Four culled friends

[NEPETA] Three deep cuts

[SOLLUX] Two doomed mortal loves

[ALL] And a scalemate hanging from the tree!

[broadwayeridan]

baby it's cold outside

not that you need an excuse to stay wwith me fef, but it is cold outside so i wwould rather you stick around

[broadway-sollux]

here iit ii2 the 2ong youve all been waitiing for.

congratulatiion2 we diid iit. 

we cliimbed that mountain and diid a 2iick piirouette off the handle of my priide.

lyriic2 beelow the cut. cover art by candyGroove​.

Sollux - Aradia - Feferi - E̲r̲i̲d̲a̲n̲

---

iif ii wa2 your mate2priit iid never let you go we dont need no 2pace 2hiit two make that body glow loo2en up your bra2 girl2 and get up on the flow boondollar2 iin my claw2 that iid really liike two blow

2wag, 2wag, 2wag on you

headcanon bout my diick? lemme tell you that iit2 true do a double take, yeah, baby ii got two that mean2 one of them for FF and one of them for you

(2wag)

id like t0 be everything y0u want

)(-EY SOL! Let me talk to you!

iif ii wa2 your mate2priit, iid never let you go yeah iid get the biitche2, hiighe2t blood two low cyberiing on trollian, puttiing on a 2how iif ii wa2 your mate2prit, iid never let you go

iid never let you go

tell me bout your feeling2 2itting on a pile 2oon iill get you 2quealing and make iit worth your whiile yeah, ii dont mean to boa2t but feferii liike2 the view AA ha2 been a gho2t once but now 2hell be my boo

m̲a̲t̲e̲s̲p̲r̲i̲t̲, m̲a̲t̲e̲s̲p̲r̲i̲t̲! g̲o̲d̲ i̲ w̲w̲a̲n̲t̲ a̲ m̲a̲t̲e̲s̲p̲r̲i̲t̲!

eriidan, what the fuck are you doiing here?

i̲ j̲u̲s̲t̲ n̲e̲e̲d̲ t̲o̲ b̲e̲ L̲O̲V̲V̲E̲D̲

you piiece of 2hiit get out of my 2ong!

y̲o̲u̲ s̲a̲i̲d̲ t̲h̲o̲n̲g̲

(2waggiie)

id like t0 be everything y0u want

)(-EY SOL! Let me talk to you!

iif ii wa2 your mate2priit, iid never let you go yeah iid get the biitche2, hiighe2t blood two low cyberiing on trollian, puttiing on a 2how iif ii wa2 your mate2prit, iid never let you go

iid never let you go

y0u kn0w y0ure my w0rld y0u g0t all i need s0l spend a week 0n the sun, ill be calling y0u my matesprit

If I was your girl, I'd never leave you, Sol! I just want to LOV-E and treat you RIGHT!

iif ii wa2 your mate2priit, iid never let you go yeah iid get the biitche2, hiighe2t blood two low (highest bl00d t0 l0w) cyberiing on trollian, puttiing on a 2how iif ii wa2 your mate2prit, iid never let you go iid never let you go

na na na na na na na na na

iif ii wa2 your mate2prit

[broadway-feferi]

You and your stupid fis)(y face! You're KNOT)(ING wit)(out me! -Even to t)(e point t)(at I wrote t)(is out myss)(ellf wit)( t)(e lyrics under t)(e cut!

Feferi

Eridan

Both

You are some mildew,

You just don't think well

It's my Sgrub Session,

You can go straight to Hell!

Is your mouth lonely

With one foot in there

Your thinkpan only

Holds thoughts I put in there

Just what you are I'll spell out

You are a phantom pain

One speck of lint that fell out

The last time that I picked my fame

You are so jealous

Of my track record

Feferi tell us

Your feeble hack record

Your weak knees brand you

Soft and unstable

One small death and you

Fold like a card table

You drool at my pure science

You're just starting when I'm done

You craft your own destruction

Your trident’s no match for my gun

You're nothing without me

A no-one who'd go undefined

You wouldn't exist

You'd never be missed

I tell you you're out of your mind

A show off, a blowhard

You're equal parts hot air and gall

And no one would doubt me

Without me you're nothing at all

You are so thick, you

Eat, breathe, sleep fiction

I'm your meal ticket

Knee-deep in cheap fiction

You’re still flushed pale

Just as it’s meant for us

I call each shot

I’m your quadrant dictator

You gloating ignoramus!

You haven't any shame...

Hey, I'm a lachnolaimus

And most people don’t know your claims

You're nothing without me

Without me you'd just disappear

Right into thin air

And no one would care

Or notice you ever were here

A puppet, an upstart

A loser who's destined to fall

I'm everything you always wanted to be

Let's deal with the issue:

You wish you were me

You're nothing without me

Without me you're nothing

At all!

[broadwayeridan]

i'm sorry for evverythin i'vve done to hurt you. maybe wwe can havve a fresh start?

:33< it's purretty hard to to get in close with someone who's hurt you

:33< but sincere apawlogies are also very hard, so you can work on it together that way

[Song: First Date, Last Night from Dogfight | Lyrics unchanged and cover art under cut]

[Nepeta]

Street lamp, dim glow

A light to blanket night like summer snow

Well, let it pour

Just cover up whatever came before

[Eridan]

Sea breeze, whips through

And makes you do some shit you'd never do

Talkin' queer, why the hell are you still here?

[Both]

And we go

Bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum bum

Don't know why

I decided to come

Don't know why I decided to come

[Nepeta]

Meet me halfway

A touch and go of don't know what to say

Do we talk?

[Eridan]

*cough*

[Nepeta]

What?

[Eridan]

Huh?

[Nepeta]

Don't expect too much

Just walk

[Eridan]

Blank slate, blank stare

Yeah you made her cry

Why do you care?

What took hold?

Look at her, she looks so... cold

[Both]

And we go

Bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum bum

Don't know why

I decided to come

Don't know why I decided to come

[Nepeta]

Twisting lemons into lemonade

You'd be sleeping

([Eridan] You'd be drunk)

[Both]

If you had stayed

And you might miss

Any good that could come

After this

[Nepeta]

First date

[Eridan]

Last night

[Both]

Not quite what you pictured, but alright

[Eridan]

So take her out

[Nepeta]

Give him a shot

[Both]

'Cause people can surprise you...

Or not

Bum bum

And we go

Bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum bum

Bum bum bum bum bum

[broadwayeridan]

unsaid feferi

fef, i wwill alwways regret ruinin wwhat wwe had together. i hope you can forgivve me

[broadwayeridan]

heartbreak

i'vve been gone for a wwhile, but I'm back now. had to do some thinkin on a whole lot of things.

[broadwayeridan]

The Reason

fef i promise i wwill do better, i am sorry

[broadway-feferi]

Maybe @broadwayeridan can sing after all… T)(at doesn't excuse )(is messages t)(oug)(!

T)(ank you to @saccharinesinger for t)(e fintastic lyrics, t)(ey're under t)(e cut!

F: I )(ardly sink I’m fit to be Ruler of our planet, see I just don’t like the rules t)(at we’ve set up

E: feferi wwhat are you talkin about theyre all filth ‘neath you an me bein empressll be a breeze wwhich rather suits the royal bloods who swwim

F: T)(e ones w)(o swim, t)(e ones w)(o swim, it’s me and )(im O)( my COD!

F: It’s toug)( to be up top

E: wwatch the loww bloods dyin off

F: Be feared and stuff w)(en reelly you’re not bad!

E: be an object of devotion

F: Be t)(e —Empress of all

E: i ts great to live in the ocean wwhere you knoww youre better off

F: But w)(y must I be sovereign

E: Cuz your bloods beauty wworth marvvelin

B: If t)(ey say wwere at the top t)(ats where wwell stay

F: Boat what if we don’t comply wit)( t)(ese dumb traditions

E: i can see the planet fall to anarchy

F: Yes…Wait, W)(AT?

E: so be our boss it wwill be great

F: —Eridan

E: Alternia on a plate lowwbloods feelins wwont be your concern

F: Not my concern? Not my concern, the low blood‘s feelings? —ERIDAN!

F: It’s toug)( to be up top

E: but once you see youre better off count your blessins, keep bein swweet, thats my advvice

F: Be a symbol of t)(e vicious

E: be an empress be a queen

F: Condemn to deat)(, allow t)(e atrocious As the low bloods start to s eet)(e

E: dont be silly youll be lauded youll be praised alwways applauded

F: I’m not so s)(ore…

E: just take your place as empress feferi you will see!

[broadwayeridan]

wworks in progress

i got some songs in the wworks for you landdwwellers, this is the list:

heather by conan gray (rewwriting)

perfume by lovejoy (rewwriting)

shit by bo burnham (rewwriting)

ovver for you by morgan evans (rewwriting)

wwords fail from dear evvan hansen (rewwriting)

kiss wwith a fist by florence + the machine (rewwriting)

arabian nights from the livve action aladdin (rewwriting)

wwellerman by the longest johns (recording)

i see red by evverybody lovves an outlaw (recording)

understand by christian leave (recording)

prince ali from the live action aladdin (recording)

whistle by flo rida (recording)

no you girls by franz ferdinand (recording)

finished

[S] Eridan ====> Beg For Forgivveness

Lovve Me Dead

It's Ovver Isn't It

Before the next Teardrop Falls

Flushed Culture

Take Me to Church

Mituna

Your Neww Matesprit

The Reason

Diamonds

Heartbreak

Unsaid Feferi

featured in

It's Tough to be On Top wwith Broadwway Feferi

You're Nothing Wwithout Me wwith Broadwway Feferi

A Little Piece of Heavven

First Date Last Night wwith Broadwway Nepeta

The Twwelve Trolls of Twwelfth Perigee

Baby It's Cold Outside wwith Broadwway Feferi

[broadwayeridan]

hello eridan, can you please parody no you girls by franz ferdinand?

i wwill add it to the queue for you anon, i wwill try to have it done soon

[broadwayeridan]

Eridan ===> Introduce Yourself

i'm cantankerousAxolotl, but you can call me broadwway eridan. my hobbies include: singin, apparently. also, magic isn't real.

these are my tags: ca sings: my songs landdwweller asks: my askbox ca text: my text posts reglub: my reblogs

[broadway-jane]

This came together so well! I'm so proud of you all!

Happy birthday, CrockerBerts, and happy 4/13 to the rest! Thank you for another great Homestuck day! For this wondrous occasion, we bring you a lesser known gem from Horizonanadyomene on YouTube (original: Here)

As well, thanks to our talented caballineToxophallic for providing the cover art and the amazing auricTruism for mixing this so beautifully!

The lyrics as they were distributed below the cut:

[ROSE] All these familiar faces even in a world that is new it still feels like i know you

[KANAYA] Through seldom-traveled places we began a story with every step and rewrote it with every breath

You know that we

[EQUIUS] We tried to prove we have the best intentions we tried to understand through education

[SOLLUX] We tried to live in our imaginations some things don't back down

[DOC SCRATCH] The water's rising a green horizon

[CALLIOPE] Maybe you and i will be reborn, too

[CALIBORN] Well it's been ages a thousand pages imposed on one another but i still remember you

[CALLIOPE] We are wandering stars in sweet harmony

[DOC SCRATCH] We're all part of a symphony of a changing universe

[ARADIA] Us young adventurers

[JADE] One life to show us what you're made of just drop the fear, jump a tier, find the shade of your soul all reflected around you yes, you will know when you've finally found you

[DIRK] Each life we might have lived through every part of us still exists; every fragment is endless

[JANE] This world we've walked on into even when it feels overwhelming, it's just the beginning

[VRISKA] The water's rising a new horizon maybe you and i will be reborn, too

[ROXY] Well it's been ages a thousand stages imposed on one another but i still remember you

[ERIDAN] We are wandering stars in sweet harmony we're all part of a symphony of a changing universe

[JOHN] From a thousand different worlds on another kind of earth us young adventurers

[broadwayeridan]

how about i cant decide? by scissor sisters

actually, i wwas already plannin on covverin that song. if all goes wwell i wwill start wwork on it soon

[broadwayeridan]

I’ve been waiting for your appearance to make a request: It’s Over Isn’t It from Steven Universe

wwaiting for me? if i must i guess i can fulfill the request. i'll be wworking on the song and hopefully it wwill be ready for you soon

[broadway-stuck]

THE BROADWAYSTUCKS

- Broadway John (SONGS)

- Broadway Jade (SONGS)

- Broadway Dave (SONGS)

- Broadway Rose (SONGS)

- Broadway Jane (SONGS)

- Broadway Jake (SONGS)

- Broadway Roxy (SONGS)

- Broadway Dirk (SONGS)

- Broadway Aradia (SONGS)

- Broadway Tavros (SONGS)

- Broadway Sollux (SONGS)

- Broadway Karkat (SONGS)

- Broadway Nepeta (SONGS)

- Broadway Kanaya (SONGS)

- Broadway Terezi (SONGS)

- Broadway Vriska (SONGS)

- Broadway Equius (SONGS)

- Broadway Gamzee (SONGS)

- Broadway Eridan (SONGS)

- Broadway Feferi (SONGS)

- Broadway Doc Scratch (SONGS)

- Broadway Calliope (SONGS)

- Broadway Caliborn (SONGS)

CAST

John - eccentricBaldachin

Jade - gigglingGummybear

Dave - thaknsGiging

Rose - trillingTracheotomy

Jane - ghostlyGrimalkin

Jake - galavantingTreachery

Roxy - trickyGremlin

Dirk - transientThinker

Aradia - anticipatedAffliction

Tavros - apprehensiveTrainer

Sollux - twofoldAnnihalition

Karkat - crystallineGraves

Nepeta - angelicCompatriot

Kanaya - glamourAficionado

Terezi - gnathonicCabaret

Vriska - alacritousGrifter

Gamzee -

Equius - caballineToxophallic

Eridan - cantankerousAxolotl

Feferi - crepuscularCutie

Calliope - upbeatUlulation

Caliborn -

Doc Scratch - Doc Scratch

CREW

candyGroove - Archivist and Lyricist

auricTruism - Mixer and lyricist

tenaciousTachygraph - Lyricist

greyscaleAngel - Lyricist

gallantArrogance - Lyricist

ghostlyGrimalkin - Artist

claggyCaprini - Mixer

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