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leqonsluv3r · 16 days ago

Note

hiii!! May i ask for a first date with Leon with a fem reader? Thanks!

bed chem

—re!4 leon kennedy x fem!reader

—a oneshot (request)

warnings: MDNI, 18+, some swearing, readers ex being a dick, leon charming it up on the first date, sweet but passionate seggsy time bc i say so, unprotected pnv, nicknames; baby, sweet girl, honey, heavy making out on the first date (it happens), reader being a horny mess over leon (relatable honestly), and a bunch of other shit.

“she had been weighing the pros and cons of doing this for the past three days. it was the nerves of getting back out there after being in a shitty relationship, that were getting to her. she wanted to move on from that. but still…was this the best idea? she couldn’t just forget about her ex? right? she needed to but something — maybe anxiety — was clawing at her guts. she sat in the restaurant again that they were supposed to meet at, a blind date of all things. she was never this…bold. never this much of a risk taker. but she needed this, she cant remember the last time she had — “is this seat taken?” she is snapped out of her thoughts as she looks up and sees the most handsome man she’s probably ever laid eyes on. her ex boyfriend didn’t even compare by a long shot. she looked at him like a gaped fish, “uhm…no…it’s not…” she blubbers out. she was in for it.”

— or reader meets leon on a blind date and thinks maybe her ex breaking up with her wasn’t such a bad thing

masterlist taglist prompt game

an: i’m sorry this took me so long to get up. hope this is what you had in mind, anon.🩷🩷

she didn’t think this was a good idea.

not in the slightest, she had been single for only three months. she wasn’t waiting to long right? no, she wasn’t. she could do this.

even if her gut was screaming at her to do something differently, to run out of this restaurant and away from her blind date that was setup.

she wanted to run.

she stared at her wineglass of water, taking a small sip of it. she sighs softly, looking at her phone. he was five minutes late. did she get stood up? did he see her then turn around and leave? she swallowed and tried to not jump to conclusions. that probably wasn’t the case.

she hated that she was back to square one, if only her ex hadn’t dumped her right before christmas. she felt like she was stuck, having dated her ex for two years, she felt so out of the game with flirting. she was just going on this date to humor her friends, they said she was moping, said she needed to stop eating ice cream in her sweats on friday nights.

she had to agree, she needed to start going on dates…but blind ones? set up by her friends? not the smartest idea.

but they had told her to trust them. so she was, even though she felt like her heart was beating out of her chest.

she couldn’t do this, she was going to get up and leave, go right back to her apartment and —

“is this seat taken?” she hears a voice drawl from behind her shoulder. she swallowed, her insides melting like jello just at the four simple words this man had uttered. she tries to find words as he quickly rounds the table and sits down opposite from her. it’s like her eyes and brain are working faster then her mouth is, taking him all in. he was so beautiful, so…god, she didn’t even have a word for what he was.

she finally found some words and opened her mouth, “uhh, your…uhh…” she takes a deep breath and tries again, “your my blind date?” she finds herself saying. it came out more quiet and feeble then she would’ve liked but in this mans presence she’s lucky she wasn’t a puddle on the floor already.

he nods with a small subtle quirk of his lips, “leon kennedy.” he says as he grabs the menu, his eyes scanning over her for a quick second then averting to the specials on the sheet in front of him. she ducked her head down to look at her own menu, trying to seem focused on it when in hindsight, she wanted to ask where the cameras were. she was obviously being pranked. right?

she looks up from her menu and chances a look at leon again, she smiles softly and nervously when he catches her stare. he puts his menu down slowly against the table and looks at her. “are you going to tell me your name?” he says with a small teasing brow raise. she chuckles softly, averting her eyes and then looking back at him before saying her name softly. he hums in acknowledgment, his lips quirking up again. “cute name.”

jesus, fuck the dinner. she could just jump his bones right now.

the waiter doesn’t giver her a chance though and comes by to take their orders for drinks and appetizers. leon looks back at her, his blue eyes burning deeply into her soul as if trying to read her from across the table. “so why are you not on the dating apps?” is the first question he asks her. she blinks at him dumbly for a moment, trying to process his question. “uhm…i just got out of a relationship in december. i didn’t really feel like joining when all guys on there are all looking for the same thing.” she manages to say with a surprisingly confident tone.

he nods slowly as if understanding, “i get it.’ he says as he sips on his own glass of water. “so your not like a commitment-phobe or anything?” he says as he looks at her, folding his hands on the table. she chuckles and shakes her head, her eyes briefly darting down to his hands on the table and then back up to him. “no, i’m the opposite. me and my ex were together for two years.”

he shakes his head, “must’ve been an idiot to let someone as beautiful as you go.”

she feels her cheeks heat up a little under the dim lighting of the restaurant, “he just…wasn’t feeling it anymore.” she says with a small nervous smile, “it happens.” he scoffs and his blue eyes darken for a second. “if he was really for you, sweetheart, trust me. he wouldn’t just stop feeling it.” he says with a small grimace. almost looking in pain for her, like he hated what he was hearing.

“why are you on a blind date then?” she says softly to him, trying to desperately change the subject. he sighs and leans back in his chair a little, looking at her, “i’m sick of bouncing around.” he says as he looks at her, his tone less teasing and more serious. “going from girl to girl…its not what i want. im not happy that way.” he says with a small glance at her.

she nods slowly in understanding as he talked, acknowledging his words. the waiter came and sat their drinks down in front of them, putting a brief pause on the conversation. his drink — a whiskey on the rocks, hers — a simple dr pepper. he notices the lack of alcohol but decides to wait until the waiter is done taking their orders. once, the waiter walks away, he nods towards her soda, “a dr pepper? no alcohol?” he says with another raise of his eyebrow.

“i doin’t like drinking on the first date.” she says as she looks at him then his drink, “you obviously don’t mind that.” her tone and edge of sarcasm as she sips on her drink pepper again. he chuckles lowly and shakes his head, his ash blonde hair moving with him, “giving me shit now for my drink choice?”

“yeah, you gave me shit for mine. don’t think i didn’t notice.” she says as she sits back a little in her own seat across from him, crossing her legs beneath the table.

they continue talking for hours, eating their food and sipping on their drinks as they talk. this was going better then she had planned, learning more about leon then she intended. he didn’t seem like the talkative type but when they started discussing jobs, past pets, family, really anything. he seemed to open up and tell her pretty much whatever she wanted to know.

after they finished eating, she went to order dessert but he stopped her. “i have dessert at my place.’” which made her stop, the rush of butterflies and nerves at his words was enough to make her nod, close the dessert menu and request the check.

which he paid, in full, with…a platinum credit card.

she knew he was working for the government but jesus, he just whipped out the platinum to pay for their meal. she felt measly with her silly little plastic card in her purse, letting him escort her out the restaurant. they walked down the sidewalk until they get to a sleek black escalade. “did you drive here?” he says as he digs his keys out of his jacket pocket. she looks at him and then the car, “yeah, i did.”

“how about…at the risk of sounding too forward, you come home with me? stay the night, you can take the bed if you want and…i’ll drop out back off at your car in the morning?” he says with a small tilt of his head, his blondish hair flopping by his ear as she looks at him. a small smile graced his features, she let out a small breath, turning the thoughts of potentially doing this in her head.

she nodded with a small smile on her face, “i would love too.”

he nods towards the escalade, “cmon,” he unlocks the escalade and opens the passenger door for her. she hesitantly moves forward and slides into the passenger seat, looking around the interior of the car. she was in awe, shed never been in a car this…big before. also, it made her wonder.

leon wasn’t flaunting his wealth, he didn’t even seem to mind that he was somewhat wealthy. it made her have even more questions about him. they didn’t seem to end the more she spent time with him. was he not aware of how fortunate he was?

she was torn away from her thoughts when leon got into the drivers side of the car. looking over at her with a small smirk, “what?”

“you drive an escalade.” she states with a small blink, he shrugs and chuckles a little, almost finding it humorous. “so?”

he doesn’t realize this does he? good god, he’s a humble guy. why is that such a fucking turn on?

“it’s just…the escalade, the platinum card…?” she says with a small blubber as she looks at him, “your rich.” she states with little to no care for how it sounded. he chuckles and shakes his head, “yeah? im not too bad, i’ve got money.” he says with a small flush of his cheeks as he puts the keys in the ignition. she rolls her eyes, of course he’s not going to admit it.

he starts the car, carefully pulling out of the parking spot. she swallows as she watches his hands from the passenger seat, the way his large hands encompass the steering wheel and turn it. she’s watching, almost drooling at how his veins in his hands. she sees him look over at her and she quickly darts her eyes away from basically eye-fucking his hands.

they were just…fuck, the things she would let those hands do to her.

he smirks in her peripheral vision, sliding one of his hands over the console and to the exposed knee of her dress, slowly squeezing it. she swallows, the touch was somewhat innocent but causing a herd of butterflies to swarm her stomach. she felt her underwear get uncomfortable already. she lets out a small shaky exhale, trying to act nonchalant.

she was so fucked.

she surprisingly made it back to his apartment in one piece. he was acting like a gentleman, even with his hand on her knee, keeping a steady hold on it as he drove. he didn’t raise his hand higher, a part of her wished he would’ve.

but he kept it on her knee, his whole hand practically engulfed that skin on her leg. she watched him drive out of the corner of her eye, studying him like a painting.

he was so gorgeous, even in the dim light of the streetlights. she was fully focused on him, his eyelashes, the way his eyes carefully and precisely watched the road.

the way he kept his lips — pink and full — pressed together as he studied every other car around them. he wasn’t afraid, he was focused. she wondered if he always focused on things like this, or if he was just like this when he drove.

but his attention seemed divided, one hand on her leg, his thumb even moving in small circles on her knee. she didn’t know how he did it all at once, all with ease. it was like he was handcrafted by some god, some amazing grace. she just couldn’t figure him out.

but it intrigued her.

even when he made it to his apartment, parking outside the building and pulling the keys out of the escalades ignition.

he moved with such precision and confidence, like he knew his next move before he made it. like he had a plan for every step he took. she wishes that she had that grace about her, she was clumsy and not put together at all.

but when they get out of the car, making their way to the doors of the lobby, he was holding onto her hand tightly. his hand engulfing hers as they walked. she liked the way his hand fit into hers, like it belonged that way. like it was meant to hold hers. she tries to fight the butterflies and the very obvious tension as they make their way to the elevator in the lobby.

once the elevator dings and they make their way into the elevator, she feels hotter, like the sexual tension of what’s to come is taking up all the air. she squeezes his hand a little, she feels his blue irises travel to her and stay there. he must’ve lived on the top floor, because they stood there for a moment. his free hand traveling up to her hair, pushing it away from her face.

“there’s those beautiful eyes.” he whispers, it sounded like he was saying it more to himself rather then her. her cheeks flushed all the same, connecting her own with his, a small smile sliding onto her lips. “i have beautiful eyes?” she whispers to him, almost afraid to break the spell, the tension that was slowly building as they got closer to his apartment.

he smirks slowly to himself, saying a little louder, “your eyes aren’t the only beautiful thing about you.” he says as he pushes more hair away from her face with his free hand, sliding his hand into her hair and holding it there. a small breath leaving her lips, letting them part as she looked up at him from under her eyelashes. this man was something else, making her act out on the first date. which she never did.

“look at you,” he whispers, “such a good girl, you look so pretty.” he praises lowly, still holding her hair at the base of her skull in a tight fist. he was forcing her to look up at him, she didn’t even hate how her underwear flooded with need for him — for his hands. she just accepts the praise with a small embarrassed smile. she didn’t know how else to react, no guy had ever praised her so openly, called her beautiful.

her ex, he took her out on dates and the sex wasn’t too bad. but he never showed her off, loved her openly, made her feel special. that was the ultimate lead up to him leaving her for some girl he didn’t even know.

and it broke her, she never thought she’d feel that way again.

but here, with leon, she felt that familiar want. that need to be his and his only.

and god, was it terrifying. he was such a good guy, so attractive. she was so afraid that she’d screw it up in some way.

but it’s better to say she tried and failed rather then give up altogether.

the elevator dinger for his floor, pulling her out of her thoughts and snapping her eyes back up to his. she felt his h=free hand slowly leave her hair and his hand with hers, pulling on it towards the hallway outside the elevator. her stomach was a mess of knots and nerves as she followed him. her eyes taking in the surroundings around her, letting him practically drag her to his apartment.

and as soon as she was inside of his apartment, his lips were on hers and she was getting pushed up against a door. the first thing she registers is how amazing his lips are and how they feel against hers. she feels like her legs are going to give out under her, her lips meld with his. everything is happening so fast and her brain doesn’t have time to catch up to all of it.

before she knows it, he’s carrying her into his apartment, kissing every inch of her neck and jaw with his tongue and teeth. she lets out small sounds as he kisses her in spots that haven’t been touched in months. he puts her down onto the bed, hovering over her as his blue eyes meet hers. he looks so haunting in the moonlight. his sharp jawline and features, the way his cheekbones reflect in the moonlight thats streaming through the window.

“i normally don’t do this on the first date but your just…” he runs his fingers over the side of her thigh, making her dress pool up to her hips, “so fucking beautiful.” he whispers between them, like its a secret. she feels her cheeks flush nonetheless. she feels his hand slide up her thigh to the edge of her underwear, lace that she put on and didn’t even anticipate this happening. she feels her breath quicken and her spine straighten under his touch.

he’s so methodical with his movements and it makes her think, the contrast difference between her ex and him. he’s so gentle, like she’s made of glass beneath his fingertips. her ex never had that, rough and demanding movements. she draws the difference as leon’s fingers slowly pull the lacy fabric down her thighs. she keeps wondering why his fingers and hands seem so calloused, she should have asked earlier at dinner, not when he’s exposing her to the cool air of his bedroom.

she exhales as her lacy underwear are tossed to the floor, suddenly his jacket is coming off and he’s rolling up the sleeves of his dress shirt. she can only let her eyes trace the way his biceps are practically straining underneath the confines of his dress shirt, the way they flex when he grabs her ankles and drags her to the end of his bed. she feels her heart beat almost entirely out of her chest.

she can’t help it, she’s a soaking mess by now and the fact he can see that by looking in between her thighs is enough to make her cheeks heat up. she closes her thighs, pressing them together. he chuckles low in his throat as he looks down at her, “don’t hide from me. cmon.” he says as his blue eyes seem to darken under the harsh moonlight coming into his bedroom.

he gently opens her thighs, letting himself glance at her glistening arousal. “so wet already?” he says it as if its more of a statement, rather than a question. she nods under his gaze as if he has all the power over her right now and in a way, he does. and he knows it. “this all for me?” he says with an almost haunting smirk on his features that it causes her to sharply inhale. she nods again and feels her chest rise and fall beneath her dress.

“your boosting my ego too much, baby.” he says as he crawls over her, his hands bracing on either side of her head, he leans down so he’s nose to nose with her. his blue eyes almost blown out with lust for her, she recalls never being looked at this way by her ex. even when they had sex, he refused the intimate side and made her go face down in the pillows. but leon, he’s devouring her with his eyes right now and it almost makes her cry, but she doesn’t.

“what’s wrong? did i do something wrong?” he asks when he sees her eyes become glassy, surely he knows. he has a feeling that he maybe rushed it. should’ve let you go home after the date but…you looked sad. he cups her chin, looking down into her eyes. that action seems to make it harder for her to speak but she forces words out of her mouth. “my ex…he never…” she swallows more tears down her throat.

he watches her expression so closely — so methodically — that he’s afraid if he blinks, he’ll miss something. but he lets her speak, his hand slowly cupping her cheek, rubbing his thumb over cheek in a soothing gesture. even though he’s hard as steel right now and her pussy is out in the open, he is solely focused on how she feels right now. she notes in her brain that this is another reason why she likes leon so much already.

but she forces herself to finish her thoughts, “my ex never…he never…” she chokes on the words again. she realizes that it sounds stupid coming out of her mouth now, she almost wants to push it to the side and jump leon’s bones. but he’s not going to let it go until he knows she’s okay. “he never looked me in the eye, never…he wasn’t gentle.” she whispers as she looks up at him. she feels choked up and she hates how silly she sounds. like a hurt little girl who skinned her knee.

he sighs softly against her lips and brushes some tears from the crevice of her eye. he understands what she’s saying, her ex wasn’t intimate. didn’t take his time with her, didn’t put her needs first and that just doesn’t sit right with him one bit. in fact, it bothers him beyond recognition. how could someone just abandon their partners needs, the need to be validated and be intimate? he couldn’t change that for her but he could show her that he wasn’t like her exes.

“im not like that, princess. you know that by now don’t you?” he whispers against her lips as he gently brushes some hair out of her face. she nods almost immediately, “i know.” she says against his lips, solidifying that she knows. he could not even be compared to her ex, not even close. leon was far better than him and she’s only known leon for like five hours.

“good. now, im going to fuck you now. but listen,” he gently grabs her chin, a firm but soft hold as he angles her eyes to his. “i am going to take my time with you because you deserve that. you deserve to be loved and cherished.” he says softly with a small hint of compassion in his blue irises as he strokes his hand up and down her dress clad side. “and i am not going to let you look away, your going to look at me the entire time.” he says with a firm but rugged gentleness that suited him down to his very core.

she just nods slowly in his grip, that being the only thing she can do with his grip on her chin. he smiles — a little twitch of his lips — making him seem ten times more softer then he actually is. he leans back on the bed on his knees, looking down at her. “off.” he gestures to the dress thats still covering her. she swallows and sits up on his bed, slowly and methodically shimming the dress off of her frame.

once it’s gone and on the floor with her discarded lace underwear, she plays with the strap on her matching bra. he puts his large and calloused hand over hers, stopping her. “let me.” he mutters as he moved on his bed behind her, his fingers slowly tracing along her shoulder and going to the bra strap. he hovers his mouth over neck, his other hand brushing her hair away from her back, pressing his lips to her neck with such delicacy. she feels like she would miss it if she couldn’t feel his fingers slide down to the clasp of her lacy bra.

and once it’s discarded, he finds himself hoisting her backwards onto the mattress again. his lips finding hers in a sweet but delicate kiss that says — i have you, trust me. and she does, she finds herself trusting him as his hands hold her gently but firmly, a strong hold that weighs on her heart and mind.

she looks up at him through lustful eyes two moments later, her gaze locking on his as he strips off his pants and shirt, discarding them all on the floor. the body of a greek god, yet littered with small scars that catch in the moonlight. she thinks that maybe he has his own demons, the ones that haunt him when he goes to bed at night.

but she doesn’t have time to wonder, his cock, if not perfect like the rest of him. is now out, his hand slowly stroking the hard shaft for some semblance of relief. she gnaws on her bottom lip as she watches him, she was completely and utterly soaked now.

she didn’t know how much longer she could last. she needed him.

he didn’t wait long to lean over her body, his elbows on either side of her head, much like before. his nose brushing against hers and she was bare as him. it should’ve made her nervous, made her scared beyond anything. but she didn’t have it in her to be scared, not when he was eyeing her like she was the holy grail.

he pressed another kiss to her lips, a little more rough this time, his tongue prodding at her mouth. begging for him to be let in. and how could she not oblige him? she let him in and he swirled his tongue with hers, her brain on autopilot and the conversation about her ex was long gone. the furthest thing from her mind at this point.

it was just him. his mouth and hers, the way his cock barely brushed against her soaked folds. she parted her knees more for him, accommodating his wide frame as he let a hand drift down to her hip, squeezing it as they sloppy made out.

a small moan slipped past her lips and onto his, his large hand kneading the extra fat of her hip and thigh and slowly he moved his hand in between them, brushing over her clit slowly. her breath caught a little and she couldn’t find words, she was wrecked already.

he chuckled lowly against her lips, words not exchanged as he guided his bulbous tip though her folds. soaking his tip in her release and making her tremble, small squeaks of arousal leaving her parted lips.

he found it amusing, if the expression on his face was any indication.

he silenced her again with a smooth press of hiss lips against her’s, soothing her worries and the small amount of anticipation she felt. he slipped just the tip inside of her, breaching her entrance. she gasped against his lips, he was big. it was just the tip and she was keening. practically clawing at his bare back. he pressed his lips more firmly against hers, sliding in another inch, his thumb rubbing circles at her hip.

as he eased in inch by inch, she tried to focus on his kisses rather then how much he was stuffing her full inch by torturous inch. it felt like her body was buzzing, it was too much and not enough at the same time. she moaned softly when he slid in the rest of the way, she opened her mouth against his. she couldn’t handle it anymore. she lets out a shaky breath.

her hands held tighter to his back as he slowly moved his hips against hers. his hand squeezing hard at her hip enough to bruise but she couldn’t find it in herself to care as he slowly moved his hips, moving in and out of her. she bit on her bottom lip, almost drawing blood as his head dipped into her neck. she choked on moan after moan as he groaned and grunted against her neck, matching her noises in his own ways.

she let her nails sink into his back as he pumped his hips a little faster. her head fell back against his sheets, her lips parted, eyes shutting in ecstasy as he started hitting that spot within her repeatedly. she wasn’t going to last long if he kept it up, his harsh groans and breaths echoing along her neck and up into her ear. his lips pressing harshly to the skin. every time her nails dug into his bare back, he bit a little at her skin.

the pleasure and pain was intoxicating as he kept moving his hips, making her whimper and whine. she tried to speak but her words were caught and mumbles of pleasure were the only things to leave her parted lips. her expression wiped and dazed with lust as she took everything he gave her. never in her life had she felt this way with sex. she felt like she was floating and grounded at the same time.

she felt her stomach coil, knowing she was close to climax. she wordlessly moved one of her hands from his back into his dirty blonde locks, pulling his head out of her neck and pressing her lips to his. he just smirked against her lips and moved his hips a little faster, seeming to understand what she meant without words. she moaned louder against his lips as he pumped faster and faster, her head felt dizzy. her head dropped back against his sheets again, not enough energy to keep her lips locked with his.

“thats it baby, come for me. c’mon.” he growls as he nips at her neck, his hand sliding from her hip to her clit. rubbing it with small brushes of his thumb, she squeaked as she looked up at the ceiling. her eyes glazed over as the coil in her belly finally snapped. “fuck, your…squeezing me like a vice.” he muttered in a groan. he felt her spasm around him, his hips slowing as he fucked her through it.

he fucked her through it until she was squirming, he moved his hand off her clit. determined to chase his own release as he moved his hips again. he pressed his chest against hers and gripped her hip again. she let out a shaky gasp as he started moving again. her eyes watering at the overstimulation she was feeling in the moment. “shh, its…i’m close, baby. just hang on.” he grunts against her collarbones as he keeps moving his hips. she squeezed him a little again and he hissed.

she nods with a small whine as he pumps a little faster, practically shaking his bed. she was wondering if it was going to break but it didn’t seem like it would. his hips stuttering as he bit into her collarbone, she gasped in pleasure as she felt his spend fill her up and fill her belly. she blinked at the ceiling as he sighed against her collarbone. letting himself be vulnerable for a moment in the aftermath of their bliss. he just kept her filled with his cock, rubbing a hand up and down her side. his mouth gently pressing a kiss to one of her breasts. “your amazing.” he whispers as his eyes shut and he breathes some air into his lungs.

she felt his words deep down to her very soul as he pulled out of her, a small noise of loss as he removed himself from her snug walls. he laid down on his side next to her, sliding a hand down her stomach and to her entrance again. his spend mixed with hers was leaking out of her abused hole, his finger scooped up the fluid and pushed it back inside of her.

his eyes flaring with that possessive nature. he drifts his blue eyes to her blissed out face. he removes his finger from her entrance and traces it up to her jaw. he gently cups her chin and smoothes his thumb over her bottom lip. “good?” he whispers gruffly as he scans her expression. she smiles dazedly and nods as she looks up at him. it wasn’t how she imagined the night going but getting to here, it was good. leon unintentionally was making her move on from the slump her ex put her in. she couldn’t be more grateful.

he smiles crookedly, almost shyly, as if he didn’t just fuck her raw into his mattress.

“stay the night. i make good breakfast.” he says softly with a small chuckle, the boyish charm peeking out from his hard facade he had up. she nods with a small giddy smile, “only if you make me pancakes.” she whispers as her eyes stay locked on his blue ones. he was truly a sight to behold. every part of him was and she didn’t know how he could be single. she had to wonder if maybe he chose that for himself, for what reason? she didn’t know. he was a great guy.

an amazing kisser. funny, great in bed. the list kept going.

but he was nothing like her ex, that was the best thing about him. he wasn’t selfish, conceded and rude. maybe leon was the perfect one for her. maybe he wasn’t but she was trusting her gut this time. and her gut was telling her to stay, to let herself be coddled and be held like something precious. she was letting herself be happy for once and only time would tell if they were meant to be.

even if it was the first date, she was in love. silly, but true as she gently cupped his cheek and pulled his lips to hers again. she felt connected to him in more ways then one. she was diving headfirst into him and she didn’t even care. she was happy.

and thats all that truly mattered.

screw it only being the first date, she was his now. and that was a comforting thought as she slipped her arms around him again and breathed him in. this is what love was, or close to it, she was sure. his arms already felt like home, no matter how dangerous that was, it was hers.

and his, as it should be. forevermore. wrapped in each other, no matter what.

exes be damned.

taglist: @elihii @heartsforvin @adollrable @leonkennedygvrl @squazmine @spfoah @jmivenus @rcttendolly @yakamozhoez (if you would like to join my taglist, visit the link at the beginning or the one linked on my blog!)

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bugsinthebayou · 6 months ago

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☠️ land-hoe Follow

ok has anyone else noticed the tension between captain lyre and that triton woman

🫧 underthesea Follow

"that triton woman" is the princess of the entire undersea

☠️ land-hoe Follow

wait what

46,041 notes

⚔️ deckswabber Follow

FUCK ME LIFEEEE our captain be flirting with the fishes again

11 notes

🏴‍☠️ scrimshaw Follow

should i call her

4,212 notes

🧜 thetaleofnudibranch Follow

im trying to finish the script for my play but i keep overhearing her majesty angrily talking about that really famous pirate captain

🧜 thetaleofnudibranch Follow

ivory is trying to calm her down and its semi-working? the princess will go quiet for a few minutes and then she seemingly remembers another thing and starts ranting

🧜 thetaleofnudibranch Follow

she has been talking about the captain's eyes and how much they sicken her for an hour.

🧜 thetaleofnudibranch Follow

i shouldn't have taken this job

873 notes

🦈 inlesbianswithcalypso Follow

hey was anyone gonna tell me our princess was into women before i found out from a seablr post talking about her affair(?) with a pirate captain. i could've been fighting for her hand in marriage this whole time and no one told me

20,821 notes

🪸 guardsman-ivory Follow

Hello everyone! I just wanted to come say this as her majesty Calypso's personal guard; the princess is NOT having an affair with the famous pirate captain of the Scrimshaw! Her majesty infact hates that woman, and is trying her very best to kill her! Thank you for your time.

🗡️ piratedyke Follow

i saw the princess making out with captain lyre in some backwater bar a few islands away from the mainland. im sorry girl she's infatuated

1,201 notes

🦜 poly-polly Follow

i seriously cant believe you all can just live with captain lyre of the scrimshaw being here on tumblr!!! she's horrible. the things she's done are atrocious, she should NOT be allowed a platform like this!!!

☠️ land-hoe Follow

polly just say you're bitter about her dumping you and go

30,541 notes

🦐 as-shrimple-as-that Follow

who is captain lyre and why am i hearing so much about her????

🐳 whalesong Follow

op do you live in a trench or something?? she's the most wanted criminal oversea

🐳 whalesong Follow

also shes fucking the princess

🦐 as-shrimple-as-that Follow

13,073 notes

🏴‍☠️ scrimshaw Follow

GUESS WHO'S STEALING FROM THE NAVY AGAIN LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

53,729 notes

#oc: calypso nudibranch #oc: jasmine lyre #captains orders #lyrebranch #fake dashboard #fakeposting #unreality

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mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess · 8 months ago

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TGCF couples at the beach

Because i want to go to the beach so bad rn

HuaLian:

Hua Cheng isnt too fond of the sun or the water but gege said he'd like to go so they're going.

Everything is fancy and luxurious, only the best for gege.

A large beach bed with a canopy, drinks and snacks served at all times, the whole nine yards.

He wears those fancy sunscreen lotions with foreign names cause he may be dead but he also burns easily and turns into a big baby about it.

Xie Lian insists they dont need to do all that and can just chill in the sand with a towel, which Hua Cheng finds preposterous.

They have a big ass umbrella over the canopy bed too cause the sun is a deadly laser.

So much affection - cuddling, kissing, being all sweet and lovey, feeding each other watermelon and gathering seashells

Theyre sickeningly sweet

Hua Cheng is able to keep his hands to himself for about 5 seconds max

If there are any noisy kids or families around, Hua Cheng sends Yin Yu to scare them off

(They take Yin Yu with for this express purpise but hey free all inclusive vacation, a win is a win)

Xie Lian never burns ever and refuses to wear sunscreen. Hua Cheng pouts about it because 1) dont want gege to get a sunburn and 2) cant teasingly rub lotion over him smh

Hua Cheng builds one of those fancy sand statues of Xie Lian and he thinks its the most romantic thing ever

It is

So many kisses in the water and swimming together all lovey

Hua Cheng is never seen not drinking a margarita

"You do not need to keep your swim trunks that low, San Lang." "Gege, tan lines are terrible."

BeefLeaf

SQX cant get He Xuan out of the water once they arrive to the beach. Nope. That is his habitat now. He belongs to the fishes.

SQX rents out beach chairs by the bar because how can one tan without a drink in hand?

Skimpy swimsuits because SQX also abides by the tan lines are the devil mentality

Manages to get He Xuan out of the water with the promise of ice cream

Talking shit about everyone around while eating ice cream and drinking martinis

So many seashells. He Xuan gives them to SQX as an offering aw

"XuanXuan you cant drown people that say indecent things about me!" "Who says" "the law??"

He Xuan brings SQX little fish he catches if they look colorful or pretty

"XuanXuan, put some tanning oil on my back!" And He Xuan spends like 10 mins trying to find the correct bottle because SQX brought like 50 and the tanning oil SQX wants looks like literally every other bottle there

So many selfies

He Xuan digs tunnels in the sand whenever he isnt in the water. SQX has to talk him into not using the Earth Master shovel

Theyre checking out hot people together

He Xuan puts on sunglasses to pretend he isnt staring at SQX

"XuanXuan you cant throw jellyfish at children!!"

SQX flirts their way into free drinks and He Xuan broods about it but also he is deeply in debt so he can't turn down free shit lmao

FengQing

Arguing, so much arguing, but hey thats their love language

"Thats a shit spot for a towel" "okay find a better one then" "here!" "Thats like a foot away whats the difference??"

Feng Xin refuses to put on sunscreen cause he thinks its not manly

"You cant beat the fucking sun, Feng Xin!"

Mu Qing refuses to get his hair wet. Feng Xin makes it a point to dunk him in the water at least once

Feng Xin falls asleep in the sun like an old man and Mu Qing draws dicks on him with sunscreen lmfao

They argue about who goes to get drinks and snacks and just end up going together

Feng Xin insists to exclusively drink beer until he tries one of Mu Qing's deadly cocktail combinations and hes hooked. He insists they add a little umbrella to his drink now so he and Mu Qing match

Sand castles competition turned chasing into the waves turned underwater kisses

Mu Qing judges everyone and Feng Xin cant help adding in to the commentary because its surprisingly entertaining

Beach sports! Theyre so competitive too so its extra fun and they make bets over everything

#tgcf #tian guan ci fu #hob #heaven official's blessing #hualian #fengqing #beefleaf #original thots

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undertale-npcs · 8 months ago

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Made a nice lil image for the header of this blog :3

Spider Donut guy is freaking out about how affordable the drinks are here.

Fishbowl Echo Flower guy is at the front door ready to tell people about where all the activities are (cards and food).

Hotdog Harpy is like those sign spinner guys, shes advertising the food. Buy it!

Ragel, Diamond Kid, Normal Snail, and the Newspaper Editor are plotting a ttrpg game, the newspaper editor woman is good at writing so she is hosting, and the other three cant really go places on account of being Stuck in the ground, Slow, and A child, so this seemed like a fun activity they could all be a part of.

The monsters at the big table are playing cards, except Fox Head he's just trying to figure out the rules. Rabbit Kid is watching from afar and being judgmental over the moves they make. Punk Hamster is just chilling, who ended up appreciating the new faces at Grillby's.

Dress Lion is too anxious to talk to anybody yet, but theyre happy being able to go out in their dress.

Ficus Licker tried to leave through the fire exit but couldn't (hes not fire) so he's just been pretending to be a door inspector the whole time to avoid embarrassment.

Ice Wolf likes drinks.

Rock Wants A Drink.

Elder Puzzler is blocking the jukebox so that people only play music he approves of (none of it).

Business Dragon, Faun, and Hand Receptionist used to be friends back in high school and are all catching up.

Skateboard Girl is flirting with Fuku Fuku Fire.

Ugly Fish and Red Bird are just drinking and sitting silently together because they havent developed any personalities outside of "Being single" and "Speaking for Grillby". Theyre friends though so thats nice.

Drunk Bun and Red Demon are scoping out all the hot guys.

Fish Receptionist is the bartender today.

Charles and Loren are infodumping about their hyperfixations (work and stars, respectively)

And everyone else is just chilling.

#undertale

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justcallmesakira · 1 year ago

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HIII OMG I haven’t had a good laugh in a while until i came across your fyodor’s sis dating dazai hcs IT GOT ME ROLLING ON THE FLOOR 😭 can i request for dazai’s sister dating fyodor if you’re up for it? fluff crack make it silly if you want i’ll enjoy anything from you for sure!!

"Dazai with a sister dating Fyodor!"

Sypnosis: Uh oh! Looks like Dazais one and only sister he grew up with is dating a rat who the entirety of yokohama is after!

Genre: crack, suggestive? (idk sth is wrong with me)

Warning: More blasting, bombing, terrorrist, rizz,

A/N: AHHH I AM SO HAPPY U ENJOYED IT- AND I AM MORE THEN HAPPY BCS I MADE YOU LAUGH !!! >.<

nahhh like brother like sister :/

NO BCS i feel like fyodor just wanted to temper dazai by using his ugly breedable charms on you

But it backfired terribly! (like his posture)

Though you were his one and oNlY eNeMyS blood relative he just couldnt help but flirt with you and perhaps ykyk do those romantic stuff ppl do

This is so ooc rn ;skull emoji 69x;

However you were extremly LIKE extremly careful to not let your brother know

You literly sneaked off the house as if you were sneaking inthe kitchen to cook a whole buffet at 3am!!

Except you were sneaking off to EAT a whole buffet😏😏

Even the rat himself helped you to sneak to his rusty ahh apartment

Wow! The first thing he actually did for others!!!!!

Honestly dazai would be chill though-

Like oh his sister is dating someone? welp sure! i have exes all around the city hope its not one of them though hehe...HeHe

FUCKING SLU--

You took the risk of rizzing fyodor up infront of him though like:

"I am crime, I am punishment" you: "I know something else you can punish :3"

Dazai woke back from the dead with em bones fish eye when u said that

AYYY DAZAI IN HIS MELANIE MARTINEZ "PORTALS" ERA!!!!1😍

When he find out though.....oh god hes going to give you that light skin stare, with his eyes turning into nothing but a pitch black void

like my soul-- OKAY THIS IS THE LAST ONE I PROMISE--

One day you met up with fyodor and you were so excited that you nearly threw his anemic ass to the ground

"Yaaaah fedya,!! we finally met! dont give me that face do u know how hard it is to come and meet you when my lazy ahh brother puts trackers on me!" "Malyshka, please calm down---''

All of a sudden u could hear shuffling which instantly cautions the both of you only for your eyes to be meeted with your brothers eye turning into nothing but pitch black like the face he gave when he saw mori

your getting grounded <3

"Out of all people...out of 8 billion people, sister😀" "I-i-i-i i can explain"

he then looked at fyodor with the ugliest angry face ever "YOU FUCKING RAT HOW DARE YOU WOO MY SISTER WITH FEHUYOUR UGFLY AHH RATUTILLIE NO RIZZ MANIUPULATION I AM GONNA BLAST YO-"

damn.. dazai become eminem

the shift mood between to u then to fyodor was so funny

LIKE YALL SAW THE ADVICE FYODOR GAVE TO DAZAI IN THEIR CELLS? THATS A BIT--- UM YANDERE??????!!

"BROTHER CALM DOWN I WAS NOT MANIUPULATED TF-" "THAT WONT STOP ME FROM MY MANSLAUGHTER ARC" "WHAT?--"

#siblinggoalsfr

fyodor honestly only glared at him with a smile that said "If they annoy you, go for their sibling"

dazai YANKED Your arm taking you back to you apartment and just stared at you as if you got a B in maths

uh oh...

So YEAH after hours of not being able to calm him down he finally accepted!

Dazai gifted fyodor a dead rat in a helicopter after he accepted you guys😍😍😍

No bcz i think u and nikolai would have matching energy--

Nikolai: "Dos-kun bites his nails!" You: "Real except he bites my neck!"

one day ranpo jolted up from his seat with fisheye and slowly turned to you as if you ate his (dead)mother

"Dazai Y/N, you did not..." "Oh yes yes i just did :3"

everybody was so confused like did you steal his snacks or sth???

"like brother like sister i guess...." -ranpo after finding out his bestie is doing unholy things to his enemy

JKJK-

Dazai acted so overdramatic omg- ugh hes so babygirl

"I still cant believe it... MY OWN SISTER DATING-DAT-DATING A STINKY RAT! Wait- WHAT IF YOU GET MARRIED???????!!!!! WILL YOUR NAME BE D-D-D-DOS-DOE RATVESKY?? sis you better let him take your name WAIT NO I WILL NOT SHARE MY NAME WITH HIM UGFYDUTYFE"

dramatic gossip girlie fr

like its literly like

"I took your victory😈" "I took your sisters viriginty😈😈😈"

i am so sorry-WAHHHHHHHHHH- *gets shot in the head by reader for being so dirty*

during gatherings, they just smile at each other protesting in their minds who can take care of u better while your in a chair rollin around and going :3

kuro kuro kuro kuroooo kuro kuro kuro kuro ding luro kuro ding~

until your silly ahh falls! :D

And its just a second of time to see who can cath you first-

Dazais going to turn your wedding into an arson commitment!

"Breaking news!, Depressed man who half the fandom slanders burns down his sisters wdding venue with soy sauce!"

Well... its a funky ride! but hey its fyodor

A/N: i know its short but i tried okay- ENJOY!! i love doing crack if i cant laugh or be happy i will make others happy!! <33

Divider crds: @nikolaismasquerade

tags! @silverbladexyz @riiwrites @chuuyasboner @heartsfourdazai @atlasnessie @atsquie @tojifile @biscuits-lovely-corner @darling--angst

#bungou stray dogs #sakira!#bsd #bsd x reader #bungou gay dogs #dazai #dazai x reader #dazai sister #dazais sister x fyodor #fyozai x sister reader #lol #bsd crack #dirty pick up lines

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hipsdofangirl · 6 months ago

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puppy seal love

selkie! seokmin x reader

according to wikipedia…selkies are mainly associated with the Northern Isles of Scotland, where they are said to live as seals in the sea but shed their skin to become human on land.

for context: i imagine selkie coats in human form to be actual jackets. in this headcanon format, the arrows are connected with the idea directly above.

major warnings: after the physical dash-lined break there is 18+ content, so MINORS please do not go past, not accurate selkie lore but i would love to know more (also my personal take on some lore), not proofread, bss mentioned,

wc: unknown

selkie! seokmin who…

- collects rocks and pebbles for you

- collects various sizes of shells

- notices your necklace lathered with charms

- misunderstood and became sad when he saw you punch tiny holes into the shells. he immediately kissed you when he saw you put them on your necklace as charms

- gets jealous easily but cover sit with a smile. he later eases into the feeling and gets over it when comfortable; however when someone new comes around the process occurs again.

↳ his jealousy isn’t normal anger, most of the time, but a longing sadness and self-deprecation, knowing that he is technically a monster in the eyes of society

- uses his seal puppy eyes (in both forms) to get what he wants from you; if you do that to him, he will squeal and literally do anything for you

- catches many fish for you and tries to outdo others as a mini way of displaying dominance; even if you don’t eat them, he still will.

- rarely talks about his true feelings and thoughts about his technical double life yet yearns for it to be resolved

↳ it’s up to you to breach that barrier and break down those walls to get him to vocalize these thoughts; after that communication is his game and you both will never not understand how the other is feeling

- has the voice of an angel and gets compliments at work (as a singer at a local bar)

↳ you get jealous when the pretty men and women go up to him and compliment/flirt. seokmin doesn’t entirely see the process of flirting and engages in conversations

↳ specifically after you both open up to each other he is able to sense your possible jealousy and politely brags about you and ropes you into the conversation

↳ sometimes he won’t though so it purposely leads to something…

- leaves his coat lying around and is patiently out of sight, waiting for you to pick it up to either hang it up, put it in his room, or when you know he is there give it or wear it

- has a habit of clapping when he laughs in both forms

- when mad he won’t say anything but you can find him often looking at the sea or in his seal form alone in his room when he thinks you aren’t there

- when you’re sad or petty-angry will turn into a seal and attempt to lay on top of you, tickling your neck with his whiskers to hear your beautiful laugh once more

- has friends who were skeptical of him having a human mate due to controversial opinions and his somewhat-gullible personality

↳ however, when seungkwan recognized you were the one friends with his vernon and chan he warmed up to you well

↳ hoshi didn’t at first and portrayed it as shyness; it wasn’t until he accidentally saw you giving seokmin’s coat back (after you guys were together) and be weary about other of their customs, he knew you were a keeper and now he won’t stop following you and keep asking to go swim with him and play fetch

↳ seokmin loves these moments of watching some of his loved ones bond but gets pouty when you pat hoshi’s form one too many times after a perfect catch

↳ seokmin will then drag you out more to practice and show off until they both want to compete with you as the ref and pitcher

- loves to circle you when swimming in his seal form; he just loves when you embrace him as he is when you cant verbally understand him

↳ even on land will unconsciously circle you playfully and always have some form of contact with you; especially when you both parade each other around.

↳ in both forms, you can imagine his wide smile and crinkling eyes as he brushes against your body

- as a child, was scared for his sister when she had to go to the surface. he knew that females were more in danger and went with her whenever he had the chance.

↳ you never met his sister or family yet. he hasn’t seen them in a while as well. sometimes, when you go to the water alone, you spot words scrawled onto the sand and you believe they may be addressed to you.

↳ when seokmin stands at the edge, tempted to fully return, he sees the same handwriting encouraging him to keep moving forward.

—————

- lets his eyes darken when you thrust your head at him whether you’re angry or joking

↳ he doesn’t have the heart (nor want you stop) to tell you that’s a sign of a female wanting to mate

- always nips your neck while his hands ensnare your waist. the first time, you turned your attention to him and he just smiled before skipping away

↳ after getting tired of his innuendos you decided to tease him back and bite his neck: you both ended up with a lot more marks later that night

↳ this new power you have found… whenever you want him in the mood just bite his neck or his biceps or thighs or just anywhere. his grunts turn into whiny moans when you bite that one sensitive spot

- makes love with you when you wear his coat; however, because you get so easily hot in it, you both can’t go for long in it. he wanted to fuck you while you wore it many times but know you can’t take the actual heat

- will nuzzle the crook of your neck after getting you both cleaned up—more kisses ensuing

- won’t feel the affects of mating season until he wears his coat. do what you want with that information and good luck.

after a few months of courting and officially being together, you researched more about selkies, desiring to understand him better. you want to read his mind. you do not dream to offend him, scared of his frail nature; as if with one small push, he would fall to the ground and shatter before scattering. after both of your efforts to make it work, you dread the thought of falling apart, crushing your perceptions of one another; it would only add more fuel to the fire regarding both of your species.

after scrounging around online, there are two conflicting hypotheses about them that caught your attention:

you hope they never come true.

1. ‘they may be reincarnations of souls of people who once drowned…coming back for mysterious reasons—good or evil.’

2. ‘eventually, selkies must return to the sea; they are to never come back till 7 years have passed.’

however, seokmin told you that selkies thrive off communication! he wouldn’t lie to you to save his own skin, right?

a/n: my first actual piece of work/draft in the notes app that i finished. i was originally gonna post a short story, but i didn’t like it,,,so i made hcs instead. that’s why you can see little bits of info that don’t make too much sense haha.

puppy dog eyes?? nah make him a water type!!!!!

i have more ideas i want to headcanon out, but i love seokmin too much; also, this being in my notes, i need to get rid of, so i can make room for svt concert vids 😋.

taglist: @jcxbliss

#seventeen #svt #seventeen imagines #seventeen headcanons #seventeen hcs #seventeen fanfic #seventeen au #seventeen dk #seventeen dokyeom #seventeen seokmin #seventeen x reader #seokmin x reader #dokyeom x reader #dk x reader

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jackiespurnell · 5 months ago

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you once called me forever (now you still cant call me back)

hiii hi i present yall with a modern-day second-person fic ab trying to get over agatha by going on dating apps but realizing nothing ever adds up to what she had w agatha (was written for rio x agatha but could work for reader x agatha too)

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

𝑨𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒘𝒂𝒔 𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒏 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒎��𝒍𝒆𝒔 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒃𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒎𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒂 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝑯𝒂𝒍𝒇𝒘𝒂𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒅𝒓𝒊𝒗𝒆

You knew you couldn’t live without her. You knew you loved her. It was hard saying goodbye. You remember her tear stained face screaming at you, cursing your name and calling you crazy. Come to think of it, you are a bit crazy. It's okay though. Because she loved that. She loved your chaos, your possessiveness, your everything.

Agatha Harkness. It was an elegant name if anything, sounded almost royal maybe. Not crazy. No, a “crazy girl” name was something more like yours. But names didn’t really matter. Whether or not you look or sound like a crazy girl didn’t really matter.

Because she was just as crazy. Maybe not just as, because she was contained and controlled, but she was pretty close. She was the only one who ever matched your crazy, the only one who really knew you. You were never one for forever but she made you change your mind. That was scary. But she made your life one worth living. Witches are not typically “socially accepted” or whatever, and you expected your life to be spent in hiding. But she changed that. She changed your perspective on everything. She changed you.

So, when everything fell apart, it was only natural that you’d want to get back together. But you knew you didn’t deserve it, you knew she didn’t want it. No. You knew she did want it. That’s even worse. Because you hurt her and she knows that and she still loves you and you love her but you can’t have her. You have her love, her affection, but not her. Not again. Never again. There was no finding someone else, that would be rare. It’s hard enough finding someone who’s genuinely into you even after learning all the stupid, unhinged habits you have and it's even harder finding someone who’s not gonna question why you look the same in twenty five years.

'𝑪𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒗𝒐𝒊𝒄𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒇𝒇 𝒆𝒙𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒂𝒔 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒑𝒂𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒆𝒙𝒊𝒕 𝒔𝒊𝒈𝒏 𝑲𝒆𝒑𝒕 𝒐𝒏 𝒅𝒓𝒊𝒗𝒊𝒏' 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒍𝒆𝒇𝒕 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒇𝒖𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕

But, for now, it couldn’t hurt to try.

So, you go out to bars and clubs. You download dating apps. You do everything in your power to move on. You know it’s not gonna happen but it’s worth a try. You show pretty girls to your cat, Fredrick - otherwise known as Freddy (with a y) - and whether or not he hisses at the picture is an indication as to if said pretty girl is worth it or not. Typically all your getting is hisses. Even Fredrick knows those girls are never gonna measure up to her (although you suspect Freddy had something going on with Señor Scratchy, but hey, who are you to judge?)

So, ultimately, you start messaging a girl named Ari. She’s pretty, a few years older than you put on your dating profile (which is 35) and likes fishing. What a boring hobby, you think. What’s the point of sitting on a rock with a big stick poking at sea creatures who never did anything except just exist. Whatever, she seems pretty chill though. She likes emojis. Typically uses the kissy faces whenever she’s trying to flirt. Agatha used to do that. You used to find it cute, endearing but now it just seems corny. Still, it’s good for you to get out. So you schedule a date. Just a cute little cafe, 2pm. You find yourself not caring all that much how you look, but you try to put into the effort anyways. Agatha would say you looked good no matter what. But this isn’t Agatha, is it?

So you show up. Go on the date. She’s nice, funny, perfectly fine. But you don’t want perfectly fine do you? No, you want someone who would be your alibi when you go and kill someone in cold blood because you were bored. You want someone who call you pretty with said person’s blood smeared all over your face.

But also, you want someone who would stay up laughing with you until three in the morning, holding you when you’re sad and telling you that you’re worth more than you let yourself believe you are. That you’re not a bad person. That you’re worth loving.

But enough with the self pity. Ari was obviously not the one for you, so, onto the next date.

𝑵𝒐𝒘 𝑰 𝒂𝒎 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒄𝒌 𝒃𝒆𝒕𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒍𝒂𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏'𝒕 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒎𝒆𝒎𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏' 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏 𝒔𝒎𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒘𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒅𝒐𝒆𝒔 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒓𝒆𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒂𝒎 𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒓𝒊𝒇𝒊𝒆𝒅 𝒐𝒇 𝒘𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓 '𝒄𝒂𝒖𝒔𝒆 𝑰 𝒔𝒆𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒊𝒕 𝒓𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒔 𝑫𝒐𝒄 𝒕𝒐𝒍𝒅 𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒗𝒆𝒍, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆'𝒔 𝑪𝒐𝒗𝒊𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒆𝒔

The next girl was named Dorothy. Dot for short. Like, a polka dot. Who names themself after a polka dot? She does, you suppose. Still, you call her Dorothy in your head. This one is into yoga. Hate to break to you, but you’re 41 and have been at this for 13 years. If you’re not flexible now, it’s not happening any time soon - or anytime in general. You laugh at your silly little jokes, Agatha would think they’re funny. She always thought you were funny.

You meet her at a park. It’s really awkward. She’s not as sociable as Ari, who, as non interesting as she was, at least she tried. This time you were doing all the talking. Acting as if you even wanted to be there. You faked a job interview halfway through, excusing yourself from the conversation. I mean, hey, a girls gotta work, right? (And you totally have been working this whole time, not living in the old apartment of one of your now-unalive victims.)

Agatha would have kept your interest. You would’ve canceled the stupid job interview to hang out with her in some dirty park. But that’s not an option anymore, is it? So, one last try, you decide. One more girl. One more try. Just one can't hurt....right?

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝑽𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒐𝒏𝒕, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒊𝒕'𝒔 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒐𝒏 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒔 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰 𝒔𝒂𝒘 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒎𝒐𝒎, 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒈𝒐𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒆𝒙𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒊𝒕'𝒔 𝒉𝒂��𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒂𝒖𝒍𝒕, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑰 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒗𝒊𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒎 𝑰'𝒍𝒍 𝒅𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒌 𝒂𝒍𝒄𝒐𝒉𝒐𝒍 '𝒕𝒊𝒍 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝑪𝒉𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒎𝒂𝒔

This next girl is named Leena. She likes art. Art is pretty cool, you suppose. It’s pretty cool. Better than provoking innocent animals or having unrealistic body goals, You ignore the fact that she looks a lot like Agatha. You also ignore the fact that the other two girls looked a bit like Agatha as well. Surely, it’s just coincidental. Right?

Not like you base beauty standards around your ex because why would do that? Not like every time you see someone who you’d consider beautiful you think “not beautiful like her” Not like you even think about her because why would you do that. You have no reason to do that.

Whatever. It’s whatever, is what it is.

The date is definitely the best - and it lowkey sucked. You went to some breakfast diner. She was talkative, the conversation flowed, she was even funny. Had a sarcastic, even dark, sense of humor. She was, hypothetically, your type.

Which is what sucked the most. Because she was everything you would have wanted into a girl. But still, you don’t want her.

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰'𝒍𝒍 𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎 𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒉 𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒐𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝑻𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝑰 𝒎𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝑰 𝒅𝒊𝒅 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒆 𝑵𝒐𝒘 𝒚𝒐𝒖'𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒊𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒆𝒔

No, you want the girl you spent the last half century loving. You want the girl who knew all your bad habits, your hopes and your dreams, who made you feel like you feel as if perfect as you were, as if you didn’t need to change. You don’t want these other girls who’s name you can’t even remember - what was the last girl, Layla? - you want Agatha. She’s not just any girl, she’s your girl. Was. She was you girl. She said she’d love you forever.

That turned out to be a lie.

Still, you think, maybe someday it will work out. Someday you two would meet again and you could be happy together. Someday everything would be okay. It doesn’t matter that all the signs are pointing to the fact that you two just very obviously aren’t meant to work. You could make it work. You would move the earth and the oceans with your bare hands for a chance to make it work. Because love isn’t just a feeling. It’s a reason. For living, for laughing, for crying, for everything. The reason behind you - behind anyone - getting up out of bed each day isn’t because you have to. It’s because of love. So you can find something you love, so you can do something you love. So you can see someone you love. Touch them. Hold them.

𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑚𝑦 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑜𝑛, you wanted to tell her. 𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑎𝑟𝑒.

Maybe someday you’d get to tell her that.

𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝑰'𝒎 𝒔𝒑𝒍𝒊𝒕 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒂𝒍𝒇, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕'𝒍𝒍 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒅𝒐

But today was not that day.

#agatha all along #agatha harkness #rio vidal #marvel #mcu #kathryn hahn #aubrey plaza #agatha harkness x reader #agatha harkness x rio vidal #lesbian #wlw #lgbtq #ao3 #fanfiction #whumptober #songfic #stick season #noah kahan #my friend came up with the ocs names btw

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