#cant believe i never posted this one before
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Sorry to keep dragging you through Arcane hell (the new season is... oof) but I am curious what your thoughts on silco are? Realising more and more that silco and sevika are the only part of the show I gave a fuck about and my love of season one was really just those two.
i keep putting things under a readmore so if ppl dont want to see me go "damn this was good i wish it was better" they dont have to
i think silco on paper has potential to be one of my favorite characters on the show, and barring that at least one of the most layered and well crafted. his and vanders dynamic is by no means unique, its very professor x and magneto, which is already something i can take or leave. "oh we were childhood friends and allies fighting for a better future but one of us got soft while the other became hardned and radicalized" the narrative of the terrorist freedom fighter, one corrupted by power is done a Lot bc of a general apprehension in shows like this to endorse violence on the behalf of the oppressed class BUT i think his relationship with jinx was a good addition and if like one or two changes were made it could have been some of the best the show has to offer
for the sake of this post, im going to ignore the reveal that silco knew jinxs mother before her death i think that was dumb and bad. essentially, the show begins with silco and vander at odds- they both are doing what they believe needs to be done in order to secure zauns future, and both of them are ultimatrly hurting zauns people; silco is flooding the streets with shimmer and vander is working with enforcers. silco is primarily motivated by power, but vander is motivated by his love for his kids, this is the only way he has even the slightest assurance that he can keep them from run ins with the law, a law that has a precedent for tossing children in maximum sexurity prisons.
vanders death and silcos subsequent acqusition of jinx flips the coin. there is now something in his life to love, to protect, to care for. he is falling into the same behavior that vander was, even if he is far worse at it bc hes a terrible father whos also a drug lord and just kind of lets his unstable daughter sit in a. ave and build bombs all day. hes not *good* but he *cares* evidenced by him literally needing to be sedated when jinx gets surgery so he didnt flip the fuck out
in a straightforward narrative, this is a story about a man having to choose between his daughter and his passion project. zaun is something he has given his life for, hed do anything to have it succeed... except one thing. that one thing. "there is nothing so undoing as a daughter" is probably one of my favorite lines in the show. i really do wish we had gotten More of them, especially at the beginning when she was a baby and silco doesnt really know what to do with her, which brings me to my next bit-
i think sevika is an indespensible part of the triangle of silco and jinx triangle. i find her position interesting as she is not only second in command, but second to jinx, a literal child. she can be the best right hand man a guy could ask for, she is so dedicated to his cause she betrayed vander, she has given her life and limb for this shit. but she will never be jinx. and i think the conversation of like, how far will silco go before he is forced to choose is kind of awesome. the ultimatum jayce gives him is good it is the breaking point of him trying to do both. he is directly responsible for the "monster" piltover is hunting, he didnt try to keep her in line, he let her do whatever she wanted and he is now directly reaping the consequences. frankly, i think sevika should have been present for that choice in some capacity, eavesdropping or something, so certain that hell make the right choice, its just a girl. and she sees him falter. him not choosing is a choice, he cannot actually make the sacrifices required to get shit done. hed orphan a thousand children to build his utopia, but he cant let go of his girl
anyway all of that was really cool and interesting so you imagine my frustration when his choice is taken from him via jinx flipping out, kidnapping him then shooting him. it was so. anticlimatic. it *feels* like its supposed to be a tragedy, oh she assumes the worst when he was actually going to choose her, but those conclusions feel too. private. like he dies with basically no one knowing he was this close to selling zaun up a river for his girl. i dont think he should have died i think he should have been disgraced for daring to have it all. anyway i think instead of jinx overhearing him talk outloud and coming to the wrong conclusion sevika should have deliberately led her there 1. to piss her off on purpose and 2. prove a point to silco that jinx is unstable and a liability, but not assume shed go far enough to kill him, bc they both still care about him.
overall any of my issues with how his story goes is just a combination of my distaste for that particular archetype, where he is so incredibly comically evil i cannot take a single one of his points seriously even though they Are correct (killmonger. its just killmonger again) and the show just once again not having time for anything with him that is not The Plot. the fondness he has for jinx is apparent i just wish it could COOK longer i wanted MORE, i wanted to see him foster that love of inventing in her, even though it is clearly just because the weapons she makes are helpful to his cause, i want to see her genuinely give input on his ideas, i want to see them talk about vander. his human elements are like too sparse for me to latch on to its like the Idea of them, i go oh i see what you guys are Trying to do. there is too little of him i see him cooing over his daughter then going back to his crack cocaine mines staffed by orphan children and i ask does the show jave anything to say about this cognative dissonance? no? i find it really telling that one chem baron was pissed at the enforcers for her son dying, and yes they were Definitely a factor but WHY DO YOU HAVE YOUR SON WORKING IN THE CRACK COCAINE MINES MAAM. YOU WERE KIND OF ASKING FOR IT. theres no like, conversation about what the corrupting influences of power does to the next generation even when the best of intentions are had. jinx constantly taking shimmer in season 2 for power ups, a direct product of her fathers worst tendancies, and it having NO ill effects on her, shes not reduced to the animalistic state of the drug addicts we are CONSTANTLY seeing on the streets bc. why. is she built different. the metaphor is RIGHT THERE her father/shimmer enable her but they are also killing her from the inside mein GOTT.
also the first time i watched this show i kept confusing him with viktor lol
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aaand here's deadlands! it didnt take seven months this time, who cheered?
i'll probably do another post grouping all of my line-ups together, but that's gonna wait for when i do the wyrdwood PCs as well :] more thorough design thoughts/smaller details will be under the cut, but im putting this here so that everybody has to know: their eye shines are all different card suits, except for nate, who gets J for the joker card :]
oxventurers guild | the hobby horses
unlike my other designs where i let everyone have individual colors/palettes, i tried to keep colors more consistent across these designs! the oxventurers guild has the fantasy element and theyre all very different, so the wide mishmash of colors are fine, and the hobby horses all have a lot of dark colors so that keeps them looking consistent together. but for these guys, i wanted a more consistent feel, so i tried my best to reuse colors between each design (especially between delacy and nate ^-^)
silas - ough. my boy. i wanted him to be broad with a strong build, and i hope i pulled that off :D i had so much trouble with his hat that i almost just didnt give him one, but eventually i decided it was better to just. give up and rock with it, even if he looks a bit like a mountie hbjgfjhd and he is wearing cowboy boots, theyre just tucked into his pants because he doesnt feel the need to flash them (looking at delacy, lol). he has spurs on his boots, even though he doesnt ride horses, because he likes the way they jangle <3
garnet - people really liked it when i gave garnet dark roots, so i have decided to always give her dark roots. i like how it looks hehehe and i also like to give her freckles!!! i think theyre cute!!! for the vest, i struggled for a while trying to capture the vibe of jane's vest, because its so so strange and specific in a way that makes it impossible for me to picture garnet without it. i'm pretty happy with where i landed with it, especially the pattern, since i've never tried to make a pattern like that before :3 i dont know why ive been loving patterns so much lately LOL but i will keep riding this wave and regret it later when drawing the designs again
edie - definitely the furthest departure from canon outfits, though still in the right wheelhouse. i just don't like drawing multiple layers of ruffled skirt. i didn't like how my sketches kept looking. i wanted to give her a skirt slit, especially after my friend reminded me about her thigh rifle holster. so today, i stared at a bunch of victorian ballgowns and party city costumes, and then completely redesigned her skirt before i lined these XD and i think it was worth it!! i love the layers and the way her rifle peeks out, and it meant i could show off more of her boots and give them a pretty design :]
delacy - my main thought going into drawing delacy was just. "i need to malnourish this boy" LMAO i refuse to believe that he is eating properly, i just know that he is not. otherwise, i mostly just stuck to the campaign art but scuffed up his clothes a bit. as implied on silas's notes, i very purposefully had his boots be Big. he's overcompensating a little bit :] also sorry i did not want to draw rooster so he just gets a generic handgun. i didnt feel like drawing complicated guns, and i wanted it to be a smaller handgun so that he could be poorly copying edie :') he has no trigger discipline but neither does edie so its fine
nate - that's just nate, baby!!! i think, canonically, he's meant to be a bit. emaciated. but i cant help but just picture him being a bigger guy, i think it fits his vibe better and its more fun for me to draw that way. i like having variety in body shapes, and garnet and delacy already have the rail thin thing down for this line-up. let my old man be fat !!! also. he has a weird nipple because he is transgender. heart emoji
#oxventure#oxventure deadlands#silas flint#garnet munro#edie valentine#delacy oxventure#nate janssen#'travis you forgot the buttons on a few of the shirts-' SHHH SHHHHHHHHHH DONT LOOK AT THAT IM TIRED#i just wanna move onto wyrdwood im done with these bhjgfhjdbghjd#i am super happy with how this came out though :3#okay time for sleep i have a friend visiting tomorrow and its past my bedtime
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more trevek and/or tomjake drawings plsplsplsplspls
I dont draw TomJake much but I do always have more Trevek
#disventure camp#trevek#trevor disventure camp#derek disventure camp#cant believe i never posted this one before#One of my earliest Trevek drawings and yet still one of my favs
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happy belated valentines day quodo upon thee! originally posted on ao3 for the quodo minifest, this was my valentines for @chacusha, who organized the event! i had a ton of fun drawing them and im definitely looking forward to next year <333
+ bonus art based on the comic by Kate Beaton, Javert is in Slash Fiction:
#quodo#quodo minifest#star trek#star trek ds9#Quark/Odo Kiss ///REAL NOT FAKE/// CLICK HERE>>>>>#did someone say quodo rights night??? either way Here it IS <3#i added image descriptions to the alt text but let me know if you need them visible under the post as well!#initially i was going to post this to twitter months ago but alas. re: the state of things and life in general#anyway this was so much fun !! it literally got me motivated to draw...i couldn't stop i had to keep going and did another...then another..#i should compile all the other drawing i did of them bc oh Boy there were a Few#also getting odo's features just right was harder than i thought. meanwhile quark was like BOOM! there he is :)#also did u see the shoe. did u see the shine did u see it. bc i swear im never coloring shoes again#all the refs i had to use.....and if you think i exaggerated quark's fat ass well Think Again i only took from Reality! it's all there bby#my obligatory one art post a year....what was my art tag again.......oh well time to revamp it#myart#also pls go read the other fics!! i know i made a post of this before but i cant believe the one i received back...kisses them.#it was perfect! literally made for me! in fact im reading it right now! wedding of the century by sirenoftitan and Boy was it ever!!!
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i dont think kaveh and alhaitham were romantically involved back in the akademiya. and in fact i believe that the repressed pining particularly from kaveh's part made their friendship breakup worse
#i cant elaborate Yet. but i feel it#i dont know if alhaitham was repressing it as much as he was just. silently sitting in it#anyway yeah i like it better if they have never kissed each other. have they thought about it. oh yes extensively. but it never got to that#their bond kept taking homoerotic undertones back in the day but it never quite bloomed into anything#like not even a friends w benefits situation#maybe it would have if they had less issues. but its better that it only becomes something more years later#i also have feelings about them being an established relationship in current canon. as in like. how would that come to be#i like the idea that it would just slowly happen until kaveh sits up one day and is like huh. this is like. it's like we're married.#al-haitham. are we married?#BUT i believe they need to have Conversations before that can happen. but its still possible#sighs.. kavetham on the mind today tomorrow and the day after too#my posts#kavetham#haikaveh#kaveh#alhaitham
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Post that has rerouted my brain
#this is legitimately so world changing for me because never before in my whole like 2 years of undyne obsession Ive really just stuck to-#-my own observations about her character. but OML.#after reading this. for the very first time ive had this absolutely mind crushing moment where someone else has made an insanely correct-#observation about her and her character and just all these little things that are lightly implied THAT I SOMEHOW DIDNT NOTICE BEFORE!!!!!!#AND WHEN I SAY THIS HAS CHANGED ME. THIS PERSON WHO POSTED THIS. THIS PERSON THEY ARE SO CORRECT OMG#AND I JUST#DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MANY CONNECTIONS THIS HAS JUST MADE IN MY MIND. THE SUDDENLY MAKING SENSE OF EVERYTHING THAT I AM EXPERIENCING.#YOU DO NOT EVEN KNOW OH MY GOD#this isnt even just a ''im begging you to read this post i found its rlly good''#its a ''THIS POST I FOUND MAKES AN INCREDIBLY CORRECT POINT THAT I SOMEHOW NEVER MADE BEFORE AND MY BRAIN HAS BEEN CHANGED FOREVER NOW.''#THIS IS. THIS IS SO#its just really a lot to me to see someone who originally didn't really think much into undyne really#but there by making one small crucial observation here it has just blown my world of this character and just who she is etc etc efce ceecceg#i honestly cant even believe i never even picked up on this until literally just now while just searching undyne on google-#-because of how much i needed to see something new of her#AND DID I!!!!!!!!!#that is insane to me how did i never even see this this is changing my everything i am so in love with this post#undyne appreciation my absolute fucking beloved#undyne#undertale#undyne undertale#hdjdjdkskskaaass omgggg hdhdjdndnddn guyss you don't even know#this might not even seem like a lot but it has just opened up so much for me i promise I'll make it all make more sense one day trust me ily
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i sense how on the contrary, when moon is in Zeph’s local group the members will all go ‘omg youre actually letting us do this’ or be surprised of her leniency with almost anything(or if she gets upset she wont be yelling her ass off and will try to remain calm), because of how Zeph would usually be so strict with em and they didnt expect better
see- first you gotta understand that the chancla doesn't really Hurt the iterators. while they definitely can feel through their puppets, those things are made to be sturdy (throw a normal or singularity bomb into Pebs' chamber,he's fine, i know he just doesn't have health but worldbuilding is worldbuilding so i guess a fully functional iterator is fine with blackhole into the head). it maybe stings for a sec but it's not worse than gettin pinched (also where did you get that she yells at em, she's only exclaimed so far i think. if you check how she handled Innocence, that's how she generally goes about it- no yellin for the sake of puttin 'em in place, she's just venting out her frustrations into the air)
the Point of the chancla is to get the target's unwavering attention so she can talk some sense into them WITHOUT using the senior privilege which is far more invading since it cuts straight through their systems and forces the juniors to stop everything to pay attention. these things are giant supercomputers! they are going to have a different perspective on what counts as "too much"/"too bad" than us humans! it isn't used to limit what they are doing unless the thing they are gon do is explicitly threatening to their safety, the limiting is what the Senior Privilege does!
in that lil comic with Pebs, Suns, Nish, Inn and her, she doesn't actually even hit Nish in the last panel, the chancla is only supposed to suddenly appear from behind next to his face n he gets startled + drama queen points. i've admitted in the tags of it that i gave up on the last page so i don't blame anyone for not gettin that since i haven't put enough effort into communicating it
with what she's doin back in her own group, she Needs to be this strict if she wants her plan of keeping everyone reliably long-term safe to work
and her groupmates would undeniably miss her. they love her! they don't want some lenient stranger without constant spice to her instead of their ramshackle beloved Azzie!!!!
#Spot says stuff#rw#oc tag#remember!!!!! important point to her character that also bothered me at some point with how similar it makes her to Moon was that shes Kind#Zeph is kind almost as much as Moon but their situations- concerning all their past present and future- are strikingly different and so#their lives require them to have different approach to things. what Zeph is specifically doin different from Moon is that shes Firmer#strictness isnt wrong!!! if you arent strict on either yourself or the people around you then it is easy to breach boundaries n do-#-Terrible things. its. honestly why i got real sad when a peep asked me to tag that one post as abuse. its not that believe me Zeph would-#-Never abuse another iterator. shes specifically trying to get around that while still keepin them sensible. but ofc ill tag it as such 4 u#look where Moon's leniency got her! dead and hurt and everyone who loved her suffering! there are times when you Need to be firm and cut-#-a bad situation at its bud before it can spiral into something absolutely damning#i didnt include it cuz it isnt Funney™ but after each chancla she talks to the target about why what they did was wrong#Suns you cant send that. it can hurt him very badly. Innocence you need to respect other people. Pebbles this will Hurt me if u keep doing-#-what you are doing right now. it could *kill* me. why are you doing this in the first place? do you need to talk? need me to listen?#being strict and being cruel or dictatorial are different things
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Boy King Seb :D
#thank you to Grace for the idea of making his chivarly collar red bull instead <33333#he was gonna have both collars but then making that one made me suffer so no not today#this was a lot of fun but also made me suffer. but i keep looking at it and being like AAAHHHHH BABY!!! BABY BOY!!!!!!!#can you believe i tried to do this in one night? i cant#i stopped and came back to it and was like 'no way you could do this in one sitting at 1 am'#this is kinda the ascended form of that very first sketch i made for this au! concentrated boy king sebby!!!#i say to myself i need to take a break from drawing complicated things but youll prob see a nando version of this in less than a week ;;;#okay about the drawing(i wrote good tags and then tumblr deleted them so these are a bit inferior AGH):#this is typical pouty seb but is also referenced off a specific pic from AD 2009(beloved)#its very important to me how emotionally open Seb is. im not sure the specific context of this. maybe after a triumph?#but instead of being that typical stoic serious detached kind of ruler; i like him being openly emotional(think AD 2010)#its important as well for his dichotomy with nando and how they choose to portray themselves#seb is very assured in himself and his rule vs. nando who is more insecure and bitter about his#so nando takes strides to portray himself in that more stoic calculating way bcs he feels like it helps him legitimize himself better#whereas seb has absolutely no care for outward public image and shows how he feels and is loved for it(nando hates it but loves it)#not that nando cant be fun and whimsical!! but to me he always seems a bit more mysterious; like i can never tell his true thoughts tbh#anyways i feel like ill finish 10 more drawings before i end up posting the lore pt 2 LMAO#its just a lot harder to organize and layout compared to part 1 which was just an explanation#pt2 would be a mix of more world building/characterization/anecdotes ive talked about with mutuals(LOVE YOU GUYS!!!)#i have a *lot* of ideas (gotta whip out my notes app every once in a while to write down stuff abt it) just hard to put into a coherent pos#sebastian vettel#f1#formula 1#f1 art#formula 1 art#f1 fanart#formula 1 fanart#catie.art.#*ill prob make a process post later if anyone is curious!! its fun to write abt my process and influences and such#boy king au
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Yesterday I came back from my first ever holiday on my own. Today I spent the whole day relaxing and only doing laundry as I traveled almost all day yesterday. I had a lovely time, it was great to be able to decide what I wanted to do on my own and then doing it or deciding to do something totally different. I really enjoyed it, it felt really freeing. It also was a bit lonely sometimes, especially when I would be the only one on my own. Like when I ate breakfast at my hotel and was surrounded by couples, friends and family. Or when I went out for lunch or dinner on my own. Also the fact that you can't share it and talk about it with other people. I spammed my family with pictures just to feel like that for a bit. But the positive things did really outshine the negative ones. Who knows, I might do this again and travel farther or longer. But this was a great start!
#me#personal#holiday#i went to one of the dutch islands#i always wanted to go back there#spent my days biking and walking#sitting in the sand watching the sea#walking barefoor on the beach and in the water#just enjoying everything#even felt like crying sometimes that i was doing this#being able to do this and that i didnt chicken out#also sometimes felt like a loser when i asked the hotel manager questions#i've never stayed at an hotel before#and my anxiety made that very clear to me#but for the biggest part it was a really positive experience#it felt like an adventure#one i didnt think i would ever be able to do a year ago#and now i did it#im really proud of me#and i still almost cant believe i did this#anyway#might post some pictures tomorrow#i took quite a few#just me rambling#but this is the only place i know where i can post this#get it out of my head and my system
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I should get some more of my mutuals over to this blog so its not just either go into drafts like im just talking to the air, or basically just a one on one with cici (and kiwi, hi kiwi). also google how to get better at conversations
#that last sentence sums up 2 drafted posts i just made. :/ man sucks that its been my goal for my entire life to get better at talking#vary it up man stop beating yourself up over not knowing how to start and hold a conversation. actually new one to that how to not feel the#need to leave a conversation. also another thing in those drafts and I’ve thought about yapping about before- I truly believe the best of me#comes out when im helping people especially when online so its like :/ sorry i suck at showing my average self and I feel like you cant say#stuff about how I actually am without seeing my average stuff#I have such. It’s not a contest I know it isnt but these problems seem so normal. I don’t hate myself I just want to be better at talking#and i dont know how so I feel like I dont have a future#its wild how much easier it is to get stuff out in the open in the tags of posts#and I say all of this and then my brain pulls up all of the compliments ive been given and it tells me not to say anything#cause look youve got your proof that this isn’t actually an issue- no such thing as needing reassurance~ youve got a memory that works short#term at least#for the things that are important at least like your friends.#so you don’t need to hear something twice~ and thats also part of the problem isnt it you never want to repeat something cause you’ve been#idk taught that- idk people dont forget things- if you actually cared you’d remember- its rude to forget~ so make all of your memory short#term so you don’t make people feel bad by not remembering even tho like that one post says foregting isn’t a moral thing#mm this says more than my drafts. but we die like people I guess and posting this i go#vent
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i genuinely need to be put down like a dog i cant do this anymore man holy shit
#yall dont know the meaning of terminally online til u meet me#i hate myself so much its not even funny i am the most miserable worthless scum#my sleep schedule is 7am to 3pm all i do all day is rot on the couch and sometimes draw if i have a drop of motivation#depression is completely kicking my ass and im not even fighting back i give up what the fuck man#theres not even a point for me to keep trying i just want to stop feeling such deep despair 24/7 please#i dont want to die i just want the pain to stop so i can peacefullylive out the rest of this year before i turn 18 and its all over for good#but i cant even have that! im just gonna suffer the whole time thanks great#i wish i could just get better and fix all of this but i cant its not working we dont have the money to#actually get me the help i need to make it work. i just have to figure it out or die#i just wanna go back to ***** ** *** i just want to stop being lonely and useless#i dont know why im posting this shit to tumblr. its so stupid i should just be journaling or something#probably because im worthless selfish scum. idfk.#the last 6 months have been a complete blur. just rotting on the couch or in bed occasionally seeing friends once every other month or so#ive already wasted half of being 17 abd im probably gonna waste the rest too. ill do nothing of worth before i die.#even my art is ugly and horrible and not worth leaving behind. people tell me to work to improve it but i dont have the time left#ill never create any of the things i wanted to create ill never be a good artist im just going to die exactly like this#an absolutely terrible person.#the only people i can talk about the things that make me a terrible person with are people who are terrible in even worse ways#no one can comfort me except them because theyre the only people who know what ive done and actually do see it as less than absolute evil#because they know absolute evil because it is them. but i actually don’t believe that i think theyre bad but could be good#idk what im saying anymore#someone shoot me#please im not kidding#just make it stop#tw vent#tw sui#delete later
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Soon im rly gonna do it
#🕸️#sui mention#< in the tags tho cuz it feels nicer to talk abt this in tags than in the post itself cuz to me posts are like talking normally but tags are#like whispering? talking you can tune out if you want but whispering is rather more voluntary to say it doesnt matter however#every single year passes and i wish i didnt live in each and every one of them i feel disconnected dissatisfied empty disappointed every day#it can be a small part of a day or a bigger but its still there clenching onto me like and never letting go im tired of it theres always a#wall between me and otyer ppl im unsure if i put it there or was it put there by other ppl but its there and even if anyone tries to reach#into it do i understand how even if close are we really far away it makes me understand just how much of an abnormality i am and how much i#cant ever be like them no matter how much i try and climb and crawl until i bleed its exhausting its maddening#almost everything i do is shaped by spite i wear one bracelet for years out of spite i dont smoke out of spite i dont shave my hands not#only because im normal abt body hair but also out of spite the more i know ppl the spiteful i get only way for me to truly like someone is#to keep them at a lenght outside that wall if they get in then theres only two choices for them to dislike me or even hate my entire being#or me to shove them back out without ever letting them get in#coworkers say im a nice kind person but im not its all just a facade to make my life easier and to suit myself im hateful but i dont believe#its entirely my fault after all they will to my face make fun of. laugh at. and hate everything of me they would see in other ppl that dont#hide it deep within like i do and then it rly hits me how different abnormal foul disgusting and unnatural i am#im hit with his every talk that goes on too long every word that keeps going every touch every expression every comment made on my behalf#its exhausting to live this way i fear im near my limit i havent reached it but who knows when i will#i sometimes dream of doing it and leaving behind a note wishing nothing but painful suffering to everyone i ever knew irl but i dont want to#do that to my best friends and my dog but who knows how long its left before the thread breaks#thats all like comment and subscribe if you personally would do me a favor by taking me out back and shooting me
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thinking about senet and votive again (explodes into a million shards. walks into the ocean. lays on the floor. god)
it couldnt be real. i couldnt believe it, couldnt believe in it, so i crushed it. now it's shards on the floor and all i can do is look. i can look, it's bearable to, but all the light that was once in it is gone
when senet finally gets what he wanted, when he looks back so utterly joyfully, at votive who has suffered nothing but misery. it surrouned her always, leading so many others to their demises too, because that's just what she is. there's nothing else to it, so she learned to be happy in misfortune and to find it in misery itself
and then senet came along and proved her all wrong. every hardship he beared through with her, and when when he wavered, votive (as much as she obscured her words and intent) still picked him back up, for some reason. maybe it was the community they saw in eachother.
two disgraced nobles, prince and heiress. two travelers, wearing the same masks, chatting along as they walked a path alone, as noone else would come near them. the innocent and the knowing, the pitying. the knowing one who was proved wrong in the end by someone who, entirely naively, refused to stop hoping.
and when he finally found a cure, a way out, for the entirely unknown ailment that was leading him to a slow, likely miserable death for so long, she stared in bewilderment. the most emotion she'd expressed in a long time.
it couldnt be real that he found happiness with her by his side - with her there. it couldnt be real that she had anything to do with hope and joy and happiness
so she betrayed him at the very last second. just to prove it. to prove something to them herself
votive is an omen of misfortune and misery
senet is the innocent, naive traveler who made the mistake of staying by her side
senet is the one who weathered through the storm, who hoped against all odds, until he made it out on the other side
no. senet was not the one
senet is the idiot, senet is the fool in this play, the one who made the fatal mistake of trusting her, the one who dared to challenge his puppet strings, the one who couldn't see when to possibly quit and stop trying to give affection to a mere dead mass of brambles and thorns
he's the one who won, his victory now forever scarred by a betrayal he will never understand, one that did nothing at all to change anything.
and votive is the idiot, alone, looking up and wondering where her puppet strings are
#senet#votive#fr ocs#i love them your honor. god#i hope i dont sound pretentious or some shit bc this looks so poetic damn#but i swear every line and word here has meaning#doomed fate except at what point is it fate/the narrative dooming you#and just believing that youre doomed when youre not#and therefore dooming yourself and the ones around you#how fare back does it go#how much hurt and pain was truly you and not just fate#where are your puppet strings#where is the blindfold youre so sure was over your eyes#or did you simply never dare to open them#never dared to hope#on one hand it makes sense. votive truly did think she was just a puppet of fate and eventually saw comedy in it#but at some point she had to see the hope shining through#at what point does it become willful ignorance#one on hand its a tragedy as you only opened your eyes when it was too late. on the other: fucking coward you are#for never daring to take a chance and open them even once before#for so easily resigning yourself to your fate#when you were well able to still fight#👁️🗨️👁️🗨️👁️🗨️#ash rambles#<- lemme try a new 'just me posting' tag#so ill actually tag these lmao since i cant easily get emojis on my pc
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Digimon Adventure {Franchise} + Digimon Adventure 02: The Beginning {Movie} ~ 2012!TAICHI YAGAMI & (Ramen chef)!Daisuke Motomiya Serving (as Friendly)! [+bonus Vmon!] {DigiGift! (Official Art) From HERE} {"DigiGift" was a series of official revival artworks originally released one at a time on/around the 1st of every month featuring various characters from various Digimon anime!} April 2024's calender image was the very first featuring Taichi Yagami's full design from "The Beginning" film in near-full outside of being seen in initial previewed clips of the 1st minutes of the film!
Though it's not clear if this kind of scene would take place during or after the film, one can imagine where it might be placed in context with the later story! ("The Beginning" canonically takes place in 2012; Taichi's age should be around 22~ by Kizuna, and, 23-going-on-24 by "The Beginning"'s timeline!) Daisuke, who is always listed canonically as 2~ years younger exactly with no variation, should be around 21-going-on-22!)
I NEVER WANT TO HEAR THAT DAISUKE+02 CHOSEN WOULD SERIOUSLY """KEEP HATING""" ADV CHOSEN GROUP LONGTERM + OFFICIALLY EVER AGAIN
#taisuke friendship#taichi and daisuke#2012 taichi#2012 daisuke#koushirouizumi posts#koushirouizumi advs#koushirouizumi the beginning#koushirouizumi 02#the beginning spoiler#the beginning spoilers#ambassador taichi#ramen chef daisuke#(Lead Up To It Anyway)#(YELLS I SERIOUSLY NEVER WANT TO HEAR THAT FROM ANYONE HERE EVER AGAIN IDEC IF YOU LURKED ME BEFORE +FOR 02 STUFF)#(***NEVER BRING IT UP TO ME LIKE THAT EVEN SEMI SERIOUSLY EVER AGAIN*** OR IM POINTING STRAIGHT TO THIS)#(OK BUT DIGIGIFT IS CONTINUING THIS IS GOOD I MAY GET NEW KOUSHIRO SOMEDAY----)#(I will make it rbable LATER but for now yEAH Tryin to prevent Apr 1st confusion!!!!)#({I can easily see people mistaking this one to be a new series announcement or confirmation without DigiGift context})#(wOW LOOK ITS FUTURE DAISUKE AND TAICHI HOW I ALWAYS IMAGINED THEYD BE NEAR EACH OTHER I)#(*CANT BELIEVE THEYRE FRIENDLY* A N Y W A YYYYY)#i love being right
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My doctor messaging me at 12:30 in the morning to tell me she wants to do a telehealth visit abt the side effects I'm having with my new Lamotrigine dose (including worse insomnia than my usual insomnia, as u may have guessed lmao) is. something.
#text post#like i know why i am awake babe why are YOU awake this late#and god why do we have to do another visit#they aren't bad enough to make me stop this dose and i haven't been on the new dose long enough to let it even out#can i not just Not have to do another uncomfortable visit where even if things turn out okay after#i later feel like I'm still not being wholly trusted/treated like i know my body and how i feel#i had worse side effects restarting this med months ago and we didn't have any additional visits for that#they fucking forgot to even book me for a f/u and i had to call in and beg for one basically#and then they misbooked it for the wrong reason and with the wrong doctor#and made it out like it was my fault when i made clear i begged and told the receptionist i spoke to to book said appt#that it needed to b with my doc for the Lamotrigine and that i hadn't been told when to follow up so i was just. doing it#bc she said i needed to but then didn't say when to book it#they're trying hard and im trying to give them grace but then this shit happens and like#im tired. makes me want to go into my new doc like nah never mind im fine. don't ask me nothing and i won't bug you with anything#unless im dying or nearly dead already.#would suck beyond believe attempting to raw dog life mostly again but goddamn. im so sick of this lack of stability with my care#anyway. probably an appt next Tuesday which is great#that's the week of the weekend that i work again and the week before my bday#(a bday I'll be working now which I'm not normally irked abt but. i am a bit rn)#so cool. yeah. let's stack anxiety and fear over a medical appt on top of everything else for that week#and that's not counting that this weekend I've been tasked with buying and getting signed a v expensive and rare figure#for my mum's bf and I'm kind of terrified im gonna fuck it up#he paid for tickets to the con the figure will be sold at and that the person he wants to sign it will be at#so if i fuck this up he'll want (understandably) to be paid back asap for that#and that's money i don't fucking have rn#i really wish she had waited till the actual day proper to contact me bc i couldn't sleep before this#and now i definitely cant bc like#it's dumb. but what if she takes my med away. it isn't perfect but it works better than any other med I've tried#what if she wants me to try a new one. i cant do that and b dealing with major side effects during the intense work schedule#that'll be happening for me v soon and then into November
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Chapters: 2/2 Fandom: Marvel, The Incredible Hulk (Comics) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Bruce Banner, or his body anyway, Joe Fixit Additional Tags: Crack, Minor Injuries, umm, Implied Non-Consensual Body Modification, but it doesn't actually happen, Baby's first ao3 post Summary:
Joe makes a gofundme. Set around the time of Immortal Hulk #22 (you know, when joe says trans rights).
Yes my loyal fans I have made a chapter 2 to Joe Fixit’s GoFundMe (Joe cancels the GoFundMe after getting his Hulk body back)
#joe fixit#immortal hulk#i cant believe i posted it over 2 years ago#now i kind of have mixed feelings on part 1. rick jones is the guy who knows john mulaney btw (assuming before the leader gets to him)#oops i maybe never posted the first chapter on here. well i wrote it and now i wrote a second one
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