#can you tell i’m projecting onto my kins

[nihildenial]

"Fifty Shades of Pink" a Papa Emeritus III x Omega fic

SMUT UNDER CUT

one chapter ; wc: 6,586

There wasn’t much that could surprise Omega anymore. He’s been topside for about six years now, served as rhythm guitarist for three Papas, and performed countless ritual performances.

This, however, was something new.

“Isn’t it perfecto ?” The short man in front of him throws his arms wide and does a slow spin.

Omega simply blinks his lavender eyes and tries his best to think of a way to put what he’s thinking into nice-enough words. Why the hell did he agree to go to the cobbler to pick up the Terzo’s loafers and leave his kin with the man? “It’s…tailored nicely.”

Terzo Emeritus, Papa Emeritus III, a forty-three year old, pouts like an affronted child. He turns back to the large floor length mirror and takes in his appearance from the tailors’ platform. “I think I look like I belong in one of those fancy Ivy League college fraternities! Alpha told me pink was my color. Imagine a beer in my hand.”

Omega should fuck him in this cove more often.

“You took advice from Alpha? The Ghoul who still puts on different colored socks because he’s too lazy to find a pair from his dresser?”

The raven-haired man huffs, “You were too busy with Francesco! Maybe if you weren’t such a bossy-pants, you would have been here. I think I’ll keep it like this just to show you that I do look handsome.”

Omega sets down the several pairs of ties and socks on the vacant chair next to the platform. Of course his kin would disappear when someone had to tell Terzo he looked like a bottle of pepto-bismol. “I didn’t say you weren’t handsome. It’s tailored well to your figure. The color on the other hand…”

“Pink is the new black! Slimming for the masculine shape, and feminine to complement the olive tone of my sun-kissed Italian tan.”

The large Quintessence Ghoul sighs, “Just humor me and try the gold that we originally agreed on.”

“No!” Terzo steps off the platform, losing the extra inches of height. “I like this. We’re going to check out and go back to the Ministry.”

“You look like a child dressed for church.” He could pick the small man up with one hand and shake him like a naughty toddler.

Terzo flips a loose bang out of his eyes, “I’ll let you be the first to take it off me.”

Omega holds back a grumble, “What is the horrible pink shirt for anyway? You’re still getting the white suit, right?”

“Of course, I’m getting the white suit! This is for a new music video; Sister Imperator finally said the budget was thick enough to shoot it,” His fingers make sure the Grucifix cufflinks are facing the same direction, leading Omega and his purchases to the Ralph Lauren counter.

“Mr. Emeritus, I see the tailor was able to make those adjustments for you.” The woman flashes a polite smile.

Omega sees it falter a bit as he feels his four kin reappear at his side. Of course, Alpha has damn pink socks. “We are not getting pink socks too.”

Alpha puts the offending socks on top of Omega’s well-chosen accessories. “He looks good in pink.”

“I’m buying the damn socks, Omega,” Terzo affirms and lets the woman take all the items to begin scanning.

Omega could be petty and not hand over the Ministry credit card, but Terzo strikes him with a look that promises a reward for being good. “Fine,” He grumbles and nudges Alpha out of the way so he can sign the receipt. The woman hands back the large items in several bags and the five glamoured hellbeasts follow their leader out onto the busy 5th Avenue streets. Glamouring all of them, they walk undisturbed down the block to where a sleek SUV idles.

“That’s what you spent all that time getting fitted for?” Is the first thing out of Sister Imperator’s mouth when they all pile into the car. A bag of clothing for some of the Sisters of Sin sits by her feet in the passenger seat.

Omega sits directly behind her, letting her take in Terzo in the driver side middle seat. “I said the same thing.”

“We like it, Papa,” Pebble chirps from the third row, “All of us back here do.”

Alpha and Mist nod.

All eyes turn to Zephyr, who is unfortunately stuck sitting between Omega and Terzo. “I mean…Papa can make anything look fetching.”

Terzo claps a hand on the air Ghoul’s shoulder, “Majority rules! Now, let us get back to the Abbey so I can make sure the equipment is ready for shooting tomorrow.”

Sister Imperator pinches the bridge of her nose, but nods for the Brother of Blasphemy to go ahead and drive away.

“I made sure we got the white suit, at least,” Omega watches the bustling city slowly crawl past them in traffic.

“I knew I could count on you, Omega,” She says, reaching back and patting the Ghoul’s knee.

—

For the music video of He Is , the Ghouls weren’t needed as actors or instrumentalists, so Terzo gave them all the day off–except for Omega.

“Your punishment for yesterday is that you get to spend the day with us as we shoot.” It’s like four in the morning so they could get the shots down at the river around mid afternoon.

He wants to whine like a Ghoul kit. “They’re going hunting! Deer season just began!”

“Maybe I’ll take pity on you after the lunch break,” Terzo chides with a wink, “Now sit in your chair and be good for Papa. You can be my waterboy.”

Omega would do most anything for him. Sitting and zoning out while his beautiful Papa twirls his dramatic ass around a sound stage may sound like a relaxing afternoon, but his kin are out frolicking among the large forest and hunting.

Terzo stands on his tip-toes to presumably kiss Omega, but the antipope simply smacks his lips a hair’s breadth away and bounds out of the Ghoul’s arms.

That motherfucker, Omega sits back in the shitty makeup-chair with a huff.

Sister Rebecca raises a beauty blender. Her brown eyes are bright as she’s nearly bouncing in place/ “Could I try something on you? I got a new, thinner foundation to use for you and the Ghouls in an upcoming photoshoot.”

He sees how hopeful she is. She wasn’t chosen by Sister Imperator to be in the music video because of her skills at makeup. Both of them were stuck watching this anyway.

Omega reaches up and undoes his mask. “Knock yourself out. Don’t be offended if I fall asleep.”

“I also have some head massage techniques I could try out…?” She grins.

Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad.

A few hours pass with Omega submitting to anything Sister Rebecca wanted.

The new foundation she got did make his hell-soot colored skin more luminous, and flattened some pores that he’s been a bit self-conscious of. She smudged some eyeliner here, a small dusting of brightening powder on his eyelids, and something moisturizing that tastes like cherries on his lips.

Omega can’t help the happy rumble when her manicured hands reward him with a truly sinful scalp massage. Thankfully it isn’t loud enough to disrupt the filming across the room, but Sister Imperator does shoot them a glare that sobers both of them up enough to stop.

“That’s a wrap!” Comes the director’s call.

“This was really helpful, Omega, thank you.” The sister begins to put away most of the new makeup. She leaves out Terzo’s papal paint in case he needs to reapply during any of the recording.

He looks at himself in the mirror, “I feel good in this. Much better than the grease paint of the last tour.”

She huffs a laugh, “Yeah, that stuff was disgusting to work with and have on. Here’s some wipes to take it off.”

Omega takes in the nearly flawless quality of his charcoal skin, “Actually, I might keep it on for a bit. See how it wears.”

“Of course, I’ll leave those here,” She rolls the makeup suitcase with her as she follows the production crew towards the Abbey sanctuary.

In the mirror he can see the reflection of Terzo talking to the two young children that were in the video. Their father was an archbishop from the Salem Ministry, and was one of the only clergy members with young enough twin children.

Terzo was always so great with people. It breaks Omega’s heart that he and his kin hold the man’s love and there’s little chance for mini-Terzos to come into being.

“ Grazie, miei dolci bambini ,” The antipope pats their heads, eliciting delighted laughs as the boy and girl toddle over to their watchful father and mother. He struts to Omega, taking a long swig from the water bottle Omega was tasked with keeping. “Wasn’t I absolutely sinful?”

The Quintessence Ghoul inclines his head, “There’s hardly been a time when you’re not. It was good to see those kids so happy.”

“ Sono una famiglia adorabile , quite the lovely little family, no?” Terzo smiles. He steps forward to peer around Omega’s back.

“What do you think? I let Sister Rebecca experiment with some new shit,” He turns fully to face the antipope. He relishes the shocked flush that crawls through the cracks of Terzo’s papal paint.

For once the man is rendered speechless. His mouth opens and closes like one of the fish Pebble caught the other day in the Abbey lake. “I…”

Omega sees his chance to get some payback, “I think I should let her do this more often, yes?” He makes sure most of the room has cleared (mostly just making sure Imperator is gone) and uses his larger form to back Terzo against the vanity counter. He lets his hands rest on those beautifully familiar and full hips and leans down.

Terzo takes the bait and sighs happily into their shared breath–except Omega smacks his lips together and pulls back before their lips could meet. “It���s a shame, really. My lip balm is cherry-flavored."

The shorter man’s mismatched green and white eyes fly open in betrayal, “You motherfucker!”

Omega folds up the vanity chair and saunters to the doorway, “I might take pity on you after lunch.” He grins at the imaginary lasers shooting him in the back.

—

Terzo and Omega have always been this way. One of them does something immature to the other, then other retaliates, then they make up by the fucking the absolute shit out of each other. It’s very much a game of cat and mouse or freeze-tag, making the four other Ghouls roll their eyes when an argument inevitably happens.

Terzo’s a little shit.

Omega’s a little shit in the form of a 6 ft 7 Quintessence Ghoul.

Nothing is better than the angry-eventually-loving makeup sex. Tonight was going to be quite a treat judging by the horny mini-glares Terzo gives him between shots of the He Is sanctuary scenes. Omega sits out of the way in his vanity chair and snacks on popcorn provided on the shooting table.

After another two hours of getting footage, the director calls for lunch. They’ll resume in another hour to begin the footage down by the river.

Omega doesn’t know necessarily what they’re going to shoot down there. But he hopes Mist is ripping into the throat of a deer on the banks and ruins their shot so he and Terzo can go fuck.

Speaking of, they do have an hour before resuming…

Terzo is engulfed in a mass of followers and Siblings. He drinks their attention as if he needs it to continue existing. He flashes that sharp smile that’s all shiny, white, perfect teeth and it makes Omega’s black heart do somersaults.

He likes to think that he controls the Antipope, but Terzo is a feral hellbeast in his own way. Even if Omega holds the man facedown against the mattress more times than Terzo rides him, Omega would fold faster to the man’s orders than the other way around.

The crowd moves towards the Dining Hall across the cloister courtyard, carrying Terzo with them. He doesn’t even spare the Ghoul a glance as the group filters outside.

Omega holds back a growl. So that’s how it’s going to be.

Lunch flys by. Omega tears into a pack of beef jerky and one of Pebble’s edibles. If he got upset, then he can go fuck off. Omega’s horny as shit and being forced to be a waterboy for a frustratingly beautiful and petty man while Pebble got to sink his fangs into a tender deer flank.

By the time they resume filming at the hill that leads to the Wallkill river, Pebble’s edible has kicked in and relaxed him some. Which is good because his anger shoots back up as Terzo steps out into the mid-afternoon sun in that damned pink shirt under a white waistcoat.

He looks like a douchebag actor in an American frat movie! Paired with black aviator sunglasses, it screams the wrong kind of self-assertion. But then again, Omega hasn’t really thought about what He Is is about…and it begins to make sense as they start filming.

So, he’s been an asshole for no reason. The song is a parody of Christian baptism rock. Guilt rises in Omega’s chest. How many times has he performed this damned song and not understood what it meant?

The Quintessence Ghoul watches the group film shots of a handful of Sisters of Sin frolic in the meadow that covers the path down to the riverbank. Their flowing white dresses and long hair twirl in the gentle breeze.

It is a nice day. Omega turns his face towards the sun and feels how the foundation moves on his cheeks. He’ll never get tired of being out in the topside sun. The heat from the planet is a pleasant warmth compared to the spikes of fire from the Pits.

He hears water splash. Down at the edge of the grass, Terzo is wading into the water, while in that stupid outfit.

Part of Omega’s brain purrs in happiness knowing the brackish water will destroy the offending shirt but also–What the Hell is he doing? That outfit alone cost nearly $3,000, and they bought it just yesterday!

Despite the conflict within Omega, he ultimately decides to sit still. He’ll give Terzo a reprimand after he’s done being a destructive little shit. So he sits, watching the Sisters remove their sandals and wade in a bit aways from Terzo.

All of them are only waist-deep. Are they going to do some sort of synchronized swimming routine? Omega doesn’t remember Terzo being very good at keeping afloat just by himself.

To Omega’s disbelief, the first Sister wades to Terzo and he takes her hands in his right, cradling her against his chest. Her blonde curls flare in the wind coming off the water.

Terzo’s free hand comes up to rest at the back of her skull and he dips her back into the water.

Her perfectly tan hand slides up to his jaw, a teasing thumb brushing against the black paint of his upper lip.

Terzo submerges her entirely then helps her upright, the water rushing from her plump form. Her white choir robe clings to her now stiffly peaked nipples. His hand that held her stomach sneakily cups her right breast during the sloshing of the cold river water.

Omega wouldn’t typically be that upset; he’s always up for a third (or fourth, fifth, and so on) to join him and the Antipope. The Sister is extremely beautiful and has always been kind to the Ghouls, but this bastardization of a water baptism taking place in front of Omega after Terzo was being so fucking petty, absolutely makes Omega’s pointed ears burn with jealousy.

One by one, the baptism continues five more times. Each one has some naughty tease between Terzo and the Sister: the next one gasps out a moan at the cold water when she comes up, the third one unbuttons the infuriatingly pink top button of his shirt, and the fourth Sister’s breasts are basically exposed through the now-soaked white robe.

The fifth woman is more bold than the rest. When the brunette cuddles into Terzo’s baptismal embrace, her hand follows the same path as those before her–up to cup the blurred edge of his papal paint on Terzo’s jaw. He leans her back and submerges her.

She’s guided back up with Terzo’s steady hands (hands that are usually gripping Omega’s white hair as the Ghoul fucks the Hell out of him) and as she lets the face drip from her face, she leans forward and catches his lips.

Terzo doesn’t hesitate to deepen it.

And on the far shore, four unglamoured Ghouls howl with the victory of a fresh kill. It echoes so loudly that it creates ripples on the mostly-calm river.

Omega’s Hell-beast blood boils.

He leaps up from his chair and stomps past the production crew and down to the water’s edge. He ignores the sound of the crew frantically packing up as the scent of ozone fills every molecule of the air by the riverbank.

“ Get the fuck off her !” Omega thunders in Ghoulish.

The Sister squeaks and pulls out of Terzo’s arms so fast she falls onto her ass in the water.

Terzo goes to help her up but Omega leaps from the bank and slams into the raven-haired man.

They collide and go underwater, Terzo’s hands grappling the front of Omega’s vestments as they resurface. The Antipope’s aviators are missing and he goes to search for them but Omega pulls him away from the shore.

“ You make me sit here all day, tease me, and now you decide to snog a Sister during a fake baptism, in front of all these strangers?!” Omega growls as he bodily drags the now fully soaked Antipope to a mostly-submerged cove just out of sight. He tosses Terzo onto the small silver of a rocky beach, making sure it’s enough to bruise, but not actually hurt him.

Terzo spits out some brackish water to the side. His face is equal parts cocky and affronted, but the smirk on his ruined makeup grows as he takes in the Quintessence Ghoul’s burning eartips and heavy rut scent. “It was Sister Imperator’s idea-”

“ I know it fucking wasn’t. You’re just a whore.”

Terzo reclines on the beach as if he wasn’t just dragged through the water like a piece of lumber, “I never took you for a jealous teenage Ghoul.”

Omega snarls, frustration only building at the man’s continued sass. Doesn’t he know what danger he’s in? He trudges through the water and lets his glamour fully fall. He feels his horns reappear and his sleeves bulge as they barely contain the soot-black muscles Omega crafted over centuries as champion in the fighting Pits.

Instead of flinching, Terzo’s erection hardens in his wet trousers. “ Un ragazzo così grande …”

That tone immediately dismisses part of Omega’s fury. There’s appreciation and lust wrapped up in that sentence. How is he supposed to stay angry when Terzo becomes so riled up when he’s in his most authentic form?

“I’m still angry ,” The Ghoul says.

Terzo slicks back his sopping bangs, “I would hope so. I’ve been so naughty I deserve a punishment; merito una sculacciata . A good spanking would make me repent.”

Omega reaches forward and slices through the white vest and pink shirt with a long claw.

“Hey! Fuck you, we just bought this! I could have gotten the salt out of it.”

“You’ve been sitting in brackish water for the past two hours and now you’re upset?” Omega rips the offending material from the man’s body to float off in the water around them. “If anything, this is simply payback. I don’t think I should even touch you. I should leave you here to trudge back to shore; water-logged, naked, and messy-faced.”

Terzo play-struggles as Omega grips his chin tight enough for his claws to press in. The Quintessence Ghoul sees his mismatched eyes roll with pleasure.

“ Filthy .”

“The correct word is-” Terzo’s shit-eating grin grows.

Omega has him on his stomach in the next blink, claws raking down the man’s legs to shred the white trousers. He relishes the red scratches that follow his claws. “Shut the fuck up.”

Terzo lets out a groan and his hands grasp for purchase on the slippery rocks. “ Omega …oh, how you spoil your Papa.”

“Right now, you’re nothing more than my bitch.” Omega has to re-glamour his hands so he can pry apart Terzo’s slippery thighs. When the infuriating man wiggles his ass out of Omega’s grip, the Ghoul smacks the pert right cheek.

Terzo’s echoing gasp is beautiful. Water sloshes over him and pools in the hip dimples above his ass.

-

Terzo makes Omega carry him back to shore after a rough fuck in the cove. Indulging the man who did make him cum so hard his vision whited out isn’t the thing he has issue with. Staking a claim on Terzo has only partially satisfied him.

The shreds of the blasted pink shirt swirl in his wake as Omega trudges back to shore. As the Quintessence Ghoul walks back to the Abbey at the top of the hill, Terzo lounges in the strong arms.

Terzo idly plays with the black chest hair brushing against his cheek as Omega walks. “Why don’t you like me in pink again?”

“You’re better suited to richer tones.”

“Do you think purple is ugly on me as well?”

Omega rolls his eyes and sets Terzo on his feet as they reach the Abbey’s doors. “Of course not.”

“I would like a reason, per favore ,” Terzo ignores Omega holding open the doors for him.

“You simply look better in colors other than pink. Even going a shade darker like magenta would bring out the warm undertone in your skin.” Omega takes the human’s forearm and turns it over, tracing a claw over the thrumming veins below the skin.

Terzo blinks, “So you aren’t just doing this to spite me.”

Omega’s thick eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Spite you? For what?”

“Because I had the other Ghouls come with me to the fitting and had you come later,” Terzo admits sheepishly.

“I don’t care about that shit.”

Terzo hums, “So…you tackling me and pounding me into the rocks of a cave wasn’t a consequence of your jealousy from earlier this week?”

Omega takes a deep breath. “No. It’s because…I was jealous of the Sisters in the music video. How they got to hold you, how tender you were while you gave them an unholy baptism, all while wearing the shirt you knew I disliked…I want to feel like you hear my opinion.”

“Oh.” Is all Terzo can say. His face flushes in realization. “I probably was a bit mean and the gold was pretty… Mi dispiace .” He hugs Omega around the middle.

Omega sighs and pets the damp raven hair, “You’re too cute to stay upset with.”

“I promise to make it up to you,” Terzo’s smile is innocent but filled with the promise of something naughty.

The large Ghoul watches the naked antipope saunter inside without a care in the world. He passes a wary Sister Imperator and Cardinal Copia talking in the foyer without a second glance.

-

While the music video was in the editing phase, Sister Imperator called the band together to record ‘He Is.’ It only took a few times to get a good enough recording, and Sister rewarded them with a few days off.

Before Omega could even grasp the fact that he only had a few cleaning chores for the next two days, Terzo was rushing out of the studio room. Rolling his eyes, Omega reracks his guitar and chats with the producer about if there was anything he needed to drag Terzo back to fix.

“So, ‘Mega…want to come hunting with us?” Pebble’s tiny form pops up from behind the drum kit.

He thinks it over. He could go track down Terzo but potentially get turned away for the man to have a nap, or join his kin for the night. “Hunting sounds good.”

Pebble’s fanged grin is infectious. “Awesome! You missed out on Mist taking down a deer twice her size! It was so cool.” The two ghouls walk from the studio out into the courtyard where the other three Ghouls are stripping their clothes to hand to one of the sisters tasked with laundry.

“No more blood stains on these, please. It was impossible after yesterday’s hunt,” Sister Anais held out the basket already filled with Alpha and Zephyr’s uniforms. Mist is taking her time undoing her boots.

Omega easily undoes the buttons of his cassock.

“Now, you boys are going to be careful out there tonight, yes? The game Warden said there’s an excess of about thirty deer this season,” She says, nodding as all of them finish placing their clothes in her basket.

“Including the ones from yesterday?” Zephyr’s gray eyes brighten.

“No. New total based on the herds movement today. I’ll tell Papa all of you are leaving.”

Omega and his pack scamper through the courtyard (always careful of Primo’s topiaries) and out the gates to the hill that holds the forest on one side and the meadow that leads to the riverbank on the other. Once out of view from any Siblings, all of them let their Earthly glamours slip away.

Omega’s muscles have been crying out for him to move for a few days now. Even his hot tryst with Terzo in the cove wasn’t enough to fully drain all of his infernal adrenaline. He senses how the forest is filled with potential dinner, a group of deer only a mile away.

He drops to all fours and bounds away, leaving his mates to hopelessly beat him to the first kill.

Not many things were better than this.

-

It’s near midnight when the five Ghouls waddle back to the Abbey with bellies full of rabbit, fox, and deer. Thankfully they were able to stop before they hit the target overpopulated numbers. There’d be another night of hunting in a week or so.

Omega drops his body onto the Ghoul common room couch. He could sleep for a month, but then he’d miss Samhain and Terzo’s birthday.

Mist plops into the armchair by his head. “Those rabbits were so tender…” She purrs happily.

“My fox was delicious. I probably absorbed his wit and cunning.” Pebble maneuvers her so he can curl up with her.

There’s a collective eye roll from the pack.

“We’ll see if you stick a fork in the toaster again!” Alpha calls, snickering.

Omega closes his eyes as the pack continues to roast each other. He’s on the edge of falling asleep when footsteps come from the stairs down into the crypt that holds the Ghoul den. He cracks an eye open, seeing the common room is empty of his pack. He must have dozed for a bit longer than he thought.

The Quintessence Ghoul smells the air and relaxes as the scent of Maison Margiela’s Jazz Club fills his senses. “Terzo,” He says to the newcomer.

Terzo is dressed in a loose black t-shirt and baggy gray sweatpants. His face is empty of skull paint. “I was wondering if you were going to leave your poor Papa all alone in bed tonight,” He says innocently. His bare feet are barely audible as he steps up to the couch, tracing a finger down Omega’s strong nose.

“Sorry, we got back maybe an hour ago and I dozed off.”

“Va abbastanza bene , Omega. At least, it would be alright… if I got some special attention.”

Omega pulls the man’s hips until he’s straddling the Ghoul on the couch.

Terzo tsks, “Not here.”

“Then where?” Omega asks.

“My rooms, please.”

Omega exhales and lifts the man back to his feet. “You should’ve just called me to come upstairs.”

“I did. You didn’t pick up.” Terzo pulls out his iPhone. Sure enough, Omega missed three calls and three texts from him.

Shit. Time to turn on the romantic gestures. Omega picks up Terzo easily in his arms, one wrapped securely under his knees and behind his back. He regales Terzo with how the hunt went as they ascend the stairs and make it to the man’s papal suite.

Terzo locks the door and turns to Omega with a coy smirk. “Now, before we start anything, I did get you a surprise.”

Omega puts his slippers by the end of the bed. “Hmm, what for?” He asks, suspicious.

“Well you still believe I don’t look good in pink–”

“Terzo, are you seriously still thinking about that?” Omega gives him a pleading look. “I’m sorry I said that.”

Terzo nods, “Yes, yes; I forgive you for all that shit. Anyways…I thought I would show you that I do in fact look good in pink.” His hands take their time moving to the hem of the shirt he stole from Omega, then pull the garment up and over his head to toss carelessly on the floor.

Hidden by the bagginess of the shirt is a baby pink, sheer lace bralette embroidered with cherries and soft ruffles. Terzo doesn’t have a lot of area to be placed in a bralette, but the sheerness makes the illusion that he’s filling it out just a bit.

Terzo’s smirk grows as he hooks his thumbs into the waistband of his sweatpants.

Omega’s eyes are glued to the slow reveal of skin and matching pink lace hemline that appears as the sweatpants pool at the human’s ankles.

The front panel of the panties are the same pattern as the bralette cups. It leaves nothing to imagination as the leaky tip of Terzo’s cock just sticks out over the panty hemline. The soft looking ruffles continue over the high cut expanse of Terzo’s thighs to disappear to probably cup his ass perfectly.

“So what do you think?” Terzo turns in a circle, and Omega feels his blood drain to his cock.

He was correct about the ruffles. Omega is dumb with memorizing the sinful sight in front of him. “Oh..”

Terzo gently lifts his head by the chin, tearing Omega’s lavender eyes from roving over his body. He uses his leverage to move Omega backwards until the Ghoul’s knees hit the bed. Omega drops back to the bed, stuck in Terzo’s laser-focused gaze.

“Now, il mio gatto cattivo , no claws are allowed to rip this delicate outfit,” Terzo coos, easily lifting himself to straddle the Ghoul’s wide chest. “Premium Italian lace…Rip even a single stitch and you’ll be forced to watch your brethren have their way with me."

Omega snorts, cockiness rearing up at the demand even if he’s clearly losing the battle. “That’s still pretty hot.”

“Oh, did I forget to mention that you would be strapped to that lovely St. Andrew’s Cross?”

Omega gulps and his claws shift to human fingers.

“That’s what I thought. Now touch me,” Terzo says sweetly, taking the Ghoul’s hands to rest on the cups of the bralette. “A few more spoonfuls of Nutella and I’ll fill these, probably. Copia’s been making too much carbonara recently.”

“I would still love you either way,” Omega’s hand cups the back of his neck and pulls the man down to seal their lips together.

Terzo’s voice is pitched with arousal and fondness. “Sap.”

Omega’s left hand slides over the pink lace of his sides and down to grab a handful of Terzo’s ass. According to his fingertips, it’s a thin thong in the back, the crotch band barely holding a glass plug inside him. Omega’s finger stretches the fabric and he snaps the thin waistband against the smooth side of the plug’s base.

Terzo yelps, “Watch it, asshole! That could’ve come apart!”

Omega shrugs and does it again. “Seems fine to me.” He presses a finger against the plug and forces it as deep as it can go without getting completely swallowed.

Terzo’s hole resists, turning it into a game that leaves him flushing as pink as his lingerie.

“Didn’t stretch all the way for this, huh?” Omega coos to the human.

“I like it when it burns at first,” Terzo says, even if both of them already know it.

Omega grasps the end of the plug and pulls it out in one smooth motion. He lets it roll from his hand to somewhere on the duvet of Terzo’s bed. They’ll deal with it after Terzo’s cock-dumb and knotted.

Terzo is pressing a tube of lube into the hand wrapped around his ass.

“When did you grab that?” Omega pops open the cap easily and spreads a good amount inside the human with invading fingers.

“I had it in the left cup,” He moans when Omega presses against his prostate.

Of course, the bralette cup Omega didn’t feel up. “Sneaky bastard ,” The Ghoul growls. He tosses the lube in the same direction as the glass butt plug. He lifts his hips and slides down the boxers he put on after getting back from the hunt. His cock springs to attention from its confines, the tapered tip slapping against the beginning swell of Terzo’s ass. It doesn’t take much maneuvering for Omega’s head to find Terzo’s hole and push in.

Terzo’s answering moan vibrates through Omega’s chest where the man’s immaculate fingernails dig into his pecs. The Ghoul didn’t notice the coating of nude pink on Terzo’s nails. That wasn’t there earlier…was it?

Nothing else matters as Omega pushes himself inside all the way to the hilt. He feels Terzo’s ass resist him near the end but a carefully placed kiss to the human’s neck makes him relax easier.

“I bought this…so we could fuck and keep it on…” Terzo pants into Omega’s hair.

“So thoughtful,” Omega sighs happily. His hands shift to cup an asscheek in each, forcing Terzo’s center of gravity over his face and leaning on his hands on either side of Omega’s ears. It puts the cherry-embroidered bralette cups right in his face. He cranes his neck and sucks at a nipple through the lace.

Terzo squirms at the first few slow thrusts, trying to frustrate Omega enough that he’ll speed up without any begging.

“You’re so beautiful in this,” Omega fucks up into him deeper. He’s so slick and warm and perfectly fluttering against the ribbed sides of his engorged cock. Every steadily increasing speedy thrust makes Terzo moan like a whore.

As wonderful a feeling as all of this is, Terzo is far from his twink past where he could bounce on a cock for hours at a time. His knees are older and are already starting to ache. “‘Mega…”

The Ghoul presses a kiss to his cheek to show there’s no hard feelings, and lets the human sit upright. Terzo carefully eases himself off Omega and makes himself comfortable against the pillows, blow-dried bangs fanning out around his unpainted face.

Omega turns onto his stomach to cage the human in between his arms. Terzo kisses him as he lines his cock back up to his entrance, swallowing their shared moans. Omega does his best to stay attached at the lips, but he’s craving to watch Terzo’s lace-covered body writhe under him.

The lace is a more saturated pink than the stupid shirt. It complements the dusty rose of his nipples and the neat, salt-and-pepper hair that is smattered around the human’s sternum. It also fits well against the darkening red of his cock. The head strains against the thin silk waistband of the thong, the lace sticky and glistening as each thrust forces out another small spurt of pre-cum.

Omega wraps a hand around the lace covered cock and shifts the fabric over it. It moves the human’s foreskin and jolts Terzo into awareness at what he’s doing. “So much for talking about me ruining the lace…”

Terzo whines as Omega times the tight strokes with each rolling thrust. There isn’t much movement he can do with the panties, but it’s enough to send Terzo over the edge. His cock gets caught under the hem and his cum shoots from behind one of the cherry motifs, sticking the front gusset to his cock. He shivers in pleasure.

Omega doesn’t slow down. He knows his human isn’t satisfied with just one. He continues the steady pace, changing angle gradually to now rub a nodule on his cock against his prostate with every movement. Terzo shudders in overstimulation, his ass clenching against the invading cock. His nails dig into the short white hairs at the nape of Omega’s neck.

It all burns so good.

“I love…our little games,” Terzo breathes into the space between their lips. His mismatched eyes are lidded heavily, “You get so defensive…yet are always so ready to defend my honor. Fuck, right there, please…”

Omega places a flat hand on Terzo’s solar plexus and sits up straighter to thrust straight inside him.

Instantly, Terzo’s moans morph into punched-out whimpers. Omega’s fingers grasp the bralette to stretch it down to below his nipples. It acts as a leash to move Terzo in time with each roll of his hips.

“‘Mega…” Terzo whines, “Please, please…”

“Please, what? Gotta use your words, sweetheart.” The Quintessence Ghoul can feel the beginning swell of his knot. It’s starting to keep him from sliding all the way inside Terzo. He uses his momentum to pop in the swell and it makes Terzo explode with an orgasm again. This time, the cum reaches the edge of the bralette and Omega’s hand.

“O-oh, fuck!” The human cranes his neck to look down as he feels the knot forming.

Omega sweet talks him as he pushes the knot inside with each thrust until it’s formed enough that it would tear the human to push back out.

Nothing compares to this moment; Terzo’s musical whines in his ears, the mottled red blush of his chest underneath the cherries and pink lace, the gloopy pools of his cum from his two orgasms collecting in the thong and bralette waistbands.

“You want it, Terzo?” He can’t resist teasing him as he writhes. He can’t hold himself back, but it enhances the experience to hear the words from the man.

“Y-Yes! Please, ‘Mega!” The human yelps, helpless as a third orgasm overtakes him at the same time as he’s pushed full of Ghoul knot and a river of cum. A small indent forms as Omega floods him with enough release to knock up any Ghoul, female presenting or not.

It’s probably a good thing that Terzo’s the one taking knots and not Mist.

Terzo’s slumps against the fluffy pillows with a fluttering heartbeat. He lets silence fill the spaces between their panting breaths. “You ruin me for everyone else,” Terzo says quietly once they’re locked together and calmed for a moment. “At the tailor’s I agreed with you; that shirt was ugly. It didn’t match my undertone. Gold was a much better choice.”

Omega buries his head in the human’s hair so he can laugh, hiking up his hips so the angle of penetration doesn’t hurt his hips. They’ll be stuck together for a while. “You’re such an asshole.”

“And you love both my personality and asshole, il mio adorabile demone .”

[theuniverseawakens347]

okay so we leave one sectour together… Chloe and hailey

… ya go into the next… ur given options to do x y n z… ya DECIDED WHO TAKES WHAT PLATE N HOW MUCH YA WILLINGLY TO DO

Chloe: well I like sex so I’ll do that BIG FAN of Beyoncé she’s there more…

Halle: well I believe in starseeds spiritual over god so I’ll do this one…

ya go two two different rooms … to different times before ur final destination until you get uncomfortable and want to turn back.. so they put you in a room of what feels watered down from where you just came but it’s masked w the same sin .. devils red dress.. now you in that sector and realizing … this don’t feel right… ima go chat to the top dawgs,.. but my fan base my money my idols what will they think.. I WANA fit Ina me have a fan base… I don’t wan be a Kesha I don’t WANA be Amanda bynes or Brittney… I WANA keep my money w my control … well Chloe you never had control over it … bank n loans., checks n balances ..,

ur name alone is a business ur mom is ur house but she got bankrupt when ya came to America … NOT ALL WILLINGLY SOME STOLEN.. damn dash to JAYZ and JAYZ to 50 cent back.. ya hold heads educate those lost souls… but ya know which ones GOT TRUE INTENT TO MAKE AND DO BETTER AND NOT AVOID DEATH ROW.. or crimes oushed onto someone else .. like Lee garlington been harassing my family since she was 10 .. her mom step mom family friends to my elders.., they passed AND FUCKING HER FAMILY UP IN THE SPIRITUAL WORLD… OTHER DEMINSIONS..

I’m trying to give you grace n dignity here WITH ME… but ya won sneak diss and torture your soul and blame me…

as a creator “ we are made in the reflection of god” … whatever that Bible versus is.. some are starting to see the BIBLE GAVE A SKELETON FOR A SANDWHICH AND YA DRESSD IT HOW YA DEEMED FIT .. you got options of toppings to try you thru away the lettuce and veggies bc “ too healthy” so you choose heavy meats all the time and carbs…n juice…

UR PLAYING GOD IN UR OWN LIFE.. YES… FREE WILL TO BE BETTER N DO BETTER…, GODS WILL STEPS IN WHEN YA NEED A REDIRECTION.. QUESTIONING UR SOUL NEW DOOR APPEARS… YOU EITHER WALK THRU IT AND SEE WHATS ON THE OTHER SIDE… OR YA KEEP ON THE SAME MISERY ROAD …road map for visual learners… I’m leaving missing pieces of purposes … metaphors symbolizism.. analogies… same thing LIFE IS A REFLECTION OF MY BUTAINED BRAINED.. I MADE AN OVER VIEW OPTIONS TO SEE US THRU… how can we trust it …MY FAMILY FROM MY SOUL HAVE ALWAYS GOT ME until some unknown walks in and even then THEY STILL WORK BEHIND THE SCENSE…

ur lesson when you walked away from good and chose bad ( god to Satan fallen angels.. U GET PUNISHED)

TRUST THE UNIVERSE ITS GOT YOU.. UR INTENTION IS TO TRUELY BE BETTER UR TAKEN CARE OF … THERES ANOTHER SIDE OF THE TAPE FRANK OCEAN CAYENDA? A AND B… but you stopped that trac waiting for me… something if life or record label.. or maybe you made it but it ended being another project.. you did or didn’t like kehlani to music woke Interview ..

AND THOSE RUNNING FROM MURDER FREESTYLE RATSHIT MIC…. THATS ALL YOU DOING .. YOU RUNNING DROM UR VICTIMS AND SCARED CUZ IM SPEAKING WHAT YA GRANDMA USED TO TELL YOU … N. C EAZYIINK LLC JUSTIN OF LONDON BEING GREEDY FOR KONEY CAUSE YA LIVED IN WHAT YOU DEEMED FILTH LISTENING TO the WRONG SOUL.. YA KILLED MY FAMILY UR “friends” AND UR KIN.. U ORGANIZE CRIME FOR EVIL MALICIOUS INTENT… YOU CAME IN W WANTING BETTER HALLE BAILEY.. AND GOT TO THE POINT OF FUCK IT THIS IS COOL I CAN GET AWAY W WRONG.. ALSO SPIRITUAL LAW… MY TEAM CAN READ BETWEEN UR BARS TO SEE WHO YOU SET UP FOR MURDER AND HOW YOU DID IT … THATS A DIFFERENT SECTOR FOR MY HIGHER FAMILY FOR THOSE JUSTIN OF LONDON CONCERN THAT LYRICS CANT GET YOU TRIALED OR JAIL TIME… UMM. WHEN YA ROPE IN SPIRITUAL LAW YES IT CAN… ALSO ALEXIS MIGHT HASPVE HARASSED YAL AS HERSELF .. IM NOT DISCOUNTING THAT.. IM SHUFFLING MY BOARD ON WHAT TAKES PRECEDENT FOR ME IM AWAY FROM MY FACE TO FACE TWIN FLAME TRISTAN BARTON… SO I DONT WANT TO JUDGE IN FULL DEPTS SO IM KEEPING IT SURFACE AS MUCH AS I CAN UNLESS THE PASSED OVER NEEDS TO THROW IN SOME INFORMATION.. YA SEEN ME TALKING W LEXI.. ABOUT MARONDA IAN BABY MAM CA$h IMPOSING AS LEXI TO HARASS.. PARTLY HOW SHE LOST HER LIFE RATSHIT MIC YA HELPED THEM HARRASS OTHERS IN HER NAME OR GOT THE SAME THING TO YOU… ALL PARTS WILL BE LOOKED AT… BUT IM ON A ISLAND MILES AWAY FROM THE BASE… TF YOU WANT ME TO DO.. I ALREADY SAID I FEEL LIKE A BAD LEADER FOR THAT THATS ANPERSONAL OPINION… WHILE FAMILY TELECOMMUNICATES FOR THE WAY THIS IS SET UP IM NOT ACTUALLY DOING A BAD JOB… U PURPOSELY TRYING TO TAKE ADVANGE OF ME AND MAKE ME LOOM LIKE IM DOING PREMEDITATIED MURDER ON YA … MY SKY FAMILY SIT AT THE TOP OF UR CARTEL AND GANGS LMAO AND THEY DONT MOVE UNLESS I SAY TO MY SKY FAMILY SIT AT THE TOP OF THE WHITEHOUSE.. WATCH DOGS WAITING FOR ME TO WAKE,,, ITS ABOUT THE NEXT “rank” WHO WRONGED US TO STEP TO ME AND HELP… THOSE WHO “accidentally” walked devils road … UR LOOKING FOR A WAY OUT TO BE CLEANSED.. IM GIVING YOU THE BLUEPRINT.. U CHOSE TO NOT HEAR ME…

How you started hating God in the first place … Satan two.

[cogximyun]

~♡Welcome to my Corner Shop!♡~

I hope you’re doing well! Take your time and feel free to browse! <3

A few notes to be made about this blog!

I am 18 of 05! Under 18 please interact minimally, I will *not* dm you back!

You can call me Minxie!! Or Minx or any other pet names ^^ I LOVE nicknames!!

Lifestyle Jirai who is ‘trying’ to heal but still with bad habits! Not that I need to detail what I’m struggling with, yall are Jirais you already know tbh :/

I tag trigger warnings! If you think tagging is useless/stupid etc. (or if you only use the Jirai tag when talking about self destructive topics) GET OFF MY BLOG!! It literally takes NOTHING to have a little compassion!

If you need something tagged, TELL ME!!! Or if I haven’t tagged something TELL ME!!!!

Some of my interests!

Kinda anything typically Jirai…. save from like… a few things

PJSekai Player! Akito and Ena kin 😞 Also Minori!

That also being said I am a Vocaloid fan too!!!!! Started listening to it in like… 2012 so a bit of a veteran (# ^ u ^#)

My favourite vocaloid is Megurine Luka!!! I project onto her a lot…

I play Obey Me! My favs are Satan Simeon and Solomon (〃ω〃) the three S’s <3

I love love love Cogimyun!! She’s my favourite sanrio character and I really love her song covers on youtube!!

That’s about all for now~ I will update when I remember things I should’ve added…

[bepractical]

Kin: Season 1, Episode 9, Part 3

It’s here! My final recap for season 1 of Kin. 

Before I get into it, a little ramble. I first watched Kin as free in-flight entertainment on a plane from NYC to Dublin. I made it halfway through the third episode. By the time Michael killed Caolan Moore, got locked in the bar, freaked out and possibly triggered a seizure, I was done. It was too much to take in on public transit. Hours later, safely ensconced in my Dublin hotel, I hunted down some episode recaps to spoil the hell out of me until I was able to sate my fears, re: Michael having a seizure in the middle of a hit. Then I discovered RTÉ player and watched the remaining episodes from my phone. Yes, I spent my first day in Ireland getting over my jetlag and watching Kin. Worth it. 

Sometime later, I got the idea to do some recaps. There’s a real dearth of lengthy episode recaps out there, especially for shorter run shows. I started making them for me and still do, though I’m always delighted when people interact with my posts. Now the season is finally coming to an end and I need a new project. All that blabber to say, I’ve had a good time, and I’m gonna ride this wave of productivity right on into Daredevil. So if you like Charlie Cox but sassier, with tighter clothes, morals and occasional fights in hallways, stick around. I can't promise I'll be timely but I'm committing to the first season at least, though I hope to do the whole series.

Now you may be thinking, 'But bepractical, why not do recaps for Treason? That’s a short run show with little coverage.' The truth is, I read a spoiler for Treason on accident and my heart is not prepared to watch. Maybe one day.

Back to Kin! For previous parts see the masterlist here. Now onto the recap, where shit is going down! And by shit I mean, Eamon. And by down I mean, to the floor of a parking garage somewhere in Spain.

At the compound, Amanda arrives home and books it over to Birdy’s for a debrief with Birdy and Frank.

She tells them Eamon is down for peace, but he wants Eric. So that’s decided then. Birdy is 50 flavors of shocked but Frank is pissed. He correctly deduces that Amanda is at least partially responsible but I don’t care because seriously, fuck Frank.

Remember, Amanda has no intention of going through with this deal. The plan was always to kill Eamon. This charade has two purposes I can see: 1) to give Amanda and Anthony safe passage to attend Jamie’s mass and 2) to fuck with Frank. Frank has shown the bare minimum of consideration for Amanda and Jimmy’s loss. I wager Amanda wanted Frank to have a taste of what it feels like to lose your son. 

Amanda: It’s hard, even considering the idea of losing a child. You can try to imagine how painful it’s gonna be, how empty you’ll feel, how much you’ll blame yourself every day for what happened, but you won’t even get fucking close. But you’re the boss Frank. I’m sure you’ll do what’s best for everyone.

Go go go Amanda! She walks out of there with the hint of a smirk on her face while Frank overreacts like the overcompensating dickbag he is. He accuses Amanda of conspiring against him and even Birdy gets fed up. BIRDY. 

Birdy: Stop being so fucking pathetic. ‘You’re the boss’ then show it! Stop stamping your feet and shouting and do something! 

Birdy truly speaks for us all. She reasons that Eamon was always going to want a head, and if Frank wants to save Eric he’s going to have to do something. Good luck with that, sister.

Meanwhile, at the jail, Eric is trying to save himself. Good boy! Nikki's come to see him in the jail infirmary, where he’s recovering from beating himself up and where there are no cameras. I’m so proud! 

The two have a hushed conversation where Eric apologizes for not thinking of Nikki more. That’s good. Then he asks her to help find the eye witness who saw him do the shooting and to set up a hit on them. He needs her help but he wants her hands clean so he tells her to leave all the details of the hit up to Kem. KEM. Poor Eric's so far out of the loop, he may as well be in Mars. I am curious to see if and how this bites him in the ass next season. Nikki agrees and I’m so happy to see someone in this family other than Amanda do some plotting. It’s not much but I’ll take it.

Side note but apparently the cost of a hit is 20K, with 10K on top, when the job is done.

Amanda and Anthony show up for mass at the church where Jamie’s funeral was held. Amanda’s parents are there. I have this fear they’re going to kill Anthony next season, some kind of full circle bologna, but man do I hope I’m wrong. Look at this sweet face.

I’m gonna fly over most of these church scenes, which are cut throughout the next few scenes, where we catch up with Frank, Jimmy and Michael. I’ve read the mass portion is an homage to a scene in The Godfather Part II, which I have never seen. It’s possible it would have read more heavy handed if I had seen it but the gist is, the mass signals a transformation for Amanda, both in terms of her devotion to the family and her role as acting head. More on that later. 

Back at the compound, Birdy’s cleansing fire has sputtered out. She’s just a sucker for her brother, I guess. She offers to call Eamon and see what other deals can be made while Frank pouts on the couch. 

In the wilds of Ireland, Kem and Con meet clandestinley to discuss Kem’s supposed tip on Kinsella whereabouts. It’s a trap! 

Jimmy comes up on them, face covered and gun out, but dude cannot shoot. Con hits the gas and Kem, like a boss, grabs the wheel and forces him to crash. 

Con hops out of the car and tries to run but Jimmy’s finally found his trigger finger and shoots him till he runs out of bullets. Kem freaks and hightails it out of there. Even behind his mask Jimmy is horrified at himself.

Back at the compound, sad boi Frank snorts an entire handful of coke. For the first time in like, six episodes, I feel a little bit of pity for him. He was just not equipped to deal with this situation. 

While Frank’s od’ing, Birdy is on the phone with Eamon. She begs for a compromise that doesn’t involve Eric’s death and Eamon spills the beans on his deal with Amanda.

This whole thing frustrates me so much. It doesn’t matter if Amanda hypothetically chose Eric to die, she had no intention of honoring her deal with Eamon in the first place. Also, Eamon makes it clear that Amanda chose which Kinsella to die, which means someone was dying to appease Eamon. What better option is there? It’s just a cheap way to set up conflict with the family next season and I really hope they blow past it. 

Birdy runs inside to tell Frank that he was right, Amanda was out to get Eric all along! She finds him passed out on the carpet in a puddle of blood, from the nosebleed he got from his handful of coke. It’s pretty gnarly. She tries to wake him and calls emergency services. As much as Frank frustrates me I like this sibling relationship. I'm not sure if it's worth keeping Frank alive but I'd also like to see some development on his part. His spiral into ineptitude deserves a recovery.

And then, my favorite thing that may or may not have been intentional in this episode. We flip back to the church right as the priest announces, 'This is the gospel according to Matthew,' then immediately flash to the airport with Eamon. Guess who’s on his way? It’s Michael, aka Charlie Cox, aka MATTHEW MURDOCK! Intentional or not, you decide.

Eamon’s heading out of the airport with his luggage and his ex-wife’s birthday gift when he runs into Man Bun. He’s come to take Eamon directly to his dad, Eamon’s supplier, to discuss all that missing drug money.

Eamon’s visibly freaked but has no choice but to go with Man Bun and his flunky. 

They enter the parking garage and are almost to their car when Man Bun and his flunky go down with matching single shots to the head. Eamon turns around in shock and the camera spins to reveal Michael. Heck yeah! 

Eamon tries to plead his case- Amanda made a deal! The feud is over! Michael, cool as cucumber tells him Amanda lied.

He shoots Eamon right in the eyeball. Man oh man, did he deserve it. There’s a quick flash as Eamon falls of the woman from his vision that I still don’t understand and then he’s gone. 

That’s the stuff.

There’s a few danglers in this scene that I’m guessing next season will address. First off, Michael just killed three men in an airport parking garage. Yes, he was wearing a hat, and he left his gun behind (which is apparently The Move when you’re an assassin) but that place had to be chockfull of cameras. For now I’m choosing to believe that Michael is a good assassin who knows what he’s doing and didn’t put himself at unnecessary risk. We’ll see how that plays out next season. Second, Michael killed Man Bun, the son of a big time drug lord. They can handwave killing multiple people in a heavily monitored public space in the middle of the day, but they can’t handwave that. 

In the wilds, Jimmy pukes his guts up before setting fire to Con’s body and all the rest of the evidence. There’s a shot of a white sneaker that is definitely not Con’s. At first I was worried it was Kem’s, then I thought it might have been Jimmy’s. Until further notice I’m calling it an error. 

Cut to Michael leaving the garage. 

Let's take a minute to discuss how the two Kinsella brothers react to murder. Jimmy-the-softy, who had never murdered anyone before, threw up immediately. He scrambled through the clean up but that initial, visceral reaction got me. I really hope he doesn't lose his softness next season. It's the best part of his character, I think. Meanwhile, Michael showed no emotion whatsoever. Not a hint of enjoyment, for finally getting to kill the man who had terrorized him and his family, HIS DAUGHTER, for so long, but also no doubt or regret. This complete detachment is alarming and very Michael. The show has blugeoned us over the head again and again with the fact that this life is not good for Michael. He'll do what needs to be done but he gets no joy out of it.

Finally, Amanda lights a candle, presumably for Jamie.

Her mom approaches her with a plan her and her husband concocted, Operation: Get Amanda Out of This Damn Crime Family Already. Unforunately it’s too little, too late. Amanda’s a Kinsella now.  

And that's all folks! The first season of Kin. What do you think? Any thoughts or feedback? I may do one more wrap up post before I move on, we'll see. Otherwise, I hope to see you in Season 2!

[sapphicdib]

idk why but i want to provide my headcanons abt my silly little comfort characters’ identities!!

dib: gay demiboy (wow wonder why 🙄 *stares at my own sexuality*) (he/him + neopronouns)

wirt: agender + queer (he doesn’t really like labels 😌 he literally just one day thought to himself “what is my gender/sexuality?” then shrugged and said “i’ll get to that later” and never thought about it again gkajfkshd) (he/him + neopronouns)

sara: pansexual !! (she/they)

greg: panromantic + asexual :D somewhere on the spectrum of nonbinary but he doesn’t really care to pin it down! (he/they + neos)

dipper: Extremely Bisexual™ (he/him) (i hc he is still kinda Sensitive abt his masculinity even into adulthood, though he gets better at not projecting this onto others, especially after meeting wirt/dib who are gnc as fuck and he starts to understand their stance on gender)

mabel: Also Extremely Bisexual™ (she/her but also doesn’t rlly care)

pacifica: bi lesbian (bi lesbians are valid as hell!!) (she/her)

gaz: lesbian as fuck (identifies as a dyke to reclaim it) (she/her)

zim: nonbinary + gay (does not understand human gender and could not be paid to give a shit. uses gay as an umbrella term bc again he could not be paid to give a fuck) (he/him)

tak: lesbian!! (again like most irkens doesn’t really get the whole sexuality/gender thing, but finds girls/female presenting irkens attractive, so simply identifies as lesbian) (she/her)

sylvester ashling: gay nonbinary man (he/they) (he feels both male and agender depending on his mood)

giovanni potage: chaotic pansexual and nonbinary as hell! (will destroy the gender binary with his DOOMBAT) (he/they)

matoi ryuko: tomboy lesbian (she identifies wholly as a cis woman, but embraces being gnc) (she/her)

mankanshoku mako: VERY bisexual!! (she literally gets nosebleeds from both gamagoori and ryuko, and asks ryuko out on a DATE at the end of the series !! ryumako is literally canon you cannot change my mind!) (she/her)

kiryuin satsuki: lesbian sex-positive ace (the only person she ever feels sexual attraction to is nonon (which we will get to in a moment), but outside of her, she identifies as aro/ace) (she/her)

jakuzure nonon: lesbian!! (she has loved satsuki since elementary school, and is completely loyal to her, in a way can also be perceived as aro/ace aside from satsuki) (she/her)

just for shits and giggles jason funderburker (frog) is gay and trans, jason funderberker (human) is a het ace

idk why i did this i just wanted to ramble about my comfort characters and their sexualities !!!!!! all of this is my opinion plz don’t yell at me ;-;

[dee-at-the-last-drop]

Arcane Characters and their musical history + music taste

is this in the canon universe or an au? idk. maybe a bit of both <3

this is my first hc post, so have mercy on me! i have no idea if i’m formatting this correctly. this feels like a thought dump. you can also tell that i was an orchestra kid middle-high school and that i’m extremely partial to jazz :P

Caitlyn

• definitely had the classic piano + violin upbringing combo

• teen Caitlyn going ham at the violin? yeah. she was definitely first chair and everything

• her musical history is partly why Caitlyn’s posture is impeccable

• but truth be told…. our favorite enforcer has an affinity to the bass guitar

• which is HOT. (especially to a certain pink-haired someone)

• can sight read complicated bass lines and practices up in her room a lot, the amp blasting

• isn’t picky with her music taste but is nostalgic for pieces she learned growing up and a bit of jazz

• if she’s feeling particularly pine-y over a certain pinkette she’d pull out the yearning indie pop i’d feel

• i want to say she went through the dodie in her primary years -> hozier in her secondary years-adulthood pipeline but maybe that’s me projecting a little LMAOO

Jinx

• learns music very easily, could play any instrument she wanted to tbh

• but is surprisingly kin to the piano and violin, and silco has her playing music in The Last Drop occasionally

• i love the idea of Jinx practicing piano, brows knitted in concentration, and Silco watching her from the door frame practice and master a piece like the dad he is (definitely brags to Sevika about Jinx’s musicality afterwards)

• Jinx memorizing children’s tunes to annoy Sevika (and maybe heal her inner child a little) and all of Silco’s favorites to make him proud (though he always is, regardless)

• is so. SO good at her bowing and picking (in relation to the violin). it might sound chaotic at times but Jinx’s pizzicato + staccato are always so clean

• in terms of general music taste, i see Jinx as a hyperpop girl but i‘m interested to see what other people think

• also indulges in very dramatic classical music- both listening AND playing, i know Jinx puts all of her emotion into the music she plays

• p!atd/fob/tøp phase HAD to have happened at some point

Ekko

• local percussionist icon… everyone knows that Ekko knows how to make a good beat

• he’d tinker around and create his own instruments- better with every invention

• it’s giving rubber band guitar kid but 10x better

• got into drumming as a teenager and spray painted some cool (and slightly angsty) patterns onto his drum set

• also can definitely dance… not as related but…

• can play the viola as well and he played duets with jinx/powder growing up on the streets

• always thought that jinx was so impressive with her playing skills n he definitely tried to impress her with his own music

• this boy could/can VIBRATO!!! and he definitely smiles when he’s really into the music he’s playing too- you can see the joy written across his face

• he doesn’t play viola much anymore as an adult, not unless some of the Zaun children convince him to perform and play for them

• Ekko totally bonded with Jinx and their love for hyperpop when they were younger

• i feel like he’d generally listen to a lot of hype workout music, hip hop, and punk rock/alt rock

Vi

• Vi never really had the chance to play any music, nor did she really have an interest in playing growing up

• but I’m thinking of her finding Vander’s old guitar in a storage room one day and being determined to play it

• she’s embarrassed to ask Vander for help and it definitely takes a bit of time but Vi eventually masters Blackbird (by the Beatles) with Vander teaching her

• Vi is amazed that her hands could create sounds so lovely, and falls in love with the guitar- although she never really gets to learn many songs before she’s sent to prison

• But with the help of Caitlyn, Vi is able to start practicing again (she only remembers Blackbird, thinks it’s a bit embarrassing) ((Caitlyn thinks it’s cute))

• onto music taste: this girl is mainly all workout music i’m sorry…. but there’s probably a bunch of alt pop like chase atlantic and the neighborhood. also- doja cat.

• can I say she still listens to the Beatles sometimes because it reminds her of Vander and her old family <3 (idk why my brain is INSISTENT on it being the Beatles but)

• thinks that boy bands are the funniest thing ever. secretly jams out to a couple of their many of their love songs due to a certain Kiramann. accidentally becomes a 1D stan because of it

Mel

• was drawn to the cello from the very first time she watched an orchestral performance

• definitely vented out her emotions through playing music as a teen

• understands music theory really well and can play any tempo you give her

• would bring a small spray bottle for her rock stop (this is SO niche i’m so sorry i’m a cello player)

• first cello. top of the orchestra hierarchy in class

• Mel rarely has time to play anymore, but she gets extremely nostalgic listening to the cello and still uses it as a form of escapism when extremely stres.

• her music taste is. the Jazz in the Background playlist on spotify

• secret lover of ariana grande, taylor swift, and katy perry

• jayce walks into Mel humming California Girls once and almost loses his shit before remembering she’d murder him if he laughed outright at her

Viktor

• always wished he could be in an orchestra but never did

• studied music theory !!!!! and adored a violin that Heimerdinger gifted him when he entered the academy

• I also feel like Viktor has piano hands and definitely knows his way around one

• composes most of the music he plays but also loves indulging himself in improv

• music is a very personal thing for Viktor so he rarely performs/shares his music with others

• Viktor can SING. but you’d never know and he’s never tell you.

• his passion for music is second only to his passion for science and innovation

• Viktor also seems like a jazz listener to me…. and mitski. and other Sad Gay™ music

• creature w/ orchestra by half•alive is the most viktor song on the planet. go listen to it rn

Jayce

• trumpet kid (god i don’t know anything about band or band kids but)

• if he was in orchestra, he’d be THAT violin (derogatory)

• despite his big head, Jayce really is quite talented at the instruments he hones his skills on

• would be a very enthusiastic section leader

• front of the marching band, framed all of his band photos from “the glory days”

• Paramore boy. Ricky Montgomery. Imagine Dragons. very random music taste. closeted Lil Nas X fan (only Viktor and Mel know)

• I have a song for him as well. Vienna by Billy Joel <3

[gloomgrl9]

‼️NEON GENESIS EVANGELION SPOILERS‼️

i’ve only seen the show and the end of evangelion movie

also probably a mid take

Neon Genesis Evangelion is such an incredible show. the way that the characters, their lives, and their reactions to the human instrumentality project can show many feelings that people, because of how people are ‘supposed to be’, had buried is so relatable.

Shinji covers neglect, self-doubt, and forcing himself to overcome everything, giving himself no time to recover mentally from anything, until everything boils over. his coping method is through music.

Asuka, on the other hand, covers trauma(ik they all do bear with me) and anger outbursts due to this. Asukas coping mechanisms change. from when we first meet her to when her sync rates begin to drop, she covers all of her self depreciation with forcing herself to believe that she is simply better than everyone, and strives to become the best eva pilot to show her late mother and to be able to truly say she is the best, whatever it takes. however, when her rates drop, she still refuses to think it’s her fault and lashes at shinji. she works tirelessly to make herself better, to no avail. she is out at danger and when rei saves her, she tells shinji that she would have rather died than be saved. kinnie moment⁉️when her sync rates hit zero, she (from my interpretation) detaches herself from reality and disassociates because she doesn’t want to be a failure. another part to her character is her love for kaji. but what i see is that she never lived kaji, she wanted affection from him. to make up for the lack of affection throughout her life. this is me assuming that, though, because one i haven’t seen the show in ages and two we don’t know anything about her father so i’m not sure. kinnie moment⁉️

Now onto Rei ayanami. she’s not a person so get out of her rei kinnie freaks (jk that’s me lol🤭🤭) sorry anyway‼️‼️but i’m also right. rei ayanami is not human. the real ayanami died when she was four. the one we see is one of the many, many clones, or ‘dummy plugs’. it makes me wonder why, in the first episode, she was bandaged. they coulda just taken out a new one, but whatever ig. in one episode she talks about how when people don’t like how she is she changes herself and get rids of her old self. kinnie moment⁉️anyway i realize how literal she was being. also with how asuka yelled at her about how doll-like she is and would do anything she is asked of yeah it’s because she was modified to. kinnie moment⁉️ anyway i think the fact that Rei, the girl who 90% of the time was perceived to be the most inhuman,and the one who’s LITERALLY NOT HUMAN was used as one of the models of a human at the end(next to kowaru) but that’s just how i interpreted the ending.

anyway this is probably major Ls also i hope i wasn’t projecting on asuka and rei😭if you can’t tell i kin them😍😛🤭

[a-dragons-journal]

i dont "kin for fun" but through tiktok i found out about the whole kin for fun vs actual otherkin... situation ig? im having a really hard time taking it seriously... maybe im just burnt out and bitter from dealing with the worlds current events, and maybe its because on tiktok the only people i saw mad about it were white people, but you're the most reasonable person ive seen talking about it (a lot of other posts have this odd tone that 12 year olds on tiktok saying kin is the worlds greatest opression and it weirds me out) so ig my question is just... why exactly does this matter? why does it matter enough to post about and care about and not just ignore? /gen

Hey! I don’t blame you for being a bit weirded out by it, we’re a weird subculture and we’re well aware of it! xD I appreciate you taking the time to actually look into it past your first knee-jerk reaction, especially considering burnout and the state of things.

I’m not totally sure if you’re asking why otherkinity matters or why the “kin for fun” being wrong matters, so I’ll answer both - they’re pretty well tied together anyway.

The short version:

Otherkinity is an identity. It’s who we are, we can’t choose to pick it up or put it down, and it comes with struggles - though no, ‘kin are not systematically oppressed (though we are pretty badly bullied and, at this point, pushed out of our own words and spaces).

What people calling roleplay/relating to/projecting onto characters “kinning for fun” does is steal our words, make them meaningless, and in doing so, make it difficult or impossible for us to find each other. If someone says “I kin [x],” I no longer know whether they mean “I am [x] on an intrinsic level” or “haha I relate to this character a lot”. I no longer know whether they actually share my experiences or if they’re going to turn on me and call me “crazy” as soon as they realize I’m not exaggerating or joking or roleplaying. It’s done massive harm to the community as a whole because it’s become difficult to tell whether someone is actually ‘kin or if they’ve misunderstood the whole thing - and because antikin rhetoric, which I’m seeing more and more in KFF spaces, hurts far more when it’s coming from inside what you thought was a community space than when it’s coming from self-labeled “antikin.”

There are other words for roleplaying and relating to and projecting onto characters. Hell, there are words for strongly identifying with-but-not-as characters/things, though usually KFF people don’t even seem serious enough for those to fit in my experience. I’m really not sure why these people are so determined to steal and misuse our words, words that were specifically created to mean something else, when they already have their own and are just refusing to use them. (Or, hell, if you don’t feel like those fit, make your own. We did. It’s your turn to put in the work. (General you, not you-the-anon, of course.))

An analogy, if that still doesn’t quite land for you:

Consider, for a moment, the transgender community. I am aware this is a dangerous thing to say, but bear with me. Obvious CW for hypothetical transphobia up ahead is obvious.

Consider if you were part of the trans community (I don’t know if you are or not), having finally found a word to explain why you feel the way you do about yourself, why your experiences don’t seem to match up with those of everyone else around you. Having found a community, a home, full of other people like you, people you never would have met if not for words like “transgender” and “gender dysphoria/euphoria” that were created specifically to describe your experiences.

Now consider if people suddenly stumbled across your community for the first time who were not trans themselves. They see community jokes and lighthearted posts out of context, because Tumblr and Twitter aren’t exactly conducive to making sure people find the Transgender 101 information posts first. They don’t bother to do further research, assuming they understand: ah, these people like to crossdress! They like to pretend they’re a different gender! This seems like a fun hobby, I want in!

They begin to post things like this. They post photos of them crossdressing and caption them “hi, I’m [name], and I trans men!” and things of the like. Suddenly the concept of “transing for fun” seems to be everywhere - and it’s not at all what being trans actually is, but these people either don’t know or don’t care. When actual trans people try to politely correct them, they’re accused of “gatekeeping” - and to be clear, this is not “nonbinary people aren’t real,” it’s “transgender means you identify as a gender other than the one you were assigned at birth, and you’re self-identifying as the gender you were assigned at birth 100% and telling us this is just a fun hobby for you, therefore you’re not trans, you’re crossdressing or doing drag or being GNC. That’s fine, but it’s not being trans - you have other words to describe that, use those.”

(Yes, I am aware these things have a history with the trans community - please just ignore that for the sake of the analogy and bear with me on the slightly simplified version of this. “Kinning for fun” does not have that same history with the otherkin community.)

...And then the response to those attempted corrections, in some corners, turns into “wait, you ACTUALLY think you’re another gender? idk that sounds pretty unhealthy, maybe you should see a psychologist or something :\” and “you’re taking this too seriously.”

I imagine, in this hypothetical scenario, you’d also be pretty fuckin peeved.

(Obviously, in this hypothetical scenario, systematic transphobia would be an issue as well, which isn’t the case for otherkin - again, you’re gonna have to bear with me on the simplification for sake of analogy there.)

(EDIT: this is not an anti-MOGAI/exclusionist argument, this is “you’re literally telling me you don’t fit the definition,” explanation on that here)

The long version, which is probably still worth reading if you have the time and energy:

Otherkinity is... pretty core to who I am, who we as a group of individuals are. We live with being otherkin on a daily basis. Many of us spent a long time feeling different and disconnected and not understanding why until we found the otherkin community. Even people like me, who don’t share that experience and still had social connection - I’ve still had to live with weird differences that I had to learn to mask when necessary; instincts that don’t line up with human society well, feeling body parts that weren’t there and that no one else ever seemed to have, things that other kids grew out of because it was just make-believe for them and I... didn’t, because it was never make-believe for me to begin with. Oh, sure, I played make-believe too - I played warrior cats and house and all those things with the other kids, but there were things that weren’t play-pretend for me too. I didn’t have an explanation for it for a long time - it was just how I was, I was weird, and fortunately for me personally I was okay with that (many of those with species dysphoria or more trouble connecting with humans have more problems from that than I did).

And then I found the word “otherkin.” And suddenly everything fell into place, and I had an explanation for the things I’d been experiencing, and there were other people like me. Something I’d assumed didn’t exist. I found others who shared my unique experiences, who were talking about how to cope with the instinct to growl or snap jaws at people instead of expressing annoyance in a human way instead of just saying “that’s weird, don’t do that”, who were talking about dealing with phantom wings and tails, who understood me. I wasn’t weird, I wasn’t broken, I was exactly what one would expect from a dragon living in human skin. I found an explanation for myself. I found a home.

That is why otherkinity matters - it is who we are, it’s not something we can walk away from (certainly not most of us, anyway), and it’s something many of us need the support of the community to help deal with on a daily basis. Being a nonhuman in human society isn’t always easy, but it’s not something we can just magically stop being - it’s core to who we are, we (generally) didn’t choose to be this way, and we (generally) can’t choose to stop. Which is fine - the vast majority of us can cope with it just fine, with a little advice and help and space to be our authentic selves in. We found each other, we built this community from the ground up to make a space and words to make finding each other easier - or possible at all.

Thus we come to the second half of our story.

It was only a couple of years ago that the “kin for fun” trend started getting big. It had existed before that, of course, but it only started going mainstream two, maybe three years ago, from what I can tell. Suddenly people were treating “kin” like it meant relating to, projecting onto, roleplaying as, or just really really liking a character or thing - not being that thing, which is what it actually means. Not long after that, it became hard to tell whether someone saying “I kin this” meant they were that thing, that they were actually part of our community - or that they really really liked that thing and either didn’t know or couldn’t be bothered to learn that that wasn’t the case for us.

Not long after that, it became relatively commonplace to hear phrases like “otherkin are ruining kinning!!” and “you’re taking this too seriously” and “idk, if it’s that serious for you that sounds unhealthy. maybe you should get some help :\” (all directly quoted, or as exactly quoted as I can remember, from things KFF people have said to me or people I know).

It is a special kind of hell, I think, to be told “you’re taking this too seriously, that’s unhealthy” by people who are taking words created to describe your experiences, not theirs, and misusing them to mean something that you do for fun on a weekend instead of something that’s intrinsic to your being.

Perhaps more importantly, like I’ve said, it’s making it almost impossible to know whether someone who says “I kin [x]” is actually ‘kin or if they’re misusing our words to mean something else entirely. The entire point of words is to communicate ideas, and once you start misusing words to mean something totally different than what they actually mean, that communication falls apart and suddenly we might as well not have those words at all. Especially when the community is small enough and obscure enough that we’re starting to be outnumbered by the misinformation. We’re being run out of our own words, words we created to describe our experiences specifically - because we’re a small community that the wider internet can easily drown out by sheer numbers of people who either don’t know any better or don’t care to learn.

That’s the harm it does - the harm it is doing, right now. That’s why it’s important enough to post about. That’s why it matters - because we’re fighting desperately to hang onto our own words so that others like us can actually find us. Because we’re seeing young nonhumans go “this isn’t a kin, I actually am this” and screaming “No, I’m so sorry that this is what the misinformation has done to you, that’s exactly what otherkin means, you have a place here, please don’t let these non-’kin misusing our words drive you away from the very community you’re looking for and that you belong in.” Because we can’t even communicate effectively about our own experiences anymore except in semi-closed spaces like Discord servers and forums (and the number of Discord servers overrun with KFF people is absurd).

......This got very long. Hopefully it at least explained why it matters so much to me and others a bit better ^^; Thanks for hearing me out, and thank you again for looking into this beyond your initial knee-jerk reaction - I really do appreciate it.

(For further reading, if that text wall didn’t blow you out of the water completely, I recommend my “kin for fun” tag, which has more posts like this in both short and long form.)

[talonpaw]

Bluestar or Crookedstar?

bluestar

sexuality headcanon: the most bisexual woman of all time

rate them out of ten: it has been soooo long since i’ve read the first arc or her super edition so i don’t feel super confident making this call but she’s iconic! 7/10

favorite thing about them: a lot of people say her breakdown is a highlight of the first series for them and that’s true! but also i love the way she comes across as so regal from tiny firepaw’s perspective…

least favorite thing about them: the ableism discourse… the elders’ names are obviously a symptom of first arc weirdness and brightheart’s original name was absolutely cruel but i don’t think bluestar is the poster child for ableism like the fandom makes her out to be. please learn to be Normal

do i relate/project onto/kin them?: not particularly when i first read her story but something tells me i’m going to have Big Feelings during my reread

my fav ship: i am a huge bluestar/yellowfang enjoyer!!!!!!!! old ladies in love…

my fav platonic friendship: thinking about bluestar and thrushpelt makes me absolutely batshit insane

do i prefer canon or fanon?: fanon seems to be all over the place for her so i’m defaulting to canon

unpopular opinion: ……i prefer long furred bluestar [i am pelted by rocks and stones]

random headcanon: if she were a d&d character she would be a paladin, but if she played d&d herself she would play either cleric or druid

favorite MAP/PMV/AMV with them: nifty-senpai’s little pistol is one of the most iconic creations in the warirors fandom so I have to shout it out obviously but can we talk about BLUESTAR CATABOLIC SEED by bok bok choy….. because my god………………

also, oldie but goodie: technically snowfur-centric but koerenn’s snowfur youth amv is very nostalgic and hits my big bluestar feelings

crookedstar

sexuality headcanon: he’s the most respectful cishet guy you know. you come out to him as transmasc and he starts referring to you as “guy bro dude fella buddy” (but in a genuine, non-patronizing way)

rate them out of ten: 8/10. not one of my personal favorites but his story is mostly contained to the first arc and thus is (almost) immune to retcons so it’s REALLY hard to fuck him up

my fav ship: can i honest to god pick anything other than crookedwillow? they’re cute!

my fav platonic friendship: SO MUCH MORE should have been done with the crooked blue friendship… SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

do i prefer canon or fanon?: no strong feelings character-wise, but design-wise, i dislike how canon artwork tends to censor his jaw, and i like how fandom draws him as a Fucking Unit

favorite MAP/PMV/AMV with them: mama told me MAP, hey mom (rainflower and crookedkit) by ursiday

[70eeznutz]

i’m gonna make a better intro/pinned post bc fuck it

i interact from @evervirescent, i also run a dragonvale blog @the-obsidian-equinox

about me

pronoun page

you can call me Virescent or Hades

neither are my legal name, Hades is a nickname someone gave me a long time ago bc it sounds similar to my legal name and i realized it works well online

genderfluid she/he/they

(i often get confused if someone switches between different pronouns really fast when referring to the same person if multiple people are being mentioned. also i’m afab so i’m most used to she/her but i really have no preference. i don’t mind if you only use one pronoun for me, especially if that makes it easier for you)

adult (born in 2004)

pacific time zone (california)

white & grew up upper middle class with good parents, so please educate me if there’s something i wouldn’t understand!

autistic

mentally ill, but no personality or psychotic disorders

i do have a few triggers but they’re very specific

as an attempt survivor, i have no tolerance for telling someone to take their own life. it doesn’t matter how universally hated that person might be. if i see someone do this, i will block and report them, unless i can clearly tell it’s a joke. i would also prefer if people don’t make those jokes around me unless i’ve given the okay.

blog content

in theory i can write and draw but i almost never make fan content for anxiety reasons IM DOING IT GUYS!! IM GODDAMN DOING IT!!

i usually just post memes or talk about xfohv and algebralians a normal amount

i might talk or reblog about other object shows too. occasionally.

i try to tag things that may be uncomfortable or triggering but i do not do a perfect job. if you need me to tag something please leave a reply to the post in question

sometimes I misspell words or use slang and abbreviations that likely won’t work in a translator, so if you would like me to write something in a way that’s easier to translate, just let me know!

i don’t kin or simp for any characters but i can project onto them really really hard

my favorite posts will be tagged with #pinned to the fridge

my favorite ships are sevensix, 4X, nineflop, and three x five

i also love queerplatonic eight x ten

if you want to know the exact details of everything i ship and in what ways you can go to #xfohv ship chart but be warned as i use homestuck concepts

you can repost my memes just don’t claim they’re yours (i actually get excited when i see smth i made somewhere else)

on the topic of discourse/etc (don’t worry!)

i try my best to keep an open mind and see from the perspective of all sides of various topics

i will not disclose my stance on any topics because i want to keep my blog discourse free, and i also want to interact with people of different opinions so i can privately learn and understand everyone better. this does still mean i have sides i agree and disagree with, but these aren’t set in stone and aren’t relevant right now.

i believe no one actually wants to be the bad guy and most people are only trying to help, so we should all work together to find out how to help as many people as we can. we should discuss instead of argue, and mutually work toward fully understanding these topics

i will still block people who go out of their way to harass or attack others ESPECIALLY if they encourage harm on anyone

needless to say, i have no DNI, but you still might not want to follow me if you’re not comfortable with the above information. i don’t want anyone to be uncomfortable here.

this post may be updated in the future if i think of something i want to add but for now that’s it

[adampage]

so i definitely don’t kin adam cole but i can relate to projecting my very similar problems onto him. the inability to trust others despite claiming to have lots of friends? the incessant need to control everything? achievements not counting for anything once the next shiny achievement appears?? needing to game everything out? righteous indignation at those who don’t seem to need validation the way you do, or don’t have the same rigid code for themselves?? anyway i’m in this picture and i don’t like it

sjdkdkgjdhj gosh I feel you. cole has lots of problems and they all kind of stem from the same as hangman’s: narcissism and low self esteem. like he ACTS like he’s a bad mfer but he needs a “group” to be certain about himself, and not just a group but like you said, something shiny.

it’s really telling that even though they are rivals against each other, both adams have the same issues. they’re two sides of the same coin, and right now it feels like cole is taking hangman’s friends (the D.O.) and the bucks WERE having issues with cole on the subject of hangman, but in bte lately they’ve been kinda normal again.

It’s really difficult to gauge where everyone stands at the moment bc you can tell they’re trying to slow the plot down so kenny can come back. it feels like revolution was the mid-season finale, and we’re currently stuck in the filler episode portion of the season.

Sorry i digressed but. what I meant was cole has the friends and hangy has the gold and they’re in this dance of who’s gonna take it all? will someone lose their footing and make the wrong move? will one of them gain ground? all I see is two suns pushing and pulling against each other’s gravity, not realising that all they’re doing is gonna cause them both to crash into each other. (astrologers DNI this metaphor is flawed ok im aware djskdkgj)

[girl4music]

BUFFY REWATCH - S05E06 - Family

WILLOW: “My dance?

*She takes Tara's hand and leads her onto the floor as a slow song starts. They begin to dance. Willow has her hands on Tara's waist; Tara's hands on Willow's shoulders*

Good birthday?” 

TARA: “Best birthday.”

WILLOW: “I still can't believe you didn't tell me about your family and all that.” 

TARA: “I was just afraid if you saw the kind of people I came from, you wouldn't wanna be anywhere near me.”

WILLOW: “See... that's where you're a dummy. I think about what you grew up with and then I look at what you are... it makes me proud. It makes me love you more.”

TARA: “Every time I... even when I'm at my worst, you always make me feel special. 

*Willow smiles*

How do you do that?”

WILLOW: “Magic.” 

*They embrace, putting their heads on each other's shoulders and swaying to the music*

Melanie Doane (sings): “I can't take my eyes off you... I can't take my eyes off you...”

*This line of song repeats several more times as they continue slowly moving to the music and the camera moves around them. We see them slowly rising upward. Long shot of Willow and Tara surrounded by other couples who are also dancing, but Willow and Tara are floating several feet above the floor*

‘Family’ is one of my favourite episodes of the whole show. It’s definetly my favourite episode of Season 5... but then there’s not really much contest there. I love it not only because it’s the only Tara-centric episode that finally gives her some character development. But I also love it for the complex and serious themes it addresses. That of domestic abuse and found family VS blood-kin relationships. And you may well know that I am always more interested in the themes and messages conveyed in art/entertainment than the actual content of it. I’m definitely more about the meaning and the learning than the pleasure principle in watching a TV show - so therefore ‘Family’ is an important episode to me. It’s not just because I love the character it’s about,... although that does help. 

Tara is a character that is supposed to remind us of the shy and insecure character Willow used to be in the earlier seasons. However, there is much more reason for Tara to be the way she is in her demeanor than there ever was for Willow. At least in my opinion - Tara is without a doubt the most abused character in all of the show because she’s abused throughout her whole lifetime. This episode shows us that Tara is domestically abused by her blood-kinship and this reveal doesn’t exactly shock us because it’s really evident in the way Tara expresses herself. And she is abused in two different ways:

Emotionally - by her father and cousin that gaslight her to believe she’s an evil demon and use coercive control to exert power over her.

Physically - by her brother who threatens to beat her if she doesn’t do what her father tells her and how she reacts to him in the shaking and the stuttering. 

This girl has clearly been through a lot before ever meeting Willow and we really sympathise with her throughout all her interactions with her relatives (I refuse to use the word ‘family’ in regards to them because they are not) in the episode. The lack of love, support, care, kindness, generosity, understanding, trust, faith and compassion has seriously had a major affect on Tara - as it would with anyone that goes or has gone through domestic abuse or domestic violence as it’s now called and recognized. 

So for Tara... being accepted as and called ‘family’ by the Scooby Gang at the climax of the episode means a great deal. Not just for Willow and Tara’s romantic relationship but for the relationship Tara develops with all of the protagonist characters. They are now her found family and the only people she really knows and interacts with from now on. The dance scene at the end of the episode is my most favourite Willow/Tara moment. I fell in love with them when I first watched this scene. It’s the acceptance and the forgiveness Willow gives in that she understands why Tara tried to hide her prior life from her but explains that it wasn’t necessary because the fact she isn’t anything like her blood-kinship is what makes Willow love Tara more. Because she’s entirely right - anyone that can come from a cruel and violent environment like Tara did and still remain so empathetic and non-judgemental with other people deserve great admiration and respect. It’s not easy to not reflect and project that same behaviour on others. I know that firsthand. And I’ll forever feel extremely guilty for it even though it wasn’t something I could really have conscious control of at the time.

Going forward in the show, Tara’s demeanor completely changes. With the love and support of her found family and her girlfriend, her self-esteem greatly improves very quickly and she becomes a confident, secure, strong and all around beautiful person. So much so that she is able to say ‘No’ to Willow when she starts to spiral with the abusing of magic and the accumulation of power - knowing herself exactly where that can lead to as she’s tried to avoid “becoming evil” her whole life. There is the thought for me that were that the truth - were she actually part demon - I doubt she would have ever been all that evil at all.

[sapphicdib]

I’m going through your blog so apologies on how late this is but 🎥💕🏳️‍🌈 for hyperfixations asks!

AHH TY!! this is a super nice thing to open tumblr to after class!!

🎥 do you have any favorite scenes from your hyperfixation?

🌲- all of sock opera i have that damn episode memorized 😭 getting specific it would probably be the scene where bipper goes “who would sacrifice everything they’ve worked for just for their dumb sibling” and mabel goes “dipper would” and ruins her play

🛸 - literally all of dark harvest 😭 okay but specifically the ending where zim is chasing dib through the hall and all you can hear is the stupid pigeon cooing and dib is basically having a panic attack LMFAO the suspense in that scene is REAL

🍂 - adelaide parade on the boat. wirt laugh. need i say more?

💕 tell us about one of your favorite characters and why you like them!

🌲 - bill. look before you come for me he’s just sO INTERESTING. he’s literally just tormenting the pines family for fun. he switches all the functions of the holes in pacificas dads face when he’s a capitalist shill. dude does not give a fuck about ANYTHING except partying and dicking around and i can respect that. also i might be influenced by the tumblr sexymen phenomena bc i’m obsessed w studying them and i also lived through that era of the gf fandom so he’s nostalgic 😭

🛸 - DIB. DIB DIB DIBBY DIB DIB!!!!!!!!!! i could rant forever about him but listen. this little fucker was the first character i looked at and was like “shit. i kin him and i’m actually acknowledging it.” he’s just so??? RRGH. idk he’s a dumbass and he just makes me happy and i can project all of my mento illnesses onto him

🍂 - wow wonder who /s LMFAO it’s wirt!! i was instantly charmed by him just because he is simply so Shaped, but after the show oh my GOSH. he is preshush and i love him and i’m proud of him for his character growth!! i rotate him in my mind at speeds unseen by mankind i s2g

🏳️‍🌈 do you have any headcanons (lgbt, race, neuro, etc) that are important to you?

oh god this is gonna be a long one

🌲:

Dipper: bi, jewish, autism

Mabel: bi, jewish, adhd

(the pines twins have so much bisexual swag it’s off the charts 😎)

🛸:

Dib: gay demiboy (projection much?), mexican, adhd

Zim: gay, NB (“what are your pronouns” “STOP SWEARING AT ME” type deal)

Gaz: LESBIAAAANNNNN. BIG OL LESBIAN. mexican, obv, also GAZ IS FAT!!! SHE IS FAT AND U CANNOT TAKE THAT AWAY FROM ME!! also shes got anger issues n depression

Tak: Lesbian, “girl” (same deal as zim and doesn’t really get the whole “gender” thing)

🍂:

Wirt: Queer and Agender! He literally just said “fuck all that noise i don’t really like labels” and then never thought about it again. also neurodivergent

Greg: When he grows up i definitely feel like he would be nonbinary and use any pronouns! also autistic u can’t stop me every one of my blorbos is autistic i’m joining the war on autism on the side of autism

Sara: bisexual!! she/they

Those are all my headcanons that i can think of rn!! Thank u for the ask aaaaa!!! This was super fun to do after i finished my classes for the day!!

[mxpseudonym]

Too Many Questions

Pairing: Tommy x OC 

Reader Gender Expression: Male Reader (if you don’t mind straight up characterization)

Length: 4406 words (allegedly)

Warnings: None

A/N: Very self indulgent, it’s just an idea that came to mind. I’m writing a part two because this was getting too long for a tumblr post. Part II is sappy and possibly spicy, we’ll see. 

Edit: It was irking my soul that I split this piece into two parts so I combined them and now Part II doesn’t exist. 

Tommy’s Betrayal 

--

"What the fuck did you just say?"

Tommy's eyes snapped away from their leisurely journey tracing the lines on the man's face to his cool, unyielding brown eyes.  

"Do you keep thinking about her because she was your last chance at salvation?"

The question was sharp and unavoidable. It was inappropriate. It was not a question at all, but a statement disguised in the most palatable way possible. Most importantly, it was telling. Who knew Tommy Shelby better than Jack Brewer? Only Polly Shelby, probably.

If he were honest, Tommy didn't even know how it happened. Jack was young, only just approaching his late twenties, yet he was the puppet master of London Town. His utterly charming but never quite polite disposition only helped unnerve gangsters and politicians alike when he monitored them like chess pieces. Rumors overtook facts, leaving the miraculous path Jack took from being a banker's apprentice to untamed royalty a mystery of folklore proportions. To add to it, Jack's boyish, handsome features made him unassuming.

"Don't mind the priss. He's just bein' a nuisance in the corner," Alfie Solomons grumbled as he led Tommy into the office. The rum runner nodded his head towards the back of his office, revealing a clean-shaven 22-year-old in an expensive suit.

"You're grumpy today, Alfie. You still skipping breakfast?" Jack asked, an airy arrogance to his tone. He didn't look up from the folder he was reading from while Alfie barked a sassy rebuttal, but when Jack did, his eyes locked with Tommy's. Suddenly he was standing and approaching the businessmen with an outstretched hand. His manner was as relaxed as his firm yet comfortable handshake. "Thomas Shelby, how are you? I'm Jack Brewer."

"I'd say nice to meet you, but I don't know yet." Tommy watched Jack's eyes sparkle.

"This has already made my day."

"Do you mind? We have a meeting?" Tommy motioned to Alfie, not bothering with many pleasantries. Jack looked to Alfie, a playful smile on his face.

"Alfie?"

"The kid's my partner anyway. He's a puppeteer and a walking omen if you can believe it," Alfie, in his own way, vouched for the boy.

"Anyone could have predicted the war between the Jews and the Italians. You just have to think," Jack said with a shrug.

"What kind of partners are you?" Tommy asked as he unbuttoned his suit jacket. Jack's eyes flickered down to take in his figure for a moment, not minding for a second that Tommy caught the motion. He even looked him in the eye after.

"Alfie provides security for me, and I help him out with projects here and there. He can let you know which ones."

"Ah, there's a lot of trust between you then." Tommy nodded.

"Not really. We just understand each other. If I were to betray Alfie, I'd lose business, reputation, and all the dark rum I can swallow. If Alfie were to betray me, it would be in vain, and I'd make sure he wouldn't be able to leave more than a glimmer of false hope to his kin when he passes. Right, Alfie?" Jack looked back to Alfie, his smile still reposed and bright.

"Yeah, yeah, I've heard you. Now quit your yapping and get over here, Tommy." Alfie motioned to the chair in front of him. Before he could, a hand reached out and placed itself on Tommy's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. It would have been warm if Jack wasn't seemingly wicked at heart.

"Don't worry, Tommy, I won't interfere. I've got work to do back here."

That was a good four years ago, and now Tommy sat shirtless on a chair in Jack's posh, surprisingly well-used kitchen. Just a moment ago, Tommy was musing about how he felt robbed. It took showing up at half past midnight with a knife wound to see Jack with mused hair, wiry glasses, and a long-sleeved thermal pushed up to his elbows. Now, Tommy was looking at that same boy as if he'd lost his mind.

"You've got a lot of balls, Jack, and you're toeing a fine line. Why would you say that?" Though it was a threat, Tommy in no way thought Jack would be intimidated. Just as he suspected, the young man remained unfazed by his tone as he clumsily splashed iodine on a cotton square.

"You've always wanted more than any man could have. You loved and married an aristocrat who betrayed you because she wanted the clean version of you, and you wanted to be that clean version. I believe we'd call that a pacemaker of sorts, someone to keep you going in a certain direction. Doesn't really work that way when you're the type to risk anything to meet your goal. But it was a good try. Be brave now," Jack said, mumbling the last part as he leaned in and focused on Tommy's arm. It was only a flesh wound, a narrowly missed shanking from a rival gang's guerilla attack turned into a jagged slash on his left bicep.

"You're an insufferable bastard," Tommy said finally.

"And you suffer plenty. Is that why you like me?" Jack's eyes shifted to meet the icy blue ones for a moment, and gave Tommy a cheeky smirk.

"When did I say I liked you?"

Jack thought to the many times they'd spent together in offices, various properties they owned, hotel rooms, and the occasional Bently. He nodded and gave a knowing smile.

"You're right. I'm presumptuous."

Jack could have just about anything he wanted- a spontaneous parade that would block traffic or a shady election alike. But despite their murky history, it was no secret that his favorite carrot on a stick was Tommy Shelby.

Jack would be dead if the tables were turned, and Jack had done what Tommy did to him. An attempt at betrayal that was now years old but still fresh in Tommy's mind by the power of something akin to regret. But Jack was a different breed of man, one that Tommy yet didn't have a grasp on.

"If you hadn't tried to betray me, you wouldn't be the opportunist I thought you were. And that would have been disappointing," said Jack after revealing what he knew back then, which was everything.

He didn't ask Tommy for so much as an apology. Instead, he was here handling Tommy like he was made of glass. Tapping the iodine against thickened skin was almost too gentle. It was unnecessary. Still, Tommy sat quietly and took it because it was past 1 AM now, and he was tired, and he liked it. In the glow of the kitchen lights, Tommy let his shoulders relax and his mind wander.

He always figured he'd end up at Jack's actual apartment. Not a safe house or his third most frequented London flat, but his real home. Thinking back to when Jack first opened the door, Tommy wondered if he'd gotten one over on the man. Jack looked surprised for a moment before rolling his eyes, holding the back door open, and telling Tommy the entry cost was getting his wound dressed. It wasn't every day he could outsmart Jack. Tommy spent a considerable amount of time pinpointing the address he'd been quietly holding onto for the better part of a year. Using it now gave away some leverage, but it was worth it to see this side of Jack, calm with the haze of sleepiness inside an equally quiet house.

Were they opposites? He often felt a pang of dreadful isolation, even when his family was bickering around Arrow house's large dining table. But Jack seemed so content in his home alone, not a soul around. He'd even sent his small staff of three away on holiday for the week to avoid being asked if he wanted tea throughout the day because it drove him up a wall.

Would he like to be in a place like this, Tommy thought? Padding through the house barefoot, a warming drink in hand. The bigness that signified luxury traded in for the gift of holding a conversation with someone in the next room and smell what's cooking from his bed. And with Jack. That would be something.

"That's why you let your guard down, isn't it?" Jack brought Tommy's mind back to the present as he finally secured the bandage. He always did that. "You're not usually this careless. Were you thinking about absolution? Did you see her again?"

"You talk too much. And thinking you're always right's going to get you killed."

"No, it's not. Aren't I right anyway?"

"No."

Jack hummed, looking Tommy over for a moment. He leaned down, one hand grasping Tommy's wrist, letting his fingertips graze over the delicate skin. The other found its place on Tommy's thigh, only the smallest indention made from his fingertips.

Jack leaned into him, centimeters away from allowing their lips to brush. Instead, he inhaled softly. His nose grazed against Tommy's cheek, then his jaw, down his neck to his collarbone then up again. Tommy could feel his heart rate speed up. How could this youngin possibly get a rise out of him like this?

"You don't smell like opium anymore, Tommy. I'm proud of you," Jack spoke softly in his ear and let his thumb stroke the inside of Tommy's wrist. Those for words made Tommy's chest leap. "That means you aren't hallucinating her because you're high. And it seems like a little more than just residual love."

"You shouldn't talk about her that way. You of all people don't have the right."

A warning.

Jack pulled away far enough to see the glossy eyes of the man he let in. It was a strange feeling to be looked at with undeserved tenderness, Tommy thought. Moreso, it was unusual to be cared for.

Are you sure you vetted your new house staff properly?

Did you take precautions at your new factory?

That ciggy's not your lunch, is it?

Whether in meetings, in passing, or on purpose, there were always questions for Tommy. And when Jack felt Tommy exceeded his usual recklessness, he let him know.

And now, Jack was asking more questions. Prying. He tilted his head slightly. A warning from Tommy Shelby wasn't to be taken lightly, no matter who you were. Jack just happened to take the weight in stride.

"I shouldn't talk about Grace like what?" Jack asked.

"Like you know how she was in this world, and how she stays with me now. You don't know anything about it."

"Tommy, you know I'm thankful to her for taking care of you. I was at the wedding, wasn't I? No ill will. This isn't about her anyway; it's about you. Who else do you talk to about her? You just keep it in, don't you?"

"Gonna refer me to another head doctor? Don't waste your breath," Tommy scoffed.

"I'm going to refer you to the best psychiatrists I know as long as we both shall live. I'll make you sick of me."

"Too late."

"Well, I have nothing to lose then."

Jack straightened, reminding Tommy that he was being held only because he missed the feeling as Jack went to the liquor cabinet. He muttered something under his breath as he grabbed two glasses. That's right.

Jack was condescending, smug, even mean at times when it came to business. But when it came to Tommy, the one who sat shirtless in his kitchen with his shoulders relaxed and eyes carefully observing him, Jack had never spoken words too sharp at him. It was unnecessary, Tommy thought, because he could take it. But perhaps it was more of Jack not wanting to treat him in a way that Tommy had to brace himself to take.

"That'll help you sleep," Jack said, placing the drink in his hand. Tommy stood, gulping the small amount of brandy with ease.

"Where am I sleeping?"

"So, you want to stay?" Jack raised an eyebrow. "I can call you a cab."

"Come off it, it's unbecoming to not host a guest in a house like this," Tommy motioned around him. The phrasing made Jack's cheeks warm. Unbecoming, like some sort of debutante being scolded.

"Is the most becoming thing to do offering you my bed?" Jack leaned in close once again, giving Tommy his big eyes full of faux innocence. When he wasn't in his high-end suits or talking quite frankly, Jack had to capacity to look adorable.

"Aren't you being presumptuous?" Tommy asked. Of all the things he could have said, Tommy didn't expect that to be the one that made Jack reel back like he'd been hit. The young man moved to lean against the wall and pointed to the stairs.

"I have several guest rooms. I don't know if the beds are turned down or what that even means, but they're there."  

It was late, Tommy remembered, and Jack wasn't energized enough to keep the banter going on. Not like this. Jack took a sip of his drink and waited for Tommy. He was always waiting for Tommy.

"Is your bed turned down?" Tommy asked.

"I just told you I don't know what that means," Jack said, setting down his glass then stretching. He let his arms rest above his head. The motion revealed a toned stomach and just how low on the hips Jack's cotton bottoms actually hung.

"So you'll have to come to check for yourself, old man."

At nearly 2 AM, the only thing either of them had the energy to do was sleep. Any other revelations about Jack would have to wait until morning, and Tommy wasn't disappointed.

As he moved Jack's head from his chest and arm from around his waist, Tommy found that Jack was dead to the world when asleep. He was also prepared no matter what, evident by the new toothbrush and folded note sitting in an empty glass on the bathroom counter. The message read, 'Tommy, suit in closet, red hanger.' Did Jack know he'd wake up before him? Tommy scoffed but dressed anyway.

"What the hell are you still doing here?" Jack said through a yawn as he stumbled into the dining room at noon, where Tommy was sitting with a book and a coffee cup.

"Do you want me to leave?"

"It's fine. Taking all that smoke in your lungs is probably going to kill you," Jack said, motioning to the cigarette that was still smoking in the small ashtray on the table while he passed through to the kitchen.

"Taking its time, isn't it?"

"Don't say that. You're the only one making this fun."

"What?"

"This whole race to the top we've got going on in this city. Or the world, I guess."

"You don't have a legacy you want to leave behind when you grow old," Tommy asked. A moment later, Jack was standing in front of him with two water glasses and no willingness to accept no as an answer when he encouraged Tommy to drink.

"I'm not growing old. Someone'll get wise and kill me off before that."

Jack was as confident about this as everything else he said. He was more cynical than Tommy thought. He thought back to the one time he asked the man about the war and if he fought. Jack's answer always intrigued Tommy. Jack averted his gaze, and before quickly changing the subject, he said, "Just a bit." Whatever happened, Tommy figured it changed him.

Jack sat and made no mention of how the table's head was always his place, but Tommy could have it for now. He pulled a pastry from a dish sitting in the middle of the table and placed it in his mouth to free his hands. One picked up the paper that had clearly been read through, and one shamelessly commandeered Tommy's coffee cup. A bite of the buttery crust washed down by the coffee that made him grimace gave Jack the energy to try and read the paper. Tommy watched as the young man shuffled the pages, becoming more disgruntled by the minute.

"Why did you do this?" He asked Tommy, exasperated as he tried to find which loose insert continued the front-page story. Once he gathered it, he folded it together correctly and took a large bite of his pastry, only to be interrupted. Tommy tried to smother his growing smile and laugh to no avail. "What?"

"You're a brat."

Jack's eyes widened. He blinked for a moment, both because he never expected Tommy of all people to call him that and because he'd never seen the gangster laugh so heartily before. His mouth still full, Jack asked to clarify,

"A brat?"

"Through and through. Fussy from the moment you woke up," Tommy chuckled again. Heat crept up Jack's neck and face, but he let himself huff in amusement.

"I'm just particular."

It was a surprisingly eventful news week- horse races fixed to perfection and hollow speeches from political figures made to the public. And yet Jack found himself more interested in the unchanging man before him. He rested his chin in his palm and took Tommy in.

It was true that he hadn't expected Tommy to show up on his doorstep. But, if Tommy hadn't found his address by now, he would have been disappointed. Showing up like he did, however... Well, Jack had wanted to invite him on his own accord.

The whole thing with the Changrettas and ultimately Solomons was finally over, and Tommy could come back to him in London. They'd planned to meet on Tuesday, something about golf. Yet here, Tommy was instead, being somewhat of a nuisance. He hadn't asked if he could smoke in the house and didn't ask where the coffee was before he made. Not to mention, he handled his grouchiness with a bite of his own. A smile reached Jack's eyes and radiated through his body- this was an excellent second choice. It was like Tommy belonged there.

Almost.

"Try not to look so enamored; it's off-putting," Tommy spoke, not looking up from his book on... political influence? Something happened...

Jack reached out and placed a hand on Tommy's neck. His fingers moved up to feel the texture of his ridiculous hair cut, finally earning a glance. Jack could only imagine what Tommy would look like if he actually grew it out. The newspaper was an afterthought as Jack leaned over from his chair and pressed his lips against Tommy's. Soft, chapped, and chaste, but just what he needed all the same.

"Do I put you off?"

"All the time."

"Why are you wearing this?" Jack's hand moved to the collar of Tommy's shirt. Well, the shirt he got Tommy. The suit itself was expensive; a Belgian tailor with magic hands met Jack's requirements from the light gray color to the silver cufflinks.

"Didn't you tell me to?"

"Mm, I did. But if you're staying, then I'm just going to get you out of it."

"So straightforward."

"Says the man whose means of seduction involve alcohol, white lies about petrol, and some variation of 'let's fuck.'"

"Didn't say it was a bad thing."

"I'm making more coffee."

Jack had only placed his (formerly Tommy's) mug on the counter when the well-dressed man caged him in from behind.

"Are you not going to keep your promise?"

By nature, Jack was fearless in a way that surprised Tommy. If one believes death to be an inevitable luxury, there isn't a situation that could faze them much. In Jack's mind, either the consequence was easy, i.e., death, or it was difficult but something he'd get over at some point. Either outcome led the young man to do precisely what he wanted always.

The first time they kissed, they stood in Jack's office. Tommy was leaned against his desk, and Jack wasn't shy about leaning into him. Now in Jack's kitchen, he held that same energy. Turning in Tommy's arms, Jack wasted no time pressing their lips together again, with the older man meeting him halfway.

Tommy wasn't exactly sure how Jack managed. His kisses were dangerous- straightforward yet teasing, intense yet languid. It was helped only by the fact that they fit well together. Hands cupped a young man's face as a bold pajama-clad thigh moved between legs to press against the front of trousers. Thoughts of money were pushed aside as an expensive waistcoat was clenched between eager fingers, now a simple tool with a single-use: making them closer.

Even when he was dangerously close to light-headed, Jack considered this a worthy moment to push himself. The short breaths passed between kisses would have to suffice for now. For all Tommy called Jack bold, the young man couldn't help but let out a chuckle at how expertly dominant Tommy could be. A hand pressed to the small of his back, moving Jack and his eager thigh that brushed against Tommy's trousers closer while kissing down his neck.

"Enough," Jack breathed. Tommy looked up, unsure what he meant until Jack pushed their lips against each other again and let his hands rest on Tommy's belt. "Do you want a bed or a couch? Because I could have you right now, and I will if we go further."

The couch was closer.

Tommy's ability to concentrate was dwindling with each undone button. Open-mouthed kisses landed on every inch of available skin, making it a battle of moving fast enough to continue and not getting overwhelmed by so much contact after being touch starved. Maybe that was Jack's strategy. Sharp pain sinking into his shoulder made Tommy wince. It was a reminder that he'd been gone for a while. It was illogical and unnecessary to aim for exclusivity in whatever they called their relationship. Surprisingly, that's what made it all the more desperate.

"If I have a craving for Tommy Shelby, it doesn't matter who's around."

Jack ran a tongue over the indents of his canines and dragged it up his neck to stop and bite Tommy's earlobe.

"Hurry up," he breathed his command.

xx

"Did something happen?"

"When?"

"I don't know." Jack shrugged and tapped his cheek. Irritatingly patient, he was. They were in front of the fireplace in the den now, a fur blanket draped over them both as they laid in their underwear.  Early afternoon sun poured through the windows, illuminating the swirling smoke that left Tommy's lips.

"Then why ask?"

"Because I could know, but I always like to give you a chance to tell me voluntarily. It makes me feel less like you'd be lying to me every day if you could," Jack said, always casual, before stealing Tommy's cigarette. "Go ahead."

It wasn't that Tommy was interested in lying to the man all the time. In this instance, it was more that this was a problem Tommy got himself into and had to get himself out of. A problem that Jack had no doubt predicted like he predicted everything. Tommy thought back to his business with the Russians. Jack's first time in the Shelby Company Ltd. offices and Tommy's first time seeing the young man's face drop happened concurrently.

"Tommy," Jack almost sang his name, which only added to the tension. Tommy was a child about to be scolded for doing something he shouldn't have. "Am I too boring for you, Tommy? You had to go to the Russians?"

"A pest, always. Not boring though," Tommy said as he cleared his throat. He went to light his cigarette, giving it more concentration than required. Looking up, Tommy almost paused at the expression in Jack's eyes. There was no smile, genuine or otherwise, only the man he'd heard the haunting rumors about. What was the look he was getting? Annoyance? Disbelief? Frustration?

Instead of speaking on whatever it was, Jack placed a hand over his mouth and looked away. He swore under his breath and mumbled a few words before looking back. Maybe Jack should have told Tommy he was stupid and that the plan wasn't worth it. Doing something like this would be the nail in the coffin for any hopes of an utterly above-board business. But Jack, for once, chose his battle.

"That Tatiana Petrovna knows everything about you. The details of you being a widow, your brand of tobacco, the way you like to sin," Jack said instead. "And don't leave any weapons around. She's crazy."

Jack was good at being one step ahead or quickly recognizing when he wasn't and course correcting. But, though Tommy knew Jack wasn't a stranger to killing a man point-blank, there was still a grit that he was missing. Too eloquent and methodical to handle the Italians from New York. So he told Jack everything and how he was victorious using his Romani prowess. Jack wasn't the only strong one.

"Ah, so you're here because Polly threatened to lock you out of the safes again if you didn't take a holiday," Jack mused. That was his real question from earlier. Why the hell are you still here?

"Something like that." Tommy nodded.

"What are you going to do when you start shaking again? And hearing things?" Jack asked, offering the cigarette to its original owner.

"I'll deal with it if it happens, and it might. Nothing gin can't fix," Tommy said. He reached for the cigarette, only for it to be snatched away and tossed into the flames.

"That was a test. You failed." Jack rolled to his side, propping himself up on his forearm.

"I'm not sick, hm? I've shut the door on the war. I'm not Arthur. I can manage." Tommy could feel himself warming with anger, no, defensiveness at the idea that everything he did was to be questioned.

"I'm not letting you run around here like a dog catching rabies."

"You don't have a say in as much as you think you do," Tommy reminded him. Jack smiled in response, his eyes lightening up. He shifted his fingers then brought them to Tommy's temple in the shape of a gun.

"Go to a doctor, or I'll kill you myself. Bang."

He made a shooting motion then pulled his hand away, blowing imaginary smoke from his fingers. Tommy wondered if Jack ever made jokes. No matter his tone of voice, he always said what he meant and meant what he said. There was no getting out of this.

"What, are you my father now?

"Would you like that?"

"Christ,"

"Not quite him, either."

--

Tommy Tag: @soleil-dor;  @amysteryspot​; @captivatedbycillianmurphy

Peaky Blinders Tag List: @lilymurphy03

[extremelyblackandwhite]

heiress - 5

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

a/n: more parallels between wanda and reader plus hayward being a bitch to reader. also pierce did not die during the winter soldier events in this universe. at this point this is called wanda and y/n collectively grieving over her how shitty their lives are.

previous chapter

The young woman held a small gun in her left hand, shooting the target at least 10 metres away from her with a mechanical precision, switching it to her right hand and achieving the same type of perfection and precision not even senior agents had. Yet, there she was, one of the newest SWORD recruits. Many people had opposed for her to join SWORD straight after escaping from HYDRA and the Red Room; however, Tyler Hayward had forced for her to become a new recruit. “Having Alexander Pierce’s daughter in our team will be an asset” he said and it somehow convinced all of SWORDs panel to take her in. She had nowhere to go after all, the Red Room will be after her in no time and she had no way to defend herself alone and so SWORD was her only option. An option she thrived under, being much more advanced than any junior recruit yet it was a far cry from what she wanted. She didn’t want to be an agent but that’s what she was, what she had been trained to do.

The trainer slowly blinked walking up to her and giving her a congratulatory pat on the shoulder which everyone could sense was filled of jealousy. She was thrown to the back of the line with someone else who also inspired jealousy in most recruits. Monica Rambeau, daughter of Maria Rambeau, the current SWORD director. They had never spoken too much other than orientation day where they introduced each other by their agent number.

     - That was the coolest thing I’ve seen today. - she hide a childish smile as the next recruit started  his training. - I’m Monica. 

     - Y/N. - she smiled and shook her hand. - Is it always like this?

     - Most of time yeah. The trainers are dicks about it when you’re better than them. 

     - Men. - Y/N rolled her eyes, getting an understanding nod from Monica. 

     - Excuse me? - Tyler Hayward entered the trainee room, always dressed in a polished suit as if that would be of any worth in a fighting situation. - I’m sorry for disturbing but I need Ms. Y/N Pierce to accompany me. 

Y/N Pierce. She always hated that name, even more than her code name. The mere thought that she had that last name, the name of one of the leaders of SHIELD was almost like a cruel curse on her. Everyone seemed to think of him as this all around saint yet she knew better; after all, if he had no reservations about submitting his daughter as a project and asset then he would have no reservation in hurting anyone else. SWORD had done their best to keep her existence a secret, not really allowing the connection to pass through but she knew he was looking for her and if he wasn’t the Red Room and HYDRA definitely were. 

She shared a confused look with Monica before stepping towards Hayward who led her away from the room and into the hall. He didn’t stop to explain to her why she had been summoned, instead he just kept on walking and she took the lead to follow him, entering a blackened window filled hall. They stopped in front of a window which gave way into an autopsy scene. Y/N was used to seeing death, some would say she was born surrounding it; however, she was not prepared to see what was being shown to her. It was almost as if she were sleeping, her mother. Laid across the metal table with various doctors surrounding her, the HYDRA symbol branded onto her foot. She looked over to the side, hand over her mouth as she felt sick just to see it. 

    - Our intelligence believes HYDRA is trying to send a message and we don’t believe they won’t stop anytime soon.

    - Was it fast? Did she suffer?

    - Gunshot to the head. Quite merciful, really.

    - Why are you showing me this?

    - Well, HYDRA experimented on you but there is the possibility your “enhancements” might be genetic. 

    -  What is that supposed to mean? Why did you really brought me here, Hayward?

    - We need the next of kin’s permission to perform an autopsy and it seems that would be you, following your mother’s will.

    - No. - she stepped back. - You’re not gonna tear my mother apart for a stupid hypothesis. No. You don’t have my permission

    - We’re being kind enough to hide you from your father for no specific reason. You either accept it or we’ll be forced to hand you to SHIELD.

The night air was crisp and sharp as he sat on the swing next to hers. She hadn’t changed much other than her hair which was much longer but her face was still unblemished by the tragic unkindness of the world. After all it had been about 5 years since he last saw her and he hated the fact he had forgotten her. Somewhere, deep within himself he knew her mark was still there; he could still hear her voice in his dreams but he always chucked it to his mind crumbling under the pressure it had been under for so many years. Nevertheless, he had heard her voice plenty times, specially in Bucharest. It had haunted him from nights and nights on end; “Promise?” “Yes”, turns out it wasn’t someone he had killed but someone he had forgotten. Her of all people. It had come back all to him after that woman gave him the file. Her name alone, her lips telling him her name. He remember telling himself he would not forget him as they prepared him to go back in the blender and he did. He forgot about her but looking at her everything came back to him; the good and the bad. But the most of it was he remembered loving her, he still did, a feeling that had been dormant for a long while and suddenly awoke in him. Of course Bucky did not expect her to love him back, he didn’t blame her either. She was a good kid, too good even. 

     - Uhm ... are you enjoying it here? - she motioned her hands abstractly. - In the hex, I mean. 

     - It’s better than in hideouts with Sam and Sharon. - he chuckled dryly, looking up at the transparent yet red tinted dome. - I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. Sam is great, despite everything and Sharon ... Sharon has helped me so much, I owe her that.

     - Oh ... - her heart dropped to her stomach as an ugly feeling took over her. Sure, Wanda would say it’s jealousy but she refused to admit it. 

     - What about you? I never really asked what you did after ... you know, IT. 

    - You can say the name. - she smiled at him yet it was voidless of any emotion, as if she were used to people tip toeing around the subject which they always did. - I became a junior recruit for SWORD until the blip then ... I was gone for a while but it didn’t hurt. It was almost like I was finally at peace and then I woke up and Hayward was director. He sent me and Monica to investigate the hex Wanda created, mostly to keep his own project a bay. Then we all ran off, got classified as fugitives. The rest is really not important. 

     - I don’t really think I need to tell you what I’ve been up to.

     - You don’t ... most of it it’s my fault, anyway. - she got up from the swing once she noticed a purple light a few miles away from the limits of the hex. The back of her eyes started growing instinctively white. Bucky got up as he recognised her fighting stance, a hand safely placed upon her shoulder. - Go grab Wanda.

     - Y/N ...

     - Go grab her, now. - she stood there watching the purple light almost call out for her. Bucky chose to do what she said, the white mist involving around her fingers as she stepped towards the hex, fingers barely touching the wall. 

Bucky rushed inside the building, hoping to reach Wanda before Y/N could do anything irrational. However, before he could find the newly named Scarlet Witch, she found him with one of her twins behind her waist. Her eyes were glowing red, almost similar to those Y/N had except those eyes looked desperate, worried even.

    - Where is she? - she asked him with an ice like directness. - Where is she, Barnes?

    - Outside. She told me to come get you.

Wanda rushed past him with a speed that he had never seen before and he only followed after her. The two stepped outside the building, towards the swing tree where Bucky had left Y/N, except, she wasn’t there anymore. No, he couldn’t lose her. Not again. Vision came after the two followed by Yelena and Monica who had been awakened by the twins; however, Wanda did not need their help. She approached the hex, just missing the purple glow as it entered the woods. Bucky tried to step up but Vision pushed him back. 

    - Y/N? - Wanda broke through the hex, shutting Bucky out as well as Vision. It was night time, dark and cold surrounded by the woods of the place they had chosen to hide from the world. Breaking dawn was so far away and even the tallest individual would’ve melted into the dark night. - Y/N!

   - Are we not going to help them? - Bucky questioned back inside the hex, probably the most awake apart from the synthezoid and the former Red Room graduate.

   - It’s a witch thing. - Yelena smirked before springing into action. - We should activate the hex’s protective system in case something happens.

   - What about them? - Bucky once again interrupted, not receiving particularly kind looks from Yelena.

   - They’ll be fine, Mr. Barnes.

Y/N on the other hand walked further into the confused and dark woods, holding her small trusted silver revolver which reflected the moon light onto its surface; yet most of the light came from behind her coloured eyes. She did not know exactly why they did that, it was almost as if they light up whenever she felt threatened. Whatever it was, it was there inside of her. She, of course, knew it was Agatha lingering around; however, she never got dangerously close to the hex. It was an unspoken truth between the witch and Wanda Maximoff yet there she was. 

     - God, dear, I thought I’d have to break into the hex to get to you. - Agatha showed up from the darkness, dressed in her typical black and purple palette as if she were royalty. - So, how are you deary? Still playing Queen Elsa? Is that fun for you?

     - You’re trespassing. 

     - Come on, is that how you thank me for giving you Bucky Barnes on a platter? What else do you need to thank me? A love spell?

     - Go away, Agatha. What do you want? 

     - I am trying to help you, just like I helped Wanda. I mean how old are you, sweetheart? Old enough for HYDRA and SWORD to realise you can do much more than just magic tricks. Making a whole room objects disappear? Now that, that was impressive. If I knew you were gonna do that, I would’ve brought Barnes into your life much much sooner. - she crossed her arms. - I think you and I are very similar. Much more similar than Maximoff to be completely honest. Where were the avengers when your father handed you over to a terrorist organisation? Constantly overlooked, underestimated, seen as nothing but your father’s daughter. I understand, Y/N and I can help you if you let me help you.   

    - I ... - she faltered her response, slightly lowering down her gun. - You can really help me?

    - I know more about magic than everyone else, Y/N. I can train you, I can help you more than SWORD or Wanda Maximoff will ever help. I can even give you what you want the most. Barnes, a regular family, everything but a SHIELD recruit. A regular citizen and all I want is for you to give me my regular family. 

     - I can’t help you, Agatha.

     - I don’t mean to cause any harm, Y/N. I’m not the villain, I just want my husband back and only you can give that to me. That’s all I want. It’s a small price to pay for your happiness. I can even take it away, your powers, I can take them away and then you will have what you want. Pretty sure Barnes still has some swimmers and if he doesn’t surely Wanda can get you some kids, she sure did well with getting herself some. 

     - Y/N! - Wanda’s voice broke through the two woman’s conversation. Agatha smirked, purple eyes replacing her regular blue ones. - Y/N!

     - I think you need to make a choice, dear. 

taglist: @lookiamtrying

[btsqualityy]

BTS Second Pregnancy Series Extras: Rough Adjustments

Kim Seokjin

“Hey,” you heard Jin speak up and you glanced over your shoulder from where you had been standing at the sink, washing dishes, to look at him. “I got the boys down to bed.”

“Great,” you nodded before turning around without another word to continue the dishes. You heard him walk over to you and when you looked over at him, he was leaning against the counter right next to you.

“Still not talking to me?” He wondered and you just looked at him blankly. “Can I at least help you with the dishes?”

“Do what you want, Seokjin,” you muttered and Jin didn’t say another word as he grabbed another towel and dipped it into the soapy water, picking up a cup and beginning to wash it out. The two of you kept on like that, awkwardly maneuvering around each other as you got the dishes finished. Once you were done, you let the dishwater drain out of the sink and when you turned around, Jin was staring down at you.

“What?” You demanded to know as you looked at him.

“I really wish you’d stop this whole tough act and just talk to me,” he told you.

“Jin, anytime we talk lately, it turns into an argument and I’m really tired of arguing so,” you trailed off with a shrug. The two of you had been having more and more disagreements lately, from everything to the boys to something as simple as what to make for dinner. You had chalked it up to the fact that you were both just tired and stressed out, but it still made things difficult to handle.

“I know, I am too and I’m sorry,” he apologized and you remained quiet, letting him continue. “I know that it’s been tough to adjust to all the changes that have come along with having Carson, but I never want you to feel like we’re not still us.”

“It just feels like everything’s different,” you admitted, shaking your head as you felt tears well up in your eyes.

“I know, but that’s because they are,” Jin said softly as he gently set his hands on your shoulders, which helped to ground you a little bit. “We added another baby to our family after three years and that’s a big change.”

“But shouldn’t we have figured it out by now?” You wondered. “I mean, Car’s 10 months old now.”

“There’s no time requirement on it jagi,” Jin assured you. “All that matters is that we do figure it out, and we will. Ok?”

“Ok,” you nodded. “And I’m sorry for ignoring you. I know how that can make you feel and it’s not cool.”

“It’s ok, I forgive you,” Jin smiled, bringing his hands up and wiping your tears away before he leaned down and kissed you firmly. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” you replied, leaning forward and kissing him again. 

Min Yoongi

You slowly unlocked the front door, doing your best to be as quiet as possible as you opened the door and stepped inside. It was almost midnight, and you had been pulling late nights and early mornings at work for the last month. You hung up your keys and took off your heels, setting your purse down on the small table that sat by the front door. 

“Y/N-ah?” Yoongi called out and you gasped loudly as you stumbled back against the front door, the unexpected sound of his voice startling you. 

“Jesus Yoongs, you can’t just scare me like that,” you huffed as you reached over and turned on the light, seeing Yoongi sitting on the couch in the living room, a fluffy blanket wrapped around his shoulders. 

“Sorry,” he chuckled, watching as you walked into the living room and sat down next to him on the couch. “How was work?”

“Ugh, almost unbearably long,” you sighed heavily. “How was yours? How were the girls?”

“It was good, took them both to the studio today,” he said. “Kins was her normal self but I could barely get anything done with Kammie crawling around.”

“I told you that you wouldn’t now that she’s mobile,” you giggled. “You were barely getting away with taking her to the studio when she wasn’t crawling.”

“Eh. Then we came home, had lamb skewers, and now they’re asleep,” he finished and you hummed softly as you laid your head on his shoulder.

“I miss them,” you confessed. “It feels like I barely see them anymore.”

“They miss you too, and so do I,” Yoongi told you and you raised your head in order to look at him. “This is the first time that you and I have had a conversation longer than two minutes in weeks.”

“I know, and I’m sorry,” you replied honestly. “I’ve just been so busy with this project at work, but I finally finished today.”

“Does this mean that I finally get my wife back?” He wondered and you nodded with a smile.

“You never lost me though, you know that,” you said as Yoongi opened his blanket and you moved closer to him, smiling when he wrapped one arm around your shoulders and placed one hand on your cheek.

“I better not have,” he smirked playfully, leaning in and kissing you slowly and deeply. 

“I’m sorry,” you apologized again against his lips. “Feels like I just left you with the girls and like I’ve been ignoring you.”

“Hush,” he mumbled back, pulling away from your lips to look at you. “We’re good Min, I promise.”

“I love you.”

“I love you more,” he replied, leaning in and kissing you again. 

Kim Namjoon

“Finally,” you whispered, slowly stepping away from Maia’s crib after you laid her down for her afternoon nap. She hadn’t slept well the night before, which made her a terror to deal with once she had woken up. As you moved to walk out of her nursery, loud music suddenly filled your ears. Your eyes widened as you heard Maia’s whimper, and you knew that she was waking back up. 

Sighing heavily, you walked back over to the crib and picked Maia up, holding her to your chest. You then walked out of her room, going down the stairs and walking into the living room, where you could tell the music was coming from.

“Joon,” you called out firmly, making Namjoon look over his shoulder at you as Mason danced around the living room. “I was trying to get her down for a nap.”

“This late?” Namjoon wondered as he looked down at his phone for the time. 

“She was restless last night,” you explained shortly. “So can you turn the music down?”

“I promised Mase that we’d listen to Yoongi hyung’s mix tape together though,” he responded and you shut your eyes for a few seconds, making sure to take a few deep breaths in order to remain calm. 

“Can I talk to you in the kitchen, now?” You asked and Namjoon could hear the hidden demand in your voice so he nodded, getting up from the couch and following behind you as you walked into the kitchen.

“What’s up?” Namjoon wondered.

“Look, you’re really making this hard for me,” you admitted and Namjoon’s eyebrow rose.

“Making what hard for you?”

“Handling the kids,” you said. “Ever since I told you about how Mason felt the day you wouldn’t listen to him about that turtle, you’ve been letting him get away with everything.”

“I have not,” he shot back.

“Joon, you have,” you insisted. “And it’s ok, I understand why. All I’m saying is that it’s making me struggle a little bit.”

“It’s just way harder to balance the two of them than I thought it would be,” he confessed with a sigh. “I can’t lavish attention onto Maia like I did to Mase when he was a baby because it makes him jealous, and I can’t spoil Mase to make up for it because it makes things harder for you and Maia.”

“Baby, it’s all about finding a balance that works,” you told him gently. “Two kids are a hard adjustment, and it’s ok that you’re struggling.”

“I almost feel guilty, because I was so hard up to have another one,” Namjoon replied.

“You sound like me when we had Mase,” you chuckled at the irony. “Listen, you’ve been doing great so far so you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself and I’m sorry if I made you feel like you haven’t been.”

“You didn’t, I just didn’t realize how much I was actually struggling,” he laughed. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” you promised him, leaning up and kissing his lips gently. “Wanna know how you can make it up to me though?”

“How?”

“Get MiMi to bed,” you smiled and Namjoon nodded as he held his hands out, and you handed Maia off to him. 

“Daddy’s got it,” Namjoon whispered as he pressed a kiss to Maia’s forehead, carrying her out of the kitchen. 

Jung Hoseok 

You shut the door to the twin’s bedroom, finally having got them down to bed after reading three books to them. You then walked down the stairs, planning on cleaning up the mess that Berkeley, Lennox, and Hendrix had left behind after a day of playing. 

However, when you walked into the living room, you were shocked to see that the living room was now spotless. Netflix was set up on the large television that hung on the wall and when you looked down at the coffee table, there was an array of your favorite snacks on the table. 

“Hobi?” You called out and you suddenly felt arms wrap around your waist from behind, and you knew that it was your husband. “What’s all this?”

“Well, I was thinking that maybe we could have a little movie night in order to relax together,” he explained and you turned around in his arms to look at him. 

“It’s really nice and all Hobi, but I’m exhausted,” you admitted, making Hobi frown. “I came down here planning to clean but since you already did it, I really just wanna go to bed now.”

“Not even for a little while?” He wondered. 

“I’m tired,” you reiterated.

“Not to be that husband, but you’re always tired,” he said and you moved to reply but he held his hand up, stopping you. “I’m not saying that you don’t have any reason to be, because you do. You’re fucking Superwoman to me and the kiddos, but you’re forgetting about not only us, but yourself too.”

“Hobi, I’m sorry,” you huffed, reaching up and dragging your hands down your face. “I didn’t mean to neglect you or anything.”

“No, I know,” he assured you. “You do it without thinking, because all you’ve known since the twins were born is go, go, go and it’s gotten even worse since Hendrix was born. You’re seriously gonna end up running yourself into the ground one of these days.”

“I know, but I just want our family to be happy,” you shrugged.

“You can’t make us happy if you aren’t happy yourself,” he told you and you nodded your head. “I love you Y/N-ah, You’re fucking amazing and I’m so lucky that you’re my wife.”

“I’m lucky too, especially to have a husband who will pull my head out of my ass. Oh, and I love you too,” you replied, wrapping your arms around Hobi’s neck as you kissed him. “Hey, is the offer on the movie night still available?”

“For you?” Hobi grinned. “Always.”

Park Jimin

You sighed in relief as you let the streams of hot water running from the shower head wash over your shoulders. Today had been an extremely long day, with you being stuck at work for most of it and then having to pick Noah and Sydney up from Jimin’s parents because Jimin was still at the BigHit building. You’d found yourself having more and more days like today and if you were being honest with yourself, you hated them. You barely had any energy most days, and the little bit you did have left were poured into the kids. 

You and Jimin had barely spoken these days, let alone spent any meaningful time together and there definitely wasn’t any sex happening. Admittedly, you had begun to let your thoughts run away from you, thinking that maybe the little bit of extra baby weight that remained from having Sydney was turning him off and that’s why the two of you hadn’t been intimate. 

You were deep in your thoughts when a knock on the shower door made you almost jump out of your skin. When you turned around and pulled the door back, you saw Jimin standing there with a shy smile on his face.

“Hey Jimin-ssi,” you greeted him. 

“Hey yourself,” he replied. “I just got home hoping that I’d be in time to help you put the kids down but I see that I’ve missed that train.”

“Yeah, I put them down about an half hour ago,” you told him. “Sorry.”

“Well, can I join you then?” Jimin asked as he gestured towards the shower.

“Um, I was actually almost done,” you stammered, feeling self conscious at the prospect of Jimin seeing your body.

“Oh, alright,” he nodded before turning around and walking out of the bathroom. Sighing heavily, you shut the shower door and quickly finished up your shower before you stepped out. After wrapping a towel around yourself, you walked out of the bathroom into your bedroom, where Jimin was standing in front of the dresser.

“Hey, you ok?” You asked him as you walked over to stand next to him. 

“I should be asking you that,” he said as he turned to look at you. “I just wanted to shower with you. It wasn’t anything sexual.”

“I know but it was intimate,” you replied and Jimin’s eyebrow quirked up in confusion. “It’s just...we’ve been so busy lately and we haven’t been having sex and I just...don’t feel as confident anymore.”

“Oh jagi,” Jimin sighed, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you into a hug. “I love how you look, you know that. I’d touch you all day long if I could.”

“I know, but it’s easy to let my thoughts run away with me when we can’t spend as much time together,” you told him honestly and he pulled away from the hug so that he could look at you. 

“I don’t ever want you to doubt how I feel about you,” he stated seriously as he reached down and grabbed your hands, intertwining your fingers with his. “Even if we can’t spend as much time together, I hope you know that I’d spend all of that time we’re apart thinking about you.”

“Really?”

“Really,” he nodded with a wide smile. “I love you so much. Please don’t forget that.”

“I love you too,” you replied, kissing him firmly. “And I’m sorry for not talking to you about how I felt.”

“It’s ok, I understand,” he assured you. “Now, how about you let me show you just how beautiful I think you are?”

“Yes please,” you whispered, kissing Jimin again as he pulled the towel away from your body. 

Kim Taehyung

“Tae, let go of me!”

“No.”

“I have to clean the kitchen though!” You exclaimed. “It’s been a mess for days now.”

“Then one more day won’t make any significant difference,” he replied as he continued to hold you against his chest. After getting Spencer and Elijah down to bed, you and Taehyung had worked on cleaning up the living room and the dining room from dinner. However, when you tried to move onto the kitchen, Taehyung had grabbed you by the waist and pulled you against him, refusing to let you go.

“Seriously Y/N-ah, we should relax,” he whispered in your ear. “Feels like I barely see you or talk to you these days unless it’s in passing.”

“You’re an idol and we have two kids now, one of whom isn’t even one years old yet,” you giggled as you turned around to look at him. “What’d you expect?”

“I mean, I knew the time balance would be different but I didn’t think it’d be like this,” he admitted and you immediately took notice of his serious tone. 

“Do you really feel like we never see each other?” You asked as you reached up and cupped his cheek with your hand. 

“Sometimes. Ok, a lot of the time,” he corrected himself. “I mean, by the time I get home, you and the kids are asleep and when we wake up in the morning, it’s always about getting the kids dressed and fed and then ourselves before one of us heads to work so it feels like you and I never really have the time to talk anymore.”

“I’m sorry Tae,” you apologized, leaning forward and letting your forehead rest against his chest. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t want to make you feel bad for being the amazing mother that you are to Munchkin and Squirt,” he told you. “As long as our kids are ok, I figured that I could deal with it.”

“But you can’t,” you finished for him as you looked back up at him and he nodded his head. “I guess we both have to work on putting ourselves and our relationship first sometimes, huh?”

“Definitely. Hey, how about you and I go out on a date tomorrow night?” He suggested. “I can ask Jiminie if he’ll watch the kids for us and he’ll more than likely say yes.”

“I’d love that,” you smiled, leaning forward and pressing your lips to his. “And I love you.”

“I love you too jagi,” he grinned, leaning down and kissing you again, this time more firmly. 

Jeon Jungkook

“Mommy!” Ava yelled as you stepped through the front door into the house, and you shut the door behind you before leaning down and catching Ava as she jumped up into your arms.

“Hi Ave,” you laughed, smiling widely as Ava kissed your cheek multiple times. “Did you have fun with Daddy and Ari today?”

“Yeah,” Ava nodded as you carried her into the living room. “Aria pooped on Daddy’s hand and it was funny!”

“I live in a house full of women who live to drag me,” Jungkook grumbled from his spot on the floor, where he was playing with Aria.

“Hi Kook,” you giggled, setting Ava down before you sat on the floor next to him, leaning over and kissing him. “Besides the poop incident, how was your day?”

“It was good,” he nodded. “I think someone here is getting pretty close to wanting to walk,” he announced as he looked down at Aria, who was crawling around the living room after her sister. “How was work?”

“Alright, I guess,” you shrugged. “I’m starving though. Did you get dinner started yet?”

“Me? I thought you were picking something up on the way home.”

“Kook, we talked about it before I left this morning,” you said.

“You mean when I was probably half awake?” He chuckled. “I guess I forgot.”

“You always forget lately,” you grumbled and Jungkook looked at you with a raised brow.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” He questioned.

“It means that I never ask you to do anything but the few things I do ask of you, you always seem to conveniently ‘forget’,” you replied. 

“Y/N-ah, it wasn’t on purpose,” Jungkook told you. “And it’s not even that big of a deal.”

“But it is if we’re supposed to be a team,” you shot back. “If we’re going to make this work, we have to be on the same page and we each have to pull our own weight.”

“If?” Jungkook repeated and your eyes widened.

“I didn’t mean it that way,” you assured him, and he visibly relaxed. “I still love you, even if you’re a dickhead who forgets to make dinner.”

“I know, and I’m sorry if it seems like I’m making things harder for you,” he said. “You do so much for us, I never want you to feel like you’re doing it all alone.”

“It’s ok,” you smiled, moving closer to him as he wrapped his arm around your waist. “I love you Kook.”

“I love you more Y/N-ah,” he replied, leaning forward and kissing you firmly.