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melodygatesauthor · 1 year ago

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Okay guys, I can't believe it's been a full year since I published the first chapter of my first fanfiction story and I'm still going strong today. - (Side note...it was actually yesterday but I wanted to get all my fics posted to AO3 so I could get an accurate word count and tell you all what I've done so...it took me an extra day)

This is going to be a really long post, and I thank everyone in advance for reading all the way through if you make it. I'm taking a moment to allow myself to talk about my accomplishments over the last year, my goals for this next year, and gas myself up just a bit. As an artist, it's really hard to talk about myself in a positive light without being critical, but I'm going to do it anyway. No one asked, but this is one of the ways I wanna celebrate my ficversary so...I'm gonna do it lol.

My First Fanfic Ever

I'd like to start by sharing my beginnings with writing. If I really think back to the very first fanfiction I wrote, I thought it was a Gorillaz fic (which I still have a handwritten copy of in my closet lol), but it wasn't. I think the very first fanfic I wrote technically was a Pirates of the Caribbean fic when I was 11. I didn't even realize that's what it was, I just knew that I was SO into POTC that I wanted to write about it. It had just come out by the way, so I'm really dating myself. This was...2003.

We had this thing we had to do for school, it was like a writing assignment or something, one of those big ones that they gave you, a standardized whatever. I managed to find a way to spin it into a POTC related thing and I went OFF writing this story. It had its own twists and turns unrelated to POTC, but it was a fanfic through and through.

The Beginning of My Fan Art

When I was 12 I started listening to Good Charlotte, to a point that it was my entire personality. Everyone who knew me, knew I loved them. Every fucking art project I had in middle school (7th and 8th grade) was revolved around this band, particularly Joel Madden.

My love for them has come and gone, but I still remember how I felt at the time (not unlike how I feel toward Oscar Isaac now lol). I mean my art teacher literally had to be like "I want you to branch out, you can't make everything about them." And as an adult, I'm wondering -why the fuck not but- ...I digress.

The First Fanfic I Ever "Published"

When I was 12 (or maybe closer to 13), I became OBSESSED with the Gorillaz. When I say obsessed I mean...I listened to the album Demon Days on repeat until it fucking broke. I changed my G's when I would write by hand to match the G in their logo. I made tons of fan art and it was a damn vibe. This was the first time I really discovered fanfiction and learned what it was.

I remember reading one fanfic from some girl on this website (I'm really dating myself here, some of you will know what site this is...) Quizilla. Quizilla was THE site at the time (other than LiveJournal I think, but I never used LiveJournal and didn't know it existed at the time) for fanfiction and what you would now call "buzzfeed quizzes". This girl's writing inspired me to write my own fanfic, which I handwrote and kept in a green folder which, as I said, I still have to this day sitting in my closet.

My very first fic, and yes at 13, included some romance, some non-con (don't fucking ask me why idk even how I knew about that at 13. I was never exposed to this type of thing as a child fortunately) and other nonsense. I published it on this site, and it made me really happy. I don't remember if anyone ever read it or not tbh, but it will forever hold a place in my heart <3

My Best Friend/Emo Era

I met my best friend in high school when I was about 14. She and I are still close to this day. Not as close, but I can still tell her my most unhinged thoughts and she loves me regardless. We met because we both wrote fanfiction and lost our minds over the fact that we did. Thus started my emo era.

She was into My Chemical Romance, and I was into The Used. 2005 was a time lol. The two of us had either a binder or a composition notebook where we'd handwrite our fics and pass them back and forth between classes. I still have the ones I wrote tucked away in my house. When we'd read them she and I would leave little notes in the margins like we all leave comments today.

Most of these fics never got published, they were just for us to enjoy. I did, however, publish a fic when I was about 15, that I wrote to completion. Quizilla ended up going down, and most of us moved to Mibba.com instead, which is still a website.

Edit: I looked at Mibba, and it looks like the website is still there, but you can't search for anything, so Mibba is gone too. Not gonna lie, broke my nostalgic heart just a bit to see...Some fics I wrote on there will be gone forever. Maybe for the best, but it's still kinda sad.

The Avenged Sevenfold Era

When I tell you that Avenged Sevenfold has been my favorite band since I was 15, I'm dead ass. Are they the best band ever? Not by a long shot, but damn the way I still lose my shit over them is unhinged. Anyone who was around during this time fucking knows...they were fucking HOT. Matt Shadows really had the bulky but not shredded body type going on, they all kinda did, and I'm so here for it.

Why I'll never post any of the fics I wrote during this time, even if I get my hands on them...

I wrote them when I was 15, and I was writing about things 15 year olds shouldn't write about.

You don't know cringe until you've read those fics.

It's about real people and I'm not a fan of rpf anymore. I'm all for writing whatever you want and fiction being fiction but there's something that gives me the ick about real people fiction. No offense to anyone who writes it, that's just my feelings.

The way these guys had a hold on me for the next 5 years was ridiculous. I wrote about them a lot, by hand, on my laptop, however I could. I had so many unhinged ideas and stories it's insane. I loved every minute of it, and I always look back on this as my true start into fanfiction.

The End of an Era

All good things come to an end. After graduation, my best friend and I stayed in touch, but grew apart. I went to college and continued writing fanfic. I was pursuing a major in graphic design with a minor in creative writing. I was convinced that even though I was writing fanfiction, I was going to write a book too and it would be a bestseller.

As time went on, probably when I was about 20 or 21, I kinda stopped writing fanfiction all together. My friend wasn't really writing it anymore, and the community around Avenged Sevenfold was slowing down. I was also in the middle of a breakup and it was a whole thing, so I kinda stopped writing around this time.

I'd also, unfortunately, felt like fanfiction was for kids/teens, so didn't feel the need to continue writing anymore. I didn't want to seem like a loser writing fanfiction in my twenties...so I didn't.

For the record, you're not a loser for writing fanfiction. It's a very valid artform and it's fun. We only live for so long, so enjoy it doing what makes you happy, period. I'll probably be writing in my 50s I fucking hope lol.

Anyway, at that time, that's how I felt. I now know it's bullshit to think that way. So fanfiction fizzled out for me, and I kinda moved on to other things.

My Not-fanfiction Era

What was I doing instead of writing? Going through an emotionally and mentally abusive relationship, working on trying to build what I thought was the 'dream' (marriage, kids, a house, e.t.c.), working and playing video games.

Fortunately that relationship ended. After years of therapy (which he told me I needed because he gaslit me into thinking I was crazy lol), I grew the balls to finally tell him to fuck off and leave. It was the best decision I ever made, especially considering this was JUST before COVID hit. I shudder to this day thinking about the fact that I was almost stuck in a house with that freak during lockdown.

When that relationship ended I moved back to Maine to be with my family. I missed them and had spent basically my entire 20s in another state with some loser.

Back to Fanfiction - Kylo Ren Era

So how did I get back here? How did I get back into writing and creating fan art? The truth is, a switch literally flipped in my brain over this guy right here...

I mean...

The funny thing is, I wasn't SUPER into Star Wars before this. I liked it, I'd seen the sequel trilogy in theaters, but to me it was just a movie series. I was literally watching a Sam Collins video on YouTube where he made fun of a Kylo Ren cosplayer's thirst trap on TikTok and was like...oh that's actually kinda hot.

Thought nothing of it though, just moved on with my day...until I dreamt about him too. And then I felt this spark inside me that I couldn't shake. I literally was like...👀 something is happening here.

So I remembered this feeling from when I was a teen and recognized the impending obsession immediately. I actually googled "is fanfiction still relevant" and "is it ok to write fanfiction as an adult?"

The short answers are - yes - and - of course it is -. This was how I discovered the VERY popular Kylo Ren fic Fix Your Attitude by Kassanovella. I read it in a matter of a week, and in that time I started writing my own fic. I also rewatched ALL the Star Wars movies, and then continued rewatching the sequel trilogy on repeat just so I could get Kylo Ren's character down. I wanted to make sure I captured his voice and personality perfectly. - When I say I watched the sequel trilogy 20 times, it's not an exaggeration, I had it on constantly.-

The fic I wrote was called, Yes, Master

The first chapter of that fic was published on 09/05/2022 (one year ago today), and the last chapter was published on 10/14/2022 with a word count of 100,701. Not only is it the longest fic I've written of all the fics I've done, but it's the one I wrote the fastest. I was posting a chapter a day every day until it was finished. I mean...I literally went OFF on this story. I was so proud of it that I went to lulu.com and made myself a physical copy of it that I intend to read as part of this celebration I'm doing lol.

Wondering if anyone would be interested in me revamping this story (rewriting and updating it) and posting here? I would definitely do it if there was enough interest.

I then wrote a sequel called By Your Side which taught me SO MUCH. Here's what I learned when creating this sequel...

Not everything needs a sequel.

Writing a chapter a day isn't realistic.

I should've planned a full outline before diving into this fic.

I'm not into pregnancy fics/domestic fics all that much as far as longfics go.

It's okay to genuinely dislike something you've written and you should try to learn from that.

By Your Side is still to this day one of my least favorite fics (if not my LEAST favorite). I am still proud of myself for finishing it, (it sits at a hefty 85,599 words). I don't have to love it though. I'm just grateful for what I learned in the process of writing it and proud of myself for finishing it despite being sick of it by chapter 8 and still writing 20 chapters after that.

I also wrote my very first Yandere fic, Just You. It's a bit darker, in my opinion, than The Fractured Moon. This fic was a blast to write, and it felt very freeing to write something so disturbing. It was fun to just let myself get into a dark headspace without holding back and not feeling bad about it. It was more

The Rainbow Six Siege Era

During my time writing for Kylo, I went back to a video game I used to play a lot, Rainbow Six Siege. My Oscar Era bleeds into the Kylo and R6S era a little but I'll talk about that soon.

The Siege fandom was an interesting one...one that I'll probably not go back to much, though I may still write a little fic for it here and there as I feel inspired to. I won't dive too much into this as I know most of you are Oscar fans, but I'll mention my accomplishments here and the things I learned.

I wrote another novel-length fic for this fandom called The Recruit and the Hunter which has another 83,888 words. I actually LOVE this story, and still look back on it fondly. It was a fun one to write, and I really challenged myself to write less smut for it, and I succeeded. It focused heavily on the relationship that built between the main pairing and in my opinion it's one of my better slow-burns I've done.

Why did I leave this fandom?

Well, I'm not going to throw shade, I don't like doing that unless I have to, so I'll keep it brief. The long and the short of it is this...

The readers were getting EXTREMELY demanding. I have comments on RATH of people saying things like "I'm going to be upset if you don't give us a happy ending" and "there better be smut or I swear...". It can get really discouraging as a writer when people seem to say "I love your fic but I'll only continue to love it if you do xyz." It puts us in a dilemma, and makes it hard for us to find a balance between providing fan service, and doing what's fun for us to write. It definitely changed the outcome of RATH and I'm not happy that I gave in like that.

The requests I got were confusing and downright weird. I didn't do some of the really weird ones, and I'm not meaning to kink shame, but it was just very niche things that I couldn't get myself into. I think part of why I felt obligated to provide fan service like I mentioned in the point above, and why I caved and wrote some fanfics for these more unique requests, is because this fandom is very small, and I felt an obligation to provide.

Some of the other writers in the fandom are fucking rude. I'm not going to mention names, like I said, but I had very poor experiences with several writers in the fandom, and since I was also integrating into the Oscar fandom at the time, I could see a stark difference in the way I was being accepted in one, versus the way I was being pushed away in the other. There aren't a lot of x reader writers in the R6S fandom, and I was one of them, and there seems to be some animosity between the people who ship characters, versus the people who write x reader and that's where this mistreatment came from. I don't know, I tried making friends over there, and felt like I was getting pushed out.

So anyway, it's not for me anymore, but I still think back to certain parts of it fondly, and I may write a little more here and there as I see fit.

The Oscar Isaac Era

This really is THE era, isn't it?

As I was working on the last 10 or so chapters of Yes, Master, and after my 12th time rewatching the sequel trilogy movies, I started to fall for Poe Dameron, naturally. How could I not? I mean look at him...

So I decided that I would give Poe a prequel to my Yes, Master story called One Hell of a Pilot. This fic was so fun to write, and it's how I became involved with the Oscar Isaac community in the first place. Immediately I started following Dee, and through her I found Mona, and it was just snowballing from there. Whitney and Romana were some of the first to follow me and my shenanigans.

In December, which is when I started writing One Hell of a Pilot, another novel-length fic that ended with 80,517 words, is when I started reading Dee's fics, along with Mona's and many others. I saw their interactions and felt excited by the prospect of making new friends who were just as into some of this stuff as I was. A place that I could be myself and lose my shit over this idiot and not be judged.

I had no idea what the hell I was getting myself into.

It all started with a fic that Dee had written, I can't remember which one, probably a dbf!Santi fic, and I asked the innocent question of...

What movie is this from?

Oh shit...I didn't realize what the fuck I was getting myself into. After she told me it was Triple Frontier and I should watch it, my brother and I watched it right away. I told him a friend of mine suggested it. The way we spent the entire 1.5 hours laughing at how bad it was is still a memory I hold dear to my heart. I still didn't know at the time that this loser (Oscar my beloved) would hold a place in my heart from that day on.

My first Santi fic was a headcanon about Santi w/ a plussize reader that I called Preciously Plump. A headcanon that later got a full fic, appropriately named Preciously Plump the One-shot.

So then I read something about Moon Knight, and between Dee and Mona shoving me into it (peer pressure ftw) I caved and watched the show.

Phew...

That gave way to the first Moon Knight fic I ever wrote, How Unexpected which came out on January 3rd, 2023 of this year. I was sure that between Steven's adorable nerdy behavior, and Marc's tough exterior, I'd be head over heels for those two. I was nervous to even TOUCH Jake, because I didn't know shit about his character, and the last thing I wanted to do was write a character without it sounding like them.

I was also afraid at the time of writing the Moon Boys with DID because I didn't know anything about it, and I didn't want to misrepresent something like that. After some time went by, I got my bearings, and started working on A Bit Dodgy.

ABD is definitely one of the fics I'm most proud of. I had learned a lot from my past fics I'd written, Yes, Master, e.t.c., and figured out what it was that works best when I'm writing to not only keep myself interested, but to create a good balance between smut for smut's sake, and pushing the story forward.

When I first started writing ABD, I was sure it was going to be a 30-40 chapter fic, but as I started writing it more, I realized quickly that a lot of the chapters were just porn. Is there anything wrong with that? No...but as someone who's written nearly a million words in this past year, I don't feel the need to draw my chaptered fics out with smut just to say I wrote something x chapters or x words wrong.

That's why ABD ended up getting cut down SO MUCH from my original plan. I just made some decisions that I felt maximized the story more and used the smut as a major plot device, rather than the fic revolving around smut as the plot...if that makes any sense lol. I'm happy to say, that as of today, A Bit Dodgy has concluded, though it's the only fic I've ever finished with such a heavy heart.

I was an Oscar stan HARD after that, diving into Sucker Punch and other silly little movies filled with that silly little man whom I love so so much.

Statistics

Numbers aren't important when it comes to kudos (AO3) and likes (Tumblr) so I'm not focusing on those. What I am going to focus on...is my personal accomplishments. Like I said, I don't normally toot my own horn, but I fucking wrote A LOT this year, and I'm going to take a minute to pat myself on the back.

So NOT including my random blurbs (since I'm not bothering to cross-post those)...

My total word count from 09/05/2022-09/05/2023 is (drumroll please):

791,829 words

GEE

I had thought I would've hit a million by now but I am NOT going to complain. By the grace of the horny demon that runs the smut factory in my brain, I've written more than I ever even thought possible.

In the Moon Knight fandom alone, I've written:

238,950 words

I think the only fandom I've written more for is Star Wars, but I'd have to add it all up and I'm not doing that rn haha.

Just kidding it's:

368,566 words

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I wrote 6 novel-length fics, a total of 147 works, MK holds the record for most fics I've written at a whopping 82 fics!

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It's shocking to look back and see what I've accomplished, and to look forward to seeing what else I can do. I know that this next year I won't have the same word count, probably not even close.

I'm focusing a lot on drawing now as well as writing, plus I'm working on my first novel that I'd like to publish so things will definitely be slowing down. I'm going to continue writing, but the speed at which I churn out fics will be slower in the future.

In Conclusion

Thank you all for the support throughout this year. There's no way in HELL I would've had the drive and desire to continue writing if not for the amazing community (most the Oscar Isaac community lol) behind me. It's not just the kudos and the reblogs, it's the people who I've grown to know since joining the world of fandom.

I never had a ton of IRL friends, and I live alone (happily btw) with my dog. Being able to make some friends here that I genuinely call friends, not just people I know online, has meant the world to me. I would list everyone out, but I have a fear of accidentally forgetting to tag someone despite how much they mean to me so I'll leave it at...those people know who they are.

And to my readers (I hesitate to use the word "fans", that makes it sound so conceited), thank you to the moon and back. Without out, I wouldn't have had the drive to keep going. Kudos, Likes and Reblogs aren't everything, I can't stress that enough, but they do help keep the drive alive. (Particularly the comments). Without the little boost of excitement I get when I see that other people are just excited about what I'm doing as I am, I probably would've given up ages ago.

You all are the reason that this was even possible.

With all that being said, I have a small celebration planned that I'll announce later tonight. In the mean time, stay amazing. You keep supporting me, and I'll keep providing the fics that you all love so much

Love, Melly

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giggly-squiggily · 2 months ago

Note

I also think that Megumi is the resident interest listen to-er

Yuji rambling on about space, and the stars, and the solar system, anything about light and how reflection and refraction works, and all of the celebrity crushes he has, throwing a ball up and catching it as he lays on Megumi’s bed.

Nobara venting about stupid girl stuff. He listens intently as he softly brushes through her hair, putting a few small braids in it as he nods.

Maki spending lunch time with him, excitedly explaining how to use each tool she’s mastered.

Panda and him talking intensely about D&D stuff.

And I think Inumaki will listen to him talk about literally ANYTHING and this is why Megumi can understand him.

AHHHH! Wait I'm obsessed with this HELP!

Yuji laying on top of a half asleep Megumi, rambling on and on about the stars and horoscopes and celebrities and having those oddly deep conversations about their place in the solar system cause he's feeling extra philosophical this day. It's soothing and unexpected but so expected of him- Megumi sleeps better after chats like that.

Nobara venting to him about period cramps and shaving and how she hates the sizing in clothing stores while Megumi does her hair- he has no idea why underwire is such a sinful thing or why woman's pockets are made so shallow, but Nobara reminds him of his sister and it brings him such a sense of comfort.

Maki raving about her weapons and skills and the different types she loves and he's humming around his chopsticks nodding along with her glee thinking about how serious and at times somber she is and seeing her in such a happy state softens her edges and makes her ten times prettier in his eyes. At times he can't help but wonder how Nobara feels when she's like this. It's the same way he feels whenever Yuji is genuinely happy.

Oh God Panda and him being D&D fans I cannot! They have game nights and campaigns and their characters are best friends against the world- no one but Inumaki can keep up with their rambles but it's fun seeing them so happy.

MOOD! Megumi can tell Inumaki everything and our speech curse user is so good at listening and advice. Megumi could give him a whole monologue about his feelings regarding accidentally calling Gojo dad or the fact he's slowly developing a crush on his best friend whom he's pretty sure is straight or how he's not sure where he's going in life with his curse energy and whatnot- and Inumaki will pat his arm with a "Tuna mayo." and all his problems are resolved. Or at the very least- he doesn't feel nearly as stressed about it.

A little bonus cause YES!

Yuta and Megumi share stories about Gojo from time to time but really Megumi loves hearing Yuta's travel stories cause he has a small desire to do so himself one day and lives vicariously through him. I love to think they plan trips together down the road and Yuta takes him all over Japan in a "Fellow Gojo student road trip" sort of thing. he does it for all the first years but Megumi gets the first trip cause "Related to Gojo perks" lols

Ducky this gives me LIFE! Thank you so much for sharing the sillies with me! :D

#squiggily speaks #ask #duckymcdoorknob #Ducky let's GO!#Ducky :3 #friend :3 #jjk sillies #jjk talks #megumi fushiguro #I love him so much your honor

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alexanderflowerbird · 12 days ago

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DAY 15 AND 16

Sheesh... busy busy busy. Yesterday I didn't get to this because my sister and her partner and my sweet little niece were over and spending time with them was my top priority for the evening. My sister only lives an hour away, but between work and gas prices and her having a new baby, it can be hard to make sure we see each other as often as we'd like to. My niece is SO cute and SO loud and she loves to be bounced and sang to and she loves looking at lights and she kicks ass in her dreams and she smiles, and I am honestly obsessed with her. BESOTTED. She is so cute and sweet and I can't wait to know her better as she grows up.

Seeing my sister is wonderful too, our relationship has been very complicated, painful and off and on for much of our lives, but I'm hopeful we've finally hit a place where we can consistently be good to each other. She's an amazing mother and I have been banned more than once from crying about how proud I am of her lol. I'm the sappy, emotional sibling, and it shows when we're together, but I can tell as much as my sister doesn't wanna be sappy about stuff, she is glad to see me too and loves me back, and that's sufficient.

Today, I'm getting this done early because I don't wanna get too far behind and I have so much to take care of today. Having a single day of actual weekend REALLY sucks, let me tell you. I have to do laundry and errands and cleaning and all my grown up shit on Saturday even though it's my only day off, because I prefer to then go to work and come home and relax on Sunday then to relax all of Saturday and have Sunday be a very stressful jam packed kick off to my next week. Anyway- I'm going to the library at some point to drop off books and pick up new ones, and then I need to go and once and for all empty out my storage unit.

My husband and I are coming up with a game plan to get me to where he is, and at the base of that strategy? Money, honey. So changing my ridiculously high insurance for a more affordable option and getting rid of this extra bill where I keep stuff that is mine but I never look at or think about is a change in the right direction towards saving buku bucks that will take me home to my man. I think today I'll just give you one extra long excerpt instead of two, I hope you don't mind! Have a whole chapter, in fact. New Faith Chapter 8, to be specific. Oh! And my word count at the half way mark is 22,225 so we're doin' great and well on our way to 30k

Taglist: @thelittlestspider @theskeletonprior @badscientist @tragedycoded If you'd like to be part of my taglist, please interact with this post

Mercutio can feel the anger radiating off of Vincente like he’s personally responsible for the hottest day in summer. He isn’t helping cool the blaze with his ‘and what are you going to do about it’ expression, but luckily he was wrong about the idea of Vincente wringing his neck. That’s probably because he was only recently strangled and shaking Mercutio by his neck won’t change the fact that he spilled to a cop of all people. Vincente has already given him the spiel, chastizing him like a child about his rashness and how police are only ever trouble, how Deputy Thompson is a cop and a white man and a nuisance and will likely come back to throw Mercutio in jail until he figures out what “really happened” like cops always do when faced with things their tiny cop brains can’t explain. Vincente is usually only quietly judgemental towards people, he tries to be graceful and act as though he’s got no room to judge other people’s vices, but with cops? All the cheek turning goes out the window. It’s a little gratifying, watching Vincente make a hypocrite of himself while roaring up a sermon of ‘Cops suck’ and ‘What were you thinking’ and ‘This will cause us so much trouble’. They’re already in so much trouble, it hardly makes a difference at this point. This is exactly how he wanted to react when Vincente admitted to talking to Bishop Vigil, so he can only manage to be indignant when Vincente goes off like a flash bang. He keeps almost finishing his ranting and then looks at Mercutio, perched on his couch with a mug of coffee looking very intentionally smug and unmoved and it starts him back up again on a myriad of new points to hold against Mercutio for doing something so stupid. Mercutio would normally be moved by parts of this, riled by others, but he is honestly so tired that all of Vincente’s words roll down his back like the broiling heat of his anger.

“Even if he believes you, he’s going to latch himself to you and expect you to be his expert guidance on this. We don’t have the answers yet on why this is happening and we can’t afford to have a-... a novice following us around demanding answers. He’s probably never even seen the things we’ve seen, Mercutio, what were you thinking to involve someone from here, a cop from a place like this who’s probably only ever seen a dead cow or dog?” It’s funny that Vincente is now acting like he’s concerned for the sanity of Deputy Thompson, but it is a new angle from what he’s said so far and it does prick a little because it’s occurred to Mercutio too that if their town is suffering a mass possession event like the other towns they’ve read about, Deputy Thompson will see more blood and rot and death and horror than he probably ever thought possible. Even if he believes, he won’t be prepared for what will happen. No one can prepare themselves for such things, it’s unnatural.

“I have a theory as to why this is happening,” Mercutio redirects, both to drive away from the discussion of Thompson and to avoid admitting any guilt for involving him. His voice is a little hoarse, he’ll probably end up signing again by the evening, but he wants to try talking and if he’s smoking, which he is, he might as well speak too. “They’re trying to become us.” Vincente looks at him with an exasperated confusion, so Mercutio sighs and continues, “Humans. They’re trying to become human. It’s not possible of course and God knows why they’d want to try and be like us, but that’s what it sounds like based on Dorrance’s note. They’re trying to take the bodies and stay.” When he says it like that it sounds like the plot of a cheesy old sci-fi movie, but he’d spent the morning thinking about it before he came over to Vincente’s to confess about spilling to Deputy Thompson. Manifest destiny. They’re trying to become us. The special part of a person the demons in Alaska were searching for. While Mercutio wishes this revelation hadn’t come on the back of Dorrance’s death, it makes sense to him more than anything else. “If that’s what they’re trying to accomplish, it’s impossible. But before all this, we were sure mass possession was impossible, so. We’re in entirely untread territory here. You wanna run that up to Bishop Vigil?” Mercutio smiles when Vincente glares at him for that little dig, but Vincente only sighs at him and turns on his heel to continue pacing across his living room carpet, which by now surprisingly doesn’t have holes run into it with how many times he’s gone back and forth.

“If you’re right, we have to figure out how to put a stop to it. If we can prevent the mass possessions, we put a stop to the loss of life.” Vincente reasons, rubbing at his chin with a fingertip as though he’s planning a strategy when really, they’re up shit creek without a paddle. Demons trying to inherit the earth? What the fuck are they supposed to do about that? It’s just like Vincente though, to be hopeful and stubborn enough to not realize they’re out of their depth. Mercutio doesn’t have the heart yet to tell him, especially when if he’s right, their town will be the next attempt at this impossible demonic goal and they likely won’t figure out what to do about any of this in time to save anyone. Such a bleak consideration he’ll save for when he absolutely has to say it, when it’s necessary to save Vincente from throwing himself into a losing fight.

“I went digging for more incidents, searched world wide, but it’s only happening here, right now–” Vincente says, Mercutio interjecting, “No surprise there, America sucks and we came up with the whole Manifest Destiny thing anyway,” but Vincente carries on, “Everywhere sucks, but let me finish. There are other incidents, but I was right about what I’d told you before. All the initial victims. They’re women.”

Vincente paces back and forth, pauses, continues, “They’re all female, and old enough technically to have children.” He corrects. Mercutio holds up a thumb and makes a sound of approval.

“Inclusive, well done.”

“If it’s happening here, then we have to start there, looking for people that fit that demographic that are showing… signs of possession. After Dorrance Crawford… His possession would suggest that our initial victim is already possessed, already drawing people in.” He looks particularly troubled to say this, and Mercutio can understand why when this little suburban nest of simplicity is full of people that are in danger of being the ground zero to this strangeness, and many of them Vincente knows, at least adjacently. Mercutio can’t think of anyone off the top of his head, some of his coworkers perhaps, but if that had been the case, he wouldn’t have seen them at work over the two weeks he’d been putting in overtime to avoid Vincente and his own feelings. They’d have been out sick, or sent home for acting strangely. He’d have felt them, certainly, if they’d been in the store… the same way he’d felt Dorrance.

“That’s a needle in a haystack sort of situation.” Mercutio says, trying to be gentle and appropriately grim at the same time. Vincente looks at him sidelong for it. He knows. They both know that the hardest part of their work is that often they only can do the work when things are at their worst. He’s about to say something more when he stops his pacing abruptly, looking out one of the windows that faces the street and shows through the blinds a direct view of Mercutio’s neighbor’s house. Ms. Dorothy’s house. He’s looking at Ms. Dorothy’s house, and the pair of police cars that have pulled up in front of it. Mercutio follows his gaze and is immediately concerned for the old woman, getting up and abandoning his coffee mug to head for the door. Vincente grabs ahold of his elbow then to slow him, and instead directs him bodily to the window to watch as a pair of officers emerge from their cars, regarding each other before heading up the steps of her porch to knock at her door. They eclipse her from view, it seems like some sort of wellness check based on their postures, but Mercutio tenses almost instantly as her dark green door swings open. The feeling comes. The nonsensical constellation of burning he’d felt. It radiates even at this distance, because demons do that– they have reach some how, a bigger, more intense presence than people do. Vincente is still holding onto his arm and his concern pierces into the radiating heat of a demonic presence. The skin contact does that, overrides most anything, and Mercutio is reminded in feeling it cut through that he ought to say right now what he’s feeling.

“Ms.Dorothy’s got it.” He says, because how the fuck else is he supposed to say it. In so many words, she’s got it, whatever it is, dimly, new somehow, more new than Dorrance Crawford, but she’s got it and it’s radiating off of her like a furnace, throwing sparks against Mercutio’s tattoos. Now that he has a chance to feel it without his life in danger, he knows he has to make sense of what he can even if he’s momentarily stricken with fear for Ms.Dorothy. He pulls his arm out of Vincente’s hold and wrenches off his shirt from the nape, touching across his chest, reaching at his back and along his biceps. He has to touch it as a sort of ritual, point to it for himself, to remember where everything is. Vincente watches him intensely, too focused on what he’s said to be squeamish about his suddenly exposed chest. He’s seen this before, after all, seen Mercutio trail over his ink filled skin searching for the exact markings that are ablaze with warning heat. [Do some research here cuz ya know, be religiously respectful you are doing something deeply sacrilegious by writing this in the first place but you might as well get it right if you’re gonna offend a bunch of people lol]

He looks up from examining the votive patchwork of his tattoos to meet Vincente’s gaze and then looks across the street as the officers are turning away to leave Ms.Dorothy alone with this darkness weaning itself into her, oblivious of course, but looking at each other with a veiled, half hearted concern, a repulsion they share but don’t intend to do anything about because they don’t have to do fucking anything, really. Ms. Dorothy watches them from her doorway, and she looks mostly like herself. She looks like she’s herself but she’s ill. There’s an old paper yellowness to her that’s replaced the rosey whiteness of her skin. Mercutio has always thought Ms.Dorothy runs hot, her hands, bony and thin as they are, are always so warm and she’s got a redness to her cheeks and chin and forehead that almost make her look cold-chapped.

Now, that color is replaced with a jaundiced, spoiled cream color that’s only so clearly visible because rather than coming to the door presentable (she’s always quite concerned with being presentable and lovely to look at), she’s in a nightgown of sorts, arms and clavicles and calves exposed, the aging state of her body not hidden away behind frills and knitted sweaters and pearls. Her hair is in disarray, barely kept in a braid of goldish grey that looks like it’s been whipped from her tossing and turning in bed. She normally wears it in a style that would make you think she’s an old Texas bell, high up in the back, teased to perfection, bangs curled and not a hair out of place… Mercutio can’t fathom it, her answering the door like that. She never would, he recognizes instantly- she’d sooner die, than let anyone see her in such a state, and that tells him even more than his tattoos ablaze across his skin that something is terribly wrong. He watches her close up the door, disappearing into the cavernous darkness of her home that is normally full of light, windows open and full up with trinkets. The feeling fades like the ending sting of a sunburn, and he’s only able to tell that it’s different. Still unclear, and not any stronger or more intense than any other demon that’s blazed his flesh, just… different. Disturbingly so.

Vincente is looking at him with an urgent, hopeful concern, and ventures to put his hand on Mercutio’s bare shoulder. Mercutio has to fight not to flinch away as Vincente’s emotions slap his senses and make themselves as clear as words, the skin to skin contact making everything clearer and more vibrant than feeling people at a distance. He’s worried, but not just in the exorcist sense, not just over the state of things and how Mercutio has discovered that Ms. Dorothy is in terrible danger. The feeling is a fractured vein that leads from Mercutio to Ms.Dorothy. Ms.Dorothy is Mercutio’s strange, sweet friend. Ms.Dorothy is someone who, other than Vincente, gives a shit about Mercutio. She buys him things that remind her of him and has him over so she can steal his cigarettes and say she’s getting around to quitting. She’s important to Mercutio in a way most people aren’t because before they settled, letting anyone be more important than by the purest moral standards was to devastate himself needlessly. They saved people because it was the right thing to do and they cared because someone fucking had to. They should help Ms.Dorothy because it’s the right thing to do, period, full stop. But Vincente’s feelings are also right… This is different, and Vincente has recognized that instantly and with such intensity that his gentle touch has poured it on Mercutio like sheets of rain.

“We have to get over there to help her.” Mercutio tells Vincente hoarsely rather than commenting on the emotions that Vincente’s touch allows him to feel unbidden, using the excuse of putting his shirt back on to pull away at last.

“Yes.” Vincente says with all of his holy fortitude packed into the single word. “We should go now.” Mercutio scoffs softly at that and shakes his head.

“We can’t go now, we’re not ready for whatever the fuck that is. We need to go over what we’ve got and figure out a plan. If anything, we should wait and see if she wanders off to the source. Source meaning, whoever the fuck in our town is Jennifer Tomland.” The suggestion tastes like acid coming out of his mouth– he wants to help her now just as much as Vincente does, but he is grasping at the emotional stillness he used to adopt when faced with a situation where due to the victim’s age or circumstances, or just the very hideous nature of what demonic possession does to a body, they might fail. They really, truly might fail Ms.Dorothy, and that brings out this cruel strategy. Vincente’s expression twinges with something akin to disgust before it smooths out, his feelings a skipping stone across Mercutio’s senses from hot, furious righteousness down and down into practical understanding. Mercutio waits patiently for that to happen. It’s alright, it’s really fucked up that he’d say a thing like that– he allows Vincente to find his way past judging him.

“If she doesn’t move by nightfall, we’ll go. And we’re bringing the cop.” Mercutio decides. The blaze of anger comes right back like opening an oven.

“What? Why?” Vincente seethes, exasperated that now of all times Mercutio would bring up the police officer he had so adamantly insisted would make problems for them.

“We need a witness, someone who has at least some medical training- more hands never hurt. You got anyone in mind? Who's a better idea that you can call? Wanna call up the Dowagers and say ‘Hey, sorry but could you call a babysitter and come help us with an exorcism? Ms. Dorothy’s rotting from the inside out and we could really use some extra eyes on the situation.” Mercutio knows he’s being needlessly cruel about it, but once again, Vincente’s feelings swim through different shades of irritation, each becoming more and more rationally driven. The anger doesn’t go away, it’s just compacted by the understanding that Mercutio has the right idea, or at least the best idea they can have given the circumstances. He’d never bring the Dowagers into this part of their lives… Vincente abhors lying and is often pretty fucking bad at it, but he has lied to them for years to keep them clean and safe and to make sure the Dowagers never, ever know that his past is swarming with horrors they can’t even imagine. Mercutio waits for the dust to settle, for Vincente to agree because even if they want to strangle each other a little, they’re a team and he won’t make moves that they don’t agree to. That’s how they lose each other, and in a circumstance like this, it would be how one or both of them might fucking die.

“Fine. Let’s get together what we know and then call the officer. I don’t want to waste precious time explaining to him our methodology. He needs to be prepared to help us keep her alive and that’s all.” Vincente says with a stiff, seething conviction. Mercutio nods and then looks back across the way to Ms. Dorothy’s house. Like this from across the street, it seems so ordinary… A sight he’s seen a thousand times. The fact that what’s happening inside of Ms. Dorothy isn’t flashing like a neon light off of her ivy green house, isn’t turning her white window sills yellow or growing insidious vines all over her porch… It's unnerving, and really unfair. If they hadn’t been looking, they’d not have known until it was too late. He tries not to think of that. They saw, there’s still time.

#original story #writeblr #horror #new faith #fuck nano update

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justrandomthoughs · 2 years ago

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Obsessed with Jace and a dragon like reader who’s feral for him. Him sneaking into her room and sleeping on her bed. She confronts him about it and he’s horrified. “How’d you know?” She just looks at him and goes “my room reeks like you. It smells like we’ve mated.”

Yan! Jacaerys x Dragon! Reader - Perv! Jace is found out

TW: Swearing (by me—sorry), Sexual content, Unhealthy behavior

HMMM YES,

I know it's so implausible in the story for, like, a viable dragon-human hybrid (but thats also another story, I've been listening to too many Alt Shwift X/Alt Shift X videos lol) but I fucking LOVE the premise. Grrr, ruff ruff. Absolutely rabid for it. Y'all know Targaryen's ride dragons, so I'm enjoying connecting the dots between that and dragon reader smut lol.

Oooo, so the well-known, community wide, factual about Jace is that he's a lil' fucking pervert (but he tries not to give in to his impulsive and continual desires). So, I see him smelling your used clothes, pillows, towels, etc. Also he'd be doing it in your room, just hoping that he can do it quickly and sneakily enough that you don't catch him.

He will be raging the guiltiest, most perverse, boner and he will be PALMING that MF so hard. He might try to use what he swiped to jerk himself off, but it would only be for a moment since he doesn't want to leave any 'real' (to humans) evidence. He'd probably have a little hand towel or something with him to clean up and he'd bring it back with him so he doesn't leave any hard tracks (Oh god I just realized I picture Jace as a closet pervert... Idk y'all how do we feel about that lol. I like it since I clearly am inclined by virtue of my writing, lol, but I want to hear opinionsss!!!).

If you were for sure going to be out of the Red Keep or Dragonstone, I think he'd, at least once, lie on your bed and maybe fantasizes about talking, waking up, cuddling, fucking you on it. He just love anything that has to do with you, so he fantasizes about it for a bit. Probably also jerks himself off, turned on by the 'closeness' of the act because he's in your room. It's just filled with the essence of you, and he's drunk off it.

Dudes, when you fucking confront him he feels that HOT-ASS WHITE DREAD. He tried being really careful but I think that the high of doing something so improper and taboo like invading your personal area—and even jerking off in there—clouded his best judgement/intelligence. If it wasn't for the carnal desire, and the irrationality that stems from it, fucking up his rationality I think he'd have been smart enough to realize before he indulged that you would be able to tell. He probably had a lot of morality debates with himself, lol, but that bad side caved his will in. It would plague his mind for weeks though before he acts.

I think he might fuck up and say "How do you know?". FUCKING DEAD GIVE AWAY BRO. Deceased, but could still see it, perhaps if you teased him a lot before you revealed what you know. His brain would be too overloaded/lacking blood—it's all in his dick lol—that his self-preservation is out the goddamn window.

I think he could also say "What do you mean?" trying to be as vague as possible on his end but still probing into how damning the evidence you have against him is. BTW. By the FUCKING way. He'd be so red in the face. Stutters abound, light fidgeting (noticeable to you because dragon-observant [it just works] and also you are keeping your cool unlike him lol.), and not maintaining prolonged eye contact. Frequently breaks it to look at his feet or hands.

When you brought up the fact the the air smells like y'all mated, bro would be SO god damn dead. First off, he loves the fact that you made a comment on the possibility/result of the two of you having sex. Saying that it smells like the two of you having coupled, it makes him wonder about what it would actually smell like. Secondly, the fact that you said mated instead of fucked, had sex, or made love, gives your statement extra connotation. (What is the purpose of mating—the production of another life form, creation of life. Unlike fucked, sex, made love, the word mating indicates a direct effort to produce offspring). I think his mind might try to grab at straws and think that since you had the word mating come to your mind before fucking, etc, means that you've thought about mating with him. Starting a family with him. Being mated for life to each other. Clearly he has done the same for you. But oh god I could talk about this for longer but this is getting a bit long lol

Mind you this is all within about 1-5 mins before Dragon! Reader shows Jacaerys what the FUCK is up. This time the dragon will be riding the Targaryen....... OOOOOFFFF.

I love asks/requests/thoughts. Send them in, a bitch will talk about it (me)

#jacaerys x reader #jacaerys headcanon #jacaerys targaryen #jacaerys velaryon x reader #jacaerys velaryon #yandere jacaerys #yandere hotd #yandere jacaerys velaryon #hotd x reader

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imagine--if · 3 years ago

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heya!! i love ur soft yandere riddler imagines and was wondering if u could write general relationship hcs for eddie being full soft yandere with the reader 😍😍 thanks sm!

A/N: Soft!Yandere Eddie Nashton is perf I love him 💚

Pairing: Dano!Riddler x reader (The Batman 2022)

Warnings: Mentions of violence and stalking, obsessive loving Riddler behaviour 🥰

•♡ I swear, once Edward's met you and had you pay attention to him and smile warmly... that's it. You've infected his mind forever, and he just has to have you

•♡ Before you start properly dating, there's gonna be Eddie familiarising himself with you through the internet and socials, then through hacked cameras here and there... he doesn't exactly want to invade your privacy, but he likes knowing your safe and seeing that beautiful face to light up his day

•♡ Everything about you is just so perfect and angelic to Edward Nashton, and it's a wonder to him that someone as pure and pretty as you has ended up amongst the scum and vermin in Gotham... but no, it makes sense, because he lives in Gotham too and you two were always meant to be!

•♡ Eddie's love is so deep and obsessive that it can even overwhelm him at times. Like, he'll be killing some thug who decided to get up in your face the other night in his Riddler gear, and the fantasy of you thanking him and hugging and kissing him for his work literally makes him hyperventilate under his mask, and he has to calm down or he'll end up passing out lmao

•♡ He'll be as patient as he can before deciding to make his love known to you, most likely by getting you to his apartment and pouring out his feelings so you'll be paying attention to him fully

•♡ So assuming that you don't reject the Riddler's affections, he'll be ecstatic, honestly can't believe it's happening, that he doesn't have to daydream and imagine you two being together like soulmates are supposed to be when you're right here, all his!!

•♡ Eddie's pretty touch-starved and hasn't had proper romantic relationships before you, so any ounce of affection you give him... he's an absolute mess, whimpering and whining as he nuzzles happily into your touch and moves against you when you stop because he loves the feeling

•♡ Especially if you're playing with his hair or running your fingers lightly up and down his skin, it makes him shivery and flushed

•♡ This guy's pretty vocal and doesn't bother trying to suppress the moans that escape him when you're kissing or cuddling tightly

•♡ Anyone would think you're doing... you know, something else, when all you've done is kiss him and he won't shut up lol

•♡ You know about everything with the orphanage, and when you tell Edward about yours, he sees it as a sign of trust and bonding and he's so giddy

•♡ You have Eddie's attention whenever you want it. As soon as you call his name softly when he's scribbling in a puzzle book, he'll look right up at you with hopeful eyes behind his glasses

•♡ He's really, really protective and quite possessive, so if anyone makes you uncomfortable in the slightest and he gets to hear of it, that person won't be alive the next morning, and a new video will be added to the Riddler's streams

•♡ The videos will be extra violent and tormenting since Edward is jealous and thoroughly annoyed by how the person dared to disrespect you, and the followers drink it up with comments like, "bitch thats what you get for messing with riddlers queen" and "kill the pig, worship the goddess 😍"

•♡ No joke there, they're as respectful to you as they are to the Riddler himself and so you've got random followers around Gotham that will willingly watch your back or do things at your or Eddie's request

•♡ The Riddler's followers have heard a lot about you (obviously), and are Edward's eyes and ears when he needs them to make sure you're okay when it gets late and you're out or not with him or something

•♡ I'm not joking when I say that he sees you as a completely ethereal, beautiful being, and the obsessive Polaroids and rambles in his journals and random items of clothing and trinkets around Ed's room of you proves his devotion and adoration

•♡ He reminds you a lot that everything he's doing, he's doing for you, because an angel such as yourself can't live in a nasty, dirty city, can they?

•♡ I feel like Eddie likes babying you sometimes, being all mushy and clingy, which usually occurs late at night or in the mornings, because he gets to wake you up with loving kisses and whispers or soothe you to sleep fondling you delicately

•♡ An example of babytalk is a bunch of pet names and rambling, like, "My darling, my angel, my muse... aren't you just perfect, sweetheart? You look in the mirror and tell me we don't fit together like little puzzle pieces together like this...! Of course we do!! Awh, you're smiling- keep smiling, always, for me-"

•♡ I was gonna continue but realised I was writing a long-ass paragraph so I'll stop with the dialogue for a sec lmao

•♡ There are times when you have to ask him to shift back a little when his face is literally in yours and you can't breathe hehe

•♡ He gets all blushy and apologetic, but he can't get enough of the warmth and softness and loves enveloping himself in you

•♡ Edward gets extremely agitated when he can't see or touch you for long periods of time, and loses his patience with anyone that isn't you easily until he can relax when you're back together

•♡ He loves teaching you how to solve puzzles and riddles and stuff, because when you do Ed sees it as really hot and your cleverness is gorgeous to him - you can bond over what he's known for and best at!! One more thing to bond over?? He's interested!

•♡ I suppose it could feel invasive at times when Eddie wants to be around you constantly and know as much as he can about your past and just every little detail about your heavenly self, but he doesn't want to be invasive, he just wants to be as close to you as possible

•♡ You're the only one that can calm him down when he's having a tantrum about a riddle gone wrong or an awful flashback or something, and Edward's always thankful and relieved when he's woken gently from nightmares and all

•♡ No one's ever loved him like this before, and he cherishes any bit of attention he gets from you like they're slices of heaven... because they are

•♡ Eddie tells you he loves you constantly, feeling the need to remind you through any means possible

•♡ "I love you, sweet baby... and you love me too, right? Mm... it makes me so happy when you say that- never stop saying that, ever, ever..."

•♡ So Edward being the soft yandere that he is would never hurt you physically or mentally because he hates the thought of that. He just wants to love and protect you forever, prove to the world you're meant to be and gives you anything and everything you want to show it 💚

Taglist:

@r3ptiliaaa @birds-have-teeth @repostingmyfavs @for3v3rda1sy @glitterycheesecakegladiator @moonwritesblog @lilyevans1 @httpsunflowers @hxney-lemcn @confusedchildsstuff @phantomofthecathedral @sugahbabieexo @bokksieu @skateb0red @wilburrrsworld @philiasoul @darthcringe @felicityofbakerstreet @bloodypantomime @deadlights-darling @tianotfound @mortem-muse @ireadandream @tinyryder @kpopgirlbtssvt @truecobblepot @jessicainhell

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exovapor · 3 years ago

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I'm OBSESSED with your writing. Can you try.. Maybe, Donnie being a filthy boy being an 'stalker-ish' of his long time crush? Be checks their FB for new posts, saves every picture of them he finds? He doesn't mean to be a creep, feels guilty, but just doesn't know how to ask for more than friendship?

Good afternoon Anon. Here is my short story in relation to your ask.

I wasn't sure where you wanted me to take this, so I had to do a bit of guessing on my part. I hope this something like you were wanting.

I will admit that this ask was a bit of a struggle for me, not knowing a clear direction to take it outcome made me a little unsure of my writing and guessing abilities LOL. However, I will admit to crying along with the characters in this story more than once.

Thanks again for the ask and the initial compliment. I hope to continue to earn your favor in future posts.

· Stalker [noun]: 1a person who harasses or persecutes someone with unwanted and obsessive attention. 2a person who hunts game stealthily.

· Donnie stared at the definition on his one of his monitor screens while his various other screens were busy flashing receipts of files downloaded, text trail streams from your phone, notices of any social media post/update/like/heart/emoji, a GPS line grid of your routes today (overlayed over the routes you’d taken previously), and data search hits of anything and everything that pertained to you.

· At this point, the boy had literally every picture you had ever posted, anywhere, of yourself. In fact, he had all the pictures that other people posted of you in them. He had even gone through the effort of designing a face recognition program that picks you out of the background of total strangers’ pictures and, yeah, he had those in a file too.

· He has special file folders that compile things that you like, things you don’t like, things that make you happy, things that make you sad. He is your own personal Pinterest and you didn’t even know it… and maybe that is the part that keeps bothering him so much.

· He sits staring at that word and definition and chewing his bottom lip. True, he knows the word and the meaning, but he needed to LOOK at it, analyze it, mull it over in his guilt ridden brain.

· He just KNEW the word Stalker couldn’t apply to him.

· After all, he isn’t harassing or persecuting you, you don’t know! So, it isn’t necessarily ‘unwanted attention’. It is just…unknown attention.

· Stealthily, hmmmm, did that part apply to him? Well, He isn’t EXACTLY being stealthy.

· If you knew about technology like him, then you would probably see his programs running on your devices and be alerted to his activities. AND, if you shared his love and view of technology, then you would probably be more understanding of his activities and not consider them stealthy…just data mining. In fact, you might applaud him.

· ‘Ok, that was taking it a bit too far’, Donnie thinks to himself and he feels a band tighten and squeeze around his infatuated heart.

· He is almost certain that you would be shocked to learn of his extra curricular activities and how they revolve around every aspect of you.

· Regardless of how he tried to spin the truth and wiggle out of the definition of stalker, Donnie still felt guilty for invading your privacy. However, he honestly couldn’t help himself…at least not anymore.

· He has fought the urge, the nagging thoughts and the burning need, to know more about you for what seemed like an eternity.

· Listen to him, he is starting to sound dramatic like Mikey! What is his turning into? He is losing his rational edge!

· To be accurate, it hasn’t been an eternity. In fact, he has known you 1 year, 36 days, 14 hours, 11 minutes, and 23 seconds to be exact. However, you started occupying space in his mind 2 minutes into meeting you and your claim over his mind has grown exponentially over time.

· You were quiet and reserved during that first meeting, so there wasn’t much to go on. It started as a simple visual interest with a thought of ‘Oh. She’s pretty’.

· However, then you started talking and that changed everything.

· You opened up more and more each time you hung out with their little group, revealing layers and layers of interests and personality. You were fascinating…and that’s when his thoughts about you really started to snowball and spiral out of control.

· You went from being a simple pretty face to being a walking embodiment of everything he seriously ever dreamed of having in a mate.

· Early on, there were three sticking points that really made Donnie’s feelings problematic. 1. He was a nearly seven foot tall walking talking turtle and you weren’t. 2. You had a boyfriend that you were deeply in love with and adored. 3. Donnie was too insecure about #1 and how you felt about inter-species dating to let you know that you had started to OWN his heart.

· Now, thanks to his surveillance, there were only two sticking points….#1 and #3.

· He still remembers the feelings of that day, 44 days ago, when the blip of information popped up on this screen alerting him to the fact that your boyfriend was starting to stray.

· Donnie had severely conflicting feelings bombard him at once and it was overwhelming.

· The initial knee jerk reaction was elation, one of the problems blocking him from you may soon be null.

· However, the feeling of elation only lasted for a second or two before the intense anger and sadness set in. Donnie was honestly shocked at the depth of his anger, he didn’t even know he had that level of malice in him. Had he been in physical proximity to your boyfriend at that moment in time, Donnie isn’t sure that he wouldn’t have hurt your guy…or worse.

· How COULD this guy do this? WHY would he? He HAD YOU! What the heck was this guy thinking? Not only did he have you, but you thought the world of him. When you spoke about him you would smile so genuinely, your eyes would shine and gaze off into a bright imagined future. Donnie was always so jealous to watch it happen, he wondered what it would be like to be THAT GUY. And here the idiot was throwing it all away and meeting up with another girl!

· WHAT THE…(yes, this called for a curse) HELL…IS WRONG WITH HUMAN MEN?

· As the anger set root in his heart, the sadness engulfed Donnie like an all-consuming wave. He realized he was going to have to share this information with you, somehow, and that he was going to have to watch as it destroyed you.

· At first, Donnie had a plan to try and save you both from that fate. True, it would hurt him more to save your relationship, but he would rather be the one facing the pain and not you.

· He TRIED to circumvent the situation. He sent anonymous messages to your boyfriend stating that he knew about the infidelity and that he would tell you if needed. However, it didn’t seem like your boyfriend cared because he sent messages back stating Donnie could, basically, go fuck himself.

· Life had cruel sense of irony, thought Donnie, that is exactly what I do since this moron has the woman that I love.

· So, after trying for nearly two weeks to stop what was happening behind your back, Donnie had no choice but to let you in on the secret.

· Donnie couldn’t come right out and tell you that he caught your boyfriend cheating by hijacking your data streams and the data streams of those around you. So, Donnie intercepted some texts between your boyfriend and his mistress and he then sent you a text, under the guise of your boyfriend, telling you to meet him at a specified restaurant for a date.

· It had been a gut wrenching night for Donnie. He remembered watching it all play out on camera feeds from around the restaurant and street outside. He watched you dressed up in your pretty dress get out of your cab in front of the restaurant. You had such a lovely smile on your face, you must have thought you were in for a romantic evening.

· He watched as you walked inside and how the hostess got flustered and confused by a 2nd girl showing up for your boyfriend’s seated-for-two table.

· Donnie stopped breathing as your eyes found the new couple holding hands and giving each other sweet kisses across the table. Hands and lips that were supposed to be yours were touching some stranger.

· Donnie watched your smile and eyes die…the light of your inner sun go out…

· …and it killed him.

· He’s not sure who was crying the hardest, you standing there in that restaurant witnessing the scene or him back at the lair watching your world crush around you on his monitor.

· It had taken a while for you both to recover from that night.

· His brothers noticed his melancholy mood for a couple of weeks but Donnie wouldn’t tell them what was bothering him. And you stayed in your bed, refusing to face the world, for nearly as long.

· Eventually, the group began to notice your silence and absence, so April stopped by your apartment to check on you. She was the one to pull you out of bed, get you to shower and eat. She visited everyday and made sure you had someone to vent to and a shoulder to cry on.

· Donnie was glad that April could be there for you when he couldn’t. He didn’t think it was appropriate for him, a male, to be your confidant at that time. Especially since he felt so much guilt over having to be the one to expose you to that pain.

· No, he didn’t CAUSE the pain, but he did have to make you face it and he didn’t like not being able to protect you from it. You were such a rare, precious creature and watching you in pain felt like he was suffocating slowly.

· There were some points during those first few weeks that he questioned if he did the right thing, but logic told him it would have eventually come to pass with or without his involvement. It was better to rip the bandage of quickly and let you start to heal than it was to let you linger and drag out the inevitable.

· Donnie did secretly check on you every single night during patrol. And, of course, his surveillance feeds were always running. He watched from a distance as his beautiful phoenix burn down to ashes and, eventually, started to rise again.

· Now, it’s been over 3 months and you’ve begun to be more like your old self. Donnie can tell there is a silent sadness there, but you are able to laugh and smile with the group during your get togethers. And each time you two are left alone, his mind nags at him about those last two sticking points.

· Would you be at all interested in him? And HOW does he go about telling you that you have become the center of his world?

· Still staring at the monitor and the Stalker definition, Donnie sighs and rubs the bridge of his snout to release of the pressure now pushing against the inside of his head. The memories of what has happened, the emotions of what was and what is, it was all starting to be too much.

· “Bro, what’s all this?”, Mikey says standing behind Donnie’s chair, talking around a mouth full of pizza.

· “NOTHING!”, says Donnie, voice breaking from the stress of being caught. A startled Donnie quickly taps some keys on his keyboard and the screens revert back to the standard lair camera feeds.

· Mikey may look or even come off as naïve at times, but he’s no fool, he can sense that his older brother is trying to hide something. “Dude, seriously, what was that? I’ve been standing back here reading the screens. I saw Y/N’s name and that looked like her phone number on that other file…, you know the file that looks like texts messages. And why is there a plotted map of the area around her apartment, her work, and to the lair? What’s up?”, Mikey said giving a disapproving look at being thought a pushover.

· “Just standard surveillance, Mikey, nothing to worry about.”, Donnie says trying to placate Mikey’s curiosity. Donnie hates lying, especially to Mikey, but he’s feeling so guilty about being such a…(inward sigh)…stalking creep that admitting the truth is hard to do.

· Mikey stands there staring at Donnie and, as he does, Donnie begins to fidget with his computer chair armrests.

· Mikey stuffs the remnants of the pizza slice into his mouth and does his best Leo impersonation by crosses his arms and staring down at Donnie as sternly as his jolly face can achieve, “Dude, I’m not going to ask you again. You’ve been weird for months. We’ve let it go for the most part but now you are hiding things from me…from ME, dude! You and I, we’re like peanut butter and jelly, we’re ice cream and chocolate fudge, we young dudes have got to stick together. Trust me, bro, I’ve got you!”.

· Donnie stared at the floor, too ashamed to meet Mikey’s eyes any longer. He gave a heavy sigh and reluctantly started to speak, “Sorry Mike, I…I honestly don’t know what’s come over me lately. I’m doing things I never thought I would do, I’m feeling so guilty about it, but I don’t know if I can stop doing it either. I feel…lost.”.

· Mike relaxed his leader stance and leaned against one of Donnie’s lab tables, “Bro, I can tell you’ve been carrying some heavy stuff lately. You need to let it out.”

· Donnie felt the heat rise up through his body like he was suddenly being consumed by a fire and he ripped his glasses off his face and drew them down on the desk in frustration, “Mikey, I’m in love with Y/N. I have been for a while. I have been…”, Donnie hangs his head in shame, “…tracking all her digital foot prints and watching her. In fact, I’m the reason she found out that asshole boyfriend of her's cheated.”

· Mikey’s mouth drops open at Donnie’s demeanor and use of the word ‘asshole’, “Whoa, dude, why didn’t you say something earlier?”.

· Donnie can feel a stinging at the corners of his eyes, this was so embarrassing, so frustrating, so…..so many things at a once. He didn’t have a response for Mikey, all he could do was shake his head.

· Still with his head hung down and staring at the floor, Donnie starts to hear Mikey chuckle. Donnie looks up to see Mikey’s eyes on him and for some reason they are full of merriment at his painful dilemma. Donnie stares at his, normally, very considerate brother in astonishment, this isn’t like Mikey at all!

· “Mikey, I’m more than serious here, now is not the time to make fun of me. What is so funny?”, Donnie asks exasperatedly.

· Mikey shakes his bald head and claps his brother on the shoulder with his green hand, “Bro, she thinks you’re cute.”.

· “W-What?!”, Donnie stammers out.

· Mikey, still chuckling, says, “Yeah, dude, that’s why I asked WHY you didn’t say something about liking her sooner, she’s always thought you were cute. She and I talk about it all the time.”.

· Donnie just stares at his jolly brother in silence. His mind is too blown to form a sentence.

· Mikey turns to leave stating, “And by the way, dude, stop watching her like that…that’s just creepy.”.

@turtle-babe83 @tmntspidergirl @kokokatsworld @nittleboo @the-second-circle-of-shell

#tmnt donatello #tmnt #tmnt donnie #tmnt fanfiction #tmnt x reader #tmnt bayverse #tmnt 2016 #tmnt fandom

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narutogwriting · 3 years ago

Note

Sup! Name is lauren, I’m black with curly hair and curvy💅🏽personality wise I can be really reserved/introverted, but when I get close to someone I’ve been told I’m chill, funny, blunt, and fun to be around lol. And lastly my love language is quality time😌 I’d like to be matched up with someone from naruto and my preferred gender is male. Thank you! I’m a huge fan of your work fr!

I match you with

📷

no makeup kankuro is 🥵

Kankuro loves your curls and your curves. They really catch his eye when he first sees you and draws him to you instantly. When you meet for the first times, he's surprised by how reserved you are. You're hot as hell; why's a girl like you so shy?

As you guys get to know each other, he loves how you tell it like it is and are always cracking jokes. He's always laughing and having a good time when you're around. He also loves that you're laid back and go with the flow; you never stress out or get on him for the little shit like other people he knows, and he appreciates that.

Despite how long it took for you to open up to him, Kankuro knows it was worth the wait. He likes that he knows and has parts of you that no one else does, that he gets to see a side of you that's hidden from most of the world.

Valentine's Day

Kankuro's never been a sentimental sort of dude, never cared much for romance or big gestures of affection

With you, he actually wants to do stuff like that. He's obsessed with making you feel special and the way you light up when he does something sweet

You're so chill and easy going that it doesn't take much, but he likes to do his best to go above and beyond anyways

For Valentine's Day, he's kinda at a loss of how to make it extra special given how much he already makes sure to do for you

Temari knows you well though, and at her advice, he finally thinks he get it

The grand gestures are great and all, but what really makes you tick? You personally

How do you feel loved?

With the simple things. The obvious

Spending one on one time with him

So while you're prepared for him going over the top, doing anything and everything he cant think of to please you, he surprises you by letting you know he's taken the day off, letting Gaara know he's unavailable to help with any Kage duties

"Whatever you want to do, whereve you wanna go, we can." He tells you. "I'm all yours for the day."

Because that's all you really wanted. Some quality time with your guy. Spending it together, just you two, completely uninterrupted.

"You must really love me, huh?" You tease.

"Yeah. I really, really do."

#naruto #naruto matchups #kankuro #kankuro of the sand #kankuro x oc #kankuro x you #kankuro x reader

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syubub · 4 years ago

Text

2021 Reading for BTS and the collective!!

Wow wow wow! I didn't disappear or get dragged away by a demon. No no, I just got thrust into unexpected shadow work and I now have an unhealthy obsession with sea shanties and a love of pasta.

I had this idea planned to be early in January but that didn't pan out so I'm doing it now. I have another yoongi reading in the works and another fun thing coming soon as well!!

I promise I won't bore you to death any longer but I hope you've all been doing well!!

Disclaimer: This is for entertainment purposes only and not to be taken as fact.

If this message doesn't apply, let it fly!

Cool cool cool.

Let's get it.

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

Oki. I first want to say that this I gonna be long lol. I did a meditation and gathered some little pieces of things y'all might need to hear and then I pulled cards for every month. The fountain tarot deck is the cards for us, the collective, and the rider-waite cards are for bts. It'll make more sense when I add picks and stuff. I did a little extra card pull for yoongi for the month of May too :) I'll make sure to type out all the cards in text so you know what they are (the pics are kinda wack.) I also used my pendulum to ask if there was a bts related event for every month and that's at the bottom. It's just to take in the possible energy for the month and something that could result from that energy!

LETTUCE BEGIN (hehe)

Starting with the section for the channeled messages. I want to reiterate that this was collective so if it doesn't resonate with you, the message might not be for you! Use your intuition.

(Enough talking. Damn)

So. As I said this was through meditation and connecting to the big column tree thing (I told my cousin about the tree/pillar and they were like,, "so basically a big energy dildo in the æther?" .... I CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT IT. h e l p m e) and asking if there was any messages or advice that needed to be delivered and it was... intresting?

Things came fragmented. So there was little messages like, "Its gonna be okay" and "things are changing for everyone" and "open your eyes if you want to see" (that's sassy.) There was one particular thing that was confusing me though. Straight up it was just "flower" on repeat and like a really bad picture of a flower? Like you could tell what it was but it was bad quality. Anyway, I was like "okay. Kindly shut the fuck up. Pls." And I wrote down flower, pink flower and rose. Sooo.... idk but there you go.

More messages were things like, "the block isn't in your head", "try calling forth that which you seek" and... February. Possibly there is specific (very very very loose) connection to the 10th-19th? I'm not to sure what or why but I'd say maybe look out for opportunities on these days and also maybe external events.

Continuing with dates. In the last this 21 and January 21 came up. It came up again but with 2 messages. So first, either 21st is a day where something is put into motion (possibly private or public) or announced and the second was "add them together dumbass" that's not very kind but 3. Again this has been discussed too but but but... maybe a signal of a third mixtape 👀 (not necessarily on the 21st per say but possibly in March? I'm really not sure).

Oki. I got side tracked like I always do and started thinking about tattoos and stuff and I really want koo to have a peony tattoo. I feel it in my BONES. It would suit him so well. and as I was thinking about tattoos I heard, "don't be surprised if yoongi gets/shows a tattoo this year" ??? What the fuck? I think maybe they messing with me but now I have hopes and I don't want them to be crushed and thrown to the wind :(

Back to normal stuff, "the theme is growth" I think that fits very well with the reading. "Blue might be a lucky color" self explanatory. It might be lucky. "Start practicing grounding and centering" this was LOUD. This will help you in how you react to events in the future. Really do practice this if you haven't.

This is where it gets a little weird. So, I got a message that said "start living as if you never existed." I am not a 100% sure what this means but I think I have a pretty good guess. I hate to make it sound weird like this but by sort of focusing on something that is so hard to comprehend (because our brains can't comprehend not existing very well) you kinda break the 4th wall? Like in Deadpool when he addresses the audience and is aware that he is a character played by Ryan Reynolds? anyway, focusing on something that seemingly impossible you kind of accidentally open up the floodgates for a lot of other things. I would say if you are not in the right headspace to do this don't do it but it can be a powerful way to break up the monotony of reality. The theory that everything happens simultaneously bc time isn't a linear progression events blah blah we are energy blah blah the multiverse blah blah.. Theres so so so so so so so so so much about this and how it applies to things that I could probably write you 10+ dictionaries worth of material but for the sake of simplicity and not wanting to write a novel right now, I will continue. The main lesson is to start challenging your perception of the world around you. Ask why and why and why and why. Essentially seeing cracks in the matrix. Pulling your head out of your cosmic ass, realizing that rose you're smelling is actually daffodil ect. It's not supposed to bring you fear but just kinda encouraging you to question all the things that you perceive as given truths.

I tried to make that sound cohesive but really it's such a big concept that I can't really wrap it up all nice and neat.

Oki. May and March are also important times.

Listen to your intuition and try not to take everything so seriously. I'm not saying to check out and go squat in the Himalayas but it's important to find joy in the now. Life is already tough enough so don't forget to watch a silly show that you like or change your hair to a style you've never tried, wear makeup in a very loud way. Just have fun and don't worry so much about things that you can't control. Listen to yourself and your intuition.

Well that was all over the place. Let's get on to the actual tarot part now.

For the record, the pictures are right to left.

January for the collective

We have the empress, the sun, 7 of swords and a fortune that says "act well your part; there the honor lies"

Hmm. Ngl I was a little confused to see the empress and the sun for January... I mean it hasn't been great. So I pulled clarity card 7 of swords. The 7 of swords is all about betrayal. It's about the deception and and actively getting away with things. This is people lying, cheating, sneaking and the works.

This makes much more sense!! The Sun card is usually about joy and success and happiness but in this case I see it as illuminating the betrayal. It's shining light on the deception and keeps the spotlight there. Its also an energetic card so I think that shows passion for uncovering the truth.

With the empress card too I think January is all about getting creative in all forms. Creative ways to protest, to mourn, to celebrate, to connect. Also taking in the abundance that we DO have. The beauty that surrounds us. I like to think of aphrodite energy for this. Its not just love and passion and creativity but is also asserting yourself and having strong passion for what you love and fighting for it. Did you know aphrodite was also called upon in ancient Greece in times of war? She was honored as a goddess of war but still a goddess of love, the sea, fertility ect. What I'm trying to say is that being a creative and "feminine" energy is in no way weak. Sometimes the most powerful things come from this energy. Love aggressively with good intentions. The point is that you should take whatever you're feeling and translate it into something creative or something you care about. The fact that covid is still a thing really sucks but take any rage, hurt, sadness, joy, love whatever and use that shit to make something amazing. Bake bread and punch the fuck out of it, paint your frustration, play hopscotch in higheels while you listen to heavy metal. You get the point.

Now January for BTS!!

We have the death card. (I only pulled one card bc I have things planned from this)

January has been... strange? To say the least.

This card can be a lot of things for them. I think this points to more maturity in their music? Like they've finally ditched the "shiny kpop boy band" label and are being taken seriously in the west. I also think that they're going through a musical/concept transformation~ I think it also signified the change in plans bc of the Grammys perhaps they had things planned an that fell through so they were forced to rapidly change plan/course.

For January: possible mixtape or announcement.

February for the collective

We have 8 of coins reverse and hanged man reverse.

The 8 of pentacles reverse talks a lot about self improvement. Doing that good good inner work and self care. Working on developing parts of you that you've maybe neglected. It's also learning how to work with how you are instead of wishing you weren't the way you are. If you have a therapist its a great time to maybe ask for any extra tips that you can practice daily to help you even more. Maybe exploring more into insecurities relating to finance or jobs or your passions. If you don't have a therapist but you have the means to get one I always highly recommend. You don't have to have "problems" to see a therapist. Everyone could use a non biased point of view that is literally trained to help you be you best self. If you can't get therapy, I get it. Shits tough rn but there's still things we can do to better ourselves like Journaling and reading therapy blogs or self help books (not the taky shit) or trying a hobby you fell out of touch with. There's also a lot of places where you can get therapy promise on the internet. Most importantly, better yourself in the way that you need. Take time in February to take notice of what you want to improve upon. The 8 of coins reversed does come with the warning not to get stuck in perfectionism. Go easy on yourself and if you find yourself getting frustrated when working on projects, try to take a step back and practice whatever it is in a fun way and then come back to it later

Hanged man reverse talks about knowing that you need to chill but you don't. You'll need too. Maybe you'll find yourself swept up in work and tasks and you're over whelmed and know you need to stop and catch your breath but you resist. Why? Well, perhaps you're trying to ignore reality by filling the empty spaces with things and stuff so you don't have to face what's bothering you. Not wise. Take time for yourself. There's also the flips side where people are just kinda stuck.. creative block. Maybe you want something to turn out one way and it just isn't, so your stuck and frustrated and can't move past it. Let go of your expectation of how it should be and let it be what it is. Go with the flow and maybe you'll see a new way to overcome your problem. You'll eventually get that break through that you need! The theme of February is about self improvement. Listen to yourself.

February for BTS

We have judgment.

Hehe yeah. This card is about rebirth and the inner calling. Letting go of the old to step into the new version of you. This is also a very spiritual card lol. This can talk about a new decision that you have to trust your gut on. This is a very significant card that screams comeback to me. It also can talk about sharing your struggles with a group of people and that to me sounds comeback ish. Maybe this will be an announcement in February, maybe they'll be working on it idk but this is ultimate comeback energy so I hope they utilize this for a big group project!!

February: possible BTS comeback (even my pendulum knows)

March for the collective

The chariot and justice

This plays directly off of February! With the chariot you're taking the self improvement that you've done and putting it to action! Now is the time to act on the dreams and passions that you have don't wait and hope for the best. March is about action and standing in your power.

Justice card is cause and effect and truth. What you do will have consequences good or bad. Not doing anything also has consequences. Cease the moment and make the best of it. You'll be taking responsibility for what you do. You start a business? Now you have the responsibility of running it and you get the credit. Stuff like that. Stand by your decisions with conviction and trust yourself.

There's also the side of justice that talks about bringing justice. If you've been wronged, you'll be brought justice if you stand up for yourself.

We also carry the continuous lesson of learning what we truly believe and challenge those beliefs!

March for BTS

Oki we have the hermit and the 6 of pentacles reverse.

Well... let's start with the 6 of pentacles reverse. This can really talk about being so generous and giving to everyone else that you forget about yourself. I think that maybe they might be over exerting themselves and giving so much that they're exhausted physically and emotionally as well. I think too, they take on so much of our pain like its their own? Idk but this would be a good time to do a large scale fan project to show them a little extra love!

With the hermit card it talks about a self introspection so they could be looking inward as a team and kinda evaluating their bond.

I also see this as maybe being alone as in they maybe can't physically go to the grammys? Or maybe they had been planning the rescheduled concerts and they had to be pushed back even further? Things like that. Regardless this signals re thinking/reevaluating the goals that they have and considering what direction to go in!

March: possible mixtape or solo project?

April for the collective

We have 6 of coins and 3 of cups reverse.

Let's start with the 6 of coins. It's about sharing. It can be about charity so sharing money via donation but also giving time, effort, energy to people as well. Giving knowledge is good too! It's an all round exchange. Maybe someone lends you money or you lend money to someone. It's give and take. It's a two way street. It's also a card of balanced finance. So money stuff should be looking promising around this time (for you U.S people this could point to more stimulus help as well)

And for the 3 of cups reversed... I see this as reopening of places and people struggling to find the balance. So think people who've been in lockdown celebrating by throwing a big party... yikes. This card reminds that we should be mindful of the long-term consequences that come with our actions.. maybe also people that are experiencing fear of being in public places now. This is only one facet though. Bc I think this also means in general, missing being with friends and having a renewed relationship because you've really realized how important it is to have these people that mean so much to you in your life. Don't forget that you have people that love you and want the best for you. Call them when you feel alone.

April for BTS

The heirophant

Mhmm. This one kinda gives me vibes that they'll be mentoring people? Idk but I see them more as the heirophant teaching what they've learned/ know to help guide others. HOWEVER this could also be them taking a new task under their belt. Learning something new. Since this is as a group reading I assume that this talks about the group as a whole. This card is also very tradition oriented so maybe they are taking lessons that are connected to traditional Korean culture? Maybe its for RUN or maybe its to incorporate into music and preformance. Think bts mma preformance but all of them learning together? Idk, it's just a thought (maybe wishful thinking). It also talks about seeking counseling so maybe they'll do yoongis idea from the most recent RUN.

This can also be them embracing this kind of leadership/ status.

April: I got nothing. It does feel like something though

May for the collective

Five of cups and queen of cups reversed

Five of cups is disappointment, regret and self pity. Now honestly this to me looks like possibly a tightening of restrictions yet again. Regardless of the situation that this is talking about, the best thing you can do is not wallow in the bullshit. You scrape yourself off the pavement and move foward. You'll need forgiveness of yourself and others and that if shit isn't going your way, you need to pull your head out of your ass and look around bc there's options out there. It's like drowning in a kiddie pool. Just stand up, dude. The water is like 5 inches.

Queen of cups reversed talks about self love and self care. It's more of that look inwards energy. Think about really taking care of yourself. May might be emotionally draining so you need to be ready to take care of you! Part of self care is making sure that your boundaries are well enforced.

Be on the look out for codependent behaviors. Check in with yourself.

The queen of cups is very intuitive and having it in reverse can talk about you not taking enough time to listen to it. Make an effort to meditate for like 5 minutes a day at least. Do something to let yourself connect to your intuition and higher self.

May for BTS

9 of pentacles

This about enjoying the fruits of your labor and absolute abundance and luxury. This could talk about them rolling in the dough after signing a new partnership or having a concert or something if the sort. This could also be a time where we see them buying new things like houses, cars and rings (lol) but also this could be them doing a very high production value project! Also namjoon and his bonsai army are thriving in this time!

May: possible concert or scheduled concert event. Activity of some kind.

Yoongi interlude

I asked for one card to give me an idea of what the mystical May 13th really is. I got: the star, 2 of cups, 4 of wands, the world and the sun.

Guys. I can't with this. 2 of cups is a card of union, romance, soulmate. 4 of wands is celebration, joy, homecoming, bliss. The world is completion and the sun is happiness, joy, marriage, enlightenment.

I've said it a billion times but that's some soulmate shit. So soft so cute and May will be eventful for his personal life.

June for the collective

Death and the heirophant reversed.

Wow wow wow death is transformation and a new chapter so a new way of life and something new/ different that changes how we see things. Again this could be relating to new covid things and new policies and stuff like that but also new as in new to all of us. Groundbreaking perhaps?

The heirophant reversed talks about teaching yourself. Being your own teacher and making your own path. This might be spiritual or otherwise. Challange what the world wants from you and instead listen to what you truly want bc you don't need anyone's approval. Continue to ask questions about why things are the way that they are.

June for BTS

Page of pentacles

Oki oki page of pentacles means a new creative venture and manifestation. Maybe something that they've been wanting for a while finally comes to fruition. This might be the start of a new project that they haven't done before or something cross genre? Idk but its a really good sign of being motivated for a new endeavor and manifesting any projects that they've ever wanted to do. Love this promising energy!!

June: idk

July for the collective

10 of swords and 9 of cups reversed.

10 of swords signals a painful ending. Also deceit. Its a necessary end to a long battle. The only thing you can do is control how you react in these situations. You just kinda gotta surrender into the pain and know that it's temporary. Take time to reflect on what happened and why and how it will help you grow.

The 9 of cups reversed talks about valuing stuff and material things over emotions and spiritual things. This can be talking about society in general, that we are becoming more aware to the fact that there is often more value placed on ephemeral items rather than humanity as a whole. This also can be talking about coming to the realization that we've been working so hard towards... something we don't really care about simply because we were told that it's what you do.

If you want something different to happen you have to put in effort. You can't be sitting in front of a water fountain being like, "damn. I'm thirsty. I really really want water so why isn't it in my mouth yet?" Like?? Hello? You have to take the first step, my dude.

Certainly don't try to do anything that would cost you finatial security or health.

You have the potential to find happiness within yourself. So try looking inside instead of looking outward.

July for BTS

4 of swords.

This is about rest and relaxation!

Taking time to meditate and take some time to look at what you've done objectively. Ots like the hermit in a way but much more focused on resting and relaxing so you can come back stronger and with better direction. Maybe they'll take a break for a couple days but I really see it as them reassessing options. Especially if July goes how I think it will. Maybe they'll film something like In The Soop again? Maybe we'll see bon voyage type thing? Idk. But it could be something kinda out of the spotlight? Maybe something more healing?

July: maybe something?? I'm not sure but it seems like something might be in store.

August for the collective

5 of coins and the wheel of fortune

Well let's see. 5 of pentacles talks about isolation and a negative mindset. This talks about falling on hard times but its a temporary set back. This energy can be talking about falling on hard times emotionally as well. In the card it shows a woman outside of a church shivering and cold but she's too busy thinking about all that she's lost that she doesn't notice the warm church that she could step into for shelter.

But then with he wheel of fortune that talks about fate/destiny, opportunity and luck so maybe this is a necessary loss so that a new door can open. This does kinda tie in with July as well. The end of something is painful but it's often a necessary thing. Might be a bit uncomfy but that's how things change. Again I see this maybe hinting more towards society but none the less it's definitely a theme for August to have doors closing and new ones opening so be on the lookout for that.

August for BTS

The devil.

Now don't fret. The devil talks a lot about choice. Most notably the choice between instant gratification and and something more substantial and the devil leans towards indulgence. It also has a lot to do with the shadow side. This could talk about ~scandal~ sure, but I think its more of a time where you become aware of negative patterns and you shine a light on that part you've ignored. On a much lighter note this card talks also about an incredible bond between people. It can be unhealthy if not given space or boundaries. Listen to pied piper and come back to me.

I also REALLY REALLY REALLY hope that this card points to this: sexuality. The boys have always been pretty pg when it comes to the topic of sex and embracing sexuality so I really do hope to see something more daring and grown up and exploring a tastefully sexy concept. On the same vain as sexuality this card also talks about kinks and stuff like that so don't be surprised if we get more outfits like fake love Era bondage harnesses.

August: ???

September for the collective

We have the world and 10 of wands reversed.

The 10 of wands reversed talks about carrying burden. Doing extra work and taking on more responsibility. Doing everything by yourself and carrying this heavy load alone will get you burnt out quicker than anything. You might be taking on too much and you'll need to prioritize what you really need to focus on. I also think there will just be a lot happening in September for a lot of people. It's a lot of working hard because you know it's good work or because it's what's right. This could be social responsibility that's placed on you or work responsibility. For whatever reason this burden isn't something you want to share with others because you think its yours alone to deal with. It's not though bc you'll figure out eventually that if it hurts so much you'll find a way to lessen the burden. 10 in tarot is all about the completion of a cycle and going through the wands cycle is hard work because for anything to be made of passion, you need to put the work behind it. The burden isn't forever, the heavy work load will lighten but this is you seeing things out. It's a good thing!

Especially considering this is paired with with world. The world is all about completion and that's what you're doing here is finding completion. You are seeing things out until the end but you just need to learn to give up some responsibility, lessen your burden.

This also talks about hard work being put into wider social spheres as well. Things like the vaccines becoming more widespread through the whole globe or at least better planing and infrastructures not related to covid. Things are looking up!

September for BTS

Knight of swords reverse

This bad boi is restless energy. It's being so pent up that you're ready to burst and you really want to take action but you can't because something is keeping you from taking that action. Again I do think this is kinda covid related in regards to touring bc if they do tour in 2021 its gonna look a lot different. This energy can be a bit impulsive and directionless so I think maybe they'll channel this into album material something? I'm not really sure tbh. I'm suprised this energy didn't show up earlier because it almost seems inevitable.

September: no clue

October for the collective

Ten of coins and the star reverse.

Welp let's start with the 10 of coins. Its about wealth, financial security, and long term success so this is a pretty prosperous time. This talks about the obvious monetary wealth and material wealth but also an abundance of opportunities. So this is definitely a good time to enjoy whatever consistency you have. This energy is really really abundant in the career space as well. So October could be very prosperous in the job field and you'll have likely found what it is you really want and could be successful at. This could be the actual act or just the idea. This is could also talk about investing in something for your future, this could be time or money.

With the star reversed it can talk about a loss of faith and a disconnection. This often points to feeling like you've just been forgotten or left out. Like the universe doesn't give a shit about you and left you out to die. Things might seem unfair but always try to look for the lesson that you can take from the experience. Seeing the 10 of coins and the star makes me think that a lot of people have kinda lost faith in their manifestations and also just in the concept of not living in a state of need. Especially if you see other people doing well and you've been trying so fucking hard but you haven't gotten a break. I know we hate to hear it but this can serve as a test of faith. Or rather an opportunity to get your shit in line and take a second to breath. Do something good for yourself and then continue on. This star in reverse serves to show you what no longer sparks joy and helps you find what does and what that initial spark was in the first place. Helps you get back to the original vision/ spark.

October for BTS

5 of pentacles reverse.

This signals the end of difficult times and getting that groove back. The last month was restless energy with no where to go but this month that energy is certainly put to good use. They might be figuring out what has been missing In their lives and starting to rectify that. They are definitely reminded that material wealth doesn't bring spiritual or emotional wealth. Might be also feeling a bit alienated too.

October: something is likely but idk

November for collective

Six of swords reversed and the moon.

Transition and change is prevalent. The 6 of swords is about leaving behind the familiar. Maune this is leaving a job, a new change in the status quo, leaving a relationship ect. The thing you have to keep in mind is just how amazing this is in terms of what it will do. It will alow growth!! And bring clarity!! Thos can also be societal as well, something being left behind in favor of something new. It's letting go and reflecting so that you can move foward.

This is strengthened by the moon card. The moon card is the subconscious and all the things that come with it. The anxiety, the illusion, the uncertainty. You'll want to deal with whatever emotions come up. The moon can signify a confusing time where things aren't what they seem to be. That's the illusions so you'll have rely more on intuition at a time like this. Your dreams might hold significance in this time as well. Listen to your guides and your own guidance because it will help you understand more than you did before this journey began. Using moon cycles to your advantage in November might really help you!!

November for BTS

7 of wands

Challenge and competition. People are envious of bts. We know this. But people will be challenging them for what they've gained: music industry domination. This might co.e in the way that people will spread vicious rumors in attempt to disenfanchise or possibly it will be a fair fight. It could also be a challenge/ battle for some other aspect that involves legal matters.

My best guess though is good old competition. Bts has proven again and again that they will continue to do what they do how they do but they will not be trampled over. In the best way this could renew some of that spirit in friendly competition. They will tear eachothers throats out for a pack of ramen so maybe a bit of competition will be good for them. It keeps life intresting.

November: nothin

December for the collective

Two of cups and the emperor!

Let's start off with the emperor card talks about stability and order. It can also signify being the "breadwinner" so its a good sign that you'll kinda be on top of your shit. The emperor is also an amazing leader so you might find yourself taking on a leadership role too! This is very organized energy that works very smoothly!

two of cups is such a lovely way to end out the year! It's love and partnership and attraction so if you aren't in a relationship by this time you might meet someone who strikes your fancy!! On a none romantic relationship note though, this card is also great for business partnership bc it signifies that you're on the same page and have the same goals in mind!

It's harmonious relationships and trust between them!! Love love love this energy so much! Cups are the suit of emotions and this card is so promising.

If you are in a relationship, this can talk about "falling in love all over again" like you're just reminded of how good they are.

December for BTS

Queen of cups

Intuition, creativity and emotional stability. They're using intuition to guide their moves foward with emotional maturity. They are in a place of knowing what they want and why. This would be a good time to work on an album or a book or to release them. The queen of cups is like the friend that you can tell absolutely anything and somehow they have a helpful answer. This card is really calm and it can also talk about subconscious thoughts.

I think that bts is maybe making more of a conscious effort to make sure that what they do is just as emotionally fulfilling for them as it is for us! They might be kinda pondering the future at this time and considering if this is what fills their emotional cup!

December: possibly a thing?

Now these cards are the vibe of the year and some advice.

For the collective (on the left)

Three of swords and judgment reverse.

The fortune says "accept the challenges, so that you may feel the exhilaration of victory"

The 3 of swords is about disappointment and hurt and heartbreak. It's about the emotional release that we all need when shit gets tough. Don't pretend to be strong. If you need to cry, fucking cry. This year is about letting go of expectations and do what you have to do to release so you can move foward and not have these things pile up.

You have to make an effort to not let yourself take on what other people think of you. You aren't defined by what some asshole says. You define yourself.

Judgment reverse is about self doubt and ignoring your path. It's being stagnant and being harsh on yourself. This year has a focus on building yourself up and noticing when you are not. Bring light to the things that are holding you back without harsh judgment for yourself. You can't beat yourself up. If you make a bad decision you know not to make it again. Take accountability and move on.

The oracle card is inner temple.

Seriously all the focus of this year is in self improvement and dear god, please take time to work on yourself spiritually!!! Everything you want to know is there if you take the time to listen. This should be a place where you feel safe and welcome. It definitely should not feel like something you HAVE to do.

For BTS

10 of swords and page of swords

The fortune says "you create your own stage. The audience is waiting" (how tje fuck?? This is the perfect fortune)

The 10 of swords is a painful but necessary end. This is accepting the current situation. They maintain focus for 2021 for them is adapting and keeping their spirits up.

With the page of swords it talks about new ideas and that kind of creativity. It's also a lot about communication so I really think that they'll be figuring out new ways to connect and new projects that will be prosperous.

The oracle card is Pleiades

This is what we talk about all the time. Bts has helped so many people want to be better and do better. They are uplifting humanity and giving people a sense if belonging. Bts finds you when you need them most 💜💜💜

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wow I had to write this up over 2 days bc this was so fucking long. I need a nap. Idk if I'll proof read this before I post it so don't hate me for the mistakes (honestly, there's like 10,000 spelling and grammar mistakes in my other posts too 🙃)

I hope you guys enjoyed it and maybe this will be helpful to to have a forecast of some possible energy for you to look out for!!

Also bts bc I love them. I have another bts 2021 reading I'll do soon too!

Hope you guys are happy and well 💜

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bthump · 4 years ago

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Do you think there is anything Griffith could do at this point to stop Guts from his revenge quest? It's highly unlikely that it would happen in the context of the story, but I'm just curious if there could be another way. Would Guts be capable to forget Griffith at this point?

lol ngl I legit think that NGriff showing up and just saying “Hey so turns out I actually failed my feelings test on the Hill of Swords, I’m still in love with you after all, wanna join the Hawks again?” would do it. Guts would spend 2 seconds wondering if he’s fucking with his head and then Griffith would Look at him and Guts would be like, “yeah.”

Or yk, just “I realized I still want you, Guts.” boom, friendship ended with revenge, now Griffith is my best friend again.

I actually completely think that Guts’ revenge campaign was like, half-assed at best, not something he’s ever been genuinely committed to, and pretty much just a way to get Griffith’s attention again. I have some posts that get into that point further, but basically it’s in the way Guts can’t finish his “when I see him again I’ll-” thought most of the time, it’s in how he still sees Femto/NGriff as a True Light, it’s in how he forgets his urge to kill, it’s in how the moments that really upset Guts post-Eclipse are when he sees Femto and NGriff again and they say “lol idc about you anymore,” how Guts fucking moped about Griffith abandoning him after the Hill of Swords, like, this is not a dude who is actually committed to killing this guy.

Like Guts is not ideologically or morally opposed to NGriff. He doesn’t care about Falconia or Fantasia, he’s not out to protect people from evil overlord Griffith or w/e lol. And he’s not even avenging Casca and the rest of the Hawks - he tells himself he is, but in chapter 130 he pretty much admits to himself that he’s just lashing out.

Guts wants 2 things in his life: to kill shit when he’s mad and for Griffith to look at him, and his revenge campaign was his attempt to get both.

SO BASICALLY YEAH I think Griffith admitting Guts still has his attention would completely derail the revenge thing.

I mean to be perfectly fair I think to make it work in fic or something Guts would still have like, a lot of inner conflict lol. You could make a p good argument that the “get Griffith’s positive attention” ship has sailed thanks to the eclipse rape as well as NGriff saying he has no regrets (tho considering how easily Miura ignores it when it comes to eg the aforementioned Guts moping when NGriff takes off it’s also easy to argue the opposite imo), and now the only attention Guts wants is for Griff to look into his eyes as Guts stabs him or w/e. Personally if I was writing this scenario I’d take an extra step and make Guts go beast of darkness and do something unforgiveable like murder Isidro before this happens so he can go “fuck it I’m a monster too now we might as well be monsters together.” Just because I think it would be easier to justify as in character lol. Miura seems to ignore the eclipse rape half the time while writing the post-eclipse story but fandom doesn’t really so, yeah.

But yeah idk it’s not a hard sell for me that if Griffith admitted he’s still hung up on Guts then Guts’ urge to kill him would disappear, never to be seen again.

BUT ALL THAT SAID re: that last bit, no I don’t think Guts could actually get over Griffith and forget him. My answer so far is only shifting Guts’ obsession back to wanting to be Griffith’s bff/fuck him, because I don’t think there’s a single thing Griffith could do to make Guts like, lose interest in him and move on.

He’s been obsessing over a single glance across a vast plain since he got on the boat. Maybe if he’d never laid eyes on him again after Griffith’s “I am over you, and that, my friend, is what they call closure” moment on the Hill of Swords he’d have had a tiny chance of moving on eventually, but imo Griffith looking at him intently is a one hit KO for Guts’ chances of getting over him. Like idk maybe if he encountered Griffith one more time only for Griffith to reiterate being totally over him for real and then they never saw each other again and also Casca ran away with Farnese and he never saw her again either eventually Guts would fuck Serpico and start to move on? But even then he’d still know Griffith is out there in the world doing stuff ~where his sword can reach~ and he’d probably hear about him occasionally since he’s now ruler of remaining civilization so...

Mmmaybe if NGriff went back to being Femto on the astral plane out of sight and out of mind and inhuman and unreachable? Or if he, like, died and Guts could maybe finally start to mourn the human version of him since he’s fully gone now? Even then it would take years and years and a lot of positive influences around him imo, and I still wouldn’t bet on Guts moving on lol, he’d be more likely to go back to aimlessly fighting monsters to cope with his feelings til something killed him.

#ty for the ask! it's an interesting question #ask #b #a #character: guts #theme: revenge #theme: true light #Anonymous #ship: griffguts #headcanons #character thoughts

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emachinescat · 4 years ago

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II've decided to watch MacGyver from the beginning (again), and I'm live tweeting the experience with every tweet tagged with #savemacgyver. I thought it would be fun to share my collected thoughts from the episodes on here as well.

My Thoughts on S1E3, "Awl"

You're not only going to make it to 30, Mac, but you're going to make it to season 6. #savemacgyver

I love that Jack's bucket list includes finishing the Harry Potter books. Guess he's not a one-trick pony after all with sci-fi. A healthy blend of science fiction and fantasy is just what the doctor ordered.

Dylan Thomas reference! That poem was written about the poet's own father, and is about how everyone, no matter who they are or what they stand for, fights against death in the end. He's begging his dad to "rage, rage against the dying of the light," to not give in to death so easily, to keep fighting. Just taught this poem, actually, so I'm vibing with this reference super hard. Though to be fair, I'd be vibing with it anyway. Love Dylan Thomas.

Oh my gosh, this is the one with the fire extinguisher and inflatable escape! I'd forgotten which episode that came from, but I see GIFs of it all over Tumblr. Poor Mac especially, that looks like it hurts. Why is Lucas Till so good at being whumped?!

Jack hugging the fire extinguisher: Iconic.

I'll never get tired of seeing that polar bear! Do we know if he has a name?

I cannot get over how small and excited Bozer is, not a care in the world except for his movie. It's exciting to think about what's to come for his character growth, though I do wish he wouldn't have to go through all the things he does. :(

Jack's conversations with his dad at the grave are just everything. And I feel cheated that we haven't gotten to see Mac have the same kind of conversations at Jack's grave (though I firmly believe it's a regular occurrence off-screen).

Seriously, the way he talks to his dad is so familiar, so comfortable, so natural. It's like Daddy Dalton is right there with him and it fills me with so many emotions that I can't even.

The smile on Jack's face and the pride in his voice when he talks about Mac to his dad is the purest thing ever.

Also, that's a big-ass tombstone Jack is leaning against.

"Hi, Mr. Dalton. How's... life?" MAC! 😂

I can't tell you how much I love it when other characters talk about how smart Mac is. "He's a genius..."

First mention of Mac's dad. It's sweet how invested Jack is in Mac rebuilding his relationship with his old man. Also, I really wish we would have gotten a flashback of Jack's dad at some point. He seems like such an amazing man.

"If I could have one more day to sit and talk to my dad instead of that hunk of rock, I'd do anything." Jaaaaaaack 😭😭😭

Good old Ralph Kastrati. Single-handedly the most annoying character in all of cable television. Y'all have no idea what you're getting into with this one, dream team.

PUNCHFACE.

"My mom dated a guy like that once." Ouch. I'm about to start a Riley Zinger Counter for each episode. Her comebacks are 🔥

It's not just his face, Jack. Everything about this dude is punchable. Especially the way he says "yo."

Ewwww tightie whities no thanks imma head hom now byyye

Mac just snatched that can right out of Jack's hand as he was about to take a drink. Classic.

If I didn't hate Ralph before (spoiler: I did), then I extra hate him for the foie gras comment.

Yes, Jack, "asshat" is the perfect descriptor for this guy.

Is Mac seriously about to just make him some noise-canceling headphones? Who am I kidding? Of course he is.

I need more of Mac punching people in the face. For science.

Poor Jack didn't get to punch the punch face.

🎵 Snipers gonna snipe, snipe, snipe, snipe, snipe 🎵

Between the foie gras and the calfskin, they are really making this guy so easy to hate just sayin'.

"As soon as you're done saving his life, I'm gonna kill him, you hear that, smart-ass? I'm already dressed for the funeral." 🤣🤣🤣🤣

"He's g-good. He just... got kinda shot." Is that the medical terminology, Mac?

Jack using country music as a form of torture 🤣

"You're going to be seeing Yelp stars if you don't shut up!"

Have I mentioned how much I love the music in this show?

"I don't wanna die listening to country music!"

I love how bossy and grabby Mac gets when he improvises.

Another belt grab! I can’t get over Jack trying to keep his crazy partner from falling out of the window – it gives me life!

Actually makes me wonder if he does it because Mac’s taken a tumble out of a car window before. *fanfic brain engaged*

“You know how I feel about your puns.” C’mon, Mac, pus are the greatest forms of humor, bar-pun. (Geddit?)

Mc made a C in biology? I’m not buying it.

Dwwwwwww the sounds of the surgery. No thanks.

Though I will say this is one of the coolest (albeit grossest) things Mac’s ever done on this show.

What the heck is with that elevator door? It took a whole 10 years to close! I wouldn’t trust it. (To be fair, I don’t trust any elevator, but that’s neither here nor there.)

Sir Bleeds-a-Lot lol

Riley stepping in and taking charge once again. No idea how these two functioned before she came along.

Some seriously cool MacGyverisms in this episode. The whole process of “killing” Ralph and bringing him back with office supplies is so OG MacGyver and it gives me all the warm fuzzies.

Ralph: “You’re not a scientist, you’re not a doctor. So how the hell do you know all this stuff?” Mac: “...I read a lot of books?” I love Mac so much.

“Now go die.” Lolololol

The moment with Ralph wanting to call his mom and grow the hell up is surprisingly genuine and heartbreaking. Character development for a character in only one episode, hello, is that you?

“He’s dead, but he’ll get better.” MacGyver, 2016

Riley’s comeback about Jack’s plan to take out six guys if Mac takes out two is another winner. (Riley: 2, Jack: 0) Still, I love the whole, “Sure it does [count as a plan]. First, I’ll take two. Then, I’ll take the other four.” This is why Mac is the plan guy, not Jack.

“Or I can take them all out.” Mac’s confidence = 🔥

I might need to start a Mac sass counter too. Jack: “You seriously want me to put this on my face?” Mac: “Only if you like breathing.”

Jack’s left fist getting jealous 🤣

They really liked choking Mac in the early episodes, didn’t they? Not that I’m complaining. Actually, why did that stop? That strangled, panicked cry of “JACK?!” is music to my fanfic writing, hurt/comfort obsessed, whump-loving soul.

That cough - it actually hurts me to hear it! They should have given us some more repercussions or aftercare for Mac breathing in that gas!

Ralph fell asleep. Of course.

“You know, it’s weird. I’m glad he’s alive… but I still want to kill him. 🤣 I’m with Jack on this one!

Ralph: “A fresh start. I could use one of those right?” Riley: “Or a whole new personality.” ZZZING!!! Riley: 1 million, the world: -10

Oh he did not just call Riley “little hottie.” I’m back to wanting to kill him, character development be darned. So diminutive, dehumanizing, and objectifying. This guy has more than won the douchebag lottery. Riley can more than stick up for herself, but still. The way he speaks to her here makes me feel all kinds of gross.

He just said “ya heard” unironically. Can we let Jack punch him now, please?

Jack offering to let Ralph keep the cash he lifted if he gets to punch him is great, but even better is Mac and Riley offering to chip in money for The Cause.

Oh, yeah, Bozer was in this episode. I’m excited for when he is utilized more!

Bozer’s monster Mac is nightmare fuel!

“A letter? That you put in the mail? It’s 2016.” Hey, as someone who has an actual, old-school type pen pal, step off, Jack.

Mac: “You just gonna watch?” Jack, offended: “Not anymore.” How is it Jack is like Mac’s dad but they also bicker like 5-year-olds? This relationship is so strange, so wonderful, and the heart of the show in so many ways. I love them.

Mac’s words of wisdom about the nature of life are actually super encouraging and exactly what I needed to hear today.

I’d forgotten how much I love this episode – t’s so fun! Although the Codex storyline in season 4 is probably my favorite plot-wise, coming back to these early episodes is like a breath of fresh air! Excellent, excellent episode with so much to offer!

What are your thoughts on "Awl?" I'd love to discuss! :)

#macgyver #jack dalton #riley davis #wilt bozer #macgyver rewatch #my thoughts #episode review #save macgyver #we can still save our show #emcatreviews #spoilers #s1e3 #awl

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