#halloween thirty plus 20

[bunnys-kisses]

team principal

max verstappen - team principal au

cw: smut/pwp, driver!reader, team principal!max, age gap (20/45), power dynamic, (slight) bratty behavior, groping, driver's room sex, oral sex (max receives)

as requested by anon: Driver!reader asking team principal max verstappen for a custom line of all pink and feminine merch because the orange just “washes her out” so he does. And he goes ALL out, bright pink Verstappen Racing flare leggings, and baby tee’s with the MV logo plastered on the chest bc what she wants she gets.

like the fic? leave a comment! really like the fic? suggest your own! <3

being part of verstappen racing meant wearing their logo. it had been the logo that max verstappen himself raced with. the 'm' and the 'v' were known prior to the establishment of the f1 team. every team had their logo from ferrari's stallion to red bull's, well, bulls. even teams like hamilton motorsports had their logo.

the problem with max verstappen's merch wasn't the logo, it was how god awful ugly it was. you had a selection of some of the ugliest merch on the planet. why was it all orange?

you had been convinced that your team principal, your boss, only saw the world through orange hues. that was everything was a shade of orange so awful that it would make mclaren blush!

"this is ugly. this is ugly. this is somehow worse! this looks like a halloween collection rather than actual merch. mister verstappen you make more money than anyone i know, hire someone with design sense!" you shook the shirts in your hand.

you knew that almost every driver on the grid couldn't talk to their boss like that. but it was an poorly kept secret that max verstappen had a soft spot for you. he also fucked you two ways to sunday on a weekly, if not daily basis.

max chuckled and leaned back a little in his office chair, "brand integrity is important, schat. a recognizable brand is important to its value."

you made a face, "well, your brand looks like spirit halloween threw up all over the place." then put the items down forcefully. you put your hands on your hips, "and shouldn't brands take risks? try something new? all of you use the same colours, cuts and styles. it's boring!"

max asked, "then what do you have in mind? since you know so much about a brand. i've been doing this since i was seventeen. almost thirty years, schat. longer than you've known how to walk let alone drive." he raised his eyebrows, "since you know so much, dazzle me with your proposal."

max would let his precious driver bark like a yapping dog. but he knew how to keep you quiet. he watched you cower for a moment, realizing that you took it a step too far. max smiled with his face rested against his fist.

you swallowed, "maybe something a little more... feminine.. pink. something cute." you leaned forward at his desk a little, the shirt you wore was his and was a little big on you. your movements revealed the start of a hickey he left on your shoulder the night prior, "mister verstappen, you have the first female driver in a long time. we... could lean into that a little. make it cute!"

max leaned forward in his chair and rested his arms on his desk, "cute? verstappen racing is supposed to imposing. strength on the track, and you want pink." he chuckled a little, "the alternate logo besides the initials is a lion. lions aren't cute."

you looked at him, "what about that lion stuffed animal you got me? that's cute. i sleep with it every night." you then pouted a little, a look that always made max weak. you shrugged your shoulders a little as you had your hands behind your back. you swayed a little and suggested, "plus, i could model it as well."

max may have known how to shut you up, but you knew how to make the older man weak in the knees. he sighed and kept his gaze on you, his expression a little softer, "fine. we'll see what we can do, schat. maybe you're right about needing to do something a little different. but i hope you know, whatever item we end up with. you have to show off for me."

your pout dropped and was replaced with a smile. you leaned over the desk to be closer to him and kissed him on the mouth. you held his face and smiled against the kiss. when you eventually pulled away, max watched your turn around to skip out of his office. you said to him as you looked over your shoulder, "thank you, mister verstappen."

-

max verstappen had seen enough in his over forty years on this planet. he had seen many beautiful women over the years, but when he walked into your driver's room and saw you in the newest verstappen merch, he almost fell on his ass. he had seen the line of merch before it got into your hands, but to see you in them was another story.

you were in a pink skirt from home that was almost the exact colour of the baby pink of the baby tee that you were wearing. laid out on the couch of the room was the rest of the merch. the flare leggings, the bucket hat, the baseball cap, a form fitting tank top and even an oversized button up.

all in sickening baby pink.

so much for verstappen being predators on the track. not when you were sickeningly beautiful in the clothing. max held onto the door to the room for a moment to compose himself before he stepped in and shut the door loudly behind him.

"oh!" you perked up as you turned away from the mirror to look at your boss. you smiled at him, "hello, sir." seeing the logo of the team across your tits made his eyes go wide.

"hi." he said as he swallowed, "did they give you the wrong size?" he stepped forward and reached out for you, "and where did you get this skirt?"

you smiled, "oh! this is supposed to be my right size. that's just how the tee are!" he could see your curves and a bit of your stomach. you then added, "and the skirt is from home. i bought it for a matching outfit thing." you swayed your hips from side to side.

this was supposed to be your outfit for media day. something to show off the brand. max scratched the back of his neck and stepped forward. he placed his hands on your hips and gazed at you.

"you're not going out like this. no, no. there has to be something else to wear." he approved all of the items. he saw them from concept to final product. and now you were in the driver's room looking like a whore.

"what about it?" you pouted.

he pulled at the bottom of your shirt and you yelped as it was taken over your head. he made a small disappointed noise as he tossed the shirt to the side. he licked his lips at the sight of your breasts. this was beyond any code violation. if you two got caught. but it was better than you walking around the media section in that shirt.

"you look like you're selling sex rather than the brand! you look like a whore." he said as he held onto your hips. he could feel the leap in his chest at the sight of your breasts on full display for him. only for him.

"doesn't sex sell, mister verstappen?" you said as you pouted a little and you were pulled up against him. your hands on the front of his button up, with his logo on it. you spread your hand across his chest, he noticed that your nails were painted the same pretty pink as the merch. you held onto him as he took you by the ass to press up against him.

"not this kind of sex. this is an invitation for you to cause problems. what if that skirt flips up? what if your nipples poke through the shirt. what is the press got the wrong idea and thought you were a slut." he explained. he spoke like you were a bratty girl who needed to be scolded. to be taught the right way.

you pouted further, "i'm not a slut."

max pushed up your pink tennis skirt over your ass and grabbed handfuls of your ass. it made you yelp and max closed in the space between your lips. before he kissed he said, "i know you're not. but, when you dress like this, you look like one." then kissed you deeply.

his strong hands groped your ass as you felt his cock up against your middle. you shuddered at the feeling of it. you knew that max was quite big. you squirmed a little against him and kissed him deeper.

when he pulled away, he got you down on the couch roughly. you bounced a little and looked up at him. you stuck your chest out a little more and max looked down at you as he rubbed his cock through his slacks. for one of the top racers in the world, you sure looked beautiful below him.

"mister verstappen." you said before you were met with his cock in your face. you didn't say much else but rather wrapped your lips around his cock and let him hold the back of your head. you placed your hands on his strong thighs for support as you took his cock as deep as you could take it.

max shuddered at the feeling of you. you felt like a dream in his grasp. a beauty beyond all others. despite the age gap and the power dynamics, max knew that he could make you top of the grid. you'd be winning championships that would make other drivers jealous.

as you sucked his cock, max saw your future. world champion of formula one. pretty trophies in your apartment in monaco. he already had you in a multi-year contract and no clause to get out of it. first wear the verstappen racing logo then have the verstappen last name. only fitting for a champion after all.

a strong driver needs a strong last name. and as you looked up at him with that soft gaze of yours he panted a little heavier. all dolled up for him, in his merch. you were right about the need for cuter clothes, that orange washed you out. you looked cuter in the soft pinks.

"you look good like this." he said as he tapped your nose and you made a playful noise. too precious, too beautiful for him. he loved the sight of you seated with his cock in your mouth.

you continued to suck him off and max got both hands in your hair. he pressed you up against him a little tighter and let your throat clench around his cock. he remembered the first time you sputtered and coughed when he came in your mouth. but now you took it all like the champion he knew you were.

"you're going to do so well for the press." he said, "answer all their questions. be a good girl. you know you will be. just like you are now, taking me so beautifully." he patted your cheek lovingly before he pulled you further onto his cock once more.

he watched you shudder against him as you tried to take his entire length. you could almost feel his pubic hair against your nose as you whined against him. you whined a little bit from the back of your throat and continued to suck him off. you brought him pleasure that made the team principal see stars.

he cupped your face in those large hands for a moment, "you like that don't you? having me in your throat, you're so beautiful. i don't know if anyone told you about the bidding war to get you on my team." your eyes fluttered shut and he exhaled deeply, "had to play dirty."

you whimpered in response. you didn't know about the bidding war for you a year earlier. you knew that you had a few offers when you ended up in formula one.

those blue eyes looked down at you and max licked his lips. you could feel his gaze on you as he continued to rock up into your throat. he panted a little, he could feel his shirt cling to his toned back from the sweat. "not easy to get under hamilton's skin. but i got him to back off, the same with red bull. i only wanted the best and i got it. now she's sucking my cock and wearing my logo."

you whined a little bit and it was music to max's ears. you were his prize. your teammate was good too, but max didn't hear church bells when he was around. you were max's pet project, that he just simply happened to fuck often.

he'd make you a champion. team principals played favourites all the time, and max in a way was no better than them. at least max got something else out of it. those pretty soft lips around his cock. he held onto you tightly as he continued to thrust into your mouth.

you clung to him as you could feel the ache in your throat. you kept your eyes closed and you were wet between the thighs. max briefly got more aggressive with his thrusts before he finished in your mouth. you whimpered and swallowed it eagerly.

the salty taste in your mouth was familiar and you opened your eyes to look at your boss. when you pulled your mouth off of his cock. you kissed the tip and smiled at him a little.

if max had more time, he'd be making a full mess of you. but the press would want to see the star of the track soon enough. he rubbed his cock up against your lips and nose before he said, "i want you to wear the merch next time i fuck you. you're mine, got it?"

you nodded softly and said, "yes, mister verstappen. always."

when you did the interview, you still wore the outfit. despite protests from your boss. you were all smiles for the camera, but max lingered close by. just in case someone got the wrong idea. as if max's name and logo weren't plastered across your pretty tits. but, it did get the older man thinking as he watched from a short distance.

max's mind wandered to other ways to have you wear his logo. he wondered if collars and chokers were still popular with young women. he wondered if he could get you in something with a tag with his name on it. maybe it wouldn't be sold as merch for the public, but he wouldn't mind if his star driver wore it. <3

[cross-word]

Secret lovers

Ethan Landry x Male reader

Ethan and you have been friends since kindergarten, you’ve been hiding a secret from not knowing he might have the same secret

Word count: 1.5k

You groaned, throwing your head back “what’s wrong with you now” Ethan asked, “I hate homework I hate so much” you say putting your arms over your eyes. You remove your hand and look towards him and you could’ve swore your heart skipped a beat.

You and Ethan have been friends since kindergarten, you remember when you started to like him it was sophomore year in high school, it was raining hard and you forgot your umbrella. You were ready to use your backpack as an umbrella for the 20 minute walk to your house.

“Why are you staring at me, do I have something on my face” he said, opening his phone, you never had the courage to tell him, always scared your best friend would be weirded out by your crush.

You tried to keep your crush from anyone until your roommate Anika got you drunk one night and got you to spill who you had eyes on. Which resulted in Anika drunkenly telling her girlfriend Mindy and her telling Tara, Tara telling Quinn. You never showed interest in any guy who asked you out so when they found out you liked someone they freaked out.

Except for Mindy and Quinn they were disgusted Quinn was disgusted you liked her brother and Mindy just straight up didn’t like Ethan and thought you could do better.

Tara and Anika have been trying to get you to ask Ethan out, but you would never cross that line with your best friend.

‘Come to the Halloween party with us’ you read Tara’s text ‘plus we already got you a costume, it was supposed to be for chad but he’s going as a cowboy instead’ you sighed you hated parties, “are you going to the Halloween party” you asked Ethan, sitting on his bed “yeah I’m making my own costume the store doesn’t have the one I want” he said still typing away.

You texted Tara back agreeing to come, you laid next to Ethan having your head touching the side of his body you felt his hand on your head “are you going to sleep” he asked you nod “wake me up in thirty minutes” you say, starting to doze off.

You knew you never had a chance with Ethan so you would rather push the best friend boundary until you couldn’t anymore.

Few weeks later while getting ready for the party. You hear screams around Tara’s apartment as everyone tries to get a little buzz before leaving. You’ve been staring at your costume for 30 minutes where the hell was the shirt you walk out of Tara’s bedroom, “hey Tara where’s the shirt for the costume” she looks at you weird “this is Halloween you know the day where you can be slutty without people judging” she says.

You looked at the vodka bottle on the table “you’re lucky you have the doctor blazer, that was chad’s outfit he wasn’t even going to wear it” she says chugging another shot.

Giving up, you wait for Chad and Ethan to show up finally hearing a knock you stand up and open the door, Chad walks past you and straight towards Tara.

Ethan stares at you, he knew you weren’t the most comfortable being shirtless, you two sat down on the couch you catch Ethan looking at you “it’s too much right” you ask him.

Ethan laughs “are you kidding Chad is literally half naked with pants and a hat on, you're modest compared to him” he says he watched you hold your stomach “here I heard you were getting Chad's old costume” he says bringing out a white shirt.”I knew it didn’t have a shirt so I brought you one, it matches with your costume” he smiles.

You ran to grab it out of his hand, hugging Ethan “you’re a lifesaver Ethan” blurting out thanks before taking off the blazer and quickly putting on the shirt he just gave you, “that’s way better” you say sitting down again.

Arriving at the party everyone split, you didn’t know where to go so you stayed with Ethan, you two drank 2 beers before quitting. You hate being drunk, it always makes you insecure about everything and tonight wasn’t any different.

You didn’t know how long you’ve been looking at Ethan’s side profile but you notice he didn’t realize you were looking. You turn your head to see a girl, she was gorgeous, she was dressed like a female Harry Potter glasses and all.

You felt your heart drop. You knew you never had a chance with him so why do you still hold out hope you two would get together. “Do you like her” you asked throwing Ethan out of his trance “huh” he looked at you confused “the girl your staring do you like her” you ask him staring at her “oh you noticed, yeah she’s amazing she’s in my Econ class she’s so smart but” he was going to continue when your cut him off “ask her out” you say.

“What no, no way” he says putting his hands up “come on I’ll help you” you say dragging him towards her “hey this is my friend ethan his in your econ class and he was wondering if you’d be down to talk with him” pushing him towards her she let an awkward wave he did the same. When they started to talk you slowly walked away watching from afar.

“Why’d you do that” you turn to your left to see anika “do what” you ask her “set ethan up with that girl” she says staring at them you see them laugh and joke and you see ethan smile his smile that made you faint the smile where you would fight thousands of zombies just for him to have it.

“Look at them, he's so happy” you say not realizing you were crying “I never had a chance anyways” you say looking back “are you sure this is what you want” Anika asked, you nod “I need to move on from my crush on him if I’m ever going to watch him date someone else” you watched as Anika left and walked back to Mindy.

You were left to yourself you focused on Ethan and her, the music being tuned out it was just you and Ethan in a room he looked up his smile fades when he saw you. You saw as he rushed towards you leaving the girl without hesitation.

“Hey, why are you crying, are you okay, do you want to leave, we can leave if you want to” he says pulling you into a hug and holding you close.

“Yeah can we go back to the apartment” he nods as he walks you out of the frat house, you two were walking in silence with Ethan holding your hands when he was pulled back. By you stopping suddenly he turns towards you with tears down your eyes.

“What’s going on with you, why're you crying so much” he says wiping the tears off your face “I’m in love with you Ethan, I’ve been in love with you since highschool I love you so much” you say putting your head in the crook of his neck.

“I know you’ll never love me but I can’t stand watching you with someone else, I don’t even know if you like guys” you say sniffling you felt him hold you “is that why you’ve been crying” he ask you nod into his neck “I love you too Y/N, I thought you didn’t like me so I forced myself to have a crush on her” he says kissing your face.

He pulls away to see your face covered in tears “are you serious” watching snot run down your face he reaches into his pockets and wipe your nose “yes, I’m serious I am in love with you more than you ever know” he says looking your eyes, you two look into each other's eyes for who knows how long and he pulls in you in for a kiss.

You two continue to kiss under the street light of the park not stopping until you hear claps Ethan looks up to see your guys friend groups Ethan holds you close as he closes his eyes “I love you Ethan”

Ethan was knocked out of his day dreaming when he heard the door opening and watched as two dogs ran up to him in the living room. He watches as you walk in “I didn’t know you were here, I thought you had a meeting” you ask sitting down next to him.

“The meeting got cancelled and it was going to be an all day meeting so today I got a break and I wanted to spend it with my amazing husband” Ethan says kissing your neck pinning you to the couch.

He stays on top of you just hugging you “I love you Y/N” you laugh wrapping your arms around him “I love you too Ethan” kissing his nose.

[fashournalist]

Before October leaves, I just want to look back at how wonderful and eventful my birth month has been, whether it was in my work life, family, friendships, and spiritual life.

Thank You Lord Jesus for authoring these memories, and for the people I spent this month with. I am surrounded with so much love, and just like the song I kept on playing when I turned 21, “I could not ask for more.”

I just turned 29, and it feels like it’s all coming full circle. A part of me is still in 2015, a part of me is forever 21, because of how memorable that year has been, and I can honestly say that it seems 2023 is at par with that year. Just as I had a great start to my twenties, I am ready to close this chapter and make this the best year yet, before I face my thirties.

This was how I spent my 29th October

Oct 12 - I met my Bumble* Friends big sister in person for the first time, ate Ma-an Noriega. We were supposed to watch films at the Spanish Film Festival but we ended up speaking for five hours. It was not enough, but she had to go home for work already. We will meet again this week to watch the Eras together : )

Oct 14-15 - To say this weekend was amazing is an understatement. Spent the night with Anthony Rosaldo United and Anthony himself for the 5th anniversary of the fans club.

Oct 17-present - I started training Jenina, JR, and Sophie and it’s always a fun session with them! Love how they learn fast, just like when Dom and Lor learned fast when Ate Marc and I trained them before.

Oct 20-21 - Advance birthday celebration with Dad at The Theatre at Solaire! It’s a dream come to watch Hamilton in the flesh! Can’t get over That Would Be Enough and Dear Theodosia. Then, spent the night with Karl and Dad at Solaire Casino (only bet 100, we were just there for the unlimited drinks hahaha)

Oct 22 - Happy birthday at work! So happy I spent the day with my AM family. I’m the only AM on Sundays but for today, Kryzl Mendez, Dominic Emanuel Apolona, Lorhenz Lacsa, and Adonijah Trixie Banico rendered RDOT to help with the billable hours, and I enjoyed my special day with them. Spent the day with my favorite teammates at my favorite fastfood, McDo <3 Isay gave me an Eras shirt, and Dominic gave me a powerbank plus letter because I asked for a letter haha.

Oct 23 - My closest friend Karl Jude Emmanuel Ocampo made me feel special in many ways! He took me to Wildflour, bought an entire cake that I can share with the team, and gave me gifts I never imagined I’d be receiving from a friend: a new cell phone, memory card, and the first laminated letter I received in my life. Thank you bb for spoiling me. What did I do to deserve you?

Oct 24 - Our very generous OM, Ronaldo Lacson, gave pizza for the team in celebration of my birthday, plus I got another cake, which I brought home to share with my Dad.

Oct 27 - Belated birthday celebration with Dad at Mama Lou’s - Endless Pasta! We had a collective total of 11 plates.

Oct 28 - Spent quality time with my siblings from Isentia, Angelique Daclan hosted a Halloween 2014 Tumblr theme party. This is my kind of party, intimate and only spent with five fellow introverts hahah, much better than parties with lots of people (although that can be fun, too, as long it’s rare). So happy I saw AJ, Morris Manalaysay, and Laborem Joey Bobiles again. Also met Eli and Ellie, AJ’s friends at her new work. Grateful I have this circle where I can join drinking sessions without the pressure to drink <3

Oct 29 - Went straight to work after the party, and Lorhenz surprised me by treating me at McDo as his birthday gift! After work, I volunteered to man the booth of Parish Renewal Experience at our church.

Today is October 31, and I’m just amazed at how remarkable this October has been. I’m also astonished at how my INFP-T social battery is being pushed to the limit, because I’m that person who needs a month up to a quarter of hibernation (my term for alone time) for every date and social gathering I have (ask my closest friends Karl and Gee Ann Barro – they know HAHA) But ever since I started working onsite again, I’ve been starting to become more flexible with my social life haha. Slowly, I increased my capacity to agree to invites, and initiate them, too, when I have the energy. I just need to maximize my alone time to recharge and be ready to make new memories again with the people I love.

Thank You, Lord, for being the writer of my life story. I surrender to You this new chapter. Thank you for the love you surround me with and the people you put in my life. I pray to give back that love to the world. May I be a better daughter, a better friend, a better colleague, a better person. May I be the person You want me to be. And someday, may I be the right person for the person I’ve been waiting for since 1994, wherever he is right now.

*I tried Bumble because my work friends have been encouraging me to start dating already, since I never tried at my age, but I was not ready yet so I invested time in Bumble BFF instead haha. But, just like I told my teammate AT, now that I’m 29, if ever someone will ask me out, then I’ll give the person a chance. Let’s see how this year will unfold haha!

PS. My mind’s my age, but my heart will always beat like I’m only 7, 15, and 21. As for my soul though, it’s around 150 to 200 years old already haha.

[lonespektr]

Day 25: A babysitter's guide to monster hunting

Adorable! Great concept. Self explanatory monster kidnaps kid, secret babysitter organization must retrieve child. Featuring math nerd black girl magic. Very cute. ⭐⭐⭐⭐

[party-gilmore]

Aaannnd with the influx of Twitter users also comes the beginning of Twitter bullshit.

Just got a suggested post in my dash of Obvious Plant Attempts To Garner Sympathy Via "Everyone Dogpiled On Me Because I Spoke Openly About Wishing I Hadnt Started HRT So Young, Here's Some Obvious TERF Dogwhstles About The Irreversible Effects Of HRT I Wish I'd Known And Why We Need To Advocate For Stricter Regulations On Allowing Youths Hormone Therapy."

NOW. Some people do genuinely detransition. Or retransition to something else. And they deserve our support no matter the reasons. It's all about Finding The Truest Them. So how do you recognize and the Obvious Plant while not accidentally turning your back on someone looking for real support? I'm not the best at explaining to others feel FREE to chime in here especially if you've more experience and/or eloquence please, but here are some things to help you weed out the garden:

ANY post with an end goal of "-NOT what i expected at all! And this is why we should have stronger restrictions on providing HRT/Surgical treatments." I GUARANTEE you, any person seeking gender affirming health care has been told REPEATEDLY what the possible side effects are. Over and over and over. It is HARD to get treatment. It's not some crazy hypothetical"they gave this to me so easily before i could make an informed choice and i regret it so much T.T" fentanyl in the Halloween candy kind of situation. On top of that, the MOST a minor is gonna get is puberty blockers. The post in question was a "21 yr old man on T for 5 years and now he looks like a 40 yr old dad 😥" Point me to a 16 yr old that got access to complete HRT and i will BEG you for their health care providers contact info i can't even get an appointment at PP to start TALKING about starting T at thirty.

ANY post who's main regret is "-and I'm ugly now." Re: the example above, the Plant Post was bemoaning their lack of youth and attractiveness and how their life was "ruined" now because of the "irreversible effects." 1) The effects of second puberty are about as irreversible and first puberty. Which is to say. The whole reason HRT works... is because... most of it *is* changeable. Your doctor will spell out which is which for you. The one this post was complaining about??? Balding. Male pattern balding. That's it. Beautifully clear skin, lovely face, but because of male pattern balding now their "ruined." They are actively playing on stereotypes of what is and isn't attractive to cishet women. That is terfy as fuck. No one actually detransitioning is doing it because they werent "as attractive as a _____ they thought they'd be." It's because something just intrinsically does not (or it did once but no longer) feel right in who they are. The idea anyone would go through that for something as shallow as being/not being "hot..." Wtf. 2) do you KNNNOOWWW??? how many of my 20's and early 30's transman friends and kinda me ??? Would KILLLLLLL TO LOOK LIKE A 40 YEAR OLD DAD????

ANY MENTION AT ALL OF "HOW TERRIBLE" IT IS THAT "QUEER SOCIETY" FORCING PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY KIDS, TO TRANSITION. NO ONE IS PUSHING TRANSITION ON KIDS. IT IS THE OPPOSITE PROBLEM. PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO STOP EVEN SOCIAL TRANSITION. PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO FORCE KIDS TO DE-TRANSITION. THIS IS YOUR BIGGEST CLUE.

Of course we want to support other queer folk who, for whatever reason in their gender gender journey, destransition. Even if it's the right decision, it's a hard one, and will always be a struggle. And they'll need support. (And they are still queer! They lived and explored as a gender other than the one assigned to them at birth! They have been both now! Welcome to Cis Plus! Cis With Benefits! Their Journeys In Gender will always be queer ones and no one can take that away from them!!!)

Unfortunately, this is going to CONSTANTLY be co-opted by TERFs and other trans exclusionists trying to twist it into some kind of GOTCHA! to further restrict access to gender affirming care. And you NEED to keep eyes open for it, particularly now during the Twitter exodus.

[mpanighetti]

Halloween Zero-to-Thirty Challenge Rating Challenge

October 20th Prompt: Expanse

Art by TigerLilyNoh!

Living Empty (Challenge 19)

Lore

Contrary to popular belief, "space" is a misnomer. The inky black expanse between worlds, their stars, and galaxies is not empty as we might perceive. Space itself is a presence, imparting as-yet-poorly-understood effects on visible bodies with its own influence. Traveling between the worlds carries countless risks to an interstellar voyager, but it might surprise some to learn that even this empty void could be a threat of grave concern.

Far away from the safe atmospheres of populated worlds, there lie strange "tunnels" bridging the planes, and when such connections are established with the Far Realm, sometimes space itself can be tainted by that corruptive psionic energy and be granted a perverse life and sentience. This emptiness enjoys perfect camouflage amongst an endless backdrop of starlight, blending with the blackness of normal space and allowing it free movement. Its primary compulsion is to snuff out all the light it sees, which draws it toward the brightest starlight. It then journies ceaselessly, methodically, unerringly toward those pinpricks of light, until it reaches them and draws out all the energy they emit until none remains.

The scholars residing on terrestrial bodies see this blinking-out of the oldest and strongest stars through their telescopes, and they emit a sigh of relief, for their world and their sun were both spared on that day. The void claimed another victim, and the people of this world can rest easier knowing that their days, while numbered, will continue for the time being.

Attributes

Gargantuan aberration, chaotic neutral

Armor Class: 19 (natural armor)

Hit Points: 348 (17d20 + 170)

Speed: 0 ft., fly 120 ft. (hover)

STR: 18 (+4)

DEX: 10 (+0)

CON: 30 (+10)

INT: 26 (+8)

WIS: 24 (+7)

CHA: 8 (-1)

Damage Resistances: cold

Damage Immunities: psychic; bludgeoning, piercing, and slashing from nonmagical attacks

Condition Immunities: charmed, frightened, petrified

Senses: darkvision 120 ft. (including magical darkness), passive Perception 23

Languages: telepathy 120 ft.

Challenge: 19 (22,000 XP)

Proficiency Bonus: +6

Special Traits

Innate Spellcasting (Psionics). The living empty's innate spellcasting ability is Intelligence (spell save DC 22). It can innately cast the following spells, requiring no components:

At will: dissonant whispers, magnify gravity, mind sliver, shatter, suggestion

3/day each: blight, circle of death, counterspell, disintegrate, dominate monster, gravity fissure, gravity sinkhole, ravenous void, reverse gravity, sickening radiance

1/day each: dark star, feeblemind, power word stun, psychic scream, synaptic static

All spells cast by the living empty that have an area of effect can instead affect all spaces within the living empty. When it casts spells in this manner, the living empty is not considered to be in the area of effect for the purpose of needing to make saving throws or otherwise being affected by its own spells.

Magic Resistance. The living empty has advantage on saving throws against spells and other magical effects.

Void Nature. The living empty doesn't require air, can fly freely in a vacuum, and can move through other creatures and objects as if they were difficult terrain. Each creature it moves through takes 6 (1d12) psychic damage; no creature can take this damage more than once per turn. The space inside a living empty is filled with magical darkness.

Actions

Multiattack. The living empty makes three attacks with its tentacles.

Tentacle. Melee Weapon Attack: +10 to hit, reach 20 ft., one target. Hit: 14 (3d6 + 4) bludgeoning damage plus 4 (1d8) force damage, and the target is pulled up to 20 feet toward the living empty, potentially being pulled inside of the empty's space.

Psychic Barrage (Recharge 5-6). The living empty barrages the minds of all creatures inside of it. Each creature makes a DC 19 Wisdom saving throw. On a failed save, a creature takes 14 (4d6) psychic damage and is frightened until the end of its next turn.

[id: lore and stat block for living empty, depicting the blackness of space in the shape of a toothed monster, reaching toward a rocketship]

[Original prompt]

[notdonesimpin]

It Takes Time ~k.b.~

koutarou bokuto x reader

warnings: angst (but not with bo), fluff (with bo)

synopsis: After breaking up with your boyfriend of three years, you find yourself falling for Bokuto’s antics to cheer you up.

a/n: okay so this started as purely self indulgent and i just typed whatever felt right lol so it’s kinda long. hope you enjoy :)

“We’ve been at this for ten minutes, why hasn’t he cheered up?” Sarukui huffs. 

Akaashi sighs, watching the first years fail to lift his spirits. He’s pretty sure they have tried everything that usually works, but none of it had any affect on him. 

“We’ve got about ten minutes to turn his mood around or we might be doomed. We need him at his best performance when playing Nekoma,” Komi reminds. 

Nekoma… Y/L/N could fix this, Akaashi thought.

“I’ve got it!” Akaashi exclaims, “I’ll be back as quickly as possible!”

He rushes off to find you, leaving all of them in confusion as to what he’s talking about. 

“Y/L/N!” Akaashi yells, running towards you as you fill up the water bottles with the other Nekoma manager.

“What’s up? Aren’t you supposed to be warming up right now?” You ask and look up at him as you tighten the lids on all of the bottles.

“Are you swapping out this game? Are you supposed to help the other managers with something?”

“I am swapping out, but the other managers don’t have anything planned. We just kind of chat.”

“Good.” He grabs your arm and drags you in the direction of the gym. 

“Akaashi! Why are you dragging me?” You try to keep up so he at least wouldn’t drag you.

As soon as you get in the gym, he rushes you over to his team and pushes you in the direction of Bokuto. 

“Fix him,” he requests.

You look at him in confusion. “I don’t know how to do that!”

“Just do what you normally do! You don’t have to do anything special.”

You huff and walk over to Bokuto.

The team looks at Akashi in confusion as Komi speaks up. “You got Y/L/N?”

“Just watch.”

“Bokuto?” you walk up to him, “Are you okay?”

As soon as he hears your voice, he perks up and looks at you with a wide smile. “Y/N! You’re here to watch me play!”

“Do you want me to watch?”

“Yes! I want you to see how awesome I am! I worked on a crazy good line shot that’ll blow your mind!” He overemphasizes with his body, making you laugh a bit.

“You showed it to me last night during free practice, Bo.”

“Oh yeah…” he pouts for a quick second but then recovers, “But it looks so much better in a game!”

“I guess I can stay and watch. Don’t go too easy on us, okay?” you tease, walking over to Nekoma’s side of the court.

The entire team was in shock by how your presence alone was able to change Bokuto’s entire mood.

“Bokuto has a crush on her,” Akaashi briefly explains, “but she has a boyfriend.”

“Shouldn’t that make him even more sad?”

Akaashi shakes his head, “They are on thin ice right now, so he’s trying even harder.”

“Guys! What are you doing standing around? We have to warm up!” Bokuto yells, gaining the entire team’s attention.

Later that night, you were hanging around Kuroo at his free practice with Bokuto, Akaashi, Tsukishima, Hinata, and a deceased Lev. 

“Y/N?” you heard the voice of your boyfriend at the door.

Everyone paused with wide eyes and looked between you two.

You sat the water bottle for Lev down beside him as you asked, “What are you doing here, Seijuro?”

“We shouldn’t be having this conversation over text. Can you please come with me?” he requested. You nodded and walked over to him, giving Kuroo a look as you passed.

As soon as you were out of sight, Bokuto started to make his way after you, but Kuroo grabbed his arm. “Bokuto, not this time.”

“What if he hurts her? What if she’s crying?” Bokuto says. They could hear the sadness and desperation in his voice to make sure you were okay.

“She’ll let us know when she feels like it. Let’s practice some more. I promise if she isn’t back in fifteen minutes, we’ll look for her,” Akaashi adds in, managing to focus Bokuto’s attention elsewhere for the time being.

Meanwhile, you were sitting on the hill with Seijuro beside you.

“So you did cheat on me,” you started.

“Y/N, really?” Seijuro looks at you with disbelief.

“I asked you two days ago if what Kuroo told me was true. Two days, Seijuro. Instead of just telling me no, you ghosted me and then showed up here. You wouldn’t do all of that if it wasn’t true. I don’t want to believe you did it, and I’ve never thought you would. I’ll ask you again. Did you cheat on me?”

After a few seconds of silence Seijuro confesses, “Yes, I did.”

You could feel your heart ache and your throat close up as the tears began to well in your eyes. You got up with fists clenched, trying to keep your composure.

“I’m done, Seijuro. We’re done.”

You walk away as Seijuro follows behind you with pleas for you to just let him explain. “She didn’t mean anything! It was a mistake.”

“It was a mistake?” You pause and turn to look at him as you spat, “How long did you see her behind my back?”

He became quiet again, but this time it only made you angrier. You shook your head, taking off the necklace he gave you and tossing it on the ground in front of him.

“Three years. We were together for three years, Seijuro. Does that not mean anything to you?” Your voice began to raise with every question you asked, “Was I just an easy lay? Did you ever even care about me? Was I not pretty enough? Not good enough? Was everything you ever promised to me a lie?”

“Six months!” Seijuro cut you off, “And, no. You mean so much to me. I just got caught up because you were focusing so much on the volleyball team, and I missed you. I was selfish and stupid, and I should have talked to you about it instead of cheating.”

You shook your head in disbelief, “You played me like a fool for six months. Would you have even stopped if Kuroo didn’t catch you. Would we even be having this conversation right now?”

“No, I would have figured that what you didn’t know couldn’t hurt you.”

Your lips were tightly pressed together as you took in this information. “Thank you for being honest. Also, thank you for showing me how much of a joke I am. I hope you treat her better than this.”

“Y/N-Fuck! Listen to me.” Seijuro grabbed onto your wrist, squeezing tight enough for you to feel pain.

“Let go!” you wince and try to pull your arm back. 

As you stepped back, you ran into someone’s chest, looking up to see Kuroo staring Seijuro down. “Do we have a problem here?” Kuroo seethes.

The air was thick as Kuroo stared Seijuro down.

“We’re just talking, Kuroo-kun,” Seijuro grip slightly tightens as he tries to pull you closer.

“Then why does she look terrified right now? Also, I believe she told you to let go.” 

Kuroo’s eyes narrow as a dare for Seijuro to try anything again. Seijuro hesitated, contemplating on if he wanted to make this harder than it had to be. 

“Look at you being her protector. Where’s the other guy? The knight and shining armor?” Seijuro drops your wrist as he steps forward to get in Kuroo’s face.

“Seijuro, please leave. I’ve heard everything I needed to. It’s over between us. It was over as soon as you cheated the first time.”

Seijuro became quiet, backing away from the both of you as he clenched his jaw. You and Kuroo stood there in silence and watched as he walked away.

“Are you okay?” 

You nodded as you looked down and rubbed your wrist.

You walk back to the gym with Kuroo close behind you, putting on an emotionless face as you come through the door. 

Bokuto immediately noticed you and spoke up, “Y/N? Are you okay?”

You plaster a quick smile and give a small wave as you help Lev up. “Don’t worry about me! I’m just going to get Lev in bed and probably turn in myself. I’ll see you guys tomorrow!”

“Okay…” Bokuto says, holding back everything he wanted to ask you.

He figured it didn’t go well since you looked like you were about to cry. Plus, he noticed that you didn’t have the necklace Seijuro gave you on anymore either.

After getting Lev back, you went to the bath since no one was in there and let out silent sobs as you sat in the water. 

You’d never felt so used and useless in your life. Maybe it was karma getting back at you for all the things you did when you were younger.

Maybe you just weren’t meant to find love. You were stupid enough to give everything to the first guy that ever showed interest in you. You’re a fucking joke. You always have been. 

What made you think that being with Seijuro would make it any different? 

You hadn’t realized that you’d been in there for almost thirty minutes until your phone went off from a text.

Bo: *sent a photo* Thinking of doing this next halloween. Opinions?

You giggled to yourself, looking at the photo of a Sailor Moon outfit and imagining Bokuto in it.

Y/N: you definitely have the legs for it lol

Bo: I KNOW RIGHT ;) 

You laughed a little more, wiping some of the tears from your eyes as you waited for his next message.

Bo: did that make you smile? I figured you probably left early so you wouldn’t make us worry. 

You furrowed your eyebrows, finding yourself shocked by his text. 

Y/N: yeah, it did :) plus, you guys don’t need to worry about me. I’m a big girl.

Bo: I know I don’t NEED to, but I do. 

Bo: want to join me to get popsicles?

Y/N: can you wait 20 min?

Bo: OF COURSE! Meet you outside of your building!

You rushed out of the bath to put on some clothes and meet him outside. 

As soon as you walked outside, he stood up and softly smiled at you. “You ready?”

You nod, watching him jump for joy as he walked beside you. “There’s a store about five minutes away. I hope that’s okay.”

You lightly laugh, “It’s fine, Bo. I needed a post break up snack.”

His eyes widened, “Oh, I’m sorry about that.”

“You don’t need to apologize. It wasn’t your fault.”

He shoves his hands in his pockets, kicking a few rocks on the path. “I know,” he mutters, “I can’t imagine how bad you feel, though.”

You shrug, “I don’t even know how bad I feel. I know that I’m upset about why it happened, and I know that I’m the one that broke up with him. I guess it just feels like a fever dream.”

Bokuto nodded, letting the two of you fall into silence for the rest of the way there. He didn’t want to seem like he was pushing you for answers that you weren’t ready to give and you appreciated it.

As soon as you got in the store, Bokuto grabbed a small basket and handed it to you. “Go get your feel better snacks. I’ll get the popsicles and some ice cream.”

“Bo-”

He cut you off before you could respond. “I’m covering it, so don't worry about it. I know you like to eat your feelings when you’re sad. Even though you think you put on a good mask, I can always tell when you’re sad, so please get your comfort food. However much of it you need.”

He walked off towards the freezer section before you even had the chance to respond.

~

The next morning, Kuroo was carrying you on his back to the gym since you refused to get up. 

“Does this count as kidnapping?” you question.

He rolls his eyes, “No, but it will count as a murder if you don’t stop sulking and doubting your worth. He was the one in the wrong, and he is the idiot. Not you. So, I’m not going to let you wallow in self pity. You’re gonna stay busy.”

You mumble out a few curses, “You could have at least let me put on a fucking hoodie before dragging me out here.”

“I will drop you and feel no mercy.”

You pout, “I need a new best friend.”

“Well, good luck finding one.”

You hear Bokuto chant and look his way to see him giving Akaashi a high five.

“Kuroo, why is Bokuto so nice to me?” you question, “I don’t think I’ve done anything to deserve it.”

“Being nice isn’t something people have to earn. Do people need reasons to be nice? That’s just the kind of person he is.”

“I know… I just figured- nevermind.”

Kuroo stops and you jump off of his back, immediately going in his bag to steal his jacket. 

“Nope, now you have to tell me,” he snatches his jacket from you.

You let out a huff, “Last night, he took me out for popsicles and bought my snacks because he knew I needed it. Plus, he told me that he always notices whenever I’m upset and hiding it.”

Kuroo laughs as he hands you the jacket. “You are so oblivious.”

He grabs his bag and walks off as some of the other managers call you over before you could ask him what he meant. 

~

A few months later, you were at nationals with Nekoma. 

As soon as you walked in, you heard your name get called.

“Y/N! I’ve missed you! Are you going to watch me play today?” Bokuto questions, practically jumping up and down.

You softly laugh, “Yeah, I think I can be there for the first match before they have to get warmed up.”

His eyes brightened, “Really?”

“I wouldn’t want to miss my favorite Ace playing,” you grin.

“Hey!” Yamamoto exclaims, but you dismiss him.

“I have to help them register, but I’ll see you later, yeah?”

Bokuto nods as you walk off with a wave.

“Kuroo,” you start, “At the training camp… you said that I was oblivious to why Bokuto paid so much attention to me.  I think I get it now.”

Kuroo raises an eyebrow, “You do?”

You nod, “Yeah because I could tell how sad he was that I couldn’t watch his entire game and how disappointed he was that we couldn’t talk any longer. I guess I never really noticed that I’d begun to like him until we were face to face again and not talking over the phone. Does that mean Bokuto likes me, too?”

“Ask Akaashi to steal his other jersey for you to wear and see what happens when you walk in before the game starts. You’ll get your answer.”

A few hours later, you tossed on Bokuto’s jersey over your long sleeve shirt and walked into the small gymnasium to see him.

There weren’t many people in there yet since it was the first game of the day and it hadn’t even started yet.

You leaned against the railing and yelled, “Bokuto! Akaashi!”

Akaashi gave you a small wave and thumbs up as Bokuto ran over to you excitedly. “You made it!” He glances down at your shirt with wide eyes and points.

You feel your cheeks heat up and stammer, “Oh! Akaashi gave it to me! I wanted to support you as much as possible, but I can take it off if you want me to!”

You fumble with the hem as Bokuto places his hand over yours. You look up to see a soft smile on his face as he shakes his head and his cheeks redden.

“Keep it on. You look really cute,” he confesses.

“O-Oh… thank you. I’ll give it to your manager before I leave.”

“No!” he exclaims, clearing his throat out, “I don’t need it today, so if you could keep it on… I don’t want any guys trying to hit on you or anything.”

“Bokuto-san!” Akaashi yells, motioning him back over.

“Okay!” Bokuto looks back at you and taps his cheek, “Good luck kiss?”

You laugh but comply, earning a cheer from him as he rushes off. 

You watched as much as you could of his game, cheering him on every time that he made a great play and cheering him up whenever he seemed to get down on himself.

Bokuto noticed when you left, feeling upset that you couldn’t watch the rest of his game; however, he saw your disappointed face as well and decided that he’d keep playing his best game so he could tell you all about it.

At the end of the day, you were laying down on one of the practice gym floors as you waited for the rest of the team to show up when you felt someone poking your cheek. You scrunched up your nose, refusing to open your eyes as you say, “Let me rest in peace.”

“I would, but I kind of need my jersey tomorrow. How about we trade?” Bokuto says with a wide grin as you open your eyes.

You notice one of his old team hoodies in his hand that he never let anyone touch because he didn’t want it to lose it’s luck.

You shrugged off his jersey as you say, “I thought this was your favorite.”

“It is, so take good care of it, okay?” he grins, “Plus, you need something that’s actually warm when we head out.”

You tilt your head in confusion. “Head out?”

“The next few days are going to be hectic for all of us, so I figured we should have a little bit of fun while things are still decently calm,” he shrugged, “I already told Kuroo, so just meet me at the by the side gym after your team meeting, okay?”

“Okay…”

He grins and ruffles your hair before rushing off to find Akaashi.

~

Thirty minutes later, you were met with Bokuto’s beaming face. “You ready?” he softly asked, walking up to you.

“Lead the way!”

You found yourselves in a park and sat on the ground to chat about random nonsense.

“Y/N, look at me,” Bokuto requested. You complied, watching him tuck a flower behind your ear with a grin.

“How do I look?”

“Perfect,” Bokuto muttered as his eyes glanced down at your lips and his hand caressed your cheek as he leaned towards you.

As soon as you felt his lips ghost over yours, you pulled back and placed a hand on his chest. Bokuto opens his eyes, failing at hiding his disappointment at your action.

“It’s too soon, isn’t it?” he softly asked.

“Wait, I-” you look down embarrassed, “I’m sorry.” Your hand drops from his chest and onto your lap.

He gives you a reassuring smile, “Don’t be. I should have let you make the first move when you were ready. I just got excited since I’ve never been able to act on my feelings for you.”

“Bokuto, I like you. I really do, but I don’t know if I’m good enough. I wasn’t good enough for Seijuro, so there’s no way I can even be a fourth of what you need. I gave so much of myself to him just to make him happy and it still wasn’t enough to keep him from finding someone better.-”

“I’m not him,” Bokuto cuts you off, visibly becoming upset that you think so lowly of yourself. “You can’t judge what I need based on him, either. Y/N, you are a lot more special than you give yourself credit for.”

“I’m really not…” you mutter, looking away from him.

“I’ve liked you for over a year now, Y/N. If you weren’t special to me, I wouldn’t still want to be the one holding your hand down the street or even coming to a park late at night just to talk because I love hearing your voice.”

You both fell in silence as he laid down to look at the stars. Without thinking, you laid beside him and admired the sight of the night sky.

“You remind me of a star. Without you, my life would be pretty dull,” he looks over at you with a silly grin on his face. 

“Was that supposed to be some corny pickup line?” you giggle.

“Yes, but I meant it. Without realizing it, I began to try to always play my best to make sure I had a good story to tell you. Even just thinking about you during a match would get me really hyped up and I’d play better. I would do anything to never see that pretty smile leave your face.”

“Now you’re just trying to make me feel better.”

“Y/N, I’m serious.” He turns to face you, “You are everything I need and more. You don’t have to pretend to be anything you aren’t with me because I like you the same when you’re bumming it out at Kuroo’s or Kenma’s house and when you’re glammed up for a girl’s night out.”

“When did you realize how you felt about me?”

As if Kuroo knew where the conversation was headed, you both got a text from him in your group chat.

Ku: Alright, love birds. Y/N’s curfew is approaching. I expect her back in 15 minutes on the dot. We ALL have an early morning.

You roll your eyes as you send back a quick text while Bokuto laughs and gets up.

Y/N: Get a life, Kuroo…

Bokuto extends his hand out to you with a cheeky grin. “May I have the honor of walking your highness back to her temporary castle?”

You grab his hand, letting him pull you up with a laugh. “Only if you promise we can stop for hot chocolate.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” he hums and laces his fingers with yours as you begin to walk in the direction of your hotel, continuing the conversation, “I think I’ve always liked you at least a little bit. I mean, it was hard not to like you when I finally met you since you were really sweet. So, when I heard you had a boyfriend, I just kind of brushed off those feelings like ‘as long as she’s happy, I’m happy.’ Then, when you introduced me to him at that practice match during our second year, I just felt that he wasn’t good enough for you. I knew you could do better, and I could be better for you than that pretentious asshat. I guess what really made me realize that I liked you was actually seeing you with him. I was disgusted that he got to touch you and hold you in ways that I never could. I felt like he’d built this wall between our friendship, and I hated him for it.”

“How come you never told me you felt that way about him?” you question.

“How was I supposed to? Was I supposed to tell you that your boyfriend was a piece of shit so come date me?”

“Maybe not in that exact way, but yeah. You’re usually pretty honest, and I trust your judgement most of the time.”

Bokuto dramatically places his hand on his chest with a drastic sigh, “Most of the time? You wound me.”

The entire walk consisted of cheerful banter and jokes, making fun of each other. 

As soon as you were in front of the hotel, Bokuto’s shoulders slumped. “I wish we could hang out a little longer.”

“Well, I wouldn’t be opposed to hanging out again after nationals are over,” you hum, turning to face him.

“Really?!” 

You nodded and his eyes lit up. You could tell that he already had a million different things to do running through his head.

“I can’t wait! We’re going to have so much fun!”

Another text from Kuroo came through: Can you guys kiss already and go your separate ways?

“I guess I should go before Kuroo actually storms over here,” you huff and continue, “I just wanted to say thank you for not getting mad at me earlier…”

He tilted his head with a wide grin, “I could never be mad at you! I understand that getting over an ex takes time, so we can go as slow as you’d like. I want you to be comfortable with me.”

You feel a weight lift off of your shoulders as he pulls you in for a hug. You both pull back and you give him a quick kiss on the cheek before heading inside.

“I’ll see you tomorrow!” you grin, opening the door to walk inside.

Bokuto smirks, “You act like you aren’t going to call me in an hour.”

You flick him off, earning a laugh from him as he waves you off and walks away.

“Do you get it now?” Kuroo raised an eyebrow as you walked over to him and sat down on the couch.

“Can you not pry into my love life?” you huff.

“Love life? I was just talking about his crush on you! Are you guys together now?”

Your phone buzzes with a text from Bokuto: the next time we go out, i’m taking you on a date! 

Kuroo peeked over into your phone as you typed a quick reply back: looking forward to it :)

“Finally!” Kuroo chered, “You’re acting on your feelings, and it’s not a shitty guy!”

You rolled your eyes, unable to come up with a witty response since you knew he was right. 

Maybe healing wouldn’t take much longer with Bokuto by your side.

[blushing-starker]

Another holiday one: Peter and Pepper going caroling together and they visit Tony in the workshop. The bots are wearing Santa hats

"Peter, darling, you know you can get him anything and he'll be over the moon, right? He loves you and it'd kill Tony to know this is causing you so much stress. We could always do a joint gift if that helps? After caroling, the night is ours and so is the mall."

God, what did he do to deserve Miss Potts? She has a solution for all the problems in the world, never hesitates to take what she wants and could probably kick his ass twenty different ways without breaking a sweat. Just last night, she'd cocked her head, put on a disappointed face and Peter was done, defeated, tore himself away from Tony's side at the lab to devour some freshly baked pie Rhodey had dropped by. They'd been working for hours, basically a hair's breadth away from a breakthrough, but Miss Potts didn't like her boys tinkering too long without eating.

Now she's holding his hand like it isn't serious, like it doesn't set Peter's heart aflame because this is Pepper Potts, kind and strong and witty and amazing, showing affection in a public place without shame or fear. And yeah, Tony would never be cold to him outside, but the man's a koala when you earn his trust. Peter has to practically pry the billionaire off from Pepper when the CEO has a meeting to conquer (he's dating a CEO, he's dating a billionaire, he's dating a CEO, he's dating a-

"Sweetheart, I see the gears turning in that head of yours, same as Tony. What is it, Peter?" The snow starts to fall a bit harder and they quicken their pace, catch up with Nat, Bucky and Bruce as they line themselves up before the next porch, ready to start caroling their hearts out. Who'd have thought they enjoyed the season this much?

The others didn't come because decorating the tower and baking dessert for 20 plus people took a team effort. Peter had wrapped an arm around Miss Potts' waist and swung them to the car before they were snatched up by Steve to help in the kitchen. They'd been pressed pretty close, Peter not wanting to risk hurting his, what, lover? Girlfriend? His lover's wife? Either way, he had curled around the tall woman, tried to not jostle her too much in case she got sick. It had been nice. Very nice, really.

The whole thing had lasted maybe thirty seconds so yeah. Technically, this is the first time they've had physical contact for a relatively long period of time. He's eighteen now, not supposed to be getting so hyped and nervous over something as simple as holding hands and going caroling along a snow covered neighborhood adorned with a thousand Christmas lights. But, but he's always been a romantic at heart and the neon glow is reflected off of shiny snowflakes that taste like something pure and special, his teammates are joyous, look decades younger, Bucky's cat Alpine has stubbornly decided to crisscross his ankles and Miss Potts ' is just really fucking pretty, ok?

"Peter?" He gets why Tony can submit so easily to the force of nature that is Pepper Potts ; is rather sure it has something to do with honest eyes and a gentle way of loving broken men.

"Um, you're very pretty, Miss Potts," way to go, Peter. It's a wonder he and Tony even got together when they share one brain cell and it's mainly dedicated to superhero work. Or to Miss Potts.

She softens, tugs at him until they wrap around each other and then kisses him. Light, barely there kisses on pale cheeks, his eyelids, the curve of a red nose, under an unhinged jaw. Nat shoves the team forward, says the next house will probably give them candy while winking at Peter, grins when he turns scarlet. Bucky grumbles, "it's not exactly Halloween," but she yanks the supersoldier away from them so there's some semblance of privacy present.

Miss Potts sighs, sets her chin on his head and Peter short circuits right there, is delighted by the fact that she's taller than him, vows to buy her as many heels and high boots as possible because this is extremely nice and being tucked under her is a dream come true.

"You're so nice, Pete. I don't think Tony's gonna last a month before he says he loves you, not with someone so considerate and amazing. Nat bet it'd take me three months, but right now? Tony would take one look at me and say three weeks. We've been outside for a while, how about we head back home? See if our ridiculous baby got away with sneaking to the lab?"

Oh. Oh, is he supposed to speak after that? Function when she just sent his world tumbling down in a second or two? He inhales slowly, presses his frost bitten lips to a long neck and shivers when Miss Potts laughs, sound as pure and lovely as the freshly fallen snow around them.

---:---------:----------:---------:-----------:---------:--------:---------:---

On the way back home (HomeHomeHomeHomeHomeHome), he catches sight of a pretzel stand and nearly slams them into the side of a building. Miss Potts does that thing where she chuckles almost silently and maybe it'll take her three weeks but Peter's ready to declare his love for her right then, absolutely smitten and aware of it. He wonders if this is what Tony felt when he fell for Miss Potts. Wonders if his boyfriend would tell him all about it soon enough.

Miss Potts strokes his cheek, smile this side of sharp and mischievous. "Does my boy want something?" It's a soft question with a soft touch with a not so soft look in eyes that could tear him apart any day of the week. His web snaps and they tumble down to the street, are saved by the fact there's three feet of snow by the building's back entrance and they weren't that high up.

Peter gets a pretzel from Miss Potts.

------:--------:--------:--------:--------:--------:--------:--------:-------:-

Their lover (loverloverloverlover) is, in fact, hiding in the lab. There's a neon glow here, too, wrapped around Tony as he reassembles holograms, sketches new designs for the spider suit, revises old architecture plans with the gaze of a hawk.

"Anthony Potts, you put down that hologram right now! You were supposed to help out and decorate; not adjust Peter's suit. Again." Tony jolts back, clicks his fingers and everything disappears from the lab table as if Jarvis had never brought several of the genius' secret files to life. He looks like a little kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar and Peter isn't gonna let him forget this for as long as they live.

There's plenty of space on the table now so he settles there, swings his legs up and down, grins up at a fidgeting Tony. "Anthony Potts is new." A cookie tray is tucked away behind a pile of papers and it's too tempting not to snack on one even if he just inhaled a pretzel.

"I can call you Peter Potts, too, you know. Don't tease him, I know you would've been here helping Tony out if we hadn't gone caroling."

It's Tony's turn to grin and Peter's turn to flush now. Two more cookies are snatched, shoved into his face. "I kind of like that. The Potts thing. It's nice."

Miss Potts crosses over to them, wraps a finger around the one curl he can never tame and pulls on it until he's leaning on her palm with the sudden urge to never leave the lab. "I'm glad you like it, Peter. Anthony here has to go clean the dining table, but we can cuddle on the couch to warm up before seeing what's already cooked. How's that sound?"

"It sounds like your husband is being punished for upgrading your boyfriend's suit and making sure he doesn't die fighting some weird alien dog." Tony huffs, steals Dum-E's Santa hat with a pout before dragging himself up the stairs to the kitchen. "I'm saving everyone's lives, but no. I gotta see Steve butcher a Christmas tradition."

"There's nothing wrong with how Steve cooks the meal."

"Tell that to my grandmother and nanny. Even Jarvis could cook better and he doesn't have any hands." Said A. I hums in a suspiciously noncommittal way as his creator starts yelling about blood being spilled if a single stain is found in his prized kitchen.

The bots all seem to sigh in relief, roll over to bump Peter's knee or shoulder as affectionately as Alpine. He patiently fixes their elf ears and hats, rubs a few bells clean from grease and motor oil because Tony probably hadn't noticed and wouldn't notice until they accidentally stained something. Don't ask him or Miss Potts how, but Tony's children could ruin a fifty thousand dollar couch with purple paint without there necessarily being a can of paint around the lab.

Miss Potts' plan of cuddling on the couch is derailed when they hear screeching and curses pertaining to five different languages coming from above. She sighs, takes Peter's hand and he already knows she'll come up with a solution. She always did.

(Maybe it was time to explain he'd already found their gifts, twin silver rings with all their initials engraved hidden in his coat pocket.)

(And then Tony starts shouting something in Italian, Steve might be reverting to an Irish accent, Alpine hops on the dining table to pounce on the chicken, Miss Potts has to yank her husband away from the oven, Bucky's hair nearly catches on fire and yeah, he'll just show them on New Year's.)

[dd20century]

The Diva of Design: Elsa Peretti

“Elsa brought out all these things—the bone bracelet I remember best. Everything was so sensual, so sexy. I just loved it. It was different from anything I’d ever seen, and I’d seen a lot.” – Liza Minelli

On March 18, 2021, the design world lost an artist who was as elegant and unique as her iconic jewelry designs, when Elsa Peretti “died at her home in Sant Martí Vell, Spain…. For 50 years, her designs inspired countless women and left an indelible mark on the jewelry world”(1). She made her mark in the 1970s as many young women were rejecting traditional homemaker roles and striving for successful careers of their own instead. Elsa Peretti designs resonated with this generation of women, spurning the fussy ornamentation of their mothers’ generation, but still yearning for beauty and elegant sophistication.

Elsa Peretti at work in New York City, 1970. Photo credit: PL Gould/Images Press/Getty Images Image source.

Peretti’s Early Days 

Elsa Peretti was born on May 1, 1940 in Florence, Italy to a wealthy family. Her father “Ferdinando Peretti founded Anonima Petroli Italiana (API), a large Italian oil company”(2). Young Elsa received education in Rome and Switzerland. When she was twenty-one, the strong-willed Elsa broke with her family and “as a result, she was cut off from any financial support”(3). To make her own way, she worked first as a French teacher and later as a skiing instructor in the Swiss Alps. She returned to Rome to study interior design, and eventually worked for architect Dado Torrigiani (2).

Peretti Becomes a Successful Model

In the 1960s, Elsa Peretti was drawn to the intellectual life in Barcelona and began her modeling career there. In 1968 she went to New York City on the advice of her modelling agency (3); however, she arrived in the city “with a black eye from her [former] boyfriend who opposed of the move”(1). In New York she met designer Halston “whom she met while he was still a milliner at Bergdorf Goodman”(2) and became one of the regular group of models who he favored (3). The pair would become close friends and sometimes collaborators. Their relationship has been dramatized in the recent Netflix mini-series, “Halston.”

Peretti Finds Lasting Success as a Jewelry Designer

The following year, Peretti began designing jewelry, “She created pieces for herself at first, then expanded to” friends and fashion designers she had met through her work. Her first design was a “inspired by a small bud vase found in a flea market”(2). She began designing jewelry for Halston in 1971,(2) then her work really got noticed. That same year her work appeared in Vogue Magazine, and Ms. Peretti received “the 1971 Coty Award for jewelry design. In 1972, the New York City Department store Bloomingdales “opened a dedicated Peretti boutique”(1). During this time, Peretti and Halston “were the center of a fun, clubby clique that included [designer Giorgio] Sant´Angelo, the illustrator Joe Eula, Victor Hugo (Halston’s boyfriend), designer Stephen Burrows and Andy Warhol”(3).

Elsa Peretti, Bud Vase Pendants (1969). Photographer unknown, Image source.

1974 was a milestone year in Elsa Peretti’s career. “Halston introduced her to Walter Hoving, the then CEO of Tiffany”(3). Hoving hired Ms. Peretti to design jewelry in sterling silver – “the first time Tiffany had sold jewelry in that material in 25 years”(4). Ms. Peretti’s designs were organic, sensual, and embodied a sense of fun that appealed to younger women. Since the silver designs were more affordable, “in a break from tradition, women were shopping for themselves rather than being gifted jewelry by men” (5). “But, the affordable prices never detracted from their beauty or desirability”(1).

Elsa Peretti, Bone Cuff in 18K Gold (1975). Photo credit: Tiffany & Co. Image source.

Elsa Peretti’s Iconic Work 

One of Elsa Peretti’s most famous designs is the Bone Cuff, which many have compared to the cuffs worn by the comic book female superhero Wonder Woman (1). Like the Bone Cuff much of Peretti’s “minimalist, biomorphic designs were inspired by simple, natural things” 1: The Bean Pendant, The Scorpion Necklace, Open Heart, High Tide, Starfish and Snake among others. For Tiffany & Co., Ms. Peretti also designed dinnerware, pens, key rings, and ashtrays (4,6). The Thumbprint dishes and bowls make up her most successful dinnerware collection (6).

Elsa Peretti, Thumbprint Bowl in Sterling Silver (1985). Photo credit: Tiffany & Co. Image source.

In 1977 Ms. Peretti’s distinctive designs garnered her the cover of Newsweek magazine. By the end of the 1970s Ms. Peretti was Tiffany’s star designer, and “designed over thirty collections for” (6) the company. Today “Peretti’s products account for roughly 10% of Tiffany’s sales. So important is her work to Tiffany’s bottom line that they paid her 47 million plus royalties to renew her contract in 2012 for the next 20 years” (3).

Elsa Peretti’s Life in the Fast Lane 

Elsa Peretti’s “personal life always grabbed attention” (4). Although never married, Ms. Peretti was in a serious relationship with photographer Hemut Newton during the 1970s. One of Newton’s most famous images is that of Ms. Peretti posing on a Manhattan apartment terrace wearing a version of a Playboy Bunny costume (2). Of course, “The costume was her idea,”(1) for a Halloween party (2).

During the late 1970s, along with designer pal Halston, Peretti was a frequent patron of Studio 54, “the storied Manhattan disco that attracted celebrities like Andy Warhol, Bianca Jagger, [and] Cher”(4). Ms. Peretti’s exploits at the club were legendary, one night after a misunderstanding with Studio 54 co-owner Steve Rubell, Peretti smashed a bottle of vodka on the floor (4).

Elsa Peretti, Snake Necklace in 18K gold (1985). Photo credit: Freeman’s Image source.

Falling Out with Designer Halston

Peretti’s alcohol and drug use, particularly cocaine, increased as the 1970s wore on, however, her partying never affected her professional work (4). To complicate matters, the more success Peretti gained, the more her strained relationship with Halston became. “Things came to a head during a… dinner at Halston’s townhouse. The night ended with Peretti throwing her sable coat from Halston into the fire”(3). Soon after this episode Peretti left New York to live and work in her adopted home of Sant Martí Vell in Catalonia, Spain (3).

Elsa Peretti’s Philathropic Work 

In 1977 Elsa Perretti founded the Nando Peretti Foundation, “with the inheritance from her father, with whom she reconciled just months before his death” (4). The foundation funds projects that support the environment, social inclusion, social welfare, human rights and the rule of law, education, scientific research, and arts and cultural history (7). The organization “was renamed the Nando and Elsa Peretti Foundation” in 2015 (2).

Elsa Peretti, Bud Vase (year unknown). Photo credit: Tiffany & Co. Image source.

Elsa Peretti’s Lasting Legacy 

Over the years celebrities Liza Minelli, Sophia Loren, Diana Ross, Sarah Jessica Parker, and tennis champion Maria Sharapova have worn jewelry designed by Elsa Peretti (4). “Ms. Peretti’s designs are in several permanent collections, including those of the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York, the British Museum in London, and the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston” (4).

During her career Ms. Peretti was awarded the President’s Fellow Award by Rhode Island School of Design in 1981 and 1996 Designer of the Year by the Council of Fashion Designers of American Accessories. Honors awarded to the designer include the 2013 National Prize of Culture by the Catalan Government, the order of Merit of the Italian Republic, and the Order of Malta (1).

In 1990 an exhibition of Elsa Peretti’s work was held at the Fashion Institute of Technology. In 2001 the same institution awarded the designer an honorary Doctor of Fine Arts degree (6), and Tiffany & Co. established the “Peretti Professorship in Jewelry Design at the Fashion Institute of Technology, the first endowed professorship in the history of FIT”(6).

Although many of Elsa Peretti’s designs were produced over 50 years ago, they still “maintain their style and beauty”(6) and are remain popular with women all over the world. However Elsa Peretti is remembered, whether as jewelry designer, fashion model, saavy business woman, outrageous celebrity, or philanthropist, this remarkable woman and her prolific work will be admired and acknowledged for many years to come.

References

Shirley, K., (22 March, 2021). Remembering Tiffany Jewelry Designer Elsa Peretti (1940-2021). https://www.forbes.com/sites/kristenshirley/2021/03/22/remembering-tiffany–co-jewelry-designer-elsa-peretti-1940-2021/?sh=5a5a0d2867d3

Wikipedia, (16 April, 2012). Elsa Peretti. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elsa_Peretti

Muller, J., (16 Ocotber, 2018). The Lasting Legacy of Elsa Peretti. http://www.primadarling.com/fashion/the-lasting-legacy-of-elsa-peretti/

Gates, A., (21 March 2021). Elsa Peretti, Star Designer of Elegant Jewelry, Dies at 80. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/03/21/fashion/elsa-peretti-dead.html

Borrell-Persson, L., (19 March, 2021). Jewelry Designer Elsa Peretti Has Died. /article/elsa-peretti-jewelry-designer-obituary

Tiffany & Co, (2021). About Elsa Peretti. https://www.international.tiffany.com/world-of-tiffany/about-elsa-peretti/

Nando and Elsa Peretti Foundation, (n.d.). About the Foundation. https://www.perettifoundations.org/en/page.php?project=0&page=5&cat=6&con=8

[padfootagain]

Hello everyone! I'm so happy to host a new event for my blog! It has been a while since I made one of these writing events, and I hope you will enjoy it! I've organized it to celebrate my blog hitting 4.7k followers!!! This is unbelievable, tbh, I have no idea what you guys are doing around here, but thank you so much for it anyway!!

So, for the coming weeks, I'll be writing your requests, that you can send me using the prompts I'm proposing in this post, under the cut! I hope you'll have fun!

 Carole, what is going on now?

 For this event, I'll be answering some prompts! The idea is simple: you choose one of the characters I write for and a few prompts, and I will write a one-shot for the character you have chosen, using the prompts you have chosen. You can also indicate more details that you would like to be included in your request (a specific AU or situation… ). It's super easy, and it makes you choose what I'll write for the next 2 or 3 weeks!

 How do we request something?

 In order to send a request, all you have to do is send me an ask through my inbox (please, do not use the dms, it is much harder to manage for me and I will probably forget about your request…). You can choose between 1 and 5 prompts amongst the prompts listed below the cut. The prompts are pieces of dialogue, and it will be my job to imagine a scenario where the characters use these lines. Choose also a character. It has to be a character in my masterlist (at the exception of Billy Russo and Regulus Black, their requests are closed). If you're a little shy, don't hesitate to switch on the anon function, I will still accept your request! Please, only ask for one request, because I want to write for as many people as possible.

And that's it! Super easy, isn't it?

 A sum up?

 In order to get a one-shot:

-Choose a character in my masterlist (except for Billy Russo and Regulus Black, their requests are closed)

-Choose between 1 and 5 prompts that you would like to see appear in your one-shot. There are 100 of them, and they are all gathered below the cut! No need to send me the whole prompt, just send me the number corresponding to your prompts!

-Send me a message through my inbox (no private messages)

-You can only make one request, so choose wisely ;)

-You can ask as an anon if you're a little shy

-I'll be working hard on your request, so a little nice message or at least a 'hello' would be lovely :)

 The requests will be open for 48 hours (September 8 – September 10 2020), and they are open beginning… right now! The duration for the opened requests for the event might change, depending on how many requests I receive.

Please, be understanding that there is no way for me to judge if this event will be popular or not. If I receive too many requests, I won't be able to write all of them. I'm sorry if I don't have time to go to your request, please, be understanding if that happens. But maybe I'll have time to write all of them! It is hard for me to judge beforehand.

I hope you have fun with this event, and thank you all again for your support!

The prompts for the event are listed below. For a few of them, they might include several lines. All prompts are given a number, all you have to do is send me the number corresponding to the prompts you want, no need to type the whole thing in the ask.

Have fun!

NB: I have no idea why so many of those give off some serious idiots in love and idiots to lovers energy, but… it happened…

 1."KISSES!"

 2. "You are too far away."

"I am literally on the couch with you..."

"But are you in my arms? No. See? Too far away."

 3. "If you weren't so cute, I would break your legs right now."

 4. "Wait… are you jealous?"

 5. "Stars and tequila. It's perfect."

"No. Stars, tequila and you. That it perfect."

 6."I think I've made a mistake. Very big mistake. The kind that makes me wonder if I should escape to another country..."

 7. "I WANT MY COOKIES!!"

 8. "Maybe I love you a little too much, and that's why it hurts sometimes."

 9. "Does it hurt?"

"Not that... OUCH!"

 10. "I can't believe you got punched in the face."

"For you. I got punched in the face for you."

 11. "It's dark, and it's late, and I'm cold and I'm drenched with this freaking rain and yet all I can think about is that I love you."

 12. "I know you don't love me. It's okay. I will be whatever you want me to be."

 13. "You don't need to love me for me to love you, you know? That's not how loving works. It would save us all from a lot of pain if it did."

 14. "What do you mean you have a date?"

 15. "I propose that we get excessively drunk and then ruin our lives as a consequence. Sounds good?"

 16. "I'll always be here for you. Don't you know that by now? That I'll never leave?"

 17. "I think we need... to make something explode."

 18. "I'm pretty stupid, aren't I?"

 19. "Huh... is that my shirt you're wearing?"

 20. "I miss you. I hate it. I hate you. I love you."

 21. "I'm proud to be with you."

 22. "So... huh... are we gonna mention that you've just snogged me or...?"

 23. "What do you mean lying to your family about us? What do you mean you need a 'plus one'?"

 24. "I have only one thing to say: that is the stupidest idea I've ever heard. Let's do it."

 25. "Huh... were you going to... propose?!"

 26. "Will you marry me?"

 27. "Look... I don't mean to be blunt but... you and me, it's a forever kind of thing. And there's no escape from that."

 28. "Fate? Me loving you, you think it's fate? Nah, it's not fate. It's a choice. I choose to love you and to give you everything I own and everything I am every single day. And that's why what we have is true love."

 29. "Do you have ANY idea of how worried I was about you?"

 30. "I think you've just… puked on my shoes."

 31. "I swear, if you die, I'm going to kill you."

 32. "You're perfect."

 33. "I love you. Do you think you could ever love me too?"

 34. "Cuddles, cuddles, cuddles!"

 35. "I'm sorry. For everything. I'm not going to ask you to forgive me though, cause I know that I don't deserve it."

 36. "Just… shut up and kiss me."

 37. "Please… stay."

 38. "But if you leave now, what am I going to do with the rest of my life?"

 39. "I don't want anything but you."

 40. "You deserve so much more than what I can give you."

 41. "I wish I did, but I don't deserve you."

 42. "You make me so happy, it hurts a little."

 43. "What if we don't make it?"

 44. "Are you… are you bleeding?"

 45. "I… I'm begging you… if you must kill someone, then kill me. But please, please… let him/her go."

 46. "I can't lose you."

 47. "What do you mean… you're pregnant?"

 48. "You are so annoying…"

 49. "You're an idiot. I love you."

 50. "Don't leave me. Don't ever leave me…"

 51. "Well… that was hot."

 52. "So… good morning?"

"We're in the same bed. What the fuck are we doing in the same bed?!"

 53. "I mean, we don't have a choice… there's only one bed. And I am not sleeping on that dirty carpet."

 54. "Us being together, it's a terrible idea."

 55. "LOOK! IT'S SNOWING!"

 56. "This is the worst Halloween costume I have ever seen."

 57. "Promise you'll always love me."

 58. "I need your word. Promise me that you'll come back to me."

 59. "So… does that mean… farewell?"

 60. "I think we’re excellent at making memories.”

 61. "Did you… did you sleep with him/her?"

 62. "Where are you?"

 63. "BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!"

 64. "Dear God… I'm surrounded by idiots…"

 65. "I don't want you to go with him/her. I want you to choose me instead."

 66. "What if we stayed in bed all day?"

 67. "You fool! Fear my wrath!"

"Babe, you're threatening me with a broccoli, it is not very convincing."

 68. "Karaoke night!"

 69. "I am full of surprises!”

“Sadly, yes, you are...”

 70. "Dance with me. Please?"

 71. "I would do anything to convince you to give me a chance."

 72. "I know it's hard. I know that life keeps on getting in the way. But I love you. I love you with my entire being, and I'm willing to fight for you. I'm willing to fight to keep you."

 73. "Are you… are you crying?"

 74. "Stop stealing my blanket!"

 75. "Happy New Year!"

 76. "Merry Christmas!"

 77. "Is that for me?"

 78. "Happy birthday!"

 79. "So… is that… a date?"

 80. "What do you mean it was a date? It wasn't a date!"

"Of course, it was a date!"

 81. "Well… that… was a good kiss…"

 82. "I'm a complete moron! I'm an idiot! I am the epitome of stupidity! It took me forever to realize it, but now I see it, and I'll be damned if I let you walk away. Because it took me all that time to realize it, but I love you. I love you so much. It's always been you."

 83. "Are you drinking my cocoa?"

 84. "Please, just… hold me. Please, hold me close."

 85. "I'm cold."

"I'll keep you warm."

"Nice try!"

 86. "It hasn't stopped snowing. We're stuck. We're gonna die."

 87. "I AM NOT DYING HERE! IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE! WITH YOU!"

"I know that the important information here is that we're gonna die, but I'm very upset that you don't want to do it specifically with me. Why not? I'm a dream!"

 88. "Can I try some of your food?"

 89. "I should have told you long ago."

"Tell me what?"

"That I love you."

 90. "I am not going through a thirty-hours drive with you. There is absolutely no way."

 91. "I used to hate you. Then, I simply disliked you. Now, I hate you all over again."

"Well, the feeling is mutual. But maybe it'll change."

 92. "I really like you."

"I love you."

 93. "Well, if you really were that clever, then you would know that I love you!"

 94. "You have fever, you need to drink this. Come on, now."

 95. "I just… I feel like I'm truly myself when I'm with you. I want to be myself when I'm with you. So now, if you're scared, don't call it love yet. But whatever you want to call it, it's incredible, and I'm not going to give up on this. I'm not going to give up on us."

 96. "You're my home."

 97. "Why is summer so hot?! I'm melting!"

 98. "Have you ever felt like… memories get attached to a word and they almost change their meanings? Like… whenever someone says 'apple' I think of my grandma's pies, to the point that I almost forget that they're talking about the fruit. Well… your name… it's the same for love. When I think of love, I think of you."

 99. "What wish did you make?”

“To spend the rest of my life with you.”

 100. "If you only let me spend the rest of my life with you, I'd be happy with that. I don't ask for anything else, really. My life is complete as long as you're in it."

[kingfallsamtranscripts2]

King Falls AM Episode Twenty: Referencing Aladdin Don’t Make It Right

King Falls AM Transcript

Episode 20: Referencing Aladdin Don’t Make It Right

Run time: 22:17

First Aired: Feb 15, 2016

Summary: Sammy & Ben get a quick update on the little ones off Route 72 and learn live on-air that not everyone had a great evening on the night of the Valentine’s Day Dance.

(For a list of characters and references from this episode see the end of this post)

[King Falls AM theme plays]

Troy: Hey folks, if you or anyone you know has any information on these hybrid werewolf slash human baby thingamagigs-

Sammy Stevens: Is that a technical term, Troy?

Ben Arnold: Can you please let Troy finish, Sammy, this is important!

Troy: Heh, thanks, little buddy.

Ben: Go on, Troy.

Troy: Well if you see those little beasts or have information on them you just got to let us know. Don’t harbor them, they could have the rabies and or the colic. And please don’t try to adopt while it’s in its human form, cause that ain’t gonna end up well. Just use your common sense and be safe.

Sammy: Thanks for calling in officially with police business and alerting the public to the issue.

Ben: Yeah, nice hearing from you on the job, Troy.

Troy: Whilst I’m still on official police biz, I’d like to make one more little statement if I could, fellas.

Ben: Dude, of course! The floor is yours!

Troy: Well the sheriff is a real foul mood regarding these hybrid wolf babies and what have you just running amok, and he wants to make it completely, perfectly, crystal clear that if anyone should have these animals or any other illegal animals in the city limits of King Falls, they will be apprehended and exterminated on site with extreme force of malice. King Falls is a zero tolerance town for any illegal animals of any kind, up to and including wolf-human hybrids.

Ben: So… uh (clears throat) you’re saying that anyone listening that may have access to a cute and cuddly but illegal animal should do… what?

Troy: Now I’m not talking to no one in particular, I mean this isn’t a warning, it’s just a fact. Sheriff Gunderson is making it a personal project to bring down any and all animals that shouldn’t be in town.

Sammy: But cats are fine, is that right, Troy?

Troy: No doubt about that. Ain’t nobody gonna get any cats while I’m patrolling the streets, friends.

Sammy: There you have it, folks. If you or anyone you know has any information on the werewolf puppies last heard from around Route 72 or any other illegal animals not allowed in the city, please contact the sheriff’s department at once.

Ben: (sounding strained) Thanks for the info, Troy.

Troy: All you listeners, you stay safe out there, alright?

Sammy: Thanks, Troy. We’ll talk to you soon, sir.

Troy: Roger that, Sammy.

[The sound of a phone hanging up]

Ben: (clearing throat) Well… that’s good information there, huh?

Sammy: Are you okay, Ben?

Ben: Yeah! You know, I’m just… I’m not a fan of the idea that Gunderson is sending out gangs of thugs to dispatch animals, man! Aren’t there real issues for law enforcement in this town? Last week, I saw old lady Turner jaywalking in front of the grocery store.

Sammy: So you’d rather Gunderson take down the organized jaywalking underbelly of King Falls?

Ben: No, I actually helped her cross the street, but the point is that this werewolf issue seems like an animal control issue! Let Ralf Harkins take care of this! Why are the police even involved, man?

Sammy: Your guess is as good as mine. Moving forward-

Ben: Yeah! Yeah, uh, moving forward we’ve got about thirty minutes of open calls lined up before acclaimed ebook author Kirk Sycamore- don’t judge this, Sammy- will be joining us to talk about his new book Dead Tom Turkey: The Perils of Uncooked Poultry.

Sammy: I’m sorry, what now?

Ben: I mean… it’s a thing. Undercooked anything can’t be good, right?

Sammy: I would assume, but seemingly that one sentence just covered everything you need to know. Cook it longer.

Ben: Then it might get dry. I don’t know man! Don’t look at me like that! Merv emailed and asked to book this guy. His book topped Beauregard’s King of King Falls, it’s got to be worth something, right?

Sammy: The perils of uncooked poultry.

Ben: In thirty minutes.

Sammy: I don’t know if I can hold this excitement in for thirty minutes, Ben. You must be bursting at the seams! Surely you’ve waited your entire journalistic career to talk about under-broiled birds.

Ben: Uh, if it makes this any better, apparently this is a novel, not an instructional guide.

Sammy: (outraged) That actually makes it worse! This is a fictional piece of work?!

Ben: Merv emailed this to us, Sammy.

Sammy: Listeners, please immediately stop what you’ve got going on and mark this down: I’m going to do my damndest to get you the info on Merv’s book of the month club. I’m on your side and I am fighting for you.

Ben: Merv, if you are listening, I do not need to be cc-ed on the email you are penning. 

Sammy: (laughs) You heard it folks, that’s coming up quickly, but until then we are taking your calls, King Falls. What would you like to talk about this evening, Ben?

Ben: Whatever’s clever. 

Sammy: Talking about whatever’s on your minds before what is sure to be a Pulitzer winning interview. 

Ben: It’ll be good- you’re making fun- but it’ll be good. 

Sammy: How could it not be? You heard our story, King Falls, now let’s hear yours. 

Ben: Give us a call at the station- 424-279-3858, or hit us up at the tweet machine!

Sammy: That’s @ kingfallsam and @ kingfallssammy respectively. Line seven you are on the air with King Falls AM. 

Pete Meyers: You’re saying to yourself: I don’t think Pete Meyers would listen to a show of this terrible quality, as handsome and as smart as he is. He’s probably watching Big Bang Theory or something. 

Sammy: That is exactly what I was thinking, Pete. 

Ben: Word for word, almost. 

Pete: Look, I don’t like talking to the two of you either. 

Ben: Yet you continue to call! And listen! And show up at events!

Pete: Ben if you don’t drop a little bass out of your voice I will roundhouse you right in the gullet the next time I see you. You hear me? I will skullf-(beep) your mom.

Ben: So now you’re threatening me? Do you hear this Sammy?

Sammy: (annoyed) Just hang up. 

Pete: (stammering) Whoa, wait, wait, alright? You know, I’m sorry. I’m a little emotional right now… I would never intentionally try to scuff up my lugs on your face, Ben. I apologize. 

Sammy: I don’t think that-

Ben: What’s the matter? Got a vampire not appreciating the hedge art you’ve been clipping into the bushes?

Pete: Well it’s kind of about him- did you say vampire?

Ben: (triumphantly) Knew it! Man, just fess up and tell everyone that your boss is a vamp!

Pete: Ben Arnold, I just bought domain to your name. And you know what? I’m going to fill up all the pages with babies and donkeys. What’s the world going to think of you? Some weirdo guy, making an internet site about babies and donkeys? Yeah, that’s right-

Ben: (all riled up) Oh yeah? Ooooooh, Pete! Why don’t you come down here, look me in the eyes, when you’re saying this huh? Huh?!

Sammy: Guys. 

Ben: Meanie!

Sammy: Guys! That’s enough. Pete, state your problem or move along. 

Pete: Alright, fine. I messed up big time. Worse than the time I dressed up as Edward Scissorhands for Halloween and ruined Mr. B’s hedges. Apparently I pushed a button or didn’t-really-push-a-button on a fancy thing… that’s beside the point. What I really want to know is- did you guys hear something funny on your station a week or two back?

Ben: Um, um, I’m hearing something stupid right now but I don’t know if that’s-

Pete: Come on, Ben! Be serious. I take you seriously- I almost respect you! Now, I heard a little something like maybe you guys got hijacked or something like that and I just wanted to know… you know, what’s up.

Ben: This again?

Sammy: Wait, Ben, we’ve heard this a few times actually. The shotgun guy said it, we’ve had a number of tweets about it. We don’t know anything about this but apparently another feed cut into ours about a month or so ago. 

Pete: Oh sh-(beep).

Ben: Watch your language, Pete.

Pete: Watch your… face, Ben.

Ben: Wait, what the hell are you and Beauregard up to? 

Pete: None of your damn business. 

Beauregard: (from the background of Pete’s call) Yard boy, what are you doing in this chamber without supervision?

Pete: Uhhhhhhh what? Uh, Mr. B, uh nothing!

Beauregard: Don’t act like an ignoramus around the transmorgrifier. 

[There are metallic clanks and scrapes in the background and the sound of metal pipes moving around. A whirring humming sound begins like a machine turning on which grows steadily louder]

Sammy: What the hell is going on over there? Pete?

Pete: You made me mess up again you butt smackers. 

Beauregard: Don’t just stand there all slack-jawed and drooling. Turn it off this instant. Celestia!

[The whirring cuts off and there is the sound of a call ending]

Ben: What the hell?

Sammy: Well, folks, this is a first for me that I believe an on air failed attempted felony will lead us right into break.

[Cheerful music starts as a commercial begins]

Ernie: Hey there! Ernie Salsado’s leather bound books ain’t your normal bookshop. Maybe you’re asking yourself: Ernie, whatever do you mean? What I mean is that Ernie Salsado’s leather bound books is more than just a hipster reading book nook. We don’t carry none of those cheap-ass paperback books or harlequin novels here, plus you sure as hell ain’t gonna find nothing to read on your I-pad kindle whositswhatsits. For what I understand it’s only first edition leather bound books and (???) up in this joint. Maybe you’re thinking you need to gussy up your place to impress some broad or you have a real need to make people think you got a bigger vocabulary than some Johnny come lately. Either way, Ernie’s got you covered. That’s a book joke! Ernie Salsado’s leather bound books- we got fancy books! F-(beep) you, pay me.

[King Falls AM rock music plays then fades out as the commercial break ends]

Sammy: Ernie Salsado’s leather bound books? There’s two of these stores here? I’ve never even heard of one of them until Rich McGuff! I don’t know what’s more surprising, Ernie’s entrepreneurial rise in the community or him almost making me forget what happened before the break…

Ben: I’m literally afraid to comment one way or another on this. 

Sammy: (amused) He is an intimidating specimen. 

Ben: (carefully and slowly) If he… likes to hear that, then, yes, you are right. If not, please don’t slander that gigantic human!

Sammy: Ha, no slander intended. We’re taking calls and counting down the seconds before we get a riveting interview with the man who some call the Dan Brown of bird related mysteries. 

Ben: Wow, they say that?

Sammy: No, they don’t! (laughs) The phone lines are still lit up, let’s take some calls.

Ben: Good evening, you’re live on King Falls AM. 

Greg Frickard: (smugly) Well look who decided to pick up the phone. 

Ben: (quickly) Um, let’s take another-

Greg: Hey, Sammy! I’ve got a topic of discussion. Let’s talk about how that co-host of yours is just gonna sit there all quiet and not even mention the fiasco he caused earlier this week at Granny Frickards!

Sammy: Greg? Is everything okay?

Greg: Oh, it’s not okay, Sammy. That- pardon my French- moron, that he would even-

[the sound of a call ending]

Ben: Whoops!

Sammy: Ha! 

Ben: Line five you are on with Sammy and Ben!

Sammy: Wow, it looks like you learned a thing or two from Chet, I see. 

Ben: Don’t know what you’re talking about!

Caller: Hello?

Sammy: So what happened at Frickard’s?

Caller: Are you talking to me?

Ben: Nothing happened to… let’s just-

Sammy: Not only are you my broadcast partner, I thought we were friends! 

Ben: Hey! We are friends! I just didn’t think to tell you that I happened to have dinner at Frickard’s earlier in the week.

Caller: Hellooo?

Sammy: Uh huh. This wouldn’t happen to be the same night Emily was on a business meeting with Greg, would it?

Ben: I really don’t recall but it might have been… that’s a good question. 

Sammy: You don’t recall going to your least favorite restaurant in town, which you never eat at, on the night of the King Falls Valentines Day Dance where your main squeeze-

Ben: Watch it.

Sammy: Where the girl you pine for-

Ben: Watch it!

Sammy: Where Emily Potter-

Ben: Thanks.

Sammy: Happened to be roped into a business meeting with Greg Frickard.

Ben: My mortal enemy. 

Sammy: Paid sponsor of King Falls AM. 

Ben: Whatever. 

Sammy: You don’t recall if that’s the night you dined at Granny Frickard’s?

Ben: Ehhhh it’s not really ringing any bells! 

Sammy: Maybe we should call Emily. 

Ben: Don’t do that!

Sammy: Things coming back to you now? 

Ben: Did- ugh… can I fill you in at break and not on the air?

Sammy: You’d better! You know, I’m a little sore that you didn’t tell me to begin with! And this was days ago! 

Ben: I’m sorry, man, it’s just it’s not the best story. Believe me.

Caller: Hello? Can we talk now?

Sammy and Ben: No!

[The sound of a call ending]

Sammy: The turkey guy is not sounding so bad right now.

Ben: Ha, why don’t we try… lucky line one, you’re on King Falls AM. 

Greg: Hey Ben Arrrnold! Why don’t you tell the whole friggin town about you showing your butt and ruining my business meeting with Emily Potter!

Ben: Greg, I really don’t wanna get into this. 

Greg: Ohh, you can’t talk in front of Sammy and the whole town- what’s the matter? Frog got your tongue?

Ben: That's not a saying. 

Greg: You sure didn’t have a problem causing a ruckus at the restaurant! In front of Granny no less!

Ben: Can we take another call, Sammy?

Sammy: Is this true, Ben?

Greg: You can’t deny it, Ben Arnold! I’ve got it on camera from multiple angles! You are a heathen.

Ben: Why do you have me making a scene on camera?

Sammy: Multiple angles?

Greg: I’d like to say it’s just the security cameras… but, if you must know, I hid a few cameras around the Froggery for my big night. 

Sammy: You call a business meeting your big night?

Greg: With Emily Potter I absolutely do! She is the most beautiful creature in King Falls!

Ben: So you admit that it was a date?

Greg: It was a business meeting with a gorgeous woman! Take it as you will!

Ben: You’re so creepy! God!

Greg: Oh, so it’s creepy. Wanting your gramma and your future children to see the moment their future mother and I fell in love? Recorded for prosperity forever. Probably. Classily edited to voice a man and everything. 

Ben: Yeah! It’s creepy!

Greg: (singing) I’ll make love to you! Like you want me to, oh baby hold me tight I will love you all through the night…

Sammy: That is really creepy, Greg.

Greg: You’re just a heathen. You don’t know what love is. What do you know? Tell them what you did, Ben!

Ben: I’m not getting into this on the air, Greg. Let’s just-

Greg: I am a paying sponsor of this show, Ben Arnold! Fess up, right now!

Ben: What are you gonna do, Greg?

Greg: So help me I’m gonna ask Granny- real nice- to pull your sponsorship money!

Sammy: Greg... are you crying?

Greg: (in a high pitched voice) No...

Ben: Hmm, so you’re threatening the show over a personal issue?

Sammy: Greg, we appreciate what you and Granny do for the show and the station-

Greg: I’m glad to see one of you does.

Sammy: But I’m not about to let you threaten taking money away from the station to pressure Ben into talking about something he doesn’t want to. Do what you got to do. 

Greg: Ha! Don’t think that I won’t wake up Granny right now!

Ben: You want to talk about this on air, Frickard?

Greg: Tell the people what you did. Just tell them!

Ben: Ugh, okay. So, I made a reservation for myself at the King Falls best f-(beep)-ing Froggery the same night as your video taped date with Emily. 

Greg: Keep going.

Ben: Jack-In-The-Box-Jesus, this is ridiculous. Sammy, I made a reservation and I made a scene! The end.

Greg: Details, heathen!

Sammy: Details would be nice here, Ben. 

Ben: So, uh, (clears throat) I got there right as Emily was sitting down. 

Greg: At a table right next to ours! He requested it!

Ben: That is also true. 

Sammy: Ah.

Ben: And that’s that! I watched Greg lose his mind. Nature took its course. 

Greg: He ordered every single flambé frog special on the menu.

Ben: Yeah? So?

Greg: Everybody who’s anybody knows that that’s the most romantic frog dish in the world! And you cleaned us out!

Ben: So what? You don’t need romance on a business meeting!

Greg: You ordered twenty of those things just for you!

Ben: And I paid for twenty! What’s your point?

Greg: My point? You didn’t even eat them! You brought in Chipotle!

Ben: Yeah, man! Cause frogs are gross!

Greg: You… you’re gross!

Ben: Oh yeah?

Greg: Yeah. You’re gross! A gross heathen and I… I hate you! I hate you! Ha! I said it. I hate you.

Sammy: Guys…

Ben: I’ll do you one better- I never liked you to begin with. You creep me out. 

Sammy: Ben…

Greg: Well, heh, that’s not what your mom says.

Ben: Don’t you bring my mom into this.

Greg: Your mother things I am a fine, upstanding, entrepreneur, and model citizen!

Ben: She’s an idiot then! Sorry mom.

Greg: Heathen!

Sammy: Guys! (Clears throat) Okay so you disturbed Greg’s meeting with Emily. You ordered food you didn’t eat. I-is that it?

Ben: Basically! He lost it because I was probably in the shot of his candid camera date!

Greg: I lost my temper, but you had it coming! You get Emily whenever you want and I schedule months in advance!

Ben: Yeah, and you did it during the Valentine's Day Dance. Just real messed up, man. You’re a stalker. 

Greg: Who showed up at whose date, Ben?

Ben: I was just having dinner at my favorite sponsor’s restaurant.

Greg: You don’t even like frogs!

Ben: Nobody does!

Greg: Why don’t you tell them how you got escorted off the premises?

Ben: You just did, idiot!

Sammy: If you were just eating, or not eating as the case may be, how did they have the grounds to toss you out of Granny Frickard’s?

Ben: Ugh. I- I may have started throwing tiny hush puppies in Greg’s general direction.

Greg: You, you, you may have? Pah-lease! You were pretending to be Nolan Ryan while you’re lobbing them at my head.

Ben: You had no right to kiss Emily’s hand!

Greg: Well you wouldn’t have even known if you weren’t, you know, stalking us to begin with!

Ben: Yeah? Well, uh, stay away from Emily!

Greg: Well I won’t have a problem doing that since she hates us both.

Sammy: I’m sorry, what’s that, Greg?

Ben: Can we move on… please.

Greg: Emily left in a huff and said she wasn’t a prize to be won. Totally thought she was roleplaying and I called her princess Jasmine… Which she also didn’t appreciate… 

Ben: Nice touch, dumbass. Referencing Aladdin don’t make it right.

Greg: It’s kind of ludicrous when you think about it. I mean, she is a prize to be one. She’s the trophiest of trophy wives to ever be trophy won!

Ben: She’s pretty mad, Sammy.

Sammy: It sounds like she kinda should be…

Ben: She probably hates me now, man. Stupid stunt…

Sammy: I’m sure she doesn’t hate you, Ben.

Greg: Oh yeah, she hates him big time. I mean, she hates us both, but it’s basically a win for me. She was only lukewarm to my intentions but she can’t stand Ben now. She’ll eventually come back around to the Frog Prince if, uh, he’s out of the picture.

Ben: Greg.

Greg: I’ll take your apology on air, Ben. But I would also like it written on a nice piece of cardstock so I can show it to Granny.

Ben: I sincerely hope that you catch a frog-based STD and die.

Greg: And I hope that you find another perfect woman to fall head over heels in love with, Ben, because you just struck out. You stuck out big time.

Ben: You’re an imbecile! Nobody likes eating frogs! It’s 2016, Greg! You’re gross!

Greg: Ha! Shows what you know. Some cultures consider frogs the poultry of the pond.

Ben: Literally no cultures say that!

Greg: Oh yeah? Well ask Kirk Sycamore when he comes on, he’ll show you.

Ben: I’m not asking anybody anything.

Sammy: Greg, I think it’s best if we part ways for the night.

Greg: Fine! No skin off my bubble butt! Later haters!

[The sound of a phone hanging up]

Sammy: I think-

Ben: Can we just go to commercial, Sammy? I just- I can’t right now.

Sammy: D-do you want to? Is that on schedule?

Ben: No! And, no… Ugh, just take a couple more calls before the bird man pops in.

Sammy: Lucky line one you’re live on-

Caller: Hi, Sammy. Hi, Ben…

Sammy: Good evening, Emily. I assume you’ve been listening.

Emily. I’ve been listening.

Sammy: You know what, let me put you on hold so you can talk to Ben off the air.

Emily: No! I’d like to talk to Ben on the air, if you don’t mind, Sammy.

Sammy: You know, I uh… Ben?

Ben: Uh, whatever you want, Emily.

Emily: Okay, you know I don’t hate you, Ben. Far, far from it.

Ben: I’m so sorry Emily. I just, I lost it sitting there, thinking that you were all alone with that creep and-

Emily: You acted like a real ass.

Ben: I know I did!

Emily: I’m not a child, Ben. When I told you that I would love to go to the dance with you, that was the truth. But when I also told you that I was a woman of my word and was going to honor my prior engagements, as stupid and contrived as they were, I meant that too.

Ben: I just-

Emily: You acted like an ass!

Ben: I know, but-

Emily: There’s no explanation that will make this better, Ben! You acted like a jealous boyfriend and I’m not sure if you know this, but you aren’t my boyfriend.

Ben: Can I just say-

Emily: Even if I wanted you to be before, you aren’t. So you have no right to act like this!

Ben: (Pausing) You wanted me to be your boyfriend?

Emily: Before the incident there was no doubt about it.

Ben: After?

Emily: I- I- uh- I can’t let my feelings override the fact that you treated me like a kid, Ben. I am a grown woman! I am a professional woman. I don’t need some white knight to save me from the likes of Greg! And while I appreciate the idea behind it, like I said to you and I said to Greg, I am a person! I have feelings! I’m not a prize to be won! 

Ben: I really messed this up, I’m… I’m sorry. Emily if you’ll just-

Emily: I just- I need some time to evaluate what the next step is. 

Ben: Because you hate me.

Emily: No! Bec- because I lo- I strongly strongly like, probably definitely on the verge of more. I mean, I was scared to death that you were hurt or worse during Lincoln’s revenge! But I was scared even more when I saw you acting like a high school bully during that meeting. 

Ben: You strongly strongly like me?

Emily: I do. But it’s, it’s gonna be a little bit before I can trust you to be okay with that.

Ben: I understand. 

Emily: But I… I wasn’t going to let another minute go by of you think that I hated you. Cause I don’t. But you really need to fix this.

Ben: And I will. I- I promise.

Emily: I hope so. (pause) Ah, goodnight, Sammy. Ben.

Sammy: Goodnight, Emily. We will talk soon.

Emily: I’m sure of it. Ah, I actually wanted to talk to you about being one of the library’s spring break speakers soon. I’ll send you an email.

Sammy: Oh, please do. Anything to get the kids back in the library after, you know, Lincoln’s revenge…

Emily: Thanks, Sammy. Goodnight, guys.

Ben: Hey- hey, Emily?

[The sound of a phone hanging up with a beeping that slowly fades out. The King Falls outro music and credits begin.]

References:

Nolan Ryan: a baseball pitcher.

The Big Bang Theory: A television show.

Edward Scissorhands: a charactor from an old fantasy movie by the same name about a man who had scissors for hands.

Harlequin novels: a trashy romance story.

Characters:

Sammy Stevens, Ben Arnold, Troy, Greg Frickard, Emily Potter, Pete Meyers, Beauregard, Ernie Salsado.

[loquaciousquark]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E82 (Oct. 29, 2019)

Good evening! There’s a lot to talk about tonight, so let’s hop right to it. Pre-roll: a couple of mini-figs of Taliesin & Sam.

Plus, tonight Dani Cam is replaced by Jerry Cam, who responds with an eloquent “I don’t know” when asked if we’re on the internet tonight. These goofballs. Tonight’s guests: Taliesin & Sam, as anticipated.

We open with a cold argument over which side of the couch Sam has ever sat on before. Eventually, we make our way around to tonight’s announcements: the new show Mini Primetime, hosted by Will Friedle, premieres on the YT channel tomorrow at 7:30 PST with Sam as the first guest. PubDraw will air with Marisha & Matt tomorrow at 5pm PST. Undeadwood episode 3 airs this week; Sam didn’t realize it was airing and Taliesin hasn’t seen it. These kids.

Finally, we get to Episode 82: The Beat of the Permaheart

CR Stats: again, briefly derailed by Sam’s heckling. BWF: “A lot of hard work goes into this show.” Sam: “It does not look like it.” This episode set an all time record of natural 20s with 15. Taliesin felt like they were making “so many bad decisions that hardly mattered.” There was a four-episode tie of 14 before, including episode 26. BWF asks Jerry what happened in episode 26. Jerry does not know. Poor Jerry. Cad has given out over 2400 points of healing, which is five times Laura’s healing as Jester, even though he’s only been on the show a quarter of the time. Sam is asked if he understands what a Battle Mercy is. He does not. Jerry does not know this either. Taliesin explains it to us all, including that the pistol does a surprising amount of damage. (Well, he calls it a pop gun. It works. It’s fine.) Nott keeps the lead with the most HDYWTDT’s with 14. “Nott does a lot of damage. She’s a powerful little lady.”

Clay doesn’t understand any of the unnatural life things in the HFB - clones, soul jars - it’s all beyond him. He understands lichdom, but the rest is beyond him aside from the idea of cloning - like, cloning a tree by planting a new branch or grafting trees together. He has not absorbed the science of anything beyond that. “Percy’s sitting in the back of my head in so many of these fights going ‘nope, nope, nope, nope.’“ Caduceus’s very excited about the giant mouth.

Sam is not upset that he wasn’t asked to be in Undeadwood. He understands if he were on it he would be the unmitigated star and the most handsome, instead of part of an ensemble. BWF explains it was mostly about the fact that “Sam was born with a black hole inside him that sucks the joy and community around him inside of him.” Sam: “You know, it’s fine! You don’t need ratings, so it’s fine.”

Jerry, softly: “Brian, we’re thirty minutes in.” I abruptly admire and love Jerry.

Sam really enjoyed playing a large character during the ape polymorph; in the moment, Nott wasn’t giving it a lot of thought, but it was something she’s very interested in exploring and it definitely left a bit of a mark.

Caduceus thought the dreadnought was a shortcut, and he liked the metaphorical aspect of gently surrendering to the “big giant death metaphor” that felt appropriately symbolic, until they actually did it and discovered the very real monster inside.

We are, again, derailed by a primetime TV-esque popup of Will Friedle’s face in the bottom right with a text rollout advertising Mini Primetime tomorrow. BWF is genuinely appalled & speechless and fires everyone.

As regards time flying, both of them feel certain Travelercon will not be allowed to happen without Jester. (That makes one of us...)

Neither of them know what Oban’s final plan is, which is part of why they’re so worried. Is he trying to overthrow something, attack something, is he just causing chaos? They just don’t know. Taliesin likes getting as much information as possible before the confrontation. Sam gives Matt credit: as frustrating as it can be not to have all the answers in this campaign, it’s also a little addictive.

Cosplay of the Week: @baneb1ade on twitter with a genderbent Keyleth. It looks heckin’ AWESOME and his beard is amazing.

Caduceus has noticed Caleb’s hunger for magical power but is treating him like a recovering addict: he’s giving him space and trying to give him some respect & room.

Nott would not have gone into the dreadnought if not pulled in. “I, Sam Riegel, did not want to go in there!” Nott does not walk into a place unless she knows she can get out of it.

Caduceus is a non-aggressive Luddite. He feels it’s aggressive & a bit silly, but not really a threat. You need resources to make technology, so why would technology usurp nature. He does occasionally get a little worried about Nott’s final goals in some of these things. Sam: Nott has two purposes, keeping herself alive and keeping Caleb alive.

A lot of Nott’s violence is goblin instinct; Sam notes that while the lines between Veth & Nott are blurring now, he doesn’t know how much of Veth is really left.

Fanart of the Week: @riquezadilla on twitter with an adorable Beau & Little Willy portrait.

Ha! Arsequeef facetimes in because his tiny picture has moved off the skull for Halloween. He also gives a quick reminder that Mini Primetime with Will Friedle airs tomorrow at 7:30 & it’s hilarious. BWF places the facetiming phone against the skull in replacement. How cute.

Caduceus liked the idea of Jester communing; it’s a weird god, but they can use all the help they can get.

Nott understands how many messages Jester has to message (”she has 12 GB a month”) and doesn’t feel the need to see her family again right now since they saw them so recently.

Caduceus is occasionally irked when Jester puts down the Wildmother, but mostly he’s pretty fine with everything she does.

If Nott could understand something Caleb couldn’t, it’s only because he passed on his knowledge to her as a good teacher & he was having an off night.

Taliesin has two backup characters ready to go in case something happens to Caduceus. However, they’re at the point where unless something disastrous happens, they should be good to go. His main thought was that they were about to waste a very expensive diamond.

Marisha comes to take a nap on their laps. It’s unbelievably heartwarming.

We are again derailed about a very excitingly told story about a puppy placed on top of the fine imported easily-scratched bar top over the weekend. Sam had to leave pilates class because his phone was blowing up & he thought the studio was on fire.

Sam was expecting a world of horrors & a portal inside the dreadnought. Taliesin thought it would be a big metal ship. Marisha thought it would be an interdimensional submarine.

BWF breaks character for a moment to really compliment Jerry on him painstakingly putting together every mini house seen on Undeadwood. It took him two weeks of solid work.

And we out. Have a lovely week, and is it Thursday yet?

[lonespektr]

Day 5 : the owl house season 1

[chromalogue]

Cookie Week 2: The Icening

[Image description: two photographs of individually packaged round gingerbread cookies with colourful icing.  They're from the Pumpkin and Fibre Arts Festival sale October 19, so they've got a Halloween theme.  End image description.]

In September, I did a tonne of work, I thought to clear my schedule of everything but baking and conference paper.  Unfortunately, the people around me went, "Wow, way to go!  Now that we've seen you increase your output, we feel secure in asking you to do these thirty-seven other things!"  So the goal for a workday is four hours working in front of a computer, two hours in front of a bunch of evangelical Christian e-books, and eight hours of kitchen stuff.  It never quite works that way.  

Without getting super technical, last week I was right on schedule until I botched a batch of icing and ended up spending Friday redoing four batches of shortbread and running out of flow icing.  Then, by the end of the night, I found that the botched icing had set anyway.  I started out kicking myself, but then another order came in, this time for four dozen shortbread without icing.  Between the eight batches of shortbread I ended up making, it turns out that I had enough to fill the two orders I've gotten plus a good solid bunch to sell at the market, so even though I'm running a day behind now, it seems to have worked out.

Two fiercely bright spots have been An Unkindness of Ghosts, by Rivers Solomon, and Moon of the Crusted Snow, by Waubgeshig Rice.  Dunno if anyone remembers over the summer I had a nice rant about a terrible book called The Rule of Thr3e.  Well, Moon of the Crusted Snow is the same kind of apocalypse in the hands of an author who doesn't hate people, isn't wrong about pretty much everything all the time, and manages to talk compassionately about a community wisely using limited resources and deciding who is allowed to belong (to an Indigenous community, so way more justified than the other book, which took place in Mississauga) without devolving into some kind of militaristic isolationist Trumpian hellscape power fantasy.  The next Academic Conference for Canadian Science Fiction and Fantasy isn't for another year and a half, but I think I've got my paper.

Also, I think both of my knees are pretty much recovered from the baker's cyst and nasty aftereffects.  Running leaves me stiff but not sore.  I spent a lovely 20 minutes on my parents' trampoline just before we took it down for the season, and the thing that made me stop was the fading light and not wanting to have to disassemble it in the dark.  I still have a little swelling that makes going right down into a squat unpleasant, but I expect that to clear up over the next few months.  And it's a good thing, because I'm on my feet a lot.  Like, a LOT.

My mom was headed down to Toronto in early December anyway, so I'm going down with her and staying with one of my best friends for a couple of days before flying to Dublin on the tenth.  I'm going to use at least one of those days to sneak into downtown Toronto, do some grocery shopping in Chinatown, and spend the day at Robarts Library photographing books I need.  My proposal for a book chapter on the regional gothic in SyFy original films was just accepted, so now I need me some sources on the regional gothic.  I have some already, but they're all Canada-oriented.

Part of my birthday present was conference clothes, and we got those last week.  I knew I'd gone up a jeans size, but since the clothing store in town doesn't sell jeans a size up I've been managing with the old size.  The clothing store she took me to does have jeans in larger sizes, but they're also cut differently so that according to their sizing I went up TWO sizes.  And darn it, I know it doesn't mean anything, but I was the same size for twenty years and when I picked up five pairs of jeans in the new size I thought I wore and nothing fit, I still burst into tears in the store.  The salesperson was very nice and supportive.  And I told her, "I LOVE being a bulldozer, but I feel like I'm in a parking lot for Smart cars."  She patted my shoulder and said she knew exactly what I meant.  But also getting out of the women's clothing store into my usual clothing store that sells work clothes to all sexes was a relief, despite the fact that the latter doesn't carry my sizes.

Started learning Spanish, kind of by accident.  Duolingo let me click on a Spanish story, so now I'm going to see how far I can get in stories alone, without earning any crowns.

I am absolutely certain that I’m working too hard, and have to dial it back soon.  But it’s just a couple more weeks, and then my sales are over and I can concentrate on finishing the paper for Dublin.  

[straykidsnerd255]

Halloween Scare- Ashley Purdy x Reader

Band: Black Veil Brides

Pair: Ashley Purdy x Reader

Song: This is Halloween (female version) The real chanty

Title: Halloween Scare

You were definitely not a fan of haunted houses. You clung to Ashley’s side as the both of you walked through the building. His eyes never leaving the path ahead of you two. “Ashley, I want to go home.” You whispered shaking from the previous fright. Ashley’s arm wrapped around your waist pulling you close to his side. Looking up, you saw the mischievous smile growing on his lips and he bent down closer to your ear. “It’s almost over. You can do it. If you can, I’ll buy you dinner and we can go home and cuddle the rest of the night.” his smirk had died down to a gentle smile as he looked you straight in the eyes. 

You sighed but nodded your head. “Ok. I’m still gonna cling to you every time I get scared.” You said but he just moved you closer to his side if that’s possible and smiled looking ahead. This haunted house was  5 hour walk through, yes it sounds long but that doesn’t matter. What matters is the fact that every turn you happen to go around, something is waiting at the end to jump out and scare the living hell out of you. You turned to Ashley after a particularly scary  jump-scare. “How much longer?” You asked looking up at him. 

He looked down at the small watch that was set for five hours courtesy of the owners of the haunted house they were currently in. “Two and a half hours left. Don’t worry, it’s almost over.” He said pulling you against his chest and kissing the top of your head.  You closed your eyes and took a deep breath before you and Ashley continued your trek through the house. Every scare ripped a scream from your throat and you were positive that you were going to lose your voice by the end of this. 

{Time Skip: 2 hours later}

Thirty more minutes. That’s it. You looked around and noticed the hallway got more narrow than your remembered or liked. You had been claustrophobic for your whole life and this was not helping it. “Ashley, I can’t do this anymore. This hallway is too narrow for me.” Receiving no answer, you looked around to see Ashley was gone. You started shaking hard as you made your way through the narrow hallway. You looked around you in every direction. Everything seemed to pop out now that Ashley wasn’t next to your side anymore. 

Your breathing began to speed up as you moved further and further down the hallway. “Ashley, If your hiding to try and scare me, then you have another thing coming.” You called out trying to get him to answer. You arms instinctively wrapped around your body as you walked. Tears started streaming down your cheeks as you realized that Ashley was nowhere in sight. You tried your best to remove your tears but a certain made you break down in tears.  The creature loomed above you and you couldn’t handle it anymore. 

This may be a five-star haunted house but this is going too far. You were currently running from the said creature with it wailing and growling behind you. You managed to find a safe spot from the creature and you couldn’t have been happier. You checked the watch and nearly sighed in relief if it wasn’t for the creature lurking around outside of your hiding spot. “I have been running for 20 minutes straight. Geez, no wonder I can’t breath.” You mused quietly. You peeked outside of your hiding spot only to come face to face with the creature. Your scream lit up the entire haunted attraction. Ashley immediately turned from his group when he heard your scream. The only time you ever screamed like that was when him and his band had scared you without realizing how easily you get scared.

Ashley and his friends raced back into the haunted house from the exit and they were not prepared for what they saw. You grinned at the person in the scary creature costume. “This is it. I can hear them.” You said to your best friend in the costume. He grinned and right as they rounded the corner, the creature, (your best friend since grade school) turned its head and snarled at them. It stood over your wounded (part of the act) body and narrowed its eyes at them. Ashley was beyond scared now. ‘Why the hell did I leave her alone again?’ he thought racking his brain for ideas on how to get you back.

The creature stocked forward only to pull back and fall on its back laughing. You covered your mouth and tried not to laugh but it got to you and you started laughing. Ashley looked over at you and raised an eyebrow. “What’s going on?” He asked crossing his arms to look upset when really he was relieved. “S-Sorry man. She roped me into this.” The creature said taking its mask off. The boy gave him a smile and waved. “Hello. Pleasure to meet you all, my name is Y/B/F/N. Y/n and I have been best friends since grade school. Take good care of her. She’s like a sister to me.” He said placing the mask back on his head. “Well, I need to get back to work. Have fun on your date Y/n.” Y/B/F called out as he raced back to his spot. 

Before you could stand up, Ashley pulled you into a hug. Your eyes widened and you blinked a few times before feeling his body shaking. Your arms wrapped around him and you pressed a small kiss to the top of his head. “Ash, you ok?” You asked. Ashley shook his head and clung to you tighter. “I thought you literally died. That scream scared the shit out of me.” He whispered but loud enough for you to hear. You smiled and pushed him up so you could look him straight in the face. “I’m sorry. I happened to find my best friend working here and I wanted to get back at you for leaving me.” You said smiling innocently before giving him a kiss. 

“Damn it. You’re so lucky I love you.” 

“What would you do without me.” 

An idea popped into your mind. “You still owe me a dinner date somewhere fancy, plus a movie date at home.” You said tapping his nose with your finger and smiling sweetly. Ashley groaned as he remembered the promise. “Yes. I remember. Let’s finish this haunted house and then all of us can go get some dinner.” He said intertwining your hands together. You smiled happily as Ashley and his friends practically surrounded you the rest of the way out of the haunted house. “I must say though, that scare back there was awesome.” Andy said stuffing his face once they made it to the restaurant. You laughed and took a bite of you food. “I had been planning since the house was announced for the public to go through. The fact that all of us got in for half price was because my best friend works there. I have gone through that house so many times, I’m not scared of the place anymore.” You said earning a gentle smack and glare from your boyfriend. “Hey, don’t act huffy. You left me so I got my revenge.” You said acting defiant. Ashley and his friends began laughing and you in turn started laughing with them. “Alright everyone! Tonight is karaoke night! Who’s going first!” The restaurant owner yelled out. Ashley was shocked when Y/n raised her hand. “I’ll go!” She called out. 

The owner grinned and passed her the microphone. She skimmed through the songs and found the one that she loved. She pressed the song button and then play. The song began and everyone clapped. Ashley knew that she was a flawless singer, but he knew that she was slightly scared of singing in front of people, yet, here she was, standing in front of an entire restaurant preparing to sing a song. Ashley placed his arm on the table and leaned his head against his fist as he watched his girl sing. “That’s my girl.” Ashley said smiling brightly.

Boys and girls of every age

Wouldn't you like to see something strange?

Come with us and you will see

This, our town of Halloween

This is Halloween, this is Halloween

Pumpkins scream in the dead of night

This is Halloween, everybody make a scene

Trick or treat till the neighbors gonna die of fright

It's our town, everybody screams

In this town of Halloween

I am the one hiding under your bed

Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red

I am the one hiding under your stairs

Fingers like snakes and spiders in my hair

This is Halloween, this is Halloween

Halloween! Halloween! Halloween! Halloween!

In this town we call home

Everyone hail to the pumpkin song

In this town, don't we love it now?

Everybody's waiting for the next surprise

Everybody scream, everybody scream

In our town of Halloween

I am the clown with the tear-away face

Here in a flash and gone without a trace

I am the who when you call "Who's there?"

I am the wind blowing through your hair

I am the shadow on the moon at night

Filling your dreams to the brim with fright

Tender lumplings everywhere

Life's no fun without a good scare

That's our job, but we're not mean

In our town of Halloween

In this town

Don't we love it now?

Everybody's waiting for the next surprise

In this town we call home

Everyone hail to the pumpkin song

La La La La La

[mpanighetti]

Halloween Zero-to-Thirty Challenge Rating Challenge

October 4th Prompt: Spoopy

Grinning Gourd (Challenge 3)

Lore

A common decoration for autumnal harvest festivals involves coring a large pumpkin, carving a smiling or scowling face, and placing a lit candle inside. These "grinning gourds" cast their expressions into eerie flickering shadows but mostly provide a harmless spooky ambience. In some cases, however, these visages are twisted by sinister magic to serve the caster's nefarious purposes.

A grinning gourd animated by a magic candle in this manner has no sentience but serves its creator dutifully. They are sometimes employed as covert guards or remote eyes, though their usefulness in these efforts might be limited outside of harvest seasons. Would-be intruders that do not take notice of the gourds can be quickly subdued by their thorny vines until their creator arrives to confront the new captives. If the plants are overpowered, they immediately release their magical lifeforce as their candles explode, dealing one final blow to their opponents and possibly setting off a chain reaction for any other gourds in the vicinity.

Attributes

Small plant, unaligned

Armor Class: 12 (natural armor)

Hit Points: 66 (12d6 + 24)

Speed: 15 ft.

STR: 16 (+3)

DEX: 14 (+2)

CON: 15 (+2)

INT: 1 (-5)

WIS: 12 (+1)

CHA: 1 (-5)

Skills: Stealth +4

Condition Immunities: deafened, exhaustion, prone

Senses: passive Perception 11

Languages: understands the languages of its creator but cannot speak

Challenge: 3 (700 XP)

Proficiency Bonus +2

Special Traits

Explode. When the grinning gourd is reduced to 0 hit points, it immediately explodes in a concussive blast of flame. All creatures within a 20-foot radius must make a DC 14 Dexterity saving throw. On a failed save, a creature takes 16 (3d10) fire damage and is knocked prone. On a succesful save, the fire damage is halved and the creature is not knocked prone.

False Appearance. While the grinning gourd remains motionless, it is indistinguishable from a normal jack-o'-lantern.

Flickering Flame. As long as the gourd has hit points remaining, it emits bright light in a 10-foot radius and dim light for an additional 10 feet.

Actions

Bite. Melee Weapon Attack: +5 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 6 (1d6 + 3) piercing damage plus 5 (2d4) fire damage.

Constrict. Melee Weapon Attack: +5 to hit, reach 20 ft., one target. Hit: The target takes 10 (2d6 + 3) bludgeoning damage, and if the target is a Medium or smaller creature, it is grappled in the gourd's vines (escape DC 13). Until this grapple ends, the target is restrained, and it takes 14 (4d6) poison damage at the start of each of its turns. The grinning gourd cannot use its Constrict action as long as it has a creature grappled in this manner.

Bonus Actions

Reel. The grinning gourd reels in its vines to either move next to a constricted target without spending movement, or to move the constricted creature toward the gourd if the creature is smaller than the gourd or prone.

[id: monster stat block for grinning gourd, depicting three jack-o'-lanterns with runes around their tops with menacing expressions for carved faces, one is holding a knife in its vine]

[Original prompt]