#can you tell I was running out of amino acids by the time I got to Muna 😭

[worstlovesong]

Want some evil ask? 😈 MUNAgenius as amino acid, in honour of that B+ in organic chem 🥰

I’m taking this so seriously get ready lmao

Lucy: tryptophan because it’s a precursor to melatonin and serotonin and her and her music just bring a happiness and peace and comfort that is unmatched

Julien: tyrosine because it is essential in the production of epinephrine, norepinephrine, and dopamine and oh man do I get dopamine from JB and her music. Also like, her music is very much written in the basis of I have these emotions and they’re very heavy and painful but I’m putting them out here so you know it’s okay to be sad, it’s okay to feel them, we can feel it together. Dopamine through catharsis is stored in the Julien Baker.

Phoebe: Asparagine is what I picked for Phoebe. While it’s main function is breaking down ammonia, it also is important for protein modification and the creation of neurotransmitters. Most importantly, it is a highly necessary amino acid and without it cells will begin to die even with high levels of other acids.

I picked this because without Phoebe there wouldn’t be Munagenius, in the sense that yes they’re all established artists and work so well together and apart but Phoebe is the reason Muna is signed to saddest factory, she’s the reason Munagenius became closer, and subsequently toured together. Phoebe is the sunshine glue that holds things together in a lot of situations, in my eyes, and she’s truly just a very vital part of the dynamic <3

Katie: I picked Glutamic acid for Katie because it plays a role in assisting nerve cells sending synapses throughout the brain and therefore plays a role in cognition and learning. Katie is always wanting to learn and connect and I feel like this fits them well

Jo: Valine because it aids in muscle growth and energy production and jojo arms 👀 also they be zooming always

Naomi: phenylalanine is a precursor to tyrosine and therefore also aids in neurotransmitter production. I chose this for Naomi because it also enhances memory, learning, and mood and they’re always learning and being brilliant

[cosmicdahlias]

Impromptu Research

MINORS DNI

After a day of fieldwork, you and your research partner and boyfriend, Ford Pines, are heading home through the forest when you encounter a creature. Ford proposes you help him in some improvised research.

warnings: monsterfucking, cucking, oral, masturbation, p in v, biting, creampie

so i got just a tiny bit creative on this one. i wanted a werewolf without the human part so i took inspiration from cynocephali. they’re technically humans with dog heads, but i altered them a bit to have a full coat of fur and a tail. essentially a werewolf, but different lol.

You and Ford made your way through the dark forest, a cold autumn wind blew through the trees. You two had been out collecting data from a small meteor impact, your bags full of both soil and meteorite samples.

You were Ford’s research assistant, nearly four decades younger than him, but more than that you were also his romantic partner. Sure, the age difference lent itself to its share of issues. Strangers asked if he was your father more times than you could count and he didn’t quite understand your generation’s humor, but you two made it work.

As you continued your trek home, Ford was in the middle of excitedly infodumping about meteors and asteroids.

“-and some meteorites have been found with the evidence of life! Water, hydrocarbons, and amino acids! There’s even a theory, though not widely accepted, that life on Earth originated from asteroids! Imagine if we-“

He went silent, hearing the sound of heavy panting behind him. You both turned to see an intimidatingly huge creature with the head of a wolf and a thick coat of fur as dark as midnight covering his entire body. His gaze was fixed on you, eyes glowing in the beam of your flashlight. His scarlet, knotted cock twitched, almost as if at the sight of you. Everything about this creature screamed werewolf.

“Y/n, stay close to me.” He whispered.

The creature approached you, coming in incredibly close and licking your neck with his long, wet tongue.

“Oh thank goodness! I thought we had a werewolf on our hands, but it appears what we have here is a cynoceph.” Ford sighed in relief.

“A what?” You asked.

“A cynoceph, they’re much more common to run into than a werewolf as they tend to live close by humans. They’re actually called cynocephali, but I just call them cynocephs to shorten things.”

“He looks like a werewolf to me. How can you tell the difference?” You whispered anxiously, his calm voice did little to alleviate your fear.

“Yes they can be hard to distinguish, but unlike werewolves, cynocephs lack a human form. They’re nonverbal as they do not possess human vocal cords, yet they perfectly understand speech and communicate through nods and gestures, they can even be fluent in sign if taught, they’re very intelligent on a level equal to us, and incredibly docile, but most interesting of all they-“

The cynoceph pressed his knotted cock against you.

“have an insatiable lust for humans. From the looks of it, this one has chosen you as his mate.”

You blushed, desire pooling between your thighs.

Ford chuckled. “You know, I think we have a rare opportunity here. I’ve always wanted to see how they mate with a human. If you’re willing, we could do a little impromptu research.”

He turned to the cynoceph.

“My friend, would you be interested in participating in this study?”

The wolfish creature nodded enthusiastically and Ford returned his attention to you.

“How about you, my dear?”

“I want to, but don’t know, look at the size of his cock.”

The cynoceph gave a pitiful whine, and looked at you with puppy-dog eyes.

“Come on, look at him. Don’t you want to know what it’s like to be stretched out, to be impossibly filled with cock? You’re the self-labeled ‘monsterfucker’ after all. Isn’t this what you’ve always wanted? Just imagine what being knotted would feel like.” Ford coaxed.

He was right. You had an affinity for creatures most people would consider monsters. And of all the creatures you’ve read about or studied in person, werewolves always appealed to you the most, but they were rare and incredibly dangerous. A cynoceph would more than satisfy your fantasies and… there was no way you could resist that face.

“I’ll do it.”

The cynoceph wagged his tail.

“Good girl, now strip for him.”

You followed his instructions, the cynoceph watched you hungrily. You pulled off your top, unhooking your bra and sliding the straps off of your arms. You unbuttoned your jeans and slipped them down your legs and hooking your thumbs in your panties, letting them fall onto the pile of your discarded clothes. The cynoceph’s cock throbbed.

“Now get on all fours and present yourself to him.” Ford instructed.

You did as he said, getting on your hands and knees on the leaf littered ground. You expected to be rammed with cock, but instead felt his muzzle against your pussy, tongue lapping at your clit.

Ford chuckled. “Such a gentleman.”

“G- good boy.” You whimpered.

The cynoceph wagged his tail at your praise. Ford unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock, stroking it.

“I’m aware that touching oneself while conducting research is a bit unorthodox, but I just can’t resist. Good god, watching you being pleasured by a creature like this is so arousing.”

Your moans echoed loudly through the forest. The cynoceph licked at you greedily. You felt your orgasm build, you pressed yourself against his tongue.

“Oh god, I- I’m gonna- hnnn.” You moaned.

“That’s it, cum on his tongue.”

You cried out as you felt a pressure within you explode, cumming against the cynoceph’s maw. He unfurled his tongue inside you, immediately eliciting a second orgasm.

“Ohhhhh jesus, he’s so good at this, fuuuuuuuck.” You panted.

The cynoceph removed his tongue. He angled his thick, maroon cock at your entrance and shoved himself inside, stopping at his knot. You moaned at the feeling of being torn in half.

“H- how come he didn’t knot me?” You whimpered.

“If he knots you now he’ll be stuck and won’t be able to fuck you, he’s saving that for when he breeds you.” Ford stated.

The cynoceph pumped you hard and fast, his hands gripping your hips, claws digging into your soft flesh.

“How does it feel?” Ford cooed, stroking his cock.

“Incredible.”

“That’s my girl. You’re taking him so well.”

“How about you, my good sir, do you find my partner as pleasurable as I do?”

The cynoceph nodded fervently, huffing and panting, his tongue hanging from his maw, saliva dripped onto your back. You moved yourself back on him and he whined in approval.

“Good girl, work yourself on his cock, make him feel good.”

The cynoceph worked you at a steady rhythm, you matched his pace against him.

“B- bite me, please.” You begged.

He leaned over and bit down on your shoulder, hard enough to leave bruise, but not enough to break the skin. You whimpered, tightening around him.

Ford increased the speed of his hand on his cock.

“Dear god, you look so perfect like this, taking his cock like a good girl.”

The cynoceph gritted his teeth and began to move himself at a blindingly fast pace, a strong indicator that the was close.

“Are you ready for him to knot you? He might just impregnate you with his pups. Do you want that, sweetheart?” Ford cooed.

“Uh- uh huh.” You whimpered.

“And you, do you wish to breed my partner?” He said, addressing the cynoceph.

He nodded eagerly and slammed the full length of his cock deep inside you, his knot stretching you overwhelmingly wide. You screamed loudly in a beautiful mixture of pleasure and pain. The cynoceph howled into the night, his cum filling you to the brim. Ford gave a loud moan as his cum spilled onto the forest floor.

You trembled and collapsed to the ground, exhausted. The motion caused the cynoceph to fall on top of you with a yelp, you winced as you felt his knot tug painfully at your insides.

“Now careful sweetheart, he can’t pull out just yet, he has to soften inside you. The role of the knot is to ensure that every drop of seed can serve its potential purpose, giving the mate the best chance at being impregnated. This is perfect though, it’ll give me time to properly study him and document our experiment.”

He pulled out his journal from his trench coat, he had recently started his fourth one. He clicked his pen and began sketching the cynoceph and you in the midst of breeding. You were definitely going to steal a picture of this entry to keep on your phone for… reasons. He finally finished the sketch and began writing.

“My dear y/n and I encountered one of the oft sighted cynocephali that reside in the forests of Gravity Falls! As stated in my previous entry about them, these poor creatures are far too commonly mistaken for the aggressive werewolf, leaving them deprived of the human contact they so desperately crave.

“I offered my dear partner the chance to help me in my curiosity to see one mate. They were hesitant at first, but agreed with some gentle coaxing. This is something they have always expressed interest in, so I knew they were letting their anxieties about the size of the cynoceph’s cock get ahead of them.

“I watched as they undressed, sank to their hands and knees, and presented themselves to him. I must admit I had forsaken all formalities, unable to resist stroking myself. Seeing my partner so willing to help me in my research was beyond arousing. I never considered myself one for cuckoldry, but if I know myself, my never ending thirst for knowledge has awakened many things in me over the years.

“I was very much expecting the cynoceph to cut to the chase and unceremoniously slip himself inside them, but was surprised to see this creature display chivalry, pleasuring my partner with his tongue. He made them orgasm not once, but twice! A true gentleman if I’ve ever seen one. Human men have no excuse, if a creature of the forest is privy to wonders of clitoral stimulation, then it should not be as arduous as it’s made out to be by chauvinistic neanderthals.

“Watching my partner take his cock was incredible. For a second I thought maybe it would be too much for them to handle, but as I have come to learn, they are not afraid to mix pain and pleasure. They moved themselves back on him, the cynoceph enjoyed this greatly. My partner couldn’t resist having him indulge in their odaxelagnia, they will surely be left with a bite shaped bruise for weeks. When he came he sharply inserted his full length, knotting my partner. Dear moses, that is an image I will savor in my mind forever.

“As I write this we are currently waiting for him to soften inside them. Part of me hopes that y/n wants to do this again, perhaps if there is a next time maybe he’ll even share them with me. I would love to be inside their mouth as he’s breeding them.”

As Ford finished writing and put away his journal, enough time had passed for the cynoceph to pull out. You shakily rose to your feet, putting on your clothes. You pressed a kiss to his muzzle.

“Thank you.” You whispered.

You both started to continue your way home when you heard a whine behind you, turning to see that same puppy-dog face he had shown earlier.

Ford chuckled. “I think he’s grown rather attached to you, y/n.”

“Poor thing, I hate to just leave him here. You don’t suppose we could… bring him back with us?”

Ford sighed. “As much as I’m all for it, I don’t think Stanley would appreciate the shedding.”

“Ugh that’s a good point.”

You stepped closer to the cynoceph, putting a hand to his soft chest.

“How about this, we can try to come back once a week, sound good?”

He wagged his tail and nodded, barking happily.

“Good boy.” You cooed.

[electromelancholy]

I was so bewitched by kim's rugby thigh fantasy I--

DINGY HOT DOG CART — For as long as you can remember, this hot dog cart has graced the corner of Rue St. Gerard and Abattu Street. The awning was once a striped red and yellow: now, it is mostly covered in mud and moss. 

SHIVERS — You have been going to this cart for over twenty years of meat. You’ve only been sick twelve times. 

PAIN TOLERANCE — Not too bad, if you think about it. 

ENDURANCE — You and Kim have been up since four in the morning to get ahead of this case before it spins out of control. It’s the closest place to eat to the station, and he agreed to stop for some food before calling it a day. 

EMPATHY — His eyelids droop from behind his glasses. He’s dead on his feet. 

ENCYCLOPEDIA — You are too. To keep yourself from falling asleep you’ve been chattering on nonstop. 

REACTION SPEED — Wait. What are we talking about?

YOU — “So, she translates three-dimensional positions of amino acids into notes based on x-ray crystallography data… You can get familiar with different proteins just by getting familiar with the music of their structures… It’s so hardcore.”

ENCYCLOPEDIA — Hey, it’s better than the first randomized fact I could have talked about.

KIM KITSURAGI — He doesn’t look like he minds one way or the other about Linda Long’s molecular music or your attempts at conversation. He looks far, far away. 

PERCEPTION (SIGHT) [Medium: Success]: You turn to look behind you. Approaching is a pack of seven men: young, fit, jogging. They must be party of a rugby team; well built and tanned from the sun. 

KIM KITSURAGI — His eyes are barely open as he stands, but it’s clear to you—he’s staring. 

(Suggestion) Ask Kim to tell you a secret.

(Physical Instrument) Run with the Rugby Team. (-2, too tired even for rugby)

(Inland Empire) Stare too.

CHECK SUCCESS

INLAND EMPIRE — You watch as the men approach. Their sneakers bounce against the pavement and the rest of them follow. Their shorts move with their thighs, decorated with hair and lines of strong muscle. Their stomachs poke out a bit from their shirts, a size too small, maybe from too many rounds in the wash. A thick patch of hair there. Their arms, powerful, pumping with the synchronization of a healthy team. Chest hair grows up their neck and into their well-trimmed mutton chops, and then their long, wavy hair. 

EMPATHY — Don’t these men look… Familiar?

PHYSICAL INSTRUMENT — Been a while since you’ve had thighs like that, son. Sorry to say.

PERCEPTION (SIGHT) — You blink through the haze of your thoughts. These men don’t *actually* look like you: this one’s got short hair, that one has dark freckles, another still is six feet tall. 

INLAND EMPIRE — You blink through the haze of reality. These fantasies smell like pine and motor oil. And they all wear your face.

LOGIC — No.

SUGGESTION — It has to be.

PERCEPTION (SMELL) — This is a bona fide Kimthought.

ELECTROCHEMISTRY — Yeah, baby! Kitsuragi’s been *thinking* of *you*!

YOU – Your face goes bright red as the Harries jog past you. One’s wearing nothing but his underwear—those shorts you slept in the last time he stayed the night on the couch. 

MUCH HOTTER HARRY — He scratches the dome of his stomach as he passes, much in the same way you must have when you went to grab a drink of water in the night. 

PERCEPTION (SIGHT) — We thought he was asleep!

ELECTROCHEMISTRY — Well, it’s certainly seared into his dreams. Look at the fit on those boxers. Just tight enough for the front to gape open when you walk. 

KIM KITSURAGI — His face betrays nothing as he lets the last of the Harries jog past him and down the street. He’s too tired to turn after them. 

(Suggestion) Ask Kim to tell you a secret. (+3, Harry Parade)

CHECK FAILURE

YOU — “What’re you thinking about?” 

KIM KITSURAGI — He blinks, looking at you with a start. The tips of his ears go immediately pink. “Nothing,” he says, as cooly as he can muster it. 

YOU — The truth comes out before you can stop it. “I don’t actually look quite like that.”

KIM KITSURAGI — The pink of his ears flush dark, dark red. He opens, then closes his mouth. He turns to watch the backs of the rugby players, then back to you. “What!?”

YOU — “All your thoughts smell the same.”

KIM KITSURAGI — The Lieutenant looks as if he’s ready to be eaten by the concrete below him. “What…”

YOU — “Either way, I used to play rugby. I think. You weren’t too far off. Maybe by two decades.”

SAVOIR FAIRE [Medium: Failure] — You try to wink, but end up blinking twice.

KIM KITSURAGI — It is just gameless enough to calm him a bit. It takes him much shorter than he thinks it should to accept the reality that you can somehow smell his thoughts. 

EMPATHY — The lieutenant *truly, truly* trusts you.

ELECTROCHEMISTRY — And thinks you’re a total sex beast. Let’s return to that, right? We’re gonna get back to that?

VOLITION — Patience. For now—food, sleep, and time. 

[rantgical]

Have you ever seen an engineer who doesn't want to build anything?

I haven't.

I don't know what I want to do though.

I like it when I have clear instructions and I can do the work with my own two hands. I don't have to talk to anyone if I don't want to and once I've finished my work, I can submit the results to whoever it is I need to give it to and that's that.

I'll have done a good job. They'll thank me for helping out and I either look for the next thing or I clock out.

A factory worker. I'm describing a factory worker. Or an office job. I said I don't want an office job.

I don't.

Office politics are a nightmare and no job pays enough for you to comfortably live anymore.

I've seen my parents work their life away for their children. I don't want to do that. I want to be able to spend time with them.

I want things to be easy. But things are never easy. But why does it have to be like that? Who decided things had to be hard? When did things become hard?

Some people believe it's still for me. That even though I don't fall into the typical engineer stereotype I can still become a great engineer.

But what makes an engineer, an engineer?

I don't know. I was asked did I like the engineering class in college. I did.

But did I like it because the prof was nice and the work was easy? Or did I like it because I genuinely enjoyed the projects?

I think it's the former.

And that's terrifying. Because I can't afford to turn back. I don't have the money for it. My parents don't have the money for it.

And even if I do switch what do I switch to? Bio? Pure science? I like learning about how life on the planet is. But I hate writing papers and having to do research on things I don't necessarily care about.

I always end up falling down some kind of rabbit hole when I do research. And then eventually I get bored and don't want to research the thing anymore even though I haven't written the paper yet.

I hate how much I don't 'fit in' because I don't like building things. I don't like cars, I don't like techy things, I don't like designing things. I do art in my spare time. I told myself I'd write on the side and see if my writing takes off.

But somewhere along the way I forgot how to express myself in a coherent way. My thoughts and inner monologue are what end up on the paper and suddenly the writing only makes sense to me. I'm not telling a story anymore I'm just venting.

Write. Write. Write. Create characters who are your personal cheer squad. Create a world where you are in control. Spiral deeper and deeper and deeper into the recesses of your own mind. Who cares what the story is?

I have become quite the selfish person. Even my writing has become something only for myself. I no longer care if it's coherent or not.

What do I do? Where do I go? Have I just been going through the motions this whole time? People's words are a blur. I don't understand what they're talking about.

I feel so happy working an intern's job. Maybe I'm just happy to be thanked or praised.

Maybe I'm just happy to be useful.

Their gratitude is intoxicating.

Gratitude, praise.

They are few and far in between when you're a university student.

The feeling is trumped by anxiety and stress and burn out.

Am I afraid of losing that gratitude?

No, that's not right. I know that's what I'm afraid of.

Blend into the scenery. Nodding along without understanding a thing.

That's what I'm afraid of.

"Regi do this, Regi do that. Regi what was the data you got for this, Regi did you do this thing when you ran the experiment?"

Those sentences I understand.

"Separate the cream, take the extract, resuspend the sample, centrifuge again, do it three more times."

I understand those words.

Centrifugation separates the solid cell walls from the cytoplasm inside. DNA is unpacked and broken into their nucleotides and amino acids. How much of a certain amino acid is in the sample? Run a test.

The dryers use thermodynamics. Increasing temperature and lowering pressure turns water into gas and leaving only solids. Lowering temperature , then pressure to an extreme amount turns solids into gas, to increase the speed of sublimation, increase temperature while keeping a constant pressure.

It makes sense. The graph makes sense.

So why did it not make sense when I learned it in class?

Why does the math make my head spin?

I am at the point where everyone is more intelligent than me. Therefore I am seldom useful. At least not in the way I think I should be.

I nod along and that seems to satisfy them. Of course it seems so, most of the time people just need someone to listen to them.

Maybe that's what I'm afraid of. I am afraid of not being needed anymore. I am afraid of becoming a parasite onto other people. Someone who cannot give anything valuable on return for the aid they graciously provide me.

Because why keep around someone who takes and takes and takes?

[maggyoutthere]

| Red, Purple and Orange

This blog is now just me re-uploading stuff from my Amino accounts. More stuff from that AHIT Au I have. Spooky stuff with the Moonjumper. Also legit one of the things I'm the most proud of writing? Like ever?? I'm never repeating this again so hhh I wanna save it-

Anyways a few tws because this is a bit spooky. Nothing gory or unnerving happens but I know some people don't like just scary stuff in general so that's your warning

(this used to be divided in 2 parts but eh who needs that)

-

Red, purple and orange.

The whole manor was covered by them. Both inside and outside. Vivid warm colors embraced the whole building as if it was a strong loving hug from a long lost friend. It made the house itself warm. Red, purple and orange. These colors painted the empty dusty hallways as the house remained silent... or as silent as it could. The wooden floors and doors still creaked if touched, and the water running through the old pipes inside the walls made them rustle. The yellow light from outside created bridges of light as it entered through the windows. It had been a very very long time since something like that happened. Red, purple and orange. These colors painted the dusty and... not so empty hallways.

Hat Kid ran through the hallways of the manor. She giggled happily as her little feet thumped through the old wooden floors of the house, her yellow rubber boots squeaking as she ran. She'd put her yellow cape away since the weather started getting hotter. She'd never experienced something like this happening in Subcon. The cold Winter was over and Spring was rolling in with its warm sun and change of scenery. The kid had never seen the Subcon Forest so colorful. It was either always restricted to its ghostly dark purples or its ice-cold blues.

The trees were the most mesmerizing thing to look at. She'd never seen such colorful things. Their leafs were red, purple and orange. The tall trees towering over her and the entire village no longer seemed threatening or even scary. They looked like they'd come right out of a fairytale! The best part was that, when the sun was bright enough, like on that day, the leafs would reflect their colors on whatever was down below. As much as she loved the winter months she spent with her BFF and Vanessa, she couldn't fake it: she was absolutely amazed by this change of scenery.

A little after last year's Christmas, in the middle of January, Vanessa finally got the courage to give Hat Kid her very own Christmas gift. She felt bad for not giving the kid anything back on that day. And after the beautiful gift she'd given to her auntie... it didn't matter what it was. The point was that she found someone who she could trust. This little child who one day invaded her house, looking for some "time piece" thingy that Vanessa didn't even knew was there, had now become the closest she could call a friend.

On a cold winter morning, Vanessa woke up Hat Kid to a wonderful breakfast in bed and a small present. The queen explained to her the whole thing and offered her the shiny box. Still nomming on a freshly baked cookie, she teared through the wrapping paper, her eyes shining with enthusiasm. Inside the box was a small porcelain figure of a duck. Vanessa pulled it out of the box and showed Hat Kid the little key that was under it, as well as two wood wheels by its side. The queen turned the key a few times and set the toy down as Hat Kid watched, intrigued. The duck suddenly started moving, racing around the room! It went under the kid's bed and then around a few other toys scattered around the floor. The queen laughed as Hat Kid immediately jumped out of bed and started chasing the toy not just around the room, but around the whole manor, waking up everyone with her loud childish laughter.

Now, she was doing exactly the same, but not still in her pajamas. The brownish duck, with it's shiny yellow beak and shiny black eyes, raced down the corridors with the kid following right behind it. For some reason, some hallways were still pretty dark, even with all the light coming in from the windows. It's as if the light couldn't reflect on anything inside the manor, leaving the illuminated bits clear as day and, the rest of the manor, still pitch black. Like an immense dark void with only a few illuminated patches of floor scattered around, far away from eachother. If she wasn't careful enough, she could trip on things that were hidden in the dark, where she couldn't see them.

Red, purple and orange. The little duck turned the corner on one of the intersections and went to the left, away from the edge of the manor and into its inner corridors. There were no windows there. No light at all. Hat Kid felt hesitant, as if she knew she shouldn't even be there. But it was just a house, in fact, it was almost HER house now. She'd gotten so used to the peeled wallpaper and overall spooky vibe of the manor that it wasn't even scary anymore. And yet, she still felt like something was wrong. The hallway was completely dark, only the edge of the doorframe was visible. She couldn't tell where it led to. Her toy was going full speed into that corridor though. She couldn't lose her precious toy!

She took a deep breath, put on her determined expression and ran into the dark void. Her little feet still thumping loudly as she tried to listen for the squeaky sound of her toy as it echoed inside the corridor.

Red, purple, orange... and pitch black

-

Black.

She'd been running for a good few seconds now. Just straight forward. No looking back. That little toy of hers HAD to be somewhere around there. She could still hear it moving up ahead. She'd never really realised how fragile that thing probably was until now. I mean, it's porcelain! On wheels! A little crash or bump into some piece of furniture or even a wall might cause it to at least crack.

Hat Kid was finally starting to get legitimately worried. Where even was she? She'd sure never seen these parts of the manor. That was the only thing she still didn't feel familiar about the house: its layout. The manor played tricks on people, even on Vanessa, and she'd been living there for a very long time. Sure, it was big if seen from the outside, but once you'd step inside, you'd be bound to get lost if you didn't stay close to the windows. The inner corridors of the house were never blocked off. No warnings, no spooky tale about never going there, nothing. It was just common sense, something everybody around her knew, a rule that'd been taught by someone who not even time could remember by now. "Don't venture too deep into the manor. Don't go in the inner corridors of the house."

For some reason, she never really felt intrigued about it until now. Deep down, she knew she shouldn't go there. There didn't need to be any explanation or lesson to be taught. It was like one of those gut feelings; when, just by looking at something, you can tell it means danger. It makes you anxious. Not exactly scared, but unnerved, shaken. Like a primal fear of the darkness and the unknown. Suddenly, she snapped out of her train of thought. She thought she'd seen something. In the distance. What was that? Something was shining...

At the end of the dark void, she saw a light. There was another corridor there! An illuminated one! Oh thank goodness! She didn't knew how much longer she could've run for. She sprinted out of the corridor and back into the comforting light she left behind a few minutes ago.

Red, purple and orange.

The familiar sight immediately made her feel safe again. She was fine, everything was okay. She was still at home, nothing bad happened. Hat Kid leaned with her back against the wall behind her and took a deep breath. She then looked down and saw her toy next to her feet! It had probably reached the other end of the hallway and bumped into a wall. She crouched and picked it up.

After inspecting the toy for a few seconds, she could happily assure herself that it didn't had any cracks. She sighed in relief, turned the key on the toy's belly and dropped it. It creaked a little and speeded off down the new illuminated hallway. Hat Kid laughed and went back to her old self, chasing the toy again.

For a few minutes, it was like that whole incident was just a dream. The scary dark inner corridors of the manor seemed more like a nightmare than a memory now. It was just something that happened. She concluded that's just what it was: scary. The Subcon Forest was scary at first as well, but Hat Kid ended up getting used to it. The same applies to the manor that went from a haunted house to a home. But even those had somewhat of a "comforting" feeling to them. Subcon was dark, but Snatcher's "treehouse" was almost as cozy and bright as her own bedroom back in her ship. Vanessa's manor, despite being in bad shape, gained the feeling of an old home. It felt like a place you would go to spend the holidays or summer break. It had its charm and handful of funny secrets.

However, that corridor didn't share that house's same aesthetic. It felt odd, out-of-place. Maybe it was just too dark to even see anything at all, but just being there creeped her out. For some reason, she was fearing for her life, but there was nothing there that could hurt her. Well, not that she would be able to see it if it was there anyways. Now that she thought about it, what if there was something there? Something watching her? Something waiting? Something cruel, or even vile. Something...

Her train of thought was, yet again, interrupted by something outside of her own thoughts. She felt something. In the air. She could smell something. It was strong enough to pull her back into reality. The smell of something acid and bitter filled her tiny nose as she stopped on her tracks and covered her mouth and nostrils. What the peck WAS that?! It was so disgusting, so repugnant, enough to make her eyes tear up.

Red, purple and orange.

Her little toy slowed down and stopped right in front of her, just a few feet away. It stood still right in the middle of the long red carpet that covered the old wooden floor, illuminated by a window on the right side of the corridor. That stink was coming from somewhere near the toy, Hat Kid was sure of that. That same feeling came back. The primal fear of the darkness and the unknown. She had to get out of there. Something bad was going to happen. She just knew it. She had to get out of there now!

With the bit of bravery she had left, and with a free hand that wasn't covering her nose, she reached to grab her toy and run away as fast as possible. Then, out of the darkness, something quickly snatched her toy and pulled it into the black. Hat Kid jumped back. What... what was that?! What was happening? Was someone toying with her? Playing tricks on her? Was this Snatcher's doing? He sure loved to scare the kid, but she thought everyone was too busy doing their royal duties to play with her. She'd never seen her BFF using something like what she saw. What pulled her toy were a few shiny red ribbons. No, strings. Red strings, just quickly flowing and cutting through the air, fast enough for the kid's reflexes.

Hat Kid grasped her stomach. She felt like she was gonna throw up from the frightening atmosphere and the nauseous smell. Screw that toy. Vanessa would understand. She just needed to get out of there. She just needed to talk to someone who might know what was actually happening. The light from outside no longer seemed so inviting anymore. It was getting dark outside. The colors became cold and gained a certain blue-ish hue.

- Auntie! Auntie Ness! Help me! - the kid yelled as she lifted her head, hoping to make the sound somehow louder. And, as she did, she saw what was causing that smell.

Red, purple and orange

And yet...

she wished it was all black.

[miyaniacs]

I just read your post about an s/o who has muscle and is insecure about it. butttt could you do one with an s/o who works out but cant get results? and is insecure about it since they literally have a volleyball god boyfriend. ahaha thank you in advance if you write it! 🥺❤️❤️

Heyyy ✨❤️ i tied my best and did some research of what could be the reason why someone don't gain muscles - most of it is in Kuroos because he's the real nerd out of the three haha 

But keep in mind that this is nothing to be insecure about - yes it’s frustrating but you’re still an amazing person ❤️✊🏼 

HC S/O is insecure because they can’t gain muscles 

Bokuto 

Having a boyfriend who gets the bills paid by doing sports is cool yeah 

Dream coming true 

But also he’s ripped 

And you are healthy and active and working out …

But you don’t look like you are? 

You just don’t gain muscles 

So one day you decided enough is enough 

There has to be something you haven’t tried out yet so you decided to ask your baby owl 

“Is it because of something I said?? I’M SO SORRY IF I SAID ANYTHING THAT MADE YOU FEEL INSECURE -”

“No no Baby it’-”

“Baby you’re so beautiful you don’t need to change something about your body!“ 

“KOU!“

“…yes?“

“you did nothing wrong baby. I want to do this for myself. I want others to see how hard I work out… I want us to match:(”

“But baby… I don’t care if you don’t look as fit as I do.. I know that you can easily kick my ass“ He tilts his head to side

“Kou, I know you do - you’re just perfect - but I really want this…and I feel like nothing I do helps me gain muscles … “

“Okay .. mhhh … how about from know on we both stick to my meal plan? Obviously you don’t need to eat as much as I do but just so you get the right nutritions! All those supplements WONT help if you don’t have the right base already! OH and I can come to the gym with you next time and see if I see anything you could improve? I think you’re probably too afraid to increase the weight incase it would be too heavy and you make a fool out of yourself. SO when I’m with you - you don’t need to be afraid of this baby. AND you need to rest your muscles ok? AND the best way for this is getting enough sleep.“ He smiles and takes your hands in his 

“Okay kou..and I’d love too.“ You smile and kiss his cheek

“But …. You sure know that I love you with or without muscles yes? And that I don’t care about what others say?“ 

“Yes I know this baby- you’ll show it everyday“ you smile and he grabs your face, kissing you softly.

“But we still have our cheat days on the last Friday of the month“ he smiles brightly 

Just perfect boyfriend #1

Bonus: 

“baby… you really need to sleep more tho“ he pouts when he finds you awake at 2am 

“I know .. but I can’t fall asleep..“

“Ohhhh if that’s your problem we can include a small workout so you get tired from now on?“

“Kou… my muscles are already sore I wont go for a run in the evening.“

“baby.. I’m not talking about this kind of workout“ He smirks while taking off his shirt and walking over to you 

“I talk about the sort of workout that makes you really scream… the really hardcore one…“ he hovers over you and starts kissing your neck 

From now on you sleep like a baby 

Kuroo 

Sooo …. Kuroo is the equivalent to a healthy and fit person 

And you’re just .. basic? 

And yes.. you hear some people whisper why he’s with someone who’s not as fit as he is?

But you work out?? …. the comments still got into your head and you got insecure 

Sooo you started working out more,  not telling him tho because you wanted to do this by yourself 

But… whatever you’re doing your doing something wrong.. 

Alter 4 months there should be some muscles right? RIGHT?!

But there aren’t ???

So you become moody 

All those extra exercising made you tired and not seeing results just frustrated 

And Kuroo quickly noticed this and talks with you about it 

Since you know - he’s observant af and always worried about you and wants you to be happy all the time 

Because he’s perfect boyfriend #2

“Ok y/n. Tell me what’s wrong?“

“Oh nothing, I just don’t feel good“

“You know you can’t lie to me“ he sighs 

You sigh. he is right and you know it and you know that you need to put your pride aside and let him help 

“So .. technically… When someone wants to gain muscles but sh- HE doesn’t see any results.. what would you tell him to do?“

“Technically?“ He smirks 

“Technically!!!“

“Ok.. so technically- I would make sure that HE eats the right nutritions. Many still don’t eat enough because were told that eating more than what.. 1200 cals makes you fat - but to gain muscles you need to be increase your intake and stop being in a deficit. HE should make sure to increase his Protein intake and not just with Shakes“ He side eyes you “but also with actually EATING more proteins. Instead of relying on those you af first need to make sure you have all the needed multivitamins. AND if you use protein powder, use the right one - oh He should use the right one - Whey Protein has a broad spectrum of amino acids to help repairing and rebuild the muscles.“ 

“Ohhh okay… mhhh wow you really know much about this“ you mumble 

“Y/N?“

“Yes?“

“Also YOU need enough rest and sleep to let your muscles relax. You need the rest days to BUILD muscles. The hormone which is helping to grow muscles has its highest level when you sleep. And the more you stress yourself because you don’t gain them helps braking down the existing ones. Cortisol - a catabolic hormone - comes with stress and it can break down your muscles-”

“Kuroo I-” “not finished yet. I’ll come to the gym with you the next time and make sure that you lift the right amount of weight and make sure that you increase the weight. You won’t get muscles if you don’t increase it.“

“Thank you..“ You mumble 

“No need to - but come to me next time when somethings bothering you. I love you an I want you to love yourself, okay baby?“

“Okay..“ You smile and he kisses you cheek 

“Now - lets go shopping and fill the fridge with the right stuff.“

Oikawa 

Oikawa is fit

There is no one who can say he’s not 

And yes you enjoyed working out with him 

But there is like NO GAIN?? 

And it frustrated you that you’re  still normal and he’s ripped and getting more ripped everyday 

And yes you hear his fangirls making fun of you 

“Omg how can he be with someone who’s not fit at all?“ “I know right? Just a matter of time that he switched her for one of US when he sees us at the gym“

You’re sulky the rest of the day 

Not giving him the much needed attention he wants 

So he’s now clinging on you 

“BABYYYY what’s wrongggggg tellll meeeeeee“

“No it’s nothing love“

“But BABYYYYY I know there is something uppppp“ and he starts doing the worst thing ever 

He tickles you 

This bisch I swear 

After about 5 minutes you give in 

“Oka--OKAY:. I  -OMg STOP - I cant breathe“ You whine

“Noooo. Tell me then I stopppppp“ he smirks mischievously

“I want to gain muscles but I just don’t?“

He stops and looks at you dumbfounded 

“That’s it??“

„Yes..“

“baby.. first of all- your genetics aren’t made for getting muscles easily. Some of us have it harder then others and YOU can train as much as you want but you still will only get those lean muscles, because that’s just how your body is. But if you want me to help you I will gladly get your ass off the treadmill - too much cardio wont help you. And I will make you add the extra weight to kill your muscles so they get that they need to get stronger. AND YES. I - THE GREAT OIKAWA - WILL CARRY YOU IF YOUR LEGS HURT TOO MUCH!“

“Thank you baby, I’ll remember the carrying part“ you laugh but then your smile drops again 

“Whoaaa baby.. there’s still something bothering you?“

“You wont leave me for someone who looks fitter than me right?“

“OMFG WHAT?! I would never leave you because of something so stupid? I love you with my whole heart and I don’t care about this stupid things- Yes I care about it if it’s bothering you - but other than that those thought would never cross my mind“ and with said words he’s all over you kissing ever part of your skin that is exposed saying how much he loves you with every kiss. 

perfect boyfriend #3

[cake-writes]

Low

Pairing: Steve x Reader

Warnings: Angst, Drug and Alcohol Abuse, Mental Illness (Bipolar & Depression), Violence, 18+

Word Count: 3.5k

Requested by @josiewinters1999​: I was wondering if you could write a Steve x Reader where Steve helps Reader (his girlfriend) get over a drug addiction?

This request really hits close to home. To write this, I relied heavily on my own experiences with bipolar and drug addiction. If you - any of you - ever you need someone to talk to, my ask box and messages are always open!

Steve had always known you were big into gym supplements. You didn’t have serum or anything else enhanced running through your veins, just plain human blood, so you were always on the lookout for safe, healthy ways to boost your abilities. Even before the two of you got together, you introduced him to protein shakes, amino acids, creatine, the works – and you were very rarely ever found without a shaker bottle in hand, fresh from the gym.  

It certainly helped you quite a lot to supplement your exercise. You could bench press and deadlift a lot of weight for your small stature, and your squats were in a league of their own. You were strong. Not as strong as him, of course, but for a regular person, you could definitely pack a wallop.

Even though your body was strong, your mind wasn’t. He knew that too, and he didn’t pry. Steve certainly wasn’t without his demons, and he reminded you every now and then that he’d be happy to talk if you ever wanted to. You’d been together for a little over a year, now, and he’d opened up quite a bit about his own past – but you hadn’t. Not about the things that plagued you. Not yet. It would take time, and he knew that. He understood.  

He probably should have paid more mind than he did to the pills you started to take. Over the last few months, your bedside drawer slowly became full of them. Some were for medical reasons, and the rest were vitamins or supplements – or so you claimed.

In some regards, he knew a fair bit about your meds. The little white pill was your birth control. The little blue one was an antidepressant. The capsule was lithium. All for medical reasons.

The others weren’t.

The bigger white pill was oxycodone. The yellow one was valium.

Those weren’t vitamins at all. You lied to him about them, and he was oblivious. He certainly didn’t think to research them, because he trusted you. Vitamins and supplements were nothing out of the ordinary.

What Steve didn’t know was that you were spiralling.

You’d been prescribed the oxy a few weeks back to alleviate the pain from a couple of broken bones in your wrist. You’d mostly healed up by now, but due to your line of work, the doctor had given you a backup supply along with a warning not to abuse them – just in case the pain very likely flared up in your wrist.

And it did.

And you did.

You abused them. Not only did they make you feel good, like everything would be alright, but they also gave you extra energy and made you chatty and sociable. You liked to pop one or two before missions where a lot of teamwork would be involved. Sometimes you’d take them before Tony’s insufferable parties, too, and combine them with alcohol for extra effect. That was always fun.

The valium, on the other hand, was originally meant to manage your anxiety, carefully prescribed by a psychiatrist who monitored your condition. Flare-ups didn’t happen often, mostly just when you made a stupid mistake on a mission, and afterwards you’d stew over it for hours like a broken record, over and over and over. You’d ruminate. The valium took the edge off and distracted you from your thoughts. It, too, made you feel good.

Needless to say, as of late you weren’t in a very good headspace. The fact that you were manic depressive was bad enough. It was manageable, but that kind of diagnosis didn’t just go away, even if you usually did handle it well enough with a delicate combination of medication and therapy.

Work stress was what triggered your downward spiral. The longer you were an Avenger, the more it took its toll on you and, eventually, your mood started to plummet despite your medication. You went low.

Truth be told, you’d been low for weeks. The fact that you’d started to pop pills was a good indication, but you refused to acknowledge that something was wrong.

Steve always made sure you knew that you could talk to him if you ever needed to, but you didn’t about the more serious stuff. For basic things, you did – how your wrist was healing up, how you were feeling today, if you’d achieved one of your top three things for the day like he gently encouraged you to do. They were little questions that showed he cared, and it meant the world to you that he asked them – just as much as when he told you I love you outright.

You knew how much it would hurt him to know that you were feeling depressed, so you didn’t share that with him. He already had so much on his shoulders, and you didn’t want to be a burden. He knew all about your highs and your lows and he did what he could to help you through them – but there wasn’t much he could do and it only made you feel guilty. You knew how helpless he felt on the days you couldn’t even get yourself out of bed, and you didn’t want him to think anything was wrong.

So, instead, you popped pills – pills that made the world seem bright again, if only for a few short hours.

One small dose of valium slowly turned to three as your tolerance increased. It made you feel so incredibly relaxed that you stared into space sometimes, mind blissfully blank. Sometimes it knocked you out, too; made you sleep like the dead. Steve had never known you to be a heavy sleeper, but as of late, you had been. He figured you’d just been having a rough couple of weeks because your body was still healing. He was oblivious.

In the Quinjet before a particularly bothersome mission, you needed the extra energy and ego boost. This mission would require a fair amount of teamwork and you were in no mood for it. Sam sat to your left while the two of you prepped your gear, and Steve was across the aisle from you, his shield in the vacant seat beside him. Clint was piloting. The rest of the team was already on site, ready to raid.

After your gear was all ready and adjusted, Sam just happened to glance over and catch you pull a little orange pill bottle from your pocket. At first, he assumed it was another vitamin or supplement or some stupid new thing you were into, until he caught a glimpse of the label – oxycodone.

You popped two of the tablets into your mouth, and dry swallowed them with ease.

Well, that wasn���t normal.

As you shoved the bottle back into your duffel bag, you caught him eyeing you and asked blankly, “What?”

“Those your, uh,” he chose his words carefully to test the waters, “new supps?”

You beamed at him. “Aw, Sammy, you know me so well.”

Sam had been a counsellor at the VA for a number of years. He knew what drug addiction looked like. Of course he was the first person to catch on to yours. The fact that you’d blatantly lied about it was the first sign – lied and deflected. And then, later on during the mission, when your words slurred just a little over comms, that was the second one.

He was going to have a very difficult conversation with you, and he wasn’t looking forward to it. What’s worse was that he needed to keep it from Steve out of respect for you. Sam was never one for secrets, but for now, he’d keep yours. If the conversation went south like he highly suspected it would, then he’d would have no choice but to tell him. Hopefully that wouldn’t happen and you’d come to your senses, but he already knew you wouldn’t.

In the morning, Sam made you breakfast. That wasn’t too unusual, because he made everyone breakfast every now and then. He liked to cook, and his pancakes were to die for. Knowing he was making them this morning put a tiny bit of light into your otherwise bleak outlook on life as of late.

It was just the two of you in the kitchen so early in the morning. Steve had accidentally woken you up as he was getting ready for his morning jog, and you hadn’t been able to get back to sleep. Sam had strangely chosen to forego his, but he did that every now and then so you didn’t think anything of it.

As expected, the conversation went poorly.

“Those weren’t vitamins yesterday,” Sam commented casually, “were they?”

You’d just started bringing your loaded fork up to your mouth, but you stilled. The pause was extremely brief, just long enough to make it obvious that he wasn’t wrong. Then you rolled your eyes and shoved the bite of pancakes into your mouth.

“Sure they were,” you told him, muffled by pancakes. “Gotta get my B-12’s, you know.”

You lied about it so easily, like you’d done it a hundred times before. Sam knew what oxycodone looked like, and he could only imagine what other things you were on if you were popping pills so easily before a mission – and two of them, no less.

Sam said your name firmly, almost in reprimand and immediately, your temper flared.  You purposely dropped your fork down onto the plate with a loud clink and shot him a nasty glare.

“It’s oxy,” he responded. “You shouldn’t be taking it on a mission. You know that.”

“It’s a vitamin,” you hissed. “Ask Steve. He knows.”

Sam crossed his arms over his chest. “You lie to him too?”

At that, you loudly shoved your chair back from the kitchen counter and got to your feet. “I’m not gonna put up with your bullshit, Wilson. You wanna counsel someone, go back to the VA.”

“This isn’t about me.” His voice was patient and kind, not accusatory. “You’ve got a problem.”

“No, you’re the one with the problem,” you spat at him. “Get off my ass.”

Projection. He’d expected as much.

“I can get you in contact with someone. She’s really good—”

You interrupted him angrily, “Go to hell, Sam.”  

And then, when you stormed out of the room, he let you go. He knew it was a hard pill to swallow – literally – to be told something like this, and he’d dealt with it hundreds of times by this point. Everyone reacted differently. Some people came to terms with it and tried to do better, while others sank even further into addiction. He hoped you’d be the former, not the latter.

Just in case, though, he sent Steve a quick text.

Keep an eye on her for the next couple of days, yeah? She’s low.

When you got back upstairs to your shared room with Steve, you popped another couple pills – valium this time – and cried into your pillow.

After he received Sam’s text, Steve returned from his jog sooner than he’d planned. He found you bundled up in the sheets, staring into space with streaks of tears and mascara drying on your cheeks. You didn’t even notice he was there, or if you did, you didn’t acknowledge him. You just kept staring blankly at the wall.

His heart broke at the sight.

“Oh, sweetheart—”

Steve gathered you into his arms so easily and held you close, bringing your head against his chest as the two of you lay in bed together. Your messy makeup stained his white t-shirt, but he didn’t care and neither did you. It was a small comfort, the way he threaded his fingers through your hair as he whispered sweet things to you, reassurances he always told you when you were low. “It’s okay. It’ll be okay. I love you.”

You didn’t respond, or maybe you couldn’t. You loved him, but in this moment you were numb. You fell asleep to the sound of his voice, surrounded by the warmth and love that only Steve – your sweet, caring Steve – could provide.

You were low. Almost at rock bottom, as a matter of fact, but not quite.

Rock bottom hit during your next mission, two days later.

You took a couple shots of alcohol before the mission to settle the pre-mission jitters, and then you popped three oxy on the Quinjet, not because you needed them but as an act of rebellion. Sam wasn’t there this time to get on your case, and for that, you were thankful. Instead, you were paired up with Bucky and Natasha. You didn’t need the drugs for this mission because you got along with the two of them, but you took them anyway as a nice fuck you.

That fuck you almost got you and your teammates killed.

It was meant to be a covert mission – pop in and out unseen, grab some intel, but you were, to put it bluntly, entirely too fucked up to be in the field. You couldn’t sneak around when you were so clumsy and uncoordinated. While you’d combined alcohol with oxy before, you’d never done it with three and you didn’t realize to what extent it would fuck you up.

Needless to say, your presence was quickly detected.

The three of you were outnumbered.

“What the hell’s wrong with you?” Natasha bit out, shoving you behind the wall right before a flood of bullets ricocheted off of it. You just slid down it and fell on your ass, high as hell, not to mention the fact that your vision was blurry and you were seeing double. You didn’t care that you’d nearly been shot.

Maybe it would have been a blessing.

You didn’t even realize that you already had been shot until Bucky was suddenly there, crouching down in front of you, his lips pressed together in a thin line. You weren’t even sure where he came from, but he started applying firm pressure to your shoulder with one hand, patting your cheek with the other. It was the only way he could capture your attention long enough to assess you – and what he found was that you were in a stupor.

He knew it wasn’t shock settling in, because he could smell the alcohol on your breath for one, and for two, all you did was smile up at him like an idiot. You didn’t feel a thing. You probably didn’t even know where the hell you were.

He wasn’t wrong.

Blood seeped through his fingers as he tore open a pack of gauze with his teeth, and then he swore under his breath, packing the wound with practiced finesse. He was no medic, nor was he perfect at it, but he knew enough.

Your blood streamed freely down the back of his hand, the bright colour a stark contrast to his pale skin and the only thought on your mind was that it was a very pretty red.

Then Bucky and Natasha were saying things to each other, but you couldn’t really focus on it with the blood loss and the noise from the gunshots – particularly Natasha’s when she returned fire as Bucky hoisted you up onto his back.

How the three of you made it out, you couldn’t be sure. You didn’t pass out, but you weren’t entirely awake for it, either.

That was the shock settling in.

You didn’t stay conscious for long.

It was all a blur until the next day, when you finally woke to Steve sitting at your bedside with a book. He hadn’t managed to get very far into it. One of his large, warm hands lay atop yours, but the only thing you could focus on was the sharp, awful pain in your shoulder. That was when the memories – what little of them remained – came flooding back.

You’d been shot.

“I thought I was supposed to get morphine,” you joked, wincing from both the pain and at how raspy your voice sounded.

Steve’s eyes snapped up from his novel to your face, and on it you saw mostly relief – but it was coupled with an emotion you couldn’t quite grasp. Not yet.

“They couldn’t give you any,” he told you, squeezing your hand gently but it did nothing to soften the blow of his next words. “You had too much… stuff in your system.”

Oh.

Oh.

“How are you feeling?” he asked, hesitant and awkward and it only put you on the defensive because, in that moment, you realized that he knew.

“What do you think?” you snapped at him, pulling your hand from his grasp. That was a mistake, because it was on the same side as your wound and searing pain rushed through you at the action, so much that you were forced to bite down on your lower lip to keep from screaming. Every single muscle in your body was tense, ready to fight or to run, to flee from the conversation you knew you were going to have.

You refused to look at him again. You were ashamed. You’d fucked up.

You’d fucked up bad.

“Bucky and Nat are fine,” he reassured you. “They want to see you.”

Hot tears pricked at the corners of your eyes and you chewed at your lower lip, slowly shaking your head. “No. I don’t want them to see me like this.”

Like a junkie. That was what you’d become.

He knew what you meant. They’d seen you in a hospital bed before, as had Steve.

“Bucky was really worried, you know?” Steve’s attempt to lighten the mood fell flat. “Said he’d never seen so much blood coming from such a small—”

“Can we just get this over with?” you interrupted, finally meeting his eyes again. The tears hadn’t yet spilled over, but when you saw the look on his face, you knew they were close. “Rip off the band-aid, Steve. Come on.”  

Steve slowly exhaled, running a hand through his hair. He wasn’t planning on discussing this right now with you, because you’d literally just woken up, you were in pain, upset and the last thing he wanted to do was upset you further. It wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have right now, and truth be told, it made him nervous.

Even still, he ripped off the band-aid just like you asked him to.

“They ran a tox screen,” he told you, point-blank. “Sam’s suggestion. He said the two of you had a conversation the other day, and the mission reports…”

You grimaced. “What did they say?”

“You know what they said.”

Natasha might have covered for you before, for other, smaller things, but for this she wouldn’t – and Bucky wouldn’t, either. They couldn’t rely on you to have their backs, not like this. If you were in no condition to be in the field, then they would have had no choice but to report it. You’d nearly gotten them killed as it was, and you were lucky that it was only you who’d been shot.

You supposed you deserved it. That thought made you look down at your lap in shame, and you fidgeted anxiously with the thin, scratchy blanket on your uninjured side.

“It’s okay,” Steve told you in his familiar way, gently wrapping his fingers around your small hand again. You didn’t pull away this time, but you didn’t look up at him, either, because the dam finally broke. Tears streamed down your face for what felt like the umpteenth time in the last few weeks.

Steve was always too kind, never judgmental, but right now all you wanted was for him to yell at you. You didn’t want his kindness, not right now. You’d nearly gotten your teammates killed and here he was he was telling you that it was okay.

“It’s not, Steve.” Your voice was weak and pathetic, and it broke when you spoke again, “I’m not.”

That was when the bed dipped, and then Steve gathered you in his arms so easily, just like he always did – except this time, he was a lot more careful with you. He was too gentle, like you were going to shatter to pieces if he wasn’t.

“I know,” he whispered. “I love you.”

He said those three little words so often to you – a couple times a day, at least – but even now you never really understood how he could love someone like you. You were broken, and at your core you had far too many troubles for him to handle, but he tried. He always tried.

Even if he didn’t know what to do to help you, and even if there was nothing he could do, he still tried.

Maybe you’d try, too. Maybe you’d finally talk to him about your troubles.

“I’m sorry,” you managed in between sobs, burying your face into his chest. The words just kept coming, spilling out of your mouth like verbal vomit and it only made you hate yourself more. “I’m sorry. I love you so much, Steve, please don’t leave me—”

“I won’t,” he reassured you, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. “We’re in this together. It’ll be okay.”

He’d told you that so many times over the past year that you’d been with him, but this was the first time you ever believed him.

It would be okay.

(If you like my work, please consider donating to my Patreon or my Ko-Fi!)

[candlesquare7]

What Makes Sarms So Great?

Are Collagen Supplements Worth The Hype?

Content

The Easy Formula To Reduce Your Diet Regimens Carbon Footprint.

Survival Of Eggshell Peptides Over Countless Years In Africa Is Because Of Mineral Binding.

Stack Ostarine.

Recombinant Overlapping Peptide.

Turned on ghrelin receptors stimulates development hormone release from the brain. The current item from The Warrior Job is the development hormonal agent secretagogue MK-677. Please note that both our catalog go through item availability. CHEMICAL COMPOSITION (small mass web content in %) - Numbers in bold type licensed, figures in tiny italic type just approximate. I got osterine off the web site and did not recieve a confirmation of order or monitoring number, i emailed then as well as have actually had no reaction possibly simply busy.

After 2 weeks of consumption, I already had considerably much better memory and also concentration. However I have an inflammation on the neck which is why I had weak point in one hand and tingling so I quit utilizing it and also yet I remained healthy and balanced. In both experiments, BW increased substantially after OVX, that is a recognized action to estrogen starvation in rats and also can be described by improved food consumption and also various other metabolic changes in these rats. None of the treatments with the SARMs modified the BW and also food consumption, and that is in line with previous reports. On the other hand, Kearbey, Gao observed a greater BW in OVX rats after administration of the SARM S-4 than in OVX rats. It is feasible that the modifications in BW depend on the details SARM being researched.

It is much less active in "androgenic" tissues such as the prostate or sex organs. The biggest disadvantage with LGD is that it created moderate to strong HPTA suppression for both total and complimentary testosterone. Complete testosterone reduced by just over 50% contrasted to placebo. But hormonal agent degrees did return to normal within 56 days after stopping without any PCT.

The Basic Formula To Reduce Your Diet Regimens Carbon Impact.

SARM preparations are recommended for people with high training experience. Keep in mind that there are no magic pills that will do every little thing for you. Without a strong workout, it will not work, and the preparations can only quicken the effects. Ostarine is the SARM that is being established for the avoidance and also therapy of muscle losing.

Although Ostarine is taken by mouth, as it is not methylated it is not as liver poisonous as other oral steroids/prohormones. As a result it can be competed longer than the typical 4 week period with the aforementioned compounds. Ostarine has also shown noticeable nutrient partioining effects among individuals, one more reason it can be of great aid when reducing.

Survival Of Eggshell Peptides Over Countless Years In Africa Is Because Of Mineral Binding.

Nevertheless Austria bpc157 how does it work for reductions from such doses is higher and also customers would have to look into a PCT procedure after going through such a cycle. Every person is various, so does their health problem, resistance, as well as fitness objective.

Men that had previously been incapable to accomplish an buy nolvadex study chemical erection and also guys with a low libido additionally revealed significant improvement. An additional vital result for athletes is that they raise sports efficiency and vascularity. Athletes have constantly been looking for an edge to contend, yet after steroids were outlawed by the World Anti-Doping Company, they started looking for a brand-new edge. There is, however, some initial research study to suggest that SARMs can be utilized as a means to aid cancer people fight muscle-wasting, but besides this, they're not FDA accepted. ... and also while several claim that the Ostarine adverse effects are extremely minimal, not much long-term research has been done to verify this point.

Stack Ostarine.

Some reductions might be present at doses of 25mg+ run for longer than 4 weeks, nevertheless a rigid PCT of prescription SERMs like Nolva or Clomid is not essential. If however you are definitely worried regarding minor rises in Estrogen, you can constantly go with low doses of OTC AI's such as 6bromo or extremely really low doses of prescription AI's like adex or aromasin. As Ostarine has a half life of around 24 hours, each of these doeses just has to be taken by mouth once a day, therefore its also provides an extremely convientinet supplements consumption. Doses of 12.5 mg per day is advise for such functions and also enhancement in joint activity that can be seen after simply 6-8 days.

Developed by Dr AJ Sturnham this rich moisturiser contains a proprietary peptide mix which helps improve collagen production for stronger, much more flexible skin.

If the peptide stays Insoluble, take a look at Its amino acid composition prior to proceeding additionally.

The last focus of acetic acid or ammonia/ammonium bicarbonate allowed will certainly be figured out by the use to which the peptide is to be ultimately put.

It is originated from the amino acid series og human Stac2 (deposits) as well as when delivered to the cytoplasm of guinea pig ventricular myocytes lengthens the heart action capacity and recapitulates longQT disorder.

What percentage of amino acids are hydrophobic and also the amount of deposits are positively charged or negatively billed?

This calming moisturiser has 2% royal epigen, a peptide healthy protein located in royal jelly which is verified to increase the rate of cell turn over for noticeably smoother and also extra also skin in simply 28 days.

We utilize cookies to improve your experience, show you items you might like as well as conserve your cart. Dalton reveals that SARMs are "typically well-tolerated" in scientific tests, with "lower prostatic effects in men and virilising impacts in ladies". " Anabolic steroids are known for a whole host of unpleasant negative effects." Men's Health joins numerous associate advertising programs, which implies we might earn money commissions on editorially picked items acquired with our web links to seller websites. For that reason, prior to taking SARMs you ought to believe meticulously about it. Nevertheless, point of views on mindful and also controlled dose, aimed at accomplishing the preferred effects as well as limiting the maximum feasible side effects are preferred.

Recombinant Overlapping Peptide.

It is currently undertaking professional tests as well as may become the clinical prescription for avoidance of cachexia, atrophy, as well as sarcopenia and for Hormonal agent or Testoserone Substitute Treatment. i dropped extra power and also emphasis in the exercise, I assume i star to get even more muscular tissue. This item is never meant to identify, treat or heal any type of medical condition and are not to be taken into consideration a medicine. High dental biovailabilty without considerable damage to your liver as with dental steroids/prohormones.

The tissue-specific expression of 5α-reductase may supply a straightforward explanation for this puzzle. Keep up to day on the most recent item launches, special offers & news by registering for our newsletter. The most effective, I tried if for a really short time and improved both the physical performance as well as psychological.

As a result of this SARMs may be very effective for muscle wasting problems such as weakening of bones, AIDS as well as cancer cells associated wasting. Some may also become a reliable oral man contraceptive treatment. A receptor modulator is a substance that can obstruct or promote the nuclear hormonal agent receptor under different conditions. If it can effectively boost a receptor in a cells precisely, it may have the ability to simulate the advantageous results within that singular cells as well as minimise the undesirable results of hormones within the other cells. In one of the most fundamental terms, they can assist construct muscle and reduce negative effects by concentrating on only the targeted receptors.

In the GM, a significantly higher task of CS was observed in the OVX+LG 0.4 treatment team than in the OVX group. The task of other muscular tissue enzymes in the GM did not differ amongst the treatment groups.

The decrease in metabolic price and hormonal agent degrees with the absence of calories is an ideal catabolic enviroment for loss of muscle tissue. Individuals have as high as 36mg [just suggested for those who evaluate in at 210lbs +] for periods as long as 8 weeks.

Huperzine-A is a cognitive booster that prevents an enzyme that breaks down the discovering natural chemical, acetylcholine; and so as a result of this, a relative boost happens. Professional athletes are at times curious about alpha-GPC because of its capability to improve growth hormone production and to likewise enhance power result. Ibutamoren boosts levels, by simulating the action of the hormonal agent ghrelin, and also binding to one of the ghrelin receptors in the mind ).

What should you not mix with hyaluronic acid?

Mix: Retinol and hyaluronic acid “Retinol is known to cause irritation to the skin, especially when a proper moisturizing regimen is not put in place,” warns Dr.

Yes, I want to get updates concerning items & services, promos, special deals, information & events from Killer Nourishment. The maximum variety of items that can be contrasted is 3, if you desire to compare this product instead of one more you have selected please deselect the product as well as change it with the product you wish to compare.

I requested for a refund and once again no feedback once more possibly hectic with other emails intend to hear from them ASAP. Was emailed to state order delayed and will certainly be sent out on Thursday, nevertheless it's now Tuesday as well as still no product or monitoring number. I'll update on the development once it shows up to tell if it is legitimate. I have actually gotten Ostarine nearly two weeks earlier now as well as I'm still yet to get a tracking number or a reply to one of the two emails I have sent them. Discerning Androgen Receptor Modulators are an unique course of AR ligands that have tissue-selective pharmacological activities. With the fast development in SARM exploration as well as enhancing need for mechanism-based medicine layout, a growing number of research efforts have been dedicated to the devices of activity of the observed tissue selectivity of SARMs. There is enhancing excitement in adapting the molecular systems of activity from SERM research study to the SARM area; nevertheless, is the SARM story actually so made complex?

New Tech Created to Aid COVID-19 Vaccine Immunity Monitoring - Lab Manager Magazine

New Tech Created to Aid COVID-19 Vaccine Immunity Monitoring.

Posted: Tue, 05 Jan 2021 15:53:01 GMT [source]

For this reason if you are intending to go with SARM after that choose the best after correct assessment of its security as well as strength. Reading reviews in dependable online forum, taking suggestion from great wishers and undergoing the item information might be tremendously valuable. Even you can get in touch with wellness expert as well as get appropriate information concerning correct dose, influence of overdosage, alerting indications, and so on to ensure that you can act without delay in instance of any type of medical emergency situation. Nowadays clients can easily buy the best SARM from reliable online shop within matter of seconds. A lot of the renowned platform constantly supplies vast array of premium SARMs of various types, rate, producer and also taste to ensure that every client can meet their dreams off having special and outstanding body. It is unclear whether Nexium is the actual cause of an buy nolvadex for study objectives enhanced threat of fracture.

In the LM, the therapy with LG revealed dramatically higher LDH task in the OVX+LG 0.4 group than in the Non-OVX and the OVX+LG 4 groups. In more detail , there were no differences among the therapy groups in all 3 enzymes studied. The therapy with LG or OVX did not transform the lotion CK levels. In the LM, the area as well as the corresponding size of STO/FTO and FTG fibers were considerably bigger in the OVX+LG 4 team compared with the Non-OVX team. In the SM, a considerably larger location and also corresponding diameter of STO/FTO fibers were observed in the OVX and OVX+LG 0.4 teams than in the Non-OVX team.

[rainbow-sides]

A Hand to Hold: Chapter Seven

Summary: Patton befriends an isolated boy at his high school and soon develops feelings for him that aren’t just friendship. Navigating a relationship of any kind with Logan Barry isn’t easy, but it sure is worth it!

Pairings: romantic Logicality, possible background Prinxiety but I haven’t decided yet

Word Count: 1,739

Warnings: talk about bullying, ableism from a parent, very brief mention of Deceit, mentions of abusive therapy (implied ABA), food mention, mild spoilers for Doctor Who, anxiety, school stress,

Notes: ATTENTION I am no longer using a taglist. Instead, please follow and click notifications for the blog @rainbow-sides-fics. I’ll be reblogging all of my old fics there as well as any new ones I’ll be posting. Alternatively, A Hand to Hold is now available on AO3. Love you guys! <3 ~Martin

Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six

___________________________________

“GCAT PUPY PUPY,” Virgil chanted, his palms pressed to his temples. “Guanine and adenine are purines, cytosine and thymine are pyrimidines. Right?”

Logan nodded. “Correct. Well remembered.”

“Thank God for mnemonics.” Virgil popped a chip into his mouth. “Okay. Okay. What else is on the study guide?”

“It says to understand 5’ and 3’ directionality, decoding amino acid sequencing, and be able to explain the process of DNA replication as well as translation from DNA to proteins,” Logan said, summarizing the study guide for what was probably the fourth or fifth time. Although he knew that Virgil obviously knew the material, he got anxious during tests. He had asked Logan to help study with him so he felt more prepared.

“I feel like I know all of that, but there's got to be a catch, right? I'm gonna fail. I'm gonna fail.” He started to breathe too quickly.

Chex, who had been resting on the floor next to Virgil's chair, sat up. She nudged Virgil's leg with her nose and let out a soft whine.

Virgil buried his hand in the fur on the back of the dog's neck and took a deep breath. “No, I'm probably not going to fail. I've never failed a test in this class before, and I've been doing all the work.”

“I don't believe that you will fail,” Logan agreed. He twisted the ring on his finger, not sure what else to say. 

He wanted to help Virgil, but anxiety was complicated and Logan wasn't great at complicated emotions. Logan figured it was probably best to leave that to Patton. And Chex, of course. The sweet black lab was so in tune with Virgil's anxiety that she could tell even before he started to have an attack and would remind him to redirect his energy into more productive avenues.

“Would you like to keep studying?” asked Logan. “I have vocabulary cards for the whole unit, and there is always a vocabulary section on the test.”

Virgil nodded. “Sure, vocab practice sounds good. Hey, um, thanks again for coming over to study with me. It's nice to have a friend in that class now, I'm less stressed about it.”

Logan thought that Virgil still seemed very stressed. He didn't voice that opinion. “Codon,” he said, holding up the first vocabulary card.

“Uhh, uh, it's any series of three nitrogen bases that code for a specific amino acid, right?”

“Correct. Peptide bond.”

Virgil looked up at the ceiling. “It's...uh, well, peptide is referring to proteins, so...bonds between proteins?”

“Bonds between amino acids,” Logan corrected. “Okasaki fragments.”

“Oh shit,” Virgil muttered. “Um, something about the leading strand?”

“Lagging strand. Okazaki fragments are the stretches of DNA that are copied piece by piece on the lagging strand,” said Logan. He spun the ring on his finger again. He hoped that Virgil wouldn't get worried that he wasn't getting all of the vocabulary right.

“Right! I remember now.”

“Operon.”

“Oh, hey, I know this one. A group of genes that are functionally related,” Virgil said.

“Correct. Intron.”

They kept going until all of the vocabulary cards had been discussed. Logan put aside the ones that Virgil had struggled on so he could keep looking at them later.

“Seriously, thank you so much for coming and helping me out,” Virgil said. “I feel much better about the test on Thursday.”

Logan flicked his hand up near the side of his face. “You're welcome,” he said.

“I don't think I'm going to be able to cram much more into my brain right now, I need a break. Hey, how's the Doctor Who marathon with Patton going?” Virgil wondered.

With a slight bounce in his seat, Logan replied, “We watched Boom Town this weekend! On Wednesday afternoon, he is coming to my house to watch Bad Wolf and The Parting of Ways!”

Virgil leaned forward. “Oh, man, you're already almost to Nine's regeneration? Does Patton know it's coming?”

“Yes, and he says that he will miss Eccleston, but that he's seen David Tennant in other things and is looking forward to meeting Ten,” Logan said happily. He hummed to himself for a second before adding, “I am looking forward to reaching Ten's episodes, he is my favorite modern Doctor.”

“I gotta say, I like Capaldi. He's grumpier. More my style. Though Tennant at the end of his run is cool, he gets dark and edgy.” Virgil grinned. “The new season with Jodie Whittaker was freaking fantastic, too.”

“Much agreed,” Logan said. “I appreciate having a larger group of companions again, and the diversity has improved recently.”

Virgil scratched Chex behind the ears. “Yeah, big team TARDIS's are fun. One of my favorites was at the end of Journey's End was when they were all flying the TARDIS like she's supposed to be flown.”

Logan nodded. “May I ask you a question?” he said suddenly.

“Yeah, course.”

“What does it feel like to you when you are excited about something? Such as when you are talking about or watching Doctor Who, or listening to the music you like?” Logan asked.

There was a long pause as Virgil thought about that. “It makes me happy, I guess.”

“How does it physically feel?” Logan pressed.

“Oh, jeez, I'm not sure. It almost makes me feel peaceful? Like, um, listening to my music makes my mind slow down for just a little while. My body feels more relaxed afterwards. Same with watching something I like. It's a comfort, almost.” Virgil tapped his fingers against the table. “This is a tough question, dude.”

Logan leaned back in his chair. “I apologize.”

“No, it's okay. Really, I just need to think for a minute. Um...it feels warm in my chest sometimes. I guess that's about it. Well, starting a new episode almost feels like anxiety for me. But then again, most emotions turn into anxiety for me. That's just how anxiety works,” Virgil said. Then he asked, “What does it feel like for you?”

Putting his hands on his chest, Logan says, “I'm not sure. I have alexithymia, so I have a difficult time labeling emotions. I can sometimes describe it in physical sensations, though. And my excitement about my special interests feels like my heart and my lungs and my stomach are all on fire, if being on fire felt good and didn't hurt.”

“Sounds intense.”

“It is.” Logan looked down as Chex put her head against his leg. Her sweet brown eyes blinked up at him, and a soft warmth spread through his chest. “Hello,” he said. “Hello, Chex. Your ears are very soft.” He stroked her head.

“She wants to make sure that you're okay,” Virgil said. “She...she can hear changes in people's voices and checks up on them, even if it isn't me.”

“I'm alright. I don't have excellent volume control, or tone control. I never know what I sound like, exactly.” He couldn't tear his eyes away from the beautiful dog. “But I suppose that talking about my experiences with emotion do cause me some distress, which could have emerged in my voice without my noticing.”

Virgil stood up and walked over to the living room. “Want to come sit over here, Lo?” he offered.

“Um, alright.” Logan went over to join him. Chex followed him, and all three of them sat down on the ground. “Why?”

“Why does talking about your emotions distress you?” Virgil asked.

Logan froze up. “Because they are difficult,” he said slowly. “And I do not understand them. I do not like talking to people about things I do not understand.”

“Are you worried that someone might tell you that your emotions are wrong?”

A confused, bad feeling swirled around inside him. Chex laid her head and front paws in his lap, and he felt calmer. “Perhaps, but I'm not sure that I understand the question,” Logan admitted, running his hands down the dog's fur. It was almost as soothing as a full-body stim, and the pressure of her weight against his legs added to that effect.

“I mean, do you think that someone will come along and tell you that the way you are labeling your emotions is wrong? That the words you use to describe your experiences are incorrect?” Virgil tried to clarify.

“Yes, that is what happens.” It had happened many times before. The way he tried to describe what he was feeling to his mother or to his therapists had often been misinterpreted or simply ignored because it didn't make sense. Logan had learned to keep quiet about what he was feeling.

“But you're talking to me about it, even though it...scares you?” Virgil checked. “Is that right?”

Logan shifted. “Yes.”

Virgil smiled. “I think that means you trust me. Thank you.”

“I do trust you,” Logan said. “And I have learned that you and Patton and Roman are worthy of my trust. You've never once tried to make me act normally, or made fun of me.”

“It sucks that the bar is so low,” sighed Virgil.

Logan kept petting Chex. “I don't know that that means, exactly, in this context.”

“Um, it means that I don't think that somebody not laughing at you or trying to change you into something you're not should be the bar, the threshold or limit, for whether or not you can trust them. I mean...I guess what I really mean is that it sucks that you don't get that from everyone. In a perfect world, nobody would make fun of anyone or try to change them,” Virgil explained.

“But we do not live in a perfect world,” Logan reminded him.

“Yeah. Yeah, I know. I know that very well.”

Chex whined softly and raised her head to look at Virgil. Her tail thumped a few times against the floor, and he scooted closer to put his hand on her back. He closed his eyes. Logan didn't say anything. They sat there petting Chex in silence for a while, and it was a soothing silence. Logan felt much calmer and less bad by the time his mother arrived to pick him up and take him home. 

He sat in the living room and watched Ian flutter around his plants as the afternoon trailed on. His mother chatted to him as she cleaned and prepared dinner, but he wasn't listening. He was off in his own head, trying to imagine a perfect world.

___________________________________

Sorry for the long wait and the fairly short chapter! I’m working on the next one. But also I’m going back to work next week, and school starts a couple weeks after that, so who knows when I’m going to have time to write? Ah, well. I’ll do what I can.

And hey, check out Time and Time’s Turning if you like my writing! It’s a fairy AU with eventual Royality and Analogical. Also, it has art!!!!! <3 ~Martin

[transmortifried]

so i’m playing mass effect 3 for the first time for the second time (made some bad choices on my first run, starting over) and i’ve got some hot takes i want to raise about the “story and mission-based companion-focused rpg” genre

1. companion quests make any game with companions better by their inclusion. not all companion quests are good obviously, but it’s definitely something i miss in 3 that i loved in 2, where it was a prominent and vital part of the game. (there’s like 3 or 4 missions total in 2 that aren’t recruiting a new party member or solving their deep-rooted personal problems.)

2. how games let you romance your companions has problems.

2a. for one, hey devs i don’t give a SHIT if you think nobody wants to romance the awful crab alien or the robot detective, i GUARANTEE that your players do. (although i would personally hate a javik romance b/c he’s awful and terrible, the bit where you bang him in the citadel DLC is fucking HILARIOUS). also bioware, where’s the krogan romance options? if we can figure out how to bang the cute quarian without killing her with our terribly filthy human germs and incompatible amino acids, we can figure out how to bang a krogan without dying

2b. no het-only romance options pls. i’m okay with same-gender-exclusive romance options purely on the grounds of we (the gays (me)) are starving so badly for gay romance options, but you look at me and tell me that garrus vakarian wouldn’t bust it wide open for “one-man-cybernetically-augmented-superman” mshep or tali’zorah “hero-worship-sublimated-to-romantic-feelings” vas normandy wouldn’t let femshep turn that suit into a full-body dental dam then you are a coward. also jack is the most bisexual woman i’ve ever seen and bioware is too chicken to acknowledge it.

2b, subheading a. that said, i hate the bethesda route of “playersexual npcs” where the romance routes are totally identical regardless of player gender, but with mad libs style fill-in-the-blank-with-your-pronouns-here writing. idk if there’s an easy compromise to make here.

[ask-de-writer]

PARADOX PLANET (1 part) The arrival of men on the World of Sea

Return to the Master Story Index

Return to the World of Sea

GONE TO SEA

by

De Writer (Glen Ten-Eyck)

Excerpt from a novel of Sea presently in progress

2579 words

copyright 2020

writing begun 2005

All rights reserved.  This document may not be copied or distributed on or to any medium or placed in any mass storage system except by the express written consent of the author.

//////////////

Copyright fair use rules for Tumblr users

Users of Tumblr.com are specifically granted the following rights.  They may reblog the story provided that all author and copyright information remains intact.  They may use the characters or original characters in my settings for fan fiction, fan art works, cosplay, or fan musical compositions.  

All sorts of fan art, cosplay, music or fiction is actively encouraged.

///////////////////////

1. Paradox Planet

This was going to be difficult, thought Captain Alain. In the wardroom of his ship, the ESA 14, he faced Mr. Torres, the leader of the colonial expedition. Mr. Torres was not a happy man.

“This is an outrage!” he said ferociously. “I can read clocks and calendars as well as any! We were to be awakened from Crossover Sleep on arrival at the system. It has been over a year, local time, since you got here.” He paused to breathe heavily, angrily and went on, “Now, only I have been awakened! What are you up to?”

Captain Alain Looked over at the gray painted metal bulkhead relieved only by pictures mounted to the wall. The duty crews painted them as a hobby to fill the long empty years of the passage. Even faster than light Crossover Drives had limits. Stars were still an unimaginably great distance apart, many of them were years apart. This expedition, two hundred and eighteen light-years distant from Earth, at just over twenty one years of flight time, was no exception. Unless some further distant worthwhile planet had been found in the passing years, this was the longest colonial run that the ESA had tried.

Captain Alain looked down at the pile of files, data disks and crystals in front of him and back to Mr. Torres. He decided to be blunt.

“You know that due to energy constraints, this had to be a one way trip for you and the other colonists. We were trying to find a way to save your expedition’s lives. We failed.”

That brought Mr. Torres up short. “Trying to save us? You failed?” His eyes went wide, “Did my people die?”

“No, they are all well and asleep. The problem is not on the ship. It is the target world. It is everything that the probe reported. We need to report back and have the probes reprogrammed. Nobody expected a world like Sea.”

“C?”, asked Mr. Torres, puzzled. “Is it because it’s the third world? Why call it C?”

“Sea, as in ocean,” said Captain Alain reaching into his pile of data and handing over a crystal. “Look for yourself.”

Mr. Torres activated the viewing controls and knit his brows in concentration as he examined the picture and data flowing beneath it. “Where are the land masses? On the other side? It says that I’ve rotated the view but it’s no different.”

“It did rotate, Mr. Torres. There is no land anywhere on Sea.” Captain Alain paused to collect his thoughts. “So far as we can tell, the last island sank for good between one and a half and two and a half million years ago.” He gestured at the image. “If you boost the magnification far enough you will find floating weed mats and shallow areas that you can use to follow the rotation of the globe.”

Mr. Torres looked again, at high magnification. The skilled ecologist in him rebelled at what he was seeing. “This is not possible. Without land masses to break up air flows by both barrier and convection effects the atmosphere should turn into high speed bands of wind.”

“My crew and I are well aware of the problem, Mr. Torres,” said Captain Alain with the air of one who wished that he had not found the answer to a puzzle. “The reason that the atmosphere does not band is every bit as bad as what you have just seen.”

Once again he removed an image crystal from his pile of data. “As you watch this, bear in mind that it is a direct recording of an actual event. You can change the time compression to suit your own taste. It won’t alter what you will see.” Wryly he added, “We have already said that it’s impossible. It will spare you the effort.”

In utter disbelief, Mister Torres stopped the crystal playback and restarted it several times. It showed the birth of a storm. A large rotating depression was forming at about sixty five degrees South Latitude. Sympathetically, Captain Alain said, “Go ahead and let it play. It only gets worse.”

The storm swept north along a large curve that appeared to be dictated by Coriolis force. The warmer seas of the tropics fueled the storm and it grew into a monster with a core of powerful storm cells over a thousand miles across. The vastly aberrant storm’s clouds did not limit themselves to the troposphere. They towered high into the stratosphere, where no sane cloud mass, let alone a whole cyclonic storm, belonged. The wind speeds achieved over three hundred and twenty kilometers per hour.

The counterclockwise rotation of the storm should have killed it when it crossed the equator to the Northern Hemisphere where the same Coriolis force would now try to make the storm rotate clockwise. Instead, the storm broke apart into individual thunderstorms that followed precise vectors across the equator and reassembled themselves into a giant clockwise rotating storm, all angular momentum preserved, and with no loss of wind speed.

It followed a Coriolis arc north and finally cold northern waters robbed its energy. It broke up into thunderstorms, squalls and fogs about sixty five degrees North Latitude.

Captain Alain said, “Hard to believe, isn’t it? We have observed eight of those aberrations of nature and they ALL do that. Because of the form of the path that they follow, we are calling them Coriolis Storms. It’s as though there were a guiding intelligence handling the storm. Lovely fantasy. It would take at least nine of the most powerful synchronous orbit Weather Sats with a fleet of Low Orbit backups to get even one of those storms across the equator. It would be touch and go, even with equipment like that. All that we have here are the three moons and the primary star. We just haven’t figured out the natural mechanism yet, that’s all.

“The worst part of this is that while the spacing and placement of the storms appears to be completely unpredictable, statistically every part of the planet will get hit at least once every five years by one of these monsters. The crew has a betting pool on where and when the next one will occur. The sample is still too small to be sure but it is beginning to appear that the storms are not completely random in their occurrence.”

Mister Torres surprised Captain Alain. He accepted the statements without comment and quietly sat, thinking. At last he spoke thoughtfully, “I’m not an engineer but perhaps we can deal with the storms by going under them. Build domes or habitats on the reefs maybe. The water is calm only a few feet below the waves.”

Captain Alain gave Mister Torres points for being quick on his mental feet. Gently, he said, “My crew and I ARE engineers. We did think of that. Unfortunately, it can’t be done. A dome is an engineering nightmare. The buoyancy is massive. The pressure gradient from top to bottom is all wrong. The air pressure inside the dome is controlled by the depth of the lowest part of it. That means that the dome will try to burst at the top because the water pressure is lowest there and the inside air is at the pressure of deepest part where the water pressure is highest. Small habitats would be possible except that we don’t have the materials to build that many of them and can’t get what we need from the environment.

“We brought equipment to mine on land or in space. We can fabricate almost any device except for a tiny problem. There’s no land to mine and the rest of the system is metal poor. This world does have quite a lot of high quality ores. Unfortunately they are under about fifty to over nine hundred meters of water. We can’t get at them. Captain Alain inhaled heavily and added, “We can’t even get useful silica sand on this planet. It’s in the same situation as the metal ores. The common coral sand is useless for glass making.

“What we can do is process the local coral and coral sands into a form of concrete. It is possible to get useful amounts of aluminum, magnesium and small amounts of titanium from the seawater. We can go to the three moons for silicates to make glasses. They even have small amounts of available iron and some other useful metals. The silicates make structural glass a real possibility. Fiberglass is also practical. Many of the local seaweeds will process to yield various useful plastic resins for both the fiberglass and to mold directly into useful objects.

“In this environment, only the titanium and structural glass are durable. Corrosion will destroy the other metals in short order. Concrete made from coral is subject to long term erosion by the water, not to mention the many animals and plants that will attack it. Even the fiberglass will have a limited life due to long term water absorption. Of course you can recycle the fiberglass materials.”

Now it was Mister Torres who spoke. “You know about the nutritional deficiency issues of this world, um … Sea? Good name, by the way.”

Captain Alain accepted the compliment with a nod and replied, “Yes. You will be short a pair of critical amino acids, a small raft of vitamins, and there’s a carbohydrate problem of some sort.”

It was Mister Torres who spread his hands now. “You are right. We brought the solutions to all of that along in the form of crop seeds and embryonic animals. We did not expect to have no place to raise them. Hydroponics could answer the plant problem, perhaps. The animals are a different matter altogether. They have to have a certain amount of space for proper development.” He paused and looked thoughtfully at a painting of Mt Fuji, back on Earth, “Could we bypass the growth of the animals and do a carniculture system? I ask because that is more an engineering problem.”

Captain Alain considered in his turn. Mister Torres let him think. A thousand lives hung in the balance. At last, Captain Alain said, “It could be done. It has been done before. There is a nutrient limitation. You have to be able to supply the culture tissues with the necessary amino acids. The whole animal would manufacture its own from the crops fed to it. The culture can’t do that. I think that with the available resources, you are stuck with raising the animals whole. I can ask. We didn’t think of that solution.” He dictated a note for his ship’s system engineers to look into it.

Suddenly Mister Torres exclaimed, “Those storms all follow the same pattern! That means that if we build a platform, we can design it to be strongest in a direction that will resist the storms best! What sort of tidal variation are we dealing with?”

Captain Alain thought a moment and consulted his data. His brows knit as he worked through the problem. “When the sun and the moons line up unfavorably, the sea level can drop until the shallows become shoal-water. At the other extreme, the water depth can go to twenty meters. A storm depression coupled with a low tide can actually bare the upper parts of the coral. That kills the coral and limits upward growth.”

Mister Torres shook his head. “Between storms, coral should grow on the skeletons of the dead coral and cause island building. Why doesn’t it?”

Captain Alain realized from the form of the question that Mister Torres was giving him credit for intelligence and was pleased. He answered, “There’s a common fish with a hard beak. It seems to think that the dead coral is a delicacy and mows the reef down as it grazes. It chews up the stone to get the dead organisms. That’s what makes the coral sand.”

Mister Torres nodded. “Like the parrot fish back home. Makes sense. The same fish attacks our concrete too?”

Captain Alain just nodded. Then he had a thought. Excitedly he said, “We could put titanium mesh in the outer layers of the concrete. That would keep the fish out of anything structural. Once the platform was built, you could process more concrete on your own. You could re-plaster the areas that the fish attack.”

He subsided, “You’d have all your eggs in one basket, though. The thing would have to be huge. We can only marshal the resources to build one.”

“It’s not really that important,” said Mister Torres softly. “There’s no possible way for us to survive until a ship can return with what we do need. Still, we have to have the platform for morale reasons. My people need hope. It’s all that we can really do for them.”

Captain Alain suggested, “We can request a recovery expedition as soon as we get back. It is ESA policy to have a colony ship ready for just such an emergency.”

Mister Torres shook his head negatively. “I fear that the war that was shaping up will be long over when you get back. I pray that you will be able to survive your return. I do not think that there is any possibility of our survival.”

Captain Alain looked compassionately at Mister Torres. He shook his head. “You’re right. The war will change everything back home. We received messages from Earth before we got The drive up to threshold energy. The shooting did start. We were ordered to return but disobeyed. I can only hope that some form of the ESA has survived.

“As for your platform, even with the Crossover Drive to push us faster than light, we can’t get back to you in time. No platform that we can build will survive long enough. It is going to get hit by at least five and probably more of those Coriolis Storms. One of them will sweep it away. Without its facilities, your people will die of malnutrition in fairly short order.”

Mister Torres looked back at Captain Alain and said bleakly, “I know that. What we are going to do is simple. We will lie to your crew and my colonists alike. We will fake evidence to show that the necessary nutrients can be found in the ecology. We just can’t localize them well enough from space. The search will keep hope in them to the last.”

Captain Alain closed his eyes in pain. This was indeed difficult. Why couldn’t Mister Torres be angry, rail at fate or just cry? This calm acceptance, this cold blooded planning to deceive a thousand doomed people was beyond him. He shook himself and said, “Very well, we will follow your lead. Two of my crew will have to be in the conspiracy. They are needed to create the false data.”

That simply, the decision was made. With massive labor, a platform was built with all of the best systems, electronic controls and computerized communications. It held laboratories, shops, apartments, docks for boats, recreational and farming spaces. All critical exposed areas, like the upper levels of the farms, could be closed over with locking domes in bad weather. On the platform, a space one kilometer by one and a half kilometers, several stories thick, a thousand people were left on a planet that could not support them. Only one of their number actually knew what had been done.

–The End–

Return to the Master Story Index

Return to the World of Sea

[epickendall]

Possible 10 chapter 13

Two days later, at Middleton High School in the lunchroom during lunchtime, Monique, Kim, and Ron were eating lunch together, enjoying their food, and Monique brought some good news to the table.

"So Ben asked me out on a date this morning," said Monique who grins

"That is great Monique where he is taking you?" said Kim

"He taking me to a fancy restaurant call The Crown is that outside of town,"

"I heard about that place  I heard they got some great food and they even serve some frog legs and snails," said Ron  who take a bite out of his lunch

"Gross I am not going to eat some nasty snail or frog legs, Ron,"

Ron shrugs his shoulders "hm, I guess those types of food are not for everyone I guess,"

"So Monique what are you going to wear on your date?" said Kim

"I was thinking of wearing the short blue dress, white jacket, black boots, and the silver necklace that I have," said Monique

"Wow, Monique in those clothes Ben wouldn't keep his eyes off of you all night,"

"Yeah, I just hope this date goes well Kim,"

"I'm sure it will Monique Ben sounds like a great guy,"

"And the fact you're in love with him already," said Ron

Monique blushes "W-what no Ron this is our first date it doesn't mind that we're on that stage of the relationship yet,"

"Then why are you blushing then Monique," Ron with a smug look

Kim giggles a bit

"That b-because um...shut up and eat your food, Ron,"

"Anyway what time are two going to meet up with Ben Monique?" said Kim

"About 6:30 pm oh I just can't wait to see him,"

"Hey if you don't mind Monique can you get me those fancy french cake while you're at the restaurant," said Ron

"Sure Ron,"

The three continued to talk to each other during lunchtime, and Monique was too excited for her date with Ben, but she was not in love with him; however, that might not be indeed genuine.

On the date night, Ben arrives outside of The Crown. He is wearing some formal clothes that he went shopping in the afternoon for his date. Ben wore a black blazer, white-collar shirt, black pants, white socks, and black pants. Ben is nervous about his actual date with Monique seeing how the last one goes with his Ex Julee and the arrival of Ship.

"I just hope no alien ruin this date," Ben thought he look down at his watch "I should just tell her about the Omnitrix tonight, so I don't have to lie to her if we are going to go on more dates,"

"Ben," Ben turned around to see Monique wearing a short blue dress, white jacket, black boots, and silver necklace Monique made a flirtatious smile, "so what do you think?"

Ben speechless at first but he managed to make a full sentence "you look gorgeous,"

"And look handsome in that blazer of yours,"

"Thanks,"

"Shall we go inside," Monique grabs Ben hands

"Let's,"

Ben and Monique walk in the restaurant together. Ben already made the reservation for a table, so they get their table that has a window view of the city. The two teens looked around at the restaurant to see a white and gold color theme on the walls, tables, and chandeliers. It also has several statues of famous french monuments and oil painting.

"Wow Ben this place is so fancy how did you manage to get a reservation for this place?" said Monique

"Well, my grandpa is a friend with the guy who owns a couple of this restaurant around the country," said Ben

"The same grandpa, you told me that is a former astronaut for NASA?"

"The very same,"

"He sounds amazing,"

"You can meet him, Monique, he is going to be here tomorrow,"

"I'll take you up on that offer,"

Ben takes a look at the menu to see several different french foods like Croque Monsieur, Pot au Feu, and Ratatouille.

"Boy I hope I can eat one of these foods on this menu," Ben thought

Then a waiter with a black tux comes to their table, "so what do you two like to drink?"

"I would like Ice tea," said Monique

"And you sir,"

"I would take a coke cola," said Ben

"Alright, I'll have your two drinks in a moment," the waiter left to get the two drinks

"While we wait I like to ask you something Ben?" said Monique

"Ask anything Monique,"

"Have you ever wanted to do something that would be great for you but you worry about how it will affect the people you care about,"

"Yes, I do, why do you ask Monique?"

"See it's my dream to study in fashion Paris and learn more about the fashion industry,"

"That sounds like a great dream, but what's the problem, Monique?"

"Well I would be leaving behind my friends and my family I'm not sure it would be worth it,"

"Monique look," Ben grabs one of her hand "I'm sure your friends and family will be happy that you're following dreams no matter what the cost,"

Monique smiled "you're real sweet Ben,"

Through the night has been going so far good for Ben as he and Monique had a good time with no trouble at all. When the time came rolling down, Ben and Monique were waiting for their dinner to go to their table.

"I wonder what's taking so long for our order?" said Ben

"Maybe they have a tall order ahead of us," said Monique

"I think this is the best time to tell her," Ben thought and said "Monique I got something to tell you,"

"What's that, Ben?"

"You see it's about my job,"

"What about your job?"

"Thing is.." then Ben gets interpreted by the ground shaking and screams from outside "Oh what now,"

Then out of nowhere, a car comes crashing through the front of the restaurant doors, and making a large hole, Ben sees what causes the hole in the wall. To be a massive bright orange cat, with two eyes, two tails, large fangs, and little horns on its forehead. Ben Especially sees who's on top of the cat to be his old enemy from his childhood is Dr.Amino, who is wearing a messy white lab coat, red goggles brown pants, and black boots.

"Dammit on all the days Dr.Amino has to break out of prison why now," Ben thought groans "I better take care of this," Ben turn to Monique and said "Monique I need you to stay here I'm going to help out if anyone hurt,"

"But Ben it could be dangerous,"

"Don't worry I'll be fine just stay safe," Ben left the table

"Please be safe Ben," Monique thought

Ben goes out of the restaurant and goes behind a car with no one looking, and he goes to his Omnitrix, he transforms into Fasttrack. "Fasttrack great just guy I need,"

Fasttrack runs in front of Dr.Animo, and his mutant cat Dr.Animo looks down to see who's blocking him.

"I recognize that symbol on your chest, Ben Tennyson I presume," said Dr.Animo

"Yes it's me, look I'm kinda busy, and you and your cat is ruining my night," said Fasttrack crossing his arms

"I don't care me, and my cat minion would take revenge on the world that mocks and humiliate me,"

"Yeah yeah, evil speech rant later Amino just surround before I kick your ass as usual,"

"You would do no such thing my minion attack this pest," Dr.Animo mutant cat shoots acid from its mouth, but Fasttrack dodges it

"I gave you a chance," Fasttrack uses it quickness to run around the mutant to make small tornado under to knock the cat down he quickly hits the cat "that care of Garfield now Animo," who try to run to the back of the restaurant unnoticed

"I can't sit here and wait forever I have to see he's okay," Monique thought she left her table and went outside then she hears lasers sound, and she turns the corner

Monique couldn't believe her eyes to see a guy with green skin, and wearing a lab coat is shooting at a blue thing that she could not see, but it's blur every time it moves from the laser.

"Damn you, Tennyson, for ruining my planes,"

"Wait, did he say, Tennyson?" Monique thought

"Dude you make it so easy to beat you," then the creature made a quick jab to the madmen face and knocks him out then the symbol on the creature chest started to beep and flash red then it turns back to Ben who looks down on the ground "I hope Monique is still inside,"

"Ben," Ben looks to see Monique "How did you do turn into that blue creature and what's going on,"

Ben gulp "I can explain,"

Later at a Burger food truck a few miles away from the restaurant, Getting some food while Ben explains everything to Monique about the Omnitrix and everything else after Dr.Animo is arrested on the spot.

"So let me get this straight you got a watch that let's transform into all sort of aliens, and you fight evil aliens and crazy criminals," said Monique

"Yes," said Ben

"And your friend and cousin are half aliens and you guys work for an intergalactic force that is name Plumbers,"

"Yep,"

"When were you going to tell me about all of this, Ben?"

"Tonight actually but Dr.Animo ruin my chance to tell you,"

"Yet Kim and Ron knows too," Monique who frowns

"That because of the whole kidnapping thing but look if you don't ever want to see me again  I completely understand,"

Monique sighs "look, Ben, I'm not that mad,"

"You aren't?"

"No, I understand that you have to keep the secret like a superhero I'm just mad about the lying to me about it,"

"Look I swear I would never lie to you again Monique I promise,"

Monique takes a look at Ben who looks scared and honest at Monique, and she smiles a bit "I'll give you one more chance Ben,"

Ben smile "really,"

"Yes come here you dork,"

The two teens went closer to each other and shared a passionate kiss for a few minutes and stopped.

"Worth it," Ben thought

"Now I would totally like to hear more about your aliens, Ben," said Monique

"Sure we got all the time in the world,"

[slbp-secret-cupid]

Aphrodisiacs (Nobuyuki/MC, 18+)

Happy Valentine’s Day, @meruchan!! I am your Secret Cupid~ I’m here to deliver you some Nobuyuki love~ I know you were hoping for something M-rated/smutty, so I tried my best to insert a couple of steamy scenes, haha! I’ve never actually written smut before, so hopefully this turned out okay!

Also, it’s been a looong time since I’ve written something, so I’m sure everything’s all over the place! Since I’m just trying to get back into the swing of writing again, any comments would be appreciated! :) Enjoy!

APHRODISIACS

PAIRING: Sanada Nobuyuki/MC

RATING: 18+ (contains some smutty descriptions and adult/sexual topics)

~*~*~*~

“WHAT?!” Umeko exclaimed. “You’ve been dating for over a month and you STILL haven’t done it?! How is that even possible?!”

“Now, now, Umeko! Maybe he’s just being a gentleman…?” Matsuko interjected as she gestured for Umeko to calm down.

I could only cringe at Umeko’s outburst – not that I blamed her for her reaction, since I was starting to get concerned myself. It was already a shock to me that I was even dating THE Nobuyuki Sanada! He was the heir to an illustrious family business and I was but an apprentice cook at a small, though well-known, Japanese restaurant. He frequented the restaurant often as a customer, and, somehow, we had hit it off and eventually started dating almost two months ago.

“Yeah, he’s been nothing but a gentleman, in fact,” I responded with a sigh. “Maybe it’s because he knows I’m a virgin and doesn’t want to rush me… But, to be honest, I want him to try something with me!”

“Have you tried telling him that?” Umeko asked. “Sometimes you just have to get straight to the point!”

“Well… I’ve been too embarrassed to say anything. This is my first real relationship, and I don’t want to come off weird, you know,” I replied, feeling my face heat up with a blush. Really, I was mostly embarrassed at the amount of time I spent fantasizing about him in inappropriate ways. He really didn’t need to know that.

“Hmmmm, yeah, you don’t want to look too desperate either, I guess,” Matsuko added with a nod.

We all fell silent as we pondered my dilemma. After a few seconds, I opened my mouth to tell them to not worry about it, but was interrupted by Umeko snapping her fingers with a gasp.

“I’ve got it! I just remembered this article I read in a magazine!! I still have it in my purse – hold on!”

Umeko scrambled off my couch and dashed over to her purse, nearly colliding with the wall in her excitement. Moments later, she pulled out a popular tabloid I’d often seen at the checkouts at the grocery store and dropped it into my lap.

“Here, I’ll lend it to you. There was an article in there about natural aphrodisiacs and it lists a bunch of food that apparently makes you super horny! Why don’t you try cooking him up a dinner with some of those aphrodisiacs and get him in the mood! You know, seduce him!!Maybe that will jump start him to, well, jump you!”

“Oooh, seduction might not be a bad idea! Nowadays it’s totally normal for the girl to make the first move, you know!” Matsuko chimed in, having seemingly forgotten her previous comment about not looking desperate.

“Seriously?!” I exclaimed. It’s not that I hadn’t heard of aphrodisiacs, but I just didn’t think they were actually real. Besides that, me seduce him?! I already felt way out of my league!! He was always so calm and collected, I couldn’t even imagine him falling for any kind of seductions!

“Well, just read it first and decide! You never know!” Umeko giggled.

All I could do was sigh and reluctantly accept the magazine. Once I’d promised to give the article a read, our conversation moved on to other topics and it wasn’t long before our girls’ night ended and Umeko and Matsuko went home.

Alone now in my apartment, I settled down on my couch and started to flip through the magazine. It was aimed primarily at women and contained various articles on skin care, fashion, diets and of course… love advice. I blushed as I landed on an article about the newest sex toys. Though I’d heard about them from my friends, I’d always been too shy to buy one myself. I couldn’t help but skim the article out of curiosity. It was a review on a new product that was aimed at virgins – apparently it was designed to help ‘train’ women who were nervous about having sex for the first time.

I could feel a blush spread across my cheeks and the skin on the back of my neck prickled. I ignored the warm feeling that spread through my abdomen and quickly flipped to the next page.

“Here it is… ‘In this edition of ‘The Lover’s Guide’, we’ll introduce you to thirty natural aphrodisiacs to spice up your love life!’” I read out loud to myself, cringing at how corny it sounded.

However, despite my doubts, I started reading the article, mostly fueled by my own desperation. The article listed out various food products that would, apparently, increase one’s sex drive while explaining the ‘science’ behind it. Oysters apparently contained zinc, which is supposed to boost the male sex drive, and amino acids, which can trigger increased levels of sex hormones. Chocolate contains 'feel-good’ chemicals phenylethylamine and serotonin. Certain spices acted as sexual stimulants. The list went on and on.

As I read more of the article, I soon found myself forgetting my skepticism as the culinary side of my brain automatically started piecing together a menu using these ‘aphrodisiacs’. Soon, I was already making a mental grocery list and thinking of how I could plate and present each course…

~*~*~*~

I had just placed the plate of dessert into my fridge when I heard the doorbell ring.

“Coming!” I called as I stripped off my apron and hung it up on its hook. When I opened the door, I came face-to-face with the handsome, smiling face of my boyfriend.

“Good evening,” Nobuyuki greeted before leaning down to kiss me chastely on the cheek. Leaning back, he gently handed me a bouquet of vibrant red roses. “For you. Happy Valentine’s Day.”

“They’re beautiful! Thank you!” I exclaimed, cradling the bouquet gently as I stepped aside to let him inside.

“I also brought a bottle of champagne,” Nobuyuki added as he shut the door behind him. He slipped off his shoes and placed his work bag on the floor. I couldn’t stop myself from admiring his broad shoulders through his perfectly-tailored shirt as they shrugged off his coat.

“Is something wrong?”

I was suddenly snapped out of my ogling by Nobuyuki’s voice and I realized that I hadn’t moved since he’d come in.

“Sorry, I was just distracted! Are you hungry?” I asked, turning my back to him to hide the guilty flush on my face. Trying to distract myself, I walked into my kitchen, intending to look for a vase for the flowers.

However, a moment later, I squeaked as I suddenly felt Nobuyuki wrap his arms around me from behind.

“I’m famished,” he breathed into my ear. I shuddered as I felt his breath on the back of my neck. All too quickly, though, he let me go with a chuckle and made his way over to the dining table.

“Gr-great!” I stammered. This man was not good for my heart!! “Because I prepared a lot of food!”

Taking a deep breath, I opened my fridge and prepared myself for… the worst? The best? I honestly wasn’t sure what to expect, but, well…. here went nothing.

I reached into my fridge, pulled out a bowl and set it on the table. It contained raw oysters laid out on a bed of ice chips.

“Oysters?” Nobuyuki breathed, his slender eyebrows raising in surprise.

“Yes, they were on sale! So, I thought it might be nice to indulge!” I quipped, sitting down across from him and setting down a plate of lemon wedges and a couple of small serving plates. “Umm, you don’t dislike oysters, do you?”

I raised my eyes to study his face nervously, but he simply smiled back at me gently, his head tilting slightly to one side with the gesture.

“Not at all. I just wasn’t… expecting it. I’m happy to eat anything you make for me.”

“Well, that’s a relief! Help yourself then!”

I knew that any effects from the food wouldn’t be instantaneously, but I found myself holding my breath anyway as I watched Nobuyuki reach for an oyster. He squeezed a few drops of lemon juice on it before delicately raising it to his mouth. My mind automatically flickered back to the magazine article I had read earlier last week. Not only were oysters full of zinc and amino acids for boosting the sex drive, it was said that oysters were also sexually appealing because of the sensual way that they were eaten.

That article couldn’t have been more right. It was as if my brain was running in slow-motion. My eyes fixated on Nobuyuki’s mouth as he tipped the oyster into his mouth. I was acutely aware of every movement of his lips as the oyster moved past his lips and I could feel a hot coiling feeling ignite in my stomach as he made a slurping sound. My mouth went dry as he made an appreciative sound – moan, it was a moan, my brain screamed – and licked his lips.

God, those lips… I couldn’t even count the amount of times he’d kissed me breathless with those lips. He was an amazing kisser, and I couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel if those skillful lips kissed the rest of my body. Especially between my thighs.

Before I knew it, my brain flashed to an image of Nobuyuki’s head between my legs. He would moan, as he had just now, as his tongue languidly licked along my folds. I could hear wet, slurping sounds as his lips sucked at my pussy, drinking up the juices flowing out. I had never felt so wet before, and I couldn’t tell whether the wetness came from myself or was simply his saliva. Then, suddenly, I gasped as he teased a finger between my wet lower lips, pushing in as he continued his ministrations with his mouth.  The sensation made me groan and I could feel another gush of hot liquid flow out as he reached in deeper with his finger. I couldn’t help pressing myself against his face, pushing him in deeper—

“You’re not eating?”

“S-sorry! I was just waiting for you to try the first one!” I yelped, my mind slamming back to reality at his question.

I couldn’t believe that I had just did that!! I mentally slapped myself for suddenly drifting off to fantasyland and reached for an oyster myself. Instead, I forced myself to make small talk to distract my brain, and soon we had finished the oysters, along with some of the champagne. I then pulled out the next course from the oven.

“Baked salmon with asparagus,” I said, placing Nobuyuki’s plate before him.

According to the article, salmon contained omega 3s which are linked to serotonin boosting your happiness and mood. Meanwhile, asparagus is rich in vitamin B6 and folate, which are said to increase arousal and orgasm. Not to mention their suggestive shape…

“Oh, I also tried making it spicy – since I know you like your food on the flavourful side,” I added. Chili peppers apparently stimulated the release of endorphins and generated physiological responses in the body similar to those experienced during arousal, like sweating and increased heartrate.

“Ah, that definitely has quite a kick to it,” Nobuyuki commented as he finished several bites of his salmon. “I’m certainly feeling the heat, now, haha.”

He put down his fork and knife and loosened the collar of his dress shirt, undoing the first couple of buttons. My eyes automatically followed the sudden motion of his hands and followed the ‘v’ of his slightly open shirt. I could see a light sheen of sweat along his neck, which was slightly flushed. My gaze moved up to his face, staring at his parted lips as he fanned himself lightly with his hand. The look on his face instantly sent another shot of heat down to my privates and I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.

I couldn’t help but wonder if this would be the expression he’d make in bed. Perhaps he’d look like that, covered in a light layer of sweat, with locks of his soft hair sticking to his skin and lips parted in pants as my hand moved along his shaft. I imagined him groaning my name as I stroked him up and down, keeping my grip at just the right pressure for his abdomen to tense underneath me. Just when beads of pre-cum start dripping out, I dipped my head down to cover his tip with my mouth. I flick my tongue over his head, lapping up the beads of liquid, relishing in the gasp that escapes his mouth. Then, I slipped my grip lower as I took in more of him into my mouth—

Oh my GOD, STOOOOOP!!! I screamed at my mind, shaking my head as I quickly went back to my meal, attacking my salmon with a vengeance.

I thanked the magazine article for giving me the idea to use chili, as the heat from the food gave me an excuse to hide the blush on my face. I felt my face get even warmer as I realized that I could feel a slight wetness between my legs. How was it possible that I was this turned on?! Maybe there was something to this aphrodisiac business…

Though I was feeling heated, when I glanced over at Nobuyuki, he looked completely calm, the heat from the chili seasoning long gone. He had finished eating his portion already and was casually sipping at his champagne while watching me with hooded eyes and a light smile. It was a familiar expression on him, and I often caught him looking at me this way, though I never could figure out what he was thinking. One thing was for certain, though: this look always gave me butterflies.

“Do you still have room for dessert?” I asked, trying to distract myself from drowning in that smoldering gaze.

“Certainly. What’s on the menu?”

“Well, since it’s Valentine’s Day, I really wanted to do something with chocolate! And I saw this fondue set on sale at the department store the other day, so – chocolate fondue!” I responded as I cleared the dining table of our dinner plates.

I then quickly put together the fondue set and started melting the dark chocolate I had bought. I then pulled out the plate of fresh fruit that I had painstakingly prepared. The article had cited chocolate as an aphrodisiac, which made it a convenient fit for our Valentine’s dinner. I had also relied on the article to pick out many of the fruits on the platter. Those fruits apparently contained certain vitamins and minerals that were supposed to elevate energy levels and promote positive moods – which would lead to being in the mood.

“Ah, the fruits look delicious,” Nobuyuki commented, already swiping up a strawberry and popping it into his mouth.

I smiled at his boyish behaviour. He was always so put together, but, when it came to dessert, he always let his guard down just a little bit. I would have never expected him to have such a sweet tooth – and he was especially partial to fruits.

“Strawberries, bananas, cherries, mangos, pineapples… and what’s this?” Nobuyuki asked, pointing at the small round balls sitting with the fruit on the platter.

“Oh, they’re cinnamon doughnut bites. I thought it might be nice to toss in a different texture.” I responded. The real reason, though, was that cinnamon had also been listed in the article as an aphrodisiac. Apparently, the spice produced heat within the body and facilitated sexual arousal.

“Doughnuts, hmmm? Yukimura would be jealous – he loves doughnuts.”

“Oh, I made a lot – you can take some leftovers for him, if you want.”

“Thank you, I think I will. It’ll be a nice repayment since I borrowed something from him earlier this week.”

As soon as the chocolate was melted and ready, Nobuyuki immediately picked up one of the doughnuts with his fingers – completely ignoring the small fork I had put out for him – and dipped it into the chocolate. However, instead of putting it into his own mouth, I found the chocolate-covered doughnut dangling in front of my lips.

“Say, ‘ahhhh’,” Nobuyuki said, his eyes narrowing in a smile.

I couldn’t help but blush a little as I opened my mouth. Nobuyuki popped the doughnut into my mouth and I felt my lips and tongue brush against his fingers before he moved them away.

“Oh my, looks like I made a bit of a mess,” he remarked, looking at his hand. Perhaps he had dipped the doughnut into too much chocolate, or it had simply dripped down onto his hand when he had fed it to me, but bits of melted chocolate covered his fingers.

Without another thought, he brought his hand to his lips and began to languidly lick the chocolate off his fingers. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from watching the movement of his tongue lapping over his fingers – the motion was far more sensual than it had any right to be. Whether it was caused by the cinnamon on the doughnut or something completely more primitive, I immediately felt a burst of heat through my lower abdomen.

It was going to be a long night….

~*~*~*~

As I stepped out of the washroom, I saw Nobuyuki slip something – it looked like a card – into a gift bag. He then capped the pen he was holding, stowing it back into his pocket.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t stay later, dear one,” he murmured apologetically as he shrugged on his coat. He had suddenly been called back to the office to deal with an urgent work situation, so our night had been cut shorter than expected.

“Oh, please, don’t feel bad! You can’t help it if an emergency comes up. I’m just happy that we were able to finish eating dinner!” I responded, leaning into the kiss he placed on my cheek.

“I’ll make it up to you next time,” he said with a smile before handing me the gift bag. “This is for you, by the way. Please do open it after I leave. I hope you’ll enjoy it.”

“Thank you, Nobuyuki. Flowers and a present? You’re spoiling me!”

“Not at all. Giving this to you may as well be a gift for myself, my dear.”

After slipping on his shoes, he turned around and suddenly I found my face caught between his large hands. A second later, he pulled me in for a kiss. His lips hungrily moved over my own and the soft, pleasant sensation made me moan before I realized – my body still felt hot and bothered and this kiss was doing things to me. I felt his tongue push past my slightly parted lips, deepening the kiss, and I could taste the lingering flavour of chocolate. I was desperate to taste more of him, and pressed myself further into his kiss, but he suddenly pulled away.

“I have to go, now,” he said with a small smile.

Though he sounded apologetic, I could see a teasing twinkle in his eye – he knew exactly what he was doing. He chuckled as I tried to glare at him, but my scowl quickly turned into a smile when he gave me another peck on the cheek.

“Good night, Nobuyuki. Drive safe!”

“Good night. Don’t stay up too late,” he responded with another smile. Then, he left, and I was alone once more in my apartment.

I let out a sigh. Well, there went that plan. I had hoped that he would stay the night and that my aphrodisiac-laden dinner would entice him into finally making a move on me.

Feeling sorry for myself, I picked up the gift bag Nobuyuki had given me and pulled out the tissue paper. I immediately saw an envelope and pulled that out first. I opened the card that was inside and was greeted with Nobuyuki’s neat, flowing script along with a folded piece of paper.

The card itself contained a short and sweet message from Nobuyuki wishing me a happy Valentine’s Day. I then unfolded the piece of paper – it looked like it had been a page ripped out of his notepad or day planner – but, as I read the message, I felt an odd feeling of dread flood through me.

'Happy Valentine’s Day, dear one. The other day, I was reading an article in a magazine that I found in Yukimura’s room. There were some fascinating articles that were quite enlightening. One of those articles gave me the perfect idea for your Valentine’s Day gift. I’m sorry I couldn’t stay to witness you opening your gift. I would’ve loved to see you try it out. I’ve left the magazine for you to read the article yourself as it’s quite informative. I’ve bookmarked the pages for you.’

I immediately looked back into the gift bag as I felt my heart race faster. Sure enough, there was a magazine tucked against the inner siding of the bag. My hand trembled slightly as I pulled it out. It was the exact same magazine that Umeko had lent me, and there were two sticky notes sticking out of the pages.

I flipped to the first sticky note and found myself face-to-face with the article about the sex toy for virgins. I immediately felt heat rush simultaneously up my face and down my neck. Seriously?! A second glance into the gift bag revealed a discreet black box labeled with the name of the sex toy. I wasn’t sure if I should feel flattered or embarrassed.

However, as I flipped to the second bookmark, I decided that I most definitely felt embarrassed.

The second sticky note was stuck on the article about aphrodisiacs and written on said sticky note were the words: 'Thank you for dinner.’

END

[idontgiveaflyinggrayson69]

Anatomy Class

Author: Nat / @idontgiveaflyinggrayson69

Requested: Yes – @real-sunshine  

Tagging: @phoenix-fire-fangirl @thisismysecrethappyplace

Fandom: Avengers

Relationship: Established; Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Peter helps the Reader study for her biology exam by giving her an anatomy lesson.

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: References to sex.

Disclaimer: I do not study anatomy.

Peter was, without a doubt, the smartest person you knew. He was your best friend for most of high school; but, in your senior year he asked you to prom and the two of you had been together, as like dating, ever since.

You harbored a crush on Peter early on. He was smart and funny and caring and sweet, really he was the ideal guy and he was cute, which was a bonus. And you got to watch as your cute best friend got hot throughout tenth and eleventh grade, which escalated your feelings towards Peter.

Peter told you midway through eleventh grade that he was Spider-Man, or, more accurately, you found out midway through eleventh grade that Peter was Spider-Man. You went over to his house to study for a math test and he wasn’t home, so you were just lounging in his room waiting for him to come home when he came home through the window dressed as Spider-Man. Peter was kinda forced to confess at that point.

You were a little upset in the beginning that Peter, your best friend, hid such a big secret from you for so long, but you could never stay mad at Peter for long, so the two of you made up quite quickly. After that, you thought it was pretty cool that your best friend was a super hero, though it did increase your stress levels.

Your stress levels increased a lot more when you realized you loved him. And as Peter got older, the villains he faced got stronger, and the number of times Peter crawled through your window in the middle of the night injured increase too, which scared the living hell out of you.

Maybe it was all of those nights that Peter crawled through your window bleeding, in need of stitches, with broken bones and collapsed lungs, you name it, that pushed you into the medical field, who knows. But, nursing was what you ended up pursuing in College. And nursing meant biology.

You were near the top of your class in high school, but Peter wasthe top of your class. You did good in biology and math and English, but Peter did better. So when College exams rolled around, you looked to your brilliant minded boyfriend to help you study for your biology exam, and Peter was more than willing to help you.

“Okay, let’s start it off easy,” Peter said, leaning back on your bed holding a deck of flash cards. You were seated on your spinning office chair at your desk. “What is the circulatory system?”

“Easy,” you replied. “The circulatory system is also called the cardiovascular system or the vascular system, and it is an organ system that allows blood to circulate and transport nutrients such as amino acids and electrolytes, oxygen, carbon dioxide, hormones, and blood cells to and from the cells in the body to provide nourishment and help fight disease, stabilize temperature and pH, and maintain homeostasis. The circulatory system also includes the lymphatic system, which circulates lymph. The passage of lymph takes much longer than blood.”

“Very good.” Peter replied with a smile. “And what is homeostasis?”

“Um, homeostasis is an organism’s tendency toward a relatively stable equilibrium between interdependent elements?” You answered, but your answer sounded more like a question than a solid answer.

“Are you sure?” Peter asked you. You bit your lip and nodded.

Peter smiled and nodded. “You’re right. You need to have more confidence in yourself, babe.”

You laughed a bit at your boyfriend before gesturing for Peter to continue.

“What is blood exactly? And don’t tell me it’s ‘the red stuff in our bodies.’” Peter said with a laugh.

You joined Peter in laughing before answering. “Blood is a fluid consisting of plasma, red blood cells, white blood cells, and platelets that is circulated by the heart through the vertebrate vascular system, carrying oxygen and nutrients to and waste materials away from all body tissues.”

Peter smiled and nodded. “Yes, you are correct. What is Lymph?”

“Lymph is essentially recycled excess blood plasma after it has been filtered from the interstitial fluid and returned to the lymphatic system.” You replied easily.

Peter nodded as you answered. “That’s right again.” Peter flipped through your flashcards before looking back up to you. “(Y/N/N), you know all of this stuff, I know you do, so what do you really need help studying. Is there anything that you find more challenging that you need to go over?”

You bit your lip as you thought. “I guess general anatomy I have more trouble with. Like, I know where the heart, lungs, liver and all the important stuff is, like your brain and spine, but I have more trouble with remembering the smaller bones and weirdly named muscles…”

Peter nodded and placed an elastic over the flashcards to keep them together. “Okay, then let’s go over anatomy.”

You nodded, “okay.” You turned around and fished through your desk for a minute before pulling out another stack of flashcards. “These are the anatomy ones, but they weren’t helping me. They tell me the muscle name on one side and its placement on the other, but ‘in the thigh’ or ‘it’s the hip bone’ don’t help me remember…” You trailed off before throwing the flashcards at Peter, which he effortlessly caught.

“Hey…” Peter said, placing the flashcards on the bed before standing up and walking over to you. “Don’t worry, I’ll help. We’ll get through this and you’re going to rock the exam, okay?”

You nodded and Peter gestured towards your bed. You stood up and followed Peter to your bed, sitting down at the foot of the bed. Peter took his place back at the head of the bed.

“Okay,” Peter said opening the flashcards. “What is the deltoid?”

You moved your hand to your shoulder. “That’s this one, right? The one just above your biceps and triceps?”

Peter nodded. “Yes it is. Which means your biceps and triceps are where?”

You moved your hand down a bit. “This is my bicep and this is my triceps.”

Peter nodded with a smile. “Yes it is, good job. Three out of three so far!”

You rolled your eyes at your boyfriend, but you couldn’t help but smile.

“Okay, what is the muscle in your chest,” Peter gestured to his chest, “called?”

“Those are your pecs.” You answered with a laugh.

Peter nodded his head. “And the real name is…?”

“Your pectoral muscles.” You answered.

“Pectoralis major.” Peter correct causing you to shake your head, muttering a ‘fuck’ under your breath.

“You were close. You’ll get there eventually.” Peter reassured. “Okay, where is the latissimus dorsi?”

You blinked back at Peter for a moment. “I have no idea.”

“None?” Peter asked.

“None.” You replied.

Peter nodded. “Okay, the latissimus dorsi is in your side, here.” Peter said, moving his hand to his side.

You squinted your eyes at him. “I don’t know where your gesturing to.”

Peter looked down at himself and laughed. He was wearing a big bagging t-shirt with a plaid shirt over top, there was no way you would know where he was pointing at.

“My bad…” Peter said with a small laugh and put the flash cards down before shrugging off his plaid shirt and taking his t-shirt off too.

“What are you…” You trailed off as Peter pointed to his side.

“This,” Peter said stepping off the bed to walk closer to you, standing just a few inches from you, “is my latissimus dorsi.”

You never got tired of seeing Peter without his clothes. He had amazing muscles and you loved to see and touch them. Peter took your hand and placed it on his muscle, “latissimus dorsi.”

“Latissimus dorsi.” You replied, feeling the muscle.

Peter smiled at you and nodded. “See, you’re getting it.”

“I’m getting something…” You muttered.

Peter nodded his head to the flashcards on the bed. “Can you pass them to me?”

You nodded and reached over to grab them, handing them to your shirtless boyfriend standing before you.

“Where are my serratus anteriors?” Peter asked you.

“Anterior means… Okay, they’re here?” You asked, pointing to the middle off Peter’s stomach.

Peter shook his head and moved your hand back towards his latissimus dorsi. “The serratus anterior is next to the latissimus dorsi.”

You nodded and stroked Peter’s muscle once more. “Serratus anterior.”

“What is this muscle called?” Peter asked, moving your hand to his abs.

You laughed and ran your hand down his hard, sculpted abs. “Those are your abs, Pete.”

Peter laughed and nodded. “They are, but what are they officially?”

“Abdominal muscles?” You tried and Peter gave you a pointed look. “No? Okay, are they abdominis intersections?”

Peter gave you a cringing smile. “You’re close.” Peter moved your hand back to where he first put it, his upper abs. “This is my tendinous intersections, and these,” Peter moved your hand down to his lower abs, “are my rectus abdominis. So, you were like half right.”

You laughed and Peter went to ask you the next question. “What is—“

But, Peter never got the opportunity to ask you the next question because you undid his jeans, pushing them down a bit.

“What are you doing?” Peter asked you softly.

“This,” you said, lightly running your finger over the top of his hip bone, “is your iliac, right?”

Peter swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, that’s the iliac. The back,” Peter said, moving your hand to the back of his hip, “is called the iliac crest.”

You nodded and moved your hand down to Peter’s ass. “And this one is the gluteus maximus?”

Peter nodded. “Yeah, that would be my gluteus maximus…”

You smiled at Peter and moved your hand back to the front of his pants. “This is your penis. A penis is also called a cock and it can be used for reproduction.”

“I’m here to help you study…” Peter whispered, stepping back.

You smiled at him. “The reproductive organs are part of anatomy, Peter.”

Peter smiled at you before leaning down to press his lips to yours. His lips were warm and soft against yours and Peter leaned into you further, pressing you into the bed.

“I guess you do have a point.” Peter whispered against your lips.

[bleedingcoffee42]

Eureka AU - Part 9

Weeeeee...here we go.  Future Me is going to be so happy when she edits this and has to make up entire fields of shitpost science.  Hahaha.  

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Ed's eyes shifted over to Mustang who now sounded a lot more like the boss they all knew.  His statement was an order, it wasn't a discussion starter, and Al was already reprogramming his tiny robots to do as asked.    He had to admit, it was good to feel like the condescending asshole was back to being himself because they genuinely needed him.

“That would avoid sending her into shock when you kill a massive load of invasive pathogens in her body.”   Knox said.  He was here to remind everyone his patient was human and this wasn't a simulation. Killing a large quantity of anything in her bloodstream could very well have consequences they were not planning for.   In theory a lot of things sounded good, but they were just desperately looking for any idea that could work at this point and that was not how he practiced medicine.   “I do like the idea of giving the virus something else to attack, that will give her own immune system a chance to fight back as well.”

“How are we going to get the nanites out of her system?”  Marcoh asked. “Now they're going to be twice as big, if not bigger, and she's already lost blood?”

Ed watched Mustang stand up, his focus seemed to have returned and his attitude noticeably changed.  He was back to commanding everyone's attention in the room, they all looked to him even though he hadn't made a sound to indicate he had an answer.  

“Chelation.” Roy said as if the answer was simple and had been there the entire time.   “Dr. Comanche has a project that is meant to extract metals from the blood stream, more than just the common treatment for lead and mercury poisoning.   It's been approved for medical use, extensive testing already.   Last proposal he submitted to me implied he was able to use it to extract valuable metals from any source.   He's trying to market it to me as a way to clean waterways of mercury, but his research paperwork tells me he's also looking to harvest more valuable non-toxic metals in the process.“

Ed saw where Mustang was going with this.  “So he has the equipment to synthesize an amino acid to do his bidding in his lab?”

Roy pulled his keys out of his pocket and held them up.  “Shall we?”

Ed smiled and together they left Al's lab to go take what Comanche had available.  Under any other circumstances he would be delighted they were pillaging his colleagues labs and utilizing the incredible array of resources in this building for good.   Right now he was just happy it was here and they were able to take advance of years of research to save someone they all held dear.   He ran over to the elevator to hit the button and open it for them both to head to the next floor. “So what tipped you off about Comanche?”

  “He clearly doesn't think my field of Thermodynamics includes equilibrium thermodynamics because he might as well have highlighted all the documentation of his side project in the proposal he submitted to me.”

“Not to defend the guy, cause he's a dick, but you are notorious for not looking at paperwork.”  Ed reminded him.  Mustang looked over at him and smiled, a smug smile, that made him think that that was a ruse.   The asshole did read everything.  

“In this instance, I thought it best to catch him harvesting his retirement income from the polluted streams instead of trying to prosecute him based on theoretical research that not judge is going to understand.”   Roy replied.  

“Or let him collect next years budget for you since his inventions are contractually property of the government while he's working in this facility.”   Ed countered.

“You have no idea how much this place costs to keep running.”  Roy said and the doors to the elevator closed and they went up to the next floor.  “You especially cost a lot of money.”

“We might not have to beg for Congressional pocket change if you spent more time being a scientist and less time as a politician.”  Ed said to him and Mustang narrowed his eyes at him.  

“There is honestly nothing good that will come from any projects I create with my specialty.”  Roy said.  “I've come to that conclusion long ago.  I'll do more good filtering what the government sees and receives from Eureka.”

“Like the flame-thrower gloves you keep in your desk?”

“Stop breaking into my office.”   Roy hissed as the bell dinged indicating they were on the next floor.   Ed snorted, as if it was his right.   Fine.  He'd put an end to that.  “I have sex with my wife on that desk.”

“What the fuck, Mustang?”

Roy smiled and stepped off the elevator and walked down the hall to Comanche's lab, room 047.   He unlocked the door and turned on the light.   Together he and Ed started turning on equipment and looking for what they needed.  “Comanche used his biological advancements in the field to get himself hired here, now he's focusing on environmental uses for his research.   I suspect he's doing that to not only gain favor within the community here, which is by nature rooted in finding cleaner and less invasive ways of doing things, but also to divert attention from what he may be doing with his original research.”

Ed was already diving into the files on the computer.    There was a lot of information here and it backed up Mustang's theory that Comanche was a really busy guy.   “Well that would explain how a dude his age can hop around on that peg leg like he's a ballerina.  He's using Chelation to clean his own  body of the wear and tear of aging.  I thought that was bullshit pseudo-science.”

“What's commercially available, yes..”  Roy said and turned on the machine that was used to synthesize the amino acids for the particular task needed.   There were profiles in the computer already for the standard uses of cleaning lead, mercury and arsenic from the body.   There was more though and Roy opened them up to see each to consider the formulas.   “EDTA for cleaning his clogged arteries and another for his joint arthritis.”

“Glad he's testing that on himself but I think keeping the obvious advances to himself is bullshit.” Ed shook his head.  “I see what you're saying about his environmental project.   Someone is a naughty alchemist, pulling lead out of the water and with it- gold.”

“He's probably old enough to have called himself an alchemist.”  Roy replied and heard Ed chuckle.   “I'm sure he's hiding it all so he can diversifiy his retirement fund,  quite the windfall when he takes this to the private sector.   I don't feel bad at all for breaking in here to use it for my own personal reasons.”

“It's personal for all of us too.” Ed said.  “Hawkeye is the best thing to happen to this town in a long time.”

“I'm well aware that if our little feuds ever came to taking sides that this town would have all stood behind her.”  Roy said, thankful that those days were behind them but also with a touch of nostalgia for the rivalry they had started with.  She made him work to outmaneuver her and that was something he couldn't say of a lot of people.  

“Alright, I have something promising here.   Let me upload Al's data and see about making us something. Metallurgy is a specialty of mine I got this.”  Ed said and connected his tablet to the computer and started to work his magic.  

“How is your brother going to handle us targeting his nanites and neutralizing them with this? I'm basically having you classify them as a toxin to have them broken down and flushed down the drain.”  Roy asked.   He didn't want to mention the Ultimate Eye tech they had thrown into the tank that was going to be destroyed with them.     He'd figure out that later.

“Al's not selfish, he understands that the sacrifice is worth it.   It's a setback, but he's patient.” Ed said and kept typing.   Heavy metals and elements were a breeze for him, he barely needed to focus to re-calibrate the program.   “Besides I'm sure he's discussing a catheter and collection bag with Knox as we speak.   Nothing gets flushed down the drain.”

“Riza will be thrilled to hear he's called 'dibs' on her piss.   Life in Eureka never ceases to keep her guessing.”  Roy said and saw data being transferred to the machine he was staring at.  Ed was fast.    He looked at the time and realized it wasn't even midnight yet.  It felt like they had been here forever, that he'd lived a few lifetimes between carrying Riza into the infirmary around 1800 and now.   This was a glimpse of her job, what happened when he was away.   This was why she was so adamant of being read in on everything that had the potential to go to hell, because when it did it was a race to stop a catastrophe.   They played on a whole different playing field here, science without regard to established rules and so often bordering on playing God. When it went wrong, it went horribly wrong.  They had so much they still needed to talk about and he hoped he got the chance.

“She'll be pissed.” Ed snorted and Mustang shot him a look.  “She hates sitting out.”

“That she does.”   Roy said and looked at the screen.  They were ready to begin synthesizing the next step in the process.  

[2spry]

Ozark Foothills 50k Race Recap

Oh man… so I don’t even know where to start. I guess at the beginning. This was my first race back since I broke my foot, 1 year to the day actually. I still can’t believe it worked out that way. I was looking at races that were easy to travel to, and that were loop courses. I wanted a looped course in case my foot said “nope” and I needed to hop off course easily. I signed up for this race only 5 weeks out! I had had a year of major ups and downs, with multiple attempts at upping mileage with no avail. Every time I tried to increase or even add in a little speed work or hill training, my foot would blow up. When I say blow up, the pain would be bad enough to cause me to limp. It wasn’t until really February where I was not having much pain anymore. I hit, on average, in the 60-70 mile range for Jan and Feb, with 116 miles total in March. I also had only 2 speed work sessions (they were easier ones). So I signed up with the goal of only using this as a training run, to make sure my foot could handle the distance. If it did, I was going to pick a longer race next and really train for it! I was extremely nervous because having your foot snap during a race is very scary and the pain is something you never forget. I have had to work hard on my mind this past year because the fear was really taking over. The mind is so powerful. Working hard on mental training has been a huge help for me. That is one of my weaknesses.

The day before the race was crazy!!! I thought I really had everything lined up, but so many things happened which led to getting off late. It worked out though! This was an Altra sponsored race so I was also going to the packet pickup to help out my local Altra rep Erica, and I was covering the race for Road Runner Sports on their Instagram account. Doing both of these things was incredibly fun for me! I love new experiences! Plus, it got me out of my head!!! They had a screening of The Double, and the speaker was Jeff Browning (aka @GoBroncoBilly). It was chalk full of awesome information. One of the main things I took away from his talk was to slay the negative thoughts of the mind. I know this, but to hear someone so accomplished say that they have to do this all the time, really brought it home to me. The mind is so powerful. Once that was over we headed to the hotel.

We got to the hotel around 8:45ish and headed to the room. So far everything had been rather uneventful. Then the room keys wouldn’t work and we got locked out! Phones were in the room (key worked at first and then just wouldn’t, no idea). Anyway, we finally got everything in and ate dinner around 9:30. While I was eating, I realized, oh my goodness, I forgot to get my race packet!!! LOL!!! I mean who does that!?!? Goes to the race packet pickup and forgets to pickup their race packet!?!? Me apparently. Thank goodness they had race day pickup! Then we realized we forgot the bottom to the electric kettle for coffee in the am. Oh well. The front desk was able to provide it. After all that, I finally headed to sleep close to midnight. And sleep I didn’t.

Up at 3:45 exhausted! However, I did not have a headache or migraine which was HUGE!!! I cannot remember a race where I didn’t have one of those the night before or the day of. (When I ran my 50 miler, I had a migraine from the night before and it didn’t abate for 7 hrs of the race!) Not having a headache gave me such a boost!!! We got there at around 6:15 and it was foggy and dark. I had thought for a moment that it wasn’t going to lift, making a note to bring my headlamp next time just in case. It did finally lift and turned into a gorgeous sunrise!

I was super nervous, freezing (yes me the cold weather runner was freezing lol!), and very thankful once she blew the horn to start. I kept reminding myself that this is a training run, no pressure! I started out very conservative. I was really watching my footing (I did the whole race) and just trying to ease into a steady easy pace. It did take me awhile to warm up, but once I got going I felt pretty good! I would say after the 5th mile I felt like I was getting in a groove, getting more comfortable with the terrain, but I could feel my lack of training then too. Just the amount of vert and all the rocks and roots that I am not used to. My quads and ankles let me know that really quick, but I told my mind to shut it, slayed those negative thoughts, and told myself to just enjoy this! (There was 3,800 ft of ascent so lots of hills) I started to look around at the beauty of where I was and just got really emotional. Here I was running, in a gorgeous area, on trails, in an ultra, healthy. What a blessing!!! That gave me a boost and I started to pick up the pace. I think this was around mile 10-12. I started to pass people, but I had no idea what race they were running. You are on the course with 25k, 50k, and 50 mile runners.

Coming through the half, I felt really good! I really was ultra conservative with my footing and therefore hadn’t fallen yet. My upper body felt really good, and I know a big part of this was because of my new race vest fitting seamlessly. Super important to find one that works for your body! I filled up my water bladder with Ultima Replenisher, and headed out! But then had to run back cuz I forgot my MUIR gels!!! LOL! Made a bathroom pitstop and finally headed out. I had no stomach issues with that combination, it worked well!

The hardest mile for me was 17. My hands started to swell like crazy! I was using salt, so I didn’t know why I was swelling so bad. Still unsure of the cause. They were so swollen that I actually thought I was going to have to cut off my ring. I was feeling a bit more tired, and just kind of worried. I started opening and closing my hands and telling myself it was going to be fine. Then, about a mile or two later, it started to go down a bit and relief washed over me. I began to think about all my friends that can’t run right now and began running miles for them, praying for them and for this race. I started to pick up the pace. Once I started running, I began to catch up to people. It was so spread out at this point that passing was pretty easy. I hit a string of two people and wanted to pass them but I kept thinking, no they are keeping you conservative, you don’t want to blow up you’ve come so far. I was kind of panicking. I felt so good I thought it was a fluke. So I stayed for too long. Finally I told myself what are you doing!?!? Get going! So I asked to pass and took off. I kept passing people. I had someone tell me hey you’re going really fast!!! Are you sure you're feeling ok? (It was getting really hot at this point, 70’s) I said yes I feel great! They cheered me on! Each aid station had amazing volunteers and I cannot tell you how much their cheers help! I continued to try and catch people. I started having water poured into my mouth (I didn’t have a cup) and ice in my fandana to help with the heat. Plain water was tasting so good at that point. I also began grabbing orange slices.

I hit the last aid station feeling great! So much so that I neglected to check my water bladder. It was empty. You might not think that is a big deal, but it really is. In that heat with miles to go, you need it. I let myself have an “uh oh” moment and then moved on. Those last few miles were tough. I felt pretty dehydrated and very nauseous, but I kept pushing. I fell twice because I got a bit sloppy at watching my footing, and then rolled my ankle pretty bad. I noticed that not one person was around me still. I ran alone for a lot of the race. After limping a bit I pressed on and started running, only to hear footsteps behind me coming fast, I moved over and it was Jeff Browning. LOL! He was cruising, but made sure to take the time to tell me to keep pushing! So I did! I ran all the way into the finish! I had no idea if I was even in the top 10, so when I crossed the line and Shalini the RD told me I was 3rd female I was in complete shock!!! It was like a dream.

From one year ago breaking my foot, to now taking 3rd was crazy. It was a huge confidence boost to know that my foot could handle the distance and that I was able to have a podium finish with as little training as I did. I felt so blessed and humbled. A new memory to replace the old. A realization that I can do this! A thankful heart to have been able to run this race and finish. A grateful heart for all of the support and new friends that I made at this event. Thankful to the Lord for the gift of running.

Now that I know I can handle distance again, I am going to find my next race and really train for it. I am so excited and hopeful for the future. I cannot wait to see what happens!!!

Huge thank you to all the volunteers, the RD Shalini, my mother, and all of you who commented and supported me through this journey. Big thank you also to Road Runner Sports, Altra Running, Jaybird Sport, OS1st, Yukon Charlies, and Momentum Jewelry for your awesome support and gear to get me through!

Gear: Altra Running King MT 1.5 and gaiters Road Runner Sports R-Gear Recharge Compression Capri Altra running performance tank Garmin Fenix 5 Os1st Arm Sleeves Injinji trail crew socks Ultimate Direction Race Vesta with bladder not front bottles

Fuel: MUIR energy gels Ultima electrolyte replenisher Salt stick KION essential amino acids

Balm: Squirrel’s Nut Butter

Pic Cred IG accounts: Trail @mile90photo, Finish @alex.fagin