#callahan:max003

[ofviolentdeath]

@neonbitemarks

It had taken some time and more than a little coaxing from the family to get Cal to even come home, but it had taken far longer for him to be able to face Max. In truth, he was still terrified of the response he was going to get but he knew the longer he waited, the worse it would be.

"Hey..." he muttered, hovering in the doorway as if waiting to be told to fuck off.

[ofviolentdeath]

Cal was quiet for a moment, letting the weight of that sink in. He doubted Blaise would ever be gone for good, but he wasn't going to say it like that, not when Max was clearly still struggling.

"Can you promise me something?" he finally asked, needing some sort of assurance that he wasn't going to have to go through all of this again. Not when he already had his own issues to deal with. Not when he was finally working towards being in a better place and letting his family actually be his family.

"Can you promise me that, even if he does ever get out, you won't go back to him?"

"I know..."

It hurt his heart to know just how much he'd scared Cal, even unintentionally.

Especially unintentionally.

If Max was honest with himself, for a moment there, he had almost gotten too close to the edge and that scared him the most because he wasn't even aware of it at the time, but now he was back on his meds and out of the hospital, he saw all the damage he'd done in trying to fight a futile battle to save his brother.

"Blaise won't be a problem anymore. I don't even know where he is right now, but Mom and Dad say he's probably not gettin' out any time in the foreseeable future," he explained, wanting Cal to at least have the peace of mind that the main triggering factor of Max's breakdown was out of the picture, and possibly permanently.

"I just hope I didn't fuck things up so bad that I lost you in the process."

[ofviolentdeath]

"I was terrified I was going to lose you entirely, Max. The way you were talking..."

Cal trailed off and shook his head, the memory of it painful enough that he still woke up in a cold sweat when the memory crept into his dreams. He had been terrified that Max was going to end up dead because of Blaise's bullshit and it didn't matter to him if Max's brother was mentally unstable, not when it nearly cost him Max.

"I was so fucking scared I would never see you again."

"I'm sorry that I put you in that situation. I fucked up. Bad, and I know that you only did what you had to because I was a danger to myself. I don't blame you for that." Max's memory of that night was still spotty at best due to how bad his mental state had been at the time, but he knew that Cal had acted out of care and an attempt to protect him from himself when he was out of his mind and not even remotely lucid.

"I'm so fucking sorry, Cal," he apologised again, getting a little tearful. "I didn't mean to make such a mess of everything, especially between us."

[ofviolentdeath]

"That's not funny, Max. I hate that I did that to you, hated being put in a situation where it was necessary. I was terrified that you were going to get yourself killed."

Emotional moments were not something Callahan was great with and, while he could joke about things regarding himself on some level, it wasn't his go-to.

"...I missed you too."

The awkwardness didn't go unnoticed, but Max understood why they both felt it, given everything that had happened and how long he'd been away for because of it.

"Better than last time?"

It was a small attempt at humor to try to get them both to relax, though it was also an acknowledgement on Max's part that he felt awful about what had happened.

"Sorry you had to see me like that," he murmured, the subject clearly still a sensitive topic.

"I missed you."

[ofviolentdeath]

"You uh, you look good," he muttered, hating how fucking awkward all of this felt.

He wanted to apologize, to beg Max to forgive him for literally drugging him and getting Leon involved but there were no words that felt right, nothing felt like it would be enough to make up for that.

Hell, the only reason Cal had shown up at all was Torrie had called him. He's home and I think it would be good for him to see you. The words played over and over in his head and he still wasn't sure about that.

"Hey..."

It had been months since they'd seen each other, and the last time hadn't exactly been under the best circumstances, what with Max having suffered a mental breakdown and Cal resorting to having to drug him so that Max's dad could come pick him up and get him somewhere safe.

Sure, the moment was awkward and tense, but if there was one person Max wanted to see right now, it was the one standing on his doorstep.