#call me ritsuko

[getinthefuckingrobotshinji]

I am part of a robotics team (bc of course I am) and I made an NGE themed reel for our time at this year's German championship. (Spoiler: we got second place!), also check out our YouTube where I also edit all our videos (link below)

[autistic-ben-tennyson]

In Defense of Shinji/Rei

Out of all the pairings in the Evangelion fandom, Shinji/Rei is one of the most controversial and least popular, especially here on tumblr. It did have some popularity at one point but that has died down in favor of Kawoshin and Asurei. It’s a ship that I, and many others, feel is often mischaracterized and dismissed due to its more controversial elements but one that is honestly very emotional and deserves less hate in my opinion, as do it’s shippers who people also have a misguided view of. Fandom in general has become more moralistic and puritanical in recent years. It’s like no one learned a thing from the SU fandom discourse where people were bullied or called homophobic for liking a certain pairing over the other.

Argument 1: she’s his mother/sister

The most common criticism of the pairing is that it’s incest and that their relationship is that of a brother-sister or mother-son. First, Rei’s whole arc in the show is that she’s not just a clone or copy of Yui or Lilith. She’s her own person with her own desires which is why her loyalty to Gendo wanes as she becomes more of an individual. Her DNA also isn’t that similar to Shinji and only a small amount of Yui’s was used. The rest was affected by Lilith hence the differences in their appearance. So there is a little bit of blood relation but it’s not on the same level of say Bwen or Pinecest. Incest is terrible because it’s a betrayal of family trust and abuse but Shinji and Rei met as teens and were not raised as siblings, nor did he know of her origin until Ritsuko explained it.

I’ve also seen the argument that their bond is sibling-like or Shinji views her as a Madonna/mother figure. Anno has stated that he intended there to be a “love triangle” with the pilot trio and show’s proposal described Rei as having “learned about feelings when she fell in love”. While that info comes from Reddit and may not be reliable, it does challenge the idea that there was no intention for their dynamic to be romantic.

Next, antis really take that elevator scene out of context where Shinji was complimenting her on being like a mom while ignoring him telling her she’d make a good housewife. The rebuilds and manga make their connection more blatant but it was always there. Misato, Toji and Kensuke all tease Shinji about his crush and the two act as friends after warming up despite their icy first interactions. There may be some maternal aspects to it but it’s rather simplistic to dumb their bond down to a family connection. It seems antis argue that they’re siblings because the romantic implications are uncomfortable and antis don’t want to admit that they do have feelings for each other.

Argument 2: it’s misogynistic and queer erasure

Okay, this is a less common argument against it but one I’ve seen from popular Eva analysis writers that view Kawoshin as the only valid pairing for Shinji. I’ve seen it used against Asushin and Marishin too. This goes hand and hand with the idea that Shinji views Rei as a Madonna and is misogynistic. I have a lot of thoughts about the “Shinji is an incel misogynist and Asuka did nothing wrong” discourse but that’s for another day. He’s not a perfect uwu soft boy but fans seem to base his entire characterization off the hospital scene in rather single issue Eva analyses that cherry-pick certain scenes or dialogue.

The argument that it’s queer erasure is one I’m starting to despise. Yes, there are homophobic dudebro fans who hate Kawoshin but not everyone who prefers a “straight” pairing is anti gay. Shinji could still be bisexual and be in a m/f relationship. I’ve also seen some ship him in a polycule with Rei and Kaworu. Plus, not everyone has to interpret the show or character the same way. The writers made it so people can view Kawoshin as romantic and Shinji as queer, but never demanded that be the only possible interpretation.

This kind reminds me of something I’ve occasionally seen in the Ben 10 fandom too. A few fans, not all of them, treating the wholesome gay ship as the only good pairing because of the problematic elements in the m/f ships or because they view the male protagonist as a misogynist. The “male character is sexist or a bad boyfriend so let’s make him gay” is also a fandom trope that kind of irritates me. Not every ship has be gay or a girlboss romance either.

Argument 3: they’re kids and you can’t ship them

This is one of the least common criticisms but one that I’ve occasionally encountered. First, they’re 14 which is around the time a lot of teens start dating. Second, romance =/= sex and child/teen characters can have romantic feelings for each other. Yes, ship wars over fictional kids can escalate but there’s nothing wrong with just liking a pairing. This post about Chihiro and Haku’s bond from Spirited Away kind of applies here too.

My thoughts: why do I love this pairing?

I first fell in love with this ship because I watched the rebuilds first on Amazon Prime and didn’t know the series was on Netflix because my account, embarrassingly, still has parental controls on it. I know they’re not everyone’s cup of tea but I liked them. Shinji was a character I really connected to and so was Rei. Their relationship got me a bit emotional and the scene where Shinji attempts to save her had me on the edge of my seat, while the scene where Shinji accepts Rei Q got a tear out of me as did the apology scene in 3.0+1.0.

If I had to compare them to any other pairing, which I’ve done before, it would be Hodaka/Hina from Weathering with You which also is a bit divisive and a bit of a tearjerker. Ironically, EoE is one of Makoto Shinkai’s favorites and he considers Anno an inspiration. Everything from their bond to Hodaka’s character and Hina’s arc of a blue haired girl, blackish-blue in Hina’s case, that’s lived a difficult life and who’s only purpose is to be a sacrificial lamb, learning to pray for herself is a lot like Shinji/Rei, down the ending of WWY being a lot like that of 2.22. The scene where Hodaka gives Hina a promise ring is also a little like the “smile” moment from Episode 6/1.11.

Conclusion

In short, Shinji/Rei isn’t a bad pairing and is overhated and misrepresented by many in the fandom. It’s fine to dislike it or prefer another ship but one can do so without chomping at the bit to paint its shippers as homophobes, misogynists or people with incest fetishes or Oedipal complexes. Many of us like it because it’s one of the least toxic relationships in the series and is honestly a very powerful story. Are there some questionable elements in it? Sure, but you can like a ship even if it’s not up to golden moral standards and expecting every pairing to be unproblematic is ridiculous. Real life is much more grey than what moralistic fans claim.

[karizard-ao3]

It's October, which means Oktoberfest! Can I please ask for any ideas about the NGE characters going?!

Oh boy, I have never been to Oktoberfest, so you'll have to forgive me if this is way too off base!

Okay, so Asuka is super excited for Oktoberfest. She has her dirndl all ready to go and she hasn't eaten all morning so she can stuff herself on German food.

Asuka instructed Shinji to show up in traditional dress. She meant lederhosen but he arrives in a yukata instead. Even though he thinks it's a bit weird to wear to a festival in October, he figured that was what she meant. They get in a fight, then Shinji gets some lederhosen at a stall and changes and all is well.

Rei goes in her school uniform. She has been researching German culture in preparation for the festival and joins a traditional dance competition, which she does not win. She is simply happy to have participated.

Misato chugs beer until she can't see straight and Kaji has to babysit her, which is what he expected already when he agreed to go. Ritsuko sits with him and makes digs at Misato for being an alcoholic.

Toji and Kensuke are there for one reason and one reason only: to try to get some beer. They don't have fake IDs or anything, so they come up with all these ridiculous plans to try to get a stein each. Hikari is hanging out with them because she likes Toji and Asuka is busy flirting fighting with Shinji. She keeps trying to get them to stop their dumb attempts but they ignore her. I think in the end, they end up just drinking from some cups people left out. Hikari calls them gross and leaves. They, despite only having a few sips each, are convinced they have become drunk and get all excited.

[virtualstarrr]

Revolutionary Girl Utena and Neon Genesis Evangelion: Parallels Between Characters and Their Relationships

PREFACE: I wrote this a few years ago and never published it; I was around 15 and I don't think everything I said was entirely accurate, however I do feel like I made connections between these two shows that I haven't seen many talk about, so I'm gonna post it. If anything I say is off, feel free to correct me!

Anyway:

Something I've realized while rewatching Neon Genesis Evangelion is how similar Rei and Gendo's dynamic is to Akio and Anthy's in Revolutionary Girl Utena. Here are some characters and dynamics that I thought were similar, most of them revolving around the characters' connections to Anthy or Rei:

Asuka and Nanami as Antagonists

Anthy and Rei both have very quiet personalities. Both are stoic and appear off-putting to others around them. The characters Asuka and Nanami similarly hold disdain for Rei/Anthy and berate them for being weird.

Nanami harbors jealousy towards Anthy after seeing her in a relationship with her brother. Even though she resents her, the two are both in similar incestuous relationships. Anthy's situation could be a reflection of what could happen to Nanami if she took her relationship with Toga too far. But luckily Nanami realizes that she never really had feelings for her brother, and that she just wanted his validation. But before Nanami realizes all that, she acts as an antagonist to Anthy. She's constantly bullying her, and calling her out for her "weird" behavior. Asuka is similar with Rei. She's not necessarily jealous of Rei but she does project her insecurities on Rei, just look at the elevator scene. She calls Rei a doll for being subservient to Gendo, but she herself is afraid of becoming one. Nanami and Asuka, on the surface, couldn't be any more different than Anthy and Rei, but in reality Anthy and Rei represent a lot of the Nanami and Asuka's insecurities, or reflect the situations they're in.

Gendo and Akio, Both Abusers

Anthy and Rei are both extremely loyal to Akio and Gendo. Throughout each series, they are used to attain Akio/Gendo's goals, with Gendo's being to reunite with Yui and Akio's to maintain power over everyone in Ohtori. Because of how reliant Gendo and Akio's plans are on Rei/Anthy, they both get to know a lot about what's going on behind the scenes in the story, where other characters may not.

Akio and Gendo are very similar to each other, too.

Akio is able to manipulate people using sex. He even sexually assaults Anthy. Anthy endures Akio's abuse for so long that she's scared of leaving him; what if she escapes and finds that the world outside Ohtori is even more cruel?

Like Akio, Gendo also uses sex to control the women around him. He takes advantage of both Akagi and Ritsuko, disposing of them when he no longer needs them, just like Rei fears he will do to her when her use runs out.

Rei exists to obey Gendo. She's a clone, made to serve his desires. Rei wants to leave Gendo, she wants to die but he needs her to achieve Human Instrumentality. All she knows is to be obedient to Gendo, so she continues to follow his orders without considering her own feelings.

Anthy and Rei are cursed to serve Akio and Gendo, and though both dislike their situations, they see no hope of escaping. Not until Utena and Shinji step into their lives.

Utena and Shinji, the Protagonists

Utena spends the whole series selfishly playing the role of the prince, but once she begins to understand Anthy's situation, she is able to give up princehood and inspire Anthy to leave Akio. Utena doesn't save Anthy, but she gives her the courage to leave her situation, to decide for herself that she wants to leave.

Shinji shows interest in Rei's feelings. He encourages her to express herself, and tells her to smile. While Gendo sees Rei as a disposable clone, Shinji cares about her in a way Gendo never did. He wants her to be happy. While Shinji's motives are still selfish (with Shinji failing to understand Rei, just as Utena still treats Anthy as an object in her attempt to "save her" through the duels), he still shows more concern for her than she's ever experienced from anyone else.

[The scene where Shinji tells Rei to smile visually reminds me of RGU's finale. Shinji looks down on Rei, just as Utena does Anthy. Shinji tries to pull Rei out of the entry plug (the duty she's bound to— being a pilot, being Gendo's servant), as Utena tries to pull Anthy out of her coffin (trapped with Akio, the revolving system of capitalism and patriarchy, as well as literally being stuck in the cycle of abuse).]

Rei chooses to sacrifice herself, and after her death is replaced by her clone Rei 3. Rei 3 carries Rei 2's emotions but doesn't understand them at first. In the End of Evangelion, when Gendo tries to use Rei to start the Third Impact, she rejects him and chooses to start the Third Impact on her own will. (Possibly because of Shinji's influence).

Gendo and Akio Again

I think the similarities in these scenes are interesting.

Gendo stands over Rei as Akio stands over Anthy— each man exerting power over these girls. Gendo reaches down to grope Rei, trying to control her, and Anthy reaches up towards Akio to comfort him; Akio is using his emotions to manipulate and maintain his control over Anthy.

The lighting in these shots is similar. I don't know how either Anno or Ikuhara meant for the colors used in these scenes to be interpreted. I can only give my interpretation. Red is predominant, especially in the shot from Evangelion. A color that can represent passion. Perhaps this is Gendo's passion for power, for Yui, for eternity? Love and romance are often represented by red, and that includes lust. The red background could show Gendo's lust for Yui— literally in the sense that he's attracted to her as her partner— but most importantly, in the sense that he lusts after her, he desires to return to her. This lust extends to Rei, Gendo's recreation of Yui as well as a vehicle to which he can use to reunite with Yui. [Note: it's implied that Gendo sexually abused Rei, which isn't surprising considering she's a clone of Yui and the way he uses sex to control and manipulate. In the scene pictured above, he gropes Rei's breast— this is right before Rei rejects Gendo and takes the form of Lilith.]

Not only does red represent lust, but also power. It's a bold color, dominating both of these shots. It contributes to the sense of control Gendo and Akio have over Rei and Anthy. Red is used in this context often in Utena. The character Touga manipulates the girls around him in a similar fashion as Akio and Gendo (while also being manipulated by Akio). He manipulates Utena and his sister Nanami, taking advantage of their affection for him (both girls later realizing they never felt for Touga romantically). And Touga's red hair color, like other characters in Utena, signifies this power he holds.

In the RGU shot, red mainly covers Akio. Yellow is also prominent, centering around Anthy. Yellow is most often associated with Nanami in Utena, who represents jealousy— as I mentioned earlier, in her relationship with Anthy—, as well as Nanami's innocence, and perhaps ignorance.

Akio holds control over his Anthy, his victim. Her innocence is highlighted in this scene— she's not ignorant to what's going on, nor is she innocent in that sense. She's informed of and contributes to Akio's system. However, she finds herself trapped in this system, making her Akio's victim. In this sense the innocence in her attempt to comfort him contrasts his desire for power. He knows what he's doing. He cries fake tears. In the climax of RGU, Akio weaponizes his emotions in an attempt to get Anthy to stay. The colors emphasize Akio's power and Anthy's lack of agency in comparison.

Akio is trying to maintain his power over Anthy through these false tears.

Conclusion

Ultimately Gendo and Akio fail to maintain their control. Anthy breaks out of Akio's system, and Rei becomes Lilith on her own accord. It doesn't completely end their goals. Akio's system is still maintained for the rest who chose not to leave, and Gendo is able to reunite with Yui during the Third Impact— even if it is a false perception of her. But their initial plans fall apart, and the characters they've been attempting to manipulate are eventually able to escape. This doesn't just apply to Rei and Anthy, but also the other protagonists— the pilots whom Nerv abuses for their goals, and Utena and any of the other characters who find the courage to leave Ohtori. Evangelion focuses on Shinji's monologue primarily, but the show's message inspires the audience, and by extension the other characters, to live a fulfilling life despite everything. Utena and Anthy both escape Ohtori, but the possibility is there for any of the other characters that question Ohtori (a larger representation of abuse, capitalism, patriarchy, and systems that bind us) to escape as well. Ultimately these characters, these people, these systems don't have as much control as they project onto others. They influence so many aspects of life, but it's not impossible to defy them.

Ok, I've just been incoherently rambling so maybe this post has no point, but hopefully it makes SOME sense. Maybe, maybe you can see what I mean by all of (or at least any of) this. Sorry if this makes zero sense and means nothing. That is, if anyone does see this. But hopefully some enjoy my ramblings

[mss-pit]

some bravern translation snippets from magazine interviews (animage april 2024)

Translated some short comments on Bravern's character designs by KamoKamen and Motomura Kouchi from Animage 2024 April issue + some interview snippets.

Kamokamen is the original character designer and Motomura is series chief animation director and animation character designer (i.e. the one who adapts the original designs to animation)

Isami Ao:

Keigo Koyanagi (series composition) told me to give him a face that is made for bullying (lol). His request was to give him a face that starts out as cool-looking but is fun to watch crumble little by little. - kamokamen

In the early key visual you see him standing behind Smith, and before the series started people said he seemed like the kind of character who would die right away (lol). Who would have thought he'd become this well liked! - motomura

Lewis Smith: His design was pretty much decided on straight away without much hesitation. Compared to Isami's slim and small physique, he has a sturdy build that matches the common image of an American soldier. - kamokamen

We intentionally tried to give him good looks as contrast to Isami. In addition, all the male characters were to have their muscles emphasised, so I suggested names of pro wrestlers to use as model reference. - motomura

Hibiki and Miyu: I didn't know how to start designing them at first because their personalities and backgrounds weren't decided on early. At first Koyanagi-san adviced me "start by drawing however you like. Then look at their designs and try picturing how they will move and act". I designed them somewhat based on the two policewoman protagonists from a certain anime I love. (*probably You're Under Arrest) - kamokamen

Karen and Nina:

At first it wasn't Nina, but Karen who had droopy eyes. Then I was told she was like a certain female commanding staff from a certain famous anime (*probably Ritsuko from Evangelion), so she ended up with her current design. At first I was told Nina is British, so I thought she must drink whiskey, and Nina who is American loves bourbon and drew them picturing that. After that, they made my ideas of their favorite drinks official. - kamokamen

Snippets of interview with KamoKamen from the same issue:

"Please tell us which characters you were in charge of designing." The seven characters Isami, Smith, Lulu, Miyu, Hibiki, Karen and Nina. Except for Lulu, all characters were paired to be opposites of each other: Smith and Isami, Miyu and Hibiki, Karen and Nina. They were mainly created through back and forth with Takenaka (executive producer) and requests, or less requests and more approval of everything I did by series director Obari. It was to the point where I thought "is this really okay?" […]

"When designing the characters, was there anything that left a lasting impression on you?" Actually, Isami's design. It was the most difficult. I got a request to redesign his facial features from scratch. He was originally drawn with bigger eyes, and slightly longer hair, looking something like a protagonist from the Yuusha series. Picture something like Captain Ryuuji Satake as a high shooler or closer to Hibiki's age looks-wise when placed next to her. From that base we changed his design, and ended up with what people now call his "background character(mob)"-like facial design (lol) . […] "You were allowed to add a suprising number of your own ideas". That is correct. For Smith's 'tricolor' shirt, I thought of what type of clothes he would wear and drew it half as a joke (lol). I didn't think it would end up in the show itself, so I was happy. […]

[duhragonball]

So now that you've finished the Eva TV series, is there any character in the cast who you'd call a favorite?

Misato Katsuragi, easily.

It took me a while to realize it, but in a cast full of traumatized children, amoral scientists, and big-rigged mahoneys, she's the only one who really feels like a hero in an sci-fi adventure story. She supports her team, taking charge and boosting morale wherever she can. She never despairs in the face of danger. She takes responsibility for the kids when no one else will, and she doesn't just shrug and accept NERV's bullshit as a "necessary evil".

Oh, and she's constantly struggling to find out what the hell is going on in this show. She asks questions, gets answers, and follows up on Kaji's investigation after he dies. It's not clear that she was looking to betray NERV; she just wanted to know all the facts so that she could do the right thing as effectively as possible.

I think the only negative for the character is this fan theory I found on one of the wikis that suggests she was going to have sex with Shinji to console him after the apparent death of Rei in Episode 23, which I find ridiculous. The reasoning seems to be based on the way Misato is regarded as some sort of nymphomaniac, and so that's her default way of dealing with loneliness and grief, and... no, that's stupid.

Both endings of NGE seem determined to assert that Misato is some sort of sex addict, and that this is a terrible character flaw. Meanwhile, the only person we know she's had sex with is Kaji. They dated in 2007, and then they got back together over the course of the show. I despise Kaji and his punchable face, but I don't think having sex with him is some sort of crime. It's not like she was cheating on someone else while she was doing it.

Evangelion seems determined to demonize Misato for being too sexy, which is pretty rich considering she seems pretty monogamous and professional throughout. Meanwhile, the rest of Evangelion seems obsessed with the idea of putting teenagers in suggestive poses and minimal clothing.

For a time, I considered using this ask to make a whole list of characters I liked, but no, Misato is too far ahead of the others to bother with runners-up. I can appreciate Shinji, Asuka, and Rei as protagonists, but they're so friggin' childish that it gets on my nerves. You can't even get that mad at them, because they're children.

I liked Ritsuko, but her character arc is almost nonexistent. She mostly typed a lot and ran tests, and then she finally got pushed too far and turned on Gendo and... it didn't really affect anything.

Gendo Ikari is pretty fascinating, and I suspect he may be the model of this trend I've seen in American comic books, where fans and writers act like Batman, Professor X, and Mister Fantastic are actually ruthless, manipulative monsters instead of well-meaning hero types. Blame it on pop culture's intolerance for nuance, but I suspect that Evangelion came along and people started to try to fit their favorite characters into Gendo-shaped holes. It's refreshing to see the real thing, though. But he's still kind of a dick.

The unseen gunman who murdered Kaji is pretty cool, I suppose.

[cacaitos]

and like, the reason i separate them form characters like nanami, rei asaka and ayanami, ritsuko? (i dont have any other in mind rn sorry), is that the kind of character im reffering to has to be given at least an illusion of choice that incentivices their active cooperation, even if, in nature, they are all part of systems and relationships that grow on hierachy and power imbalances. i mention by proximity and similitude to those others i mentioned before, but notice how a good chunk of these's relationships are related to a family unit, and it for the case illustrates a set of relationships wildly known and fundamentally built in their inescapability (in abuse and in harmony, 'family will always be family') or in the privileges something like age and noticeable age gaps (young siblings obey the elder, and the elder the parents and so on, because each is given an amount of power over the other that's socially acceptable). again im just using family as an example, not necessarily my point of interest, but set it against casca, that felt she found significance in a world that deemed her existence irrelevant through trying to feel special/useful to someone (or a group too), cair's full realization and independent goal without ghost, or soujiro partaking in shishio's philosopy to avoid getting his ego destroyed (ahem dying). again purely coincidential that like half of them are rejecting, abandoning or were forced to, their family and the dynamics mentioned above lol.

but like, they gotta be petty and insuferable about it, like el perro del hortelano.

[sjsnowyowl]

Late Night Rambling about Music: Ritsuko Okazaki

So recently I’ve been working on restoring a radio show from 1993 by a late Japanese singer-songwriter named Ritsuko Okazaki. She has worked on the very first opening of Fruits Basket, Princess Tutu, and Say I Love You. Apart from those, most of her other songs aren’t really well known, though she has worked with some well-known singers.

Okazaki used to be a songwriter before her debut in 1993, where she composed for a handful of projects. She’s worked in titles such as Minky Momo, Love Hina (along with Megumi Hayashibara), Wedding Peach, and a visual novel called Symphonic Rain. Later, she also formed a duo with Megumi Hinata (known for Cardcaptor Sakura’s first OP) in a band called Melocure.

I first came across Okazaki’s music about two years ago as I was looking for the Fruits Basket opening on Spotify. It wasn’t until around that time when I finally found it. I saw that she had more songs apart from her more popular anime works, so I decided to give her a listen. After listening to her songs, I fell in love with her lovely compositions and lyrics. Most of her songs are either love songs or feel-good songs. Some of her songs have very beautiful messages (like the Furuba opening). Overall, it became comfort music to me.

Sadly, she passed away in 2004 due to septic shock and stomach cancer, where she had many unfinished projects and songs. Her final album came out a year later, which were her songs for her fan-club members only at the time.

When the time comes and I finish, I would love to share her radio show, as well as some covers of her songs here and on YouTube. They have had a huge impact on me both musically and emotionally. Her voice is also quite nice and relaxing to listen to. You can find another video of her radio show here if y’all want to hear her speak (it is not translated to English tho). You can hear some songs that also have had an influence on her style :)

If anyone does see this post and is interested in listening to her music, this is the link to her Spotify. :)

[aoyama-division]

The Hegemony Wedding Ceremony (Jet Set Trio Voicelines Ver.)

— Tomi

"...You know, when my younger brother mentioned he had already gotten married, I... I kinda envied him a bit. I always dreamed of being able to have my own wedding, but... I kept telling myself that I don't think I would ever find a woman that I would want to spend my life with. My brother would tell me that I just had to keep searching. Eventually, I got so tired of it that I wanted to quit. But... I'm glad that I didn't. Cause if I had, I'd have never found Miho-san. I am... really grateful for that."

(To Karada) "Karada. I won't ask how you managed to get Luis, of all people, to attend my wedding. When I asked, he swore up and down that he wouldn't come. But... maybe he felt if it came from you, it would be better. I don't know. Anyway, thank you for convincing him to come. Thank you for being here. And... thank you for being one of the few people I can call a friend."

(To Luis) "Kōkyū. ...I won't ask why you chose to deny my invitation, but accepted Karada's. Perhaps, you felt it would be better if it came from him? Well, regardless, thank you for showing up. And thanks for not putting your squabbles with my wife off to the side for just one day. ...Oh, and thank you also for the wonderous wedding cake. Your skill at cooking never ceases to amaze me."

(To Ritsuko) "...Okada-san. I won't ask how you managed to infiltrate this event, so I'll chalk it up due to you being my darling wife's closest confidant. ...You need not threaten me to prove your point, Okada-san. The last thing I'd ever want is to hurt Miho-san. I'd sooner hurt myself than do anything that would inflict harm upon her. Now, if you're quite done being dramatic..."

(To Sumire) "...I'm not even going to pretend that I'm happy to see you here. You don't care for me, and you know I don't care for you, you menace to society. It's only because you are my darling wife's niece that I'm allowing you to stay here. But rest assured, if anything goes out of place here and I get even the slight feeling that you are involved in some form or manner, I won't hesitate to have security throw you out. Now then, if you'll excuse me, I do not wish to be in your presence any longer than I have to."

(To Miho) "You look as beautiful as the day I first laid eyes on you, my queen. I know I said this before, but… a man could spend a lifetime searching for a good thing, and he could never find it. Either because he wasn't looking hard enough, or because he wasn't paying attention. …Fortunately for me, my eyes were open when I laid sight on you, my beautiful wife. Words can't express how I feel about you, and how happy I am that you will be in my life. So... thank you, my queen, and my love."

— Karada

"Man, Tomi and Miho-san sure went all out for this wedding! I guess it's no surprise considering their two of the richest people in Japan. But man, would you look at this place? I haven't been to too many weddings before, but... wow! ...Oh, they got those little hot dog wieners in a toasted bun! ...And a chocolate fountain?! Man, they hooked this place up!"

(To Tomi) "Hey, Tomi! Congratulations again, man! I'm really happy for you! You and Miho-san are gonna make a good couple, I know it! ...Ha, don't mention it! I know what to say to Lu to get him to relent, so don't you worry! ...Aw, Tomi, man. You're gonna make me cry, dude. Today's your big day, not mine! ...But thanks, man. I'm glad you're my friend, too."

(To Luis) "Man, Lu! Sick wedding, don't you think? Miho and Tomi really made this place their own! ...Aw, come on, Lu! You can't at least, pretend, to be happy for the two of them? This is their big day, man! ...Look, I asked you to come because, believe it or not, Tomi was really nervous about this, man. I figured, what better way to show his support than having his two best bros by his side to help him. So... can you just show your support for him, this once? Please? ...Great! Thanks a lot, Lu!"

(To Ritsuko) "Ritsuko! How are..." *Looks at the spider in her hand, and screams out loud, running away from her*

(To Sumire) "Sumire! Surprised to see... oh, uhh... okay. I'll... I'll just leave you alone then. Sorry... Small-dick? Yeah right. Bet the closest someone like her has seen a penis is through a T.V. screen or something..."

(To Miho) "Hey, it's the Lady of the Hour, herself! Congratulations, Miho-san! I'm really happy for you and Tomi, both! I hope you both make each other really happy! Well, I don't want to take up too much of your time, so I'll get. But congratulations again!"

— Luis

*Inhales some nicotine from a cigarette before exhaling* "Seriously, why did Karada have to drag me here to this? Not that I'm not happy for the "happy couple", but there are plenty of other things I could be doing right now. Plus, and this is probably just because of my homelife, but I don't see the point in weddings, exchanging vows. I mean, I know there's an order to everything, but what's the point? I don't want to say Tomi and Miho are anything like my parents, but... well, I'll just leave it at that."

(To Tomi) "...Chōten. ...You can ask why I denied your invitation. I can't guarantee you'll get a reply, or at least one that you'll like, though. ...Your welcome, I guess. ...Yeah, you have Karada to thank for that cake. If not for him begging me, I wouldn't have made it. But don't worry, I'll send you an invoice for it later."

(To Karada) "Hey Karada. ...Yeah, whatever you say. ...What do you mean? I am happy for them. ...What do you want me to do? Jump up and down, yelling, 'Congratulations, Tomi and Miho! May you have a long and healthy life together!'? *Sighs* ...Fine, okay. I'll deign to be more approachable, but that's all you're getting out of me. ...Yeah, sure."

(To Ritsuko) "...Okada-san. ...Glad you enjoyed it. I'll try to remember to send you the recipe for your birthday next year."

(To Sumire) "Hey, Sumire. ...Meh, she's still not one of my favorite people, but... well, I promised I'd be courteous on her special day, so... yeah. ...Ha, Tomi? Blackmail me? He can certainly try. ...Yeah, good to see you too. Later."

(To Miho) "...Kobayashi. ...Yeah, glad you liked it, I guess. ...And congratulations and all that."

[shinagawa-division]

The Hegemony Wedding Ceremony (CodeX Voicelines Ver.)

— Miho

“It’s finally happening, I honestly can’t believe that the day is here. Am I nervous? A tad but I am absolutely confident that this won’t end like the last engagement. But honestly I’m more worried about the ceremony than anything, I don’t know why but I feel like something bad is going to happen which cannot be true, everything has to be absolutely perfect! I’ll have to get more security to keep an extra eye on Sumire.”

(To Ritsuko) “Ritsuko! Don’t you look lovely, I’m so glad you actually decided to show up considering that you’re quite literally my maid of honor. Come now, at least try to look happy for me, but I’m serious, thank you for being here for me, you’ve always been like a sister for me, especially when my own family can’t be here.”

(To Sumire) “Honestly, I don’t know why I still decided to let you step foot in this venue after what you did but…even after everything, despite all the fights and arguing…we’re still family, Sumire, like it or not, the truth is that we’re all we literally have left for each other, we are the last of our family and that’s terrifying. I genuinely, absolutely love Tomi but I’m also doing this to secure the future of our bloodline, I hope…I hope that you understand someday.”

(To Luis) “Kōkyū-san…I wanted to thank you for providing our wedding cake and…thanks for attending.”

(To Karada) “Oh…Kessaku-san…how…lovely to see you, yes, thank you for compliments and wishes, I do hope you enjoy yourself today.”

(To Tomi) “Is it bad to say that I am still in shock? Haha, but truly I could not be happier than I am now, who would’ve thought that the charming young man that I met at his parents’ soirée would become my future husband? Life has a strange way of putting things together but I can say with absolute certainty that I do not regret a single thing, especially because it leads us to now. Tomi Chōten, my dearest, my King, you are the love of my life and I cannot imagine being without you, it is my greatest honor to become your wife and I promise to be there for you always, through highs and lows until death do us part, I love you.”

— Ritsuko

“Miho better thank her lucky stars that I have such a soft spot for her, I find weddings to be quite irritating as they are nothing but over exaggerated pageants and we’ve already had enough of those. But still, this is the only wedding that I will have minimum grievances with, Miho deserves this and who am I to stop her from finally achieving happiness after all she’s been through.”

(To Miho) “I’d be rather hard pressed to find anyone else who would even try to steal the spotlight from you, you look absolutely stunning Miho, hard to believe that Tomi Chōten of all people will be officially able to call you his. Putting that aside, I’m happy for you, truly, I am attempting to smile from the inside. Is that enough sentimentality for you? Yes? Good, now let’s finally get this over with.”

(To Sumire) “Goodness Sumire, dare I say that you look more devoid of emotion than I do, while I understand how positively infuriating this must be for you, I do think you should focus on the bigger picture, that being that Miho has constantly been put through the ringer from the time of your disappearance to even now. The world has tried again and again to beat her down yet she came out on top even stronger than before, what I’m trying to say is that whatever you’re thinking about this is simply not true, Miho is not marrying Tomi simply just to spite you or anything of the sort, even I can see that she is sickeningly in love with him and that she is just simply taking the chance to be happy, to do what she wants to do for herself for once. Just something to think about, I’ll see you on alter.”

(To Luis) “Greetings Kōkyū. At least the one good thing from this is the cake you’ve made.”

(To Karada) “…” *shows him a spider to get him to leave her alone*

(To Tomi) “Chōten, before we proceed to the main event, I just wanted to have a word with you. Miho is absolutely excited and is very looking forward to become Mrs. Miho Chōten, I figured I’d let you know and to also remind you that should you ever hard Miho either physically, mentally, emotionally, or psychologically, I will make sure that you will regret the day that you ever came to existence, Sumire’s little aggressions will look like absolute child’s play compared to what I am capable of and no one, not your wealth, your prestige, or even your mother will be able to save you. Have I made myself clear? Good.”

— Sumire

“So many happy faces and yet I feel absolutely nothing, not even anger funny enough, I don’t know, maybe my subconscious knows that this is it, there’s nothing I can honestly do to actually put a stop to this, Miho’s determined to see this through and I fucking hate hate hate to see how genuinely happy Chōten is. No, no, fuck that, screw this and screw them, I’m not done yet, if they think that they’re coming out of this unscathed then they got another fucking thing coming!”

(To Ritsuko) “Hey Ritsuko, you look nice, who’s funeral you attending? Yeah yeah, whatever, I know you’re not too thrilled about this either, at least we’re suffering together, right? I just…nothing, it’s nothing, you better get ready before Miho goes into full Bridezilla mode.”

(To Miho) “…I hate how pretty you look…oh shut up, also it’s adorable how you think having a bunch of guards follow me throughout the day will deter me from finally putting an end to this bullshit. Save me the speech, Miho! You could have chosen literally anyone in this fucking country to marry and yet you chose HIM?! What the fuck do you even see in him?! And don’t say some bullshit like ‘his personality’! Goddamnit do you seriously hate me that badly that you want me gone?! “

(To Luis) “Hey Luis, surprised to see you here, last time I checked, you and my aunt aren’t the greatest of friends and I honestly thought that Tomi had some sort of blackmail to have you keep hanging out with him. Eh, anyways, good to see you, I guess.”

(To Karada) “Oh for fuck’s sake, don’t you have to go chase some sluts?! Leave me the fuck alone you no brain having, muscle-headed, small dick guerilla!”

(To Tomi) “I have nothing to say to you, you absolute scum, honestly just looking at you is enough to piss me the fuck off, just because you’re marrying my aunt doesn’t mean that I will stop making your life a living hell, I will never see you as family and I hope you drop fucking dead, bitch.”

[saitama-division]

UNITED EMCEEZ -Enter The Hexagon- (Femme Fatale & CodeX Ver.)

Lyrics made by @uenodivision !

Bring The Beat!

[Sayaka:]

Attention, please!

We are the United Emceez!

Listen to us now!

Let's go!

(Enter the hexagon!)

Yo, I'm the guardian, the voice of Saitama's streets

Spittin' bars to a beat, protectin' my peeps

Family and friends, they're the core of my rhymes

Shielding them from harm, through the hardest of times

Butterflies in the sky, they be spreadin' the peace

My words are my cocoon, from the chaos, release

Ritsuko you wouldn't understand, cause you just spread discord

I swear, at the end, you will not win this war!

[Ritsuko:]

Oh, sister dear, you flutter high, a butterfly so frail

I'm the spider in the shadows, weaving life's morbid tale

Your dreams of peace, they dance in your naive, little head

But I see the world for what it is, a place devoid of dread

I rap to paint the void, the stark and ruthless truth

No concern for life, that's the spirit of my youth

My plans, they simmer, a poison waiting to bloom

I'll keep spinning my verses, 'til I bring about your doom

[Sayaka:]

Saitama's Femme Fatale, you won't see us with a frown!

[Ritsuko:]

Oppose Shinagawa's CodeX? What a foolish clown!

[Sayaka:]

Best believe, at the end, we will seize the day!

[Sayaka & Ritsuko:]

I'm not stopping now, I'm still on my way!

[All:]

Go louder, UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Sayaka:]

We do our best and get through every day

Who’s gonna go and show the results tonight?

[All:]

We are UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Ritsuko:]

All eyes on me, you’ll forget to blink

Raise your hands higher and higher!

[Sayaka:]

Enter the hexagon!

[Lola:]

We’ll build the greatest that is now!

[Miho:]

I won’t wait; I’ll create my own miracle!

[Kureha:]

Get ready! Our time is now!

[Sumire:]

We’re reaching for the rap game’s pinnacle!

[Lola:]

Call me Aphrodite, goddess of the divine

Beauty and love, in every line I design

I live in the lap of luxury, my life is so grand

Wealth flows like rivers at my command

I see you, "Bronze" Maiden, with your suit and your frown

Judging my vanity, but you can't bring me down

Your empire of numbers, oh how very droll

While I reign supreme, a living work of soul

[Miho:]

Reign supreme? Bitch, I'm a queen in my high-rise tower

I built my empire on ambition, not just seeking power

Blood, sweat, and tears are the foundation of my reign

While you settle for attention, I secure my domain!

My fortress is this business, my crown earned, not bought

I rap about determination, the battles I've fought

You waste time seeking the spotlight, but I command respect

Your path of ease and beauty, I utterly reject!

[Lola:]

Say what you want, bitch, but Femme Fatale is by my side!

[Miho:]

Mess with CodeX, and you won't leave here alive!

[Lola:]

I've come to far to give up at the end of the day!

[Lola & Miho:]

I'm not stopping now, I'm still on my way!

[All:]

Go louder, UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Lola:]

We do our best and get through every day

Who’s gonna go and show the results tonight?

[All:]

We are UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Miho:]

All eyes on me, you’ll forget to blink

Raise your hands higher and higher!

[Kureha:]

I paint my life with a palette of second chances

Brush strokes bold, my art advances

Like Van Gogh's stars, I swirl through strife

Monet's lilies bloom, a new lease on life

To my friend, Sumire, know my resolve is firm

For Femme Fatale, for Saitama, I stand and affirm

Though love for art and peace is what I profess

In the battle of verses, I show no finesse

[Sumire:]

I'm the voice in the dark, the truth's crusader

Rappin' 'bout the corrupt, those power-hungry traitors

A new world order, that's the vision I chase

I'd sell my goddamn soul to win this human race

Kureha, you're my friend, but hear this clear

If you block my path, I won't shed a tear

I'll summon the strength, from demons below

To protect my goal, I'll be your fiercest foe

[Kureha:]

Not a fan of the name, but I'm Femme Fatale for life!

[Sumire:]

Fucking with CodeX is a sure way to die!

[Kureha:]

I'll fight with all my might to see a brand-new day!

[Kureha & Sumire:]

I'm not stopping now, I'm still on my way!

[All:]

Go louder, UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Kureha:]

We do our best and get through every day

Who’s gonna go and show the results tonight?

[All:]

We are UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Sumire:]

All eyes on me, you’ll forget to blink

Raise your hands higher and higher!

[Sayaka & Ritsuko:]

Look up at this hexagon in the night sky

[Lola & Miho:]

Always go where the light leads you to

[Kureha & Sumire:]

Our future can be changed in the blink of an eye

[Sayaka:]

Now welcome to the new world

Rhopalocera!

[Lola:]

Aphrodite!

[Kureha:]

Eclipse!

[Femme Fatale:]

Femme Fatale!

[Ritsuko:]

Strychnine!

[Miho:]

Iron Maiden!

[Sumire:]

Diabla!

[CodeX:]

CodeX!

[All:]

Go louder, UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Ritsuko:]

We do our best and get through every day

Who’s gonna go and show the results tonight?

[All:]

We are UNITED EMCEEZ!

The words that were scattered will link up into breakbeats!

[Miho:]

All eyes on me, you’ll forget to blink

Raise your hands higher and higher!

[Ritsuko:]

Enter the hexagon!

[Sumire:]

We’ll build the greatest that is now!

[Kureha:]

I won’t wait; I’ll create my own miracle!

[Lola:]

Get ready! Our time is now!

[Sayaka:]

We’re reaching for the rap game’s pinnacle!

[edogawa-division]

There was a knock on the door to the Wicked Requiem residence, upon opening the door, the birthday girl, Kanra Akemi, was greeted by the sight of her friend, Sumire Shinomiya, holding a few boxes of presents.

"Hey there!" The anarchist greeted happily, "Happy Birthday, Kanra!" She cheered.

After letting Sumire in and making some small talk, mostly about how the other's been doing and all that, they eventually got around to opening the presents. Naturally, Kanra picked the biggest one to open first and inside revealed to be...

A large strawberry themed cat house, it was the perfect size for her cat, Haku.

Turning her attention to the next gift, it was revealed to be...

A red hoodie with spider and spider web patterns on it.

After thanking Sumire for her gifts, the black and purple haired girl turned serious for a moment. "Actually, there is one more gift, and it's not from me. She knew I was heading your way and wanted me to give this to you, I'm sure you understand why she can't show up herself but just know that she...cares...or is trying to, anyways."

She shook her head and digged into one of her pouches on her belt. "I don't know the specifics but I think it would make her content to know that you have this, 'for the more darker days' as she put it."

With that, Sumire handed Kanra a small and neatly wrapped gift, before stating that she needed to leave. With a fist bump and another happy birthday wish, Kanra lead Sumire out the door before turning her attention to the present that was still in her hand. After hesitating for a second, Kanra opened it to reveal...

A red devil heart necklace, however, something seemed a little off. Tracing her thumb over the gem, Kanra was surprised to find that it was actually a button and pressed down on it, immediately, a sweet melody began to play.

Happy Birthday Kanra! ❤

Kanra held the devil necklace in her hands, a tear falling down from her face as she heard the lullaby play from the necklace. She understood why Sumire was the one to deliver this gift, and a part of her was glad Mama Ritsuko had sent her a gift even with everything left unsaid between them. God, there was so much unsaid between Kanra and the woman who many contestants in the D.R.B. hated and called a heartless monster. Even Yuriko and Kaoru had some choice words to say about her. 

Kanra, however, could not say the same. She could never truly hate Ritsuko Okada. How could she? That was her Mama. Even now, anytime Kanra saw the scientist, she was filled with something she could only describe as a mixture of anger and love. Hell, even on her worst days the days where she missed her Mama the most Kanra wanted to reach out and hug the woman. Something that confused her. 

Kanra knew one day she would have to confront Ritsuko about everything. That day terrified her for several reasons, but most of all, she was scared of the truth. However, Kanra refused to let her fear consume her. She would face that day head on. 

Suddenly, a strange phrase entered her mind. How odd, but it was one that resonated with what she was feeling at the moment. 

“Whatever happens, happens.”

[samasmith23]

I always enjoy your write ups for every Eva episode, and I really liked your analysis of episode 13. I feel like the episode is quite underrated and under-discussed by the Eva fandom/community, and that’s a shame because I love this episode. It’s a very important episode for understanding Ritsukos character, and it’s just a fun change of pace of the usual angel fights we see at the beginning of the series.

Something I’d like to “add” onto your review that I personally found very interesting is Misatos presence inside Magi alongside Ritsuko. I think Misatos presence is intentional, especially on a subtextual level, as Misato realistically could have been cut from that entire scene if Anno didn’t want to expand on the relationship between Ritsuko and Misato. You mention the inside of Magi being like a womb, and to me it’s also like a private or almost sacred space to Ritsuko. For example, we see Maya looking inside the Magi to look at the sticky notes but she is never allowed inside MAGI. Yes Ritsuko relies on her, but it is quite literally from afar, she does not allow Maya to enter into this (very conflicting) but personal space. This is seen through the entire series witth Ritsuko and Mayas relationship. Misato on the other hand is seemingly allowed to not only enter Magi, but help Ritsuko, handing her tools and assisting her. Ironically, a sharp contrast to Misato a few scenes earlier when she told Ritusko that she never asks for help and wants to do everything on her own (side note it’s sort of funny how Misato drops that very personal remark in front of literally everyone). Regardless of the truth within that statement for Ritusko, she seems to take Misatos words to heart and allows her into Magi to help her, and by extension allowing Misato into this deeply personal, and likely painful space. I have no doubt that Ritsuko relied on Misatos presence mentally over the physical help Misato gave her. I also think inside Magi it is a showcase of their true selves, not beholden by rank or status. Misato drops titles and calls Ritsuko by her name while in Magi and Ritsuko shares likely very confidential information about MAGI at Misatos request and opens up more about her mother. Misatos school quip is sweet as well, and her VA nails a very soft voice for Misato during this scene. I don’t think it is quite accurate to say that inside the MAGI is like being inside Ritsukos heart, but I think there is heavy significance to Misato being the only person besides Ritsuko ever allowed inside MAGI.

I 99.99% know that there was never any intention by writers to ever imply that Misato and Ritsuko harbored any romantic feelings for each other, but it’s episodes like this where I wonder why there’s not more slightly delusional people out there like me haha! (The idea that Ritsuko could have a VERY repressed crush on Misato since college is so intriguing to me, but that’s a can of worms for another time.)

I hope you don’t mind my geeking out over this episode in your inbox, I just really enjoy episode 13 and I’m glad that other people view it in a similar way as I do. Looking forward to your next reviews.

Thank you very much for the positive feedback! I hadn't considered the interpretation of the MAGI as a "sacred place" for Ritsuko, but that does also make a lot of sense as does how Misato's presence helped provide some physical and emotional support for her best friend inside the tunnels of the supercomputer! Discussing this is a major reason why I love Evangelion so much! It's so multi-layered and nuanced that there's no universal interpretation for the show's plot and character developments!

[karizard-ao3]

My reactions to Evangelion episode 11: the Day Tokyo-3 Stood Still

That Eren Jaeger-looking guy from NERV is even more Eren Jaeger-looking than I realized now that I see him in his casual wear.

The Magi were mentioned before but I didn't think about them too much, but I didn't realize the supercomputers were the city's government? Unless I'm misunderstanding. That seems... unwise.

Are they going to make out in the elevator again?

I guess not :(

Shinji is so nervous about talking to his dad.

God, Gendo is an asshole.

Wait the power just went out. They're trapped in the elevator together. Maybe there's still a chance!

They're taking life support away from parts of the compound for the sake of the supercomputers? What, they can't handle a little anarchy while they get things back up and running? I am suspicious.

Shinji is a detail-oriented boy. There's nothing wrong with that.

Asuka is starting to grow on me lol. She's so hot-headed.

Sabotage!!!

Asuka is so threatened by Rei, who is literally just minding her own business all of the time.

Of course she wants to elect a group leader lol.

Lol it's getting hot in that elevator, huh?

They have their feet in buckets lol

Asuka calling Rei "Miss Perfect". She is totally threatened.

I'm wondering if Kaji is behind this blackout.

Shinji is such a philosophical boy.

Making Shinji choose between the two of them 😂

Oh, god. Asuka led them right to the Angel.

They keep almost getting into things i want to know about and then cutting to a new scene :(

They only have, like, five minutes of power when they aren't plugged in, right?

Good job, Shinji! Always saving the day when they need it.

Oh, they had battery backpacks.

I fear that Asuka might be bad at tactical planning and this is going to backfire somehow.

Nevermind, it worked.

So, she's the type to keep score. Makes sense.

How could we even know why the Angels are attacking, Asuka? I think we all shall see soon enough!

In Conclusion

Shinji is very reliable. He isn't very innovative or much of a take charge type, but he is always there as backup.

I'm interested to know why Rei thinks she's not getting special treatment (unless I misheard that part).

I enjoyed getting to see a bit more of the team dynamic between the Children.

I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be impressed Gendo got the Evas prepared manually for the pilots. Someone (Was it Ritsuko or the other woman?) framed it like he had a lot of faith in the pilots and that's why he did it, but I kind of feel like he is the worst and I'm not willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.

I think Kaji is probably working as a double agent and perhaps knows more than the rest of us do. He seems to be operating under other orders (or additional orders). I wonder what his goal is here?

[iphisesque]

official top 10 gio iphisesque favourite fanfictions🎤🎤🎤

oh shit oh fuck. babydoll by popsky (ICONIQUE). bigmouth strikes again by reconquer (hi sophie <3 THE best tridentarii fic). eternity enshrined by apartment (practically a heian-era bodice ripper). matryoshka dolls by applecrumbledore (peak johndean). the butterfly bride by khilari (canon rgu sequel to me). the wrong damn girl in the wrong damn room by phoenixgryffin (great ritsuko and naoko). terminal by kremas (still ongoing but peak tojigumi). i guess i have a call by mistspinners (evangelion mental asylum fun). the first 50 chapters of the cherry hung with snow by hermaline75 (crimson peak but a band tour). the 10th place is a tossup between neutron star by anonymoussmuthandler (harrow clone harem) and gaslit revelations babylon by laryna6 (iconic nge victorian au). sorry im sure im forgetting so many iconic fics but these are the ones i think about like once a week at least.

[duhragonball]

Neon Genesis Evangelion 04

"We have to use fourteen-year-olds to pilot the Evas. And we have to make rainbow scans of their skinny little butts! The future of mankind depends on it!"

This episode, Shinji runs away from home. Or maybe he's going back to wherever he lived before he came to Tokyo-3, so he's running away to home? He's running away is the point here.

Misato isn't very surprised to discover this, but she's still frustrated. Then Shinji's classmates, Suzuhara and the other guy... I was gonna look him up but I looked up Suzuhara and just got spoiled so fuck that. We're calling him Big Rigg Mahoney now. Yeah, Suzuhara's taller, but I don't care. We're going with it.

Anyway, Suzuhara and Big Rigg Mahoney show up at Misato's apartment because they haven't seen Shinji at school for days. Suzuhara wants to apologize for punching Shinji in Episode 3. He only did it because he blamed Shinji for fighting the Angel so close to the city, which got his sister hospitalized, but his sister chewed him out for this, and he and Big Rigg Mahoney got a first-hand look at what it's like for Shinji when he's piloting that Eva. That's his motivation, Big Rigg Mahoney's mostly involved because he likes war movies and likes playing soldier, and he's fascinated by the Evas, NERV Agency, etc.

They did not expect a grown woman to be living in Shinji's apartment, so they hand her his assignments from school and leave, but now they think Shinji is even cooler, because he's a badass pilot and he's living with a hot babe.

Let me get this out of the way: I did find this episode much more enjoyable than the last one. I had a good feeling about it, since the next-episode preview promised that Shinji would run away, which was encouraging because at least Shinji would have to make a conscious decision and act upon it, like some sort of fictional character might do. But then it occurred to me that maybe Suzuhara and Big Rigg Mahoney might have kidnapped Shinji and told him to run away, in a misguided attempt to help him. And Shinji would be like "hai!" and go AWOL simply because someone told him to. That would suck, so when these two show up early in the episode and they have no idea where he went either, it was very reassuring.

Not that it's too much of a change for Shinji. He's off on his own, but he's still mopey and dead inside. He rides the subway all the way to the end of the line, listening to his playlist of "Track 25" and "Track 26" over and over again the whole way. Then he realizes he has to "go back". I'm not sure what that means, but I assume he's talking about going back to Tokyo-3, since he doesn't seem to have a destination in mind. And yet, he's in no hurry, stopping off at a movie theater that's running some sort of film festival of Second Impact documentaries.

He watches a couple making out in the theater. I don't know if he's envious or fascinated or disgusted, or he just doesn't know what else to do.

Meanwhile, Misato discusses Shinji's disappearance with Ritsuko. We flash back to the aftermath of the battle in Episode 3. Misato had ordered Shinji to retreat before his Eva ran out of power, but Shinji went gonzo and killed the Angel instead. She scolded him for ignoring her orders, but he acted cavalier about it, reminding her that they won, so it doesn't really matter. She warned him that his attitude will only get him killed, and he replied that his attitude doesn't matter, because he's the only one who can pilot the Eva. It's either Shinji or Rei (who's still injured), or nobody, so they might as well let Shinji fuck around and find out. If he gets himself killed they're no worse off than if he doesn't pilot the Eva at all.

In hindsight, Misato is kind of relieved he's gone, because at least this way he won't bring this fatalistic mentality onto the battlefield. The disconnect here is that she's some sort of career soldier, with loyalties and duties and causes to respect. Shinji got drafted last month, and he doesn't want to do this and he's only participating because he's the indispensible man. But Shinji hates himself, so if he gets killed through incompetence, it's no better or worse than winning every battle, or abandoning his post. It's all the same to him, he's got nothing to gain or lose here.

Meanwhile, Shinji happens upon Big Rigg Mahoney, who's playing soldier out in the middle of nowhere. He's got a uniform and a tent and everything. When he spots Shinji he invites him over for whatever he's cooking, and they hang out. See, this is nice. Shinji took matters into his own hands, and now he's hanging out with his friend, Big Rigg Mahoney.

Finally, a bunch of goons from NERV show up and take Shinji into custody. The next day, Suzuhara is upset to hear the Big Rigg Mahoney let them take Shinji without a fight, but come on, man. Big Rigg Mahoney didn't get this far in life without learning to know when to fight and when to take it easy.

Back at the base, Shinji expects Misato to scold him, but she doesn't. She just asks him if he enjoyed his time away, and he says he doesn't know. Classic Shinji. They continue their argument from before. He doesn't want to pilot the Eva because he sucks at it and it's scary and painful, but he doesn't think it's right to leave it all up to Rei and the others. Misato tells him that has nothing to do with it. If he's only forcing himself to go along with this, then he'll never be in the right mindset to do any good as an Eva pilot. Better if he just calls it quits now and forgets he ever got involved.

Meanwhile, Shinji's dad could not give a shit less whether Shinji leaves or not. He's already figuring out what to do when he's gone. If Shinji won't pilot Eva Unit 01, then they'll just reconfigure it for Rei. Apparently that's a thing they can do now. I thought each pilot had their own specific Eva Unit they were bonded to, but I guess not. According to this conversation, Rei was injured while piloting Unit 00, but it wasn't in combat. They were just running experiments on Unit 00 to get it working, and there must have been an accident.

So some of this is becoming clearer. We still don't know why only certain teenagers can pilot the Evas, but we do know that there are others besides Rei and Shinji. They just haven't located very many candidates, so it's not like Shinji is completely irreplaceable. And Rei is recovering, so there's that. And Shinji can resign whenever he wants. He only got arrested last night because he left without resigning. Today, he's decided to go through with it, and NERV doesn't seem sorry to see him go. Shinji asks if he can say farewell to Misato, but they're like "You quit, so you're not authorized to see her." At this point all NERV cares about is escorting him off their base.

Suzuhara and Big Rigg Mahoney do show up to see him off, though. Suzuhara finally apologizes to Shinji for punching him, and insists that Shinji punch him back to restore his honor. Shinji reluctantly agrees, and at first he kind of holds back, but then Suzuhara tells him to hit like he means it, and he does. See, this is nice.

Shinji apologizes for leaving Tokyo-3 in a lurch, but the boys are used to classmates moving out, and they know how hard it is for Shinji to pilot the Eva, so they don't blame him for quitting. Suzuhara promises to beat up anyone who doesn't respect Shinji's decision to leave.

Finally the NERV goons decide it's time for him to go to the train station, but he pulls away just long enough to tell Suzuhara and Big Rigg Mahoney that he has been cowardly and weak after all. It's like he's having second thoughts about the whole thing.

Back at the base, Misato mulls the whole thing over, and it finally hits her that this is how Shinji expresses his feelings. He runs away and waits for someone to care that he's gone. Realizing this, she rushes to the train station to see him, but she sees the train pull out just as she arrives. For a second she thinks she was too late, but then when the train is gone...

They see each other on either side of the tracks. Shinji couldn't go through with leaving, I suppose because Suzuhara and Big Rigg Mahoney were enough to make him question his decision. But now he looks up and sees Misato cared about him too, and that puts him over the hump.

Then Shinji declares that he's home, and Misato replies "Welcome home." And that's a beautiful moment. Everything kind of came together. Now I'm starting to see what the fuss is about here.

I stand by my criticism of Episode 3, though. I don't think they needed four episodes of this show to get to this moment. Two episodes, maybe. They could have ditched all those scenes of Shinji staring at Misato's beer cans in Episode 2, and trimmed a lot of fat from Episode 3. Suzuhara could have found out about Shinji being an Eva pilot some other way before the episode started, instead of that long scene in the classroom.

Still, we're here. Shinji has decided that he actually cares about Tokyo-3 and its people, and he wants to pilot the Eva to protect his home, not just because someone else told him to do it. We'll see how well that goes, but it's a big step forward.

Also, the next episode preview shows Rei looking healthy and doing things, so that seems like a big improvement too. Everything's coming up Milhouse!