#c. hyunwoo

[7698]

[carmenblake]

WHO: @seongxhyunwoo WHERE: Frontier Foods

"Ellie." Carmen's voice was stern as she did her best to corral the seven year old during their weekly grocery trip. In an attempt to not spend more of her dwindling savings than she already was, she'd taken her goddaughter to McDonalds for lunch prior to arriving at Frontier Foods. They say grocery shopping on a full stomach was better, right? But maybe the chocolate milkshake the pair had shared wasn't the best idea. Ellie had been on what? A sugar high? Ever since they stepped through the doors. "Clementine!" This time using the child's full name, Carmen abandoned the shopping cart to chase after the young girl who'd made a beeline for the cereal aisle with no regard for anyone else around her.

It was only when the little girl ran into the legs of someone else, causing her to stumble backwards and land on her butt, that Carmen let out a hefty sigh. "Come on." Reaching down to help the little girl up, Carmen made sure she was okay before nodding to the man in front of them. "Apologize, Ellie."

Holding on to her guardian's hand, seven year old Ellie hid her face in the side of Carmen's arm before a gentle nudge had her looking up to the stranger with a bashful smile and a quiet apology before looking to Carmen to make sure she'd atoned for her mistake. "Thank you, this is why I told you to stay near me. Fruity Pebbles aren't worth a collision, honey."

Finally turning her attention to the man Ellie had run in to, Carmen did her best to offer him an apologetic smile. "Sorry about her, I guess milkshakes aren't exactly great to share with a seven year old before coming to the grocery store. You okay? She didn't get anything on your clothes or anything right? I swear her hands always seem to be sticky and I don't know why."

[kingminie]

until forever falls apart | 01.

pairing: kim taehyung, reader 

genre: angst, exes au. 

warnings: emotional cheating, infidelity, swearing, detailed smut, chain smoking as a coping mechanism.

word count: 11.8k

description: you’ve never been much of a believer in the phrase ‘first love never dies’ but it seems as if the universe badly wants to prove it to you — and you’re absolutely and royally damned the moment you find out that the phrase holds truth. 

or alternatively, you come as a stand-in photographer for your cousin’s prenup shoot and you find out that it’s your secret ex who’s about to get married, and kim taehyung really doesn’t make it any less easy for you. 

01 | ongoing.

Love has always been easy for you — both falling into or getting out of it, but more of the latter, really. 

However, there are things about this so-called ‘love’ that you don’t quite get — will probably never get — and it leaves you in a sticky position when friends come to ask advice that roots from such a concept.

It always ends in a snotty mess and a sigh of I don’t know why I came to you for this at the end anyway. It makes you feel like shit; a clueless, ignorant, wondering piece of shit because how is it that everyone seems to have been looking at love and defining it from a single different lens with a unified perspective, and you’re stuck at seeing it from the other endpoint.

It isn’t your fault you don’t assimilate hurt with loving, is it? It isn’t your fault that you don’t expect to clean up a colossal mess every time love comes to its end. And it most certainly isn’t your fault that when love ends, you let it go. It ended, and that’s that. For you, anyway. So, why exactly, do people fault you for having such a reaction at the conclusion of a relationship?

Why does it seem to be a taboo and something that’s unheard of when a month after a relationship ends, you find yourself not grieving over a love that’s lost? When and why does it seem to have become the standard to mope and pine and cry as if acceptance and moving on is an outlawed concept right after a relationship ends?

That’s because you’re a heartless, unfeeling bastard, that’s why, as your best friend, Jungkook, so likes to put it every single time. And maybe, it is the defeat and the eventual acceptance that people will never see things in your perspective that you just roll your eyes and move on with your day. 

Love, for you, is something that ends when it ends. A wound that closes, heals. It leaves a scar, sure. You remember the hurt, yes. But the initial peak of pain wouldn’t be there again if it healed, would it.

With all that, you’ve become unsure — of what to do, of what to say, of how to act — when people lament over a lost love. Which, at this very moment, is what exactly your sister is doing. 

All tears, snot, and hiccups under your blankets. 

Sobs wrack her body in an uncontrollable shake, a vibrating mess under the sheets as you’re left to wonder what the fuck to do with your hands. But you never get the answer because she wails, head lifting from the blankets, “How could he do that to me? Six years, six years! Six years he threw away for what, a year of meaningless sex with his assistant?” 

You don’t really think it’s meaningless when dear, dear respectable Hyunwoo decides to break off the engagement, but you keep your mouth shut and continue to awkwardly pat your sister’s back. 

Your hand stills just an inch away from her back when she looks at you, wet eyes and mouth set in a downward curve, and whispers, “What should I do now?” She sniffles and you flinch. Because her goddamn snot is staining your bed but fuck, okay, you can’t think about that now, “I love him.”

You hesitate, weighing the words you’re about to speak in your head and thinking about the consequences before settling for a question, “You–you’re not thinking about giving him another shot if he asks for it, are you?” 

At this, your sister remains silent and you sigh because yes, yes she will give him a chance in one heartbeat if the bastard do so much as give her a fucking petal and a printed ‘I’m sorry’ hallmark note.

“You don’t get it.” 

Ah, there it is. 

Of course, it’s always going to come down to you not getting it. 

Maybe your sister sees it, the anger bubbling in your gaze as you glare at her, because she scrambles to sit down with her legs underneath her, knees parallel each other as she kneels on the bed facing you.

And it would have been funny, seeing your older sister like this, but the searing exasperation breaks through and you let it, mouth opening, “No, you don’t get it. See, this is not just a matter of moving the fuck on. He fucked you over, Hana, so much that there’s no amount of apology or groveling he can do to fix that. He fucked his assistant when he’s due to walk down the aisle in a year with you and if that doesn’t spell out how much respect he has for you, for our family, and you still choose to remain blind despite that, then you came to the wrong person because I won’t coddle you.” 

“I care about you,” your voice softens and you see her shoulders slump, “This is not just about my once-it-ends-then-it-ends view on relationships. Hyunwoo did an unthinkable, unforgivable thing and there’s no going back from that. I’m not letting you walk back to the person who lacks respect for a relationship, much less for you. Do you get where I’m coming from?” 

Hana nods meekly, head hanging low before you hear her sniffle once more. It hurts to see her like this and you want nothing more but to pummel the son of a bitch who did this to her, “I’m sorry.” 

You shake your head and you let out a breath, all air knocked out from your lungs when she slumps forward, arms snaking around your shoulders as she pulls you in for a tight hug, the phrase of ‘thank you’ and ‘sorry’ a litany on her tongue.  You squeak as her legs slither their way around you in a tight grip and she lets out a weak laugh that sounded much more like a wheeze before you push her off, feeling a wet blot on your shoulder. 

“I want to be you for a day. Not like you,” she mutters as she gets comfortable on the pillows, your pillows, “But be you entirely. I want this pain to vanish in a week and just forget about him.” 

She pauses, “Maybe after I key his car.” 

The pain doesn’t vanish, you think and tell her. “I just learned how to deal with it, Hana. And it isn’t overnight that I do it. And you will get over it too. Heal from it. Someday, one day.” 

The silence that follows is comforting, and you think she must’ve fallen asleep, just as most do after a good cry. But she hasn’t, you realize, when she rolls over once more and speaks in a quiet voice, “The way you are right now,” she pauses, only continuing when you give her a nod, “is it because of him?”

There are only a handful of people that could fit about who she means, you know that, but you refuse to speak of any of them and opt to ask her a question instead, “Which way that I am exactly are you referring to?” 

“The closed-off you,” Hana replies, a soft tilt to her words, “I had a theory, you know, that you moved on so fast from the relationships you had after because you were never really invested in the people after him. That he broke you, enough for you to place that, whatever you have around your heart that doesn’t allow people to hurt you. You love other people, but you never really allow them to love you as much because of it which makes detachment and parting easier when it ends.” 

You don’t really mean to, but the words Hana speaks are like a vacuum, drawing you into a place you’ve managed to tuck away in the very back of your mind. Memories rush in and you drown in it — of honey blond hair, rectangle smiles, and skin that smelled of oakmoss and jasmine. 

“Am I right?” 

You let out a laugh as you nudge a pillow towards your sister, “You and your unending theories. No, Hana. It’s not because of anyone in particular. This is just how I am, how I think. It’s just unfortunate that it's only the minority that shares the same sentiments as I do.” 

Hana looks as if she’d try to refute before deciding against it, groaning when her phone rings and you raise an eyebrow because who in hell would be calling her at midnight. She shakes her head, twisting the phone around so you can see who’s calling and you see the word Studio and you shrug before she takes the call, only hearing snippets of the conversation and it seems as if it's about work. 

Hana owns a photography studio — a hobby turned business venture with her friends. Your parents were against it initially, deeming it a ‘not suitable’ business for Hana, but your older sister is a head-strong bull and proceeded with her plans without a single support from your parents and of course, because she’s Hana Park, she can make anything succeed if she puts her mind to it. 

“—yeah, you goof, I’ll be right there, don’t worry. Why are you so stressed about this anyway, is this your secret wedding or something?” You lie closer to your sister and she mouths ‘Jimin’ before returning to picking her nails, “I get it, okay. Stop freaking out, I promise to be there tomorrow. M’kay, bye.” 

She heaves a dragged-out, exaggerated sigh just as she tosses her phone on the bed where it bounced, “You know, I’d assume it’s our dear brother’s prenuptial photoshoot tomorrow with the way he’s freaking out over the details. I’d actually think that if I didn’t know of him and his single ass and his emotional attachment to his bachelor title.” 

“It’s Sunday tomorrow, and you’re booked because of that phone call,” You list, “So I can only assume Jimin knows one of them and used his connections to book your exclusive ass into working on a Sunday.” 

Hana laughs, “You’re not wrong. Soyeon made the reservation for November, which is like, a month from now. Jimin moved it for tomorrow in such a rush last week for reasons I don’t know why.” 

“Soyeon?” You gasp, eyes going wide, “You’re not talking about Yang Soyeon, are you? Oh my god, how did I not know about this?”

Your sister snorts, ungraceful and loud, “Who would have expected for the youngest cousin in the family to be the first one to be wed, huh? Date’s set for April next year and I don’t even know who she’s marrying,” But she pauses and a frown mars her features, “I would’ve been the first one to walk the aisle and yet, here I am.” 

Wait. 

“Hana,” you start, “aren’t you meeting Hyunwoo’s parents tomorrow for brunch? To formally call off the wedding? Isn’t that what you came here for tonight, because you were having second thoughts of actually calling it off tomorrow?”

You see the realization dawn upon her, her eyes widening in recognition of the planned confrontation, her mouth dropping to a comical shape of the letter ‘o’ before she sits up so fast you actually ask if her back’s okay and you hear the frantic hits of her nails against the glass of her phone, the worry leaking thickly in her voice as she speaks to multiple people, all of which ending in a frustrated sigh and groan from your older sister. 

“Fuck!” she screams as she disconnects from a call once more, “I can’t find anyone to replace me, everyone’s either booked already or have plans for tomorrow. Fuck, shit, I’m screwed. Jimin’s going to kill me. No photographer’s available tomorrow, what am I going to do now, I—you.”

You still, nailed in place by her stare, “Fuck are you looking at me for?” 

It’s in this moment you feel the doom coming down on you from all the corners of the universe when Hana smiles, actually feeling it that you shiver. She picks up the phone, calls Jimin, asks if 10 o’clock is okay for everyone to gather tomorrow, kisses your cheek good night. 

Kiss of fucking death, you feel like. 

You’re never a morning person — nor do you have plans to become one — and you aren’t used to being awakened by a goddamn wet, slimy tongue licking your face all over. 

Hana’s laugh echoes around your room, followed by hushed good job from her and a shrill bark from her dog (you really did not know how Orion arrived here when the dog wasn’t even here last night), and you are never one to have thoughts of murder so early in the morning but your family has really been testing your limits. But then you remember that you willingly handed over to Hana the passcode to your apartment, something for emergencies and shit like that, but of course, she took it as an invitation to come and go as she pleases. 

Fortunately, she cleans up after Orion’s mess, thank god. 

Rolling over, you prepare to squint as protection against the glare of the sun since Hana had already pulled back the curtains, but you sit up at the lack of the sun’s intrusion into your eyes and see that the sun hasn’t even risen yet. The city that you can see through the glass window is quiet, still in deep sleep. As you should be just before Hana woke you up. 

“Dad’s going to have a fit when I tell him what you’re blackmailing me to do,” you groan, falling back on your pillow, “I’m running his business and here you are making me take photos of people Dad hates, well, by extension.”

Hana does nothing but flash you a grin, “You’re the only one I can trust to be on par with my skills, honey. Besides, I already have Dad booked in the freaking out area ‘cause you know, I’m a bachelorette now.”

You roll your eyes and you move off your bed, making it neat and tidy to which Hana scoffs before grabbing the mug of cold coffee right from her hands and chugging it all down. Looks like you’ll need more than a cup with what you’re going to be faced with today. 

“Is Jimin coming? My car’s in the mechanic, I’m getting it tomorrow.”

Hana nods before telling you just how far Jimin is from your apartment, “About Jimin, actually.” Your sister trails off and you feel an oncoming headache because of course, there’s more. 

“I didn't exactly tell him I can’t make it today so I’m trusting you to, um, calm him down when he freaks? He’s only weak to your charms and absolutely immune to mine.” 

Turns out a little while after that, Jimin’s absolutely immune to the both of you. Especially you.

“No, what the fuck. What—no.” 

Jimin stands frozen, fingers gripping the edges of the kitchen island. His eyes are wide, mouth open in disbelief as he listens to Hana’s explanations of why she can’t go today, her eyes flashing as if to call you for help but you only shrug because there’s really nothing you can do to help her out of this. She made her own bed, might as well let her lie in it. 

It irks you quite a bit though when Jimin starts to become unreasonable despite Hana’s crystal clear explanation as to why she’s unavailable today, and on a typical day, you know Jimin would understand, and would easily let it go because obviously, Hana’s life matters take precedence over a photoshoot that can be scheduled on a different day. Jimin today, however, is extra adamant on not having you take over the shoot and it might have very, just very slightly struck the wrong nerve in you.

“You know, Jimin, if this is a matter of your trust in my abilities, I’d gladly back out of this. I’m doing this as a favor to Hana, I’m not here to help you,” you quip, tight and low as you regard the both of them, “So, if you refuse to accept my help, then call your friend to find another photographer, better yet schedule another one with Hana.”

Hana starts to protest but Jimin shakes his head, turns to you with soft eyes and a pouting set of lips, “I’m sorry, that came off wrong. Really wrong. I swear I wasn’t trying to undermine your abilities, nor am I saying that there is anything to undermine because you’re good as shit at this, maybe even better than Hana, it’s just that—”

He cuts off his ramble mid-sentence as if to catch himself — to keep from spilling whatever his reservation about you being the stand-in for Hana, which you don’t really know what. 

Three things about Jimin are these: he rambles when he’s extremely nervous, fidgets with his thumbs when he’s scared, and refuses to make any eye contact if he believes he’s done something wrong. It’s always one of the three when it comes to him and never altogether. And yet, he stands in front of you, doing all three simultaneously and your heart plummets to the marble flooring beneath you because what is he so scared of, really, to be like this in front of you. 

“Look, if you don’t want me to do this, that’s okay,” You start to speak and Jimin turns to you and opens his mouth to speak when you shake your head. You aren’t finished speaking, “That is, if you have an alternative, if Soyeon agrees to reschedule, I’m sure Hana can fit them right in some other time—” You give a pointed look at your sister who rolls her eyes but nods, “—but if they don’t, you have no choice, Jimin. Unless you want to take the photos yourself.”

Jimin lets out a breath, agrees, and proceeds to call whoever he needs to and converses in a low tone that isn’t discernible to you, but Hana can hear and your eyebrows furrow in concern when her head turns so fast towards Jimin’s direction, panic clear-cut in her eyes as she picks up on whatever it is that Jimin is saying. She curses under her breath, turns ghostly pale before she pulls Jimin into one of the guest rooms, leaving you to your thoughts and your second cup of coffee. 

“You kept this?”

It’s a good three minutes after that Jimin’s voice pulls you out of your trance — your attention previously held by the large black ant that is now on top of an apple. You turn and your breath hitches at the rough sketch of the overly-familiar Pomeranian in his right hand. You shrug, “Jungkook must have left it there when he came over.” 

At this, Jimin raises his eyebrows. Stares at the picture a little bit too long before putting it back in place, under Jungkook’s purple-pink painting of a sunset, to the right of Jimin’s present two years before. He then looks at you, really looks at you, that you become unnerved enough to look away and pretend to busy yourself with some imaginary dust on the counter. 

You know. You know how the framed sketch is too clean, too in place, and too taken care of to be something that your best friend accidentally left behind. And you know Jimin knows this too with the way his eyes turn to you and you fear. Fear that pity would be reflected in them and so you stand abruptly, deaf to the frantic calls of Hana and you head straight to the building basement and settle comfortably on the passenger seat of Jimin’s car. 

You ran because you’re a coward — afraid to face questions you know you have no answers to.

Jimin enters not a minute later, silent and mum, but the silent looks your sibling keeps giving you is not something you miss no matter how discreet he tries to be about it. You brush it off though, citing the tense atmosphere to be the reason he’s doing so. 

But little do you know that this is the first of the many mistakes you will be making — the tiniest among all others.

The theme is simple. Glamour, editorial-esque Vogue-spread motif. Fit for the rich. Something that exudes elegance and opulence. Classy, simple, and elegant. You nod as you skim through the print-out Hana rushes to get to you through one of her employees, one hand busy writing ideas and suggestions. 

It warms your heart that despite all the things Hana has to face today, she hasn’t failed to make everything easier for you, as she always does. And everything’s in accordance, just as they should be. That is, except for one, someone. Jimin really cannot stop himself from shaking and you actually fear the poor boy is turning into a leaf, dancing in the wind, with how he physically cannot stop himself from moving. 

You’ve had enough of it — his nervous fidgeting, the frantic scan of his eyes among the crowd, the unending bounce of his knees — so you move to approach him, just in time to pluck out the cigarette he’s about to light in his hand and he jumps, “Minie, you’re making me nervous here. I’ve seen you nervous but it’s never been this bad.” 

Jimin looks at you and your chest constricts at the face he’s making. A beat, two beats before he lets out a shaky breath, “I’m sorry.”

You think of the exchange back at your apartment, the one where it came off as if he had no faith in you as Hana’s substitute and you let out a small laugh. You know Jimin would never think that. Flicking his chin, you shake your head, “It was me who took your words the wrong way, Min. You don’t need to apologize.”

He looks as if he wants to say more but a car pulls up, red and ostentatious with the way the roof is folded down, and you grin as you see your cousin, a matching upward curve to her lips. 

It isn’t new, really, when you catch sight of her hair — beautiful shades of cotton candy pink and pastel blue glinting under the sun. 

Beautiful, daring Soyeon, the darling of the Yangs. 

You nearly meet your end, though, that day if it isn’t for Jimin cursing and pulling you back when Soyeon isn’t able to stop her car at the designated yellow parking line and she too squeaks a wheeze when she steps on the brakes. The car comes to a stop, and you see her breath does too, before she throws her head back and laughs. 

“You’re fucking crazy.”

She sticks out her tongue before she jumps over the door, her flimsy taupe pants billowing after her. You only manage to let out a yelp of protest before she has you and Jimin in a bone-crushing hug and you feel your chest rasp to get some air in when she squeezes once more before finally letting go. 

“This is a two-people marriage we’re having today, right? You’re not marrying yourself here?” You ask and laugh as she rolls her eyes. It’s definitely her thing and it wouldn’t be a surprise if she did. “I didn’t even know you were in a relationship and now you’re getting married?”

She shrugs, a wide smile still on her lips, “It just happened,” Her eyebrows furrow when she looks over at Jimin who’s uncharacteristically silent and nudges him, “I still won’t forgive you. I know my groom’s your best friend but it doesn’t really give you a free-pass to have him here at six in the morning to get you coffee. Who does that?”

You don’t really hear what Jimin has to say to her because you’re bidding your goodbye to them both when one of Hana’s assistants — the one she had assigned to brief you over all the details of today’s shoot — pulls you from the conversation, apology written all over her face at the thought of interrupting you but as soon as she open her mouth to speak, you dismiss it with an its okay and you signal for her to go ahead. 

“This is the final list of the concepts Hana had brainstormed which one of the client is yet to choose from,” she hands you a thin stack of paper, a portfolio sandwiched between two clear binding covers, “The bride has already chosen the concepts she wants that are to be included for today’s shoot, so, all that's left is to hand the checklist to the groom for the shoot next week.”

Nodding, you skim through the portfolio and shit, it’s definitely good. 

You’re whisked away towards the building, directed towards the seventh floor of the rented building in which you’re told Soyeon’s groom is, handpicking his outfits for the day. 

You give the door a knock, hearing a bustle of people talking on the other side of the door, and when no one answers, you push the door open. You’re immediately greeted by a flurry of people walking back and forth, all of them either with stacks of paper in their arms or Brioni and Gucci suits in tow. 

It’s a mess, a downright mess you want to run from because you haven’t ingested enough coffee to face this. 

Which is exactly why you nearly cry when someone steps in front of you, a neat smile in place and a large cup of iced coffee in one hand, a hand extending towards you, “You look like you need this.” 

He tilts his head once, gesturing inside the room, “I’m Yoongi, Min Yoongi. Jimin texted me earlier that his other sister is standing in for Hana and I assume that’s you.” 

Something feels vaguely familiar about Min Yoongi and you list it off as a passing name Jimin had mentioned in the stories he had told you. 

“There’s a meeting room on the very far left, grumpy groom’s there,” Yoongi smiles, “Nice meeting you, um—”

“(Y/N). My name’s (Y/N), nice to meet you too, Yoongi.”

You think as you walk that there’s no point in going over next week’s concept today since Hana can already make it by the next photoshoot and she would’ve understand better the dynamics of it all if they talk then, but okay, since you’re already here, might as well help all the way. 

Through the frosted glass of the meeting room, you see a silhouette, tall and broad. You have never been a people-person and meeting new ones really isn’t your strong point so you take three deep breaths, hand tightening on the cup of coffee Yoongi handed you, before pushing the glass door open. 

“Hi, I’m sorry I ran a bit late. It’s—” 

And you stop. 

You stop because you suddenly can’t feel the cold cup slipping from your grip. You stop because you feel the liquid pool at the very bottom of your shoes, sticky and wet and messy. You stop because you can’t breathe. You stop because your heart fucking stops too at the sight of Kim Taehyung. 

Beautiful, dazzling Kim Taehyung. 

First boyfriend, first love, now ex-lover, Kim Taehyung. 

Soyeon’s groom and soon-to-be husband, Kim Taehyung.

“Everything okay here?” Yoongi. You hear his footsteps behind you before you see him and you can’t be thankful enough at the interference that’s very much needed. 

But you allow yourself to be pathetic, just as you always are around Kim Taehyung. And because you can’t help it, frankly, when your eyes meet his and all sense that is good and common jumps out the window behind him. Because he looks fucking beautiful — him and his honey hair that’s now framing his face, a little bit longer, lighter. Because the room reeks of him, jasmine, vanilla, and oakmoss and it consumes you. The part of you that, despite it all, still longs for the Kim Taehyung from four years past.

On a good day and you meet him once more, you think you would have laughed. A fake smile and a head held high would’ve done it in front of him. But all it takes is one look now. One look, at the time when all your defenses are down, for the self-imposed chain that blocks it all to break and give, a domino effect in your mind as it all comes back; the whirlwind of feelings and emotions that the calamity of him brings forth. 

You nod, feeling the light touch of Yoongi’s fingers around your arm, and you anchor yourself with it. Pull yourself from drowning in him once more. “Yeah, sorry,” You breathe, “It slipped. I’m really sorry.”

“No, no, it’s okay. I’ll have someone take care of it, don’t worry,” Yoongi waves you off when you bend down to start cleaning up your mess, nods toward Taehyung, “Go on, he gets grumpy if he’s left to wait.” 

Oh, you know. 

So, you do. 

You drag your legs to where Taehyung stands, feeling like you’re hauling wet logs for limbs. It’s silent, save for the sound of Yoongi’s shoes against the floor as he kicks at the fallen blocks of ice, and maybe, he takes the silence for Taehyung’s bout of pettiness because he hisses a quiet behave before he walks out. The silence becomes even more suffocating when now it’s just you and Taehyung. 

“So—”

“I—”

You shut your mouth when he speaks at the same time as you. 

You decide, though, to continue because you’re here for one thing and that one thing entails that you have something to say to him. But he doesn’t, he shouldn’t. 

“So, let’s talk about concepts. I’ve been told that Soyeon has already chosen the ones for today — for both your individual and couple shots, and you get to choose the ones for the shoot with Hana next week. Here,” you slide the portfolio across the table, taking a seat across his own without waiting for him, “Hana already made an outline for everything so, this, is basically a checklist you just have to choose from and—”

“How are you?” 

“—I’m just going to wait until you’re done filling them out so I can bring them back and start with—”

“(Y/N).” You finally look at him then and you look away the second you do because you’re trying so hard to keep yourself whole and you feel like one second more in his gaze and you’ll fall apart, “I’m sorry.” 

And you try. God, you try so hard to repress the tiny, evil voice that pushes you to throw reason out the window. But it comes out anyway, and there’s no stopping what flows out of your mouth after, “Why,” you laugh, “Sorry because you wouldn't have chosen Hana's studio if you knew I was the one to take your photos? Or sorry because you had my brother acting like a train wreck just to keep this from me? Don’t worry I won’t be here next week.” 

His face pinches, tongue rolling out to wet his lips, “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Then don’t apologize to me—” you grit, fists clenched and heart thundering, “—as if you assumed that seeing you has put me in a position that hurt me. Because it really doesn’t. Not anymore, Taehyung. So if you have anything to apologize for—” 

You cut yourself off because no, no he has nothing to apologize for. He doesn’t have to say sorry. One person deciding to walk out of a relationship doesn’t warrant an apology from them. An explanation, sure, but you don’t really need it from him. He made it clear enough all those years ago just before he slammed the door of your apartment shut that he just didn’t love you enough — not anymore then. 

It’s been four years. It’s been four long years and you should be over him — and you are, you’re certain that you are. But it doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt because it does, fuck, it still hurts so much and you don’t know why. 

“—apologize to Jimin because I just know he feels like shit for lying to me because of you.” 

You commit your second mistake that same day in the middle of shooting Taehyung’s individual photos. Soyeon had gone for a nature theme this time and so you find yourself in the middle of the forest with a near-naked Taehyung in tow and thank heavens it rains because one more glimpse through the viewfinder at his well-oiled torso and you might have combust and run away from the photoshoot, Hana’s reputation be damned. 

Jimin seems to be attached to you now, becoming a human magnet not long after he had apologized so much he knelt, snuggling to your side every chance he gets that it’s suffocating you because he’s overcompensating but you don’t really have the heart to call him out. Not when he looks like a puppy whose tail got accidentally stepped on when you get around to even do so much as try. 

So, you let him become your shadow for the time being, finally letting out a huge breath of relief when lunch time comes around and everybody takes a break and you slip past him to the very back of the dilapidated cabin you stumbled upon just before the last shoot ended, not too deep into the forest that faces the river. 

Finally, you think, as you savor the peace, even though momentary. You’re glad to be away from the commotion and it makes you realize once more why you choose to be cooped up in an office. It’s because you really can’t handle this many people and it physically and emotionally drains you that you can’t think.

You pause when you reach into your pockets, the gritty warning from Hana and Jimin an alarm ricocheting in your mind how it’s an unhealthy habit and it’s going to fucking ruin you someday. But the short-lived guilt is replaced by justifications of how it’ll be a free-pass and your siblings can fuck off because they’re the reason you’re here in the first place. 

Besides, burning through one stick won’t hurt them if they don't know. 

So you let your fingers feel for the familiar leather case, pull the only stick inside and you’re so, so close to reaching your sweet release from this damned mental pressure when you realize you left your lighter at home. Letting out a curse, you clamp your mouth around the unlit cigarette, letting it hang and opting to indulge in its semi-sweet smell that goes so well with the rain. 

“Want a light?”

You still, the cigarette falling from your lips at the sudden fright. Down, down, and down until it’s washed away by the rain. What a waste, you lament. Sighing, you turn and see Taehyung who’s sporting a sheepish smile, the same familiar white in between his own mouth, lit unlike yours, “I’d accept, but there’s really nothing that needs lighting anymore.”

He has a shirt on now, you notice, flimsy and buttoned up halfway. His hair is tousled messily, now free from the rigid form it previously had, and you give him your back when you feel the urge to fix the fraction of hair that has fallen forward. You hear him take a drag and you smell before you see the tendrils of gray smoke when he releases and god, the small whiff, even in the tiniest fume, has your shoulder relaxing. 

“I’d offer one but I don’t have any spare with me,” you hear him say before you feel him move, “I’ll get the fallen one for you, if you want.”

You roll your eyes and wave him off before you see him lean against the other column, the change in position means that he’s now closer, closer than he’s ever been since the day you last saw him, years ago. And he’s close enough that the thin material of his shirt brushes against your hoodie when the wind moves. And you want to move too, only if it isn’t for the fact that one move and you’ll either fall into the river or be skewered by the worn down wood and you don’t really feel like dying today. 

Ironic, how you went for a smoke break to relieve the stress of the day, only to have it doubled. 

Now, this is where you make the second mistake. 

Because you really don’t mean to stare at Taehyung. You don’t mean to let your stare at his mouth linger a second too long that he sees.  It’s just unfortunate that the cigarette is in his mouth, and you stay fixated on the damn cigarette that you fail to see him catch your gaze and hold it. 

It’s unfortunate that you don’t take a step back when he takes one step forward. 

It’s unfortunate that you become pliant when his cold fingers softly grip your chin, coaxing your mouth to open and welcome the smoke that he blows from his own mouth, hot and intoxicating and tinged with the memories of all the nights past that he’s done this. 

It’s unfortunate that you take a long drag when he places the soft end of the cigarette from his mouth to yours, unhesitating and eager. 

“Feeling better?” He asks, gentle as he pulls the stick, planting it back to the hold of his mouth. You see a slight upward curve at the corners of it. 

This is bad. Wrong and unacceptable and absolutely inappropriate, you know. But you can’t help but accept when he offers one more drag, an offer of release. This time you pluck it out from his fingers, feel the warmth of him around the smoke, and inhale. 

It’s only when the embers die out that you feel it, the heavy feeling coming back tenfold as you realize the gravity of what you just did. Not for anyone else, but for you. The toll this will have on you when you go home and have all the time in the world to think about your stupidity. So before you get sucked into the void of self-destruction, you excuse yourself, not caring about the delicate drops of rain that fall but not before you turn back and shout your thanks. 

“Okay, you shared a smoke, so what,” you mutter to yourself as you dry yourself off. You’re two people who share a history, a history that’s now dead and gone. A flame that was once bright but has now burned out, never to be rekindled again. 

You enter the building with thoughts of rationalization that tries to justify what you’ve done as something harmless, clouding your mind enough that you don’t see Jimin barrel towards you with a smile on his face, only to be replaced with disgust when he breathes and chokes at the ghost of smoke that clings to your clothes. 

He rummages through a nearby luggage and returns with a bottle of perfume, “If you want your head still attached to your shoulders by tonight, you’d know better and douse yourself in that shit because Hana’s here to take over and you only have two minutes to shove Listerine down your throat before she finds you.” 

In the haste of trying to avert your sister’s wrath, you damn near shower the entire contents of the bottle, only to realize that night when you come home that despite the endless showers you take, you still smell like him. Because of all people, Jimin just had to take from Taehyung’s things and now you’re doused with him all over again. 

It’s later that night that you’ll fall asleep to the smell of jasmine and vanilla despite years of trying so hard to rid your apartment of any scents. 

Of any trace of Kim Taehyung.

The third and fourth mistake, you make five days later. A Friday that you’re miraculously off work early. Well, technically, you can get off whenever you want but as the faithful, loving, and overworking youngest child that you are, you’ve assimilated longer hours at your father’s company to productivity and so you’ve never really found reason to clock off early when you can do so much more if you stay a bit later than most.

Besides, the company won’t run by itself, so there’s that. 

Now, though, you wonder why you thought like that because as you walk down the street, everything looks divine. The setting sun settles on the horizon, sandwiched between two skyscrapers, bleeding purple and orange and pink and it’s breathtaking. Painfully so. For the first time, you indulge yourself in the sounds of the busy city and for a change, it’s peaceful despite the loudness. You can’t remember the last time you took a stroll like this, having been so immersed in work. The last time you walked down the street the like had been years ago, with—

The breath you take is sharp and sudden that it has you bent over on the sidewalk, coughing and wheezing your lungs out that people start to look. You flash a smile, sending a quick thanks to your sister’s ex-lover for choosing to establish the studio within a five-minute walk from the company building, and nearly combusting on the spot when you pull their glass door that clearly says push right after you nearly heave your lungs out from climbing 10 sets of stairs because the elevator isn’t working, coincidentally.  

“Hey,” you greet the people on the lounge before specifically turning to Younha — the one who had walked you through everything on the previous shoot, “Is Hana here? I have the initial photos ready if she wants to see. Played around and edited most of them.”

Younha looks sheepish as she raises her hand to her nape where she nervously scratches, “About that,” she grimaces, “Hana phoned earlier that she’s running a bit late tonight so she told me to look over the photos and pick the final ones with the client, but I don’t trust myself enough to do that just yet, so would it be okay if we go through it together?” 

You assure her it’s okay. And really, it is, because you’ve finished work anyway and it’s a Saturday tomorrow. You can afford to be late an hour or so. You watch her plug the USB on one of the computers lined up against the wall, see her gasp when she pulls up the photos. 

“Oh my god, these are beautiful. You’re telling me you shot each of these by yourself, edited them all on your own, all in less than a week,” Younha turns to you, eyes wide, “Can’t you come and work with us?”

You laugh, genuine and loud, “The raw files were already beautiful untouched. Just touched up some lighting here and there.”

“Yeah, and who took those raw shots, hm? Who coordinated every single thing that resulted in those shots looking like that? You, that’s who,” Younha seems to realize who she’s talking to and she blushes before muttering something else you can’t hear, “Also, about Hana—” 

Uh-oh. This can’t be good.

“—so she told me earlier if I can pick out the final photos with the client, right? And since you’re here,” Younha trails off and you still there is no way, no way that you’re going to sit hours dissecting each photo with Soyeon, worse if it’s Taehyung. You have your pride and you’ll cling to that even if it’s the last thing you do in this world.

No way in hell. “Hana’s on her way here, right? I think she can make it.”

Younha nods, a low hum before she answers, “She can. In two hours. Maybe. Not sure. Our client, however—” She tilts her head to the right. Towards the direction of Hana’s office. “—is here.”

It’s a sigh of defeat you let out. Walking away from here means you admit you’re a coward, walking in Hana’s office will mean you’re weak. See, it’s always a lose-lose thing for you everytime a certain Kim is involved. The very, and only, Kim who seems to be haunting every part of your daily life the past five days. Or in this current case, a future Kim but a Kim nonetheless. 

Younha smiles, the sly fox, when you place your bag back down on the table, “If I’m going to stay here for the night, might as well ask for coffee. Lots and lots of it.”

You only barely get the full sentence out but Younha is already on her heels with a mock salute.

You push the door to Hana’s office, making sure (twice) not to pull this time, and your eyes land on Kim Taehyung whose eyebrows rise in surprise upon seeing you. If he thinks you’re meaning to keep on meeting him like this, well, he’s wrong. The universe likes to spring surprises down your path of life and it just so happens that for now, Kim Taehyung might be its play thing — to torment you with, most probably. 

He sits on the couch that rests against the white wall, beside the windows that occupy the whole one side of the room that overlooks the city. Hana’s office is more like her office and a miniature studio, exclusive for her and whoever she decides to let in here, separate from the lounge and the main studio. It’s an industrial loft, made modern and more suited to her taste and it’s just so goddamn bright in here, you realize.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” you mutter as the door clicks shut behind you. 

You head straight to Hana’s computer, turning it on and plugging the USB before you plop down on the office chair. “I had the photos with me and I dropped by to leave it for Hana but she apparently has things to attend to for the next two hours and you’re here already so, yeah.”

Taehyung only nods, silent and awkward when he stands. 

You sigh, “Grab a chair and come here, I guess. We have, like, a thousand photos to sift through. See if you’d like any changes done to them. The earlier we finish, the better.”

Three hours pass after that and you’re left with no Hana in sight, 325 file numbers listed down, a faint headache and tired eyes, a hungry stomach, and three accidental brushes of Taehyung’s hair on your cheek because what before is a ruler-long distance between the two of you has been reduced to mere centimeters, and Jesus Christ, you don’t know who moved between the two of you that it has come to such. You’re firm to say it isn’t you because your ass remains frozen, stiff as a board everytime Taehyung does so much as inhale. 

“Can you—” Taehyung clears his throat, pointing to the keyboard, “—move to the next one, please.”

You mutter an apology, pressing the right arrow and you see the photo move. Frankly, you aren’t paying attention. Not to anything, least of all the photos. It’ll be like knocking consciously on Hell’s door if you do pay attention. 

Because you can take being around Taehyung, you can easily detach yourself from reality when you are — and not feel anything, to look at him alone and think of him as an ex-friend, an ex-lover without the rest of the titles attached. But to look at the photos, the pictures you took, there’s no detaching from that reality. The reality that the man you had feelings for — might still have feelings for, but you push that thought back — is getting married, of all things. 

And you list this off as feeling weird, an ex marrying a cousin. You aren’t jealous, god, no. It’s just that — weird. Well, you think. 

“Okay, I can’t take this anymore,” Taehyung breathes and you still, unmoving as the statue on the corner of the room, “I’m going to order Chinese. I’m not going to last the rest of these photos if I don’t eat. Anything you want?” 

He might as well have slammed the mouse he’s holding with the way he casually lets it fall off from his hand to the table, leaning back on his chair and oh god, his head is leaning on the back of your chair. One move of your shoulder and the back of it will touch the side of his head. He has his phone over his head, elbows hanging in the air as he opens his phone with a click. He hums as he scrolls and this is so, so painfully domestic that you struggle to breathe. 

It’s been push and pull the whole night. He asks, you answer, and never the other way. 

Fifteen minutes that you’re plunged in deafening silence and you punch the air in your mind when Younha knocks, take-away bags at hand and a smile on her face. 

Taehyung hands you your food, places the utensils in neat order, pokes the straw through your bubble tea and gently places it in front of you and you stare. You stare because never in your life did you ever think you and Taehyung would ever be in this situation. Toeing around each other, walking on eggshells. 

There had been a time that silence wasn’t an option — it’s either you filled the quiet or he did; mouths off about Pokemon and stickers and dogs he met on a certain day, or silence filled with wordless communication through flesh and skin and heavy breaths. 

Never this — a fragile silence that no words could ever fill. But of course, Taehyung knows how to break that. Break you when he speaks, “I think we’ll have this one framed for the reception.”

You blink at the photo on the monitor, big and taunting. In it, Taehyung smiles, a wide rectangle stretch of his mouth as his chin rests on top of Soyeon’s head, the latter leaning her weight on Taehyung. It’s evident, palpable even, the happiness that’s shared between them. A running joke between the two of them captured on a permanent photograph only they can understand. 

“Yeah,” you nod, a smile, or an attempt at it, stretching your lips, “it’s beautiful. Definitely worthy for the reception. You can hang it in your home after.”

It’s an instinct – you’d like to believe so – when you feel Taehyung move beside you and you mindlessly mirror him, freezing the moment you take in the miniscule space that’s left as you both huddle to look at the monitor. A good couple inches you can count on one hand. And you refuse to move away because no, this is not at all affecting you. And it’s Taehyung, you justify, who’s currently invading your space. 

The third mistake is when you try to steal a glance at the corner of your eye because you think he’s engrossed with the picture. 

But then you see that he isn’t. Not when his stare locks with yours the moment your eyes move.  Had been on you all this time. 

The fourth is when he moves and you don’t. 

Not when his thumb brushes the corner of your mouth to wipe whatever it is he sees there. 

Not when he flashes you a smile – something so fond and warm and tender that renders you mute. 

Not when he succumbs to sleep an hour later, head lolling on your shoulder.

But the entire world moves when he stirs and the overhead lights hit something golden. It crumbles and caves beneath your feet when a locket falls out of the top of his loosely buttoned shirt. An identical locket to the one that now sits heavy on your chest – once heavy with the broken promises, but now empty of the love that first came with it.

You see his forehead wrinkle as he slowly wakes and you feel the start of the burn that first settles on your chest before it moves and starts from the corners of your eyes. You train your eyes on the monitor, fingers clicking away on the mouse and the keyboard faster than ever.

“I’m sorry,” you hear him say. His head stays on your shoulder as he speaks. “What time is it?” 

“Quarter before ten—”

“I missed you,” he breathes and you hear him let out a soft laugh before he whispers, “I always miss you.”

It feels as if all the air in your lungs has been knocked out and you turn to speak when you see that he’s fallen back asleep. And god, you wanted to shout at him, let out the years of pent up frustration and grudge you’ve had all these past years and ask all the unanswered whys and hows. But looking at him now, after so, so long, you realize you do too. 

A tear drops and a multitude of realizations follow. 

You missed him. You missed him. You miss him. 

And fuck, you’re still in love with him, you realize. So much and enough to make you not think of the consequences of the realization that you do.

Not when his fiancée finally comes and places a chaste kiss on his lips.

Not when a wedding invitation lands itself on the desk towards you.

And especially not when the ghost of him lingers when they’re gone and you find yourself praying for it to stay just a little bit longer.

You did not plan for your Friday night to be like this at all. 

The initial – and final – plan was this: show up to the club your sister wanted you to show up to, make it look like you’re genuinely happy to be there, flee the moment midnight hits when your sister and her friends are too drunk to realize you aren’t there anymore, and sleep away in the solace your tranquil and quiet apartment offers. 

The night and plan had been going well, much to your delight. 

Just until the fleeing part, that is. Because the moment you press the unlock button to your car half past one in the morning, you see a very drunk Kim Taehyung eagle spread on the hood of your car, with only a rumpled halfway-buttoned shirt that’s tucked into his pants, one of his shoes already on the roof of the Mercedes. 

And so instead of proceeding to the sleeping part of your plan, here you are now, struggling under the weight of Taehyung as you try to push in all his limbs in the passenger seat because he refuses to go away. Why, of all people, must you be the one to find him like this? Other people would’ve paid no mind leaving him on the pavement but of course, the universe had to make sure it just had to be you because old, cruel fate had it out for you and your demise.

Two weeks spent in isolation from the rest of the world in an attempt to justify and get over the realization you had of still being in love with an ex and the world just dumps him in the hood of your car of all cars. 

“Kim Taehyung, I am not above violence, I will fucking knock you out if I have to if you step your foot out and kick me once more, for the love of god,” you heave, “Are you with Jimin?”

At this, he grins and nods, eyes half-closed, “Jimin went home. I think. Or wait, maybe he’s passed out in Yoongi’s tub. I think. I don’t know, do you think he’s still here? Wait, do you know Jimin? How do you know Jimin?” 

You sigh, ��Give me your phone. I’ll get Soyeon to pick your ass up.”

Taehyung lets out a loud gasp, proceeds to choke on air before he looks up at you, “How do you know my girlfriend?” 

You pause for a second before rolling your eyes, “Phone.”

“It’s in my left pocket, can you get it for me? I’m so tired,” he whines, wincing as his head lands on the head rest. You reach over to pull his phone out, only to retrieve a pack of cigarettes but no phone. You freeze when his hand grips your wrist that’s still in his pocket, feeling your heartbeat in your ears when he leans forward, so close that you feel his breath on your cheek, “Butt pocket, sorry.” 

You take a deep breath as he continues to look at you with a grin. You move closer, angling your head away because you would be fucking cheek-to-cheek if you don’t and you pause just before you touch his back pocket, “No, you know what, you can get it yourself. Either that or I leave you out here on the streets.” 

Taehyung pouts but he moves his arm behind him nonetheless, proceeds to feel his other pocket when he finds the first one empty.

“My phone’s gone,” he huffs, “Oh! It’s in Minnie’s car!”

You let out a loud groan, rounding the car to open the driver’s side to look for your bag so you could use your phone and you let out another sound of frustration, louder this time, when you remember the picture of a beige bag being left underneath your couch’s pillow. You look over at Taehyung, a war in your head as to what to do with him, before you finally settle on the choice that you never, ever think you would’ve made. 

“Fine,” you grit as you turn the engine on, “I’m going to drop you off your house but I’m not gonna be held accountable for the reasons you’re going to have to explain to your girlfriend if she greets your drunk ass as to why the fuck her cousin’s dropping her fiance off, alright? Now, are you still staying in the same apartment ‘cause I’m going to drop you–”

Taehyung snores, body folding in on himself as he slightly shivers. You sigh, dropping your forehead on the steering wheel, enough to hurt and make the horn whine, “This is fucking unbelievable. I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

“Hey, Taehyung,” you shake him, poking his shoulders the way you know he hates, “Wake up and tell me your address, asshole. I’m not driving to the other side of the city only to find out you changed address. Hey.” 

He makes the tiniest wave of his arm before he goes back to sleep. 

You glance at the clock that says it’s now nearing three in the morning and you run your hands over your face because fuck this. 

Now, you head to your apartment with the plan of just dumping Taehyung in the foyer and letting him sleep there until he has his mind back in the morning – you figure he’d probably run off the minute he wakes up. 

“Hey, wake up.” You nudge him when you arrive and you sigh once more as he merely stirs, opening his side of the door before attempting to move out of the car only to heave when the seatbelt he still has on pulls him back.

With a grimace, you round to his side and lug one of his arms around your shoulders and basically carry all of his weight towards the elevator. You give a tight smile to the staff at the reception as you pass by, dismissing the offer of help. You nearly drop to your knees as soon as the elevator doors close, exhaustion flooding you all of a sudden. 

As soon as the door opens to the penthouse, you remove your hold on Taehyung and he slumps against the wall. You let out a breath before pushing him to one of the guest rooms where he immediately plops down on the bed after knocking his shoes off.�� A small smile plants itself on your face and you reach over to pull the covers over him. 

Kneeling down on the floor beside the bed, you brush off the loose hairs that cover his face and you whisper, “You’re making it so hard for me.”

Deciding that you’ve helped him enough, you head to your room to change and shower – a long bout of internal battle against yourself as you try to wash off all that happened. 

It is an hour later when you’re already in your bed, tossing and turning that you find yourself a long way from sleep, and so you push the covers off of you to head towards the kitchen to find something to drink. The sun is starting to rise, you see, as you stare at the large windows, uneasy at the thought that Taehyung is there. Here. 

And you know you shouldn’t care anymore. You’ve done enough and beyond to help him, you remind yourself. But that doesn’t matter, really, because here you are, pushing the guest room open to check on him, a bottle of water in hand. He remains as he was the second he got here and you sigh as you pull one of Jungkook’s shirt and sweatpants from the cabinet, a spare he leaves in the case he unintentionally sleeps over, and you walk towards Taehyung before slowly shaking him awake. 

“Hey,” you speak softly as his eyes crack open, mind still swimming in alcohol, “you should change into this. Your clothes must be uncomfortable to sleep in. Here’s some water too.” 

His eyes open a little bit wider, voice hoarse when he speaks, “(Y/N)?” 

You swallow, “Yeah, it’s me.” 

“I can’t remember most of tonight, how did I—”

You smile, “And you probably won’t remember all of this when you sleep once more. Just change and drink this, Taehyung.”

A part of why you’re doing all the things you’re doing is the fact that you know he will forget this. 

He sits up, swaying as he does so, twisting the water open. You greet him good night, and just as you turn to head back to sleep, his hand dart out to grip your wrist – as tight as the grip that has your heart beating so loud in your chest as he does, “I’m sorry.” 

Without turning around, you answer, “You don’t have to be. I would’ve done the same for anyone else.” 

“No, you wouldn’t have.” 

Pressing your tongue against your cheek, you rip your arm away from his hold, now turning around to face him. He slowly stands, eyes trained on you. You open your mouth to speak but he beats you to it, “I’m not saying sorry just because of tonight,” he speaks quietly, “This is an apology that’s long overdue. An apology I never had the courage to give you. An apology that I owe you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being the coward that walked away without an explanation. For not being the person I promised you I would be.”

“I told you,” you say through gritted teeth, “You don’t owe me an apology, Taehyung. It’s over and done with. Apologizing to me would mean that there’s still loose ends between us, and I’m telling you that there’s none. You may have burnt those ends the moment you walked away and I have burned mine in the years that followed. You don’t owe me anything.”

He’s closer now, so close that you feel yourself getting overwhelmed by the smell of alcohol and his perfume. “Then why are you still wearing this?” 

You feel all the walls come down, then, when his fingers trace the golden chain of the locket. The once emblem of young and promised love, of an oath, of Kim Taehyung. The necklace that never was once removed from you since then. 

You chuckle, bitter and harsh, “You’re still wearing it too, Kim.”

You flinch as you feel the pad of his thumb wipe away at the trail of tears that has somehow escaped, “Leaving you was the only choice I had then. It killed me to walk right out of that fucking door but it was the only choice. For you, for me, for us. Even if it meant me becoming the asshole, it was the only choice.” 

“Don’t feed me that bullshit, you left me. And in my vocabulary and everyone else’s, leaving the person you claim to love without a single explanation is a shit move,” you nearly damn snarled, “I could’ve accepted you telling me you didn’t love me anymore but you fucking walked out without a single word. Well, I guess it worked out great for you, huh? You’re getting married now.” 

“I did l—”

“Don’t fucking dare say it,” you sob, feeling all the energy draining out of you in a second, “You’re four years too late, Taehyung.”

The chains that hold all the hurt and grievance of the past four years had been unlocked and with the thought of Taehyung not being able to remember this tomorrow, you let it all out. 

“I lied,” you whisper, lips and chest shaking as you breathe, “It hurts me seeing you now. So fucking much. Because you never wanted to get married. I remember when we were together you said that we could live without the titles, the labels, and the technicalities of it all, because you’d love me the same. So yes, it hurts. I can’t deny that it does when the things you didn’t want with me, things I wanted to have with you, you learned to want with someone else. Shit like this hurts because even if I was okay without all the titles, I thought then that spending a lifetime with you wouldn’t be so bad. But you made it seem like you never wanted marriage, not with anyone ever and so I accepted it, content even with just being with you.”

“But then you show up like this,” you say so quietly you don’t know if he can hear it, “You can’t expect it not to hurt, Tae, because it does. So, so much.”

“I’m sorry,” Taehyung lightly rests his forehead on yours, “I’m so sorry.”

“Answer me this one question,” you look up at him, “Please.” 

You feel him nod, “Anything.”

You feel it again, the suffocating claws that grips around your chest, the pain of unanswered questions and doubts, “Was my love not enough for you?”

You feel it before you hear it, when he nods against your head, hands coming up to hold your cheeks, “No, no, god, no. It was more than enough. It was so much more than enough that you became someone who didn’t deserve someone who couldn’t reciprocate the amount of love you were giving me. I’m sorry.”

“I miss you, Tae.” You whisper, and you can barely see him through the tears, “And it’s so, so wrong and I shouldn’t be doing this but fuck, I do. Four years and I still miss you and now you’re here, back in my life, and yet you’re still the farthest you’ve ever been from me.”

Maybe it’s the realization that he is – so far away from you and will never be close enough anymore – that you think maybe this is the long-awaited end. The closure you’ve once longed for but never had. Maybe there really was no reason for him leaving you beyond the fact that he didn’t love you anymore – and maybe that was enough reason. You just didn’t want to accept that fact. Maybe it’s time that you do. 

After Taehyung, you’ve become someone who believed that love is something that’s easy to let go, when in fact, all this time, it is the love you had for Taehyung you’ve never let go of. And maybe, it was never love for the people that came after him and so it became easy for you once it’s over, once it ended. Because what has started that really counted has never reached its end, for you anyway. Because it will never be the same. 

Because they weren’t Kim Taehyung. 

“Don’t cry for me. I don’t deserve it,” he smiles a small smile as he wipes a tear away. 

“Then stop making me cry, asshole,” you softly retort, hands coming up to wrap around his own to pull them away from your face. You can’t think straight when he has his hands on you, “I’m not asking for you to love me again, not anymore. Maybe we could be friends?”

It’s a weak attempt at humor, you know. And you really don’t think you can be just friends with Taehyung. But you’re weak for Kim Taehyung and you’re still so fucking in love him that you’d settle for whatever there can be between the two of you. He doesn’t need to know the specifics.

“Can we, really?” He laughs softly, a sad smile appearing, “I’m about to do something very stupid, for the very last time, so please, stop me if you don’t want to because I don’t think I can stop myself.”

He leans forward as the inches between you decrease down to a zero, his lips pressing against your cheek, your forehead, your eyelid, and to the corner of your mouth before he pulls away. “No, you had something to drink too, I’m drunk, you’re drunk. I’m sorry, I don’t know what I was thinking, ” Taehyung breathes against your cheek, eyes shut tight. 

“I’m not.” 

Whether that’s an answer that refutes your state of intoxication or a statement that debunks Taehyung’s apology, you don’t know. Because the next moment finds you pulling him forward, arms snaking around his shoulders as you kiss him. Soft and unhurried and sad – a declaration of what had remained unsaid for the past years. 

The last time, you swear, and from tomorrow then on, you’re going to be friends. This night will be void – forgotten and discarded. Taehyung is going to continue with his life and you with yours. 

It’s so easy to become so lost in Taehyung that you forget the rest of the world. 

That you don’t hear the sound of the door opening. 

Or the second set of drunk footsteps that follows the first one.

“What in the fuck is going on here?”

[femdomlieeh]

Riding your thigh (m)

Sub!Monsta X ✧ Dom!Fem!Reader

WARNINGS—nsfw ✧ thigh-riding ✧ praising ✧ degrading ✧ dirty talk ✧ mentions of spanking, breath play & oral sex ✧ BDSM ✧ pet names (mommy, babyboy, puppy, princess)

NOW PLAYING—vampire ✧ Olivia Rodrigo

[A/N.] This is unedited and I wrote this a long time ago but I want to prioritize my time and energy on writing new fics instead like

M.LISTS—random idols/groups ✧ latest updates ✧ read on wp

All rights reserved © femdomlieeh

✧ ੈ ✧ ‧₊˚ * ੈ ✧‧₊˚＊* ੈ ✧‧₊˚＊

이호석 / wonho

Wonho's cheeks would puff up, as well as redden at your words. He likes it when you introduce new positions, and in return always acts all innocent with a flustered reaction as if he never knew those types of positions existed — but it's just an act. His cutie-like self would not question you at all; he'd smile and get on your lap without a word. To add more effect to his angel acting he'd maybe ask you about directions.

But once he got to action he no longer seemed like an innocent angel who didn't know what thigh-riding was. His hips would be grinding very seducingly — as if it were an erotic dance he'd practice for months — and his hands would be on your shoulders so there would be space between you so you could see him. He'd love to get praised. Praises would be motivating. This boy would love it so much he'd continue riding you even after cumming if you allowed him to. His stamina comes in handy.

"Should I take my clothes off or keep them on, Mami?"

After your answer he got on your thigh and sat down, ready for fun time.

"Am I doing this right, Mami?" he asked innocently, fully knowing he was a pro, because he wanted praise.

He will not admit that he's a dirty boy. No way. He'll still act like he's too pure to know what thigh-riding is, but every time he gets back on your lap he proves your theory of him being a freak to be true. Despite craving to ride your thigh again, he'll wait for you to tell him to do it instead of asking you. If you want to mess with him you can refrain from ever bringing it up. If you rile him up enough his innocent bubble might burst and he'll beg to get on your though again. Innocent angel? Pfft.

... ✧ ...✧✧✧✧✧✧

 손현우 / shownu

Hyunwoo's a softie, but he likes it rough. He knows that if he ever were to ride your thighs he wouldn't be able to go any different. Thus he'd be worried of actually getting off too hard on your thighs :C He'd be blushy and try to slow down, even if it wasn't enjoyable for him. You'd have to encourage him and grab his hips and physically make him ride your thigh harder and faster. After a while of seeing that you're completely fine, he'd get more comfortable and let loose of the tension he was previously feeling. The effort he'd put into it would be shocking since he's so shy and 'innocent'.

"B-But, Mama," he stuttered as his cheeks reddened.

"But what, Babybear?"

"I-I don't wanna hurt you," he looked down insecurely.

"You've been such a good boy this week, you deserve to get off on my thigh. Now listen to Mama and ride, okay?"

"Ye-Yes, Mama."

In the future, he would get flustered even at the mere mention of the first time he had ridden your thigh. And because of the embarrassment, he won't have the courage to ask you to do it again. If you asked him to do it again, however, he'd gladly do it (still blushing as if it were his first time, of course). He'd say he'd do it 'because he's a good boy', but the truth is that he had wanted to do it again ever since the first time.

Progressively, he'd feel more easy-going about it, and would muster up the courage to ask you if he could do it again. He'd be stuttering during the little speech that he had prepared beforehand and his face'd become red if you allow him to. Thigh-riding will only be occasional because it's his guilty pleasure and he feels abashed about asking you — but he'll give his all any time he does it. Take the first step for his sake.

✧... ✧ ...✧✧✧✧✧

이민혁 / minhyuk

Minhyuk is the human version of a puppy. He would get on your lap and hump you like there was no tomorrow. Boy has no shame and is always up for the dirty.

"Get on my lap."

"Okayyy~" he sang cutely.

Baam! In a second he was sitting comfortably on your lap like you ordered.

"Now ride it, Puppy."

He grinned.

"Okay, Mommyyy~"

Not caring enough to take time to dedress when he's horny, he'd be the one to do it fully clothed. You would maybe need to slow him down, because his great excitement would make him go crazy on your thigh. Guide him through it.

If he doesn't listen to you, give him a spank and he'll be sure to listen. After a while into it, he'd take off his shirt or drag down his collar so you could give him some hickeys. Your attention and affection is important to him. Your hands guiding and caressing his body, your lips and teeth nibbling on his purple skin would be the only way to get him to cum.

"This is so much fun, Mommy," he moaned and arched his back at the sensation.

He threw his head further back to give you more access to his neck. Panting, he managed to say what he wanted the most during that moment: "M-Mark me, Mommy. Please, please, please—"

He will act like such an adorable and good boy for you if it means that he can ride your thigh in the end. From calling you Mommy in sweet scenarios to giving you head without wanting anything in return — he'll do everything to prove that he deserves it. He'll love to do it randomly too. Imagine watching a movie with him on your lap and he suddenly starts grinding slowly on you and whimpers out pleads.

✧✧... ✧ ...✧✧✧✧

유기현 / kihyun

Kihyun's eyes would pop out. He'd be shocked people even do that, because he's a pure, holy child of God. It wouldn't take long until the stupefaction would turn into shyness. He'd be so flustered and ask you if he heard you right just to make sure his brain hadn't messed with him. Oh boy would he become even redder after you confirmed he'd heard you right. You'd have to lead him through the whole process or else he'd just sloppily ride you with insecure thoughts hunting him. In a very foreign situation like this one he'd need you to tell him what he should do and what he shouldn't do.

He'd be very obedient and would flush at any compliment you gave him, but on the inside he'd feel very sexy and confident in himself at the praising. By the end of it he'd be back to being pure and holy and would deny that it was indeed very pleasant to ride your thigh. But when you two'd go to sleep that night he wouldn't be able to stop thinking of it as he reluctantly smiled.

"You want me to w-wHat?"

"Ride my thigh."

"A-Are you for sure?"

"Yes. Now."

"I— Uhm— Okay—"

Sheepishly he followed through your command.

"Good boy."

"T-Thank you, M-Mommy."

He will never admit that it feels good. The only time he ever could go against himself and actually admit he was into it will be when he's very, very, very needy for your thigh — which is very rare. But you could also find out that he's into it if you find him watching thigh-riding porn, which by the way would result in him not being able to look you in the eyes for at least a week. It'll be better for you both if he himself tells you that he likes it. And if he does decide to tell you one day, he'll expect you guys to start doing it often.

✧✧✧... ✧ ...✧✧✧

채형원 / hyungwon

Hyungwon would get on your lap and look you in the eyes confidently. He's often sassy and shit, but in the bedroom his missions are to impress you and satisfy you — he'd still be a power bottom, but he'd be a nice, not-too-bratty one. You'd have to grab his butt with one hand and choke him with the other, or else he'd physically bring your hands to where they should be. If you called him something other than Princess he'd tell you off. He's the definition of thigh-riding Princess. Since he wants to be a good Princess he'd need you to tell him he is one.

If you didn't praise him enough he'd think he didn't do good. But he wouldn't become sad about it, instead he'd ask you for guidance. By the end of the session he'd be tired and want the Princess treatment — cuddle him and let him sleep on top of you.

"Wanna take a ride?" you asked and patted your thigh.

"Of course, Mommy."

He made his way to you and plumped down on you, putting his ass out in an arch.

"This—" he looks down at your lap and up into your eyes, "—This is my throne."

He will start sitting on your lap more often. Both because he wants some lovey-dovey time and because he wants come touchy-touchy time. If it's the latter he wants, he'll move a little against you to send you signals of what mood he is in, even if it makes him a bad Princess. Another occasion he'd sit on your lap would be when he's jealous and wants to show that he obviously is your Princess. Back to the thigh-riding, he'll make it your routine to do it at least once a week, because it's his favorite form of masturbation.

✧✧✧✧... ✧ ...✧✧

이주헌 / joohoney

Jooheon would love the idea as soon as it went past your lips. He's always up for anything Mommy wants. But he'd feel like he needed to put on a show for you and would thereof feel pressured to be good enough for you. Confidentally, he'd get on your thigh, but when it came to actually riding you thigh he wouldn't be as confident since it's his first time doing it on you.

He'd try his best and be as cute for you as possible, moaning out your name, telling you how much he appreciates you, pecking your neck as he hides in it — everything to prove to you that he loves you. If you say something filthy in return he'd keep his head on your shoulder and wouldn't look at you for a while out of embarrassment. If you praised him cutely, however, he'd get giggly and encouraged to continue showing how much of a good boy he is for you. He'd be so exhausted after he cummed, because of how much work he put into it. You better give him nice aftercare.

"Your thigh is so nice, Mommy," he whimpered out.

"You're doing so good, Honey. Only you can look this pretty riding my thigh."

With deeper dimples from smiling, he fastened his pace.

At first he'll only do it if you encourage him to, because then he knows you like it too. Eventually after you've requested to do it a couple more times, he'll become confident and start surprising you every now and then. It'll both be sexy and cutie time. He'll be able to make thigh-riding cute with his small whines at your praises and with his fluffy hair sticking to his forehead. If you don't cuddle afterwards he'll become pouty and cross his arms until you hug and kiss him.

✧✧✧✧✧... ✧ ...✧

임창견 / i.m

Changkyun would be like 'finally she asked me'. Like this is something he's wanted to do for so long. No matter how cute he is, he is not innocent at all. Just the thought of rubbing himself against your thigh, whilst looking into your eyes, and moaning for you turns him on. He'd be a little bratty at first, because you didn't want to do it earlier on in the relationship.

Out of all the boys he'd be the one most likely to ask you if you two could do it. Anyway, he'd be a soft boy and would want affection such as kissing, touching, or just praising words, from you at all times. He'd also love it if you helped him by keeping your hands on his hips or if you grinded your thigh up against him. After cumming he'd stop being whiny and would instead be fully satisfied.

"Took you long enough, Mommy."

"What do you mean?"

"I basically live on your lap. I want to be on your lap all the time, Mommy. Whether it's for cuddling or humping," he whined and pouted dramatically with crossed arms.

"Come here, my Babyboy," you said and opened your arms for him.

He kept arms crossed but still listened to you.

"Show me what you want to do on my thigh," you whispered and pecked his pout.

His pout turned into a dimpled smile.

"Okay then, Mommy," he whined softly.

Oh how he was going to enjoy every single moment of it.

He'll ask you to do it again for sure. He's very submissive and baby-like and isn't ashamed of himself or his sexual preferences. If you denied him he'd be all pouty and whiny, and would complain along the lines of 'But I've been a good boy~' and 'Why not, Mommy? I thought you loved me.' Let him ride you for fuck's sake. He's a good boy and he deserves it. He also deserves the best cuddle sessions afterwards.

✧✧✧✧✧✧... ✧ ...

❝ And every girl I ever talked to told me you were bad, bad news

You called them crazy, God, I hate the way I called them crazy too

(...)

Went for me, and not her

'Cause girls your age know better ❞

—olivia isabel rodrigo; 2023

[lucidrims]

            "  let's  face  it,  not  even  camo  pants  can  help  hide  you.  at  this  rate,  i  need  to  order  a  full-on  camo  suit  -  fake  grass  and  all.  "  she  calls  back  out  from  the  other  side  of  the  door  while  changing,  just  listening  to  her  fiancé  babble  away  about  the  outfit  he  picked  for  her.  bomi's  laugh  echoes  through  the  bathroom  at  his  inquiry,  "  hmmm,  i'll  think  about  it  !  "  as  much  as  she's  in  a  joking  mood,  the  thought  of  that  made  her  nervous  as  she's  never  bared  it  all  for  anyone  before,  "  maybe  !  if  you  play  your  cards  right.  "  opening  the  door  to  the  bathroom  finally,  fully-clothed,  flashing  him  a  grin,  "  but  you  missed  your  window  of  opportunity  for  now  ~  "  keeping  up  the  playful  exchange,  bomi  twirls  around,  "  does  this  look  good  ?  i  need  to  thank  your  mom  for  picking  such  great  pieces  and  packing  for  me.  "  maintaining  the  light  atmosphere,  she  gathers  her  belongings  into  a  smaller  bag,  wrapping  her  arm  around  his  naturally,  "  let's  go  ?  "

 letting  out  a  playful  groan  as  he  watched  bomi  dart  toward  the  bathroom,  a  grin  spreading  across  his  face.  ❛  you  really  are  a  little  troublemaker,  aren't  you  ?  ❜  he  called  after  her,  shaking  his  head.  he  glanced  down  at  the  camo  jeans  and  tank  top  she  had  handed  to  him,  a  smirk  tugging  at  his  lips.  ❛  camo  ?  you  want  me  blending  in  with  the  scenery,  huh  ?  maybe  you  are  secretly  trying  to  hide  me  from  all  the  attention  i  usually  get  !  ❜  he  teased,  raising  his  voice  so  she  could  hear  him  from  the  bathroom.  he  stepped  back  and  started  putting  on  the  clothes  she  picked.  ❛  i'm  sure  no  one  will  mistake  me  for  a  landmark.  ❜  he  laughed,  pulling  on  the  pants.  ❛  unless  you  plan  to  add  a  glowing  light  or  two  to  complete  the  eiffel  tower  look  !  ❜  pausing  for  a  moment,  he  knocked  on  the  bathroom  door,  teasing  again.  ❛  are  you  sure  you  are  not  going  to  pop  out  here  for  a  quick  peek  ?  i  mean,  you  already  suggested  it  ..  ❜  he  grinned,  knowing  bomi  would  find  a  way  to  keep  the  banter  going.  ❛  can  i  see  you  naked  though  ?  ❜

[sminiac]

hi bub! hope ur doing well~ do you have any hcs for making out with xikers?

💌 — Hi my sweets ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა‎ !! I am doing well, hope you are too !!<3 and ofc I have some, just for you!

⋆ K. Minjae

He’s very ‘mine, mine, mine!’ when he’s able to just relax into your kisses, which he thinks of as kind of rare, so it’s quite the delicacy. At first he’s very quick tongued and eager, bordering impatient once you have the time to sink into each-others presence without a jarring disturbance, because of this his hands can move quite roughly, careless almost, he’s just so used to running high on a lot of you and not so much time. Wants to feel you up, wants you on him, everything, and normally you’d soften under his skin and allow him to move as he wants, but sometimes he needs a good reminder that he’s not always needed somewhere by someone else. I peg him as someone who is really good at kissing and not needing/wanting anything more, his self control is just mwah!

⋆ P. Junmin

Everything about him is so soft and patient, a meek thing when you’ve got him under your spell, which seems to be all the time- warming him up until he’s impossibly pliable when you’ve set a pace, established habits that he’s cutely trained to keep note of, some he can already wade through without taking the time to bear in mind the pattern beforehand. He knows how many beats to wait until you’re tilting your head to the opposite side of his so the transition is flawless, knows how to keep himself close and open for you without blocking your air. Sweet boy! He’s just so polite ???? Very hesitant with making noise and moving his hands to rest on places other than your waist, or face, so you’ve got to show him a little direction with it!

⋆ C. Sumin

A complete and utter sucker for feeling you up underneath your clothes, and I do mean his hands being on your skin, of course, but,, he’d also like toying with the band of your bra/panties just to tease you, frequently slips the pad of his finger under the band just to run against it. Needs to keep himself physically stimulated so he can focus on the task at hand, if he doesn’t then he’s so hurried in getting you undressed, it’s just so hard to kiss only your lips when you’re so pretty and smell so good, making the soft sounds you do whenever his tongue is playing with yours. Really likes the feeling of your bottom lip being softly bitten between his teeth and sucking on your tongue— really really likes when you suck on his, has the prettiest smile when he can faintly see your pretty lips wrapped around the length of the wet muscle.

⋆ H. Jinsik

#1 gum stealer, and smiler. You just make him so giddy he can’t stop it, sometimes he’ll even laugh a little, it’s never intentional, and he swears that he never feels the big grin that strains his cheeks until it hurts, only when you’re pulling away does he suddenly start to feel how sore his face is, but how could he ever care about being in pain when you’re kissing him in every and all the right ways possible? When he’s feeling a little emotional, more sentimental, the kisses are reduced to a slower pace, the passion and emotion is all still there, just more intensified due to how much he feels his emotions. Cradles your face so gently while simultaneously keeping you as close to him as possible, sometimes tears will slip due to how full he is with your love, how grateful he is for it, other times he starts getting chatty, he just needs you to hear how happy he is, don’t be surprised if a mix of both happen.

⋆ C. Hyunwoo

#1 HATER of chaste pecks on the lips. EVER. Will actually become upset if it’s done more than a few times, now the first few he’ll let slide, he knows how to be lenient, but don’t let it happen too often because then you’ll really start thinking hard about how he should’ve considered an acting career before debuting. He just loooves being dramatic and incredibly loud, lucky for you! making out just so happens to be his favourite! Shuts up immediately when you’re situating yourself in his lap every single time, admittedly he’s still a little shocked by how easily you give in to him, to the point where he forgets about you literally being his girlfriend and he’s just kind of like “Oh!😃” when you’re pulling him into you. A huge fan of hickey’s, giving them, receiving, likes breaking from the kiss so his hands can feel you up and he can suck a mark into your skin wherever he pleases. He’s also so vocal when making out, doesn’t spare you any of the sounds he’s capable of making.

[redrandomposts]

hey 🌻~! I saw that you might have forgotten to anonymize your post, so i decided to copy+paste it here... if it wasn't a mistake or you'd like to send in the ask again, then i'll c+p my response and put it there instead! srry i didn't respond earlier, either, i had to study..

hey me 🌻 again! I had a few thoughts about the Till raising his and tills test tube kid- firstly I think despite the fact that Ivan had no part in the kids actual conception Till would tell the kid all about his “father” kind of in the way one would talk about a dead spouse. he would make comments whenever the kid would do things Ivan used to do- and tell stories from their childhood, so Ivan feels like an active presence in their lives. Eventually the kid gets very skilled at drawing and as a gift on their parents anniversary (the anniversary of round 6) the kid draws a beautiful picture of their family- one that includes a smiling Ivan standing beside till- and it becomes tills prized possession- And maybe over time the kid gets into the habit of sketching Ivan into scenes of their family, movie nights in the couch show Ivan tucked into the corner holding them both close, pictures of them cooking in the kitchen show Ivan taking something out of the oven, and in a way despite the fact that he was long dead before the kid was ever born he feels as close as any parent. (And obviously people are worried about what this is doing to the kid emotionally- having such a clear reminder of their loss in their faces every day but it seems to be helping Till heal so they can’t begrudge him this small comfort) And then I was thinking that as time went on Till might start thinking of Ivan as a lost love, one he didn’t realize was love at the time but was love nonetheless. And as time goes on he becomes more and more comfortable with the idea that what they could have had together was love, and that despite the fact that Ivan is gone Till loves him now. The till that is far wiser in his age and experience can see that relationship in a new light and falls for Ivan all over again. (And they probably have a little shrine/memorial in their hose that till will talk to when when he thinks their kid isn’t looking so he can keep Ivan up to date about how their kid is doing.) And then I was thinking their afterlife reunion in this au would be so good!! Cause Till has been in love with Ivan for decades by the time he passes away of old age so he’s been waiting to get to see Ivan again for so long- but Ivan has NO CLUE that till has spent the last 50 years loving him relentlessly so till walks up to Ivan and is like “I’m sorry I kept you waiting so long my love 🥰” while holding his face and poor Ivan is like “EXCUSE ME IM YOUR WHAT-“ and I think it would be such a fun twist on their usual dynamic to have till be the openly romantic and forward one and Ivan be all flustered <3 Thank u for always having such fun concepts to think about!!! I literally haven’t written this much in months lol

this concept came from an ask, so it's not necessarily mine... only the parts i've added onto it can be considered mine; that's the same for any other asks i get btw!

honestly the afterlife reunion would be wild. would they age in the afterlife? what form do they take on; the one they desire, the one they see themselves in, etc... imagine a seventy-year-old till, a 22 yo ivan, and a kid that's like... 30. lmaoooo. the thought that they can't watch the living also makes it kind of... sad. imagine sua and ivan waiting there for decades, maybe hyunwoo too, for mizi, till, and hyuna respectively (...maybe luka. if hyunwoo wanted to see luka for whatever reason). and ivan not telling sua the exact details of his comp so she won't make fun of him?

in some cultures you can send items to the dead by burning it. so like. what if the child and till sent letters, drawings and paintings, music sheets, etc. to ivan through that and ivan's recieving all of it, kind of confused ("since when did i have a kid?"), thinking that maybe it's a gimmick of some sort. there'll be tear smudges on till's paper, conveniently blurring till's confessions of love, so it remains a surprise...

how did this become a consideration of afterlife ivan and living till again?

[lucidrims]

            "  always  knew  you  had  a  crush  on  me.  "  can't  stop  himself  from  being  -  well,  himself,  hyunki  laughs  heartily,  "  i'm  kidding,  i  mean  -  i  had  an  idea  ?  but  i  was  afraid  i  was  reading  into  it  too  much.  "  having  no  strength  still  to  move  or  dress  himself,  he  sprawls  out  on  hyunwoo's  bed,  listening  very  closely  to  what  he  had  to  say,  happy  to  have  heard  from  his  side.  "  i  also  don't  think  there's  a  need  for  us  to  rush  anything.  let's  just  .  .  have  fun  and  enjoy  what  we  have.  "  not  that  it  was  all  he  wanted  from  the  other,  so  he  makes  sure  to  add  some  more,  "  what  i  mean  is,  we  don't  have  to  talk  about  where  we  go  from  here  if  you  don't  want  to  ?  just  know  that  from  my  end,  i  wouldn't  have  risked  doing  that  -  risking  our  friendship,  if  i  didn't  have  feelings  for  you.  "  making  sure  that  he  makes  it  clear,  gazing  at  hyunwoo  longingly,  "  ah,  i  want  to  kiss  you  again,  fuck  .  .  what's  wrong  with  me  .  .  "  he  laughs  off  the  embarrassment,  licking  his  lips  unconsciously  as  if  wanting  to  taste  what's  left  of  his  best  friend  there.

 hyunwoo  feels  a  warmth  spread  through  his  chest  at  hyunki's  words,  a  mix  of  relief  and  something  deeper  swirling  within  him.  he  turns  slightly  to  face  hyunki,  catching  a  glimpse  of  the  blush  on  his  cheeks,  and  can't  help  but  smile  back,  the  weight  of  unspoken  feelings  pressing  against  the  edges  of  their  silence.  ❛  yeah,  it  feels  ..  different  now,  doesn't  it.  ❜  he  replies  softly,  his  voice  barely  above  a  whisper  as  if  afraid  to  disturb  the  fragile  moment  they'd  just  created.  hyunwoo's  heart  races  at  the  thought  of  how  everything  has  shifted  between  them,  the  air  thick  with  possibilities  yet  to  be  explored.  ❛  i  have  wanted  this  for  a  long  time.  ❜  he  continues,  his  gaze  locked  onto  hyunki's,  vulnerability  shining  through.  ❛  but  i  don't  want  to  rush  anything,  let's  just  take  it  one  step  at  a  time.  ❜  as  they  sit  in  comfortable  tension,  the  movie  flickering  in  the  background,  hyunwoo  knows  that  whatever  comes  next,  they  would  get  through  it  together.

[chiiyuuvv]

▪︎I M A G I N E S 🍡

(d for drabble, f for full length)

MINJAE ♡

Car ride (f)

Astraphobia (d)

Soft thoughts (d)

Ramen (d, slightly longer)

Minjae soft hour

Photo booth

JUNMIN ♡

Sick (d)

Jealousy (f)

SUMIN ♡

The street rapper (f)

Get up (d)

Fever (d)

Sugar rush rush sugar rush rush ahh (d)

Massage (f)

JINSIK ♡

Music Dat- Park (f)

HYUNWOO ♡

Movie (f)

Lunging in love (d)

Bf!hyunwoo thoughts (d)

JUNGHOON ♡

"..I'll just have to kiss you." (d)

Concert confession (d)

Bf!junghoon thought (d)

Cinema (d)

SEEUN ♡

Pranks (f)

Wake (d)

Convenient store (f)

YUJUN ♡

YUJUN BIRTHDAY IMAGINE (f)

YUJUN SPEICAL BIRTHDAY DRABBLE (f)

Academic rival (f)

No need to hide (d? Lightly longer)

Soft thoughts (d)

HUNTER ♡

Picnic (f)

Shooting star (d)

Period (d)

Kissable (d)

HUNTER BIRTHDAY IMAGINE (f)

HUNTER SPECIAL BIRTHDAY DRABBLE (d)

Suggestive hunter thought (d)

Hunter thought (d)

Christmas hunter (d)

Hunter

YECHAN ♡

Sleepover (f)

Cut (mentions of blood) (d)

Realization (f)

☆ H E A D C A N O N S 💫

°• BASED OFF OF.. 🍬

(All imagines are drabbles)

《 WHEN THEY LIKE YOU 》

seeun

seeun pt. 2

《 XIKERS LATE HOURS 》

minjae

jinsik

hunter

seeun

yujun

《 HANGING OUT WITH XIKERS 》

junghoon

jinsik

《 WHEN YOU'RE ON YOU'RE PERIOD 》

sumin

jinsik

seeun

junghoon

hyunwoo

《 HOW XIKERS WOULD COMFORT YOU 》

hyunwoo

jinsik

《 XIKERS FIRST KISS 》

jinsik

《 "IMAGINE IF WE'RE DATING" 》

junghoon

hunter

Wanna request something?

Just shoot me an ask! All I need is the member, plot/idea, and a song of your choosing (optional). Your request will be in line, and should be released a few days later. (depends on how long the line is)

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Requests are currently open.

Your request should (if meeting the guidelines) be in place! Please be patient when waiting and thank you for supporting me <3

JOIN THE TAGLIST!

[havemercedes]

okay but what if haein becomes the one to save hyunwoo because (a) she literally warned eunsung not to provoke her again; (b) her viciousness is really underutilized; (c) es not only framed hyunwoo but locked him up and separated my girl from the love of her life; and (d) I'd love to see haein go ballistic on that mf

(but probably won't happen)

[shakingparadigm]

For the ask game: Hyuna!!🔥

HI TOON THANK YOU!!

favorite thing about them:

Man, what's not to like... she's just a fantastic character all around, probably the most likeable character in my personal opinion! I love her perserverance and her incredibly strong sense of self. Her character design is also just so incredible, probably the most unique and distinct character in the cast (shades?? almost 6ft?? abs??? a prosthetic leg???)

She's just so badass.... save me noona......

least favorite thing about them:

I don't really have anything that I dislike about Hyuna honestly. Maybe a cause of concern would be her habits of drinking and smoking but hey she's grown and reclaiming her freedom so really she can do whatever she wants with her life!

favorite line:

This might be a weird one but "A bird is set free​" from All-In has always stood out to me. It carries a certain feeling and just perfectly encapsulates Hyuna. The shot that's presented during this line is one of my favorite Hyuna frames too.

(Honorable Mention: "c-cheers!" man I love Hyuna.)

brOTP:

MIZI AND TILL!!! I love the idea of Till acting as an adopted little brother to Hyuna (is this a Hyunwoo coping mechanism? Who knows). Of course her fellow rebels Dewey and Isaac as well! I also think Hyuna and Ivan would get along (suprisingly enough). She'd have a hard time figuring him out at first, but eventually they'd warm up to each other and probably be gym buddies or something.

OTP:

Hyuluka is the given of course since they're paired together.... while I don't have any particularly strong feelings about it in a romantic sense I find their relationship incredibly interesting to analyze and think about. Hyuluka and Ivantill are really in the same boat of obssessive perfect guy x rebel who does not like them back 😭

A ship that I genuinely do find adorable (and super underrated) is offrec/actor Hyuluka!! Offrec Luka seems much more chill and down-to-earth but also kinda jaded because he had to go through the whole idol thing which he hated. Offrec Hyuna is bright, innocent and the youngest of the cast which I find really cute.... there's this one offrec fancomic I like where Luka gets flustered because Hyuna approached him and then immediately deflating when he finds out she just wanted an autograph 😭 cute

nOTP:

Honestly haven't seen many other Hyuna ships besides Hyuluka.

random headcanon:

Hyuna has accidentally seriously fucked people over with her voice mimicry talent. At one point she was begged to stop doing it because she kept freaking people out.

unpopular opinion:

Okay, this one is a bit long and kind of less an opinion and more of a story, but I will admit that at first I really did not like All-In. LISTEN TO ME OKAY SAVE THE GUILLOTINE FOR LATER.

I fell off of Alien Stage after ROUND 5. I saw ROUND 1 and ROUND 2 and while I found them interesting, I didn't really think about them that much. ROUND 5 was the only one that caught my attention enough for me to come back to the video maybe 4 or 5 times after my first watch, even searching about Alien Stage on social media and stuff. Still, I wasn't too invested yet.

When I saw All-In freshly released on my Youtube page I was like "oh hey it's this thing again. there's a new one? okay" and out of curiosity I watched it.

I don't know what it was, but something about All-In just did not click with me at first 😭 I remember feeling as though it sounded kind of dissonant? Like something was a bit off with the instrumental, maybe it sounded a little low in volume or something. The rhythm of the song threw me off a little and I could not for the life of me explain why. This is purely personal by the way, I'm no professional music analyst or anything, it just seemed weird to me personally at first.

But that's the thing. Because I found it so strangely off, I kept coming back to the video (it helped that the visuals were absolutely banging). Everytime it showed up on my homepage I would just sit there and watch it entranced like a zombie and I couldn't even explain why. At one point I woke up at 1AM, opened my phone, and watched All-In completely unmoving expressionless unblinking in the dark of my room, then shut the phone off and immediately knocked out again. Once again I cannot explain this. That video had me in an absolute chokehold no joke. Eventually I started to understand it more and it really grew on me, to the point where I played it in the shower on loop and then proceeded to start the rest of my days with the damn thing. I began to get curious about the deeper aspects of Alien Stage, took the plunge, and now we're here.

Anyways, that's the story of how my opinion on All-In went from "this sounds kinda off" to "this is the best thing to ever be created by human hands". All-In is now one of my most favorite ALNST songs and Hyuna absolutely killed it in her debut video. Sorry I couldn't understand the true extent of your genius back then queen, but at least I do now.

song i associate with them:

Eight by Sleeping At Last

When I see fragile things, helpless things, broken things,

I see the familiar

I was little, I was weak, I was perfect, too

Now I'm a broken mirror

But I can't let you see all that I have to lose

All I've lost in the fight to protect it

I can't let you in, I swore never again

I can't afford to let myself be blindsided

favorite picture of them:

It's come to my attention that Hyuna was being taken away by the guards. I didn't notice because she just looked so cool in this shot 😭

[xikerriess]

Birthday, C. Hyunwoo

choi hyunwoo x reader

genre: fluff

warnings: nopee

I swear that i'm gonna start hating this man if he keeps being TOO PERFECT 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I walked to the park near my house. Since I was a little girl I had gone there every afternoon with my grandmother, although I had been able to go alone for years, and that day was no exception. I tucked my book under my arm as I untangled the headphones from my music player. It was pleasant weather, worthy of autumn, to be honest. It wasn't too cold, but a slight breeze whipped the faces of the people passing by.

As I arrived at the park, I watched as several children, including my little brother, made big piles of dry leaves and jumped on them. After greeting him, I settled down on one of the wooden benches and took out my book to continue reading where I had left off. I was so immersed in the book that I didn't notice someone trying to get my attention. I removed an earpiece from my ear to hear him better.

"Excuse me, do you mind if I sit here?" A tall boy, who looked to be about my age, pointed to a free space next to me with a shy smile.

"No, it's fine" He thanked me with another smile, identical to the previous one. The boy opened his book and we both continued our reading.

I sat there for more than two hours, during which time the boy, whose hair was a bit dishevelled by the wind, hadn't moved either. Finally, I decided to get up and go and look for my brother, who had been playing with the rest of his friends for quite some time. Noticing my movement, the young man noticed me.

"I'm Hyunwoo" He said, before I left.

"I'm Yn" Then he gave me another smile - he liked to smile so much - and turned his attention back to his book.

From that day on, the smiling boy kept appearing in that park, always sitting next to me with a new book, until that day, when his routine changed a bit.

My brother had fallen off a slide and wouldn't stop crying, so I had to leave my comfortable state to help him, leaving my book and my music player on the bench.

It turned out that my brother had broken his wrist and, as much as I insisted on not going to the park for at least that week, he ignored me and I had to accompany him.

This time Hyunwoo was already sitting on the bench, looking for something - or rather someone - with his eyes, which ended up meeting mine. He smiled and walked over to me.

"Is your brother well?" He asked once he was in front of me. I laughed.

"As if nothing happened, look at him. If he falls again I'm not taking him to the hospital..."

"Come on, don't be so harsh. I was the same when I was his age!" He said, chuckling. "Oh, by the way... You forgot this the other day " He said, holding out my book and music player to me. "You have good taste, in music, I mean" I, surprised, made him a proposal. "Then, do you feel like sharing?" I questioned, offering him one of my headphones. "If you don't mind..."

And so we spent several weeks, simply in each other's company. But there was a problem, and that was that the smiley boy made me nervous, very nervous. But not in a bad way. Well, yes... No! I don't even know what I'm saying. I just knew that his mere company made my head spin a thousand times. The so-called 'butterflies', which I felt more like knives digging into my stomach, didn't seem to want to leave every time I thought about him. And of course, after so much overthinking, I came to the conclusion that I liked him, a lot, and there was nothing I could do to get rid of the feeling.

And something I didn't know at the time was that Hyunwoo seemed to feel the same way but, unlike me, he already had a plan in mind.

•°•°•°•

My birthday came earlier than expected, but since I didn't plan to do anything, I wasn't too worried.

I continued with my usual routine, which meant seeing Hyunwoo again. And really, if I thought my feelings for him were strong before, they were even stronger now. We had been doing the same old routine for almost five months, and he didn't seem to get tired at all.

When I reached the usual bench, I noticed how my friend quickly hid something behind his back as he waved at me with one hand.

"Happy birthday, Yn!" He congratulated me, patting me on the head.

"How do you know it's my birthday today?" I asked, surprised.

"Well... A little birdie told me..." He laughed, finally pulling out what he was hiding behind his back.

"This is for you" He said, handing me a wrapped package.

"You didn't have to..." I thanked, happy. He waved his hand. When I removed the colourful wrapping, I was confronted with a cover that read 'Love and other words'. As I was turning the pages of the book, I came across a page with a few sentences marked on it, which read as follows:

''Favorite word?' he whispers.

I don't even hesitate: 'You' ''.

I looked at Hyunwoo in astonishment at what I had just found. He looked at me fearfully, like when a child is being scolded by his father.

"Soo, do you like it?" He asked in a kind of whisper.

"I love it" Said I, with the biggest smile in my face.

"Oh, God. I thought I wasn't going to make it!" He exclaimed, relieved. "In that case, this is yours too" And then she held out a small bouquet of flowers, paniculatas, to be more precise, with a ribbon holding them together.

"I like you, Yn" He confessed, with a smile, just like the one he gave me the day we met.

"I hadn't noticed" I said, sarcastic. "I like you too, Hyunwoo" And I gave him a hug, hiding my head in the crook of his neck.

Definitely the best birthday ever.

[breezybangtanbebe]

Play it Cool: Hyunwoo x Jooheon ❤️‍🔥

A/N: yall ever watch those off-the-wall scenarios/plots in porn where the pizza guy delivers pizza to a sexy lonely lady's house and they end up fucking? Well yea...here you go lmao might be a little long to get the tension just right but I always try to make it worth it in the end🌚

6.2k words

Knock.

Knock.

You folded the top corner of the page you were reading, exhaling tiredly as you set it aside.

A bead of sweat dripped from your brow and you could feel the hairs at your nape sticking to the back of your neck.

"Ugh..." you exhaled as you trudged barefoot across the floor, switching your hips attitudinally.

The forecast for today predicted it to be the hottest of the season with a heat index of 124° F.

In other words...

It was hot as fuck.

"Please be the A/C people, please please please.." you pleaded under your breath as you neared the front of your house.

You open the door quickly with a clear scowl of discomfort, only to find a man standing on your porch.

More like a speciMAN.

Legs. That's all you could see at first since you started scanning him from large booted feet. The dark jeans he wore seemed to go on forever until reaching his belted waist.

He's wearing a collared navy shirt with the company logo embroidered over the left breast with the buttons undone just below his clavicle.

It fits him nicely, hugging the bulge of his biceps and shoulders as he shrugged his work bag higher by the strap.

His complexion was fair but slightly kissed by the blazing sun that caused a shiny sheen on the surface of his skin.

His jawline was sharp and chiseled and his boyishly cut hair was a soft brown that complimented his youthful appearance. But you could tell he was around your age or older from the maturity in his stance.

His eyes are small and intense, his brow sharp and slightly intimidating as he regarded you with blank professionalism.

"Hi...we got a service call for a broken air conditioner," he says casually, perking his brow.

The look on your face could have been mistaken for the early signs of a stroke, dazed and unresponsive but you quickly gather your wits with a few blinks.

"Um...yeah..yes. Yes! I...I called. Because you're hot."

The repairman's other brow shoots up at your candor and all of the blood drains from your features at his expression.

Well, he was.

"I mean..ITS hot..the weather..whew...Global warming huh? Sheesh.." you backpedaled and his lips spread into a mildly amused smirk.

"Right." he nods. You wordlessly step back so he could enter your house and as he does, you notice another male in uniform at the repair van parked near the curb.

He seems to be gathering tools from the back of the vehicle, scowling from the heat, and focusing on his task.

The upper half of his face is hidden by the hat his hat that's pulled low over his brow but from the way he looked in his untucked uniform shirt, you could tell he was attractive as well.

"Oh lord..." you said to yourself, suddenly aware of how unkempt you probably looked in your sweated-through tank top and shorts. But to be fair, you were literally in there cooking, and wearing anything more would result in instant death.

But damn...why did they both have to be fine?

"Oh, and my name is Hyunwoo by the way. My partner Jooheon is outside gathering the rest of the tools we'll need to assess the issue. Where is your unit located?" He pauses to say, looking at you over his shoulder.

"Oh..um outside. On the side of the house." You respond and Hyunwoo nods in understanding.

His gaze lingers on you for more than a few seconds, dropping just below your neckline briefly before turning away. It's subtle but enough to make something in your tummy flutter like an idiot.

Well, you were sort of half dressed but who could blame you?

"Cool...It does feel pretty stuffy in here. Is there a way for us to access your attic? To check your insulation and freon levels?" He follows up and just as you're about to answer, a soft knock on the ajar door had you looking back to see Hyunwoo's partner entering the house.

And just as you'd suspected, he was gorgeous too.

Not as tall as Hyunwoo but is similarly built. You could tell he was younger by the way his pants sagged a little and how his unbuttoned uniform shirt flowed as he moved. His tanned honey skin also shined from sweat and he removes his hat to reveal his short-cut black hair that spikes at the ends from moisture.

He's visibly affected by the heat and he exhales heavily as he set down the heavy bag he was toting. When he finds your eyes on him, he bows his head respectfully with a polite smile that shows the deepness of his dimples.

And then in a way similar to his counterparts, his eyes appraised you and your body with slight interest before he blinks himself back into reality.

"Afternoon." He greets you and the deep rasp of his voice does something to your insides that you wouldn't express to anyone aloud.

"Hi.." you rasp out, the dryness in your throat returning embarrassingly fast at the sight of him smiling.

Hyunwoo regards him for a moment then looks to you for the answer to his question.

"Miss? Your Attic?" He repeats and you nod faster than was what was necessary.

"Oh! Yeah. This way.."

You lead them to your garage, flicking on the light, and reached for the long beaded chain that pulled down the hatch on the ceiling.

You were short-ish, so you have to extend your torso a bit to reach it and your tank rides up to expose your waistline.

Sure, you could have allowed one of the obviously taller gentlemen accompanying you to do it. But this was your house and you were comfortable doing it on your own anyway.

The guys stand by as you grunted softly, using your strength to pull down the ladder and Jooheon can't help but observe your toned figure from where he stood.

Respectfully of course.

Hyunwoo pretends not to notice the way your spine curved slightly, accentuating your round and pert booty that sat up nicely from the way you stood on your tip toes.

But he definitely noticed, causing his Adam's apple to bob thickly in his throat.

He takes a step back once the ladder touches down on the garage floor.

"Awesome. Thank you. I can take it from here ma'am.." he dutifully reaches for the metal ladder and secures it into the proper position.

You step back as he makes sure the ladder is in place before ascending, leaving you with his partner.

He stands by patiently as Hyunwoo climbed the ladder, occasionally glancing over at you from the corner of his eye.

You weren't privy to his gaze since you were still watching Hyunwoo ascend, which gave Jooheon a few more seconds to admire the soft glisten of sweat that made your skin glow.

Sunkissed would be an understatement in describing the luster of your complexion and it takes some restraint to pull himself from your distracting presence.

He looks up to find Hyunwoo just about to step up onto the attic floor, knowing he'd have no good reason to have not been following him.

He reaches for the ladder and regards you with another polite and tight-lipped smile before ascending.

"We got it from here if you wanna head back inside." he pauses to say and you nodded gratefully. It was hotter in the damn garage than it was in the house.

"Great. Well if you guys need anything, I'll be in the living room." You say and Jooheon nods before continuing up with his bag on his shoulder.

Some minutes later.

You were back on your couch, trying to keep yourself occupied with your book.

The paragraph you had to start over three times began to look like foreign script as your mind drifted to the men working in your house.

Occasionally you'd hear them moving above your head in the attic or catch part of them conversing with each other in the garage.

You lift your head a little too eagerly when you hear heavy footsteps over your tiled floors, catching Hyunwoo or Jooheon's casual smile as they went outside for something.

Both of them had a gentle swagger about them that made their walks sexily distracting.

Jooheon's was a little staggered from the way his pants sat just below his waist. He stepped slowly, favoring his right side a little more and he switched in the most masculine way.

Then there was Hyunwoo.

Tall and confident, with the gate of a supermodel. His posture was much better than Jooheon's, making his broad shoulders more noticeable in the way the navy blue fabric hugged his lean form.

It was beginning to be kind of funny to you how aware you were of the men hired to fix your air conditioning, shaking the idea of them breaking the code of morale to indulge your interested glances.

Not to say you hadn't caught them looking back a few times but it could all be in your imagination.

You probably looked thirsty as hell in those little ass shorts.

Speaking of thirst...

Both men had been outside working on your unit for a while, leaving your house as hot and empty as it had been before.

You pushed yourself up from the couch and stepped heavily towards your kitchen, where you prepared a tall glass of ice water.

Mostly ice though.

Something was soothing about the biting coldness of it against your lips as you drank, along with its crunchiness when you allowed a few pieces to slip between your lips.

The elated groan of relief you released as it flowed down your throat was a bit on the erotic side. But you didn't care.

It was too hot to care.

But had you been more conscious of the open window on the other side of the kitchen, you might have done better in concealing it.

Meanwhile...

"Dammit. She's got an older model. I don't think I have the tools to access the grid in my bag." Hyunwoo huffs distractedly as he kneeled, rummaging through the assorted tools he'd brought with him. He wipes the sweat from his brow with a grimace, glancing up from his bag to find Jooheon pleasantly distracted by something.

He's leaned against the wall, mindlessly chewing on his lip with narrowed eyes that peer into the window that existed several feet away from where they were working.

Hyunwoo frowns at him and follows his gaze to find your shaded silhouette on the other side of the glass.

The distance and slight tint on the window make it difficult to decipher the specifics of what you were doing, but it became obvious when the outline of your body shifted to the side as you tipped back the glass of freshly poured ice water.

The line of your shadowed curves contrasted the white walls behind you, making it easy to admire the slimness of your waist and the perkiness of your ass in those shorts.

While Hyunwoo appeared nonplussed at your initial appearance at the front door, Jooheon recalls having to look away several times to avoid being caught staring.

Not that he was a pervert or anything.

You were just attractive and out of all of the job sites he'd done with Hyunwoo in this area, he never saw anyone as captivating as you.

You make a suggestive sound that's just barely audible outside via the crack of the opening at the bottom of the window, and both men were now watching like drones as you swallowed down the water.

Slow and indulgent.

It's almost seductive.

You exhale loudly as you lowered the glass from your lips.

"Um, you should be....working.."Hyunwoo's conflicted brow creased as you reached into the glass with dainty fingers, proceeding to pick a cube of ice from the many.

"I am..." Jooheon responds as you began to drag the ice over your skin, starting at your forehead, then trailing down under your jaw and neck.

From the literal outside looking in, one could assume that you had no idea you were being watched. But you weren't oblivious.

You were curious though.

Both men tilt their heads simultaneously as you tipped your head back to allow the cooling drizzles to run over your exposed skin, probably dripping between your breasts and dipping into your naval.

"Damn..." you could just about hear one of them say, both too distracted by the little show you put on to know whether it was out loud or not. And with a boldness neither of them could suspect, your eyes turn in the window's direction.

You were discrete though, the shade of the room making it impossible for them to know you could see them watching. But it doesn't stop you from smirking.

The one named Jooheon was staring the hardest, his bottom lip hanging and his eyes reduced to slits in the sun.

The other, Hyunwoo, watched with an air of curiosity in his brow. As if he wanted to look away but couldn't.

For some reason that was just as attractive as the other blatantly watching you tease yourself with the ice cube.

Well, at least you weren't the only hot and bothered by their presence.

After toying with their attention for a few more seconds, you toss the half-melted cube in the sink and turn away to exit the kitchen as if you knew nothing, switching cutely in your shorts as you retreated from the view of the two on-looking repairmen.

Hyunwoo was first to look away, realizing how unprofessional all of this was with flustered cheeks. He shakes his head shamefully.

"Ok...shows over" he mutters, resuming his search through his bag.

Jooheon smacked his lips slowly, not sure if he was more enamored by the thought of the ice melting against your skin or how thirsty he was now from watching you.

He pushes himself from the outside wall he leaned against.

"Ok. Ima say it. She's fine..." he blurts out and Hyunwoo snorts.

"She's a client," he responds, rising to stand with a frustrated scowl on his face.

"You got a multimeter in your bag?" he asks and Jooheon shakes his head, consequently shaking the sweat from his bangs.

"Naw. I saw one in the van though. I wonder if she's single....this house is pretty spacious for just one person..." Jooheon resumes his gaze toward the window and Hyunwoo rolls his eyes in amusement before snapping his fingers to gain Jooheon's attention.

"Hey...look at me. Don't even think about it," he says just above a whisper, and the corners of Jooheon's mouth droop into an offended frown.

"What?"

"You know what...I don't need any complaints on my ledger today because you wanna flirt with the homeowner. Just act like a professional and help me get the job done." he commands softly, sounding more like an older brother or friend than a coworker. Jooheon smirks at his choice of words, turning his head back towards the window briefly.

"Man......I am a professional. In ALL aspects.." he mutters, tearing his gaze from the window to regard Hyunwoo.

"Alright well, professionally walk your ass to the van and see if you can find the shit we need to crack this unit open. Wipe that drool off your lip too." Hyunwoo playfully tosses him the navy blue bandana he kept in his waistband to wipe sweat from his hands straight at Jooheon's face suddenly.

He catches it before it makes contact, albeit begrudgingly as he threw it back for Hyunwoo to catch against his chest with a chuckle.

Not much happened after you returned to the living room. Both men remained outside and you could hear the sound of their tools buzzing and clanging against metal as they worked. You envisioned them working up quite the sweat out there, their shirts most likely sticking to their skin.

Perhaps you should go out there and check on them.

To offer them something to drink of course.

Not to lust after them like a little creep.

You blush at the thought, finding it harder to focus on your reading now that all you could imagine was thick necks with sweat dripping leisurly down..

Just nasty things, ok?

Anywho...

After a while, your set your book down to rub at your tired eyes and wipe the sweat collecting over your brow.

Between the heat and so distracted by the hired specialists slaving away sexily to keep you from dying of heat stroke, you found yourself sagging into the welcoming cushions of your couch.

You lean your head back and prop your bare feet on the edge of your glass table, mindful of your half-full glass of ice on the coaster.

It wasn't your intention to fall asleep.

You merely wanted a moment to rest your eyes and keep an ear out in case one of the repairmen summoned your attention.

But the fatigue from sweating all day was inevitable.

So with drooping eyelids and slower breaths...

You drifted.

Slowly.

Peacefully.

Deeply...

"It's still pretty hot down here."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I say well over 100 degrees."

"Damn, that is hot."

"Yeah, I don't think feeling around with my fingers is helping.."

"Why not use your mouth instead then?"

"You think that'll work?"

"Worth a try..."

Their voices feel distant at first.

Barely comprehensible and faint.

But their touch is overwhelmingly evident as you slowly awakened.

Warm.

Soft.

Wet.

Cold.

Ice cold...

You moaned unintentionally when the bite of a melting ice cube kissed the peak of your exposed nipple, your breath shuddering as your eyes opened.

Deft fingers stroked your walls slowly, rubbing occasionally at your most sensitive spot as you came to. You lift your head and blink heavily as the room spun from your fading slumber, only to find yourself naked and spread eagle with a man kneeling between your legs.

His dark hair sticks to his forehead.

His plump bottom lip catches between his teeth, making his dimples crease the center of his cheeks as he watched the way your juices coated his fingers.

"Oh...oh...shit..." you exhale shakily with a moan that's like music to your blurry lover's ears. He smiles around his bitten lip and chuckles softly as he lowered his head.

Hyunwoo looks up just as you stirred fully awake and moaned again, smirking at the soft confusion on your face that morphed into a pleasured expression the moment his partner put his mouth on your heat.

"Look who decided to join us..." he says casually from beside you on the couch, leaning comfortably against the cushions.

Your eyes take their time adjusting as you become fully conscious and the first thing they're able to focus on vividly is the melting ice cube being slowly rubbed over your left nipple.

Your body heat melts it on contact, causing little streams of water to flow over the curve of your breast. You tremble at the tickle it sends over your skin and Hyunwoo's smirk widens.

From the waist down he's still in his uniform of work pants and boots.

But by the looks of his bare shoulders and exposed neckline, it's apparent that he's shed his work shirt in favor of his sleeveless undershirt. Its damp around the collar from sweat, confirmed by the way his skin had even more of a natural glisten over its smooth surface.

You studied him distractedly as the other male sucked softly on your outer lips teasingly, his fingers still at work.

Your bare chest heaved as you attempted to move but your limbs felt like jello.

Trembling and weak from exhaustion.

"What...what is happ..." you trail off as the warmth of the man you now recognized as the one named Jooheon sucked on your clit hard.

"Relax...we're here to help..." Hyunwoo's deeply soothing tone appeases you.

Your bare chest pushed against the thinning cube of ice as you gasped, and Hyunwoo pulls it away from your breast to lean over your glistening chest.

He sucks the excess water from your nipple casually before responding.

"You were overheated," Hyunwoo remarks cooly as he swallowed, lapping at your nipple with a similar fervor to Jooheon as his tongue glides over the front of your pussy.

"Yeah. While we were working on the unit outside, the house must have gotten so hot that you passed out." he tacks on as if he wasn't two knuckles deep inside of you right now.

Your brow crinkles at their responses, neither of them explaining why you were naked and at the mercy of their hands and tongues.

Rationally, you would be mortified and resist their touches at all cost.

But damn.....

They felt so good, it was almost as if you were in a daze.

"I...passed out?" you mumbled and both men nod.

"We tried fanning you. Flicking your face with water..." Hyunwoo begins.

"Calling your name.." Jooheon adds.

"Tapping your face.." Hyunwoo says.

"Shaking your shoulders.." Jooheon concedes.

"But nothing worked until we heard you say our names in your sleep..Telling us...begging us to touch you. To cool you down..." Hyunwoo explains, his eyes on his work as he kissed your nipple with ice.

"We had to think fast. You were sweating so much. And when we felt your skin...It felt like you were on fire so..." he pauses again as he discards the tiny shard of ice in his mouth before reaching for a new cube from your forgotten glass.

He places it between his teeth and leans down to graze a flat side over your shoulder and collarbone.

You shivered on contact, gasping sharply when his tongue pushes the cube out further and slip from his mouth.

None of it made sense.

You knew it didn't.

But nothing about how these men were pleasuring you in an attempt to help you, only made you care less about the logic and more about the intention.

"Wow....is this a s...service you both typically provide?" you stutter as the new ice cube glides over your skin, this time between your breasts and down the line of your abdomen. Water drips into your naval, just above where Hyunwoo places his hand, and an unintentional moan of need vibrates in your chest.

He shakes his head as he drags the ice cube back up your body.

"Not typically," he smirks, and that's all he says before leaning back in to lick up the rouge streams of water dripping down the side of your waist.

Your jaw drops when he licks over your skin and you twitch when his cold lips skim over a ticklish spot, making both men smirk.

"But we figured you required some.....drastic assistance" Jooheon pauses his ministrations to say. He immediately goes back to filling his mouth with your pussy, humming appreciatively at your taste.

Hyunwoo straightens up to resume playing with your nipple with the ice, but his soft gaze was now on your face.

He gauges the confusion and pleasure written all over it, and he tilts his head curiously.

"Would you like us to stop? We can...now that you're awa..." he says but is interrupted by the floor-to-ceiling moan you let out in response to Jooheon suddenly replacing his fingers with a vibrating bullet that felt all too familiar.

Jooheon clicks the button a few times before settling on a pulsing setting, pressing it deep inside of you before resuming his skilled tongue over your clit.

"Found that on your nightstand...hope you don't mind..." you heard Hyunwoo say but you were too blissed out to give a damn.

You shook your head emphatically with your lips parted.

"Oh fuck...Dont stop. Don't stop, please..." you pant as Jooheon flicks the tip of his tongue over you quickly, all while Hyunwoo goes back to sucking and toying with your nipples.

His tongue continues to mimic Jooheon's and his hooded gaze remains on your expression as they both drowned you with stimulation and pleasure.

When your eyes begin to roll back, Hyunwoo hums in approval.

"She's cumming.." Hyunwoo murmurs around your flesh.

Jooheon is far too engulfed by his task to care about anything else and he perks his brow with a questioning hum against your pussy.

Hyunwoo pulls away to watch the way Jooheon licked over your folds relentlessly, getting caught up in how arousing it was to witness before blinking.

"She's cumming....so don't you fucking stop.." he nearly growls to Jooheon, who didn't need his advice considering he could literally taste your orgasm approaching.

But he nods stiffly in compliance as he pressed his mouth deeper against you.

You could feel your vibrator getting pushed toward your entrance from how you were squeezing it, meaning you were getting closer.

Your moans were uncontrollable by now, your breath quickening and your legs trembling.

Jooheon closed his lips around your clit as he flicked it harder and faster, holding your legs down to keep them open.

Hyunwoo licked over your nipple sloppily while his other hand pinched the other, having forgotten about the melted cup of ice on the table.

Both of them moan along with you as if the sights and sounds of your climax were enough to make them cum undone untouched.

But the only one who is left panting and shaking is you.

Jooheon glances up to find you writhing against his tongue and he smiles with satisfaction. You felt his lips spread into an open-mouthed grin as he dragged his tongue over your heat lazily, soaking up every drop of cum that spurted from your opening.

He removes the vibrator and clicks its power button a few times until it goes silent.

It's as if you could still feel it inside of though, its residual tremors fading slowly.

Your receding climax blazed trails of goosebumps all over your body, making your legs tremble as they hung over Jooheon's shoulders. He continued to lick you slowly and it takes you whimpering for mercy to get him to pull his mouth away.

Jooheon tosses the cum-coated toy aside on the couch before returning to kiss you gently at your center, trailing his lips up your inner thighs.

Distracting you from his lips, you felt another pair pressing gently against your temple. Then to your cheek and ending on your lips. Your eyes open slowly to find Hyunwoo beside you, cupping your breast that was still wet with his spit and melted ice massaging it as he kissed you.

You were vaguely aware of Jooheon moving from between your legs to take up the space on your other side.

Once settled, the warmth that was just surrounding your clit was now circling your other nipple. Hyunwoo gives the nipple on his side a squeeze and you moan pitifully against his lips, feeling him smile.

"Do you still feel hot?" Hyunwoo inquires and you shake your head, causing the tips of your noses to brush together.

"Good. Now...how would you rate our service for you today? Hmm? Were we good?" he whispers to you, teasing your lips while Jooheon flicked his tongue over your sensitive skin. Before you could answer him, Hyunwoo moves to replace his hand with his mouth and he joins Jooheon to worship your pert nipples with their tongues.

Having both of their mouths on you in that way, coupled with their big hands skimming down your body, it felt as if you were already on the brink of coming undone again.

They were both so different and yet the same.

Strong and confident.

Experienced and determined.

Hot and cold.

It was overwhelming.

It was...

"Hello?"

"Miss?"

You awake suddenly.

Panting and covered in a cool layer of moisture.

You find yourself laid out on the couch as you had been before in your living room, frowning in confusion at not even realizing that you'd fallen asleep.

As you slowly sit up, you become aware of the humming sound overhead of your air conditioning now kicked on and cooling your house.

And you were also aware of the eyes on you.

His blurry name tag comes into view as he crouched down in front of the couch. His sharp brow furrowed and pouted lips formed a grim line of concern.

"Miss?"

Hyunwoo's voice chimes quizzically in your mind and you blinked rapidly like an idiot as the erotic images from deep in your mind fade, only to be replaced by one of the beautiful faces from your fantasy regarding you worriedly.

Your parted lips come together and you gain some focus on the features of the repair man, his dark eyes and prominent scowl as he gauged your odd behavior.

"Um...are you ok?" he asks, rising to stand as you sat up.

You glance around confusedly before almost frantically touching your chest and thighs, making sure you weren't naked this time.

"Whew" you thought.

"Yeah...Yeah. I'm ok...I think the heat knocked me out." you joke weakly.

Hyunwoo smirks at your response and you try your best not to think too far into his smugness.

He moves back so that you have enough space to stand, untucking a clipboard from under his arm.

"Yeah..it can most definitely do that to you. I've come close to passing out while working outside a few times. Hydrating is important." he mutters casually and you nod, your mind thinking back to him pretty much drinking ice water from your naval 2 minutes ago in your dreams.

"I can imagine.." you chuckle, now feeling a little exposed in your thin tank and little shorts.

Hyunwoo says nothing as he flipped through a few pages on his clipboard with a focused frown on his face, giving you a moment to assess what the hell had just happened.

A wet dream? How old were you?

A literal wet dream. You could feel your walls trembling as if you'd just cum in real life, the slippery mess making the crotch of your panties stick to you.

That damn heat really did do a number on you, boiling your brain until it cooked up a freaky ass fantasy involving these two fine ass strangers.

You'd have to take a long shower after these men left.

A cold one for more reasons than one.

"Ok so...We're just about done here. Everything is good to go...Attic checked out. Thermostat is reset. I just need your signature here." Hyunwoo was all business as he addressed you now, going down a mental checklist as he offered the clipboard to you.

"Ok." You mumble as you took it from him with the pen tucked beneath the clip. You glance up at him shyly as you scribbled your signature at the bottom of the invoice, feeling Hyunwoo's gaze on you with that unreadable expression of his.

"Thank you... " he says when you handed it back to him.

Just then, his partner strolls by from the garage covered in sweat. His work shirt is off and hanging over his shoulder, his sweated-through white tee clinging to his body.

He removes his hat to wipe the wetness from his brow before replacing it, and your eyes linger on the way his chest flexed underneath his t-shirt when he lifted the heavy tool bag from the floor where it sat keeping the front door open.

It's as if he can feel you watching him and you're met with a casual dimpled smile that gives you another savory flashback.

"You have a really old unit. Im not sure how old the house itself is but Im still surprised they installed it. So from what we were able to do today, it should hold for a little bit. But Id consider getting it replaced if you don't want it giving out on you again. It should be covered under your home warranty. " Hyunwoo distracts you from your fleeting thoughts and you nod at him in understanding.

"Ok. Good to know. Thank you."

"No problem. You have any questions for me before we go?" he asks, lifting his brow.

From the corner of your eye, you detected Jooheon lingering in your doorway with the strap of his work bag over his shoulder.

His head is down as his thumbs tapped against his phone but at Hyunwoo's question, he lifts his gaze curiously.

Oh, the number of inappropriate questions that filled your brain at that moment.

Starting with what a girl had to do to make what transpired in her brain a reality.

You weren't at all the shy type but neither were you bold enough to ask two strangers if they'd be willing to ruin you on a hot Thursday afternoon.

Or night.

You wondered vaguely if they were single. You didn't spot a ring on either of their finger but you never assumed. The way they looked at you made it easy to believe that if they weren't single, they probably weren't 100% faithful.

At least you hoped.

Terrible, yes.

You quickly reel in the whore inside of them as she fought for dominance, despite not disagreeing with what she wanted.

You had to make sure they'd even be down to do something like that. It would be expected that they had their jobs to consider and it would be arrogant to assume you shared the same type of attraction.

Or relationship status.

So you had to play it cool.

"Yeah actually..." you pipe up and Hyunwoo regards you with the same, but of interest, he had been the entire interaction.

"Sure.." he mutters, tilting his head expectedly. You hesitate when you spot his gaze falling on your lips for a few seconds then back up to your eyes.

Checkmate.

"Say I have any issues with it again.....Who would I contact? You guys or..."

From the way your eyes danced between the two of them, there must have been a naughty undertone to the way you trailed off, and both Jooheon and Hyunwoo exchanged a look.

"Well...typically, you would contact the manufacturer and per your warranty, they'd send someone out to see what was going on. With a service fee and whatnot...It could be anyone." Hyunwoo shrugs, noting the slight disappointment in your pout

"Oh...ok."

"But....and this is off the record. We don't mind dropping by if it's a simple matter. Something quick and easy to fix...to save you some money." Jooheon cuts in, shifting his eyes toward Hyunwoo. He rolls his eyes in amusement but doesn't look as if he's about to disagree.

"Really?" you ask, mirroring the little smirk now on Hyunwoo's gorgeous face.

"Yeah we do a lot of work in this area so, it wouldn't be major for us to just drop by. Here..." he flips the pages of the clipboard and clicks the pen before scrawling something down. He rips the bottom portion of the paper and offers it to you.

"That's my personal number. I'm usually free to respond anytime....in case you need us for anything," he says casually as if he truly intended this exchange to be strictly professional. You take it slowly, looking over his handwriting and nodding.

"And he does mean....anything," Jooheon adds, avoiding a scolding look from Hyunwoo for sounding overly suggestive.

As if you'd mind or be offended.

This was music to your ears.

You giggle at Jooheon's darkened gaze as it juxtaposed his bright smile and you nod again in complete understanding of his gist.

"Cool. Thank you." you direct towards him with a softly bitten lip. Hyunwoo watches the brief flirty exchange with that same smirk, shaking his head and turning to head in Jooheon's direction.

"Alright well..we'll get going. Enjoy the rest of your day miss..." he says, tipping his chin towards his partner in a dismissive gesture and Jooheon reluctantly prepares to leave.

"Don't be afraid to use that number!" he calls over his should just as Hyunwoo pushes him ahead, turning to give you a semi-apologetic smile before reaching for the door handle.

"Ok. Thank you again.  You two stay cool out here.." you call after them and both men turn to give you one last polite smile, their gazes lingering on you for a second longer than necessary.

It would have been delusional of you to think it was because they found you attractive but something seems confirmed when Hyunwoo glanced back at you a second time before pulling your door closed.

And the moment they're gone, you nearly fling yourself on your sofa and bury your face in the cushions.

My nickname for this duo is Super Smash Bros and I dont think it needs an explanation 🌚🥴

[uriwoos2]

𝗫𝗜𝗞𝗘𝗥𝗦 masterlist_

[guide] genre: fluff – f , hurt/comfort – h/c , crack – c type: blurbs – ★ , headcanons – ♡ , drabbles – ➶ , longer fics – ☾

༉ minjae

...nothing yet ˚· ʚïɞ

༉ junmin

shy boyfie jumie [ f , ★ ]

༉ sumin

...nothing yet ˚· ʚïɞ

༉ jinsik

...nothing yet ˚· ʚïɞ

༉ hyunwoo

...nothing yet ˚· ʚïɞ

༉ junghoon

fallin' in love overnight [ c , f , ☾ ]

༉ seeun

...nothing yet ˚· ʚïɞ

༉ yujun

admiring from afar [ f , ➶ ]

༉ hunter

not why i love you [ f , ☾ ]

༉ yechan

...nothing yet ˚· ʚïɞ

༉ ot10

boys with a crush! pt.1 [ f , ♡ ]

boys with a crush! pt.2 [ f , ♡ ]

. ⊹ ₊ ⋆ . ˚ ୨୧⋆ . ˚ ₊ ⊹ . ༘ ˚ʚ ∿⌓ᗢ ₊ ˚⑅ ﾟ . ⊹ ₊ ˚ . ⋆୨୧ ˚ . ⋆ ₊ ⊹ .

[blackcardz]

 hyunwoo's  breath  caught  in  his  throat  at  the  sensation  of  eunbi's  lips  brushing  against  his  cheek.  the  warmth  radiating  from  her  touch  sent  a  jolt  of  electricity  through  him,  intensifying  the  moment.  he  turned  his  head  slightly,  catching  her  gaze  with  a  mix  of  mischief  and  sincerity.  ❛  toying  with  you  ?  maybe  just  a  little.  ❜  he  replied,  his  voice  low  and  playful,  laced  with  a  teasing  tone  that  matched  her  own.  ❛  but  can  you  blame  me  ?  you  make  it  far  too  easy.  ❜  he  took  a  step  back,  just  enough  to  see  her  fully,  and  the  corner  of  his  mouth  curled  into  a  smirk.  ❛  you  are  the  one  who  keeps  getting  closer,  after  all.  i  can't  help  but  wonder  if  you  secretly  enjoy  this  as  much  as  i  do.  ❜  with  a  playful  wink,  he  leaned  in  slightly,  their  faces  just  inches  apart,  allowing  the  tension  to  simmer  between  them.  ❛  but  i  promise,  i'm  not  just  playing  games  here.  i  might  just  want  to  see  where  this  goes.  ❜  he  paused,  the  teasing  glint  in  his  eyes  softening  into  something  more  genuine.  ❛  what  do  you  think,  noona  ?  should  we  keep  playing  ?  ❜

       male  definitely  knew  what  he  was  doing  in  this  very  moment,  everything  from  the  brush  of  warm  lips  to  hear  ear,  followed  with  that  low  obstacle  of  his  voice  ringing  for  a  shiver  to  run  her  spine;  eventually  causing  fingers  around  locks  to  tighten,  all  on  instinct  due  to  the  sensations  hyunwoo  was  currently  creating  within  eunbi.   ❛  so  sweet  and  yet  ...  ❜   trailing  off,  eunbi  tip-toed  up  to  meet  hyunwoo's  height,  mirroring  her  prior  doings  with  leveling  red  colored  lips  near  his  ear,  whispering  in  a  soft  tone.   ❛  why  does  it  feel  like  you're  toying  with  me,  kind  sir  ?  ❜   last  word  having  a  emphasis  to  it,  while  head  turned  and  mouth  pressed  a  soft,  almost  ghost-like  kiss  to  the  apple  of  hyunwoo's  cheek.

[writersrealmbts]

Clearwater Springs: Part 13

Description: ot7 x reader, reader’s choice, fairy/supernatural/soulmate au. The choices you make influence the story! In this world, war-torn and ragged, you’ve been offered a home and a job working as a librarian. Will you meet your soulmates? Will you ever find the shelves behind the piles of books? Who knows.

Warnings: idk

Posted: 04/26/2023

Tags: ot7 x reader, supernatural bts, soulmate au

2,029 words

A/N: Back to surveys, whoo

You weren't sure if it was Hoseok seeing the future or just a matter of taking care of things since they were taking care of everything else, but the front flowerbeds had been cleared and fresh dirt turned up, ready for new plants. You were assuming it was Hoseok since another flowerbed toward the back had been established with a ring of stream-smoothed stones as the outline and the sod cut away. Right where you were thinking of putting the garden you were originally planning on.

The boys themselves appeared to be on a break, sipping water or lemonade or whatever and sitting on the grass, as the three of you arrived home.

Jungkook hopped up. "You're back!"

"We are, sit back down," you admonished, laughing at his antics. "Look, we got the prettiest little tree! I saw it and I had to have it."

Continue reading on Ao3...

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