#c: nima

[jbaileyfansite]

Jonathan Bailey with Nima Nakhshab at the Universal Studios in Los Angeles for the Wicked's press tour [x]

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

Take Care of You [9]

Sugar Daddy!Joel Miller x Female!Reader

Overall Warnings: slow burn, angst/comfort, power imbalance, age gap, possessive tendencies, eventual smut, #daddyissues, independent reader learns to let go and relax, emotionally constipated Joel Miller learns to be vulnerable; (more specific warnings to be added to individual chapters if necessary)

Chapter Word Count: 9,950

Mood board and borders by @saradika

Summary: You spent your entire adult life supporting yourself and barely getting by. It’s why a life of ease offered to you by a mysterious stranger sounded so foreign and unbelievable. Joel Miller, dressed in flannels that had seen better days, didn’t look like the kind who could promise you the world on a plate, but he seemed desperate to help out. All he asks is that you let him take care of you. That wouldn’t be so hard. Would it?

[a/n: we back, baby. and we also barely edited so if you catch a typo don't hate me. also this was supposed to end in a different spot but then i got carried away in the middle so i had to split it 🥴]

Chapter Specific Warnings: angst, heartbreak, binge drinking to ease emotional turmoil, mild violence, mentions of blood and injury

09: LET ME TAKE CARE OF YOU

"i still haven't figured out how to sit across from you, and not be madly in love with everything you do." ⏤ william c. hannon

Three years ago, Nima tried to convince you to go skydiving with her. She begged and she pleaded, but you told her ‘no’ on account of thinking she was a crazy person for wanting to jump out of a perfectly good plane. Which was hilarious now considering you were sitting beside Joel wanting to pull open the door and dive out. The irony was not lost on you.

The only reason you hadn’t gone scrambling for the door was because Joel was forced to take a work call a few minutes into the flight. He hadn’t moved away. Joel stayed right next to you with his arm behind you as he spoke, and every few moments he’d glance at you with a silent apology and shake his head. You’d reply with a tight lipped smile and go back to mindlessly scrolling through instagram. 

Unfortunately the mindlessly scrolling was not so mindless. Since leaving Vegas, you had a high pitch ringing in the back of your mind like an endless, echoing siren. Married. A married man. Joel was⏤ Your teeth were clenched together so hard you wondered if Joel could hear them grinding against one another. Yesterday had been filled with so much anxiety, and you had managed to work through it by the end of the night. Mostly. But this was worse. This was so much worse. 

Married?

Your throat suddenly felt tight, eyes stinging with unshed tears, and you hastily undid your seatbelt and stood. Joel glanced your way and you pointed to the back of the plane and mouthed the word ‘bathroom’ to him. He nodded with a soft smile, and you spun on your heel and practically sprinted to the tiny plane bathroom. You struggled to get the folding door shut and the stewardess who sat not far away stared at you in confusion. You gave her an awkward wave and finally got it latched. 

“Fuck.” You shoved your face in your hands, leaning against the wall, and held back your tears. You were confused and frustrated, and you couldn’t even find relief in a good cry because Joel would spot it in a heartbeat no matter how much you tried to put yourself back together. The thought of confronting him about this right now was your worst nightmare. You hadn’t had the time to process any of the wild thoughts pinging around your head yet.

Your mind was at war with itself. On one hand, maybe you were being stupid and naive. For the last month and a half you’ve spent nearly every day with Joel and on the days you weren’t actively seeing him the two of you would talk either over a call or through text. You knew Yo-yo for 24 hours. Sure, she seemed nice and sincere, but what if Rosalind sent her to screw with you? For all you knew, Yo-yo had cruel intentions and was trying to drive a wedge between you and Joel. By taking her word you’d be playing right into that trap. What she said about the other sugar baby and about Joel being married? Maybe it was all fake and you’ve been stressing for no reason.

On the other hand, Joel didn’t kiss you. He didn’t kiss you because he wanted to ‘do right by you’. Joel asked for time. Was it because he needed to get a divorce? Worse. Was he married with absolutely no plans to get divorced and just buying time for something else? 

God, if you kept up this line of thought you were gonna vomit. Quickly, you turned to the sink to splash a little cold water on your face in hopes it would help you get your shit together for the next thirty minutes. Half an hour and you’d be on the ground. But then what? It would be a miracle if you kept it together for thirty minutes let alone any longer. 

You took in a long, slow breath and tried to clear your mind. When you felt steady enough, you stepped out of the bathroom. As tempting as it was to hide in there for the rest of the flight, it would probably be a red flag for Joel that something was wrong. You wandered back over to Joel and at your approach, and at the sight of you, he covered the bottom of his phone and whispered, “You alright?”

“Mhmm.” You nodded quickly and sat back down.

“I’m sorry. Jus’ another minute.” 

You waved your hands at him as nonchalantly as you could and he went back to his call. You leaned back in the seat, phone in hand, and Joel readjusted his arm on the back of the seat so he could settle his hand on your shoulder. As he always did, his thumb was tracing circles on your shoulder. An action you always loved, but now an intrusive thought slammed into you⏤ does he do this with his wife? The question was so startling, so sickening, that you couldn’t bite back the nausea that rolled through your body. You jumped up so fast you nearly stumbled over your feet, and you scrambled for the bathroom. 

Vaguely, you heard your name behind you, but you didn’t stop until you reached the toilet. You fell to your knees and threw up. The taste of acid in your mouth made you wince, but getting it all up did bring some relief. That relief was short lived though as you felt a large, warm hand settle on your back.

“Jesus, sugar.” He said in a soothing voice as he rubbed your back. “What’s goin’ on? Have you felt sick all mornin’?”

You spat into the toilet bowl, trying to get the taste of bile out of your mouth, before reaching out and flushing the toilet. You tried to stand, and Joel hooked his arm around you to help you up. He called out of the bathroom and a second later the stewardess brought in a cup of water and a ginger ale. Joel handed you the water and kept his hand rubbing up and down on your back.

“I’m⏤ I’m fine.” You shook your head and took a sip of water to swish and spit into the sink. “Really.”

“Obviously not.” Joel replied. “C’mon, let’s sit you down.”

“Joel…” You tried to argue, but he wasn’t hearing it. He kept an arm around you as he carefully led you back to the seat. He brought the bottle of ginger ale with you and the moment you finished the water he took the cup out of your hand to replace it with the soda. “I feel better now. It’s fine.”

“You’ve been off this mornin'. I was worried.” Joel lifted a hand to feel your forehead. It made sense that Joel picked up on your distress. He had always been so good at reading you. “You seemed fine when we first woke up. When exactly did you start feelin' sick?”

You took a sip of the ginger ale, “I…I don’t know. After breakfast maybe.” You lied. The sincerity in his eyes, the concern in his voice, it was both bringing you comfort and making you sick again all at once. You felt so stupid. Either you were freaking out over a lie a woman you barely knew told you or you were being tricked into feelings by a married man. Either way, you felt pathetic. “Your, um, your work call, Joel.”

Joel shook his head in response and didn’t even bother addressing the work call he stopped. He set a hand on the back of your neck and his thumb was lightly ghosting over your skin. You closed your eyes and took a slow breath in and out through your nose. “Tell me what I can do, sugar.”

“I⏤” You swallowed the lump in your throat. You forced your eyes open, finding Joel’s furrowed brow and worried gaze already on you, and it made you want to cry. You shook your head, “I, um, I think I just wanna lay down for a while. If that’s okay.”

“Course it’s okay.” He replied. 

The seat the two of you were sharing wasn’t long enough for you to lay down without laying your head on Joel’s lap. You planned on moving to the other couch seats to lay down, but Joel’s hand was still on the back of your neck and he lightly began to guide you down. Too tired to even try and move, you settled your head on his thigh and curled your body up onto the rest of the seat. 

In any other situation, this would be one of the most comfortable spots on Earth. Your head rested on his thick, firm thigh, and Joel’s hand traced where he could reach. Up and down your jawline and neck⏤ his thumb and forefinger would occasionally massage your earlobe. You tried to calm your racing thoughts. The truth was, you didn’t know the truth yet. It was a fact you kept repeating in your head in hopes it would numb the sharp pain of your worst fears, but those intrusive thoughts continued to pummel you.

“I’m so sorry, baby girl.” Joel murmured while his fingers dragged across your skin. “What a shitty way to end this weekend.” You hummed in agreement. This really was a shitty way to close out what started as one of the best weekends of your life.

Avoiding Joel made you realize how involved in your life he was. After landing in LA, Joel tried to drag you to a doctor and only conceded when you told him it was probably a 24 hour bug and you just wanted to sleep. He called you later that night to check in on you, and you managed to talk to him for a few minutes before lying about wanting to go to bed early. Come Monday morning, you went to work despite Joel texting you that you should stay home. Trying to focus at work was physically painful. Enough so that after the nightmare Monday had been, you left midway through the day today claiming to Henry that you didn’t feel well. It wasn’t even a full blown lie. You felt like shit.

Nima threw the folder of papers onto her desk and set her hands on her hips, “I’m gonna hit him with my car.”

“Please don’t.” You mumbled with your chin resting in your palm as you leaned on the other side of her desk. After leaving work, you came directly to Nima’s office. Going home and sitting on your couch, alone with your thoughts, would only make you ten times more miserable.

“No, actually, my car isn’t big enough. I’m gonna commandeer a bus and hit him with that.”

“I haven’t confirmed anything yet. For all I know, I’m being this pathetic over nothing.”

Nima snapped her hand up and pointed at you with a glare, “No. I will not have you shit talking yourself when the only person we should be shit talking is Joel Miller and his wife.”

You groaned and let your head fall to the desk. The words ‘Joel Miller and his wife’ made you viscerally ill. The time you spent not talking to Joel Monday night you spent stalking people on social media. You reached dead ends very quickly though since Joel didn’t have any social media whatsoever. The easiest solution was to just look Joel in the eyes and ask him for the truth, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You wanted to know the truth, but you were scared to actually seek it out. 

If you asked Joel for the truth, if you confronted him, then he’d give it to you.

What if the truth was something you didn’t want to hear?

“Alrighty, babe, real talk.” Nima said and you lifted your head, keeping your chin resting on the wood, and saw she had dropped down into her office chair. To meet your eye line, she held her chin on the desk across from you to mirror your position. “I can threaten and plot his demise all I want, but I know I’m not allowed to kill him until this is confirmed or denied.” She twisted her lips. “You deserve the truth.”

You pouted, “How am I supposed to ask him about this, Nima??”

Her eyebrows furrowed in concern, “If you did ask… How sure are you that he’d answer truthfully?”

You pushed up and leaned back in the chair. That was a good question, and with anyone else it would probably be a real concern. However, you weren’t worried about that. You truly, deep down, believed that if you confronted Joel about this he would give you the truth. 

“I really think he would.” You answered. “Is that naive of me?”

“You know him better than I do.”

This entire situation made you question that. Did you know him? You knew he grew up in Austin. He had a younger brother, Tommy, and it was just them and his mom for most of his childhood. You knew he attended one year in college when his mom passed away⏤ cancer. Joel dropped out of college to take care of his brother and picked up a job in construction. That’s where he got his start. His first boss saw he had a knack for more than just the manual labor and trusted him with more and more until Joel was running sites for the man. At 27, Joel’s girlfriend of three months got pregnant. They planned to make it work, but she left when Sarah was two weeks old. You knew he adopted Ellie three years later. That he earned his bachelor’s degree in business at home through online classes while raising two young girls and working a full time job. That he started Miller Construction shortly after earning that degree, and it blew up from there.

You knew despite being a tough guy, he didn’t like horror movies.

You knew his favorite whiskey was Lagavulin⏤ neat.

The one thing you didn’t know was if he was married or not.

“I am going to suggest something,” Nima began, “And I want you to listen before you call me crazy.” You shot her confused look and she continued on. “I have this cousin.” You groaned and Nima chastised you to listen. It seemed like she had a cousin available for every situation that arose, and half the people she called cousin weren’t even technically related to her by blood. Anytime you asked her about it all she’d say was ‘Korean moms’ love to talk’, as if that clarified anything for you. “Seriously. He’s dating a private eye. With one text, we can get some answers.”

You shook your head, “Nima, that’s insane.”

“Is it?”

“Yes, hiring a private investigator is insane.” 

“Look, it’ll get us reliable answers.” Nima argued. “The truth.”

You rolled the idea around in your head. It was literally the epitome of paranoid absurdity, but you were wondering if that’s the point you were at. Would it be better to find out this way? That way when you finally did confront Joel you wouldn’t be blind sided by the answer. Hell, if the answer turned out to be ‘no, he isn’t married’ then you can chalk up the last few days as time wasted and move on with your life. That being said, it did seem like an invasion of Joel’s privacy. 

“That feels…” You paused, “Illegal?”

“It’s not illegal to hire a PI.” Nima countered then tilted her head. “I think. I’m not a lawyer, but people do it on TV all the time, right?”

“Well, that logic is foolproof.” 

“I’m not gonna do it if you tell me you don’t want to do it.” Nima said firmly. She crossed her arms and gave a small little shrug. “But you have to do something. Either this or just call him right now and tell him the two of you need to talk.” There was a protective sincerity in her eyes that felt like a security blanket being settled on your shoulders. “I don’t want to see you get more attached to this guy just to be hurt. I don’t want him to lie to you.”

You knew Nima only had your best interests in mind. Technically, Joel had given you no reason not to trust him. Half the time you thought on this topic you convinced yourself you were overreacting and being a pathetic, paranoid mess. Yo-yo, as nice and fun as she had been, was a virtual stranger to you. Her word shouldn’t trump Joel’s. You knew all of that, and you wanted to trust him. However, it felt like some broken part of you was looking for something to be wrong. Joel Miller was too good to be true. Why would someone like him be interested in someone like you? There had to be something else going on. According to your ex, you hadn’t even been worthy of him and Joel Miller was ten times the man he was. 

“Okay, do it.” You blurted and hated yourself for doing so.

Nima held your gaze for a second, but you pushed to stand and crossed her office to her private bathroom. You took one of the paper towels, dampening it, and set it on the back of your neck in a poor attempt to ground yourself. For a while longer, you just stood there in front of the sink. Not staring at yourself, but staring forward at a singular spot as your thoughts raced. You needed a positive thought. Just one would do, and you were prepared to drag it out of your thick skull kicking and screaming if necessary. 

“Everything is going to be okay.” You mumbled to yourself softly. 

The whispered words did nothing for your anxiety. However, the memory of him did. You found comfort looking back at the soft moments spent with Joel and let yourself fall down that rabbit hole. The temporary peace was nice, but it didn't last. Finding strength you didn’t know you had today, you splashed your face one more time and then left the bathroom.

Your eyes immediately landed on Nima who stared back with wide eyes. Nima spoke first, “What?”

“What?” You repeated. “I didn’t say anything.”

“Oh, I thought you said something.” Nima flipped her phone over and settled her hand on top of it. You glanced from her face to her phone and back again. A look of misery flickered across her features. You tilted your head in question. “Are you hungry? I’m hungry.”

“Nima.” You crossed the room quickly. “Did they already text back??”

“No. Yes. Maybe?” Nima shook her head. “Not exactly.”

“Nima.”

She twisted her lips and drummed her nails against the plastic case of her phone. You shot her another look and she blew out a sigh. “He sent me a response, but it’s like half an answer. Half a report. We should wait until he can⏤”

“What did he say?”

“Apparently, he’s working on a case for someone else right now and had a database right in front of him so all he had to do was type in⏤”

“Nima, please.” You blurted. It felt like your heart was caught in your throat. You couldn’t breathe and you didn't feel coherent enough to string together a thought. Her hesitance was an answer in and of itself. You rubbed your throat, your other arm wrapping around your torso in a poor attempt to hold yourself together, and gasped. “Just say it.”

“He’s married, babe.” Nima mumbled. You knew the words had been coming, but they still overwhelmed you. The air left your lungs as if someone had gut punched you and you fell back into the seat in front of her desk. “He said he’d send me the certificate when he could, but he has to finish this job first. I’m so sorry. I am so, so sorry. I⏤”

Nima stopped herself from speaking as she came around her desk and wrapped an arm around your shoulders. You sat in her embrace for as long as your shattering mind could endure and then shook your head, “I need a drink. Drinks. Plural.”

“It’s three in the afternoon, babe.” Nima mumbled in concern. You shot her a dry look and she offered you a tight lipped smile. “Drinks it is! Let’s go. We can go back to my place and⏤”

“No.” You pushed to stand. “I wanna go out.”

“Oh… kay. Where?”

“Anywhere.” You turned and began to leave.

Nima was scrambling to gather her belongings into her strawberry shaped purse before rushing out after you. “Just one drink though. I hate being the voice of reason, but we should limit ourselves to one drink.”

One drink turned into two which turned into three which turned into twelve.

By 6 PM, you were borderline wasted. It was by no means the best decision you’ve ever made, but you couldn’t classify it as your worst considering that, for the first time since leaving Vegas, you didn’t feel sad or defeated. No, those blue emotions had turned into a burning shade of red. You had finally found your anger and all it took was copious amounts of alcohol. 

“I mean, married?” You scoffed as you stood at the bar with Nima at your side. “That’s⏤ That’s illegal.” Nima nodded in agreement as she blindly tried to find the straw in her drink with her tongue. You reached out and pushed it toward her lips. “And worse than illegal! It’s fucking rude.”

“So rude.” Nima slurped at the last of her drink and all you could hear was the rattling of ice in her glass. She pulled away to slam the cup down and pointed at you⏤ her pink hair had been let down from the braid to messily rest around her shoulders. “You should get a new sugar daddy!” You stuck your tongue out in disgust and shook your head. “No! This is such a good idea.” Nima began to look around the bar. “Let’s find you a super hot, super not married sugar daddy.”

“I don’t want a new sugar daddy. I want another drink.” You leaned on the bar and waited for the bartender to look your way. Nima and you had bounced to a few bars. The two of you, back when you were sober, decided to start drinking in an area that had multiple bars all within walking distance. The one you were in now wasn’t familiar to you⏤ it wasn’t a place you and Nima had been to before. It was a bit too upscale for your liking. Sober you would not have been a fan. Drunk you? Loving it.

Nima was tapping on your shoulder rapidly and when you looked her way she was pointing across the bar to God knows who. “He looks like he wouldn’t marry someone without your permission.”

“That’s,” You shook your head, “not my situation.”

“Isn’t it?”

“I don’t know.” You shook your head and looked back toward the bartender who was busy with a group of women further down the bar. The sound of vibrating vaguely filled the air and you leaned closer to Nima who immediately wrapped her arms around you in a hug. “You’re vibrating.”

“You’re vibrating.”

You found her purse and opened it so you could rifle through it. It dawned on you then that somewhere around bar two and drink five you had shoved your phone in her purse for safe keeping. When you finally managed to pull it out, Joel’s face was flashing on the screen and you yelped in surprise. You tossed the phone onto the bar and held your face between your hands.

“Oh, no. Oh, no, no.” You shook your head and the vibration stopped. Joel’s picture disappeared and was replaced with a notification of a missed call that joined the notification telling you that you had unread messages. Your eyes snapped to Nima who was trying to drink out of her empty cup again. “Joel.”

“Bastard man.” Nima edited.

“Dinner.” You grimaced. “At 7. I’m supposed to get dinner with Joel at 7. It’s 6:35.”

Nima shook her head and crunched the ice she had shoveled into her mouth, “Bastard man can go to dinner with his wife tonight.”

 You grimaced, “I hate all the words you just used.”

The bartender began to wander over and Nima turned to order more drinks. You picked up your phone and leaned against the bartop with your elbow. With a frown and furrowed brow, you opened your text messages. Every unread text was from Joel unsurprisingly. The first came in at 4:29 and it was a simple, ‘Hey sugar, I’m excited to see you tonight’. The next was almost exactly an hour later and it said, ‘Hope your day’s been alright. We still on for tonight?’. Finally, the most recent at 6:15, was just your name with a question mark.

You set the phone back down before the temptation to reply could overcome you. It only sat on the bartop for a second before it began to vibrate violently as another call came in. Joel’s face filled the screen and you felt a wave of sadness drag you under. The fact that you were mourning the lack of his presence to this degree was probably a sign you were doing this ‘sugar baby’ thing very wrong.

“Maybe I should answer it.” You voiced the thought aloud.

Nima caught it and gasped before slapping her hand on top of the still buzzing phone, “No, ma’am! You will not be doing that.” The bartender set two new drinks between the two of you. Nima pushed one in front of you and moved the straw to point directly at you. “Drink.”

You took a sip then spoke, “I don’t even know the whole story⏤” Nima pushed your face back to the straw so you took another long sip. “Maybe it’s a misunderstanding…” This time your lips found their way to the straw on their own accord and you took a sip that could be argued as dangerously long. “I need to talk to him. Confront him. Demand answers.”

“Yes. To all of that. Eventually.” Nima replied with a nod. She reached forward and bopped you on the nose with her finger. “But not tonight.”

“Why not?”

“Because I know one thing in life,” Nima held up the one finger she used to bop your nose, “You do not have serious conversations while drunk.”

You shook your head with a pout, “I thought you said you don’t like being the voice of reason.”

“If it means helping you, I’ll always lean toward reason, babe.” 

The two of you went back to drinking. Your vibrating phone stopped and a few seconds passed before a notification for a voicemail popped up. You turned to Nima, “Can I listen to it? That’s not talking. That’s listening.”

Nima chewed on her straw slowly before bobbing her head in an affirmative nod, “I shall allow it.”

You picked up the phone to listen to the message he left you.

‘Hey, sugar.’ Joel’s voice rumbled over the line and you felt your chest physically ache at the sound. You closed your eyes in annoyance with yourself. If you hadn’t fallen so hard, so fast for this man you wouldn’t be in this scenario to begin with. ‘Gotta say I’m a little worried. Haven’t heard from ya all day. Gimme a call when ya get this.’

You groaned and set your head down on the bar. Guilt gnawed at you. It felt childish of you to be ghosting him like this, and that wasn’t your typical go to move. You had enough respect for the people in your life to address them when needed rather than hide behind voicemail. With the guilt was a swirling vortex of anger. You were angry at Joel for not being up front with you. You were angry at Yo-Yo for being the one to plant the initial doubt that started all this. You were angry at yourself most of all. Angry that you felt guilt at all, angry that you had foolishly placed so much trust in a man you barely knew, angry that despite everything there was still a part of you that craved his presence. You missed his touch and his voice. You missed those burning brown eyes and the way his very glance could melt you into a puddle.

“You okay, babe?” Nima’s voice asked softly. You shook your head without lifting it. “I’m sorry. I can break his knee caps if you want?”

“What?” You lifted your gaze.

“What?” She replied innocently. 

The phone began to vibrate again startling you. He had just called so you didn’t expect him to call again, but then again you were supposed to be in your apartment waiting for him to pick you up for dinner. You pictured him standing at your door dressed up and holding a bouquet of flowers. Nausea rolled over you in waves, and you grabbed your mixed drink thinking it could cure your troubles.

A few minutes passed before another voicemail was left. You snatched your phone up and shoved it back into Nima’s purse so it would be out of your line of sight⏤ not even bothering to listen to the second voicemail. Tomorrow, you decided. Tomorrow you would confront Joel and have this difficult conversation. You both finished the drinks in front of you as the lively bar continued to thrive around you.

“Why is he married?” You asked suddenly. Nima must have known it wasn’t a question you expected an actual answer to as she stayed silent. You rested your face in your hands and sighed. With your eyes closed against your hands like this you began to feel dizzy. A sure sign that you should stop drinking. Nima rubbed your back soothingly and you dropped your hands to shoot her an appreciative glance. “You’re the best best friend a girl could ask for.”

“I know, babe. And you know what else I know?” Nima squished your cheeks together with a wide grin, “You deserve the universe in a gold hand basket, and any man who can’t see that or who would play games with your big, loving heart doesn’t deserve you.”

You laughed and Nima chuckled herself before letting go of your face to pick up her empty glass. Her tongue struggled to find the straw but once it did she tried to take a big gulp only to get drops and air. Nima pulled away from her straw and furrowed her brow, “Who finished my drink?”

With another laugh, you raised your hand to order two more drinks. At this point you’ve already had so much to drink, what would one more hurt? You knew the hangover tomorrow was going to be a bad one, but a part of you was looking forward to it. There would be no mourning Joel tomorrow if your head hurt too much to even think his name. 

Nima successfully managed to distract you again as she drunkenly delved into a story you weren’t quite following, but you enjoyed the way she told it. A low whistle interrupted the moment of peace the two of you had found. You glanced past Nima to see two men in business suits wandering over. Nothing about them stood out to you. One was brunet and the other blond, but they both looked like they never grew out of the frat lifestyle on a college campus.

“We saw you two pretty ladies from over there and wanted to come and offer you our company.” The blond greeted smugly.

Nima turned in her seat to face him and waved her hand at him while taking a long sip of her drink until the ice rattled in the glass. Then she pulled the straw out of her mouth to finally speak with a shake of her head, “Sorry, we don’t speak english.”

“You just said that in English.” The blond chuckled.

“Sorry, sorry.” Nima waved her hand once more. “I don’t understand your accent.”

You snickered under your breath while chewing on your straw. The brunet stepped forward to stand side by side with the other and shook his head, “No need to be a bitch. We just wanted to talk.”

“Oh, you haven’t even begun to see bitchy yet.” Nima pointed her glass in their direction⏤ a bit of ice sloshing out with the exaggerated movement. “I can show you bitchy.” She reached back to swat at your arm. “Tell them, babe.”

“She can.” You nodded in agreement.

The blond set a hand on his friend’s shoulder and tugged him back, “Let’s just go, man.”

The brunet reluctantly let himself get dragged away, but he continued to stare at you and Nima the entire time. Nima spun in her seat and scoffed, “Where was I before I was interrupted by douchebag one and douchebag two?”

“I’m not gonna lie,” You shrugged, “I have no idea.”

“I’ll pick a place then.” Nima said and jumped into the middle of her story. “So, there I was covered head to toe in honey.”

Same as before, you really couldn’t keep track of her tale but it amused you all the same. The two of you chatted for another minute or two before a new face came across the two of you again. Nima had bounced in her seat, excited, and it knocked her strawberry shaped purse to the floor. Your phone clattered out. Before you could climb off the bar stool to grab it, a man passing knelt down and scooped it up. In one tanned hand he grabbed the purse and in the other your phone. The phone’s screen lit up and you swallowed at the sight of the multiple missed messages all from the same person. 

“Oh.” The man cleared his throat and straightened his stance. He was handsome with a kind face. Dark hair, a bit on the longer side, was messily pushed back and it matched the scruff on his upper lip and chin. The man wore a pink button up shirt, all the buttons undone, over a white t-shirt. “I suppose this is yours, miss?”

You begun to reach out, “Thanks⏤”

“Hold it!” Nima pointed at the man making his dark, brown eyes widen. “State your intentions, sir!”

“To…return your purse?” He lifted up the strawberry bag.

Nima narrowed her eyes at him and snatched it away, “Likely story.”

“Thank you.” You reached out and he handed the phone over to you. A glance down revealed four missed calls, two unheard voicemails, and five texts. You winced at the sight and set your phone face down on the bar. You were surprised to see the man still standing by your stools. “You…” You narrowed your eyes at him. “You look familiar. Have we met before?”

He chuckled and shook his head, “Afraid not, ma’am.”

It was sitting on the tip of your tongue, but your foggy brain just couldn’t quite grasp it. Nima snapped her fingers and pointed at him. “I got it. He’s that guy.” You lifted an eyebrow at her words and she nodded frantically. “Yeah, he’s that actor! You play in that one show with, like, the zombies or whatever, right?”

“Not at all.” He laughed with a shake of his head. “I ain’t no actor.”

“Well then, I’m out of guesses.” Nima grumbled. She tilted her head, looking him up and down once more, “You seem nice enough. Got a pretty face. You rich? You wanna be a sugar daddy? She’s in the market.”

You rolled your eyes, “Nima.”

“You’re in the market for a sugar daddy?” The man asked in shock. You could hardly blame the man for his confusion and disbelief. This was hardly a normal bar conversation. “Really?”

“No. She’s just drunk.”

“Irrelevant.” Nima argued.

You chuckled then introduced yourself and Nima. The man paused for a beat before nodding and offering you his hand. “Nice to meet you both. My name is Tommy.” It took a second to click, but once the name finally wormed its way through your mind your eyes widened. Tommy chuckled and answered your unspoken question, “Yeah. I am.”

Nima glanced between you two with a frown, “Hold on, I’m not following. You are what? You’ll be her new sugar daddy?”

“No way in hell.” Tommy grinned. “If I even thought 'bout it, my brother’d skin me alive.”

The look on Nima’s face stayed confused until you swallowed the lump in your throat and finally spoke, “It’s… Nima, this is Joel’s brother.”

Her face remained frozen before morphing into one of shock. She gasped, almost comically, and pointed at him. “Oh, fuck.” Her eyebrows furrowed into a glare. “You son of a bitch, your brother is a son of a bitch!”

Tommy didn’t pay her outburst any mind, but his eyes darted back to you. “I asked my brother to come out drinkin' with me tonight, but he said ‘no’ cause he had a date with you.” Tommy stuck his hands into his pockets. “Funny I’m findin' you here without him.”

“That’s because your brother is too busy with his wife to be with my girl!”

Tommy’s eyebrows furrowed in surprise and he glanced back to you, “He already told you about her?”

It was quite possibly the worst string of words you could have heard all day. Only in competition with Nima’s ‘He’s married, babe’. You felt nauseous and dizzy⏤ the breath stolen from you again. Nima was arguing with Tommy, you could hear her voice, but you couldn’t concretely understand a single word that was said. When you finally managed to get a handle on reality, you looked back to see things had fallen apart and more time than you realized had passed in your mental breakdown. 

The blond and brunet from earlier, in the suits, had come back and were somehow arguing with Tommy and Nima now. You suddenly began to regret the last two drinks you had. Maybe if you had gone with a couple glasses of water instead you’d be able to puzzle out exactly what was going on right now.

“Get the hell outta here. They ain’t interested.” Tommy snapped.

“Just curious as to why we weren’t good enough for these bitches and you were.” The brunet slurred his words. Tommy stood a step in front of Nima who had slid off her bar stool to stand in front of you with her hands on her hips. “What’s so special about you, bub?”

“Ugh. How about the two of you run off to the bathroom and jack each other off, huh? Then leave us the fuck alone.” Nima sneered.

“Shut your damn mouth!” 

The blond tried to push past Tommy toward Nima, but Tommy shoved him back immediately. He grabbed the guy by the collar. “You gonna charge at a woman like that? Fuckin' coward.” Tommy’s voice came out in a gravelly growl that reminded you so much of Joel that it was staggering. “You got a problem, you take it up with me.”

The next moment happened fast. The blond tried to swing out at Tommy so Tommy blocked it with his elbow before tackling the man to the ground. The brunet grabbed Nima and wrapped his arms around her. She howled in anger and squirmed in his arms trying to find purchase to hit him. The brunet spun so his back was to you and you slid off the stool. Without pause, without thought, you picked up your empty glass and smashed it to the back of the man’s head. He released Nima, crumpling to the ground with a groan, and any shred of a fight stopped⏤as did the entire bar.

Tommy was kneeling on the ground pinning the blond while Nima stood off to the side.

“Oh my God.” Nima squealed, amused.

“Oh my God.” Tommy blurted, impressed.

“Oh my God.” You gasped, shocked at your own action.

You were panting, damn near hyperventilating, as the brunet began to rise on shaky limbs. Other patrons nearby converged on the scene to help out and before you knew it you were being ushered off to the side where a few couches and seats sat in a lounge area. 

“You’re such a badass.” Nima gushed from beside you. "How’s your hand??”

“Hurts.” You mumbled and stared down at the white cloth wrapped around your hand. Bright red was beginning to seep through. The consequences of smashing glass against the back of someone’s skull. Police had shown up and you knew Tommy was across the room talking to them. But still, your eyes stayed glued on your hand. The cuts weren’t terrible but they stung something awful.

“Babe?” You finally looked up and met Nima’s concerned eyes. She nodded, “You alright?”

You shot her a small smile, “Yeah. Are you okay? I can’t believe he grabbed you.”

“I’m fine.” Nima peeked at your hand then stood. “I’m gonna see if this bar has a real first aid kit we can use. Be right back.”

She jumped up and jogged over to the bar. You sunk in your seat with a sigh and leaned your head against the back of the couch. There had been something very sobering about smashing the glass against that guy’s head. The adrenaline and pain cleared any lingering fog from your previous drinks right out of your head. It left room for you to think about Joel. Meeting his brother certainly didn’t help. Tommy clapped one of the officer’s on the shoulder with a smile and they went separate ways. You lifted your head when you heard his footsteps draw near.

“Well, I spoke to the police.” Tommy stuck his hands into his pockets. “You’re not gonna get in trouble for the, you know, the glass. Won’t have to go downtown with ‘em.” You breathed a sigh of relief. Tommy held your gaze for a few more seconds before scrunching his nose and bobbing his head toward you. “And Joel is, uh, on his way.”

You covered your face with your good hand and groaned, “Can I please just be arrested instead?”

“Sorry, no can do.” Tommy sat down beside you. “You know, I didn’t say it earlier, but it’s nice to finally meet you. Joel never shuts up about you.”

“Please. Don’t.” You blurted. “I can’t… I can’t talk about him right now.”

Tommy nodded, “Right. I, uh, when I called him we didn’t talk much.” He laced his fingers together and rested his arms on his knees. “I mentioned you were hurt and things kind of spiraled from there. That’s probably for the best though. I don’t wanna get in between a lover’s quarrel⏤”

“I’m not his lover.” You snapped, and you hated the way your voice cracked. You shook your head, “Not if he’s married. Not…” The adrenaline was beginning to wear off and you were exhausted to your very bones. “This is so fucked up. I never should've agreed to…

Tommy didn’t immediately reply. He sighed, “I don’t know you, and I don’t got the exact details of what’s going on right now, but… I’m glad you agreed.” He turned and met your gaze with a tight smile. “Joel’s been… He’s been better. Joel was in a rut for a long time. So long that I kind of forgot he was in one. For a while, that was just Joel.” Tommy’s smile grew as he chuckled. “But ever since the two of you met, it’s like this weight has been lifted from his shoulders. We’ve all noticed it, and we’re all thankful.”

  “He’s married.” You whispered. “And he didn’t tell me.”

Tommy rubbed the back of his neck, “I know, but it’s⏤ it’s not that simple.” He nervously chewed on his lower lip. “Can you just give him a chance to explain?” You flexed your hand and sucked in a sharp breath as pain lanced up your arm. “Consider it a favor for me.”

“A favor for you?” You snorted.

“Yeah. I kept you out of prison, remember?” Tommy joked.

You cracked a smile and Tommy’s smile widened in victory. Nima skipped back over and dropped into the seat on your other side. She pulled your hand into her lap and carefully unpeeled the cloth away. As Nima rewrapped your hand while Tommy criticized her technique and the two bickered over you. You couldn’t help but flex your hand when she finished.

“Come on, pinkie.” Tommy stood. “I’ll take you home.”

“Uh, I am not leaving my girl here alone.”

“Joel will be here soon.”

“Then I’m definitely not leaving her alone!”

You reached out to squeeze her wrist and gave her a reassuring nod, “I’ll be okay. Gotta talk to him eventually, right?”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t have to be right now.” Nima argued. You pulled her into a hug to reassure her once again. Maybe this was a bad idea, but you had just smashed a glass against a guy’s head so the degree of your bad ideas couldn't possibly get worse. Nima sighed and stood up too. “Okay. You’re sure you’re fine?”

Tommy clapped his hands. “Joel’s a few minutes away. But we can stay until he gets here if you want.”

“No.” You shook your head. The thought of being alone for a minute was kind of nice. “You guys go.” Your eyes locked onto Nima. “If you’re okay with him driving you.” You glanced at Tommy. “No offense.”

He held his hands up in surrender and shrugged nonchalantly. Nima nodded, “We survived a bar brawl together. We’re bonded.” She grinned and pulled her strawberry purse around her shoulders. “Plus, worse comes to worse, I can stab him.”

“You can what now?” Tommy questioned.

“You’ve already offered me a ride. It’s too late to back out now.”

“Fine, pinkie.” Tommy waved her to follow. 

You watched them go and sunk in your seat. The sounds of the bar was decent background noise, but it wasn’t enough to drown out the noise in your head. You picked at the edges of the gauze wrapped around your hand. Your eyes felt heavy and if you weren’t careful you were going to pass out on this bar couch surrounded by strangers. It was the sound of a crash that startled you back into the moment, and when you looked up from your hand you realized the door had been thrown open hard enough to hit the wall. Joel stood in the doorway panicked and wild eyed. He wore a suit without the tie and his shirt was unbuttoned at the top.

You stayed silent, sinking further into your seat, and watched as Joel’s wide eyes scanned the room. His gaze finally landed on you, doing a double take, and when he realized where you were you saw his shoulders slump in relief. Joel jogged across the room until he was able to kneel down in front of you. Joel’s warm hands found your face, cupping it softly, as he sighed, “Sugar, what the hell is goin' on? Are you okay?” Joel’s eyes studied your face then glanced down at your hand. “Jesus, your hand. Tommy called me. Sugar, I⏤”

“I’m okay.” You whispered, throat growing tight, “I just wanna go home, Joel.”

Joel tensed and he nodded, “Yeah. Alright. Let’s get you home.”

The ride in the truck beside Joel may have been the most awkward and tense ride of your entire life. It was silent. The only sound coming from the road outside. Joel’s hands were white knuckled around the steering wheel. You assumed his tension had something to do with you ghosting him this evening. His truck pulled up outside your apartment complex and your alcohol soaked brain realized not only did you not have your keys but you also no longer had your phone. Both were sitting in Nima’s purse right now.

You opened the door fully prepared to sleep outside your apartment on the welcome mat like a lost dog, but Joel grasped you by the arm cautiously to hold you in place. “You got your key?” You twisted your lips knowing he wasn’t going to fall for a lie. “Where is your key?”

“With Nima.” You mumbled. “She has my phone too.”

Joel sighed and let go of you to instead grab the truck door and shut it. He buckled you back into the seat and began to drive once more. You wanted to ask where he was taking you, but none of the words would come out. You drowned in your indecision while picking at the bandage on your hand. Joel suddenly reached over and lightly pushed your hand away from the injury.

“Stop pickin' at it, sugar.”

“Where are we going?” You blurted.

Joel shifted in his seat, “My place.”

“I don’t wanna go to your place.” You mumbled.

“Don’t care.” Joel replied gruffly and you lifted your head to glare at his side profile. 

The tone of his voice stirred something inside you, and you felt the dormant anger start to reawaken. It had gotten buried under everything that happened, but now it was back full fledged. You sat up, “Take me back. I want to go home.”

“You don’t have your key.”

“I don’t care.” You snapped. “Take me home, Joel!”

“You’re comin' to my place where I know you can safely sleep it off, 'nd then tomorrow we’ll figure out how to get ya back into your apartment. Understood?”

You scoffed, “Don’t talk down to me. I’m not a child, Joel.”

“Oh, you’re not?” Joel scoffed. His tone was angry and frustrated. “Cause you’re sure as hell actin' like one.” He shot a glare in your direction before focusing back on the road. “Are you outta your goddamn mind?! Do you know how worried I was?” You crossed your arms and stared out the passenger window. “I don’ hear from you all day long. You disappear on me with no explanation 'nd then I get a call from my baby brother that you’ve been in a bar fight? And that you’re hurt?!” You stayed silent and Joel scoffed. “And now I get the silent treatment? Very mature.”

“You don’t want to argue with me on what’s mature, Joel.” You said, head whipping back to glare at him.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean??”

“You’re a hypocrite!”

“Excuse me?”

You scoffed, “It’s not very mature for a married man to pay a sugar baby for attention.” Joel hit the brakes and the seat belt caught you as the truck screeched to a stop. You glanced out the window to see his truck had reached a neighborhood and the streets were mostly void of other vehicles. When you turned back to Joel, you found him staring at you in a mix of shock and horror. You shook your head, “What was I, Joel? Some kind of midlife crisis?”

Pain could be seen through the horror, and he reached out to grab your wrist again. “No. No, that’s not…” Joel’s voice was hoarse and broken. He whispered your name. “Please. That’s not what this is.”

You tugged your arm away from his grip. “I don’t wanna talk about this right now, Joel. Either start driving again or I’m gonna get out.”

Joel kept his hands to himself as he slowly went back to driving. As if the awkward silence hadn’t been painful before it was downright agonizing now. You were pressing your thumb into the wounds of your palm just to try and keep from crying. Joel pulled into the driveway a few minutes later, and you couldn’t even get your brain to collect a single feature of the house in front of you. Joel jumped out of the truck and you stayed frozen. The passenger door opened but Joel didn’t move to pull you out. He held the top of the door frame and a foot rested on the running board so he could lean in just marginally.

“Sugar…”

“Don’t, Joel.” You said firmly. “Don’t.”

“Please just let me⏤”

“Are you married?”

Joel’s face crumpled in agony and he hung his head, “It’s… It’s not that simple. Just let me⏤”

“It’s a yes or no question.” You shrugged and tried to ignore the tears welling up in your eyes.

Joel looked like he was on the verge of a panic attack. His eyes were squeezed shut, but he still refused to answer. You whispered his name. Finally, he lifted his gaze back to you and opened his mouth. His jaw hung open silently for a second before he could speak. “...Yes.”

You felt the tears lingering at the waterline drip down your cheeks and hastily began to wipe them away with your hands. Joel gasped and began to reach out but when you flinched he held back. He shook his head, “You’re bleedin'.”

The bandage around your hand was soaked with blood, probably from digging your thumb into the wounds, and when you felt your cheek with your fingertips they came back tinted red. You must have smeared it across your face. 

“Sugar, let me… let me take you inside.” Joel murmured. “Please. I know you’re… upset, 'nd you have every reason to hate me right now, but… just let me get you inside.” His hand reached out for you once more, but he stopped himself. “You can leave in the mornin', but for tonight just⏤ just let me take care of you. Please.”

You gave a small nod. It felt weak of you, but you reassured yourself that you had little to no other option. Your hand hurt, your head ached, you were exhausted to your very being, and deep down you were torn between wanting to yell and scream or curl into a ball and cry. Joel took a few steps back to allow you to climb down yourself, but when you wavered his arms shot out to try and steady you. Joel herded you toward the front door without actually touching you. 

Your eyebrows furrowed when you studied his front porch. The entire front of his house didn’t look like the typical rich LA style you were accustomed to seeing. In fact, his porch and front door reminded you of a quaint farmhouse. Joel unlocked his front door and held it open for you to walk in. Right inside the house, the foyer had an open style with a set of stairs pressed against the wall just up ahead. It opened straight into a large living room that evolved into a dining room with a matching open kitchen to the side. The entire back wall by the kitchen and dining area was made of glass but the back porch lights were off so you couldn’t see the view. 

Joel tossed his keys into a bowl sitting on an accent table against the wall right by the door. You glanced over to a little bench built into the wall on the other side beneath a set of bay windows. The rest of his furniture from what you could see was modern and plain. You were drunk off alcohol and misery, but your brain was still able to take the time to note that Joel’s furniture didn’t match what you imagined him to have.

“C’mon.” Joel motioned you up the stairs. He followed after you and when you reached the top of the stairs he pointed to the left. You stepped into the master bedroom and Joel slid in past you moving straight toward the master bath. While he rooted around for something, you glanced around his room. There was a king sized bed sitting in the middle of the room covered in dark green sheets. A window sat on either side of the bed. The wall to the right was where the bathroom door and the closet door sat, but on the left was a single loveseat pushed against the wall. All the furniture was dark brown including the large dresser against the wall by the door and the smaller bedside drawers on either side of the bed under the windows. You drifted toward one of the bedside drawers where a photo was propped up. It was of Joel and two young girls. Joel had shown you enough pictures of Sarah and Ellie for you to recognize them, but in this photo all three of them were significantly younger. 

The sound of a throat clearing made you look up to see Joel standing there with a first aid kit in hand. “Sit down for me?” You sat on the side of the bed and Joel sat beside you. He opened the kit then carefully unwrapped your hand. When he saw the three lines haphazardly cut into your palm he let out a soft hiss. “You hurtin' much?”

“It stings some.” You mumbled. He hummed in response and used an alcohol swab to clean up the cuts. Joel did so with soft touches and his eyes flickered to your features every second or so to check in on your status. You locked your jaw to bite back any sounds of pain that tried to slip out. 

“They look bad, but I don’ think they’ll need stitches.” Joel thought out loud. 

“Good.” You said. Joel grabbed some fresh gauze and began to wrap it around your hand. You studied his features as he focused so intently on the task at hand. His warm gaze was burned into your skin as his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. You had the urge to trace your fingers through the scruff along his jawline. When he finished, he lifted his gaze and his eyes locked with yours. The two of you stared at one another in tense silence. Pain and longing filled his brown eyes, and you wondered if it could somehow just be a reflection of your own. It made no sense for you to both be so miserable right now. “Where is she?”

Joel tensed, “What?”

“Where is your wife?” You asked more firmly. 

“Are you sure you wanna get into this tonight?”

“I just want answers, Joel.” You sighed. “I need something. My mind has been a mess since we left Vegas.” Joel’s face crumpled as he closed his eyes with a sigh. “Yo-yo told me I wasn’t your first sugar baby and then she said you were married to your first sugar baby.” The words were falling out like pouring water now. “And then Nima has a cousin who has a cousin who has a friend or something that was able to find your marriage certificate⏤”

Joel murmured your name in reverence and opened his eyes. He shook his head. “I’m sorry. I should’ve told you from the start. That way there’d be no miscommunication or confusion. I meant to. But… I kept puttin' it off 'nd it got to the point where too much time had passed…” Joel hesitantly reached out for you and when you didn’t shy away he settled his hand on your arm. “I did have a sugar baby before you. It’s a… long story, but I am not married to her.” 

Your eyebrows furrowed, “You didn’t marry her?”

“No. Absolutely not. She was… Like I said, it’s a long story.” Joel squeezed your arm. “One that I promise to tell you. In the mornin', when you’re not half drunk 'nd half hungover all at once.”

“Then who the hell are you married to, Joel?”

“I… I am technically still married to Celina.” Joel finally spat the words out. You shook your head in confusion. The name was foreign to you, but Joel heaved another sigh and added, “Sarah’s mom.”

taglist (closed):

@weddingfairy @bfences @jasminedragon @biwitchy @huffle-punk @shelbyteller @anoverwhelmingdin @aheadfullofsteverogers @stagerightlauren @basicoccult @boofy1998 @farintonorth @thepascalofus @amatis-gray @casa-boiardi @northernbluess @jettia @sapphicsoie @spidey-3 @hrtsforpascal @gingersince97 @sentients17 @bigboiseason123 @lunxramour @ktheunready @heyheyheygaypay @keepingupwiththeskywalkers @adoringanakin @come-hell-or-eldren-fire @cherriebat @whitewolfstar01 @alyssa121611 @asreadbyaj @painfullyandprettypoetic @cantobightcafe @str84pedro

[previous][next]

✨J.M. Masterlist✨

[uswnt5]

Love the Tobin Cody hug you can see all the in-laws hugging, Lindsay and Cody, tobs and Cody’s partner, Fran hugging Lindsay’s brother, it’s just seeing a big extended family that are all familiar with each other that makes me so happy

I know! loved that about that video too. They're all so familiar and comfortable with each other which says so much about the whole group.

I also have on video a cute part where all C/T guys friends are hugging each other. Will, James and Nima all hugging haha I love it.

[crownrots]

C? 💕💕

CINDY WARD — for tcsmg’s new game mode that’s dropping whenever! she’s a college student (studying literature) and horror / sci-fi fiend 😌 she works off campus at the local video store and just generally keeps to herself and likes to fill her free time either reading or hanging out at the local drive in on their least busy days. she’s also got an uncanny resemblance (same fc, i’m unoriginal 😞) to perry (another tcsmg clown) so, when johnny starts snooping around the campus it’s on sight

CHARLIE BURCH — dbd verse charlie is an up and coming insta influencer / model and sugar baby that’s taken by the entity during a luxury vacation in the 2010s. there’s a whole media storm and true crime baddies ate that case up since her sugar daddy was charged with her disappearance. tcsm (its own universe set in the early / mid 2000s) charlie is still a sugar baby but she’s also a petty thief who ends up going on the run after she stole from the wrong dude. she ends up meeting @queennymeria’s cecil after her car breaks down, steals his expensive camera after a one night stand and wants to pawn it for money to get the hell outta texas but it doesn’t work out that way 😙

CHARON BROUSSARD — vtmb 🦇. brujah he was embraced in the 1300s. he’s the owner of the popular bar / tourist attraction ‘hallowed ground’ that used to be an old church in new orleans. it’s pretty neutral territory with a mixing pot of outcasts that hang out in the back of the bar. he’s been a situationship with @queennymeria ‘s nima, after he ghosted her for like nearly forty years 👹

[susanhorak]

#دعاء #اذكار #الله #قرآن #خواطر #رمضان #قران #اسلاميات #اللهم #الحمدلله #الله_اكبر #اللهم_آمين #سبحان_الله #اللهم_اغفرلي #استغفار #استغفر_الله #تسبيح #نور_ذكر_الله حسبنا الله ونعم الوكيل ,دعاء حسبي الله ونعم الوكيل ,ذكار,ادعية , نور ذكر الله

أقوى دعاء على من ظلمك حسبي الله ونعم الوكيل https://youtu.be/izL9nnkD8JA

اذكار الصباح والمساء,نور ذكر الله,حسبي الله ونعم الوكيل,دعاء,الدعاء,اذكار,ادعية,اذكار الصباح,اذكار المساء,أذكار المساء,اذكار صباح,الاذكار المساء,أذكار صباح,adhkar,adkar al masa,adhkar du matin,حسبنا الله ونعم الوكيل,حسبي الله,حسبي,الله,ونعم,حسبنا,hasbiya,allah,wani3ma,lwakil,hasbi,wa ni3ma,hasbia,wa nima,wakil,Hasbun,Wa Ni'mal,Wakeel,حسبي اللة ونعم الوكيل,حسبيالله ونعم الوكيل,وحسبنا الله ونعم الوكيل,حسبنا الله ونعم الوكيل,حسبي الله ونعم الوكيل فيك

اشترك معنا قناة نور ذكر الله http://www.youtube.com/c/Noorone. ساعدنا علي الإستمرار في العطاء من خلال عمل مشاركة وكتابة تعليق و الاشتراك في لمزيد من الفيديوهات الإسلامية

[phedre-delunay]

Quando fai l amore è il tuo essere a farlo..

Il tuo guscio..

I tuoi corpi..

Un intreccio con un altra A-nima..

Un altro essere che , viaggia, sulla stessa onda

Un altra luce, un altra forma, un altra...

È scambio perfetto tra due principi universali.

Presenti in tutto l universo..

È.. di se stessi, del proprio intimo pensiero.

Conoscenza..

Un altalena continua tra due '"forze'"..

si attraggono e si respingono nel medesimo istante .

Un abbraccio tra le menti , un sorriso tra i corpi fusi e nudi.

Un miscelarsi, perdere la propria forma. Bisogna perdersi per poi ritrovarsi..

In una forma comune, insieme, una dualità mai stata.

Un unica vibrazione..

Un mutuo alternarsi tra due opposti in continuo mutamento l uno nell altro.

Non c è più corpo, non c è più spirito, non c'è più niente..

Ma c è "tutto"☯️❤️

Quando l'anima si evolve ad una dimensione interiore di dualità, l'essenza divina prende forma in noi per vivere in armonia con chi si ama .

L'amore è arte .L'arte di disegni geometrici sui nostri corpi nudi , sulla nostra mente spoglia di ogni pudure .

L'arte non accetta comportamenti diplomatici .

La cura e la stessa malattia non può essere una salvezza per nessun malato d'amore, passione, trasgressione.

Sono l'elemento che cura e ti ammala

V Campidoglio

[444namesplus]

1* 2.6.2. 3 3B2 5.0i 5.1 5.53 7 15kg 17 20 22nd 26 50BMG 51 69 97 312 411 414 707 737 747 757 767 777 868 888 1071 1080H 1911 1984 1997 2600 3848 8182 $ & ^ ^? a ABC ACC Active ADIU advise advisors afsatcom AFSPC AHPCRC AIEWS AIMSX Aladdin Alica Alouette AMEMB Amherst AMW anarchy ANC Anonymous AOL ARC Archives Area51 argus Armani ARPA Artichoke ASIO ASIS ASLET assasinate Asset AT AT&T Atlas Audiotel Austin AVN b b9 B.D.M. Badger bank basement BATF BBE BECCA Becker beef Bess bet Beyond BfV BITNET black-bag Black-Ops Blackbird Blacklisted Blackmednet Blacknet Bletchley Blowfish Blowpipe BMDO BND Bob BOP BOSS botux BRLO Broadside Bubba bullion BVD BZ c Cable CANSLO Cap-Stun Capricorn card Case CATO CBM CBNRC CBOT CCC CCS CDA CDC CdC cdi Cell CESID CFC chaining chameleon Chan Chelsea Chicago Chobetsu chosen CIA CID CIDA CIM CIO CIS CISE Clandestine Class clone cocaine COCOT Coderpunks codes Cohiba Colonel Comirex Competitor Compsec Computer Connections Consul Consulting CONUS Cornflower Corporate Corporation COS COSMOS Counter counterintelligence Counterterrorism Covert Cowboy CQB CRA credit cryptanalysis crypto-anarchy CSE csystems CTP CTU CUD cybercash Cypherpunks d D-11 Daisy Data data data-haven DATTA DCJFTF Dead DEADBEEF debugging DefCon Defcon Defense Defensive Delta DERA DES DEVGRP DF DIA Dictionary Digicash disruption

DITSA DJC DOE Dolch domestic Domination DRA DREC DREO DSD DSS Duress DynCorp E911 e-cash E.O.D. E.T. EADA eavesdropping Echelon EDI EG&G Egret Electronic ELF Elvis Embassy Encryption encryption enigma EO EOD ESN Espionage espionage ETA eternity EUB Evaluation Event executive Exon explicit Face fangs Fax FBI FBIS FCIC FDM Fetish FINCEN finks Firewalls FIS fish fissionable FKS FLAME Flame Flashbangs FLETC Flintlock FLiR Flu FMS Force force Fort Forte fraud freedom Freeh froglegs FSB Ft. FX FXR Gamma Gap garbage Gates Gatt GCHQ GEO GEODSS GEOS Geraldton GGL GIGN Gist Global Glock GOE Goodwin Gorelick gorilla Gorizont government GPMG Gray grom Grove GRU GSA GSG-9 GSS gun Guppy H&K H.N.P. Hackers HAHO Halcon Halibut HALO Harvard hate havens HIC High Hillal HoHoCon Hollyhock Hope House HPCC HRT HTCIA humint Hutsul IACIS IB ICE ID IDEA IDF IDP illuminati imagery IMF Indigo industrial Information INFOSEC InfoSec Infowar Infrastructure Ingram INR INS Intelligence intelligence interception Internet Intiso Investigation Ionosphere IRIDF Iris IRS IS ISA ISACA ISI ISN ISS IW jack JANET Jasmine JAVA JICC jihad JITEM Juile Juiliett Keyhole keywords Kh-11 Kilderkin Kilo Kiwi KLM l0ck LABLINK Lacrosse Lebed LEETAC Leitrim Lexis-Nexis LF LLC loch lock Locks Loin Love LRTS LUK Lynch M5 M72750 M-14 M.P.R.I. Mac-10 Mace Macintosh Magazine mailbomb man Mantis market Masuda Mavricks Mayfly MCI MD2 MD4 MD5 MDA Meade Medco mega Menwith Merlin Meta-hackers MF MI5 MI6 MI-17 Middleman Military Minox MIT MITM MOD MOIS mol Mole Morwenstow Mossberg MP5k MP5K-SD MSCJ MSEE MSNBC MSW MYK NACSI NATIA National NATOA NAVWAN NAVWCWPNS NB NCCS NCSA Nerd News niche NIJ Nike NIMA ninja nitrate nkvd NOCS noise NORAD NRC NRL NRO NSA NSCT NSG NSP NSWC NTIS NTT Nuclear nuclear NVD OAU Offensive Oratory Ortega orthodox Oscor OSS OTP package Panama Park passwd Passwords Patel PBX PCS Peering PEM penrep Perl-RSA PFS PGP Phon-e phones PI picking

Pine pink Pixar PLA Planet-1 Platform Playboy plutonium POCSAG Police Porno Pornstars Posse PPP PPS president press-release Pretoria Priavacy primacord PRIME Propaganda Protection PSAC Pseudonyms Psyops PTT quiche r00t racal RAID rail Rand Rapid RCMP Reaction rebels Recce Red redheads Reflection remailers ReMOB Reno replay Retinal RFI rhost rhosts RIT RL rogue Rolm Ronco Roswell RSA RSP RUOP RX-7 S.A.I.C. S.E.T. S/Key SABC SACLANT SADF SADMS Salsa SAP SAR Sardine sardine SAS SASP SASR Satellite SBI SBIRS SBS SCIF screws Scully SDI SEAL Sears Secert secret Secure secure Security SEL SEMTEX SERT server Service SETA Sex SGC SGDN SGI SHA SHAPE Shayet-13 Shell shell SHF SIG SIGDASYS SIGDEV sigvoice siliconpimp SIN SIRC SISDE SISMI Skytel SL-1 SLI SLIP smuggle sneakers sniper snuffle SONANGOL SORO Soros SORT Speakeasy speedbump Spetznaz Sphinx spies Spoke Sponge spook Spyderco squib SRI ssa SSCI SSL stakeout Standford STARLAN Stego STEP Stephanie Steve Submarine subversives Sugar SUKLO SUN Sundevil supercomputer Surveillance SURVIAC SUSLO SVR SWAT sweep sweeping SWS Talent TDM. TDR TDYC Team Telex TELINT Templeton TEMPSET Terrorism Texas TEXTA. THAAD the Ti TIE Tie-fighter Time toad Tools top TOS Tower transfer TRD Trump TRW TSCI TSCM TUSA TWA UDT UHF UKUSA unclassified UNCPCJ Undercover Underground Unix unix UOP USACIL USAFA USCG USCODE USCOI USDOJ USP USSS UT/RUS utopia UTU UXO Uzi V veggie Verisign VHF Video Vinnell VIP Virii virtual virus VLSI VNET W3 Wackendude Wackenhutt Waihopai WANK Warfare Weekly White white Whitewater William WINGS wire Wireless words World WORM X XS4ALL Yakima Yobie York Yukon Zen zip zone ~

[hanbunmensch]

DBHサントラアナログレコードVol.2買った

　少し前に『Detroit: Become Human Original Soundtrack Volume 2』を買った。もう売り切れてしまって公式サイトの商品ページも消えているが（2023年2月19日現在）、そのうちまた万が一再販されたりバカみたいな高値でヤフオクやそこらに出てきたりした時に誰かの参考になるかもしれないので、まあレビューじゃないが感想というか、分かる範囲での解説のようなものを書いておく。

内容

　ジャケット。特に印刷凝ってる系という感じではなさそう。 　作中アンドロイドの服に腕章とセットでデザインされた三角バッジは、強制収容所でユダヤ人はじめ各種囚人がカテゴリーで色分けされて付けさせられたバッジが元ネタかと思われるので、まあ三角形自体はごく基本的な図形だしANDROIDのAの幾何的な処理にも見せつつゲーム全体のUIに応用もしていたものの、こうシンボリックな意匠として用いられると否応にも文脈が強い。バックに薄く見える絵はチャプター『ジェリコ』で駐車場奥の壁に描かれていたもので、マーカスがスキャンする場面があった。ジャケット表には服従の三角形に内部構造の露出した横顔、裏にはジェリコのシンボル、叛逆の逆三角形に皮膚を纏った「人間」に見える横顔が配置されている。分かりやすいと言えば分かりやすいか。

　LPはカラークリアヴァイナル仕様。この青は美しい。 　よくあるサカサカしたビニールスリーブなしで、コート紙のスリーブに直接レコードが入っていた。初めて開封した時ビッタリ張り付いていて端を破ってしまった。 　スリーブデザインはA盤がマーカス、カーラ、B盤がコナー、ハンク。4面分キャラクターを載せたいのに主人公が3人しかいない、というのはなにげに困りそうな気もする。ハンクは他にも重要度の高い主要キャラであるアリスやノースとどう区別しうるのか微妙なところで（なんならアリスとは別れたらカーラ編が終了するし、ノースはマーカスの代理で物語を進行できることを考えると、ハンクはごく一般主要キャラ枠ではある）、フェアさ重視だとST200・メニュークロエとかの方が良さそうにも思うが、ここでハンクにしとくのは顧客をよく見ているというか、分かる判断だとも思う。後で細かく言及するが、実際B盤収録の挿入曲は結構ハンクが関係する場面で流れるものが多い。

　ジャケット中面。ちょっとした紹介文が書いてある。テキストと呼べるものはここだけで、読み物的な要素は特にない。 　ちなみにこの紹介文、2038を2036と誤植している。E3トレーラーとか、製品版のゲームにも残骸として2036年の日付を視認できる箇所があったので、当初の設定がそうだったものと推測している。なん��中の人も混乱してるのかもしれない。あとThe Britemoresのバンド名誤植と、カーラの曲のタイトル間違いがあった。

収録曲

　当たり前だけどサントラ全曲だと3時間45分もあるので、レコードに収録されているのはほんの一部で、多分なんかこうコンセプチュアルに選曲しているのだと思う。 　初めにみんな知ってそうな前提知識として、DBHは主人公ごとに作曲家が分かれており、Philip Sheppardがカーラ編、John Paesanoがマーカス編、Nima Fakhraraがコナー編を担当している。もっと前にリリースされたVol.1のレコードでは、各主人公のメインテーマと、作者作曲のオープニングテーマに加えて、主人公ごとにストーリーを追っていく構成で劇伴を収録していて、『サイバーライフタワー』『旅立ち（川）』『行進』ルートがイメージされているようだった（Vol.1は持っていないが、ネット上のジャケ画で収録曲をうっすら読めるものがあった）。今回のVol.2では、A盤にVol.1と被らないラインナップで劇伴を収録し、B盤には挿入曲を収録している。 　まずA盤（劇伴）の収録曲は以下。スネ夫が自慢話をする時に方式で使用シーンの説明を添えておく。

A1 1. Nima Fakhrara - Your Choice（『人質』ダニエルと交渉する時の曲） 2. Philip Sheppard - By Firelight（就寝前にアリスと話す時とかの曲） 3. John Paesano - Epilogue（使用シーン特定できず） 4. John Paesano - Father and Son（『画家』カールを起こす時の曲） 5. John Paesano - Time to Decide（『失意』レオを押すか耐えるか選ぶ時の曲） 6. John Paesano - The Junkyard（『死の淵』廃棄場で部品を探す時の曲） 7. John Paesano - We Are Not Afraid （『キャピトルパーク』突入準備をする時の曲） 8. John Paesano - I Can't Let My People Die（『交わる運命』ジェリコの爆破に向かう時の曲→『革命』攻撃に失敗しストアに逃げ込んだ分岐のラストの曲）

A2 1. Nima Fakhrara - Hostage（『人質』捜査中の曲） 2. Nima Fakhrara - Now（『鳥の巣』ルパートを追いかける時の曲） 3. Nima Fakhrara - As I See Them（『相棒』捜査中の曲） 4. Nima Fakhrara - Will You Trust Me（『最終任務』ハンクかアラン隊長達と戦う時の曲） 5. Philip Sheppard - Little One（『あらたな我が家』家事をする時の曲） 6. Philip Sheppard - Zlatko（『ズラトコ』ズラトコから逃げる時の曲） 7. Philip Sheppard - Confrontation（『ズラトコ』逃げて裏庭まで来た時の曲） 8. Philip Sheppard - All This Will Pass*（使用シーン特定できず）

*ジャケット中面にはA1-2と同じ「By Firelight」と書いてあったが、実際聴いてみると「All This Will Pass」で、ダブり収録されているわけではなかった。

　マーカスとコナーは『革命』『最終任務』の曲を最後に持ってきて、『行進』『サイバーライフタワー』で〆ていたVol.1と差別化を図ったようだ。カーラの最後「All This Will Pass」は多分削除されたシーンに使う予定だったものじゃないかと思うが、これも結構緊迫した暗めの曲なので、主人公3人ともやや陰鬱なトーンでまとまっている。というか比較的陰鬱にならないプレイリストを組むのに必要そうな曲をVol.1で使い果たしているように見えたので、必然的にこうなると思う。 　全体的に、「Now」や「Zlatko」のような派手な曲もありつつ、「The Junkyard」や「As I See Them」のようなかなりアンビエント寄りの曲も混ざっていて、通しでバランス良く聴ける構成だと感じた。特にマーカスのものは、静かなピアノで始まり最後もピアノで余韻を残す構成になっていて良い。

　次、デトロイト所縁のアーティストによる挿入曲の収録されたB盤は、残念ながら収録時間の都合上いくつかショートVer.に編集されている。あと作中での使用シーンがいくつか特定できなかった。特にショッピングモールのシーンなどはかなり判別しにくかったので、環境音として使われているものは爆音ヘッドフォンで頑張って探すか内部データを見るかしないとキツいかもしれない。

B1 1. Emily Rose - Seven Moons［ショートVer.］（『自由への行進』ショッピングモールBGM） 2. The Whiskey Charmers - Straight and Narrow［ショートVer.］（『相棒』バーの店内BGM） 3. The Britemores - Perfect Day［ショートVer.］（『自由への行進』ショッピングモールBGM） 4. White Shag - Midnight Cry［ショートVer.］（『鳥の巣』ハンクの車） 5. Rocket 455 - Go to Hell（『相棒』ハンクの車） 6. Juan Atkins - Electric Night［ショートVer.］（『ジェリコ』花屋向かいのガレージ付近、『鳥の巣』アパートの廊下）

B2 1. Emily Rose - Boom Goes the Music Box 2. The Whiskey Charmers - C Blues（『相棒』バーの店内BGM） 3. The Whiskey Charmers - Can't Leave（『相棒』バーの店内BGM） 4. Rocket 455 - Johnny Lawless（『ブリッジ』ハンクの車） 5. White Shag - Voices in My Head 6. Juan Atkins - Station（『エデンクラブ』店内BGM）

　デジタルサントラもディスク4が挿入曲集になっていたが、このVol.2レコードではそこからThornetta Davisの2曲だけが収録されていない。ピンポイントなので、収録時間の問題というよりは、分からないが何か権利上の問題でもあったのかもしれない。Thornetta Davisはカーラ編で「Set Me Free」がモーテル受付の場面に、「I'd Rather Be Alone」がジェリコへ向かう車内の場面に、いずれも暗示的かつ効果的に使われていたと思う。この人の曲がないことは少し残念だった。

　また、ひょっとしたら印象に残っているプレイヤーも多そうな、マーカスがおつかい中に聴けるストリートミュージシャンの曲も収録されていない。このSteve Wallisというフォークシンガーはオーストラリア出身だし、ゲーム中の曲も「メルボルン・レイン」を「モータウン・レイン」に替え歌しただけのもので、これに関してはデトロイト（＝モータウン）所縁要素ではないためと考えられる。「Hold On」とか「The Minsky Tapes」がサントラに収録されないのもそういう理屈な気がする。

　レコードに収録されているものもB1はショートVer.が多く、途中でフェードアウトして萎えるので、普通に聴きたいならデジタルサントラか、各アーティストのCDなりレコードなりmp3なりサブスクなり聴いた方がいい。特にThe Whiskey Charmersによる3曲が収録されている1stアルバム『The Whiskey Charmers』は、全体的に気だるくノスタルジックで雰囲気のある良いアルバムだった。バーのシーンでも流れている「Straight and Narrow」という曲は、この歌詞からハンクの人物を造形したのではないか疑ってしまうほどそれっぽいし、ハンクのことが好きな人はもしかしたらこのバンドは合うかもしれない。The Whiskey CharmersはDBHにインスパイアされて「Human」という曲もリリースしていて、曲にトレーラーやゲームの映像を合わせた動画もアップしている。これはなんか歌詞がえらく直接的な感じがしなくもないが、英語がよく分からないので良い曲だなと思った。

　ハンク繋がりでもう一つ。本編中でポータブルプレイヤーで聴いていたバンドを特定してヘヴィメタルの話題になる描写があるために、一部誤解を生んでいるっぽい気配を感じたので書いておくと、車でかけているRocket 455は全然ヘヴィメタルではない。メタル系の特徴として挙げられがちな精密さや複雑さとは対極的に、彼らの曲にはラフで軽快なものが多い。ジャンルとしてはガレージロックとかガレージパンクとかよく紹介されている。また、『鳥の巣』冒頭の車で一瞬だけ聴こえるWhite Shagというバンドも結構明るい感じのサイケデリックロックだった。 　ポータブルプレイヤーで聴けるKnights of the Black Deathは実在しないバンドで、一瞬ヘッドフォンから聴こえる音源はAudio Networkという音楽素材提供サイトのものだった。作中スキャン時の情報には「ダークヘヴィメタル」と書いてあったので、なんかゴシックとかドゥームとかブラックメタルっぽいサウンドで鬱っぽい題材を扱うバンドかもしれない。直接元ネタがあるのかどうかは知らないが、実際ノルウェーにはペスト（黒死病。black death）を名前のモチーフにした1349というバンドがいたりはする。1349もブラストビートをよく使う。

　あとは、B1でもB2でもラストに収録されている比較的大御所のホアン・アトキンス（Juan Atkins）。目立つ形で使われていたのはエデンクラブ店内BGMの「Station」だった。彼がデリック・メイ、ケヴィン・サンダーソンと共に始めたクラブミュージックとしてのテクノは、情報革命を見据えたある種のポジティブな未来志向を持っている。クラフトワーク等のテクノポップの影響を受けつつ、Pファンクの流れから宇宙への憧憬も引き継ぐサウンドで、SFを感じさせる作品が多い。 　そういえばボーナスコンテンツ動画でコナーのサントラ担当のファクララ氏がシンセサイザーを紹介する際「ロボット的な人格を表現するために～」と言っていたが、多分一般に「ロボット的」と言われて想像されるものはああいうどことなく暴力的・物質的なインダストリアル調のニュアンスがあるサウンドではなく、このホアン・アトキンスのテクノみたいな音楽じゃないかと思う。 　ちなみに今回のレコードではアーティスト名がJuan Atkinsという記載になっているが、この2曲はModel 500名義の『Digital Solutions』に収録されている。しかし���アン・アトキンスの曲ってなんとなく思想が前に出る感じだから、同じデトロイトテクノでもケヴィン・サンダーソンなんかの方が享楽性あるように思うが、エデンクラブは割とお上品なのかもしれない。

まとめ

　というわけで、『Detroit: Become Human Original Soundtrack Volume 2』を買わなければ他では聴けないというような曲があるわけでもなし、音質にこだわる人かそうでなくてもレコードを聴くのが好きな人か、もしくは収集癖のある人なら買ってもいいのかもしれない。個人的には青くて綺麗でよかったので、よかったです。

[besedar]

Se opravičujem, ampak mogoče kdo poglobljeno ve, zakaj se reče vitezom in ne vitezem?

Zdaj pa celo vem :D !! Več ali manj in ne preveč poglobljeno, verjetno tudi s kupom napak, vsekakor z ene desetimi vprašaji in podvprašanji. Oprosti, da mi je vzelo ......... pet mesecev in pol ........................ Če karkoli pomaga, ni vprašanje niti za hip zapustilo moje nesrečne glave 😅

Opozarjam, da sem klovn s piškavim lešnikom za betico in da nimam o ničemer pojma.

Torej: preglas je sprememba kvalitete vokala zaradi vokala ali konzonanta nekje v bližini — oziroma: samoglasniki se spremenijo zaradi drugih samoglasnikov ali soglasnikov, ki (ponavadi) samoglasnikom sledijo. Ni nujno, da so ti, ki vplivajo, prilepljeni tik ob vokal, ki ga gledamo, več kot en zlog stran pa tudi ne smejo biti. Načeloma preglas povzročijo j oz. j-jevski glasovi ali pa drugi (sprednji ali zadnji) vokali, ki prvi vokal potegnejo nekako proti sebi. Diagrami!

(Trikotniki kažejo položaj vokalov v ustih)

J naredi enako kot sprednji vokali, ker je podoben i-ju in palatalen.

To se zgodi na primer v nemščini, ko tvoriš množino. Gans (gos) in potem Gänse, ker je bil na koncu namesto e-ja menda nekoč i, ki je zdaj ošibel in ki je takrat a povlekel v e-jevski glas. Takole:

Zdaj pa končno k vitezu! Ta vrsta preglasa je bojda (v indoevropskih jezikih?) načeloma redka, v slovanskih je pa pogosta: element, ki preglas povzroča, namreč stoji spredaj in ni vokaličen, pač pa konzonanten in mora biti palatalen (kolikor vem). Kaj pomeni, da je konzonant palatalen? V teoriji to pomeni, da ga izgovoriš s pomočjo trdega neba, moramo pa potem prišteti še tale citat: "Vse, kar je nastalo v palatalizaciji, je de facto palatalno." Na to me boste vprašali: "okej, ampak zakaj?", na kar lahko odgovorim samo z: "o, glejte tistole tam" in hitrim begom. (Če kdaj izvem, se vrnem in povem, ampak bi znalo biti še dodatnih pet mesecev.)

Za slovanske jezike je še to značilo, da preglas ni samo na naglašenih vokalih, kot je drugače tipično. Vprašanje: kje pa potem se zgodi? Kako veš, kdaj se bo, kdaj pa ne? Odgovor je ... Zaenkrat še ne vem. Upam si zatrditi, da se ne zgodi povsod, mislim tudi, da ni odvisno od tega, a je vokal naglašen ali ne. Od položaja v besedi, recimo samo na koncu? Kaj pa vem. (Ponovno: se še vrnem? Upam?)

Za c, č, š, ž in j se o v slovenščini ponekod preglasi v e.

Pobrskamo po e-učbeniku za slovenščino, ki pravi:

Kar bi pa potem za nazaj osmislilo tisto o de facto palatalnosti, se mi zdi! Če preglas sprožijo palatalni konzonanti in je j je tako ali tako palatalen, c, č, š, ž so pa produkti palatalizacije ... To bi šlo, ne? Saj ne, da bi mi bilo kaj bolj jasno, zakaj bi se npr. š štel za palatalnega, če slučajno pride iz h-ja (? kruh in krušni?), ampak naj zaenkrat bo.

Z pri vitezu torej ni palatalen in na o nima vpliva, tako da vitezov ostane na -ov.

PS: Glede oblike "vitezov" — pridevnik in genetiv plurala sta enaka, ne? Vanda Babič pravi, da je to zato, ker je pridevnik prišel iz "nekaj, kar je od vitezov", torej iz tega genetiva. Luka Repanšek pravi, da ti dve obliki nimata zveze, ker sta si bili zgodovinsko različni in sta potem samo formalno/po obliki sovpadli. Meni se zdi njegova razlaga bolj prepričljiva, ampak to je mogoče tudi zato, ker imam rodbinsko pogojeno nezaupljivost do Babičeve, ki je pa ona tudi z ničimer ne izpodbija.

[darkmaga-returns]

by Larry C. Johnson | Oct 16, 2024

Some of you know how my mind works. When I hear the word, “THAAD,” my brain immediately registers a Porky Pig voice saying, “THAAD’s All Folks.” THAAD is the acronym for Terminal High Altitude Area Defense. It is essentially a large bullet that is supposed to strike an in-bound missile and break it up. It is a kinetic weapon, i.e., it does not explode.

So Israel, who claims (mistakenly) to have the best air-defense system in the world, now wants the THAAD. If you got the best, why do you need something better? Hell, if the THAAD was such a great piece of air defense why didn’t we send a couple to Ukraine? Zelensky is begging for more air defense. The reason is simple — reportedly, there are only nine launchers in the entire world. Each launcher carries eight missiles, which means if Iran fires 100 missiles, 92% of them will be safe from THAAD.

Then there is the reloading and supply problem. Reportedly, Lockheed Martin built only 1,000 missiles for this system. There is not a ready supply sitting around in a warehouse waiting to be sent to the front. Oh yeah, almost forgot. Each missile costs $12.6 million. Not exactly what you would describe as a cheap piece of ammunition. As a tactical and strategic weapon, THAAD is a bust. It is not designed for the battlefield in Ukraine, where Russia can launch 200 missiles in one attack.

What is this really about? I believe it is an excuse to put US troops on the ground in Israel in hopes that it will deter Iran from striking near targets manned by US forces. It also is a tangible gesture of support for Israel by the Biden Administration, who may be playing a desperation card in order to persuade Israel not to attack Iran. From a military standpoint, this is a nothing burger.

I discussed this and other issues related to the genocidal war against the Palestinians and Lebanese with the Judge and Nima today.

[issoimporta]

Chega de fazer for?a para mover seu fog?o/geladeira/m?quina de lavar. O suporte especial para eletrodom?sticos e m?veis em geral veio para facilitar sua vida e n?o precisar mais fazer esfor?o desnecess?rio: -F?cil de usar, ele ? ajust?vel (profundidade e largura) e vai de 40cm at? 69cm de tamanho. -Possui travas e quando precisar mover o eletrodom?stico de lugar ? s? destravar. -A?o Resistente e Refor?ado para suportar qualquer tipo de m?vel ou eletrodom?stico. -F?cil instala??o. -Base Antiderrapante e Anti Vibra??o. -Ajuda proteger eletrodom?stico e m?veis contra a ?gua da limpeza, evitando ferrugem e estrago nas madeiras. ESPECIFICA??ES: - Suporta at? 180 kg - Material: A?o Carbono, Pl?stico e EVA - Cor: Cinza - Dimens?es do produto: M?NIMA (A x P): 3,5 cm x 40 cm M?XIMA (A x P): 3,5 cm x 69 cm - Largura do Produto: 5 cm - Dimens?es da Base (L x P): 5 cm x 7 cm - Peso do Produto: 1,40 kg O QUE VAI NO PACOTE? -02 Carrinhos ajust?veis com freioFicha técnicaCódigo 7358Categoria UtilidadesMarca FLEX

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

A Fresh Start [6]

Din Djarin x F!Reader

Warnings: angst, but with like immediate follow up comfort, medical trauma? if you’ve ever been blown off by a doctor in the office and that frustrated you then be forewarned

Word Count: 5,119

Summary: When  you made plans for your future they never involved being hired by a   Mandalorian to baby-sit his adorable, green gremlin of a child.   However, after your life fell apart in the span of one disastrous  night,  you found it to be the only feasible option you had left.  Nevarro was a  far cry from Coruscant, but the thriving community turned  out to be  exactly what you needed. Every day you spend in Nevarro you  fall more  and more in love with your new life, but when your past rears  its ugly  head you find that perhaps peace wasn’t meant for everyone.

Ch. #06: TRIKAR’LA, BUIR!    

Chapter Summary: Grogu goes to the doctor, and the Marshal decides he might need to murder said doctor. You get comforted by your boys.

 "Watch carefully,

 the magic that occurs,

 when you give a person,

 just enough comfort,

 to be themselves."

 - a t t i c u s

Nevarro didn’t have a large hospital. It had an emergency center and a clinic for routine appointments. Anything that couldn’t be healed or cared for within a day got transported to a nearby settlement on a neighboring world. Luckily, the transport time wasn’t very long, and Nima told you that the travel there wasn’t intense. The High Magistrate had worked out a deal to keep it that way.

Coming from a Level One Trauma Center on Coruscant, the office was shockingly puny. A simple two story building with emergency services on the first floor and routine medical care on the second. You had learned ages ago that the size of a medical center didn’t correlate to the kind of care a patient could receive. Some of the best physicians you’ve worked with came from smaller hospitals. You had no criticism there. The only thing that made you nervous was not having the kind of resources a Level One hospital would have. Coruscant had spoiled you in that sense.

For what had to be the hundredth time since leaving the station, you glanced over at Mando who walked right beside you. He held Grogu in his arms casually chatting with the boy. Grogu responded in a mix of Mando’a, Basic, and gibberish. It was painfully cute watching the Mandalorian interact with his son. Every inch of him screamed danger and intimidation, but the tender voice leaving his helmet’s modulator was nothing but soft and loving.

“Is something wrong?”

It took you a second to realize Mando was talking to you. “Hmm?”

“You keep looking over at me.”

You were getting pretty decent at reading Mando’s body language, and weirdly you could tell the difference between his head tilts. All of that, yet you still had a bad gauge on how far he could see out of his peripherals while wearing the helmet.

“Oh, er,” You scrambled for a response, “No. Nothing. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was just checking on you.”

You opened your mouth but stopped yourself when you realized you were about to apologize for apologizing. Instead, you tried to steer the conversation away from your staring. “Do you know how many doctors work in Nevarro?”

“Not enough.” Mando replied. “Three rotate on the schedule right now, I think. Karga is still trying to recruit more, but until Nevarro really makes a name for itself it’s a hard sell.”

“It’s pretty impressive so far.” You motioned around to the clean and cheerful street surrounding you. “And growing fast.”

Mando nodded and your lips curled up in a smile as you watched him allow Grogu to crawl onto his shoulder and cling to his helmet. He kept one hand up just in case the child slipped. “Yes, but as always, it comes down to credits. Karga spent a lot to get this place built up. Doctors are expensive.”

“True, but if you’re gonna spend credits anywhere healthcare is a good bet.” You shrugged. “There are doctors out there who’ll take less pay to work somewhere rural. I⏤” You stopped yourself and at the sudden halt Mando glanced your way. You had nearly told him you once considered working in a rural setting. It hadn’t crossed your mind in ages, since before the incident, but you didn't think twice before nearly blurting it out. You cleared your throat. “I knew someone. From the clinic I worked in. They were specifically looking for a job somewhere rural.”

Mando nodded. “Maybe you should send their frequency number to Karga.” You forced out an awkward chuckle. “For now though, we have Bacta and cautery. You could probably find e-bacta if you asked the right people.”

“Spoken like a true bounty hunter.” You teased.

Mando let out a laugh and began to wrestle Grogu from the makeshift jungle gym of his shoulders and helmet. The clinic had come into view and you felt a ball of nervous energy begin to form in your chest. This wouldn’t be your first time in a medical facility since that night, but it would be your first time going willingly. All this morning, you hadn’t thought about it. You didn’t think this would bother you at all, but staring at the building now your mouth was becoming dry and your palms clammy.

The weight of a hand on your shoulder startled you, and your head snapped to the side to see Mando facing you. Nothing about his helmet looked concerning, but you could feel the worry radiating from him. “I’ve been calling your name. You didn’t answer.” Grogu hummed in his arms and tilted his head. “Are you sure everything is okay, cyar’ika?”

“Yes. Just...zoned out.” You tried to find an excuse, but nothing was coming to mind. So, you went for the next best thing. Topic change. “What does that word mean?”

“What?”

“The word you called me. Uh, ‘shar ekah’?” You repeated it best you could, but the word was always spoken so swift and softly that it was hard to remember the exact pronunciation. Saying ‘buir’ had been much easier.

Mando’s hand fell from your shoulder and his entire body went tense. You furrowed your eyebrows at his reaction. He let out a soft cough, and now it seemed like he was the one searching for something to say. Your distraction had been successful. However, now you were very curious as to what he was calling you. Mando didn’t seem like the type to secretly be calling you ‘dumbass’ all the time.

“It’s nearly 2.” He blurted. “We don’t want to be late.”

“Right!” You nodded. As curious as you were, you’d happily accept any advancement of this moment. Anything to avoid him asking you what was wrong again. He passed you to enter the building and you took in one last shaky breath before following.

The clinic’s waiting room was filled with children. This office saw patients of all ages, but with school starting up next week it seemed most families were doing exactly as Din was⏤ getting his child ready for day one. The schedule was running late so despite it being nearly half an hour past the appointment time, Din sat in the waiting room right beside you. Grogu had wiggled out of his lap to run around the room with other kids around his age. It made him nervous at first. He wanted his son to have friends to have fun to not ever feel left out, but the anxiety of him not fitting in was painful. You had reassured him that everything was fine, and you had been right. Grogu squealed and laughed as he played with three other kids.

Din was leaning back in his seat, hands clasped over his abdomen and ankles crossed, in an attempt to look as casual as he possibly could. The truth was the opposite. Din couldn’t stop peering out of the corner of his eyes at you. Luckily, the helmet made it a lot easier for him to hide his actions unlike you. Din was still worried about you. It was obvious something was making you uncomfortable, and he had been determined to get to the bottom of it. Until, of course, you innocently asked what ‘cyar’ika’ meant. That had thrown him.

The first time he called you ‘cyar’ika’ it had been entirely accidental. You had been hesitant about asking him questions about himself, and he didn’t want you to feel that way. In his reassurance the word had just slipped out. Since then, it fell out a lot more. Often by choice. Din liked the way it sounded when he was referring to you with it. He liked that every time it left his lips, you’d turn to give him attention with your pretty smile.

Technically, the answer shouldn’t be embarrassing to him. The best translation of ‘cyar’ika’ was ‘darling’ or ‘sweetheart’, but that didn’t necessarily mean it had to be used in a romantic setting alone. It was a generalized term of endearment. He could’ve said that. Din’s problem was that he knew, deep down, he didn’t feel just a ‘generalized endearment’ for you. Din was much too attracted to you to pretend it was said with any other connotation.

His panic hadn’t helped his situation. Din spent his entire life being trained for a fight. He was taught from a young age that panic led to mistakes and mistakes led to death or worse. It had been ingrained into every single cell of his body to the point where staying calm was a muscle memory for him. It didn’t take a conscious decision. It was his default, and that default was half the reason he was so successful as a bounty hunter. Despite all of that, all it took was one innocent look from you⏤ one simple question⏤ and he melted into a pathetic puddle.

Din glanced your way again. You sat ramrod straight in your seat, shoulders tense, and your fingers were tangled together in a vice grip. He wasn’t sure how you weren’t hurting yourself holding your hands together like that. Whereas his entire body sat casual, though a farce, yours screamed stress. His own hands came unclasped as the urge to touch you in reassurance overcame him. Din managed to resist and instead crossed his arms in hopes that this position would better control his instinct.

“I haven’t been to a doctors office in a while.” You blurted. The sound of your voice had his head snap to look at you in a nearly comical speed. You were watching Grogu play while you spoke in a whisper. “I guess I’m just nervous. It’s stupid.”

“How you feel is never stupid.” Din replied. He shifted so he sat up rather than leaned back. “You didn’t have to come with us. If I had known—”

You chuckled, “I know. You wouldn’t have made me. I think you might be a little too understanding for a boss.” Din swallowed the lump that had formed in his throat. That was true. Kriff, if you knew any of the thoughts he had you’d consider him the worst boss in this world— maybe in the entire Outer Rim. “I wanted to be here. For Grogu and— and you.”

“I appreciate that.”

“It’s no big deal.”

Din disagreed. You were acting against an active fear you had for him and his son. That meant a lot to him. He knew the kind of strength it took to press onward into a setting of discomfort.

“Can I ask why?” Din asked. “Why haven’t you been to a clinic in a while?”

You shrugged and your gaze drifted down to your hands which you began to wring together. Din stayed silent. He was content with giving you all the time in the world to respond. Finally, you looked up to meet his gaze. You smiled and your words came out jokingly, “Nobody likes doctors.”

“Still important to go now and then.”

“Uh huh.” You tilted your head at him, smile growing impish. “And when’s the last time you saw a doctor? Mr. Big Bad Bounty Hunter?”

Din’s lips curled up in amusement. He loved that you were comfortable enough to joke with and tease him. He shook his head. “I have bacta and a cautery at home. Those don’t require me to sit in a waiting room for 45 minutes.”

“Fair point.” You chuckled. “Bacta and cautery do have their own faults, you know.”

“Like?” Din asked. He didn’t really care about the faults of either, but if this distracted you from your nerves he’d play along. Plus, the sound of your voice was like music to his ears. He’d sit and listen to you read the instruction manual for a caf machine without complaint.

“Well,” You began, your shoulders beginning to relax, “Bacta is incredible. No doubt. Society called it a medical miracle and they weren’t wrong. It’s only as good as the person using it though. If the wound isn’t cleaned right or debris is left inside when the Bacta is applied then everything gets trapped inside as your tissue heals. Plus, if it’s already an internal issue Bacta can’t target that. It does nothing for fever control or symptom management.” Din could tell you were getting into the conversation because you twisted in your seat to face him. “If you use Bacta on a fracture, but you don’t set it right then it heals wrong. If you mess up the measurements in a Bacta tank or the settings are wrong it can ‘overheal’ a person which just means a person’s tissues and cells rejuvenate and are reborn so fast that it floods the body. Those excess cells wreck havoc and turn to tumors wherever they land.” Din let his eyes shamelessly trace your features. This was the first topic, other than Grogu, that he had seen you get so excited about. You pointed at him with a mocking grin, “And don’t get me started on a cautery gun.”

Din chuckled, “And what exactly is wrong with my cautery gun?”

“You’re essentially creating a wound to fix a different wound.” You scoffed. “It’s great for stemming blood loss and destroying infected tissue, but between infections and scarring⏤”

Din leaned toward you, a confident tilt to his head, “I’ve never had a cautery induced infection.”

“Never?”

“Never.”

You twisted your lips, amused, and he shifted so he was as close to you as he could manage in the separate chairs. You shook your head. “Fine. You, Marshal Mando, are the one exception of the system. Congratulations.”

Din let out a breathy laugh, and he wondered what it would sound like to hear his name spoken in your voice. The beeping of his communicator made you alter your position in the chair so you were back to where you had started. Din did the same and resisted muttering the curse words bouncing around in his head. Looking at the screen he saw it was Cara. Dank farrik. She’d only call if it were actually important.

He accepted the call and Cara started talking without preamble.

“Mando, we got pirates. Mayfeld and I are on our way to the tarmac where a group of them are causing trouble, but Karga said a few were spotted by the school.”

This time he didn’t hold back the curse that came to mind. Din turned to look at you and you gave him a reassuring nod. “Go.”

“I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Din stood.

“We’ll probably still be in here.” You motioned to the waiting room.

Din reached out to squeeze your shoulder and on his way out told Grogu to behave.

Kriffing pirates.

Mando had been an excellent distraction. You had never been a fan of pirates at baseline, they were always the worst to deal with when they stumbled into the hospital in Coruscant, but now you really hated them. You tried to focus on Grogu who was still playing with a different set of kids as the ones he had been with before got called back to be seen. Before they left, you had actually exchanged a few frequency numbers to set up play dates at some point.

“Grogu?” A nurse poked her head out of a door.

He dropped the blocks he was holding to perk up at the sound of his name. Still in a playful and active mood, Grogu wanted to walk on his own rather than be held so you walked by his side as you both followed behind the nurse.

She went about taking vitals and getting some more information before leading you back to a simple room. You sat down in one of the two chairs in the corner, by the exam table, and let Grogu bounce around the room to burn off his excess energy.

“You are gonna sleep so good tonight.” You chuckled.

“No sleep. No.” Grogu chirped. “No, no.”

That was quickly becoming one of the kid’s favorite Basic words to use. You glanced up at the clock on the wall to see it was about an hour after your appointment time. Understaffed clinics got backed up, it happened, and you understood that better than most. You felt bad for the poor physician running around the office today. You were actually hoping you’d have to wait a bit longer though.

Mando wanted to be here for this, to be here for his son, and you hated that the damned pirates got in the way of that. If you could swap roles with him and handle the pirates so he could stay here with his son you would’ve. Unfortunately, that would’ve been messy for every single person involved. You didn’t have an extensive history doing well in a fight, and the only kind of blade you knew how to use was a scalpel. You’d never even held a blaster before.

“Skraan!” Grogu called out.

You shook your head. “We just ate lunch, buddy. I think we have some snacks left.” You dug around the baby bag you had packed for the day and found the container of star shaped cereal puffs you had put together this morning. “Here we go.”

Grogu bounced over to you happily and held his hands up to you. You dropped a few stars into his palms and watched him eat them one by one. He’d explored the room while eating the stars and would only return back to you for more stars. That became the routine for the next ten minutes and by then you were out of star shaped snacks.

A knock at the door startled you. “Come in!” You placed the container into the bag and motioned for Grogu to come sit on your lap. “Hi. I’m⏤”

“This is Grogu?” The man interrupted your introduction. He was older, you’d guess in his late sixties or early seventies, and was human. Thick gray hair covered his head and it matched the thick mustache above his lips.

“Yes. We’re here for⏤”

“Let’s see, school registration check up.” He read off the holopad in his hand. You shifted in your seat, eyebrows furrowed in annoyance, and bit back a snarky reply. “We’ll get some blood for lab work, give the usual booster shots, and get you on your way, yeah?”

You held Grogu’s hands, skeptical, “I was actually hoping⏤”

“There’s no need for⏤”

“Please stop interrupting me.” You snapped. There was nothing you hated more than not being able to get a thought out. Maybe you’d have more patience for it if you hadn’t spent all your training being looked down at for being a young woman. You couldn’t count the number of bloated attendings you worked under who were just like the man in front of you. The doctor stayed silent but you could see annoyance on his features. “Who are you?”

“I’m sorry?”

“When you came in, you never introduced yourself.” You said but paused before saying more. This wasn’t a hospital you had any sort of credentialing in. That meant if you wanted anything done, you were gonna have to stroke an ego. You cleared your throat and shook your head. “Sorry, I’m sure it slipped your mind with how busy you are today. I bet they have you running all over the place.”

The man chuckled. “You aren’t wrong. My name is Dr. Daelar. I am sorry about the wait time. I was caught in a different procedure room for the last hour doing a cryoablation of some skin lesions.” You resisted the urge to scoff. Doing cryoablation correctly took five minutes tops. Doing it insanely, incorrectly could maybe stretch it out to ten. You didn’t appreciate the excuse because you knew it was a lie. “As I was saying, we’ll draw some blood and get those booster shots going.”

“Thank you. We’re actually going to be forgoing the blood tests, and I was hoping you’d take a listen to his lungs.” You replied. Over lunch, Mando had explained that he wasn’t comfortable with anybody drawing blood from Grogu. He hadn’t explained the exact reasoning, but you gathered it was something from their tricky past. Even with your back to him, you could tell the topic made him mildly uncomfortable. “He’s had this night time cough I’ve noticed⏤”

Daelar shook his head. “That’s not wise. I strongly recommend the blood tests.”

“Okay.” You drew the word out. “Thank you, and I appreciate your thoughts on the matter⏤”

“These aren’t my thoughts, these are the facts.” Daelar interrupted again. “Blood work should be checked routinely for chronic illnesses. He needs this done.”

You didn’t know if Grogu could tell that you were in a bad mood, but he began to squirm and whine in your lap. He turned around and pushed up on his tip toes so he could bury his face into the crook of your neck. You scooped him up to hold him closer making the action easier.

“I understand the benefits of routine lab work, and I understand the risks of refusing.” You said as calmly as you could. If this was about legal issues then you’d say the magic words that he could type in his chart and waive all liability off himself. “That being said, we’re still refusing a blood draw today.”

Daelar scoffed and shook his head. “You’re being unreasonable. As a first time mom it’s understandable to be nervous and jittery, but it’s no reason to put your son at risk.”

Oh, you really didn’t like this man. Karga had somehow managed to hire a physician that represented everything wrong with healthcare. Nice. Between the bullying and assumptions, that would be enough to piss you off alone. Add the stress of being in a clinic after so long? You really had no chance of getting out of this without losing your cool.

“You’re not drawing labs on Grogu.” You snapped.

Daelar shook his head and shrugged. “Then I don’t know if I can clear him to start school.”

“Blood work isn’t necessary for school registration. Just the boosters.” Your voice began to raise.

“Ma’am⏤” He began once more but a solid knock at the door interrupted the interaction. A nurse poked her head in one second later and Daelar snapped at her. “We’re busy in here.”

“Sorry, sir. The child’s father is here.”

Daelar smirked at you. “Good. Perhaps, this will settle the matter at hand.”

The nurse slid out of the room and was replaced by Mando. You took in the sight of him, unharmed and unmarred, and a wave of relief washed over you. If dealing with the pirates had led to a fire fight then Mando came away with no obvious injuries. Mando’s helmet tilted just a bit and you could feel his eyes on you in the same way you had looked over him. His shoulders stiffened marginally, his stance still intimidating, and you wondered if your anger was notable. You rubbed Grogu’s back soothingly.

“Oh. Marshal!” Daelar greeted. “I had no idea this was your son. I⏤”

“What’s wrong?” Mando walked over to stand beside you, ignoring Daelar entirely. He rubbed Grogu’s head and let his hand trail from his son’s head to rest on your upper back. The way he stood beside your seat nearly blocked Daelar from your view.

You lifted your chin to stare up at the T-shaped visor. “Dr. Daelar has been adamant about a blood draw despite my very clear refusal.”

Mando turned around and his hands drifted to his hips. Daelar shifted awkwardly from across the room and he let out a cough. The doctor held his hands up with a smile, “No, I think this is simply a misunderstanding.” Your eyes widened, jaw falling open. “The little Mrs," Again with the assumptions, “She misunderstood me is all. I was simply offering my recommendation, but obviously the decision falls to your hands at the end of the day. We can just work on the boosters and finish the paperwork for registration.”

A disbelieving guffaw left your throat at the audacity of this man. Mando glanced over his shoulder down at you, and you took a sharp breath through your nose. Whatever. As long as Grogu got the care he needed. Mando looked back to Daelar.

“Have you listened to my son’s lungs?”

Daelar’s eyes widened. “Hmm? Why?”

“I know Soran would have brought it up. She’s attentive. Was there a misunderstanding about Grogu’s cough?”

“No. Not at all. Sorry.” Daelar sighed. “Bring the little guy over to the exam table.”

Without speaking, Mando held his arms out to take Grogu, and you tried to hand him over. Grogu clung to your shirt, his claws digging into the material, and he buried his face further into your neck. He grumbled, “No.” You shot Mando a look, and he reached out to help detangle Grogu from you. The little boy didn’t give in.

“Grogu.” Mando said firmly. He set a hand on his back. “Come to me, ad’ika.”

“No, no!” Grogu finally lifted his head to look at his father’s visor. He shook his head and you had to lean back to keep his ears from hitting you. Grogu whined, “Trikar’la, buir!”

Despite all the tension, despite the fact that you still only knew very, very basic Mando’a, you gasped with a swell of pride. Unable to bite back the smile you wore, you cooed. “Grogu, that was so good.” You had no idea what he said beyond referring to his father, but his words sounded like it could’ve been a full sentence. Plus, he had said it in front of Daelar, a virtual stranger. “Good job, sweetie.”

You lifted your eyes to Mando, expecting a similar reaction, but his entire frame was tense. Again, his helmet gave no signs of anger, but a seething energy radiated from him. You furrowed your brow in confusion. Grogu went back to hiding his face in the crook of your neck, hugging you, and Mando shifted his hands so one rested on your back and arm.

“Let me help you up.” Mando whispered in a kind tone. “You can sit on the exam table with him.”

“Alright.” You mumbled.

You didn’t need any help standing, but Mando kept his hands on you while you rose and all the way to the exam table. Once you sat down on the sanitation paper, Mando settled beside you. He kept his arm behind you, his hand leaning on the table by your opposite thigh. You turned to look at Mando, and because of his positioning you found yourself dangerously close to his chest. If you leaned forward you could bury your face in the crook of his neck the same way Grogu was doing to you.

His head began to turn to look at you and you quickly focused your gaze forward. Daelar came over with his stethoscope and began to listen to Grogu’s lungs. He did this for a few minutes before pulling back with a nod. Daelar cleared his throat. “I’m hearing a little wheezing. Very mild. I can prescribe a nebulizer treatment at home before he goes to bed. Hold the mask over his face and just let him breathe in the medicine.”

“Thank you.” Mando said, but his tone was more intimidating than grateful.

“I’ll send a nurse in with the boosters and the medicine.” Daelar said before rushing out of the room.

You scoffed, still in disbelief on how that had gone, but when the door closed Mando shifted so he stood directly in front of you. Now he had a hand resting on the table on either side of your thighs. You blinked in surprise at the sudden motion.

“Are you alright?” Mando asked.

You forced a chuckle. “Yeah. I mean, that guy was a total ass, but he wasn’t the first jerk I’ve dealt with. Won’t be the last.” You continued rubbing Grogu’s back, not knowing what else to do with your own hands. “Granted, I could’ve done without the gaslighting, but…” It occurred to you then that Mando hadn’t hesitated to take your side. “Thanks. For having my back, I mean.”

“Always.” Mando replied with ease. He let out a soft sigh. “I’m talking to Karga about this.”

You laughed. “You’re gonna get a doctor fired because he was rude to me?” Mando didn’t reply, but his shrug was highly unconvincing. “It’s fine.”

“He upset you. That’s not fine. Grogu said⏤”

You gasped, “Yeah! What did Grogu say?”

Mando paused before leaning back. “He said you were sad.”

Your eyes widened in surprise, and you glanced down to gently pull Grogu away from your chest to look at him. He stared up at you with concern in his large eyes, and you gave him a smile. “I’m okay.” You gave his head a light scratch and let your fingers trail to give his ear a light, loving tongue. “Thanks for looking out for me, little guy.”

Grogu lifted his hands toward your face so you brought it down toward him. He lightly patted your cheeks and did the same thing he did this morning⏤ pressed his forehead as close to yours as you could get it. Everyone in Nevarro showed different forms of affection to Grogu, he was too cute to not pay attention to, but the most important sign of affection was the way Mando lightly set his forehead to his. You had to assume that in Grogu’s mind, that was an important thing. The fact that he was sharing that bit of love with you was overwhelming. You tried not to linger on the thought too long this morning⏤ not wanting to fall apart⏤ but Mando being here sticking up for you without hesitation only added to the situation.

You felt yourself begin to get choked up and quickly cleared your throat.

“Here. Why don’t you go to your dad?” You held out Grogu, and Mando must have sensed your distress because he took the child with no question. You gave him a broad smile. “I⏤I have to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”

You hopped off the exam table and as you pulled the door open Mando called out. “Are you sure you’re alright, cyar’ika?”

You let a wide smile fill your features, every bit of real, and nodded sincerely, “I am. I promise. I’m⏤ This…” Considering how grateful you felt right now, you owed him as much truth as you could give. You nodded. “This is the best I’ve felt in a really long time.”

Mando nodded once, silent. Grogu lifted a hand and gave you a small wave. You rushed out of the room and made a beeline straight for the bathroom you had passed on the way into the procedure room. Finally away from prying eyes, you leaned against the locked bathroom door and began to trace the scar along your collarbone. Even with your fingers ghosting over the ugly patch of skin, you felt happy⏤ cared for. Maker, you didn’t think you’d actually feel that way ever again.

mando’a translations:

cyar’ika: darling, sweetheart

trikar’la: sad

buir: father

[uswnt5]

Who are the friends? Like Will and Jane?

Nima, his partner and kid (?), Will and Jane and kids, Fran, James, Cody and his gf, Tyler, Lindsey and her brother, a couple Re people, several others that C & T both hugged and talked to.

[poppuppink]

Uh Oh to the Polar Bears

Polar Bears or Ursus maritimus, are a breed of bears that reside in the colder regions of this earth. They are identifiable with their similar features of a bear as well as their white/yellow fur coats covering their bodies. Interestingly enough, these bears have black skin to increase their intake of heat to survive the cold weather.

Though these Apex predators terror the icebergs of the cold continent eating seals, kelp, and other animals, they aren't the greatest dangers when it comes to the predicament our world has come to

Picture: Polar bear lying on an iceberg by Nima Sarikhani 

Due to the rising climate changes in the world as of 2024, the icebergs and glaciers of the cold region are declining rapidly and melting away. These ice islands hold great importance for most wildlife in the Arctic. Mostly due to being their environment, a place for hunting, and the adaptions they've set to be there in the first place.

Climate change increases each year, to the point that it's becoming the greatest factor in the extinction of different animals, especially to Polar Bears.

In this recent indicator researched by the  Food and Agriculture Organization Corporate Statistical Database (FAOSTAT), in the span from 1961 to the recent years of the 2000s, the rising temperatures are at an all-time high. Additionally, ice formation appears at -1.8°C (28.8°F), though with the recent discovery of the researchers of UCL and Copernicus; ECMWF, there is more proof within 2024 holding the now hottest climate weather presently.

So what does that mean for Polar Bears?

Polar bears use the ice regions for a multitude of reasons,

Their homes, the environment they have adapted to

Their prey requires these temperatures and ice regions to survive

In other words, the ice-cold temperature and blocks make up their entire world. Sure, Polar bears could be moved to places such as the Zoo for better accommodation when their homes are at the brink of destruction, but we already know why Zoos are just as disadvantageous as the melting Ice glaciers/ Icebergs.

The most concerning factor zoos are capable of producing is Zoochosis and the overall captivity situation.

An example of Zoochosis is the case of Gus the Polar bear from the Central Park Zoo of NYC,

A picture of Gus (Polar Bear) lying down in his unit, 2011

Gus was a polar bear exhibited at the Central Park Zoo of New York in the 1990s and died in 2013. He was also the first polar bear to be given Prozac after the public noticed signs of "12 hours of pacing" in 2011. Even noted by the zoo keepers who noted his pacing was also the need to swim in figure eights in his habitat, which then resulted in his need for Prozac. Gus was observed to get worse, when his partner, Ida, died in 2011 when he was seen to lose appetite and had difficulty with the digestion process. Researchers concluded that Gus had depression and "Neurotic tendencies" and he was soon placed in an enrichment program to "cheer him up".

Gus is just one of the examples of animals experiencing Zoochosis and living in a place of captivity. His case should be seen as one of the reasons why Zoos aren't always the greatest options for those who cannot be in the wild.

That being said, Polar Bears are endangered as long as the recent temperatures keep rising to destroy their habitats. Let us also note in an article by Brault (2022), that the pandemic has also placed a great dent in Zoo's finances, which requires the need for visitors to keep running. Given that Polar Bears require more than other animals given their nature and habitat, reliance on these companies owning zoos should not be expected to have the best facilities to care for Polar Bears within the given time.

So, What can we do?

With the rise of climate change already taking effect on the habitats of Polar Bears, we are more responsible than ever if the animals of these cold regions are wiped off the face of the Earth.

Sign petitions that correspond to the protection and preservation of Polar Bears and all Arctic animals in general

Do not partake in fast trends that could lead to mass waste production or high carbon footprints and hold people/companies responsible to make a change for the better(fast fashion, purchasing clothes from non-environmental friendly brands, supporting companies who should lessen their carbon footprint)

Boycott companies (Brands such as Shein, Groupon, Coca-cola, Uni-lever, etc.)

Keep learning and keep advocating

It may seem tedious and it will take an awful long time, but time is a valuable asset to consider when the world continues to heat. If you cannot see the problem with climate change on the welfare of animals in general, NASA scientist, Peter Kalmus, Allan Chornack, and co. were reported to be advocating about the drastic need for higher-ups to make a change for climate change with their decisions to reduce its creation. They were seen chained to a JP Morgan Chase Bank urging bystanders and all who witnessed the protests to hear them out.

Peter Kalmus protesting outside the JP Morgan Chase Bank about Climate Change

Sources

[potomacdebateacademy]

October '23 Tournament Results

This past month, our middle and high school students competed at Georgetown, Cal State, Harvard International Council, October Potomac Intramural, USA Forensics Olympiad, University of Michigan, Tim Averill, and the in-person Bronx tournament in New York City!

That being said, we would like to recognize the following individuals for their achievements:

Georgetown Fall Tournament: 

  High School Varsity 

   ⭐Octafinalist: Zayd P. & Preston L.

   ⭐Double Octafinalist: Lucas K. & James C. and Cady W. & Natalie Z. 

  Speaker Awards 

   📣10th: Preston L. 

  Middle School Varsity 

   ⭐Semifinalist: Adelina E. & Neha N. 

   ⭐Octafinalist: Veer P. & Anthony L. 

  Speaker Awards

   📣7th: Veer P. 

   📣9th: Anthony L. 

NYC Invitational Debate & Speech Tournament (Bronx): 

  High School Varsity 

   ⭐Sextos: Carson D. & Dillon M. 

Cal State Fullerton:

  High School Varsity

   🏆 Finalist: Katherine X. & Grace L. (receiving a gold bid to the TOC!!)

   ⭐Quarterfinalist: Sanvi K. & Sahasra G. and Anna J. & Charles L.

   ⭐ Octafinalist: Alisha D. & Ethan M. 

   ⭐ Double Octafinalist: Cady W. & Natalie Z. and Edwin C. & Alex K. 

  Middle School Varsity

   🏆 Finalist: Veer P. & Anthony L. 

   ⭐ Octafinalist: Daven M. & Jonah K. 

  Speaker Awards

   📣3rd: Veer P. 

   📣7th: Anthony L. 

   📣10th: Jonah K. 

Harvard Debate Council International Tournaments:

  High School Varsity

   🏆 Champions: Katherine X. & Grace L.

   ⭐ Quarterfinalist: Rishik S. & Alex Y.

  Speaker Awards

   📣1st: Katherine X.

   📣2nd: Grace L.

   📣9th: Rishik S. 

  Middle School Varsity

    ⭐ Octafinalist: Grace L. & Leo F.  

October 2023 Potomac Intramural

MSV/HSO

   🏆 Co-Champions: Arshia R. & Preeti G. and Rohan K. & Anay K.

   ⭐ Finalist: Mahitha K. & Sky J. and Nima R. & Raj A.

  Speaker Awards

   📣1st: William Y.

   📣2nd: Sky J.

   📣3rd: Nima R.  

   📣4th: Arshia R.  

MSJV/HSN

   🏆 Co-Champions: Peishi Y. & Aarush M. and Daven M. & Gregory S.

   ⭐ Finalist: Larry F. & Amy Y. and Diya C. & Veena Y.

  Speaker Awards

   📣1st: Gregory S. 

   📣2nd: Peishi Y.

   📣3rd: Diya C.  

   📣4th: James B.  

ESN1/MSN1

   🏆 Champions: Rishabh V. & Sujeev S.

   ⭐ Finalist: Avik D. & Pranav K.

  Speaker Awards

   📣1st: Sidharta D. 

   📣2nd: Shriya W. 

   📣3rd: Sujeev S.   

   📣4th: Sanaa V.   

ESJV/MSN2

   🏆 Co-Champions: Mishka C. & Umar B. and Saisahasra A. & Rishaan K.

  ⭐ Finalist: Daksh S. & Remy S. and Andy Z. & Justin L.

  Speaker Awards

   📣1st: Justin L.

   📣2nd: Andy Z. 

   📣3rd: Remy S.   

   📣4th: Umar B.   

Public Speaking

  🏆 1st: Seven L.

  ⭐ 2nd: Deetya G.

  ⭐ 3rd: Pratham S.

  ⭐ 4th: Kyle W.

USA Forensics Olympiad (Oct):

 Open

   🏆 Finalists: Emi M. & James L.

   ⭐ Semifinalist: Ryna C. & Neha N., Veda D. & Ava Y.

   ⭐ Quarterfinalist: Anna W. & Kristine Q., Darshan C. & Abhay H., and Pia P. & Sarvesh S.

  Speaker Awards

   📣2nd: Emi M..

   📣3rd: Sarvesh S. 

   📣8th: Darshan C. 

   📣9th: Neha N.

   📣10th: Kristine Q. 

University of Michigan:

High School Varsity: 

   ⭐ Quarterfinalist: Preston L. & Ishan P.

   ⭐ Double-Octofinalist: Aaron T. & Isabel T.

Speaker Awards

📣2nd: Preston L.

📣7th: Ishan P. 

High School Novice: 

   ⭐ Octofinalist: Grace L. & Samarth S.  

Speaker Awards

📣7th: Anthony L.

📣10th: Veer P.

Tim Averill:

 High School Varsity: 

   🏆 Champions: Katherine X. & Grace L. (receiving a gold bid to the TOC!!)

   ⭐ Octofinalist: Paul W. & Ethan M.

  Speaker Awards

   📣9th: Paul W.