#c: Nicolo Di Genova

[immortalmuses]

ㅤㅤㅤ"…ah. I see my heart is turning himself into a prune."

ㅤㅤㅤNicky's mouth twitched at the corner, a small thing, but he otherwise didn't move. The immortal reclined in a massive sunken tub, his eyes closed and head tipped back against the rockface it was built into. He and Joe were in South Africa for the moment, laying low in a cottage somewhere outside Touws River, and Nicolò had decided there was no better opportunity to indulge…

ㅤㅤㅤ"Will you love me even if I am all wrinkly?" He murmured, slow and quiet in the peace of the bathroom. The water was hot. Hot enough that sweat gathered in the hair at his temples, every muscle in the Genoan's shoulders unraveled like loose yarn, leaving him to feel indolent and sensual and needy. He thought, passingly, that he'd quite like Yusuf to join him. But as the silence stretched between them, Nicky opened his eyes, making a querying noise.

ㅤㅤㅤJoe was there (of course, always), leant against the edge of the sink. His expression was open and stricken in a way that spoke to Nicolò without words, that his beloved's emotions had become too immense for his body. The other immortal inhaled sharply, eyes gone liquid-soft, "…If… when… your beautiful body becomes marked by the proof of our many years together, habibi…" He said, beautiful and hoarse, "…then I will love every wrinkle, every line scrawled across your blessed skin."

ㅤㅤㅤAnd, oh. Yes. Okay. For a moment Nicky's throat closed, taken by the bittersweet image Joe painted with his words. Wordlessly, he lifted his arms from the water and reached towards his love, beckoning.

ㅤㅤㅤAnd Yusuf came into his arms, as he always does. As he always will.

[moxiebustion]

Cursed Old Guard fic idea:

Yusuf ibn Ibrahim ibn Mohammed al-Kaysani.

Died: First Crusades, Ramadan 492, c. 1099

Born: Hijiri Reckoning Safar 473, Gregorian Reckoning 1080

Age: 19

Nicolo di Genova.

Died: First Crusade, Year of Our Lord 1099, July

Born: Gregorian Reckoning, December, Year of our Lord 1082

Age: 16

Notes:

Joe was travelling with his uncle, apprenticed in the family trade, when Jerusalem falls. Joe stays because he's young and hot headed and up for a little derring-do. He very quickly learns a valuable and painful lesson about how wars are.

Nicky gets dragged along with his pious and tyrannical father on the People's Crusade after di Genova Senior loses his wife and he essentially goes off the deep end, which meant Nicky spent about three years on the road and starving for most of it as their ill-quipped band of zealots learn very hard lessons about the effectiveness of prayer as it pertains to things like logistics and supply lines

Joe's beloved uncle is slaughtered. Nicky kind of lost his father to his grief first but he was also killed by the defenders, so both of them hate each other the way only grieving teenagers can hate

It takes them a long time to realize they can't die. Like an astonishing ridiculous level of self-delusion, because young men always think they're immortal anyway

They end up travelling together, although bloodshed ensues for Quite Some Time, because Joe's an impetuous hothead and Nicky's a self-righteous zealot and they're both grieving and don't want to admit it

Teenage Hormones Get Them In The End

Nicky's goddamn lucky he hit an early growth spurt or he'd be in high school until the end of time. As it stands, the very second legal minimum drinking age was established in public houses, he got carded and this trend has continued non-stop to this day

Joe can actually grow a full beard. He lords this over Nicky, who can barely manage one if he puts a lot of effort and time into it (he still gets carded)

Bad Guys are Extremely Weirded Out by this Childhood Sweetheart Teenage Murder Couple

Meanwhile, Andy and Quynh find out that their baby immortals are Actual Babies

Centuries of teenage horniness and melodrama are to come.

Quynh cackles. Andy weeps.

[ungodly-amounts-of-godly-trauma]

major bracket masterpost

four groups will meet on the final stage to see who makes it to the finals… and lastly… who wins

matchups were randomized and placement in the major bracket was based on my own research (i.e. search the fandom name on tumblr and gauge popularity). i tried my best, but if yall have any issues let me know and i'll see what i can do

view them on the website HERE. below the cut is the list of all the matches. the links will be updated as polls go along

group a:

team greek mythology vs. team percy jackson

gabriel vs. chosen one

quasimodo vs. volo

anders vs. team mechanisms

team cookie run vs. orel

jack kennedy vs. kristen applebees

team tma vs. team apotheosis

team awakening vs. akito sohma

group b:

midnight mass vs. team charlie pc

beverly toegold vs. raven

zagreus vs. team tgcf

team real life vs. scp-096

matthias helvar vs. team genshin

seven brothers vs. salem

stanford pines vs. catra and adora

team three houses vs. team free will

group c:

team warrior cats vs. team steven universe

town of hatchetfield vs. holy quintet

jark harkness vs. team we know the devil

hollow knight vs. hyness

sister carpenter vs. team botw

outsider vs. five pebbles

lloyd garmadon vs. all the boiling isles especially hunter

edward and alphonse elric vs. casey jones jr

group d:

yuna vs. arthur lester

niko vs. team mistborn

team trigun vs. team traumageddon

kfc dreemurrs vs. team princess

aziraphale and crowley vs. marble hornet

nicolo di genova vs. team bible

team critical vs. norman minecraft

vector vs. yoo joonghyuk and kim dokja

[voidstilesplease]

absolutely no one cares, but i'mma burst if I don't scream this to the void that is the internet.

ya amar. "ya amar" is doing to me now what "philtatos" did the first time I read the song of achilles: wrecking my body and soul. i shamelessly dove headfirst into the trap that is the yusuf/nicolo tag on ao3, for what? for purely selfish reasons, and now. now it's given me ya amar.

i have gone through only a few fics since, but from the first time ya amar appeared in a fic, and every time after that, i've been taken over. something weird catches in my throat? my chest does the clenchy thingy and i'm overall just- astounded? dumbstruck? awestruck? thunderstruck (moonstruck? lol)? idk but it's something inexplicably good and painful.

i have yet to finish the series (skimmed a bit of the first, flew through the second ~surprisingly, waiting for the third), but joe's endearments to nicky that I can recall are "babe" and "my heart". now, those are great endearments. i particularly have an attachment to babe. but if Joe ever, even just once, in the comics or in the movie - a short puff of air, a whisper, a barely-there line - called Nicky "ya amar", without an ounce of exaggeration, i would embarrass myself.

ya amar, my moon... it's ridiculous how strong this phrase is affecting me. habibi is good too, but ya amar... it feels so... unconditional. i don't even know what the word i'm looking for is. just that it's something someone who has loved the same person for over nine hundred years would utter and mean from the height and depth and breadth of their being. joe's technically already done it when he declared "that man is the moon when I am lost in darkness" in the famous van scene. but that man is the moon and my moon? therein the distinction lies my demise.

*swoons*

[immortalmuses]

I am never going to recover from the image of Nicolò "suffering is my middle name" DiGenova standing in the background, reading Medieval History for Dummies while eating a whole-ass raw Onion!

several people suggested the old guard and fettuccine the cat and then I saw this old tweet and this just happened

[immortalmuses]

The Summer Olympics are here once again, so I am once again thinking about The Old Guard Summer Olympics AUs

Nicky in multi-event sharpshooting, including 50 meter rifle three position, 10 meter air rifle, and 25 meter rapid fire pistol

Quynh in Women's and Mixed individual Recurve Archery, 70 meters

Andromache in (yup, you guessed it) the Equestrian sport of Three Day Eventing, individual and team. She fucking hates the Dressage phase (don't blame me, I'm an eventer too), but she's also got the steadiest hands and the quietest seat in the sport, so good luck getting a lower score.

Joe in.... Football? Rugby Sevens? Maybe Fencing? the Man is too multi-talented, I am open to ideas.

Booker is another likely candidate for Football. Or, interestingly, Handball? Apparently France is like the four-time European champions of Handball. 🤷‍♂️

Nile is another multi-talent, but since Team America is known to dominate in Athletics (344 gold medals!), let's consider her for 110 or 400 meter hurdles, pole vault, maybe high jump? Anyway she's a badass, she could do the Decathlon and make it look like a walk in the park.

Obviously they are all great friends that get up to a variety of shenanigans in the Olympic Villages (of which they do not all belong to the same ones, because who puts Equestrians with Sharpshooters and expects the place not to burn down?). There's shit-talking, romance, broken carbboard beds, you get the idea....

PLEASE SEND YOUR THOUGHTS SO I CAN WRITE SOMETHING

[butw0rldenough]

— Song of Solomon

[tinasturner]

and while you sleep, i'll be scared, so by the time you wake, i'll be brave. — mitski, “i will”

[ ID: Four gifs of Joe and Nicky from The Old Guard. First gif is of Joe and Nicky in the lab, restrained by armed guards. They bump foreheads together. Caption: quote So stay with me endquote. Second gif is Joe and Nicky spooning, asleep. Caption: quote hold my hand endquote. Third gif is Joe and Nicky in Merrick’s lab, strapped to chairs. Nicky looks over at Joe, then the shot changes to Joe finding Nicky’s eyes. Caption: quote there’s no need endquote. Fourth gif: Joe and Nicky lying in bed. Nicky is looking forward, Joe is half asleep and places a hand on Nicky’s hip. Caption: quote to be brave endquote. End ID. ]

[immortalmuses]

@leschanceux

i had to get that damn eyeliner out of my system

[faded-florals]

[fereldenturnip]

Long-haired!Nicky doodles (~18th c) because he’s got that lovely dark, thick Italian hair that makes his husband go nuts. 

Andy banned him from growing his hair out after the 15th time Joe+Nicky showed up “late” to a mission 

[ungodly-amounts-of-godly-trauma]

major bracket masterpost

after the first round, the crowd has begun to thin... who will make it to the next around and, most importantly, the final stage?

a solemn moment of silence for all those who have been sacrificed... also a moment of silence for team locked tomb, who should have been there, except i kind of fucked up. matches and links below the cut!

group a:

team percy jackson vs. gabriel

quasimodo vs. anders

orel vs. kristen applebees

team be not afraid vs. team awakening

group b:

team charlie pc vs. raven

zagreus vs. team real life

matthias helvar vs. seven brothers

team lets go lesbians vs. team free will

group c:

team warrior cats vs. town of hatchetfield

jack harkness vs. hollow knight

team botw vs. five pebbles

all the boiling isles especially hunter vs. edward and alphonse elric

group d:

arthur lester vs. niko

four gays in a trenchcoat vs. kfc dreemurrs

aziraphale and crowley vs. nicolo di genova

team critical vs. yoo joonghyuk and kim dokja

[immortalmuses]

THE TAGS MAKE IT EVEN BETTER

#tog#the old guard#siggy draws#quynh#nicolo di genova#the old gays#genuinely they're all i can think about this week#what are they running from / shooting at?? idk they probably fucked up sdfghfds#the headcanon is: when you put these two together they have a lot of fun but they're a DISASTER.#here's a story: some rich man saw quynh and immediately decided she was going to be his wife#and ofc quynh had issues with this and wanted to smack the shit out of this guy right away.#which she did. which escalated into a duel of sorts. nicolo is just there on the side like 'oh shit'.#either quynh was in disguise or she was forced to wear the dress. either way she is Not happy about it.#cue little brother who can lift his own weight and sprint to the rescue#maybe i should make this into a fic omg#can you fucking tell i started this by listening to anime osts ended it with disney songs

Thinking about the sniper duo

[theworld-is-out-there]

I love how in almost all the TOG fics set before Joe and Nicky meet up with Andy and Quynh, Joe is the calm, rational one, whereas Nicky's default mode is just “COME AT ME, BRO”.

Like, Joe will be getting them food or something from the market, telling Nicky to just lie low; but Nicky sees something he doesn’t like and starts throwing hands.

[therenegadesexualmystic]

Ok where are my somatic healing peeps who are also tog fans?

I joked somewhere that I prescribe semiweekly EMDR sessions for all of them forever. But now I’m wondering if they do in fact have what we would consider PTSD.

Part of the foundations of my work with my clients is that the body stores events in different places. And that part of the body’s purpose is to process the events of our lives. So imagine what their bodies are carrying with all their deaths?

BUT and I know I’m probably missing some brain science here, my understanding that part of PTSD is caused by very real physiological changes in our brains that occur during the traumatic incident. (And CPTSD has as a component the survivors belief that they cannot escape the trauma so if the rest of them have PTSD then Booker definitely has CPTSD & Andy probably does too). Soooo when they heal after a death, does that mean that their brain heals the changes that the trauma caused to the brain? Could they have PTSD that *solely* exists in the body?

What about Booker’s secondary trauma of dreaming of Quynh every night for almost 200 years (or would that be primary trauma cuz don’t they dream it from Quynh’s POV?)? Does his brain have trauma that then gets corrected the next time he dies until he goes to sleep?

Should they all become certified EMDR practitioners so they can do EMDR for each other? Or maybe they should all learn EFT? What about sensorimotor therapy? TRE?

And what would be the best Somatic Therapy for Quynh? I don’t think “Waking The Tiger” is gonna cut it.

What do you think?

[aphroditestummyrolls]

Hi I’m writing a fluffy oneshot about freckles BECAUSE IM FREAKING OUT