#butttt i’m finally getting back into writing and I’m super excited to write all the ideas i have planned

[kaidabakugou]

going to be a little inactive today, going to celebrate my mom’s birthday but i’ll be back soon, xx ☺️🫶🏽

[licorice-tea]

I’m A Ghost Of You, You’re A Ghost Of Me Pt. 3

Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x reader

Content: slow burn relationship, fluff, some platonic Usopp and reader, mentions of weapons, strawhat!reader

Word Count: 1.4k

A/N: sigh i kind of struggled with this part, idk why but i just didn’t feel super proud of the writing? butttt i really enjoyed the ending bit, so hopefully you do too! there might be some edits made later, and i think there will be around 2 more parts after this? anyway, lmk what you think! <3

Part 2 • Part 4

Nami proposes a plan to split up in pairs and look for the swordsman, so as to cover more ground faster without the risk of running into trouble alone. You admire her ability to think ahead and prepare for any possibility- it’s something you, as a child of nobility with a more comfortable upbringing, never really developed.

Everyone sort of pairs off, and you decide to follow Usopp. You enjoy his humor and get to know him as the two of you search for Zoro. This leases you to learn that he’s an inventor, something of a demolitions expert, and he left his home to become a brave warrior of the sea, all of which you find admirable.

After a while of wandering around the island, you and Usopp come to a steep incline. It’s a natural hill, but you notice that if you were to walk around the base to the other side, you’d find a set of stairs. He wants to go around and use said stairs, but you’re sure you’d be able to make it to the top faster by simply hiking up. So with the promise of meeting at the top, you get to hiking the steep hill, and he runs off to climb the stairs instead. As someone who has gotten used to scaling walls as a method of escaping in order to run off in the past… this is an easy feat to you.

And sure enough, you reach the top of the hill in less than 3 minutes or so. It’s a lovely sight to take in; covered in grass and a few patches of flowers and other flora, as well as-

“It’s you!” You’re so excited to see the man before you that you call out to him before you’ve even crossed the expanse of the hill to meet him.

He turns to look at you, “It’s… Damn, you look different.”

“Do I?” You look down at the clothes you’re wearing, not quite so “let me try to blend in with the civilians of this island in hopes I’m not caught by marines and brought back home” anymore. Instead, your outfit fits your personality and taste- it’s much less dull, so you can see what he means. Also, you’ve changed your hairstyle a little. In short, everything about you just seems more fitting, rather than having the feel of someone who isn’t yet sure of themselves like you had a year ago. You spin as if to further show off these changes and agree with a smile, “Hm, I guess so.”

There it is again- your smile. Zoro has held on to the memory of you as best as he could, not that you were ever easy to forget, but images in his mind are nothing compared to the real thing.

When he doesn’t respond, seemingly lost in thought, you go on; “I’m happy to see you again-“

“You are?” Then he coughs awkwardly, realizing he sounds all too eager for his disciplined and focused persona.

You laugh- “Yeah, I never got the chance to repay you.”

“Repay me?” Zoro scoffs, “For what?”

A soft smile graces your features; “For letting me go.”

He shakes his head and looks down for a moment, as if thinking. “You don’t owe me anything.”

“Hah!” As if you’d let such a life changing action go. No; you had good enough manners to know favors should be returned. “Well, at least let me introduce myself properly this time,” you extend a hand to shake his, “I’m y/n.”

Zoro smirks and shakes your hand- his grip is tight, but not uncomfortable. “Roronoa Zoro.”

Usopp finally catches up with the two of you, and all three of you begin heading back toward the docks to meet the others. After a while, the swordsman speaks up.

“So, how much convincing did it take for Luffy to get you to join?”

“Not much. I’ve kind of just been doing my own thing for a year now so… I’m excited to be a part of something.”

“You should’ve seen them Zoro!” Usopp move in between you two and slings an arm around both of your shoulders. “We found them in a bar, and then a marine challenged them to a duel and we were all like GASP!” You giggle at his exaggerated storytelling, and he continues; “Then Luffy was like ‘I bet you could beat him!’ so they were just like ‘sure, why not!’ And we all went outside and it was like a Western showdown- The marine drew his gun and the mighty archer, y/n, drew their bow…”

By the time Usopp is finished explaining how you came to be a part of the crew, the dock is in sight along with the rest of the Straw Hats. “And at last, they knocked back their arrow and- BAM! The arrow bent his gun out of shape! Can you believe it Zoro?”

He shrugs, “Well is that what happened?”

When you realize the question is directed at you, you smile sheepishly. “Uh… Sure! pretty much, at least.”

Once the three of you reach the dock, all seven board the ship. Luffy is overjoyed to have his crew assembled to take on the Grand Line, so Sanji cooks a huge meal for all of you to enjoy. Eventually all the plates are cleaned and cleared, and the clouds in the sky are overtaken by night stars.

“I can take watch for the night.” You offer to your new crewmates, but Nami says that Zoro probably is already. So, you decide to join him when she shows you to the crow’s nest. Before entering, you knock on the wooden trapdoor, then open it up.

Zoro sees the top of your head and offers a hand to help pull you up into the crow’s nest, which you thank him for.

“No problem.”

For a while you simply watch the sea, which is very calm tonight. It leads you to thinking of another night where the sea was calm and the stars bright. The same night you met Zoro when he came to deliver you back to your parents- but even then you’d been too confident (in both his kindness and your own skills) to feel scared. You just get good vibes from him- like he makes you feel safe. So you look over at him, but find that he’s already looking at you. He smiles and you return the smile, albeit a little softer and overwhelmingly endeared-looking. Finally, you break the silence

“So… from a pirate hunter to a pirate- how did that happen?”

Zoro shrugs, “Luffy’s a good captain. I wouldn’t just join any crew, ya know.”

“Hm, same here.”

“Now, nobility to a pirate is a much bigger change, if you ask me.”

“Ah,” you give him a sarcastically sweet smile, “I didn’t.”

This causes Zoro to bark out a laugh. It’s the first time you’ve seen him laugh, you realize, and you’re hooked. He looks so much less imposing like this; full of joy instead of his usual, very focused demeanor. You find yourself giggling as well.

“Tell me, y/n, did you really put a dent in a gun with some flimsy arrow?”

“Like I said, I’m pretty good.”

“I’d like to see for myself.”

“I’m sure you will, eventually.” He huffs through his nose, and you continue, “I haven’t seen you using any of your three swords, either.”

“You will. Eventually.”

You accept Zoro’s statement with a nod. “I don’t think I ever thanked you, properly-“

“You don’t owe me, y/n.”

“I know, you keep saying that, but- you changed my life!” He whips his head around to look at you again, and you continue, “I mean it; I wouldn’t be a part of this crew… hell, I wouldn’t be anywhere but back in my room if it weren’t for you.”

Zoro maintains eye contact for a moment, then gives you an offer you can’t refuse. “Alright, you can buy me a drink at the next island we stop on.”

This makes your cheeks feel warm, though you try not to let the shock be too evident in your features. He must pick up on it through your silence anyway. “What? You wanna repay me, right?”

You nod, “Mhm.”

“So, it’s a date. Go get some rest, I’ve got this covered.”

That night, you try not to giggle and kick your feet too loudly for the sake of your crewmates who are fast asleep. It’s hard though, when your already massive crush is being egged on- and by the crush in question!

Now you just have to make it into the Grand Line and stay alive long enough to go on that date.

[msublake]

HELLO EVERYONE !  ♥ i’m faye ( she/her ) and this is my little fireball blake jung. it feels like i have been waiting forever to join ( literally have been wanting to since the first week mokseong opened ), so i am super excited to finally be able to bring her here! she’s a  💦 suseong  💦 sophomore majoring in pre law and minoring in creative writing. known for her short-fuse cute face, she’s honestly just trying to live her best life at mokseong. sadly, i have been slacking and failed to get her full profile up by her acceptance. however, i do have her STUDENT PROFILE up that has a a little bit of information! i do plan on finishing up her main profile soon and getting some open plots up, but in the meantime you can take a peak under the read more to learn more about miss blake and contact me for plotting either here, on twitter (foxglves), discord (𝙁𝘼𝙔𝙀.#7009)

/ * BACKSTORY * \

tw: mentions of adoption, divorce, self-loathing, bullying.

CLICK HERE FOR A MORE DEEP DIVE INTO HER PAST !

okay so i’m going to try and keep this short. story starts in COUPEVILLE, WASHINGTON where her father, ERIC JUNG, is born and raised. he’s an outcast cause he’s a lil quirky but he befriends another little boy who is also socially excluded. turns out this little boy is a wizard yayyyyy and this absolutely fascinating to her father. basically this is what starts his obsession with magic.

fast forwards a few years and he marries a nice lady named MICHELLE. she’s a lot more quiet and reserved than he is, but they think they’re the perfect pair. she’s a mortician and he’s a writer for the newspaper, but also runs a blog where he rants and raves about magic. a mortician and the local weirdo who is obsessed with magic? needless to say, they quickly became notorious in their town.

after years of being unable to conceive, the couple adopt a baby girl who they name JUNG BARAM, but she just goes by BLAKE. as their only child, she is the apple of their eye. they think she is so smart, so sweet, so special, and come to find out they’re not exactly wrong. 

she’s SIX when she presents magical abilities. she gets inspired by the fairy godmother from cinderella and suddenly all her clothes start flying around her room as she sings   bibbidi bobbidi boo! 

her mother is shook but her father is like  👀👀👀👀

now that they know she’s a wizard, her father is so obsessed with her. like to an unhealthy level. she’s not allowed to play with other children without supervision, can’t go out anywhere with her dad without him trying to get her to do something crazy. blake is now the topic of his blog continuously, which earns her teasing from her classmates. 

now she hates the magic that once made her feel special because she’s getting bullied for it and her dad is an obsessed weirdo. her parents also divorce when she’s EIGHT YEARS OLD because her mother can’t handle the person her father has become. 

her mother easily wins custody of blake and the two move to SEATTLE to start over. while her mother did want a life free of bullying and judgmental eyes, she also brought them to seattle in hopes of finding someone who could understand blake. her mother didn’t exactly hate her daughter, she still loved her, but she feared what she could not control. 

the search brought them to @msuastrid​ ‘s family where blake would grow to love and appreciate herself a bit more. while her faith hadn’t been completely restored, the family taught her to value her magic and this was a huge inspiration to her. 

enrolls in ILVERMORNY when it’s about that time and she thrives there. she loved exploring her capabilities and found her inspiration to be a wizarding lawyer here ( idk maybe saw some important lawyer woman and she got Inspired ).

most of her adult personality developed there

now comes her entrance to MOKSEONG in 2019. chose the school to get away and hopefully start a successful life. she wants to find a sense of belonging here and just basically live her best life tbh

/ * EXTRAS & PLOT IDEAS MAYBE? * \

personality wise she is firecracker. definitely a bit quirky like her father and has loads of energy. even when she’s angry she’s smiling!! which is admittedly a bit scary

on the top of anger, blake here has quite the temper. while she’s overall easy to get along with, she’s easy to anger although she quickly gets over it. this paired with impatience is never good. 

very kind, would give you the shirt off her back.

LOATHES bullying of any kind. if she catches you just teasing your friend out of love, be careful she may cause a scene if she even thinks there’s any malice.

acts like she’s so confident in her abilities and every aspect of her life, but in reality she has a lot of self-loathing. fears failure so much she studies her ass off and sacrifices a lot of sleep. but this in turn actually makes her pretty smart so 🤘🤘🤘

( she may do your homework if you ask and compensate kindly wink wink )

also doesn’t talk about her parents really. she’s lowkey still embarrassed of her dad so if you ever catch wind of that situation, do not bring it up.

party animal then, party animal now

will try anything once HONESTLY

very chaotic. she exhausts me

fellow ilvermorny alumns???? lets goooooo

was a more popular girl, either by association with @msuastrid​ or just her personality tbh she was a pretty girl with a wild streak and attracted all sorts of people. very much a social butterfly. 

on the topic of ilvermorny, she was kind of notorious for having bad taste in men/women. so hey you got a muse that could be labeled as a shitty ex??? let’s fucking go. she probably wasn’t the best partner either tbh

longs for a sense of belonging so she has a bunchhhhh of acquaintances. really wants close friends she could call her family ya know?

also she’s a waitress at borealis bar so gimme regulars and irritating drunks/flirts!! or the sad ones she can comfort

SPECIFIC WANTED CONNECTION: when she entered mokseong, she wanted to start over and get rid of any reputations she had at ilvermorny. butttt she kind of messed that up when she dated a specific someone her freshman year (2019) and it didn’t end well ( per usual ). so gimme a “shitty” ex from last year please!!! can be further discussed

after that breakup, she decided to focus on her studies bc f that

also has a good social media presence,,, i’ll be working on her accounts later

maybe some cousin plots???? people from her hometown??? old bullies??? 

a freshman she’s taken under her wing because “i’ve always wanted a younger sibling!!”

also “our cats have great chemistry, they’re married now”

okay that’s enough

i love you all  🥺

[apple-ships]

1, 3, 5, 26, and 34 for Neon J?🥰 - Temporaryselfshippingblogname

OH HEY LOOK IT’S MY CURRENT FIXATION- Thanks for the ask!! :> @temporaryselfshippingblogname

1. How did you two meet?

haHA I’ve been trying to get my story straight on this one for a few weeks but I finally got it down, I could go off about backstory stuff for hours so get ready for kind of a long one-

So Emmy’s sister (Jasmine) is a HUGE 1010 fan, like the obsessive writes fanfics and reads all the articles and watches every concert and participates in shipping wars kind of fan. And through a deal she manages to get a backstage pass to take a tour of the 1010 limo!! BUT she gets really sick a couple days before the concert and she BEGS Emmy to go in her place and get pictures and autographs and stuff, and Emmy could never say no to her little sister so of course she does it. Now Emmy doesn’t like or support NSR, being an indie singer and actor herself. NSR has been keeping her out of a decent job for most of her life and she’s got a little bit of pent up bitterness. She likes some of the big artists (she has a big soft spot for Sayu and she thinks Eve is cool), but she thinks 1010 is fangirl bait, not real music, etc. etc. She goes to this concert with super low expectations BUTTTT their moves are pretty cool and the music is better than she thought it’d be and she can definitely see the appeal, even if she’s outside the 1010-stan demographic. So she’s reluctantly like “ugh i GUESS they’re fine,” and she’s a little more excited to do the tour. And she goes into the limo expecting it to be some hellish sparkly mess, but there’s a lot of cool info about how the band members were created and how they evolved and there’s a HUGE navy motif that she somehow didn’t catch with the big ass battleship and she ends up having a good time. BUTTTT here’s where the self indulgent mary sue oc stuff comes in- remember how Emmy was a singer/actor in this universe? Turns out the 1010 robots have a lot of free time with not having to eat and sleep and all that, and Haym (the yellow one, I know the names aren’t canon but I like them) has watched all her movies and follows her singing career and is a pretty big fan of hers. SOOOOO he’s like “dad oh my god we can’t just let her leave I need to talk to her” and Neon loves his sons so he agrees to pull her back after the others leave. And Emmy’s standing there alone with six 7ft tall robots like “oh god is this how I die, is this because I said I wasn’t a huge fan” but they give her an exclusive pass to visit the mansion later???? She’s super suspicious but she’s like “okay...... as long as my sister can come...”

And THENNNNN time skip to that mansion visit where she gets to spend time with them and get to know Neon and his sons and she listens to him talk about war stuff and toy making stuff and robot making stuff and it’s four hours later and it’s 5 hours later and she wants to stay and listen forever

UHHH YEAH THAT WAS LONG, TLDR THEY MET AT A CONCERT

3. What do the people around you think of your relationship?

They keep it secret for a pretty long time because of conflicting work stuff, if Emmy told people that she was dating a big NSR artist they’d be like “WHY ARE YOU KISSING THE ENEMY???” and if Neon told people he was dating an indie artist they’d be like “why are you kissing a simpleton???” and it would be bad news all around >.< Jasmine is super supportive though! And once NSR gets reformed everyone is pretty supportive :>

5. Have you given your ship a name?

Oooohhh I haven’t... I’m not great with ship names, my few ships that have names are because people made them for me hehe

26. What was your first kiss like?

klsdjfKLJSDF UHHHHH hi I’m soft and shy and it’s hard for me to write gushy stuff but- I just messed with my Ship LoreTM so I need to go back and rework this one, because ORIGINALLY they got together shortly after bunk bed junction pounded 1010′s asses to the concrete but now I kind of want it to be before that. So I’ll say the old version- when Emmy was helping Neon and 1010 recover from getting their asses pounded to the concrete, she let some comment slip like “I wanna support bunk bed junction but I can’t choose between my ideals and my family” and he’s like “we’re your What.” and Emmy’s like “UHHHH NOTHING???” But he presses on it later on and Emmy says “UGH yeah sorry I shouldn’t have said that, it’s just that the boys are like sons to me at this point, you know?” And he’s like “Then what am I to you?” and she’s like “UHHHHHHHH SOMEONE I CARE ABOUT A LOT?” and it turns out that he feels the same way AAAAAA so uHHHHHHH

34. Who confessed first?

HMMMMMM so I’m still in the process of reworking stuff but.... neither of them are really the type that’d confess first heHE so it’d be a lot of side glances and pent up feelings for a long time.. something like what I talked about above would have to push them into it, and then it’d probably be Emmy that confesses first!

HAHA UHHHHH THAT WHOLE THING WAS SUPER LONG TLDR I AM VERY IN LOVE RIGHT NOW AND IF YOU ASK ABOUT ANYTHING NEON RELATED I’M GOING TO RESPOND WITH A NOVEL

[oopsiedoopsie23]

Update: currently not writing (sorry huns)

Heyyyy, so a while back during the summer I was posting a lot on here butttt I ended up by accidentally deleting my account (and all of my posts), and I gave up on attempting to re-write everything. But, I decided that since the world is going through a rough patch right now, and everyone seems to need all of the positivity and inspiration that they can, I’m coming back!

But, things are going to be a bit different this time around. My interests have changed a bit since the summer and they probably will continue to change as I’m writing so pls respect that <3

I’m also currently doing online schooling right now, and though that does provide me with a lot more flexibility and freedom to write more it does mean that I won’t have a regular schedule, and some weeks I might post almost everyday and other weeks I’ll barely post. I’ll try to keep y’all updated with what’s going on though.

And finally, I’ve already brainstormed a lot of cool ideas that have really gotten me super excited and inspired to start writing again ASAP but I really want to explore writing about different people and situations first, and get some of my ideas and prompts out there, so it might take me a while to get to requests or to post the imagines about you’re preferred dreamboat, so HOLD ON TIGHT it’s coming baby :)

Below is a list of all of the people that I write about, don’t be shy to suggest or ask if I can write about anybody else, chances are I might be familiar with who they are and I might be open to add them to the list :3

Celebrities:

Machine Gun Kelly (Colson Baker)

JP “Rook” Cappelletty

Calum Hood

Ashton Irwin

Youtubers:

Kian Lawley

Jeff Wittek

Elite:

Guzman

Valerio

Brooklyn 99:

Jake Peralta 

Stranger Things:

Stranger Things cast (platonic)

Billy Hargrove 

Steve Harrington

Twilight:

Paul Lahote

The 100:

Bellamy Blake

Octavia Blake (platonic)

Outerbanks:

JJ Maybank

[snaggle-chamsae]

Truth or a dream? | seongwoo

genre: angst

member: seongwoo

requested: nope

summary: you never knew that you are just a rebound to the most important person on earth to you. 

side note: hiii everyone!! i’m not sure if anyone still remembers me but i’m back here with another scenario :> i know this is really out of the blue because i’ve disappeared for a good 8 months since my last scenario and trust me, i really do miss updating and writing as much as i used to do. 

it has been a really really long time since i wrote something so please do forgive me because i know this is really crap... i just wanted to write something but unfortunately, i think i have lost all of my writing skills which really suck :( even having hiatus for 8 months, i still can’t get my life together :’) can someone explain why is my life such a mess 

anyways,, i do hope everyone is doing well in this new year 💓

“how can i ever forget someone that once meant the world to me?” you sighed as you lied on your bed

you honestly wished you knew the risk of love earlier

way earlier before you met seongwoo

because he crushed every little hope you have about love in your mind

just like how fairy tales are never true

looking at the condition of your heart, you knew it is a wiser choice to have never meet seongwoo at all

you thought seongwoo is finally the one after waiting patiently for all these years

you thought that he’s the guy that would stay with you

that would embrace your flaws

that would love you when you let your true self out

you thought seongwoo could help you get out of your comfort zone and turn your life around

but guess what

your dreams of finding such a person don’t exist after all

you had chills all over whenever you thought about seongwoo

because he fits exactly into your ideal type

tall? checked

a witty person? checked

having boyfriend manners that would melt your heart? checked

you just don’t get it sometimes

seongwoo fits exactly into your ideal type

and yet

he is also the one that broke your heart

ironic isn’t it?

and no matter how hard you try

your mind still remembers every single day with him, clearly

as in your memories with seongwoo is already part of your blood

right from day one, where you first met him at your part-time job, at the convenience store

he already left a positive impression

you realized how happy you were back then

and not only the first day

it happened for the next day and the day after

and surprisingly, even after bidding goodbye to seongwoo

that smile on your face has never left

he is probably the first guy that made you smile in such a long while

you assumed that all these kind of wild thoughts you were having would only last a couple of days

but oh boy

you are very wrong here

you smiled and brush off the thought of possibly falling in love with him

you even suspected yourself for being crazy for liking someone that you just met 2 weeks ago??

“nah nah that is not happening and that will never happen”

butttt

the more you denied, the harder you fall for seongwoo

you realized how doomed you are when he’s the last and first person on your mind

and before you know it, you really did like seongwoo already

your heart isn’t helping as well

it is already beating so fast just with the thought of seeing him later in the evening

the thought of having dinner together also gets you excited

and your smile got even wider after knowing that both of you stay near each other

“i swear you’re driving me nuts, seongwoo” that’s your conclusion whenever your heart beats like mad

and when you finally see at the store, oh boy

you could become like a fool

and honestly, it was freaking hard to control your feelings

when seongwoo would trap you between those shelves when you couldn’t reach for something on top

or all those moments where he would ruffle or pat your head just because he thinks you’re cute

your feelings would just get deeper each time

and every single day at work, it is just like an adventure

you have no idea what he would say to make your heart race a little more

“i got your back, you can always lean on me” 

seongwoo reassures you whenever he could tell that something is bothering you

with that, your trust got deeper each time, knowing that he always say such comforting words

you started letting seongwoo into your heart, thinking that he is someone worth entering your heart

you knew you were in love with seongwoo when you wrote everything that happened for the day in your diary

simply because you’re afraid that you will forget about all these precious memories that won’t come twice

you’re so afraid that a disaster might happen tomorrow and seongwoo would just leave you

but guess what :-)

each day with seongwoo just gets better

you have never look forward to working this much before

although it can be freaking tiring to sit there and just stare at all those snacks

but you know when seongwoo joins you for work, you never felt tired anymore

and even on days where seongwoo is working on another shift, your heart still skips a beat whenever you see his name appear on your phone’s notification

you’re just super happy whenever he texts you

and although you guys could be talking about random stuff, that makes your heart full enough

and the fact that he always tells you goodnight is really warming you up

at this rate, you started questioning yourself if seongwoo ever likes you

and when Christmas day comes, you really thought you got yourself an answer

“if you wanna see the christmas tree at the town later on, i don’t mind meeting you and we could go together”

when you read that text, you’re about to explode into billion pieces

did your crush really just asked you out????

you couldn’t believe your eyes

obviously, you agreed and went to meet seongwoo

oh god you thought working with him at the store alone is nice enough

that night was the best night ever

there wasn’t a moment that you didn’t stop smiling

you guys walked so close to each other that your shoulders would meet his once in a while

not to mention

your hands would brush against his and seongwoo didn’t even bother moving away

it was so freaking obvious you were in love that night

and that night is also the night you were pretty sure seongwoo felt the same way

you guys took a photo together like how couples would do

he held you close by the waist

while your heart could jump out any moment

after that night, things continued to get better

until one day

a day, just like any other day

but just that things started to collapse

seongwoo started working lesser and lesser

same goes for the number of text

and even if you do text him, you just couldn’t help but sense that coldness in his tone

“what’s wrong?” you wondered to yourself

you didn’t want to sound to overprotective and ask him that

your heart started to ache because it’s a question that you’ll never have the answer to

you constantly prayed that this would stop and it is just a nightmare for a day

but things continued to spiral down

he didn’t bother replying to your text

and you know things are so wrong when he decided to ignore and walk past you when you’re obviously there standing, looking at him

it drives you crazy

because how can someone that means the world to you, is also the reason why you’re hurting now

you just don’t understand how could things changed in a week

just shortly in a week, you forget how it’s like to smile

how it’s like to go to bed without having these endless thoughts running around

you just couldn’t figure out why

until your close friend, soojin asked if there’s anything bothering you and you just spilled everything

“i’m sorry that you’re going through this now but from what i see... i think you’re just a rebound to seongwoo”

“seongwoo just broke up with his girlfriend 2 months before you came and... they lasted for a good 5 years”

“... rebound?”

that’s all it takes to break your heart

now that you recalled every single memory, every single day spent with seongwoo

it really does seem like it

you were just a rebound after all

how great is that

now the question is, “how can i ever forget someone that once meant the world to me?”

you sighed as you lied your bed

were you in a dream all these while?

plsss do forgive me if this is really bad!! :(

[survivor-tierradelfuego]

Ep. 8: “The leftovers. The unchosen ones. The losers.” - Najwah

Cody A. 

https://youtu.be/OSh0mvYBSwo

James Hayden

We just got back from tribal and Ryan was blindsided 3-1. I feel bad for the guy because he had no idea this was going to happen, but that' Survivor for you. I thought there'd be a merge at 13, but Jay's questions at tribal put some doubt in my mind. If it's not a merge, then I think I'm an ok spot if my tribe has to go back to tribal. I'm just praying to the Survivor ORG gods for a merge today or tomorrow.

Cody A. 

https://youtu.be/sg4qe6MUjJU

James Hayden

https://youtu.be/oGcQdHpBzhY

Zack M

i don't know how they did it but let's take a moment to shout out james and najwah making it through tribal! no idol needed. im so proud of them. i feel like james will gladly come back to our original alliance once we merge but najwah's commentary always leaves me feeling uneasy. no offense but like do you want to play with anyone, najwah? lol. you have to somewhat trust someone at some point in this game. i would love to work with najwah for as long as possible if she is still around after the merge but unfortunately all of the comments that have been made throughout the game will keep me from promising her anything longterm out of fear that she will run around like a crazy person at merge. also, i believe that she will be the first person to mention my name from hanuha in hopes of it becoming a big move that she could put on her resume. maola doesn't know me yet. i guess they could see me as a threat because of being picked as a captain but like i don't consider maddison a threat. lol. pedro and kalle seem to want revenge. i think it would be fun to get her out first at merge. i'm just rambling now. i'm hungry. we got the new challenge. it's some mini online games or something like that. idk. i'm not a gamer so i was like i have therapy and can't do this bye. i wonder if they think i'm making up my therapy sometimes but like if you guys have ever questioned it i promise i'm not. i have it monday, wednesday, and fridays lol. anyways, cody pedro and kalle are playing. i really only trust me and ben so like fml. hopefully pedro and kalle understand that they are playing for their lives and we win again. fingers crossed. ok i'm going to get chicken tenders. bye. 

James Hayden

Things post tribal did not go according to plan. I would've put money on us merging tonight, but instead we have another tribe challenge. There's a small part of me that thinks Edge of Extinction is play in this season. After this challenge, we will be down to 12 people and seasons post 30 that have a 20 person cast merge at 13. I think there's a chance we do merge at 13, but the 13th person is the Edge returnee. 

As far as this challenge is concerned, video games aren't my strong point. I'm not a gamer, but these games are pretty straight forward. If we have to go back to tribal I'm voting Amy. Voting out Najwah would hurt my game because it would show the rest of Hanuha that I'm not #Hanuhastrong and it would tie us back up at 6 original Hanuha and 6 original Maola. Voting out Amy gives us a 7-5 advantage heading into a potential merge, shows I'm #Hanuhastrong, and weakens Maddison who I think was the ringleader of Maola 1.0. 

Najwah

Last night's tribal was interesting and actually the hardest tribal council. Ryan started a group with James and I 7 minutes after Palena was formed which already made us weary of him. He then tried to blindside me and made me believe he's blindsiding Amy and asked me about James and his previous alliance and it was just a mess. He's an awesome person and great team player but it was just too much scrambling and we all feared he'd flip flop throughout the game, which is dangerous. I'm trying not to use this space as therapy sessions lmao so I'll keep it short. Uhm, I think i have a good thing going with Amy and James. I just really hope we win this challenge, or rather, don't come last so that I can work with them going forward. Amy let me know she has a steal a vote and I told her about my fake idol and we'd like to work together. I really like these two people. A LOT. I lied in tribal when I said I didn't want to keep things Hanúha strong going forward. I can't believe I have to lie and blindside now lmao its becoming HECTIC. I'm really hoping we did enough to at least place second in this challenge. 🤞🏽🤞🏽

Olivia A

I’m doing so bad at all of these games rn and I feel so bad bc I asked specifically to not sit out of this challenge. I play little phone games and stuff literally all the time and am really good at them and for some reason am just doing so so bad today. If we lose then it’s probably my fault but also my alliance of 3 is really solid rn so I’m not actually worried about getting voted off. I still feel so bad I hate this so much.

Cody A. 

https://youtu.be/8QZTwYzVqVI

Pedro A

if tomorrow is the merge IMMM GONNA DIEEEEE...we won once again..cause we the baddest.....honestly how am i still alive?...LIKE HOW??....chilllleeee

Olivia A.

Okay woah I’m so happy about this win I was so nervous. I feel like we’re in a really good place going into the merge I’m excited :)

Pedro A

i was about to write my pled for help to the 3 hanuha original members..so they could keep me over kalle...but now who cares...i will throw anyone hunder the bus ....to get to that final

Cody A.

Coming into this game being the competitor that I am, I never imagined even entertaining the idea of throwing a challenge.... BUT when Ben came to me with the idea of making a big move on Zack, I’d be lying If I said I didn’t think about it.. That being said however, I didn’t throw it, but I also did not try as hard as I could have.... I’m very surprised we are not talking to Jay at tribal right now.. Moving forward though, we need Zack.. I need Zack.. If we are merging tonight it is strictly a numbers game from here. I am ready to get my hands dirty, make big moves, and WIN THIS DAMN GAME!!!

James Hayden

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXbaQPdhQw0&feature=youtu.be

Najwah

After that whole challenge experience and this entire week, I don't even know what to say. It's been a tiring experience. Being on a tribe where no one really connects is the worst. I tried telling James that the other tribes were highly competitive but for some reason he was okay with his scores? This entire week I've barely had any sleep. Even now, it's almost 5am and people are just on our tribe, OKAY with low scores? We were doomed from the beginning. The leftovers. The unchosen ones. The losers. Honestly, it messes with you psychologically too. I'm tired of scrambling and relying on tribemates to make an effort. I wanted to work with Amy but she's so difficult to get hold of/unresponsive even though we are on similar timezones. James is hellbent on keeping it Hanúha strong and really, hope he isn't playing me. My heart honestly cannot deal any betrayal so close to merge, I'd also like to just enjoy my Saturday. I deserve to be on the merge tribe. Will most likely be at the bottom ass of the tribe but I want to be in it, nonetheless. I worked for it. And right now, I'm exhausted. Annoyed. Frustrated. Fucking mad. This tribe swap has honestly been DRAINING. Everyone is too nice and meek and people just don't care about winning lol.  I hate the anxiety and sleeplessness of these past few days. I forgot what life was like before this ORG lol what did I do? I miss Leanne, still. The best person in this game. I hate it here. I just want to get to merge and be able to breathe again. 

Sarah

Ahhhhh I can’t believe our tribe, Maola, won the challenge by so much. I legit thought we were going to lose and didn’t have high enough scores. Aimee freaking killed it on her scores, wow. I have been telling Aimee how to buy the small perfume bottles that give you advantages and where to get coins to buy them. She used FIVE on that challenge yesterday (I wouldn’t have used all five butttt). Part of my strategy during this tribe swap has been buying/playing advantages so we don’t have to go to tribal because I still don’t know who is close to who, and the more I’m with this tribe the more I feel like they really just don’t talk to each other and there’s not much gameplay happening. Part of my strategy with convincing Aimee to buy and use advantages was also so I know how many coins she has because that can come in handy at Merge. I also wanted to give her information about the idol hunt (which I got from others— I’ve never actually idol hunted not knowing where or what I was getting) so she could trust me. I FREAKING hope tomorrow is the Merge! How awesome would it be for our original tribe to have the majority and for me to still have an idol. I feel like after this tribe swap, Cody and I will be in the best position in the game when it comes to all of our connections with people. We have our group with Zack and Ben, I feel close with James and now Aimee, and Cody feels close with Najwah. So we really are kind of in the middle and as long as people don’t find out about how close we are, we can just get all the information from others and share with each other. I guess I won’t stop posting a brick.... sorry. 

James Hayden

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjWjJwew7rc

Zack M

welp. i think this is it. could we finally be merging tonight after tribal? or are we swapping to two tribes of 6? that would be super lame. all i know is something is happening and i'm glad because i've been so bored in this tribe. we keep winning. there's no reason to play. i need action. the third tribe that starts with a p is going to tribal again. i don't remember the name. hopefully james and najwah stay hanuha strong so we can go into the merge 7 / 5. if najwah turns she will be my #1 target. she's too dangerous for my game to allow her to run around. other than that ... we came in second during the last competition. we were so lucky. the maola tribe killed it. i wish i would have played because our teams scores were low key pathetic. the p tribe could have beat us if all their players had participated. like is kalle even playing the game? is she here? i talked to her once. i know i should reach out in case it is the merge but it almost feels pointless. i'm sure she will run back to the 3 girls in maola. pedro seems to legit want revenge for john and is open to work together. i hope he isn't lying because i truly do want to take him as far as i can. look, i know i'm talking kind of cocky but i believe in acting in the way you want things to go. i'll be a clown if i'm blindsided. i don't mind. i like clowns. however, this is the way i see it going down in my head ... - we stay hanuha strong - we get out the 3 girls from maola - we get out kalle - we take out aimee and kalle - we take out pedro and james - we then take out sarah - then we have ben cody and i at finale 3 just how we planned it it could honestly work. we just have to figure out idols and make sure no one plays them correctly. and that's where i'm at right now. wish me luck. 

Aimee

http://rebloggy.com/post/gif-pokemon-cute-anime-kawaii-charmander-s01e01/106470386286 Happy dance! I’m all for keeping this tribe together. Haha I may have gone a little over board on making sure I did my best on the flash games, but you really never know what the other tribe is going to be doing or getting on these challenges. I hope this doesn’t make me look like a challenge threat if I make it to merge. Sarah has really helped me with idol hunting and finding coins and where to find the advantages. This is great trust building! Thanks Hanuha for the free coins I yoinked from one of your bags at your camp.😏 After everything that happened in the last tribe and despite me voting for her, Sarah and I have really come a long way! I truly had the wrong read on her before. She is actually now someone I am very close with and get along well! Last night after we won immunity she told me she really wants to work with me moving forward in the game! Let’s do it girl! I really enjoy talking to Grae. They seem really genuine and such a kind-hearted person. They keep giving me little messages that seem to hint at wanting to work together. I think at this point it’s unspoken but we both know we would love to. We just get along so well. I also vibe really well with Maddison and I know she could be a very good ally in the future in this game. Olivia proved she is a total team player on this tribe and listened to our advice during the immunity challenge and really stepped up her scores! I am having such a much better time on this tribe and am really enjoying myself. These relationships feel WAY more organic. I will do what I can to help keep this going! I would love to see all of us make it to merge. I’m also so so happy Najwah is still in the game after her last tribal and hopes she makes it through the next tribal!

James Hayden

We are 45 minutes away from tribal and Najwah messaged me saying Amy is ok. We were worried about her because she's been MIA over the past couple days. Per Najwah, Amy will not play her vote steal. It sounds like Amy wants out of the game and if this is what she wants, I will oblige. There's a small part of me that thinks Amy is playing us, but I don't think that's the case. 

Maddison

Everyone is expecting a merge tonight, and original Maola is down in numbers. Hoping I can find cracks and worm my way in. 

Pedro A

SO i told everything to zack......he seems to rule that allience....so he will 100% tell the others....and will try to take grae and maddison out...

Pedro A

Grae and Maddison just create fake alliences.so people dont write their name down....and make people feel safe... AND im here to make justice for john PERIODTTTT.... #justiceforjohn

Ben Kessler

I hope we are merging. Pedro is out for revenge against his former alliance. Zack is a threat and I need it to be known. Cody and I are hopefully solidified. If we merge, grae and maddison are apparently big threats according to Pedro. So that is fine with me. Just gotta keep making sure the people I'm closest with stay in.

Kalle N

hey I'm super high rn and I don't remember if I did this already or not so her I go. I hope we merge soon so I can vote people out that have wronged me. can't believe we won the last challenge even after I did basically nothing. ok gtg ily bye

Amy A

So this round has been tough. My Internet issues were definitely the reason my tribe lost and I wanted to quit cos I felt so terrible but I think Najwah and I can do something with my steal a vote. I’ll steal hers and vote James so no one will suspect we’re working together and then go into the merge with our little secret alliance. Bliss 

Olivia A

I’m excited for merge but not sure if we’ll able to get numbers together and have a majority.

Najwah

All I know is that shit is going to hit the fan at this tribal and I'm scared as hell. Only three of us. You'd think it would be easier but it's terrifying. 

Cody A

https://youtu.be/QM4CiTbrjgw

Pedro A

im scared of the merge...scared of the girls allience...scared of me being a target...for being a wild card ...and scared of maddison and graeee.....kill me at this point

[defunctblogtobedeleted]

6/25/17, 5:30am - idk

Another long two weeks on the books. I really like this update schedule, it’s like just long enough that I don’t forget everything that happened lol.

 I had a really weird dream sometime this week. It was kind of amazing, so I feel like writing about it for a sec. I was on some like cobblestoney/brickey kind of streets. A little bit Doctor Who London meets Chapel Hill I suppose, and all around me people were starting to riot. I think it was a feminist riot like I had encouraged Cullen to do months ago, and people were starting to shoot at each other. I was like duck this and took off running, but as I made my way down these outdoor escalators by a target I got scooped up by a group of five girls. Each of them grabbed a hold of one of my limbs and held me down and the last had a bat and was ready to smash my junk to pieces. I was like crying or something screaming not to hit my balls because they were still fragile lmao. When all seemed lost and I was about to take a beating one of the girls got bit by a fucking zombie on the neck and started gushing blood. All the girls freaked and I knew it was my time to get the fuck out of there so I bolted like hell. I ended up finding a laundromat tucked into a corner of this outdoor mall and so I decided to build myself a barricade there. I let in a little girl and her family, and they helped me move the washers and dryers, stacking them up (I guess I was superhuman or they weighed like nothing) to build a giant barricade at the entrance. We were safe from the zombies for a while, but some government agency started taking them down outside. What looked like an enormous leech made its way inside, and I held it up to see that it had a big mouth and teeth in the center of its belly. One of the zombies tried to make a big enough crack in the washers to get in, and I held up the leech who ate the zombie whole. But the government or somebody was trying to get us to come out of our hiding spot, saying they only needed one of us. When the family decided they were going to get rid of me because they didn’t know me I decided that this was bullshit because it was MY hiding spot, and furiously threw the leech out of the place. It landed in the middle of a small platoon of guys and exploded, turning them all into zombies. Then I was like holy shit this got even weirder and I woke up lol.

____

So anyway, Sunday I managed to get a nap in before heading out to pick up frankie. we talked for a while while fonzi was getting ready and all headed out to this food truck rodeo. We had some of the most delicious shit. Not gonna elaborate too much, but there were these pork belly bun sandwiches that exploded with a crackling of meat flavor and rounded with the savoryness of the fat in every bite. Holy shit I could eat them like every day of my life lol. We spent a good couple hours there, started doing this meme where Fonzi decided that Frankie looked like a celebrity from new york because her hair is all blonde too now. Since Sean and Angel didn’t come to meet us, we decided to hang out at angel’s for a bit. Just chilled and talked for a while while we deliberated whether or not to go swimming. When we finally decided to it was sunset, so his pool was closed, and then we tried to go to my pool but it was padlocked. Pretty damn disappointing, but we walked around catching fireflies and listening to music, which was nice. I took frankie home, but missed a turn and then a road was closed so we ended up detouring through chapel hill, and I decided we needed to stop and take a walk through the arboretum. Ended up going to one of the little grassy openings and in this big oak(?) tree up above us the fireflies must have been mating. In that particular tree they lit up every couple of seconds, making it sparkle in the night. There were so many fireflies that it was like a constant twinkling, like moving christmas light strung up between the leaves. It was beautiful. But not romantic in any sense unfortunately. lmfaooo she called me out asking if I was going to try to make out with her while we walked into the garden and I tried to play it off coyly like “who me? You were the one who kissed me last I remember.” and she had forgotten about this time that I may have actually imagined in my head so who fucking knows. The long and short of it is it seems like there isn’t an ounce of me that she’s attracted to. So that might work really well if I randomly decide to take her up on her aloof offer to move in with her in Boston one day. Who knows. I stll don’t know what I want to do.

Mon - work. Tony told me at the last minute I wouldn’t have patients that weekend, so I had to work mon and weds and take a hit on tuesday to follow through on my date with Katy

Tuesday I kicked some fucking assssss in doubles. Carried my buddy Will hard to get some experience for BMR. And Katy came after she got off work! I got to introduce her to ashleigh, it was sick. I was so fucking happy to have her there and so excited to get laid and so tired from burning out from doubles that I got demolished in singles and took off. Butttt unfortunately katy wasn’t feeling well so she fell asleep on me like Immediately when we got home. Was nice cuddling up with her though. Was torn for a while because I felt like I should be trying to hang out with Ashleigh and Aaron instead. Decided not to because she wasn’t feeling well and I should try to make her feel better because I’m a sappy fuck.

weds - work

thurs - had another really low key day with Katy. kinda just hung out until she got off work and then we just slept again. Bleh.

Luckily since I got the weekend off, it left me free to see Tony and Morgan for their birthday!! It was a fucking awesome weekend, showed up just in time friday night to smoke and go to dinner with everybody. Everybody fucking cheered when I came in the door, it’s like nothing ever changes with us I love all of em so much. Finally got to meet Tony and Morgan’s S.O.’s, and I like them both a lot. Once we were all a little stoned and being a little awk Laura made this hilarious offhand remark “ok, welcome to the conference. These are your friends.” that both became a great in-joke and also made me feel less terrible for being socially inept when I got high as balls for the first time in forever lmfao. Dinner was insanely good, we got like a whole bunch of small dishes at this place Pasteur or something, ate family style and got to try so many different dishes. I remember steak tar tar and this rib that was like eating caveman bacon on a stick being incredible. Also fried pickles and all sorts of stuff. Had a couple beers there, went to a bar and bought tony a tequila shot, got home, pulled the liquor out of my car and everybody got toootally fucking wasted. I don’t remember all that much, a little bit of a nostalgia fest with Alex for a while. Tony made the clutchest move ever ordering us a pizza super late in the night. But not too much later after gorging myself I puked my guts out and crashed on an air mattress with Erica lol. Was probably drunk enough that I might have tried to make moves otherwise, even though she has a bf now apparently you know me -_- . She’s lookin suppper fit nowadays. I think she’s still uniquely the only girl I’ve rejected in my life. Back when I was just a pure little kid and didn’t want to do anything sexual without it being special yet. Fuckin weird typing that now lol it doesn’t sound like me at all.

Saturday was river day, bought some beer and hiked with it about a mile to this river and spent most of the day there smoking drinking and chatting. It was fucking gorgeous out there, and everyone looked great together laying around on this rock. Got to know Dana and her gf much better, and tony’s gf. I think I drank like 5 or 6 beers floating around in the river, it was a lot of fun trying to ford across (it had poured that morning so the water was flowing pretty fast) without spilling any beers lol. Towards the end of us hanging out in the lake me and Laura floated around in this raft morgan had brought, and alex was reeling us in and casting us back out again like he was our dad. Such an excellent day. Until then I hadn’t told anyone about my vasectomy because I didn’t want to take attention away from everyone else, seeing how it had become such a talking piece on our family vacation and how much of my conversation with frankie had revolved around it. But I mentioned it in the river and said that it was because once I found out it was reversible I felt like the onus of birth control shouldn’t be put on the woman. Everyone was just like “huh wow that’s fucking awesome I totally agree,” and I like swam away for a bit instead of discussing it further. But when we were hiking back up to our cars Mike told me “yknow you might’ve started like a revolution back there with the vasectomy thing.” I was pretty fucking drunk and a little high so I honestly wondered if he was just fucking with me for a second, but I really appreciate that he said that after all the shit I got from my family. So that was a long ass afternoon of being out in the sun, and everyone got exhausted and fought to stay up but seemed like after we got back at some point everyone took a turn of getting too high and getting zonked out on the couch. I took a nap in Tony’s bed until his dad got there and got to see him for a bit. More great food was cooked, but I felt bad that I was so tired because I kinda wanted to rage again, especially since some new people came to hang that night, but not people that I knew. As a present Tony got the fire pit from their old house, and it was really neat to have another fire and sit around it with everyone. Sunday Tony and Morgan and some people cooked an enormous breakfast for everyone. Hung out with Mike and Erica and all talked about how good we look now lol. Eventually we said our goodbyes, I stuck around after everyone had left to chill with Mike and Tony for a while because I had nothing to do back at home. Katy decided she didn’t want to chill. I had waited on my dad for a long time to see him for lunch and so I didn’t smoke too much but got a little inebriated and watched nearly a whole season of Silicon Valley with Mike and Tony and his gf and Mary.  Sun - came back at 4, got home at 7, idr that night. Mon - Stayed up until like 6am watching Doctor Who, had to go to chapel hill for a JKCF function at 9, barely slept at all but met some new cooke friends so that was cool. Went to raleigh w/ will to play melee, got suuuper fucked. Went 0-2 in singles AND doubles, the worst placing I’ve had in... well ever, but it’s been months since I’ve had one that bad. Tues - Had a redemption tournament at Geeksboro. Got second place, actually won a little money. Disappointed that I threw away a few games that might’ve given me first but had a lot of fun. Katy told me she was sick that morning, and since she had been no fun to hang out with the last week and she bailed on our plans for Sunday and that day I decided to break things off with her. She was confused and hurt, of course, but I was just like “this is bullshit you’re treating me like I’m not a friend” and we hashed things out about her worrying about me having too strong feelings and that we’d just be friends who have sex and watch cartoons and stuff. So we’ve still been snapping every day but I still haven’t seen her in a while. I’m glad we’re still friends though, I was feeling helllla fucking self conscious for a hot minute.

Weds - I hung out watching Doctor Who most of the day, but went out to the bar Ashleigh was working to hang out for a while. She introduced me to her friend who was kinda plastered and seemed like she was leaning for a kiss on our introductory hug. So I was like woooooooh baby I love gboro people I can’t believe I have to play catchup at fucking 11pm lmao. Chugged a few free beers for this Shocktop promotion, and since I hadn’t eaten anything I got just tipsy enough that I could flirt with her without feeling like a Total asshole. We were chatting about some music and stuff, went inside and danced for the tiniest bit, and then she basically kissed me three times. Nothing egregious or any tongue or anything because I was still wary of her being a little off her ass, but I realized I got a text from ashleigh saying “come talk to me.” I was like “oh what’s up?” and she said “well it doesn’t matter now, it’s just that she’s married, they’re in a rough spot but I didn’t realize it was That rough.” ha haaaaaaaaaaa goddamn just my luck lol. She ended up puking on the side of the bar, I made better friends of a few of the regulars and played pool with them, I hung out with Aaron when he showed up at the end of the night and got to hear about the drama between him and his old roommate, and I sang a bunch of karaoke. Another fucking wonderful night, fshoooo. Got a philly cheesesteak and passed out, was super hungover the next morning lmao.

Thurs - got off work early story of that girl that I posted Fri - work, getting ready for bmr, finally got my spare setup in the office at work I’m so fucking happy it doesn’t make enough noise that it disturbs the patients. I’m gonna be a god one day lolol.

Also just as a benchmark I’m 4 episodes into season 8 of doctor who now. Comin along nicely. Def the hardest I’ve binged on a show in a longggggggg time.

OH and last I learned how to solder on weds. Finally did the work on that controller mod and it fucking brokkkkeee kinda tragic, I had to throw out the guts of the controller that I learned to play the game on. I thought I was going to be fucked for a while, but luckily Will had my back and lent me one of his spares that works even better than the one I had before. Might have actually been lucky as fuck despite being out $50 on the microchips and soldering kit lmao.

Anyway my life is amazing, I’ve been doing personal finance numbers in my head a lot but I think that’s because I’m just reassuring myself that I don’t have to worry about money much anymore. Eating well, still not doing much french fries, trying to quit soda. Started doing pushups+situps+pullups before my showers, so maybe I’ll be a little fitter, even. Life’s pretty great. So fucking excited for BMR2 next weekend, hopefully I’m gonna kick some ass. Gonna be a muchhh nerdier update next time I get on here lol.