#butch realness. gnc icon

[missmolsa]

Finally finished something. Peace and love on planet earth

[losergendered]

!! NOT A REQUEST !!

I saw you're a total drama fan,, do you have any headcanons? I like seeing other folks headcanons ^__^ /nf

oh you KNOW I DO BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im probably gonna make a followup post like. actually making the icons but. yes here they are (its just the gen 1 cast cause. theyre the best. and also i havent seen roti or pahkitew or the reboot)

Ezekiel is a genderqueer transmasc bisexual and uses he/they!

Sadie is a biaesthetic lesbian, Katie is a transfem omni lesbian, and they're dating!

Eva is an acespec demiplatonic unlabeled sapphic! She's also Sephardic!(one of my fave random hcs is that all of team escope is jewish but from different disporas :D)

Noah is a Mizrahi gnc gay guy! (ik that sometimes people consider mizrahi to be a subterm of sephardic but im making the distinction lol)

Izzy is an Ashkenazi genderfucked abrosexual aroace demihuman xenogirl who uses any pronouns!

Justin is a flamboric cupiospec arospec gay guy!

Beth is a nonbinary weirdgirlpunk bi lesbian who uses they/she!

Owen is. well i'll be so real with you i dont really care about him (IM SORRY OWEN FANS. I JUST DIDNT LIKE HIS JOKES VERY MUCH. his friendship w noah was cute tho) but like. literally i interpret him as canonically bisexual. like he was literally so in love with justin like that wasnt even subtext that just. was a fact

Geoff i also lowkey dont care about (SORRY) but i also find him bisexual. hes so in love with bridgette and hes so in love with brody. two hands <3

Bridgette doesn't label her sexuality, but has had feelings for multiple genders before!

DJ is questioning his sexuality, but thinks that he's somewhere on the aroace spectrum! He also considers himself a cisgender demiboy!

Leshawna is a bipan girl, and her girlboyfriend, Harold, is a bigender transfem genderqueer genderfluid bisexual boygirl!

Lindsay is a bi straight lesbian, and her partner, Tyler, is a cusper straight lesbian transfem boy who switches between identifying as a cishet man and a trans butch lesbian and uses he/she pronouns! (also this is because i like both headcanons for her lmao)

Trent is an ace bisexual with an aesthetic lean towards girls and a romantic lean towards boys! He leans more towards the cis man side of the gender spectrum, but likes to get a little funky with it u know. like he listens to arctic monkeys. u know.

Gwen is a bi lesbian/shadowlesbian trans girl who defaults to she/her, but doesn't mind neopronouns! Also gwourtney is real to me

Cody is a bisexual trans guy!

Sierra is an intersex trisfem paradoxibinary arospec bordersexual first-quarter/third-quarter neaptide mspec lesbian who prefers she/her, but also likes they/them and neos!

Duncan is a bisexual guy with a preference for girls! also i am still a duncney believer. who else still part of duncney nation in 2023.

Blaineley is an aphrodite bi lesbian and shes dating ME SHES DATING ME SHES MY WIFE ILY MS STACEY ANDREWS OHALLORAN. i actually made a whole oc to ship her with lmao. i guess i can include that um shes dating jules who's a lesbian and is my oc <3

Heather is a bisexual girl with a preference for girls and she's dating Alejandro, who is also bisexual! their romance was cute argue with the wall

Courtney is a bisexual girl and she's also a cit <3

Chris and Chef are both gay men and are married! gay wrongs

uhh random other hcs i have for non gen 1 chcs are bi trans girl kitty, bi straight emma, uh that little swagless kid from rr who competed with his dad uh hes a trans boy, jo is a butch bisexual girlboy & is dating brick, a gnc bisexual man, scott is bisexual and dating courtney, sam is a nonbinary bigender transfem straight lesbian who uses all pronouns & is dating dakota who is a bi trans girl, um that one dude who had the name reveal is ofc trans, svetlana is a transgender bi lesbian, vito is hypersexual and bi, uh my hcs for mal are. long so keep an eye out for a mogai-headcanons post in a few months, shawn (?? is that his name) is a transhet guy and is dating jasmine (??? i do not know these chcs at ALL) who is bisexual.

[artificial-hope]

Should probably show off my hcs cause not every headcanon can pander to stereotypes from 2017

Ezekiel: Gay (so deep in the closet he’s in Narnia), cis and pretty heavily conforms to typical gender expression but you could probably convince him to wear a dress and get his ears pierced

Eva: the butchest butch to ever butch in the history of butch, cis but gnc

Noah: Gay, asexual, sorry I don’t make the rules, Emma was a fluke, cis enough to where he doesn’t have to worry about it and also pretty gnc

Justin: likes men, pretty boy and sometimes pretty girl when he feels like it intersex and looks pretty androgynous cause of it

Katie: lesbian with comphet, has probably kissed Sadie on the mouth more times than any guy, cis

Tyler: bisexual with a pref for girls either to stupid to figure it out or just in heavy denial, dreams of kissing al passionately, cis

Izzy: fuck if I know fuck if SHE knows

Cody: Bisexual with a pref for girls but in like the Scott pilgrim way, trans guy who has such low self worth he again uses Scott pilgrim as his transition goals and to shape his personality

Beth: asexual, aromantic, cis

Sadie: Lesbian absolutely in love with Katie, wether or not those feelings are reciprocated I don’t know, cis

Courtney: lesbian with the worst case of comphet to ever exist I lowkey feel bad for her, cis

Harold: doesn’t care (pan), a guy with guys a girl with girls

Trent: pathetic bisexual, pathetic trans man

Bridgette: Bi girl (pref for guys) with the token straight boyfriend, also cis

Lindsay: straight 😔, iconic trans girl

Dj: gay guy, cis

Geoff: token cishet guy

Leshawna: the one cishet girl, had an experimental phase tho

Duncan: bisexual (pref for guys) aromantic and so deep in denial it’s not funny, nonbinary but he’s in the exact same boat about that as his sexuality if not in even more denial

Heather: likes women, trans guy with no cracks in that egg

Gwen: token bisexual girln’t

Owen: biiiiisexual with no real preference, cis

[speechbbls]

BLOG IS A WORK IN PROGRESS

Indie Selective Private Comic Book Multi Muse featuring a variety of characters from Marvel, DC, Image, and others.

Low Activity. Mutuals Only. OC/Dupe Friendly.

Dash Only

Muse List Located Here

Rules under Cut. Please Read.

Hello. My name is Hez. 35+ resident gnc they/them butch something or other. Gender is a spectrum and I'm all over the masc of center line. Neurodivergent as all hell.

This blog is highly selective. I will only write with/talk directly to muns who are mutuals only and over the age of 25. This is for my own comfort. Absolutely NO minors.

I do not do mains. Everyone is welcome here, so long as you're just not an absolute asshole.

I only use comics as icons/graphics. No human/irl fcs will be used here. I will write with irl fcs/movieverse muses, but these rps will be iconless on my end.

I have been rping on and off for 20+ years. I am old and I am tired. My primary form of ooc talk is over discord. Please ask for it if you would like to talk ooc. I will respond to tumblr IM but I can't guarantee a quick reply. Best way to contact me is through discord.

Don't be a dick. I have a busy real life and my rp blogs are low priority. This is not a job. I will block liberally if I feel my boundaries are being crossed. That being said, I rp to make friends and share passions. Please don't be afraid to approach me, even if we are non-mutuals. I will always respect your time.

I tend to write multi-para responses. I tend to not be able to reply well to one-liners. Please take that into consideration. I return effort for effort.

I enjoy plotting and developing chemistry no matter the relationship dynamic my characters are making. All muses on this blog are 18+. However, NSFW interactions will need to be taken off site or fade to black, if they happen at all.

I am viscerally anti-censorship. Don't Like, Don't Look applies here. I will tag everything in a scene. It's your responsibility to make an informed decision when engaging with my blog, not mine. That being said, I'm not a pro-shipper and certain topics do make me uncomfortable. Incest/underage/aged-up character smut is a no-go for me and I ask that such topics be tagged so I can blacklist. You will not find any of that here. But, if you're the sort who has a dni a mile long, we're not gonna be compatible. Live and Let Live.

I primarily write villains. They will do terrible things. I will not tone them down for tumblrs delicate sensibilities. I will tag triggering things liberally with *cw trigger* as the tag. If you would like something tagged, please let me know. If you're a person with a cognitive thinking system, I'm going to assume you agree with the phrase that MUN =/= MUSE.

Sorry if these rules aren't exactly sweet, but I've been on this disaster site for over a decade and I've seen shit go down. I'm done playing nice for the sake of my own mental health and people pleasing. If you dont like me, whatever. Not my job to please you. If you can get passed my crogedy tone, however, I can at least offer you some fun writing, engagement, and hopefully friendship.

I post a lot of headcanon and musings posts. Feel free to tumblr savior 'hez muses' if you don't want them cluttering your dash.

Enjoy your stay

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom 8-13 thoughts! again, under the cut bc I blew through 6 episodes in one go...

-LOVE THE WAY THE GHOST ZONE LOOKS. but theres fucking ghost cops??? ghost jail??? that SUCKS imagine dying and going to jail in your AFTERLIFE. danny going to JAIL WAS NOT something I expected. but seeing all the enemies together and work with danny to bust out. SO ICONIC I love that actually. and the thing about real world stuff acting as ghosts in the ghost zone is very cool.

-'there are some things more important that hunting ghosts!' mrs fenton says, about her husband forgetting their anaversary (FOR THE 18TH YEAR IN A ROW?? CHRIST) and not about, idk, their son clearly freaked out. she didnt even notice he was gone into the ghost zone!!! he might be a bad husband BUT shes not the best mom. they suck and I don't care about their relationship problems I care about these kids. danny doing his best to clean the house to keep his mom from getting mad at his dad?? hes such a good boy I want to cry, this is not his place, his dad should be cleaning his own shit up!!!

-maddie's butch lesbian sister is living my best life in her lil cabin. also being a snarky bitch to jack. queen. and her getting a 10th anniversary of her divorce. LOVE IT.

-mr. lancer being a cheerleader in his younger years makes perfect sense to me. king shit.

-dr. spectra's cat ears/mullet hairstyle?? sooo cute. I also just love the concept of a ghost just. sucking out people's positivity and feeding on emotions. a great villain. she put danny in a fucking diaper what the FUCK. and keeping it cold so no one would suspect shes a ghost??? INCREDIBLE. and her gay little blob sidekick. wlw mlm evil solidarity.

-JAZZ FOCUSED EP. YEAAAH!!! her first thought when she saw the ghosts was like 'omg i gotta tell danny :)' and her going to the teacher and also councilor trying to get help for him...shes just 16 but shes trying so hard to help him out :( watching this when youre younger I can imagine ppl are like omg annoying!! but watching this when im older im just like :( jazz baby im SO sorry </3 SHE BODIED THAT GHOST THOUGH. and the fact she didnt tell danny she knew surprised me. like, shes patient and waiting on him to tell her when hes ready!! thats so so sweet.

-christ the parents talking about 'PEELING IT LIKE AN ONION. AND EXAMINING REMAINS' of ghosts RIGHT INFRONT OF DANNY.

-'why am i so depressed and angry all the time!!' DANNY YOURE 14. i mean it IS a ghost this time, but...

-579$ top?? VALERIE NO ITS NOT EVEN CUTE IT DOESNT EVEN GO WITH THAT OUTFIT AAAA. tho this ep is called shades of gray..VALERIE FOCUSED EP FINALLY????! *THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE* I already knew about red huntress from my redesigns, but I didn't exactly know what that entails or how/why, so, it's fun to see the Origins.

-ghost pubby! ghost pubby!!!!! why is the dog a ghost?? the implication that the company had guard dogs and got rid of them...what did they DO. is it just the unfinished business?? of not having that toy it was looking for?? god I hope so.

I feel SOOO bad for valerie tho, my god. her friends are shunning her for what, because her dad lost her job and she had to move??? horrible. (and the fact the dog wrecked the moving van too...) I also love how 'from wisconsin' on the package was an IMMEDIATE RED FLAG FOR ME. WISCONSIN=EVIL NOW. vlads so petty.

-it took valerie like 5 mins to get the hang of hunting ghosts and shes already a much bigger threat than his parents tbh. who've been trying and studying this for years. and a more valid reason <3 love her shes so cute and cool. new daughter alert.

-'i should do SOMETHING to help valerie' no shit danny???

-'who is that, awesome outfit!' -top gay sam moments. i was going to say. before it immediately cuts to sam kissing danny LMFAOOO. don't think I like that, it puts tucker in a weird third wheel position... the next ep involves them holding hands and blushing when danny's cold...URGH No. not a fan ngl. the trope of 'if theres a girl in a trio she has to end up with one of the two guys!!'

-right as I say that they take it to extremes!! and ember shoots him with a love ray gun that makes him OBSESSIVE OVER SAM. AND SHE TAKES HIS HANDS AND SAYS 'YOU DONT FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT ME, I DONT FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT YOU' and her saying she doesnt want to be together like this. and tucker saying 'i always knew you two would get together!!' dont manifest it tucker please. the show pushing for it so hard makes me not want it KSHKJKJD I KNOW its probably canon. it sucks though. im a hater.

-vlad just LURKING AROUND THE SCHOOL GIVING VALERIE GIFTS ASJKDHKJ YOU WEIRD PETTY OLD MAN GO HOME!!!

-EMBERRRRR YOU WILL REMEMBERRRRRR . this is the one thing I kinda remember from when I was a kid EMBERRRRR ilu. top 10 cartoon bops. sams being a hater. popular things are popular for a reason. mr. lancer also being a hater. also everyone wearing her color scheme ..its a really good look, the purple, black, and minty color...

-penguins exist in the ghost zone. confirmed.

-EMBER JUST SHOWING UP AT A RANDOM HIGHSCHOOL TO PLAY?? UNANNOUNCED, MID DAY??? girl get a tour schedule. make some money or smth damn. I know shes probably doing it for the power boost but. lord. anyway if your show doesnt have a concert scene/ep, is it even valid.

-fellas is this gay. (she uses a GRAPPLING HOOK TO SHOOT OUT THE WINDOW AFTER SEEING AN EMBER VAN GO BY RIGHT AFTER THIS SHOT)

-hey, she had an undercut at some point!! my redesign!!! was accurate!! in..a way

-I feel like danny has a lot of pent up aggression ngl, him being heartbroken about sam and immediately going IM GONNA GO TAKE IT OUT ON EMBER. I mean she needs to be stopped I guess But. jazz has the right idea he needs therapy and a HEALTHY outlet.

-tucker singing > my singing

-girls cant be gamers -tucker and danny sexist moments. her being chaos in the game OWNED.

-TUCKERS HAT IS A BERET??? I THOUGHT IT WAS A BEANIE. SAM CALLED IT A BERET. WH.

-it was actually nice of lancer to let danny retake the test, and he go to play games again. smh. epic cringe gamer moments compilation. and driving him home!!! I actually like him as a character. anyway teachers like lancer are SO appreciated. I was failing middle school because of mental problems, and felt so dumb and got embarrassed by teachers who would just get onto me instead of bothering to ask what the real problem was, but when I was taking my ged classes I had a wonderful teacher who kept reassuring me that I was smart, and I got honors!! danny is SUCH a little shit to him (understandable, 14, but) but seeing them getting along better and danny putting in effort. SO CUTE. THATS MY SON, STUDYING HARD!!!! and being so PROUD OF HIMSELF!!! 91!!! BITCH!!! A- is STILL AN A!!!

-'why dont they ever realize thats me in a dress' mr lancer i am CRYING. i realized.

-technus being my ghost grandpa who cant game asking tucker for help. bless his heart. his out of date old ppl lingo circles back to being endearing <3 tucker not recognizing him despite the like, lack of any kind of serious disguise...I do love their lil in-game outfits....sam being the tank rules. I like technus' spider design also. more characters need to be giant freaky spiders, imo.

-finding your gf a new host because she cant maintain her ghost body outside the zone? amazing. using jazz as the host? ILL KILL YOU. jazz immediately accepting a ride home from a guy she just met and letting him know where she lives. letting him IN THE HOUSE??? nooo girl no lets use common sense </3

-sooo cringe the parents were like 'good job for spying on your sister' tho wtffff. doesnt matter if hes a bad guy, thats fucked. everytime these parents BREATHE im like. these are MY kids now <3

-BAD LUCK BEING A THEME OF THE 13TH EPISODE. thats super fun. johnny 13 being his name is so. iconic. your last name is a NUMBER? also goth tucker. I actually love the look. everyone looks good goth. 'the ladies love the eyeliner and onyx nail polish' sam you are sooo right every man needs to at least try those two things. im a lesbian and I agree. same, danny, your bff is gnc af

-LOVE kitty's design. and just, the concept of a ghost with a bike. couple goals, except yes stay away from jazz.

[anachronisticcrab]

Gender and Sexuality Headcanons

Nico: He/They/Fae. Beautiful nonbinary man. Very homosexual. Boys are amazing 😌

Will: Trans. Uses he/him pronouns, homoflexible boy. Part of me can see nonbinary/genderqueer Will where he’s a little bit agender (but that could just be projection...)

Piper: Polysexual Demigirl Queen. She/they. Major ‘not a girl’ vibes

Annabeth: doesn’t give a shit about gender norms. Wears suits and tuxedos. Cis but gnc. Heteroflexible. she/her

Percy: Bisexual King. Cis but trans ally. He/him

Jason: Demisexual and biromantic. Cis guy (uses he/him)

Reyna: Ace Biromantic. Beautiful trans woman, we stan her😌😌

Frank: Asexual demiromantic (prefers feminine presenting ppl, but no real gender preference). I can see trans boy Frank, and also demiboy Frank. No matter what, he uses he/him

Hazel: Asexual Demi-panromantic. Agender Hazel is god tier. She/her pronouns

Leo: very much Not Straight. Pansexual Genderqueer King. He/it pronouns. Definitely has some serious internalized homophobia, but then again who doesn’t?

Meg: She gives me major chaotic nonbinary lesbian vibes, ngl. She had a FAT crush on Luguselwa. She/it pronouns. Meg is a creature from the bog and women are beautiful, what more can I say?

Shel: Lesbian ICON. She is amab demigirl flux (agender is the other gender) and uses she/her

Lester: Pansexual, does not get gender and doesn’t particularly care about pronouns, but typically uses he/him

Luguselwa: Butch Lesbian Nonbinary Woman (she/they)

Thalia: Asexual panromantic, a little bit agender ngl. Uses she/her

Grover: Trans dude. You cannot change my mind. Asexual heteromantic. He/him

Might do a part 2 but idk

[iphisesque]

spare sexuality headcanons for the atla characters ma'am? yours are always so on point I swear

why thank you! I do have Quite Some Headcanons about their sexualities, namely "these bitches gay"

Aang is a gnc icon and he's definitely bi. I feel like he would canonically say "I want to make sure I keep my options open, who knows who I'll fall in love with :D" and I love that about him

Sokka is of course our disaster bi king. where would we be without him

Katara gives me straight vibes but this is not an insult I promise 😭 I have a straight best friend who is very wholesome and she reminds me a lot of Katara so she's the good kind of straight also statistically speaking at least one of them will be straight

Zuko is DELIVERING the bisexual emo icon realness. I was not a person yet in 2007 but if I had been Lord help me because the gender envy I would have felt for this bitch is unspeakable

Toph is a nb butch lesbian (LISTEN I HADN'T EVEN THOUGHT OF THE STONE PUN UNTIL NOW. THIS IS UNINTENTIONAL) and Katara is her gay awakening

the Kyoshi warriors are of course an elite sapphic militia which means that queen Suki is bisexual. we been knew tho you can tell by her haircut

Azula is my sorely needed mean dyke representation ❤️ finally I feel seen as a lesbian who's an absolute dick but unironically everything about Azula OOZES dyke energy especially those "romantic" interactions with men where she's literally selecting those who could serve her the most. truly a snapshot of me in fourth grade deciding to fake a crush on the popular kid

Mai is of course also serving bisexual emo realness except she like a true emo also makes sure to pretend she has no feelings, unlike that poser boyfriend of hers (also her and Ty Lee are goth/prep, or if you're Italian emo/truzzi, RIGHTS)

Ty Lee leaves me genuinely undecided because I don't know if I see her as a clueless lesbian or bi. either way she's a sapphic goddess stan Mailee for clear skin ✨

[rittz]

thoughts about being trans, idk where else to put them so here u go

it’s not like i don’t have trans guy friends to talk to about this, it’s just usually in the form of jokes or passing comments rather than an actually serious conversation. also, the transmasc people that i’m closest to identify more with the label “nonbinary” than i do-- it’s not like they couldn’t understand or relate to things i’m saying, but i’m just assuming that they probably don’t feel the exact same way i do

anyway, as a trans person we get often asked “so why do you feel like a [gender]?”, and the answer is usually some variation of “i just feel like it”. this is the most accurate but also vaguest possible answer, so i kinda wanted to break down my personal answer to that question?

basically, i identify as a man because i identify with men. in a general and also personal sense. gender stereotypes are something that trans people by necessity both embrace and reject. i relate to gender stereotypes about men more than those of women-- i’m less outwardly emotional, i like being handy, i don’t like kids, i have questionable personal hygiene, etc-- but obviously these things alone don’t make someone a man. however... you can’t deny that there is some general truth about behavioral differences between men and women (bc of society, not biology). men and women both experience different problems in the world, and each have trouble understanding the experiences and problems of the other. generally, i can relate to the experiences and problems of men more than those of women, even if it seems like i shouldn’t (for example, i am not afraid of walking alone at night, even though i am very tiny).

i, from a young age, have had a constant yearning for more male friends. i would occasionally choose to play video games as a male character. i was upset that i couldn’t be in boy scouts. i have been jealous of my younger brothers being treated by my parents the ways i wished i was treated. when i imagined myself older, i pictured myself less like my mom and more like my dad. when i’m around men, i want them to treat me like one of them. i want to be seen as a man.

and i think that’s what being trans really boils down to. wanting to be seen as someone other than how everyone sees you. wanting what you see on the outside to match how you feel on the inside. this obviously extends to nonbinary individuals, who face their own struggle when it comes to presentation. but at the end of the day, i think that presentation is equally important to gender identity as internal feelings. i mean, i think we’re all familiar with the research proving that transitioning makes trans people happier. surgery is an invasive, expensive, painful process that i DON’T think is necessary for every trans person, and HRT isn’t always easy to get. but changing a name, getting a new haircut, dressing differently, binding, etc. counts as transitioning. you don’t have to hate your body to be trans, but wanting to alter it in order to better connect your internal identity with your presentation, i think is necessary in order to consider yourself to be trans. 

i will admit i am confused by “GNC trans men” i see on tumblr and insta, who use he/him pronouns but exclusively present femininely. i’m not talking about trans guys who don’t yet pass, i mean trans guys who don’t want to. i don’t harbor any ill will, i’m just confused. if i understand being trans to mean “wanting what you see on the outside to match how you feel on the inside”, you can see how. doesn’t that make you feel dysphoric? don’t you want people who see you to read you as male? how is your life different from when you didn’t identify as male but presented the same way? this isn’t me trying to gatekeep on who’s “trans enough”, and especially when it comes to nonbinary identities it’s arbitrary to harp on presentation like this. but like, what’s going on here?

taking a turn here that will come back around, an extremely key component to why i identify as and with men is my sexuality. i have always idolized, envied, and evoked various queer icons from media and real life. the hunky, grunting, macho, hetero version of “man” never appealed to me the way that the fashionable, artsy, flirty, homo version of “man” did. drag queens, my mom’s hairdresser, glam rock stars, i could go on. associating my more feminine qualities with GAY stereotypes instead of FEMALE stereotypes suddenly made more sense, and made me feel less dysphoric. it’s also something that took me a long time to realize, because i had surrounded myself with queers who were mostly attracted to women. transmascs and butch lesbians historically have a lot in common, but personally, i didn’t relate as much to lesbians as i did to drag queens. in dating and loving men, i developed my understanding of them. but my attraction to men was why it had taken me so long to realize i felt more like a man-- i thought i was just some weird straight girl.

now, am i calling these “GNC gay trans men” with long pink hair and poofy skirts and conventionally attractive bisexual boyfriends “weird straight girls”? ...well, not to their faces. but i have to admit that i’m thinking it. these people would never go to a predominantly-male gay bar, these people would never be harassed on the street. i’m not saying i know someone’s identity better than they do, but i don’t agree with the liberal utopian ideal of “let everyone do whatever they want as long as they aren’t hurting anyone” when taken to mean that we can’t question other people’s choices. “why do you feel like a man?” is a question that, coming from another trans person, isn’t inherently transphobic. it’s not “forcing” someone to “prove” their “transness”, no one “owes” me an explanation of their identity. i’m just confused. i don’t disapprove of the way these people live their lives, i just want to know why.

a straight girl being feminine is different from a gay man being feminine, because it has less to do with personality and more to do with society’s historic view of gay men as closer to female than male because of the loving and fucking men aspect. an AMAB gay man wearing makeup and a crop top probably just wants to look good, but he is also signaling to other men that he’s gay via gender non-conformance. by being AFAB and female-passing, wearing makeup and a crop top is not GNC. in fact it’s pretty GC, and gay men will not recognize you as a gay man.

it’s easy to say “gender is fake so do whatever you want”, but like, we have to acknowledge reality. time is a social construct too, but we still use days of the week when talking to each other. strangers will treat you differently depending on what gender they interpret you as. different people will be willing to date you or not. you have to choose which public bathroom to go in. if being misgendered doesn’t bother these people, then who cares? but if it DOES, which it usually does, wouldn’t you want to take steps to prevent being misgendered in the future? if your desire to present femininely is stronger then your desire to be seen as male, then like... why call yourself a male at all? ultimately nothing these people do will really affect me in any way. it just makes me wonder if these people will eventually go on to present as male, or if they will later ID as nonbinary or even cis. i encourage people trying out different labels and exploring their identity, so it’s not like i think these people SHOULDN’T identify as trans guys. it’s more like, i wish they were able to articulate WHY they identify as trans more than “because i said so”. not wanting to be a woman doesn’t automatically make you a man, it just makes you not a woman.

maybe i’m particularly cynical because of the MULTIPLE times that people with larger online followings who identify and present this way have later turned out to be lying, manipulative people. hopefully it goes without saying that i do NOT think that everyone who identifies and presents this way is a toxic liar. the reason i bring it up is because some people genuinely can’t understand the possibility or purpose of misleadingly claiming a marginalized identity, but it can and does happen. an analogy could be made here about white people claiming indigenous heritage. we all WANT to believe what people say about themselves, and asking for “proof” is a social no-no. but we shouldn’t just... automatically trust everything someone says about themselves, right? and as bad as i WANT to live in a world where gender doesn’t matter and everyone default uses neutral pronouns and there are no divisions in clothing stores and bathrooms, we don’t live in that world (yet). when you are AFAB, /extremely/ femininely presenting, and have little to no plans of transitioning, saying “i am a man” will not make other people see you as one. and if you don’t want to be seen as a man, then maybe you aren’t one.

[tenbees]

(1) hi!! this may be a really dumb question but you seem kinda knowledgable and i really want to learn bc i’m clueless. basically, i’ve always wondered what the purpose (for lack of better word) was behind lesbian femme/butch roles? like ik it’s historically pretty significant, but is there a particular “revolutionary” reason behind a masculine person and feminine person being paired together and it being such an iconic part of lesbian herstory? like ik that gender non-conformity is p important

(2) within women, specifically lesbians, especially as a way to signal to other women/lesbians that they are, well, lesbian. it’s also rebelling against assigned cultural and gender roles and the idea that femininity is required to be a “real” woman, and also mainly bc most people assume feminine women and girls are het. but like, there are some lesbians who are feminine themselves and mainly like other feminine women/lesbians. is this a “wrong” or incorrect/narrow minded pairing somehow?

(3) are feminine-presenting lesbians somehow “less” revolutionary than, say, a gnc bi or straight woman? and like, w the femme/butch complementary roles within lesbianism, is this to show that a masc/feminine pairing isn’t inherently hetero/doesn’t exclusively belong to het couples? are feminine lesbians who date other feminine lesbians betraying lesbian culture and appeasing straight men somehow just bc they want to be feminine for each other? i’ve just always wondered about this and

(4) i’m a woman who presents pretty feminine, although if it were up to me i’d just be like. casual feminine. maybe a snapback or sth. but i am attracted to other feminine women and i don’t particularly have a desire to “look good” for a butch/masculine-presenting woman in a sort of complementary yin and yang role/dynamic, i.e “strong butch and soft femme” stereotypes which we see often in the lesbian community. so i was curious about your thoughts on this. thank you and sorry for the spam! 🌷

😭 i’m such a bad person to ask any questions about butch/femme because tbh i don’t really get it.

i think the historical reason for the pairing is that there really was no model for lesbian relationships, so women defaulted to a relationship model that resembled heterosexuality–butches and femmes had to date each other, butches who were fucked by another butch were ridiculed and feminized, people who didn’t fit into either category were seen as outsiders and called kikis, butches had to pursue femmes, etc, but with a little more fluidity because people would sometimes have different roles in different relationships. i think this is a contentious thing to say because it implies that butches are like men but… i’m not sure how you could argue that a system where masculine people Have to date feminine people isn’t drawing deliberate parallels to heterosexuality? especially when people in that time period said that it was safer to be out in public when at first glance you looked like a man and a woman? and i don’t think saying that there are obvious parallels is the same as saying that butches Are men. butches and femmes will also talk about how they each play different roles in the relationship–the butch protects the femme, the femme is a safe place for the butch, the femme protects the butch by existing at her side as a ‘respectable’ looking woman, etc.

i don’t think it’s intended to show that masc/fem couples aren’t inherently het or to rebel against gender norms (although people will say that femmes are revolutionary because they perform femininity for women and not men which i do Not get because the world doesn’t care why you wear a dress & makeup so long as you do it)–people will talk about how they knew deep inside that they were always femme/butch, that they always felt drawn towards protecting feminine women, that they always wanted to give themselves to a masculine woman, etc. i don’t really get it lol and i think @a-real-lesbian-speaks said this mooonths ago, but when i see poetry about like… work boots next to stilettos or a butch needing the arms of a femme and a bunch of people saying that it made them emotional and they can relate so much, i feel the same way that i do when queer people talk about their gender identities tbh. it seems like some internal lesbian-specific gender experience that needs that yin/yang complement and i literally don’t understand when people talk about it, but there you go lol.

i think feminine lesbians disobey cultural standards more than gnc bihet women, but it is a weird question to me because calling one more revolutionary than the other sort of gets into… homosexuality as revolution, when it’s just something we’re born with and that is given this deviant, rebel status by society. feminine lesbians and gnc bihet women also deal with different problems, so it feels like comparing apples and oranges to me.

also, it isn’t narrow-minded to be a feminine woman attracted to other feminine women! butch/femme is a subculture that tbh has gained this weird revered status on tumblr. the amount of people who talk about it compared to the amount of people who actually participate in it is very disproportionate, at least from what i’ve seen. there are many, many lesbians who are neither of them and we can go be confused in our own little corner lol. and who you’re attracted to or choose to date shouldn’t be political anyway.

[elusianknight]

i’m so sick of the flag discourse oh my god

real talk here. if the creator of the og flag didn’t make a blog to advertise how fucking disgusting she was, we would’ve been using this flag the whole time and not a single thing would have changed.  like, she’s not making money off it, she’s not famous bc of it, her harmful views aren’t spread by people seeing the flag.  

the new flag (the orange and pink one in my icon) was created with the specific message of inclusivity in direct opposition to the original creator’s views (which, i can’t emphasize enough, are divorced from the flag ANYWAY bc its just COLORED STRIPES).

so... the fact.......... that there’s discourse now about if the person who made THIS flag, with the excplicit intention of being inclusive, has a 100% spotless track record of being Non Problematique in all things .... is so fucking frustrating, oh my god.

After we spent weeks? months? of so many fucking MS paint vomit flags (plenty of them by non lesbians too which is like ?????? come on... REALLY?) this one, in my lesbian opinion, really hits the nail on the head.  Previously, I’d seen butch flags in orange, so the pink + orange seems to really capture the butch/femme dynamic, the white stripe seems representative of trans and gnc lesbians... not to mention, it’s close enough to the original that it is still very recognizable.  And bonus, it was made with the intention of including all lesbians. Yay!

tldr: i found a flag that i and many other lesbians like. i’m not about to dig through 10 years of their internet receipts to see if they’ve ever done anything that i didn’t like.  The fact that they made this flag with the explicit intention of inclusivity seems to me like a pretty good indicator that they didn’t have idk, fucking ulterior motives or bad intentions when it comes to making the flag or who it represents.  

[birdnormal]

do all the even numbers!

2. Favorite LGBT singer/instrumentalist?

probably janelle monae! i like a lot tho

4. Who’s the best Gay Icon™?

haruka fuckin tenoh and michiru fuckin kaioh

6. How long did your questioning process take (if you’re not still going through it)?

im 27 and just now figured out im a lesbian so like. A While

8. What’s your favorite color?

like pale blue? pastel pink is nice too

10. Have you ever been to a pride event?

been in several pride parades, plannin’ on another this year!

12. Favorite LGBT artist/writer?

all my friends.

14. How do you express your sexuality/gender?

well i just bought a Lesbian Scarf so theres that

but also im slowly gettin more openly gnc/nb/butch - my hairs short, im buyin stuff in the mens section, etc

16. What LGBT charities/organizations do you support?

i was part of the bay area bisexual network stuff until i realized im... not... bi, altho i still support them! also have donated to GLAAD a few times

18. Favorite LGBT film or actor?

uhhhh why are all these questions asking about real people. i dont know any real people.

20. What are your plans for this June?

NASA PRIDE CONTINGENT NASA PRIDE CONTINGENT

[felinehypocritical]

people are like. obsessed w max being not a ~~~stereotypical tomboy~~~ and how she still looked Feminine and Beautiful and it annoys me bc like..... its clear these people dont consider gender non-conforming girls to be real girls and that girls have to have some semblance of femininity or else theyre Too Stereotypical Tomboy!!! i mean god damn some girls reject feminine beauty standards and thats ok why does every girl still have to be Feminine in order to be good enough for yall. you did this with el too about how Pretty and Feminine she was “even with short hair” as if having short hair hinders you from being a girl correctly and you have to compensate. get your nasty, gnc girl hating hands off of our beautiful butch lesbian icons 

[offmyterf]

These people are hilarious. Back then, GNC was not about denying the reality of biological sex, it was a rebellion against GENDER norms that constructed people to strict boxes based on their sex. Meaning, people like Marsha P Johnson did in fact identify as GAY MALES. Stop twisting history to fit the postmodern SJW-driven, Liberal-doublethink tainted Orwellian nightmare that it is today.

Also, Stormé was a drag king. TRAs want to ban drag though! Drag was an essential and iconic part of that world back then! Banning drag is banning freedom of expression over some feelings about drag being a "parody" of transness... how? It parodies the patriatchy's invention of femininity or masculinity, which.... ironically, is what some trenders like to do:

Stormé was a butch lesbian drag king and she IS lesbian history, not a political pawn. Lesbian Feminists claiming her as a hero is EXPECTED.

(This post is not directed at real transfolk with dysphoria and who truly struggle with this. This is directed at drag performers who bash women and drag queens because they make them uncomfortable.)

So there are TERFs and SWERFs out there now who are claiming Stormé DeLarverie as ‘their’ Stonewall heritage because she identified as a butch lesbian and to those TERFs and SWERFs I just want to say: FUCK YOU. 

Stormé DeLarverie was an african american gender nonconforming butch lesian and a hero and she was no fucking TERF or SWERF. 

Stormé was a regular at the Stonewall where the majority of the visitors were trans, the majority was people of color and the majority was involved in some kind of sex work. This was the community she was part of, these were many of her friends, these were the people she protected. Why else do you think the visitors of Stonewall responded to her call to do something against police brutality? Because they knew and recognized her as someone who looked out for them. After Stonewall she continued to work at and frequent bars that put up drag shows and provided safe spaces for transgender people. As a gender nonconforming person she stood in solidarity with transgender people and queer sex workers and frequently risked her life for them. 

It is typical that TERFs and SWERFs are trying to do this 3 years after her death because if you all did this while she was alive she would have told you to fuck off before she could get her baseball bat. How dare you shit on everything she stood for. 

Fuck you for trying to tarnish her memory with your hate. You disgust me. 

[yovelknell]

4, 11 and 13 for the pride ask post👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩🍓🍒💖💝❤️🍯💗🌺🍉💘🍋🌸💓💞💕💓💞🌸💘🍋🍯💗💝❤️🌺🍉❤️👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩🍓🍒

4. Who’s the best Gay Icon™?

I’m honestly not sure of a specific person here but all of the openly gnc sapphics/wlw who openly hate men and dress Gay are a key part in my confortableness and appreciation of lesbianism and the sapphic community as a whole

11. What’s your favorite thing about your flag(s)?

I really only use the lesbian flag, although I suppose I could use the ““butch lesbian” flag (although there are some issues with it). I like the lesbian flag because of the political unity it represents and I like the numerous lines (although I feel disconnected from the more feminine aspects of the color scheme)

13. How often do you get tired of The Straights?

Often, I have little patience down heterosexuality. I love some very important straight people in my life, even as they are somewhat ignorant. But I get more frustrated with heterosexuality itself. It gets real hard and real real fast if I start thinking too much about it because it’s really easy to goof about it but it is deep down quite oppressive (lesbian loneliness is real)

(thanks for the ask!! i really appreciate it!)

[iwantedtheoppositeofthis]

Sexism is a complicated topic. I’ve only been in queer spaces in real life once so I have very little experience with how I might be treated in those spaces. Online it’s very hard to find a butch or stage community and there’s a lot of agressiom towards masculine women. There aren’t many gnc women in media but every single time one appears in a story or the news I get to hear about how no one needs this person around and she’s a shameful misogynist icon.

In general being a masculine woman is strange. It changes how people treat you but it doesn’t exempt you from misogyny. In my personal experience I get less unwanted sexual attention either because I’m considered too mannish to be attractive or am visibly queer and therefore they assume I’m a lesbian.

At the end of the day I’m still a woman to them. People tend to see me as inappropriately aggressive and scary if I’m passionate or even slightly emotional about a topic. It’s a common experience for women but I think being masculine inhances people’s reactions.

There’s a certain societal tendency to find it charming when women are masculine. It can be seen as imitating men and therefore acknowledging that women and femininity are inferior and therefore masculine women are bettering themselves while enforcing misogyny but there’s a fine line between charming and threatening. As soon as a woman is seen as genuinely masculine instead of merely imitating it or a replacement for men she is seen as dangerous. Historically this has been true for queer women and I feel this holds true in my own life.

gender nonconformity is always punished & never privileged thanks for coming to my ted talk hope you all have a great night