#but yknow what? worth it LMAOO
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MY LITTLE SISTER DREW A LITTLE KIRA FOR ME, CAN WE ALL TAKE A MOMENT TO APPRECIATE THIS??
#my sister's always been the artist in the family#while i've been the writer LMAO#look at what she drew for me!!!!#yall she charged me robux for this despite her drawing it without me telling her to ALSDKFJH#but yknow what? worth it LMAOO#ITS SO CUUUUTE#she's been trying out animations lately look at it!#[ 𝐢𝐢. ] visage › chaos only thrives when it is loved by the wild and never the weak.
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venting in the tags yippeee
#damien.txt#gender talk time 🤪✌️#....................................................................................#screaming crying throwing up rolling around on the ground <- said completely deadpan#uhm. as always. thinking abt gender. and questioning. my whole life. bc. i cant stop doing that#soooooo like. my big thing. abt gender. is as much as im like. he/they-ing it here and irl. its kind of... complicated?#as ive gone on ive realized more and more that i dont. really. feeling Anything towards those pronouns#neither do i she/her. or they/them.#and just generally the whole Concepts of male/female? so like. im always like hmm. whats happening here#and other completely incoherent statements djbdhdbf sorrry anyways#i keep having these moments where im like. hmm. maybe. im leaning too hard into the masc. maybe i am not. he at all.#but ive like. really full committed to the bit yknow? like esp irl. all the ppl ive introduced myself to in the last 2 years have known me#as 'he'. and as someone who wears mostly masc clothing and generally attempts to present masc#and like. i bought a skirt a while ago and i was trying it on today and i was like oh. wait.#and before u @ me i KNOW!! clothing does not equal gender!! but there was just something abt it#and recently (the past like. year lmao) ive really been contemplating like. what i actually want out of transitioning or whatever#bc like. increasingly its become more obvious how... fucking difficult that is.#and the more i think abt it the more im like. bro its not even worth it for me? tbh? also like. sometimes i look in the mirror and am like#hmm. this does not feel better than it did when i hadnt transitioned at all. yknow?#like the last 10+ years ive been existing in this state w my body where im basically just. tolerating it. ignoring it. even.#and that hasn't... changed. after t. and ik thats not like the fix-all but its got me wondering if some of it/a lot of it#is just body dysmorphia? rather than dysphoria? bc like. god knows i have that too.#and just. idk. i feel Really Really anti-gender most of the time. would in fact. not like to be conceived of at all.#but on some level im trying to think abt it practically bc if that ^ is my thoughts on gender fr. i have to decide whats worth it#and like. i miss cool clothes. god men's clothing is so fucking boring. holy fuck.#and AGAIN i KNOW gender doesnt equal clothes but also like. i am Aware to the wider world it still works like that#and truly if i rocked up to work/class in a skirt everyone would be like What The Fuck#and i kind of want to!! but im also scared of that reaction lol#AHHHH why must gender be so complicated. i want to lay on the floor#lol there was literally more but i ran out of tags LMAOO sorry everyone. gender complicated. peace ✌️
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A NEW PENUMBRA EPISODE HAS RISEN!!!! TIME TO THROW MY THOUGHTS INTO THE ABYSS!!!! random thoughts and ramblings follow :D
I AM SO READY FOR DETECTIVE RITA YOU HAVE NO IDEA
OH SHIT WILL SHE BE NARRATING PLEASE TELL ME SHES NARRATING
HER DETECTIVE VOICE IS SO FUN IM SO DEAD
why is she better at this than juno this is going so much better than his attempt
‘WATCH THIS’ * keyboard tapping noises* (i love her)
of course she gets paid in cereal i dont know what i expected
oh ok no junos still narrating
‘THE MAN I LOVED WAS ON THE LINE’ (this will never get old for me)
‘my name is juno steel and *usually* im the private eye’ i am enjoying this way too much
ok why do i love skipper they’re so fun?
‘he just ruins the *peaceful vibes*’ so real so real
HE TOOK THE FUCKING FLOWERS I SWEAR TO GOD
rita. had. dinner with them. oh my god. she is the best.
the mother speaking for the grandfather in like such an annoyed voice and then being so calm with ‘or so father says’ is so funny to me
skippers so dramatic i love them
‘SHUT UP DEAREST’ LMAOO
ooooooo did skipper help nureyev?? wait no thats too obvious….or it is just obvious enough to be right????…..no its isnt….or is it???? (im going insane)
‘he makes friends or.. more than friends and he uses those connections to his advantage’ OH SHIT (skipper???? skipper?? skipper kinda makes sense???) (but like yknow…obvious option)
‘watch skippers reaction in particular’ AHAHA!
OOOO ARE WE GONNA GET RITA NUREYEV INTERACTIONS PLEASE OH MY GOD
‘mostly i was thinking about nureyev’ *cue me falling off my chair at the instant romantic soundtrack that apparently follows nureyev’s name everywhere now*
roomantiic moonoolougueee tiimmee
GRIMMS MASK EPISDOE CALL BACK OH I AM NOT READY
‘another love’ ITS FOR HIS JOB ISNT IT ISTG
OH ITS FOR FUCKING HYPERION CITY OHHHHH SHIT
why does this remind me of the monolouge at the end of final resting place (end of the first season)
‘it wasnt a very nice city but hell im not a very nice lady’ vs ‘this is my city. im not proud of it but that doesnt mean its not worth saving’
there are so many things this season that are setting up to be broken (probably not the right word) but like so many things that have potential for a really sad/angsty pay off. like nureyev and slip or juno telling nureyev he’ll keep following him untl he says he doesnt want him to. or juno and missing hyperion city. i’m so scared.
oh ritas so dramatic its making me so happy
HE TOOK THE ORCHIDS !!!!!
ITS THE MOTHER????
of course she had an inflatable couch in her hideout spot
ooooo its juno detective-ing explain-ing time
juno obsessing over detective stuff is so fun
a CoNfEsSiOn
‘im tired of you people…and also just tired’ skipper being way too relatable
OH SHIT NUREYEV DIDNT TAKE THE FLOWERS???
SOMEONE TOOK THE FLOWERS FOR NUREYEV WHAT IS THIS????
OH IT WAS THE GRANDFATHER WHAT???
‘he sent me up to bed early’ ma’am, you are a probably-around-40-or-something-year-old woman
the gibberish is still funny
WHAT HE WAS FUCKING IN LOVE WITH NUREYEV HUH WHAT THATS SO FUNNY
‘we know how this theif operates he grabs you by your heartstrings and never lets go’ yeah rita would know about that with all the agnsty monolouges
WHAT THE FUCK HES TALKING????
WHO SAID HE LOVED HIM??? NUREYEV???? WHAT???
OH FUCK OH SHIT OH NO OH GOD ‘he said hed come back for me he said we’d run away together’ OHHHH NO NO NO NO NO. NO LONGER FUNNY
‘well it looks like my work here…is done’ *very fast tapping of rita walking away*
OH WAIT SHE CAME BACK TO ACTUALLY HELP JUNO LMAOO
awwww they’re all back together!
A TRACKER A TRACKER HE GOT IT ON NUREYEV AHAHAHA
THEY KNOW WHERE THE DOKANA GROUP IS LETS GO
oh ok fuck i thought we were done how foolish of me there hadnt been a sad speech yet
‘i knew he hadnt done the same to me’ OH THANK GOD OKOK
‘he meant the promises he made me’ AWW YAY
wait no its sad oh god oh no
‘problems for another day, i thought’ best coping method fr fr
‘the rest we’d just have to figure out together’ yay ok happy-ish ending :D
okok so alot of thoughts. i’m so scared of all the set-ups for angst and honestly i’m kinda just waiting for the episode that it all comes crashing down and everyones really sad. but also! hopefullness! juno saying that he’ll figure it out with nureyev! yay! i honestly don’t know how the big climax finally thing with jupeter and slip and the dokana group and everything is going to go i’m just really hoping for an eventual happy ending with happy jupeter (and rita there too :D)
anyway! loved this episode can’t wait for the next one with (i’m assuming) stuff with the Dokana group!!
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Hi Mona <33
You're so cooool (and im proud of you in case you havent heard yet!!!)
Okay so exams are killing me even though they actually haven't STARTED yet its just the prep and the stress yknow!!! Anyway you also know I'm very much a slut for Rydal and the way you write him bc uhh he's just so fcuking fine and I love your writing!!
I know you aren't doing drabbles right now but would you spare this desperate and tired soul a few cutie pie Ryda hcs. Just a few smol cute ones abt his soft caring and hnghgnghgng during the high stress school seasons (yeah im projecting whatever.)
ANYWAY!! I LOVE YOU!!!!!
-Clem <333
Hi cutie
Thank you 🥺 and WDYM COOL LMAOO
Exams and exam prep can be super stressful, hope you’re taking care of yourself sweetie. I can definitely spare some Rydal HCs, and I know @campingwiththecharmings @xbellaxcarolinax and @melodygatesauthor have been asking me to drop stuff for our fave nepo baby hehehe
Random Rydal HCs:
Going out for something as simple as a drive isn’t just going for a drive with Rydal. The man puts on cologne and special sunglasses that he says work better for driving but you know it’s bullshit, he just thinks he looks cooler with them on in his vintage and unnecessarily expensive car.
Is the boyfriend that puts his hand on your thigh while driving. Buys you a drinkie drink and critiques your DJ skills loudly and rudely.
A trip to the mall usually means you have to block off a whole afternoon for it. Rydal tries on more clothes than you thought was possible, requesting certain cuts from the retail workers that you don’t even recognize. He definitely tries to fuck you in the changing rooms when the staff leaves you alone, claiming he could make it worth it for you to sit through his little fashion show.
You let him.
The first time you take Rydal thrift shopping he refuses to touch anything in the store. You think he’s mad at you for how little he speaks and how he glared at you when you ask him if the top you’re holding up would look good on you.
To make up for it, he forces you to get a pedicure with him. You thought he was joking but he’s dead serious, his face growing more irritated when you tell him you’ve never had one, opting to save your money and take care of them yourself. He scoffs and essentially drags you by the wrist (why does that action alone have your knees knocking together—) to the salon and picking out your colour for you. You feel quite pretty after you can’t deny but the memory of his face dropping never fails to make you laugh.
Playing board games with Rydal meant screaming matches that ended with the board game toppled over and his lips pressed against yours angrily
Movie nights found you both ripping on the movie choice of the night, commenting almost through the whole thing and making claims of what you’d change, what he thinks would’ve been a smarter decision of the main characters, taking sides and arguing them whole heartedly as if the people in the films and their actions had a direct connection to your lives
Sometimes Rydal would come over while you were in the shower. Sometimes he’d join you, finding it hilarious that you thought he was a serial killer but soon distracting you by dropping to his knees for you.
Sleepovers found you either on opposite sides of the bed or breathing in each other’s skin, arms holding the other close, legs tangled. The nights you spent laying with him were usually the sweetest mornings. Sometimes he’d wake you up with kisses, borderline ticklish movements, not letting up even while you squealed for him to stop. He didn’t let up until he pulled peals and peals of laughter from you, sharing syrupy kisses after and causing early morning butterflies to stir as your heart swelled with affection.
These were extremely random and scatter brained and I’m sorry because I really should be sleeping but I love him so much and I miss him and I promise I’ll work on my WIP soon ❤️ love ya
#inbox 💌#Clem tag#yes this is about rydal keener#rydal keener fanfiction#rydal keener x you#rydal keener x reader#rydal keener#rydal keener fluff#mona’s 1k#stay awake with me#oxford comma fic
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Took me a good 3 whole fucking hours to write that req down 😭😭 and yknow what. At some point it went a little too ridiculously past the word limit to be a Simple Request. 😭😭😭
This would be the equivalent of saying id bring u a nice picnic basket of goodies and snacks to feast from but I accidentally cooked extra food and now I'm pulling up with 10 breifcases worth of things to unpack 😭😭
Brother id tell you to take your sweet time to lovingly write out the fic, but atp I feel the need to apologize for not shutting the fuck up on the req 😭
Honey no do not apologise I will be fed for days I will be weeks quite possibly even months 🫵 the dedication to take three hours writing it down though omg 😭 I applaud you I got pressure now I gotta do this request well
LMAOO honestly sounds like a great picnic but also so understandable cause same I'll be like "Let me explain this rq" and suddenly I've got three lengthy paragraphs in front of me (number one reason I never submit requests to people 💀) cooking too much food for the picnic is so real
Takin your apology privileges /j NO BUT I HAVE BEEN PATIENTLY WAITING FOR THIS THO YOU DO NOT DISAPPOINT 🤞 I was like "Maybe he changed his mind" then BOOM there it is and omg this is delicious food but it also may take me some time to lovingly write this out 😭
Keep cooking brother the picnic adores you and your ideas for the premium babygirl 🙏❤️
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Things that have happened to in Fallout 3 so far as I go into the game not knowing anything at all about it, part 4:
-Using the power of googling because I was getting lost on the main quest, I bullshitted my way all the up to part where you’re going with your dad and the scientists to activate Project Purity. The problem is. I accidentally progressed TOO fast (I’ve literally sat down to play this game like less than 10 times and am already at the final quest.) and when I reached the control room nothing happened and I couldn’t enter the password. I just learned that there is a whole other character whose supposed to be there for the ending and I literally just haven’t even met her yet.
-I have no idea what to do now because with further googling I learned that depending on what version of the game you have, the game will literally just end immediately after that quest. By “end” I mean your character dies and you can not continue the game. I’m playing on Xbox game pass and just have to pray that version automatically has the DLC where you can keep playing.
-Apparently the enclave is a thing but I have yet to meet a single member I really think I messed this one up guys. My dad and those scientists are gonna be waiting for me for a LONG WHILE HOLY SHIT
-My characters entire body except for his head and hands randomly went invisible for a while but it fixed itself when I put the pip boy up and down
-Touched grass for the first time and got drugged by the treeminders. I got locked in the next room they took you in, tried to climb out using the rocks but couldn’t see anything through the trees, and I fell behind the gate which turned out just be an even smaller secluded area that you can’t exit. Anyways I am deeply angry at them for hoarding literally all the natural wildlife that the rest of humanity yknow. Kind of needs
-Blew 100 caps to get into tenpenny tower so now I have like 11 caps this better be worth it
Notes:
-Still have no idea what “pants exploded means” :(
-I plan to just wonder around the entire map until I discover some more interesting locations because I have CLEARLY moved too fast lmaoo
-God some of the “mean” dialogue options are so fucking funny like I’m not picking them but I’ll definitely make a second save file just to be a god awful human being
-Made it to the edge of the map and areas near it and god is the vast emptiness is ominous
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well imean ur view on them matters the most so iguess i understand why u deleted them😭
SCHOOL IS THE WORST!!! can't even have free time smh i don't understand why school has to be this stressful that u are scared to even take a proper break from learning it's actually the worssstt😭
wait by recommendation do u mean like songs shows or blogs?:o or all of the above?:o KEVIN IS SO GREAT SO IM GLAD U HAVE THAT SOFT SPOT FOR HIM HE IS JUST TOO LOVELY AND FUNNY AND EVERYTHING!! eric is one of the funniest in the group imo so i'm happy that u are enjoying them on hwaiting!!!! dude u should stan them actually their discography is almost immaculate (their new ost is kind of 😟 for me so if u ever start listening to them do not start with that) BUT I HOPE U END UP WITH THEM LIKE TREASURE LMAO i genuinely think tho that by looking at their insta/twitter pics u would probably love them like they are just so aesthetic and well i guess trendy (?) (especially q) but they are just so great and if for nothing else i think it's completely worth it for sunwoo😁👍 THE PICS IN THAT PINK HOODIE WERE 🤌🤌 BUT THE TIKTOK THAT WAS JUST CRAZY I HAD IT ON LOOP AS WELL LMAO but u know i think this is a sign that once ur treasure era calms down a bit u should have ur theboyz era next hihi
MANIFESTING U WONT FAIL THEN!!! academic validation sucks ass i'm waiting till i be at peace with not getting good grades😃👍 probably university will help but i have to get in one first ig😭 but iguess i'm glad u are mostly at peace with it now (?) i be just can't imagine how rough it must have been to get to that point😭 (i hope ur enjoying the break from it then u will be back stronger than ever to write sometime in june ofc)
MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS TBH THAT IM GLAD I LOGGED ON TODAY CUZ IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO SAD IF I MISSSD IT JUST CUZ OF SCHOOL WORK AND U JUST COMPLETELY MADE MY DAY WITH IT ACTUALLY (liebestraum anon💕💘)
no bc school either takes up all my time or energy or makes my mood drop so much i dont wanna write anymore 😭😭 but i wrote a bit today so im happy happy happy maybe i can get something out even during exam season !!! also a chat w my friend about this one fic idea i had kind of convinced me to write for trasure after exams but....we'll see how that goes.👁
i mean all of the above i need all song recs and also content recs 🤭 i think i already mentioned that im a big fan of the reveal album so preferably something w those vibes ?? but im down for everything hihi. KEVIN IS THE LOML my affection towards him is the same i had for mark lee before i stanned nct 😭😭 theres always this one member that sucks me in and makes me stan LMAO. id love to be besties w eric btw. AHAHAHA "once your treasure era calms down" girl- 😭😭 i mean valid. ive always had the boyz in the back of my mind so this is surely a sign to stan. sunwoo is worth it❤
the moment i got into uni i experienced the BIGGEST gifted kid burnout like i never had to study all throughout middle and high school so i automatically thought im super smart and intelligent since ive always been a straight A student but uni was a wake up call and let me know that i am NOT as gifted as i thought i was 😎 so im putting a lot of effort to get C's and im good LMAOO. was kinda sad by the fact that its not A's but when i almost had to drop out bc of almost failing a class i was like yknow what fuck academic validation lets just....get this degree and get it over with. hope your experience is different tho bc i was crushed 😭
as always i loved hearing from u 🥰🥰 opening up my inbox to seeing your ask is always a "FRIEND!!!" moment for me DHSJSJ
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i finished jatp today and the level of serotonin luke and julie brought me...unparalleled
#i just wathed i think 2 hours worth of youtube videos of just their interactions/eye contact#i feel so full#so well fed#thank you jatp for making my inner teen go nuts over a fictional couple lmaoo this show made me smile so much#and its partly insane cause im a 28 yo fully grown woman but yknow? i went into it knowing what i was gonna watch#i was able to slide past the teen show awkwardness and enjoy the good shippy shit gdhsjsgaha#some messy liveblog tag#the serotonin tonight folkz!#jatp#julie and the phantoms#juke
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YOOO LMAOO im the one who sent the original ask where i kinda “””vented””” abt niki getting mom-ified, i sent it to you bc i noticed you were on the topic of viewing the fic with a more critical eye yknow & like,,, twitter getting angry abt it??? im sorry but thats the funniest shit💀
yall ever heard abt different opinions??? no??? go outside and talk to someone i swear itll change your life.
And yknow what, the fact that they had the audacity to claim people were “attacking” their fic like,,, you did it on YOUR blog, you didnt go out of your way to shove it into the authors face or whatever. Speaking abt that though i was actually a bit surprised this didnt happen sooner; ive kinda noticed the author is a bit,,more,,sensitive(??) towards critiques but i wasnt really sure until now lol. something i feel worth mentioning is based on what they vented abt on their account, its important to know that: having a backbone ≠ getting genuinely upset and defensive abt criticism.
If you are writing threads and asking constant validation from readers because a small minority of ppl dont like your writing/characterization, that sounds like a you problem bro
One last thing, if you are a 21 yr old adult that is “actually in tears” because someone criticized your minecraft fanfiction go drink a glass of water and chill the fuck out, maybe take a nap.
sorry if this came out as word vomit, i was about to go to bed when i saw this fiasco lol
yeah lmao like. i totally get if ur upset at ppl commenting directly on ur fic or at u. that absolutely sucks. but i was very careful to avoid that? the whole like. tagging system and everything i was Incredibly cautious to make sure u could not just stumble across it!!! bc i DONT wanna just shit on ppls art thats a rly shitty thing to do. i just like. i love pirates. i like to talk about pirates. if someone asks me to talk about [specific thing about pirates] then i will. the literal only way to find the "criticism" is if you are specifically searching it out
#like. legitimately. if u are searching for hate on something and it is making u genuinely upset. u Need to take a step back#i get that it is hard sometimes! ive struggled w the same thing! and several times ive had to like. have a friend step in and tell me to#fucking stop doing that#bc its legitimately harmful and like. just not a thing u should do#anyway. im goin to bed now nini everyone#long post#discourse#negativity
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What is lgau then? A coffee shop au with... werewolves? I'm hooked already
lmaoo not necessarily no. lgau stands for london gang au which started out basically as an exploration of jamie and dani meeting in london as jamie's falling further into organized crime and ended up being mashed up with a werewolf au that i also wanted to write, but both explored similar themes of exploring jamie's trauma from growing up, so yknow two birds one stone. so basically mob/werewolf au yeehaw
it's not fully formed yet. mostly it's just indulgently horny on main and violent lmao morally grey lesbians are Good actually. but the idea is to explore jamie's trauma and self-worth, being brave enough to leave a bad situation, control, the monster narrative, character exploration by.............oh my god wait this is also a friends with benefits au skjgalsdjfas
#asks#anonymous#lgau#dani DOES thirst over jamie in a coffee shop though there's no doubt about that#roman's still trying to convince me to also make dani a vampire and honestly...i'm Considering it but no promises
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it’s admiration hours, my dear sugar blossom! how are you? i hope you’re having a beautiful morning (if im guessing right on this time zone thing) or afternoon, when this message finds you. i apologize that it’s a bit later than i usually respond, i got surprisingly busy today and yesterday and finally made time to sit and reply tonight!
it’s nice to know you prefer tea 🤔 i like coffee too but... i think tea is my favorite as well 😌 do you have any favorite kinds? and i’m glad that things have been better for you lately!! 🌷 ✨ 🤗
omg the thing about the boots is that they’re a classic case of like, they look good on other girls, so do i like them cuz they’re sexy on other women or because i want to wear them... or both? yknow that feeling? so for christmas this year i leaned in and bought them and feel like i’m serving looks on the runway, it’s such a confidence boost! anyway enough about footwear 😂
oh you paint such a pretty picture of your home, it sounds really beautiful! and i think it’s enviable how near you are to the beach, i love the beach! hopefully summer stays at a manageable temperature this year 😅 i can feel the weather here turn toward spring and i’m hoping the same thing- that summer isn’t extremely hot this year 😨 i have big plans to ride my bike a lot more and i can’t do that if it’s 40+ degrees out 😱
oh that’s so sweet, they’re perfect petnames for you too because!! you are such a sweetheart! ah!! and yes, as an aquarius (which explains the theatrics, and the rambling) i’ve poured over these messages to you trying not to sound... insane. you can let me know if it’s worked or not😂 😇
and though it was busy, i did have a really nice day! i got to do some yoga and workout, and cook and watch an interesting travel show with my sister, where the host goes to places that maybe aren’t considered top travel destinations- but he usually finds in the end that they’re all delightful and worth traveling to. it turned out really informative and visually beautiful! it also added a lot of places to my travel list 😂
in closing i wanted to ask- what’s bringing you joy lately? what things/people/etc are brightening your days? 🤗
hi love!!! i’m sorry it’s been so long and i replied so late i saw this lovely message and didn’t have time to read it all so i wanted to properly read it.
you know when u think things are better but then u fall into another slump... yeah. but i am feeling much better now i promise hehe
my favorite tea is red fruit mix!! i’ve been loving this one from a brand called nature’s heart and they also have a box with mixed flavors that include peach, mango, coconut, it’s so so good and i have that usually before bed every night to calm me down.
i’m really glad u decided to buy the boots for yourself fuck what anyone else thinks if u feel good in them thats all that matters and im glad it gave u more confidence bc that’s what counts. i’m sure that they look lovely on u :)))
the weather has been so hot lately like to the point where its unbearable. i dont leave the house usually but the other day i literally went for a walk bc i couldn’t bear to be inside my house lmaoo and we’re coming on to autumn soon so i hope the temperatures do drop a bit. and ohh im happy u get to ride a bike!! i dont have one myself but my friends always ride around the park near my house and i get to see them sometimes :D
about the petnames im super happy with anything u choose. i couldnt have guessed u were an acquarius tbh idk why but dont worry u dont sound insane im loving ur messages a lot hehe. im a virgo btw from september and yeah the whole overthinking and perfectionism character traits.....very real.
omg i love travel shows, whats the name of that show?? i might check it out. right now i’m just catching up on some tv shows that i watch and watching dramas weekly like atots, we best love, lovely writer. but i also wanna watch something on netflix that can keep me entertained for when i need it.
you’re so so sweet for this message and i’m the worst for replying so late but i guess to answer ur question, i haven’t been really feeling genuine happiness lately so that’s why i felt so down. but if i had to name some things... teaching kids online makes me very happy if there is something i enjoy and i’ve been eating healthy and working out for 2 months now and i’ve been super motivated so i’m proud of myself for that. well also i really enjoy cooking, i’ve been trying out new recipes as well so that brings me happiness. and i guess something cheesy like staring at the sunset bc the summer sunsets here are just so gorgeous hehe. thanks for reaching out and i hope you have a lovely night in so cali ;)
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im putting together my summary of art this year and wowee this year has not been great for art. i haven’t been posting finished drawings nearly as much as i used to. in fact i haven’t been drawing as much in general, haven’t been filling up sketch books like i used to. and i haven’t been improving very much over this year. and im not too proud of most of the things ive drawn this year, save for a few. i think it’s a combination of me being very depressed this year and not having the energy, as well as not getting much feedback at all which leaves me feeling very unmotivated. i want to make art i can be proud of, really go above and beyond and make art that looks really good, but it’s hard because whenever i do have the energy to do it, i get either very little or no feedback at all and I end up feeling like shit because of it. im trying to draw for me, i really am, but it feels pointless sometimes yknow.
its funny because i used to get tons of notes when i was in the ah fandom, but i didn’t even really care about what i was drawing much. i didn’t actually have any passion for the content and hardly watched it (i Did really love it at one point, back when i was like 15 and ray was still around) but by the time i was back in the fandom in like 2015/2016 i didn’t really care about the content, i was just churning out fanart because people actually paid attention to me, and complimented my art, and i felt so special? i guess something that made me leave the fandom (besides the people telling me to kill myself), is whenever i drew things that actually made me happy, and were actually fun to draw, like ray, people would get so angry with me, and i was so tired of that lmao. i do really miss it sometimes, all the attention i mean, but i guess now i get to try to do art for Me, draw things that make me happy, but i need to accept that I’m never gonna get that kind of attention again and that’s really hard for me.
anyway enough about That time in my life lmaooo. I can’t even really set art goals this year because i never do them anyway. it’s always “do more backgrounds” “learn how to color” and i never do it lmao. my goal for this year should just be trying to draw more, and trying to draw things that i can be proud of, and also drawing things that i enjoy drawing!!! i mean actually this year was good for that, i got to draw kokichis and a bunch of ocs. i never really drew something because i thought it would get me notes, which i used to do very often a few years ago. but yeah my goal for this year should just be trying to enjoy drawing, which is hard for me, and trying not to tie my self worth to how much people like my art lmaoo
#be quiet marshal#sorry this turned into like a journal entry lmao#i wanna try to be likeee#more talkative with you guys#let you get to know me better#i find that im usually afraid to talk too much or be honest abt my feelings#because im afraid ill annoy people and theyll leave lmaoooo#long post
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GIRL YES!! You don’t have to marry him or anything, just bone him. Beautiful dicc’s are so hard to come by!
Anonymous said:i think it's so funny that like,,, i havent been on tumblr in yearss right,,, and the last thing i remember you going off about is that song joongki lookalike,,, and now years later that i check up on your blog again youre once again talking about the song joongki lookalike lmaoo idk if youve already went and done shit but i say go for it and get that dick even if he cant get you off, im just like you so i get you but sex is still fun yknow
Anonymous said:YAS BITCH HOP ON THAT DICK. If that's what u want, and,if he's bad at it you can always help him get better
Anonymous said:girl if you don’t peg him..!!!!
Anonymous said:Is it okay if your followers add you on Snapchat or Instagram?
Anonymous said:I think go for it and educate him in life asdhflfdk like in bed ;) and other things too MAKE HIM A YOU 2.0 *heart eyes*
Anonymous said:Sis you made fics on how to Dom Jungkook. Take those and dominate that beautiful boy and make him suffer 👌🏽
reblogxmins said:Omg lu was that tWO YEARS ago man it literally feels like yesterday when we would gossip about all your failed sex adventures loll
Anonymous said:give him another chance if he's so hot but also try to get him to be better at sex? idk lu
Anonymous said:Mm, would he like listen if you told him what do or would his ego get hurt?
Anonymous said:girl, just femdom it up. if he doesn't know what to do, just give him instructions, lolol.
Anonymous said:hed probably still be just as bad as he was 2 years ago ://
Anonymous said:Lmaoooo 😂😂😂 gurl just fuck him!
Anonymous said:Definitely give him a second chance 🙌🙌 get it boo
Anonymous said:Get👏that👏dick👏
Anonymous said:Girl i think you should just go for it!!! Life's too short to not sleep with beautiful people when you get the chance
Anonymous said:If you really wanna try with the guy again(something that Idk if I would) try taking control then, like "man you better do this and this to me otherwise I'm leaving"
Anonymous said:Oh I remember that guy! Was it really 2 years ago? Time flies ;') Somebody's already said it in the comments: If you want to date or be casual fwb, just give him a second chance and see if he had used those 2 years to develop his personality. If you want sex only, sure go for it! What's important then is that he treats you well. Bad sex ain't worth it, Lu.
Anonymous said:2 years? If I was you, in he situation you say you are, I would try to give him a chance hoping and praying that those 2 years changed something in him and now he's good in bed
hyungline-hoe said:Depends on what he’s bad at 🤔is he boring in bed? And does he know how to give good head?? If he’s good at both of those things, for a song joonki look-a-like I say girl shoot your shot.
Anonymous said:Omg I actually remember you telling us about that guy aihfjs well heres a question for you, do you want it to just be a fling or do you actually like him?
Anonymous said:You could just be with him for one hook-up and then you both part ways
Anonymous said:If you want it go get it! ✌︎('ω'✌︎ )
Anonymous said:If the sex is good then go for it! If not kick him to the curb
ajsfklskjdf omg i am actually crying. you guys are hilarious!!! ahahahahha ok i will consider it!!!!!!!
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Hi! I just read the reading you’ve done for me (I’m the detailed home definition anon 🤣🤣) and I just wanted to say thank you so much for the reading !!
You’re right, that energy doesn’t really match me, or at least I have been rather acting quite opposite to what is telling for me to do (which is exactly why I think this is probably gonna work for me), I would say... my energy is pretty much the fool + 2 of pentacles + page of pentacles and page of swords LMAOO
Like... as if i hastily keep (on having to) cleaning up my mistakes throwing my energy into diff directions (bc the problems are coming from diff directions) but eventually not really resolving any of them 💀 andd yknow not being too outspoken
I guess it’s worth trying something new? Dare be a little chaotic but not in the unorganized way. Harness your energy and let if surpass the limits you are aware of.
Thank you for the feedback.
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11 Questions Tag
i was tagged by @pinkheichou @tiny-heichou and @salbelni so that's uh...that's 33 questions holy shit this is gonna be forever long lmaoo
Rules: 1. Always post the rules 2. Answer the questions given by the person who tagged you 3. Write 11 questions of your own 4. Tag 11 people
idk if it’ll tag you guys if i put them under the cut so! i tag: @tokyo-ghouls-eat-rawmen @kingtatsunari @bertoltssweat @sluttttysurveycorps @piningmarco @lesliebruhleria @iviarka @softymir @dallyingdivergent @levi-nyanchou @noodlesforlyfe don’t feel obligated to do this!!
1. Is there a book/movie that you’ve read/watched many times? Which one? i usually dont like rewatching/rereading things but my guilty pleasure is snk, i love to watch the dubbed episodes and compare it to the subbed episodes, i love going back and noticing details i couldnt bc i was reading subtitles, comparing manga panels to anime scenes, yknow, lil things like that 2. What do you love most about your friends? they try their best to cheer me up when they know i'm feeling down~ 3. Ever been a witness to someone doing something hella embarrassing? (You don’t have to tell anything about it) uh yeah, my best friend irl fell and literally slid down her stairs when she was drunk after prom last year and wanted to do it again 4. A fandom you didn’t think you would ever be a part of? tbh danganronpa. on my old blog, before i got back into watching anime, i thought their hair was rly...unique, to say the least, and didn't think i would ever give it the time of day 5. Do you have a “trash character” you like? komaeda :') and ouma, i know a lot of ppl rly don't like him lmao 6. Pastel or Black? black, i love pastels but i look rly good in black lmao 7. Pet peeves? when ppl ignore/interrupt me, unneccesary loud noises, lack of privacy, AND WHEN PPL CHEW WITH THEIR MOUTH OPEN OH MY GOD 8. If you had one free wish what would it be? (Wishing for xx/endless wishes is not allowed) i would wish to bring immense joy to myself and every person i crossed paths with! 9. What are your favourite tropes/AUs for your ships? holy SHIT im a slut for AUs. i lovelovelove actor AUs, zombie/post apocalyptic AUs, high school/boarding school AUs, college AUs, summercamp AUs, band AUs, coffee shop AUs, apartment AUs...i could rly go on but i'll stop lmaooo 10. Are you an emotional person? VERY 11. Are you more attracted to popular ships or rare pairs? i dont rly have a preference, if i see a ship i like, it's popularity doesn't concern me c:
1. Whats your favorite book? i rly don't know, i haven't read a book in forever fml i've already read all the books on my shelf and they're like...8th grade reading level :-// my most recent read was more than this by patrick ness and it was pretty good! 2. Do you collect anything? stickers!! i love stickers so much lmao what else...cute pins, and i'm slowly building a collection i call 'roadside paintings' where -- you guessed it -- i pick up deserted paintings on the side on the road. i currently have two hanging up in my room! 3. The last Song you listened to? sir sly - high 4. Do you like Tea? If yes whats your favorite kind of tea? fuck yeah!! tea > coffee, all day every day. i rly love blueberry acai green tea and papaya passionfruit black tea!! 5. Whats the first Anime/Manga you ever watched/read? if u wanna get technical, sailor moon was the first ever, but naruto is the first one i went out of my way to watch. the first manga was shugo chara! i would probably still read it bc the characters are adorable and the plot is interesting! 6. Whats your favorite childhood movie? pokemon 2000!! 7. Your favorite poem? the universe took its time on you crafted you precisely so you could offer the world something distinct from everyone else so when you doubt how you were created you doubt an energy greater than us both -rupi kaur 8. Your favorite Painting? i don't rly have one!! 9. Whats the most amazing thing that happened to you? still somehow being alive right this very second 10. Whats the Title of the last Fanfiction you have read? i wanna say it was something simple like 'roommates' or along those lines, i honestly haven't read fanfiction in a couple weeks;; 11. Write 3 Book, Fanfic and Manga Title that you totally recommend! i have the comprehension skills of a potato so idk if you mean three of each or three total so i'm just gonna do three total book: more than this - patrick ness (rly good, rly weird. makes you think about our reality a little more. worth a reread when you're finished so you can piece all the information together) fanfic: blue bear - afishoutofwater (snk/eremin - i was in tears by the end of this, it's so sad but very well written. major character death & angst, just a heads up!) manga: killing stalking (hoo boy. this isnt for the faint of heart, lots of dark themes along the lines of torture and murder. not everyone's cup of tea, and that's okay!! <3)
① What are you most proud of? this is probably stupid to be proud of but it's the first thing that came to mind even though i wasnt that good, i made it into my eighth grade talent show playing the keyboard i got up there in front of the entire middle school and fucked up tremendously BUT I DIDNT CHICKEN OUT! so!! +1 point for tay woohoo ② Have you ever been so impressed you were left speechless? if you mean impressed by someone's level of stupidity, yeah lmaooo, otherwise not rly ③ What’s your favorite time of day? 10AM - 2-3PM, i'm the only one awake during these hours (unless my mom has work) and the house is completely silent for once ④ Is there a certain song that gives you goosebumps everytime you hear it? history maker from yoi gave me goosebumps for a while but no song has consistently given me goosebumps lmao ⑤ Is there something, let it be a hobby/food/movie/book/song/etc., from your childhood that you still love today? i still collect stickers and i still rly love beanie babies...i also don't mind watching the berenstein bears/dragon tales with my niece bc those were my faves when i was a kid ⑥ What never fails to make you happy? my morning solitude and fluffy art/fanfics of my otps!! ⑦ Do you dream? If so, which one was most memorable? i dream sometimes, but my fave reccurring dream is where everything is neon, like the saturation has been yanked up 100%, and i'm just walking down a sidewalk minding my own business, and then it starts raining acid and everything starts melting away until i'm just kinda floating in the void lmao i usually wake up right after everything disappears ⑧ Who’s your favorite tumblr artist/writer/editor/etc.? Feel free to name/tag more than one! the first one that came to mind was @glassesgirl0401, rarepair mom for life ; v ; ⑨ What’s your favorite fanart? Could you please link to its source? omg i love every piece of fanart tht i reblog i cant pick just one!! i rly love how everyone has their own art style and ways of drawing certain things differently, the individuality is what makes art so amazing! ⑩ What’s your headcanoned sexuality/gender identity/romantic orientation of your favorite SNK character? omg there's so many tht i like aaaaa if i had to pick just one, it would be armin and he's hella gay :3 ⑪ ^May I draw them with their pride flag’s colors for you? AAAAAA PLEASE?? that would be so great?! thank you!!! <3
here are my questions, i tried to make them interesting! 1.) If you had one, what was your 'stereotype' in school? (jock, nerd, goth, etc) 2.) What are your favorite and least favorite foods? 3.) Who is your favorite character from your current fandom and why? 4.) If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? 5.) What are your favorite hobbies? 6.) Spring, Summer, Fall, or Winter? 7.) What's one obstacle you've overcome recently? 8.) Yes or no: Pineapple on pizza? Fries dipped in mayonnaise? Ketchup on eggs? 9.) What is your most resourceful skill? 10.) If you could pick three fictional characters to bring to life, who would they be and why? 11.) What is the end-goal for you; What do you want to do with your life?
thanks for reading this far lmao sorry that took a lot longer than i thought it would
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mothman ep thoughts&prayers
first of all, the windbiter sounds are awesome. I’m not really focusing on the others, cause they have been talked about so much in this fandom already
when Ryan says Wingatron and how it’s a bad name, Shane looks actually so delighted. They do cut after that, but I bet Shane was like holy shit, that’s a way cooler name.
why does the mothman statue have butterfly wings if they’re supposed to be like batman’s??? Ryan you lied to us
holy shit guys, mothman has chesthair........
beautiful amber/ pure terror eyes
SHANE’S SCARF looks so niceeeeee
that sixpack mothman has looks just like there was 6 hotdogs carved into his skin. wait why is mothman a he?? maybe they’re nb species
the way the boys pointed out that ass. not straight. definitely not
shaniacs should all change their name into mothmaniacs
Shane said “thank you” to Ryan when he opened the door for him. just pointing it out, yknow
feels weird/ feels right is pretty much how their relationship would work tbh
BUT THEN Ryan tries to open another door for Shane but Shane just full on goes from the other passageway :D what’s on ur mind boi. he didn’t even hold the door for Ryan :D
I like how they both immediately said that the people couldn’t have made this up for the tourism, but Shane doesn’t trust Ryan’s bullshit sniff test
Ryan just str8 up acting like the mothman. what the hell were these guys on when they made this ep
that pizza looks so damn good tho I’m salivating
Shane not breaking eye contact when wiping his mouth. that’s not a straight
hahaha the pizza place owner trying to push back as much as possible, but still trying to sell the story, I mean.... go full on or go home. Especially in this town.
*church bells ring* “it’s time” - I wonder what this town’s religious people think of mothman. is he a creature of god?
the mutated birds theory is quite cool, but birds don’t act like that around humans.... this must be a full cryptoid
yeah... we don’t want you to get shot. but shane can get shot bc at least he would not die in that horrible yellow vest
are you a beer guy, a wine guy, or a field mice guy?
this... 1966′s youth was... pretty damn hardcore. double date at the TNT, cracking open a few field mice with the mothman. nbd
... some grass ...
the mothman mating calls are just. straight up the worst/ best thing they have done this far. it’s just like the hotdaga. you either hate it til you die or you laugh until you’re crying
Shane’s hair looks like he has put lots of stuff in it this time. what happened lol?
Ryan’s facial expressions are gold. enough gold for a worth it episode’s highest price place
how come they don’t die laughing over their own dumb sounds
how do you even file a report about seeing the mothman? like what, do you accuse scientists or ??? just say that there’s something dangerous out there??? I want to see this report
watch yourself! you watch yourself! you watch yourself! these.... kids
I love that little smile Shane has when Ryan says “he only moves when he wants to”. such a sweet inside joke feeling
and lmaoo, Ryan’s wink after that!!!! so precious
“batman, you’re my favourite superhero!” *mothman sounds* “never mind...” - honestly, this here is why HotDaga is so popular. Shane is a damn script genious
“shaped like a male” does that mean he has a dick?????? please answer Marcella my friend needs to know
holy shit Shane what is going ON in your head. You want people to come to you, naked, in a forest or a field, and offer themselves as a fest to you?? man I am kinkshaming
Ryan crushing that post-it note and throwing it at Shane’s big-ass forehead is great. I’m down for it
“Marcella, where did you get your sight?” “Ah, the Mothman hit me up with it”
one thing I have noticed in the fandom is that people either love the fact that Ryan pointed out Rick & Morty or they cringe. Still, cringe tho
popcorn-eating and freakishly laughing mothman is goals. having the time of his life
this bunker is so much creepier than some ghostly action places they’ve been to...
Home Alone: Mothman
Shane wants to own a taxidermied sandhill crane in his room. what the fucc. that’s. demonic
Ryan looks like a RAVE nun. what more can I say but holy
another good cryptid hunt by the masters of the Mothman Call
“we should be on Animal Plant” hahahha
the last bit where they give Mothman a “last chance”. what is this, holiday sale?
also I was sad to see no ending clip had been provided :/
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