#but yeah this has been a week of sleep deprivation and ants

[sensitiveheartless]

Been having a WEEK — so Howl AU doodle time!

[redhoodedwolf]

A Week-ish of Sterek Fics

Hello all! So I recently accidentally fell back into my AO3 bookmarks and have fallen down a rabbit (fox? eh?) hole that leaves me entirely unproductive and sleep deprived but full of feels, so I thought I’d share all of the fics that I’ve rerereread thus far in the last week (it’s over 75 guys) (since friday 😬). Each has the fic name and description, length, and year pub/finished because it makes me feel old. Also all of these are complete because I am weak and cannot handle WIPs. 

Note: I’m not adding any tags to the descriptions, so make sure to read the tags and ratings on each fic first before reading!!!

Teaching Derek How to Text (and Other Shenanigans) by neilwrites | 9K  | 2018

yo derek Who’s dying

---

I see your 'Derek doesn't have a phone' line and raise you 'Derek has a phone, he and Stiles text all the fucking time.'

The Hoodie by ladiekatie | 1.7K | 2017

“You shouldn’t be able to see me. What are you?” The guy in the hoodie says, the ball of energy grows hotter under Derek’s chin.

or the one where Derek is just trying to talk to the guy at the back of the subway.

Nothing You Could Say by SylvieW | 13K | 2016

Stiles’ second year of college is not working out as he planned. He rarely sees Scott, his job is exhausting, and to get home after his shift, he has to walk at three in the morning. Nearly getting mugged is the icing on the cake, but luckily a gruff stranger is there to rescue him. But now Stiles can’t seem to shake the feeling that he’s not alone in the dark.

Old Traditions, Werewolf Edition by Footloose | 3.6K | 2014

Stiles does not work his Omega ass off to attract frat boy Alphas. Absolutely not. He's at college to get his degree. If he's crushing on an Alpha who never crosses the lines of propriety, well, no one needs to know, right?

Stiles Stilinski, Boyfriend Extraordinaire by MereLoup | 14K | 2016

“Beacon County Sheriff's Department, this is deputy Mahealani speaking.”

“Oh thank god!”

“Stiles?”

“I, uh, I need some advice.”

“Advice?”

“Yeah. So, hypothetically, say you met your boyfriend’s mother and sister for the first time ever. Completely by accident. In the grocery store. And they convinced you to help them make a dinner to surprise aforementioned boyfriend when he got home after work. What would you do?”

Danny paused, and then, “Stiles, you don’t have a boyfriend.”

“That’s not the point! And I said hypothetically.”

“Stiles...what are you doing right now?”

***

Stiles never imagined he’d be in Derek’s kitchen cooking a surprise dinner with Derek’s family while they waited for Derek to get home from work.

Partly because their visit was a complete surprise.

But mostly because Stiles didn’t have a boyfriend.

Or even know who Derek was.

But he’d already come this far and Papa didn’t raise no quitter!

third time's the charm by stilinski | 4.9K | 2016

 Sure, Stiles has a mark on his chest that belies the depth of his feelings, but it's not something anyone can see unless he decides to show it, or unless werewolves suddenly have x-ray vision.

 Which—worrying. And probably-definitely-likely a possibility – if it was to manifest anywhere, Beacon Hills would be top of the list.

 Stiles almost turns around there and then to ask Scott how his visual acuity is but is stopped by the teenager at the register finally looking up long enough to spot Derek. Stiles watches her mouth fall open and her expression—studiously blank but with a faint flush rising in her cheeks—is one Stiles knows far too well, particularly when faced with Derek in all his snug-fitting-jeans, v-neck-wearing, canvas-jacketed glory.

 Stiles is pretty sure he invented that expression.

Ukochany by VincentMeoblinn| 34K | 2016

Derek comes home to find a mail order husband and two amused betas waiting for him. When he realizes their prank was far from harmless he ends up saddled with a husband who barely speaks English but insists Derek is the love of his life. He's also determined to win him over.

only if for a night by stilinskisparkles | 3.2K | 2016

“I’m Stiles,” he says breathlessly.

“Derek.”

“Derek, hi, do you—”

Derek doesn’t let him finish, kisses the words right out of his mouth.

Hypothetically by alisvolatpropiis | 6.6K | 2015

Stiles holds his hand up to shield his eyes from the sinking sun, its orange-yellow light reflected infinitely across the vast, calm ocean. As utterly stunning as the sunset over the Pacific is, especially while floating leisurely on a surfboard a few hundred feet from shore, it’s a mere backdrop that pales in comparison to who he’s looking at.

Derek Hale, whose eyes are their own oceans that Stiles feels like he’s been floating on since the first time they met. The older man’s eyes are as ever-changing and colorful as the sea they’ve spent the day on, a palette of greens and blues filigreed with gold around the pupils. And if that weren’t enough, the rest of Derek is also transcendentally exquisite: high, arching cheekbones and a chiseled jaw, although that particular perfection is a bit obscured these days by his ever-thickening beard, night-black like his hair, nearly shoulder-length but almost always knotted in a messy bun at the crown of his head.

sincerely, derek by stilinskisparkles | 8.1K | 2016

September, 2009

Hi Stiles, it’s Derek. Derek Hale, from space camp. I’m writing this in English because my teacher Ms Grady said I had to write about my summer, but I spent my summer with you, so I decided to write to you, instead.

Please write back. Love from Derek.

Pancakes and Murder by Amethyst Shard (AmethystShard) | 14K | 2012

Stiles' life has been a roller-coaster filled with awesome highs and terrifying drops ever since his best friend Scott got bit by a werewolf. The ride hits a bump when a dead body turns up at the Hale house (again) and Derek's only alibi is Stiles. Which would be fine, except that Stiles' dad is the sheriff and has no idea his son has been hanging out with the former fugitive. Awkward.

The Witching Hour by MellytheHun | 8.2K | 2016

The radio host AU no one ever asked for but I have written anyway because sometimes when DJ’s play several sad songs in a row, I worry about their mental health and then this AU was born

Derek Hale, The Hero Beacon Hills Needs (Series) by MellytheHun | 11K | 4 Works | 2016

This series started with this Tumblr prompt, "it’s the middle of the night and i’m walking home alone in the dark and there’s this guy following me and he’s starting to gain on me and i found this phone booth with a lock on the door and i tried to call my best friend but my hands were shaking so badly i accidentally dialed the wrong number and i don’t even know you but help me” au

Stiles is walking home when he's stalked by a dangerous stranger and an even more dangerous stranger comes to his rescue.

Fly a Little Faster by mirrorkill | 32K | 2013

Everyone knows when you go back in time, you shouldn't step on an ant, just in case you accidentally kill your own grandparent or something. But what happens when you go back in time and, uh, accidentally interrupt the one event that apparently made the Grumpiest Alpha in Town into a ball of mindless manpain?

Well, if Marty McFly can do it, so can Stiles Stilinski. All he has to do is get Derek and Paige to fall in love before he gets pulled back to his own time. And before he makes anything worse. That's easy as pie, right? Right?

You are the Moon by skoosiepants | 10K | 2012

Stuff Stiles doesn’t like to deal with first thing: hot, moist dog breath in his face, a cuddly werewolf creepifying his perfectly normal morning wood with shades of bestiality, and his dad holding his service revolver up against the skull of his bedmate, never mind the fact that his bedmate could possibly be a vicious unhinged rogue omega.

Baby, you should stick around by ElisAttack | 9.5K | 2016

Derek's driving along a stretch of highway when an unusual sight makes him slow down, the engine of his old pickup rattling in protest.

There's a kid standing by the side of the road.

It's the middle of nowhere, the goddamn apocalypse, and this kid is standing by the side of the road with his thumb pointed skyward. Like he's playing at being a hitchhiker.

Or the one where Stiles thinks he's all alone in a post-apocalyptic world, until he meets Derek.

Don’t Be Anything But Okay by skoosiepants | 4.8K | 2016

“Oh my god.”

Ben pops open the car door and says, “Please don’t embarrass me, Dad.”

Stiles flaps a hand, still staring at the magnificent sight before him. There are glistening arm muscles and a sweaty tank top and then the vision bends over and holy god. He has to look away; it’s too much to take in all at once, he might swoon.

OR-

Stiles has a teenager and Derek has a plant nursery.

covalent bonds (Series) by HalfFizzbin | 9.2K | 3 Works | 2015

Derek's a hot nerd. Stiles is a nerdy jock. A LOVE STORY FOR THE AGES.

Disappear Here by AgnesBlue | 28K | 2016

Stiles was quiet. “What?” Derek said again. “My first heat is coming up soon,” Stiles said at last. Derek closed his eyes, disinterested. He knew where Stiles was going with this. “I was thinking…hoping, really,” Stiles said. “Maybe you could stay with me during that time.”

AU in which wounded in a fire that killed off his entire family, Derek wants nothing more than to be left alone as he finishes off his senior year in high school. That all changes when omega Stiles Stilinski asks him to help him through his first heat.

Money Isn't Everything by TroubleIWant | 6.3K | 2015

Stiles slurps at the dregs of his iced hazelnut latté, pretending he doesn’t need a refill just yet. Supporting your local business is great and all, but Isaac charging $5 for a coffee with syrup is highway robbery. He’s already cut his expenses down to the bare minimum, and splurging for foofy drinks is not in the budget. Except that he can’t really help himself: black coffee is plain gross. Maybe I should plan on marrying rich, he thinks darkly.

Or,

Stiles has a huge crush on the super-hot guy he always sees at Isaac's coffee shop, but when he finds out that they guy's an unemployed orphan he has to decide if the difference in their financial situations is a deal-breaker, or just a bump on the path to true love.

So Shed Your Skin and Lets Get Started by halfhardtorock | 21K | 2014

He's sixteen and in the woods on the wrong side of the town-line and he's so fucking fucked.

He knows he's not supposed to run, they teach that to you in preschool (don't run from a Were, back away slowly and walk with care), but they never told you how it would feel, standing alone in the dark with your heart beating in your throat as those glowing eyes tracked you from the shadows.

you and me (and my best friend) by trilliastra | 1.5K | 2016

“Come on, I shouldn’t be the only one having orgasms. Let me help you out.”

“Uh –” someone clears their throat and Derek jumps, startled, hits his elbow on the wall and curses, “am I interrupting something?” Stiles asks, cheeks red.

Derek looks up, sighing. Of all the people working in this damn school, Stiles had to be the one to catch him and Erica talking about sex. It’s just Derek’s luck. He spills juice on his pants? Stiles walks into the classroom; Laura starts yelling at him about something that happened when they were kids? Stiles is right behind them, waiting for his coffee; Boyd accidentally throws a ball at his face? Stiles is at the E.R. when Derek gets there with a swollen face and a broken nose.

The universe hates him.

Easy Alpha by interropunct | 4.6K | 2012

Easy A/Teen Wolf AU. Wherein, Derek Hale is the high school hussy, Jackson and Scott really need to learn to use their inside voices. And, contrary to popular belief, everyone is still a virgin.

Body Language by LadyMerlin | 2.3K | 2016

In an alternate universe, soulmates exist, and they can communicate with each other by writing on their own skin.

The catch? No one knows their soulmates' name. It could literally be anyone under the sun, and Stiles just doesn't have that kind of patience.

chantes une nouvelle chanson pour moi by pr1nc3ssp34ch (dallisons) | 13K | 2013

Stiles Stilinski has been at Hogwarts since his first year, okay. That's six years of experience. He knows how Hogwarts works, how it operates. He's not quite an expert or anything, but he's pretty damn sure he knows this school.

So why the hell have they waited like a million years to start taking transfer students?

And why is he the only one who can't get a French date?

C’était Salement Romantique by Swing Set in December (swing_set13) | 2.2K | 2015

The Triwizard tournament is really about fostering wizarding relations. Ask anyone. Just not Stiles, he’s busy French kissing Derek.

Hogwarts really should teach some linguistic classes.

The Long Way Home by MyChemicalRachel | 19K | 2016

Stiles didn’t plan to sleep with his best friend’s dad. It just kind of happened. And then it happened again. And again. And again…

All that once was, remains. by countrygirlsfun | 8.8K | 2016

Life is only a long list of constants.

Being a part of a royal family, being a prince, has been a constant in Derek Hale’s life since he was born and swaddled in silk cloths.

Wherein Derek finds himself in love with a stable boy who is more than he seems.

Driver's Education by arrowofcarnations | 9.2K | 2014

This is the moment he realizes he can never have Derek Hale – that he was stupid to ever think he could. Maybe their moms made them hang out when they were little and maybe they’ve managed to get along these past few weeks, but they’re too different. Derek’s cool, he plays a million sports, he drives a Camaro, he’s friends with Jackson. Stiles doesn’t fit into the equation and he never will.

Letters by ericaismeg | 8.9K | 2014

“Stiles, this is getting ridiculous. Can you please do something about it?” Lydia demands. “Do anything. I don’t care. Go up and kiss him, ask him to prom this year, write him secret admirer love letters, whatever. Just do something.”

***

OR: The one where Lydia sets up an email account for Stiles to "confess his love" for Derek. And as fate would have it, they also end up becoming friends in person at the same time.

We're One of a Kind (Like Dip Da Dip Da Dip Do Whap De Dobby Do) by orphan_account | 3.5K | 2012

Derek is your classic greaser—with a leather jacket, a hot rod, a hot bike, and a duck butt. Genim “Stiles” Stilinski a total fream—he’s too cool to be a poindexter but he’s so far from a cat that Derek almost feels bad for him. All that’s missing in this love story is some oddly perfectly timed musical numbers.

do it for our country  by HalfFizzbin | 936 | 2012

In which Derek tries to play it cool but Stiles is totally hep to his jive.

Fast Times At Clairemont High by MonsieurBlueSky (MyChemicalRachel) | 6.9K | 2016

Stiles is stoked when he's chosen for an undercover operation to take down a drug ring. He's less stoked when he discovers that he'll be posing as a seventeen year old student at the High School where Derek teaches.

It's Too Early For This by thepsychicclam | 4.9K | 2016

Derek loves his job at the coffee shop, especially because Stiles comes in for coffee before early Saturday morning lacrosse practices. The problem is that Derek is too shy to do anything about his crush, and the situation is not helped by the rivalry between the basketball and lacrosse teams.

A Tentative Truce by Inell | 8.5K | 2016

Stiles and Derek have a long standing rivalry that has extended beyond the Beacon Hills High School theater department to every other area of their high school lives. With the announcement of the winter production, their competitiveness has to be set to the side so the musical can be successful. With a tentative truce in place, Stiles unable to ignore his growing infatuation for his co-star.

we keep living anyway by bistiles (alis) | 10K | 2015

“Oh, damn, my manners. What an example I’m setting, am I right? I’m Stiles Stilinski, but call me Stiles, please,” Stilinski extended his hand for Derek to shake, and Derek took it, feeling the solid grip and the long fingers around his own hand. For some reason, he blushed on the spot.

“Derek. Derek Hale. Call me just Derek,” He answered, still holding Stiles’ hand in his.

By the look on Stiles’ face, he felt much the same as what Derek was feeling, whatever that unnamed reaction was.

“And this little barnacle attached to me,” Stiles continued, letting go of Derek and flushing pink, “is Leigh.”

--

Stiles is struggling to raise his only child all alone, while dealing with financial problems, a new job, and Adrian Harris, the worst boss in the world.

But then he meets Derek Hale, a dreamy co-workers, and what is a terrible situation becomes considerably less grim, when he has Derek by his side.

Don't Judge a Derek By His Cover by captaintinymite (augopher) | 4.5K | 2015

Stiles doesn't care about the rumors surrounding Beacon Hills High School's resident bad boy, Derek Hale. In fact, he thinks the rumors are total crap. Of course, being secretly in love with someone has a way of clouding one's judgment.

However, he knew for a fact that Derek liked books. So when the two paired up for a final English project, he was excited (but also a little terrified).

But you know what they say...never judge a book by its cover. The same goes for people.

sometimes fate is like a small snowstorm by thepsychicclam | 8.1K | 2014

In a coffee shop two days before Christmas, Derek meets Stiles. Despite neither of them being interested in relationships, they spend an unforgettable evening together, but then part ways. During the following years, Stiles competes in the Olympics, Derek tours the world - and neither of them forget. Then twelve years later, two days before Christmas, Derek finds Stiles in that same coffee shop.

aka a kinda sorta serendipity au

should the pillars of memory topple out of my reach by bleep0bleep | 4.3K | 2015

If Stiles didn’t know any better he’d say that look in Derek's eyes is adoring, but he does know better, and also amnesiac Derek thinks they’re married. Which is the only fact he hasn’t questioned so far, which is the weirdest thing.

Just High School by Dexterous_Sinistrous | 4.5K | 2015

Derek and Stiles have been dating for some time.

The only thing is, nobody else really knows.

Tis The Season Baristas Fear The Most by stilinskisparkles | 5.4K | 2012

Scott is hands down the worst barista Derek has ever hired. But it's Christmas and apparently that means something to some people.

Mind Reading Can Be Such a Pain in the A** (Series) by Fanhag102 | 21K | 2 Works | 2015

Derek Hale can read minds. If he could have chosen a mutant power for himself instead of being given one by random, genetic happenstance it's safe to say mind-reading would not have been his 1st, 2nd, or even 96th choice.

Maybe if he'd gotten the power of invisibility he wouldn't be sitting in a senior Economics class next to a hyperactive kid with a buzz cut who won’t stop thinking about dicks.

A Criminal and His Lucky Charm by Dexterous_Sinistrous | 5.9K | 2015

Please forgive yourself.

For what?

For allowing yourself to let someone in. For letting me love you. I didn’t deserve it, but that wasn’t your fault. Derek, please, just do it. Please— please don’t drag this out.

Derek Hale valued Stiles above everyone—everything. And Stiles betrayed that. In the end, he figured if he had to die, dying in Derek’s arms wasn’t so bad. He could at least have that.

the things you said when we were the happiest we’ve ever been by foxerica (ericaismeg) | 4.8K | 2015

Derek and Stiles meet again at their high school reunion.

From Dirty Paws by Surreal | 9.9K | 2014

Stiles finds a wolf in the woods. Well, it's more like the wolf finds him. Either way, he's happy to have a new friend in his otherwise boring social circle.

flawless by bibliosexual | 4.9K | 2015

“I know you and I are, like, werewolf-married, but dude, if I ever met Lydia Martin in person . . . All bets are off, is all I'm saying."

It's not like Stiles really means it (does he?), but it still makes Derek’s hands clench into claws on the steering wheel.

"Yeah, if," he says, and keeps his eyes on the road.

Those Hidden Places by Mimiminaj | 18K | 2015

He doesn’t belong here.

It’s the first thought that crosses Derek’s mind as he watches the new inmates spill into the cafeteria. The kid stays close to the wall, eyes scanning all the exits and skimming over the tables. If he’s trying to get a barring for his surroundings he’s doing a shit job of it, something made completely evident as Lewis shoulders him from behind and the kid almost jumps to flatten himself against the wall.

Or

Stiles is the new inmate at Derek's prison. He really didn't expect to fall in love with the mouthy little brat.

Baseball Pants by thatfamoushappyending (betsytheoven) | 2.8K | 2015

Scott shows Stiles a picture of the new pitcher for the Dodgers, and Stiles is suddenly an avid Dodgers fan.

While You Were(n't Quite) Sleeping by mikkimouse | 13K | 2015

Scott’s mom, Melissa, had given Stiles the basics on Derek’s condition when he’d first come over here a month ago. Derek had been here six years, the only survivor of a horrific house fire that had killed the rest of his family. It had left him burned, half his face puckered with scars, and he’d been in a catatonic state the entire time. Stiles couldn’t even begin to imagine how awful that would be, being trapped in your own body for years on end, all alone.

Stiles had an inkling of how much being alone sucked, anyway.

(An AU in which Derek is the one who was trapped in the fire, and then in the hospital, based on a set of pictures from littlecofiegirl.)

dhale25 by ericaismeg | 8.1K | 2014

Derek Hale is an actor in Los Angeles, Stiles is a fanboy in Toronto. When Derek posts his Snap Chat username on Twitter, inviting people to add him, Stiles gets brave and adds him.

They develop a snapping relationship, and it gets intense.

I Settle for Long Distance Calls by iamursforevrmre | 4.3K | 2014

Derek is the guy who Stiles met on some random band page on MySpace because Derek made a ridiculously hilarious comment and with a spurt of confidence, Stiles had messaged him to tell him just how hilarious it was and they got to talking. Derek is the guy that made a FaceBook account just to talk to Stiles on the messenger so they could talk more when MySpace was slowly dying out. Derek is the guy that changed his text message plan to unlimited when he finally sent Stiles his cell phone number. Derek is the guy that has been on the phone with Stiles at any and all hours through the day.

And Derek is the guy that Stiles is in love with.

You look like my next mistake by Vendelin | 15K | 2015

“So, are you dating someone new? Someone who doesn’t mind that you’re frigid?” Kate cocks her head to the side, smiling as though she just asked him about where he bought his shoes.

His entire body sighs in defeat as his shoulders grow square. Just as he opens his mouth, someone comes up to stand beside him, snaking an arm around his shoulders. When he glances to his side, expecting to see Isaac, his brain seems to malfunction. Because it isn’t Isaac. It’s Stiles Stilinski, the lacrosse talent of the year, a senior who Derek has seen multiple times from far away, but never ever talked to.

In which Derek is a nerd jock, and Stiles is a frat guy, and Derek falls for him even though he knows he shouldn't.

Coaches Cupcake Coffee House by ChildOfTheRevolution | 4.8K | 2013

Danny looked at him as if he were crazy, ‘It means he wants to ride the dick Stiles.’ He said slowly, as if talking to the mentally insane.

‘Ride the dick, my dick?’ Stiles asked weakly.

‘Figuratively speaking of course, Derek looks more like a topper to me. And you, my friend, are a twink of the most twinkiest standards, but I’m not one to judge.’

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ Stiles admitted, finding himself in a weird crouch-like stance that he apparently now adopts when he’s overwhelmed about finding out Derek Hotcakes wants to bone him three ways to Sunday.

Gladiator AU ( Series) by HaleHole (SweetFanfics) | 9.9K | 2 Works | 2013

He looks up at the door and waits. He hopes that whoever it is, they will be go easy on him. Werewolf he might be, with superhuman healing, but that does not mean that he will not be sore the next day. And he is scheduled for a fight.

Let it be someone easy to please, Derek hopes. Someone who will be quick to take their pleasure and even quicker to leave. He keeps hoping this as the door is pushed open. A voice murmurs a quick set of instructions to whoever has hired him for this session. It is cut off half way through by a familiar, impatient voice that makes Derek strain against his bonds. -- Rome based, Gladiator AU

Stilinski's Home for Wayward Wolves by owlpostagain | 35K | 2013

“At least your puppies knock first,” Stiles snorts. “Here I thought their alpha raised them to be well-mannered.”

“There’s a sign,” Derek responds stiffly. 

Stiles, whose curiosity outweighs even his hardest of grudges, abandons his chilly façade of nonchalance in a heartbeat. He jumps right up and all but pushes Derek out of the way in his effort to get to the window, and sure enough when he leans outside there’s a laminated strip of cardstock duct taped to the vinyl siding: 

DON’T FORGET TO KNOCK Stiles gets cranky when we scare him

---

Or, in which Stiles Stilinski moves to Beacon Hills for his junior year of high school and accidentally adopts a pack of teenage werewolves.

Theory of Overprotective Canines by rosepetals42 | 11K | 2015

Stiles is totally looking forward to living alone in his super cool apartment off-campus. He is. He is also very excited to bike to school every day, ready to set up an awesome game room, and definitely over his crush on Derek Hale. Completely over it.

Or at least he is until Derek decides he's moving in with him. And then turns out to be the perfect roommate. And then starts attending all his classes. As a wolf.

This is not going according to plan.

Hot for Teacher('s Aide) by linksofmemories_archive | 8K | 2013

“He invited you to his apartment.”

“To do a lesson plan.”

“Yeah and to probably lesson your plan while you’re there,” Scott said, waggling his eyebrows.

“That made no sense, but you still managed to make it sound dirty,” Stiles said. “I’m impressed.”

The healing touch by devilscut | 96K | 2015

Stiles loses his temper with the rest of the pack when they all make excuses not to volunteer to help their Alpha. Deaton has instructed that for the next 24 hours Derek can't use his hands after he seriously injures them in a magical entrapment. Seeing the emotional hurt that Derek's selfish pack has inflicted on him when they argue and try to get out of it, Stiles volunteers to stay and then proceeds to give the rest of them a verbal ass-kicking. He then takes care of his friend, the Alpha, Derek Hale, while trying to work out what his feelings are towards the werewolf.

Quit Dragon Me Around (Seies) by WonderWolf | 17K | 3 Works | 2015

Stiles makes the mistake of taking Derek’s sword and now the grumpy werewolf seems determined to stop him from stealing and landing himself in jail.

Stiles is not pleased. He’s also starving.

(Or the one in which Derek has good intentions, but little understanding of how Dragon biology works. He just wants the cute mole-speckled kid to be safe). -----

“Five meals, Scott. Derek Hale has stopped me from eating five meals. I can’t believe he’s really trying to kill me over stealing his sword. That’s so petty of him. It isn’t like I meant to steal it,” Stiles complains.

“You kind of did mean to, dude,” Scott adds unhelpfully.

“But you don’t understand, Scott. It-”

“Just smelled so good? I know, you’ve said that like fifty times over the past two weeks,” Scott says.

“This is the equivalent of him stealing my lunch money, right? Thanks to him, I didn’t have a meal this week. Or last week! He’s a bully, is what he is. A nice smelling, douchebag of a bully.”

You'll See Me Again by matildajones | 10K | 2015

Stiles is standing there in his uniform, hair long and hands behind his back. There’s a blush on his cheeks and he can barely look Derek in the eye.

“Hey,” he whispers. He’s wearing the medal Derek had presented to him.

Derek stares. He doesn’t think he’s breathing anymore.

--

Stiles is the soldier who saved Derek and brought him back home. He doesn't seem to care that Derek's a prince or that he's a little bit broken. Derek falls, quick and sure, but it's not easy knowing that Stiles will soon have to return to the war.

Thousand by ericaismeg | 4.2K | 2014

“Seriously, Erica, I could tell him a thousand times in a thousand ways and he's never going to understand what I mean.”

“I thought I told you to spell it out to him,” Erica says. “Derek's has trust issues. I told you this would be difficult.”

Stop Crossing Oceans by greenleaf | 11K | 2015

“There are no absolutes, Scott! No hard rights or hard wrongs! The world doesn’t fucking work that way and we can’t afford to think like that, because people are going to die! We signed up for that the moment we got involved with all this!”

“We? We?” Scott hisses. “Don’t you think you? Don’t forget that you’re the one who dragged us into that forest the night it all started, Stiles. So if it’s anyone’s fault, it’s yours.”

Something inside Stiles cracks, so strong and so deep that he practically hears it.

The Wolf that whispered into Stiles' Heart by ElStark | 9.9K | 2015

Basically the Union of the prompts:

Mute!Stiles + Wolf!Derek + Soulmates/Mates AU

~

“Don’t you have a pack?” Stiles asks him –by then he had discovered that the wolf was in fact a male wolf –“I mean, wolves move in packs, right? Lone wolves don’t make it on their own. I read it yesterday.” He says while they’re both sprawled on the fallen leaves in Stiles’ secret-thinking spot in the woods. Derek licks his face, and Stiles laughs. “Is that your way to tell me that I’m your pack?” Derek licks him again on the nose, making the boy’s face scrunch up, “Ugh. Gross, dude!” he wipes his drool covered face with his sleeve and then gives the wolf a pointed look, “I’m not a wolf, you should have noticed, you know, I don’t exactly have fur and I don’t growl and I don’t have glowing eyes…” He says leaning in to look them closer, “Are you even supposed to have those kind of eyes? I couldn’t find anything about wolves and glowing eyes on the internet..” The wolf snorts.

Aftermath by GhostwithShotgun | 11K | 2015

Stiles suffers from PTSD and insomnia after the events with the nogitsune. He has nightmares, gets at most one hour of sleep every night and has daily panic attacks. He tries his best to hide it because they all have their own troubles and he doesn't want to burden his friends further.

Meanwhile, Derek has made a habit out of checking all pack members every night to make sure they're alright.

Cross a Canyon (with a broken limb) by theroguesgambit | 18K | 2015

“You never graduated,” Stiles says, just to say it. To test it out in the open air. That's... huh.

--

Stiles spends his senior year battling troll-gremlins, taking on an unexpected tutoring job, and definitely not falling for a certain sourwolf (even though everyone else seems to think he is).

It's a Schlong Story by floatingstark | 33K | 2015

"Do you like him?"

"Of course I do, he’s great!"

"Then what is the fucking problem?"

"My dick!"

-or-

Ex-Porn Star Derek Hale has a lot of issues but Ice Cream Parlor Owner Stiles Stilinski is not one of them.

Bad Dog Bakery and Café by Boom | 27K | 2015

Stiles saves an Omega from wolfsbane poisoning. Said Omega now won't leave Stiles alone. Stiles doesn't really have a problem with this.

Beat The Blues by lilpeas | 2.9K | 2015

Derek and Stiles have been childhood friends since the sandpit. When Talia realises Stiles is in love with Derek, she knows Derek has to stop seeing him: Derek’s a werewolf and Stiles is human. It can’t be.

But things never go according to plan.

Red Light's Already Off by orphan_account | 3.3K | 2015

Stiles isn't a hooker. He just plays one on TV.

Noteworthy Observations by LadyDrace | 3.7K | 2015

In which Derek recieves complimentary notes in his locker from a secret admirer, and though it turns out they weren't actually for him, things turn out pretty well in the end.

One Hale of a Sandwich by whatthehale | 10K | 2014

Stiles in bed isn’t really something Derek should be thinking about.

Ever.

Because the person who normally picks Lily up from school? Is Scott.

Lily’s other parent. And Stiles’s partner.

Not to mention the entire source of Derek’s current misery.

--

AKA, the one in which Derek thinks Scott and Stiles are in a relationship and that they want to threesome with Derek. Spoiler Alert? They aren't and they don't.

Choice by Omni | 8.6K | 2015

Derek knows what it feels like to not really have a choice, what it's like to be manipulated. He'd never take away someone's right to choose freely. The fear of even accidentally doing so is enough to hold him back from acting on his own feelings.

Stiles has never had a problem making his own choices, and fuck anyone who would try to tell him he can't.

(Or: Stiles gets bitten by a different alpha, but of course would prefer to have Derek as his alpha. And also just, you know, have Derek.)

Emergency Love by Kedreeva | 13K | 2012

Wherein Derek is a firefighter and Stiles is a paramedic, and they just keep meeting.

gave your smile to me by Sarageek16 | 4.7K | 2013

In which Stiles is a hooker (but not really), Derek wants to feed his skinny little body, and there is soup. Not necessarily in that order.

[galahadwilder]

buggachat laptop fic: Ladybug keeps setting patrol schedules to pair up Multimouse and Aspik, having told Chat Noir it's because she ships Multimouse/Aspik. Chat Noir does not know what to think of this. Adrien isn't supposed to know Multimouse is Marinette; Marinette isn't supposed to know Aspik is Adrien. But there's still the nagging similarities between Marinette (when she doesn't think Adrien's listening) and Ladybug, and he only gave Multimouse his ring bc he KNEW she was Ladybug lying...

(2/3) Further to my Aspikmouse request for the buggachat laptop fund: substituting Adrien wielding any Miraculous but Cat, Snake, or Ladybug works too, as long as Ladybug knows it’s Adrien. As does substituting Marinette wielding any Miraculous but Ladybug, Rat, or Cat, as long as Chat Noir knows it’s Marinette. (Come to think of it, Snake!Marinette/Rat!Adrien could be all kinds of amusing…)

(3/3, two sentence prompts) (sometime after Desperada) “Why would I offer him a different Miraculous, Chat? Did I not put him through enough hell the first time?”

Unwise

Chapter 1: In Which Chat is Slightly Less Helpful Than He Thinks He Is

Fic written to help fund @buggachat‘s laptop repairs. Original idea from @sweetmeatdale.

*

Ever since Max got Akumatized again, patrol has been a quiet hell. Chat is fairly certain he knows why: based on comments she made during the Gamer fight, it seems like being Ladybug and training to be the new Guardian (and whatever else she has going on in her civilian life—she may not be Marinette, but given how similar they are he’s willing to bet she’s just as busy as a civilian) has left her with no time to do any of the things that calm her. Apparently Fu outright told her that her training was complete way earlier than she expected, meaning she has a mantle of responsibility she isn’t ready for but none of the choice that goes with it. His Lady is quietly collapsing, and try as she might to hide it, he can tell. The bags under her eyes are extending past the bottom of her mask, and her shoulders are almost constantly up by her ears.

It’s only been a week, and Chat realizes that if this keeps going on, Ladybug is going to burn out. Which means he has to do something. Her responsibility is Paris; his responsibility is her.

She misses a step, on a rooftop halfway through patrol, stumbles into his arms—he can’t help noticing how familiar it feels. “Okay,” he says, quietly. “We’re stopping here for tonight.”

Ladybug shakes her head. “I can keep going,” she mumbles, her eyes closed.

Chat cradles her cheek in his palm, and it’s a testament to how exhausted she is that she melts into it without even a token protest. “You keep telling me that ‘can’ doesn’t mean ‘have to,’” he says, trying to control his voice as she snuggles into him. “You need rest, Bug.”

“Hypocrite,” she mumbles, lazily smacking his side.

“Expendable hypocrite,” he retorts.

She opens her mouth to protest, but he sits down, yanking her into his lap before she has time to speak. She squeaks instead.

“Kitty purrs time,” he says, pressing her against his chest as he begins to rumble.

She gasps, quietly, snuggling in closer, and his purr interrupts for a moment as he swallows, trying to control his breathing, his blush.

They sit like that for a few minutes, Ladybug sinking into his arms, before Chat decides she’s calm enough to talk things through. “I think,” he says, “that we need to start bringing on some teammates. Full-time.”

Ladybug stiffens. “Chaton,” she whispers, “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

He closes his eyes and sighs. “Bugaboo, we can’t keep doing this by ourselves,” he says. “How long has it been since you’ve slept a full night?”

She looks away instead of answering.

He begins to press his palms into the small of her back, working out the kinks in her muscles. “We need help,” he says, carefully avoiding the word ‘you’—if she thinks she’s the only one hurting, he knows she’ll accept that and keep shouldering the burden until it breaks her. The only way he can convince her is if she thinks he needs it too. “I know Rena would jump at the chance, and Carapace seems like he would do anything if she asked.”

“I don’t want to put this on them,” she grumbles. “This is our job. They have lives outside of—”

Chat snorts. “Your job is to protect Paris,” he says. “My job is to look after a hyperactive genius who thinks she can’t go to bed until she’s personally solved every problem in the city.” He squeezes her protectively, not missing the way she whimpers in his arms. “If that means I have to meow annoyingly at you until you agree to start sharing the burden…”

“Chaton, I’m fi—“

“MEOOOOOOOWWWWWW!” he screeches into her ear.

She shrieks, trying to pull away, but he’s holding her too firmly. “Dammit, Chat!” she cries. “We can’t just have the other Miraculi out!” She shudders. “What if Hawkmoth ambushes one of them as a civilian?”

“What if you’re so sleep-deprived you can’t figure out how to use your Lucky Charm?” Chat rebuts. “Or I’m too slow and you get hit by something I can’t block?”

“Chaton—”

“Meeeeoooowwwww!” he interrupts, then takes a deep breath. He didn’t want to do this, but… he has to go for her weak spot. He knows how painful this is to her—he knows about the night terrors she keeps having, the reason she was so wrecked once Gamer got taken down, but if it keeps her alive and sane he will do whatever it takes. “My Lady,” he says, “if we don’t start bringing on a team I am going to die again.”

She stiffens in his arms. “Don’t you dare,” she hisses.

“It’s not like I have a choice!” he snaps. “You can’t—”

She scrambles out of his arms, shingles cracking beneath the force of her footfalls, and jabs him in the chest with her finger. “Don’t act like you can’t do this without me too, Mister Bug!”

He snatches her wrist. “Not as well as you can, and I think Reflekdoll proved that!” he growls. Then he sighs. “Please, My Lady,” he says. “If you won’t do it for yourself… at least do it for me.”

She blinks up at him. “Chaton?” she whispers.

“I haven’t slept right in months,” he says. Not since Desperada, but she doesn’t want to know that part. “I keep seeing us… losing. You dead and broken and… and I’m by myself, and there’s nothing I can do to save you…” He’s shared more than he intended to, and his voice breaks as his chest squeezes tight. “Please,” he whispers. “At least Carapace. I can’t keep protecting you on my own.”

That got… uncomfortably truthful. He hadn’t meant to share that—hell, he hadn’t even known he was feeling like that. But it’s obvious now, after his mouth ran away with him, that he’s as overwhelmed as she is. He’s been putting on a good show for his Instagram, but… when’s the last time he’s slept a full night?

Ladybug stares at him, her lip quivering, and for a moment he’s sure she’s going to snap at him again. But then she sets her jaw. “I’m not bringing Queen Bee back,” she says. “I don’t trust her.”

The levee in Chat’s heart breaks, and his whole body is flooded with emotion at once. Instantly, his head is in her lap, pressed up against her stomach. “Thank you,” he gasps. “Thank you thank you thank you.” He’s sobbing into her lap, and she strokes his head, scratching just behind his ears in the way he loves so much; bliss shoots down from his scalp through his spine as he purrs urgently against her.

“Rena and Carapace, obviously,” she says.

He squirms, snuggling deeper into her arms. “Viperion seems competent,” he mumbles. “Thoughts on Monkey?”

“Hmm…” Ladybug says, and he can hear the mirth returning to her voice for the first time since he backed off the platform. “Childish and irresponsible. Keep him temp, I think.”

“Okay.” Chat nods. “I like Pegase, though.”

Ladybug nods. “Yeah, he’s pretty good,” she says. “I’ve been thinking about bringing Ryuko back too—she did pretty well against Gozen.”

“Agreed,” Chat says. Then the side of his mouth quirks down. This is probably not the best time to bring this up, not when she’s actually agreeing with him and this might cause her to reconsider, but… it’s kind of important. The rules are set for a reason. “Wait,” he says, “I know who Pegase and Ryuko are.”

She raises an eyebrow. “Yeah, so?”

It’s a bit petulant of him to ask, but… well, Marinette is so impressive that she’s the only person he’s ever seriously considered might be Ladybug, and if he hadn’t seen them both together on two separate occasions he’d still be pretty suspicious. “I thought you weren’t supposed to bring back wielders whose names I know?”

Ladybug launches to her feet, sending him sprawling out of her lap—then she leans down and locks eyes with him, and crushes his bell in her fingers. “No,” she spits, yanking him forward into a suspiciously exact replica of Marinette’s famous Penance Stare. “I am not putting her back in the field.”

He’s not sure what to say. He knows she doesn’t want Multimouse back but he doesn’t know why—he has suspicions, but there’s no way, right? He’s been so careful with this whole conversation, and now Adrien Brain, which is so obsessed with rules and consistency, has just launched his foot through the ground into an occupied fire ant nest. His lungs shudder at the fire in her eyes, unable to even speak.

(He’s disappointed in his Chat Noir Brain as well, for being so excited at the incongruity of her reaction. Even after everything, she’s still oddly vehement about not using Multimouse.)

He wants to tell her that’s not what he meant, that he’s worried about bringing Ryuko and Pegase back but—something about her refusal to bring Marinette back rubs him the wrong way.

“Why?” he croaks, finally. His bell clonks a little bit in her hand instead of jingling. “You know she’s the best temp we’ve ever had—she did both of our jobs!”

Ladybug’s eyelid twitches, and he realizes he’s crossed a line he didn’t know about. There’s something between her and Marinette; something he’s not aware of. The two girls have had some kind of relationship since before Evillustrator…

Ladybug trusts Marinette so much and has never specified the gender of the person she likes. And nobody seems to know who Marinette has a crush on. Is she… trying to protect her girlfriend?

She stares for a second, then collapses next to him and sighs. “Maybe I should bring her back,” she grumbles.

“What? No!” Chat says, gripping at her wrist. “If you don’t want her back—”

“It’s not a want thing,” Ladybug says. “I’m just… not sure she can.”

Chat bristles. “What?” he cries. Maybe… not girlfriend? Does she… not like Marinette? Is that it? “My Lady, I love you, but I will not allow you to besmirch the abilities of my precious mouse.”

Ladybug opens her mouth, but all that comes out is a weird gagging noise as her face turns bright red. “You have… that much faith in her?” she croaks.

Chat raises an eyebrow. “My Lady,” he says, “I only gave her my ring because I thought she was you.”

Ladybug chokes.

Chat can’t tell if she’s flattered or angry. “I remember you were friends,” he says. “Did something… happen between you two?”

Ladybug closes her eyes, licks her lips. “Have you ever worn two Miraculi at once?” she murmurs. “It… does things to your body.” She leans back against the shingles. “I think I asked more of her than I ever should have.”

“Oh,” Chat says. “No, I—no, I haven’t.” He has, actually; he’s wondered why he felt so tired as Aspik. He thought it was just being awake for three months, but Viperion never seemed to falter. “Is she okay?” He doesn’t think Marinette’s been any worse, physically—but then, she’s been running so ragged lately, how can he tell?

Ladybug shrugs. “She’s fine,” she says. “Just needed a good night’s sleep.” She sighs, pressing her chin into her fist. “Wish I could bring Adrien back on,” she mumbles.

Chat’s heart inflates painfully in his chest like a balloon hooked up to an oxygen tank. Even after he failed her so many times, she still wants to bring him back on? “That guy you chose for the snake before Viperion?” he squeaks.

Her head snaps toward him. “You—you knew about that?” she hisses.

Chat snorts. “I saw Agreste with the egg-hood,” he says. “That is not what Viperion looked like.”

Ladybug frowns. “Right,” she says. “Also?” She reaches up, flicks his nose. “Not happy with you for stealing his joke.”

Chat rolls his eyes, jabbing her in the tummy. “He stole mine, My Lady,” he says. “Anyway. Bringing him back on sounds like a great idea!”

She smiles, her cheeks dusting pink, then her face falls. “No,” she says. “No way.”

Chat’s chest squeezes. Oh, good, she hates him. “Why?” he says. “I mean, he may not have been the right snake, but that doesn’t mean he couldn’t be good for another—”

“Why would I offer him a different Miraculous, Chat?” she snaps. “Did I not put him through enough hell the first time?”

What?

Chat looks at her with confusion. She… doesn’t hate him? She’s been concerned about him?

“He spent three months trying to save me without sleep,” she says. “I’m… pretty sure it broke him.” She clutches at her shoulders. “I trust him, Chaton, but… I can’t put him through that. Not again.”

Oh. Oh god.

“My Lady,” he says. He can see the guilt is killing her—he doesn’t want her to keep beating herself up over something that was his choice. “You… he talked to me about that, actually.”

A look of horror flashes across her face. “What?” she says. “When?”

“Party Crasher,” he says. That’s plausible—Viperion was there, it was Adrien’s house, and there was a period Ladybug was unaccounted for. “He was actually hoping he’d get another shot to help you out.”

Her eyes widen, her cheeks dusting red. “What?” she squeaks.

“I—”

“Okay!” she yelps, shooting to her feet. “Okay okay.” She starts pacing, pressing her palms to her forehead. “I—Okay. So, I—I can bring him back?” She does an excited little bunny hop, and his head leaps. “I can bring him back!”

“You’re—pretty excited,” he says. “You know him?”

She freezes, her foot skittering on the roof. “That’s… complicated?” she says. “Anyway, we should decide who pairs up with who.” She sits back down, folding her knees into her chest. “Multimouse might be more comfortable with a more… experienced wielder?”

His eyebrows shoot up, and his stomach begins to flip. “Aspik has more experience than anyone except us,” he says. “You said three months, right?”

“Yep.” Ladybug starts shaking a little. “And… oh, this is—I’m not sure this is a great idea.”

“Why not?”

“Well, uh…” Ladybug bites her lip. “She’s, uh, she’s in love with him.”

Chat’s ears—both his human ones and his cat ones—are suddenly crushed under a burning vise, and his lungs are full of cotton candy. “She’s what?” he croaks.

She looks askance at him. “Wait,” she says. “You didn’t know?”

“No?” he says.

Ladybug snorts. “Come on, Chat,” she says. “You’ve been watching that class, right?” She reaches out and squeezes his shoulder. “I think the only person who doesn’t know about her crush is him.”

“Who did you hear this from?” he asks. “The—the Ladyblogger? She’s not exactly objective when it comes to them—”

Ladybug shakes her head. “Marinette told me herself,” she says. “She just hasn’t been…” She closes her eyes. “Able to say it.”

*

Marinette loves him. She said she loved Chat Noir, and Ladybug said she loved Adrien.

He arrives at the meeting place for his and Multimouse’s first patrol, unspooling the trompo into his hands, and sees Multimouse’s familiar space buns. That’s Marinette right there—Marinette, his best civilian friend aside from Nino. A girl who he would—and has—dropped everything to help. A girl he hasn’t been able to get out of his head for the last week, since Ladybug dropped her bomb on him. A girl who, if it hadn’t been for Ladybug, he would absolutely be in love with.

She looks up at him, her eyes widening, and she squeaks. “H-hi!” she yelps. “Are you, um, Queen Bee’s replacement?”

“Yep,” he says, pressing his fists to his hips with an exaggerated gaze off into the distance. “Sapis, at your service.”

“Sapis?” she says. “Wisdom?”

He grins. “Old Latin pun,” he says. “Si sapis, sis apis.” He holds out a hand to shake hers. “If you’re wise? Be a bee.”

She stares at him, and for a moment he’s worried that he’s ruined his third first impression with her—but then she lights up, and starts to laugh.

It’s bright and sunny and it shoots right through his heart, and he realizes: I am completely and utterly screwed.

[peachychibi]

ante merediem | Johnny

ante merediem 

Genre: friends-to-lovers!au, college!au | fluff 

Member: Johnny / Reader

Word Count: 1,600+

Warnings: n/a

The more you looked at the three-year old photograph of yourself on your laptop, the more she looked like a stranger to you. It went behind your comprehension, the smiling girl on the screen was you. There was no doubt about that. The memory of the day when the memento got taken was still vivid in the back of your mind. 

There was a gathering for the freshmen on your year, all majors were invited. High on being a newcomer, you got this unexplainable urge to attend any social activities that the campus offered. The excitement was so palpable back then, you actually thought it would last forever. (Funny, because in reality your socalled excitement did not even last for any more than three months). You got to the event with the friends whom you met just one day before. They were practically strangers with mutual condition as yours. It wasn't like you were provided with any other options anyway, you were basically a mere local immigrant who knew nobody in the new city. 

One of the things you remembered the most from the function happened to be the disappointment of how disastrous it turned out to be. You should have known better though, of course your expectation would be so farfetched from actuality. Who even thought it would be a great idea to plan an outdoor event in the wet monsoon? The air was damp, there were mud all over the field yet the sun was unforgivingly bright. The event was delayed for almost an hour leaving the students drenched in cold sweat. To top it all off the MCs who were supposed to lighten up the show were just as awkward as everyone. Truly an absolute failure.

The picture which you took with your new friends remained as the only keepsake from that day. You stood up from the comfort of your bed to walk to the mirror. The reflection was someone you knew, a short-haired young woman with perpetual dark circles under her eyes. This, this person is familiar. It was baffling how the girl on the picture seemed like a total stranger to you. Was it the hair? The girl had longer hair, wavy black hair cascaded pass the juncture of her shoulder. Her eyes, they looked so hopeful. The gleam in her orbs were visible, captured in the moment. But it was her smile that surprised you the most. It looked so genuine, she--you looked like you were basked in unadulterated happiness. So absurd. It did not make any sense to you now, just how could you manage to find any bit in your heart to pull up a perfect fake smile like that. At least you thought it was fake, it should have been right? 

As you sauntered back to your bed, you saw a flicker of light going on and off on through your peripheral vision. It seemed to come from your phone, the vibrating sound indicating a not-yet answered call. You shuffled to the desk in a hurry, impatient to know who was the person on the other side of the line. It's 2 A.M. for God's sake, who on their right minds would contact you? 

Oh, your heart skipped a little when you read the caller ID. It has been five days since the "realization", as your friends gladly put it, and you found it hard to act normal in front of him. In your defense, slipping out of your own obliviousness was an overwhelming experience. Realizing that you had been in totally-not platonic-love with your best friend for God knew how long gave off a sense of foreign anxiety. 

For a second, you were hesitant to press the green button. A wave of nervousness was opening up the subdued floodgates of emotions within you. Curiosity won over though. As per usual, you could never control yourself when it came to him. He was your best friend after all, random 'morning call' was a normalcy between you two. Why should it be different now? 

'Hello?', you answered in a steady voice. Your inner self cheering quietly at this small win. You would never let him notice just how affected you were by his unexpected call. 

'Hi', a shuffling sound could be heard from his side, it sounded like he just dropped something. Knowing him and his clumsiness, the assumption was likely to be true. He continued when it sounded calmer 'Sorry, I accidentally dropped my glasses, did I wake you up?' 

Ha, I was right after all. Deciding to walk the sassy route, you replied, 'No, you didn't. I'm still awake which is exactly why I can pick up the phone, you see' 

His chortle reverberated through the line, 'Nope, I can't see it. This is a voice call not a video one, you hear?' 

'Wow. Real funny, Johnny. Really. I can barely hold my laughter', you could not hold back your smile this time. 

'When was I ever not funny? I am the funniest man in your life!'

'Oh shut up, John', you groaned. Not long after the exchange of silly banters, you both were smoothly falling into mindless ramble. Conversing with Johnny was easy. You both had quick wit and an ability to jump from one topic to another in the speed of light, there was almost no moment of silence to fill the gap. 

'By the way, did you remember the gathering on our freshmen year?'

'Hmm? The one on the basketball field? It was on our first week of college, wasn't it?', he answered correctly. 

'Yeah, that exact one! I'm impressed, you've got good memory.' 

He snorted, 'Duh, of course I do. What about it, anyway?' 

You were going to describe that certain day but he beat you to it, 

'I even remembered that it was the day where we first met. I bet you forgot that fact already, right?' 

Thrown off guard, you were. Now that you think about it, Johnny was the one who took your photograph from that day. 

Shit. 

How could you be so dense? That day turned out to be not shitty at the end. You remembered a tall guy in denim shirt, confidently (and randomly) throwing a witty remark in your conversation—or more like a soliloquy consisting of whines and nags about the event—'I agree this is a shitshow. Why are we even here anyway.' Not gonna lie, you were judging him hard at that time. 

'Oh God. How could I forget you? You were the weird stranger who jumped on another stranger convos.', you opened the forgotten laptop on your bed to see the picture again. 

He squawked indignantly 'Hey! You were the shameless girl with no sense of public decency. Your hateful commentary was not very graceful either.' 

You did not really pay any heed to his words because once again you were curious about the picture. 'I only had literally one remembrance from that horrible gathering and it was a picture which was taken by you.' 

'Which one? Send it to me, I wanna see it' he demanded.

'I'll send you okay, chill.' You logged in to your messenger to send it to him. 'The weird thing from the photo is that I looked unrealistically happy ' 

He laughed 'That's morbid, what the fuck. What's wrong with being happy—Wait I just got the picture.' 

There was a five second silence before he continued 'Well, you did look genuinely happy in it.' 

'I know right? This is so weird because we all know just how shitty that gathering was.' 

He hummed in response 'Perhaps..' 

His words lingered and honestly your lack of sleep did not have time for this unnecessary pause. 'Perhaps what, John?' 

'Well, perhaps you smiled like that because of me' 

It would have been funny, you could have laughed at his words. Hell, you could entertain him by saying how he had been right. Of course, Johnny-honey. You brightened up my day! 

However you just could not bring yourself to joke along. Somehow you sensed that something.. something was off. He was uncharacteristically serious. It even seemed that he was hesitant to say it, as if he was scared of your reaction yet at the same time, he sincerely anticipated it. 

The time gap has been way too long now, none of you dared to say anything. It felt like tip-toeing around a ticking bomb, you both were one second away before the eventual awkwardness. 

You took a glimpse at the clock on the wall, it was currently way past 3 A.M. Maybe your sleep deprivation pushed you to making a rash decision or there was a glitch in your system. 

‘I think so, too.’ you finally breathed out the long overdue answer. 

It was eerily silent, your reply sounded like a hush of wind. You were not even sure he listened to it at all. You hoped he did, though.

‘…You do?’, there was a hint of shock in his voice.. but it did not have an unpleasant tone in it. In contrary, he sounded thoroughly pleased by your answer ‘You really, truly do?’

You were pretty sure by now that he was clearly overjoyed, he sounded like a hyper puppy. Weird comparison, you brain that was wired for linguistic fluency has apparently went fried. 

‘Yeah’ you tried so hard to stop your smile. Biting your lips, hiding your excitement—and failing. 

He suddenly cracked up, it was the infamous boisterous laugh of his, contagious. You ended up laughing with him as well. It was all silly, the situation was all kinds of ridiculous. What were you both even laughing about, your own stupidity? 

The laughter died out not long after, you wept off a tear from your eye. A consequence you had to face due to uncontrollable guffaws. 

‘I’m glad, then.’ He said, ‘Going to that damned gathering was one of the best decisions I made, honestly.’ 

‘Why? ‘Cos you got to meet me?’ you teased him. 

He chuckled, ‘Yeah’ 

‘Okay, then.’ 

‘Just okay?’ 

‘More than okay.’ 

[mikazukikannagisjourney]

Taurus Full Moon April 22/23 2020 - with some tips

Hi all, how are you thriving so far? I hope you’re all well, body, mind, heart, soul, and wallet-wise lol But seriously, this “pandemic” has taken a toll on a lot of people, not just those who actually got the virus, but everyone else. I don’t think it’s fair, but when nature decides to make its way after being taken advantage of, well, sh** hits the fan, hard. We’re in the middle of that situation and despite what it seems to be, waiting and prepping up is the only thing we can do right now. For safety reasons of course.  Physical distancing is greatly affecting so many jobs that require physical presence so I’m not the only one who’s losing not just brain cells but also moolah.. Unless you’re working at home and everything is still running smoothly. if so... Good for you! =) I am personally affected by this whole mess of a pandemic and I am not exactly OK with it, and my body is also acting up aka old pains and aches and stuff started flaring up ever since I last posted, April 5 or something? 8? It felt so long ago, because after the whole global meditation thing I started having trippy dreams, so trippy that even if I slip in a 10-minute doze I’d get to dreamland so fast, it was so draining, so I had no choice but to get some rest, which only lasts a max of 3 hours. And well, you know what happens to sleep-deprived people. T_T But I’m doing a bit better, thank you, and I tried all remedies to move energies: old, young, new, not mine, mine, generational, genetic, emotional, basically removing all of the blockages I could detect. I couldn’t meditate sitting down due to the back pain so I started going back to doing QiGong. It helped greatly, now I upped my sleep time to 5 hours. Not the best but it’s better than 3 hours or 2 hours and having difficulty filling in the gap. Other than the sweltering and humid heat, and having unexplainable pains, I think I’m faring better than others. It sounds Pollyanna-ish but I just try to see the brighter side of things aka I used to be bedridden due to intense and debilitating backpains but now I can stand and even play tetris 99 so I think that’s something to be grateful for. 

Speaking of gratitude, the Full Moon in Taurus tomorrow, April 22 or 23 (depending on where you are) is a great opportunity to fill our cups, in preparation for the days, weeks, and months ahead. Because if it isn’t obvious by now, extreme changes will take place once the quarantines or the mobility restrictions are lifted. It is a strong must that we all adapt, because trust me or anyone else when they say that things will never be the same. Yep. And based on the evolutionary patterns of species, the strongest ones don’t survive, the most adaptable ones do, and it’s high time adaptability is given the love it deserves because THAT’S what the new endings shall require all of us, in order to navigate not just the new energies that are flowing in, but the new way of doing things. Like it or not.

So.. just to push everyone (me included lol) to amp up the manifestation urge, some tidbits to assist you in what to ask for. Taurus is ruled by Venus, along with Libra. Venus rules love, relationships, connections, beauty in general, arts, and most importantly, MONEY. Plus Taurus is a fixed earth sign, meaning it rules whatever we have or own in the physical realm, and it’s in for the long haul. With that in mind, what do you think, or feel intuitively need to manifest now and in the next part of the year? Do you want to be healthier? Make more cash? Be connected with more people? Dress up preppier? Create artsy fartsy stuff? Whatever it is, as long as it is lawful, doesn’t hurt anybody (including you), and fills you with joy, just do it. Or at the very least, plan it out. See yourself achieving that goal, or goals, by doing things step-by-step, even if it’s just baby steps. A move forward despite being pushed back is better than no movement at all. That’s the real backslide right there. And because Taurus energy can help you get things materialized into this physical realm, why not call upon that energy as well? I mean, we’re all stuck somehow anyway, might as well engage with the higher dimensional realms. Besides, these are energetic realms that all religions and belief systems call upon because they’re just there, so even if you’re skeptical it won’t hurt to try, and see if you have results.

Oh, and for those who are affected by astrological energies and shenanigans, Pluto’s gonna go back to Capricorn on the 25th, so you’ll either get used to the quarantine thing or it will make you even more anxious. Also, if you know which house in your natal chart your Capricorn is in, you can check it out because it can affect that house again, once Pluto goes back to Capricorn. You might wanna add that to your manifestations and stuff, for good measure.

Warning: Personal Rant Below. You can skip as needed lol I was supposed to start a new career last month, I was super excited because I thought I was going to get a new lease in life but then community quarantines started so.. Nope. I thought that was the end of my issues so I just shifted into “hey let’s max out the healing since we’re not going anywhere” but I think trying to purge as much crap in my body as I could, sorta broke it, in a way? I mean, I was good for the first 3 days of April, but then after the Jupiter-Saturn conjuction and meditation thing I just broke down into more heaps of emotions that I don’t even know if they’re even mine. Oh, and the pains started coming in, and I didn’t take any medications so I just lived through 2 weeks of having pains, which were bearable to some extent until this weekend. Honestly I don’t see any other way out of this situation but to just rest, but having a gene key that makes me wanna die each time I have to stop and just be, that’s a pretty hard deal. Unless I take drugs so I could just sleep despite the world crumbling down. So I decided to purge more, and the pains starting popping out. It got really intense in the weekend, I can’t sit anymore, and standing hurts, and I had muscle spasms and tense joints. Not exactly fun. And it was hard to sleep in the humid heat, plus I kept getting bitten by ants while I sleep in daylight. Like really, the ants here in my new place are so hecking aggresive, they invade personal spaces like they own the place. Just thinking about them riles me up, I wanna explode. But it’s night right now and they’re gone elsewhere so I will definitely do my best to snooze while it is cool before they invade me in the morning. I miss the monsoon rains, where are you T_T

OK, enough about that, now for some raves--

I have been personally prepping up to participate in Inktober this year but also have to do warmups since I haven’t done artsy drawings since 2017, I concentrated more on doing calligraphy, which is good, of course, but I also have to honor and respect stuff I promised to do myself, for this year. I am not making excuses for not doing as much as I wanted to, I mean, I am just brain-drained and my creativity has been exhausted due to depressive states plus it’s too hot and humid that I kept getting asthma even just moving. So I just try to go with the flow and see what happens, I might make an update if that works out. But seriously, I miss feeling numb, I am not used to having to process a lot of emotions, but I also have to respect my bodygraph type (emotional center) and having emotions and riding them all out until I feel nothing, not numb, but peaceful, is something that I am working on. It’s not easy, but I am starting to see some light. 

OK, so there you go, some support for the new moon, or at least, some stuff you can read to pass the time lol I hope you at least got some ideas, or tips, or even some entertainment? I am definitely not at my best right now due to some stuff but I still wanted to post this in case someone else might benefit. Even if it’s read by someone in the future, if it resonates then it resonates. Besides, there’s always a Taurus new moon every year so yeah, why not.

I hope you all keep safe, and healthy, and whole, and at peace. These are changing times, and if sitting still living in the old ways become unbearable, please remember that you are not alone. Just breathe, trust, and move out of your comfort zone bit by bit. Even if it’s not me, someone’s going to meet you halfway. Just keep holding on.

I remain your soul family,

Mikazuki

PS. If you found the information in this post to be very helpful, insightful, and of great value to you and your own personal journey, please feel free to reblog, share and heart/like, or if you feel super-generous, energetic exchanges are welcomed! Please click here and use this email address: may_chan_otaku@yahoo.com

Thank you so much and be blessed!

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