#but yeah ive been mostly enjoying this show up until this point

[spacedlexi]

up until this point i feel like hbo’s tlou has been pretty good at expanding upon pre-existing content from the game, but for me this new episode was kinda mid..

i wouldve liked to see more expansion on sam and henrys story, or maybe even kyle and ish?? (loved that story)(they showed the drawing of them for a half second and they renamed kyle for no reason 💀). but instead we get introduced to this kathleen (?? can barely remember her name) lady who i couldnt get myself to care about. cared more about her 2nd in command guy

sam and henry were my favorite of the original supporting cast and they have to share their time with this lady that puts me to sleep, while frank and bill got nearly an entire heartfelt episode dedicated to them

with the side stories theyre choosing to tell so far i feel like by the time we get to part 2 its gonna be like “we’re doing THIS again??” (and part 2 was already kinda like that for me as in it didnt really do anything new or interesting for me)

like oh my god we’re still going on about revenge and forgiveness and ooooh nobody is perfectly good or bad we are all shades of grey 2 sides of the same coin yadda yadda except now theyre all self aware about it 😭💀

like can we write anything else?? besides trying to make both sides of a violent conflict equal of course because they love doing that (dont think i forgot abt the weird palestine/israel parallel in pt2 i think that was the worst one for me). but kathleen is basically just abby again and unless part 2 is a complete rewrite then im gonna be honk shoo mimimimi ASLEEP

[bunnakit]

my stand in ep 2 thoughts, feelings, etc.

alright i wanted to write this up nicely but it took me... two hours to get through the episode bc i kept stopping to write notes, so i'll do my best i guess.

weird thing about me is when i watch shows and write notes for these posts i always write the notes on napkins? i have like 5 different notebooks in arms reach at all times but i really like scribbling on a napkin for the true unhinged effect.

anyway blah blah reminder i'm just a silly dude on the internet, idk shit about dick, i just like to say shit, don't take me too seriously.

also please DO NOT leave novel spoilers in my reblogs, tags, or replies without some kind of warning label. please? it seems to happen with every show i write meta for and i LOVE that people get hyped but there's no way for me to avoid it when it's in my notifications like that.

some before the actual episode stuff; after learning last week that some of the kinnporsche people worked on this it really becomes apparent, especially in the style of the intro.

the music choices also seem a bit reminiscent of kinnporsche (and a little bit of not me) which i really enjoy. it feels kind of familiar and comforting.

immediately i loved how soft this episode started, the slight stubble on each of them, the way joe speaks so softly as if afraid to shatter their little bubble of peace, etc. i also love that the show doesn't skirt around the topic of sex and the fact that sometimes sex is awkward and clumsy, especially with a new partner and doubly so when it's your first queer partner.

and then the peace was shattered with ming kissing his back yet again. ouchies.

"will tong be at the set?" he's just not even trying to hide it. he basically said 'yeah ur great and all but tong????' but DAMN if poom isn't the absolute king of microexpressions.

at this point i can't really tell if tong is being a spoiled prince (derogatory) or if he's tired of acting in general? judgement withheld until a later date.

and then we jump into this actress being a parallel to ming and OOF OUCHIES MY ORGANS. she's a fan of tong but has to "settle" for joe - just like ming. and yet joe takes the time to be kind, to soothe her worries and put her at ease, because he has a heart of absolute gold. "it's her first movie but she was left to drown by the male lead." it's ming's first love and he has been left to drown in it.

mek's acting is really endearing. this is my first exposure to him (ive seen some of his social media and really like what he stands for as a person) and i'm instantly drawn to his performance. he also pulls off a great balance of adorable/sexy.

OOH THE SHOW SAID BISEXUAL OUT LOUD. A WIN FOR THE BI'S WE LOVE TO SEE IT.

i personally find ming's jealously hilarious. what a little caricature of toxicity.

anyway, it seems to me that if ming could get over his feelings and enjoy what he has in front of him he could be part of and enjoy a very sweet family, as it does seem tong IS giving him love, just not the exact flavor he craves.

the cut to joe's training made me laugh. little oat lore dump but my bio dad was actually a stunt man for movies (which is another part of why i was so excited for this show) and i can promise you nothing like this was part of it. what do i know, though, maybe things have changed since the early 2000s lol.

(no, they're probably not any movies you know, aside from maybe wild wild west [1999]. he mostly did westerns, historical docudramas, and historical fiction.)

ANYWAY AGAIN. with this little glimpse into ming's home life we get to see that he's very accustomed to doing what he wants and getting what he wants, which makes a lot of sense when applied to his almost obsessive behavior regarding tong - and now joe. i did absolutely LOVE linin and her sassy independence (minus the 'i can buy anything i need'.)

but... girl... did you just spray perfume in your mouth?

your actions are strange and unsettling. i like that in a woman.

ugh getting into ming venting his frustrations on joe's body. listen. liiiisten. while toxic without prior discussion... i'm into it. it may or may not be one of my favorite tropes in fanfic. toxic and unhealthy as fuck and i'm here for it.

AND THEN DAMN POOM THOSE NOISES. ACTING FOR YOUR LIFE BBY -- and the SNEEZE AT ORGASM LMAAAO oh i hope that's a running bit for some comedic relief.

because we then make a SHARP pivot into "then stop me" and there's so much potential for pain and self loathing there, for joe to think "i can't blame ming, i didn't stop any of it." i'm sat.

a little side bar, but i'm enjoying the fact that while there is discussion of topping and bottoming as a narrative device there really aren't any stereotypes here. i think on a surface level people would think "oh joe is the top" (pit babe style) and the show said no actually he isn't. love that for us.

"you can even move in haha jk" but the thing is, not jk, because joe would do that for ming - for anyone - bc that's the type of person he is.

[i had to stop and have a lil snack here]

hold up is this wut out drinking with them? OH SHIT IT IS. OKAY. it didn't give us much but at least it's a little connection to him finally. we knew joe knew him from his first life, just didn't really know how.

"i missed you" and when was the last time someone missed joe? not who he's replacing or the space he's filling, but HIM?

love ming's goofy ass locking the door and going inside just so he can make a dramatic ass appearance like he's 'the other woman' or some shit LMAO.

"what's in you to make me jealous?" quite possibly the worst dialogue tree choice ming could've picked.

[joe's emotional well being -45]

[everyone hated that]

"don't be so full of yourself" something joe has never been a day in his life. "you're just a stand-in." he knows. it's not something he ever forgets.

but after all that toxicity we have ming back home, seeking out joe's food for comfort, and we finally get to see him interact with his sister. i LOVE that she knows the importance of being a little silly as a treat, one of my biggest life mottos. we also get to see more of how ming is surrounded by love that he misses out on bc of his own wallowing and self sabotage.

oh, the homoeroticism of sparring with your bestie.

[everyone liked that]

oop- joe is wearing the shirt ming borrowed while sol is wearing a shirt with the word 'fantasy.' i'm good, i'm fine, gwenchana, gwenchana.

ough. sol with too many eyes on him and none of them sincere and joe with nothing but sincerity to offer but remains invisible. oof ouch.

enter ming with more religious imagery to match last week's cross scene. something something the sin of greed? confessing your sins? coveting - idk man, i don't have any religious trauma, my family let me just do my own thing.

but with ming knowing joe's true feeling every toxic thing he does is going to be 1000x more painful and i'm here for it. bring it you fucked up little guy.

"we can't mess with each other's privacy" don't mess with MY privacy. "you can't mess around with anyone else" emphasis on YOU, not we.

and then it's driven home what a romantic joe is, both with his workout heartbreak poetry and this little lady and the tramp noodle moment. this man, again much like pit babe, wants to be domesticated so bad.

and i know we all have hated on ming, that's the point, he's been a caricature of a toxic relationship spelled out in neon letters --

but when was the last time ming laughed with someone like this?

ok im exhausted, i'm falling into bed to read fanfic, but i'm absolutely in love with everything this is doing so far. i haven't written anything as in depth as this since last twilight (pre-betrayal) so it's really nice to feel insane again.

[callmelittlemephistopheles]

Simplicity (Copia x GN!Reader)

Going to a concert last minute with some friends, you think it’ll be just a fun trip. Just a few nights of laughter before you have to continue on with your mundane jobs.

And then you meet your soulmate.

Tags: Papa Emeritus IV x Gn!Reader, Fluff, Soulmate AU, First Meeting, Just horrible amounts of fluff really, Not Beta Read. Word Count is 2.4k

Hello! First fic in this fandom, decided to test the Copia waters with a very fluffy soulmate AU. Hope you enjoy! It'll be uploaded to Ao3 once I can make an account.

-

The concert wasn’t something you planned to go to originally. One of your friends had bailed on the group, and you had decided to go along. Putting in your share, not wanting to let your friends down. And it didn’t sound like a bad time. A couple of nights in a hotel, with a grand show for this concert they were raving about for weeks at that point. 

Initially, you meant to spend the night alone or explore the hotel. But after seeing your friends have fun and listening to a few songs, you decided to use the ticket and go with them instead of scalping it. They explained that the band was going through singers, the first 3 brothers, and then a member of the church they were in, you didn’t press the topic and let them explain little bits, only half paying attention. The Leaders were called Papa, with the newest one being the fourth and who was a Cardinal before he became Emeritus. 

“It was highly irregular.” They tell you while you wait in line to enter the concert building. 

“Was it?” You say, mostly so they continue to speak on something they clearly enjoy so much. 

“Yes!” Another friend pipes up. “It was this whole big deal. Apparently, the other brothers still aren’t happy about it. But they can’t do much when the clergy decides what to do.”

A third voice pops in. “They were Papas too, you’d think their opinion would hold more weight.”

You let them continue to discuss, listening to them a little while longer before you soon head to your section for the concert. Seeing them already have so much love for the band is helping you feel more at ease about it.

Though you weren’t sure why you felt off about it. 

It’s easy to not think about it after a while. Focusing on having a good time with your friends and it’s far better than the loneliness of the hotel room. Settling into your seats, watching the warm-ups happen. You had arrived early, to settle and let your friends tell you more about the lore of the band. 

“Oh, you see those guys!” One friend points over your shoulder, guiding your head to view several people coming out and taking places behind the instruments. They all appeared at first to be wearing the same outfit, but after a few moments of staring, you could see the subtle differences. Your friend’s voice was pressed to the side of your head, sliding into your ear. “Those are the ghouls.”

You blink. “Ghouls?”

“Yeah, that’s what they’re called.”

Your brow wrinkles, eyebrows pressing together as you glance back at your friend, who leans back now. “Do they have names?” 

“No. Well, not really. Fans have named them, but officially they’re nameless ghouls.” 

Turning back to the stage, you can feel the small pit in your stomach. That little form of doubt. Bands had weird little things about them all the time, so this shouldn’t have been too worrying. 

And yet you were worrying. There’s a tension slowly rolling out over your back, through your shoulders until your spine is rigid. 

It felt odd. An undeniable feeling that something was going to happen. 

It only grows when you see the crucifixes, and you glance at the friend to your right. “What kind of Church did they belong to again?” You weren’t religious yourself but the crucifixes didn’t look like the Catholic or Christian ones you’d seen in shows or on the news. 

They don’t look at you, smiling sheepishly at the stage while they avoid your gaze. You have to elbow them gently until they finally glance at you, looking slightly flushed. “Satanism. They’re a Satanic priest group.” 

You stare at your friend. 

They stare back. 

Finally, you draw your gaze back to the stage. It’s more just surprising than alarming if you’re honest. Religion wasn’t something you shamed, you were more just surprised your friends didn’t mention it. Though you supposed it didn’t matter, and instead as more of the crowd gathers around the stage, you settle in the seat. A nice view of the stage but not directly in front. 

The lighting effects start, and a few test runs with the strobing lights before the crowd is fully invested. You can hear the music starting. Strums of guitar before there’s a rift, and there’s shouting everywhere. 

And then you see him. 

Papa Emeritus the Fourth is wearing white face paint, with black details to give it a more skull-like appearance. His hair is thick and growing out, and even from this distance, you can see the silver starting to grow in through at his temples and sideburns. One eye is dark and the other is a pure white iris that seems to glow in the socket in certain light. 

He’s handsome, singing wonderfully and your chest is threatening to burst while your heart throbs almost painfully. 

What the fuck? 

All at once, a chill runs over you, frozen in your seat while your friends and everyone scream and cheer beside you. You can barely hear them with the sound of your heartbeat in your ears, pulsating in your neck so hard you can feel each beat. An overwhelming warmth fills your veins, and you find yourself growing more content the longer you stare at him. Your heart still racing but there’s something more. 

Something you never expected to feel. 

This is rare. This isn’t supposed to happen to you. It’s only supposed to happen in movies or for famous people. You’ve seen how it happens, in romantic stories before. Soulmates are rare, and yet, here you are. 

Staring at your own soulmate. 

There is no other explanation for this new feeling, so much deeper than any crush or basic attraction could be. A horrible longing forms in your sternum, and what had only been almost painful is now starting to crush the muscles in your chest. 

Gasping, you stand with your friends while they cheer, and without thinking about it, you scream with them. Desperate for him to look over here. 

He needs to see you. He needs to. 

“Papa!” You cry, only to be echoed in a sea of similar shouts. He can’t hear you over everyone else, focusing on singing and dancing around on stage. Still, you shout, cry out, because he needs to see you. The thought of him not seeing you, of missing you, it’s already starting to drive you mad. 

Enough to keep standing even when your friends sit back down, the one behind you attempting to tug you back into your seat. The song ends and you scream this time into the quieted crowd. 

That gets his eyes on you, a quick glance at first before he comes back not two seconds later to really look at you. Looking that quickly develops into straight staring, his lips parted and his mismatched eyes wide. 

There’s an intense, soft feeling now in your heart, unable to stop your smile from curling up on your lips. The pain is gone now, though you can feel the soreness already starting to form in your chest. 

The spell is broken when you’re yanked down into your seat again. “I didn’t think they’d be so into it.” One friend laughs, while you blink at everyone giggling around you before turning your gaze back onto Papa. 

He’s still looking, just for a moment longer before he turns to greet the crowd. It’s a quick few words about asses wobbling, and asking how everyone is. His voice is filled with mirth, warm and welcoming. And there are small flicks of his gaze towards your seating area. Constant enough to have your feet kicking slightly while you sit. 

Charming, you think, feeling a giddiness enter your chest to fill where the pain had been. He’s charming. 

And he’s yours. 

The show passes, with constant glances from Papa towards you. If your friends wonder why you’re suddenly so happy and into the show, they don’t voice it, simply happy you’re into it too. But the show is over, and though it was wonderful to watch, your skin is itching. 

Your soulmate is not even twenty feet away and yet you cannot touch him. Not yet. 

A mismatched gaze meets you right after he and his ghouls take his bow. From this distance, they’re unreadable, but you understand the weight of it. Holding you down in your seat as your friends rise. Even when he leaves to head backstage, you still remain in your seat.

“Hey, we’re going.”

“I know.”

There’s a furrowing brow. “So… Is there a reason you’re not joining us in getting up?” They break into a grin. “Did you enjoy that music so much that you need a moment?” 

“More than a moment.” And you smile back at your friend group. “I can’t leave. I have to meet him.”

That same friend’s brow continues to furrow, but another one’s eyebrows shoot up into their forehead. A wide smile appears that grows into something softer, and they approach you with a gentle hand on each arm. “You had a reaction when he came on stage.” A small pause and their smile turns gooey, “Did you… Is he-”

“Yes.” The giddiness, the elatedness in your chest is almost horrible. There’s a terribly happy feeling that’s spreading through your veins. A nervousness too, but it disappears far more quickly. Probably because it all seems rather simple now.

He was yours and you were his. Even if you didn’t even know each other by your names, or rather your real names, you knew. His eyes were burned into your heart already, and any loneliness you had felt beforehand feels so long gone. 

Your friend giggles. “I’ll explain to the rest of them then. You have your cellphone?” You nod, and they let go, standing back up. “We’ll be awake for the next few hours. Just in case you want an escort back to the hotel.” 

The rest of your friends haven’t figured it out, but the one who knows is shushing them, leading them away and out of the theatre. It isn’t long until you’re left in your seat, with security even walking past you. You watch as the backstage crew begins to pack up things, preparing everything for travel. 

He emerges from behind the stage, on the floor, in his sparkly blue coat and hair slicked back. In gloved hands, he holds two paper cups and his gaze remains on the floor until he reaches the stairs. Then he glances up, and you can’t help but beam at him. 

His approach is slow, letting you look at him more carefully. Despite an almost shyness to his steps, there’s a confidence there too, one that seems to grow while he draws closer. Until finally, he hovers above you, lips curled into a small smile. There’s a pause, just long enough for him to lean down and hand you a cup before he points at the spot next to you. “Is this seat free?”

“Reserved for my soulmate.” Your smile is turning into a grin, while he moves to sit next to you. That soft feeling only grows when you catch his gaze and you see the warmth and similar giddiness in it. You take a sip from the cup, just water, to try and calm yourself but it’s hard not to feel so happy. 

“I’m sorry I could not come sooner.” He relaxes into the chair, sinking in. His own sip is taken before he shifts in it so he can face you more. “The show must go on.”

“It must.” You agree, relaxing in your own seat. “Where are you headed next?” 

“Home, this was the last show of our tour tonight.” One eyebrow raises, though you can barely tell beneath the makeup. “I’m guessing you’re not a big fan of our group.”

You can hear the mirth in your own voice, that moves into his eyes while you speak. “Not until tonight.” 

When he smiles again, a wider curl of his lips, you realize you will never tire of it. Your heart is pounding in your chest, and you stretch your fingers out on the armrest. His eyes glance down at it, before raising to meet your own again. Slowly his hand outstretches, tentative but there’s a firmness in his gaze that lets you feel safe to slide your fingers against his own. 

There’s a sigh from both of you at the first touch. Though his fingers are covered, there’s a heat that spreads through your hand, up into your bones. it isn’t long before you’re shoulder to shoulder, nearly cuddling if not for the armrest between you. But it’s nice like this you think, moving to rest your head against his and he returns the notion with full affection. 

No fear, because you both simply know. Because this that should be so complicated is wonderfully simple because you both know and you both do not even attempt to deny it. A seed planted that is already beginning to sprout, to bloom into something much larger. 

And it’s with those thoughts that you realize you should ask something that you should’ve brought up right when he sat next to you. “Papa?” You ask tentatively, and he gives a light squeeze to your hand. “Is that your name or your title?” 

“Both.” He says after a moment of thought, his fingers twitching before he draws them back to lace with your own. “But you may also know me as Copia. It was my name before I became Papa.”

“Copia.” You let it roll off your tongue, tasting it for the first time. When he asks the question in return, you answer truthfully and easily.

He tests it out too with a smile before he sighs. “I will not ask you to come home with me, cara. That may be too soon.” You would if he asked, so you’re a mixture of relief and disappointment that he doesn’t. His fingers squeeze, keeping your own locked with his.“But, may I have your company until we have to part?” 

You raise his hand. In one of the earlier songs, he had serenaded and kissed the hand of a person in the crowd. Now you raise his and brush your lips along the leather-clad knuckles, in a soft amount of pressure that you hope lingers for a while. “As long as we have.”

By the time he’s supposed to leave, twelve hours from now, you will still be holding his hand while he calls to extend his stay by another week. He squeezes your hand and kisses your forehead when you extend your own trip shortly after his call.

With him at your side, everything became far more simple. And it would continue to be simple for years to come.

-

Hi there! Thank you for reading this fic. I'd love to hear thoughts on this given it's my first copia fic, so please reply/reblog what you think!

Also my askbox is open to requests for him while I get used to writing about him. Can be SFW or NSFW.

Thank you again for reading and hope you have a lovely day! ❤️🥰

[sambambucky]

not going to ask about every single one bc i definitely have self control... okay so would you mind terribly if i asked about holiday fic(s), too many white lies (and white lines), and loyalties drafting? or you fav of these or tbh anything you're working on you wanna talk about lol

omg egg yea i mind soo much how dare you!! (tyyyy<3<3) hehehe soo these are the most timely ones you could have chosen.. i could talk about them all until i was blue in the fingers but i promise not to do that (under the cut)

holiday fic(s) is only on this list because earlier this week i got so randomly excited for upcoming holiday season.. and its mostly stuff for prompt lists in 2022 and 2019 yikes yikes yikes. the only thing in there thats passable at this point is based on "What do you mean ‘cook for the guests’?" where sam gets a much-deserved, super soft day off to enjoy the place he and bucky just moved into.

“What’s up, Buchanan,” Sam greets as soon as he picks up, grinning into the crisp air like an idiot. “Hey,” Bucky snorts, “you read for today?” “Hell yeah I am, it’s gonna be great.” “Good,” Bucky answers back before taking an audible breath. “Good, I’m glad to hear it.” It sounds like he’s a little unsure about Sam’s ability to enjoy some time for himself. Which, fair. But this first hour or so has been great, and Sam will prove he can do a bit of self-care., if only just to win the argument for good. “I got you one of those scones you like,” he says, knowing it’ll get a reaction. “God, I love you,” Bucky replies.

too many white lies (and white lines) HA HAHAHA this is uh- literally just me playing with dolls again.. this time to the tune of bodies bodies bodies (2022). originally, the title of the doc was 'is2g im not writing this', then it made it to 8k somehow.

steve tony rhodey clint natasha are having a party and sam shows up out of the blue with his new boo quiet-and-clad-in-all-black bucky. fragile friendships are put to the ultimate test when the power goes out and a body is found. 😱

loyalties drafting is what happens after establishing shot. (the series is called loyalty lasting. im so funny.)

awsdfghjkl; ive def talked about this before, but this time!! the plan is to flush it out for nanowrimo.

the general idea is tws and cacw but with sam as cap, riley as the winter soldier, natasha the fuckboy playing 4 thousand roles, and bucky as just, like, the guy sam's dating when all the shit goes down, i guess.

They’re chained and shackled, but Bucky has enough room to extend his leg and press the sides of their boots together. Sam looks over at him, and his expression softens. “I’m sorry,” he says, “I never meant to get you wrapped up in and of this.” “It’s fine,” Bucky says, finding it closer to the truth that he expected. “No,” Sam grinds out. “It’s seriously not. I – ” He’s interrupted by a commotion in the front seat. The divider comes down to reveal a blonde woman with a square jaw and a wicked smile. “Sorry,” she says. “Am I interrupting your first fight?” “Sharon,” Natasha says, her expression a different kind of unreadable than Bucky's become used to. “Why are you here?” “It’s kind of a long story,” Sharon answers, her smile gone sharp. “What, are you not happy to see me? I can hand you over back to Shield if you prefer.”

✨talkin about the wips✨

[manchesterau]

my thoughts after reading my policeman: SPOILERSS of course!! (ignore spelling or grammar mistakes) (this is very ramble-y and not as in depth as it could have been sorrryyy lol, if you want specifics send me an ask after reading this)

okay...so i read the book in 3 days....which....im very proud of myself bc it takes me so long to finish books but that’s not why you are reading this.

im not going to lie to you...i liked the book. i love angst, and this had plenty of it and i liked it. if you like books such as: harry potter, six of crows, red queen, red white and royal blue you will not like this book. i know many people found it boring, which yeah i can see that, but i didn't find it boring at all. but mostly because i love boring books but that's beside the point. 

the book flowed easily, there isn't a bunch of raunchy sex scenes that ive seen people say it has (i...the things ive read idk what book they even read????) and Tom does has backward views on marriage and what it means to be a wife. but he is not overtly sexist or misogynist or abusive, or subvertly those things either. to be frank he's a scared gay man in the 50s trying to not get caught and thrown in jail. that's literally it. (ill go more into detail on him later). but if you want to read this book i recommend you go in knowing that there will be homophobia (the word queer is used as a slur....3 times or 4 but no more than 5), expect outing, expect not supportive characters, and remember to have some compassion (more on this later).

next i want to go into characters: starting with tom, then Marion, then Patrick, and then the other characters. so if you are planning on reading this book or just dont want to be spoiled them....don't read the next bit.

Tom:

I'm going to get this out of the way.........Tom (who we never get to know outside of the two-point of views we are presented with, and who is being played by Harry) is a police officer in the 50s UK. to be frank when the rumors first went around I was mad like a lot of people were, which is funny because when we got those pictures of harry reading the book before all the speculation we were....happy, that he was reading a book about a gay man. now...I don't care honestly. I could call out the hypocrites (i won't) and honestly I'm hypocritical myself. I use to watch shows like svu (if you were to turn it on right now I wouldn't turn it off) and I enjoyed watching svu. I know and have seen a lot of mutuals, people on my dash enjoy cop shows like b99, or who like actors who have played the character of police before. so it would be hypocritical of me to be mad at him (this is just my single black opinion) and then go and turn on svu (which I don't do anymore). 

I'm not saying that no one can be mad, I'm not saying that the anger people have at him playing this role is bad or not needed or valid. all I'm saying is.....is that I don't care. I got angry over this months ago, and all that anger I felt I don't have anymore, and I can't tell you why. Harry is playing an abusive demented husband who traps his wife in a simulation, and then he will play a gay policeman trying not to face persecution..........and that's that. nothing I can say will reach him, he's playing these roles and there is nothing I can do. will I watch them (pirating of course) yes.

anyways let's get back to tom's character (do not use my opinion to silence other black people I will find you....don't do that shit weirdo): tom is......tom?? like I literally was expecting the worst when I read this because of what other people had to say. but as I'm reading him through the eyes of Marion (his wife) and through the eyes of Patrick (his...true love, fuck the 50s I hate the 50s) one word came to mind constantly: scared. Tom is very scared that he will be found out and his life will be ruined. His family knows about him, which is why I think his father (more on him later) pushed him to be in the national service (where he was a cook, which disappointed him). you don't realize his family knows and then his sister says something and then you go 'wait....THEY KNEW???' and then you will go 'oh so that's why-' 

tom does have old fashion views that you would expect of any man at that time (gay or not it's the 50s and gay men are still capable of saying sexist shit). when asked by Patrick if women should still work after having a kid he said no it's the men's job to provide, Marion said she would like to keep working, he said no when they do have a baby (they literally never did, and idk why he thought he could be intimate with her for that long to produce a baby lol). that's....the most sexist thing he said in the whole book (there maybe some small things im forgetting but nothing that really stood out). that's it. I know it's not small and that was a legitimate issue in the 50s but yeah. Just in case you were apprehensive about Tom's character being a raging woman-hater, no,....he just wasn't a true feminist yet (???? I don't know that's like..the most this book says about an issue women were facing at this time). It's still bad what he said (you'll see how Marion justifies it in the book and both Patrick and her don't agree and try and challenge him on his view).

i dont want to go too in depth but it is very obvious from the beginning he has no and i mean ZEROOOO interest in her at all (you can tell when it hits him that he needs a wife and he starts to act a littleee different but it's not romantic at alll). 

i feel like my review on tom is shit but like!! we don't really get to know him without bias from Patrick and Marion. I think Harry will play a wonderful Tom (even tho he doesn't not fit the description for Tom...at all....like at alllll).

To summarize Tom: very scared gay man from the 50s who is trying to do everything he can to not be found out. his family knows, even he knew at a young age, and yes he does quit being a police officer but it doesn't happen as soon as id like but then again he wasn't one for that long if you pay attention to the years.

Marion:

😑 

i just...if yall could see the notes i made on her.....

To summarize Marion: SHE IS LIVING IN LALA LAND, TOM LITERALLY SHOWS HER NO ROMANTIC INTEREST AT ALLL, AND WHEN SHE METS PATRICK FOR THE FIRST TIME SHE FREAKING NOTICES THAT HE'S ALL BLUSH-Y AND SHIT LIKE...GIRL.....

this is a note i wrote that sums up her and tom's relationship (which is more like friends then anything romantic i mean god their honeymoon was horrible and he proposed to her....nvm 😑)

listen...i can't lie and say i didn't feel sorry for her up until the end when she (spoilers: she outs patrick to his employer which ends up with him getting arrested). after that...ive never hated a character more in my fucking LIFEEEE like oh my god i was pissed

all she does is have fantasies about him being romantic with her (holding hands, hugging, etc) and none of them come true...BECAUSE HES GAYYYYYY i really....the author could have done a better job because there were so many damn red flags.

she's fucking annoying and whiny and yeah it sucked to be a woman in the 50s but you literally outed someone your husband was in love with and thought that you could just go back to being married like he's not devastated and instead of telling what you did you stayed unhappy and made your husband thing that at any point they were coming for him too.......*****

Patrick:

PATRICKKKKK

Patrick and tom deserved a fighting fucking chance i hate the fuck 50s fuck you 50s!!!! I absolutely LOVEDDD his pov and seeing Tom through his pov like it was just so damn refreshing seeing the world through his eyes and how he navigates his queerness in the society they live in. (the dichotomy between a proud gay man and a scared maybe proud but fear overrules that (talking about Tom here) gay man).

There was a lot more to say on how gay men were being persecuted at this time than how women were treated in this particular book. There were some little things here and there about what was expected of Marion as a wife and of a girl/woman at that time but it wasn't the focus.

I loved seeing the way Patrick navigated through his world of art and creativity. And how Tom seemed to fit right in with him.

I hate the things the author made Patrick go through (outed, sent to prison, stripped of his job, and later on in the present day he has had 2 strokes in his 70s). it felt a bit much but it's not too distracting (Patricks pov takes place in the past as he writes in his journal). 

Patrick and Julia (more on her later) are my two favorites in the whole book (Tom is third bc he's a very multi-facted character, Marion is not even on the list) and I wish we got a lot more of Patrick's pov.

Other characters!! (speed round bc this is wayyy too long):

Syvlie (Tom's sister): SYVLIEEE IM MAD AT YOUU I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU WHYY WHYYY

Julia: JULIAAAAA QUEEENNN (you'll see why i love her at the end) 

Tom's parents: his father is abusive point-blank. or at least i think he's abusive (verbally). as im writing this i am now realizing that the way Tom's mom reacts to him (sometimes crying) is bc they knew he was gay omg wow.

tom's dad is very much a man's man guy?? Picture a sexist man from the 50s....now picture him with a gay son.....yeah, I'm not surprised Tom went into national service then to the police force. you can tell he didn't want anyone to find out about Tom so he pushed him to do what he thought best and Tom went with it, scared. 

overall: please do not go into this book expected things to be all flowers and rainbows...this is a book about two gay men in the 50s yall.....

there is something to be said about the tragedy that is in a lot of queer stories, I'm more interested in how white these stories are (that's a rant for another time). but I don't mind my policeman, and i think stories like this should be told. because this actually happened (here is a link to em forster's story where the author takes inspiration from, he really had an affair with a policeman!!! who had a wife!!!).

the ending is bittersweet, and i couldn't help but curse for what could have been. Marion could have not outed Patrick (which she instantly regretted), she could have gotten a divorce (she even contemplated it), they could have been more secretive, Julia could have not said what she said. I think Patrick and Tom were sadly doomed from the start, I just wish they had more time together because I loved seeing their love (the little glimpse we got) bloom into something bigger than them.

thank you for reading!! here are random screenshots of my notes as i read this lol enjoy!!

can’t*

[coolthudethecoolest]

So I heard something about a Fred rewrite in the tags of that one post? I am here for a Fred analysis if nothing else

OH YEAH THAT yeah I have a Fred rewrite in a doc that also adds details to like the inmates and shit if you want I could DM it to ya if you're that interested. Its more of a backstory than a rewrite idk

Anyways I'm just gonna summarize it here tw for physical abuse, child abuse, themes of war, and neglect

Basically Fred's parents were pretty wealthy and pretty well liked. They owned a museum that archived a bunch of Napoleon shit. One distinct thing they did was do plays that reenacted certain events in Napoleons life. Fred was forced to be a part of these plays and he hated them, due to the overstimulating amounts of noise. Unfortunately, Fred's parents did not have patience to accommodate for his needs so if Fred didn't do it, Fred's dad would beat or threaten to beat him while his mother would gaslight him and show disappointment. This led to Fred not only developing DID but also gain extreme amounts of difficulty with talking about his feelings and fear of asking for much needed accommodations because he doesn't want to be a burden. (I imagine he never got diagnosed for his mental conditions and he never talked about them with his parents because of y'know them being awful and shit. I think this is also fueled by Fred already having Treacher Collins and like scoliosis or chronic pain or some shit and he just didn't want to "inconvenience" his parents more than he already does.)

Time passes by and Fred's parents didn't support Fred's desire to go to medical school and become a nurse, thinking that it was too "soft" of a career to have. Ironically, they were fine with Fred gaining a calligraphy degree, which he used to get his parents off his back until he could get a medical degree next while also doing something he actually liked doing. Later on Fred becomes the head orderly for Thorny Towers and things are looking kinda bright. He was well liked among the patients and he enjoyed doing his job too, hell, he loved it. However things started to turn bleak once he realized the most of the nurses were neglectful towards the patients and didn't care about their job one bit. Fred, being the kind person he is, overworked himself because he was trying to clean up after the other nurses' messes. Sometimes he couldn't clean up everything because he was so exhausted physically and emotionally and lets just say, Fred ended up seeing some terrible fates that the neglect towards the patients led to. Additionally he was doing therapy with Crispin and the consistent losing at Waterloo-O ended up triggering him a lot. Both of these factors led to Fred developing a delusion where he thought he was a war general and there were was a big war going on and he was responsible for every death caused by it. It also caused Fred to split Napoleon, which was caused by the pent up rage he had for his entire life (losing at the board game so much was the breaking point).

Thats pretty much the backstory I wrote for him summarized there's a bit more but I don't wanna write it rn because I want to go to bed because Ive been sleeping like shit recently. I might rant about how fred still wears the straightjacket after beating Napoleon and what that could mean tomorrow but its a lil uncertain. Okay I will include one silly lil fun hc as a lil dessert for you reading all of this: Alongside doing calligraphy, Fred also likes to draw from time to time! Fred isn't bad at drawing, and he draws in this fun geometric minimalist-esque art style with lots of circles and everything looks like the fucking white rabbits from the shaun tan illustrations for the rabbits. Also LOVES geography, but mostly likes looking at the maps and drawing them too. The guys got an impressingly steady hand and the guy just loves fucking around with compasses.

[floralkittygambler]

Based on the new signed work for hazbin

looks like shitty h/skerd/st may end up canon, even though once again husk looks uncomfortable and pissed off by angel, but you cant literally criticise angel without the whole fucking fandom and even staff get pissy with you. accept that not everyones gonna love him, and folks like me whove been victims to these sorts *really* dont fucking like him (to be clear, his predatory nature of not accepting husk saying no but magically accepting other's no, incl alastors. also he tried to force a kiss from husk, similar to how his boss does to him so theres no fucking excuses. its disgusting and male victims of sex crimes are fucking valid, so stop excusing angels actions. he didnt deserve to be a victim but hes not doing favours by making a victim out of husk. its clear harassment. not cute or tsundere either, vile fujoshis-). but most relate or love angel so validate this shit, much like viv and her staff and vas. revolting. he also gives sw a bad name when hes fucking harassing folks bc sw isnt like that - you dont just harass someone. nor is sex your entire identity.

ugh fed up man. im starting to enjoy this fandom so little yet the few characters i am attached to keep me around. hell ive said before ive been around husk like people and they often really dislike angel types, whereas angel types adore them rather shallowly tbh. yeah but honestly this fandom and the clowns running it will find an excuse for angel and avoid those actually affected as always. big surprise...

husk physically resembles angels brother, dad and client, and is similar to the first two. its this toxic bond of angel wanting that love he never got from them. basic science. plus both addicts and one being older than his fuckin dad means realistically it wouldnt work. love does not cure everything nor should be pushed to. ones uncomfortably forced into it, and his bonding moments makes husk ooc because hes portrayed totally different to how he would be. again, experience. overall we get enough of this toxic, forced shit in media. just stop.

angel needs to sort his own shit before being with a guy. and then he needs to be with a guy on his level, around his age and mentality whos in a healthy spot. someone similar to him. hell a male cherri bomb would suit. as for husk, he needs a lot more work thatll take far longer. he needs to love himself and work through his own shit and be like that for awhile first. seen it first hand kill so

before anyone goes 'its fiction' yeah? well then explain how shit like many toxic ideals in romcoms or hell, how male victims of sex crimes are treated as a fucking joke still when its not funny, or hey how about that the only chemistry is this bitter distaste and onesidedness thats shallow af. or how shit like 'killing stalking' and whatnot are seen as cute romances by fans very similar to the point its this sorta dumb shit people romanticise, fantasize and normalise - young people. hell adults too esp immature ones.

its not healthy.

its really not.

and being on the receiving end makes you sick to your stomach and paranoid on others intentions for you.

every glance or touch is an attack. every remark, a hidden message. thats what we're left with.

as for the blokes, they get the extra of being a 'joke' and not a 'real man', that they should 'enjoy' it.

fuck off

also to grow you need to accept not everyone will like or love you. angel irl and in fiction seems mostly adored whether its shallow or not. making a character that dislikes him be his lover is a shit cop out and bad writing just like helluva. we get it, he hates rejection. dont we all. but no one grows without it. hell angel wold benefit from a guy telling him no and sticking to that for him to just accept.

because media shows that fandoms and celebs are now littered full of spoilt folks getting their own ways, seeing any critique or disinterest as 'hate' and being the most entitled buncha twats going. not everyones going to love you or care and that doesnt mean theyre a hater. if viv actually wants a likeable character with flaws to grow, she'd actually show angel's bad as not just him being a fucking victim as its just a mix of victim blaming and entitlement to get what he wants for being a victim when life aint fair. show him with traits more widely despicable thatll shock fans. actually show him accepting people not liking him and being ok rather than forcing himself on them until they do. fucking disgusting. though everyone thinks thats cute. bloody weird-

just like his creator, he wont grow and improve. theyve hired a fucking r'pe fetisher for gods sake. the whole viv and hired folks are a mess...

[shihalyfie]

How would you describe the relationship between each respective goggleboy and 'rival'? Ive seen different interpretations but im curious what you think! Not to mention that the fans are sometimes arguing over who the 'rival' actually is, like with Daisuke where some people say its Ken and others say its Takeru. (I dont think there are actual rivals in the show, except for maybe Manga!Kiriha who outright says he will be just that with Taiki.)

One thing to keep in mind is that the word "rival" has kind of integrated itself into anime lingo as a full-on English loanword, so it comes from expectations of anime tropes more than anything. While even official staff has used that word in talking about Digimon, as you say, it never really fit to begin with, because not only has Digimon TV anime never been a particularly conventional shounen series in many ways, that term was also mostly coined in light of series where that term made a lot more sense. As in, they were more likely to be actually competing over something (in sports, or something tournament-based like card games); in that sense, a "rival" would be someone who might be antagonistic by being on the other side of the field, but would have a mutually positive relationship with the other person overall because the competitiveness would keep both of them on their toes and allow both of them to improve together. Digimon is not the first time this term has started getting overapplied to contexts where it doesn't really fit at all (it's been going on in Super Sentai for years), so people generally have a greater perception of it broadly meaning "two characters who have differing opinions on how something should be done due to their differing personalities, and sometimes fight over it", but in Digimon especially, it really does seem like trying to smash a square peg into a round hole.

The short answer: Xros Wars is probably the only one you can make a real argument for.

The long answer, in detail:

Adventure: I cannot emphasize enough that Adventure, being a series that was really big on that whole trope subversion thing, is a series that casts the trope of "rivalry" as "getting in a lot of fights" as a bad thing -- it's actually pretty unsubtle about it, because the word "rival" itself is explicitly used in Adventure episode 44, by Jureimon trying to manipulate Yamato. Or, in other words, "hey, if you saw someone who's supposed to be your supportive friend as someone you had to constantly compete against for no good reason, wouldn't that be really messed up?" Adventure does not even bother with or remotely believe in the idea that fighting somehow is a sign of how good friends you are, at least, not as long as that fighting is a sign of genuine hostility and refusal to communicate (which is why Yamato punching Taichi in 02 doesn't count). Every time Taichi and Yamato got in a fight back in Adventure, it was heated and ugly, and everyone in their presence was horrified, and once they sorted out their issues in Adventure, their appearances in 02 and Kizuna involved properly talking things out and making an active attempt to understand each other's feelings. There's a bit of bickering between them due to said opposing personalities, but it's never over anything serious (see the contrast in Kizuna between them having a bit of a minor row at the beginning, but high-fiving right after and spending the rest of the movie practically counseling each other).

02: Straight-up does not exist. Daisuke may have seen Takeru in that way due to the Hikari issue at first, but he was really running in circles getting absolutely nowhere about it, Takeru was mostly like "okay, you have fun with that," their only major argument about anything was the very serious issue in 02 episode 11, and it still resulted in Daisuke trying to understand Takeru's feelings. I think all of it boils down to Daisuke himself just not having that kind of personality to begin with, because he's friendly and supportive before anything else, and the whole thing with Takeru became a non-issue after a fashion (way before we even get into Kizuna, at that). Ken has the word "rival" sometimes applied to him in official franchise media, but nobody ever believes it. Sure, Daisuke and Ken have fairly complementary personalities, but they seem to both be aware of this fact and actively using it to help each other. It's very, very, very hard to imagine them ever getting into any kind of fight the way Taichi and Yamato used to in Adventure. It's just not happening! They're "best friends" who enjoy each other's company and actively hang out, and...yeah, that's it.

Tamers: Also does not exist! I know a lot of people really try to say it's Ruki because she's the one with the lone-wolf attitude and aggravated Takato at first, but my impression of Takato's attitude with her wasn't out of any competition but more that he'd like it if she didn't try to pick fights with him. Which she does actually stop after a while, mind you, and you could even make an argument that she's more of a foil to Jian than Takato, because Jian's the one who was completely pacifist at first, with Takato caught in the middle. In the end, Ruki never actually attains a particularly close relationship with Takato compared to Jian, nor does she really keep up a particular competitive streak with Takato; she kind of pops in and out at her leisure because of her more independent streak, and Jian ends up more of Takato's right-hand man (which is why the franchise presumably picks him as the secondary character to feature whenever they do "secondary characters"), but neither Takato nor Jian are prone to conflict and the entire trope is just fundamentally absent. The Tamers trio, is, ultimately, a trio.

Frontier: Takuya and Kouji are probably the first pair to really look like a proper execution of the trope, and at the very least they align pretty perfectly to how it's known in Sentai: a more hot-headed, aggressive lead with a more cool-headed and cynical right-hand man, where they end up often prone to conflict over dispute on how to best lead the team. However, while it's much more of a conventional execution than Adventure (since Adventure had Yamato actually be more prone to being an emotional fuse bomb whereas Taichi was often too chill more than anything), there being any conflict isn’t gone into that deeply beyond just "their personalities are complementary", and in that sense it's not far off from Adventure itself.

Savers: The series kind of baits you into thinking it might go this way when Nanami taunts Tohma about how he had to resort to a Masaru-esque tactic to beat her (it's one of its early red herrings about Tohma supposedly betraying the group), and it does have traces at the start because of how blatant of a foil Tohma is to Masaru, but one thing important to consider is that while the "rivalry" of what's being competed over is barely even relevant in most Digimon series to begin with, Masaru and Tohma don't even have a "group" to lead -- they're the employees under DATS who are being given orders from above, and are dealing with situations as they come. Masaru ends up leading the charge a bit, but he's not actually a leader in any shape or form, and Savers is more of a story of Masaru's coming-of-age than anything else, so while the series mostly has to do with his personal philosophy more than Tohma's, it ultimately lets the two of them pursue their lives their own ways. Masaru's worst bout of infamous anger is at being hurt over Tohma's apparent betrayal, not against him personally.

Xros Wars: I would say this is the only series to date where the term "rivals" properly applies, and it's because they're fighting over something concrete: the Code Crowns, and eventually Digital World territory. So in this case, for the first two parts, the answer is obviously Kiriha; Nene was a rival at first, but after various events happened she allied with Xros Heart early into Death Generals, and while Taiki and Kiriha had a relationship of mutual respect, Kiriha still considered him an opponent over what they were competing for until eventually the Xros Heart United Army fully came into formation. In the manga version, Kiriha does invoke the word "rival" in the above sense of competing to polish one's skills, but ironically, its version of the Death Generals arc involves them being much more in-tune with the same goals, so it might actually apply less because Taiki kind of responds with "uh, sure...?" since he's not nearly as interested in self-improvement. In Hunters, while it initially seems like it might be Yuu, the answer is really Ryouma, and note that Ryouma never really forms a particularly close relationship with Tagiru; it's just that he's the person most at the forefront for competing with Tagiru in the Hunt, to the point he's the first person chosen to wield the Brave Snatcher and turns out to be a bit of a foil for Tagiru in terms of actually having admired Taiki this whole time.

Appmon: Also does not exist. Rei tried to do the whole schtick in terms of competing for the Seven Code Appmon at first, but Haru was having none of that and immediately reached out to him emotionally, worrying about his welfare, and although Rei had a bit of a detached relationship with the other Appli Drivers thereafter, it really was friendly more than anything, just a bit awkward. Haru and Yuujin aren't even on the table, since their relationship is "best friends" akin to Daisuke and Ken.

Adventure: reboot: Also does not exist, considering that Taichi and Yamato bickering over the best way to approach things is limited to the very beginning of the series (and one of those times was with Yamato and Sora, not Yamato and Taichi, at that). In fact, I think most of these kids have been acting separately for most of the series anyway...?

[thiswasinevitableid]

57 sternclay nsfw? i can see stern complaining to a stranger that his ex complained about how weird his kinks were while dumping him

Here you go! 57: “we’re fighting over the last box of half-off valentine’s day chocolate and end up in a “who has it worse” battle.

For being in a mountain town in the slow season, the seasonal candy shelves of the Kepler Walgreens are bare. Were it 10 am on Valentines Day, Joseph would be in a panic. At 10 p.m, it feels like yet more proof this trip is utterly doomed.

But he didn’t become one of the top agents in the Department of Unexplained Phenomena by being unobservant. On the top shelf, pushed towards the back, is a bag of Reese's hearts and a bag of M&Ms. Thank you, years of training.

Being six feet tall helps too.

He’s so locked onto his target that he doesn’t notice the other person in the store until their hands smack into each other en route to the bags.

“Sorry, uh, lemme just get these and I’ll get out of your way.” A voice as deep and sweet as summer honey reaches his ears.

“I’m sorry, but I was going to buy these.” He starts pulling the bags towards him, only for the other guy to grab them. Joseph glares; the man trying to relieve him of his last solace looks like the kind of lumberjack you see in recordings titled things, “Log Pounders IV” or “Bear Hunting.”

“Look, buddy, I really need these so can you, like, find some other bags?”

“These are the last two. And I guarantee I need them more.” As long as he keeps a pleasant voice and gives no ground, this should go smoothly.

“Unless you got dumped this month, I don’t think you do.”

“I got dumped seven hours ago.” He says through an increasingly tight-lipped smile.

“At least your ex isn’t tagging you in a bunch of photos bragging about his new boyfriend.”

“He can’t, because he probably only just got back to his apartment in the rental car. The one I’m now stranded here without.”

“Pfft, just call an Uber or something.”

“It’ll cost several hundred dollars to get home!”

“You look like you can afford it.” Brown eyes flick from his hair down to his shoes, “some of us have to use half-price candy to soothe our wounds. You’re probably staying at the kind of fancy B&B where they have complimentary booze.”

“I would be, except their was a fuck-up with the reservation. Which my ex took as proof this was time to end things, and is the reason I’m dragging this all over town.” He kicks his ergonomically designed, rolling suitcase hard enough that it bumps into his adversary.

“Better he gave you some bullshit reason than the truth, which mine was all too happy to tell me. You can have these when someone you tried to make happy tells you he thinks you’re ‘too soft’ and that if only you’d manned up he woulda stayed, whatever the fuck that even means.”

Goddamnit, Joseph is not about to lose this argument--and his candy--on top of everything else.

“I’ll trade you that for being told you’re: too exacting, far more uncool than your job implies, too anxious, too invested in your work, that your whole personality is flawed and, just for extra fun, that your kinks are too weird and no one in their right mind would ever want to sleep with you if they knew them ahead of time.”

The other man’s hold on the bags loosens. Then it returns, stronger than before, as he grumbles, “Please, no one’s kinks are that weird.”

“You have no idea what mine are.”

“Then how about you give me a demonstration, huh?” Lumberjack snaps.

Joseph's common sense finally catches up with his thirst for comfort and, apparently, conflict.

“I, I’m sorry, did you just offer to fuck me in the middle of a fight over discount candy?”

“I....” the man lets go of the bags, chuckles, “yeah, I did. Fuck, I’m sorry, it’s been such a shitty day that my mouth decided it was gonna do whatever it took to stay in that fight.”

Joseph laughs a little, slumping against the shelf, “I guess it’s nice to know I’m not the only person in town whose Valentine’s Day didn’t go to plan.”

“No kidding. Though, uh, I didn’t get dumped this month. It was three months ago. He did tag me in all those photos today though.”

“That’s so rude.”

“Not as rude as leaving your boyfriend stranded in the mountains.”

B-grade pop hits fill the awkward silence between them.

“I, uh, this might be way outta line, but I got an idea; if you buy the candy, I can take us back to my place and bake something with it. That way we can both enjoy it, and you won’t be stuck wandering around in the cold.”

He runs a quick is-this-a-serial-killer scan of the man in front of him.

“Sure. But just so you know, I’m opening the Reeses in the car.”

-----------------------------------------------------

“Feeling better?” Barclay, his host, wipes stray cupcake crumbs from his lips.

“Much.” He polishes off his second coffee-cocoa cupcake with M&Ms in the batter, lifts his coffee cup, “this place is lucky to have you.”

Barclay blushes the same way he has every time Joseph compliments his cooking, home, or taste in books. They’ve spent the last ninety minutes in the kitchen of Barclay’s small, A-Frame cabin, one of eight laid out in a half circle behind Amnesty Lodge. The cook explained that the cabins were for staff or long term residents, and that while the Lodge sometimes had vacancies, this week had seen them swamped.

The rain alternates between pleasant pitter-pats and drops that could kill a small bird, so Joseph is incredibly grateful to Barclay for giving him a place to shelter. When he thanks him, the cook shrugs with a little smile, “you shouldn’t leave nice things out in the rain.”

As they’re cleaning up the dishes, Barclay passes him a plate and says, “You can stay here tonight. If, uh, if you want. The couch isn’t much, but it’s dry and I’ve got a bunch of spare blankets.”

“That’d be great, thank you. And, um, thank you for being so nice to me, given how we met.”

“Eh, no one who’s in a Walgreens after ten is in a good mood. And, uh, it’s nice to have someone to talk with. I’m kinda the quiet one of my friends, and work is mostly calling orders and stuff.” He pulls the coffee pot from the heat, “can I top you off?”

“Yes, please.” His caffeine tolerance is so high a few cups late at night doesn’t mess with his sleep. Barclay is sticking with tea, something scented like cardamon and comfort.

They move to the couch that’s clearly been re-covered a dozen times, Barclay only getting up to turn on some music; delta blues, if Joseph’s ear is right. It’s not until the clock strikes one thirty that Joseph notices they’re sitting so close that their knees bump whenever one of them turns to talk.

“Okay, I gotta ask” Barclay’s brown eyes shine sweet and playful, “what exactly was so weird about your kinks that your dickhead ex went out of his way to mention them?”

He thinks a moment, scanning his body and noticing he’s more relaxed than he’s been in weeks, including all the times he spent with his ex. Something about the faint scent of dish-soap on Barclays hands, the gentle smile that makes Joseph certain that--for all his bulk--if Joseph told him to roll over and show his belly, he’d do it in an instant, the way he doesn’t rolls his eyes or shy away when Joseph talks, all of that makes him calm. Which makes him bold.

“Wait right here.” He hops up, grabs his bag from the door and pulls it over to the rug by the couch. All he has to do to reveal his secret is lift his pajamas.

“Holy fuck.” Barclay leans forward, “you really came prepared.”

“It was supposed to be a romantic getaway. I...we’d never used any of this together, but I hoped we might this time. It’s, it’s not his fault, I know my tastes aren’t for everyone, and we had plenty in common in bed. But he went through this whole thing where he said we should share our deepest fantasies. Apparently wanting to be choked is fine, but wanting to fuck Mothman is not.”

“That’s what this one is.” Barclay picks up one of the two dildos, black with lots of swirling ridges.

“That’s actually my dragon one. Um.” he holds up the ovipositor toy, “this one is supposed to be mothman.”

Barclay squishes one of the silicone eggs, “that feels kinda nice. What else did you bring?”

His genuine interest is not helping Joseph keep his hopes under control.

“The other toy is the ‘bigfoot’ model. And this is, um, this is my newest one, I was so excited I pre-ordered it. It acts like a cock-sleeve, but this part here is supposed to mimic a, um, a knot.”

“Like the idea of getting knotted, babe?” The cook’s voice is a little deeper than when he last spoke, and rather than pulling away he’s inching into Joseph’s space.

“Yes. I, um, I’m getting the sense” he shifts so his hands are on Barclay’s knees, “that we might have something in common besides our taste in leftover candy.”

“I packed all this so carefully” he brushes their lips together, “it’d be a shame to let it sit unused.”

Barclay scoops him into a kiss, growling happily when Joseph instantly parts his lips. His beard is soft and tickly under Joseph’s palms, and his mind takes the thought of getting beard-burn on his thighs and runs so far with it that he almost misses what Barclay says next.

“In that case, you better decide if you want me to open your ass up so I can fuck you with a knot, or if you wanna do it yourself.”

“I prefer to do it myself.”

A second kiss, a bit gentler this time, “bedroom’s at the end of the hall. Get naked and wait for me there?”

“Roger that, big guy.”

When Barclay growls this time it’s rougher, jumping out of his chest and seeming to surprise him.

Joseph undresses as Barclay stops off in the bathroom, rifling through the medicine cabinet while Joseph folds his clothes. He’s down to his boxers when he remembers there is a conversation he needed to have before it hit this point.

“You trying to get me to rip those off with my teeth?” Barclay grins as he sets some condoms and lube on the bed and starts taking off his pants.

“I, um, there’s something you should be aware of. We don’t have the same, um, set-up.”

Barclay furrows his brow, gets his meaning, then nods, “no problem. If you’re okay with that part of you being involved I, uh, I just got a really, really good idea for what to do.”

“It’s not always the case, but tonight I definitely want it involved. I want you inside me as many ways as possible.”

“Fuck yeah.” Barclay tosses his shirt into the laundry, “get your ass open enough to take that knot.”

He slips the condom on, douses it with lube, and presses the first finger in, discovering that he's unable to stop complimenting Barclay for even five seconds while he finishes disrobing. The flush under his dark chest hair is unendingly charming, as is the little whine he makes at Joseph telling him he likes how big he is.

“I, I’m serious, ahhn, it’s rare to find someone taller than me and I really like it.”

“Feeds into the monster thing?” Barclay crawls beside him, laying down so he can kiss him as he works the second finger in.

“In a way.”

A deep, rumbly chuckle that has Joseph fucking himself hurriedly, “Don’t be coy, babe. You like the thought of something big and hairy getting a hold of you and not letting you go until you’re dripping cum.”

“Holy shit, yes” he gets the third finger in, sighing as Barclay nuzzles his neck.

“Well, I’m not bigfoot, but I’m betting I’ll do just fine.”

“More than fine.” Joseph kisses him, feels him smile in a way that melts his heart like cheap chocolate.

“Got some other theories about you, babe, but you gotta wait until you’re on my dick to hear ‘em.” Barclay sits up, stroking his cock in time with Joseph’s hand, “fucking-A, can’t believe your ex didn’t wanna stick around for this. You look like a fucking porn star; we oughta record you getting fucked in your suit and sell if for big bucks.”

He moans, pulling his fingers free, “Fuck me now. Please.”

“Fuck that’s hot.” Barclay works the sleeve down over his cock, sits up against the wall, “come sit in my lap, facing away.”

Joseph straddles him, gasps when the head of his cock presses in. He prepped well, but all the same he has to take his time wiggling his way down. Barclay caresses him, grunting and whimpering whenever he moves, breath prickling the hairs at the base of his neck. It’s heavenly.

When he hits the knot, Barclay rubs more lube on it, but it stays outside of him as he grinds on it. Between moans, the cook manages to say, “want me to start the next part?”

“Yes, please.”

Barclay loads the ovipositor with the three eggs, praises Joseph for being a good boy when he spreads his legs to accommodate the head of the toy.

“I, I thought you had more you were going to tell me?” He tilts his head awkwardly to kiss Barclay’s shoulder.

“Uh huh.” Barclay slowly works the toy in and out, doing his best to sync it to the rolls of his hips, “I think you’re the kind of guy who doesn’t just want one monster; you want ‘em all.”

“Variety is, ohgod, part of a healthy sex life.”

“I don’t mean one monster on one day and a different one on another. I think you want them all at once.”

“Oh yes, oh! Ohohoh” he kicks his legs as the first egg pushes in, “fuck, Barclay, please keep going.”

“Whatever you want, babe.” He nuzzles Joseph’s hair, “that’s how I came up with this plan; seeing all those different dicks made me think you’d, fuck, you’d like me to pretend there was more than just me fucking you.”

Joseph nods, clinging to Barclays arm and bearing down on the knot.

“Can just see it now; you got yourself lost in the woods out here, go looking for help only to find a whole bunch of monsters waiting for you. Spend the rest of the night pressed into the dirt and leaves while every cryptid from, fuck” he bucks his hips, “from here to Canada had their turn.”

“Shit, shit” the knot starts pushing in, “y-you’ve got my number, big guy.”

“Yeah?” Barclay squeezes the base of the toy as he talks, causing the remaining two eggs to push their way in, Joseph’s body clenching around them, “you want a night where all your good for is being fucked, where if you beg for a break you get a bigfoot fucking your throat and werewolves cumming on your chest instead of them all mobbing you at once?”

“Shit, yes, YESohfuck” the knot enters him as Barclay shoves his hips down, “ohmygod that’s good, fuck, I feel so full, you’re so smart, this was genius, fuck you know how to treat meAHannnfuck, shit.” He holds on to Barclays arm’s as the other man fucks him with abandon.

“Oh I know, babe. Know I was fucking right. You wanna be claimed, wanna be owned, wanna be bred by a whole fuckin pack-”

“Jesuschrist” it’s hard to breathe at the pace Barclay sets, his body aching to cum but not quite able to get there. He squeezes his eyes shut, rubbing frantically at his dick as Barclay loses himself in the fantasy.

“You’d be so cute, leaves in your hair and cum on your chin, taking it all and begging for more. Good thing you’re so needy, you could tear a pack apart with folks fighting over who gets to fuck you, fuck, Joseph, baby, you’re so fucking good, gonna be so fucking good to you, fuck, fuck” he shoves as deep as he can while he cums, and in the haze of pleasure Joseph swears claws prick the skin of his chest. Just the thought of that sends his own orgasm coursing through him, his body tensing and twisting on Barclay’s cock, making them both moan from sudden overstimulation.

“S-sorry” Barclay pants.

“Nothing to apologize for, just physiology, here, let me ow, ow, okay maybe I should have relaxed more first.” He’s free of both toys, but that was right on the edge of too painful. He waits for Barclay to take off the sleeve, then rolls the bigger man so his head is on his chest.

“Your ex didn’t know how good they had it.”

“Thanks, babe.”

He smiles, “I like that. No one ever calls me something that informal.”

“Call you it whenever you want. Babe.” Barclay kisses his arm, “you can, uh, stay in bed if you want. We don’t have a ton of time together so I’d, uh, well, I’d like to spend as much of it with you as I can.”

For the first time, Joseph wishes his vacation would last longer.

“Agreed, big guy.”

--------------------------------------------------

“You said you had my new assignment, sir?”

“Yes. Agent Stern, you will be going to the town of Kepler to investigate the events described in this file.” Agent Hayes passses him the folder.

“Understood, sir.”

Joseph manages to keep his smile to himself all the way to his desk.

[virgojeons]

true love (jjk)

summary: you and jungkook spend your first christmas together. 

alternatively, a merry love story based on the lyrics of true love by ariana grande.

genre: fluff, humor, college au, established relationship, holiday series, jeon jungkook x reader

word count: 4.6k

warnings: cursing, implied sexual content, excessive use of pet names

wattpad version here, ao3 version here

a/n: well, here i am!! pls be gentle with me, this is the first time ive ever posted my writing on here and ive been debating it for months lmao. i truly truly hope u enjoy!!

on the first day of christmas when you gave me all them kisses, boy you showed me things, come hold me please and never let me go.

"Five days until Christmas and you're still decorating the tree?"

You yelped at the sudden sound of your boyfriend's voice, dropping your over-accessorized ornament and watching helplessly as it shattered against the floor.

Immediately, you whined. "Jungkook!"

Jungkook suppressed a grin at the furrow of your eyebrows and the pout of your lips, kicking his shoes off and tossing his coat onto the couch. He didn't mean to scare you, really. You even knew he was coming over. It's just that you left the front door unlocked (as you always did when he was on his way, despite him constantly scolding you for it) and there was no way you would've heard him come in over the sound of Jingle Bell Rock blaring through the house.

"Sorry, baby," He chuckled, bending down beside you to help pick up the remnants of your best ornament. "I didn't mean to scare you."

You glared at him in between collecting the shards of glass in your hand. "I spent hours making that."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. Hot glue gun burns, sparkles stuck on my face and everything."

Jungkook took the pieces of glass from you with an amused look on his face, standing from his kneeling position to toss them in the trash can you had earlier moved to the living room for easy access. "I'm sorry. I'll make you another one."

"It's not the same." You sulked, finding fun in being stubborn and giving him a hard time. It was getting increasingly difficult though, with his rosy nose and ears and that little gleam in his eyes.

It was then that he made his first move of the night, tugging you by your oversized Rudolph sweater so quickly that you had to latch onto his shoulders for leverage with a squeal. His grin only seemed to grow once you were officially in his space, taking notice of your lack of pants and the snowflake stockings that appeared to be in their place instead.

"You don't look too sorry," You chuckled, heart stuttering at the way he was gazing down at you in such close proximity.

Jungkook shrugged, nudging his nose with yours. "I'm just happy."

They were such simple words, but it was the way he said them, the way he looked at you when he said them. You couldn’t lie, the excitement of spending your first Christmas together, completely alone, was incredibly infectious. It was gross and it was corny and everything else you swore you would never be, but you were in love with Jungkook. Devastatingly so. You from nine months ago probably wouldn’t even recognize the present you; a fact that friends, family, and even Jungkook alike loved to tease you about. Cracking the so-called ice queen was a feat to be celebrated, apparently. Whatever. He was yours and you were his so you didn’t quite care about the technicalities of it. Even if the story went a bit differently, in your opinion. 

The brutal snow and temperatures of February were beginning to fade into spring when you met Jungkook. 

You and Jimin had been attempting to finish your economics homework together in your favorite coffee shop; a hidden treasure that was a ten minute walk from campus and ticked all your aesthetic boxes. You two were sipping from your respective hot drinks, neglecting your heaps of bookwork in favor of discussing the new season of Stranger Things. Jimin was deep into his theory of Hopper still being alive when his eyes flickered to the door at the sound of the bell, widening slightly in recognition before a bright smile took over his face.

"Jungkook!" Jimin called, waving whoever it was over.

You followed his gaze and turned your head in the direction of the entrance, growing curious when the boy walking towards your table wasn't familiar to you. It took you less than five seconds to realize that the boy in question was attractive. 

Like, extremely attractive. The kind of attractive that should not be subjected to the way you look right now. 

It took you even less time to whip your head back around, glaring at Jimin with wide eyes and a panicked expression.

He met your glare with a confused scrunch of his eyebrows before it slowly transformed into a smirk, quickly catching on to what your pointed look was for. The night before had been a late one. You, like any other normal millennial, had impulse bought a pretty yellow Nintendo Switch solely for the new Animal Crossing game. As soon as it arrived on your doorstep you were retreating into your room, tearing the package open with squeals of excitement.

Maybe you completely lost track of time and played until your eyes were bloodshot and you heard birds chirping outside. Maybe you got an astounding two hours of sleep. And maybe you had fallen asleep without setting an alarm and woke up thirty minutes later than usual. 

The details were insignificant though, because you were throwing on a pair of leggings and the first sweatshirt you saw, brushing your hair and your teeth, and hastily sprinting to your car all in record time.

No sleep. No makeup. No breakfast. And worst of all, no coffee.

And so, it was blatantly clear you had no desire to let a boy that beautiful even glance at you in that state, let alone introduce himself. But it didn't look like you had a choice in the matter, because moments later he was towering over your table with a stupidly handsome smile.

Jungkook grinned, reaching out to do that Weird Bro Handshake with Jimin. "Hey, Chim."

You were already plotting various methods of painful revenge in your head.

"Hey, Kook. What are you doing here?"

"I kind of work here," He chuckled. "Well, as of like, yesterday. Today's my first day."

"Oh, so this is the new job you were telling me about," Jimin nodded in realization, then his eyes flickered mischievously to yours. You’re rapidly shaking your head. "You know, this is my friend ___'s favorite coffee spot."

A scowl immediately takes over your face, only to be wiped off and replaced by a sickeningly sweet smile when Jungkook turns his head to look your way. The instant your eyes meet his you quite literally want to melt into the floor. 

Jungkook smiles at you. Like, really smiles. "Hey, that's cool. We'll probably be seeing a lot of each other then, right?"

Across the table, Jimin snorts, which only adds to the way your cheeks are absolutely flaming. You send a harsh kick to Jimin's leg as inconspicuously as you can, all while batting your eyelashes at Jungkook.

"Uh, yeah! We probably... will."

Jungkook looks positively amused, but if he notices Jimin rushing to clutch his leg, he doesn't say anything.

"Sweet," He grins again. There's a brief few seconds where you two are just gazing at each other, stupid and shy, until Jimin loudly clears his throat. "Right, well, I should probably go clock in. Let's chill sometime this week, Chim."

"Sure thing." Jimin sings, smugness plastered all over his face.

Jungkook waves, already backing away from the table with his eyes on you. "Nice meeting you."

You feel yourself flush again and you absolutely hate it. "Nice meeting you too."

With a final smile, Jungkook disappears behind the employee doors. The moment he leaves your eyes are screwed shut and you're slamming your head against the table. The silence speaks for itself. You don't even need to see Jimin's face to know that he's either smirking or stifling his laughter.

"Don't." You warn.

"You just blushed," He says anyway. "Like, four times."

"I most definitely did not blush."

"You did. You still are."

"I'm embarrassed!" You wail. "That's literally the only reason why. I look like I got ran over and dragged for three blocks."

"Jungkook sure doesn't seem to think so," Jimin hums, snickering as he sips his coffee.

"Stop."

"He likes you." He insists.

"He was just being polite." You defend.

"That is literally my childhood best friend. I think I would know."

This makes you pause. Then you sigh. "He doesn't even know me."

He doesn’t disagree. But then again, "Not yet."

"Stop trying to play matchmaker, Jimin. He said five words to me," You spoke firmly, exasperated as you downed the final sip of your latte. "Plus, I'm just focusing on me and my degree right now. No distractions."

Jimin knew that you were already worn out, and even though he was mostly joking around, he wouldn’t want to push you any further. He’d drop it.

"Fine. We'll see who's right in the end, though."

For now.

"I will dump that hot coffee over your head."

As it turns out, Jimin was kind of right.

It takes a grand total of four visits to your favorite coffee shop before Jungkook asks you out. The first time you were by yourself, nose buried in a book as Jungkook was clocking in. He wasn't able to speak to you until about an hour later, when the morning rush had passed and you had finally lifted your head from whatever was in that book. 

You were honestly dreading facing him again, but you were prepared and actually presentable this time. Also you were kind of starving. And so, you hesitantly approached the counter. Jungkook took your order, both of you all fidgeting hands and sheepish smiles. You mentally patted yourself on the back when you spoke without any real mess-ups, and prayed that the cool girl aura you always tried so desperately to maintain was being transmitted. 

Not like you were trying to leave a lasting impression, or anything.

He hand delivered you your coffee and muffin with a beaming grin, all while his new boss glared at him from behind the counter. He didn't have to know that you knew cashiers weren't supposed to serve the food.

The second visit was a few days after. You were with Jimin again, shooting down every jab he made about you only wearing a pretty dress because you knew you would be coming here. Jungkook joined you both during his break. As soon as he untied his apron and sat himself directly across from you, it struck. You knew you were screwed. You just couldn't stop staring at him. The chin in the palm of your hands and sparkles in your eyes type of staring. You would be much more ashamed if you couldn’t see the way he was staring right back. Jimin found this hilarious, of course, and would subtly find ways to connect you two in conversation. You weren't sure if you loved or hated him for it.

It was that visit that Jungkook insisted on sharing his slice of strawberry cake with you, claiming he wasn't that hungry. The both of you were embarrassed, whacking his arm and dismissing him as Jimin complained about being the third wheel. By the end of his break, Jungkook was positively smitten, you were begrudgingly infatuated, and Jimin was awfully smug. He reluctantly said bye to you both, and you were slouching forward with your head in your hands the moment he disappeared from visibility.

Jimin looked extremely pleased. "Believe me now?"

"Focusing on school," You protested. It was a weak one, but. Well.

"Are you trying to convince me or yourself?" He mused.

And suddenly, you were frantic. Panicking. This was definitely not a part of the plan.

Quickly packing up your things, you groaned loudly. "You. Maybe me. Or both. I can't think in this place anymore."

"You'll be all over each other by next week."

"Shh!" You were childishly covering your ears and speed-walking out of the café.

Try as you might, you couldn't help yourself and returned the very next day after all your classes had finished. Jungkook was already there when you walked in, taking a customer's order but doing a double take and flashing you a smile when you appeared in his line of sight. This visit consisted of nothing but pretending.

Pretending to be studying. Pretending you weren't listening to him take orders just to hear his voice. Pretending you weren't sneaking glances at him. Pretending that the way your eyes kept meeting wasn't making your skin prickle. And you were just fine pretending, until suddenly he was in the seat across from with you his apron off and a steaming hot chocolate in hand. You tried your hardest to remain indifferent, you really did. But then he was pushing the beverage towards you with gentle eyes and his smile hopeful, telling you it was his treat because he noticed how hard you were studying. And then you were melting right along with the marshmallows in that mug.

The two of you talked about your majors, your families, your favorite shows, even Jimin. You asked about his tattoos and he explained them with ease. You also may have pulled out one of the oldest tricks in the book at the sight of his knuckle tattoos, gasping in feigned wonder when you pulled his hand against yours to measure the size difference. 

His hand could swallow yours whole and still have some leftover, you discovered. It was a very rewarding experiment.

You made each other laugh and blush down to the very last second of his break. Scarily enough, being in each other's presence was so annoyingly addictive that you found yourself hesitant to watch him leave. You could tell Jungkook felt the same by the way he dragged out his goodbyes. I work again on Thursday, maybe I'll see you then? Your fingers brushed as he softly took the mug from you. It was really fun talking to you. You were biting your lip to keep from smiling embarrassingly big. You look really pretty today, by the way. And then he was off.

You made a strangled noise the second you were outside with your fingers frantically beginning to type a message to Jimin.

promise not to say i told you so :///

Jungkook asked you out on your fourth visit. As soon as you approached the counter, he just blurted it out. As if it was something he couldn't hold on his tongue any longer. You couldn't hear yourself say yes over your brain malfunctioning and the powerful thumping of your heart, but you knew you did. His heartbreakingly gorgeous grin told you so.

On his break, Jungkook brought you a latte with a heart carved in the cream. You just couldn't conceal the coo that escaped you, which quickly resulted in his cheeks reddening. 

Cute, you thought. 

He quizzed you on your personality and the type of activities you liked to do, admitting that he would use the information to conjure up the best date you would ever go on. Six days later, Jungkook stayed true to his word. Not only was it the best date you had ever been on, but you were completely certain it would ruin any other dates for you moving forward, unless they were with him. Much to your annoyance and also utter delight, you were so sure of Jeon Jungkook and your brief but striking time together that you kissed him. Right on the swings of your favorite childhood playground, first date rules tossed aside.

He was so caught off guard that his eyes expanded to twice their normal size and your teeth banged together. You drew back, slightly mortified and ready to jump to your death from the tallest slide on the playground, but Jungkook was huffing a laugh onto your lips and grabbing your face like it was nothing. Then you two got it just right, and something clicked. The earth fell off its axis and you were rendered breathless and all that nauseating cliché shit you chastised as a myth. And from that day forward, you two were completely, tooth-rottingly, inseparable.

"Easy," Jungkook proclaimed, pecking your lips. "We finished the tree."

He set you back on the floor gently, releasing a dramatic breath of air as if lifting you to place the star on top of the tree had actually winded him. As if he wasn't a muscle pig. You rolled your eyes and told him as much.

"Don't be a baby, muscle pig," You shoved at his bicep, only proving your point further when he didn't move an inch. ‘And I finished the tree.”

Instead, he caught the hand that you nudged him with and pulled your back to his chest, caging you between his arms. "Muscle pig, huh? That's what you think of me, baby?"

You flushed at the teasing lilt in his voice, suddenly very eager to escape his hold. But try as you might, he just wouldn't budge. A loud laugh left your throat as you flailed in his grasp, his muscled arms bulging in the turtleneck you bought him for his birthday a few months ago. Suddenly, you decided that you would be returning it for your own personal peace.

A high pitched whine left your mouth, one that lost all its seriousness once it was drowned out by your giggles. "Jungkook, let go of me!"

You would just not stop wiggling, and Jungkook could not stop laughing. He could live the rest of his life like this, his brain pauses to think. He's so happy.

And when you're thrashing so violently that your heel kicks his pocket with a force that has an object clattering onto the floor, Jungkook has never reacted faster in his life. Instantly your imprisonment is gone, and Jungkook is on your floor in a flash. Your eyebrows draw together at the sight of him scrambling for whatever it is, and all you're able to see is a sleek black case before he's quickly stuffing it back in his pocket.

You're eyeing him when he rises back on his feet. "Feel like sharing?"

Jungkook whistles noncommittally. "Not particularly, no."

There's a drawn-out beat of silence where you're just gazing at each other, neither one of you backing down. And then you're crossing your arms, and he's looking at your nose and your forehead and anywhere but your eyes, and then you're arching an eyebrow. He looks at you and breaks. Defeat.

"It's your present," He lets out a heavy sigh. "Well, the main one anyway."

You positively squeal. "Ooh! Can I see? Please?"

"Baby, it's the 20th."

"Can I have a hint?"

Jungkook blinks. "No, you cannot have a hint."

You're instantly pouting, but Jungkook expects that, because he knows you better than anyone else. Which is why he knows that you're a little spoiled, with a bit of a bratty streak, with just a dash of calculated charm that you use to your advantage to get just about anything you want. He's never seen it as a bad thing. In fact, he finds it cute. A little hot, too, if he's being truthful.

Anyway, he came prepared. Just as you're opening your mouth to no doubt make him spill the surprise, he's hushing you with a bruising kiss to your lips. The kind of kiss that makes you go pliant against him, the kind that makes you make a little noise in the back of your throat. The kind you've been waiting for all night. 

It’s the trick that never truly runs its course. 

And Jungkook is melting, too. Melting, turning to mush at your very feet, until you're moving backwards and clutching at his shoulders, ready to push him onto the couch.

"Mmm," He's humming against you, before he reluctantly draws back. He lets you chase his lips once, twice, before he chuckles lowly. "Hold on, angel."

You're suddenly feeling warm all over after his kisses, wanting nothing more than to cuddle into him into the couch and feel him next to you. Or maybe above you. With that chain you always tugged on dangling in your face. You really weren't picky.

You watched Jungkook break away from you and rummage through his bag with a frown and a newfound heat at the pit of your belly. "It can't wait?"

Like he said, he knows you, which means he knew kisses alone wouldn’t be able to satiate you nor get you to stop asking questions for the entire week. No matter how mind-numbing they may be.

"One second," He promised, and you definitely counted at least five, but he quickly found what he was looking for all the same. "I brought a surprise. Well, two surprises."

He was holding both of his hands behind his back with this stupid grin on his face. You squinted for a few seconds, suspicious, before breathing out a laugh. "Are you ever gonna show me?"

Jungkook looked way too happy with himself.

"The most important surprise is mistletoe, obviously. Gonna have to find a way to glue it on to the ceiling above your bed." And there was that mischievous little smile that told you he had every intention of carrying that out.

You folded your arms over your body and scoffed. Even if you were trying and failing to keep your lips from quirking up and possibly, maybe finding it a little harder to breathe all of a sudden. "You're unbelievable, Jeon."

He just winked and held up his other hand, pulling a gasp from your lips the second you realized what it was.

"The Polar Express!"

"I had to check like, four different stores in the mall to find it. That's why I got here a little late, by the way. But I thought we could make some hot chocolate like in the movie and watch it together and," Jungkook pauses to think, licking his lips. "There's a 'ride my train' joke in here somewhere but I don't know how to say it."

He's snorting at his own delivery before you are, and once your giggles permeate the air he's invading your space again with a lovesick smile.

"You are the sweetest boy," You praise, holding his pretty face with both hands and peppering small kisses all over it the way he secretly likes. "But you make me sick to my stomach sometimes."

If anything, this makes him smile even wider. "I love you too, baby."

You and Jungkook are in complete darkness besides the light coming from the TV in your room playing Polar Express. His head is on your shoulder with his arm strewn across your waist, and his entire leg slotted between yours. He's soft. He smells like the lavender body soap you keep in your shower. His gentle breaths hit your neck every time he exhales and you're now cliché enough to believe that the heart underneath you beats in tandem with yours. 

Both of your stomachs are filled from the takeout he ordered for dinner and the peppermint hot chocolate you made while he was in the shower. You're still mentally replaying the moment he stepped back in your room, towel wrapped around his waist with droplets of water cascading down his body. His prominent abs and tattoos and wet hair had you scrambling to sit up, clearing your throat as you tasked yourself with handing him his mug. If he noticed you ogling him, he surely didn’t react to it.

Made us some cocoa, you said.

He brought the beverage to his nose and sniffed once, twice, before his entire face bunched up. Peppermint is nasty. Then he was gulping it down.

I thought it was nasty, you laughed in disbelief.

Nothing you make me can be nasty. Thank you, baby.

And now you’re thoroughly warm from the tips of your fingertips down to your toes, and you figure it has less to do with the cocoa and more with the way Jungkook so obviously loves you. The way you love him.

Feeling a tugging at your shirt, you look down to see him peering up at you with a dazed twinkle in his eye. "You're not hot in this?"

You purse your lips and pause, knowing what was coming. "No. Are you?"

He has the decency to look a little clueless. He was always doing that, in a playfully childish way you grew to love.

"Actually, yeah I am," Jungkook furrows his brows, like it was something he was just now realizing. And then he's sitting up and pulling his shirt over his head, and you're instantly staring at his back and remembering the way it feels to rake your fingers up and down it, and he's turning back to you with a lazy smirk. "You don't wanna take yours off, angel?"

You swallow. "I'm okay."

Jungkook starts to laugh, that cocky laugh that is equal parts douchebag-ish and sexy. He's most definitely turning you on and he most definitely knows this, which is why you're glaring at him until he reaches over you and picks up the mistletoe from your bedside desk. He dangles it over your heads, makes sure to wriggle his eyebrows suggestively when he does it, and you want to laugh, you really do. You would probably roll your eyes and call him a nerd too while you were at it, if it weren't for the way he was changing his position and starting to lean over you. Crowding your space in your favorite way. 

Jungkook hears your breathing pick up once you're directly under him, watches the way your lips part and your eyes change for him, and decides to go for the kill.

Nothing about the kiss was soft or gentle. Jungkook clearly had a point to prove and knew how he wanted to do it. The dangling mistletoe was soon forgotten in favor of holding your face by your chin, landing with a chime on your wooden floors. He worked your mouth open in that sloppy, messy, dirty way he only exhibited when he was feeling particularly desperate. Saliva pooled at the corners of your mouth and you were trembling underneath him, clutching at the warm skin of his back. It was nasty, absolutely obscene the way his tongue was in your mouth like his life depended on it. And you loved it. You couldn't stop making these little sounds, and Jungkook was groaning into your mouth right along with you. You were seconds away from pleading for him to do anything he wanted, to make you his, when he's abruptly pulling from you with a wet pop and a string of saliva between you.

Your ragged breaths fill the air, both of your chests heaving as you take a second to attempt to drag yourself out of the haze he's built around you two.

The asshole has the audacity to laugh. "Hot yet?"

"You don't have to bring out the mistletoe to kiss me, you know." You eventually say instead.

"I know," He pants, still smiling like the all-consuming beauty he is. "But you love Christmas. And it's our first. Wanna do it right."

You feel the need to close your eyes, let his words sink in, and so you do. You let the statement blanket over you until you're positively beaming, and when you open your eyes, he is the same. You are so irreversibly in love and you think he might be perfect. You tell him as much.

"You're perfect," You say, all soft and starry eyed. You're nodding when he starts shaking his head, and when the tips of his ears begin to turn red and he's putting his head down, you're giggling and putting both hands on either side of his head to get his eyes back on yours. "I love you a lot."

Jungkook is so happy. "Love you most."

And then he's leaning down again. This kiss is much less frantic, more steady, but still passionate and still with Jungkook, which means it fills your body with heat all the same. Your head is floating and you're squirming under his hold again when you break apart for air.

There's no point in trying to resist him anymore. You never can.

"I'm gonna take my sweater off now."

Jungkook scrunches his nose, and grins. "Okay."

read part two here!

[onceuponaloonatic]

the first drabble i write in months and it’s angst oops 🤧🤧

tw: vomit, alcohol poisoning, underage drinking

When Daehyung was allowed to spend the night at Sae’s house for the first time, he thought it was going to be amazing. Both Mina and Tzuyu were gone for the night and Sana had let Saya and Saki invite Yujin and Eunji over so she had extended the invasion to him as well. He had jumped at the opportunity, even if Sana had said he was only allowed to stay the night if he stayed in the guest room with the alphas. He wasn’t excited about spending the night with Saki and Saya, but when Sana went to sleep he realized all the girls didn’t intend on keeping the promise they had made to their mother. Yujin, Saya, Saki, and Eunji had found a party they all wanted to go to and they said if he wanted to stay in Sae’s room they would come wake him when they got back. He had immediately agreed and gone to Sae’s room. Nothing really too physical happened, but he did enjoy playing games with Sae until they fell asleep cuddling. It was so far a perfect night. Until his phone rang.

He thought it was a bit weird, no one typically called him at two thirty in the morning. It was even weirder when he realized it was Saki. One of Saya’s friends had driven the four of them and had agreed to be their designated driver, so he wasn’t expecting them to need a ride or anything. He thought they would be good. 

Sae woke up at the ringing too, whining and burying her face in Daehyung’s shoulder, telling him to make it stop. 

“It’s your sister.” Daehyung groaned. “Should I answer it?” 

“Yeah.” Sae yawned. “Answer it. Knowing Saya’s friend she probably got drunk and they need a ride.” “Okay.” Daehyung groaned. “Saki what the fuck?” He started the conversation.

“Daehyung… Daehyung hey.” “Yeah you called me.” Daehyung could tell Saki was intoxicated, the way her voice sounded was a dead give away.

“Hey can you drive now?”

“Yeah do you need a ride home?” “No… S-Something is wrong with Saya.” Saki sniffled, and Daehyung could tell she was crying. “We gave her water and tried to stop her but but something is wrong- Eunji says we need to take her to the hospital.” “Woah slow down what happened to Saya?” He asked, now much more awake. “W-We think she drank too much and and-”

“Okay, I get it. Keep her upright and make sure she can breathe, I’ll be there as quick as I can. Do you want me to wake up your mom?” “No, no she’ll be so mad. D-Daehyung will Saya get in trouble if she goes to the hospital, what if she gets arrested we’re underage-”

“Hey no, her life is more important than dumb shit like that, and the law reflects that. I’ll be there soon, bring plastic bags though I don’t want her throwing up in my car.”

“Okay… Please don’t tell Sae- you know how she is she will freak out and get super anxious and and-”

“I know. I’ll be there soon, who is the most sober?” 

“Eunji.” “Okay, ask Eunji to text me you guys location.”  Daehyung hung up, quickly getting up and looking for his car keys. “What’s going on?” Sae asked, rubbing her eyes. “Saya just tripped and Saki is freaking out a bit, and they need a ride. I’ll go get them and check on Saya, I think they are all freaking out because of the alcohol.” “Okay.” Sae yawned. “Call me if it’s serious.” “I will.” Daehyung kissed her cheek before leaving the room. He found Nico, Haeun, and Hina all asleep in sleeping bags in the game room. All three of them had fallen asleep hours ago, before the four of them had even left. They were all dead asleep still, but he couldn’t help but think about if something like this would ever happen to Haeun. He really hoped it didn’t, but she was a lot like Saya in a lot of ways. He hoped whoever she was with called him. He knew Kihyun wouldn’t be great in a situation like this. He would probably freak out and do about everything wrong. 

He left quietly, as not to wake anyone in the house. Of course, he knew what was probably wrong with Saya, and that time was of the essence. Alcohol poisoning could get really serious really fast, and it was the first time he had ever been in this position. He had learned about all of it through a friend when someone else in his class had experienced something similar, it was scary though. He knew some of the symptoms through research after that event, and it sounded like she might have it from his understanding. After getting the address from Eunji, he drove as fast as he could. There weren’t many people out at two thirty, so it didn’t take him too long to get there. Eunji had texted him they were upstairs in a room with Saya. He pushed past the crowd of teenagers and ignored multiple drink offers and pushed his way up the stairs. He found them quickly, Saki holding Saya up and she threw up in a bucket. “Daehyung’s here.” Saki commented. “Come on Saya.” Saya didn’t say anything as Saki patted her back. Once she was done Saki tried to help her up, but it ended with both of them almost falling. Eunji was holding Yujin in the corner while she was sobbing. “Okay Eunji help me with Saki, Yujin is it okay if Saki hugs you.” Daehyung went to help support Saya. He reached down and picked her up bridal style. “Hold a bag for her.” He told Eunji, who grabbed a plastic bag. “Okay. Saki I’ll trust you with Yujin. Eunji make sure she doesn’t throw up in my car.” Daheyung explained, moving all of them slowly. He pushed past the crowd again, bringing Saya to his car. He put her down in the backseat, having Eunji sit next to her. Saki helped Yujin into the seat next to Eunji and went to the front. “Okay, we’re going to go to the hospital. Eunji, can you call their mom please.” “Don’t call mom.” Saki choked out. “Call Sai.” “Your mom is going to find out-”

“Sai.” “Okay. Eunji call Sai. Tell her what’s going on.” Daehung sighed, starting driving. He drove slowly, trying not to jostle Saya too much. Saki’s leg was bouncing in the front seat as he drove. 

“Hi Sa Unnie it’s Eunji, yeah sorry it’s late but we think Saya might have alcohol poisoning. Yeah we are taking her to the hospital right now, yeah Daehung was driving, no he didn’t drink any. No Sae isn’t here. Yeah she can breathe but it’s pretty slow. She can’t hold any water down or any kind of liquid. No Saki insisted on telling you and not your parents. Okay, we should be there soon if you want to meet us there. Yes Saki is drunk too.” Eunji sighed. “Okay yeah. Meet you there.” “I don’t think you should go in Saki.” Daehung sighed. “You too Yujin, Saya is protected by law from getting in any trouble but it would just be best if you two stayed in the car. Eunji you should be fine. You seem mostly sober.” “Saki made me run up and down the stairs to get Saya water, I’m good now.” Eunji sighed, holding the bag for Saya as she gagged. “I think he’s right babe.” “But-but-”

“We keep you updated.” Daehyung nodded. “Keep an eye on Yujin. She seems like she needs it, okay.” 

“Okay.” Saki sighed. “Good girl.” Daehung nodded, pulling into the hospital parking lot and following the signs to emergency. Once they were there, he pulled to the front and parked, leaving the car on for Saki and Yujin. He went to the back and carefully lifted Saya up, making sure Eunji got her ID. When they went in, they immediately had a nurse come up to them. They explained what was wrong and she quickly got Daehyung to carry Saya to the back. Since neither of them were related to Saya by blood, they made them wait in the waiting room. 

Sai arrived not too long later, the alpha clearly freaking out as she went to the back. Daehyung took the opportunity to check on Saki and Yujin. Yujin had fallen asleep while Saki looked like she was almost there too. “Hey, they took Saya back but they said we brought her in time.” Daehyung told Saki, checking on her. “That’s good.” “Hey have you had any water?” Daheyung asked, bending down to see how drunk she still was. “No.” “Let’s get you some okay?” Daehyung found a water bottle on his car floor and handed it to Saki. “Drink all of this please.” “Okay.” Saki yawned. “Good. You can go to sleep whenever. Sai is here, she has Saya.” “Are you sure?” “Yup, things will be okay.” Daehyung was right in the end. Saya was even discharged a few hours later. After pumping her stomach and giving her an IV, Saya was doing much better. She was half asleep while Sai stayed with her. The hospital insisted on calling their parents since Saya was underage, and Daehyung had convinced them to just call Sana. He knew she was the least likely to be mad, plus she was the only one in town. She answered before Saya was discharged, and agreed to come finish up the paperwork. Saya was completely good by that point, they were keeping her for observation by the time Sana showed up. She was clearly tired as she signed the paperwork. She thanked Daehyung and told him to take Eunji and Yujin home while she handled Saya and Saki. Once he was gone she turned to Sai. 

“Thank you for coming baby.” Sana hugged Sai. “Of course, Dae was the real hero in this situation though. Eunji too. She called me.” “Why didn’t she call me?” Sana sighed.

“I think Saki was afraid of you getting mad at Saya.” Saki was asleep in a chair while they waited the full time for Saya to be released. “But-but-”

“Don’t take it personally mom. Tonight was just a lot for all of them. Saki especially. She will be hung over as fuck and probably really upset when she wakes up” Sai sighed. “They all did the right thing though. I’m happy that Saki called Daehyung and he brought her here in time before anything bad happened.” “So, should I punish them?” Sana asked. “They did do the right thing in the end.” “I don’t know your mom.” Sai laughed. “Maybe just punish them for going to a party and sneaking out, but tell them they did the right thing.” “Maybe..” “Or something like that, I don’t know. Ka-san probably has the best idea of what to do.” Sana glanced over at Saya as she slept, her heart shattering at the sight of her little girl in a hospital bed. 

“Your right…” Sana sighed. “I’m just glad nothing bad happened.” “Me too mom.” Saya looked over at her two sleeping little sisters. “Me too.”

[nyxyooni]

2020 Creator Wrap: Favorite Works

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (or so) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works

Tagged by @i-like-plan-m, callan, why do u do this to me this year has not been my year haisbwiebajavakkakaja. n e ways

1. To Belong, To You

so this is my longest fic ever (it’s still not done tho). its also my first work in the mdzs/cql fandom. it started off as a joke and then sort of blew up? i still love it tho and recently i went back and revised/edited it (up until chapter 5) so that it flowed better. even tho its really self indulgent and doesn’t make much sense in some parts i do love it. i also have so many people supporting me, i love this fic and the love it brought me

2. Alice

OKAY. so u know how some people ship sizhui/jin ling? yeah well i don’t really see it? BUT you know what i do see?? jin ling/jingyi. so after looking for the tag and finding a surprising lack of fics i put my foot down and wrote something. it was fun. it’s also my second work in the fandom ha. again, really self indulgent and even if it doesn’t seem like it (because its mainly just smut) i wanted to write a more grown up and mature jingyi/jin ling dynamic. i’ll explore it more when i write another fic.

3. Heart-Shaped Box

now we move into a different fandom because im an army and im a slut of yoonkook and unhealthy/lovable relationships. so i wrote this. there were so many fucking twists i didnt know where it was going even tho I was the one writing it. it was also the first fic i got my first long comment on. i had actually planned to make it something sweet and non ship dynamic fic but it somehow ended up being what it was. the people who read it enjoyed it and i had so much fun writing it!

4. Remember Me, Even When You’ve Drowned (and decayed)

okay. so this is my second work in the voltron fandom, its a dying breed but also people need juice so i provided. my plans for this fic r a lot more serious than the other fics ive written. its been a while since i updated it but i like it. its got a darker theme, sort of like the one above but its plot is more complex, i have footnotes in my head for it and when i feel inspired i’ll continue it. it’s also a chance for me to be more realistic about a lot of things, especially culture wise. seeing as most people in the voltron show aren’t white. and as a person of color, a latina/hispanic, i wanted to give people in this fandom some actual hard facts when it comes to lanitx/hispanics who grew up or are born in the u.s.a. its mostly from my point of view and research but there should some solid things about it. as well as mental illness because i don’t really like how some people write anxious or “meek” people, since im a person who doesn’t talk a lot i don’t like it when people write it as a personality trait or something that’s applied to a sex dynamic.

5. kill it (before it kills me)

LISTEN. this is the peak of all my fucked up fantasies. its a bjyx work. do u have any idea how much fucked research i did on torture???? i have notes!!!1!1! like irl fucking nOTES. also ✨murder husbands✨ i also love this fic because i love exploring the darker part of my one brain, most of the things that will happen in this fic are manifistions of my intrusive thoughts. i also love exploring the “right” and “wrong” side of morals and how humans interpret that and the way the decide which is which. it’s started off a joke, again, but while working on the second and third chapters it became more heavy, i’ll be taking it as far as i can, as im not the best when it comes to writing my own thoughts. there’s also sex and more sex :).

tbh. a lot of these fics have sex in them. 4/5 have sex in them :))))) and a lot of them are...... questionable...... anywho i’ll tag @corzev and @sunflowergalaxy-hide also @scribespirare

[atlaese]

... you're not obligated to do this... Please this is pure want which is arguably worst. Matt is a character in study indeed. Lmao do you remember when tumblr had the option for fanmail?? And you chose fonts and everything?

He is definitely good at taking notes some self help books might help: how to commit in a relationship, why being in a lifelong relationship is goos for your mental health, etc. Matt read, come on.

Yeah but she is loke he is first serious girlfriend and they are in college when it happens, she has a small part in the comics Im glad they changed that, I hate the fridging trope. She is also in punisher if you don't know, I like her alright. I like them as a trio not as a couple. Im a huge matt/elektra fan if you haven't noticed yet. But you know mostly matt x me is better. I deserve aome love too! Yeah hNat showed up randomly to help him, help her with some cases and things happened, haha. Two gingers together think about it.

Procrastinate all you want we have an open ending anyway! Yeah they are all in it together, again expect for punisher who had different comic runs he just debuted in dadredevil i think.

I don't know exactlt I think it's a neighborhood between Brooklyn and Manhattan, I'll need to pull a map. All i know is that she says its no more than ten streets all togther, and back in the sixties seventies it was a huge ppace with a bad fame but ir changed just like Brooklyn became a rich neighborhood when it was poor Irish immigrants only at first. Meeeen. Where do they hide I wondee? I always went for the shy nerd tupe who didn't have many social skills and im still hwre single so......

Ive never played pool haha, I am not interested on games ngl but their date so hot a s how he used his ears to listen tp the balls? I was screaming.

Oooh a petting zoo and a picnic, sound so romantic! I want a beach date aswell. And a boat ride because I deserve it!

Yes I will haha! Im determined! I ll start definitely tomorrow ☺️ and very good luck on your final I hope you ace it!

mattmattmattmattmattmattmattmatt brain.exe stopped working

okay. oof!! no i just wanted to check <3. but i'm glad you're enjoying this because i am too! it's like a little study break for me, thinking/simping about a fictional man 🤓. i do remember the fanmail, but i never used it? honestly ive been on tumblr for 8 years and up until this blog i only reblogged aesthetic pics and left 😭 i never sent asks or talked to anyone ahha! but yeah i once sent myself fanmail to try it and i was like?? why. i dont understand why this exists. lmao. it was pretty cute though!

anyway

imagine: one month anniversary. you got him a book in braille. it's a 101 for communication in relationships. matt is not amused. secretly he reads it though. a week later he replies to one of your complaints about him being late with 'i hear you, but...'. i dunno if i wanna kill him or kiss him. at least he used one of the techniques. deserves a brownie point. and a kiss.

ooh yes! i actually watched the punisher first, weirdly enough, and i loved karen in that! i'm less of a fan of her in daredevil for some reason? she's just like.. idk. in the way? and her behaviour kinda annoys me sometimes. but i loved her with frank and ii feel like they'd be a better match! ahah, no but matt x elektra makes so much more sense? because they both grew up fighting and being unsure of their own identity almost? because matt was an orphan (? <- like i saw last week his mum just... is the nun) and elektra also is an orphan? they're both always in search of their identity and i think that's why they click so good. also. they're both so hot it's unfair lmao. so yes, big fan here too! but indeed, matt x me/you is the otp! there isn't a better ship in the whole universe i'm told!

lmao i love that nat just showed up. she's a badass.i love her and i hope their time together was fun. they both deserve the world tbh!

yeah i made the weird decision to watch the punisher first so i was SO confused about his backstory, because it mostly takes place in DD season 2. big mistake on my part. don't ask why bc i literally don't know haha. it might have been for ben barnes. also simp material for me whoops!

lmao they make hell's kitchen out to be enormous!!!! i pulled out a map and wow...

i mightve just walked through it without knowing!! damn </3. grounds to revisit ny when the borders open again!

oh do we love gentrification. i feel like most neighbourhoods of ny have been gentrified by now, so hell's kitchen too. it's really sad to see the historical centre and original inhabitants disappear. *puts up fist to the giant corporations*

pls these kinda men hide for their lives i feel like. im sad. *shouts into void*

ooh i actually love pool ahah, but sadly i cant play it a lot :(. but yeah. like he uses. his abilities to his advantage and you know what? good for him! i love him. he can win any time. although i am very competitive so hmm.

ooh a boat ride!!! fancy fancyyyy!! no i love that! especially just boating around the hudson must be nice. i hope it doesn't smell too bad for matt though.

yay, thank you so much!! i hope you have fun on your rewatches!

[emisfritish]

I’ll try every way (part 5)

Summary :  Five times Tine could only show he cared through different gestures,  and the one time he didn’t need to.

Pairing : Sarawat / Tine

Show : 2gether the series

Part : 5/6

Previous parts : Part I / Part II / Part III / Part IV 

Next part : Part VI

--------- 

“Run, run, run, you can do it!” Tine screams towards the field, watching Sarawat swiftly steal the ball from the player on the other team and start running, before passing it along to one of his team mates.

Tine has a confession to make: He didn’t use to like football. 

Before Sarawat, he never quite understood what the appeal of watching boys run back and forth behind a ball to try to catch it was, and he never understood his friends’ investment in the game. After coming to more  games though, after learning more about the sport and seeing the joy and pride on Sarawat’s face whenever he was able to make a successful pass or goal.. Well. Let’s just say, Tine has had to review his stand on football.

He has to admit to himself, his sudden interest in football is greatly helped by the fact that Sarawat playing football is just a sight to be seen. The boy is a fast player, he’s smart in how he approaches his opponents, and quick to assess the situation and pass when needed and it’s just… Sarawat looks so graceful while playing, even with the sweat running down his forehead, that Tine can’t quite keep his eyes off of him. 

And yes, Tine can admit that his eyes had found themselves wandering down Sarawat’s strong legs several times already since the beginning of the game. What could he say… Sarawat was hot, okay ? You’d have to be blind not to see it.

God, he really wished Sarawat was less than stellar at something. Good looking, good at football, good at music, good at kissing… It was annoying. And invigorating, but mostly annoying.

“Come on, that was totally a foul !” he suddenly gets up to scream, when he sees Sarawat fall to the ground, having been tackled, and the referee not doing anything to punish the other player. 

“Wow… You’re really into this whole football thing now,” says Fong who is sitting next to him, and looking at him incredulously. 

The cheerleaders’ presence hadn’t been mandatory at this game, so Tine is sitting in the stands with his friends, enjoying being at the game and watching Sarawat without having to worry about his own performance, for once. Sitting on Fong’s other side, Puek and Ohm seem too into the game themselves to really notice anything Tine is doing. 

“Well, I’ve had to watch quite a few games with the cheerleading team. And I have to admit, they are kind of addictive,” he ends up answering, his eyes still focussed on the field. 

The ball gets back to Sarawat, and the boy dodges through the players trying to stop him. Sarawat is so fast it almost looks like he’s floating on the field instead of running. Suddenly, he  accelerates, seizing the opportunity presented to him by the other team unknowingly leaving him a clear path to the goal, before shooting the ball, and watching it fly right into the net. 

Tine jumps up to his feet and starts cheering with all the other fans in the stand. He feels his heart clench in his chest when he sees the happy smile gracing Sarawat’s lips, and the tightening only gets worse when Sarawat’s eyes land on him, and his smile only gets bigger. 

“We love you Sarawat !”, he hears a couple girls scream two or three rows in front of him, and Tine can’t help the surge of jealousy that rushes throughout him at hearing those words.

He knows it doesn’t mean anything, and that Sarawat doesn’t care for these people. That he doesn’t care for anyone but Tine, actually. He knows, because the other boy had told him so point blank, and even if Tine found it hard to believe that someone like Sarawat could go for someone like him, he was making an effort to believe and accept it, tired of seeing the sad look on his friend’s face whenever Tine seemed to doubt his feelings. 

So yeah, he knows the screaming won’t lead to anything and doesn’t mean much, but still. He wishes there was something he could do to make them back off. 

Suddenly, his eyes fall on his bag, and he catches sight of the white material that can be seen through his books and water bottle. Sarawat’s jersey. 

Tine thinks back to the passing conversation him and Sarawat had had a couple nights ago. They’d been hanging in Sarawat’s room, Tine lying on Sarawat’s bed and telling him all about the disaster that had been his last constitutional law class while Sarawat was moving around his room, cleaning and picking up stuff, when Tine suddenly felt something soft land right on his face. 

Removing said objec, Tine was surprised when he saw that it was one of Sarawat’s football jerseys. When he looked towards the other boy and raised his eyebrows in question, Sarawat had just shrugged, laughter shining in his eyes and wearing the cheeky smile he tends to get when teasing smile.

“You can have it Tua woon wai, all the other players’ lovers have one to wear during games,” he’d said teasingly, before turning around to continue cleaning his room. 

Tine had just rolled his eyes and layed back down on the bed, falling straight back into his story without pausing. 

Since their conversation when Sarawat had finally admitted his feelings to him and Tine had admitted that he wasn’t sure exactly of what he was feeling yet, the other boy had been nothing but patient. He never tried to push him for more, and Tine knew that he was making conscious efforts to not put any pressure on him for an answer.

Still, Sarawat was Sarawat. And the cheesy and flirty lines hadn’t really relented and were just as bad as they had been when they were fake dating. Sarawat apparently still finding immense amusement in seeing Tine get all flustered every time.

“Sarawat !”, screams someone behind Tine, pulling him out of his thoughts and back to the present situation.

When he looks back down towards the field, Sarawat’s eyes are still on him and the boy just smiles before taking a drink out of his bottle of water. Just as the players are called back, Sarawat winks at Tine before turning around and making his way back to the field. 

Tine feels a surge of emotions he can’t quite put a name on rush through him. He’s just so fond of this cheeky, teasing, flirting, beautiful and ever so frustrating man.

He doesn’t know what gets into him exactly, but suddenly, he needs to let the screaming fans and everyone else know that Sarawat is, if not quite taken, then he is… Reserved. 

Isn’t that what Sarawat had said about him, after all ? Wasn’t it only fair for it to go both ways ? 

Reaching into his bag, Tine pulls the jersey out, and trying not to overthink it, he pulls it over his head, the soft material easily falling over his own shirt.

When Tine looks to the side to gage his friend’s reactions to that statement, he finds Ohm and Puek still concentrated on the game that had started back up, while Fong is giving him a knowing look. Still, the look is accompanied by a kind smile on his friend’s lips, which gives him the strength to brush off what anyone else might feel. He shrugs and smiles back in answer, before turning his attention back to the game. 

The rest of the game flies by and before he knows it, Tine finds himself making his way down onto the field, searching through the crowd to find Sarawat and congratulate him on the win.

He eventually finds Sarawat and the other boy smiles and starts walking towards him, before stopping suddenly, a shocked look on his face when he gets close enough to notice what Tine is wearing.

The jersey. Until now, Tine had completely forgotten that he was wearing it. 

Deciding to own it, Tine makes his way closer to Sarawat while smiling softly at him. 

“You’re wearing it,” Sarawat says in awe, and Tine feels a rush of guilt when he sees the hopeful look in his friend’s eyes. 

“I’m not ready yet,” he blurts out, not wanting to give his friend false hope and lead him on, while knowing that he’s not quite where they both need him to be to start a proper relationship yet. 

Sarawat’s smile dims a bit and for a second, he looks kind of crushed and Tine feels his heart break in his chest a little. 

A few seconds pass, before Sarawat seamingly braces himself and nods softly, looking down to the ground and kicking a few rocks he finds there with his shoe. 

“But Salaleo…,” Tine continues, and Sarawat lifts his head back towards him to look at him in question.

“Soon.”

Sarawat looks at him intently, and Tine can see the hope finding its way back into his eyes. 

“Soon ?”, he repeats.

“Soon,” confirms Tine. “After all, you are reserved. I just wanted everyone, including you, to know that.”

The blinding smile he gets in return makes all the death glares he can feel pointed at him from fans all around them well worth it.

[crazedlunatic]

Little Kidney That Could

“I told you not to go out. It’s too cold. It’s too cold now and it was too cold then.”

Matt gave Adrian a weird look.

“What? This is serious, Matt. You passed out.”

“Yeah, not from the cold and but not in front of the kids at school so there’s that. It happened at home.”

Adrian’s eyes widened in the way.

The ‘I can’t even with you’ way that was mostly reserved for AJ and her straight girl crises.

“You’re in the hospital.”

“Okay?”

“With a kidney infection.”

“… okay?”

“You’ve only got one!”

“Oh, you’re right. I must have forgotten about that.” Matt’s voice dripped with sarcasm. “I wondered what that huge scar was from this morning.”

“You have to be careful.”

“You have to let me live.”

“You can’t live if you overstrain your kidney! Sorry but I don’t think you’d enjoy being on dialysis waiting for a donor kidney.”

Matt actually laughed.

“Matthew!”

“The doctor said I would be fine. You’re being dramatic because it’s winter break and you’re bored since you aren’t working until after the new year. You do some version of this every single year only usually I don’t give you an excuse by landing in the hospital.”

“Yeah funny. I was supposed to still be at work and then you called saying we needed to call your doctor in Cambridge and maybe go in.”

“I didn’t call saying I’d been stabbed in the other kidney, was bleeding out, and you needed to probably go 100 miles per hour to get home.”

Adrian covered his face, groaning. “How are we supposed to raise a kid if I can’t even trust you to take care of yourself?”

Matt just stared and him and then laughed again.

“Everything isn’t a joke, Matt!”

“If I could record this and show you it in about a month, you’d think you were being funny too. Ridiculous funny but funny all the same.”

Adrian stared at Matt, opening and closing his mouth a few times.

“You literally asked the doctor if I’d need Dialysis for an infection. You’ve got to calm down. Just because I cough too hard doesn’t mean I’m going to pop my kidney. I don’t even think they pop.”

“If it’s not a big deal, why did you have to take medical retirement from law enforcement?” Adrian challenged.

“Because I could get shot and the city doesn’t want to pay out a lawsuit for that.”

Adrian covered his face again. “It’s not about a lawsuit. It’s about being immunocompromised and—you know what? Fine. Why don’t you go get drunk too?”

“If anyone here needs a drink, it’s you. Trust me. If my mom isn’t hightailing it up here, Adrian, then you have no reason for you to worry. I sprained my wrist once and she insisted being there when they put that stretchy thing on it.”

“You never said you felt sick! You’re supposed to let me know when you don’t feel good in case we have to go here!”

“Oh my God.” Matt groaned.

“How am I supposed to trust your judgement about your health if you pass out? What if you’d hit your head and bled out?”

“Are we worrying about my kidney or my judgement or me bleeding out? I’ve lost track. Not to mention I was nowhere near any furniture and, in case you’re forgetting, I called you after it happened. Jesus Christ. It’s fine.”

“If it were 100% fine you wouldn’t be hooked up to an IV, Matt!”

“Yeah, it’s an antibiotic and not for pain. The only thing that hurts is my side… the side without the kidney.” Matt added.

“I just want—I just need for you to be more careful. And healthy. And everything. I need you here.”

“I won’t be here if you put me in the loony bin.” Matt laughed.

Adrian’s eyes teared up.

“Adrian. Oh my God.” Matt said, scooting over in the bed so Adrian could sit on it with him. “I’m kidding.”

Adrian sat down, head going to Matt’s shoulder and sniffling.

“I’ll be fine, you’ll be fine, we’ll all be fine. I’ll take it easy tomorrow and the next day… but the day after that I may go skydiving.”

Adrian let out a sniffly laugh.

“And you need to calm down about my one kidney. They literally said it’s functioning perfectly. I get bloodwork every six months. You know because now you come to Cambridge with me.”

“Yeah, but that’s mostly because I don’t want to be home alone after…”

“I know. My point is you’re right there every single time they say it’s going great and my whole body—including the one little kidney that could— is going at 100%. Except that time I came with the flu but they had me do bloodwork and a few tests up here after I got better from that anyway to double check.”

Adrian took a deep breath, nodding.

“Don’t worry. I’m taking it seriously. Especially since the birth mom wants to know for sure that everything is okay with me before handing over the baby when he’s born. I’m not risking that. I’m sick but its nothing antibiotics won’t knock out.” Matt grinned. “After we get that baby, though, I may go sky diving.”

“I just need you here.”

“You accepted the ring. You’re stuck with me. Sorry about your luck.” Matt laughed, twisting his own wedding ring around his finger.

“I didn’t ruin Christmas, did I?” Adrian asked.

“Nah. But there’s still time for that tonight or tomorrow.” Matt reached up and ruffled his hair, smiling.

Adrian gently elbowed him. “Jerk.”

[hellafluff]

Bored and thinking about my slasher OC Andy, the Alligator one, and like what her movie arc would look like. The following long ass post details each movie and how good it would be:

Her first movie would be called Gator, releases in the early 80s. It's a suspenseful murder mystery set in Florida that seems to point to the killer disposing of bodies in the swamp for the gators to eat but then its revealed the Killer is killing them with their fucked up teeth so it only looks like theyve been munched on by gators. Andy gets away after being shot a bunch in the end. a solid 8/10 movie, the dialogue kinda sucks

The second movie, which is titled something like Gator II - Birth of a Monster and its a lot like "i know what you did last summer" where a group of now adult friends are being picked off for something they did and it turns out to be Andy seeking revenge for the torment they put her in from her childhood. Andy is arrested in the end but chews through her cuffs and kills the police before escaping. a 4/10, lots of sex scenes between unlikable characters???

Third movie is a clusterfuck, it markets itself as another installment in the franchise but really its a creature feature with elements of the first 2 thrown in. Just called Gator III. HEAVILY rips off Jaws about 30 years too late. The villain here isn't Andy but a congregation of alligators tearing apart a small Florida town, lead by a massive albino gator covered in scars. Andy appears in flashbacks and a house is discovered in the swamp that seems to be where she lived but now is infested with gators. a half rotten skeleton with only one jagged tooth found nearby is implied to be her. 2/10 movie, no one likes it and animals were harmed on set, causing activist pushback

So you know the weird cult plot that happened in the later Halloween movies? The fourth movie, Gator IV - Tooth and Nail does that, retconning Andy's backstory and saying she was groomed by a cult because they see her birth defect as a sign from their demon patron that she will be its vessel. Her remains from last movie are brought back to life in the last half hour as a alligator demon woman that the studio forced the crew to make sexy instead of gross. Effects/makeup for it are practical tho and the movie is considered a 3/10, with some solid kills from the cult throughout and great effects but the pacing sucks and the main cast is awful.

Okay so. Jason X exists, right? Yeah in the late 90s this happens. Titled Sewer Gator. Unrelated to the Andy of the previous movies, a young woman is experimented on in a genetics lab and infused with alligator DNA. She mutates into a fucked up gator woman thats actually gross this time except is 1999 and CGI is the hot new thing and the studio execs cover over all the fun practical effects and makeup with godawful CGI. She escapes the facility and into the sewers of New York where she begins a massacre and continues to mutate until she's exploded with military grade weaponry at the end. a stinger after her death shows she laid eggs but this goes nowhere because the movie makes no money and its never touched again. Surprisingly good actually 7/10, the bluray remaster gets rid of the CG and adds back in as much of the practical footage it can find and it becomes a 8.5/10

The series goes dormant for ten years

The series is rebooted in 2009 with a remake of the OG, except now its called The Swamp. Much more character focused, starting with a herpetologist and a poacher coming to town to help with the alligator problem. Theyre at odds immediately, the poacher insisting the gators need to be dealt with his way but the herpetologist is like "hey these bite marks arent anything like an alligators what the fuck is going on???" the big reveal of the movie is the poacher knows its not an alligator, but his deformed sister who he was keeping locked up until her escape a few years back and he's here to kill her. He's killed in the end by Andy and the herpetologist manages to snare her in a bear trap and get away but when the authorities show up Andy's chewed through her own leg and escaped. 7/10, goes on too long and the reveal exposition is weird and plot holey but audiences enjoy it. Has really good nu-metal on the soundtrack.

The Swamp II comes out 2 years later and sucks so bad. 1/10. The plot takes the Family angle from the last movie and goes full Wrong Turn incest cannibals in the swamps of Florida with it. Weird and creepy and sexual. Andy is there, missing a leg, as the eldest child of this family who serves an insane mother but the movie focuses on her other siblings with their weird deformities let loose now that the "normal" poacher brother is gone. movie heavily implies one of the female characters has sex with an alligator at one point. trash movie, don't watch in a place someone can walk in on you in

Series goes dormant again.

A miniseries drops unexpectedly in 2019. Swamp Diaries. 5 half hour episodes in the style of a found footage film of a group of friends searching for the legendary "Gator Woman of the Swamp." First episode introduces the characters, all likable and well rounded, college age. Second episode is the beginning of the expedition, outlines a lot of the history of the Gator Woman urban legend. Third episode the group runs into actual gators and starts finding weird, Blair Witch esque shit, becoming lost after they have to run from something, the first death happens. Episode four is suspenseful and horrific as the group tries to get home, another person dies. Episode five is the kicker, ending with the reveal Tamara, one of the last survivors, is actually working with the actual Gator woman, her childhood friend who she promised to protect and later on, feed. Ends with Tamara killing the last survivor and telling Andy it's time to go home. 8/10, paced mostly well and very scary, lots of shaky cam but the final twist is a hit with monsterfuckers bc its all but said Tamara and Andy are together.