#but yeah i'm good i just thought that was funny

[earthchica]

Funny How Time Flies

terry richmond x black, fem!/plus size reader

summary: you are a shy, introverted person who wants to break out of your shell and experience fun at least once in your life. During a mutual friend's group trip, you meet Terry and have the best sex with him. Once the fun is over, will you and Terry stay in touch?

warnings: explicit smut (18+), light use of daddy, foul language, dirty talking, dom/sub, oral (f), pussy slaps, fingering, unprotected sex, nicknames (beautiful, baby, baby girl), words: (3k)

note: hey, I'm working on another mini-series, but this one is sweet, wholesome, and freaky! let me know your thoughts and if you want to be tagged in future parts. please enjoy!

-

You’ve been shy and introverted your entire life, often feeling tired of this loneliness. Your daily routine typically consists of working, exercising, and returning home, which leaves little opportunity for social interaction or adventure.

While you go out when you want to, most of your time is spent at home with your loving dog. Despite that, you know something is missing—particularly, a boyfriend and a more vibrant social life.

The anxiety stemming from your shyness made it difficult for you to step outside your comfort zone. You want to seek more experiences beyond the walls of your home and be more outgoing.

When your friends Sasha and Maya invited you on a group trip, you accepted. They were surprised but happy and reassured you that you wouldn’t feel left out or awkward during the trip.

Sasha, in particular, couldn’t contain her excitement, as explained by her boyfriend, Bryce. He was bringing his old marine friend, Terry Richmond.

You met the girls at the airport and greeted them with hugs. Sasha explained that Bryce and Cameron needed to find Terry, which made you feel nervous. She told you a little about him, but ultimately, you would have to form your own opinion about him.

"Oh, here they come! Finally,” Sasha replied, gesturing towards three tall, fit men in the distance.

Bryce was a tall, dark-skinned man, while Cam was kind of brown-skinned since he was lighter than Bryce. Then your eyes led to him. Who must be Terry?

At that moment, you felt an undeniable spark of love at first sight. Terry was slightly taller than Bryce and Cam and had a lighter skin tone.

He was so handsome, with good hands, good lips, and, good god, a nice body!!! He was fine, and you wanna intertwine him.

"Good, made it back on time and found big dawg," Bryce nudged Terry on the arm, laughed, and then moved over to Sasha.

"Yeah, bro was at the wrong damn gate/terminal," Cam said, walking over to Maya and greeted her with a kiss on the forehead.

"My fault; it's been a minute since I've been at the damn airport; y'all know I don't travel a lot," Terry chuckled lightly as he caught you staring, prompting you to look away.

"Well, we're glad you found him. Now...um, Terry, I want you to meet someone," Maya said with a smile.

He raised his eyebrows curiously and she motioned towards you and introduced you to Terry by using your name.

“Hey, there!” He said, giving a polite wave, and you just stared at him. Everyone looked at you, awaiting your response, but nothing came out until Sasha nudged you.

“Hi,” you said, waving back with a small mile. You held his gaze for a moment, feeling a flutter of nerves in your stomach, before shyly turning your eyes away.

The flight to Cancun, Mexico, is currently boarding for its scheduled departure at 1 PM. Passengers are advised to have their boarding passes and identification ready and to proceed to the gate promptly.

"Okay, that's us. Who's ready to get Lit?" Maya clapped her hands, easing the awkwardness and creating a more hype vibe.

Sasha wrapped her arm around your shoulders playfully, giving you a knowing look through her sunglasses.

"Look at you, drooling all over Terry already; I told you he would be your type," She teased, and you playfully hit her arm.

Soon enough, you were all on the plane, and of course, you were sitting next to Terry. He was talking to you, but you felt so nervous that your responses were short.

You both had a lot in common: you were single, didn’t get out much, and were on this trip to have fun. You couldn’t believe that a handsome man like Terry wanted to talk to you despite your shyness.

Terry was eager to talk to you from the moment he first saw you. He felt a strong connection and wanted to get to know you better. He was really glad he decided to go on this trip because your sweet and shy nature made him want to break you out of your shell.

“You're kind of the shy and quiet type, huh?! I like that; some people say I'm reserved, so I guess I can relate,"

"You don't seem like it; you seem like an outgoing person." You look at him for a second. His captivating hazel-green eyes burn into yours, causing a flutter in your chest.

"Well, I sometimes can be both; I'm a little reserved when I don't know the person, but if I know you, I'm more open, I guess," Terry explained, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips.

"What makes me so different?" You asked in a playful tone, building some confidence.

Terry laughs and smirks, "I guess you're that special!"

You felt like your heart exploded the way he looked at you, obviously attracted to you. You just nodded, looking away, trying to hide your smile.

“Hey....come on, I was just getting used to hearing that pretty voice of yours,” Terry said, leaning in, and your breath hitched.

You and Terry chatted throughout the entire plane ride. Although you were still a bit shy, you found yourself being more talkative than before, which felt positive.

Perhaps Terry was just what you needed for this trip. Once your group arrived at the stunning villa, you marveled at its beautiful interior.

“Alright,” Maya announced, her enthusiasm infectious as she gathered everyone to discuss the week's activities. She carefully ensured everyone felt included and excited about them.

Maya suggested you all chill and settle into our bedrooms for the afternoon. You began rolling your heavy suitcase down the hall, its wheels clicking softly against the floor.

“Do you need a hand?” Terry asked, approaching with a friendly smile and ready to help you with your suitcase.

"Yeah, thanks." You said with a small smile, walking to your bedroom door and walking in.

"You can put it right there, " You said, pointing at the chair before you and indicating that he should place it there. Terry glanced at you curiously as if he were too nervous to ask a question.

A moment of silent communication passes between you. Terry stepped forward, closing the distance, and you felt your heart race.

You instinctively wanted to shy away, but you fought against the urge, reminding yourself to be brave.

“I hope this doesn’t sound too forward, but I would love to take you on a date tonight. I am drawn to you and want to crack your shy shell and see what’s inside. Of course, only if you want me to," He expressed with a hopeful smile.

“I would love that, Terry,” You said with a smile. Terry smiled back, gave you his number, and set the date plans.

He walked out, winking at you as he left the bedroom. You bit your lip and excitedly squealed, jumping dramatically onto the comfortable bed.

-

You told the girls about the date, and they were so excited that they went upstairs to your bedroom to help you out.

“I don’t think I can do this; it's been so long since i've been on a date, and all together, I'm shy as fuck” You said, getting your nerves up.

“Babe, it’s fine. You need this, and Terry is an amazing guy. We wouldn't have brought him on this trip if we didn't know he would be perfect for you.” Sasha says, ease your anxiety a lot more.

“Sasha is right; just have fun and let go, but not too much; you might get dicknotized,” Maya smiles playfully as she hands you a sexy yellow dress that catches the light beautifully.

"This will look amazing on you," She added, her eyes sparkling excitedly. As you slipped into the dress, your nerves faded, replaced by a sense of pride.

Maya's perfume filled the room as she sprayed on you; it had a familiar and comforting aroma.

Sasha, the fashionista, was styling your box braids and applying your makeup while you looked in the mirror.

"Remember," She said, glancing over her shoulder, "confidence is key. Just be yourself."

After saying bye to Sasha and Maya, you closed the door behind you and took a deep breath. You were walking downstairs and Terry stood there at the bottom, clearly waiting for you.

His eyes widened, taking in every detail. You couldn't help but giggle at his look of awe. He seemed captivated by your radiant beauty, his gaze lingering on your elegant curves.

“Wow, you look beautiful,” Terry said. You smiled and looked him over, noticing he was wearing a black button-up shirt and shorts.

"Thank you. Um..you look beautif-I mean handsome!" You cursed at yourself in your mind, feeling totally embarrassed, and Terry found it cute.

"Thanks! Are you ready?" Terry asked, holding his arm out with a smile and you happily accepted.

Both of you walk leisurely down the path, arm in arm while listening to the gentle sound of waves crashing against the shore accompanies you as you make your way to the charming ocean-view restaurant that overlooks the sparkling waters.

You and Terry walk inside, and the warm glow of the intimate setting welcomes you. You find a cozy table for two awaiting your arrival. Moments later, a friendly waiter approaches, ready to take your drink orders.

While waiting, Terry struck up a conversation that flowed effortlessly. His warm smile and engaging demeanor made it easy to share about yourself. With every exchanged joke and smile, you found yourself becoming more comfortable, as if he had a talent for bringing out the best in people.

His smooth charm was evident; he made you feel special and understood, gently encouraging you to step out of your shy little shell and embrace the moment because the air between you crackled with sexual tension, growing palpable by the minute.

The waiter approached your table, balancing a tray of drinks that shimmered in the dim light. He set them down before you with a polite smile. After taking your food orders, he left you both.

Terry, his eyes sparkling, leaned in closer, a playful grin spreading across his face.

“While we wait, how about we play a game of ‘Would you rather?’” Terry proposed, the excitement in his voice making the suggestion feel inviting.

"Okay," You replied, intrigued and ready to dive into the game.

“Okay, would you rather…” Terry started, propping his chin on his hand as he contemplated the question.

“Would you rather live deep in the ocean or explore the vastness of space?”

You paused for a moment, considering the options carefully. “Hmm, that’s a tough choice. But I think I would choose space,” You finally replied.

“Mmm, interesting! What makes you lean toward space?” Terry inquired, leaning forward with curiosity.

“I have always been interested in space and astronomy. If I could, I would be an astronaut, and the experience would be exciting,” You said, taking a sip of your wine.

"Wow, I would love to learn more about that, but it's your turn," Terry said, his eyes lighting up with curiosity and a warm smile spreading across his face. The "Would You Rather" game had been going for a while and had taken a slightly naughty turn.

Before long, the waiter arrives with both of your meals, setting them down on the table with a flourish. As the delightful aromas fill the air, you take a moment to appreciate the dishes before returning to Terry.

Intrigued by the connection you two are building, you changed the subject wanting to know about Terry's interests and experiences, eager to learn more about his passions.

Terry paused mid-sentence, his gaze falling on your necklace, which had come unhooked. With a gentle smile, he leaned in close and secured the clasp.

You found yourself momentarily lost in the warmth of his touch, savoring the soft caress against your dark brown skin, a delightful contrast that sent a shiver of warmth through you.

Terry pulled away, a smirk playing on his lips, and effortlessly transitioned back into talking as if nothing had happened. You couldn't help but notice his subtle game; it was working on you like a charm.

Your desire was intense, and your craving seemed to deepen with every word he spoke. You were utterly captivated, wanting him more than ever before.

After dinner, you both walk silently side by side on the beach. Your hands nearly touch until Terry grabs yours and holds it, making you smile.

You slowly look up at him, and you find that his eyes are already fixed on you.

"What?" You asked.

"Just admiring how gorgeous you are," Terry stopped you from walking by wrapping his arms around your plump waist.

You touched his chest, thinking you both would finally kiss. But Terry was teasing you again. He lifted you slightly, catching you off guard and causing you to drop your purse and heels.

“Oh my goodness, what are you doing, Terry?” You gasped, struggling to escape his firm hold on you.

“Let’s get in the water; I bet it’s cold,” He said, trying to pull you closer.

“No, Terry!” You squealed, quickly breaking free from his grasp and running away from him with your tongue sticking out.

“Hey!” he yelled, chasing after you. When he finally caught you, he wrapped his arms around your waist from behind and started tickling you.

You bounced up and down with laughter, trying to escape his grip. Just as Terry was about to say something, he accidentally tripped over something in the sand. Both of you fell together. You looked at him, and he looked at you.

You both laughed as Terry rolled off of you, pulling you onto his chest and kissing the top of your head, making your heart flutter. He eventually helped you out of the sand and retrieved your purse and heels.

Feeling a surge of confidence, you leaned in and pressed your lips against his, surprising him with the suddenness of your action. As you pulled back, a shy smile crept onto your face, and you turned your gaze to the side, feeling excitement and nervousness.

In an instant, Terry reached out, his fingers gently cupping your cheek, drawing your attention back to him. His eyes searched yours, a blend of sweetness and warmth reflected in them.

Then, without breaking his gaze, he leaned in closer, his lips brushing softly against yours as he kissed you, igniting a flutter of butterflies in your stomach.

You let out a muffled moan, feeling his hands gliding over your ass with a gentle yet teasing touch. Your breath caught in your throat, pulling away while feeling him firmly grasping it.

"Do you wanna continue this back at the villa?" Terry asked, his eyes darkened with desire as he looked down at you.

"Yes," you said, nodding firmly as you still held the gaze. Your voice remained steady, even as a whirlwind of emotions surged within you—excitement, desire, and a hint of nervousness mingled together.

-

Once stepped into the bedroom, Terry pressed you against the solid door. His lips met yours in a passionate, rough kiss, feeling an electric spark hit and made your heart race.

"I've been waiting to take this dress off you since I saw you in it," He murmured in your ear, running his hands down the bodice of your yellow dress.

"And it's just driving me wild," He whispered, which made you shiver.

"Well, take it off if you're brave enough," You spoke boldly, which made him smirk.

You gasped as he lifted you in his arms and carried you to the bed. You still couldn't get over the fact that he was so strong to pick you up, which was a turn-on for you.

He picked you down as both of you stood at the edge of the bed; he was kissing your neck, and his lips peppered on your dark-brown skin, pausing here and there to suck on the sensitive flesh.

His hand reached behind your back to find the zipper of your dress, pushing it down to your feet. You step out of it, and his hands touch your exposed breasts.

As you stood there, a wave of insecurity washed over you, causing you to shy away slightly. Just when you thought about retreating and hiding yourself, Terry stopped you. His gaze was steady and inviting, searching your eyes.

"You're beautiful, baby. Don't hide from me!" He whispers genuinely, making you feel warm inside. You kiss him as his hands grip your breasts.

You let out a soft moan, pulling away and popping his black button-up shirt open. You admired his abs and slid your fingers down his chest.

Terry shivered slightly at your touch; you had the same effect on him as he had on you. Both of you practically ripped each other's clothes. You gently laid yourself down as Terry hovered above you.

You pulled him down for another kiss as he cupped your right breast in his hand while his lips moved away from yours. His tongue dragged across the dark area of your areola.

"Such nice big tits, so good to suck," Terry growls and grabs both of your breasts with his hand, squeezing and sucking them, causing you to whimper.

"How does that feel, baby?" He asked, pulling away from sucking your nipples as his right hand traveled down to your wet folds, and circled them.

A loud moan escaped your lips, felt him push two fingers inside of you, prompting you to cover your mouth to avoid being heard by the others.

"Nah, baby girl, none of that. You have no idea how desperate I want to hear you moan for me. If you don’t let yourself make any sounds, I’ll have to find a way to draw them out."

"Yes-yes....ohhhh....It-it feels good....ahh......so good," You moaned, feeling him moved below and rested between your plump legs, glancing up at you. He spread them wide, getting a good look at your pussy.

"Mmmm, a pretty girl with a pretty pussy" He said before placing his hands on your legs and dragging his tongue between your wet folds.

"Yes....fuck....ahh fuck" You moaned, arching your back and grabbing your breasts as he repeated the action with more pressure, his tongue sliding against your bundle of nerves.

"Mmm, tastes so damn good, girl" His hands were holding your wide hips as he continued to suck and lick you dry, drawing desperate soft moans from your mouth. 

Terry buried deeper between your plump legs, which was driving you crazy. The pleasure you were feeling going through your body was so overwhelming.

"Ahh fuck, Terry fucking eat this pussy, mutherfucka" You moaned, and your fingers gently caressed his head, relishing the closeness of him.

Terry chuckles. "Mmm, there you go, keep talking nasty to me, baby. I see I'm bringing the best out of you, the freak in you," He said before resuming devouring your pussy.

Another loud moan escaped your lips as the pleasure built within you, clenching around his fingers while you felt yourself getting close.

"Are you gonna cum, beautiful?" He asked, moving up to look into your eyes and began to finger fuck you fast.

"Yes, Terry, oh shit.....fuck-fuck don't stop fuck." You cried, suddenly cumming hard, eyes rolling in the back of your head.

"Yeah, that's it, baby girl. Fucking cum for Daddy," Terry said, still fingering you and then smacking your pussy as wet gushing came out of you, causing you to cry.

"Shit, look at that, baby. And I did all that with my tongue and fingers; I can't wait to see how your pussy takes my dick" He said with a chuckle, licking his fingers, and you watched him coming down from your intense high.

You kissed him, slightly tasting yourself as he cupped your breast in his hand while your hand slid down his chest to his throbbing dick; you got a good look at it and gasped at it.

"Like what you see?" Terry whispered in your ear.

"Yes, it's so big," You moaned, moving your hand up and down his length as you kissed him again but deeply. A very deep moan came from his mouth when you got a little faster.

"Fuck, girl, I need you…" Terry said with a slight moan, which made you smile. He moved on top of you and slowly entered your folds, causing you to go bananas.

You were loving the fullness of his thickness inside of you as he began thrusting, drawing soft moans from you. Terry asked, looking down at you to see if it was good, but you nodded.

"Come on, baby. Don't get shy on me again; tell me how it feels?" He asked, his hands on your waist sliding down to grasp your wide hips, pulling you closer so he could bury himself deeper.

"Yes, Terry fuck me, fuck it feels good!" You moaned, wrapping your plump legs around his waist tighter, allowing a new, delicious angle that you both liked.

Your moans became louder and more frequent as his thrusts came faster but still as gently and passionately as ever.

"That's it, girl....let everyone know i'm fucking this pussy good, You like it, you like how I am fucking you" Terry moaned while his rhythm never stopped looking down at you with so much desire and lust;

"Oh yes, Daddy fuck me, it feels so good," You cried, looking up at him as he lifted your legs to his shoulders and pounding into you faster and harder but much more profound.

"Take that fucking dick like a good girl;" Terry growled, tightening his grip on your legs.

"....fuck are you about to cum, baby?" Terry moaned, feeling the warmth of your walls, clenched around him.

"Oh....yes, fuckfuckfuck..I'm-I'm cumming-" You moaned, digging your nails deep into his arms and scratching down.

"Fucking let it go, baby."

"AHHH!!" You screamed, coming hard again and Terry wasn't too far behind, cursing, pulling out; your legs immediately fell to his waist as his hot cum spurted all over your belly, making you slightly giggle.

"Shit," Terry cursed, lowered himself, and propped up on his left arm as his head buried in your neck.

He entirely collapsed on top of you, and you wrapped your arms around him. You slid your hand up and down his sweaty back while he gave you small, lazy kisses on your face and neck.

Terry rolls off you, and both of you calm down from your high. You bite your lip and turn to prop yourself up to look at him.

"That was—" You couldn't decide what word to use. It was beyond amazing, it was...

"Mind-blowing, yeah," He agreed, looking at you and lifting himself up to kiss you.

"Up for another round in the shower?"He asked, pulling away and caressing your hip.

"Yes!" Both of you smirked at each other and got out of bed to walk to the bathroom; Terry made you cum two more times that night.

[marshvlovestv]

Oh oh oh, so I've talked before about how incredible it is to see how Double Fine matured in its handling of neurodivergence in the fifteen years between Psychonauts 1 and 2, but you know what else is addressed more sensitively in Psychonauts 2?

War.

The first game talks about war a weird amount, for it not really being the thing that the game is about, and it's all through the lens of insecure dudes in military cosplay (Fred I still love you the most but it had to be said). Oleander got rejected from every branch and now he's made this military fantasyland his whole personality, acting like a drill sergeant around the kids and dreaming up horrible superweapons, and all the while his construct in Lungfishopolis proves he doesn't really understand how the Navy works or how a revolution against the military complex would actually look. (Aside, I still find it very funny that Psychonauts 2 establishes that designing superweapons is just something he does all the time, even when he's good, and Hollis's austerity is the only thing getting in his way.) Waterloo World, meanwhile, has its roots in a real world conflict, but the real world conflict is not Fred's issue; the things casting a shadow over Fred are the mythologized legacy of Napoleon and a board game which is an abstracted mockery of real military strategy.

And all of this, treating the war and military as some abstract fantasy, is just for giggles and goofs. Which is totally fine by the way! Psychonauts is a comedy game and a dark one at that. I don't have a problem with a comedy deriving some harmless laughs from a dark topic. I'm just pointing out that the first game had an odd and irreverent fascination with war so I can say that the contrast between it and Psychonauts 2 is kind of mind-boggling.

In Psychonauts 2, war is no longer some heady hypothetical thing. This game puts an actual, in-universe war at the center of its backstory. This war had real casualties. It tore apart families, displaced people from their homes, left so much pain in its wake that even mentioning the name Maligula is said to cause a massive psychic outcry. Of course, every character in the game who was touched by this war has trauma coming out of their ears. And the villain of the piece is Gristol, the one person who (despite, yes, having associated traumas of his own) doesn't take what happened seriously, the person who wants the war machine that was Maligula to come back.

Anyway so yeah I played Psychonauts for one (1) hour yesterday and the Video Game Thoughts are alllllll coming back.

[cvnntagious]

♱ ⋮ fratboy!chris headcanons ⸝⸝

all my fratboy!chris blurbs, fics, and wips : here

⇢ SFW

✱ fratboy!chris who, of course, met you at a party his fraternity threw and instantly decided you were comin' up to his room at some point, even if it wasn't gonna happen that night

" y'look good "

" me? "

" yeah, you— wa's y'name? "

✱ fratboy!chris who's known all too well by girls at boston university, though, despite contrary belief, he doesn't actually entertain most of them... guess you got lucky?

✱ fratboy!chris who's BU's resident dealer, known by every fiend on campus and more

✱ fratboy!chris who doesn't fuck with relationship labels whatsoever

✱ fratboy!chris who doesn't mess with anyone else, and doesn't want you to either, even though you guys aren't really 'dating'

✱ fratboy!chris who has no problem letting everyone know you're his with pride

✱ fratboy!chris who would rather focus on his lacrosse career than "some shitty college romances", or at least that's how he explains it to you

" and why are you telling me this? "

" jus' thought y'should know... i'on want you gettin' any funny ideas about what we got goin' on here "

✱ fratboy!chris who avoids any conversations about the future, or anything that requires him to even think about committing

✱ fratboy!chris who constantly needs you with him, whether he's just lounging around, at practice/games, or out making moves. ironic, isn't it?

✱ fratboy!chris who doesn't call you anything but mama, not even ma, no matter the occasion

" y'see how crazy you're bein' right now? mama, m'jus sittin' here, see? can't stand when y'do allat whinin' shit "

" don't call mama right now, chris, i'm done with all your fake nonchalant ass games "

✱ fratboy!chris who, even with being admired for his outgoing and charming personality, has such a rotten temper, especially when things don't go his way

✱ fratboy!chris who always says what's on his mind - to you, his friends, random people, anyone - even if it's completely unnecessary

✱ fratboy!chris who absolutely relishes in the respect he has from not only his peers, but the staff as well. humble's simply not a word in his world

⇢ NSFW

✱ fratboy!chris who's big and knows how to use it

✱ fratboy!chris who favors doggy, but can also get down with some rough missionary

" nah, s'okay mama... we'll switch it up tonight, don't worry "

✱ fratboy!chris who likes giving, but loves receiving. the image of your lips wrapped around his length is what helps him to sleep at night

✱ fratboy!chris who's a huge hair puller and thigh slapper (as well as occasional cheek squeezer)

✱ fratboy!chris who will take any opportunity he possibly can to either roll up or puff his joints while you use him

✱ fratboy!chris who makes sure to leave marks. usually where only you two can see, but if he feels like a guy's paying too much attention to you, he'll mark you on your neck or something for him to see

" chris, it's so obvious. how am i even gonna cover this up? "

" don't cover it. i'd like to see m'try an' get in your pants again when he sees allat "

" he literally asked for the material in our class..? "

✱ fratboy!chris who's almost always down for trying something new, but isn't usually one to suggest it

✱ fratboy!chris who loves when you praise him, even if it's unintentional. simple things like "so big," or "so good," really get him going

" yeah, s'good? y'wan more of that good shit? "

✱ fratboy!chris who, to no surprise, is horrible at aftercare.

a/n : i fear this took a lot longer than i thought it would to make... but i'll be making at least one of these for each of my au's since a) i'm unmotivated/don't have time to actually write, and b) want to develop the characters (and some of their pairings) further

-love, grandma cvnty ☆!

[feroluce]

Oh my gosh the way the Pop-Up Shop event ended and what it hinted at that's going on rn, and what it might imply about what's in store for the next time we see Sampo, I'm so excited AAAAAAA

Because it seems it really IS our Sampo, and whereas before I was absolutely delighted by the thought that he was possibly getting fucked with by some outside influence, and that was why he was saying such strange things... There's nothing quite like that going on here. There's no memetic virus messing with his head. There's no imposter, no possession, no nothing.

Just Sampo, and the ominous, all-consuming dread that hangs over his head like a guillotine, as he willingly walks right into what he is sure is a trap. ♡

Because this event was weird right off the bat, yeah? Sampo invites us in on a business deal that won't make him any money? The hell???

And I was just waiting on pins and needles for it to make sense, and oh, I was not disappointed at all. Because I've got a nice meta post about it over here, but Sampo actually DOESN'T make a lot of money most of the time- but he does always get something out of his dealings. He works for favors and good will and networking, but never for nothing. And it was the same here!

Sampo didn't make any money with this little business venture because that wasn't what he needed from it. That was never his goal to begin with. He just needed something entertaining.

Sampo has the key to get into the tavern's basement where Sparkle has been keeping his mask for him, but he still needs to be let into the front door of the tavern itself. The fun stories he got from this event were his entry fee. He leaves at the end because he's probably already on his way to Epsilon, where the World's End Tavern should be.

So that explains part of what was so strange this event. It's the rest of his ooc tendencies that have me like foaming at the mouth though because AAAAAAAAAA

There's long been hints of...some? kind of strain between Sampo and the rest of the Masked Fools. Like it starts all the way back in Belobog's main quest with the big infamous fourth-wall breaking sequence, where Sampo talks some shit.

And it continues in the Aetherium Wars event, where we finally get the confirmation that Sampo is a Masked Fool and even get to see him interact with Giovanni, one of his brethren! And where Sampo talks more shit. He also leaves the trailblazer a warning against Sparkle, who they hadn't met yet, and probably the Masked Fools in general.

And for some strange reason, it seems to be popular fanon that Sampo like. Talks a lot of shit? Or is rude in general? Like I feel like I see a lot of jokes about if Hook says a cuss word, it was probably his fault. But Sampo is actually pretty polite with everyone. I think the only time we really see him be harsh is when he has to set some hard boundaries in the museum event. Otherwise, he conducts himself like a model friendly businessman. Like he IS super shady and slimy, but he's still polite about it. I'm pretty sure the only time he actually talks any shit, and so bluntly, is about the Masked Fools or Epsilon as a whole. He really seems to have some sort of beef with them.

There's also his hilarious relationship with Sparkle, which I'm including for consideration because we don't know how common people like her are in the Masked Fools, so she might represent how Sampo interacts with a lot of them. ...But I'm pretty sure Sampo's grudge with her runs deeper than that anyway jdksajfdkljas

She's so funny I hope she fucks with him more FJDKSJAKD

Anyway, the point is, Sampo doesn't seem to see eye-to-eye with a lot of the rest of Aha's followers. And it was never hinted at before the pop-up shop event, but now I'm wondering if it might be like. An actual dangerous sort of situation.

Because during those brief packaging sequences, you get some. Pretty wild text dropped on you. There was actually a really cool explanation for it by another user already! But basically, all of the phrases are more fourth-wall breakage. They're mostly in-game achievements...except for one.

"This must be a trap create"

We never get to see the rest of the phrase. Just "This must be a trap create."

That is the only one we don't have an explanation for yet, at least as far as I know.

AN EDIT: Thank you to @/kittaykattz for this one, because it looks like someone DID find the source of this line. Unfortunately, it only came up in my search after I looked for the full phrase. I couldn't find it on the wiki before orz And yet this somehow does NOT make it any less ominous ajfdklsjkl The full phrase is "This must be a trap created by a Masked Fool!" and it comes from another in-game achievement, "Boxes and Ladders." Which is really cool, because I had figured the last line must be something from Penacony, since it was the only area not represented so far. So in that way, it fits perfectly with the rest of the text. Now we have one achievement from every area of the game, which fits with the theme that Sampo has been following the Astral Express, the trailblazer specifically. It's the way that it doesn't fit that's the weird part though. Because the rest of the lines that come from in-game achievements are all titles; that's why they were so much easier to find. For some reason, Hoyo saw fit to single this one out. They didn't use a title. They specifically chose the line about falling into a trap set by a Masked Fool, a trap with seemingly no way out, where one's only choice is to take a leap of faith and pray to make it out ok in the end.

Love that. Absolutely love that. That's so fucking tasty, I will be daydreaming for days on end now about Sampo finding himself in a horrible situation with no way out where all he can do is make a desperate attempt and pray to whatever might listen (probably not Aha fjaksljdk) that he'll survive it WHEEEEEE

Because Sampo talks so strangely throughout the whole event, but it gets worse day by day, morose and morbid and dreading and sometimes even almost like he's warning the trailblazer against something about to happen.

I've already lovingly discussed it in an analysis about Sampo's name (alias included) but like. There certainly are some fun connections there. The Sampo of myth was smashed and lost to the sea. Poisson was flooded. Brueghel died suddenly and left a final painting of a storm at sea unfinished.

The Masked Fools are referred to with imagery of water and the sea. And frequently so.

And so I do wonder what Sampo knows, and what he's expecting to happen when he gets to that tavern at the end of the world. If maybe he thinks he's walking right into a trap, and is doing it willingly, doing it anyway, because, well.

Belobog is on the line.

And Sampo has already proven he seems so ready to do whatever it takes to protect it.

[error-dream-was-found]

I just saw your idea about Quackity sucking at torture and I am SO intrigued 👀 Please do tell

(Also I absolutely love love love your writing <3)

Hiii, thank you for asking :)

And I'm happy to hear that you enjoy my writing <3

It's been a while since I came up with that idea and I can't seem to find my notes on it (I found like 15 other half forgotten AUs instead oops) but I'm pretty sure it came from some discussion with Flora.

The basic idea is that everything happens just as it does in canon and Quackity goes to torture Dream. This is where things get sketchy because as I said, this is a 100 % crack idea so ... what if Quackity just somehow managed to fuck up every single torture attempt?

I really wish I could find my notes on this because I know I had some specific ideas written down but let's go with what I remember. During the first visit I think he might've just underestimated Dream who in spite of being in the prison for a while now was still able to dodge Quackity and maybe even disarm him or something just it ends up with Sam having to interfere.

But it's okay! Quackity's got it! It was just a ... a minor inconvenience, nothing more. But ... things are just not working out during his second visit either, nor during the third one or the fourth one.

Dream is totally not giving fuck about what Quackity wants and for the sake of crack Quackity just miserably fails in all his attempts to torture Dream in the most ridiculous ways possible.

Like, he will get his axe stuck in the obsidian and can't pull it out, he drops a harming potion and hits himself instead of Dream, he sets himself on fire on accident (that lava wall had no business being over there!), he fails to realize that Dream is actually good in strategic games and his plan to hurt Dream for losing a game fails when the game drags on for way too long (bonus points if he loses somehow). Just some very weird (and hopefully somewhat funny) stuff happens.

Some time he doesn't even get to try his hand at torture because he gets carried away with wedding preparation and all (just imagine him forcing Dream help with choosing the decorations or something lol)

After his fight with Karl Dream is forced to be the therapist (he has no escape while Quackity cries about the state of his relationship), least to say Dream is very confused why Quackity thought he is the right person to ask about the relationship problems (srsly Q have you seen the state of his relationships???)

At this point Dream himself might try to give him tips, look he is not a fan of getting tortured but this is just sad, okay?

Perhaps he will manage to actually hurt Dream at some point but by then I think he would be too used to failing that it actually freaks him out more than it freaks out Dream himself. Least to say the rest of the "session" was spend fretting over Dream because god man you're bleeding! Dream is just there like ... isn't this what you wanted? And well yeah but also no! (Q has some very mixed feelings)

Overall though I think Q would maim himself in that cell more than he ever did to Dream. On accident of course. I never figured out the logistics of this one but it'd be hella funny if Q somehow managed to idk cut of his own finger or something of the sort which would just end up with him freaking out and Dream having to try to calm him down while also calling for Sam to bring a healing potion

I know that it's supper cannon inaccurate but it's really just a crack idea without any real plot behind it 😅

[blossoms-phan]

tit summary/thoughts/spoilers under the cut!! <3

hiii wanted to make one of these just so I can ramble about everything bc what a crazy night LMAOO gonna make another post about the day so this is just about the show

my soul left my body when the lights went dark omfg, that is literally one of my favourite parts about concerts/live shows. the smoke and lights was a lot but the second they came out it’s like everything cleared up, i loveee how they come out with their backs to us and then the happy silly music when they’re running around saying hi hehehehe

the whole intro/beginning part was so fun i just loved the bits when they were just talking to us, canada love, the history of dnp/why we're all here etc etc. the dolls/diorama is such a fun little phistory recap, though i will say it was not as wild as i was maybe expecting or what they've done on other nights lol. they "wrestled" in the first one, nothing in the manchester apartment, "kissed" (69-ed lol) in the london one and that was it but they were all SO well made (shoutout pj and sophie), i loved phil's hoodie for the 2 apartment era hehe

role model or no-le model: very fun section, i wish i could tell you all the fill in the blanks we did but i can't remember for the life of me lol i shouted yaoi so loud for all of the lawyer dan ones but alas :( but i do remember lawyer dan writes erotica about timbits, then when the side by sides came up on the screens after it had been changed to "Phim Phbits" which made them both genuinely laugh it was so sweetie. we killed regular dan and doctor phil

phanspiracies were: toilet, clothes, tour bus and wedding. honestly very solid picks, it was so surreal seeing those "phan proof" comps of them wearing the same clothes on the screen down to the zoomed in picture of the underwear from the christmas cookies video 😭 the tour bus clip will never not be crazy but it was SO funny bc we cheered so loudly after phil said it was true that they shared the bed and dan was judging us but all i could think about is the stunned silence from phantwerp day one, i will never forget listening to that live and it's probably been so entertaining for them to see the shift from that lmao. the wedding edits were so funny dan was like "i know you had that as your desktop background for 6 years" and someone behind me was like "YES I DID", dan's little kick and cheeky smile at "i'm just opposed to anything traditional" ok sure

i can't remember which section this was during it was something to do with discussing a past era but phil said "maybe I was just horny" and i screamed lmao

the boxing segment ajdjkskjsf i have been waiting for it my entire goddamn life tbh and it was so fun. no one told me about the visuals on the screen ok why do they look so GOOD in them?? i wasn't actually expecting them to knock each other out or anything but it did seem a tinyy bit tamed down from what i've seen before, like they were being very gentle with each other lol but it was cute, the bite was still bite-y and the run around the theatre was craaaazy, the camera following them is so good lol

they yapped for moose. meese. meeses for a minute straight and i forgot it was supposed to be a bit it was so natural they're good at it whether they like it or not

oh yeah that's the other thing. they are fucking INCREDIBLE performers. like, they are so good at what they do and it was one of the highlights of my life getting to experience it irl. the show is incredibly well paced, the script is funny, the audience participation makes it but it's so insane to see how well they work together. the comfort and familiarity after so many years plays a huge part (there was a solid like 7 shoulder touches btw) but their dynamic is soooo good, they play off of each other so well. literally everything @cheekyvank described to me about dan as a performer is true. he was ALWAYS moving, he moves his mouth and bends and grooves and does the absolute most but it's soooo natural, like he has so much fun doing it. that man is a theatre kid all grown up and it's incredibly endearing but he's also a master, like he was MADE to be on a stage, he's so fucking good at balancing between roasting and teasing us and pointing out at people and winking and he called out someone filming without actually saying anything and it was so smooth and lowkey hot but also like jesus i didn't even risk TRYING to take a picture i am sooooooo scared of him. also thanks to you @jonsaremembers i was looking forward to the 4 g's all night, i am their geeky girlie forever and ever 🫶

and phil. oh my sweet precious baby angel. my heart was burstingggg with phil love all night. he is so, so so so good literally everything right with this world tbh. you can tell he has SO much fun on the stage as well, there's moments where his smile softens or he just looks out onto the audience and i want to shower him with love and affection (and we did! i honestly think one of the loudest screams was for "normal phil" during role model hehe). he is so effortlessly funny, the silly little run over to the microphone every time for the "hiatus" was one of my favourite bits of the show. i absolutely loved his getting real with us bit, it reminded me so much of his youtube videos- and i hope he knows how powerful and meaningful that "light entertainment" is for us. his voice was soooo soft and gentle it was like we were his children he was talking to which i guess we kind of are in this context. i love him forever and ever

sister daniel. INCREDIBLE follow up. i knew it was coming and nothing prepared me for Her. another part of the set design/production that is so well done, the visuals and the bass dropping when she comes out is SOOO fucking good. i have never screamed so loudly in my life. i would do anything she asked me to. the underwear were so fucking short i could not see a THINGGG like. fucking hell. lots of pulling the dress down and legs crossed/staying sat the whole time though lol which fair but the confessions and water spraying was fun, it will never not be funny when dan shames people for opening their mouths after they say it's sister daniel's bath water lmfaooo

the SONG!!!!!!!! the most fun. in the entire world. it's so good it's so fun. the lyrics, them going FULL boy band mode, the hands folding over and doob grab was infinitely more devastating irl. dan is so fucking good at the dance i love you forever terminal theatre kid and i think phil has reached the peak of how well he can do it and i want to give him his flowers for trying his damn best every time you keep doing you baby. the part where it kinda slows down and they're just doing the geekiest moves ever like those are my BABIESSS dfjksajdks standing up to rave with dnp in a room full of phannies was the highlight of my entire fucking life.

this was SO much longer than i anticipated and i'm probably still gonna go on about things as i remember it but it was genuinely the most fun and memorable night of my life. i love these two silly little guys so much, it was so surreal seeing them in person after over a decade and i would do anything to experience it again but i'm so, so grateful i got to do it once and i will cherish the memories forever. and this has only made me more insane about them and cemented the fact that i wholeheartedly believe they love us, this new era, and that they're not going away anytime soon so i WILL see you guys back on the internet and hopefully outside of it one day again too <3

(i lied here’s the one picture I took aka far from dan’s prying eyes during the part where they’re not there being gay getting out of their clothes)

[ladyloveandjustice]

Yeah speaking of that I was watching the first season with my partner and assuring them that Sasada chills out after this season and I still think it's extremely funny she accidentally has a character arc in the background simply because the anime staff got tired of the whole "Sasada doggedly going after Natsume about yokai" gag. Like she's really intense about it in the first season, and it's the one subplot that adds this weirdly (mildly) mean edge to the show where the gag is that she's a nuisance, between Natsume just constantly sneaking away from her mid convo when they're talking and her being so aggressive about it.

Then she has like, a couple scenes in season 2 that are much more chill, like when Taki plays interference she actually goes and hangs out with her rather than leaving her alone.

Then from season 3 on she doesn't really bother him about it and she's just a part of the friend group. If you bother to think about it coherently (I'm don't know if the anime staff actually intended this. or thought about it at all) she must have decided that she wasn't getting anywhere asking Natsume about the yokai and it's best to just back off, maybe she even thought 'well it's bothering him and I do want us to have a good relationship so'. (Maybe Taki had a gentle talk with her that one time, since specifically after that we rarely see it come up...ahh...fic idea...i can't go down this road again...)

And the anime doesn't really use her for much, but they make sure to include her in a lot of friend moments, she still has her kind of bossy personality, she has some cute scenes, she develops a friendship with Taki, she's just generally a good friend, and Natsume is friends with two whole girls wow. So yeah, entirely accidental character arc.

I like having her around too, she's cute, and it means Taki has a gal pal like she deserves.

[raspberry-p1zza]

Okay everyone, let me introduce my AU called The Brooklyn Tower.

First, let me show you some of my arts:

This is how I draw Noise! his blue eyes are my headcanon for The Brooklyn Tower AU!

This AU is about Theodore's real life in Brooklyn where he's NOT playing his character "The Noise". And of course, Theodore is the protagonist of this AU, and Peppino will be one of the side characters for Theodore's story.

It won't be a novel/fiction, tho. I'm not a good novel-writer, after all. Instead, I'm going to draw comics/arts of this AU and upload it on Tumblr＆X(Twitter). (Actually I was considering to make this AU into a visual novel game, but I'm not sure if I could lol)

And it's going to be comedic, realistic, satirical, and lot of jokes/humors included. You guys would be wondering why I'm gonna write my story that way. Well... no reasons, really. I just thought it would be funny if I wrote some stories of American-styled comedy for Pizza Tower lol (And don't worry, there will be absolutely no mentioning about sensitive topics like politics. I have plenty of other ways to make you laugh for my pizza-flavored comedy!😎)

Also, there will be three different SHIP/ROMANCE stories with Hazel(Noisette), Peppino, and Richard! You are wondering who is Richard, right? Yeah, he's Doise! His real name being Richard is one of my headcanon for my AU. He has curly hair and he's in the last pic of my arts! :333

So, here are the ships will be included in this AU:

Noise x Noisette

Noise x Peppino (a.k.a Peppinoise)

Noise x Doise (lol)

If you don't like any of that ships, you are not recommended to watch my comics/arts of The Brooklyn Tower AU.

But If you DO like that ships, you are always welcome to visit my tumblr and twitter account! -> https://x.com/raspberry_p1zza

That's it for now. I'll show you more of my AU with my new drawings＆headcanons soon! Cya!👋

[amazingmsme]

That Was Funny. Laugh

AN: I haven’t forgotten about the rest of tickletober, don’t you worry! Here’s day 24 with Max & the nerds! I feel like he would probably try too hard to fit in with them, & it doesn’t exactly always work. But that’s ok, he’ll make it work! Think we all could use a bit of fluff right now…

Things were starting to look up. They were hesitant to say that the prank worked, but at least Max had stopped bullying them, and that was their main goal, so Pete marked it as a success.

The rest of the jocks started to change their tune, following Max's lead, and it had been weeks since he had a swirly or was shoved inside a locker. Pete and Steph were going steady, and the school play was really starting to come together. The Jagerman himself even invited them to the big game to watch him "stomp Clivesdale into the fucking mud." And what do you know, he did!

So things were honestly pretty great. There was just one little problem...

"Sup nerds!"

They all groaned in unison as he announced his presence from behind. He caught up rather quickly, slinging his arms around Peter and Richie's shoulders, the latter flinching at the contact.

"Oh, h-hey Max," he stuttered, trying to play it cool. Max didn't seem to notice, or he just didn't care. "What's up?"

"Oh nothin' much, practice got canceled 'cause of the rain so I gotta fuckin' walk home. Can you believe it?" he complained. Steph couldn't hide her smirk as she answered.

"Yeah I can, actually."

"Shut it, Lauter," he snapped, but it lacked the usual venom his words carried. "You never have to walk anywhere."

"Actually," she corrected, "I'm walking right now." Peter, Ruth, and Richie all snapped their heads to look at her, silently begging her not to say another word.

"Oh yeah? Where the hell are you nerds going? The fuckin' library?" he wheezed out a laugh, slapping a hand on his knee in amusement, although his laughter trailed off when he realized no one was laughing with him.

Steph merely arched a brow and crossed her arms. "No smartass, we're going to Pizza Pete's to win that ugly little doll Ruth's been wanting." Pleading stares turned to annoyed glances as she spilt the beans. The very act of telling Max where they were going was practically an invitation in his eyes.

"Really? Didn't know Spankoffski had his own pizza shop," he quipped, a smirk stretching across his face. That one was good, he had to admit.

And they still didn't fuckin' laugh! Are they brain dead or something?

"Ha ha, like I never heard that one before," Peter rolled his eyes, an annoyed smile tugging at his lips. At least Max was trying.

"Well if you need tickets to win the ugly fucker, I'm great at skee ball," he offered.

"Don't call him that! He's so fuzzy and cute, you guys are just mean!" Ruth whined, clutching her chest dramatically.

"Ruth, radioactive Cthulhu is not cute, he's just creepy," Richie deadpanned. Ruth stuck her tongue out as he returned the gesture.

"Come on you two, those tickets aren't gonna win themselves," Peter prompted, and they began walking down the sidewalk, dumb jock in tow. They all resigned to their fate of backhanded compliments and obscure sports references for the next two hours. Still, it was better than the way things used to be.

Not ideal, but surprisingly tolerable.

At least when he wasn't trying so damn hard. He would go out of his way to be what he considered kind, but was really the bare minimum at best. And Peter wasn’t exactly sure why he thought he needed to be funny for them to like him. Honestly, it was getting old.

Peter, Richie and Max stood off to the side as Ruth and Steph fed their tickets into the ticket counter. A waiter passed by carrying a pizza, and Max nudged them to get their attention, pointing at the restaurant’s signature dish.

“You see that?”

Peter and Richie exchanged confused looks and shrugged. “I guess…”

Max sported a proud, shit-eating grin. “I’d tell you a joke about pizza, but it’d probably be too cheesy,” he punctuated the joke with a deep laugh of his own as they just stared at him.

“I’m lactose intolerant, what the fuck are you talking about?” Richie deadpanned, clearly not getting the joke. Max rolled his eyes dramatically.

“It’s called a joke, dumbass! And it was funny, so you better laugh!” He took a step closer when Richie didn’t immediately comply. “Laugh,” he demanded, deciding to ditch the jokes all together and go for a more “hands on” approach.

“Mahahax! Whahat thehehe hehell?” he asked, thrashing from side to side as he managed to escape Max’s evil clutches.

“Ha! I knew you’d be ticklish! What about you Soanioffski?” he questioned, catching him off guard.

“Wha- me? Max, wahahait!” he cried out as Max targeted him as well. He scribbled up and down Richie’s side while his other hand prodded at Peter’s ribs. Richie flailed around uselessly, shrill giggles filling the air. Peter slapped at his hand, but Max wasn’t deterred in the slightest.

“How come you nerds never told me how ticklish you were? Think of all the fun we could’ve had!” he cheered, shoving his hands underneath both of their arms, eliciting two different giggly shrieks.

“Thahahat’s exahactly why wehe nehehever tohohold you!” Peter whined.

“We gotta make up for lost time then, don’t we? Don’t worry, I can hustle.” They started protesting, shaking their heads and tripping over their words as he wiggled his fingers closer and closer.

He was just about to really strike when Steph came to their rescue.

“Hey, I think we have enough tickets,” she called for their attention, a fond smirk firmly in place.

Max pulled them closer, ruffling their hair as he did so. “Don’t worry, we’ll pick that up again later.”

Y’know… call him crazy, but Peter wasn’t exactly dreading it.

[glitter-sprinkling-capricorn]

I really want to be delulu, I really do. In Delulu Land it's warm and cosy, pink candyfloss clouds everywhere, unicorns🦄, swirlies🍭 and rainbows🌈 and of course Nicola and Luke together in a relationship, happy, after good sex, cuddling in bed. I would like to believe that. ❤️

But I can't.

What follows are my thoughts and feelings, I'm not saying it's true, I've been wrong before...

On 24 October my plane🛩 landed on German soil at 1:45 a.m., I had mobile data again after 7.5 hours and thought: you had the feeling that something was going to happen tonight, but you're an adulting adult now and don't look at your mobile phone.

Then the people on the plane were too stupid to get off. They were all scrunched up at the back, the plane went up at the front and everything stood still. And I sat there with my broken arm, annoyed and exhausted and just wanted to go home.

Then I thought: oh yes... then take a look.

dudumm....

What will I see first? JD and Nic....

You know I didn't notice any sexual tension. Even after NY I was still like: yeah well she got scared... I wasn't worried - in hindsight, I just didn't want to see it.

So I thought: ok JD and Nic then so if they are happy go ahead....

Although to be honest I have a problem with the age gap for various reasons which I can go into if anyone is interested.

But because from the bottom of my heart I am a person who means it when I say: if she is happy, I am happy.

I think JD is a nice guy and I could imagine that they have a lot in common. For example photography, they have the same circle of friends, so why not.

And that doesn't stop me from believing in Lukola in the long run.

Second topic and the reason why I'm writing all this: Luke and Antonia:

I just ignored her for a long time. She was simply non-existent in my orbit, now you know how delulu I can be 🤣

I always thought I was getting weird vibes from her, kind of arrogant, not real, fake smile. And that wasn't someone I would want for Luke. I also thought for a long time that they weren't even together anymore and then her Spain photos came along. I grudgingly accepted it and continued to ignore her as much as possible.

Yesterday I saw a video with her and her friends and I saw a real, lively, funny, friendly girl.

And somehow, without actively wanting to, I made my peace with her. If this girl in the picture is what she usually shows of herself, I can understand what Luke might see in her.

Again, I'm not thrilled with the age gap. But again: if it makes him happy...

And again: that doesn't stop me from believing in Lukola in the long run.

I would like to believe what is so beautifully portrayed in delulu, that JD is just the distraction and that Luke and Antonia are long gone, but....

I can't.

I will always sprinkle glitter but I also have a rational side and it can't overlook certain things.

I had to get rid of that. It all boiled inside me for a while.

[goosewithtwoos]

SOFTCORE

pairing: rooster x reader

summary: breeding kink makes brain go brrr

“Please, for the love of God, tell me that’s the last children’s birthday we’re ever going to.” Your feet were killing you and you were pretty sure the top of your scalp was sunburned.

You had gone with Rooster to Yale’s 7 year old nephews birthday party to be a good supportive mili-spouse but you hated kids and having a group of basically first graders running around you had drained you pretty quickly. You never knew how to act around kids, they were so fragile and you had to watch your mouth, it was always a disaster when they were around.

Like today. You’d accidentally swore in the kitchen when you dropped a fork and hit your head on the counter bending down to pick it up. Lucky for you, one of the little things had heard you and repeated it loudly. Despite your pleas to not continue repeating the word, it had ran outside and told everyone.

The dirty looks from the parents did a number on your ego.

Rooster laughs. “Yeah, I don’t think we’d be going back even if we wanted to.”

You groan in embarrassment, taking off your shoes at the door and throwing your jacket on the stand. Thankfully Rooster wasn’t mad about your mouth of a sailor, he’d found the whole ordeal quite funny, but you were still biting back the shame that came from it.

“Kids are the fucking worst.” You claim.

“You know, I’m starting to think you did it all on purpose so now we really won’t have to go to another party.” He hums.

Rolling your eyes you head to the kitchen. “Oh yeah, one hundred percent. I’m really strategical like that.” He was wrong but it was actually a pretty smart idea. Maybe you could claim that you’d done it on purpose.

His laugh follows you and you smile despite still being mentally exhausted from faking a happy attitude around children all day.

Strong arms wrap around you, head resting on your shoulder. He’s tired, just like you, but for so many other reasons.

Roosters’ command has been working him overtime. It was rare he got a break and yet he still chose to spend his little time off at a birthday party for some kid who probably wouldn’t remember anyone’s face within the next 6 months. It was the little things like that which made you love him more but also made your heart hurt. He needed to take more care of himself yet refused to do so.

"Hi." You giggle as he presses a soft, open mouth kiss to your neck.

He hums against your skin. "Hi gorgeous."

You laugh, wrapping your arms around his. Moments like these reminded you why you married him in the first place. His mustache tickles your skin and you can't help but shudder at the feeling. Your neck has always been the most sensitive part of your body and the way he was pressing against you made your brain fuzzy.

"You really hate kids that much, huh?" He muses. "I bet we'd have some pretty cute kids."

You roll your eyes, rubbing his forearms. "They'd all come out with a full head of hair like you."

Rooster groans, pressing up harder against you, nipping at the skin beneath your ear. "Just think about it." His hands drop down to your abdomen. "You'd be so fucking pretty carrying our kids."

As much as you hated kids and thought they were little parasites, his words did have an effect on you. "You insinuating I'm not pretty other times?" You ask, trying to slow the ache forming between your legs.

"You're so pretty all the time but the thought of you pregnant just does something to me." Yeah your mind was definitely out the window with his confession. You had to do something to extinguish this fire before the rollover killed you.

"Yeah cause swollen feet, mood swings, and insane cravings is definitely what every man wants to deal with." His hands were running all across your abdomen at this point and your knees were feeling weak.

He was getting hard against you despite all of your remarks and you'd be lying if you said that the idea of him being so turned on wasn't turning you on too. You didn't see the whole appeal but having a 6'3 Naval Aviator this weak for you made your already hazy mind turn to mush.

"I don't care about any of that. I'd put up with all of it. It'd all be worth it for you. Your hips," he grabs a handful of your side before moving upwards. "and these," he grabs your breasts, squeezing them gently. "getting even bigger."

It was too late. The rollover killed you.

You turn, wiggling from his grasp, so your chest was flush against his. He grips your ass, pawing at it like a man possessed.

"You better take me to bed before I change my mind." You tell him, wrapping your arms around his neck.

"Then you'd better jump." His cocky grin tells you he knew all along this was exactly what he was expecting to happen. That son of a bitch, he'd probably been planning this the whole car ride home while you were still getting over the embarrassment from the earlier mishap.

You jump, wrapping your legs around Rooster's strong waist. He caught you with practiced ease, lightly smacking your ass before carrying you out of the kitchen and into your room. God, he was obsessed with every inch of you.

You kissed him the whole way, on his lips, his neck, anywhere you could. You were obsessed with him. Every little thing about him made you want him more despite him already being yours.

[notenoughdragons]

so i caved yesterday after *gestures* all of that on the other side of the pond, and bought veilguard (meant to wait till the first bugfix patch is out), and i have thoughts

(spoilers for the first few quests)

fucking adore the character creator. overwhelming as heck but God a+

addendum: why tf aren't there different lip/mouth shapes. we have like 30 eyelash options. i'm p sure da:i had diff mouth shapes

THERE'S NO QUICK SAVE/LOAD OPTION???? why on god's green earth

the photo mode is NEAT (tip, get yourself reshade plus the "mod" that allows hiding the UI, so you can do screenshot nonsense in cutscenes too)

it took me like 15 min to get rid of the quest marker bc that shit is hidden in Two diff menus but oh my god so worth it

on that note, i'm Really enjoying the area/level/dungeon design, and traversing it Without an annoying big blue star thing blinking at you is really good

the environments are just. unhinged in the best way. THE CROSSROADS? D'META VILLAGE?? THE OSSUARY???? perfect no notes

have i mentioned the hair? the hair is really good. i'm a lttle obsessed with the style i gave my rook, i didn't think i'd like it this much

okay let's talk plot bc. uh.

see, on the one hand? so far (recruited bellara and got the dagger and fucked around in the crossroads and am currently getting murdered by murdering calivan so lucanis will murder for Me) it… works for me? like it really feels like getting thrown into the DEEP deep end, but it's a kind of. idk. sensible progression?

and oh my god ghilan'nain. i kinda hate how normal she comes across in the memory dungeon lab? (which. AMAZING QUEST) but also i love that SHE'S UNHINGED, that solas clearly held sympathies for her, the way i YELLED when you hear her voice when that dragon shows up in the blighted village??? amazing

(NO fucking idea how this would play for someone who's not familiar with the series, good lord the amount of exposition crammed randomly into codex cards???)

that being said. how the fuck does this connect from trespasser/tevinter nights. solas what Happened to you. like this is (part of) why i'm Not using saar as the inq in this run, bc even pretending they Weren't madly in love, it doesn't work. i don't think it works for Any inquisitor who befriended/romanced him (unless maybe one who decided to go full scorched earth and hunt him down at all costs)

in meta terms i know why this is happening but How is varric our insight point into solas and the connection to him. even if you're not playing them, this Should be the inq. solas doesn't lose a single fucking word about anyone But the inquisitor in trespasser. it's just this really tragic dissonance y'know

also the way this game is frontloaded is so fucking funny (i am also choosing to find it funny). IMMEDIATELY unleash the evanuris. IMMEDIATELY get solas trapped somewhere so he can't use his not-god powers to help you. FIRST "normal" quest is a horror movie walkthrough of The Most Blighted Village You Can Imagine, like okay! solas spends all of da:i being fucking coy about the blight and now it's like 'the evanuris are blighted. yeah they used the blight for power that's why i trapped them. they got out and immediately start spitting blight everywhere For Power. the REST of the blight is trapped in the evanuris prison. yeah the black city IS the evanuris prison. also blight is alive too. uh what else'

sidenote. did. did no one think it was A Little Weird to frame it like 'solas is trapped in the fade' - 'but not like us! we're also trapped in the fade but in a completely different way!'

i do love the fade conversations, it's got dishonored vibes

(and cut-away scenes to the Villains Having Ominous Convos! i liked that in da:o)

also i have hints turned on and the. the little pop-ups. "solas remembers your verbal jab" THANKS GAME

ACTUALLY SPEAKING OF THOSE VILLAIN CONVERSATIONS. we're just gonna drop into a fucking codex that the lyrium dagger IS the red lyrium idol??? SOLAS CAN CLEANSE THE BLIGHT AND WE'RE NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT IT????

basically. the connective tissue to da:i etc is uhhhh. insane. bonkers, even. but also when i ignore that, it's legit fun??

also good lord i'm glad i didn't try to come up with a super specific character/backstory for this, the faction backstories are Real specific, and rook is written with a v definitive Slant (not a bad one! but there IS a slant)

[unoriginal-starwalker]

ok. ok ok. hold on. this is gorgeous and i need to react to everything.

him being made of silica makes sense, although it's funny to imagine that he's made of styrofoam since that's what his real-life statue was made of on the inside lol

the color-changing chromatophores? so cool! and make a lot of sense with my thoughts of Euclydia and Bill's parents! the angsty possibility that the reason Bill keeps drawing them as only red and blue triangles because he only remembers them as the way they were soon before he 'broke out' of Euclydia - angry and distressed/sad. (i didn't come up with this idea, but idk where i saw it - lmk if you know who did!) it's so funny imagining them like the Boov from the movie Home, involuntarily changing colors based on their emotions - that possibility is ripe with goofy scenarios.

yeah, Euclydian's skin being black makes sense with the Theraprism clothes and stuff, I just think it's funnier if he does wear socks and gloves lol

ALSO YEAH it's killing me that we don't know for sure the texture of Bill's hands!!! In the video "How Not to Draw Grunkle Stan" there's a 3D model of Bill and his hands/arms look kinda fuzzy, but that's far enough removed from canon it probably only counts if you want it to.

oooh coelom! I've just gained knowledge! I love fluid-filled cavities!!

his eyelashes being antennae makes a lot of sense, and the retracting and stuff? very cool. we love making animation inconsistencies into lore - this triangle never has a consistent number of eyelashes lol

DUUUDE. "His lashes get longer and he flutters his eyelid more near Ford, probably because he enjoys his smell." AGSHDFHDSHFDS??? HELLO?????? BILLFORD SHIPPERS EATING GOOD TONIGHT

In the Book of Bill, on the page about destroying/liberating Euclydia, Bill says he hears "this loud buzzing in my ears", so theoretically he does have ears somewhere?

in regards to tasting and having a tongue, as far as I know we've never seen Bill with a tongue in canon, although i do subscribe to the headcanon that he has one

okay yeah the way his limbs and those muscles work makes a lot of sense, both the regular human movement & cartoony wiggly stuff! (also, Ford spotted!) i love the little illustration of him with his limbs retracted in his shell :3

lol i love "fictional geometric shaped people"!

"The guy has a thing for teeth" <- you are so right, he's a freak <3

the way his mouth works makes a lot of sense! it's so cool!!

"I also have no idea whether they have an anus and if it’s just one. This is just something I can’t tell you." <- lmao understandable

oh yeah he does like starch doesn't he? yeah he would not care about it being unhealthy lol, that's so him

oooh yeah breathing between his bricks! dude yeah and the voice echoey thing having an anatomy explanation??? especially knowing that you can recreate Bill's voice effect by copying the audio twice, pitching one higher and one lower! and the 'demon voice' being vocal fry makes a lot of sense too!!

"That's why Bill seems to glow when he speaks - he's actually vibrating." <- COOLEST THING EVER??? COOLEST THING EVER ALERT?????? IDK MAN I JUST THINK THIS IS REALLY COOL!!!!!

finally the us government did something good. giving us info about how bill's blood works

omg the heart diagram is so cool - i don't know nearly enough about cardiology to say how accurate it is but IT IS COOL

i think euclydians being cold-blooded makes sense, i've read a couple fanfics where bill 'photosynthesizes'. i just like characters who are cold-blooded (see: Janus from Sanders Sides) because then you can make them lay on warm rocks in the sun and have a joyous time. i'm normal

i love the complete anatomy chart you made of him!!!! your honor, forget obliterating that twink, i want that triangle dissected!

ok. there were my insane ramblings. i am SO excited for the remaining parts of this!!!! i love it when people apply super scientific knowledge to the silliest things, i am HERE FOR IT!!!!! THANK YOU FOR MAKING THIS MASTERPIECE!

Speculative Biology of Euclydians (and Bill Cipher) part 2

Part 1

So this part is what you've all been waiting for, it took so long, but you'll quickly understand why. This part is:

The Biology of Bill Cipher

As always, this analysis is based on two assumptions:

Before Bill Cipher became a demigod, he was a biological, living organism and so were the rest of his species.

Even after Bill Cipher became a demigod, he still retained some physical characteristics of his biological form.

And a fair content warning: This contains anatomy illustrations. This isn't anything gory, but there are people who are squeamish, so you've been warned.

Click on the images to get better quality!

And without further ado, let's begin.

External structures

Euclydians are animals with a very specific shape. They have a shell in a form of a geometric shape and four limbs. Bill is an equilateral triangle, so my analysis will be just on triangular Euclydeans.

They have bilateral symmetry. This type of symmetry is characterized by having a left and a right side placed like mirror images of each other. Humans and majority of Earth’s animals also have this feature.

Bilaterally symmetrical organisms usually have a distinct head region, because of a process known as cephalization. This process moves the animal’s brain and sensory organs towards one end of the body – the head. Euclydians have a head. It’s the “tip of the pyramid” on Bill and that’s where the eye and other sensory organs and brain are located.

Finally, Euclydeans are segmented. Their segments are clearly visible as those weird brick lines on their body. Bill also often separates his body into three segments. This is a part of his god powers, but it tells us that Euclydeans have three major body segments, I’ll call them the tip, the middle and the base. Each segment contains specific organs.

Euclydeans are invertebrates. And yes, I know this image exists, but this is just Bill’s trolling. He’s making fun of human classrooms where we often find skeleton models. That skeleton wouldn’t even be functional, because it doesn’t have any joints in arms and legs, so it wouldn’t be able to move. And it has a hole where the brain would be, so you know, the fucking brain would fall out.

It was outright stated that Bill has an exoskeleton. Having both external and internal skeleton would be a big waste because you have two systems that do the same thing. Besides, the way Bill's limbs move is much more similar to an invertebrate. His shell is also somewhat bendable which would not be possible if it was made of bone. And the eye-mouth complex that Bill uses to eat would also be completely impossible with a set of vertebrate jaws.

Euclydean shell (or exoskeleton) is nothing like anything here on Earth. It’s most likely made out of silica combined with proteins. I say this because Bill turned to stone when he died and he also likes to eat glass, which is pure silica.

The exoskeleton is made out of several parts. It has a front (ventral) and back (dorsal) part. Both the front and the back part of the exoskeleton are made out of head region (the tip) and three layers of “bricks” which are just segments of the exoskeleton.

The front tip is probably made of more protein and elastic tissue than the back, because Bill has a very expressive “face”. This means that he also has quite complex facial muscles. The back of the head is probably the hardest part of the exoskeleton because it protects the brain. Bricks are in the middle since they have a very important role in speaking and breathing, but also allow the shell to bend.

Can Euclydeans change color, or is it just Bill Cipher using his god powers? Well, since he changes his color on instinct, I think they could! Bill can change color to black, yellow, red and blue. This means that he has a complex system of chromatophores – cells that contain little sacs full of pigment. When the sacs inflate, the body appears to be the color of the largest sac, whilst those deflated are invisible. Color changes depending on the pigments contained in inflated sacs. In Bill, the pigments are red, blue and yellow. Yellow is the standard color, it signifies neutral or content emotional state. He turns red when he's angry or wants to look intimidating and blue might signify fear, despair and cry for help. Black is the color of Euclydean’s skin, so when they look black, it’s because all pigment sacs have deflated and the transparent shell allows us to see the skin underneath.

And yes, Euclydeans have black skin. I know some people say that Bill wears thigh high boots and long gloves, but to me, that doesn’t make any sense. Like, that image of him in Theraprism is showing him with clothes over his supposed gloves and boots. Why would they make him wear sneakers over boots? And why baby Bill has yellow hands? Well, that’s something I’ll tell you in the next part where I’ll talk about babies.

Anyways, the skin is black, but we have no idea what it feels like. Seriously, so many people shook hands with Bill and nobody wrote down how his skin feels like! But we know that he has fingerprints. That means that he has very sensitive fingertips and that those little paws were made for grabbing things. Also, Bill doesn’t have any growths on his skin: no nails, hairs, scales etc. I know a lot of people love to draw Bill with claws, but he doesn’t have claws, not even in his most eldritch form. His fingers always remain small and soft. The legs have no fingers and the skin of the sole of their feet is probably thick.

Internal Structures

Coelom

Coelom is one of the most important organs, that you probably don’t know you even have! It’s a fluid filled cavity whose role is to separate internal organs from the muscles of the body wall. This allows organs to move and grow independently of your muscles and it also protects and cushions them against impact. In humans coelom is complex and it’s made out of pericardial cavity (around the heart – allows heart to pump blood), pleural cavity (around lungs – allows lungs to expand while breathing) and peritoneal cavity (around digestive system – allows for expansion and movement of digestive organs).

I believe that Euclydeans also have some form of a coelom. Coelom is even more important in invertebrates, as that’s where their immune system is and it can also serve as a supportive hydroskeleton. Since Euclydeans have a hard shell, they need the protection around their organs. Every shelled animal on Earth has coelom for that reason. They also need room for the food they eat, since the shell can’t expand and their limbs can enter the shell, so they need room for that too.

2. Nervous system

Euclydeans have a vast range of emotions, capability to communicate using speech, body language and even color shifting. They are as intelligent, or more intelligent than humans. They have a highly developed eye and other senses and all of this requires a nervous system. We saw Bill’s optic nerve when his eye got pulled out during Weirdmageddon, so he does have a nervous system, but I can't tell you how exactly it looks like.

There’s one part of Bill that I bet is similar to human - it’s his brain. Bill claims that he can take control over any being a long as they have neurons. This is his god like power, but then, why just beings with neurons? Well, most likely, because he has neurons too and kind of understands how they work. Maybe his brain even produces similar neurotransmitters as ours, so we’re easy to control with them. The brain is in the tip of the pyramid, slightly above eye and it likely has a lot of neurons and a very complex structure. I can’t tell you how exactly is his brain organized, but since he's bilaterally symmetrical, it’s very likely that it has hemispheres. He likely also has two neural cords, like most invertebrates, and those run down the dorsal (back) side of his body

3. Senses

Euclydeans have camera lens type eyes. Now here I can only speak of Bill, since we haven’t seen any other Euclydian. Bill’s eye is large, placed in the center of his “face”. It has eyelids with “eyelashes” (more on them later) and produces tears (Bill cries after his break up with Ford). The pupil is slit and vertical and there is no iris. However, there are muscles that can change the shape and dilation of the pupil. The eye looks similar enough to human that I can confidently say that he has cornea, lens and sclera. The eye is filled with refractory fluid and has some form of retina in the back. Bill’s eye changing color and being used as a projector or to shoot lasers are all parts of his god powers, however, it is possible that his species has a tapetum lucidum, a reflective layer of cells which help animals see in low light conditions and also makes the eye glow in the dark. Bill has color vision and he claims that he can see every part of the electromagnetic spectrum, but I think that's a part of his god powers. However, Euclydeans definitely could see in color, since their alphabet was basically a color code and they also use colors to express emotion.

Since Bill has fingerprints, we can confidently say that his fingers are the most sensitive part of his skin. Bill can feel through his shell too, just like every shelled organism ever (that's why he used Ford as a backscratcher). Tactile senses are very primitive, so Eucliydeans could feel cold, heat, pain, pressure, vibration and everything else just like we do.

Bill has a sense of smell and he even says which scents he finds attractive. This could mean that sense of smell plays a big role in reproduction of Euclydeans, but where is it located? Well, on the eyelashes. Except, those are not eyelashes, they are antennae. Bill has total eight of these antennae, 4 on lower and 4 on upper eyelid. They are very soft and sensitive, so he can retract them inside the eyelid. He does that when he feels threatened, so it’s probably a fight or flight response. His lashes get longer and he flutters his eyelid more near Ford, probably because he enjoys his smell. They are also located close to the mouth, so that’s how he samples the scents of the food.

Euclydeans have great hearing. They communicate vocally, sing, Bill can play the piano, so obviously, they hear. But I have no idea what they use to hear. It could be the bow tie, since it does look vaguely ear shaped, but it's possible that the bow tie isn't actually an organ. In that case, they could have an unknown structure inside them or they could just use their thin exoskeleton to catch sound vibrations.

They taste using their long tongue.

4. Muscles and movement

We have seen Bill’s muscles and they are striated skeletal muscles like mammals and insects have.

As the shell is kind of bendy, there is a lot of muscles underneath it. Those are the muscles of the body, they also move the face and bricks while speaking. The limbs have muscles too and two kinds at that.

When Ford shoots through Bill’s hat (which also a part of him) it is shown that inside of it are strange bone-like structures. These are not bones, since they aren’t articulated, but muscles do connect to them. They kind of remind me of echinoderm ossicles, but they don’t really look like them. This is another fully alien structure and I’ll call them anchors.

You know how Bill’s limbs can both bend just like human arms and legs, like he has elbows, wrists, knees and ankles, but they also bend like goofy rubber-hose cartoon anatomy? Well, that’s because there are two types of muscles in them. There are muscles attached to the anchor points and subcutaneous muscles.

Anchor points are located in the same places as joints in humans. Muscles that attach to them are long and strong and they are used for regulated, precise movement. The subcutaneous muscles (the one we see in his Weirdmageddon image) are used to bend the limbs in every other manner. They are not attached to anchors, but to the skin, so they resemble muscles of octopus arms. They are shorter and less strong, but when they act together they move the limbs in coils. These muscles are also responsible for squishing the limbs inside the shell when they are hidden.

Bill has incredible control and dexterity of his muscles, especially in arms and fingers. Even though his paws are soft and small, he can use them pretty much as efficiently as humans use their hands.

Possibly the strongest muscles in Bill's body are his jaw muscles, so let's talk about those jaws.

5. Eye-mouth complex and the digestive system

Having your eye used for feeding seems wild to us, but this adaptation is seemingly common in fictional geometric shaped people, as it has convergently evolved in Flatland’s inhabitants as well. And, speak what you like, but Euclydeans can’t choke on their food, so they have it better than humans.

I don’t know what Flatlanders eat, but Euclydeans are definitely predators. Now, I know that Bill sometimes depicts himself with human like teeth. The guy has a thing for teeth, especially molars, but he doesn’t have mammalian teeth. In every image where he opens his mouth that was not made by him, we see that he has cone shaped sharp teeth, like a predator. These teeth are great for biting and subduing prey, but they suck at chewing. Euclydeans can’t chew, so they they feed by swallowing chunks that they bite off, or swallowing their food whole if it’s small enough.

Here I depicted how this “eye-mouth complex” functions:

Euclydeans have a stomach in the middle of their body, but I have no idea what goes after it. My best guess is that they have a branching intestine. Our flattest organisms (flatworms, sea stars and brittle stars) all have this type of intestine. It basically means that, instead of just going like a tube, the intestine branches into different parts of the body. I also have no idea whether they have an anus and if it’s just one. This is just something I can’t tell you.

Since Euclydeans are capable of eating a lot of various things, I expect that they have accessory digestive glands (that’s liver and pancreas in humans). Strangely, despite the fact that his anatomy indicates a predator, Bill likes eating starch (pasta, empanadas, sandwiches etc). Most carnivores are unable to digest starch, so I went with god powers, but he ate sandwiches when he was a kid and had no god powers. So, we have two options. Either Euclydeans are omnivores (which, with those teeth, I doubt) or the animals on their planet store their excess calories as starch, not fat, so predators evolved the ability to digest it. If the second one is true, then Bill eating pasta is like your cat eating pure butter. It’s probably not healthy for him, but I don’t think he’s a guy who would give a single crap about that.

6. Breathing and speaking

In The Book of Bill, Bill says that “dumb trapezoids and rhombuses were sucking up his rightful oxygen”. This means that Euclydeans are aerobic organisms – they breathe oxygen. Their skin is dry, so they don't use it for breathing and they also speak, laugh and sing. All of this tells me that they have lungs.

I believe that their lungs are located near the base where the bricks are. The gaps between bricks have little tracheae that lead to the lungs. Bill most likely breathes in from his back side and breathes out from the front. The air is probably forced to travel through small crevices inside the lungs so that it can exchange the oxygen with blood. We don’t know whether Euclydeans exhale carbon dioxide, but they probably do, since they can eat our food, so they probably have similar metabolism to us Earthlings.

Since Euclydeans can speak and laugh, they probably have some kind of a diaphragm. In fact, I think they have two! Their voice has an echo, which means that, most likely, their lungs don’t always expel air at the same time. Air expelling causes the bricks to vibrate which produces sound. That’s why Bill seems to glow when he speaks – he’s actually vibrating. This action is also controlled by muscles. Depending on which row of bricks is vibrating and how many of them are involved, Bill changes the pitch and tone of his voice.

And the growling noise? Well, when Bill uses his demonic voice, he is doing one of two things. He is either using his god like powers to modify his voice, or that’s just how Euclydian vocal fry sounds. If you don’t know what vocal fry is, it’s produced when the vocal chords are vibrating slowly and they become out of sync. This produces a very specific sound and that sound can be made voluntarily. That’s how Mongolian throat singing works. Similarly, Euclydeans could slow down the rate at which their bricks vibrate and make them out of sync to produce that menacing “demon voice” as a threat display.

7. Circulatory system

We know how Euclydean blood looks like. It’s silvery and kind of seems like it glitches. It also contain chemicals that can make humans sick. This means that Euclydeans have much different blood from animals on Earth, but it certainly serves the same function. It’s used to transport nutrients and oxygen through their body.

Since the agents from The Book of Bill were able to draw his blood, it’s clear that Bill has a circulatory system and a closed one at that. The closed circulatory system means that blood vessels end in capillary nets and don’t open inside the body cavity like they do in molluscs and insects. If the agents used syringe to pull Bill’s blood and he had an open circulatory system, they could actually collapse the entire thing as they would pull his organs as well. That’s why I believe that he has a closed circulatory system.

Closed circulatory system requires a heart and I believe that Bill’s heart is located between his lungs, like ours. I have no proof that his heart looked anything like in the illustration, but I looove cardiology, so I did all this just because I wanted to draw a weird heart. I don’t think Euclydeans have a super complex four chambered heart like we do, they most likely have two or three chambered heart. The heart separates lung and body circulation and regulates their blood pressure.

The capillary nets are all located in important places: lungs where they exchange oxygen, intestines where they absorb nutrients and brain where they feed the neurons. Euclydeans have a rather large brain, so it probably uses most of their calories and oxygen.

8. Other systems

I can’t tell you anything abut Euclydean excretory system. I don’t know whether they produce urine or not, if they have kidneys, nephrocytes or something completely different. I genuinely have no idea.

They have to have an immune system because they are multicellular. Every single multicellular organism including sponges and plants has some form of an immune system. I believe Euclydeans have something similar to coelomocytes - a very common type of immune cells in invertebrates which reside in coelomatic cavity.

I'll talk about reproductive system in Part 3!

Are Euclydeans warm or cold-blooded?

This was a very tough one, because they could be both, but I am leaning more towards cold-blooded. They have very little muscle mass and heat is produced within the muscles via trembling or metabolic heat (heat released in various chemical reactions in the body). When an animal has very little muscle it isn’t used for that. Even mammals like sloths who have significantly reduced muscle mass become dependent on the surrounding temperature. Also, Euclydean flat shape can easily distribute heat they absorb, so they wouldn’t need to waste energy making their own. On top of that, Euclydeans don’t wear clothes, which can be a cultural thing, sure, but they could also not wear clothes because they need their skin exposed so that it could absorb heat.

Here's how Bill Cipher's complete inner anatomy looks like:

There, I hope you enjoyed this! I'll see you hopefully next week to tell you about Euclydean reproduction and development.

Thank you @ok1237 @unoriginal-starwalker and @chrystalitar for your support :D

(Also, I hid Ford Pines in one of the anatomy illustrations. Can you find him? Click on the images for better quality!)

[graciousdragon]

sorry i came back for a day and then disappeared again for a week and then came back and reblogged 4 posts of dimension 20 and cult of the lamb myth of consensual sex

[hinamie]

in spite of everything, I had fun <3

[screwpinecaprice]

@glowweek Day 5 FAMILY | FRIENDS

Peridot and specially Lapis do not trust the racoons.

Specifically chose this angle so I don't draw feet. _(:,3」∠)_

Mi own connverse kids Ebony and Rohini are there! And technically Sakura and Zachary. (Please until now I don't know what else to name them. 😭)

And sorry the older Maheswarans aren't there. I don't know where to put them and I already had character overload. 😞

Hibiscus print on Bismuth's shirt is from ManMadeOfGold!

Speaking of shirt, another thing I avoided was thinking of their outfit designs. 😅 It's somewhere a little over a decade of timeskip since SU:Future and I'm sure at least one or two would've reformed during the time. So I'm gonna say they wanted to keep the vibe of a casual outdoors picnic-type event so they wore the casual themes.