#but yea.... it is not looking good for my generation or millenials

[diss-track]

Too many women my age and younger are too busy crashing out over needing to be married and have kids, like it is not the 25-33 year old women, it is the 15-24 year old girls doing A LOT and failing

[fourhornedsatyr]

As an avid fan of Mike Pondsmith's Cyberpunk setting I cannot help but just look at the year 2024 in the US and be like: Yea Mike, you were a little off and a bit ahead, or a lot, but like holy fuck the internet and cyber tech has been so misused and is now the tool of corporations to fuck us over.

First off, phone phishing??? I have spam filters and still get 2-5 phishing phone calls a day that, if I do pick up, try to trick me into giving away my voice and data. This has become so common that literally no one I know answers a call unless they know the number or are actively awaiting a call from an unknown number (for job interviews, appointments, etc).

We, on the regular, deal with AI that is meant to steal our voices, names, and other cruical data. This has brought us to manage unknown numbers the same way we manage superstitious entities such as fae in fairy tales. How fucked up is that?

Streaming, once an alternative to and then a replacement of video stores, has come to replace TV and is severely less consumer friendly as access to media has become severely fragmented by the corporate nature of these services. I won't even get into the decreasing quality of popular media, just simply look at Disney to see the shift.

Social media? Something that was meant to connect family, friends, and community? Yea, that's now a sespool of ads, has algorithms that will try to feed you misinformation, and has been made into an addictive drug meant to keep people seperated and inactive in the freetime that we have.

There's come a large group of people in my generation (gen Z) and those who came before us (Millenials), who simply do not pay for our media. Piracy of old and new movies, shows, videogames, music, and even books has simply become the norm because we cannot afford to pay for it, and what we can access on the corpo sites has been severely reduced in quality by easily evaded ads.

And what do I have to say to that? We live in a capitalist society and we gotta play the game to live until we break it. They can't create a product that we're willing to use? Boohoo, someone outcompeted them by providing us with a product that removes ads that only serve to degrade, seperate, or comodify us. Corporations act like they deserve our subservience, money, and labor -- they don't.

Moving on from just entertainment and social media, search engines, our phones, and nearly everything we have to access the internet is used to track us and sell our data so that we may be comodified more efficiently by the corpos. We may say "I'm gonna google that", but many of us have stopped using google and other engines because of how bad they are at actually giving us good results. Task specific search engines and ones that don't track or sell our data (like duckduckgo) have become common place.

Also, just, most people do not own their own media? Some people don't own a single movie, show, song, book, videogame, or any other digital media and instead opt to stream them (ie spotify) or purchase access to them (ie steam). I know very few people in my generation who own a cd player or any type of physical music, and it just throws me.

The internet and digital tech could have been so much better and can do so much good, but no, it's used for capitalism instead.

Wage theft, job theft, piracy, and phishing.

Down with the capitalist system, let's bring on a future wherein our art, knowledge, social forums, and automatons are not weaponized against us so that we may share the resources we need to survive, thrive, and live fulfilling lives.

[voidwolfmilf]

Ok ok ok ok ok I finally pinned something down:

The reason why I don't understand or partake in the whole, "Omigosh, this creator did X super problematic thing in 2013, so they're terrible and bad and you should hate all their content and not engage in it!" mind set is that like... Every example that I have seen of that has been things that people have since either apologized for when called on it, or things that they themselves called out and have shown to make progress to grow from.

2013 was almost a DECADE ago... and I've drastically grown from who I was last year at this point, and ten years ago I still thought I was a mortal boy. So I am more than willing to acknowledge someone's past and move forward.

And I am very willing to give people the benefit of the doubt on a LOT because.... all the stuff that I see people trying to call out and shit is stuff that... I saw a LOT of people in my high school and/or online friendgroups do ages ago.

Were they good things? No. They ARE/WERE problematic jokes that we were too young and stupid to really understand why we shouldn't make them. This is the closest to really going into specifics I am going to get, but they were absolutely things that now would get alllll of us cancelled.

The biggest difference is that all of that existed in places that aren't public. Versus others who, either via mishap or misjudgement, ended up very blantantly online and available.

But now all of us, at least that I still have contact with, admittedly, have grown up and realize/recognize that we we're shitty back then and have grown.

And I am willing to give that benefit of the doubt to others.

Is it always deserved? No. Life is nuanced and complicated.

Sometimes people change far for the worse, like JKR who used to be, by the standards of the time, a pretty decent person. (and I do have a thing that I think anyone can be redeemed if they try to be better so if she pulls her head out of her ass and works to undo the damage she's caused, cool) This wasn't even inspired by JKR so I'm moving on.

The point being is that I believe everyone can grow and get better, and I'm not going to condemn someone for doing the same things that I've seen others do and grow from, just because those I know personally did those things in places unavailable to the internet, vs the environment now where people are more likely to share those things publicly.

Think critically, look at the person NOW, because you don't know how they may have grown if you only look at their past. If they're STILL being shitty, then yea, probably write them off.

Otherwise, remember that most of us who grew up either alongside the internet (Millenials I think is that generation?) or older, probably did just as many fucked up things when we were kids. We just have the privilege of THAT not being public.

[liz-and-the-blue-bird]

Good Evening to me

Ah, I haven’t had much to talk about for a while. 

Suggested Soundtrack. 

For the new followers, titles mentioning the time of day and then a read more are just long personal posts. You can see more here as I usually tag it “monologue”, though the last one was almost two years ago. I should probably make a more recurring tag or something, something more distinct, because monologue is full of other just long rambles at this point. This started when my previous ex broke up with me 3ish years ago now. 

I’m packing right now. I seem to always write these while I’m packing. I guess looking at things I’m going to bring with me on a journey makes me think of my own journey thus far. 

I’ve been working at my first real job for about 2 years now. They’ve been... long years. And I can’t remember a thing from them. I remember changes at work, but they don’t matter much. I remember people coming and going, but they also don’t matter much. At least to me. I remember doing different projects, moving between chairs, setting up my computer each time. 

But they don’t matter that much. 

I think that’s what working is all about. 

And that really worries me.

When I read through my old long personal posts, these sort of... journal entries, I realize how disillusioned I am with this job and really with all jobs. It’s the kind of general ambivalence that symbolizes my generation. 

I remember reading a reddit post of a baby boomer asking why millenials want to kill themselves. When I saw the title, I laughed, but then I gave that kind of sad smile you give when you know it’s true. The top comment said “we don’t really want to end ourselves, we just don’t feel any particular attachment to staying alive.” or something to that effect. I agree. That’s kind of how I feel. 

I learned recently that one of my online friends has a girlfriend. It affected me much more than I expected. Not... surprised or anything, he seemed the type of get one easily (probably not the right word), but more so that it reminded me of what age I’m supposed to be. (Hey you, the one with the girlfriend, if you’re reading this, don’t worry about it.) 

The people I work with are all 28+, most of them being 50+, and the 28-ers are married. I don’t they’re happily married, but they’re married. I haven’t been thinking about getting into a relationship for a while. 

I really miss it, I guess. 

It’s not even me missing that relationship, it’s more like me missing trying to get one. I haven’t had options for one (yea....yea...........) for a long time now. And for the most part, I didn’t mind. I always considered it like this: If I would be happier alone, why should I try to make it work? So most options that presented themselves made me just look at them and go “I’m sorry, but... you’re not worth it. 

But it feels like I was suddenly thrust with the idea of actually finding someone who was worth it. I hadn’t been reminded of it for a long time. But now I just suddenly feel very lonely. 

I used to have much more female friends than male friends. I don’t know why, I guess I jelled with them better. Even in chat rooms (of course, predominantly male, given the type of anime I watch), I feel somehow off balance. I remember making a joke once about how I’d reread chats, especially 1 on 1, and pat myself on the back to say that I deftly navigated the social interaction. It was barely a joke, to be honest. I feel very uncomfortable, quite a lot of the time. 

I’ve been working on the video, almost frantically. When I’m at work, I think about it. I plan ahead. I think of clips. I try to remember my script that I’ve already recorded. I prepare future videos. 

It feels urgent. It feels like the way out. The way to make me like living again and find friends again. And I have no idea why I think that. I guess it’s because I know some people can make money off it. And they live much more balanced lives, or at least have the opportunity to. 

I want to travel. I want to meet people. I want to be self employed. I want to live in a small apartment in a big city. I want to walk a walking trail that’s measured in days rather than minutes. I want to do parkour. I want to take photos of mountains taller than I’d ever imagine. I want to try living for weeks at a time with only one backpack full of clothes. I want to do so many things. 

But life is so short. It’s too short. It’s so short that I almost feel like it’s not worth trying to do all these things. Not even to try anymore. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore. 

And now I just kind of want to die. In the ambivalent way, of course. 

I guess I’m supposed to finish packing. 

[queen-savilene]

Good fiction is just the truth being coy. At least, that's what everyone says. Everyone who reads, that is. The others probably don't read much and they certainly don't write. But there's where we run into a problem:

When all you want is to write what amounts to a philosophical or political parable. Fiction, but discussing modern politics.

A book that's been written every year, basically. Always changing as the hot topics of the day change and as writing conventions change. But at the end of the day, it's still just a book, and if you did a great job writing it then it shouldn't read as much more than an entertaining work of fiction even if your big bad everyone hates took their ideology and actions straight out of history class, a lá Nero or some such.

People miss the point. At least, that second group does, and when 55% of my own mayonnaise-kin of the feminine persuasion decide to vote for someone who masturbates to the idea of being the kind of "strong man" our grandparents stormed Normandy to fight. So, the point is getting lost somewhere in the sauce, or just not read at all.

It feels paralyzing. An entire generation is feeling crippled, right now. How do we even care about our passions when the world is on fire? Roads literally melting in Australia. The rise of fascism. Looming war, both civil and abroad.

But no, just write about some fantasy King who grooms his daughter, hurls insults at statesmen of both his own country and his allies & enemies, and relies on his advisors who are nothing more than sleazy con-men who can't actually lead the would-be king or the country.

I suppose it would make for an entertaining story, but it's one I've lived, and one I've read, and one I've watched. I don't want to write about it. Maybe five, ten years ago before things got so heated. But now we the frog have been boiled, and instead of writing about places other than the boiling pot, maybe let's write about the pot itself so we can think, yea?

It's telling that this personal, non-fiction writing is the most I've done in at least a month. It comes easier. I'm not being coy. I'm not writing some coded message about how the world is ending before our eyes and, while to say that no one is doing anything would be factually wrong, not enough people have emerged from their apathy like a butterfly from the chrysalis.

Maybe talking about the truth, clearly and without obfuscation, is what we need now. Sure, it isn't "entertaining" to talk about these issues. But as a Zillenial, slipped in between the bottom end of the Millenials and top end of the Zoomers like some deliciously Sapphic sandwich, it isn't particularly entertaining to consume the ten thousandth thing written by a panicked writer trying to clue us window kickers in on the dirty little secrets of the world, like that it isn't all kittens and indictments out here.

I've been reading a lot, or at least more than I used to. Currently I am reading Parable Of The Talents, the exceptionally well written sequel to Parable Of The Sower. They're bleak books written in the 90s, part of an unfinished trilogy but work as standalone. I love them.

I also hate them. They're depressing. They are only set in the 2020s and beyond, a look at a collapsing America 3 decades down the line after the author, Octavia Butler, witnessed Reagan's politics start to destroy this country. Now we can trace back the ills contaminating us and find them rooted in Making America Great Again, as Reagan wanted, as Trump wanted.

At one point in Talents, the narrator/pov character talks about how people are turning a blind eye to illegal Christian re-education camps because the camps are collecting vagrants (we aren't told why they're poor and homeless, but it is almost certainly not their own moral failings). These legal land owners are afraid. Not of the vagrants that might steal what little food the landowners have, just so that the vagrant doesn't need to starve. No, the land owners are afraid because the vagrants are a reminder of what the land owner could become.

Talents is that vagrant. Books like Talents are that vagrant. The one I'm afraid of, because they remind me that there's currently a SCOTUS discussing ripping rights away. Making my very existence as a lesbian transwoman, or a transbian as some might call me, illegal. I didn't choose this. Why would I? I may be murdered for the way I was born, why would I choose this depressing existence?

So yea. It can be hard to write when it feels pointless. When any warning would go unheeded, or arrive too late, or just not involve the level of Direct Action we need to survive the looming American Troubles. Because if we avoid that civil war then we're probably not for the miracle-case solution of "Okay let's stop oppressing minorities, give people food, homes, and health care, and stop destroying the planet." Call me a cynic, but if they were going to just stop all that they would have. And asking nicely just tells them we can still be ignored.

I don't want to be ignored, I don't want to waste my time. I don't want reminders of how little we are doing, and I don't want to feel like my "contribution" to mending this fucked up world is the same half-measures that lead us here. We're in a radical new Era, and we need radical new ideas such as actually talking about shit for once.

[bridgetlynn]

american assassin.

I feel like I should open this with a simple fact - I’m not a Dylan O’Brien fangirl. I watch Teen Wolf - yes...but I watch it cause my old roomates always had it on in seasons 1 & 2 and it became habit to watch after that. The Maze Runner movies bore me to tears and I’ve seen them each once and only once. Yes, I think the kids talented (and good looking - I’m not blind) but I’m also almost 10 years older then him and his presence in a movie isn’t enough to make me run out and see it. I’m pointing this out because 3/4 of the stuff I’ve seen on Tumblr about this movie is filled with “zomgdylanissohot!!!!” This is not that commentary.

Ironically, if anything (in this case) I’m a Vince Flynn fangirl.

When the reviews for American Assassin started coming out this week I was a little surprised at how badly the movie got panned - mostly because Michael Keaton is in it and the man doesn’t usually make stinkers. Also, the novel (and the entire Mitch Rapp series) by Vince Flynn is fantastic. 

The reviews weren’t (entirely) wrong. The story itself was, frankly, ridiculous and full of holes you could drive a truck through. I was nervous when I heard they “updated” the novel - but assumed they just meant that it wasn’t set in the 90s. Apparently, “updated” actually translates into “taking the vaugest idea of the plot of the novel and chopping it into bits and pieces to make an hour and a half popcorn movie.�� 

Considering the movie feels like a throwback 90s action flick the writers (all 4 of them through subsequent rewrites over the years) might have been better served by actually just sticking to the original storyline and keeping the timeline acurate to the novel. Instead it feels like each “re-write” was more like a cut and paste of what had already been done...and each subsequent writer didn’t factor into how to tie the threads fully together when they were finished.

Considering a few reviews of the movie I saw refrenced it as being “borderline racist” and “insensitive” the director might have gotten away with more if it was politically skewed to past events rather then current ones. But that’s the super far left liberal millenials who aren’t even old enough to fully remember and process 9/11 being “Triggered” and “needing a safe space” because they “accept everyone no matter what”. Rather then “accepting” that there are terrorists in the world (and yes, the majority of them are radical Islamics) who would like nothing more then to blow the United States and any democratic nation off the damned map.

That being said - most of the fault in the movie lies in the weakness in the script/story rather then the actual directing and acting. 

Michael Keaton is always great - and he’s a little tounge-in-cheek/wink-and-nod in this. It feels like he had fun making the movie. 

Taylor Kitsch was...meh. There were parts when he was very good (he does better in supporting roles then leads anyway) and there were times he felt like a caricature of the “token bad guy”. 

Dylan O’Brien however was absolutely fantastic. I was actually kind of surprised by how good the kid was. To the point where I really wish there was more for him to do and meatier stuff for him to dig into (again - the fault of the story). There were too many huge swathes where his acting was all (only) physical work and expressions - and as challenging as that can be normally in this film it felt more like Tom Cruise lite. 

Where the movie really shined was in the interaction between Michael Keaton and Dylan O’Brien.  This movie (if the were going to completely go off the rails of the original novel anyway) would have been better served being a more character driven piece. An hour and a half that fully delved into Rapp’s transformation from graduate student to CIA operative, with maybe a smaller mission here and there throughout the process to spice up the flick, would have been 1000% more interesting (in my opinion). Since the ending is screaming, “Hey! We wanna make a franchise!” the studio could have saved the high impact “action flick” for the next title (especially considering that the “next” Rapp novel is actually a much older Mitch Rapp anyway). 

So yea, it was fun. But it was empty calories. It won’t hurt Keaton, people are used to Kitsch making crappy acting flims and (hopefully) the general public (and casting directors) can see through the crappy plot to see that O’Brien has some real chops.

[bornconfused444]

What was the last strong emotion you experienced? Boredom.

Who was responsible for it? Just me I guess.

Do you post the results to your surveys on any other website? No.

When people fill out your surveys, do you read their answers to your questions? I don’t make surveys.

Which do you dislike more: taking pills, or the taste of cough medicine? Cough medicine. Pills don’t faze me. <--

Name three bands you would love to see in concert: Alice in Chains (when Layne Staley was the singer), Amy Winehouse and The Beatles. All are not possible though.

If you could have the answer to any question, which would it be? Does it ever get better or am I just wasting my time? <-- that’s a pretty good one can I go with that one?

What is the most annoying task you have had to complete in the past week? I don’t know tbh/

When was the last time you canceled plans? What came up, if anything? I don’t know.

Do your hands ever get sweaty when you hold someone else’s? Yea.

Does this embarrass you? Nope.

What goes through your mind when you’re engaged in a passionate kiss? I mean I tend to think about some pretty random shit tbh.

Do you ever wonder what other people think/daydream about? Nah.

Do you ever wonder what animals think about? Yes.

If you’ve made a mixed CD before, what type of music did you put on the most recently made one? I’ve never made one. I never learned how.

Do you think there is a point where someone is too fat for a bikini? Yes.

Why or why not? Because there is.

Do confident people ever annoy you? Sometimes when it’s more obnoxious behaviour than confidence.

What about negative people? Yes which is ironic because I’m pretty negative.

Would you say that you are more confident in yourself, or negative? Negative.

Who do you think has it harder in terms of expectations regarding physical appearance: men, or women? Women.

Elaborate on your choice? Men have the pressure to have big dicks and big muscles girls need big boobs big ass small waists nice smile nice hair.

Who is the most emotionally strong person that you know? I don’t know.

How about the most emotionally weak? Me. <-- same.

Think of your favorite book/movie/cartoon characters. What do they all have in common? They’re depressed and troubled.

What do all of your favorite celebrities have in common? They’re hot or British.

Is there a reality show you would consider being on? Real World.

How would you portray yourself on this show? Just how I am. Shy at first then weird and loud when I’m comfortable with people.

What was the last word or phrase that you screamed? I don’t know.

Have you ever cried in the shower? When was the last time?

 Yeah I don’t remember maybe like 3 weeks ago.

Has a survey question ever offended or insulted you?

 Nope. I don’t get offended easily I’m not 90% of millenials.

Has an answer to one of your questions ever offended you?

 I don’t make surveys.

Has anyone ever insulted your survey-making ability, if you make them?

 I don’t make them.

When was the last time you felt too hot?
 Last night.

When was the last time you shivered?

 Yesterday.

Do you feel comfortable spending the night at other people’s places?
 Not really unless they’re a good friend. <--Even good friend’s houses I feel kind of uncomfortable spending the night at.

Or would you rather they stayed over at yours?

 I’d rather they stayed with me. <--

Do you spend time online when your friends are over?

 Sometimes like if we’re both looking at memes or something.

Do you spend [too much] time texting when you’re around others?

 Sometimes it depends on the situation.

Do you watch anime? If so, what do you watch?

 No.

What would you recommend?



Who was the “bad guy” in the last book you read?

 I don’t even remember what book that was.

Did anyone die in the last movie that you watched?

 Moana? Her grandmother is the only one I can think of. <-- Same.

When was the last time you saw two people in love?

 Yesterday.

When was the last time you saw two people fighting?

 Like 2 days ago.

Is there something you are afraid others might find out about you?

 Nope.

Can you recall the last time you blinked?

 Now.

Who absolutely disgusts you?

 I don’t know.

Do you keep up with current events?

 Some.

What is one emotion you never want to experience?

 Mourning.

What was the last “sin” that you committed?
 Sloth I guess. <-- same.

Do you believe there is a “right” or “wrong” religion? Explain?

 Nope.

Have you learned anything new today?

 Nope.

Do you learn something new everyday?

 Probably.

In general, is learning something that you enjoy?

 Yeah if I’m interested in the topic. <--

On a scale of 1-10, how interested are you in the world around you?

 2.

Do you ever watch educational documentaries?

 Sometimes if they’re like psychology ones or like freak show type physical abnormality ones.

Where was the last place you went against your will?
 I don’t know.

What is the longest you have ever waited for something?

 I don’t know.

Was it worth the wait?
 -

Have you ever purchased something expensive, only to realize you didn’t want it as badly as you thought you did?
 Nope.

Around which subject(s) did your last conversation revolve?

 How gross it is having to clean up hairballs.

What is something people assume about your country of origin?

 That we say aboot. I’ve never heard anyone in Canada say aboot ever in a serious conversation. Or that we all live a higher IQ than the people in yours.

Can you guess another person’s nationality just by looking at them?
 Sometimes unless it’s one of those people who is like half Chinese and they sort of look Asian but their eyes don’t. I feel like that sounds racist but really, that’s how people judge most stereotypical Asian people right.

What nationality(ies) are you? Is it obvious, or subtle?
 Canadian but my background is French and English which isn’t obvious in my appearance other than the fact that I’m white.

What is your favorite song to dance to?

 I don’t dance. <--

What is your favorite song to listen to while driving? Whatever I’m in the mood for. <--

Do you listen to music while you fill out surveys? How often?

 Sometimes.

What are you listening to right now? If you’re not, what did you last listen to?

 Come as You Are.

Is this song by your favorite band?

 Not my favourite no but I do love Nirvana.

[misterbitches]

@flootweed ​

ATOTS

That's super fucking romantic? Like tragic but in a nice way. i love that shit. i'm a monogamous slut for romance pghiosuag even tho we have to learn to live alone too but it's just like the NOTION is nice?!??! awwww i told my mom that SOPHIE's gf was like "she died taking a picture of the moon" and how it was like idk. the gf was just processing it and she thought it was romantic and my mom was like "wow.....depressing" bc think she thought it was stupid millenial shit i was like no mother doent u see she died in the BEAUTY LMAO but then i told her jessica walter's husband died the year before and then she died and she was like "aw...kind of romantic" LMAOOOO i guess two people have to die. why did i tell this story? i am so sorry. the show ended today right (ep 10?) i didn't realize it was that short. so i hope it was a happy ending? (tell me) i understand why you love the atmos! it's like, not really been done. there's this BL that i hear isn't too great but it does take place in a rural part of thailand and there's way less budget. a lot of ppl seem to like it. ep 6 LW / LW in gen gotta be honest, rushed through it. i knew spoilers from jump cause BL spoilers are just absolutely nothing and sometimes ur just like i need to know. i do not understand the ~silently lookin 4 u~ trope it always backfires and is also DUMB. so happy about tiffy. a girl who likes girls but ends up with a man bc of mommy and also the man is ok....it's me. she's gorgeous and actually [h*lf] gay so it's great. god ok i feel so old again. lmaooo but i was like obsessed with lady gaga for that reason (dont ask...also how i got kinda popular on tumblr way back in the day) and shes just absolutely fucking beautiful and bad ass. (which kind of doesnt helpcos they r all skinnty but that's FINEEEE) right? i mean like i guess cos we knew abt it? i can see why he was so pissed off, too? i mean i'm so fucking like...sensitive to being told what to do so i was angry for him from jump. i guess i was also looking at it different wholetime cos i knew the spoilers? i'm assuming u did too lmao. so we knew hed be pissed and leave. and frankly that's what sib gets. just for you my friend i will watch it and update. i think MANY times in shows in gen but it is something you notice a lot in BL bc they are just absolute novices most times. in this case, gene's actor mostly well (and i like him as a person just cos he was on that thai 3 girls in a car show and used to date on eof them lmao) can act so i will look over that scene to see how sib's actor plays off him. but the pausing in between sentences or for so long even decent actors or actors doing better. kao is not bad, not great so they will talk slowly because dramatic acting but the problem is most times it's too long. even if the person is an adept actor it won't always work and YES THEN THAT MEANS THE EDITOR COMES IN AND SNIP SNIP SNIP! it's too long. and sometimes it just does not work even if you can act. but it is GLARING when they cant or are average (someoe said this about tharntype and my god lmao tharn..is...so...slow...in...talking...the actor idk his name it's one of em, the other one with the nose (type) is....different not better but he certainly does not talk as slow. they arent bad but they are not good so.) also sometimes they are forgetting their lines. some ppl find this charming. clearly we do not lmao. what is their relation? what is going on there? i don't have a problem with stepbrothers as long as they didn't grow up with that sibling bond. many times blended families really have to watch out for that kind of fraternizing but it's always when theyre older and teenagers bc they didnt grow up w/ each other....i mean they have chemistry so i'm whatever. but. hennYYWAYYYS.actually it's bc im an idiot i didn't read it as Mhok (singular) and aey's father. Yes and his sister who i think i may hate? im like bitch okkkkkk but. his name is lhong. and he is a psycho. i mean so is type. so. oooh it could be that he stole! but also i'm pretty sure cos hes gay lol or did they

not make that explicit? the thing is i had to skip through most of that scene too because the drama was WAY too much for me. too much. lmao. the sister thing i got and it made sense and iliked that. oh yea he is gay and they know. that's a big one.

WBL

haven’t watched color rush! did you like it? i have seen wyel, parts of mr heart, and ofc to my star :) 

ohhhhhh ok. i get you. yea he definitely wasn’t being ooc cos i think that....what u said. and also like....ugh i cant even think rn. i like sam lin a lot so i like gao shi de but i gotta say. lmao. hm. first of all. yes it is creepy what he did. it’s fucking weird. and sad that his whole life revolves around him. it’s not as fucking weird as LW but still like when he did the door thing. i was like UMMMMMMMMM cos i really didnt want it to be constructed. and when it was i was like imma suspend my disbelief. but if anyone dared...

and so what he did in s2 i think he just couldnt realize that he was loved back which is why it’s good he WAS ALONE for 5 yrs imo. but he gave shu yi 0 choice and for that i am pretty sure i would be even angrier. i do think though that the father’s role is pretty important but i can see how the show is like....letting that go? bc as fucking weird as GSD is, he was still like...20? i guess and shu yi’s dad is like. crazy? i am also like he really had to fucking start a company to get noticed like are u joking? is it also that easy? and also why? lmao i just. ugh. i think that probs bothered me the most...priorities.

i like the show! well idk if i love it but sure. i think it’s decent lmao. i understand what you’re saying. for here it bothers me less but i certainly don’t think it was OOC. immature and stupid but like...that’s.....what they are. i also don’t have a problm with the timing from a technical point.

however, when i started the show? i had NO clue what concept of time it was. and that was very annoying. tehy redeemed it bc of the comedy aspects (the first time shu yi sees shi de is so fucking good, i really loved the shot and editing; it’s hilarious and silly) and i started to go with the flow of the show through that. but the fucking concept of time in the show in general esp with repetitive outfits (i understand that they are more likely to wear multiple outfits as well, it’s just that you have to split it up or it i sconfusing visually and looks like the same scene twice or just a full day of shooting which it could be but then something should change in the clothes. this is just an ex~~*~*) and partof that is they have this already controlled narrative i guess. 

i have to admit as well...i skipped episode 1. and most of 2. i was like i rly dont want to see someone slap a pereson even if they were like. not together. it’s just not cute also not in front of ppl. and then when they were yelling and bla bla i was like listen ladies lets calm down. too much angst in a boring way. what they have now is good. also they should probably like estrange the father but i doubt they will. 

i cannot make up my mind totally now bc i see what ur saying i guess i just don’t feel that way as much but i guess i have to think about it more, too. i do think he was contorlling in getting him or like when he didnt want shu yi to find out whwatshisface liked him. i guess for me it would be if he is still that way in the rship. but even tho he’s at fault for what happened, i’m also like but his dad? but also like...did he try? why did he just stop contacting? but then i guess he emailed everyday? DO U C MY QUANDARY.

alsoi have to say i do not care abt their backdoor being opened lmao like wow business? no thanks

LMAO. did they cry a lot in UWMA? i only know the teamwin parts. which one is fluke the really pale one who died? idk what it is about that kid but i just cant watch him. it’s not his fault it’s mine.

DUDE i still dont understand the husband and wife thing and ive looked into it multiple times. ive kinda just classified it as one of those things that make me uncomfortable but arent problematic lol. it you have any insight about it id love to hear it tho !!

it’s stupid. that’s what it is (husband and wife.) it’s just something they say like many gay couples may use pejoratives in conjunction with them, the f word etc. or even imply something about being a top and a bottom. whatever. but these arent gay spaces or gay storylines. sure gay men may direct them but since BL operates and relies on patriarchy without a doubt and also stereotypes poorly kathoeys or won’t cast trans women in anything substantial and use them as jokes (and see this is one of those things where it’s like...ud never see this in the US tho like our concept of third gender or kathoeys but life stillBOOOOO.) so it’s just useless when they put it into the scripts because it’s for people to consume and lots of girls are. obviously. so the idea that if you are being penetrated and u r the wife and this is used like literally anywhere but not from gay or whatever men is gross. are cis women’s vaginas sieves to them? are trans women not women? do we have to categorize people by PHALLIC OBJECTS IN OUR BODIES SPECIFICALLY A WOMAN? it dont make no sense. plus really most ppl just experiment, there’s more ways than one to have sex, we have lives so most times it’s not just full penetration for hours anyway. it’s just so gross. like oh that’s really funny lol ur the wife cos his dick goes in ur butt XD i get it, same. i say “i’m wife’ whenever there’s a penis in me. fucking kill me. it’s not a big deal but it’s just dumb and gross. if they use it they could try and subvert it too like i like how my engineer has  a whole absurdly stupid episode about it. but in TT the dad says “if ur the wife i wont accept it” and i was like u know what gals? im good. goodbye.

pgojaihousgajigko THAT’S SOOOOOOO OOWIEOFUGHOIJ WEIRD. FANDOM IS REALLY WEIRD. i have read rpf and written it once upon a time but dont do it anymore  uch. i mean it’s weird. no doubt about that. invasive, weird, strange. but very unreal anyway. it is. plus i dont like celebs or fame and think of it as a gross capitalist scheme so i had to stop (also so weird?) but i know very many people like lean in. lean in. LEAN IN. this youtuber i watch did a video on like insanely popular ships (like that 1d one) and their insane fandoms and i just couldnt. it’s so embarrassing? and then they’re so bold????? about it? 

yea it would be cool (more queer men or visibly we should say or like out whatever.) but it doesnt necessarily mean that will be good or beneficial i guess? i mean like. i dont know. so much about the genre is about wish fulfilment for young girls. its literally selling some fantasies because the other thing is for BL (i read a paper on this...) esp for girls in more conservative societies they cna maybe replace themselves in the character? but they may not feel a threat as a woman or like their life will fall apart if they engage in sexual things with anyone really. and that’s where i’m like....for a lot of these are they just writing a story and just replacing two men? bc they also seem to think it owrks like that. and in a way that’s what it is bc of the writing and how they use certain terms. you can tell the piece is about pushing a product and less about the real affects of a story. i think ITSAY is a great example of a really intelligent great piece of work that contains multitudes. and the girl was amazing. it just depends on the goal. and for most of the ppl the goal isnt...to do anything. so i dont know. idk how to talk abt representation anymore. it both is and isnt.

 i really liked tingting from my engineer a lot (idk if u have seen) she’s so fun and unapologetic. i love how much she drinks and if someone tells her to be ladylike she says no. and i appreciate that in the show when girls were rude to her she said nothing about the girls but said “NO IM NOT LUCKY TO HAVE ALL MALE FRIENDS?” i really want to see her more in the next season. obviously tiffy is goat. super excited to see how their rship develops.