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barnesandrogersfanfics · 5 years ago

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Saving Grace - Part 10

Summary: Steve leaves you and your son to go back to Peggy unaware your pregnant.

Your heartbroken and struggling without Steve until Bucky Barnes steps up to help you out. With you and Bucky growing closer everyday will he be your saving Grace?

A/N- This was meant to be more of a filler part but then ended up at 2000+ words! 😂😂 im not even sure how i feel about this part but here we go! Enjoy 💕

The Wednesday before Bucky and I were planning to head to the cabin, he was called in for a mission that required the whole team so it must have been pretty bad. He promised he would do his best to get back in time so we could still go up there, but i knew we'd just have to let things play out and see what happened.

It was now Friday evening and he still wasn't home, i hadn't heard from him since the Wednesday evening and i just wanted to know he was okay.

At around 10pm i decided to head to bed to try and get some sleep, at least then i wouldn't be constantly worrying about Bucky and the team. Grace was fast asleep in her bassinet beside the bed and Harrison was star-fished on Bucky's side of the bed snoring slightly....I couldn't help but smile at the sight. When I heard a noise from downstairs I shot up in the bed suddenly alert.

"Buck?" I called out quietly so i didnt wake the kids, i knew he'd still hear me even with how quiet i was. When i got no response i made my way out to the hallway looking down over the staircase railing. My heart started racing when i saw two dark figures moving around down there. I turned and silently rushed back to the bedroom locking the door behind me. I grabbed my cell phone from the bedside cabinet and called 911 as i rushed to my wardrobe to pull out the lockbox that held our guns.

"911 whats your emergency?" A woman answered my call, i quietly told her what was happening and gave her the address. She advised she would get someone over ASAP. I hung up and dialled the compounds private number hoping someone would answer, maybe they could get here quicker!

"Hello?" A man answered on the third ring, i didn't recognise who it was.

"Hi, this is Y/N Y/L/N...."

"Oh hi Y/N its Roy, the night guard"

"Shit.... Roy is their anyone there you can send to my house now!?? there's men breaking in.... are any of the team or any SHIELD agents around?"

"Oh.... erm I'm not sure. Stay on the line and i will check real quick".

It felt like he was gone forever when it was only a few seconds.

"Y/N???!"

"Steve??! Oh thank god! There's men breaking in!!"

"What?!!"

"Two of them that i saw. Ive locked myself in the bedroom with the kids"

"Im on my way sweetheart just stay where you are. You have your gun?"

"Yeah, please hurry!" I said hanging up.

I carried Grace's bassinet into the ensuite bathroom and then went and got Harrison and took him in there too.

"Mama what you doing?" He asked sleepily rubbing at his eyes.

"Shhhh baby, i need you to stay in here with Grace and be very quiet okay?"

"Okay" he nodded and sat on the floor beside Grace's bassinet.

"Remember to stay very quiet, and dont come out until i say so" i closed the door and took the time to check my gun over. Oh god, what i would give to have Bucky home right now, he would have taken them out already without breaking a sweat! It had been years since i had retired from the Avenging life, the day i found out i was pregnant with Harrison was my last day on the job. All i was worried about was my kids getting hurt, what if i was too out of practise to defend myself against these intruders..... my internal panic was interrupted by the sound of heavy footsteps coming up the stairs. I heard one of the doors open, the guest bedroom probably as that was closest to the stairs..... then the bathroom, Harrison's bedroom and then they stopped outside my room. The door handle jiggled as they tried to open it "over here!" I heard a man say before a loud thump on the door where he was obviously trying to bust the door open.

I stood to the side of the door gun aimed ready to fire when they made it through, because lets face it they would get through eventually!! I clicked off the safety and took some deep breaths trying to calm myself down. Suddenly the door gave way and the first figure stumbled into the dark room looking around, i aimed my gun at his leg and fired.... he yelled and fell to the floor as the bullet hit him in the thigh. The second figure dived at me pushing my arms up so my shot missed him. He knocked the gun from my hands and punched me hard in the face sending me to the floor.

"You okay?" He asked turning to his friend who was laying on the floor holding his leg.

"No!"

While he was distracted i turned to try and crawl to the where my gun had landed only for him to grab my ankle and pull me away. He reached down trying to grab me by the hair but i twisted round and kicked him away. He stumbled back crashing into the dresser looking surprised that i was fighting back. I rolled to my feet again as he tried to rush me, i dodged him easily suddenly remembering my days training with Nat and Steve. I got a few good hits in before he got a hold of me and threw me into my vanity table where i crashed into the mirror landing in the broken shards of the mirror. The man walked over looking proud of himself and he looked down at me.

"You put up a good fight i give you that" he laughed wiping blood from his split lip "I'm gonna enjoy this"

"Please stop..... why are you doing this?" I asked, Grace started crying in the bathroom and i could hear Harrison shh'n her.

"Well well well, what do we have here huh?" He grinned and started to walk towards the bathroom.

"No!!!!" I screamed and launched myself off the floor diving onto the man "you leave them alone!!" i tried to fight but i could feel the shards of broken mirror digging in various parts of my body. He tossed me aside again giving me a hard punch to the gut winding me and sending me to my knees.

"Get away from them!!" i yelled as he carried on towards the bathroom.

Another figure suddenly charged into the room crashing into the man and sending him flying into the wall so hard he was out cold on impact! I breathed a sigh of relief realising Steve had arrived.

"Y/N!" He fell to his knee's beside me "are you okay?"

"There's another guy, i shot him in the leg...."

"Looks like he bled out sweetheart"

"Check on the kids" i said pointing at the bathroom hearing Grace screaming "i dont want Harrison seeing me like this...."

"Okay" he nodded and walked over to the bathroom opening the door.

"Hey pal" i heard Steve say to Harrison "you doing okay in here?"

"Where's mama...."

"Im okay baby, just stay in there with your dad for me for a minute okay?"

"Hi sweet girl, your okay.... sshhh" i could hear Steve as he cradled Grace.

"Police department!" I suddenly heard someone yell from downstairs......great timing!!

"I still think you should have gone to the hospital Y/N or at least to the compound. See Dr Cho" Steve said as he pulled another piece of broken mirror from my back. The police had taken the body of the man i shot and arrested the surviving intruder, i had refused to go to the hospital though.... id had worse than this before.

"Im okay, its not serious. Looks worse than it is" i said holding a towel full of ice to my face.

"Some of these are pretty deep, their gonna need stitches...."

"Then stitch them up!" I snapped at him "god Steve, its not like it would be the first time!"

"Your right it wouldn't, but we were in the field with no option but for me to stitch you up! Now we can get you proper medical care!"

I dropped my face into my hands as i began to cry, i couldn't hold it in any more. The adrenaline was wearing off and now the shock was setting in.

"I just want Bucky" i sobbed, i felt Steve tense up at the mention of Bucky's name before he carefully wrapped his arms around me.

"I know sweetheart, i've tried calling him and the rest of the team. I left a message"

"Where are the kids?"

"In Harrisons room, Grace is sleeping and Harrison was watching cartoons"

"I dont know what i would have done if they had been hurt!.... if you hadnt of showed up when you did Steve...."

"Dont think about that, i did show up and they are fine!" He said with a smile wiping my tears away with his thumbs.

"Thank you Steve, i mean it"

"You dont need to thank me sweetheart"

"Y/N!!!" I heard Bucky's frantic voice yell before his thundering footsteps on the stairs.

"Bucky" i sighed in relief. Within seconds he was in the room and pulling me into his arms, Wanda and Sam appearing seconds behind him.

"Ow Buck careful" i said wincing as his arm pressed into one of the shards still in my back.

"Doll why aren't you at the hospital!?"

"She refused to let me take her, you know how stubborn she can be" Steve rolled his eyes.

"Id be fine if you'd stop bitching and just stitch me up!"

"Okay come on, let me take a look. Wanda, can you check on the kids please?"

"Their fine Buck i made sure...." Steve started to say but she turned and went anyway.

"You wanna fill me in on what happened here?" Sam said to Steve looking pissed.

"Sure".

Once in the bathroom Bucky carefully removed my tank top to get a better look at my wounds.

"Baby some of these are really bad...."

Bucky said as his fingers gently traced over my back.

"Just do it Buck, I'm not going to the hospital! I can take it"

"Okay" he sighed pressing a kiss to my bare shoulder. Bucky spent the next 15 minutes or so pulling shards of mirror from my back and some in my left arm. He stitched one pretty deep wound, the rest he just cleaned and covered with bandages. Once he was done he wrapped me in his arms holding me close.

"I was so scared Buck" i mumbled against his chest "i just wanted you. I knew if you were here we'd be fine"

"I know doll, me too. When i got that message from Steve...." he shook his head "i could have lost you today, you and the kids.... i could have lost my family"

"You didn't though, we're fine"

"Your not fine! look at what that son of a bitch did to you!"

"It could have been a lot worse, i got lucky. I never thought id be so happy to see Steve again..... the guy was going for the kids Bucky and i couldn't stop him.....Steve just came out of nowhere"

"Im sure you did everything you could baby"

"I tried, but the truth is I'm out of practice. I haven't been in a fight or even picked up a gun since i found out i was pregnant with Harrison"

"You did good!" Bucky smiled leaning down and gently kissing me, i hissed slightly feeling the sting of the split lip from the punch id received and he quickly apologised.

"Guess this puts a stop to our weekend at the cabin huh? I cant even kiss you!" I moaned.

"We'll go as soon as you feel better i promise, we've waited this long right?"

"I guess so, i was just really looking forward to it"

"Oh me too! But i can wait".

Saving Grace tags: @jennmurawski13 @kenzieam

@captainchrisstan @s-t-r-i-k-e-us @lets--be-honest

@ms-betsy-fangirl @damnaged-princess

@farfromtommy @disneylovingal @lbuck121

@billweasleey @rynabarnesrogers

@heathens-takeitsl0w @lacontroller1991

@supervengerslock @barnesandrogersworld

@mariswritingforfun @perpetually-tuned-out

@thummbelina @marvelousstyles @broco8

@ineffableg-irl @ilovesupersoldiers

@writeroutoftime

#bucky x reader #steve x reader #sebastian stan #chris evans #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #winter soldier #captain america #reader insert #saving grace

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xyfanficarchive · 6 years ago

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Pieced Together

Pairing: DBH Daniel x Reader

Warnings: none

Summary: Reader is an ex-Cyberlife repair technician who has been chosen to observe and help rehabilitate Daniel in the months following the successful android revolution. But first, they have to put him back together.

Word Count: 4543 (!!!!!!!!!)

Author’s Note: tHis is insane! this is bananas!!! this is fuckin bazonkers!!! 4.5k words>???>> this is a scene ive had in my brain for a bit now. thsi would be something like the prologue to a long slow burn type fic if i decide to continue it right now, but i dont think i will. ive never written anything of that magnitude before and i want to prepare for it, to make sure im ready to follow through until the end rather than dive right in immediately. I hope you guys read it and enjoy it anyways though!! BLEAS give me your opinions on this!!!

You checked your watch. 12:48 am. You stood on the sidewalk in the eerie silence of the November night; thick, fluffy snow falling around you, padding the environment and all ambient noise. You look up at the sign above the storefront, bright white illuminating the street, the snow scintillating dazzling whites and yellows in the glow of the sodium street lamps. “Cyberlife Repair Centre” it read. You take a sip of the hot coffee in your hand before walking up to the window and pressing your face to the glass, using your free hand to block the glare that would prevent you from viewing the inside.

This place was not the location you worked at before, but it was absolutely identical in every way. Cyberlife was, if anything, the absolute master of the term “cookie-cutter.” You chuckled to yourself.

The room you were looking into was only a small part of the whole building. It was wide and short. There was a reception desk stood in the exact centre against the back wall, directly in line with the door’s entrance. The room was painted in Cyberlife blue, and the walls were decked out with displays (that were currently powered down in the store’s closed state). Sleek, modern furniture sat on either side of the room, shiny, sterile white and uncomfortable. Seating for the patrons waiting for their androids to be repaired. To the left of the reception desk was a normal sized frosted glass door. That was the staff room. And to the right of the desk was a larger frosted glass door, decorated in Cyberlife’s signature hexagonal pattern. That was the repair lab, and where you needed to be.

You backed away from the window and adjusted the straps on your backpack before digging through the pocket of your puffy winter jacket for the keycard that would allow you access to the store. You slipped it out and held it in your gloved hand, just staring.

You never did think you’d ever be here again. It made you almost giddy, in a way.

But you had a job to do. There was no time to stand around reminiscing. You walked over to the door and passed the keycard over the wireless pad, hearing the beep of the lock disarming cut through the silence. You pushed the door open and stepped into the warmth of the store inside. The room whirled to life around you, lights coming on blinding to your unaccustomed eyes, the wall displays blinking on and awaiting further human instruction. You turned back and swiped the keycard over the internal lock, closing the store off to the outside world.

Smiling to yourself, you kicked your winter boots off on the rug as you unzipped your jacket. That was something you were never allowed to do, always having to put on an air of perfection and professionality for the customers. Cyberlife was clean, Cyberlife was immaculate. But, you always worked best when you were comfortable, and you weren’t a Cyberlife employee anymore. You were just using their lab you were trained to use to repair the android waiting for you inside. Your… ward now, you supposed. Although the thought felt weird.

You padded your way across the cold floor to that big square door on the right, still unlit beyond the frosted glass. Using the keycard again, you unlocked it and it slid open, and upon entering the lights automatically turned on. There was a soft electric hum coming from the computers and machinery powering up. The room was bright white and sterile looking. In one corner there was a wall of monitors and input terminals, where software repairs were effected. Against the right wall was a set of three large 3D printers, for printing simpler components like limbs, or soft external structural plates, which gave the face and body its shape. On the left wall sat another door, that led into the storeroom where more complex biocomponents that had to be manufactured externally were kept.

You shrugged off your backpack and coat, and slipped off the fingerless gloves covering your hands, setting them down onto a stainless steel table adjacent to the door. Now stripped down to only your jeans and knit sweater, you took another sip of your coffee as you walked towards the centre of the room.

There was the main focus. Another stainless steel table, equipped with sensors and other equipment, a rolling tray of tools situated nearby. Above, a rotating module fitted with assembly tools on long mechanical arms sat waiting, although you had always preferred to simply use your hands when doing your job. You padded closer, sipping your coffee with both hands and relishing the warmth on your digits.

“Fucking Christ…” you mumbled to yourself. Lying down on the table in the centre was your ward, the android you were to repair. You remembered Markus and Connor’s words telling you he was in poor shape, really, really poor shape, but you hadn’t paid it any mind. Now, actually standing in front of him, you realized that it was kind of an understatement.

The PL600 lying in front of you was surprisingly clean for his appearance. You suspected he might have been covered in thirium at some point, but his clothes and person were only now spotless because thirium degrades and becomes invisible to the naked eye. He was missing his left arm and both his legs (and you were surprised at the fact that his legs were torn off above the knee joint, when they were designed to dislocate at the knee). Gaping hole in his right shoulder, gaping hole in the left side of his face (you gently moved his mouth open and closed and cringed at the clicking sound of plastic and metal), the front of his shirt was torn open and his abdomen was scrubbed clean of artificial skin (‘What in the fuck did they do to him at the DPD?!’ you wondered.) And his eyes. Blue-grey and open, unblinking, unseeing in his state of shutdown. You took a flashlight from the rolling tray and shone it on them, and when you didn’t see any sign of damage you were relieved. With a grimace, you took your thumb and forefinger and gently closed his eyelids.

Where to even start with him? You pulled up a rolling chair and sat adjacent to the table, propping your feet up on the edge. It would be a much easier and quicker process if you could wake him and have him run his internal diagnostic program, but there was no guarantee he would even start up in his state of disrepair. Besides, you weren’t sure you wanted to wake him up to be conscious in his dilapidated body anyways.

With a resigned sigh, you spoke up. “Computer, run scan and diagnostic on PL600 model, create list of all damaged components.” The technology allowing for the contactless scan and diagnosis of androids was new, and slow. It was effective, but took time for the computer to take the images it was sensing and separate each component from the rest in a powered-down state. Running your fingers through your hair, you got up and walked over to your backpack where you retrieved the tablet you had stored within. Taking another sip of coffee, you returned to your seat with your legs propped up, and unlocked the computer. You brought up the DPD file on this android. Might as well refresh your memory.

Model PL600. Serial number 369 911 047. There was a description of his nature and his actions on that August night, but you weren’t particularly interested in whatever police officer’s interpretation of the events that were on file. Instead, you elected to view once more the raw footage, visual and audio data taken directly from Connor’s memory banks as a record of what happened. It was intense, as always. You were rather infamous for your notable empathy towards androids, and the plight deviants faced, but you managed to have conflicted feelings towards this one. On one hand, you understood him. The flight of emotions. Anger, sadness, fear, betrayal, all racing through his mind for the first time, clouding his perceptions. Emotions giving him violent impulses that he didn’t yet have the capacity to confront and control like everyone else could. On the other hand, the girl. She was so young. She couldn’t possibly have understood this whiplash change, the android who she trusted to take care of her, with whom she was so close now standing with her on the edge of a building threatening to end her life. With her every cry and plea for her life he seemed so awfully pained, so why? You were caught between the thought that he understood he was hurting her and it was wrong, and the knowledge that he couldn’t really control it, between the belief that what he did was morally incorrect, and the belief that he deserved a second chance.

You looked up to watch him resting on the table. Now, you were legally required to take care of him. One of the first talks Markus and the rest of the android revolutionaries had with the government was on the subject of android criminals. What was to be done with them? Deviation, at the start, before it was possible to wake androids up with a single touch, was an extremely traumatic experience generally brought about by horrible instances of abuse, or strong negative emotions. It wasn’t particularly uncommon for those androids to have charges of assault, theft, or even murder on their records. But it came from a place of necessity, a drive for self-preservation; just scared people acting in fear, in self defense. They ruled that any crimes committed by an android prior to November 11, 2038 would be pardoned, but since deviancy had spread so quickly by touch across the country and most if not all androids were now deviant by non-violent means, it stood to reason that they now should be treated equally in the eyes of the law.

The government’s ideal plan would have involved every android with a crime on their hands being tracked down and put into a system where their behaviour was monitored for a certain period of time. Markus and the rest of Jericho argued that not only would it be a logistical nightmare and a huge waste of resources to track down mostly peaceful people who just want to live free, but it would likely be generally frowned upon given the public’s support of androids and the United State’s unfortunate history of marginalizing people. The government settled on a compromise: all androids currently locked up in evidence stores across the country would be submitted into this system. They were, after all the ones who were unstable enough to let themselves get caught, or something to that effect. The only caveat was that the androids would get to choose who took them in and observed them, helped them reintegrate into society.

That’s where you came in, you were approached by Markus and Connor, and asked to be the one who took in this PL600. You weren’t sure at first. Sure, you were good when it came to dealing with passing deviants, a few nights stay while you pieced them back together in your living room with your limited resources, but to have one live with you? For a matter of months? One who was particularly volatile, particularly angry and difficult?

You’d had a week to think on it. You were given his file to look over. Yes, you were indeed conflicted on how to feel about him, but the more you thought the more you came around to the idea. Markus and Connor trusted that you were capable enough anyways, right? You were up for a challenge.

“Diagnosis complete. Listing all damaged biocomponents,” chimed the computer from a speaker in the ceiling. You were startled a little from your thoughts, and looked behind you at the wall of screens in the corner, where a window had now popped up and was creating a list of all damaged components. You sucked air through your teeth as you watched it keep going on and on, and you pushed off the table with your feet to propel yourself on the office chair towards the screens.

Your expression soured as you read. Nearly every biocomponent contained in his abdomen was non-functional and needed direct replacing, not just repair. There were a few damaged bones in his shoulder area (all his limbs needed replacing it seemed, even the one that looked mostly intact). He was going to need a new jaw structure, and new soft structure components on his hip, and face (‘Fuck,’ you thought, ‘face plates are a bitch to replace…’). All in all, it was looking to be a long night. You looked at the clock. 1:32 am. You sighed.

“Computer, cross reference list of damaged components with current inventory, and create a list. Begin 3D printing any biocomponents not in stock that can be printed,” you said, and after a second or two the 3D printers on the other side of the room whirred to life, and next to the existing list another window popped up detailing which components were available and their index numbers in the storeroom.

“Well, lets get going,” you mumbled to yourself and, setting your now empty coffee cup on the floor, you stood up from your seat and walked over to the storeroom door. Inside, the room was well lit, neat, and clearly labelled. Sleek, white boxes bearing the Cyberlife logo and the codes of the respective parts they contained lined the walls. A far cry from your makeshift shelving of scavenged biocomponents and scrap limbs, parts that were damaged but likely to be less damaged than whatever new deviant of the week who passed through your life was using.

You took a cart and walked through the room, picking boxes as you went. It was like your instinct came back to you in that moment, running through the catalogue of parts he needed in your brain and matching them with their respective locations, legs simply carrying you without conscious thought. Like some kind of latent memory awakened within you. It had been so long, but you fell right back into the old motions.

You took a new lung component. New thirium pump, and thirium filter. There were compatible arms and right legs, but no left legs in sight (‘What sort of left leg epidemic has been going on?!’ you wondered.) There was a replacement soft structural component #6746g in stock (the one that would cover his shoulder), and #4503y (the one that would cover his hip), but no mandible, or component #3365u (the one that would cover the left side of his face). You picked up a roll of new thirium tubing, as you figured you would need to redo the whole setup inside his abdomen too, and left the room.

As expected, you looked over to see all the components you were missing beginning to materialize on the platform of the 3D printers across the room. You wheeled the cart over to the table in the centre. Where to start? You supposed you would have to undress him. That was a thought that made you a little uncomfortable, you realized. You wouldn’t have even blinked an eye the last time you were in a lab like this, back when you repaired automata, machines obeying orders. But now you were repairing a person, fit with a sense of modesty, and you were to strip his unconscious broken body naked without even having spoken a single word to him. To make matters worse, you knew his model was, well, equipped, being programmed to function as a sexual partner if needed, and you were not equipped to deal with the weight of that –

You shook away the thought. Back when you worked for Cyberlife you’d fancied yourself some kind of doctor, spare the fact that you healed biocomponents and code rather than flesh and bone. And this was barely different from a team of nurses stripping a patient in preparation for major surgery, no? In any case, it had to be done, so you situated yourself in a position where you could hook your arms underneath his (or, what was left of them anyways) and with a whole lot more strength than you expected to use, you hefted him into a sitting position. With his dead weight still leaning on you, the corners of your eyebrows drew upwards in an expression of discomfort as you slipped your hands up the back of the Cyberlife default PL600 uniform shirt and pulled it over his head. You laid him back down a little less gently than you would have liked.

You marvelled at the unpredictable oddness of the human psyche when you removed the remaining scraps of his pants with comparative ease, and a whole lot less internal awkwardness. You had to turn around and contemplate that for a second, shaking your head and laughing to yourself in embarrassment, wondering if you were some kind of freak for that, before you once again physically shook the thought from your mind and turned back around so you could get down to business.

But you took a second to admire him first. You never could help yourself with that. You were always amazed at Cyberlife’s ability to take inorganic material and mould it into something that looked so… realistically human. Bar the fact that you could see the places where his body was ripped open to expose plastic and metal parts, the patches where he was missing artificial skin, and the fact that he wasn’t breathing, you might have looked on him and expected him to be warm to the touch, and you tasked with stitching together flesh and not putting together individually manufactured units to create a whole body. Cyberlife was rife with issues, but you had always, always regarded their creations with the same sort of reverence one would a piece of art. And it was moments like these where you were beyond proud of yourself that you knew just how to piece this fractured, mangled form together into a functional whole again.

Which is what you jumped right into doing. This was your specialty. You were one of the best of the best. Ever since you were fired from Cyberlife, you had continued to use your expertise as a repair engineer to help passing deviants, but here? In the lab? This was where you were really in your element. It took creativity to do your job outside the lab but within, you didn’t have to worry about outdated technology failing you, or working with faulty makeshift tools. All you had to focus on was the android in front of you. Being in the repair lab again was electrifying, and you entered a deeper, more exciting state of flow with every metal bone you fixed, every new biocomponent you clicked into its rightful place, every thirium tube and electrical wire you reconnected.

When the PL600 in front of you was as close to fresh off the assembly line as you could get him, it was nearly 8 in the morning, and you felt the exhaustion in your bones. In the fog of your fatigue you had managed to find a sheet (well, more of a plastic tarp used to make thirium spills easier to clean up) to cover him, and you sat in silence just trying to ward off the onset of sleep while you admired your work. After a few minutes you got to your feet and walked over to your jacket to retrieve your phone from your pocket. Only one last thing to do now. You scrolled through your contacts and when you found the name you were looking for, you tapped the call button. You pre-emptively pressed the speaker phone button and began to lazily pace the room.

After a few rings, a voice rang through: “Hello, Y/N.”

“Hello Markus. You told me to call when the – the –’’ your brain was failing you, and your voice was hoarse “ – the fuckin’… boy was repaired.”

“I – yes I did. Did you really already go in? Have you even slept?” Markus’ voice was tinged with concern.

“I left pretty much right away when you told me where he was last night. I got here at – ’’ you pushed a forceful breath through your lips as you wiped your hand down your face “ – fuck, I don’t know, nearly one in the morning? I’ve been working on ‘em ever since.”

“Oh. Well, alright. Don’t wake him up yet. It’s best that you wait until someone else is there, too. Just wait for me, I’ll head out soon,” he said.

“Wait, you’re coming? Alright, uhh – fuck, bring him some clothes, please.”

“Alright Y/N. Try not to pass out,” he sounded teasing on the end of the line, and with a click it went dead.

Well, some coffee couldn’t hurt. You ran your fingers through your hair and raised your arms above your head in a stretch that felt euphoric given your stiff focus for the past seven and a half hours. You walked out the door and into the reception area, blinking in the morning light shining in through the wide glass windows. You made your way over to the staff door and took the keycard out of the back pocket of your jeans, swiping it over the lock. The door slid open and you stepped into the room, yet another set of lights blinking on to reveal the modest staff room. There was a row of lockers on one end, a lunch table in the middle, a beat up looking couch on one wall (in stark contrast to the gleaming, polished seats just on the other side of the door) and –

God, yes. The mini-kitchen. Your focus was immediately on the coffee machine, but you eyed a loaf of bread sitting out on the counter that brought attention to the roiling emptiness in your stomach. A sandwich didn’t sound too bad. You made your way over to the kitchen and immediately opened the cupboard above, selecting a mug that said “#1 Uncle” in multicolored letters and setting it in the coffee machine. You checked whether there was water in it (there was, thank god), and selected a pod from a bin beside the machine, loading it up and pressing the button to brew it. You left it to work and made your way over to the bread, picking it up and inspecting it, and when you were satisfied it wasn’t moldy, you took two slices and laid them flat on the counter before walking over to the fridge and searching it for sandwich ingredients. You took the coffee creamer and sat it next to the coffee machine, before retrieving some sandwich ingredients – sandwich meat, sliced cheese, a tomato, a big head of leafy lettuce in a plastic container labelled “UFD”, some mustard and mayonnaise. And when you had assembled your sandwich and prepared your coffee, you exited the room to find Markus standing outside the door, holding a bag and looking exasperated.

Quickly swallowing a mouthful of sandwich, you rushed to the door as fast as you could without your coffee sloshing onto the floor and let him in.

“I’ve been trying to get in for ten minutes,” he says as you step aside and let him walk past you.

“Eeeeehhh… sorry,” you say, and flash him a smile that goes away fast when you see him look you up and down, eyebrows knitted together in concern. It was then that you looked down to see that you were absolutely covered in blue blood – both fresh and the dark, sludgy, crusty stuff that had been sitting in the PL600’s system for all those months. You looked like a goddamn android murderer with your sleeves rolled up, arms slick with azure fluid, splatters of cerulean all up your front. Not even your socks were spared. You look back up at Markus to meet his eyes.

“Uhh… I was all alone. Shit gets messy in there sometimes. Anyways, lets just get to business here,” you said. You gestured towards the lab door, and started following Markus, eating your sandwich and sipping your coffee all the way.

When you both entered the room, Markus set the bags down on the table next to the door, mentioning that those were the clothes you requested, and walked closer to observe the still form on the table.

“Wow,” he said, a breathless quality to his voice. “You… really are something, Y/N.”

“Oh, yeah?” you said, a little disbelieving tone in your voice. You were well aware you were one of the most proficient repair engineers Cyberlife had seen, but it did you no good to admit it.

“You don’t understand, we weren’t entirely sure it would even be worth trying to repair him in the state he was in, but Connor kept insisting. Kept saying that if anyone could do it, it was you. You continue to amaze me with your skills.”

“I amaze myself sometimes,” you said in a hushed tone. “This guy was in quite possibly the worst state I’ve ever seen an android in. Honestly, ‘really bad shape’ my ass, Markus.”

“Is he ready to wake up?” Markus asked.

“At any time,” you nodded at him, and he gestured towards the android on the table, telling you to do what you had to. You walked over and set your coffee and sandwich down on the rolling tray, activating an angled panel at the head of the stainless steel table he was laying on. You activated a command that would instruct the android to initiate his start up sequence and stepped back to observe beside Markus.

You waited for those few seconds with bated breath. This was the moment you would finally see your work in action, finally meet this android you were supposed to live with for the next eight months, whose insides you had become very intimately acquainted with and yet had never spoken a word to. His LED came on, first shining steady blue, and then spinning yellow as he entered the next phase of the start up sequence. All is going normally so far.

And then his eyes snapped open, he woke with a start and a gasp, LED flashing an angry red as he looked up at the intimidating rotating module on the ceiling, face contorting in fear. He looked to either side, quickly gauging his environment before bolting upright on the table and locking eyes with you and Markus. His expression twisted into one of anger and fear, and he looked about ready to bolt before you raised your hands.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait! You’re… completely naked under that sheet,” you blurted out, and when he looked down to confirm you were indeed correct, he seemed to revaluate his impulse to run.

It was then that Markus began to slowly step towards him, hands raised. He spoke to the android on the table in that voice of his, perpetually smooth and calm, always somehow soothing:

“Hello, Daniel.”

#dbh x reader #detroit become human x reader #dbh daniel x reader #dbh daniel #dbh #x.writing

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time-2-vent · 4 years ago

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So. This is a master post about my grandma. Some of this has already been talked about here but I posted this on my private fb and wanted to keep it here too.

Okay.. so. This is gonna be a long and detailed one.

Ive never had a space where I could vent about my grandma to more than just people close to me without being blamed or her finding out. The only family I have on here is my mom and im hiding this post from her for various reasons. I understand if many of you can't read all the way through this because its gonna be a lot. I just want the people around me to have a better grasp on exactly why im so depressed.

Before I start im gonna add a trigger list because there is a LOT and im probably going to be very emotional typing this. A lot of it ive never spoken about publicly.

So for a list of TW:

Emotional, physical, sexual, and animal abuse, r*pe, p*dophelia, racism, su*cide, hospitals, ableism, be******ty mention, fatshaming, weight mention, f slur.

Okay. Im going to start at when I moved in with her. She tricked my mother into signing over custody of me when I was 10. When I was 9 years old I was forced into a mental hospital after being heavily overdosed on medications meant for adults to the point I was "sitting upside down in my chairs unresponsive and talking about tranquilizers" which i have no memory of. The hospital was probably the worst experience in my entire life and I was almost murdered by one of the older kids. After getting out of there I moved in with my grandma.

Throughout my life shes said and done so many horrible things to me. She would always yell and scream about the smallest mistakes. She used to pick me up by my hair. She was just fucking horrible to me.

Around the age of 10-11 when I started going through puberty she would always make fun of the way my genitals looked. She would ask me to stretch my labia out and move it around. Specifically she would ask me to "show me your bat wings". It was fucking disgusting but as a child I thought it was just haha funny joke.

For a while I thought I just imagined that until my mom brought it up to me and how she CAUGHT HER saying that to me multiple times. So I had confirmation that I wasn't just imagining it. I once confronted her about it and she immediately started crying (ive only seen her cry 3 times in my entire life) and told me if I ever said that again she would tell everyone in my family that I was a "prostitute" and would make everyone in my family hate me, and that it was my mother who did that to me.

My mom lived with me and my grandma for a few years but eventually moved out on her own because she couldn't handle my grandmas abuse.

My grandma dated my moms r*pist, which was my moms uncle, and told my mom she never got r*ped, and said my mom only fucked him for "attention and cigarettes". My mom was 12 at the time.

My grandma told me at 15 that the "only reason you think you're trans is because you got diddled as a kid"

My grandma called me a whore when I started becoming sexually active despite her having her first child at 16.

She once told me I was "just like my father" who is a sex offender and abused me as a child. I was also forced to give my at-the-time step brothers head when I was 3-5 and was taught that it was okay.

My grandma has called me every possible name in the book. Anytime she does something wrong its automatically my fault. She told me she would believe that im trans when I showed her my dick (at 16).

Shes incredibly rude and racist, says she hates how she can't understand Asian people. She's said the n word. She's made so many "jokes" about how "aggressive" Black people are. When my cousin found out he had Black in him she said, and I quote, "I always knew he had a n***r ass" which fucking disgusted me. Shes scoffed at my mother for limping. She scoffs at anyone disabled. Always says "you wouldn't catch me looking like that in public." She would tell my mom she was faking her pain. And coincidentally of all 4 of her kids, one was born with physical deformities. she says thats not the reason why, but she gave her up for adoption. She yells at anyone standing in her way who isn't aware. She is incredibly rude when she speaks to people to the point its embarrassing.

When I hung myself earlier this year and a friend came to pick me up she was yelling at me like "Oh so you went and tattled on me didnt you? Did you say oh boo hoo shes so abusiveeee!!" As I had literally just laid passed out in the snow from hanging myself.

When she found out I hung myself she bitched about how I had her snow boots and how she would have had to climb up the hill to find my fucking body as if it were a chore. She asked me if I wanted to be cremated out of nowhere and when I said no she replied "good I didn't want to have to pick your piercings out of your dead body" when I told her she made me want to kill myself she laughed at me and said "well then you'll never survive" my first suicide attempt was at 12 years old. A few weeks ago I started carving at my throat in front of her because im so desperate for her to LISTEN to me for 5 FUCKING SECONDS. I have legitimately cried on my knees and begged her to treat me like a person time and time again. She laughs at me and turns it around to my issues. She guilt trips me and makes me think everything is my fault. She calls me disgusting for having 1 or 2 shirts on the floor. She told me to MY FACE she will never see me as trans. Misgenders me, misgenders my friends. I jokingly told her one of my cis friends was trans, and when she left she asked me "does he really have a penis?" ABOUT A WHOLE ASS CIS WOMAN. She told me she ran over and killed a dog with a broken leg to "put it out of its misery" she would always use glue traps and I told her not to tell me about it so she waits until were in public and says "yknow whenever I catch a live mouse on one of the traps I throw it into a plastic bag and then go do the litter box to suffocate it". Shes threatened to make me pay the hospital bill when I called 911 because she was unconscious. She says horrible things to me EVERY FUCKIJG DAY. She's always making everying my fault all the time and sits and smiles while I'm sobbing and pouring my heart out because im tired of the abuse. Im so fucking tired. It goes on and on and on every day of my life. I literally slit my throat in front of her and she only stopped being mean for about a week. Im so depressed and mentally ill and this is beating on me every moment of my fucking life.

In not done but im shaking and need to stop typing for now

Edit: some other notable things, when my grandpa disowned me and stopped speaking to me for over a year she told me it was probably because of how disgusting I was. And "nobody wants to be around that".

She will ask me specific random questions about specific friends and if I dont know the answer or I forgot, she goes on a tangent about how terrible of a friend I am.

When I was cutting her hair she kept telling me I was doing it wrong, so I did it her way and she hated it and told me she's glad I didn't pursue hair because im terrible at it.

When my cat was dying she originally refused to take him to the vet because he was "just gonna die anyways so I might as well let him", then gave up her cat to the vet because she was peeing but didn't wanna take responsibility for that so she lied to them and said she showed up at her door and didn't tell them her age or even her name and that was so fucking cruel.

When she starts laughing at me sometimes she'll talk to me in a whiny "baby voice" and be like awwww, waaa im so abusedddd *mocks me crying*.

And she always talks in a tone that sounds pissed off and seems confused when I feel like I'm being scolded.

She gets in my face and puts her finger in my face and backs me into corners sometimes and then when I smack her hand out of my face she says she'll put me in jail for abuse.

Oh yea and simetimes when she gets mad at me she'll be like "ok GIRL" in the middle of me talking. Like its annoying and uncalled for.

I cant believe I forgot this holy shit. Years ago (was a minor here as well) I was attacked by my neighbors dog and it knocked me down and when I got home my grandma was accusing me of be******ty and said she was "watching it fuck me" and I was so fucking disgusted and hurt.. I try to block that from my memory because it was my third dog attack and I was traumatized.

She also regularly calls her brother a F@ggot. He is the only lgbt family member (he's gay) that i have.

She regularly fatshames people while only a few feet from them. And will whisper to me about how disgusting they look.

She asks for all of my friends deadnames and gets mad when I dont answer.

"I can't be abusive because I give you a home. I could have let social services take you."

"I cant be racist because my ex husband is Black"

"You must be living in a fantasy world where you make up shit that ive done."

"Id be depressed if I stayed in bed all day too."

"I need to learn to have lower expectations for you."

"I'm starting to resent you. So ill be taking 200$ a month for rent." (She has stopped this thankfully)(edit #2, she started taking it again im gonna be here forever lmao)

When I was underweight she would say things like "you look like an aids patient." And "Are you trying to look like your mother?"

"You're a hoarder"

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progressivleythin · 7 years ago

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whos to blame

whos to blame for the reasons you drink

whos to blame for the reasons youve screamed about how you hate her

it was me i was once again the reason.

i dont want to keep going, i want to end it so bad but ive people i wanna see

you tell me im being dilusioinal but i remember seeing you threaten to leave this house if i keep doing that

i was simply laying down by my dad at the time. simply laying down smiling,,happy

shes a child mom my sister yelled i watched from the top of the stairs wondering what was happening. i was four or five

at 13 i witnessed or heard persay my dad finally beat you in front of me. you threw his phone you were both drunk so i was scared to call 911 as id have to live with his mom.

at 14 i realized my dad was a piece of shit but you mom, you stayed golden to me because you were on my side most

still. at 14 my dad punched me for the first time while screaming about how disrespectful id been to him i was simply walking away from him to keep from bursting into tears. he came two days later apologizing saying he cried at work about hitting me.

nearing the end of age 14 you had a fight with him. he was gonna leave and i didnt mind ive been wanting him to since i was around nine maybe?

he kept slamming doors and id chosen to mock him out of anger. bad choice as itd lead to your constant wish for death sofia. “you know what!? shut the fuck up sofia, its your fault its all because of you that me and your mom are always fucked up. if you werent here wed be fine but you and your fucking ungrateful ass keep getting in the way. im fighting it right now but you dont know how much i wish i could beat your ass right now for what YOU did to us”

thats when it clicked..youve never cared about me all along. and my fear of my dad peaked that day and my suicidal thoughts took control i relapsed that day after nearly two years clean! are you proud? you were both drunk and he admitted to his thoughts of abuse to me while you hid away in your bathroom “cleaning” to which i found out meant doing cocaine and smoking weed. i sat completely straight faced listening to him say that and worse trying to shw i wasnt weak but that one tear left my eye and i knew it was over im never gonna be stronger than the fucking hate from my “parents”. that night i tried suffocating myself before bed because i thought itd be better if i was gone.

at fourteen years old you led me to my first suicide attempt,or second if you consider the time i took four ibuprofen pills “because of my headache”.

im fifteen now and nearly cried tonight on the way home because you screamed fuck you to dad and i was scared hed hit you or me in front of the baby. or maybe hed decide to turn into oncoming traffic and end us all. that fears only been growing since and its only been four hours maybe? i nearly cried in front of you both because the baby knew what happened and wanted to cry too.

thank you parents! for showing your child how happy you are to have them in your life.

to anyone currently reading this ive only listed some of the worst. im not abused im not treated as a slave im simply treated as a human im happy when im not around them but im ok i have my older siblings to save me if times get rough.

to my mom if you ever find this i wanna say fuck you but i fucking care about you too much to mean it. i constantly think youre there for me but its because ive tried to forget the moments youve said bad about me.

and my dad i have nothing i want to say to you. no thank yous none at all not even a fuck you because itd mean i care enough to waste my breath. you try but i wont let you back in no matter what.

to my brother.. the only one whos helped me most i truly love you more than my own life! id take anybullet for you okay? youve been more of a parent to me than mom and dad and i thank you more than anything for that i love you so much so so so much franco too. i havent ended my life because of you and im truly grateful for you youre my angel and i cant live without you were both pretty broken after all. i hope you find yourself soon and i find my happy soon. i really really do love you okay? you shaped me into most of the person i am now and i cant imagine not having you. id probably be dead because you know how to make me feel happy. im crying most while writing to you because its true i cant be unhappy with you. thank you so much brother so much youre an angel with your own problems and you still take time to listen to me angrily rant about mom and dad.

to franco. youre three ive known you for a while and im glad i can. im also staying alive for you i want you to remember me as a great older sister rather than an aunt. youre like my little angel too..one that bothers me enough to get out of my room or enough to laugh genuinely inlove you and your dad so so so so so much youre both the light of my life im so truly grateful for youre presence in my life

to my sister. were not as close as sisters should be. im closer with my brother but i have amazing memories with you i hope we have more dude. ive had some deep convos with you maybe not like my brother and me but enough to know how your relationship is and im glad you trust me with that info. i love you so so so so so much too i hope you have an amazing future. i hope we get closer soon otherwise idk who ill come out to first

to my closest cousins. im sorry most of you didnt find this out sooner im sorry for being so awkward with every interaction we have for constantly fucking things up. i feel like an annoyance constantly so thank you for putting up with my shit.

my internet friends ive never met any of you but thanks to you guys too even the most recent ones :) some of you really listen and helped me through some dark shit.

to anna, the first person id ever r e a l l y dated. weve never met and we dated and yeah it didnt seem like it but it feels nice saying i have dated someone even if it was barely anything physical. you truly have heard my nearly darkest thoughts ive kept most because i dont wanna be a burden. you fit with the lil gaurdisn angel group too, youve helped me alot and were both pretty fucking fucked up people. idk what my life would be with out you. you mean alot to me maybe not as much as my brother as he has the highest “score” so far but its near that.

to keana and amaya. im fucking sorry for constantly speaking about my fucking weight to you guys especially you amaya youre so fucking young and ive already shown you eating disorders i hope you never have these thoughts. keana i feel the same i gotta get annoying to you at some point im sorry

to past me this is your “rough draft” maybe? for a suicide note. im not killing myself i just wanna get it out.

once again to my brother your tribute made me cry most dont tell me i dont care for you. you mean so much to me youre really keeping me alive by alot okay? keep it up big bro please i cant do this without you i know youre as broken as me somewhere youre doing great and youre gonna make it i hope i do too.

10.06.17

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superwholock-llama-blog · 8 years ago

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IV Drips (Castiel x reader) Pt 1

Castiel Doctor! x Patient! Reader Au

You are admitted to an inpatient ward after escaping from your abusive boyfriend and trying to commit suicide. You turn up in his office and he is quick to notice something is different to you, and carrying your Iv drip with you, you make Cas wonder. Castiel is assigned to be your psychologist, and takes a personal interest as he believes that it is his job solely to help you get discharged as soon as possible. Should I continue?

Warnings: mental illness, attempt of suicide, besides that all fluff and angst

word count:2121

Castiel had seen his fair share of interesting patients in his three year career at the Mental health inpatient clinic of Lawrence Kansas, but never had one caught his undivided attention as quickly as his new patient was helped through his office door, tugging a IV machine behind her.

He could spot that hollow look in a person’s eyes a mile away, and this girl in front of him looked like a textbook patient. Yet her form sparked some type of interest inside him.Castiel had just finished reading through your file, learning that someone had called 911 seeing you attempting to take your own life by jumping in front of a train. No one had known why, but he would soon find out why you wanted to end your life. You had nearly succeeded too, and with a broken arm from the high fall and a black bruise to the left of our face, you were now here in his office.

“Please, sit down…”

“(Y/N)” You said before he could. Voice cracking, throat dry, you sit in the comfy chair in front of the mysterious doctors desk.

You had feared this would happen if you didn’t succeed, that you would be stuck in one of these white rooms with a doctor trying to figure out all your darkest and deepest secrets to try and ‘fix’ you. Licking your dry lips, your eyes scanned over the doctor sitting comfortably behind his desk.

Crisp and clean clothes, wearing mostly white like the rest of the staff in the unit, clean and shaven and a face that seemed to hold stories. He had a small welcoming smile, his eyes piercing and it felt like they were already trying to dissect you, but that could just be you being jumpy. His eyes were something you haven’t seen before, that vibrancy of blue didn’t seem natural. Then it made you question, in this ward, what was really natural? You also couldn’t help but admit he was pretty good looking for a person stuck in here.

“(Y/N), my name is Doctor Novak, and I have been assigned to your case while you stay here in the ward” His voice was slow, soft, definitely a lot more comforting and less scrutinising then the others in here.

You make yourself nod, eyes falling away to the floor. Why did you have to be here? You didn’t need to be… you weren’t as bad as they made you out to be. How were you going to explain that this was a mistake? The quiet dripping of the machine beside you filled the room, and you fought all the urges to rip it out of your arm.

“I-I really shouldn’t be here Dr Novak, there must be some kind of mistake..” Almost every patient said that, and it didn’t falter Castiel the slightest.

Castiel breathed out through his nose. He couldn’t seem to look away from your cowering form, and he knew that it wasn’t something he naturally felt when seeing his patients for the first time. Your long hair covered parts of your face,your knees curled up to your chest as your hands simply curled around them. Tell tale signs of self harm littered your arms, but they seemed old, and patches of your arms were covered in plaster. There seemed to be multiple reasons you were here, even if you didn’t fully realise just yet, one holding in the needle pumping drugs and nutritents into your malnourished body.

“You are here for a reason (Y/N), and I am here to discover ways to deal with your struggles so you can function once again without having to be in a ward like this one” Castiel explained to you.

It felt like he was treating you like a child, but you bit your tongue for going off at him. Another small nod, you still hadn’t looked up to him as you heard the rolling of wheels as Castiel stood from his chair. A quick glance up and you saw he was now leaning against the front of his table, those beautiful blue eyes still locked on your form.

“Now, I believe that getting you comfortable in your new and unusual surroundings is one of the first of many steps to help gain control over your mind set. As I saw in your file, you have been in Emergency for the last five hours, so if we have a small tour and find your room I believe we can start on a friendlier foot” With that, the male took large strides towards the door, his pale tanned almost flying behind him as he did so.

He turned to face you at the door, a smile still visible as his hand hend the door nob. You stared for a couple of moments, contemplating what he was insinuating before forcing yourself up from the chair. Nursing your broken arm with another scared one, you followed the attractive doctor out of the office, tugging that annoying beeping machine behind you as you walked.

Wasn’t there supposed to be serious talks, doctors with monotone voices and uncaring stares, all that stuff that was supposed to cold cut and clinical? Dr Novak was surprising you already, and you couldn’t help but feel slightly comforted.

Yet, even thinking of men made you think back to…him…

You shuddered, inwardly cringing as you felt yourself stop in your tracks. You leaned against the IV machine for support so your knees didn’t fall out from under you. Of course the doctor had caught this and frowned, eyes scanning over you for any signs of physical pain before deducting it was attributed by some type of mental trauma. It was still fresh, the pain you must have been feeling and getting your mind off it would be the best way to help you right now. Castiel decided not to push it.

Physical contact was off the table too, so he gave you a questionable look, tilting his head to the side slightly like a cute puppy, and you only nodded and continued on your way behind him. You were grateful that he wasn’t pushing for any information yet, that he wasn’t forcing anything else yet as your head was still pounding from what had happened only hours ago.

You both made your ways through white bleached halls, other doctors and workers walking past. You noticed plastered up walls, some holes which made you cringe slightly once again. Focusing your eyes forward and to the tilted ground, you noticed the doctor stop and you looked up to see a rather large room with a tv and comfortable couches scattered around. Some book shelves in the corner with tables and bean bags, you could see some patients sitting around.

“Here is the main entertainment room. We sometimes hold group therapy here, or in some of the more private rooms.” Dr Novak steals a glance at you.

Your eyes were still scanning the room, taking it all in. This was real, and it hadn’t seemed to have turly sunk in that you were in hospital because you had tried to end your life. Looking back to your doctor, you only nodded before he started to lead you down another walkway.

“To your left, we have the canteen. We have a schedule with meal times, free time and therapy sessions and your own will be on the wall in your room which has been prepared for your arrival” It was a little hard to keep up with his large strides, and as you shuffled along you just continued the nodding of your head.

“The therapy rooms are down that hallway there… and we have the nurse rooms here, and down the very end of the ward are the phones where you can call family and friends with clearance from the nurses.”

You could feel yourself starting to space out on the little tour. One thing that had grabbed your attention was watching the flow of your doctor’s jacket, and the glances of his rather fine behind you got when it flared up just high enough for you to see. What type of hospital was this? Friendly tours? Friendly doctors?

Castiel would glance back every now and then to keep an eye on you, to make sure you hadn’t tried to sneak off nor find a way to try and escape the ward. That look in your eyes as you took this all in made him feel pity, sure everyone had to adjust to their new surroundings but it was different seeing you go through it. You already looked tired, so he decided getting you to your room and resting would be the best idea.

“.. lastly this is your room” Halting to a stop, you ran into the back of Castiel.

It made you gasp and jump back about 3 steps, boy your head and almost fall to the floor in a fetal position. “I-im sorry!” You quickly squeaked out, almost hysterical as you couldn’t help but wait for a punch, a slap, anything to punish you. Thoughts racing, head pounding harder than it had been moments before you felt a shiver run down your spine.

This wasn’t the first time Castiel had seen a patient act this way after suffering a trauma including abuse. It was sad someone could reduce another to a shell just for their own power and amusement, and it was just as hard to try and pick up the pieces and make that broken person whole and functional again.

Kneeling, he made sure not to touch you as to not make you slip further into your mind. His eyes fought to catch yours, and when they did you felt another shiver run down his spine, something different than it had been moments before. It wasn’t the usual state of hate, it was a understanding, comforting and something you couldn’t describe.

“Don’t be (Y/N), it was a simple mistake, nothing to be sorry about.Now why don’t we get you inside and you can take a well deserve rest to help rejuvenate yourself” His voice was soft again, something you were never given by others.

Nodding shakily, he waited until you were standing up again, your posture still slumped forward and hunched ready to protect yourself at a given moment, you noticed that your name was typed out on laminated paper and blue-tacked to the door. You could feel some relief that you had your own room, not having to share like you had to for many years. It was a place for yourself, and that was new.

Opening the door, Dr Novak stepped to the side to let you in. A pale, small cozy room with a small bed and a table with a light was what you have been graced with. A barred window above the bed, giving you a view of the hospital’s garden from the second floor of the building you were located on. As stated, on the wardrobe which was built into the wall you had a seclude of your day.

Turning, your doctor watched you still.

“You have enough time to have a rest before dinner, followed by a hour of rest again. You will see my again tomorrow afternoon for our first proper session, which will happen every 3 days. We have also prescribed some anti-depressants to help you stabilize emotionally which will be given to you after supper every night. If you have any questions feel free to ask a nurse or you can ask for my personally” Again, you didn’t know why he was being so nice to you. What had you done to deserve it?

“Thanks..” you breathed, taking a seat on your bed.

Nodding, he flashed another wide and warm smile of his before turning to leave. It caused your stomach to twirl weakly, but you passed it off on the drugs that were dripping into your body.

“My pleasure (Y/N), and dont worry, you will be out of here in no time” and with that, you were now all alone in your own room. It was quiet, not much sounds besides the feet of people outside your door. As your heard the doctor’s feet finally fade away, you fall to your side on the bed, facing the wall

Exhaling slowly, you closed your eyes and tried to calm your pounding head. Hopefully this would be a new start, a new beginning was just what you needed. You just hoped that it would work out… but you couldn’t help but think it would all go to hell once again. You then fell into a dreamless slumber with the constant sound of dripping lulling you.

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