#but what im trying to say
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.
good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.
sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.
so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.
one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.
#warm up#writeblr#actually this is because again i don't go here#i don't read/write fanfic but i have nothing but respect for my troops#but i also have never played minecraft. im sorry. please ask me any question about pokemon tho i love that shit#anyway#out of some banal and thoughtless curiosity i watched the minecraft movie trailer#and again i know nothing about minecraft. i am aware im in an endangered population#but im watching this going: this is so fucking.... BAD#there is NO LOVE in it!#like if someone who has NO history in minecraft watches that and is like - ohhh this is soulless#WHO IS THE AUDIENCE????#ppl who love minecraft are gonna hate it!!!#at some point it's the ''mean girls musical movie'' problem --#some people will always hate the premise of what you're doing and some people will love it#make it for the ppl who love it#and usually that somewhat convinces the haters to like. chill enough to TRY it . bc it IS good#but when you try to make it for the haters..... nobody likes it. it doesn't have passion. energy. footwork#which is a small way of saying a big thing: if you love something. fucking make it and assume someone will love it too.#i love u . be brave . be bold. be in boston and come to my reading#where i wrote a really weird fucked up little book.#love u love u love u etc
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oversaturate
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuji itadori#itadori yuuji#jjk yuuji#been trying some stuff out in an attempt to beat the artblock out of myself with hammers#and i LOVE how it looks but god it takes so long painting like this#i had a ref style i was going for that was a lot more washed out and watercoloury#and to be fair my take on it did start out looking more adjacent to that#u can still kinda see remnants of the initial watercolour washes in the collar of yuuji's jacket in th bottom one#but it Did Not Last fhdjfjjg what can i say im a gouache/oils gal#i can't use soft greys and watery inks i need stark blacks i need the reddest red the colour wheel will provide#one thing i did keep from the refs were the sharp prickly fine lines i think those look real cool against textured colour blocks#anyway ive also been having a lot of fun playing with rly rly harsh lighting on the hair#and even thinner linework put down after the colour as opposed to before#probably one of the reasons why it takes a lot longer but also it mimics traditional art a lot more#ill probably continue playing around with this sort of render ! or at least keep elements of it
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Vanny can’t explain everything in the FNAF pizzaplex..
#chloesimagination#myart#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#michael afton#fnaf vanny#fnaf vanessa#elizabeth afton#ms afton#william afton#evan afton#cc fnaf#security breach#fnaf fanart#NGL I’m still not over the Afton staff bots that are in security breach#IM still curious of what that whole scene is trying to say#other then being a cool nod to the Aftons#BUT LORE and theories don’t matter in this comic#what if Michael saw the Afton staff bots BAHA#YOUD think he’d be mad or just tired#Vanessa definitely can’t explain it either#I think she knows most things going on at the pizzaplex BUT not all#and I think this one would stump her a lil BAHA#just no way to wave this off just like damn sorry Michael#I STILL CANT GET OVER TOO HOW#CC is repped by the bot missing a head 💀#Michaels not gonna like that one oof
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We all know the semi-canonical ‘all the Robins know to hide/duck inside of Batman’s cape, even as adults’ thing.
We also know that Danny ‘is LITERALLY a ghost’ Fenton sucks at remembering his own intangibility while ALSO forgetting to look ahead of him.
All I’m saying is, Danny Fenton (or Phantom, if you’d really like) would absolutely SLAM into Batman on accident while running on roof tops and Bruce ‘Brooding Instinct’ Wayne doesn’t even think twice about letting the kid hide and scanning around for danger before there’s a record scratch of ‘wait who tf is this?’ kicks in.
#dp x dc#dpxdc#dc x dp#dcxdp#danny phantom crossover#listen I’m just SAYING#my initial thought is Fenton bc dark hair and how most of the robins have had dark hair#Danny isn’t even necessarily running from danger. he just got into parkour and forgot how to stop his momentum#I mean you CAN have him running from something. give this an ACTUAL plot#but honestly I just think it’d be a fun little setup#Danny peaks out and. in panic. goes#hi we’re the council of the dead. we’ve been trying to contact you and yours about your extended warranty#*extended life warranty or what have you#Danny hasn’t even gotten death vibes from anyone yet so now he has to wing it#yeah hi… uh. Batman sir. if that’s your preferred moniker?#right so we’re basically the ghost irs and you owe death taxes?#yeah you know the saying. death and taxes. guarantees of life. haha.#which in this case means you owe money bc you aren’t dead yet. probably. idk I uh. JUST got the job .#anyways ohhhh hi yep you’re. red hood. yeah so. mm. yeah we definitely need to get you to the ghostly dmv#it’s the same as a regular dmv but people have actually been bored to death in there#(meanwhile Batman is like WAIT IS THIS SMALL CHILD DEAD?!)#(SURE WHATEVER IM RICH HOW DO I FIND A GHOST ACCOUNTANT AND MORE IMPORTANTLY DO YOU RESPECT GHOST ADOPTIONS?)
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Honestly everyone give it up for repulsed aces/aros. Yall get so much shit for having boundaries and its frustrating to watch. You're all getting sent complimentary gift baskets
#aromantic#asexual#aspec#romance repulsed#sex repulsed#I was very briefly romance repulsed due to An Incident and like#every time i tried being like 'hey theres a PDA channel can you use that for this' to my friends with partners theyd throw a shit fit#anyway what im trying to say is that yall are strong as fuck and deserve to have boundaries respected.
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you know what i think is really cool about dungeon meshi? the fact that it really handles the whole 'how our food is made' so gracefully. in this day and age, we've become so disconnected from how our food is produced and distributed that the thought of how our food is obtained brings disgust to many people (and for the big industry farms, it honestly should! but im referring to our existence as omnivores in the food chain). marcille acted ridiculous whenever the thought of killing a monster for food is brought up, but honestly, she's a great model for how many people nowadays react whenever they have to truly think about what they are consuming/are brought to a meat farm.
senshi shows the characters (and us, the audience) about the process of making food in a respectful, genuine way to the creatures he has used to produce nourishing meals. by explaining the nutrition and benefits of each creature, he creates and healthy relationship between the consumers and the meal they have. the show really brings a new dimension of respect for each of our meals. truly the bob ross/marie kondo of cooking.
#dungeon meshi#senshi#marcille donato#laois touden#marie kondo would be so proud theyd get along great tbh#text post#my posts#god i hope i articulated this well im tired but i know what im trying to say#like people who eat meat but won't eat meat with bones because then they think of it as an animal: this is directed at you#it was always an animal and its honestly more disrespectful to ignore it#this is also not anti-vegetarian this is more just a general observation of our society as a whole#delicious in dungeon
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im annoyed and a little pedantic so can i just say as a blanket statement
queerbaiting is when the promotion for a FICTIONAL STORY intentionally hints towards two characters having a romantic relationship, without any intention to follow through in the show, in order to get queer people watching without discouraging the homophobic enjoyers of the show
queerbaiting is NOT:
a celebrity who you think is queer because theyre gnc or they have a 'vibe'. that is a real person and they cannot queerbait
two friends of the same gender pretending to flirt with each other for fun. those are real people and they cannot queerbait
a show with two characters of the same gender who are canonically friends that YOU PERSONALLY think would be better in a relationship. that's not bating, that's shipping, and subject to opinion
there are more but those are the main examples of people misunderstanding what queerbaiting is and being mad at something that isn't actually a problem
#the general rule if youre unsure is to ask yourself 'is that a real person i think is hinting that they are queer' and if the answer is yes#then that cannot be queerbaiting because thats a human person#apparently this is not a known fact anymore but even celebrities are human and have human emotions and human experiences#so sometimes their experiences appear to match yours and if your experience stems from your queer identity then often you can assume that#the celebrity in question is also queer#you may be right but you're probably wrong because you do not know that celebrity and have no way of knowing if they do not explicitly say#also its none of your business#anyway im annoyed at how many people dont know what queerbaiting is anymore#no jimmy solidarity and joel smallishbeans are not queerbaiting because they are FRIENDS and they are allowed to interact with each other#however they like because they are FRIENDS and they are not even remotely trying to hint that they themselves are queer or something#queerbaiting#queer#lgbtq#wren wrambles
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Something something Autism has a genetic factor Something something People can sometimes hate what they see of themselves in others
#dungeon meshi#laios touden#YALL SEE MY VISION#I KNOW YALL UNDERSTAND WHAT IM TRYING TO SAY#dungeon meshi spoilers#dungeon meshi manga
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Hiiii thanks for 500 followerrrs!!! Idk why so many of you are here but thaanks 💖
(Seriously tho thank you its pretty cool) anyways I drew more murderous robots lol
#murder drones#murder drones uzi#murder drones n#murder drones v#uzi doorman#serial designation n#serial designation v#nuzi#biscuitbites#murder drones fanart#lowkey becoming a murder drones blog and honestly im here for it. hii guys we can be murder drones bestiessss#ive been trying to be more active with replying to people n stuff but sometimes idk what to say so im sorry if i dont replyyyy#i wanna follow more md creators too but i havent gotten around to doing that#this show has fr taken over my brainnnnnn!!!!! i huave wooooorrrrrrrmmmms dude#telling my friends irl about it so mayybe they can huave some. murder drones worms. and i can feed them md content#ok i shut up now uhm like and subscribe for more assassins creed for the nintendo ds !! thanks again for 500 i might make something idk#k byebye
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I know its kinda ooc but i needed to see it
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#satosugu#gojo satoru#geto suguru#stsg#very quick doodles inbetween things#but also what if i made an actual in character comic about this harhar can you imagine im trying to be responsible and make less fanart#but i love media what can i say i always have#nothing wrong with a little personal comic about different irl ptsd things followed by anime doodles#mistakes have been made
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purgatory hall!
#LISTEN OKAY I KNOW WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE#IM TRYING TO BE CREATIVE-#im too shy for this oh god i can already see what people are gonna say#and to that i say. drink water#obey me#my art#obey me art#obey me solomon#obey me simeon#obey me luke
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we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.
"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."
i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.
you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"
i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.
what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.
i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.
"don't make a big deal about this," you said.
this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.
"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.
you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."
the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.
afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."
#spilled ink#writeblr#i'm trying to write about this really specific and wierd new experience#that i think is specific to the internet generation#where people you trust can just... say whatever??? and while most people are trustworthy#sometimes they'll just like... put ur shit out there????#and the thing is that sometimes it's GOOD - i want you to tell ppl if ur partner is being cruel!!!!!#i want u to be like ''hey is it normal if xyz happens'' ... but stuff like ''she's afraid of the dark''#PARTICULARLY when it's CLEARLY making fun of me....#what is the point of that.#this is huge and complicated and happens outside of romantic relationships too btw#like someone u thought of as a friend will be like . oh did u know she's scared of heights and it's like.#girl why are u fuckin doing that tho?#it's not a SECRET i just ...???????????????????????#and i think that gross feeling of like -- ''i can't REALLY be upset bc there's not a TRUE RULE about this....''#it's just not something talked about. bc it's so specific and yet so complex#bc how could i say like '' this is a violation of trust'' when it... technically I GUESS isn't????????????#idk maybe im just like super sensitive but please tell me in the comments/tags/etc if this is#something u have experienced (a trusted person like spreading ur shit) and if u were cool with it
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the dialogue choices in this game should be more diabolical
#i love akechi but i sometimes i wish you could bully him like no matter which dialogue u pick it sounds like ur flirting back w him#��i'm going to be completely honest with you. i've always hated you” why can't u say smt unserious back#like “sorry i have a snatched waist and correct opinions on everything.” or like “ur loss lmao”#hate playing darts with this bitch bc i play on a steamdeck and i don't have a fucking gyroscope so like#it's trying to replicate how the joycons or pro controller would throw AND ITS SUCKS SO BAD#like i just see akechi get a hat trick every single fucking time with three bulls in a row and meanwhile im struggling to line the thing up#and then after u finish he's like “hmm i see. that's an interesting way to play it” WHAT THE FUCK THERES LITERALLY NO STRATEGY HERE SMARTAS#I JUST MISSED. IM NOT STRATEGIZING. THERES NOTHING “INTERESTING” ABOUT IT.#i hate going to penguin snipers so much i hope i can get this stupid game on switch so i can actually rank up akechi's baton pass#and not waste like 1000 yen every night bc i refuse to not let a party member be on rank 3#akechi fuck yourself why can't we play 501 like we do with everyone else. why do u have to make everything abt this stupid rivalry#im gonna kms i hate akeci and i hate darts#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#goro akechi#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
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For all my fellow ADHD and soft voice-havers when we get interrupted/can't say anything constantly
#bro having conversations is so hard#i swear my voice is literally at the perfect frequency to make it barely audible to anyone without superhuman hearing or smthn#the amount of times no one hears what im trying to say#so i cant interrupt because im not loud enough and i also cant TALK OVER people because overlapping words is#like the perfect recipe for a sensory overload/autistic shutdown
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icarus
#‘dont forget what happened to icarus’. ough. ow. aough. Owwww OWWW#thry make me sooooo sadddd#Ughhh#the text says ‘whats done is done/you know this isnt real’#i was thinking of the tweet talking about the portal incident and how ford remembered it wrong#(where he holds fidds in his arms)#and the two interpretations of it being him viewing himself as a hero and/or as him trying to lessen his guilt#so this was made with all of that in mind#idk why i felt the need to explain that im normal. Promise. normal enjoyer of details#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddauthor#gravity falls#felix art
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