#but what are you saying abt the laws in place? do u think they should be stricter? banned? more lenient?

[credulouscanidae]

why is it whenever the topic of abortion comes up irl the person im talking to immediately brings up abortions georg who gets like 10 abortions in a row like. even if theyre pro choice they still complain about "those crazy women who take advantage of the system" cuz im quite confident saying that someone like that would be so rare that it's not even worth discussion compared to the millions of others who require abortions but cant get them.

idk it just reeks of that mindset of "oh theres people that take advantage of the benefits system by pretending to be disabled" like im sorry but i would rather a thousand people "take advantage" of the system if it meant the system was still there to support the multi-millions of people that need it.

[reverieaa]

Maybe when u talk about affirmations, you should use more words like "PERSONALLY" , "FOR ME", "IMO"...Because when you imply affirmations dont work AT ALL thats almost insulting. The law is about changing your thoughts. Affirmations= thoughts. The only way they wouldnt work is if you waver. Have you ever heard about the 48hc for example? People manifested outrageous things simply by mantaining a strict mental. Is it easy? Hell no, but if you do it anyway, you WILL get results. We repeat shit all day anyway. No one has to use affs as their method of choice, but they do work, if you feel they dont for YOU, or you dont LIKE affirmations, just say that.

I think it's good to consider that anything I say related to loa in my own blog would my personal opinion.

I follow Neville's teachings, which is that affirmations on their own have no power if they are not accepted, are just words. As he put in his words, it's like a talking parrot, parrots say words they don't know. U wouldn't need to repeat words like a robot if u changed your state, bc those thoughts come from that, instead of having to fight yourself everyday only to lead into spiral, these ppl used affirming to change their state and help themselves go within.

U could affirm a million times, go on a strict mental diet where u run away from negative, doubtful thoughts until u get what u want, but is that what u want ur life to be?? Often times ppl in " strict mental affirmation diets" don't allow themselves to have human emotions such as frustration and sadness but lock them away as if they're not normal.

Anything could work bc u make it work, but if u start putting blaming causation towards affirmations on your own, u will continue to put causation into everything outside of u, making u feel powerless.

When u are affirming sth and feeling the other, u will feel delusional and forceful. Telling ppl aff work when they feel bad and should keep going is bad for their mental health. That is what I'm talking about. Saying it WILL happen, and feeling it will are very different.

But I don't feel the need to go on talk abt it if ppl didn't ask in the first place. I could tell ppl affirming is the way to go, but to tell them that that's the only way when it all truly comes from them- to not show them the power they have within is to rob them of it.

I don't need to add extra words to make you feel more comfortable with my beliefs simply bc they do not align with yours, neither do I try to make ppl feel bad for using them bc that's what works best for them. What are you offended by? Because I don't think people care that much.

If you don't like it when ppl say affirming doesn't work for them just bc it works for you, just say that

[mwebber]

I want to hear abt st augustine’s confessions lol

reading back on the draft it was less about the confessions themselves and more about the place of faith in agnostic/christian-adjacent life and also incoherent scribbles about upholding the law with a vague connection via The Discussion Of Moral Good, if u catch my groove? since at least in north america, good and bad is heavily influenced by christianity, to say less of laws/policies themselves..

like at its heart ig my overarching question is, “what is good?” and obvs the og roman catholic answer would be adhering to roman catholic traditions, so i get why people like martin luther were like. well fuck you, why do You get to decide. i remember reading nietzsche’s on the genealogy of morals back in first yr and agreeing with his more scathing view of christianity (basically that it's arbitrary rules / fake as fuck / etc), and in a way i do still agree that the dictations of these larger institutions aren’t necessarily natural—but like, whether we should entirely discount the values of faith in regards to morality because of that is a different question. or idk, maybe morality always comes back to utilitarianism and deontology in the end. like, does personal sanctity for some perceived notion of the afterlife justify being a bad christian (at least measured in the spirit of His teachings)? more generally, does the intention to be “good” justify the hurt inflicted unto others? and this debate has obviously been going on for literally ever so i won't linger on it further, but it's funny when i talk to my preacher's-son-turned-atheist friend about this topic bc we like, ALWAYS get to this same roadblock. it's the unanswerable christian question.

st augustine's emo-ness about his straying from the faith and subsequent relief in finding god again is like . well. not the most entertaining reading. but he's made relatable for his very human struggles while he asks the same kinds of questions! he just comes to a diff conclusion than i do (devoting himself to god as opposed to being more open to the nuances of faith) bc obvi he wrote in a completely different sociopolitical/sociocultural context. anyway this was very messy as is the og draft but tl;dr i think the notion of Upholding Justice as it relates to the question of Are We In The Moral Right is something i will be grappling with for the rest of my life as long as i am in this career LOL

[forffax]

chungy with 1,6,9,12, 38-40, and A, B, F, and I for you!

YAAY thank u chase!!! :]

1. What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do? chungy is surprisingly patient, even if they don't like it! she spent a long time before becoming sentient as a chest... now that he's adventuring they prefer to be On The Move whenever possible! so uh probably for a few hours before she gets too antsy sdkjhsd 6. Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable? chungy's idea of "laws" are more "rules/guidelines for not getting chased out of towns and for keeping my friends", so they're pretty flexible for her! 9. Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word? they do swear, but not super often! chungy learned a lot about society by mimicking people, so she probably first parroted a "FUCK" that he heard somewhere without really knowing what it meant sdfhjs. 12. How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach? if she stops to think about it he would probably shapeshift that area to be in reach but otherwise they'd rub up against the nearest wall or tree like a bear skdklfhs 38. What memory do they revisit the most often? chungy likes remembering the moment they first "woke up" and explored his home for the first time :] she also has a handful of moments from adventuring with their current party that he holds very dear! usually these are just quiet times of hanging out or sharing food with others :] 39. How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people?  chungy is pretty bold in how open they are about her impressions of others. if chungy thinks you've done something wrong he's going to proclaim it Loudly skjdfs. However! it's very hard to do wrong in their eyes (eye?) if you're her friend. this is less about excusing the behavior of loved ones and more about "they're my friends so clearly they're in the right and they're setting an example i should follow, chungy fresh." 40. How sensitive are they to their own flaws? BLIND TO THEIR OWN FAULTS DOT JPEG. might say "whoopsie" but i don't think chungy has ever been genuinely remorseful for anything she's ever done. A. Why are you excited about this character? chungy fresh is sooo fun to draw and play as :] and seeing how much other ppl love them too makes me sooo happy genuinely love her so dearly... B. What inspired you to create them? a lot of chungy's story came later but i think i just doodled a weird fox thing in high school and was like. what if there was a character who had like a verbal text/forum signature. and it was also their name. F. What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)? deep love in my heart. chungy my belungy. also thinking abt them makes me want to draw her more and write out more of his backstory.. I. Do you prefer to keep them in their canon universe? For the most part! although I suppose there's a bit of separation between chungy just Existing in my brain and the chungy that I play as in tabletop sessions with my friends... i like drawing her in weird outfits and such that has nothing to do with the bong universe sometimes sdjkfhsdjk

[butchviking]

Hello! Per the define transgender q I thought I'd put my 2 cents out there as a trans person. The way I'd define it for me is that the way I "see" myself to be incongruent with how I was assigned at birth. To me its more transition/dysphoria based, it has nothing to do with how I express myself via clothes or mannerisms and everything to do with how I feel about myself internally. Not to say gender expression isn't important, especially in someone's transition and wanting to be recognized as the gender they are, but if you only think of trans people wanting to transition in order to fit a stereotype of the opposite sex then that just reduces everything they do to a performance or an act. And gender expression is important whether ur trans or cis, gnc or not. 

Idk. Being trans is just part of who I am, same way that I have brown eyes. Im not "escaping" from anything nor am i confused. I think because ppl recognize/come to terms with being trans differently is also why they say being trans is different for everyone. Even if there is a clear cut definition, it's still gonna look different based on how or if someone is able to medically/socially transition and how far in their transition they are, and anti-trans laws will affect that as well. Community, activism, and support are important regardless. At the end of the day I just want to be able to feel safe in knowing that if I got in a major car accident tomorrow where I will need intensive medical care, that the medical team will treat me even though the parts I have don't match what it says I should have on my driver's license. 

Hope that makes sense I've been typing off and on at work but just wanted to put my perspective out there. Peace love and ray toro <3

huh okay, it's really interesting that u say it's more transition/dysphoria based to u bc i feel like most trans ppl ive spoken to abt it (might b a reflection of the kind of trans ppl i was hanging out w) definitely put identity before transition status/intent.

definitely with u on the gender expression part - i think its a rly common problem that someone sets out on a transition bc of dysphoria & bc they want to be viewed as & treated as the opposite gender by society but somewhere along the way they end up leaning way too heavily on stereotypes for that and they do find themselves trapped in a performance and end up ridiculously self-concious abt it all (like all the transguys who worry endlessly about if they're walking right if they're holding their drinks right if they're SLEEPING right, that one guy who found himself googling "do men eat oatmeal" -_-)

also v interested in ur statement that how ppl "recognize/come to terms with being trans" affects how they define the concept in general.. im gonna think on that but im not sure i know what u mean 🤔 i think i have to twist that one round a little fr it to make sense 2 me... id agree that people often have different motivations for transition & trans identity and that would affect how they define the term... i think that's sort of the same thing, it's just that u see being trans as smthn inherent to a person whereas i see it as a choice so we'd use different wording.

n yeah ive been thinking more abt where exactly i think legal lines n definitions need to be drawn i think im gonna make another post abt it but ur right that community, activism, & support are important regardless and i think for the most part CAN function regardless. & i understand ur concerns abt getting medical treatment - ppl always talk about 'trans healthcare' just meaning medical transition but that's mostly a whole separate thing to actual trans healthcare which is in a scary state rn (& getting scarier in some places - didn't one state recently pass a law that medical staff are legally allowed to refuse treatment if someone is lgbt?) (yeah i just checked of course its fucking florida 😑) n im sorry u have to live w that. u deserve proper care & treatment u deserve to live safe in the knowledge that u will receive that proper care & treatment.

thank u so much for weighing in!! its refreshing 2 get a different perspective here. peace & love & ray toro 😁✌️ <3

[fearlessinger]

This is super interesting but I feel like Apollo's sense of failure for the largest part isn't actually tied to his talents. Not directly at least. He's always been praised for those by more or less everybody, including his father. What Zeus does isn't putting down Apollo's accomplishments, but taking ownership of them ("You have done me proud" = your success is something u owe me. It is mine.) and limiting Apollo's ability to continue to go out and do stuff via the non interference laws... and a secret third thing that I'll talk about later.

This creates a situation where Apollo doesn't feel bad abt his skills (how could he? Nobody's better than him at what he does) but also is unable to feel truly good abt them (they are owed, he doesn't own them, and he can't really use them freely). Apollo's response, I think, still fits the theory tho: he goes well fuck you then I'm gonna stop paying rent. He gets back at his father by making a spectacle of his pretend-incompetence instead. And neither Zeus nor anybody else can weaponize the pretend incompetence against him bc it's pretend. Apollo's failing on purpose.

But the thing that Apollo really does feel a failure about, and is made to feel a failure about by his father and the entire rest of his family, is his inability to keep safe the ppl he loves. Apollo loves too much. Apollo loves wrong. He should be able to shrug off the losses, at the very least, if not prevent them in the first place. What do all his power and talents matter, if they're no use to him when it most matters?

And I think this is where the secret third thing I was talking about earlier comes into play, because when Zeus tells his son "only you could have done this, I had no choice but to foist the responsibility of doing it fully onto your shoulders," what he's really saying is that bc Apollo is so good, so talented, in case of failure it's gonna be all Apollo's fault. And I'm pretty sure the end of TON wasn't the first time Zeus did that. "Your fault. Your punishment", remember? Again I think Apollo's response to this fits the theory. He pushes people away. He isolates himself. He boasts about all those accomplishments of his that could never accomplish what he cared about more than anything in the world. He proclaims left and right that he doesn't care at all. He stops trying to do better bc if he's destined to fail anyway, he might as well fail on purpose. That would at least give him some measure of control. An escape. You see, I meant to do that, bc I don't care. I don't care. I don't care.

Does this make sense?

I got too deep into the Schema Theory while writing the paper for one of my exams and it got me thinking about Apollo's coping mechanisms yk

Basically the gist of this theory is that, in the eventuality that their primary needs are not satisfied during their formative years, a child might develop a bunch of different behavioural schemes in their adult life (which are too many to be listed here oh my god) that are a direct reflection of how the parent failed them during childhood

For example, one of these schemes is emotional deprivation, which is a person's tendency to emotionally distance themselves from other people due to the fact that they believe they won't be able to comfort them, and it's a scheme that's formed due to the guardian not satisfying the child's emotional needs. Basically it's formed through a "If my parent couldn't do it, then how could others?" sort of mentality

Another one, which I believe is very relevant here, is the sense of failure, which originates due to the guardian's immensely overbearing nature and the continuous dissatisfaction with the child's efforts. As an adult, the child in question believes that they're inept at everything, even if evidence points to the contrary, because of the fundamental belief that they hold that they're a failure

(Does it remind you of anyone?)

Now, these schemes tend to go hand in hand with modes, which are essentially coping mechanisms that the person uses to deal with whatever life throws at them and whatever negative emotion these schemes bring on. One of these modes is the *squints* scheme overcompensation? Anyway what it says on the article I got the info from is that basically people who use this coping mechanism tend to do the opposite of what their behavioural scheme tells them to do. If they're ashamed, they put down others. If they feel like a failure, they boast. (Again. Who does this sound like.)

AT FIRST it seems like a good coping mechanism but it's actually not, because the overcompensation leads to this vicious cycle where the more a person overcompensates, the more the scheme worsens. In Apollo's case, the scheme we're examining here is his sense of failure; in his overcompensation mode, to avoid feeling incompetent he tries to constantly put himself in the spotlight, drawing attention to his talents. However, he does it in such a ridiculous way (perhaps actually in some form of self-sabotage?) that the people around him insult those talents, call him a failure, and thus worsen his feeling of worthlessness.

(This might be tied to the punitive scheme as well, maybe? Considering how keen Zeus was on punishment, Apollo might've developed this scheme as a result, though over the centuries it could've shifted its focus from everyone to just him idk. The change between "I'm punishing everything and everyone for being so stupid, even my own son + this Ptolemaic god who breathed wrong in my direction" to "Actually I'm chill" seems pretty suspicious to me tbh)

ANYWAY all of this is to say that everything he does is so intrinsically tied to the damage Zeus did to him that it hurts. All his behaviours all his coping mechanisms. Everything

The arrogance is not just a façade he built over the years to hide his feeling of unhappiness and guilt!! It's quite literally an abuse response!!!!

And yeah maybe Leto was the one who spent the most time with him and Artemis and who took the most care of them so technically she should be considered his figure of attachment instead of Zeus but then again. How much time did Apollo spend beside her compared to the time he spent at Zeus' side, after the twins became Olympians? What do a few moments with her in a year do against entire centuries with him?

Leto's influence never really mattered. He was doomed since the beginning

[seekerstone]

“just do ur homework a day early” very good advice thank u. i will not take it bc unfortunately it will be missing deadline panic. instead i will fritter away the day & then stay up until 3am to do it then. thanks for understanding

[waybrights]

I wish u would write a fic where the girls in ur sats au announce to the fans that they have left Andrias. I mean that’s a lot of spoilers so u don’t gotta but I think abt this a lot XD

sats au sats aU SATS AU SATS AU!!!!!! and yes this is spoilery but its not like the big fic is going to happen so i dont mind posting this!!! nothing but fluff i promise hehehe hope u all enjoy!!!

The three of them crowd around Marcy’s laptop, bodies pressed together as they watch the screen, three pairs of eyes scanning the paragraph Anne had written. “Is it too much?” Anne asks, breaking the silence and pulling her eyes away from the screen, her worried eyes flitting between her two girlfriends.

“What? No, I think it’s great,” Sasha replies, a smile tugging at her lips, “I like the part about how we decided it would be best after ‘many medical scares’, it adds a flare PR wouldn’t bother with-”

“Sasha,” Anne groans, throwing her head back, “Will you take this seriously?”

“I am!” She turns to Marcy, prodding her shoulder, “Aren’t I being serious about this Mars?”

“Mhm,” Marcy hums, not taking her eyes off the document. With another prod, she turns to look at Sasha, dropping her forehead onto her hand. “Yes, Sasha, you’re taking this so seriously.”

A triumphant grin lit up her face at the agreement. “See!”

Anne rolls her eyes playfully and turns back to the computer, pressing her chest to Marcy’s back. “So… should we post it?”

The three of them stare at the screen again, hearts hammering in a tune none heard, but all three felt.

“Yeah,” Sasha lets out a sigh, pushing up from the table. “There’s nothing else to say, is there? We dropped him, and all our reasons are there without giving too much detail, they know we’re safe and okay. Staring at it isn’t going to miraculously make something else appear.”

Dropping her head onto Marcy’s, Anne hums. “Okay, yeah Mar-mar, you can post it.”

“You sure?” she asks, her pulse in her finger that hovers over the mouse, just a click away from posting what could be the biggest announcement of their career. If they post it, everything would be revealed and so many questions would be asked (ones they wouldn’t be able to answer, either by law or for personal reasons), they’d never been the best with intrusive questions before, she didn’t want to think about how bad it could get after this.

But they had to, they all knew that. They wouldn’t be able to ignore it forever, not when Andrias could come out with anything at any moment, spinning the story on its head to make them look like the bad guys. Besides, the fans had started to worry, even going as far as to pull a lie out of their ass’ just to get a reaction.

“Sure as we can be,” Anne replies, placing her hand on top of Marcy’s, her finger dropping ever closer to the mouse. “Come on, Sash, we have to click it together,” and marcy could just hear the grin as she spoke.

There was a huff, followed by a grumble and then a warmth on her right, Sasha’s breath in her ear as she leans over to place her hand on top of Anne’s, her thumb latching between her’s and Marcy’s, a tingling sensation running through her hand as Sasha rubs circles into the gap between her thumb and index. “This good enough for you, Annie?”

There’s the sound of lips on skin, followed quickly by a gasp and Anne’s loud cackle as she pulls away. “You’re so gross, Annie,” Sasha grumbles, the warmth leaving Marcy’s side for a second as she wipes her cheek, muttering under her breath as she went.

“I didn’t do anything-”

“You licked me!” Sasha cries, her hand dramatically falling onto Marcy’s shoulder. “What if I catch something and can’t play at our next show?”

“God, you are so dramatic,” Anne laughs, pressing ever closer to Marcy.

“I’ll get you back for that, Boonchuy… Just you wait…” Sasha hisses, though her voice holds no anger. It makes Marcy smile, the way they can fight with each other but it never amounting to anything more than a kiss on the cheek as an apology, it’s so different to what they used to be like, gone where the days of shouting matches across an empty stadium, loud slams of doors and muffled sobs carrying long into the night, Marcy didn’t have to play mediator anymore, acting like a rope the two could tug on any time they got in a fight. It was nice to just sit and let it wash over her, their voices containing nothing but playful competition.

“Sure you will, love,” she replies, returning her chin to its place in Marcy’s hair. “Now, back to the matter at hand-”

“I think my health is more important-”

“Sasha, just put your hand on mine and stop complaining,” Anne says, her voice firm but kind.

“Gee, yes ma’am,” Sasha grumbles, once again placing her hand on top of Anne’s and causing Marcy’s finger to dip dangerously close to the button that could potentially change their lives.

“Okay,” Marcy says, flicking her gaze from the screen to their hands and back again. “On three.”

“Sasha, you should count because you’re the leader.”

“What? No, I'm…” a sigh. “Alright fine, but if this goes badly it’s not my faul-”

“Sasha!”

“Sorry,” she snorts, then clears her throat and marcy knows that she is finally being serious about it. “Okay, three-”

A force presses Marcy’s finger down and a tiny click echoes through the room. The screen flashes and suddenly the ‘edit post’ screen is gone, now replaced with the band’s official Twitter page, the post up and already being liked.

“What the fuck?”

“We said on three?” Anne shouts and Marcy can’t help but bark out a laugh.

“But I always count down, remember? Three, two, one! It’s my thing!”

“But we said on three!”

“Marcy-” their voices mingle, creating one high pitched cry of her name.

Turning to face them, she can’t hold back her giggles anymore as she watches the two of them glare at each other, poorly contained smiles on their faces. “We did say on three, Sashy.”

Sasha gasps, her jaw falling to the floor. “You traitor!” Sasha shouts, her eyes gleaming in a way Marcy hasn’t seen for a while.

“Uh oh, Marbles, you made her mad,” Anne snickers, eyes flitting between the pair, a huge grin on her face.

Shit.

Marcy had a three second head start, only reaching the couch before arms wrapped around her waist and she was tugged down onto the couch, effectively trapped under Sasha, unable to do much more than accept the sloppy kiss, a grin stretching across her face as Sasha giggles.

Maybe their world would change, but Marcy didn’t care about that, not when Sasha looked so happy.

[enhyupn]

ᨦ enha as your best friend’s brother! ‹𝟹 part one

part two

pairing: enhypen’s hyung line x gn!reader

genre: fluff + head canons 💭 this is kinda short though sorry Besties

warnings: none!

a/n this wasn’t requested i just like doing stuff like this AHHAHAH but if u wanna request anything i’ll gladly do it if it’s not anything that makes me uncomfortable <3

𖥻 heeseung

heeseung is like that guy you always say you don’t have a crush on because everyone has a crush on him and you didn’t want to compete for his love </3

your best friend obviously introduced you to heeseung as if he was like another friend

i get the feeling that heeseung is the type to be like really close with their sibling

you obviously LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT!!!! with heeseung because like,,, he’s heeseung do i need to say more?

you get really shy around him

but he loves it honestly

he always calls out your name whenever you’re at their house to get your attention

or he teases you whenever he gets the chance

he likes seeing you stutter over your words and you getting shy

“y/n!” “hey h-heeseung” “i see you’re back here, i feel like you should move in at this point” “Ha Ha. y-yeah”

your best friend can tell you are interested in him too

being the good friend and sibling they are <3 they decided to set you two up

they actually give hints to heeseung abt you

“y/n likes you” okay maybe Not the most subtle of hints

but thank god heeseung is oblivious to things like this

“oh they’re very nice i like them too!”

your best friend wants to strangle him.

it’s an endless circle

you’re fine with it all though

you like the relationship you have with him he also likes it too

the shy replies and eye contact will just have to carry on until heeseung finally opens his eyes!

which spoiler alert will be very soon...

rest of the hcs under the cut!

𖥻 jay

please listen to me when i say jay’s the type of sibling that avoids his sibling’s friends AT ALL TIMES

like you two don’t know why he just doesn’t acknowledge you at all but it’s just the norm at this point

you can’t even get to say “hi” or a “how are you” without him speed walking away to get to his room

you complain to your friend abt it all the time

“why does your brother ignore me” “i don’t know... but why? do you wanna talk to him?” “of course not... hahaha definitely not”

you definitely did

you would try so many times too

especially when you saw his friends over too

you’ve talked more to sunghoon and jake more than your best friend’s older brother </3

“hey sunghoon! hey jake! hey—” AND THEN JAY JUST RUNS UP THE STAIRS

your best friend finds this hilarious

jay’s usually such a chatty and outgoing person and now all of a sudden he can’t even say hi to you?

your best friend thinks something is up.

“do you like y/n” “WHAT NO” “you’re bright red jay”

well that answered their question

now all your best friend has in their head is their older brother having a crush on you

it kinda grossed them out honestly

but were very happy for you <3

jay on the other hand wasn’t.

your best friend had a tendency to. Tell everyone Everything.

he was scared they were gonna spill the beans

thankfully they didn’t though!

they find jay staring at you from the kitchen in adoration hilariously

plus they know jay’s gonna do something abt it soon

or maybe you’ll be the one to make the first move???? hmmmmm 🤨🤨

𖥻 jake

jake walks you home whenever your best friend isn’t there to make it

so obviously! you would start liking him through that

i mean who wouldn’t? some crazy good looking guy walks you home with great care too, it’s not your fault you have a crush on him

jake also tutors you in physics (my little science and math genius 😫)

you can’t focus at ALL because HELLO!!!! JAKE SIM IS TRYING TO TEACH YOU ABOUT NEWTON’S LAW!!!!

anyone else would kill a person to be in your place

i mean... then again it’s jake sim so like... understandable!

you never tell you best friend any of this

the embarrassment of having the hots for your best friend’s brother is so cliché that you just can’t say it

i mean obviously your friend has their suspicions

the way you giddily call them after walking home with jake and the amount of times they’ve seen jake bounce around the room after a tutoring session is a little.... eyebrow raising

they don’t wanna do anything abt it because y’know maybe they’re just looking too deep into it?

no they’re 100% right you two are suspicious

even jake’s friends knew something was off...

i mean blushy cheeks... giggling at his phone... something was definitely up!

jake also seems like the type of brother that gets his sibling and their friends food

he ALWAYS remembers what you like

it kinda makes your best friend mad cause he never gets their snacks right. Just You.

maybe that should of been the last straw

but jake doesn’t care honestly

he only sees you whenever your with his sibling

but he thinks you only see him as you best friend’s older brother and your physics tutor... </3

he’s wrong btw

𖥻 sunghoon

sunghoon is NOT. a heart breaker. i REPEAT!!!! PARK SUNGHOON IS NOT A HEART BREAKER

but your best friend always tells you that if you get near him you will be heart broken!!

it’s not because he’s a player obviously or anything like a stereotypical bad boy

your best friend has just seen girls get their hearts Shattered by sunghoon politely rejecting them

i mean at first you weren’t going to pull any moves on him

but then he started talking to you, making jokes and simple just. Paying attention to you

that’s when you cracked

you were freaking out

what would your best friend say??? would they best friend break up with you????

at this point your best friend completely forgot that they said this to you so you were freaking out for no reason

you started to ignore sunghoon more

your bff noticed too and confronted you

“why are you ignoring my brother?” “WHAT NO... I AM DEFINITELY NOT GOING OUT OF MY WAY TO NOT SEE SUNGHOON...” “why are you screaming”

it’s not like they cared

it’s just sunghoon kept Annoying them abt it

“why is y/n ignoring me” “as if i would know” “DID I DO SOMETHING??”

he’s very. Stressed over this

this is when your best friend made you talk to him

you were obviously very scared you were gonna lose your best friend

but then you thought, hey. they’re asking me to do this so it’s fine!

so you did it

and BOY sunghoon was over the moon

“hi sunghoon how was your day” “MY DAY WAS REALLYGOOD WHAT ABOUT YOU Y/N!”

right after that he went back to being the cool, untouchable sunghoon you knew him as

all that changed was the small glances he was took when you walked past him

and also maybe a blush tinting his cheeks when you talk to him too

[puchiponn]

Genshin impact driving headcanons

I'm in a car rn and It got me thinking, what if I made genshin driving hcs?? I haven't seen one b4,, so,,

Charas include; childe, zhongli, kaeya, ayato, thoma, jean, paimon, ei, timmie

Comment who I should do next!

Childe

THIS MAN WOULD DEFO TREAT IT LIKE BUMPER CARS ISTG,,

HE'D GET INTO SUDDEN RACES W STRANGERS

AND ALL THE MECHANICS IN THE CITY KNOW HIS NAME.

He CAN drive properly, but he wants to scare you. Not to mention he DOES have the money.

He's in line to be the next archon of speeding tickets.

Zhongli

He doesn't drive. Childe doubles as his personal chauffeur.

This man travels w ✨STYLE✨

But not his wallet

He never gives childe gas money.

Though if he had to drive, he'd defo crash the car.

All these buttons r too high-tech for this 6000+ yr old boomer

But don't worry! The car is fine thanks to his geo shield!

Kaeya

This man would be very picky w cars. He only drives sexy cars.

Definitely drunk drives.

The type to pick ppl up by readjusting his dark sunglasses and saying "hey bbgorl r u lost?" W the most shit eating grin you've ever seen.

Prolly has a body or two in the car trunk but it doesn't matter.

When he's not drunk he's pretty law abiding when driving. Kinda. But only because of Jean.

Plays WAP on loop in his car. Especially when a sister from the church decides to hitch a ride.

Ayato

He drives properly. He drives well. A bit too well considering he rarely drives.

Except when thoma is in the car. He becomes childe 2.0

He will stop by EVERY Boba place. And nothing can stop him.

Wdym that's too much boba?? Have you seen the never-ending supply of armpit Boba he has??

Ayato is a law abiding responsible driver for the most part. He IS the head of the yashiro commission after all.

Thoma

He takes the wheel whenever ayato is having too much fun. We can't let him crash the 69th car this month.

He has a mini heart attack everytime ayato sits in the driver's seat.

Thoma drives the kamisato siblings everywhere.

It's his duty as their servant! Defo not bc he doubts his masters or anything! OKAY. MAYBE HE'S A LITTLE WORRIED ABT THEM.

Long drives w thoma would be rly relaxing. There will be a comfortable silence and occasional small talk between you two. Unfortunately, his gentle voice quickly lulls you to sleep, so you can't admire his side profile and jawline for too long.

Jean

Like thoma, she is responsible.

THIS WOMAN IS A RESPONSIBLE, RELIABLE, GOOD AT DRIVING, WON'T CAUSE YOU ANY CONCUSSIONS IN AN ACCIDENT BC SHE WONT GET INTO ONE, OVERALL SUPER DOORMAT LIKE driver.

She doesn't drunk drive.

She doesn't get speeding tickets.

She stops at red lights.

She doesn't get into rando races.

She is a v good driver.

If you want to live another day, have Jean drive you. It's the safest bet and will defo save you from 2 hrs of wap/cocomelon on loop. Unless kaeya and Klee decided it'd be a funny joke.

Paimon

Paimon is physically too small to drive. The only car she can drive is this one

The cart will be loaded w snacks and traveller has to push.

It's alright traveller! Paimon isn't heavy!

Paimon floats even in the mini car :D

Ei

She can't drive. Yae miko and Sara drive her.

She doesn't even know how to start a car.

She's great at charging electric ones though! When you tell her it's an electric car, she tries to control it with her powers, but then only realizes that she completely destroyed the car after a very loud "BOOM"

She'll then nervously ask how much it costed... can she borrow a loan from the 3 commissions first?? That's a lot of money! Sorry traveller!!

She was revoked of driving privileges. Use the teleport waypoints!!

Even the fish can drive better than you!!

But it's a part of your charm! We love you ei!

Timmie

Underage.

But if he had a car, it's a communal pigeon toilet!

It's not a car, it's a fucking truck full of pigeons n pigeon shit. You'd mistake it for a cement truck.

From Timmie's car, squawking is heard daily. Apparently ganyu, Sara and venti killing his birds daily gave him a corruption arc n he started imprisoning his pigeons in a car !??

[cornfarm]

hiii i wanted to share my gintama oc because i've been developing her for literally 5 years at this point and i think i'm finally settled on it!!

here's some artwork i've made for her:

so info abt her^__^

her name is anzai yae, and she's an amanto immigrant! she's 24, and she owns a small specialty shop in kabukicho.

at her little shop, she sells a wide variety of things, such as small pasteries and drinks native to her home planet, as well as smoking and alcohol products. her store hours are very strange- she opens up shop at noon, and closes around 2am! she has a garden in the back of the store. because her home planet is not in great communication with earth, her shop is a very popular place to hang out at since it has lots of rare food!

yae isn't techincally allowed to sell her smoking products, since the materials used to make them are unliscensed in edo's official health records. basically, they don't know what it is, so she's not allowed to sell it. because she doesn't have a visa, she can't apply for a license to sell her smoking products. she techincally can't do that much bc of her lack of documentation but she cheeses it barely within the law.

the shinsengumi frequents the store being like "miss anzai you can't sell this", and frequently threatens closing the shop, but after an incident when her home planets government threatened the shinsengumi, they begrudgingly give her a pass to continue selling. she saved their asses, and they were like "damn... we'll give you a pass as long as you don't cause any trouble... as a treat..." which she is very well behaved (within the law) <3

backstory! she's a war criminal! she served during a 5 year long war between her country, the empire, and a neighboring one, the kingdom. she grew up in a monastery, being trained and conditioned since a young age to become a weapon of war. she's very strong, and was nicknamed "executioner anzai" during the war, for her very cutthroat and remorseless style of killing. i have so much lore about this but i will stop here.

she has lots of arrow scars on her abdomen- she rode on a dragon during the war, and was frequently targeted by archers. she was essentially a weapon of war. she used her spear to strike thunder down onto her opponents- her hearing is poor because of this.

because of how she was raised, she has no sense of identity, no hobbies, no desires, no dreams, nothing. all she knows is that she wants to live freely. she wants to be liberated from her past of blind servitutde, and her craftsmanship making jewelry and weapons and food and custom rolled cigars is how her desire to live free has manifested.

she's comically unpredictable. at times she scolds the yorozuya for their antics, and at others she not only joins them, but goes one step higher than them. it seems like her moral compass is broken, the needle pointing in all different random directions. she also tends to do very abnormal things totally nonchalant, thinking that whatever abnormal thing she just did was normal. it's not cultural.

she's frequently seen staring very intensely at people she recognizes, but wont talk to them. she looks sad and dead all the time but she's actually just contemplating very silly and mundane things like if she should treat herself to dessert, or when it's going to rain. she just looks very o__o.

she comes off as distant and mysterious upon meeting her. the yorozuya's first impression of her was "yeah, this chick is definitely hiding something really good", and yes, she is hiding stuff, she actually just comes off that way out of shyness. they're almost a little disappointed when they find this out, but their persistent advances towards her gives her a sense of ease and she becomes significantly less stiff and much more animated.

she's very strong willed, especially when she learns how she wants to live her life. she is scarily devoted to her idea of peace, and would, albeit very sadly, betray her friends to achieve it. ironically, she also learns to want to love and protect things other than herself. her blind submission to the empire was both rooted in isolation as well as fear of what would happen to her if she said no, and now that she's been freed of that part of her past, she can begin to love others for the sake of love.

this poses conflict, though, when she's put in situations where to maintain peace in her life, she must hurt the ones she loves. her brain kinda short circuits and doesn't know what to do. and although she usually makes the right choices when in difficult moments, it's a challenge nonetheless .

ummmm that's kinda all i wanna share ^__^ i have so much more lore but that's all to say that i don't want her to be a mary sue or anything.

i know there is a lot of text, but if u have anything to say abt her, or share ur own oc then pls!!! my askbox is open for a reason :D

[xiu21chen99]

hxh headcanon/imagine.

again... still about hisoillu but about their engagement instead of illu's influenced fashion choice.

also this is more of... idk it gave reason why they chose to marry instead of uh other ways i guess??

i've seen so many fanarts where illu would break the news to the zoldycks or how killu would react to having hisoka as his brother in law- like srsly it's meme worthy at this point- and lotsa ones that showed how hisoka proposed as a joke or smtg but... I've been overthinking abt it these past few days sO i present to you how i think "the big question aka the proposal" happened... (manga spoilers??)

it's after hisoka resurrected himself obviously, and def after he killed kortopi and shalnark (so he knew there was gonna be empty slots in the spiders' lineup)

i imagine illu went back to the zoldyck estate after the whole fiasco and only heard of hisoka's "death" from rumors while he was on a mission

and then when he was idk maybe contemplating on whether or not he should visit the body(?) to pay respects or something, he gets a text message from the devil himself

their text went like this probably:

hisoka: hey~ where are you right now?♠️ (and no u can't tell me hisoka doesn't text w card suits u just can't-)

illumi: who are you and how did you get the phone you are currently using?

hisoka: ooh~ illu~ i feel betrayed, did you delete my number?♣️

illumi: hisoka is dead

hisoka: *image attached*

illumi: oh

illumi: hello hisoka, how are you still alive?

hisoka: you sound disappointed~♦️

illumi: i kind of am...

hisoka: rude, just tell me where you are♥️

...and that's how they met up?? ngl i think illu has a know-it-all syndrome where he just has to,,, k n o w everything

he's curious so he agrees to the meetup ofc

he's also surprised when he sees hisoka is in good shape when they meet (idk at a bar in an unknown city?)

they drink whiskey on the rocks because... you know...

hisoka explains how he survived and his next plan of action (which is terminate the spiders)

illumi makes a mental note of nen after death bc he's heard and seen it all before but... not to this extent,

this is gonna be,,, bland but i think this is the logic behind why hisoka chose to get married/engaged instead of just paying up front (reference to the ten dons' commission to get chrollo killed and chrollo's commission to get the ten dons killed)--

anyways here's how their conversation goes:

i: "why did you want to talk in person?"

h: "oh y'know, for old times sake."

i: "...right"

hisoka laughs, "okay so maybe i want to ask you for a favor..?"

confused, illumi asks, "why could you not have just texted if you wanted me to kill someone for you?"

h: "no, no- wait, actually, you're not too far off."

i: ~mOrE cOnfUsiOn~ "huh?"

h: "how do contracts for assassination work in your... family business?"

i: "half the promised pay before, the remaining half afterwards. should the target be eliminated by a third party, the assigned zoldyck still gets the pay and should the employer die, then the contract is terminated and the zoldyck will report back immediately."

h: "and has anyone made a contract to have themselves terminated?"

i: "i beg your pardon?"

h: "what complications will arise should your employer's target be... themselves?"

i: "i believe... i have never encountered such circumstance before. the people who hire us are those who have enough money and resource to have their enemies killed quickly. no one's tried to test the zoldyck assassination prowess."

h: "so... how will that work?"

i: "are you implying this is the reason why you have contacted me today?"

h: "yes~ ♥️" (how he said a heart emoji out loud is up to you, reader)

i: "it will be a pointless paradox. logically, the zoldyck will only get the employment bill. and i, myself, do not find pleasure in going for the kill like you lest i get my reward, so you will not get a contract out of me, hisoka."

h: "is there no leeway?"

i: "a zoldyck stands up to their word. so no."

h: "even for a friend?~ ♦️"

i: "we are not friends, hisoka-"

hisoka raises his glass of whiskey along with his eyebrow.

i: "oh..."

h: "didn't you tell dear killua that a zoldyck didn't need friends?"

i: "you... are an associate, someone reliable in the killing world. it's different."

h: "hypocrite"

i: "i ask you for favors and you make me return them. it is not like we spend our time together leisurely like killu with that island boy..."

hisoka clinks their matching glasses of whiskey even though his is already empty, a shit-eating grin on his lips.

i: "you suggested we meet here."

h: "this isn't the first time we went out to drink, right illu?"

i: "regardless!! i will not kill you just for half the money. i do not like wasting efforts on fruitless missions."

h: "as i said, is there no exception, to make sure you get my money if you were to succeed in killing me?"

i: "are you doubting my skill, hisoka?"

h: "that's not the point right now~ ♠️"

i: "wait, why do you want me to get all of your money?"

h: "haven't we just gotten over this subject? because you're my friend, of course."

i: "i... we are not friends, hisoka."

hisoka claps, "that's it! illumi!! ♣️"

i: "eh?"

h: "marry me! that way in our prenup I'll make sure you get all of my money, and even without a prenup you'll still get it since you'll be my only relative! that solves it!"

i: "hisoka, are you sure death did not took a toll on your brain? you did say you used Bungee Gum only on your heart and lungs..."

h: "i'm being serious, illumi!! and doesn't this solve your earlier conflict? we don't have to be friends, we'll be husbands!"

i: "do not use that tactic with me, you manipulative bastard. stop joking."

h: "this is purely beneficial for you, honestly i don't get why you just won't accept it."

i: "then humor me this first, why now?"

h: "dear illu, i've been to literal hell and back. i think it's time to leave my mark in case i fail to escape death again."

i: "was it that bad?"

h: "you'll love it there, illu~ ♥️"

h: "on a more serious note, though, i do plan to marry you. out of everyone i've encountered, you're the most eligible candidate. you're powerful, fully capable and extremely pretty to boot! you're the ideal husband!"

(blushing obviously, illumi downs the remaining whiskey in his glass) i: "death has changed you, hisoka."

h: "so?"

i: "fine."

h: "excellent!"

and in one fell swoop, illumi has a pin against the curve of hisoka's jugular, wrist held tightly by hisoka- a card matching against his own neck.

"not yet, dear husband." hisoka whispered into his ear, "we have to manage the papers first. and i've a request before you do."

they let each other go at the same time, not even breathing an unnecessary breath in the other's personal space (well, they're nearly pressed thigh to thigh anyways, what's the point of personal space anymore-)

"a condition rather than a request, really."

"what?" hisoka orders them refills, and downs his when it arrives.

"join the ryodan first."

glass already pressed on thin lips, illumi's confused hum resonates softly into the concave utensil. "why?"

"so things can get more interesting. i assume you know of the dark continent expedition that's soon to take place?"

"father has advised i take part on it, since kalluto told me the ryodan plans to rob some cliches who'll join the expedition- to look after him. you want me to join them?"

"yes, and i plan to board as well, don't fret."

illumi's eyes turn to slits, "how should i know you would be there? i can't take your word when you might just disappear when we've all boarded."

hisoka grins, wide then wider, "you should know by now illu, i plan to avenge my wounded pride. that damned chrollo didn't even fight me properly."

tilting his head, illumi stared at the man beside him, "is that not contradictory? i thought you did not mind your opponent using whatever means necessary to win?"

"magicians use tricks and misdirection to awe the audience," hisoka says almost thoughtlessly, "chrollo's a narcissistic hypnotist who used the audience as a damned shield because he knew he couldn't handle me face-to-face."

he groans, tinged in regret. "i shouldn't have picked heaven's arena, if i'd chosen a more discreet location then maybe the damage won't be this bad."

"damage?" illumi rests his chin on his palm, facing his husband.

hisoka swipes a hand over his face, and the glamour comes off. the picture he sent illumi now present in front of him. he was missing a nose, his left hand didn't have any finger left and dried blood chipped on his white skin. "oh."

with another swipe, everything's made correct again. hisoka was grinning again. he downs the remaining alcohol and leaves jenny bills under the emptied glass.

"come, lovely husband. we're to elope and legalize our union!"

illumi follows suit after downing his own glass, "i think there might be another loop hole, if you were to join the family. zoldycks do not kill family."

"so if i were to wed you, here and now, you'd think me more of a family than alluka?"

"alluka is not family."

"are those your words, illumi? or silva's?"

"i..."

"wow, you're really just as fucked up as i am."

"where do you plan to take me? i've just said i cannot kill family."

hisoka chuckles, "then you're the one to take my name, of course."

"preposterous!"

"who the hell still uses that word?"

"i am and will always be a zoldyck-"

"exactly. it's just legal papers, if you kill me then you'll just be a widow and even get your name back! see how everything'll work out in the end?"

"hisoka-"

"are you doubting your skill of assassination, my dearest husband?"

"... i better get the most expensive ring in this damned city."

"that's the spirit! now let's go get married!"

"wait, hisoka. what is your last name?"

later that night, when they leave a chapel, something gold glimmers on hisoka's bungee gum/texture surprise ring finger. a matching one around illumi's finger.

unlike hisoka, though, illumi had an extra red glimmer right under that gold, in the dead center of a silver band of intricately designed pattern. hisoka had foregone the traditional diamond in favor of a 16 carat ruby engagement ring, such a curious choice but illumi accepted it all the same...

(much later on, hisoka took both rings as collateral and reminded illumi that he would get them back even if he died bc it was in their damn prenup- and bc it was technically bought under illumis name and that's how hisoka assured illu that he'd be on that black whale,,, bc he had the rings and planned to give them back to him there)

"I thought a red gemstone was better suited for the rather bloody and murderous ending that our relationship will inevitably come to, wouldn't you agree?"

-Hisoka Morow whenever someone mentions his preference of proposal ring...

"I disagree with most of his ideals, our relationship has always had a fragile foundation, and I knew from the start that we'd eventually end up killing each other."

-Illumi Morow, nee Zoldyck when asked about his thoughts on his husband...

[heavymetalchemist]

I agree w/ some points u made in ur meta abt jiang cheng, but wwx wasnt just a sworn brother. they literally grew up side by side and yet he was wilfully blind to wwx's nature that should have made jc trust him: wwx's goodness, his tenacity, his selflessness. jc knew him and yet in his grief and anger and haste to blame someone he pours it all on his brother who, as selfless and self-loathing as he is, accepts all the blame. It's not abt the lie, but that jc chose to believe the lie.

I’m guessing this is in response to this post and to clarify, Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian ARE brothers, and I didn’t mean to diminish that by comparing the blind trust to Lan Xichen and the Venerated Triad.

However, here’s the thing, like, what lie are we talking about? Because the lie I’m referring to in that post is multifaceted:

Your golden core has been restored by Baoshan Sanren

I’m totally fine

I can absolutely control all this resentful energy and this new cultivation method isn’t hurting me at all

I don’t carry my sword any more because I don’t feel like it, even though it is very publicly rude of me not to

You cannot rely on me to help you run the sect because I am off in a tavern drinking all day, stumbling home drunk, but again, I’m totally fine and have nothing to discuss with you about my mental state at all, I swear I am just a fun-loving guy!

I have said before on my blog that I don’t like good person/bad person dichotomy, for a number of reasons, but primarily because it implies a static state of being and causes a willful blindness to harm people cause. People are complex, and while I do think intent matters, it’s not magic. Wei Wuxian gives up his golden core for Jiang Cheng, with all the good intentions in the world, but he does this without consulting Jiang Cheng, lying to him about it, drugging him to perform experimental surgery, dealing with the trauma of three months in the burial mounds and not having a core alone and absolutely refusing and rebuffing every overture Jiang Cheng makes trying to figure out what’s wrong with him, causing a lot of political problems with his behavior that Jiang Cheng then has to smooth over (and the Jiang sect is in a very fragile place, politically), then busting into a prison camp and killing ALL the guards with a fierce corpse and running off to the burial mounds with the last of the Wen cultivators.

And even with all of this, Jiang Cheng still defends and cares about him, they have that entire staged fight after Wei Wuxian insists on leaving the Jiang sect, which to Jiang Cheng is a betrayal of his promise to be with him in leading the sect, but Wei Wuxian does not tell Jiang Cheng about the whole surgery thing so he really doesn’t have a clue about how much Wen Qing and Wen Ning did for him (although, of course, if he had known about it he would never have let them do it, I’m sure).

From Jiang Cheng’s perspective, how is he supposed to trust in this goodness and selflessness? WWX is throwing the Jiang sect under the bus. WWX is not helping rebuild the sect, he’s drinking all day. (Of course he’s traumatized, they’re ALL traumatized, but he’s not talking about it so how can JC help?) WWX murders a bunch of Jin sect cultivators, running off with a bunch of prisoners of war, from the sect that attempted a full-scale genocide of the Jiang sect. (And to be clear I do not condemn this action and think that Blood Feuds Are Bad, however, in context this is a world where blood feuds are a very real thing. Personally I like the AU where they get Nie Mingjue on their side, as the Nie sect actually has a lot of power that the Jiang sect simply doesn’t, and therefore they can protect the Wen remnants that way. But I digress.)

Not to mention, WWX is using demonic cultivation, corpses are running around, he’s thrumming with resentful energy. Not a good look.

And then Jin Zixuan gets his heart punched out. In CQL there’s a second flautist, but in the book he simply loses control (the control he SWORE he had) and even in CQL it’s not like we find out about the second flautist until the end. How is JC supposed to trust in WWX’s goodness when he’s just murdered his brother-in-law? When he’s abandoned his family and sect for the people that murdered them? (YES I know the Dafan Wens weren’t involved in actively killing people but this is the whole blood-feud-thing, audience knowledge is not character knowledge, etc.)

And then at Nightless City, WWX loses control AGAIN (or at least appears to), three thousand people get murdered, Yanli dies, and JC STILL can’t actually stab him. JC was DESPERATE for any sort of explanation or reason of why this was all happening, but over and over WWX said it was fine, and the real takeaway for JC by the time Nightless City rolls around is - this man is not the boy I grew up with, this man is no longer my brother, my brother would NEVER do this would NEVER hurt Yanli, so it can’t be him any more.

It’s not unlike knowing someone who becomes addicted to drugs. Someone you knew and loved becomes an alcoholic and their whole life goes up in flames and then they’re drunk driving and then they kill someone doing it, and how long are you supposed to sit there while they destroy themselves, telling yourself that you know they’re a good person on the inside?

Now all that said, on the OTHER hand, if you’re talking about the lies that the other sect leaders were spouting, about how WWX was speaking against JC, about how he doesn’t respect him, etc?  You are SO right and it pains me so much that JC didn’t have the ability to stand up to those assholes and say “He’s my brother, shut the fuck up” a la Yanli to Zixun at Phoenix Mountain. Even with all the crap going on in the background, it was obvious to the other (older!) sect leaders that WWX was very powerful and very close to JC and they deliberately tried to undermine the Jiang sect and I hate them. That plays into a lot of the trauma that JC personally has but yes, I think that’s one of the failings that haunts him - how could I have listened to their poisoned words at all?

[averlym]

omg.

omg.

hello???????? that au i'm- hello??? bestie??? your mind omg

literally at a loss for words rn that was beautiful. i read through the whole thing and omgggggg i wish i could elaborate further on the absolute joy and delight your au gave me but i'm not very good at articulating D:

but like. omg. by the way you are legally never allowed to say anything of detriment regarding your writing skills again because exCUSE ME that is some top-tier 5 star high quality writing right there-

legit the same abt culture though... speaking of which i hope u had a nice winter solstice!! idk the actual name of it in chinese (my family doesn't really celebrate it) but !! either way i know it was really recent so uh yeah :D

sobbing time what time. it's so ironic that i literally have to study the physics of time for one of my science olympiad events and yet time is the one thing i lack. "it's about time" is it really, though??? maybe time doesn't exist. it's all a lie. a hoax. time dilation is wack as heck i think it should be illegal that if one half of a pair of twins went on a speed of light space journey and came back a perceived 4 years later or something his twin would actually be 6 years older (NOT ACCURATE BUT I DIGRESS)

maybe time doesn't exist and einstein was wrong. placnk's law only exists if you want it to and i certainly don't. the 4th dimension doesn't have to be spacetime maybe it's a hidden eye that only shrimp can see.

(i'm so sorry for rambling omg)

uhhh h h hh yeah! i think i had a lot more to say buuut it's getting late for me (and also i have no focus ability ahahaha save me) so! more hugs, i hope you're doing amazing, and all that awesome stuff!!

-teanon!! (return of the scuffed older-than-me-i-think pc haha)

the pure serotonin this ask gave me

because i have no time to draw the comic the beiguang fic is below the cut for your reading pleasure

they are up in her floating palace of plaustrite, and it is an afternoon of negotiations. and liyue millennial.

beidou smirks across the board, and ningguang uses a perfectly manicured fingernail to knock over her chief piece. she won't admit it out loud, but she enjoys the challenge, and if that means she has to make some... concessions of her own, she is more than willing to accept it.

across from her, there is an victorious cry, and the piece is swooped up and tossed in the air, then caught deftly. the process is repeated several times, much like how that mondstatian cavalry captain does with mora. (she wonders idly if this is a habit that comes with eyepatches.)

"don't drop it, or you'll be owing me more mora than you already do," she cautions beidou, and the piece is placed back on the table. it is a miniature replica of the jade chamber, and floats with plaustrite, but if thrown hard enough, could always fall with the momentum and smash. ningguang does not care much for the thought of her jade chamber falling and being destroyed, no matter if it is a model version.

there's a signature cocky grin as beidou teases her. "why, lady tianquan, i was unaware that you were such a sore loser! did i not just win back the mora i owed you through fines?"

ningguang sips her cup of tea and tries not to smile at the pirate's antics. "merely the fines for your illegal trading," she points out, continuing, "ganyu has pressed me into ensuring i collect the taxes from trading that you do owe the qixing, and i am unwilling to wager that on chess and risk upsetting her."

"that's fine, i suppose," huffs beidou, conceding. ningguang is familiar with her soft spot for the half-adeptus secretary, and how beidou has often given in to the unrelenting stubbornness of someone thousands of years old. if it's ganyu pressing, few deny her. beidou knows it, and ningguang does too.

(she likes to think she knows the woman in front of her well enough for that, at least.)

"besides, the jade chamber is mine, and i much dislike having what is mine broken," she reminds beidou. there is an underlying subtext here, hidden in how ningguang gets upset when beidou comes back with new wounds, not quite healed. beidou is also, in a way, hers, this confident pirate captain with tilted smiles and a gleam in her eye. and ningguang dislikes what is hers being broken, takes care of beidou until wounds heal into scars, offers her guest room in place of a ship's hammock.

(she'd cried once, snapping, "why do you keep going out and hurting yourself," and beidou had looked torn between comforting her and snapping right back. ningguang dislikes what is hers being broken.)

beidou, across the table, not quite across the sea yet, softens. "ning," she says, looking at her with quiet affection.

"i dislike losing what is mine, too," she hears herself say, and beidou watches her, brow creased with confused concern, eyes flitting to the small jade chamber floating innocently between them.

ningguang follows her eyes, and stifles a laugh. she glances a bit pointedly at beidou, then pushes the piece gently towards her. this is not about the game they had just played- in the long game, she has yet to win or accept defeat. "i dislike losing what is mine," she repeats, voice softer, "but i do not mind, once in a while, losing to you."

unsaid are the words, "but i would mind losing you." it is still written in the space between them, as good a confession as any, hovering in the air like the tiny jade chamber. beidou accepts it, and cups it with gentle grace. holds it in her two palms, as liyue custom dictates one should receive a gift.

to anyone else, this would be surprising from the rough-and-tumble captain of the crux fleet. ningguang knows beidou better.

but she never fully knows what that woman will do next, as evidenced by how it still takes her by surprise when beidou presses into her hands the miniature pirate ship that represents the alcor.

ningguang had won it near the end of the game, then passed the ship back to its rightful captain after the round had ended. here is beidou, freely giving it to her. "a fair trade. i do not mind losing to you once in a while, too," says beidou, hands warm against hers.

"i suppose we shall both find victory, then," ningguang laughs lightly. across from her, beidou is still leaning over the table, and ningguang's laugh is mirrored in her smile.

between them are their pieces, held in their hands. below them, liyue and the open seas of its harbour are spread out. but the wood of the model alcor holds beidou's warmth in ningguang's hands, and that warmth lingers in the model jade chamber by her side.

and isn't that what it comes to in the end? beidou is ningguang's, in a way, but also entirely her own. ningguang does not mind losing her to herself once in a while, as she sails to new seas. but beidou does not mind losing to ningguang once in a while either, returning to liyue where ningguang can offer her safe harbour.

ningguang's jade chamber is beidou's, and beidou's ship will freely return to ningguang's hands.

a/n: ningguang's jade chamber is rightfully won by beidou in the game!!! like how ningguang feels that beidou won her affection through her persistence and general beidou-ness!!! but she sees it as a gift when beidou gives the alcor to her because that's how she views beidou's affection!!!! and beidou just sees it as a fair trade because to her ningguang deserves it???? if ningguang shares with her it's only fair that she share with ningguang because that's how it works and if she is willing ofc beidou will love her in return and wbwskdks

also like beidou as an independent person in her own right and ningguang's possessiveness making the exception of she can lose beidou only if it is to beidou herself and that's shown in how she views beidou as an equal and,,, i just think that 'i am yours but also my own person' is a good basis for any committed relationship

[thisdreamplace]

I'm so close to giving up on practicing the law (consciously) overall. It's like yet another habit (of conscious manifesting, living like a king in a kingdom/reality etc) that I've failed to incorporate

However, like a chronic sufferer who actually wants a way out ie who seeks a chance of living differently and not permanently not living I really don't want to give up. But I'm so disheartened of this

Ik yk what it's like, and I'm aware of how u pushed thru despite everything, and yk very well what it's like when u too were on this side

I feel like I'm caught in the claws of a beast that grows larger and larger. Btw this isn't a msg abt 'im the only one for whom manifesting doesn't work'. (Coz I have, by consciously focusing etc, seen evidence of the law and all), so this ain't even about believing in something unseen

Maybe it's an info overload thing. Idk. Ik enough by now, to realise the core of it is to live like it's already happened, deliberate before reacting so u don't perpetuate the old patterns/story/consequences yadda yadda

So what should I do? How do I refocus? How do I stop thinking Idk enough (even tho even now im aware of how the 3d is an illusion etc and I think I've caught up on all the real free deal on manifesting, law of assumption on the 'net). I think I'm tired of reading up on it and implementing it. Ik it's effortless (and sometimes it really is!) Still, I want utter power over my reality (not micro managing like, but there are still major aspects of my life that I wanna change). What do u suggest? ig my question (or monologue, amirite? 😉) relates to how I feel I'm all over the place related to this. I mean, you can't measure a company's performance w/o numbers yeah? And I'm an analyst (tho the messy-desk sort who teeters b/w must-get-the-finest-details to aye-imma-wing-it: and I can't force myself to be either at will 😒) who's gotten a mind blank

So yeah, please, by all means, knock me on the head, give me a wake up call, throw a book or two at me. I've been enrolled in the manifesting course (figure of speech) for so long, yet I'm not focused enough to garner true results (not blaming the 3d, but I mean it's kinda obvi when u ARE working but there aren't much results, how's that different from day dreaming or wishful thinking yeah?)

In conclusion, also, any idea how I can improve? What could I do (or not do) (other than self concept. I oft subject myself to the I Am Love peeps and they're pretty cool and the stuff they say is 💯) How do I pull myself together?

Thanks for reading this far! Thank you overall! 😎

I know you asked about what you can do other than self concept and I'm sorry but my advice is going to be #1: self concept. haha If it wasn't for me deciding to give myself my all, I don't think I'd still be here.

Here's the craziest thing about the law: we come to the law because we desire for something, then find out it was never about our desire. It was always about us. You see, the more you keep your desires at the forefront of your life, without putting yourself first in line, the more complicated you make your journey. The truth is, nothing needs to change except you. So you don't want to hear my self concept advice, you want there to be anything else except self concept, but the truth is your conception of self is your everything. It is the foundation upon which your world is happening automatically. Change your conceptions of self and you change your world. Period.

I mean, even now this is important for you because of everything you are saying. If you truly want to use the law to your advantage and finally live the life you know you deserve, stop running away from yourself. Stop wanting your desires to fix your issues. Stop looking for a technique to make the magic happen. Only you can make this work. That's the thing about it. You've said you read enough, no? So at this point you should have some sort of idea of what you're into, what kind of things make sense to you. Actually start to apply it now. Like seriously. Dedicate the rest of the year to applying the law in the way that makes sense to you. Make sure your #1 goal is yourself. The only progress/change you need be worried about is a change within yourself.

If you want utter power you give it to yourself. And I'll be upfront. For some it's an easy and powerful experience. For me, it's been difficult, painful, and uncomfortable. But that's because I was so engulfed in my victim mentality for so many years. I wanted someone to come by so badly and save me and even after the law, I had a hard time giving that up. The more attached we are to the old story, the more difficult our journey will be. And that's okay. We have to be gentle with ourselves in those tough moments. It's not a race and you're doing everything perfectly. When I finally decided to take responsibility for myself was the moment my life changed for the better. More and more the law clicks and I feel more confident in who I am as God of my reality. But you have to be willing to leave that victim mentality behind you. How can you take on full power of your reality, while living like a victim? You automatically give your power away like that. So, drop it. No matter how scary and uncomfortable it is. You must.

There's a certain amount of mental discipline that must be practiced when it comes to the law. So for that, I recommend meditation. Any way you want to do it. No you don't need to be focused on the law all the time but you need to be aware who's in control of your reality. It's you. You don't get anytime off from being God, it's a full time job. That's why self concept is so important, because it's what is manifesting naturally 24/7. So the least you can do is make sure your foundation is one in which you actually want to be operating from.

Hopefully this helps to pick you up and give you some idea of where to go next on your journey! You absolutely got this! And don't forget to take care of yourself and look out for yourself as you continue on your manifestation journey. 💖

[atlascas]

DEANCAS FIC REC

(last updated 7/1)

FINALLY. this is like. just a place for me to rec and write excessively abt the fics i've been reading lately. it won't be organized but it WILL be very earnest and i'll keep it updated as i find/remember more. also i have obnoxiously high standards when it comes to fic so these ARE the cream of the crop, if u will. the god tier. the s tier. 

very loosely organized into "newer fic" and "classics." these are subjective categories. do what you will

✨ = new fic on the list

💖 = in my brain rent free!

CURRENTLY READING

these are the fics that i’m currently reading! may or may not get recced. usually i read the first couple paragraphs/lines and if i like the writing it gets bookmarked and put on this list.

lazarus needs a robe of scarlet thread by herrosesneverfall, 90k, canonverse au. dean starts getting stigmata. when i was getting back into spn there were a LOT of religious fics flying around bc that was the Hot Topic of Discussion. this was one of them

Three weeks ago, Dean woke up in a pine box. He thought dealing with the nightmares was going to be the most difficult part of his new life after Hell, but at least they were something he could understand. Something he could deal with. Something he deserved.

Then he began having agonizing visions of crucifixion. Wounds appeared on his body out of nowhere. Wounds that refused to heal and coated his skin with the sickly sweet smell of roses.

Stigmata are said to be the marks of saints, but Dean is not a saint and the wounds are only the beginning.

kingdom come by ahurston, 8.7k, coda to 15x18. cas gets to go home. im gathering all the s15 fix-its to my heart and holding them close

Cas wakes up on the coast of Maine. He makes his way home.

hunger by ellispark, 10.8k, s13 au. dean grieves cas, post s12 finale. perfect writing perfect awful heartwrenching characterization so far on dean’s end especially towards jack. nuanced emotional writing

Dean takes his meal and throws it away, plate and all. He's not hungry. How can he even begin to eat, knowing what he kept from Cas — what he kept from both of them?

They could have had something, and now all Dean has is this gaping, empty hole in his stomach, in his chest, and he has to learn to breathe and eat and move around it.

the law of equivalent exchange by awed_frog, 60.8k, canonverse. cas loving dean in all permutations of humanity, throughout time.

“And what’s the point of it?”

“Of love? There isn’t one. Loving is its own purpose.”

NEWER FIC

“newer” just means “i discovered it in 2020/2021 after coming back to spn fandom” so it very well could have been published before 2015 but really who’s checking. not me that’s for sure.

💖 so says the sword by komodobits, 85k, s4 au. cas guards the michael sword in the beautiful room. this is easily the MOST obvious rec on this entire list but it was the first fic i read when i got back into spn this year and jesus christ it set the bar sky fucking high. the way they create a coherent mythology out of the mess that is spn canon is incredible.

The briefing was simple: ‘Stand guard over the Michael Sword until the battle is ready to commence. Await further instructions.’

Castiel doesn’t mind working security duty; he was briefed shortly after the initial salvation of the Sword from the pit, and again before taking up his position. He knows what to do. However, it’s easy to forget that the green room isn’t real. Time moves differently there, the space ever-changing to make a prison of mountains, cathedrals, salt flats, orchards, and whatever Castiel was led to believe about Heaven’s greatest weapon—Dean Winchester is something entirely unexpected.

assimilation by komodobits, 5.6k, coda to 12x01. mary meets dean and cas and they go to find sam. such good character studies of all three of them. the best mary pov fic i’ve read

Mary always thought you were supposed to be able to tell. That you could just look at someone and know they were – you know. One of that sort. It’s not supposed to happen to her son.

cuckoo and nest by komodobits, 10k, ambiguously canonverse. dean and cas navigate relationship anxiety. cute, in character, and their relationship is realistic and the conflict well-written and emotionally nuanced and really really really good. 

For a long time, Castiel thought that every earthly possession other than the immediately necessary was excess to requirement. But Dean – Dean who named his car, who keeps a photograph of his mother in his wallet, some thirty-plus years after her death, who still has the crumpled ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign with a sleeping pelican emblazoned on it from the Microtel outside of Roanoke where he first kissed Castiel, clumsy and unsure, under the unsteady fluorescence of an exhausted bathroom bulb – is sentimental.

It puzzles Castiel, where Dean draws the line between what is meaningful and what it is worthless.

💖 one white lie by komodobits, 11k, au. cas panics when trying to ask dean out and has to fake being a jehovah’s witness. it’s adorable and hilarious and it’s been ages since i actually got butterflies at a kiss in a fic but this did it. it did it. it felt like someone swaddled my soul in a cashmere blanket and kissed me on the forehead

Castiel takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t need to run through what he’s going to say – he’s already planned and edited and rehearsed it a thousand times. He is going to ask Dean Winchester out to dinner. If it’s not too forward, he’ll say, perfectly charming. You see, I’ve seen you around the neighbourhood and you always seem so earnest and I’d really like to get to know you bette— The door swings open, and Castiel panics.

He intends to excuse himself. He means to apologise and come back some other time. However, in a moment of blind fear, what comes out of his mouth instead are the words, “Could you spare a moment for Jesus Christ?”

a crash course in someone else’s history by annie d (scaramouche), 11.5k, set during s6. cas comes to as his s4 self without any memories of the past two years and has to figure out what the fuck is going on. it’s kind of like so says the sword. you’ll know it when you get to it.

Castiel is captured inside a trapping circle of holy oil set by Dean and Sam Winchester. The brothers call him "Cas", claiming that he has amnesia and that he is obligated to help them take down Crowley to atone for his betrayal of them. It's the strangest story Castiel's ever heard, and one he doesn't have time for because he's only just raised Dean from Hell and has work to get back to.

💖 cas and dean’s adventures in gardening by ahurston, 19k, post-canon au. a series featuring dean and cas living in the bunker, human. cas is very into plants. i read this yesterday actually and it made me smile SO much it’s just so lovely and sweet. i’m also a sucker for any fic where cas has a garden. he deserves a fucking garden okay

In this post-God world, everything is different. A little quieter, a little softer. Cas grows a garden, Dean cooks, and they take care of each other.

tall grass by aeli_kindara, 57k, post-s12. dean and cas live in the bunker on their own, and cas grows a garden. i did say i love fics where cas has a garden. plus domesticity, plus some good case fic, PLUS dean and cas’ relationship is so gentle and good

“I think we should have a garden,” Cas says.

Dean looks up from his beer. He hasn’t had that much to drink, but Cas still has a vague look of unreality about him, a splash of living color that doesn’t fit in the bunker’s echoing stillness. Dean didn’t hear him coming. A lot of the time, Cas is so unobtrusive it feels like Dean has the bunker to himself, with Sam away.

Dean shakes his head to clear it. “A — garden?” he repeats.

in a week by renrub, 2.3k, post 15x18. cas is in the empty. dean saves him. this is genuinely the best “dean pulls cas out of the empty” fic i’ve read so far like conceptually this entire thing just fucks. when cas is cycling through the barn scene. god. SO well written

Castiel is outside a barn covered in sigils. He frowns. This isn’t right. This has never been something he repented for.

i won’t even wish for snow by annie d (scaramouche), 5.6k, college au. cas goes to the winchesters’ for christmas. honestly scaramouche fics belong in the classics section bc she’s like an og deancas writer but whatever. mistletoe! banter! good in-character au! this fic’s got it all

It’s the third year that Castiel’s spending Christmas with his best friend’s family, and he expects it to be much like the previous two. Then mistletoe happens.

convenient husbands by annie d (scaramouche), 39k, canonverse au. cas is a phoenix, dean is a hunter. they get married and have a sick psychic bond. unexpectedly fluffy considering how the fic starts and i love the banter so much and dean/cas’ relationship gets fleshed out and organically developed it’s very cute

"It's only temporary, right?" Dean says. "Just until you're healed up, and then we'll never have to see each other again. So what do you say, Castiel, do you want to marry me or not?"

cinderwings by bendingsignpost, 181k, cinderella au. cas goes to a masquerade ball to save his people from an eternity trapped in a void. he meets prince dean. i can’t tell u how much this fic drew me in - thru good worldbuilding, but mostly thru cas’ social awkwardness. like it works PERFECTLY to his advantage in this fic and reading how expertly he manipulates social situations w/o any fucking idea what he’s doing is both hilarious and inspiring

Under the cover of a masquerade ball, Castiel has five nights to recover the key to his people's freedom. The world has changed greatly in the six centuries since their banishment into the void, but the task isn't impossible. Unfortunately for Castiel, this is going to involve talking to people - especially the Knight Prince who has taken an interest in Castiel and his "costume" wings.

as the crow flies by bendingsignpost, 3.4k, au. dean and cas go on a roadtrip. cas has wings! it’s so dreamlike and meandering and the slowburn is so good. honestly it reminds me of stevebucky/stevesam post tws era roadtrip fics if ur hip LMAO

Cross country road trips with Cas are the best.

long-term relationship by bendingsignpost, 2.7k, au. dean and cas have a Serious Conversation about their relationship.

Castiel says, budging over to make room for Dean on the couch, “I thought we should have a serious talk about our relationship.”

Reflexively, Dean laughs.

Castiel does not.

“Uh, Cas... you know we’re not dating, right?”

all this and heaven too by ftmsteverogers, 7k, ambiguously canonverse. dean is trans. dean and cas are fucking and lowkey hiding it from sam. perfect character study PERFECT trans dean fic it’s so fucking well-written 

“Hey,” Dean said. “I’m not ashamed of you, okay?”

Cas raised skeptical eyes to meet his.

“I mean it,” Dean insisted.

“I understand you mean it,” Cas said. “But I don’t think it’s any better if you’re only ashamed of yourself.”

💖 the love story of the runner up by margo_kim, 4.7k, ambiguously canonverse. cas tries dating other men. bear with me here. this is an outside pov fic from an oc named miguel who is WONDERFULLY characterized and very endearing like i find outsider/oc pov to be on Thin Fucking Ice bc it always ends up as fandom/author self-insert but miguel is his OWN MAN. he gets his own lil arc and everything. dean and cas are concentrated perfectly crystallized versions of themselves and the little glimpses we get of them are amazing. ALSO i wrote like 9k of an spn vent fic (basically the same premise but w an oc named marcus) back in like. freshman yr of hs. so when i first opened this fic i was like what the fuck someone’s been in my google docs. very weird experience 10/10 regardless

“So you saw a white man in a trench coat pop out in an alley,” Paul says, “and you thought, what, ‘I want to see where this is going’?”

“If you get hung up on details like that,” Miguel says, “it will take a very long time to get through this story.”

For a very weird era in his life, Miguel dates an angel who is in love with another man.

sunshine by northernsparrow, 8k, set during s13. dean and cas have a long conversation about their Profound Bond. the description left me off-balance (it really. really truly says “dean is straight in this fic” like okay bro WEIRD hill to die on) but it pulled through w the relationship study and reassurance and snuggles. a sweet fic

One-shot with a single conversation between Dean and Castiel, set in a late-S13-ish world. Gabriel, Cas, Sam & Dean are all living in the bunker together, Gabe's been cracking certain jokes, Sam's found a certain book, Cas is injured and isn’t healing... and it's all making Dean wonder if his angel friend might have some sort of a "bond" with... somebody? Whatever that means.

Maybe it's time for a talk.

💖 still life by catchclaw, 16.5k, post-s8. cas, newly human, goes to live on his own for a while. he and dean maintain a relationship thru the phone. this is LITERALLY the only first person fic i fucking respect okay like i was skeptical! i really was! but the pov is PERFECT and also my man kevin tran is in this fic and i love him and miss him very much. oh and cas going off to explore humanity on his own..............perfect arc. very much in character we love that for him

Dean'd always thought that falling in love was a capital letter kind of thing, an Important Event you carved into the calendar of your life and never, ever forgot. But with he and Cas, it wasn't that simple.

it’s mostly cowardice, and bad timing by ferritin4, 1.6k, pre-canon. actually this one is just a dean study it’s not deancas but i spent an entire night looking for it and i need someone else to read it too. dean is smart!!! SAY THAT

Dean gets his GED.

a list of reasons the bunker shouldn’t get a sofa by lizbobjones, 5.6k, set during s12. sam and dean and mary and cas haul a sofa back to the bunker. cute domesticity and fluff

Let me count the ways that this is a terrible idea.

no kingdom to come by domesticadventures, 16.8k, canonverse. dean and cas deal with being stuck in quarantine in different ways. this is the one and only quarantine fic i’ve read and it’s really good lmao. dean and cas’ relationship is so organic and tentative in this one

“We should fuck,” Dean says.

Cas looks up from where he sits on his bed, hair still damp from the shower, frowning as he places a finger on the page of his book to mark where he left off.

There are a million things Cas could say here; Dean has rehearsed them. After lunch, his restlessness had given way to a vague panic, a dread that matched his every step and crept along with him from room to room. Eventually, he had returned to his bedroom and spent the rest of the afternoon pacing back and forth, playing out all the possible scenarios. When Cas asks him Why? or Are you being serious? or when he sighs and says, in that way he has, Dean, he knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s going to shrug casually, like he isn’t invested in the answer, like he isn’t desperate for an outlet, and say, Why not? He’s going to raise an eyebrow and say, What, are you not interested? He’s going to crowd into Cas’ personal space, he’s going to shove himself right up in there and whisper Cas against his ear.

Instead, Cas says, carefully, “Okay.”

till the juice runs by deathbanjo, 8.4k, canonverse. it’s like dean’s being cursed to have bad hookups with men. SUCH a funny fic and the deancas tension is so simple and sweet and GOOD. plus cas is so enjoyably characterized here he’s so human and worn in and experienced in his own unique way. perfect use of rowena too

Apparently whoever drew up the venn diagram of Dean’s sex life decided the circle labelled ‘good sex’ and the one labelled ‘sex with men’ should be kept far apart.

turn of the year by kototyph, 3.9k, canonverse au. sam and dean get stuck out in the middle of nowhere on the winter solstice. what i wouldn’t give for a full 80k of this verse actually. also i went on a kototyph binge after reading shut up put your money where your mouth is and they have a SOLID spn repertoire

Fifteen minutes later, Dean gets back in the car with empty hands and ice in his fucking eyebrows. “Get the map out,” he says through chattering teeth, sticking numb fingers under his arms.

Sam holds up the battered 1995 Rand MacNally they keep in the side pocket, turned to a page of uninterrupted green. “We’re going to die,” he announces.

💖 bullets in the gun by kototyph, 4.9k, canonverse au. cas is a cop (i know. still) who gets kidnapped by dean in an unfortunate turn of events. GOD this fic is SO FUNNY. cas’ canny and strategic escape attempts render him a very active VERY funny pov character plus the hate attraction to dean is PERFECTLY WRITTEN VERY BELIEVABLE. dean’s kindness also shines thru even as he literally holds cas hostage like!!!! PERFECT characterization. both of them are so LIKABLE here. if you read anything on this list read this

“Sorry, sweetheart, but I’m going to need to borrow your car.”

as you will by kototyph, 1.8k, victorian au. cas endures a proposal mishap. it’s cute it’s funny it’s sweet!

"No?" Castiel echoes, dumbly.

and if i was looking too? by kototyph, 2.6k, au. cas is undercover where dean works. this fic is just so cute like. bird angels.................

There are some things Castiel hasn't told Dean, and there are some things he doesn't need to.

the most important thing by northernsparrow, 94.5k, s10 au. amnesiac cas raising claire until he comes across someone familiar. claire is so well characterized here i really loved her arc thruout this fic. she just wants her dad back and u can’t even blame her the author rlly does an amazing job creating realistic and heartbreaking motivations for her. oh and dean and cas (esp cas characterization!) are sweet in this but honestly the highlight IS claire for me

Jimmy Novak remembers nothing of the last six years. Reunited with his troubled daughter Claire, he's struggling to raise her on his own. The most important thing is to make Claire happy. But why does he keep having these dreams of wings, and of two men in a black car? (Canon-divergent from S10E11, when we first met Claire again and Dean was still struggling with the Mark of Cain. Takes places several months later).

there’s only one sure thing that i know by blinkiesays, 20.3k, post-s5. dean goes to help cas out in ohio and they end up building a home together. i love the writing it’s rlly funny and sweet.

Dean doesn't even get halfway through explaining before Bobby starts laughing. When he lets himself think about it for more than five seconds, Dean can almost see Bobby's point: he's faced down demons, witches, vampires, werewolves, ghosts, angels, and Satan himself and now he's been defeated by the God damn Midwest.

💖 to an angel, love and worship are the same thing by geminisage, 10.3k, post s15 fix it. dean grieves cas - and then cas gets brought back back from the empty. i didn’t have this in my bookmarks so i MISSED it the first time around on this list but this was another one of the fics i came back to spn fandom to. it’s so fucking unique?? it actually reads like spn like i think fic tends to soften dean/cas up and makes them more emotional + emotionally intelligent than is ever shown in the show. here the dialogue/characterization adheres RIGOROUSLY to their communication in canon in that dean’s not overtly emotional, and cas is very reserved. they have to negotiate their relationship exactly like they would in the show. it’s all clipped conversation and anger and hurt and (warning btw) LOTS of internalized homophobia on dean’s end but it’s SO worth it. dean navigating his [GESTURES VAGUELY] everything is compellingly written, emotionally true, and PERFECTLY characterized. cas characterization also amazing like u rlly feel the quiet devoted bittersweet love. ok this was long clearly it’s a good fic go read it now

Just as Dean knew they would, the weeks do stretch into months, and then into a year. Grief never gets easier, Dean knows from experience, but you do get better at it. After all, you can get used to anything.

the violin house by teh_helenables, 8.5k, post-s5. dean and cas build a home after stull. so slow and lovely and sweet and gentle. i need to put this here so that i don’t forget it tbh. it’s very much dean as a war wife cas as the husband away on the front

The Apple Pie Life is a slow process, but Dean and Cas are getting there—until Cas is called for battle and Dean is forced to wait.

💖 muscle memory by komodobits, 18.9k, au. amnesiac cas wakes up three years in the future with dean in his kitchen. komodobits DOES NOT FUCKING MISS!!! i CRIED at the end of this i had NO INTENTION OF CRYING the rest of the fic isn’t even SAD i just had to sit there at the end of it w tears dribbling down my face. INSANE work of art

Dear Castiel,

Hello – it’s Castiel. This must all seem very confusing, and I’m sorry for that. Dean says to tell you that this isn’t some kind of ‘time-travel stunt’, although I’m sure that won’t be your first thought. I know it wasn’t mine. I’ve told Dean to leave now, as this is my notebook and I want everything in it to come from me – or rather, from you. I know you think it's the fifteenth of January, 2010, but it isn't. At the time of my writing this, the date is the fourth of October, 2013. Dean Winchester is your boyfriend of a year and a half, and you no longer work at the library, and in early 2010 you were hit by a car and hospitalised. I’m sorry.

a.k.a the 50 First Dates Dean/Cas AU where Castiel wakes up on a day just like any other, except that three years have passed without his knowing, and Dean Winchester is in the kitchen wanting to marry him.

don’t forget the experience points by annie d (scaramouche), 10.8k, au. cas is sam’s work friend, and he and dean get to know each other. genuinely an adorable fic. i adore cas’ characterization in this it’s snarky AND awkward AND confident in a way that i absolutely believe he would be if he had 30 yrs of human life under his belt

It's because Dean was an awesome brother than he took such an interest in Sam's new friend. No, really. What happened afterwards was mostly an accident.

actus fidei by manic_intent, 5.6k, canonverse au. dean’s a priest, cas is still his angel. i was HOOKED from the description alone like That’s Everything I Love in One Sentence. Cool!!!!!!!!!!!!

On the very first time that Castiel manifests in front of Father Dean Winchester, he gets as far as "Rejoice, for you are blessed-" before Dean shoots him with a salt-loaded shotgun.

not with a bang but a yelp by strange_estrangement, 1.4k, canonverse. team free will leave yelp reviews. this isn’t d/c actually it’s just a crack-ish fic but the formatting is cool and the references are SO funny and so well done

What happens when you visit dozens and dozens of motels every year? You leave Yelp reviews.

the courtship of combat by bendingsignpost, 18.2k, medieval a/b/o au. cas is politically coerced into fighting in a courtship melee for prince dean's hand, and he teams up with two unexpected allies to do it. I KNOW HOW THE ABO THING SOUNDS but i swear it's done well - it's by bendingsignpost so ofc he puts his own spin on the premise. im absurdly into it. PLUS jack is in it!!!!!!! it's technically an unfinished series but the first part is so good just on its own

When pressed upon to mate for a political alliance, Commander Castiel dares to refuse his king. As “I do not wish to mate at all” is clearly the wrong thing to say, Castiel takes the other path and lies. “You must know my affections lie elsewhere, my king.”

King Michael studies Castiel’s face long and hard. Then, with a nod, he snaps his fingers, pointing to Castiel. “The Winchester omega.”

“Yes,” Castiel says with no real recollection of who that is.

The ruse of an unavailable omega works well enough, right up until that omega is no longer unavailable. Then, with what seems to be his entire nation cheering him on toward victory, Castiel must enter the melee to win his mate. Backed by allies, training, and his own natural talents, the only question is how well he can contrive to fail.

four letter word for intercourse by bendingsignpost, 194.7k, au. dean calls a sex hotline. OH BOY solid characterization excellent plot/premise like bendingsignpost is so good at turning absurd premises into realistic, believable fiction. also sex hotline fic is usually a BIG turn-off bc of the power dynamics/one-sidedness of a relationship based on sex work but. BUT. bendingsignpost does it well! it’s not weird at ALL i started reading and was immediately reassured abt its intentions and its plot direction

As a grease monkey turned college freshman, Dean's constantly three seconds away from being stressed out of his mind. It hardly helps that he's finally figuring out his sexuality in his thirties.

What might help with that stress is a little phone number (and a big credit card bill). If he can't figure out how to be bisexual in person, he can at least give it a go over the phone, right?

(It's probably a bad idea, but he really can't help himself.)

the tunnel of love by xylodemon, 21.4k, post-canon. case fic! dean and cas have to kiss on a loveboat to solve a case >:)

"We might," Cas starts slowly, pausing like he's choosing his words. "We might have to kiss."

Dean just stares at him.

when you have a future. by firebog, 17.6k, post-s8. dean and sam and cas learning to be human post-apocalypse. reminds me of robotmango’s writing! it’s kind of eccentric and very very sweet and funny.

Sam closes Hell. Castiel closes Heaven. The heroes save the day. There's no Heaven or Hell waiting to cause the next big disaster. There's no more end of the world. There's only a squirmy feeling in his chest that feels a lot like freedom. So, now what?

(Things I promise you in this fic: dog poetry, rabbits, and fluff)

six inch heels by alitneroon, 2.3k, canonverse. dean does drag! excellent fucking character study. prose is fantastic

Dean does drag on a whim, and ends up in way over his head.

sharing is caring by gateskeeper, 2.5k, canonverse. five times dean and cas shared something and one time they didn’t. look. sometimes u just need some saccharine tropey fluff. it’s VERY well written

Sam knows that Dean and Cas have shared a lot together, but ever since Cas became human permanently, it seems like they've been sharing a lot more. 

Or: five times Dean and Cas shared something special and one time Dean refused to.

💖 empty spaces by schmerzerling, 60k, au. dean has to take care of his dying father, and takes up running to cope. that’s just the beginning. HEAVY trigger warnings for ED (specifically anorexia) and suicidal thoughts. there is a happy ending, but dean has to fight to make it there. god. okay. this is a dark fic. it’s also one of the most well-characterized fics i’ve ever read. dean’s spiral is excruciatingly accurate and written with the kind of wry compassion that comes from either extensive research or extensive experience. it’s also completely immersed in dean’s perspective - dean’s relationship w his dad, dean’s relationship w food scarcity, etc. it’s incredible. it’s kinda scary. it’s deeply sad. cas is explicitly autistic and it’s ALSO incredibly accurate and loving, and makes cas so true to his canon self. ugh. and i burst into TEARS at some of the accompanying art, which is so sparse and lonely and beautiful. 100/10 experience one of the best fics i’ve read this year

Dean is fine. The way he sees it, things are simple. He had a house and a family and food in his stomach, and now he doesn't. And yeah, that's a downer, but he's not going to let that stop him from being fine, because he's in control of the situation. He definitely doesn't need anyone to save him. And it's not like the weird guy with the nice butt from down the road is the knight-in-shining-armor type, anyway.

broken road by thegeminisage, 109.6k, 14x13 au. dean makes a wish and gets more than he bargained for. a lot of “john comes back” fics are kinda short on nuance, which this author has talked about a lot - and oh MAN does this fic deliver on nuance. john’s abuse is absolutely present, but his pov makes him a complex character instead of a flat caricature for dean to reject. and the way this fic resolves really makes it clear that the priority is dean’s emotional well-being over all else!!! this isn’t about dean taking the path fandom thinks he should take w his abuser (killing john, punching john in the face, etc), this is abt dean coming to terms w his abuse and finding his own emotionally satisfying way of resolving it. also dean and cas are in an established relationship and it’s very slow and sweet.

A 14.13 Lebanon rewrite. When Dean uses a wish-granting pearl to try and kill the archangel Michael before he can escape the cage in Dean's head, they instead wind up with a newly-resurrected John Winchester.

It's been more than a decade since John died, and a lot has changed: Mary is alive, Sam and Dean have what passes for a proper home in the Men of Letters Bunker, and they're living with angels. John doesn't know angels are real, he doesn't know about the fragile new relationship between Dean and Castiel, and most of all, he doesn't know that Dean said yes to Michael, or that Dean's plan to defeat Michael would send him to a fate worse than death.

Now Dean must contend with both his father asking questions he can't answer, and his loved ones learning about the darker truths of his childhood, all while constantly battling the archangel trapped inside him. But Dean coming to terms with his history may be the difference between this being the beginning of a journey—or the end. 

home is not a place by imogenbynight, 6.8k, post-s11. human cas struggles with belonging, and dean struggles with their relationship. this reads a lot like komodobits’ cuckoo and nest, but it’s its own sweet little thing. they watch movies!!! very cute 

In which Dean is the oblivious one for a change.

love: a retrospective by xylodemon, 40.7k, post-s12. dean tries to deal w cas’ absence after s12 and reflects on their relationship thru the years. this was written before s13 aired, so - no spoilers - but jack plays a different role than he ends up playing in canon. it’s kinda fun seeing ppl’s theories pre-s13 tbh. makes me VERY glad that they took jack in the direction they did in show. anyway this is THEE definitive “they’ve been fucking all along” fic

Pretending Cas is just his friend has been the only thing keeping Dean's head on straight for years. He never realized how much doing that depended on him making himself scarce in the morning ─ not until Cas came back and moved into the bunker.

✨💖 if it all fell to pieces tomorrow by spocklee, 37k, post-s15 fix-it. cas gets broken out of the empty - and he immediately makes a break for it. new fave fix-it!!!! the writing is so understated and so straightforward - SO in character for cas tbh - that every single emotional beat feels like a PUNCH. and there are so many amazing character moments it made my chest seize the fuck up!!!!! perfect characterization perfect relationship moments perfect cas/jack parenting moments. the yearning over the phone is OFF THE CHARTS and spocklee makes the most of that tension!!!! PLUS old canon characters get to make fun appearances!!!!! i cannot recommend this shit enough

After the Empty, Cas has to spend some time alone. Orpheus tries to convince Eurydice over the phone that it’s okay to turn around now.

✨ before and after breakfast by spocklee, 10.5k, post-canon. dean and sam and cas tackle a monster of the week case with unexpected consequences. perfect pov perfect relationship moments SUCH GOOD TENSION. again this writing style just lets the tension dial up to 1000% every word is meaningful and it makes my chest hurt!!! spocklee SHOULD have blown up during the spn renaissance and i STAND by that

The monster of the week is a ghost who hates meat, alcohol, and feeling yourself. Guess who it is during the commercials.

CLASSICS

isn't it cool how every person has diff fics they consider "classics?" anyway these are required fucking reading. if u've been around these will prob be old news.

💖 asunder by rageprufrock, 23k, au. dean and cas go to sam's wedding. i reread this once a year like a religious ritual.

Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:6)

💖 the girlfriend experience by rageprufrock, 15k, set during s5. dean teaches cas how to be human. mostly the sex part. literally the gold fucking standard of s4-5 era deancas fic and for deancas fic in general, personally

While it's not like Dean hasn't had a couple of truly regrettable hit-and-runs in his sexual history, this is probably the saddest fucking thing that has ever happened to him.

okay, cupid. by orange_crushed, 4.5k, au. dean tries to sign up for an ok cupid profile and has a revelation. as soon as i put this entry down i realized this entire fic rec was an exercise in futility, because if i could i'd literally just rec everything orange_crushed/robotmango has ever written. still one of THEE best authors in this fandom. go read all her fics. i’ll put the highlights here

"The dating thing?" Dean frowns. "Online dating is for weirdos. Robots. Dudes hanging out in their basements."

"You hang out in your basement."

"I have an air hockey table down there,” Dean says, icily.

💖 pwp: pie without plot by orange_crushed and majorenglishesquire, 82k, post-s8. sam and dean and cas quit hunting for a little bit to open a bakery. this is my comfort fic. i love it so so much.

he is in the kitchen with flour on his hands and an apron and there is flour on his forehead and cas leans across the counter and wipes it off with his thumb and dean says "thank you" and cas says "you’re welcome" very seriously and later dean makes apple turnovers and he only ruins them a little and sam realizes it’s not a real hunt like four days into it and he lets dean stay undercover for like a week and a half or longer maybe way longer because he is such a good everything

💖 la cucina by orange_crushed, 4k, post-s8. dean gets into cooking for a newly human cas. it's so gentle and loving and kind and makes me tear up every time. YES food is a comfort item and expression of love for dean. no i don't want to talk about it

Dean turns around and Castiel is picking through the jars, turning them over carefully to read the labels, totally engrossed. Dean watches him.

"Is there," Dean says, "uh, anything in there you like?" Castiel looks up at him and then back at the apples, sitting in a basket on the counter in their golden skins, ripe and pretty. Castiel smiles up at Dean.

"I don’t know yet," he says.

today, your barista verse by orange_crushed, 13.6k, coffeeshop au. a series of short sweet lovely fics where cas is a barista and dean is a smitten customer. literally the only coffeeshop au i respect

"Is that-"

"My number," says Dean, because he's a fucking champion, he's cool, he's collected, he's Captain Smooth of the USS Smoothtania, that's right. He is definitely not leaning against the counter for moral support. Cas doesn't looked seduced or impressed, though. He does not look like a dude who just met Captain Smooth and wants to ride the loveboat. He looks puzzled.

fata morgana. by orange_crushed, 6.6k, post-s9. dean is the king of hell. bela and cas team up to find him. bela pov. yeah you fucking heard that right BELA POV. BELA AND CAS!!!!!!!!!! makes me lose my mind i love everyone in this stupid desolate fucking hell wasteland.

The endless asphalt and broken road, the empty land and piles of human garbage, the unwanted ends of life, the cracked toys and broken screens and burning cars and gravel. Dean Winchester is the king of hell.

"Oh," says Bela.

That changes certain things.

💖 gran fury. by orange_crushed, 5k, pacific rim au. sam and cas pair up in a last ditch mission to save the world. permanently damaged me at age 15 and i've never recovered. major fucking angst warning.

They sit in silence and Castiel passes him the bottle. There’s not much left to say. Sam takes a gulp and it burns going down, like the cheap shit it is. He holds the bottle up against the light. He can see the Fury through it, distorted like a funhouse mirror. She’s a tomb but Sam loves her. Loves everything that’s left.

"To the end of the world," he says.

"To the end of the world," says Castiel.

💖 shut up (put your money where your mouth is) by kototyph, 24k, au. dean and cas get drunk married in vegas. dean renovates cas' house. this fic is SO MUCH BETTER than i remembered/expected and the entire series is fucking adorable go read it RIGHT now

Dean's done some pretty stupid things, but getting drunk-hitched in Vegas to a colleague he barely knows might just take the cake. His surprise husband, Castiel, is a little weird but likable despite that, and Dean figures they’ll go back to Boston, get a quiet annulment, and go their separate ways. Six weeks later, he’s still married to one of the strangest, most genuine and definitely most dangerously lov-- likable guys he's ever known. Dean doesn't know why or really even how it’s happening, but it’s getting harder and harder to remember that he has divorce papers to file.

not part of the plan by annie d (scaramouche), 338k, arranged marriage au. cas is slated to marry a noble from the winchester house. things spiral out of control. if you’re looking for an extensive well-developed political au, this is fucking it. i love reading about political machinations so this was FASCINATING to me. 

Castiel's spent most of his adult life keeping his head down and staying out of trouble. This is a deliberate choice on his part, because as a cousin of the King, he'd rather stay unimportant and forgotten. This changes abruptly when King Michael decides that he has a better use for Castiel: he is to be wed to a noble member of the neighboring Republic, as part of an agreement between their two nations.

Castiel knows he has to obey, but that doesn't mean he won't rebel in what small ways he can. Unexpectedly, his actions end up having far-reaching consequences.

💖 all things shining by askance and standbyme, 142k, au. sam and dean and cas go on a hunt that's not really a hunt, and against all odds good things happen. it's beautifully written and has scenes that literally make my heart leap out of my chest with joy and awe it's just WONDERFUL it's a wonderful fic. incredible mythology too omg i found that the authors actually created the myth the entire story is based on - like they don’t pull a random one from history, they made one up THEMSELVES. they even self-published it on amazon if ur curious

Something in the world is waking up.

It isn’t long before it’s brought to the attention of the Winchesters and Castiel: miracles are spreading across the country, the paranormal seems to be shrinking back on itself—and it all has something to do with the missing prayer book of a traveling preacher who died over a century ago.

Dean is convinced it’s all the lead-up to another Apocalypse; Sam and Castiel aren’t so sure. Regardless, it sends them out on a less-than-typical road-trip, following the Mississippi and remnants of a very old story that seems increasingly to call to them. And along the way the trio learn much more about themselves—and the consequences and origins of love—than they’d ever have anticipated.

💖 broadway musical by griftings, 12.4k, crack. romcom where cas is supposed to play matchmaker to dean and jo and well. you know. it actually made me cackle out loud when i read it again so you know it's still good. absolutely one of the funniest fics i’ve read

This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.

The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.

Or, the romantic comedy where Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle are destined to get married, Castiel is given the task of playing matchmaker and fails terribly, the entire Heavenly Host becomes a sitcom audience, God warns against male pregnancy, and Jimmy Novak is incredibly unimpressed with angels in general.

the five people you meet in heaven by chevrolangels, 22k, ambiguously canonverse. dean dies and goes to heaven and meets five people from his life. NOT a post-finale fic but still horrifically sad. i remember sobbing hysterically when i first read this so

Heaven is white.

Well. Isn’t that fucking stereotypical.

Dean isn’t really sure how he got here. Or even why he’s here. And hell, for all the times the Winchesters have died, he thinks he ought to know the drill by now. But what he doesn’t know is when most folks go, they find something different.

There’s a system God put in place. That when you’re gone (for good), there are a couple things you gotta do first. There are five people waiting for you.

They are the five people you meet in heaven.

any port in a storm by microcomets, 53k, post-s8. dean and cas go on a haunted cruise for a case. you know what happens next. also the art is by anobviousaside and it's gorgeous

The angels have fallen, leaving Castiel graceless and Dean with, well, more of other people’s problems. When a string of couples goes missing on the east coast, Dean and Cas decide to investigate—and find themselves trapped and hunted on a couples’ counseling cruise. Although battling monsters at sea is dangerous enough, sorting through emotional baggage proves to be far more deadly. (And, in which Cas embarks to find his missing grace and Dean is put out. Not necessarily in that order.)

a turn of the earth by microcomets, 95k, pre-canon au. cas is on the run from the empty and crash lands in dean's life. at one point he punches john in the face. a fucking beautifully written character study of pre-canon dean, honestly.

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.

Frigging fantastic.

(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)

unfinished duet by microcomets, 5.8k, canonverse. sam observes dean and cas throughout the years. i remember this breaking my heart back in 2013!

Sam watches Dean and Cas over the years and notices a few things. (Or, Dean and Cas unscripted.)

💖 ergative/absolutive by glassedplanets, 8k, college au. dean and cas are best friends who meet in an astronomy class. i'm never not thinking about this fic it's so sweet and the friends to lovers is so soft and believable

He really shouldn’t be thinking thoughts like this about his best friend who literally just broke up with his girlfriend, but he knows he’ll blame it on sleepiness in the morning. He always does.

a certain light by flightagain, 24k, au. cas works at the gas n sip. dean is a customer. this author’s writing style is so lonely and heavy but it’s very lovely

Castiel works at the Gas-n-Sip. There are half-price nachos and flickering lights, there are office-workers and werewolves stopping by for snacks. Dean is a frequent customer, and his office might be haunted.

the one thing you can’t lose by majorenglishesquire, 5k, ambiguously canonverse. dean can pull cas around and it’s adorable. character study-ish. very sweet.

You know what I like a lot? The thought that Dean can just tug Cas anywhere at any time and Cas, who can lift tons without effort, who can demolish things with the light of his grace, who has battled and gone to war, has defended and broken, will just let Dean do it.

brother lover by twentysomething, 4k, set during s4/s5. dean’s jealous of sam and cas’ budding relationship. this fic is so tropey but it does it well and it’s funny as fuck

However- and it doesn't happen a lot- they have to invoke 'I saw her first.’

his fucking kids by 8sword, 3k, canonverse au. dean and cas raise claire and emma together. yes, claire novak. yes, emma of 7x13 spice girls fame. this was the first kidfic i read for spn i think. obvs written before jack or claire actually came back into the picture but it was the TEMPLATE of kidfic for me for ages

Jesus, the school should just have a parking spot labeled, “Reserved for the Novak-Winchesters,” because Dean’s getting sick of having to cruise around the parking lot looking for a spot every time he gets a call from the principal about Emma.

💖 what has eight tentacles and isn’t allowed to eat pie? by annie d (scaramouche), 16k, post s8. dean gets turned into an octopus. another fic that was SO MUCH BETTER than i remembered i fucking love when that happens. it isn’t even about dean being an OCTOPUS like NO. NOT EVEN. it’s ACTUALLY about the bunker and building a home and a community and a family and about PHYSICAL COMFORT and you can actually feel the world expanding at the end of this fic like a gusty sigh of relief it’s SO WONDERFUL. kevin is in this fic. ellie is too and i had to look her up but THIS is her!!!! danay garcia u were too hot to stay on this show but i love you and miss u

Dean watched an anime porn about this once, but real life turns out to be way less interesting.

Or, the one where Dean gets turned into an octopus.

💖 a beginner’s guide to communing with the dead by suspiciousflashlight, 77k, canonverse au. dean is a cop who summons a powerful entity to help him solve a cold case. oh my god i can’t believe i didn’t put this on here i love this one so much. the writing bowls me over it’s so confident in its worldbuilding like you’re IMMEDIATELY plunged into dean’s pov (FLAWLESSLY executed throughout the fic btw) and you just learn about the world as you go!! and it’s such a fascinating world!!! i love the magic i love the typical bureaucratic red tape procedures i love normalizing the supernatural. i ESPECIALLY love monsters as normal people in a society. at one point there’s this exchange

“Monsters,” says Cas finally. “Beyond the Wall there are monsters.” “You mean, like, vampires and djinn and stuff?” Cas shakes his head. “Those aren’t monsters, those are just people.”

those lines have stayed with me for years. i think about them every time i rewatch an episode of spn.

Maybe it's the little girl whose disappearance turned into a murder, and whose murder turned into a cold case, and who has now apparently decided to move in with him. Maybe it's the unacceptable hole left in his life when his dumb best friend and partner in (the prevention of) crime decided to go and get himself killed. Maybe it's his brother, whose high-profile career and fantastic girlfriend and first-child-on-the-way are steadily leaving Dean in the dust. Pick one. Pick all of them. The why doesn't matter so much as the what, and the what is this: Dean is pretty sure he's going completely, certifiably insane. Sure, he hasn't started wearing all his clothes inside out, and he still showers on a regular basis (anyways, that's not crazy, just a little eccentric); but there's no getting around the fact that he just threw away his life, his career, and his reputation by dragging out his mom's old necromancy book and summoning a Class A Forbidden Entity to his attic. A cranky one, too. With horrendous bed-head.

dean’s list by almaasi, 3k, canonverse. dean makes a list. short and sweet. i read this so much in 2015 that it literally got engraved into my brain line by line and rereading it caused synapses to fire that havent felt anything in years

Dean writes out a list of men he would go gay for. Sam has a suggestion to make.

💖 the path of fireflies by museaway, 63.7k, post-s8. dean and cas open a charming bed and breakfast in vermont. no, literally. another CLASSIC. i think about the food in this fic all the time...........maple bacon baked french toast......the cinnamon rolls.....it literally sounds so good

After his humanity is restored, Dean wakes up in bed with Castiel, a wedding ring, and no memory of the past twelve years.

long nights in cold months by pyrebi, 2.3k, au. dean’s an insomniac and cas works at walmart. i forgot i had this fic ALSO basically memorized. holy shit. pineapple in the fruit aisle.....................anyway it’s short and sweet and the “plot” resolves in such a satisfying way

When you're an insomniac, you get used to the "what the hell are you doing up, man?" look. Dean just hopes the guy who's stocking the shelves will stop giving it to him long enough to help him find some damn pineapple.

incredibly single & ready to mingle by imogenbynight, 3.6k, au. dean and cas meet on facebook. short cute au!!!!!!

Sam uses Facebook like the social media junkie he is. He's befriended literally every person he's ever had a conversation with since he got an account, which means that approximately—Dean checks—eight hours ago, he shared this horrible photo with something in the vicinity of nine hundred people. The caption below the picture reads “incredibly single & ready to mingle ;)” and roughly half of them have liked it.

Dean has never been so embarrassed in his life.

💖 unknown quantities by xylodemon, 8.5k, post-s8. after a post-case tryst, dean has to figure out his and cas’ relationship. human cas fics hold a special place in my heart. funny AND good dean pov AND a misunderstanding that i actually think works!!!!!

No one ever tells Dean anything.

(or: Dean Winchester and the not-relationship crisis of 2014)