#but very specifically.
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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Last summer I was on a very expedited acid come up at a music festival and my entirely unaware mother thousands of miles away was at costco and texted me incredulous at how they already had halloween stuff out for sale in the summer but all I saw was a message preview of a giant 10 foot tall skeleton with glowing eyes and "can u believe it??"
#at this very specific particular moment no i cannot!!#i told her about it after and she was like ohh you know you WERE really quiet that day i wondered why you didnt text back#girl i was FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE ON THE ASTRAL PLANE#WITH A 10 FOOT SKELETON
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There’s that post that’s like ‘everyone should get into a tiny niche fandom at least once’ fully agree, that was really fun -- but I would like to add that everyone should get into a fandom where their opinions run counter to major fanon because it really teaches you about sticking to your guns and trusting your interpretation of the text without having to rely on peer validation
because WHAT are people talking about sometimes
#aka: genuinely sometimes I think I live in a parallel universe and simply watched/read different things#full disclosure it does make you feel like a killjoy sometimes#because often times these fanons will be presented in a silly jokey manner#'oh so silly isn't this character so funny this is just my silly little headcanon'#and it's like yes yes lol lol but ok look me in the eyes and tell me you know that this is#at best only one interpretation of many and at worst simply not supported by the text at all#please tell me you know that#or in one specific example such a ubiquitous joke that is literally a significant theme of the work and i feel like SUCH a killjoy#being like 'ok yes very funny.....you know that was a major theme right?? tell me you know that'
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"I want to eat you" is their love language and you can't change my mind
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#hazbin alastor#hazbin rosie#radiorose#alastor#my art#autodesk sketchbook#they are so freaky they must have so many fucked up conversations like that I just know it#it's their weird way of “flirting” yk what I mean#I headcanon that Alastor HATES burgers and fast food in general ik it's very specific#my artstyle is so inconsistent ahah I'm experimenting don't mind me#hazbin comic
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[mob killing noises] BAM!!!!1111!!
#goodtimeswithscar#jimmy solidarity#solidaritygaming#ldshadowlady#wild life smp#wild life spoilers#life series spoilers#traffic smp#trafficblr#my art#HI THIS TOOK TOO LONG KJASDKLAJWKJAWEAWHAH#i tried to go for this very specific pop graphic style and disintegrated in the process#also the composition took three tries#very logicial thing to do 2 days before a midterm ik#HSJKDAEPFELELP HOPE U GUYS LIKE IT :D#i love the bamboys winners pov. bamboys i believe you in you together you are stronger <- incredibly delusional#listen it would be *REALLY* FUNNY#such a great team tho fr WOOOOOOO
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hey! you shouldnt make jokes calling cis people eggs, especially when they are real living breathing human beings with intelligent thought and critical thinking. if you do, you're weird and i think you should consider the effect your words more often, because as someone who was a very public facing cis person who had a lot of Egg jokes made about me before transitioning, it still makes me fucking sick to think about. it fucked me up so bad that i refused to transition until i quit my job and wasnt under the eyes of people making bets on my psychology. how dare you fucking speak down to me regarding my own identity. how dare you fucking claim to know me better than i know myself.
it is not the privilege of trans people to have their stated gender identity believed, nor is it a sin of cis people to acknowledge their option to transition and still remain cis. make egg jokes about fictional characters, fine. but accusing a stranger of not being the gender they claim to be is not something you get to reclaim when you're trans.
#text#random thought#not actually a random thought this is actually about something very specific LOL
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What is it about laying on the floor when you're overwhelmed that makes everything feel so much better?
#like its better than laying on a bed when it comes to that very specific state of absolutely out of your gourd overwhelmed#it takes serious self control for me some days to just not lay on the floor if things are too much#floor time is best time
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please help me- i used to be pretty smart but i’m having so much trouble grasping the concept of diegetic vs non-diegetic bdsm!
gfkjldghfd okay first of all I'm sorry for the confusion, if you're not finding anything on the phrase it's because I made it up and absolutely nobody but me ever uses it, but I haven't found a better way to express what I'm trying to say so I keep using it. but now you've given me an excuse to ramble on about some shit that is only relevant to me and my deeply inefficient way of talking and by god I'm going to take it.
SO. the way diegetic and non-diegetic are normally used is to talk about music and sound design in movies/tv shows. in case you aren't familiar with that concept, here's a rundown:
diegetic sound is sound that happens within the world of the movie/show and can be acknowledged by the characters, like a song playing on the stereo during a driving scene, or sung on stage in Phantom of the Opera. it's also most other sounds that happen in a movie, like the sounds of traffic in a city scene, or a thunderclap, or a marching band passing by. or one of the three stock horse sounds they use in every movie with a horse in it even though horses don't really vocalize much in real life, but that's beside the point, the horse is supposed to be actually making that noise within the movie's world and the characters can hear it whinnying.
non-diegetic sound is any sound that doesn't exist in the world of the movie/show and can't be perceived by the characters. this includes things like laugh tracks and most soundtrack music. when Duel of Fates plays in Star Wars during the lightsaber fight for dramatic effect, that's non-diegetic. it exists to the audience, but the characters don't know their fight is being backed by sick ass music and, sadly, can't hear it.
the lines can get blurry between the two, you've probably seen the film trope where the clearly non-diegetic music in the title sequence fades out to the same music, now diegetic and playing from the character's car stereo. and then there are things like Phantom of the Opera as mentioned above, where the soundtrack is also part of the plot, but Phantom of the Opera does also have segments of non-diegetic music: the Phantom probably does not have an entire orchestra and some guy with an electric guitar hiding down in his sewer just waiting for someone to break into song, but both of those show up in the songs they sing down there.
now, on to how I apply this to bdsm in fiction.
if I'm referring to diegetic bdsm what I mean is that the bdsm is acknowledged for what it is in-world. the characters themselves are roleplaying whatever scenarios their scenes involve and are operating with knowledge of real life rules/safety practices. if there's cnc depicted, it will be apparent at some point, usually right away, that both characters actually are fully consenting and it's all just a planned scene, and you'll often see on-screen negotiation and aftercare, and elements of the story may involve the kink community wherever the characters are. Love and Leashes is a great example of this, 50 Shades and Bonding are terrible examples of this, but they all feature characters that know they're doing bdsm and are intentional about it.
if I'm talking about non-diegetic bdsm, I'm referring to a story that portrays certain kinks without the direct acknowledgement that the characters are doing bdsm. this would be something like Captive Prince, or Phantom of the Opera again, or the vast majority of bodice ripper type stories where an innocent woman is kidnapped by a pirate king or something and totally doesn't want to be ravished but then it turns out he's so cool and sexy and good at ravishing that she decides she's into it and becomes his pirate consort or whatever it is that happens at the end of those books. the characters don't know they're playing out a cnc or D/s fantasy, and in-universe it's often straight up noncon or dubcon rather than cnc at all. the thing about entirely non-diegetic bdsm is that it's almost always Problematic™ in some way if you're not willing to meet the story where it's at, but as long as you're not judging it by the standards of diegetic bdsm, it's just providing the reader the same thing that a partner in a scene would: the illusion of whatever risk or taboo floats your boat, sometimes to extremes that can't be replicated in real life due to safety, practicality, physics, the law, vampires not being real, etc. it's consensual by default because it's already pretend; the characters are vehicles for the story and not actually people who can be hurt, and the reader chose to pick up the book and is aware that nothing in it is real, so it's all good.
this difference is where people tend to get hung up in the discourse, from what I've observed. which is why I started using this phrasing, because I think it's very crucial to be able to differentiate which one you're talking about if you try to have a conversation with someone about the portrayal of bdsm in media. it would also, frankly, be useful for tagging, because sometimes when you're in the mood for non-diegetic bodice ripper shit you'd call the police over in real life, it can get really annoying to read paragraphs of negotiation and check-ins that break the illusion of the scene and so on, and the opposite can be jarring too.
it's very possible to blur these together the same way Phantom of the Opera blurs its diegetic and non-diegetic music as well. this leaves you even more open to being misunderstood by people reading in bad faith, but it can also be really fun to play with. @not-poignant writes fantastic fanfic, novels, and original serials on ao3 that pull this off really well, if you're okay with some dark shit in your fiction I would highly recommend their work. some of it does get really fucking dark in places though, just like. be advised. read the tags and all that.
but yeah, spontaneous writer plug aside, that's what I mean.
#I found their original stuff while I was researching various waterhorses and their folklore for no reason#because one of the characters in their original work happens to be an each uisge#and then it turned out it ALSO included a lot of figures from welsh folklore in general#so yknow if you happen to have my incredibly specific hyperfixations you'll love it but even if you don't it's great#I didn't mean to bring up phantom of the opera so much it just happens to be very relevant to a lot of my talking points#I haven't actually seen it in years
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sometimes all you need is one passionate person who goes berserk for your work to keep you creating
#I have 1 person like that with my jn and 1 person like that with my joshaz and their aggressive acclaim means I’m writing more 😂#I mean there’s a few more of y’all too and I have said before I enjoy niche but big passion#I’d rather share in those with the handful of genuine enjoyers of Very Specific ships and dynamics#it’s what makes fandom so memorable and fun for me#anyway#rebloggable
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don bluth films occupy a weird space because he's both inarguably an auteur who directs very strange, earnest, often "ugly" films but also a guy who near exclusively made movies for 8 year olds in the home video era. so basically everything he's ever done is a grimy, dreamy rumination on death and spirituality and has a direct to video sequel called something like secret of nimh 2: mrs. brisby's holiday adventure
#this happens to a lot of family films obviously#but i can't really think of another director that has a familiar divide between a very stylistic and thematically specific body of work#and direct to video kids movie-quality sequels#the sequels to musker and clements films don't really have the same severe difference in tone to the originals#what happened to neverending story didn't happen to every wolfgang peterson movie#etc
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Michael can survive (almost) anything in FNAF
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#michael afton#helpy#fnaf sister location#fnaf pizzaria simulator#Michael has a very set number of skills#he’s actually almost indestructible#UNLESS it gets hot#This is so funny to me#LIKE I’ll be honest I wouldn’t last in the heat as well especially in small stuff rooms#but specifically funny to Michael#cause he’s gone through so much worse in comparison#dude lost all his organs and bones and he got back up quicker than he does to heat#DUDE lives in Utah and can’t handle a summers day 💀#this is why all his shirts didn’t have sleeves as a kid#dude was dying out there#this is how you can tell he’s British#he longs for a rainy day
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you know, I've been thinking about it, and there is actually one single scenario in which I would be okay with not getting a big ol' "Silver Vanrouge" out of Lilia.
(just kidding, I still need some "call me Silver, Mr. Vanrouge is my father" in my life, please don't let me down on this one Twst)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#(gonna do the general episode 7 tags just in case but...weirdly i don't think this is specifically spoilery for once?)#why not though. why not both of 'em.#why not all of 'em. sebek can hyphenate.#lilia gazing wistfully up at the sky: it's what meleanor would have wanted#ghost meleanor with a bucket of popcorn watching the senate absolutely implode in impotent rage: hell yeah#i'm currently about 80/20 on whether or not i think we'll actually get silver vanrouge in canon#but man do i ever want it#if we all hold hands and believe very hard maybe we can manifest this by the time we finally get back to diasomnia#WE CAN DO IT 🤝🤝🤝
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Zepotha will never be Goncharov because when it comes down to it, tumblr culture is collaborative, while tiktok culture is merely iterative, and those are not the same thing.
#also because tumblr has a very specific way that it interacts with the media it loves#like make no mistake; when we made Goncharov we were a little bit making fun of ourselves#and the way we project high emotion and significance onto even the smallest details#(also the way we want everything to be gay)#tiktok isn’t doing that. they think the joke is the fake movie itself. but the fake movie isn't really the point.#the point is the fake FANDOM#goncharov
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Having a mutual online at the same time as you is like playing a game of pong but you're just reblogging each other's shit
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For a full experience please read Starscreams dialogue in a similar cadence as Mater in that one meme about wanting to fuck McQueen
#this is a reference to a very specific scene in the movie#start of a healthy and beautiful relationship I'm sure#tf one#transformers one#maccadam#starscream#megatron#transformers#tf one spoilers#transformers one spoilers
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