#but until then i'll do it myself 😅 or let someone else do it if anyone would like to take over!

[marshmallowgoop]

It seems you're mixing the dub audio with remastered footage which I was planning on doing but are you actually gonna upload full episodes anywhere?

I don't share much information about the project on Tumblr, but I talk about it more on Discord!

My workbench in the DCMK Fanworks Server (join link here) has the most comprehensive and up-to-date info, but I also post updates in the Detective Conan EN Community (join link here). As of right now, I've mixed Episodes 1-71, 76-78, and 118.

That said: I would be very happy if anyone else would like to take over! I am very slow 😅

[shepherds-of-haven]

Okay I saw this asked on another blog and it was hilarious so I have to ask here : what do you think inner circle’s Beige Flags are? ( weird/quirky or questionable things they do that give you pause but overall have no real effect on the relationship)

Also hope you are feeling better!! 🩵🩵

Ooh, this is a fun one haha! (And I'm feeling a bit better, thank you! I still haven't fully recovered, but getting there slowly but surely! 🥲) Anyway, let me think...

Blade: rather than accompany you into shops (especially small ones), he assumes you want to be left alone to do your shopping in peace (and also typically finds shopping boring) and will instead just stand outside the door, looming like a really intimidating security guard or bouncer. (He is assessing street security, guarding the only door, and positioning himself within shouting distance in case there's some kind of threat.) This often inadvertently drives away business, so sometimes he'll just wait at the end of the street instead, staring out at the crowd like a member of your own personal secret service

Trouble: sometimes he eats too fast, or more accurately talks too fast while eating, leading to frequent inhalation down the wrong pipe and people having to thump him on the back while he coughs. Sometimes he will power through the coughing by sheer force of will and will just... forcefully swallow through it. He refuses to slow down. Life's too short to try to avoid death by choking

Tallys: doesn't make a ton of affirming noises to let you know that she's listening. A lot of people go "uh-huh" or "wow" or "right" or whatever when you're in the midst of telling a long-winded story. She just stares at you patiently in silence until she's sure you're fully done. This is polite in Elven culture, and she is completely listening, but it can unnerve people who feel pressured by silence lol

Shery: she still has to look at her hands to tell left from right. Like sometimes she has to make her left hand form the L to remember 😅 She also finds it difficult to do math in her head and either has to sketch it out in the air or write it down!

Riel: always leaves a bite or two of food left on his plate; rarely completely cleans his plate. Same with drinks! So many teacups that always have a few sips left at the bottom. Why didn't you just drain it, man? It's like he does it on purpose!

Chase: always takes the most meandering, inefficient way to get to a place. like if the walk from A to B is a straight line down one avenue, he always seems to take the most roundabout, random path. Here, I'll draw you a map:

Red: he is very bad at matching the pace of his walking with others; with those long legs, he walks at a naturally and totally subconscious fast pace! He's mindful about it when on a date or actively courting someone, but when he's focused on something else, excited, traveling, or out and about with friends, he has to frequently be asked to shorten the length of his strides so others can keep up lol

Ayla: I've mentioned this one for her before, but she's very bad about sharing her food. She hates when you snatch a fry off her plate without asking, and even if you do ask, she can be fairly begrudging about it if she perceives food is plentiful (like "why can't you get your own, the line is right there?") In work circumstances, like sharing group rations, she's totally fine, but in restaurants or in the refectory, she's annoyed by it, like "I loaded this plate for myself and planned on eating all of it... myself 😒 If you wanted to share something, you should have said so earlier!"

Briony: she's constantly whipping people in the face with her ponytail. She tends to turn her head really fast or spin around in conversation and whoever's standing near her ends up with a mouthful of hair. She hasn't learned to not smack people in the eye with her hair yet despite several remonstrations

Lavinet: frankly shocked, upset, and scandalized whenever there isn't a little something sweet at the end of a meal. it doesn't have to be a full-on dessert--even a single chocolate served on a plate would do, and is often preferred! but when there's nothing?? nary a profiterole or cream puff or a little sweet treat for the lady in sight?? something is off!! her palette isn't satisfied!!

Halek: he always wakes up in the morning so loudly. unfold from the bed -> crack his back, neck, shoulders with the most ungodly series of pops -> loud groan. It sounds like an old accordion getting stretched out

[justagalwhowrites]

i’m interested to see how joel would react to doc getting killed!! or bitten…. i love the angst tbh! 😅 maybe during that awkward time period where they weren’t really talking but still hooking up.. they still loved eachother so much couldn’t say it because they “hated” eachother 😮

OMG Hi Bestie! 

OK so because I'm a masochist (who shares in this fun hobby of tormenting myself with images of pain with someone who shall remain nameless) I've thought about this a lot. Shared below, with permission, is some of the noodling I've done on this topic with the aforementioned anonymous person who likes to give me INCREDIBLY ANGSTY AND DEPRESSING THOUGHT EXERCISES I SWEAR THIS IS A TWO WAY STREET Y'ALL. Please note that none of this is in story format and Doc is she instead of you because that's how I think about the fic in abstract terms? I guess? I don't know lol it's a mess in my head.

ANYWAY 

Putting this below the cut because it's probably a step beyond angst. I cannot stress enough that this is like... super depressing and also COMPLETELY RAW AND UNEDITED, all I did was pull out comments/prompts from the other person out of respect for them. So please limit your judgement as much as possible this stuff is real bad lol 

Below is Joel if she got bit on the Harvard run.

how terrified he was when he thought she might be bitten, how the first place his mind went was "I can kill her and I'll only need to be around for a few seconds after she's gone"If she got bit and he needed to kill her, he'd try so hard to keep it together for her. She'd be low key panicking and be like "Please don't let me turn into one of those things, please just kill me, please" and he'd just brush her hair back and hold her face in his hand all gentle and be like "I won't baby, not gonna let you go through that, OK? I've got you, it's OK. It'll be real quick, won't feel a thing and I'll be right behind you, OK? I'm right behind you, it's OK" and he'd hold her when he did it so she didn't feel alone and he'd keep holding her when he did it to himself, too

If Doc died in the tub the night that Joel left her in the QZ 

Joel is trying to avoid herTommy goes to the clinic that day and she's not there, which he expects because she's not supposed to be there on Sundays, but hears someone say her name and how they aren't sure how they're going to cover everything without her and there's a "...I still really miss her" at the end and he's like "wtf' and so he asks until he finds someone who will actually talk to him and he's like "no, we're old friends, I just haven't seen her in a few weeks, what happened?" and Marta just kinda looks at him like "how can you not know this" and says "She died. They weren't really sure how, if she did it on purpose or if she passed out but she drowned in her bathtub" and Tommy is, of course, reeling because he loved her, too. But he's also like "Oh fuck I have to tell Joel" and he's kind of in a daze and just walks around the QZ for a few hours and he gets home and Joel is just like "the fuck is your problem" and he's like "Joel... brother, you... I need you to sit down, OK? Need you to just... stay calm for me, OK?" and he says her name and then kinda stops and Joel gets this bad feeling and is like "what" and Tommy is quiet and he's like "what, Tommy. What is it. She fuck up something else, what'd she do, what's going on" and he's just like "She's dead, Joel." and Joel is silent for a minute and then asks what happened and how and Tommy really doesn't want to tell Joel what they told him and so Joel just gets up and Tommy tries to stop him and he's like "Don't fucking touch me" and he goes to Andrew's and he pounds on the door until Andrew answers and Andrew looks like hell, he's lost weight and he looks like he's hardly slept and he looks kind of dead in the eyes until he sees Joel and then he just looks like he wants to just set him on fire and he's like "The fuck are you doing here"

and Joel is like "what happened, you have to know what happened, please, fuck, please tell me what happened to her" and Andrew shoves him and just yells "You! You happened, you fucking happened! She died that night you fucking asshole, she lived for you and she fucking died for you, too. I hope you're fucking happy" and Joel is just practically frozen there and just lets Andrew wail on him for a minute before he looks at him and goes "you must fuckin hate me, right?" "Oh I more than hate you you fucking..." "Good. Kill me. Don't... don't care how just... please, fuck just..." and Andrew just kind of laughs at him darkly and says "No, no I'm not doing you any fucking favors, Miller. I have to live with the fact that I left her alone that night. You get to live with the fact that her blood's on your hands." Jess pulls Andrew back inside and Joel just trudges home but Tommy is kind of waiting for him, he's already stashed all the guns and the knives and he got Tess because he knows what Joel is like when he loses someone like thatand Joel only asked Andrew to do it because he couldn't risk flinching again, he had to do it right this time and he goes for where he keeps his gun as soon as he's in the door and it's gone and Tommy is just crying and he's like "Joel, you can't, I'm sorry..." and he's like "Just give me the fuckin' gun, Tommy! I can't do this, not again, I can't, I can't" and he just drops to his knees and Tommy holds onto him Tommy and Tess take turns, he's literally never alone for months. Eventually they think he can be trusted on his own and he's OK for a while but I think it wouldn't take all that long before he's gone, too it wouldn't be as obvious as a gun, it'd be him making a stupid mistake and getting bit or shot or an accident on a job in the qzand all the time in between he'd be such a shell of himself, Tess and Tommy always sharing a look when it's especially bad like "this has to get better at some point, right?"and when it eventually happens, neither Tess or Tommy are ever sure if it's really an accident or not. Joel wasn't really sure either, he just knew that the last thing he thought of was that last morning before Doc flew back to New York where he got her pregnant in the water and her and Sarah made French toast

SO YEAH that's just the most depressing shit in the world lol 

LOVE YOU!!

[epickiya722]

I do not know if it was you, or another blogger that made a character analysis of Gojo that made me like the character and discover more about him through the manga.

While I never read the manga before or watched the anime, I had been exposed to it by my friends and some BNHA bloggers. Back then, I found Gojo to be overhyped (discount Kakashi) while liking the animation(?) style, bit still no interest.

BNHA and its Endeavour Redemption arc in the doing was tiring me to the point that I stopped reading it and manga altogether. For mayne six months or so, until now, at least. I randomly found your blog last week , and it got me a new hyper fixation 😃. You got me to start reading JJK (Megan cos playing also helps).

I bought Number 0 and Number 1 of the mangas. Only to remember midway in Number 0 that Walmart Kakashi will be snapped in two like a Kit Kat🥲. I saw that leak in one of the BNHA blogs, and I didn't mind it back then since I wasn't in the fandom, but Lord, now it sucks.

Anyways, all this long rant to say that I like reading your posts.

Gojo, rest in pain, I guess?

Probably was someone else, I don't write much analysis posts about Gojo. I think once or twice I did, I can't recall. Probably reblogged one though you saw!

I don't know, they're really just two different characters to me. Also... I was never really an active reader or watcher of Naruto like that (just very familiar) so when I first saw Gojo, Kakashi didn't register to me at all.

Like, I did not get similar vibes at all. And it actually annoys me that people will be like "He copied Kakashi's flow"! Kakashi ain't the only white haired, face covering character out there with magical eyes, y'all stop. 😆

Even funnier when, by this point, Gojo has probably been unmasked more than he has been wearing something on his face and switches up what he puts on his face. Kakashi been wearing the same mask for...? Also, didn't it take years for Kakashi's whole face to be shown or something? Took like seven episodes for Gojo to show that face.

**

I always been a fan of Megan's music and then when I found out she was into anime I was like "YYYYYEEEEEAAAAH". She cosplayed as Miruko one Halloween and it made my year. I am a former believer that Miruko would vibe to her music.

Just seeing other Black women being unapologetic fans of anime (or anything) does wonders for me and I hate it when people act as if it's such a foreign idea to understand. Honey, we can have interests, too, like everyone else. It's normal.

**

I always try to be careful about spoilers for anything I'm into. Like, I can talk about a chapter that happened two years ago, but I'll still mark as a spoiler because I know some people don't read Mangas or even if they do haven't caught up to that specific part.

That actually what set me off when Usher cosplayed as Gojo because he literally put "rest in peace, Gojo" or something along those lines and the amount of people who weren't even aware of 236... like bro, come on.

I knew it just had to be a marketing tactic because I know damn well Usher ain't seen JJK a day in his life and how convenient it is he comes out with that cosplay around the time when "Daddy's Home" becomes a fairly popular song used in Gojo's edits. I can't go watching one video on YouTube without hearing that song play when Gojo pops up. And even if he has... WHY WOULD YOU TAG IT LIKE THAT?!

Oh, but Megan definitely doesn't know any of the characters she be cosplaying, alright... okay... 🙄

I'm just going off on a whole tangent here, I apologize for that. I've been sick for like three days and just woke up from a nap. 😅

**

Also, thank you! Glad you enjoy my posts!! Anytime anyone says they like reading my posts, I still get shocked. They're really are just random thoughts I been having and really I'm still learning grasping the characters and story myself. And this is just for any. I don't even for them to get read, let alone for anyone to actually agree with me. I guess because, at the end of the day, I really just needed to throw a thought out there before I lose it or keep rethinking about it over and over.

[destinyc1020]

I am posting a snippet of an interview that Zendaya recently did. I would like your insight on her answer because for me I found it a bit alarming that she is still doesn't know what makes her happy and how to live life on her own terms especially when you compare her answer to Florence.

Interviewer: And for both of you being in this industry people like to put you in a box so I wanted to know how do you make sure that you are living life on your own terms instead of living for the wants and desires that others have for you

Zendaya: I think for me I'm still figuring that out and I think we are always forever figuring that out. I think again feeling like I came into an industry quite young, part of it is feeling like, did I have a choice, is this really for me, but this is all I know and it is alI I ever known how to do. So I think for me it is learning what does make me happy ' is it all about making everyone else happy and what does makes me happy' and I think has I am growing up becoming a woman more and more I'm still trying to figure out and still trying to harness and understand about myself and hopefully I'll figure it out and maybe I won't, I don't know. Everyone at any point in your life you can have those realization and understandings about yourself I call them butterfly moments because that is what it is like to be a human

https://youtu.be/Iicd0I85AoU?si=kUCruK2BBR5uG_Km

Starts at 4:12

Girl... Let me tell you, I LOVED this interview!

The interviewer's fingernails were kind of scaring me a little bit lol😅, but this was SUCH a good interview! I love it when interviewers can ask really interesting questions that don't usually get asked, and I loved how deep and insightful both Z and Florence's answers to her questions. It also gave a little insight into how this industry is.

I keep telling y'all that the Hollywood industry is very cutthroat! Someone once said that "actors are some of the most insecure people ever..." and I can see why that would be the case! This industry makes you think that you are easily replaceable, you get told "NO" very often, you're sometimes brutally told the truth about yourself, and you are forced to grow up quickly in this industry. 😔

RE: Your Question...

I think Z was just answering the question honestly? Keep in mind, Z started acting a lot earlier than Florence did (at 17). When you've been acting since you were a kid (like Zendaya has), acting is all you KNOW.

So, I think for Z, what she was saying was that she's been doing this for so long at such a young age that sometimes she can feel like, "is this really what makes me happy? Was this really my choice?"

Obviously, acting is something she has LOVED to do, because Claire and Kazembe always told Zendaya that if she ever wanted to STOP acting, then they would drop everything and move back to Oakland and not even think anything of it.

But as a woman, you're always growing, evolving, etc...especially in your 20's. So, what you wanted at 21 might be totally different from what you want at 28. Ykwim?

To me, Z sounded like she was saying that she's still kind of figuring out what makes HER happy...vs trying to make OTHER people (ie. her team, her directors, her fans, etc) happy. She also struggles with realizing that acting is basically all she's ever known that she can do! So, she probably wants to stick to doing what she knows how to do. 🤷🏾‍♀️

I felt her answer was a very HONEST, insightful, and self-aware one. She wasn't trying to pretend like she's got it all figured out at age 27. She was being honest! I loved that. 😊 Maybe in the past she felt like she had to have all the answers, but now she's learning to "stop and smell the roses", and realizes that you don't have to have your whole life all figured out at 27.

Some people don't find their life's passion until their 40's. As humans, we are ALWAYS constantly learning, growing, and evolving imo.

[in-stitchesx]

idk if you'll see this, if you'll get flooded by shit like this, or insert whatever else reason that may potentially invalidate what I'm about to say;

I have been following this blog for a long time and have seen your art (and yourself) change quite a bit over the duration I've been on this hellsite and I wanted to drop my 2 cents in the ring-

You don't owe us shit, you don't owe us art or posts or even an EXPLANATION as to why you feel down or bad or not yourself. I'm in the same boat, pal, I have a shit time explaining myself to anyone and it's so frustrating to feel this way and have no way of properly explaining it to anyone. You feel trapped within yourself and trapped with your emotions.

Sorry for all the profanity and I'm sorry if this comes off as aggressive and unwanted or even incorrect in my assumptions! But I just wanted to let you know that we, as the little back-pocket community you've created, care about you more than just as someone who feeds us delicious art from time to time. You don't owe US shit, you owe YOURSELF healing, love, and care. Ya can't pour water from an empty glass. So you do whatever you can to get yourself back on your feet ok? Whether it be days, weeks, hell- months!

sorry for the thesis lol

Wish you luck on your journey to getting better, and we'll see ya on the other side 🧡

Almost had a heart attack in the first part 🫶 /nm

THANK YOU!!!! just wanted to get that one out of the way. I'm not always the best with words!! But this does mean a lot to me. I'm very glad that you had the opportunity to send me this, and even if it's probably been a while since you sent it (notifs off ... Hehe 😅) I am feeling a lot better reading it. You're very kind, and so are a lot of the people who follow me on here

Wybie is fine!! I'm uhh ... Idk imagine I'm on this elaborate vacation where I get to go identify bugs (ignoring how that would be a dream-)

Still no clue when I'll be back but have this positivity on your feed until I crawl back into the Tumblr cave 🤍🤍 drink some water I know you haven't (I'm talking to you)

[stoopid-turtle]

hello... 😅 uhm, first of all, i truly am sorry in advance for being awkward 😭 but for once i decided not to let my awkwardness keep me from sharing (what i think/hope are) positive thoughts with a stranger on the internet, so here i am.

i'm not around much and legit only made this acc bc like you i'm a late bloomer here and needed as many outlets for my yizhan/wangxian obsession as i could get my greedy hands on, in the big year of 2023... sigh. anyway, as an avid lover of meta/analysis posts since my early fandom days began around 15 (oof 🥲) years ago, finding your acc was such a lovely surprise. i agree with your views a LOT, and really appreciate how eloquent and well-written your posts are! even more so bc there's a lot i still don't know and most of the time the source material is very hard to reach and/or understand due to the language barrier, so having other turtles to rely on to access those, even if filtered by their own biases/opinions, is wonderful. besides, such input coming from a new fan is also comforting and imo refreshing, juxtaposed with that of older fans... it keeps the fandom alive and all that jazz. it's also very brave given how ruthless some folks can be on the internet, and on this corner in particular 😮‍💨 it just felt like reading my own thoughts written by someone else sometimes. i gasped and nodded at your posts soooo many times djskdjdj thank you for that!

(btw you followed me back the other day and i legit fangirled irl bc ??? whatttttt 😅 i still think it was an accident but okay omg djskdjdj AHEM. sorry)

then today i logged in and read your recent posts feeling squeamish about sharing more thoughts and as much as i 100% relate to you saying that kind of attention makes you anxious, i just... idk, i had to let you know i enjoy everything you post, even though adult life has kept me from being able to read it all so far. i understand you stepping back and i respect that decision, i'm not by any means asking you to go against what you know is best for you. at the same time, i can't help but hope you'll still show up every now and then bc your posts will be missed 🥲 i guess the whole motivation behind this is that it just made me sad to think your valuable insights will be something i'm yet again late to, if that makes sense?

djskdjdj again, i'm so sorry for being awkward and weird and dropping all of this on your inbox unprovoked. you don't have to reply (or read this AT ALL omg 😭😭), in fact i'm so embarrassed by this that you'd probably have to reach me through inquiry lmaooo 💀 anyway, have a great life, thank you so much for the great job, bjyxszd etc ❤️💚💛

Oh, don't be anxious! I'm really not a big deal.

Thank you for dropping into my inbox! I love hearing from other turtles, especially relative newbies, like myself! One of my fav parts of coming out of lurking mode is getting to talk to other people. I kinda follow back anybody who follows me, cause it seems polite? I don't know tumblr etiquette. I just follow the tags when I get the chance.

I appreciate the encouragement! I try to avoid dramatics, so I'm sorry for the upset last week. The situation is largely resolved, and I am feeling more okay. I kinda backed off because I wasn't sure of my footing here in fandom as compared to others, especially as I do think I have some takes that fall outside fandom consensus. Again, I don't mean to rock any boats and I'm not invested in convincing anybody that they should have the same opinions as I do. Hearing from turtles who do want me to continue posting gave me some more confidence there.

So, yeah, I expect I'll post some more as I have time. I'd like to post more on dd (cause he's my fav). I'd also like to try to figure out gg cause that dude is so confusing to me. I do have RL stuff going on, and I don't have the time to be super-active outside of occasional posts. But I'd like keep posting stuff. At least until I get all my Yizhan thoughts out.

[devilishmango]

Kenneski [DEVLOG 5/5/2024]

Hey guys!

This isn't an update to Kenneski, but I just wanted to bring you guys a devlog so you know how things are going and what to expect. ☺️

I'm about half-way through chapter 2, which is exciting. I'm not entirely sure where the chapter is going to end up, because I only have a basic outline of how I want the entire story to go. [Yes, I know, I'm horribly disorganized 😅] So for now, I'm just kind of going with the flow, and waiting for that pivotal, important part to pop up and stuff. The good part about that, though, is that I'm not afraid to go off on different paths and stuff for you to take. I think that'll definitely be fun to play through the story multiple times to see all that you can find out in each one.

Anyway! Down to more technical stuff- I rewrote the beginning of chapter 1, and added a bunch of new coding and whatnot. So, when the time comes to play chapter 2, you will need to re-play the entire thing. But, you will definitely want to, because I've improved a lot of different parts in the first chapter!

Relationship and character-wise, you get to learn A LOT more about each RO, because you get to spend some quality time with each of them. I'm already so excited to get to the romantic parts, but I have to keep restraining myself and let the relationships develop naturally. This can't be a PWP 😂 [I mean, if you guys are interested in some PWP side-stories, I can definitely oblige you... 👀] You also get to learn a little more about MC, one thing being kind of a major spoiler so I can't say anything about it for now. You'll just have to wait to find out about it when I upload the demo!

SO! Speaking of uploading the demo: I'm hoping to have chapter 2 finished by the beginning of June... But it may reach towards the middle of June. It all depends on how much writing I can get done THIS month. 🥲

Anyway, that's all I have for now! I'll hopefully get you the update next month. See you guys then!

CURRENT WORD COUNT: 30,635 45,440 [+14,805]

Also, as promised, there's a little sneak peak under the cut!

With a quick glance back at the door, I make sure no one is watching before I quickly pick up the little dagger and hold it in my good hand, feeling the weight and cold metal against my palm. Then, I realize that I have no idea how I’m going to keep this weapon hidden away in my sleeve without it falling out… That is, until I see a few pieces of thin rope lying on the floor.  Deftly, I pick the rope up and place the cold dagger against my left arm, careful of the stitches. Then, after some finessing, I’m able to wrap the rope around my arm a few times, before tying the ends into a knot with the help of my free hand and teeth. After I pull my sleeve down, I can feel a sigh of relief escape my lungs when I realize that the sleeves are //just// loose enough that the dagger is unnoticeable. Feeling rather proud of myself, and a little reassured that I now have a weapon, I continue my search of the storage closet.  Farther into the storage closet, I can barely see anything except for vague silhouettes on the wall. There seems to be some sort of handle, but I’m unsure what it’s connected to. Is it another door? Why would there be a separate entrance to this storage closet? Where does it go?  I stumble my way into the dark, my good arm out to guide me, before I suddenly stop dead in my tracks. The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end as a cold breeze drifts through the storage closet, bringing along //something else//… A feeling. A feeling that I’m being watched.  Looking around is pointless, as I can’t see much of anything. But that means I’m unsure if there’s actually someone in this closet with me, or if I’m just being paranoid. And if I can’t see my surroundings, how do I know if it’s safe to retreat?  Something catches my attention- a small movement in the back corner of the storage room. I squint my eyes, trying to see into the inky blackness… only to realize that I’m staring at a //figure//. Whoever this figure is, it’s hard to see them clearly. They must be wearing dark clothes since they blend into the darkness so well…

[stormblessed95]

So I had an anon send me a very rant-y angry ask basically just not liking me and letting me know. Lol which that's cool. You do you. But they were so mad at me being a "big blog." Is it just cause I've been here for a while now? Is it the number of followers they think I have (because you can't see people's follower counts)? I never really thought of myself as a big blog before (until recently when it came up alot and a few friends also told me I was too) but someone explain to me what a big blog is? Lol

Regardless, just a PSA. I'm not forcing anyone to be here or to agree with me. Whatever you are on my blog for, the reasons are your own. I'm not and never have been here for followers. So anyone is free to unfollow or block me at ANY time. No hard feelings 😅😂

Anyways, anon can be mad. It's okay, I don't mind. It's deep cleaning day for me and I'll just get back to cleaning while I'm streaming! What is everyone else currently listening to?? I've currently got Set Me Free pt 2 going!

[papa-evershed]

Hellooooo! Here’s me crashing into your ask box to wish you a very happy, happy birthday!

I thought I’d ask you if you can remember some specific scenes/moments from a show and/or movie that triggered your “Oh, I need to gif this IMMEDIATELY!” desire.

And please do go ham on your reply, you know very well how much I enjoy them.

Have an amazing day! 🧡

Hey!!! I fucking love you! I don't know how the hell you manage to to do everything you do, but now you've gone and inspired me to start a fandom-friends birthday calendar. 😂😂 I legit admire how you always reach out to people and remember everyone!! But thank you so much for the birthday wishes, it's been a pretty good day so far so I can't complain! 🥰

As for moments I just had to gif?! There's been a fuck ton throughout the years and the men. 😅I'll answer under a cut for length and lets see what all my old lady brain can remember. 👵 I apologize in advance for how long this could potentially get and just how random the gifs probably are. I never feel inspired to gif cool scenes with witty dialogue, I just gif for thirst reasons because I'm a dumpster of a human. ETA: It got really long and didn't even scratch the surface tbh.

For Rob, I'll start with this one. I feel like I post it every time someone asks me about my favorite gifs or moments but listen, that man's god damn belly makes me feral. The context of the scene is also just peak Dad™ for me so it was 10000/10, absolutely had to gif this the second I watched:

This is an interview but you know when you first start checking out a new dude and you see gifs from interviews/shows where they look particularly tasty and you're immediately like I must find this and watch it or else I will perish. That was this interview for me. And how could it not be? Again...BELLY. Hairy belly. Just big, soft, delicious man meat. And thighs. As soon as I found it I had to gif it for myself so I could make it as obnoxiously big as humanly possible.

I watched this zoom live and the moment this motherfucker turned his head my brain said "gif it". Profile? Nose? Greys?

And this shot too. This man was fucking born to smile, he puts his whole ass into it.

This. His arms here. This scene was dark af but I knew I had to gif it anyway. I adore the shape of this man. It feels so fucking real to me. Soft belly, sizeable arms that still look natural. It's realistic, it's comfy, it's fucking sexy. He's just fucking man-shaped.

I don't even have to tell you why because I know you get it.

I'm an American what do you want from me? 🤡 I'm just kidding, it's not because of the gun. 😅IDK if you've watched Downton, but Thomas is just such a fucking capable man. There isn't a task they set him to that he doesn't excel at and I just felt like it was always overlooked and underappreciated by everyone around him. That shot and scene inspired an entire gifset I made about him being a man of many talents.🤓

I can't even explain it, I just knew I needed it. He just looks so man sized. And fuzzy. Just...go off daddy.

You and I both know I'd suck a dick for a good profile shot. The greys, the nose, the man...👀

I can't post all the gifs from this scene/episode so I'll settle for this one. But I knew immediately I'd be giffing it until my fingers hurt (that legit happens y'all, I'm old 👵) Not only did he spend some time in this episode being the soft, caring uncle but he did it in a cozy sweater and it was like they were sure to hit all my weaknesses at once. Soft cozy men? 👀Then they were kind enough to give us the most beautiful close-up shots of his face. And the boy just has a beautiful fucking face.

For old times' sake, I'm gonna include some Jon just for you but to be fair, I liked him for seven damn years so there were a lot. Too many to list or even remember. But here's a few that maybe aren't the obvious shots!

This one. I remember everyone losing their shit over his ass but I was losing my mind over that "soft flash of belly" (really, I was always fangirling the hardest over scenes where Jon looked softer than he really was so we shouldn't be shocked I eventually left for a man with a beer belly 😅)

Speaking of which, this scene too!

And of course, anytime he was covered in blood. I think I actually giffed this exact shot 5 or 6 different times.

And, the obligatory back of his head shot. There are so many here I could post because pretty much anytime I saw the back of Jon's head I immediately needed a gif of it but we'll go with this one, it was probably slept on a little bit.

Alright this is long enough! Bless anyone for reading this long. 😳 But legit, thanks for the fun ask and for the birthday wishes, Stef! 🥰🥰 Your kindness is one of the reasons I will always appreciate having been in Jon's fandom!

[impala-dreamer]

Beka, you're an adult, right? Do you have any advice for someone who is almost 30 and still doesn't really know how to adult? Or is it just a shared illusion that all adults have their lives completely figured out (which I kind of hope)? 🤔😅

Me, ticking down the weeks until I turn 39: I am an Adult? Yes. Sure. Mhm.

Lemme let you in on the grand secret of the universe:

No one has any idea what they're doing. No one has their shit together. No one has anything figured out. Even if it looks like we do, it's all a vast illusion propagated by social media standards and idiots with their "aesthetics" and long-standing social expectations that have been passed down through the generations to make you feel like a failure for not fitting in and conforming.

The very idea that someone out there has all of their ducks in a row is complete bullshit since ducks don't just stand there once you get them in a row and life, in general, is constantly changing. There is no way to set up the ducks so that they are perfectly in a line, all the time. It's just ludicrous.

Since I was 19 years old, I have been striving for perfection in adulthood and I have been an eternal failure. Except that in itself is bullshit, because the mere fact that I'm still alive tells me that I'm not a failure.

THERE IS NO PERFECTION. THERE IS NO WAY TO BE AN ADULT. It's all fake. It's all a lie.

If you're alive and breathing and the people that you are charged- whether by choice or fate- to care for are alive and breathing and relatively happy- then you are doing your best and have won.

I cannot find my fucking checkbook and I've been looking for it for the past two weeks and it's just - Gone. Directly resulting in the fact that my 1st quarter property taxes are a week late and I'll probably be charged a fee for that. I also am completely out of prescription refills for every single one of my medications and I can't get myself to any form of medical professional to get new scripts. My bathroom sink has been clogged for two years. Two lightbulbs are out in my kitchen even though there's a box of new lightbulbs under the kitchen sink. I haven't put away my clean laundry in months, I just pull shit out of the dryer or the tote bin I've chucked it into. I forgot to renew the car registration for our cars and we got a huge ticket last month. My son's birthday is Sunday and I can't make myself clean the living room even though we're having family over, and his friends over on Saturday. BUT -- my family is clothed and fed and happy.

Who's to say what adulting is and who can judge us?

IN CONCLUSION:

It's all a lie. There is no perfection. Adulting is just keeping yourself going.

The best advice I can give you is to do your fucking best to make yourself happy and Fuck Everything Else.

Amen.

[hughungrybear]

Me watching Dangerous Romance Ep.7:

1. I'm excited! Who's excited? We'll finally know the aftermath of the kiss. I mean, after Kanghan explicitly told Sailom that all he feels for him is guilt, how would he explain the kiss??? 😤😤😤

2. Waaaaait, hold up. Is grandma sick??? Also, Sailom is back in Kang's house eating dinner with the family but the two still seems a whole lot of awkward with each other. 😶

3. Oh, so Kang and Sailom didn't get to talk? Dammit, Guy and Auto. Also, that's no fair, Kang - telling Sailom you don't want to see him with anybody else but still have not retracted the part that all you feel is guilt and pity for him.

4. I almost forgot that they have connected bedrooms via a shared bathroom. Oooh, the possibilities lol 😅😅😅

5. Kang: "Give it to me straight". Me: "He can't. He is gay/bi." 😂😂😂 Yeah, I'll see myself out 😅😅😅

6. I laughed when Kang asked if Sailom wants to be his boyfriend. I mean, really? Really? Just the previous episode you were ready to punch Sailom for breaking Pimfah's heart and has also broke his heart in the process. No apologies? No backsies?? WTF. 😭😤

7. It's awfully quiet back there that if I'm the car driver, I would be suspicious 😂😂😂 Also, look at Kang's smile when Sailom opened the (bathroom) door for him.

8. Okay, Kang being completely honest about his feeling for Sailom is 😭😭😭😭 but his way of flirting is 😅😅😅😅😅 .

Guys, I died laughing. I already ascended to heaven (or descended to hell, am not really fussy about these things lol)

9. On the bright side, having Kang as a boyfriend means Sailom (and his friends) will never be hangry as he kept buying food/feeding Sailom tasty treats lol

10. Oooh, so Kang decided to start gaining Sailom's friends' trust by bringing them food? What are Guy and Auto, alley cats??? Lol.

11. Oh no! Grandma, be well 😭😭😭 Why were you lifting heavy objects? You are rich! Call someone to do it for you next time 😭😭😭

(Sidenote: My Grandma did something similar. She went ahead and used a ladder to change a lightbulb in her house but the ladder collapse under her weight and she hit her hip. After that, her hip deteriorated as she did not go to a doctor because she didn't want to 'waste' money. She was never able to regain her ability to walk and had to use a wheelchair until she died.)

12. Lightning striking just as Saifah swearing that he will never manipulate Kang's grandma to buy him things is peak comedy 😂😂😂 Also, yeah I don't trust Saifah. No offence but he hasn't done anything (in this series) that paints him as trustworthy lol

13. I forgot that Sailom's fave dish is grilled fish and veggies. But how did Kang know? Lol. See, told you Kang is treating Sailom's friends like pets 😂😂😂 Ngl though, I would have eaten the snacks and still not trust Kang to pull a prank or two lol

14. Wait, did Pimfah really asked Kang or is that an excuse? Also did they tell Pimfah about what is happening them or did they just let her figure things out? 😑

15. I would ignore the fact that Kang raided Sailom's drawers (without asking, mind) to get that shirt, but focus on his relentless cheesy flirting in a public transportation lol

16. Another sidenote: I cannot believe, not even for a second, that Kang's noodle is NOT spicy. For better or for worse, authentic Thai food is almost always spicy even without the chilis. Lol. Also, not related to the plot or story, if it's available in your local Asian grocery and don't mind spicy food, try the MAMA and MAMA OK instant noodles (esp. the salted egg flavour).

17. Tbf, I don't think it is just the spicy noodles. I doubt Kang has any experience shopping in a crowded public market. I mean, as a kid, my mum also used to drag me to our country's Chinatown market (because that's where all the cheap goods are) to shop and hated every minute of it because of the crowd, the heat, and the smell of wet goods exposed under the hot sun.

18. Auto: "We are not down to earth. We are just dirt poor". Harsh, but extremely accurate lol

Also Auto: We don't mind that (Kang spending money on them). Throw it all you want. We're all for it. Throw it this way. Screw dignity! Keep throwing! Don't hold back! 😂😂😂😂

19. Kang's road to romance is a bit rocky. It's a given that Auto and (more specifically) Guy will have a difficult time trusting Kang after the bullying incident in the first episodes. However, Kang's friends are also bonafide a**holes, even without Kang's prompting. 😅

20. Where is my Guy and Nava ship??? I swear if GMMTV does this like they did TiwPor in MSP (as if an afterthought), I WILL RIOT. 😤😤😤

21. Wait a freaking minute. These are high school students. I'm not saying I was a saint at that age, but I drunk beer in the privacy of my friend's backyard lol. Pretty sure underage drinking in a public place like a bar is illegal even in Asia.

22. It turns out, Auto is the worst kind of drunk lol. Also, I believe Chimon when he said Sailom cannot dance. You'll understand if you have seen an episode of the School Rangers 😂😂😂😂

23. Uhm, Miss, stop grinding. He is gay. Lol.

24. I mean, alcohol is not the best relationship starter, but if it will set my GuyNava ship to sail, I will take it (as long as everything is consentual, ofc) 😅😅😅

25. See, it is illegal. But Auto, learn to run faster, gawd dammit. Also, what would happen to Kang? Will his father scold him? I highly doubt it since they have been painting the man as "doting" to the point that Kang cannot disappoint him because he does not expect anything great or good from Kang. However, this might ruin his political dreams, so we'll see.

26. The dad finally getting angry with Kang only because it can potentially ruin his election run is all kinds of messed up. 😑

27. At this point, Sailom has displaced Kang as the favourite grandson lol

28. Ugh, Saifah. What are you planning??? Don't ruin this for Sailom 😭😭😭😭

29. Oof. The cheerleader outfits are cute. They look like Sailormoon's transformation outfit. 😍

30. Why are you flirting in front of everyone's salad, Kang? 😅😅😅 You have a game to play. Focus. 😆😆😆

31. I know people have been pointing out the similarities between this series and BBS. I guess the true test of acceptance is when your bff learns to play well together with your (not-yet) bf in a football match 😂😂😂

32. Kang being anxious that Guy (and Auto) will never like him for missing that goal is 😔😔😔 Also, I commend Guy (and Auto) for being so sharp, it hurts lol. Unlike some "friends" (looking at you, Wai) 🙄

Officially boyfriends!!! Will Kang ramp up his cheesy flirting? Also, Saifah being on Ms Ging's medical team CANNOT be a good thing. The man is not above stealing from patients. I can smell trouble.

[desolateice]

☉

what do you do when you get stuck writing? (from this ask game) Rubber Ducky Sometimes I just complain and talk about whatever the issue is and it works itself out while I'm talking. I think that's the rubber ducky method, which is why I've got a bazillion little plushies around so I can snag one and talk to it when I don't want to bother people. Switch WIP's. Once upon a time I tried to complete fanfics before starting a new one, but that was fine back when I wrote one fic for a fandom and then peaced out. Now I write a lot and want to write more so I juggle them around when i get stuck or realize I need to do a lot more research (cough the Johnny/Tommy fic cough) Sometimes by the time I recrack open the fic it's a lot easier. But it helps if I left myself notes. Skipping around using brackets So there's this idea that you should use the things you put off using, eat the things you want to eat and stop saving things for special moments. Which I suck at. I say this with a bright pink jackolantern on my desk full of treats I've squirreled away that I'm saving for a moment to try them or as a notebook hoarder.

But I've gotten better about this with writing. If there's a scene I really want to write I'll put brackets for whatever I need to come back and do so that I don't forget it, though sometimes I do this when I'm super tired and don't want to forget my ideas [Johnny and Daniel drive to Jersey and Johnny learns what a pain in the ass driving in winter is and Daniel is full of himself about it but also forgets he's not used to driving in a city/let alone on ice anymore and they safely crash into a snow drift] I dunno, something like that and then skip to whatever happened next that I wanted to write. It kind of helps and it seems like it wouldn't be easier to go back and fill in those gaps, but sometimes it is. And sometimes when I think there aren't any it's a pain because I thought it was done and it wasn't 😂 Do something else [shower] 🚿

Sometimes you gotta do something else physically and let your brain wander. I cross-stitch and embroider sometimes and I'll do this repetitive thing that requires me to physically be doing something and sometimes it'll jog something in the fic I got stuck with. Another good one is generally taking a walk but I'm like so bad at that, I'm not good with just wandering around without purpose 😅 I want to go somewhere and look at something or have someone to talk to so it doesn't quite work for me, but doing the dishes or cleaning or cooking or my tried and true method, taking a shower generally does it. I shower probably way too much that it's now like part of my daily routine like having a cup of coffee in the morning, taking a shower before bed lets me relax and also figure out whatever was stuck. Go go go pomodoro! 🍅 Sometimes people work really well under pressure and I...oh sometimes I work really well under pressure. 😂💀 So a pomodoro is a little tomato kitchen timer, and essentially you time yourself. You can pick the length and you just focus completely on that one task until your time is up. Like here: https://pomofocus.io/ is a timer that focus's on this task. It generally works better if you have someone else doing it with you. So a writer whose interview I watched last year said that every morning she and her friend set their computers down on their kitchen tables, call one another and sync their timers and write. And I find when I do this, the sort of stressors of that timer makes me skip all the stuff I generally worry about. Spelling, grammar, things I'd normally puzzle over that slow down my writing and I just go go go. It also stops me from like diving down rabbit holes for research which I do...frequently. 😂 Sometimes it's also called sprinting. Thank you for the ask! 💖

[lilflowerpot]

What an entire fucking mood, chasing the serotonin high of one particular fixation and absolutely nothing else until it wears off... at which point I have already become an immobile heap on the floor, drained of my passion and energy. And while yes questions about my stories or worldbuilding fuel me to think up answers for them, I too cannot force myself to answer in detail a topic that I am uninterested in. That's just how it is.

And eyup t'was me! Surprise! I've been lurking for A While now.

And I just like the... the one-ness with nature, that sort of reciprocal relationship that the Eiyyka’an religion dictates— I just love it when there's not a harsh line drawn between a people and nature. I like to read about such cultures, and I sure as hell love creating them. The jungles, the planet sustained you, and you would nourish it in return upon death. I also love the little tidbits that make the concept feel more full: the aristocrats and their owned land, the controversies arising from some circumstances because there's no way a culture or a collection of cultures would be entirely without conflicting beliefs and needs. So there's a... requirement? for places that produce food to label or mark whether their food was cultivated on a burial site. I like that sort of little thing that arises from building a unique culture. You did such a great job! Launching your dead straight into the heart of a star... what a fucking metal way to go. I can definitely believe that the Galra ancestors would have done it if they had the means to do so.

And I have indeed seen the punnett square post, even though the numbers made my head spin quite a bit (which is no fault of yours, I uh, I just have no sense of scale nor numbers unfortunately, someone could tell me “that's 100ft long” and I would be unable to envision the size of the object they're describing) and I will let you know that I found the subject matter deeply deeply fascinating!

My spoons keep being used up these days by all the too-ambitious odd projects big and small I've been taking up, I made good progress on my ongoing project series of character design sheets, though I haven't been able to write properly for a while now. I'll... get to it. Some day. Maybe I'll show you my stuff someday as well, and I assure you that reading Little Blade is still on my to-do list.

I hope you're having a nice day!

— the worldbuilding enthusiast

[1][2][3]

Hello again my darling! Evidently it took me a while to answer this one because I was, as you so eloquently termed it, "chasing the serotonin high of one particular fixation (TotK) and absolutely nothing else until it [wore] off," and now here we are.

The Eiyyka’an faith is near and dear to my heart because it just naturally wrote itself into something so gentle that I couldn't help but fall in love with it ♡ I myself have always been one for those sorts of cyclical, balanced relationships with the world, and it simply felt right to me that those who lived in the lushest most verdant areas of Daibazaal would consider it a profound blessing, and as such would want to give back as and when they could. And I'm pleased you feel I've done a good job regarding the little conflicts and controversies of Imperial culture, because as you say it wouldn't feel realistic for everyone to agree on everything—particularly in a people so numerous and widespread as the galra!

Nono you're absolutely valid in saying the punnet square numbers made your head spin (they certainly did mine), the human brain really isn't cut out to envision quantities on the scale we're talking for Imperial population 😅

Ah, the ol' spoon deficit,,,, believe me sweetheart, I've been there, but I'm glad to hear your personal projects are going well! I wish you the best of luck, love!!

[dreamlandcreations]

Burnout recovery (?)

It took me a while to figure out why I was so down all the time. But I didn't take the "good news" that well tbh. Because:

"It takes an average time of three months to a year to recover from burnout. "

And I was like. NOPE. FUCK. THAT!

Well, the first few days after that were even worse because I kept pressuring myself to do something, anything other than lying in bed and staring at the ceiling. But even something as so no energy "task" as listening to music was making me... idk how else to say it other than itchy...

Anyway, eventually I just gave up, let it consume me and slept away like 2 days... AND GUESS WHAT? I felt a tiny bit better.

So I'd say the first step is just LET IT ALL FUCKING GO! Turn the nagging in your head off and stop caring about anything else than getting a good rest!

My work drove me insane for the last 3 years or so and tbh it took over my life far, far sooner than that. It wasn't healthy. Letting that go took like 2-3 weeks ( I had "help" from other tortured colleagues 🫶 talking helps!) and a lots of Youtube shorts about "this is business not personal". Yay to scrolling paralysis.

Yeah, and about that. I realised that with the burnout I really burned all the bridges that kept my autistic/adhd traits in check. I mean, I used to have a good balance, now I'm off the scale with both in the worst way.

I think the second step is just trying to stay in that kind of relaxed, "don't care" space while figuring out the reasons why I felt so terrible. Again, Youtube shorts about autism/adhd and work mentality really helped. It was like talking to someone without actually getting myself together enough to open up about this to a "real person" (it never would have happened, you know).

And this is the part from where this might not help anyone who doesn't have adhd (and autism?) but realising that I've become a shell of adhd behaviour was actually a big step. Especially with the adhd/autism traits comparison vids bc I just understood how I was functioning when I was doing all that stuff at once.

The next step(s) I took was trying to take care of myself. Eat, sleep, wash, clean up to feel better in my skin and in my environment. I made it a challenge (chasing dopamine seems to be the only way adhd brain can do stuff). Like I'll put on this song ( I wasn't really listening to it still) and do .... until it's done. It did not help at first. Just getting into a task without thought doesn't work for me. I needed to take a minute and visualise that I'm going to do this and this and this and I'll be done in 3 minutes. I prepared for the task mentally, I hyped myself up then I did it. And it worked. Then I got too much into it and overworked myself 😅

However cliché it sounds, the key is finding balance.

Now I can listen to music, I've read 14 books this year so far and reading 5 others now, and I'm planning my year and thinking about what I want to do in life.

I still have bad moments/days and that's okay. I am still not okay but I'm getting there.

I figured, I need to occupy (not overwhelm!!!) my senses to stop my mind from wandering (and torturing me) so now when I have to do something like dishes, I just put on an audiobook and try to let everything else go.

I still can't watch movies/shows. Which sucks bc I feel like I need visual stimulation too sometimes so idk what's up with that but it's a no for now.

Writing is still a NO! (that's a screaming no in my head). But I started to write down ideas again (something I didn't really do for months)

What I know would improve my health and most likely my mental state is regular exercise, but I'm not there yet. I still regularly skip/forget to eat more than once a day so that's a priority.

It's also difficult to leave the house tbh. The outside world is overwhelming and I don't go out if I don't have to (which is like once a week now).

What I do know is that if you want to do something DO NOT SIT DOWN! You'll never get it done. There's no "in a minute" or tomorrow. If you want it done, do it now.

I'm working on building a structure/routine in my daily schedule that gives me a guide so I wouldn't waste my days but doesn't limit or outright strangle me with too many limitations by being to crowded.

[lcandothisallday]

blurb night✨ (open)

kinda bored and willing to write short blurbs/concepts for jack harlow and auston matthews (no urban tonight😅) PLS YALL REQUEST FOR AUSTON IM DESPERATE

for context, i don’t write explicit smut and my reader is typically always female as that is what im most comfortable writing. and let’s keep this a fun night so no mental health related angst cos im in a good mood at the moment LOL

SELECT FROM THE BELOW OPTIONS and give me the context you would like:) ex. fluff, angst, trope, etc.

1. "I can't stop thinking about you, even though I know we can't be together."

2. "You're the only one who understands me, and I don't know what I'd do without you."

3. "I love you more than anything, but I don't know if I can trust you again."

4. "I don't care what anyone else thinks, I want to be with you no matter what."

5. “The best and worst thing about you is that mouth of yours.”

6. "I don't know how to tell you that I need you without sounding needy."

7. "I'm scared of what will happen if we keep going down this path, but I can't help myself."

8. "I've never felt this way about anyone before, and I don't want to let you go."

9. "I don't know how to deal with the pain of betrayal from someone I trusted."

10. "I'm tired of feeling like I'm not enough, but I don't know how to change."

11. "You're the missing piece of my heart, and I don't want to live without you."

12. "I thought I had everything I wanted, but then I met you and everything changed."

13. "I know I messed up, but I'll do whatever it takes to make things right between us."

14. "I'm not perfect, but I'll always be here for you no matter what."

15. "I never believed in love until I met you, and now I can't imagine my life without you."

16. "I want to take things slow, but it's hard when all I can think about is you."

17. "I know we have a lot of obstacles to overcome, but I believe in us."

18. "You drive me crazy, but I can't help the way I feel about you."

19. "I'm not sure if we're meant to be together, but I'm willing to try."

20. "I never knew love could hurt this much, but I can't stop loving you."

21. "I don't want anyone else, I only want you."

22. "I don't know what the future holds, but I know I want you in it."

23. "I wish things were different, but I can't change the way I feel about you."

24. "You make me feel alive, and I can't imagine my life without you."

25. "I know we're taking a risk, but I'm willing to take it for you."

26. "I've been hurt before, but I'm willing to open my heart to you."

27. "I don't know what the future holds, but I know I want to spend it with you."