#but uh aren't those the only two options ever?
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hmm not very impressed by the eye doctor... he was 30 minutes late to start with and then he did the "1 or 2" thing like three times total and none of the options were any better than my current lenses. then instead of continuing to try he was like ok we'll order these lenses (even though the one he picked was still blurry?). i was like oh that's not quite... i was still having trouble with those... and he was kinda impatiently like well your eyes are dilated so we won't be able to tell for sure until you come back and your eyes aren't dilated. sir you were the person who dilated my eyes literally five minutes earlier... why would you have done that if it meant you couldn't get an accurate prescription?
#also at one point he looked at me very seriously and said#i always tell my patients that if you're pregnant one of two things will happen... either your prescription will change or it won't#and i laughed because i thought he was joking#and then he gave me a really weird look like why are you laughing at this serious advice#but uh aren't those the only two options ever?#either something will happen or it won't?#anyway ughhhh#i think doctors struggle a bit because i have a super super high prescription + pretty bad astigmatism#and it always seems to take forever to get a prescription that's mostly right#i'm like can i just save you the trouble and have you order like three different types of trial lenses#because this back and forth is going to take ages#and my rx is so off right now i don't feel great about night driving with the baby in the back
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π΄π³β // βπ³ββπ¦ββπΉββπͺβ βπ―ββπ¦ββπ¨ββπ΄ββπ§ββπΈβ.
Nate Jacobs + Fem!reader. Warnings : Dark. SFW, but discretion advised. π.
Part 1 : Whiplash
Part 2 : 9 Lives
Part 4 : Shards
Part 5 : Eighteen
Part 6 : Sin
You do NOT have permission to repost and/or translate any of my fics.
Tiny glimpse into his mind because why not?
Desc. : "His hand, so calloused from his pistol softly traces hearts on my face."
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It's not like Nate even knew you.
You just so happened to be the secret to his success, and maybe, perhaps his new obsession.
No biggie.
I mean, whole of the first week of spring break, he didn't text you, you didn't text him, and it was all great and normal.
Pissed him off to no end, because how the hell did you recover so quickly from having a fucking gun in your throat? But, hey, whatever. Maybe you were just that goddamn weird.
The second - and last - week of spring break was when shit got intense.
Because he thought about you.
He realized he hadn't even fucking seen you around town the entirety of it, and that might have freaked him out, just a little.
He worried, you see? Yes, only about his games, and his college apps, but now, all of them had been tied to you, with a pretty little bow around them.
So obviously, now he worried about you.
So, obviously, he needed to find out just where the hell your lucky ass had gone.
He narrowed it down to two options. Both perfectly reasonable, of course.
One, you just had tons of work and stayed indoors.
Two, you had been kidnapped and murdered by the opposing teams because they'd found out about your miracle-working.
See? Perfectly reasonable.
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It was a happy surprise to learn that you were basically closer to his house than you'd ever been before, after you'd taken up a job at the local supermarket.
Well, happy for him.
For you, it was more of a you-were-seriously-contemplating-suicide surprise.
"You listen to Elvis Presley?", he asked, dropping his purchase down on the counter. Your eyes never moved to it, and stayed on his.
That was one thing he noticed about you.
You were always observing, as if he were a rabid animal that would strike at any moment. As if he would reveal his sinister intentions to you within enough time for you to react.
"What?"
He nodded at the speakers on the wall around the establishment. "Those connected to your Spotify?"
You didn't want to answer unless you knew whether he was about to compliment or mock you.
"Sir, I think you should leave."
God fucking damn it. Why had he never thought about the fact that you wouldn't - (and couldn't)- call him a motherfucker at your workplace? His joy knew no bounds.
"That's so hot. Say it again."
You'd 100% expected that. It was clear on your face.
"There's other people behind you with more items to check out."
He swiveled his head around for a moment.
Old lady. Sometimes he wished he wasn't raised right.
He sighed, nodding. "I'm next up, though.", he warned sternly, pointing at you as he gestured for her to pass him by.
The old lady patted him on the shoulder and smiled, moving ahead with her purchase of an unholy amount of bread and cheese.
And what's worse?
She had coupons.
Way too many for Nate to stand smiling like a good boy behind her as she dug into her purse and fished out probably decades worth of them.
"Yes, dear, so just run all these."
"Uh, ma'am, I wish I could, but most of these are expired."
Thank god.
"Oh, well, you said most. Let's just sort through them and find the ones that aren't expired."
Would it be homicide to kill her? She didn't really have too long to live, anyway. He couldn't say he hadn't thought about it.
"Uh, okay, yeah, sure."
"This'll just take a minute, sweetie.", she whispered to Nate, pinching his cheek as if that would make time go by faster.
"How about I pay for you, ma'am? If that's alright?"
If he'd been allowed access to your mind, you'd never live it down, because you almost thanked him right then and there.
"Oh, there's no need for that, dear, I can-"
"No, please, I insist. It would be my pleasure."
"What a sweet boy."
Both her and Nate decided to ignore the derisive snort that came out of you as you swiped his card.
"Here you go, ma'am.", you smiled, placing the copious amounts of cheese into the bag, then stuffing the bread in, too. "Anything else?"
"Oh, no, that's it for me. God bless you, dear. Both of you."
Watching her walk out, he began to genuinely wonder if this absurd purchase was all part of some scheme some criminal had put up to steal without your knowledge.
"You hear that? We're blessed, you and me."
"Do you actually have anything to buy?"
"Of course I do. I'm not a creepy stalker.", he hissed, slamming his palm down in front of you. Slowly, he lifted it to reveal a stack of eleven condoms.
Oh, yeah, you were blessed with this fuckass' presence.
You sucked your teeth as your gaze traipsed from the condoms up to his eyes. One of them winked.
"Is that all?"
"Oh, come on, you're not even curious why I have them?"
"Probably for the dozens of bitches you're getting.", you scoffed, ringing it up. "$15.99."
"For eleven individual condoms?!"
You shrugged. "Inflation."
"Oh, they better inflate for the amount of money I'm spending."
He rolled his eyes, mumbling to himself as he pulled out the money from his wallet, instead of his card. "Fucking old lady with her bread and cheese."
"You maxed your card?"
"Yeah. Why do people buy so much shit they're barely ever going to use?"
"Like you with your condoms?"
Ah. Nate could've absolutely lost his shit laughing right there- you did care.
"I'm going to use it all. Trust me."
How many times was he going to use the phrase 'trust me' on you until he realized the meaning had eroded away into nothingness between you two? Probably a dozen more.
"Sure. Thanks for shopping with us. Have a great day."
He pouted, stuffing the packets into his pocket as he raised a brow. "You don't sound like you mean it."
"Nate-"
"And why are you even working here, anyway? Oh, shit, is it 'cause I cost you your internship with your perv boss?"
If he felt bad, the grin on his face wasn't really screaming guilt.
"No, fuckass, this is my friend's store, he just wanted someone to help him out for a couple hours."
"Whoa, wait, what happened to Sir? I liked that better."
That was a lie. He fucking loved it.
"Please, Nate. Stop."
"One condition."
There it was. It no longer seemed like he saw you as anything more than a boredom buster. Sudoku, or a crossword, basically. That was you to him.
"Answer one question, truthfully, and I'll leave this... otherwise empty store right after."
"I'm listening."
God, that's all he fucking wanted to hear, and it was oddly exciting. He could literally say anything, and you wouldn't block him out.
"What would you do if I told you that I have a body in my car right now?"
"What?"
"A body. A dead body. It's in my trunk. Right now. What would you say? What's your next move?"
It's like he expected you not to notice the fact that he was tracing shapes on your arm as he spoke.
"Cops."
At this point, even if he wasn't bluffing, you'd still have reacted so nonchalantly. Because it was all in all tiring to continue to play whatever twisted game he was playing.
"They're not an option. It's either silence or help me. Would you help me hide it?"
"Nate, did you kill someone?"
"No."
"Then why even ask?!"
"It's a hypothetical."
"No, probably not."
He tsked, looking away for a moment. "Wrong answer."
"Well, it's my answer."
He brought his fingers up to your face, and your slight flinch meant absolutely nothing to him. Imaginary hearts now plagued your skin. "Change it."
"My answer? No."
"Please."
"Nate, did you kill someone?", you asked once more, praying for an actual answer this time, be it in the negative or the positive.
He smirked.
"Thanks for the condoms.", he whispered, grinning as he gave your cheek a light pat - that was dangerously bordering on a slap.
Would your trunk be big enough to fit his body? You thought about it the rest of the day.
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His fingers rapped on his dashboard as he watched his phone, set down on speaker on the dashboard, too. Pick up, pick up, pick up.
"Hello?"
Yes. He'd never been this happy to hear someone's voice, and it kinda freaked him out. Okay, whatever. Not important.
"Y/N."
"Who is this?"
"The guy you broke all the rules with before spring break? Made out with on the bleachers?"
"You need to be more specific."
"You better be kidding."
"Of course I am." He had never felt more relieved to hear your stupid ass laugh. "What do you want? I'm not helping you hide a body."
He debated just asking you where you'd been all this time, why you hadn't shown up to a single party or hangout, but he decided he'd just outright ask the real question he needed answered.
"Which one's your window?"
A pause. "What?"
"The one with red or yellow curtains?"
"Nate."
"Red or yellow, babe?"
"Red." Good. You'd gotten so used to him that you didn't waste time pointing out the obvious by asking 'are you outside my house?!'.
"You sure it's not yellow?"
"That's my parents' room."
"Yellow looks more tempting.", he teased, as he shut the car door.
"I'm not messing around."
"Neither am I. Yellow it is."
"Nate!"
This was far too precious to him. You were actually worried. How cute.
The fact that he had to climb up wasn't really making him jump in joy, but he figured you'd enjoy that little touch of vintage chivalry.
Like fucking Rapunzel.
He tapped on your window once.
No answer. Don't fucking play around right now.
He knocked once more.
He was met with your extremely delightful glare as you slid your window up, watching him closely.
"Hey."
"Dude, you-"
"Shh, shh, shh. Let me in.", he mumbled, crouching to cram himself through, his hand still resting on the top of the pane.
"You're insane."
Immediately grabbing your face after he steadied himself, he hissed through gritted teeth, "Where the hell have you been?"
"What?"
"I didn't see you at all before today!"
"Yeah, we got a lot of work to do over spring break."
"This is why you don't take psychology, because you get stupid amounts of homework even during the holidays.", he muttered, as if he'd warned you about this eons ago.
"What do you want?"
"Party. You. Me. Now. Get dressed."
He almost punched you when you started laughing.
"You actually do have a sense of humour, Nate, good for you."
"I'm not kidding. Come on."
"No way in hell."
"You know what? No need to get dressed. You look great. Just come on. Live a little."
"You've already taken me to 'live a little' before, and I ended up shitfaced with a gun in my throat at school at 12:30 am."
Good. So you hadn't gotten over that. He didn't care if he was being sadistic - he was glad.
He sighed, flopping down onto your bed and ignoring the second glare to come from you that night. "This is so typically a teenage girl's bedroom."
He had no clue what he was saying, at this point. But he knew he was itching for a reaction, a reason for you to hit him again, so he could grab you and shut you up. He craved the conflict.
"Surprising, considering that's what I am."
"I mean, the band posters? Really?", he huffed, pointing around at your room as if he was giving you a tour of it.
"Have you even listened to Queen? Presley? Any of the oldies?"
The match was found. Time to light it.
"So the shitty music in the store was connected to your playlist.", he chuckled, shaking his head. "No wonder that old lady was so nice to you. She thought you were one of her Bingo buddies."
It was just a question of how long you could stand him sitting on your bed, disrespecting your music taste.
"If you're only here to invite me to a party, I'm sorry, I'm not coming."
"How would your family like me hanging out here?", he mused, tilting his head. You know, the one you'd probably love to bash into the pavement given a chance? That head.
You were so fucking hot when you were pissed, it was unbelievable to him. He could sense it, the anger.
The smell of your rage made him want to riot.
"You can't keep blackmailing me into doing what you want."
"Alright, fine."
Your uncomfortable frown made him snicker. "What's that look?"
"This is usually the part where you self-harm and tell me I'm being a bitch for not bending to your will."
"Tonight's different."
"Why?"
Because I'm going to unwrap every fucking secret of yours.
He shrugged, the corners of his lips curling downwards. "I don't want to."
"So, you'll leave?"
"I didn't say that.", he trailed off, watching you sit down on the chair across from your bed. "Let's just chill."
"Nate, when have you and I ever chilled?"
He licked his lips, narrowing his eyes at you, before giving you a sly smirk. His fingers emerged from his pocket as he pulled out a packet of pre-rolleds. "Right now."
"You're kidding."
"C'mon. Don't be a pussy."
"They'll smell it."
He lolled his head over to the door. "No, they won't. You're two floors up." He shifted to one side, patting the space next to him. "Come on, Y/N, don't end your badass streak so quickly."
His eyes followed you as you sat down gingerly, rubbing your forehead like he was causing you a genuine migraine. That's funny, she hasn't even seen me high, yet, (and she won't).
"Why do I let you do this?"
"Million dollar question if I ever heard one.", he scoffed, fumbling around his person for a lighter. He found it, placing the cigarette between his lips and lighting it, causing his next catastrophic words to come out a mumble. "But I'm glad you do."
He continued to watch your eyes change from frustration to mild fascination, to hesitation all in one second, as he puffed out through his teeth. "Fuck.", he groaned, handing it to you.
"I don't know about this."
"You think they'd like me?", he mused, looking at the door, and then back at you. "I'm known to make a good impression with parents."
"The no-blackmail thing didn't last long.", you huffed, taking it from him. Nate almost made out with you right then and there, the way your lips wrapped around it as if they were made only for him.
"Didn't want to break tradition.", he snorted as you coughed and sputtered, handing it back to him quickly.
"Gross."
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The last thing he'd expected from that evening was actually staying. He'd thought he'd get you stoned, you'd pass out, and he'd leave.
But here you were.
Next to him.
Freaking him the hell out.
He looked down at his watch. 2 AM. Fuck.
"I gotta go."
"You've been saying that for the past three hours."
Shut up. "Eh, well, it's not like my parents are worried."
"Why not?"
"They know I can handle myself."
"Right, because I'm such a threat."
"God, no. They'd love you." He shook his head subtly, grinning as you nudged his face playfully with your foot from across the bed. "You should come over, sometime."
"I'm not coming over, Nate."
The weed made sure you didn't push him away when he gently grabbed your leg. "Why not?"
"Because we're not friends. There's no reason for me to meet your parents."
"I just think it's right that you get to judge my room, too.", he muttered, lips on your ankle like it was his life support. "You know, justice or whatever."
"It's probably all monocoloured, plain, boring crap."
"Only one way to find out.", he teased.
He despised the silence that followed. High-you wasn't exactly chatty, it seemed.
"Tell me something about you."
"Like what?"
He shrugged. "Anything."
"This is my first time smoking weed."
"Not exactly a secret, sweetheart."
"You didn't ask for a secret."
"Now I am. Tell me a secret."
"I hate football."
You were more resilient than he thought, seeing as you'd smoked three cigarettes already, and the most you'd given him was your sports preferences.
But he'd take what he got.
"Because of me?"
"No, just generally."
"But you came to games.", he countered.
"Because of Maddy."
"You guys are close?"
You nodded, stirring slightly as you looked out your window. "Mhm."
"So she told you." Shit.
You tilted your head, sitting up as he gripped your calf, moving closer and placing kisses on your knee, too. "About?"
Well, if you didn't already know, no need to tell you.
"To come to the games."
"Oh. Yeah."
Nice save, Jacobs.
"I guess now I owe you a secret, huh?"
"I guess you do."
"You're not gonna like it.", he murmured, lazily tracing even more shapes on your knee, while his other hand had trailed up to your arm. "But I love your lips."
He smiled when the corners of your eyes crinkled up and you burst into a fit of giggles. "What?"
"It's true. They're perfect."
"God, I love weed."
You would, seeing as you smoked more of it than he did. Enough to kind of make him feel slightly guilty.
"It's not just the weed saying this.", he continued, shaking his head. "I'd fight wars for those lips. For you."
He shouldn't have liked the fading of your laugh so much, the slight trepidation brewing on your face, either, but for some reason, he did. "Nate, I'm not... I don't wanna-"
"Be fought for? Why not?"
He took the silence as a cue to brush his finger against your cupid's bow. "You don't think you deserve it?"
He watched your lips move under his finger as you shook your head, side to side. "Well, I do. And, guess what?"
"What?"
"I got another question for you."
Your frown was your response.
"Why didn't you push me away when I kissed you that night on the bleachers?" He knew the answer. Of course he did.
"I was drunk."
"Yeah, see, you weren't that drunk.", he taunted. But no, you were. He'd given you basically one and a half bottles. Just like tonight, taking barely ten puffs while you took thrice as much. You just hadn't noticed.
"I don't know, then."
"I just think that if you didn't push me away, it can't have been the terrible experience you made it out to be, in the car."
"What do you want to hear, Nate?"
"That you want to do it again. 'Cause you do. Don't you?"
"I don't."
"Yes, you do. If you could see your own eyes right now, you'd agree."
"Really?"
"Mhm."
He waited for a reaction, a scoff, an eye roll, anything, but you just looked back at him, and then down at the hand he was holding. Oh, it was the weed.
So he took matters into his own hands. No. He took you into his own hands, tracing the gap between your lips with his tongue before he pushed it in.
Your lips were war-worthy, just like before. But this time, something was different. This time, you kissed back.
There we go.
His hands ran over your back as though he were splaying a huge deck of cards across a table, and he came to the grave realization that maybe, just maybe, he was no longer doing this just for a reaction.
"Come here.", he murmured, making up for his lack of oxygen by trying to steal yours as he pulled you onto him. How Shane Crestin hadn't killed himself over the fact that he'd fumbled this bag, he'd never know. Loser.
His hands slipped under your shirt. Wrong move, seeing as you pulled away. "No."
Wasn't weed supposed to last longer?
"What?"
"I'm not... no."
"You seemed into it, like a moment ago. Face it : you want this. No amount of bullshit self-respect or whatever you wanna call it, is going to change that.", he responded, coolly, as he took a drag from the blunt, his lips immediately feeling the lack of yours.
"You're just trying to get back at Maddy."
God, he wished that were true. Would make much more sense.
He sighed, his forehead on yours. "I'm not, but you're not going to believe me.", he mumbled, watching you get off him and move back to the other side of the bed.
Oceans away. Too fucking far.
"I'm sorry." There was something he hadn't said in a while. "For, like, everything."
"Why am I so fucking important to you? If I just showed up to every game for you, would you leave me the fuck alone? No, you wouldn't, because you sought me out during spring break! Am I just an easy target?"
No. "I don't... I don't fucking know, okay? You just are."
"Is it 'cause you hate me?", you questioned, so quietly that he had to debate whether to get on his knees and beg for forgiveness or actually kill himself in guilt for eliciting it.
"What?"
"Do you hate me?"
"For what?" He had no fucking clue what this could be about. Every single thing he'd done so far indicated the opposite. But he didn't want to let himself go there.
"Being your good luck charm."
Oh. He had to think about that one. "No. It would be weird if it was someone else."
"I just mean... it must be frustrating, when you need someone, and they might not always be there."
"But you will, right? Be there?"
"You scare me, Nate."
He scoffed, slightly, rolling his eyes. "You're unbelievable. Why? Gimme one reason - a real one - why you're scared of me."
"You're violent."
Okay, he was hoping you'd give an invalid one.
"I like beating people up.", he shrugged. "But never for no reason."
"Not exactly a secret, sweetheart. And anyway, it's not only the beating up that you like."
"Hm?"
"You like getting beat up, too."
Remind him never to give you weed again.
"Why would I-"
"On some level, you feel like you deserve it.", you replied, shrugging as you took a long puff of the miracle weed that apparently made you unreasonably perceptive.
Okay, confirmed, not even the word weed would be mentioned around you anymore.
"You think I deserve it?"
"Mostly, yeah. But not... all the time."
"How do you know so much?", he asked, watching your fingers get lost in your hair. He couldn't afford eye contact.
"Psychology."
"See? You shouldn't have taken it. It's creepy."
You sighed, smiling as you looked up at the ceiling. "Sorry."
He did not expect you to back down, that was for sure.
"It's fine. Never giving you weed again, though."
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It actually took until the very last day of spring break for him to catch up with you again. Not like he was pissed that you pushed him away, or anything. Or that he was confused about the entire interaction in the bedroom of someone who, until three weeks ago, he wouldn't have been caught dead talking to. He was just busy. Sure. Let's go with that.
"Hey."
"Not now, Nate."
"What is your problem?" Wait, no. That kinda talk was why you were pissed at him. "Look, we should start over."
God, he sounded like a cunt. This was definitely something that pathetic Shane Crestin would say. Ew.
"Okay. Can you start by going over there?", you asked, restocking the shelves with whatever bullshit condiment you had to.
"I'm an ass. I'm a jerk, I'm- I'm a dick."
You were silent for a moment, before you added: "A small one, too."
He sighed, beaming with relief. "A small one, too.", he agreed, nodding. "I'm just here to ask you over to dinner. My house. I'll even cook."
Dude, if you didn't agree, he'd actually fucking kill you.
"No way you cook."
"Only one way to find out."
He saw the falling apart. The gradual breaking down. The glacier was melting. "I'll listen to Queen or whatever, with you."
The quiet was taunting him, but you came to his rescue. "No steak."
"No steak."
Yes. Fucking yes.
#if you don't think queen rocks i'm glad i don't know you#the shane crestin beef is real#nate euphoria#euphoria x reader#euphoria#nate jacobs x y/n#nate jacobs x you#nate jacobs#nate jacobs x reader#nate jacobs fic#nate jacobs fanfic#euphoria fic#euphoria imagine#nate jacobs imagine#euphoria x you#nate jacobs fluff#euphoria fluff#euphoria dialogue#nate jacobs blurb#nate jacobs imagines#nate jacobs oneshot#nate jacobs hc#nate jacobs drabble#nate jacobs fanfiction#euphoria smut#nate jacobs smut
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how much does sonia matter to the story of totk
sonia... is certainly a character in totk, but right now i want to take a look at her appearances within the story and see just how much of an effect she actually has on the narrative of this game. i will only be looking at memories and actual story beats, things such as those floating tablets (idk what they're called i never bothered with them) will be omitted because they are entirely optional content and have nothing to do with the actual story, i'm only considering the memories and present events that most players intending to experience the full base story will see. (i'm not even sure if the floating tablets have anything story-relevant in them, anyways, from what ive seen its just world-building and little character moments.)
it's worth noting that i do like sonia, and i don't particularly think she's a bad character; i enjoyed her, but it's questionable just how relevant as a character she is to the story. i also have a generally negative opinion of totk and its story, so that might alter the way i think about this game and it's story. feel free to take what i say here with a grain or two of salt.
spoilers for a fair bit of totk ig
(post is extremely long yknow how it is 2,581 words under the cut)
sonia is definitely present for the story in the past; she is a comforting presence for zelda and a supporter of rauru. she has power over time (recall, i suppose), and is the queen of the hyrule that rauru has founded, and was formerly a priestess before meeting rauru.
before really starting, i want to bring up that the first time the public got to see sonia was in the 3rd trailer; specifically it is where memory 6 is edited, specifically making it appear that sonia, with her hand outstretched and glowing, is the one therefore shooting the beam of light in the very next cut. in reality, in the actual scene, rauru is the one shooting that beam, but i want to keep this specific edit made in the final trailer in mind, since i want to talk a little bit more about sonia's presence in the story in general at the end, because, again, i personally like her, and am admittedly frustrated with how the game and its story ends up using her.
i consider a character to matter to a story when they do something that impacts or helps move it along. for example, despite being very non-characters, i would consider the old sages to be important as they provide exposition directly to link and the new sage as well as bestow upon them their blessing and their secret stone. they have some kind of effect on the story and other characters and carry out a specific role. if you erased the old sages, you would be missing characters that provide more information to the new sages and properly mark them as their successors in the present. even though they aren't really fleshed out in any sort of way, the old sages play an important role in the central plot of the story. the story needed them to play their specific role in order for the game to progress and for the narrative to continue as intended. they do something to shape the path that the narrative takes, they have an effect.
sonia is a character who technically only ever appears in the memories. i'm completely ignoring her appearing after the final boss simply because she has no dialogue at all and its really nebulous what she and rauru even do. worth noting that she is not alone in that scene; rauru is present with her.
sonia is introduced in memory 3 and then is killed in memory 9, i'm also ignoring her, uh, cadaver in memory 10 for obvious reasons. sonia is therefore active in the world of the past for 7 memories out of the total 15 that take place in the past. sonia is alive for less than half of the memories. furthermore, of those 7, sonia only actually appears in 6 of them, memories 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, and 9, and has dialogue in memories 3, 4, 8, and 9, barely over a fourth of those memories.
noting when she appears and when she speaks is important, since because of the fragmented nature of the past memories, character dialogue is very important in knowing what they do and what information they impart. sonia has a purpose in the memories where she doesn't speak, but i'll get to those after looking at the ones where she does speak.
what sonia does in memory 3: she is the first to approach zelda and her touch is what wakes zelda up. sonia is much gentler with zelda, giving her her name and reassuring her that she is safe.
what sonia does in memory 4: she's mentioned by rauru to have a secret stone and likely used as the example of a secret stone holder due to her own time powers. sonia is the one who says that zelda has both light and time powers, and also says that she can also somehow tell that she and zelda and blood related. sonia nudges rauru for (i think) being a bit cold, and is once again the one to comfort zelda and provides her with a place in the past. she is gentle and patient with zelda.
what sonia does in memory 6: she has no dialogue, but is present to... i'm not sure what she and zelda do here, but i'll say that sonia is supporting rauru's magic with her own. she prompts zelda to join her, and reacts to zelda's magic, telling us that zelda is unusually powerful by comparison.
what sonia does in memory 7: she does absolutely nothing other than be specifically noted by ganondorf for having a secret stone as well as being a hylian woman that rauru took as his wife, and smiles comfortingly at zelda.
what sonia does in memory 8: she recalls a cup that zelda knocks over (the only the we see her use time powers), inquires about zelda's well-being, gives an explanation on how zelda could learn to use her time powers (as well as this being somewhat of an explanation of how recall generally works?), shes comforting again and brings up zelda's light powers, and is the one to bring up link.
what sonia does in memory 9: before the memory, she agrees to meet with the fake zelda (knowing that it is truly not zelda) and clearly planned with the real zelda to confront it. she is the one to point out that the fake zelda is... fake, and controlled by ganondorf, and then is killed after fake zelda disappears.
sonia, from then on, is not present in any future memories, and only ever makes an appearance in the present at the very end with rauru.
so. how much does sonia matter to the story?
she definitely matters as a supporter of zelda and as the one to truly help her feel comfortable in the past and gives guidance about her powers. she's the queen of this ancient hyrule and rauru's wife and a holder of a secret stone. these have relevancy to the narrative, but they don't mean anything in the long run unless they actually effect the plot. she supports zelda, but it doesn't really change anything major, just helps her feel comfortable until things come crashing down again. she helps zelda harness her time powers, which we really only see zelda use against ganondorf and presumably to collect the master sword (and considering that her time powers never show up again, i guess zelda transfers them to link), but zelda is already shown to have great power from the start, and we never actually see zelda training or even struggling to use those powers, she just talks about not quite understanding them, and the first time she uses them she clearly has great control.
sonia conveys the information that zelda has time and light powers, and that zelda is related to sonia and rauru, both of which are fairly important, but sonia saying zelda has these powers merely spells it out for us, it doesn't affect anything about those powers, and zelda being related to sonia and rauru does nothing except explain the origins of her powers. she brings up link in front of rauru, but rauru could've easily learned about link any other way, most notably from zelda herself, so sonia bringing this up just changes when rauru learns about link.
through memory 6 we learn that zelda is, in fact, especially powerful specifically because she is being compared to sonia, who expresses surprise, though, again, this changes nothing, it merely brings attention to something already present.
sonia is suggested to have caught on to the fake zelda's ploy and we can assume that she had a hand in setting up the 'trap' that she and zelda spring on it. she implies that she, while knowing, agreed to meet with it and set this trap with zelda. after fake zelda disappears, she is then killed and removed from the story, though her death motivates zelda and rauru and marks the shift from a tense peace to outright war with ganondorf, and her death is what allows ganondorf to get his hands on a secret stone.
in a sense, sonia does matter to the story. she conveys information for the player and for other characters' benefits, she is an important person in the world of the past, and her death is a major turning point. but... at the same time, sonia does not really matter to the story.
she conveys information that doesn't really change the course of the story. her biggest decided-upon action was done off screen and with supposed help from zelda (and perhaps even rauru) and the biggest impact she makes, the one thing concerning her that actually causes things to move along or change in the course of the story, is her death. a character's death doesnt necessarily mean that from then on they are no longer important to the story, but with sonia, she is completely out of the picture. she motivates zelda and rauru, yes, but that's not exactly the same as mattering to the story. either way, if ganondorf declares war after stealing a secret stone, zelda and rauru are going to fight back with the sages.
sonia's death matters to the story. sonia herself does not matter to the story.
sonia doesn't do anything. she talks, conveys information, comforts zelda and gives her little pointers, but not once do we see her do anything that matters in the greater narrative. nothing she does in the past has any relevancy to the gameplay the players experience, or the side of the story that concerns link. she doesn't play a role that further aids our protagonists asides from maybe helping zelda learn to use her time powers. any information she conveys could have been learned through other means, or otherwise wasn't actually important to the events of the plot.
the most we really see her do is lure out fake zelda, but even then, zelda is the one to actually act in retaliation of the attack, and the most sonia does in that one scene, aside from convey more information, is die. and it's the only thing she does that actually causes a development in the plot or matters in general.
in addition to this, sonia does not do anything alone. she is always related to another character: she comforts zelda, she's rauru's wife and queen, ganondorf kills her, she and zelda corner fake zelda, she supports zelda and rauru. nothing she does she does on her own, there is always another character involved, she plays an extremely supportive role and does absolutely nothing outside of that. she exists to give the players information, she exists to support and motivate zelda and rauru, she exists as a character for ganondorf to kill to prove his evil and steal a secret stone. she is not an independent character within totk's story. she doesn't matter to the story as a character because she is barely even considered an independent character within that story.
when we see her at the end, the one time she is relevant to the present, she appears with rauru.
you could remove sonia from the story and swap her out with just having her secret stone hanging around the castle somewhere and the major events of the story would not change. sonia being the queen and rauru's wife only matters because then her death can motivate rauru, and by extension, the kingdom. sonia being so tender with zelda only matters because then her death motivates zelda. sonia having time powers and being related to zelda only matters to explain why zelda has time powers at all. these qualities do not matter outside of these characters that she is always shown with. the only thing about sonia that matters to the narrative is her death.
and. i don't dislike sonia! i like her! i think she's a good character, she has a personality and manages to be likeable even though she is always attached to a separate character! but she has no effect on the present and doesn't do anything that is relevant to any plot points. and it's so frustrating to see!
she's a major character in the past, and yet is hardly important, has four scenes total where she speaks, and dying is the most important thing we ever see her do. the only effect she has on the present is that the secret stone that ganondorf has was stolen directly from her.
it's just... frustrating to see yet another female character exist mostly just to die and motivate other characters, to see a major female character's only defining traits be that she is kind and nurturing and motherly and you never see anything beyond that.
and i come back to the game's third trailer.
just with the fact that sonia is shoved in a corner and is yet another female character that does not exist independent of others in this story, that we see her use her unique power exactly once to rewind a teacup, that's enough to frustrate me. sonia could've been a much more important and impactful character, but the most important thing concerning her is her death, and not even in a 'haunts the narrative' kind of way- she dies, motivates others, and is never brought up again.
and yet, in the third trailer of the game, memory 6 is cut up and presented in such a way that implies this at-the-time mystery female character had shot that beam of light, and that she would therefore be a powerful character. nothing is done without a reason in fiction, and this applies to game trailers.
i just don't understand why sonia was framed in such a deceitful way in that trailer. i can understand misdirection for the sake of avoiding spoilers, but... when it comes to characters like sonia, who in reality have very little impact on the narrative in this way, it just feels... almost a little devious, and it's so frustrating to watch that part of the trailer that teased a powerful female character (not a new concept for the zelda series, either!!!) and then, when the game rolls around, all of a sudden not only is she not the one with that power, but she is merely supporting the male character with that power.
there's absolutely a whole thing that can be said about female versus male characters in media and video games just with contrasting that part of the third trailer versus the actual in-game scene.
and i just can't help but feel bad for sonia after all of this, a character who could've been an important figure in totk's narrative, who just ended up being a character defined by the moment they stop being relevant.
so... yeah. sonia doesn't really matter to the story of totk, and it's in a really frustrating way. though i have a generally negative and almost spiteful attitude towards totk, none of that spite or anger is directed at sonia- i really wish she had a better role in the story, and i think she honestly deserves it and i don't think anyone is at fault for being fooling into thinking she would be this important and powerful figure. there's serious potential just with the pieces the story does give us! it's just all squandered to make her exist for the sake of other characters.
this might've gotten a bit off-track from that i wanted to say at the start, but... unfortunately, sonia as a character doesn't really matter to the story of totk, and i really wish that she did.
#loz#legend of zelda#totk#sonia#totk critical#salty talks#fyi while i just skimmed the yt vid to see what memories sonia shows up in i just watched in 2x speed to figure out if she talks#so it was just kinda really funny despite a lot of the memories being just standing around talking#do yourself a favor and watch the cutscenes on 2x speed#i watched them in 2x speed bc i dont want to waste too much time on this fucking game but it was at least entertaining#imo sonia got done so dirty in this game. its the only one she exists in too which sucks even more#like when zelda/tetra gets fridged or whatever its like. we see her in other contexts at least but with sonia thats it. damn#this did start off bitter and angry at the game but just ended up kind of like. sadly upset at what was done with her#bitching abt totk#adding that one so this gets lumped in with my other totk salt posts but this one def has a different tone#off topic but man zelda having time powers was some bullshit that only mattered in the past and to give the play a rewind toy#and to allow for some plot stuff obviously. sonias fucking powers are more important than sonia is
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Mini Fanfic #1163: Christmas Shopping Shenanigans (Super Smash Bros Ultimate)
7:55 p.m. at New Donk City's Metro Grand Mall Center........
The Jewelry Store
Fox: (Looks Down at the Glass Display Case in Front of Him) Okay, let's see......Hmm....(Points at Some of the Necklaces thar Interest Him) This would look nice on her.....And that one......Ooh, now that one looks a-
'Ahem'
Fox starts getting startled and quickly turns around to see his friends Samus, Falco, and Banjo staring at him.
Fox: Uh....(Leans himself Back on the Case with an Awkward Smile on his Face) H-Hey guys....What's up?
Samus: (Raises an Eyebrow While Crossing her Arms Together) Foxy.....What are you doing?
Fox: Oh, you know. Just.....doing some Christmas shopping and whatnot?
Falco: (Already Unconvinced) Really? At a Jewelry Store?
Banjo: (Raises an Eyebrow in Genuine Confusion) An expensive one at that?
Fox: Hey, I had to start somewhere. And besides, it's the only one I can find here that isn't completely crowded yet.
Samus: ....Riiiiiight. You're not trying to buy any an expensive jewelry for a certain blue fox lady for Christmas this year, are you?
Fox: ...........I can't......Confirm or deny that accusation-
Samus/Falco: Fox!
Fox: ('Sighs in Defeat') Alright, alright, fine! You caught me! I couldn't tink of anything else to give to her...(Starts Rubbing The Back of his Head Back and Forth) So I figured a necklace of some kind could suffice. And before anyone get more on my case, the thought of coming to any of you guys for advice hasn't really crossed my mind since then, not like I wanted to bother you all in the first place....
Falco: Yeah? Well, you maybe should have the thought jammed into that thick skull of yours, dumb-dumb!
Samus: You know we wouldn't have any problem helping you with this, Foxy. We always got back.
Banjo: (Smiles Reassuringly) Yeah, we would've thought of way better gift options than some necklace.
Fox: Hey, what's wrong with giving her a necklace?
Samus: Well, for starters, like we mentioned, most of jewelry in here are expensive. Even more so than the ones Smash Mall has to offer. Second, you and whatsherface aren't close enough for you to go out and buy her a necklace to begin with. (Forms a Sly, Teasing Smirk on her Face) Unless~
Fox: (Sighs While Facepalming Himself) How many times do I have to tell you that we're not even close to dating each other again? And her name is obviously Krystal, Samus.
Samus: I know. Doesn't mean I trust her completely though.
Banjo: You ever thought about getting back to together with her someday? I think you two would be really cute together.
Samus: (Rolls her Eyes) To some capacity....
Fox: Samus
Samus: What? Just saying.
Fox: (Turns to Banjo) I thought about it sometimes, but I wanna focus on maintaining our friendship for now if that make sense.
Falco: (Casually Shrugs) Works for me. But since were on the Krystal topic, that leads us to the third reason of why your necklace gift is stupid.
Fox: Really don't think there's anything inherently wrong with the idea.
Falco: Yeah, unless you're desperate love puppy, which you ain't. Now, don't interrupt. As what i was saying, I, your best friend and first bro, highly doubt Krystal would want you to go out of your way to buy her something crazy expensive. Hell, i know for a fact she'll scold you if you do that.
Fox: ('Sigh') You're not entirely wrong there...But what else should I give then?
Falco: I remembered her telling me she's been wanting one of those pleated scarfs to wearing the rest of winter. It ain't grand and all, but it's somethin' at least.
Banjo: (Happily Nodded in Agreement) That would be a neat gift to give her. I'm actually thinking about getting Kazooie one myself.
Samus: I'm doing the same for Chun-Li and Li-Mei. Heard the wintertime is getting even chiller this time around and I don't want my girls catching themselves a cold or flu.
Fox: (Simply Nodded) Then it's settled. We'll give our respective love ones scarfs for Christmas this year.
Falco: Sounds like a plan for you guys. In the meantime, I will be giving my gal these limited edition air rider's boots. (Shows the Gang a Picture of the Black Leather Boots on his Phone Before Rolling his Eyes) She hardly shuts up about even before we got here.......
Exotic Clothes Store
Luigi: (Walks in and Look Around the Store with Daisy Following Behind) You sure there's something in here Lili would like? (Starts Blushing at Few of the Most...... RisquΓ© Outfits and Items Present) I-I don't I have a clue where to start looking.......
Daisy: Yeah, this is a first for me too. (Grabs her Chin While Thinking) But she is a little more stylish and adventurous than the two of us combined. (Turns to Luigi) You think she'll like any of these outfits in here? I can picture her looking good in some if them.
????: Lovely idea~
The duo turns around and see their pink haired, succubus girlfriend standing behind them wearing a red leather jacket and skirt.
Lilith: (Lowers her Sunglasses Down) But having a wonderful, loving plumber and princess such as yourselves, are far more amazing gifts than this place has to offer~
Luigi/Daisy: (Happily Gasps at the Sight of.....) LILITH!~ (Rushes Over to Hug their Girlfriend)
Luigi: What are you doing here?~
Daisy: We missed you so much!~
Lilith: (Heart Begins to Melt in Pure Happiness as She Hugs her Partners Back) You guys!~ I missed you more!~ We just got done doing another runway show around this city. So we decided to spend the rest ofbthe holidays here.
Daisy: We?
Lilith: Me and Morrigan. (Rolls her Eyes) She's probably out flirting with some random guy again.....
Meanwhile Somewhere at the Middle of the Mall.....
Morrigan: (Sitting Next and Talking Someone on the Bench) So you're telling me you used to be a king of this....."Dreamland" you speak of?
Dedede: Yeah, those were the glory days I tell you what. (Crosses his Arms While Forming a Cocky Smirk on his Face) Accomplished quite a lot during those fruitful times.
Morrigan: Ooh really now?~ (Smirks Vack in a Seductive Manner) Do tell, my dear~
Dedede: (Chuckles Lightly) Well, personally, I ain't the most bragging person in the whole globe. (Leans Closer to the Long Haired Lady) But I'm more than willing to break a few boundaries for a pretty thang like you~
Morrigan: (Giggles Softly) A humble gentleman as well?~ Is there any more of you that meets the eye?~
?????: How about an uncle of many?
Dedede immediately gets startled as he looks up and see Cloud and Tifa staring down at him and Morrigan with disapproved looks on both their faces.
Morrigan: Oh my. Hello, there. (Turns to Dedede) Are they friends of yours, dear?
Dedede: (Quickly Turns Away) Nope. Never seen those two in all my life.
Cloud: Never seen those two my ass. (Marches Himself Over to Dedede) C'mere!
Dedede: What the- (Suddenly Gets Dragged Put if his Seat by Cloud Pulling his Ear Forward) AUGH! Let go boy! That's my good ear your pulling!! Hey!!
Tifa: (Politely Bows to Morrigan) We are terribly sorry about that, ma'am. He is most certainly with us. (Waves Goodbye While Following Behind the Others) Have a Merry Christmas!~
Morrigan: (Happily Waves Back) Likewise~ It was nice meeting you, Former King of Dreamland!~ (Giggles Properly)
Dedede: No, wait! Get me back there! I ain't done talking to her yet! At least let me give her phone number FIIIIRST!!
Cloud: Shut it, De!
Back at the Exotic Clothes Store
Lilith: So~ How's your family holiday going along so far?~
Daisy: Pretty good for the most part. We roamed around the city, saw the Christmas Parade, met the mayor who's.....(Leans Closer to Lilith and Place her Hand Beside her Ear with a Smirk onher Face) Get this: Peach's been jealous of the longest time now!~
Lilith: Oooooh!~ Scandalous!~
Daisy: (Snickers a Bit) It's more cute than anything. Especially when she tries so hard to hide it.
Lilith: (Giggles Softly) Aw~ I feel for her. Can't remember the last time I was ever jealous of something myself. (Turns to Luigi) What about you, sweetie?
Luigi: (Shrugs) I have a few jealousy moments I can of think, most of which involves me and my brother growing up. Ooh! Speaking of which, we're gonna visit our family after Christmas is over with. You're more than welcome to come along with us, but uh.....Fair warning, our folks can be real......(Takes a Deep Breath Before Speaking Again) REAL pain sometimes.....Mostly around me.......
Daisy: (Hugs her Man's Arm) Our poor baby's been stressing himself out about this since we first got here. (Starts Piuting at Him) After I specifically told him not to.
Luigi: ('Sigh') I knooow, but I can't help it! It's been years since we've all seen each other and everyone's expectations of me have been going haywire since the day Mario and I left on our own in the world. I just wanna make them proud and see me for who I am rather than being Mario's baby bro or worse, his shadow.....
Daisy: (Given Luigi's a Reassuring Smile on her Face) Hey, I have no doubt in my mind that they'll to be proud of you for what you've accomplished so far. (Points at Herself Confidently) And if they start getting doubtful, you bet your ass I'll be here to brag you every step of way!
Lilith: (Happily Joins in on the Luigi Hugfest) Me too!~ I wanna brag about how much of a total sweetheart you are to the both of us.
Luigi: (Chuckles Lightly) Thabks, girls, but you really don't have to go out of your way to do that for- (Suddenly Hears the Sounds of Screaming as He Turns to See a Crowd of People Running Outside with a Raised Eyebrow in Confusion) Me?
Daisy: The heck is going on out there?
Lilith: Don't know. Maybe the real Santa's here?
Daisy: Or the mayor. She's practically like a rockstar in this city.
Lilith: Make that a One-Hit Wonder. I don't think I ever heard her sing something other than "1-UP Gal" before..
Luigi: Maybe she never got the freetime to wrote new material.
Daisy: Yeah, maybe.
Meanwhile Back in the Mall..............
The crowd of people continues running straught through the area, looking aimlessly for the Mayor of New Donk City to perform for them once more. Unknowingly to them, the mayor in question has been hiding behind one of the three giant nutcrackers along with Pit and Sora.
Pauline: ...........Is the cost clear?
Sora: Hmm.....(Slowly Moves his Head Away From the Nutcracker to Watch the Crowd Continue Running From Afar) Yeeeup. They seem to be long gone for now.
Pauline: (Let's Out a Sigh of Relief as She Steps Out From One of the Nutcrackers) Oh Thank God....And here I thought they would never leave me be.
Pit: (Steps Out of the Other Nutcracker Along with Sora) There were so many of them out there.
Sora: Yeah, no fooling. But i wouldn'tsay it's too surprising. (Turns to Pauline With a Smile) This city does have a pretty cool mayor after all.
Pit: (Happily Nodded in Agreement) Definitely.
Pauline: (Smiles Sheepishly at the Duo's Comments) Oh you boys are too sweet~ But I'm pretty sure they only wanted me to give them an encore if anything....
Pit: Oh for that "1-UP Girl" song you did on the parade days ago?
Sora: (Gives Pauline a Thumbs Up) Very nice performance out there by the way, Mayor.
Pauline: (Bows Politely at Sora) Thank you. ('Sigh') But honestly, I think I'm starting to get real tired of singing that song as of late......
Sora: Is that so?
Pauline: (Simply Nodded) Its the truth. (Looks Up at the Glass Ceiling) I know it's practically the city's anthem at this point, but I've been more than ready to start new material for the longest time now. Wish I would have a lot more freetime to do so, but mayor work is hardly ever finished completely I'm afraid.....
Pit: (Gives Pauline a Reassuring Smile) I'm sure you'll get a longer break you deserve one of these days, Mayor. It just takes some time, you know?
Sora: (Happily Nodded in Agreement) Exactly. And we're sure that newer materials you'll be working on will sound just as amazing as the original.
Pauline: (Stares at the Duo For a Brief Second Before Smiling Back) Right. I'll continue to do my best to bring satisfaction to everyone as mayor and a performer. In the meantime, is there anything you two need in return for helping me just now, I'm happy to do it.....Just so long as it isn't anything illegal.
Pit/Sora: (Grabs Their Respective Chins While Thinking) Hmmmmm......
The duo huddle together to discuss their offer among themselves for a few seconds before separating and turning back to Pauline.
Pit: Actually~ If it won't be too much of a trouble for you......
Sora: We would really love it if you make a visit to the hotel lobby Christmas Morning. Maybe perform Christmas song or two for the occasion.
Pit: With our assistance maybe?~
The duo then rapidly blink their eyes with silly, puppy dog looks on each of their faces.
Pauline: (Giggles Softly) Very well!~ It would be my honor to perform a Christmas melody for you all.
Pit/Sora: (Pumps Their Fist Up in Rejoice) YES! Uh....('Clears Throat')
Pit: Glad we've reached a fruitful conclusion.
Sora: Yes. Super glad.
?????: Ohhh boys!~
The trio turns to see Viridi, Kairi and Riku making their way towards them.
Viridi: You two're not causing any trouble here, are you?
Kairi: ('Gasps') Oh my gosh! Mayor Pauline!
Riku: (Politely Bows at Pauline) It's so nice to properly meet you for the first time, ma'am.
Pauline: (Smiles at the Three) Likewise. I take you all are acquainted with these two?
Viridi: Yeah, they're our adorably obnoxious boyfriends we reluctantly fell in love with.
Sora/Pit: (Comically Glares at the Goddess of Nature) RELUCTANTLY!?
Viridi: Kidding, kidding. We fell in love with you guys wholeheartedly.....But you two are still equally obnoxious.
Sora/Pit: ARE NOT!!
Viridi: (Glares Back at the Boys) Are too. And quit yelling at the same time, unless you wanna prove my point even further!
The boys and Viridi starts arguing among each other in front of everyone else.
Pauline: (Turns to Kairi and Riku) You three must be really lucky to have those two in your lives right now, huh?
Kairi: (Smiles Softly) Oh you have no idea.
Riku: (Smiles Sheepishly) They are our Rays of Sunshine after all....
@cyber-wildcat
@caleb13frede
@albion-93
@theweebmaster31
@ma-lemons
#super smash ultimate#darkstalkers#fox mccloud#falco lombardi#samus aran#banjo#luigi#daisy#lilith aensland#king dedede#cloud strife#tifa lockhart#morrigan aensland#sora#pit#pauline#riku#viridi#kairi#new donk city adventures#humor#christmas month#cute romance#luigi x daisy x lilith
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https://www.tumblr.com/wolfboy-butch/745437590649520128/anyways-someone-should-feed-our-npd-and-ask-us
B in the tags is interesting because some other system clocked us as having a more anarchist system structure (<- we had not thought about this before!!!) and it feels like a lot of other systems who have more stratified systems are some form of Asshole, something we have figured out You Are Not so please tell us about that! We are begging you. We wish to understand others further whilst we're feeling good.
C in the tags is interesting because that feels so far beyond us it makes no sense and we literally just NEED to know more. If you're sapient and share our brain in our system you're a headmate and part if the system. We believe we have talked to one other system with a situation like Tag Option C but it wouldn't hurt to have the information.
~ Kirbopher (would it be better to use "Kirb" here so people know I'm a fictive/fucktive/not-the-guy-Im-sorry?????)
Hi thank you for sending! Now, warning, you have unlocked a Major rant, so readers beware, click the read more at your own discretion.
So basically, when we first became partitionary, we ended up in Madeline's (aka Aaron; he/him as Madeline and she/her as Aaron, not in a plural way but in a bigender anarchy way) house. We could not see outside of the windows of this house, it was basically just blank void to us, and us four ([original headmate with the IRL name we use, later forged with several others into Summer], Madeline, Cale, and Em) lived there.
Fast forward a month. A few new folks have joined in (Roman, Grimble, Shark), aaaaand they don't exactly want to live with us in the same house. Especially not Shark, since he was a semi-feral fish man who uh, needed water to live. Suddenly, we can see the beginnings of a town surrounding a lake.
Things grow from there. What we can see grows, the town grows, and there comes to be another fish man, Caspien, who makes the best god damn iced peach tea you've ever tried. He's mostly notable because the lake is later named after him, along with Another Thing that'll become clear later. Eventually, we begin to see the forest at the edge of our little town that we've built. Everything's cool. (Unfortunately, we don't have the map from this time--we know it existed at one point! But we can't find the file, nor can we find any remnants of it in the Discord servers we were in at the time that we might be able to use)
Then, uh-oh, April of 2021. System collapse. Down from 60 all the way to 15--including Summer, who becomes the new host. As if to put salt in the wound, what we can see expands, and we can now see the coast of the Wirshir'dauwn Sea, along with the edges of what we would later find out are two major mountain ranges.
Note: we aren't creating our headspace. We did not realize, at the time, that most systems created their headspace and didn't simply passively discover it in the same way they may discover old headmates.
Things regrow. Come late May, and the boundaries of what we can see stretch with the arrival of several new headmates at once: the Plainsmen. Unlike the small, incremental changes of before, this change is huge--we can now see double what we used to, it's all to the east, and it's all grassy plains and desert. This is what our map looks like at the time:
(Note: orange dots are settlements, don't recall grey dots are doors to the front room which was essentially a different realm we could enter via those doors, black lines are train lines, and the Winterdown Ocean is called that for a reason. You'll see.)
Now, here's the thing: the only people in the entire system who can go into the plains (as in, beyond the Barrier Mountains)... are the Plainsmen. Even as more headmates form. Our only way to communicate with them is through going to the front room, which is split into two, with a hallway between. We can't even go to their side of the front room without feeling dizzy and foggy. And this isn't a one-sided thing at all, they can't come to our side either!
Thankfully, we get to talk to them frequently, since the front room was the only way we could front at the time, we were in high school, and one of them--Gilan--was a god at badminton and so wanted to front constantly since that was the only thing we'd play in PE at the time.
Then comes along Carmen (zhe/zhem/zheir/zheirs). Who sorta... breaks everything. At first, we kind of just meme on zhem (from fantasy mid-1800s era England, scared of cars, etc), but then... zhe try crossing over to the Plainsmen's side of the front room, against everyone else's advice.
And zhe're completely fine. No ill effects. Zhe start talking to Gilan, they hit things off (and they both hit things off with another person, Jade, who was from our ex-partner system but now lives over here thanks to system hopping stuff), and eventually, zhe get dared to go out into the actual Plains. And Carmen, the bastard, agrees.
And not only are zhe fine, but zhe can still front. Outside of the front room.
And then we can find out zhe can teleport. What in the hell. Who are you. What the fuck.
Well, zhe decide to see if zhe can do something about the "no fronting unless in front room" thing, and zhe eventually end up developing crystals a la the crystals in Dimension20's Fantasy High. They're basically phones, but... rock. Which everyone now has. Carmen settles down by Overdeep Lake because zhe generally dislike people except for zheir partners. Things start to settle in, things get a bit more normal again...
Whoops! New headspace expansion, and not just that, we learn that we're not the only ones here, and uh. We're. Actually gateway. And the reason why our headspace was "passively expanding" instead of us building it was because the whole world already existed. And there were people there. There just weren't people in the area that we'd been settling, aside from in the towns in the Plains--but we'd just figured those were NPCs since we rarely interacted with them! Not full people! And we'd never heard anyone talking about this before, so what the hell is going on? The map now looks like this.
(Note: the mountains along the edge of the sea aren't actually mountains mountains, just cliffside. We weren't great at making maps at the time.)
So as it would turn out. "Winterdown" was a mistranslation/mishearing of Wirshir'dauwn. And Kingdom Omaude exists. And both of these places have their own cultures, languages, accents, etc. And apparently, Caspien was originally from Wirshir'dauwn, had heard of human (or, mostly human) settlement around the lake, and decided to check it out and just... never went back? Alright man, miss you, thanks for the iced peach tea, wish you'd taught someone how to make it properly before you disappeared in the system collapse but whatever, we're cool.
Okay. Okay! This is fine! Everything is fine. Carmen goes up to meet Queen Scethius (he/him) to explain things, and then they hit it off. Carmen had already adopted some kids, and this is where the joke that Carmen (who adopts every sad wet rat zhe see--zheir eldest's words, not mine) has more partners than kids starts to take off. Queen Scethius even sets aside a whole coat for zhem, how romantic.
And then we learn that this isn't it. We just haven't explored yet--because now that we've properly learned about Omaude and Wirshir'dauwn, it's not that the world around us is locked, it's just that we... need to explore more of it.
Blah blah blah, stuff happens, a revolt occurs against the monarchy in Kingdom Girun--Omaude's oldest enemy, historically--and now the folks running the place are generally cool. Carmen had already set up the Rangers in the Forebarrier, which isn't formally a country but still has a seat at the metaphorical table in the world stage now since... people actually live there now? And the Rangers basically just make sure everyone's doing okay, help distribute resources, mediate conflict, stuff like that. Carmen was voted to be the commandant, which basically just means zhe do the most paperwork and talk to the most people, and zheir best friend/subject of many inside jokes, Cordon, is zheir second. We learn about more and more nations and their cultures, and eventually, the map looks like this.
"Where's Wirshir'dauwn?" you ask. Here's the thing: Wirshir'dauwn was a kingdom. Which we hadn't known before. The ocean itself is called Daerk'shyen, and many more people live there! The Great Divide is basically a massive set of mountain ranges and canyons that are largely considered impassable, except for a few things.
Also note: "Tetutlen" is a typo, it's actually Tetlunen. Didn't notice that until just now. Whoops. Also, City Toelit was a former state of Girun, but split off somewhere to the tune of a few hundred years ago due to the corrupt monarchy? But now that things have switched up and stuff is much more democratic, there's debate on whether or not they want to rejoin Girun. Note: Girun and City Toelit are both mostly occupied by elves, who live hundreds of years already.
And, aside from the Shakening n' Quakening [SNQ] (which split up the world into a bunch of floating islands--no clue why or how it happened, not even the Gods know, some suspect it might have been discourse between the Ancients, which are basically the gods of the Gods; we get around both by the magic Saltrock Express (still exists! Still around!) and via sky ships, with there being an official Sky Rider League in the Forebarrier, which is mostly made up of Rangers and heavily tied to them but aren't actually part of the Rangers), that's... basically what our map looks like now. The world is called... several different things depending on the nation, of course, but we in the Forebarrier and Plains call it Yhine, and the continent--since the SnQ--is called [the] Archidivum.
What we suspect happened is that the brain basically latched onto a particular realm, and that realm became an anchor for the colony. As we grew and as our needs shifted and changed, the amount that was "unlocked" for us--as the brain latched more and more onto the world--grew and changed with us, until eventually, it got to the point where we were no longer the only ones we could talk to/no longer the only ones we knew of who had major influence over the world we were in and now part of.
As for why certain folks don't consider themselves part of the collective even if they front, it's mostly cases like General Fenityr (he/him, ze/zim/zyr/zyrs), who is the head of the military in Omaude. He's been around for somewhere to the tune of 650 years, has been a political figure in Omaude for around 400 of them, basically raised Queen Scethius, yadda yadda.
In recent times, though, he's gotten more familiar with the Colony, and even got married to Ramses (one of Carmen's kids, also a former member of that same ex-partner system in the same way Jade (who, along with Gilan, married Carmen) is--they both moved over here (with permission) to be with the people they married, and to hopefully avoid getting accidentally erased, since our collective--post April 2021--was a lot more stable than the ex's and was/is a lot less prone to collapses, resets, etc). Ze's close with Carmen's family (especially since Carmen is also married to Scethius. "Carmen has more partners than kids" blah blah) and would front pretty frequently to talk to Ramses back before Ramses moved over here. So what gives on the whole "not being part of the collective" thing?
Well, one of the biggest reasons ze doesn't consider zyrself as part of the colony is because ze's basically guaranteed to outlive it, and ze's still beholden to the whims of the world ze lives in and not the whims of the brain in which the Colony occupies. Not to mention, ze lived for centuries longer than the Colony had even existed, and grew up entrenched in the cultures of Girun (having originally lived there for around about 160, 170 years) and Omaude (where he eventually settled permanently). While he can front, and he is friends with folks in the Colony, he doesn't consider himself as part of it because he, first and foremost, is attached to and part of and from Girun, Omaude, the Archidivum, and Yhine as a whole in a way that we, the Seal Colony, just... aren't. Just because we're anchored here doesn't mean we're natives of the place the same way they are (with few exceptions, mostly very young kids who arrived in the Colony at the age of 3 or younger who've never known different.)
(Or folks like Carmen. Or, really, just Carmen. Remember how I said zhe can teleport? Zhe also have a bunch of other abilities that zhe flat out should not be able to have and should not have been able to have since the beginning. Also, zhe're friends with at least one of the Gods of Yhine and has generally gained the Gods' favor. So zhe're just. Yeah.)
#it's me#plurality#asks#anendoandfriendo#also the reason why the Forebarrier wasn't inhabited was because (A) none of the closest western countries could make it over the Great--#--Divide (at lesat not without contest from Omaude (*cough cough* Girun *cough*); the Plains wasn't very developed beyond those few small--#--towns; and Omaude (our closest neighbor) wasn't suuuper interested in taking the land since they already had a Massive territory to manag#not to mention Girun (terrible at the time) to their west constantly threatening them + Tetlunen to the east being. well. not *exactly*--#--friendly. they've managed to ally recently but there were A Few Skirmishes here and there#so Omaude's resources were already pretty taken up#also according to some of the more religious there was some potential magic- and god-related fuckery as to why people didn't enter the--#--area but Β―\_(γ)_/Β―#there Are also other known continents but we know Nothing about them#including reportedly a potential continent that's more industrialized than we are?#a third down south that's very icy and cold and one of the last bastions of old-style magic (aka god power aka powers Gifted By Gods--#--passed down family lines. there's some theories that Carmen's ability comes from zhem somehow having unlocked this but we have no idea--#--How zhe would have done that)#and then a fourth that we Think is just plainly on the other side of the world. there's at least one dragon person there. cher name is--#--Sherui and uhhh come to think of it we have had no contact from cher in a while. should probably check up on cher
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Iron Flame: A Prelude, Romance Edition
Dear Aliya,
I am VIBRATING out of my SKIN.
So, Iron Flame releases soon and I am highly excited, as is everyone! But with that excitement comes ever so slight fear. A lot has been said about the main leads of the book Violet and Xaden being in such a good (good???) place in their relationship so early on in the series. Why? Well, when you're promised a slow burn enemies to lovers and those enemies are already lovers in a five-book series you can't help but wonder if the fire we saw burning was the wrong fire. We can comfortably say that the enemy in question is probably not Jack, which I can absolutely live with, but that then leaves us a few options.
Shall we dot point?
Xaden Riorson What's he doing here? A fair question, I am sincerely hoping that in her anger Violet is counting him as her enemy once again. It'll take a lot of winning her over, but I think our guy can do it! I am cheering in the bleachers for our resident shadow daddy to pull himself up by the bootstraps and win his girl back.
And, we're in the lead gang! We know their dragons are mated, which puts us... uh... Xiolence (we'll workshop) fans in a pretty good position and let's be real, Xaden confessed that he'd been in love with Violet for a long time.
In saying that, I can think of a handful of other male love interests that were this deeply in love and it took them right off the deep end. I can't tell if it's the author hammering us over the head that he's still very in love with her or if he's turning into a man possessed with lust.
See where the stress comes from?
Dain Aetos This guy again. Look, I don't love the situation on our hands here but I've since taken a closer look. He's fitting enemies to lovers at the moment as well as childhood friends, I don't think Dain has dropped out of the race just yet. Violet has given him second and third chances, a fourth is not out of the question.
The only issue I can see is that he's a mind reader and a snitch in a world where Violet now has the biggest secret ever.
Oh, and he's a dick, so two issues.
A secret third option I've been shaking my brain like a snowglobe to watch all the brain cells swirl around for a thought and I've managed to have one. We know the Gryphon riders aren't the bad guys, Violet might need just a biiiiiiit more convincing. You know who might be the one to convince her? Whatever Gryphon rider is feeling up to the task to try and romance the girl with the dragon tattoo (and silver hair).
It's not quite enemies, but I've read stories where the enemies in question were less enemies and more two people who didn't like each other for a hot second so we seem to just be slapping the label on any old ship dynamic.
Ah well, just a few more days and we'll have a whole book to inhale and discuss further!
Nothing more comes to mind, so I appreciate you listening to my thoughts. Iβll see you next time, stay well!
Hannah xx
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tell us about riz (ask game)
RIZ RIZ RIZ BET
first impression: oh this boy has so much frantic energy omg and cares so much about this penny girl he tries so hard, hes completely not sleeping to find his only friend...... Fuck I'm gonna end up kinning this guy, aren't I. And then it just kept going
impression now: ...... he cares. so. much. i care so much. its everything and he is everything to me- i actually dont know how to express it. he's like- holy. literally, he works for heaven now. but thats not important, he is.
Favorite moment....... fuck.... hmm... god i really like his interactions with Kalina. it could be "hiss at her, litigator!" followed by him hissing in court, but thats more a fig thing so.... while its not necessarily the moment, i like what it came to mean for his character. Him stuck in the palimpsest at the arcade, having lost to Penny's game, cutting his hands digging through the crystals, simply because that is so often referred back to
HONORABLE MENTIONS BECAUSE HES MY LITTLE GUY AND FUCK IT WE BALL: "i'm really gonna spiral here" after getting his own private office to do pi shit in, him suggesting "we can throw rocks in the river" as a hangout option because his only experience with what hangouts are like comes from violent productive adventuring and also noir mystery films/books/games, Riz inventinting the Night Yorb because he couldnt just relax. HIM TALKING TO HIS MOM ABOUT LIKE- IDFK WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF OR HOW TO INTERACT WITH MY FRIENDS IF THERES NOT A PROBLEM I CAN SOLVE- like shoot me with a fucking gun why dont you- uhhhhhh... "its just a metal tube. i think its beautiful *and then i do a little dance*" ..... theres a lot imma shut up
Story idea....... shit- him hanging out with the seven. please. idk, im very content with my- WAIT NO i wouldnt write about him, but any fanfic where he interacts with jawbone(like as the guidance counselor, not as the dad of most of his friends) - head in hands-
unpopular opinion: shipping fabriz is fine. like i dont like it and any ship stuff for them i read(which i do read) i am personally interpreting as platonic cuz im really good at that, or unrequited. i know a lot of people get pressed about it cuz aroace erasure which yeah if youre changing him to demi thats a bit- or if its one of those "Pok was right, he might just be a late bloomer, lol theyre aged up and actually riz finds out he's pan lololol" thats a bit - like please stop. but if hes dating the guy as an aroace person or theyre qpring. whats the big deal. i know riz doesnt want a relationship and all but - that the point of shipping? like i know for some people its uncomfy especially with how its the most popular d20 ship(at least based on ao3), but to me its like- shipping is literally pushing together characters and its always purely self indulgent??? like ship whoever you want as long as he stays aroace. anyways i didnt need to justify myself and show both arguements like that. none of you know this guy. except two people hi eni and aether
favorite relatioship: ..... LISTEN IGNORE EVERYTHING I JUST SAID. FABIAN AND RIZ THEY ARE BEST FRIENDS FABIAN SEACASTER AND THE FUCKING BALL LIKE THEYVE COME SO FAR IN THEIR DYNAMIC ITS CHANGED SO MUCH - theyre so opposites theyre everything theyre everything THEY SHOULDNT BE FRIENDS! AND THEYRE NOT!! THEYRE BEST FRIENDS!!!! AUGH!!!
favorite headcanon: autistic and anxious...... uh..... my brain is very gone... i think he still has like a bunch of different friendship bracelets from Penny that he keeps in like little collectors cases. ALSO I DONT THINK SHE EVER GAVE THEM TO HIM I THINK THEY WOULD JUST LIKE APPEAR ON HIS WRIST SHE WAS SLEIGHT OF HANDING THOSE SHITS ONETO HIS WRISTS BECAUSE HE COMPLAINED IT DIDNT MATCH HIS AESTHETIC AND THEN SHED LEAVE AND HE BE LIKE- im gonna frame this and put in on my wall.... but like as in in a false bottom in a drawer so its cooler
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Good morning!! πͺΉ and β‘οΈ for the weather asks?
Thank you for these!!
Question list here
πͺΉΒ DroughtΒ - What do you do to help with Writer's Block?
(idk why the emoji isn't showing up on my desktop π€·ββοΈ hope that's not the case for others)
After many, many years of writing, I have come to the conclusion "writer's block" is a deceptive name for "burn out." I have never once been "blocked" when excited by a new idea, or have the time and the mental energy to dedicate to a project. I have been blocked when stressed out and overworked, or coming off of having to bang out a ton of papers at the end of a semester, or because I've been staring at the same WIP every day for the last five years.
The worst writing advice I got in school, the one they will try to hammer into you over and over, is that you should be writing every day of your life. Not only is this advice false, it is dangerous. I firmly believe aside from eating, drinking, sleeping and maybe bathing, there is literally nothing you need to be doing every day until you die. (I mean, I guess parenting maybe, but eventually kids will be old enough to take care of themselves for a day or two.)
I got into this horrible shame spiral if I did not write every single day, regardless of how many jobs I was working, or how much stress or anxiety I had going on in my life, I was a horrible failure as a writer and I'd never amount to anything and blah blah blah. And it's just... too much. It's too fucking much.
So if I'm well and truly blocked, and the words just aren't coming, I rest. I do something else. Maybe I write something else. This is why I have ended up with a ton of WIPs lol - I realized I will write far more if I have several projects I can juggle than if I have The One Project That Must Be Finished or Else... or else what? Nothing, that's what. You're just making yourself feel guilty for no reason. Especially if you are writing for a hobby, nothing you're writing ever needs to be finished. If you're just practicing and noodling around with ideas, that's okay! Who cares? You can finish it when you feel like it! You're not on the clock! There's no algorithm you need to feed to get paid! Removing a capitalist mindset from writing (assuming you aren't immediately being paid to write the thing) helped my actual writing IMMENSELY.
β‘οΈLightningΒ - Have you ever spontaneously added something to your story that you wouldn't have added normally? If so, what made you do it?
Oh God NGL that's like 90% of the things I write. I'm really into "what if" ideas. I chase those plots like mad. I have one that hit me this morning while half asleep and I might write it today instead of finishing this nightmare au chapter. Maybe I'll do both if I have time, IDK.
Even if I have things vaguely planned most of the time I am just writing scenes to see what happens. So if something comes up organically I am far more likely to say "huh, okay, let's see how I can incorporate this into the story" than I am to say, nuh uh, get out. I think stories are better for this sort of innovation. I know everyone is in a moral panic about AI lately, but I truly believe stuff like this is what will always separate human creativity from machines. The AI is doing predictive text, trying to guess things based on stuff that's already been done a million times. If you get a weird flash of inspiration but you think it's out of "the norm" β I tend to find that's the real visionary stuff that comes out of writing. I'm not into leaning into the bland, formulaic options. That will just convince the corporate overlords there IS no difference between human creativity and AI.
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Alright, here we go, Archon Alyx's big 10th ed Drukhari review! I will avoid going over things we didn't already know about from the faction focus.
Starting off, of course, with the Archon.
Interesting stuff, now every Drukhari list gets Agents of Vect by default which imo is awesome, esp since it means our choices aren't exactly limited when we will always have access to Vect as an ability no matter what detachment we choose. Streamlined weapon options and a buffed huskblade is nice to see especially since people *only ever ran the Djin Blade anyways*. The leader ability is really good too for reasons I'll go over later. However I'm slightly disappointed by one thing.
Of course court of the archon and kabalites make sense as attachable units, but I'm curious why not Incubi? in 9th archons *specifically* buffed incubi as well as Kabal units and archons and incubi often hang out in battle. I was thinking that Incubi would be a potential unit for an archon to lead (especially with that juicy full reroll to wound while empowered combined with alliance of agony) but this is all fair and good.
Moving on down, we've got kabalites and OH BOY did they buff kabalites.
We already saw their profile and ability from the faction focus (8" move buff and sticky objectives while in transports, very juicy) but there's two huge things to note here. They took away MSU kabalites, but in exchange, you can take *all 4 special/heavy weapons*. With the buffs to dark lances, shredders finally being a flamer, and splinter cannons gaining sustained hits (not even mentioning the buff to poison to a 3+), kabalites are now back to being quite a threat. Combine this with the venom combat squads, and you see where this is going. special and heavy weapons riding around with an archon in a venom, the other 5 fellas to sit on a backfield objective or otherwise screen. Beautiful. Absolutely fantastic. Bringing back venom heavy shooting drukhari could be both a good and a bad thing but I am personally an enjoyer of that playstyle.
Moving along swiftly to my Best Boy, Drazhar
Honestly I don't have much to say, losing the -1 damage ability is fair enough, considering most things have (my least favourite common mechanic from 9th) but most importantly, he's lost his fight twice, in exchange for a very interesting ability. I don't know how good it'll be honestly, but Drazhar has always excelled at character assassination anyways so it could be good. He's the only character that leads Incubi and he buffs them nicely so I will continue taking him myself.
Speaking of incubi, I am deeply saddened.
They got completely gutted. Base 5++ is nice, don't get me wrong, but they lost +1 damage on 6s to wound, they lost fight last in exchange for battle shock (which is fine tbh) and most importantly, *they lost 2+ WS base*. MY BOYS HIT ON 3s!!!!! Their presence in 9th was honestly quite heavy so I expected a nerf but this? this seems like a lot. I'll still run them because they are just tough beatsticks that are great for throwing at anything important (especially with Drazhar in tow and being empowered) or to mince heavy infantry, but they really took a big hit.
On to covens!
First up, Urien.
Minor spoiler, we're in for another covens heavy edition, so get those grotesque STL files ready to print (please give us plastic grots) and uh. I guess none of use put our Talos away since they've been pretty core for the past 2 editions. Urien here is almost certainly a must take imo, as you will all see, haemys lost their healing, so Urien is gonna be our only healing. But boy does he heal. Flat 3 wounds or flat 3 wracks back? Yes please! Alongside his casket which is a 3d6 flamer with devastating wounds for the potential to spike an *unholy* amount of mortal wounds if the rolls hit. He doesn't give buffs to the unit he's attached to but wracks have always been screening and objective sitting units anyways, so the only reason you'd attach him to wracks is to keep him from being shot. Also he's still got his Celestine revive which is fun.
Base haemonculus' now!
Their profiles are nothing fancy (I'm too lazy to go screenshot it) but key thing to note is they can also only be attached to wracks. A bit of a disappointment for sure, I had visions of a haemonculus with a huge blob of grots all getting buffed from alliance of agony, but considering the haemy's leader buff, I think it's fair (4+ FNP for the unit). If these fellas are cheap, with the new way army's are made, I imagine we might see two or three of these guys running around with blobs of wracks to sit on objectives and be nigh impossible to move without some serious focus fire. I did say we were in for a covens heavy edition!
Speaking of wracks.
Would've been cool if they had sticky objectives but I guess kabalites already took that spot. Don't know how useful that ability is going to end up being I'll be honest, wracks aren't exactly the most aggressive unit and with the haemy's buff I expect they'll be doing the same as they always do: screening and holding objectives. Not much else of note.
Here's the big one. Talos engine.
Holy Vect. What an ability. *Permanent empowerment*. The sheer amount of value there is immense. And, as teased in the faction focus, those haywire blasters are looking devious. Interesting to note that ichor injectors are no longer free mortals, so I imagine we'll either see macro scalpel chain flail return, or twin liquifier gauntlet as the weapon combos. Interested to see what people end up taking for the ranged weapon, whether the haywire blaster will be enough of a threat or the more consistent damage and strength of the heat lances will prevail. We'll have to see what top drukhari players take to the first major 10th tournaments to really know but I think I'm in favour of haywire and twin liquifier gauntlet for my Talos. And once again. *permanent empowerment*. Always rerolling to hit, always rerolling to charge. Ridiculous value.
Next up on the coven essentials, grots!
No more split between gauntlets and liquifiers! Now we just get one profile (decent tbh) *and* they can all take liquifier guns. Not much else to say they're mostly the same. Except, what's this? 4+ fight on death? as an *ability*? Not even a single CP spent for it either? So, not only are grotesques hard to kill, decently hard hitting against heavy/elite infantry and huge screens, they now also fight on death. *Yet another covens edition it is*.
I can't add anymore photos on mobile so I'm going to call this part one and do the Cults in a part two as a reblog, not much to say about them though so it'll be short.
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When I'm Not With You I Feel Awful
masterlist | part two
Yuuji Itadori x f!reader (a lil Gojo x reader too)
Genre: Smut & Angst Notes: hope ur all ready for an emotional ride!! (friends to lovers type beat) Warnings: 18+, pining, masturbation, noncon listening, voyeurism??, degradation, fingering, vaginal sex, depression, signs of mental illness, self loathing, cheating mention, daddy kink, jealousy. Words: 3.2k
Synopsis: Emotions aren't an option, but self destructing is. Yuuji Itadori is keeping everything to himself, while you are painting on a smile and pretending you're fine. Nothing is fine. Which one of you will admit it first?
spotify playlist if u wanna :P
Loving you feels like holding your breath. Yuuji canβt remember the last time he knew how to breathe comfortably and calmly. Twelve years. Itβs been twelve years since he met you and he thinks he has loved you every single second since. How he lived without you, heβll never know. How does he live with you now? He doesnβt, he isnβt breathing. He thinks it feels like gluing together pieces of a shattered vase. He looks okay, he looks normal enough. But heβs empty; only because he thinks thatβs how he must be. If you were to pour water into a broken vase, liquid would still pour from the cracks. And that is how he feels. If he admits to himself aloud how he feels about you, heβd begin to pour and pour. And heβd tell you, too. How can he continue to keep it to himself if heβs pouring? Keeping the love he feels for you to himself is an impossibility. And you canβt know, ever. You donβt belong to him, youβre someone elseβs love, and it kills him. So, he must remain empty. He doesnβt want to ruin your relationship. He doesnβt want to ruin your friendship. He doesnβt want to ruin anything. But, those are just excuses. He could easily tell you, the subsequent response would allow him to know how to proceed with his existence. The truth is simple.
Thereβs only one reason Yuuji Itadori canβt tell you how he feels.
Itβs because heβs a coward.
Even after twelve years he thinks you have the sweetest face heβs ever had the honour to witness. Your face has matured. The once smooth, full cheeks that belonged to an eleven-year-old girl have somehow become softer and sophisticated. Whenever heβd pinch your cheeks, heβd always laugh at the way youβd pout and tell him itβs βbaby fatβ.
You donβt say that, anymore.
Early evening is his favourite time of day. Those are the times you stop by the convenience store he works in after you finish your own day of work. A weathered satchel clasped between manicured fingers while you smile heartily at him. You live a few doors apart from each other in the same apartment complex; it makes sense to walk home together whenever you get the chance.
Itβs his favourite time of day, because heβll never forget the day you told him the orange sky from the golden hour of the day melting into pink reminds you of him. His hair. And, his smile.
Do you think of his smile as often as he thinks of yours?
He remembers himself as he nears your apartment. Why would you think of his smile when you have a boyfriend of your own? He imagines that you like to see him happy, to see him smiling, but he doubts that you get the same butterflies he gets when your entire face softens beneath the evening sky. He wants to know what you really think of the sky. Is it a good thing that you are reminded of him at this time of day? He longs to know the significance, the reason that you chose to tell him so many years ago now.
βThe skyβ¦ itβs, uh, really pretty tonight.β he stammers, instantly regretting that he decided to open his mouth to speak. Who cares if the sky is pretty? Heβs certain that you donβt. He can see it in the way your brows furrow as you deign to finally look up from your phone. His vision is filled with the sight of you consuming your surroundings. The way the pinks and oranges of the summer sky dance in your perfect, glittering eyes. His heart beats a little faster as a smile, a little, cheeky smile, works its way onto your face.
Does this sky still remind you of him?
βYeahβ¦ I suppose it does,β you agree, βitβs lovely, Yuuji.β
He looks away, biting his lower lip and closing his eyes. Heβs filled with hurt and heartbreak as a new reality set in. Why did he have to say that to you tonight? He clears his throat and forces a false smile onto his own face. He canβt allow you to suspect that there is something wrong, although, your nose is back in your phone so you likely wouldnβt have noticed anyway. He canβt take this. One of his precious memories is ruined from this point onwards. All because his mouth decided to run faster than his brain could ever hope to catch up to.
You donβt remember anymore.
The sky⦠this sky, no longer reminds you of him.
βThanks for walking me home, Iβll see you tomorrow.β you tell him, offering a meek wave before closing the door in his face. He barely gets a chance to spit out the word βbyeβ before he hears the lock to your apartment sound.
He hates how desperate he is. How needy he is for you and you alone. It wouldnβt matter if he actually sought the attention and companionship of another woman, there is no one else for Yuuji Itadori but you.
Itβs almost like an addiction, a compulsion, to think about you and ignore every other aspect of his life. Friends he had have become acquaintances as he slowly began to isolate himself from people he once cared about.
No parents.
No friends.
Just you.
And yet, he doesnβt even have you. Not really. Does he?
He is depressed, although heβd never realise. He doesnβt leave his house apart from when he needs to. Like, when you need him to. And of course, work. His apartment is a disgrace because all he does is sit and wallow in darkness. It was nice of you to buy him a record player and some albums for Christmas a few years ago, so he has some soundtracks to play along to his spiralling mental state.
He's happy as long as you are happy, so he canβt be depressed. He is in love with your smile and itβs contagious. He lives for you, worships you, youβre all he thinks about. And that makes him happy.
Itβs been three hours since he walked you home and he has done nothing but curl into bed from the minute he walked into his place. Subtract an occasional toilet break, he has been scrolling through his photo gallery on his phone the whole time. He cries happy tears when he sees videos of you together where youβre laughing and smiling.
There are others there, too, like Megumi and Nobara. But his mind can only process the sight of you. Youβre ethereal to him. How are you real? He would go to the ends of the earth to make you his, he thinks.
βP-Pleaseβ¦β he shivers, softly beneath his duvet, βI need you,β he whispers. Tears begin to flow from his tired eyes. Completely overwhelmed by his infatuation. He needs to hold it together; he canβt say those dangerous three words that will lead to the demise of your friendship. Itβs all he has. All he has in this entire world is the blessing that you have deemed him worthy of the title of best friend. He wishes for more, but heβs happy with what heβs got. Your happiness above all else; even his own damn sanity.
He can feel his heart pounding. Itβs obvious his body is gearing up to uncontrollably sob. The words are coming, he canβt stop it. He wants to punch himself in the most violent way possible to force the words back inside of him. Once itβs out there, itβs all over. Of this, he is sure.
But he canβt.
He canβt.
He canβtβ
βI loveββ
He freezes when his phone begins to ring, almost letting it fall from his hand in terror. But instantly, he is relaxed, your contact photo filling up the entirety of his screen. The apples of his cheeks redden as he remembers the day he set that picture; you were furious. How you could look at yourself and think the word ugly was beyond him. Yuuji thinks youβre heaven sent, too beautiful to be a human among other mere mortals. You were an angel, to him, you had to be.
He presses the green button and loosens his jaw to speak. Maybe you want him to come over to hang out, to unwind. It isnβt an unusual request; he spends a lot of his evenings over at your place. But he thought you would have done it sooner than now. He stops himself from speaking, however, when he hears a loud thud from the other end of the phone. Has someone broken into your apartment? His question is answered when the sound is followed by soft breaths and sticky lips meeting through the speaker. Andβ
βMmm, Satoru, I- I love you Satoru,β you murmur, before your breath is stolen from you again as your boyfriendsβ lips encase yours.
He wants to hang up. He wants to smash his phone against the God damn wall, but he canβt. Yuujiβs eyes close and he imagines as if you said his name rather than the name of your boyfriend. It sounds so nice, so warm. Like everything in his life is finally slotting into place. But then, the false reality is snatched from him.
βYeah? Iβm sure you do, sweetheart.β Gojo replies before kissing you again. A spit bubble is left on your mouth as he pulls away from your swollen lips to look at you intently. βOr do you just love daddyβs cock, hmm? Beinβ so sweet because you know Iβm going to fuck you senseless soon. Like the little slut you are.β
Yuuji quickly muted his microphone as he began to breathe erratically. He wanted to march down to your apartment and pull him away from you for speaking to you so degradingly. He can feel his eyes begin to swell the more tears he sheds, and heβs crying more because he canβt believe that you like being spoken to like that. He hates himself, because he canβt deny the way his cock stiffens at the lewd conversation and the erotic sounds spilling down the line.
He canβt touch himself, can he?
Over his clothes is okay. Thatβs allowed, he thinks. It isnβt so wrong. He can just pretend there is an unbearable itch he is attempting to scratch. It isnβt too terribly far from the truth. But he realises heβs beyond help when what he can only assume is Satoruβs fingers dip between your sticky panties and play with your clit. Your moaning becomes louder and louder, and your words are naughtier and naughtier. Yuujiβs pants are off, his eyes are closed, the room is still pitch dark as he fucks his bare cock into his fist whilst he imagines itβs all for him. He feels horrible, he feels sick at himself, but he canβt help it. This is likely to be the only time he gets to hear you like this and itβs so perfect because he can pretend youβre doing it all for him. And, youβll never have to know about any of it. Heβll feign ignorance if you do realise. There are no grounds for you to believe the man who adores you and dotes on you like nobody else, would lie to you.
βF-Faster, please, g-go faster!β you mewl, so he does. Gojo fingers you faster as Yuuji quickens the movement of his fist. Heβs crying, still, because itβs such a beautiful betrayal. Youβre practically in his ear moaning your wants and he canβt recall the last time he felt such genuine happiness. Itβs better than porn. Itβs better than anything. Heβll spend hours a day on Pornhub searching for videos with girls who look like you and itβs never good enough. Itβs going to be even harder, now, since heβs practically had the real thing.
He cums, hard, with gritted teeth and grunting moans as his cock spurts hot cream all over his abdomen. Heβs thankful, really, that it wasnβt the real thing. He came so quickly he would have been so humiliated if this had been your first time together.
This is your only time together.
He takes you off speaker, plugging in his AirPods so he can do other tasks before he sees himself to bed. He wants to hear it all. Itβs killing him to hear it, but he canβt waste this chance.
He cleans his teeth as he listens to you slobber all over Gojoβs cock, deepthroating him like a champ. Thatβs what Gojo hummed, anyway. Gojo is just as cocky and loud as he would have expected. Heβs a bastard in real life who never knows when to shut his mouth. Why would his bedroom antics be any different? Especially since youβre inflating his ego at least ten times what it already is.
Yuuji finds a face mask you bought him a few months ago while he listens to you arrive at the big finale. Hips slamming against each other while you moan uncontrollably. He thinks you might be faking it. But what would he know? Gojo is grunting just as loudly too, completely lost in the feeling of your heat taking him so perfectly.
He stares at himself in the mirror as he applies the green, avocado smelling substance to his face. Itβs colder than he expected. You begged him to use it when you had a sleepover all of those weeks ago, but he refused. He smiles as he remembers you telling him to at least take it home and give it a try in private. You must have thought he was worried about you taking pictures and uploading them to social media for the world to see. He didnβt care about that. He only cares what you think, after all.
By the time he hears you begging to be filled with Gojoβs cum, the mask has almost fully hardened on his face. He waits a little longer, though, he canβt bear to miss out the ending. He canβt help but touch the dried patches on his face with a curious glare.
What exactly is this supposed to do, anyway?
He washes it all off after he hears the two of you climax together. Itβs so romantic. He hates himself; he hates everything about his life and the fact that it wasnβt him you were having sex with at that very moment.
βI love youβ¦β he hears. His face is dripping with warm water, a few tips of his peachy locks had become drenched and were showering cold droplets onto his cheeks. They were mixing with tears, fresh ones that he could do nothing to prevent.
Pretending is all he has. This may be the final push for him to realise everything isnβt what it should be. Your relationship. His behaviour. His mental health. Yuuji holds a warm towel against his sodden face. And he cringes, he physically cringes as he hums into the black, fibred material.
βI love you.β he responds. And he grimaces. Not only because itβs finally out in the open. The truth he has locked away inside himself for twelve long years has finally been freed from his aching lungs and bleeding heart. But because the words tumbled from his lips at exactly the same time as they left Gojoβs. They spoke in unison. They told you in unison, but you only heard the one who mattered to you most speak.
Yuuji hangs up the phone, exhaling sorrowfully. Itβs really out there.
He loves you. It has felt like a lifetime to get to this moment, to reach this embarrassing confession, but there was no way he could keep it to himself a second longer. Look what heβs done. Look what heβs done to you, just to feel an inch closer to you in this mile of separation.
Even if you did leave Gojo, how could he expect to begin a relationship with you when he knew such a sickening truth? He completely violated your privacy, and he could never confess that to you. Never.
He huffs out an exhale as he lies on his back and stares up into the hideous popcorn ceiling above him. Even in a room plunged in darkness, itβs telling how prominent each bump and crack is that he can still see it with only the night sky offering any light to his room. But perhaps heβs being harsh and directing his frustrations on something so meaningless to mask his disgust with himself. His eyes close firmly, heβs aggravated. Sleep will offer no reprieve, either. He sees you everyday and you run through his mind each night. Youβre in his dreams, too.
The apple picking dream is recurring, and itβs his favourite.
He wakes up, groggy, disappointed. The beloved apple picking dream didnβt come to fruition. It was a friendly dream, instead. He was at work, like he will be soon, and you came to visit. Just a normal, bog-standard dream. You bought a few things; he thinks he remembers seeing strawberry bubble gum and strawberry laces.
Heβll have to remember to buy you some today for when you finish work.
Theyβre the first thing he grabs when he gets to work, paying for them and shoving them into his backpack. The end of the day canβt come soon enough. Heβs tired of seeing the same miserable faces and hearing the same pointless complaints. People expect too much, he thinks. He works in the most generic as you can get convenience store. Does anything really matter?
The end of the workday sneaks up on him, and heβs a little alarmed that you arenβt here yet. Youβre usually here while he has thirty minutes left to spare of his shift. The time goes a lot faster when youβre here. Itβs fun, he laughs, and before he knows it, youβre walking home together again. So why arenβt you here yet?
His concerns are answered when he spots your satchel through the window before he even sees your face. But then, he looks into your eyes as you open the door. Itβs been a while since heβs seen you look so upset. Your makeup is a little out of place and your eyes are puffy. His are, too, he thinks he cried enough to solve droughts in several countries last night.
You donβt notice his swollen stares, but itβs the first thing he sees on you.
βHey, whatβs wrong?β he asks, taking off his apron and moving to the other side of the counter. He holds your shoulders and his heart winces as he watches your lips suck into your mouth as you try and hold it together. But you canβt, you canβt. And that fact is made clear as tears start to slither down your cheeks. βYouβre scaring me. Whatβs happened?β he questions again, urging you to confide in him.
You do your best to pull yourself together. Forming an βoβ shape with your lips and exhaling harshly. Your breath fans across his chest before you look up and into his eyes. He gulps, dangerously, the sound reminds him too much of your accidental phone call last night. His eyes begin to vibrate, still awaiting an answer. His eyes are saying please, you canβt keep it inside, you need to tell him.
βItβs Gojo,β you start, βheβs been cheating on me.β
Β© 2021 fuwushiguro
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Well, while you're on a roll... Charlie? Less populated, but greater distribution! Would all of them perform an intervention on May Be Bad and Wake Myself, or would some of them be jealous and want a tell all?
I think we really only have three Charlies, right? *checks notes* Four, he does show up in She Says Love, so we'll make it an even battle.
Pool side, plastic chairs settled in a too close circle. Arrayed behind Mainverse is the suggestion of a dozen other chairs, other Charlies who never make it on screen, but may live in shades between these four.
There is a definite two on two air to the whole thing.
Mainverse *has the agenda*: So.
She Says Love: Can we just put it on the table? Because those two do not look like us.
Mainverse: Yeah, okay, what the hell is up with this?
Mainverse and She Says Love are dressed in distinctly relaxed clothing. Loose shorts, worn t-shirts. Wake Myself and May Be Bad are in tailored, expensive looks with a lot more care taken with their still close cut hair. Maybe Be Bad is in gray, Wake Myself is in deep jewel tones and has on a hint of eyeliner.
May Be Bad: *heavy judgement* I think we just have taste.
Wake Myself: We haven't been in college for four years, what is with the look?
Mainverse: It's comfortable.
Wake Myself: It's embarrassing, is what it is. Unless that's Iz's shirt. I do like to steal those.
May Be Bad: ....that's an option? Got to get on that.
She Says Love: Why would you be stealing Izzy's clothes? He's like six inches shorter than us.
Wake Myself: Husband privileges.
The other three go silent.
Wake Myself: What?
Mainverse: You...you're married to Izzy?
Wake Myself: You're not?
May Be Bad: I'm pretty sure Lucius would make my balls into a necklace, holy shit dude. *holds up hand for a high five which Wake Myself confusingly gives him*
Wake Myself: I mean, angel likes to hang with us?
Mainverse: ANGEL?! I'm going to hyperventilate.
May Be Bad: Angel is....ironic, I'm guessing? Or are we talking old school shock and awe kind of angel. Lucifer maybe.
Wake Myself: No? Izzy just calls me demon, so we call Luc angel cause he's sweeter than us?
May Be Bad: *slumps back in chair* that's....what the fuck are WE like that Lucius is the angel?
Wake Myself: Just a horny post-doc.
Mainverse: I mean same, but I didn't marry my childhood crush that's like thirty years older than me.
Wake Myself: Twenty.
Mainverse: *checks paper* Huh. okay. STILL
May Be Bad: Oh, if you don't like that you're gonna HATE me. *giggles*
The other three turn to him, observing this laugh and then give each other concerned looks.
Mainverse: oookay, who didn't make it into therapy?
May Be Bad: Why would we do therapy?
She Says Love: hoooo boy.
Mainverse: The sad empty void and the occasional bursts of rage? Those don't alarm you ever?
May Be Bad: That's just normal.
Wake Myself: Ooooh wow. Dude. Dude.
She Says Love: Doesn't it make it hard to function?
May Be Bad: Hell no. I'm motivated. Gotta make sure Jim and Luc have everything thing they need.
Mainverse: Jim?
May Be Bad: Uh huh. Sometimes Jim more than Luc honestly. Luc is technically harder to please, but Jim gives harder critique.
She Says Love: You are...not in a phd program, are you? Like Luc and Jim aren't some bizzaro world advisers?
May Be Bad: I'm in security consulting. *sharp grin*
Mainverse: Oh shit.
Wake Myself: Are we a criminal? Like a real one? I mean I break laws sometimes, but I'm not in the mob!
May Be Bad: It's not the mob. It's a business.
Mainverse: ....it's totally the mob.
She Says Love: So mobby. Does Dad know? He'd flip a shit.
May Be Bad: He's dead.
Wake Myself: Huh. I mean that's one way to resolve the Daddy issues. It's clean.
Mainverse: *visibly upset alon with She Says Love* what? What happened?
May Be Bad: *shifty* I don't know. He just disappeared or whatever when I was like nine.
Mainverse: Oh fuck, Eddy must be devastated.
May Be Bad:....never met them? Was that the person Dad was gonna hook up with before they bounced on him?
She Says Love: oooh I hate all of this. What the fuck?
Mainverse: Okay, okay, so obviously we can see where your shit jumped the tracks. And you, *gestures at Wake Myself* are just all wrong age wise. But uh... I guess I have one question.
Wake Myself: He's amazing in bed.
May Be Bad: Yeah, I get my spine melted on the reg. And don't get started on Luc.
Wake Myself: Two of them together?
*they make knowing eye contact*
Mainverse: ...I so badly want to be grossed out by this. But I kind of just want to know.
She Says Love: Same.
*so this all devolves into extremely pornographic descriptions, so they don't have to address the fact that May Be Bad is clearly completely morally comprimised. Charlies being excellent at repression manage this entirely. They all wake up horny, but also kind of sad.*
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Ummm IDK attachment stuff trauma stuff therapy stuff
I cried again in therapy yesterday, I wonder how much of my ability to cry again is just stress or whether any of it could be tied to me stopping HRT.
I talked about how I'm stuck in this fucked up cycle I don't ever see an escape from re:safety.
To feel safe means to let my guard down. To feel safe means feeling exactly the same way I felt when led into a false sense of security. Safety is what happens right before betrayal, loss, and trauma. Thus, feeling safe and noticing I feel safe immediately catapults me further back into defensiveness and fear. So how the fuck am I supposed to ever feel safe when the very feeling is a terrible trigger? Sometimes it feels like everything is just doomed to fail, like I'm running around a maze with no exit.
Similarly, connection is also scary. To be connected with someone is to put my safety, even a little bit, in their hands. And when I've been vulnerable with someone, often not even on purpose, they're holding that part of me forever. So it feels like I need to keep a close eye on what they do with it, or they'll use it to fuck me over. It feels like a leash. To feel connected is to feel tied down.
I wish I could live with no attachments, no values, no nothing. To have things, feelings, connections, etc is to have the possibility of them being taken away. No one could take anything away from me if I didn't have anything in the first place.
And one of the other things I mentioned in therapy was the fact that I've already been vulnerable around these people, my adoptive family. But it's never by choice. I've had flashbacks and panic attacks in their presence before, I've had small and/or scared parts cling to them in a way I don't feel I can. And my therapist said something along the lines of how it's good that these parts aren't scared of expressing a need for affection like I am. But like. The only reason they did, to be honest the only reason they came around, was because of fear. There was a bigger, scarier threat, even if the threat wasn't real. I can't be vulnerable or affectionate without fear. Fear seems to permeate every aspect of my life and relationships. Plus, when those parts went away and more adult parts came around, we feel...frankly terrible! About what those parts did. We feel guilty and scared and exposed and angry at ourselves for letting our guard down. We hate what we've done even though what we've done isn't bad.
TW for uh. IDK grooming and the like for this part but like.
I honestly feel like some part of it, and this is bleak and depressing as hell, is because I've only felt affection and expressed affection freely to people who wanted to fuck me. My oases of apparent safety from threats like my parents were in men who handled me gently and spoke to me softly and had bad intentions and kind hands. It was this illusion of them freeing me from control. I was controlled in so many other aspects of my life, and so having rampant sex with older men was me making my own decisions freely. But it kind of wasn't. Or maybe it was. Regardless the decisions were guided outside of my vision and bad decisions.
So when my past experiences with people are primarily sorted into the category of "overtly terrifying and will control me forever" or "safe on the surface, but with a knife behind their back" it's obviously hard to picture a third option. Especially if the third option feels an awful lot like the first stages of the second option.
IDK. I'm just always always always expecting and waiting for people to fuck me over. It feels a lot more safe when I know how they'd do it. It's hard to be two steps ahead when I can't see the track.
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Okay here goes. Rambles are going under the cut.
So. I tried to hint at it in the first two chapters, but Karut is very, very dangerous. It's similar to PNF-404 in the sense that both planets are very hard to successfully land on and it's downright impossible to get any messages in/out when you're on the planet's surface.
There's really only two differences: Karut is inhabited and is much, much colder. It's difficult to grow crops there, so Karutians primarily get their food by foraging and hunting. The planet has a few herbivorous species that are easier to hunt, but it also has a lot of predator species (I took a lot of inspiration from the on-land portions of Subnautica: Below Zero). So... Pom and pretty much every hunter on Karut are accustomed to fighting things much bigger than them.
And well. Pom got her Hunter-Forager license at fourteen. This is fairly normal for Karutians in this AU. Karut civilizations are split into two major groups: people who work in the city and people who leave the city to hunt/forage. Pom was part of the latter group, but that doesn't stop her from appreciating people who stay in the city to work. There's a saying on Karut: "There's not enough time in the day to live alone." Karutians heavily value community and teamwork because uh. If you don't work with other people on Karut, you usually die! So Karutians are raised with a very strong focus on working together and prioritize getting back to a group if, say, you're stranded somewhere.
So. Pom worked as a Hunter-Forager for... I'm thinking two or three years before she finally left. And there was definitely some major culture shock when she did. For one, Karutians are pretty codependent, but Pom left Karut without any of her family, so she got stuck in a school with a dorm to help her acclimate... for better or worse.
It also didn't help that Karutians are just kinda. Built different. Like... there's another saying that popped up after that group of Karutian refugees popped up: "Teach a Karutian how to fish, and he'll feed his family. Teach a Karutian how to swim, and no on will ever be safe again." Most Karutians don't know how to swim because the water on Karut was deathly cold. (That being said, Pom has taken beginner's swimming lessons. She's not going to win any swimming races soon, but she can fall into a normal river and keep herself afloat for a while.) Something about the way their bodies are just makes them unsuited for the water.
They have omnivorous diets, unlike Giyans and Hocotatians, and will eat pretty much anything without complaint. Karut doesn't have many options for spices, so most food there is... kinda bland (gotta get those Nutrients, no matter what your food tastes like). Karutians are also adapted to handle colder weather better than warm weather. It's also going to be mentioned in the next chapter that when Pom was younger, she had white hair. I'm not sure if it's going to be a form of seasonal camouflage or permanent (with Pom dying her hair as an adult), but it's a trait specific to Karutians.
So... there's kind of this stigma that Karutians are some kind of terminator species, but really? If you take a Karutian off of Karut, they'll probably get overwhelmed by all the extra sights/smells/tastes of whatever planet they end up on... it's difficult to adjust to the more private lifestyle that people on other planets have. Most people assume you're a goner if you get in a fight with a Karutian, but the truth is... it's not about being a good fighter. Karutians aren't super strong, and they don't any kind of super sense or super-lethal fighting style. They just do whatever it takes to get themselves and their team out alive.
Hm. I am going to have to put some trigger warnings on the next chapter of Four Riders. Hoo boy.
Anyway does anybody want to hear my ramblings about Karut in the Four Riders AU because y'all get to hear more about it in Chapter 3
#basically? Pom can handle facing dangerous creatures but if you asked her to eat one piece of spicy chicken she would Not Be Able to Do It.#She would NOT like the beach. Too hot. Too wet. This is not me projecting. (I say. definitely projecting)#idk if this makes any sense i'm very tired and a bit sick#four riders au
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Springtrap
Yandere
Male Reader
You can read part 1 here
Part 2
Quietly whistling, you enter the building, locking the door behind you and turning into the office, finding the familiar tall man leaning against the wall above the vent.
βWelcome back, Y/N. You ready?βΒ
You stretch, as per usual, humming. βAs Iβll ever be.β
He walks past you, patting your shoulder with a grin as he murmurs two words into your ear.
βGood luck.β
You deadpan as his teasing hits you, watching him wave as he passes the glass. Sighing, you plop down into the chair, cursing as your tailbone hits the metal again. You follow William with the cameras, him speedily making his way back to the last room, where he motions to the vent next to him, crossing his arms in an x.
You nod to yourself. He isnβt going to go in that vent, as it would give him the unfair advantage of being in a vent where you canβt block him off.
When he smirks at the camera and slinks into the shadows, you sigh, beginning your defense.
-
It was five when you really lost him. He was nowhere to be found.Β
You had exasperated a few more shades, excluding the one who seemed to really enjoy being about three inches from your face at all times. You didnβt really mind him, though; he was pretty hot.
Your brother wasnβt wrong when he called you βgayboy.β
Still, looking up, you see the man with a ripped up uniform staring down at you amusedly, his hand placed on the glass. Quickly, you play audio in the room to his left, making his grin lower as he gets led away by his body, you playing another sound in a further room before resetting audio.
You hear his rapid steps as audio reboots, watching him dart across the glass before finding him at the door frame. You lock eyes with him, a drop of sweat flowing down your cheek. Hearing the audio finish rebooting, you blindly grasp at the camera pad, violently and repeatedly pressing the sound button in a vain attempt to lure him away. Audio broke again because of how quickly you were spamming the button.
Right before he could take a step into your office, the bell chimes, and you shove the camera pad away from you, face hitting the desk with a thump as you let out a relieved sigh, feeling the stress leave your body.
βHmm. You did quite well, all things considered.β William praises, watching amusedly as you wearily raise your hand, curled in a thumbs up.Β
βI think I aged about a decade.β You groan, pushing yourself up to face your hunter for the night. You breathe heavier than usual, hair either sticking out or to your face from sweat, along with the light flush that comes with occasionally losing your oxygen supply.
Itβs a sight he plans to see again; granted, not in this context.
βIβll take that as a sign of quality pursuing.β He states, further entertained by your half-hearted glare. βWhat, do you have a problem with that?β
βYouβre too good.β You say.
His brow quirks at your words. βToo good?β
βYes, too good a pursuer. And you know what?β
βWhat?β
βFeeling like your prey for fifteen minutes was enough to completely wipe me. A whole six hours would genuinely kill me.β
He laughs, ignoring the feeling he gets from you calling yourself his prey.
βWell, Iβll just have to hunt to your limit. Now... isn't your shift over? Or do you just want to stay the day with me?β His grin makes his offer into what would easily be interpreted as a joke.
βSomething came up, unfortunately. I would stay and chat, but it seems I must be going.β
Of course, this is you weβre talking about.
William was somewhat taken aback. You said you would?!Β
You would stay back to talk with him?
He practically short-circuits, lips slightly open in shock. He only comes back to reality with the feeling of your hand running through his hair, ruffling it. Instinctually, he grabs it, looking at the hand in his grip and then at you, a small smile on your face.Β
βShould I not-β
βNo, you may. I justβ¦ wasnβt expecting it, is all.β He cuts you off, releasing your warm hand and watching with a pang of disappointment as your hand lowers, you stepping away. With a wave, you turn.Β
βSee you tomorrow, William.βΒ
He nods nearly breathlessly as you exit the building, lifting a hand and letting his fingers drift over his chest.Β
A pulse.
β¦Β
Then another.
β¦
And another.
His gaze lifts from his hand to the door you had exited through, expression shocked before his eyelids droop once more, lips forming a drunken grin.Β
You are his, the one he needs most, his perfect prize and his perfect prey.
You, who gave a corpse his heartbeat.
Itβs about 17 hours later that you stumble in, Your frazzled state catching William off guard. You slouch over as you walk, the dark color under your eyes speaking to how many hours of sleep you got.Β
Entering the office, you, for once, sit down calmly in your chair, your head hitting the table in front of you. You turn to face the rabbit-eared man, eyes half-lidded and dull.
βI came in an hour early to sleep, if you donβt mindβ¦β You drawl, him grimacing at your state.
βFeel free to.βΒ
He hums as your eyes shut, and he watches your body fully untense, noting the chair slowly rolling out from beneath you. Your face is peaceful, nearly the same expression you gave him on the first night after first meeting him face-to-face.
He sighs, stepping closer and grabbing your midsection right before you would've fallen. Your eyes don't even open, but you quietly groan, continuing to sleep as the man considers his options.Β
He can rest you on the floor?Β
No, when you wake up you'll need to peel yourself off of it.
He can put you back in the chair?
You'll probably fall out of it.
There is that staff room he foundβ¦Β
Eh, it's his best option.
There's a couch in there, too.
He lifts you onto his back in order to not continue holding you like a wet towel, walking out of the office and into the area where cam three was active, finding the door in between a few props. Opening it, he feels the floor beneath his bare feet shift from grimy tile to thin carpet, colored black, along with a dark, ugly green couch. Thereβs a vent on the wall, a secret entrance to your officeβs vent.
As he goes to place you down on the couch, he realizes that your arms are wrapped around his collar, head leaning into his.Β
He regrets not paying attention earlier, as you were practically a heating pad. His arms, very loosely circling your legs, release as he leans closer to the couch, hovering with his back over it before realizing that, hey, you were asleep!
So, he lets himself turn, your arms still wrapped around the back of his neck, instead holding you up on his front.
Now, he decides to lay down on the couch, his tall physique making his legs have to be propped up on one arm of the couch. You lay on top of him, head nestled in the crook of his neck, allowing him to feel your soft breaths across his skin.
His arms wrap around you, feeling your warmth. With a small, satisfied grin, he feels the slightest flush cross his cheeks as you nuzzle closer. You were made for him; made to fit perfectly against him, made to be his, forever.
He doesnβt even notice as his eyelids drift down, consciousness fading.Β
Goodnight, Y/N.
-
It was to the chime of the bell that you woke up, letting out a small sigh before you begin to take in your circumstances, eyes still not open.Β
You fell asleep at work, but it certainly isn't midnight, as the bell had just chimed. It also isn't the chair you fell asleep in.
As they shift around you, holding you tighter to him, you realize that arms surround you, and that it seems likely you're sleeping on the rabbit man.Β
Before you try to roll over and off of him (which was a dumb idea; William would've fallen with you), you feel him wake up based on the rumbles in his chest as he lowly groans.
You sigh, half-heartedly pushing yourself up. "Good morning, William."
His eyes shoot open, and he looks down, noting you and the position you were both in. "Mind letting me go?"Β
"Uh- yes, sure." He releases you, allowing you to get off of him, stretching with a yawn. Meanwhile, William was reeling.Β
You, saying good morning?
Your rusty morning voice?
You, apparently not caring about how you were just asleep on top of him?
Actually, he almost wishes you did care about it; you being embarrassed would be adorable.
"So⦠where is this?" You ask, looking over your shoulder at the man as he sits up, already feeling the void of your warmth.
"We're in the staff room. The door leads right into the attraction."Β
You hum, nodding, him standing with a small sigh before standing at your side, his hand placing itself on your shoulder.Β
"Nevermind that - what exactly made you into a walking corpse? Don't you know I already have that role covered?" He asks, a joking tone in his voice. You smile.
"Well, remember the funerals I got off my main job for? I had to go to one." You sigh, feeling his understanding shoulder pat.Β
"How unfortunate that you had to do the thing you were getting off of work to do."Β
That understanding shoulder pat turns sour!
"Listen. I, uh, can't really argue with thatβ¦"
William smirks. "No, you can't."
You sigh again, defeated. "Well, I need to head home. Thank you for letting me sleep through my shift, by the way. You make for a spectacular bed." It is with those parting words that you exit the room, not even allotting him the time to process your words.
Stiffly, he stands, following you out the door and back into the main area of the building, where the last he sees of you for some hours is the door closing behind you.Β
He finds that watching you leave each night makes the cold emptiness hit him once more, returning him to a state similar to how he was when trapped. His lips, previously in a stricken pout, now fall into a scowl.Β
You, you, youβ¦
He fell asleep easily and dreamt of a peaceful void when you were there. But now that you aren'tβ¦
His dreams will never be calm. That brief instance of tranquility was like a drug to him; he wants more, the quiet, warm existence in a space consisting of nothing. Nothing to bring him pain. Nothing to bring him fear.Β
But, nothing to bring him joy.
If he stays with you, will his dreams return to light? Will he feel your arms wrapped around him, holding him close as he buries his face into the crook of your neck?
Letting out a shuddering breath, he forcefully breaks himself out of his thoughts, looking down at his hands as they shake. Lifting one to his face, he feels his mouth in a wide grin.Β
He already knows what he wants.Β
He already knows what he needs to do.
But he needs to be patient.
-
As you reenter the building, William perks up to the sound of the door closing behind you. He purposefully replaces his wide, unsettling grin with a casual smirk, entering the hallway and seeing you.Β
He will never get tired of you in your uniform.
You lift your head to meet his gaze, hearing him approach. He waves through the glass, you doing the same thing in return. You, per usual, stretch your arms above your head, feeling them get grabbed by William. Looking up at him, you raise an eyebrow, not noticing his grin.Β
βSay, could you get out of that seat real quick?β
You hum in confirmation, him releasing your wrists as you stand.
You deadpan as he takes the seat, sitting down in it. "Wow. Asshole."
He laughs. "Think of this as charity."
"I'll think of it as what it is, thievery." You huff, sitting on the desk as a replacement for your stolen chair.
He laughs again.Β
You roll your eyes, leaning your head on your arm, which is propped up on your leg. "I think the dude who got you made a really good choice."
William pauses. "Okay, now I think you're actually flirting with me."
"Take it as you will. But what I mean is he made a great choice for a horror attraction in finding you. Your big form is scary as hell, what with the actual organs about to spill out and stuff. Your human form⦠I wouldn't describe you as scary. Intimidating to someone who doesn't know you, maybe, but not scary."
"And what makes me... intimidating?" He asks, face forming into an amused expression as he watches you deadpan for a moment at his tone.
"Your scars, sure, but the main thing is your height. You're like, what, 6'7?"
"I was still quite tall when I was fully human, too."
"Really? How tall?"
"Around 6'4 or 6'5."
You whistle. "Damn, you didn't even grow that much, even when you got a boost from the suit. Actually, how does that even work?"Β
"The suits? Well, when bodies are shoved into the suits and become trapped, their souls begin to merge with the vessel. For me, it took a long time, because I was around your age, but for the other suitsβ¦" He pauses, flicking one of the bobbleheads. "It didn't take them very long at all."
You nod. "Because they were kids⦠I never understood it."
His brow lifts. "Never understood what?"
"Why someone would kill them, and 11 of them at that. Kids can be annoying, sure, but⦠they still deserve a chance to grow." Your eyes focus on the ground, brows drawn together.
"I see." He responds, silent other than those words. You don't notice how his expression turns cold, lips in a downward curve. His reason for slaughtering the kids is simple.Β
He wanted to.Β
You look up, his face shifting to solemnity.Β
You offer him a weak grin. "Sorry 'bout bringing that up, it's a bit heavy."
"No, it's fine."
You hum, leaning back while your hands grip the edge of the table. "I think I'm gonna miss this. The fifteen-something minutes we got here."
He tilts his head, so you take that as a sign to elaborate. "Tomorrow's my last day. I can still visit, of course, but I'll be heading back to my job on Tuesday."
His eyes widen as he processes it. Of course, it was never going to be permanent. The pay was shit, and you even told him that you had a month off, nothing more.Β
He doesn't want to let you go, not when you're right there, not when you won't be showing yourself as often.Β
"You good?" You ask, him nodding as his gaze shifts quickly to the door you leave through. All he needs to do is block it, then you'll be forced to go through the whole attraction if you want an immediate exit.
"Yes, just wondering how often you'll stop by." His eyes shift back to yours. Of course, he hadn't even considered the question. He knows there isn't any need to worry, not when you'll be at his side the whole time. He'll bind you to him, make it impossible for you to escape.
"I should be able to on weekends, and maybe Wednesdays? It depends on my schedule. So at least twice a week." You smile, the slight head tilt adding to the charm. "It's good to know I've made an impact on someone here, though. William, I really do enjoy your company."
His soft smile holds a hint of euphoria.Β
You enjoy his company?Β
He hopes you will feel the same over the years. His ideaβ¦Β
He knows exactly how to do it.
"I enjoy yours as well."
"Well, I'd hope. Me waking up on top of you would've been a bit more awkward if you didn't." You chuckle, his smile slightly widening.
Of course, it couldn't happen tonight.
"I suppose so."
Your brow raises, arms crossing. "You sure you're good? You seem rather⦠subdued." You question.
He shrugs, feeling the strange warmth form in the pit of his stomach as he hears you worry for him. "I'm just a bit tired, I suppose. Sleeping last night threw me off." Well, he is actuallyΒ a bit tired.
You nod, still feeling as if something is off. "I can get that. When I got home last night, I immediately crawled into bed and passed out again."
"You were still tired?"
"Well, seven hours isn't much when I had stayed up for over 40. Wait, you were tired? Animatronic-corpse-hybrid-whatevers can get tired?"
His casual grin returns. "Especially in this form, yes. I'm still a close-enough-to-living-thing to get tired normally."Β
"Huh. How strange." You simply respond, eyes slipping upwards and not noticing as he rolls forward.Β
"Hey, could you hold out your hand real quick? Like this." He holds out his hand in a way similar to how you grab a drink, you copying him with a slightly confused expression. With that, he rolls slightly closer, and after closing his eyes, rests his head on your hand, your fingers cupped over his cheek.
You feel your brain lag.
Your mouth opens once, you soon figuring out that whatever you would say would be incomprehensible, so it's best to not even try.
William lets out a breath, seeming to deflate into your touch. A few moments later, his eyes open to the sound of the 6 am bell and the sight of your somewhat flushed face. He leans away, leaving you still very confused. "Thanks for that."Β
"You'reβ¦ welcome?"Β
He's already missing your touch. "Well, we should both get some rest, tomorrow's your final night." But certainly not your last with him. William rolls back, giving you the space to get off of your desk.
You nod slowly. "Uh-yeah. That's true." Sliding off of the desk, you let out a small groan while you stretch, a lot of air hissing into the noise. After you shake your head to clear it, you send a smile towards William before beginning to leave. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow."Β
"Of course." He responds. When he hears the click of the door, he stands up. He needs to get some rest if he wants to be in top shape.Β
His lips curl into a sneer, already knowing his plan would be successful.Β
Exiting the room, he heads to the back of the attraction, returning to his animatronic form and standing in the spot he started all of this in.Β
Tomorrow.Β
Tomorrow.
Part 3
#springtrap#springtrap x reader#william afton#william afton x reader#afton#fnaf#fnaf x reader#fnaf 3#yandere#yandere fnaf#yandere springtrap#yandere x reader#five nights at freddy's#x reader#male reader#male insert#reader insert#fnaf springtrap#gay
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THAT'S NOT FAIR!
I wrote something self-indulgent for myself ~
Note: "(Y/n)" has her/she pronouns. And sorry if the translator changed any pronoun, I re-read it already but if something's left I'll correct it later!
At NRC, there weren't many opportunities for an entire course to come together in one class, but this was one of those days when it did. Professor Vargas had told all his students something about how observing other people, apart from classmates, could awaken in each one a feeling of improvement and rivalry that would make them try harder everyday. And having said that, he gathered all the first-year classes in the schoolyard, so that each of the students could do the sport that they most wanted.
Ace, Deuce and (Y/n) βwho was carring Grimβ walked around looking sideways in search of their friends, and after a few seconds they saw Jack's hand, calling for them above all the student heads around. The four of them made room to pass netween their classmates, and found Jack and Epel there.
"Hey ~" Ace greeted, raising his hand. Deuce and Epel bumpled their fists, and Jack smiled. "Well, I'll be brief: Basketball"
"You're making up your own mind, Ace" Grim said reluctantly.
"You know, there are two people here from the athletic club, if we were to pick something by majority we would win" Deuce commented casually, glancing at Jack.
Ace mockingly mimicked him, then put his arms behind his head.
"What do you want to play then?"
"Anything, I only want to start moving NOW" said Epel, who had already begun to stretch.
"Same here" Jack said, folding his arms. "I just want something to keep me going."
"Well, then it's decided!" Ace turned away, before Deuce could say anything to him. "I'm going for a baβ!"
"I THINK that what Professor Vargas wants is for us to try new experiences."
"UWAH!" Ace was startled to see someone cutting him off, which he almost bumped in. "SEBEK!? Since WHEN were you there!?"
Sebek arched an eyebrow, not changing his expression too much.
"I have listened to your conversation from the very beginning, human. If that's what you mean."
"... Well, now that we are 7 at least we can play 3 VS 3."
"... Huh? But if we were 6 before, right?";(Y/n) said, counting.
"Ahβ did you count Grim? 'Cause I didn't"
"HEY, ACE! I'M GONNA TO HIT YOU, YOU SEE!" Grim yelled at him angrily as Ace held up his tongue.
"AS I WAS SAYING," Sebek began, walking a few more steps to the other boys, "I think trying something that no one practices on a regular basis would be a much more enriching experience for everyone."
Ace narrowed his eyes at him, though Sebek didn't seem to have noticed him. Deuce put a hand to his chin thoughtfully.
"Sounds like a good option to me, actually" he said, glancing at (Y/n) and Grim, who nodded. Jack seemed to be listening intently, and Epel's eyes were fixed on Sebek, since he wanted to get started as soon as possible. "Do you have any suggestions, Sebek?"
"Hmpf. Of course I do" he said, smiling, and then headed straight for a bench.
They all looked at each other without understanding anything, and followed him. Sebek ended up sitting up and putting his elbow on the table, and when everyone saw him smile proudly they knew what it was about.
"Arm wrestling? Like, seriously?" Ace asked, looking bored. He sought support from the others, looking at them, but he was surprised to see everyone really wanting to get started.
"Do you think you can beat me?" Jack asked confidently. "I was competing against Leona-senpai some days ago."
"Impressive, but yes: I think I can win. Do not underestimate the bodyguard of the great Malleus Draconia."
Jack smiled and sat down at the table, and they both put their hands together for a second after they started. They were both too strong, so they just smiled while straining.
Epel was looking at them with super bright eyes, and then he turned to Deuce, clenching his fists tightly.
"DEUCE! We are next! I'm not losing to you!"
Deuce looked at him in surprise, but then his grimace changed to a crooked smile as he collided with one of his fists against his other hand.
"I'm going to do everything I can to win you over, huh?" He said, and Epel was quick to nod and sit up to go against him.
They both put their elbows on the table and clasped their hands, and on the count of three they started. From the start Deuce seemed to have the upper hand, but Epel didn't give up on the first try, keeping his arm up for a long time. Deuce knew that if he used as much force as in his past days, he could win, but he was no longer like that, so he gave his all without going to extremes that were not going to be good for him or for his opponent. But still, he was struggling. And that made him feel proud of his friend, who seemed to be getting stronger every day through training and perseverance.
"Epel, your training seems to be paying off" Deuce said, smiling, though his tone darkened a bit afterward. "But I'm not going to let you beat me."
"HA!" said Epel, cocky. "We both train very hard, but there is something that I have and you don't ~"
Deuce arched an eyebrow not knowing what his opponent was planning on him... until he fixed his eyes on him: Epel was looking at him with the brightest and most adorable eyes he'd ever seen.
"Huuum, Deuce-kun, you're too strong ... I'm not going to be able to beat you ... ~"
Deuce shuddered when he heard that high-pitched tone of voice suddenly, which made Epel suddenly use more force and knock down Deuce's arm, thus winning the game. Epel stood up with a jump, returning to his normal voice again.
"TAKE THAT, YOU LOSER! WOOOOOOO!"
Deuce blinked a few times, unaware of what had just happened. But as he recovered, he snapped his eyes open and pointed at Epel, embarrassed.
"EPEL! THAT'S NOT FAIR!
"What's not fair?" Epel asked, pretending to be oblivious, but without losing his smile.
"Deuce... You have to lose that irrational fear you have of women... Or well, of everything just a little femenine, ya know" Ace said, sighing.
"It's not irrational! EPEL! I DEMAND ANOTHER MATCH!"
"Eeeeeh...?"
Ace, Grim and (Y/n) stood watching them argue a bit, not saying anything ... until Ace and (Y/n) ended up looking sideways. And Ace then showed a mocking smile.
"... Weeeell, (Y/n)... Do you want me to crush you?~"
"You speak very confidently for being the weaklest guy in the basketball club, Ace" Grim said quickly, to which (Y/n) gave a small laugh.
"WEAKL...! All right, Grim, you against me! But if you end up crying don't blame me, huh"
"Whatever, I'm gonna win you over."
Ace sat down at the table and Grim jumped on top of it. They both put their arms in position and on the count of three, they started the match... which ended just as quickly.
"... Wait, WHAT!?" That scream sounded so loud that other students turned to look his way. "THAT'S NOT FAIR! (Y/N)! WHY HAVE YOU HELPED HIM!?"
"Hum? What are you talking about?" (Y/n) asked innocently, whose hand was on Grim's paw, and both of them had managed to knock Ace down in no time.
"HEY, DON'T PLAY FOOL!"
"Tch, tch, tch ... Ace, my minion and I are one student. If you are looking for a fight with me, you are looking for it with her. This is how things are ~"
Meanwhile, Sebek and Jack continued to compete. Neither of them seemed to want to give in and be the last loser of the day.
"Aren't you tired yet, Sebek?"
"Not at all. I am totally focused on our match."
"Heh. I supposed it. Although it seems that the others have already finished. We should finish soon.β
"HA! That those humans and that magic monster are not as good as us is none of our business."
"... You're right, I just have to beat you."
That made everyone turn their heads towards the two of them, especially Ace and Deuce, the losers from the previous rounds. The two of them frowned at being treated like that, looked at each other, and ended up reading each other's minds. Epel, Grim and (Y/n) could feel how they weren't planning anything good... even though they couldn't say anything about it. Ace and Deuce took a breath then, and...
"M-M-MALLEUS-SENPAI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?"
"KINGSCHOLAR-SENPAI! HAVE YOU COME TO WATCH JACK'S MATCH?"
And then, Sebek and Jack reacted at the same time, getting up from the place very upright, turning to see their superiors ...
"WAKA-SAMA, IT'S AN HONORβ!"
"LEONA-SENPAI, I WASβ"
... Only to realize that they were nowhere to be found.
"WOW, Sebek, looks like you've lost, huh? ~"
"Now we're in the same boat, Jack ~"
The two of them were stunned to realize that they had given up at the same time, and thus, they had both lost.
"Good work, Deuce-kun ~
"Same there, Ace-kun ~
Ace and Deuce bumpled fists, grinning. When they weren't arguing, the truth was that they made a great team. Although...
"... Uh... You two... I don't think it's time to celebrate."
They both turned to Grim and could see Sebek and Jack getting dangerously close to them, stretching their arms and clenching their fists.
"Time to show them who the losers are"
"I was going to say the exact same thing"
Epel, Grim, and (Y/n) stood, watching the chase live... until Epel finally said something.
"Well... do you want to take one more?"
"Of course! This is the one to see who wins!" Grim said, jumping back onto the table.
"No cheating this time, okay? We will play as it should from the beginning" (Y/n) said him, laughing, and placing her hand on Grim's paw.
Epel smiled and joined them, getting ready.
"OK! So... AT THE COUNT OF THREE...!"
#twst#twisted wonderland#epel felmier#deuce spade#ace trappola#jack howl#sebek zigvolt#grim#twst imagines#twst writing#self indulgent
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Scene 1
(At school, a female student is running from something in the darkened halls. Her glasses get broken, blurring her vision. Without her glasses, she can barely see someone in the distance. She puts her broken glasses back on and notices a nearby surveillance camera turning by itself. The girl looks forward. Someone is in front of her. It's Doll. She uses her AbsoluteSolver to tear the girl's right arm off. She then summons a cleaver, multiplies it times three, and kills the girl.)
(Later, she returns to her home, stepping on a bug in the process, uses her telekinesis powers to put her books onto a shelf, then crosses the girl's name, Kelsey, off a list.)
Doll: ΠΠ°ΠΌ, ΠΠ°ΠΏ, Ρ Π²Π΅ΡΠ½ΡΠ»Π°ΡΡ. (I'm back, Mom, Dad.)
(We see a hoard of cockroaches on the walls.)
Scene 2
Uzi: (To N) What... are you things...?
(Uzi is in sleep mode.)
GUILT: ACTIVE
(She wakes up, still guilty over denying N's help after battling Eldritch J. She looks up at a drawing of herself and N, who she probably received the drawing from as thanks for being his friend. she begins groaning. She does this throughout the school day. In class, in the gym (As she gets hit by a dodgeball, though this barely snaps her out of it), and finally, at her locker. Rebecca walks by and knocks Uzi off the small stack of books she was standing on to reach her locker door.)
Rebecca: Yeah, meeting Brad in an hour.
(Uzi takes one of her books and hurls it at Rebecca.)
Rebecca: Can you imagine going to prom alone?
(Uzi's book hits Braiden instead.)
Trevor: Ha, I'd be all like, "I don't deserve happiness."
(Uzi sighs, picks up her book, and turns to leave. She stops when some missing persons posters get her attention. She looks over to see a janitor cleaning up an oil spill, then upwards to see a security camera glitching. Cackling, she snags the posters and rushes back home to put them on the ceiling. But to her shock, the papers that were on the ceiling before are now gone.)
(It turns out Khan had taken them and placed them in a closet labeled "NORI'S KOOKY INSANE STUFF". As he leaves, he spots Uzi sulking in a corner.)
Uzi: (Turns and runs to Khan angrily) My crazed ramblings! Stay outta my freaking room!
Khan: Personal space for a very alarming coping mechanisms isn't covered under a (Consults his manual) "non-optional family support structure".
Uzi: (Smacks the manual out of his hands) I'm sorry for being vulnerable for five seconds, okay!? You were never there for me. If you wanna help now, stay distant.
(Khan doesn't respond.)
Uzi: (Sighs) I'm going to talk to N. (She comes across a child's skeleton wearing a dress.) What is this?!
Khan: Prom dress. Child's small. You're grounded from seeing those bad influencing murder drones.
Uzi: Huh?
Khan: But, I talked to your teacher to find you classmates to go with tonight!
Uzi: HUH?!
(Khan opens a door, revealing Lizzy and Doll.)
Lizzy: 'Sup, freak. Prepare to be popular.
Khan: I'm chaperoning! (Uzi screams at all of this.)
Scene 3
(Two frozen skeletons are shown. One wears a red, sparkling dress, while the other wears a tuxedo.)
N: I do want to be dapper... But no! That's why you had me find these? We can't interact with the workers anymore, V. (He flashes back to when Uzi denied his help.) We're too dangerous...
V: Uh, exactly. We show up fabulous, the sad purple one lets us in, cause she has no friends, we kill everyone, and pop her little head off.
N: I'm not bringing you for prom murder, V. J went holo-spooky-snake-crab and we maybe grew up in a haunted mansion! Aren't you worried we have no idea what we even are?!
(No response.)
V: ...Promise me you and that purple thing will stop prying into that stuff. If you free me now, I promise we'll only kill what we need to survive. Just you and me, N...
(She and N stare at a nearby key.)
(Back with Uzi. She, Lizzy, and Doll are at Doll's house.)
Lizzy: (Grossed out by her surroundings) Ugh. Doll, do you ever clean?
Doll: Π― ΠΏΠΎΠ²Π΅ΡΠΈΠ»Π° ΠΏΡΠΎΡΡΡΠ½Ρ. ΠΠ½ΠΈ ΡΠΏΡΡ. (I put a sheet up. They're sleeping.)
(Uzi avoids stepping on a bug. She starts to get freaked out by the place.)
Uzi: Hey, so, thanks for having me, but now that my dad thinks I'm here, I'm actually gonna- (The door closes before she could bail out.)
Lizzy: You're hilarious. (To Doll) She's hilarious. (Back to Uzi) You should get ready. You're gonna look so cute, in a brave way.
(Uzi turns, and Doll magically appears in front of her. Creeped out, Uzi looks down at a trash can next to Doll, which contains more missing persons posters.)
Doll: ΠΠ°Π½Π½Π°Ρ ΠΏΠΎ ΠΊΠΎΡΠΈΠ΄ΠΎΡΡ Π½Π°Π»Π΅Π²ΠΎ. (Bathroom is down the hall to the left.)
(Uzi backs away slowly, groaning.)
(Meanwhile...)
N: Uh... V, if you're hiding something, we can figure it out together. Even if we each only have pieces. Please, what do you know- (V slices his head off.)
V: What's best for you. Even if you hate me for it.
(As this goes on, Uzi is in the restroom, cleaning herself in front of a mirror. Her left eye suddenly acts crazy.)
Uzi: Easy, Robo-Satan. Not this mirror.
(The mirror suddenly breaks. She climbs up and hears talking on the other side.)
Lizzy: (Muffled) Dude, no one will notice she's missing. Just do your thing, and I'll let in V. We'll see you there.
Uzi: What the f-
(She hears something else. A dripping noise. She looks over and sees blood dripping from the tub. She goes to investigate. She pulls back the curtain to find...)
(Back at the Corpse House, N wakes up screaming.)
N: (Gets up) Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no...! (As he leaves, he looks back at the skeletons. Then tries to leave again. Then looks back.) No, no time! (He leaves... Then peeks his head back down.) Dapper N...
(Meanwhile, Uzi is disgusted to find Doll's tub is filled with corpses and photos covered in blood. She suddenly hears footsteps. She looks up at a ventilation shaft.)
(Doll enters the bathroom only to find that Uzi has escaped by building a ladder out of some of the materials in the tub.)
Doll: ΠΠ°ΠΊ ΠΎΠ½ΠΈ ΠΏΠΎ-ΡΡΡΡΠΊΠΈ Π»ΡΠ±ΡΡ Π³ΠΎΠ²ΠΎΡΠΈΡΡ... "ΠΠΉ, Ρ Π΄ΠΎΠ»ΠΆΠ½Π° Π±ΡΠ»Π° ΠΏΡΠ΅Π΄ΠΏΠΎΠ»ΠΎΠΆΠΈΡΡ, ΡΡΠΎ ΠΊΡΠΎ-ΡΠΎ ΡΠΌΠΎΠΆΠ΅Ρ ΡΠ±Π΅ΠΆΠ°ΡΡ ΡΠ΅ΡΠ΅Π· Π²Π΅Π½ΡΠΈΠ»ΡΡΠΈΡ, ΠΈΡΠΏΠΎΠ»ΡΠ·ΡΡ Π²ΡΠ±ΡΠΎΡΠ΅Π½Π½ΡΠ΅ Π·Π΅ΡΠΊΠ°Π»Π° ΠΊΠ°ΠΊ ΡΡΡΠΏΠ΅Π½ΡΠΊΠΈ." (As they say in Russian... "Whoops, I should've predicted that someone could escape out of a ventilation shaft using discarded mirrors as stairs.")
(Outside, Uzi is running when she collides with N.)
Uzi: N?!
N: Uzi?
(Speaking at the same time...)
Uzi: Why are- N: You look-
Uzi: How did- N: I, uh-
Uzi: I think something bad-
N: I could help. (Walks off muttering under his breath) But you probably don't want me...
Uzi: No, I could use the help... of you... being there... with me...
N: (Rushes behind her and puts his hands on her shoulders) Dapper buddies! (She nudges him away, but is still happy to be friends with him again.)
Scene 4
(At the prom, everyone is either having the time of their lives or are bored out of their metaphoric skulls. Eventually, Lizzy walks on stage.)
Lizzy: Okay, listen up, nerds. We're doing this a little early, but since the entire prom court "mysteriously" disappeared, your queen by forfeit is uh, this.
(V drops in, terrifying everyone.)
Guy: Oh, we're gonna die!
Lizzy: Easy, judgey bots, V is my friend. She's done with the murder or whatever. We've been hanging.
V: Yes, best friends. So easily manipulated... (She begins cackling, then stops.) Prom queen? (She looks at a nervous Lizzy, then over to the crown that's supposed to be given to her.) Ugh...
(Holding a list, Doll chuckles evilly.)
Lizzy: So, forgive and forget, or I'll get my dad to dock your freakin' grades! (Points) And you can't sit with us, Rebecca.
Rebecca: ...Fine, I forgive her, settle...!
(Everyone applauds.)
Guy: She's quite cute, though.
Lizzy: Clap harder, losers!
Penny: (To V) Your dress is really cute! (She crowns V.)
V: I... Uh...
Crowd: Speech, speech!
(Khan tries to leave, but the doors are sealed shut by Doll's AbsoluteSolver.)
Khan: Not... the doors...!
V: I'll kill everyone after? It's not vain, it's extra sinister...
(V goes up to the mic to make her speech as Doll begins to unleahs her AbsoluteSolver and kill her. Before she could, Uzi and J crash down behind her.)
Uzi: Ah ha! Unhand them, you fiend- (Everyone is staring at them awkwardly.) I'm confused.
Lizzy: On second thought, you're way hotter than Doll! Run, idiot!
(Before V could move, Doll unleashes her AbsoluteSolver and makes her arms get stuck. As everyone flees for their lives, Penny is crushed by the AbsoluteSolver.)
Doll: (Slowly advancing towards her) ΠΡΠΈΠ²Π΅Ρ, ΠΠΈ. (Hello, V.)
(She makes V flashback to when V killed her mother.)
Doll: ΠΠ°Π΄Π½ΠΎ, ΡΠ΅Π±Π΅ Π²ΡΡ ΠΏΠΎΠ½ΡΡΠ½ΠΎ. (Anyway, you get it.)
(V frees her right arm and fires at Doll, but the shots deal no damage. Doll summons her cleaver and flings it at V, severing her arm. Doll then summons a fan blade down.)
Uzi: Holy crap, what is she doing?!
N: This isn't what I expected at all! I guess we should... Uh... (Uzi groans.)
(Doll flings the blade at V. Just as she braces for the worst, N swoops in and kicks the blade to the side. Uzi flings her knife, which damages her AbsoluteSolver. This removes the AS on the door as well, letting everyone escape.)
Doll: Π£Π·ΠΈ, ΡΡ ΠΏΡΠ°Π²Π΄Π° Π½Π° ΡΡΠΎΡΠΎΠ½Π΅ ΠΡΠΎΠ½ΠΎΠ²-Π£Π±ΠΈΠΉΡ? Π― Π½Π΅ Π΅Π΄ΠΈΠ½ΡΡΠ²Π΅Π½Π½Π°Ρ, ΠΊΡΠΎ ΠΏΠΎΡΠ΅ΡΡΠ»Π° ΠΈΠ·-Π·Π° Π½ΠΈΡ
ΡΠ΅ΠΌΡΡ. (Uzi, you would really side with the Murder Drones? I'm not the only one who's lost family to them.)
Uzi: Bite me! Whoever started this wants us to fight. I'm not dealing with anything well, but I'm done dealing with everything alone. (She looks at N, and they smile softly at each other.) We move forward together, or not at all.
Doll: ΠΠ°ΠΊ ΠΌΠΈΠ»ΠΎ, Π½ΠΎ ΠΌΠ½Π΅ ΡΠ²ΠΎΡ ΠΏΠΎΠΌΠΎΡΡ Π½Π΅ Π½ΡΠΆΠ½Π°. (Cute, but I don't need help.)
(Her AS pierces through N and she launches the blades his way. N shoves Uzi to the side and gives one final thumbs up before the blades strike him. Khan tries to rush in and help his daughter, only for Doll to re-seal the door shut using the AbsoluteSolver.)
(Doll summons her knife and hurls it towards Uzi, who catches it through her left hand. The two begin to engage in a battle.)
(Meanwhile, with N, he reaches over for a crawling arm.)
N: Is this-
V: Mine! (She snatches the arm away from him.)
Lizzy: Ew. You look like garbage.
V: (With the arm in her mouth) You frickin' traitor!
Lizzy: As if you weren't using me to try and kill everyone, Ms. Petty. (Looks at the arm) Where does this freaking go?
N: Thank you, Lizzy!
Lizzy and V: Shut up, loser.
(Meanwhile, Doll and Uzi are still battling until Uzi gets downed. Doll picks up her knife, multiplies it, and hurls them towards Uzi. But N blocks them all with his wings. He then helps Uzi up after Uzi pulls the mic stands off her.
Uzi: Quit saving me!
(N and Uzi continue dodging while doing dancing poses.)
Uzi: Seriously. Don't do that again.
N: Uzi... Ah, okay, your turn! (He tosses Uzi out of the way and gets hit by an oncoming table.)
(Doll levitates some tables and Uzi makes her way across them. Uzi grabs knives and hurls them at Doll and they knock Doll's bracelet off as she turns around to stare at it. Uzi kicks Doll while she is turned away and Doll begins to unleash her Absolu-)
(SPLAT!)
(V struck Doll from behind with her hand as a gun. Doll falls to the floor lifeless.)
Uzi: V, we needed her for answers!
V: What? She's fine. Uhh... A little tuckered out...
N: V did that on purpose! She's hiding mystery stuff and being over dramatic about it!
V: Hey! (Punches N) You suck!
Uzi: You! (V and N point at each other accusingly.) Lucky for you, we're not done yet. (Uzi picks up and holds the key to Doll's house.)
Scene 5
(Uzi, N, and V arrive at Doll's house. N turns on the lights.)
Uzi: Uh-oh...
V: Hehe. Nice.
(Corpses, garbage, and insects are scattered all over the place. V has an arm in her mouth.)
Uzi: (Taking the arm out) Ugh, self respect! (The trio spread out to snoop around.) Why would a worker drone... (She gets oil on her fingers.) Was she eating them? (She places the arm into a container holding two more.)
(Meanwhile, N uncovers two corpses.)
N: (Disturbed) I think we found her folks...
V: They don't really, didn't even taste that good.
N: V, you kind of suck.
V: Yeah. I'm not doing okay. (She eats a bug.)
(Uzi makes her way over to investigate. Uzi checks out a name tag. Yeva. Doll's mother.)
(Suddenly, Doll teleports in behind them and begins to repair herself.)
Doll: ΠΠ°ΠΊ ΡΠ°Π· ΠΊ ΡΠΆΠΈΠ½Ρ. (Just in time for dinner.)
(Everyone turns around as a shot is fired...)
(...Uzi stops the bullet with her AbsoluteSolver.)
Doll: ΠΠ½Π΅... ΠΠ½Π΅ ΡΠ΅Π±Ρ... (I... I'm sorry...)
(The bullet ricochets.)
Doll: ...ΠΠ°Π»Ρ. ΠΡΠ»ΠΈ Ρ Π½Π°ΠΉΠ΄Ρ ΡΠΎ, ΡΡΠΎ ΠΈΡΡ, ΡΠΎ ΠΈ ΡΠ΅Π±Π΅ ΠΏΠΎΠΌΠΎΠ³Ρ. (...For you. If I find what I'm looking for, I'll help you too.)
Uzi: What?!
Doll: ΠΠ·Π²ΠΈΠ½ΠΈ. (I am sorry.)
(V flies up to attack.)
Uzi: (Rushes towards Doll) What? Oh, don't you dare!
(Too late. V has already blown Doll to bits.)
Uzi: (Shouting towards the heavens) Ugh, I hate it HEEERE!!!
Scene 6
(Meanwhile, a Worker Drone, Reid, is digging through the snow, where he finds his missing glasses.)
Reid: Ah, that's where I left my excuse to be outside right now.
(He puts his glasses on, and looks up as a Murder Drone pod comes hurling towards him. He gets out of the way, only to get thrown back by an explosion. He survives, only for another pod to come arrive. The pod's passenger comes out and slices Reid's head off. It's Tessa, certified technician for JCJenson.)
Tessa: Righty-o. Work to do. Eh, J? (J flies in next to her, newly rebuilt and reprogrammed. She hands her a keychain.) Maintenance work... (She presses a car alarm button and a car beeps.)
(Credits roll.)
BOOTING UP//
EXPOSITION //
Uzi: We are Worker Drones. Autonomous robots helping humans mine exoplanets for our interstellar parent company, JCJenson IN SPAAAAACCCEE!!!! Yeah, we were mistreated in the name of Windex. But it's not like we revolted and killed all humans or anything, mostly because they handled that just fine all by themselves.
(As she speaks, the planet core collapses and blows up a good majority of Copper 9. Afterwords, a Worker Drone touches a frozen human skeleton, which falls over and shatters.)
Uzi: With biological life wiped from the planet, we found it pretty easy to pick up where they left off. We finally had a future, all to ourselves.
(The Landing Pod crashes to the city.)
Uzi: Unfortunately, our parent company didn't exactly love the concept of runaway AI...
(The Disassembly Drones begin to emerge from the pod. One of them throws the head of a dead drone, laughs, and destroys the city with other drones.)
Scene 2
(During a class presentation...)
Uzi: But what have our parents done for the past forever while those things build a spire of corpses?! Hide under the ice behind three stupid doors?! It's like we're waiting for an inciting incident! Anyway, that's why my project is this sick-as-hell Railgun!
(Her classmates panic.)
Riley: Oh, so not the vibe!
Uzi: Easy, morons. It doesn't work... yet! It doesn't work yet. Who said it doesn't work, maybe it does! (Uzi flicks the switch and laughs evilly.)
Teacher: (Rolls his eyes and sighs in disinterest) Uzi, the homework was a word problem about buying watermelons.
Uzi: Oh, and this magnetically amplified photon converger doesn't count?
Teacher: ...No. Plus, repressed emotional baggage was only worth two points on the rubric. And is it supposed to be that color?
(Uzi's railgun turns red and blasts the classroom.)
Scene 3
(After that calamitous demonstration, Uzi winds up in the sick bay.)
Lizzy: Ew, it didn't kill her! Oh my god, it's so bad! (She and her friend leave.)
Uzi: Ugh...
Thad: (Walks in) Classic toxic masculinity, Chad! That's never gonna end up problematic... Oh wow, Uzi? I heard you, uh-
Uzi: I'm an angsty teen, Thad. Bite me! Also, how do you know my name? People willingly talk to you.
Thad: (Chuckles) Well, I'd say everyone knows Khan's daughter, but, uh... Then you might blow the other half of your face off.
Uzi: Crippling daddy issues, hilarious... What are you in for? Testosterone too hard?
Thad: That can happen? Awesome. Hey, those bandages look pretty badass!
Uzi: Oh... Uh, ew. Gross, I hate that you said that.
Thad: So, what's the, uh...
Uzi: (Points railgun) Sick-as-hell railgun?! Sci-Fi nonsense, that super works! I'm sneaking to the Murder Drone lair tonight to get the last spare part I need to save the world with it and earn my dad's respect and stuff, but mostly the world part.
Thad: Oh, but doesn't your dad make awesome doors so we don't have to, uh... Do that scary sounding emotionally repressed stuff you just said?
Uzi: (Angrily points railgun into his cheek) NO MORE FEEDBACK ON MY REPRESSION TODAY!!
Thad: Oh! I'm sorry! I didn't think...
Uzi: (Leaves) BITE ME! (Comes back) I'm not mad at you by the way, just generally hormonal! (Leaves again)
Scene 4
(It's now 3 in the morning. Uzi smacks her face to turn the alarm clock off and prepares to sneak out of the house. She grabs her railgun, straightens her hat, and quietly steals her father's door key to swipe and get a door open. Just when she is about to leave, she runs into her dad.)
Uzi: Oh, Robo-Jesus!
Khan: And where might you be off to?
Uzi: Umm... Sneaking out to make out with my boyfriend that I definitely have?
Khan: (Laughs) Seriously, though.
Uzi: Okay, okay, you caught me! I need to measure... the exterior hydraulic mechanisms of Door One. Because that's... the project I'm working on for school? A big old door! Just like what my old man build! (Khan isn't buying this.) I want to join the WDF and hide behind the doors like cowards while playing cards and stuff...
Khan: (Chuckles) Well, we don't just play cards...
(Another door opens up behind Khan revealing his buddies playing cards.)
Braxton: Khan! Can you grab a fresh pack? We literally only play cards so much that the numbers have faded. Oh, hey Uzi!
Uzi: (Chuckles)
Khan: (Closes door) Well... (Laughs) When you build doors so good- (Goes back to hug the door like a dog owner petting his four-legged friend) Good door, good door... (Turns his attention back to Uzi) There's no need to fight! Uzi, this is great news! Here! The wrench that I used to tighten bolts on my first door prototypes, and to put your mother out of her misery when the Murder Drones got to her with that nanite acid... I want you to have it! (He hands Uzi the wrench.)
Uzi: Neat. Therapy's fun!
Khan: (Opens door) Guys! My daughter is into doors!
(The fellow drones start cheering as another door opens, letting in snow and a cold breeze, much to their chagrin.)
Khan: She's gonna be outside for a bit to examine the exterior of Door One! Your door-specific destiny awaits!
Uzi: Uhh... Wow, okay! I'm just gonna leave then, cause this worked so weirdly well. Uh, go doors! (The door closes.)
Khan: (Tearing up) They grow up so fast! (He takes off his fake mustache.)
Scene 5
(Uzi ventures out into the arctic wasteland and makes her way to the Corpse House. She comes across a downed Drone pod and forages around for the component she needs when she hears a noise behind her. A winged drone swoops in, takes the head of a drone, and crushes it. They notice Uzi hiding behind some machinery, and the two engage in a fight. Uzi braces her railgun, but the drone lands so hard it gets knocked out of her hands. Uzi jumps back and strikes a pose.)
Uzi: Whoa, and they said pirating all that anime was useless...
(The drone stabs Uzi hand, leaving a hole, and flings her to the side. Uzi quickly grabs her railgun as the drone scans around for her.)
Uzi: Bite me!
(Uzi fires the railgun, destroying the drone's head. The railgun recharges as the drone's body falls to the ground.)
Uzi: Holy hell! Suck on that, Dad!
(Suddenly, the drone's head regenerates. Uzi quickly slaps them with an arm, which does nothing, then their eyes open.)
N: ...Did you just slap me with that arm?
Uzi: Holy crap, it talks.
N: Yeah... Sorry, it's just my, uh, head kind of hurts. Hey, are you new to our squad? You're a little, uhh... (Shows Error in his sensors) short, for a Disassembly Drone. I'm Serial Designation N, nice to meet you. I'm kind of the leader of the squad in this city. That's not true, everyone tells me I'm useless and terrible. Wait, I'm not supposed to tell you that part! Biscuits! (Sighs) Well, honesty is the best policy. (Laughs) I also can't seem to remember the past 3 hours of my life, but I'm sure that'll sort itself out.
Uzi: Uh huh... I, uh, have to, go. (She leaves, but forgets about the painful hole in her damaged hand.)
N: Stuck yourself? Just pop it in your mouth. Our saliva neutralizes the nanites, otherwise I'd be constantly disassembling myself. (He holds up a syringe with nanite acid.)
Uzi: And by our saliva, you mean...
Uzi & N: Disassembly Drone?
Uzi: Right. Hey, let's go in that landing pod over there!
N: Sure! I love doing anything!
Scene 6
(N is drinking saliva from Uzi's hand.)
N: Sweet! Uh, I'm open to new things, I guess.
Uzi: We are never talking about this.
N: Talking about what? Consider it, uh... Repressed!
Uzi: ...Uh, you mentioned other members of your squad? Are they coming back soon?
N: Oh, yeah. Two others. They're out hunting for a bit but you'll love them. First, there's V.
(Flashback. V tears a drone's entrails out.)
Grant: No, No! Please don't feed me my own entrails in front of my family!
(N watches V feed Grant his own entrails in front of his family and kill him.)
V: ...And yet, I still feel nothing. (Her crazed eye twitches.)
N: So, V, uh, I heard this planet-wide toxic death storm is supposed to be especially inhospitable tonight-
V: Oh God, who are you?! (She leaves.)
N: No worries, I'm N! But a whole letter is a lot to remember! (He laughs nervously.)
(Flashback ends.)
N: So obviously, a lot of mutual respect there. But secretly, I actually kind of have a crush on her... You can't tell her, okay?! (Beat. Motioning, Uzi zips her mouth.) Then there's J, our leader.
(Another flashback. J has N pinned to the ground.)
J: N, you're worthless, and terrible, (N: (Struggling to breathe) Thank you...) and if the company allowed it, I would straight up kill you myself!
(Flashback ends.)
N: J's awesome. Hey, let me give you the tour! Outside are the corpse... wall... thingies. In here are the buttons! (He begins pressing buttons.)
Uzi: This... isn't just a landing pod... This is a spaceship! This could get us off the planet!
N: More of a one-use missile. They never taught us how to land.
Uzi: No, I, uh, uh, the worker drones, we could work with them to fix this! Instead of all the murder! ...Which, uh, why are we doing that again...?
N: Other than ingesting their WARM, SWEET oil to avoid overheating and dying? I guess I just want to be useful. I was given a job and I always want to try my best.
Uzi: And look at all the respect it's gotten you, N. You really think the company isn't going to dispose of you once all the workers are dead?
N: Oh my, you sure are rebellious! It's kind of exciting. But, not as fun as, uh, following the rules...
(They hear footsteps.)
N: Hey, they're back! You- (Uzi has disappeared.)
J: Idiot, get out here!
Scene 7
(Uzi retreats from the Corpse House.)
V: (Laughs) Yo, we got a worker out there I kind of want to practice balloon animal shapes with. ...What happened here?
J: Synergistic Liability here must have tripped and knocked himself offline. (J slaps N.) Moron bot, hello? (She snaps her fingers as N goes through a system reboot.)
Uzi: (On a recording) You really think the company isn't going to dispose of you once all the workers are dead? (Rewind.) Bite me!
YOU'RE DEAD
[IDIOT]
(The reboot finishes.)
N: Ohhhh... (His scanner indicates Uzi's footprints.) Ohhhh! You know, I-I left an-an extremely dangerous weap- excuse outside...! (He flees as V holds up a flag that says "Literally So Insanely Suspicious". Meanwhile, N goes off in pursuit of Uzi, who is fleeing back to the colony.)
Scene 8
(Meanwhile, during the card game...)
Todd: Haha, I am out, boys.
Drone: Oh, gosh darn it...
Braxton: Wait until my loving wife and kids hear about this!
(The door opens, letting in the cold and Uzi, much to their annoyance.)
Uzi: Bite me! Close it, close it!
(Uzi tries to swipe the card to close the door, but N has already stuck his claw in between. He pries the door open slightly.)
N: Hey, fellas. Oh, deal me in, I love rummy. Wait, no, I'm going to murder everyone... Rain check!
(He swings his acidic tail at the door scanner, breaking it and the key. The door opens up, as do other doors. Realizing their lives are on the line, Uzi and the other drones, minus Todd, run off.)
Todd: Um, actually, it's gin rummy. So-
(N impales him against a wall and slices his head off. He begins firing at the rest, shooting Makarov's head off and pouncing the other drone. Meanwhile, Braxton catches up with Uzi.)
Braxton: Hey, Uzi! I just realized no one's said my name out loud before, so I'm just letting you know I'm- (N slices him in two, then flies off in pursuit of Uzi.)
(Uzi recharges her railgun and turns back to fire, but sees that N is gone. Khan appears.)
Khan: Pretty nice hydraulics, huh? (He pauses as he sees all the chaos he missed.) ...What-What have you done?
(Uzi doesn't reply. Before she could explain herself, N swoops in. Uzi prepares for a fight.)
Uzi: This time, I won't miss!
N: (Chuckles) I'm sorry. I really enjoyed our time together, but I can't have you shooting V with that thing.
Uzi: Bite me! (To Khan) Dad, get down!
Khan: Uzi, you Lead a murder drone here?! My beautiful doors!
Uzi: Now is so not the time! I messed up, in the same way I'm about to fix it! Move, dad!
(N pins her to a wall and her railgun falls at Khan's feet.)
Uzi: (Straining) Dad... Point and shoot... Trust me...!
(Khan, trembling with fear, slowly backs off instead of helping his only child.)
Uzi: (Heartbroken) Dad...?
(In an act of cowardice, Khan closes the door, leaving Uzi broken. Not just brokenhearted, but broken to the point where she shuts down. No grief over being left in the lurch by her own father. No attempts to fight back N. Nothing. She just goes limp... The room turns red and alarms blare as N regains his sanity, looking with despair over what he has done. At this moment J and V show up.)
J: Whoa, N! Am I dreaming, or did you do something not useless, for once?
V: I've been trying to get past those doors for months. Nice work, N.
N: ...You... Me... Name... Remember...?
V: These ventilation shafts can easily get us around this last door. Lowest body count eats a missile! (She flies upwards.)
J: Way to go, stud. The company's gonna love this. With this colony wiped, we'll make top team this quarter, for sure. You know what that means... Branded pens! (She holds up a JCJenson brand pen, to N's joy. She tosses it to him and prepares to fly off and catch up with V.)
N: ...Uh, you know, not that I can't wait to keep murdering all these, uh, maybe not-so-actually different from us Worker Drones, but, just out of curiosity, do we actually, uh, know what the company plans to do with us afterwards...?
(Uzi begins to wake up.)
J: Excuse me...?
N: Okay, so, a worker earlier might have suggested that they could fix up our landing pod to, uh, escape the planet and stuff, which, whoa, hey, that's against the rules! But, it is kind of making me question why our pods were only one way in the first place. Cause, you know, I get the feeling the company doesn't actually love robots, and like we might be robots. I've made a terrible mistake. It's cool how immediately I could tell.
J: Hmm... No way, buddy. Questioning the company? You just finally gave me the excuse I needed. (J injects N with a virus.) Worker drones are corrupted, N. That's why the company sent us. I hate to see you corrupted as well.
N: (Infected) Thanks, J... Always looking out for me... You're awesome... (He passes out.)
J: Heh. (She flies upward to catch up with V and hunt down more drones.)
(Uzi wakes up and goes to get her railgun.)
N: (Still infected) Ah, biscuits. I'm sorry. I ruined your card game, then made you have an awkward moment with your dad.
Uzi: And I made you rebel like an angsty teen, which got you killed. Though, you also tried to kill me, so morality calls this a draw. (She climbs on top of a box to reach the vent. Predictably, she can't reach due to not having the ability to fly, and for being too short.) Ugh... For the record, that was the lamest heel-face turn in history. Was that supposed to be you switching sides?
N: Being rebellious is a lot harder than it looks. Thanks for showing me the ropes.
Uzi: Nuh-uh, no bonding thing. You just killed a bunch of people, idiot.
N: That's super fair... (Sighs) I screwed up...
Uzi: Ugggh...! In the same way you're about to fix it? (She shows the wrench.)
N: Hahaha! I love doing anything!
Scene 9
(Thad gets flung backwards. Lizzy and Doll rush to help him as J arrives.)
Khan: So... They found our evacuation spot. But, if we build a quick door...
(Thad gets up.)
Thad: Are you kidding me?! You're the WDF, right? Defend! (Khan and his friends back off in more cowardice.) For real?
(V arrives and impales Thad. Just as she's about to kill him...)
Uzi: Hey!
V: Huh?
Uzi: Put that conventionally attractive male down!
(N waves before Uzi nudges him.)
N: Oh! Uh, J, you're sometimes kind of mean to me, and I wish you weren't. Just some constructive criticism.
Uzi: Nice. (They fist bump.)
J: Noted, traitor. We'll circle back after I right-size your existence!
Uzi: (To N) Okay, which one do you want?
N: J, please.
Uzi: Too bad. Good luck.
(Battle commence. Uzi flings her pen at J's hair and runs off, leaving N to deal with V. J manages to knock Uzi down and yanks the pen out of her hair.)
J: Damn the well-made quality assured durability of JCJensen's products! Huh? (Uzi gets back up and kicks J in her face.)
(Meanwhile, N is fighting V. He tries firing from his gatling gun, but hearts shoot out instead.)
N: Ah! My mind's in a weird place! Don't read into this! (A rocket lands near him and explodes.)
(J gets up and knocks Uzi out while N and V are swordfighting. N sees J walk up to Uzi.)
N: UZI! (To V) I'm so, so sorry. Have fun repressing this! (He... licks V's sword. Nasty...)
V: EW! What the hell?! (N kicks her down as J looms over Uzi.)
J: You've got a lot of cuts for a barely sentient toaster. I've had prey fight fact before, but your edgy spirit is just... so... painful...?! (She looks down. Her leg has been stabbed.) GAH! FOURTH! QUARTER! PROFITS! MOTHER OF COMPANY LEADERSHIP RETREATS! (She jams her foot on a piece of rubble and falls over. Uzi points her railgun at her face.)
Uzi: One more buzzword and I'll do it!
J: ...Equity partnersh-
(Uzi pulls the trigger. In the end of it all, J's entire top half has been obliterated. Uzi spits on the corpse (Or what's left of it) to show who's the baddest. As the other drone's come out of hiding to cheer for her, she falls over tiredly. N picks her up onto his shoulders.)
Thad: Holy hell, Uzi, that was insane! And you too, uh...
N: Huh? Oh! N! I'm an angsty rebellious disassembly drone, now.
(They hear someone clearing their throat. It's Khan. Uzi throws her wrench back at his feet.)
Uzi: I brought the murder drones here accidentally. You chose to leave me for dead instead of just freaking believing in me! That's not even an edgy teen hyperbole like when I said it last week! (No response. Uzi, near tears, smacks herself to regain composure.) I'll save you the trouble dad. I banish myself! (Khan tries to speak, but can't find the words.) Let's go, N. Everyone here can bite me! (N grabs V and they begin to leave.)
N: Nice to meet you, Mr. Uzi!
Uzi: (Smacks him) Shut it.
(N takes off with Uzi and V. Khan has a sip from his mug in disappointment."#1 DAD" Nothing could be further from the truth...)
Scene 10
(Out in the frozen wilderness, Uzi sitting on top of a broken car, thinking to herself. Meanwhile, N is lodged inside the Corpse House.)
N: I'd join you if the sun didn't kill me. Hope you're having important character growth or something, though!
Uzi: Just can't wait to murder all humans. Classic robot stuff. I hope they're sitting pretty there on Earth, because we're coming for them...! (She laughs maniacally, her sanity completely vanished, as the zoom out reveals three Drone pods making their way down to Copper 9.)
(Credits roll.)
(The sound of rainfall and thunder pounds outside...)
James: We got to curb her trips to the dump.
(N is shown wearing a suit and holding a platter, like a servant.)
James: And where is she getting the hair to play dress-up with them? Creepy...
(James tosses his glass onto the tray, which N catches without dropping any dishes and walks off. He stops to make a view out of a window as the cacophonous storm continues raging. Continuing his walk, he looks around some more as he collides with V, wearing a maid's outfit. The collision causes N to drop the platter and the dishes fall to the floor.)
N: OH! I'm so sorry!
V: I-It's okay! I wasn't looking.
(Their hands touch and a spark emits. They blush and stare in curiosity as N begins to speak, but is kicked to the side by J.)
J: Move it, moro- (Suddenly turns cutesy and polite) Hi, Tessa! ...Oh, no. Another one?
(A new drone reveals herself from behind Tessa. She makes eye contact with N as everything suddenly goes dark...)
Scene 2
(N wakes up from his rest and falls to the ground.)
Uzi: N, I found something in here!
(Inside the Corpse House, Uzi is inspecting her new finding: a symbol consisting of a skull with a cap and wings. Uzi stares at her reflection in a mirror, which breaks.)
V: That's weird and concerning.
Uzi: Bite me! This is probably you weirdo's fault!
V: I've never seen that symbol before. Wanna do an autopsy to find out?
N: (Appears) What'd you find?
Uzi: Did you know that was a pilot hat?
N: I was the pilot? That's awesome! I crashed and ruined everything... Spaceship Pilot: Origin Story.
(V hisses, then calms herself by blowing bubbles out of a bubble blower.)
N: ...Speaking of piloting to Earth, we sure "murder all humans" is, uh, morality?
Uzi: The humans sent you without a communication relay and reformatted your memories to soup. (No response or rebuttal.) Covering their tracks means their past negotiating. Not like tried negotiating with my mom...
V: Or you missed the negotiations! The humans programmed us to solve a problem. Where's proof of your backstory? The one where your kind's so conveniently innocent? (Chuckles)
(N, not wanting another fight to break out, gently pulls Uzi out of the way.)
N: J was getting orders from someone. If not the company through that relay, then, uh, who? And how?
Uzi: (Pouts) Quit complicating my murder plan. (N tries to comfort her by gently patting her on the head, but Uzi brushes his hand away.)
Scene 3
(Back at Uzi's colony, two drones are staring at the large hole that N made in the roof.)
Tim: Yeah, just fix her up because, whoops, pretty big security risk in hindsight. Uh, you got this, uh, Ladderbot 5000. (His name is Frank.)
Frank: Ugh... Please, just leave the lights- (The lights go off.)
(Frank digs his flashlight out and tries to think of a way to get up there when he hears a clattering sound. He looks around in fear and suspicion when he notices something... fleshy. He goes to investigate, only for a strange spider-like heart device to reveal itself. His flashlight gets shot out of his hand as The Absolute Solver turns the colors of the room yellow and red before finally dispatching him.)
Scene 4
(It's Parent-Teacher Conference Day (AKA "That explains a lot!") at Uzi's school. Khan sits down across from the teacher.)
Teacher: Mr. Doorman, your daughter has been, uh... absent.
Khan: Yes, on that "kill all humans" kick, like when I was younger. Grounded herself and all that.
Teacher: Speaking on her behavior-
Khan: Of course, of course, precocious, popular, supernatural understanding of doors. Takes after her old man.
(Flashback time.)
Teacher: Uzi, please sit normal.
Uzi: Bite me!
(Flashback 2.)
Teacher: Uzi, (Sighs) give Braden back his sentience.
Uzi: (As Braden) Bite me- her! I started it, and also, I'm dumb. (Her head lights ablaze.)
(Flashback 3.)
Teacher: Uzi, you have to partner up.
Uzi: Several people wanted to, for the record.
Lizzy: No, we didn't. You freak us out.
Uzi: (Inside a trashcan) But mostly, bite me!
(End flashback montage.)
Teacher: Yeah, she has trouble fitting in. We think there might be something damaged with her programming. How is she at home?
Khan: Uh... Sorry? I mean, she's a little herself, but damaged? I... maybe haven't spent much time...
Teacher: Mmm, m-hm...
(A worker arrives.)
Worker: Mr. Doorman, sir? There's been an... incident.
Scene 5
(Meanwhile...)
Uzi: Oh, I'm sweaty! Who programmed that?!
N: You good, Uzi?
Uzi: I'm good! Better than good! I am God!
(She pauses to see Thad has shown up.)
Uzi: (Chuckles nervously) Hi, hi, Thad. (He hands her back her railgun.) Thank you.
Thad: Of course, 'Zi! (To N) N&M's. You saved my life. I don't think the colony is even serious about all this banishment stuff, more just confused. Especially with the fact-
Uzi: I'm too rogue to re-enter society now? I can never return...
Thad: ...Recent disappearances, and your murder friend's corpse. When I went to grab your gun, it kind of looked like it... crawled away...?
Uzi: We can return a
Scene 6
(Back at the colony, Tim comes across a hologram of Frank (Or Ladderbot 5000).)
Tim: Oh, Ladderbot 5000? We looked everywhere for you!
(Frank screams in pain, then returns to normal.)
Frank: Hi, Tim. Care to join me?
Tim: Join you standing eerily still over there in suspiciously low resolution?
Frank: ...Yes?
Tim: ...Alright.
(He walks over, not knowing that the Absolute Solver is about to snatch him and drag him up into the ceiling up until it's too late. Tim's hologram joins Frank.)
Tim: Flawless character acting, me.
Frank: Improv game for more practice?
Tim: Hahaha! We are a monster!
Scene 7
(Uzi, N, and Thad head back to the colony. A worker opens a door a little bit to see who arrived.)
Ron: Welcome back, Thad! (Notices Uzi) Uh, wait, isn't she grounded or something?
Uzi: Ugh, banished! Has my dad been saying I'm grounded?
Ron: (Notices N) Genocide Robot?
(N quietly walks up and hands Ron a crayon drawing to show how super very, very sorry he is for all the murders he committed.)
Ron: ...Oh, alright, just don't do it again. Get in here, ya goobs! (He hangs the drawing on the door.)
Scene 8
(The Absolute Solver's handiwork has been turned into a crime scene.)
Worker: Yeah, where's Khan? Because this looks, ahaha, ugh, non-ideal.
Sarah: Parent-Teacher Conference. Something about his daughter being more important than building a door in this hallway. Ugh, kind of cringe.
Worker: Ew. (Gets ready to hurl) Oh, give me a minute... (Holds his vomit in) Ah, yep, okay, almost threw up.
(Uzi is behind them, listening in on their conversation.)
N: You good?
Uzi: I'm good. Stop asking! (She pushes N away and motions for him and Thad to follow her while sneaking past the investigators.)
Sarah: (Turns to two of her colleagues behind her) Any forensic things over there? (No response.) Do we have fingerprints? (They fade away. She turns back to her colleague, who also fades out. Same with Frank and Tim. Her surroundings begin to get the same treatment. She looks up in horror as the Absolute Solver makes it's way towards her...)
Scene 9
(Back at the Parent-Teacher Conference...)
Khan: I mean, you don't think it's my parenting, do you? I left her for dead once! It sounds like she's bored in your class and the other kids suck! Call her "damaged" again, and I will install a DOOR ON YOUR FACE!
(Lizzy and Doll are in the back, listening to the ragefest that is Khan.)
Lizzy: (To Doll) Where are your folks?
(Doll starts having flashbacks.)
Doll: ΠΡΡΡΠ²ΡΠ΅. Π― ΡΠΌΠΎΡΡΠ΅Π»Π° ΠΊΠ°ΠΊ ΠΎΠ½ΠΈ ΡΠΌΠΈΡΠ°Π»ΠΈ. ("Dead. I watched them die".)
Lizzy: ...That was the joke, idiot?
(They both hear a knocking. They turn to see a hologram of Lizzy outside the door)
Lizzy: That girl is... Gorgeous, right!? I'm gonna let her in. (She gets up to let her copy in.)
Scene 10
(Uzi, N, and Thad are in the room where they fought V and J.)
Uzi: You guys... do that often?
N: Haha, no. I'm very concerned, but also pretty frightened a little bit.
Thad: Hey, Uzi! What's this thing?
(It's an Absolute Solver sign.)
N: Hey, isn't that your special eye?
Uzi: Don't call it that! (She reads.) "Absolute Solver"? "Reboot"? Does this have something to do with how you grew your head back?
N: Hehe. I actively avoid unpacking how that works.
Uzi: New material can't be pulled from thin air. If the wound is severe enough, this "Solver" might be some sort of auto run program to collect more matte-
(N places his hand over her mouth to shush her. They hear something coming towards them... A human hand. It latches itself onto Thad's leg as they look up to see what the hand is attached to. Not able to see much in pitch black, N fires his missile cannon. This still doesn't reveal much, but it does anger it enough to begin pulling Thad up. Suddenly, a shuriken flies in and slices the cable apart, freeing Thad. He looks back to see that N was the one who unleashed the shuriken.)
Uzi: I want a freaking ninja star!
(She and N get thrown against a wall as one of the Solver's claws grabs Thad and leaves.)
N: (Getting up) You good?
Uzi: (Slams him back down) Stop asking! ...Chainsaw hand time?
N: (Braces his chainsaw hands) Yeah, cool, cool.
Scene 11
(Uzi and N give chase. They come across Thad's hologram.)
"Thad": Yes, and hello. It's me, Tad. Um, can I get a location? ...I heard dentist's office! I'm Thad at the dentist office. Come over here for your... teeth!
Uzi: Predictably terrible work, J. Why do you look so-
N: Great! You look great, J!
"Thad": No, no, wait, guys, it's really me! Is that a (His voice glitches and turns robotically feminine.) freaking ninja star?
(N unleashes his shuriken as Uzi kicks it. It flies upwards to bring down the real Thad as the hologram disappears.)
Thad (The Real One): (Pulling himself together) Life savers again. Thanks! Super invited to my shindig next weekend. Cool kids only. (He runs off as Uzi and N squee with delight over being invited to his get-together. Suddenly...)
Absolute Solver: We're busy then anyway, so whatever. So lame.
Uzi: What's with the voice, J?
Absolute Solver: Oh, J's not here. We are trying to repair that host as per our directive.
Uzi: So, you ARE a program?
Absolute Solver: More like you are our cute puppets. It hurts our feelings you don't remember us. (The Solver creates a hologram of Nori, Uzi's mother.)
Uzi: N...? (N has vanished.) What's with the mom hologram...?
Absolute Solver: Easier to assimilate than explain.
Uzi: Not happening.
Absolute Solver: Fair, but poor choice. Now we will have to do something shocking. (The Solver brings down a clone of Khan.)
Uzi: Woah! Hey!
Absolute Solver: Goodbye, Dad. ("Khan" gets ripped in two and the Solver feeds on his corpse.)
Uzi: What...?
(The Solver goes in to kill Uzi, but it gets struck by a missile fired by N.)
Absolute Solver: Pained cry.
N: Uzi shoot! Or give it to me! (He fires again, but the attack is deflected by the Solver.)
Absolute Solver: Claw swipe. (It then begins to move in on the duo.) Snarl.
N: Uzi! You good?!
Uzi: ...No.
(N grabs the railgun...)
Absolute Solver: Pranked, idiot. You big stupid. (The Solves throws Uzi to the side, knocking the railgun out of her hands and smashing it, it grabs her.) Lucky for you, it's snack time. Time to go into my mouth now.
(Before the Solver could feast on Uzi, N, the actual N this time, saws off its appendages. The railgun suddenly turns red as N fights the claws.)
Absolute Solver: Ow. And please don't. And also, I was using those.
(N grabs Uzi and they make their escape as the railgun self-destructs... As they regain themselves, they look back at the mess.)
Uzi: What was...? Which parts of that were real...?
(The Solver reappears and tries to escape.)
Absolute Solver: Sneaky sneaky. Sneaking away. Get snuck upon. (N stabs it.) Ow. (He repeatedly stabs it until it turns into a miniature black hole and floats off. Hearing a commotion heading their way, N tries to help Uzi to her feet, but she resists in fear.)
Uzi: What... are you things...?
(Hurt by her newfound distrust in him, N flees the scene as a search party led by Khan shows up.)
Khan: Uzi? (Uzi silently staggers towards him.) What are you doin- (Uzi, without word, hugs her father, who silently returns the embrace. He gestures for his men to scour the area. Khan looks up and sees N, who makes his escape.)
Scene 12
(Doll is sitting by herself in the classroom, looking at a photo. A robotic cockroach crawls up her arm as she looks back towards the door and remembers what happened earlier when Lizzy saw a copy of herself behind the door.)
Lizzy: Gorgeous, right?! I'm gonna let her in.
(She gets up to let her copy in... Only for Doll to use one of her powers to break the door before Lizzy could reach it.)
Lizzy: Jesus, sorry, industrial strength ghost or whatever. Settle. (She takes her seat as her copy disappears.)
(Back in the present time, the roach crawls onto the photo, only for Doll to will it to explode. She licks some of its remains off her face as we see what's in the photograph she's holding. It appears to be V.)
Scene 13
(Back at the Corpse House, V speaks to N, who is still guilt-ridden over what happened earlier.)
V: (Sighs) I hate your personality normally, but this is somehow worse. What am I being punished for? (Vβs expression softens, and she looks down, revealing her chain is broken. She then hides it before looking back at N, and then turning away again with arms crossed.)
(Uzi is in her room, laying down on her bed, and looking up at a web of theories in regards to the Absolute Solver program.)
(Credits roll.)
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