#but to me it is the max daniel thesis

[blamemma]

daniel ricciardo and max verstappen, 2024 vs. 2016

[yesloulou]

True or False w/ Ziggo Sport: I sometimes consider Max as my little brother

(thank u @ef-1 for helping me find this clip you're amazing 😳❤️)

[transbrucewayne]

F1 but it’s ultra specific ship dynamics that I need in order to enjoy the ship:

Versainz: baby’s first situationship (literally pentaltyboxbox’s art is my versainz thesis. “Ay, Max, no. I am not gay and neither are you” 🤨) teammates who weren’t supposed to like each other reluctantly becoming friends and then being intricately connected for the rest of their careers. But totally not in a gay way. Of course.

Chestappen: repressed catholic and some guy who needs dilf pussy so bad he wants to kill himself (this is deeply important to me)

Strollonso: Brat princess Lance. Heros and anti-heroes. I’m on the dark side. Tell Lance not to worry I just want to build a gap with the cars behind. You’re my fucking hero.

Carlando: Baby’s first situationship pt.2?? Lando with a massive crush, first real boyfriend Carlos….i need there to be angst. Lando fell first AND harder, etc.

Britcedes/Gewis: George fumbling all over himself trying to impress Lewis, Lewis just thinking he’s cute no matter what. It’s the coolest man alive/weird little freak he’s obsessed with pairing of my dreams. George: this is my boyfriend he’s cooler than me and also he’s cooler than all of you.

Maxiel: first love married divorced remarried pining missing something that maybe was never there will they won’t they one big game of gay chicken healing from baby’s first situationship etc etc etc (I adore them)

Dando: trying to find solace in another, longing for someone you can’t get back, subversion of expected dynamics (controversial: I fully believe Lando tops in this one). But also. They need to have one brain cell. Lando blabbing on about god knows what. Daniel sweating and popping a vein bc of how much he needs to kiss him.

Twinklaren/Landoscar: third time’s the charm, oh you’re the one I’ve been waiting for, tender glances, young love, first teammate crush syndrome

Danterri: we had something weird in the past. “Find another weed guy I can’t fuck with you…uhhhmm nothing personal I can’t fall in love right now and youre Everything I love so if I ever see you again I’ll never let go of your hand sooo yeah” (we’ve all seen that one web weaving.) Are you dating the female version of me?

Lecciardo: WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED IN VEGAS. Charles needs dick from a guy with unstoppable charisma soooooo bad. Fueling each other’s impulsive sides, etc etc

Sebchal: baby’s first situationship (Charles’ version) (from the vault) I miss you so much I’m going to listen to breakup songs all night long. I still think of you every day. I named you twice in a list of drivers. You may even kiss. If it was the omegaverse Seb is so obviously an alpha.

Brocedes: if it doesn’t make me physically sick to my stomach with anguish I do not want it. I hope you die I hope we both die. Hand in unlovable hand. I still consider him my best friend in my heart. We’re not friends. Are they lovers? Worse.

Chewis (Charles/Lewis. I recognise this is also the name for Checo/Lewis. What is the Charles/Lewis name?) me and the bad bitch I pulled by being in violation of that one article section. You know the post. They suffer together. Kinship in joint pain. You’ve got a long future ahead of you. Praise kink.

Let me know if you want a part 2, if so, send ships you want!

[adimouze]

I think ricnation on twitter should stop and accept max's interview, it may be his pr or his real thoughts, we should just let it go because we know max and daniel are very special to each other and if checo's fans are happy with that then we should just ignore them and stop bothering them. I'm being honest some people are too fussy about little things like this. For me seeing checo fail every race is the ultimate victory because it's too ridiculous if we take every word these drivers say to heart.

lmao true true also like max wasn't posting post race helicopter videos with anyone else was he hehe. anyways i think nearly a decade of good maxiel shit can handle a little bit of teasing from the other side. (i do get why people get pissed tho, some checo fans are ruthless) daniel obviously is very comfortable enough to know what max is actually thinking, and if max's teammate was so close to him he would have been offered to write that thesis/love letter. But who did actually write that?? hehe.

honestly i think it's because the qualifying was so shit and daniel is always so popular (and that gets engagement on twitter) that even his little cuntiel shitstirrer comments are now main news.

[thearchercore]

Hello, hello. It's my first time writing you something but I can't help after skipping (don't blame me, I'm not the biggest fan) Dts. It is very clear that Dts favours some drivers (like Lando, Carlos and Daniel), while others do not even have 2 minutes of screentime (even if you are the WC winner). I also realised that some drivers who had more screentime in earlier seasons like Charles or Checo did not get as much this year. And now I can not help thinking about your thesis with drivers who fall into "media drivers" and "racing drivers". It is very clear who is all for racing and who is not. Sorry for this long as post, but this was on my mind.

(And Netflix, where the hell is the "Charlie" moment? I know you have it!!!)

yeah! @valyrfia pretty much clocked it in her grid dynamics essay

truth be told, drive to survive is a show and each show (even unscripted) will have protagonists, main characters, and manipulated storylines. for DTS, they will always push individuals like daniel and gunther, so it's no surprise. also the ferrari episode was really funny because charles can't pretend to save his life so the dinner with fred and carlos was just a badly acted out convo in 4k lol.

we have to remember, drive to survive will aim for drama, not racing. they will show moments in the races just to support the narrative they're trying to push. that explains why max had like 5 minutes of screentime & was only shown winning abu dhabi. why we spent 2 episodes of tensions in alpine and did not see anything from qatar or the triple header (except for checo's crash)

seems like they're perhaps trying to push a storyline of charles being the ferrari beloved, so when lewis comes in he can have the underdog storyline but who knows, i wouldnt take it too seriously lol

[onboardsorasora]

https://www.tumblr.com/onboardsorasora/760887271328301056/formularicciardo-daniels-intro-at-the-us-gp

Max just standing there with his hands on his hips and waiting for Daniel to come always makes me laugh

Lmao I don't think I ever noticed him just standing there enjoying Daniel's excitement loool maxiel thesis

[f0point5]

Uhhh tell me why you think Daniel is Down Bad coded. I see him more as a The Prophecy kinda guy

Oh have I been WAITING for this question because I will die on this hill (also the prophecy is so Charles)

✨Daniel Ricciardo x Down Bad - A Thesis✨

“Did you really beam me up?

In a cloud of sparkling dust,

Just to do experiments on,

Tell me I was the chosen one”

Daniel to RB. They chose him when they were coming off this period of being unbeatable, chose him when they had their pick of drivers. Chose him to drive alongside their golden boy like he could be their next one.

“Then sent me back where I came from,

For a moment I knew cosmic love”

How when the real golden boy came they started to relegate him to second driver. Right after he had become their number one after Vettel. Right when he'd had a taste of what he wanted, they started to take it away.

“Now I'm down bad crying at the gym,

Everything comes out teenage petulance,

"What if I can't have him"

I might just die, it would make no difference,"

From the moment he realised that it was Max they were really betting on, he started acting out, seeing slights everywhere (eg. how he talked about how he felt him being even partially blamed for Baku 2018 was unfair and evidence of favouritism to Max), throwing his toys out of the pram, “teenage petulance”, because nothing felt fair anymore. The attitude of, "well if I can't be him, if I can't be number one here then I don'twant to be here at all. Would they even care if I left?"

“In a field in my same old town,

That somehow seems so hollow now”

The Red Bull second seat was where he'd started but it didn't feel good enough anymore. What was once an honour now felt like mocking.

“They'll say I'm nuts if I talk about the existence of you,

For a moment I was heaven struck”

History will not remember him as a Red Bull golden boy. They'll talk about Max followed Vettel and how Daniel bridged the gap. But he knows that for a moment he was dipped in gold

“How dare you think it's romantic,

Leaving me safe and stranded”

They never wanted him to leave, but it felt unfair that they would think he could stay. Sure, he was safe, he was what they wanted him to be, but he wasn't what he wanted to be. How could they think he could accept that?

In conclusion, for me that song fits his relationship with Red Bull most, Down Bad and Loml.

[herohimbowhore]

Smile by Maisie Peters can be used to explain Daniel Ricciardo from 2018 to the end of 2020, as well as Red Bull's search for someone to replace Daniel and fill the hole he left within the team.

By now, we've all grown aware of how unexpected Daniel leaving Red Bull was and the rapid driver change-ups that followed in his wake.

I think it's evident that Red Bull was not prepared to replace Daniel. From everything that we've learned about contract negotiations, Red Bull was expecting to re-sign Daniel.

Got bridges to burn and places to run

Yeah, this smile is a loaded gun

There was an hour-long private meeting with Dietrich Mateschitz, after which both Dietrich and Daniel came back smiling and it was thought that the contract was all but signed. During the meeting, Dietrich offered Daniel a matching salary to Max and reaffirmed it after learning what they were paying Max.

It's my party, my body, my business

It's my town and my crown and my hitlist

It's my world and you're just living in it

Daniel left Red Bull when no one expected him to, and in hindsight, yeah it was a bad decision. However, given the information available at the time, it didn't seem like the worst decision ever. Like, yes, Renault had its issues, but they were offering to build a team around him and were giving him a very nice contract.

Leaving Renault after 2020 seemed like a questionable decision after all that they had promised him. However, in hindsight, it was a decent decision because Alpine is a disaster and a half on a good day and to be honest there's not been many good days recently. Their 100 race plan is more like a 100 ways to not have a team.

No more Mrs. Sweet and Miss Nice

No more Mrs. Fuckin' Polite

Time for Mrs. Takin' What's Mine

You don't need him

Daniel since he has returned to the Red Bull ecosystem and started to love the sport again has made it very clear that he wants Checo's seat. There are several articles, interviews, and podcast appearances in which Daniel continues to confirm that he is indeed trying for that Red Bull seat. And despite what people may think, he has put in the results that would begin the conversations about moving to the main team, especially after the awful year that Checo has had. The pace that Daniel has shown in the AlphaTauri is not insignificant, while it didn't translate to points finishes as much as he may have liked, it shows what Daniel Ricciardo can do when you give him the car.

If he tries to control me, he's finished

Won't be crying, there's plenty of fishes

And I, and I, and I'm fishin'

You should know that you won't find another

I think Will Buxton has said it best: "And I think Red Bull has probably come to the realization that the only driver who can replace Daniel, is Daniel." Will Buxton goes on to say that if they can bring the Daniel of old back, then Red Bull will stick him back in the car to drive alongside Max because the Daniel/Max driver lineup was one of the best that Red Bull has had. Red Bull, since 2019, has been trying to fill the space Daniel left and for a time they've done so with Checo. However, after the disastrous 2023 season, there are so many questions about whether Checo is the person for that seat. Especially if the other teams do close the gap and don't drop the ball like they did this year.

______

Just a short analysis from my drafts that I thought I would post in celebration of submitting my Master's Thesis. Just two more final papers and I'll be done with grad school.

[blamemma]

not to be saddo on main but truly for me the thesis of maxiel is fond. that's all it is. it's max growing up in a sport with daniel as a constant. fond. and its daniel growing outwith the sport and all that entailed but still championing max. fond. and it's the trials and tribulations and it's the familiarity and its the same jokes with the same laughs and the same smiles. its fond. they are so unbearably fond of each other !!!!!!!!!!!

[f1uckinghell]

MAX AND DANIEL BEING OLD AND HAPPY IN THEIR FARM IVE ME ALL THE FLUFF GIVE ME THEM SITTING ON THE PORCH WATCHING THEIR GRANDKIDS PLAY THAT SAME ROPE GAME GIVE ME DRINKING COFFEE GIVE ME CUDDLING ON A SWING GIVE ME FLUFF TAG PROMPTS

I am so sorry for what I did 😭😂

send me prompts for cute little prompt fills

——

„Dad I swear to god if you don’t sit down here right now-“

Isabel sounds exasperated, and Max can’t blame her. Daniel can’t sit still, can’t leave her to work for once, always standing around, offering to drive the tractor, giving advice he has already given her hundreds of times.

„Alright, alright,“ Daniel groans, sitting down in the wicker chair that creaks only slightly worse than his joints. Max can’t help but laugh.

„Let her work, Dan.“

„Have some tea, Dad,“ Isabel tells him in a gentler tone now, wiping her hands on her work flannel. They have fine lines and a few pigment spots now, but Max still remembers when they were so little that they could hold on to only one of his fingers. „I’ve got it, yeah?“

Daniel nods, looking a little bit lost. Max reaches out and squeezes his hand. „She’s got it.“

„I know, I know,“ Daniel sighs, and then finally leans back in his chair. It’s hard for him to let go, but he has to eventually. It’s hard work, and even with their automatic machinery and all of their helpful tools, it’s too much for him now.

„You should call Clara,“ Isabel suggests, handing Max his phone that’s been lying on the porch table, „I bet she’ll be happy to be distracted from writing her thesis.“

„That’s a great idea, sweetheart,“ Max says, smiling up at her from where he sits. She smiles back. „…I’ll fix you a snack in a minute,“ he adds, and she sighs with a little laugh.

„You’re almost as bad as Dad!“

„Just some fruit-“

„Yeah, okay, Mom.“

„Hey, that’s unfair!“ Daniel protests, but Isabel throws up her hands.

„I’m picking my battles!“ she laughs, and quickly flees the scene to get back to work.

„Mothers are harder to say no to,“ Max tells Daniel, rubbing his shoulder. „Call Clara, I’ll join you in a second.“

„Okay,“ Daniel sighs dramatically. Before Max can go, Daniel pulls in his hand and kisses the inside of his wrist like he’s done countless times in their long life together.

[thesinglesjukebox]

KACEY MUSGRAVES - "DEEPER WELL"

Kacey's music continues to evolve! Is it deeper? Well...

[5.94]

Hannah Jocelyn: Kacey Musgraves makes the second-best Kacey Musgraves song we're covering today. [5]

Aaron Bergstrom: "Deeper Well" sounds like someone else trying to write a Kacey Musgraves song without fully understanding why that's something people would want. Over the course of Musgraves' first three albums, culminating in the near-perfect Golden Hour, we got to know this incredibly likeable, relatable songwriter. Her little nods to things like cannabis and astrology were fun quirks, but never core to her appeal. Now it seems like she views herself as some kind of novelty act, Spacey Kacey as caricature, and so to get back on track after the relative flop of star-crossed she's maxed out those specific character attributes. As a result we get a flat triangulation of a song with clunky references to gravity bongs and Saturn returns that seem disconnected to the point of being meaningless. [4]

Dave Moore: Lesser Kacey Musgraves even before the gravity bong shows up. The songwriting's gone mushy and circular, which is a shame because minor Musgraves is often charming (my low-key favorite song from her first album is still "I Miss You"). She seems to think that her tell-don't-show version of finding purpose, which somehow has more crackpot woo-woo in it than friggin' Kesha, is going to make up for the fact that, songwise, she's not going anywhere.  [5]

Isabel Cole: Astrology is fake but I too have felt the power of the Saturn return — not an overnight transformation but the dawning sense that perhaps after all I could choose something other than what had felt foreordained by my own gravity, a force that once had seemed to me more immovable than the stars. I love how gently Musgraves bids farewell to the past here: “no regrets, baby, I just think that maybe it’s natural when things lose their shine.” Many things are worth doing for a while; few things are worth doing forever. It’s a perspective on growing up not as an abandonment of the youthful self but simply as a movement into new territory. And the song is so pretty, in an easy way that sounds lovelier to my ears every time I listen — pretty like morning light in summer, unhurried, serene. [7]

Nortey Dowuona: Oh, so this song was co-written by Daniel Tashian, son of the legendary Barry and Holly Tashian, songwriters of "I'll Take My Time Going Home"? You mean this had no other choice than to be good? That's not fair!? I wanted a choice in thinking this was OK! [9]

Taylor Alatorre: "Deeper Well" illustrates its core concept a bit too faithfully for its own good. It revolves around a musical holding pattern which is meant to serve as a sonic rendering of our dangerously seductive habits and circular tendencies, then lingers about too long in this pretty but hidebound pattern of its own making. Good for a master's thesis in music composition, not so much for a lead single teased at the Super Bowl. Its saving grace is how it departs from the divisive sound of star-crossed without reading as a mewling apology for it, instead sounding like the genuine product of a woman who's had her dial turned to Sirius XM's The Bridge for the past six months (been there). [5]

Will Rivitz: In much the same way earth-shattering acid trip revelations translate unremarkably to plain English, "Deeper Well" relays its life lessons in the pedestrian scrawl of a hazy afterglow Notes app attempt. With few descriptive details sans a single reference to a gravity bong, Musgraves' (admittedly correct) insights that "some people are not worth my energy, smoking weed all day can be a waste of time, and it's OK that I grew up in a small town" come across flat. That she's backed by a track as insubstantial as her pen does her no favors. [4]

Leah Isobel: "You got dark energy / Something I can't unsee" is such a terrible line it honestly makes me wonder if Golden Hour was even any good. That twinkling, felt-coated piano at the high end does ease my doubts -- but only a little. [3]

Michael Hong: This is Kacey Musgraves diving into the lifestyle influencer grift (self-help manual to follow), her voice doubled to take on a detached yet authoritative sheen. It lacks nuance, yet you search for it anyway -- for me, it's the way she sings "I found a deeper well," the melody left hanging, the thought left incomplete. Against all reason, I'm sitting here at the bottom of it, waiting and still wondering what comes next. [6]

Katherine St. Asaph: Hot take: "You've got dark energy" is fine (scansion aside). It's "my Saturn has returned" that's the deeper embarrassment, and I'm not sure how one dislikes the first bit of woo while being fine with the other. Anyway, this is basically "Merry Go Round" grown shaggy and unkempt and sprouting little weeds of "The Sound of Silence," plus the me-first self-care message beloved of inspirational pop culture. Think "Yes, And?" with the subtext of cheating swapped out for a subtext of depression. Kacey just seems so unenthused, so resigned; the future she sings about doesn't seem to offer joy, just the lack of sunk costs. The subtext is so unconcealed and consistent that it feels like it must be deliberate -- but it can't be deliberate, because no one ever portrays this kind of mindset as bad. Or maybe it can't be deliberate because, judging by the arrangement, the deeper well she's found might just be reverb. [6]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: The central tension in “Deeper Well” is that the growth and wellness that Kacey is singing about sounds like it came from a deeply unwell place. She says goodbye to relationships that no longer fulfill her, drugs that no longer bring her the highs they used to, and dark energy that can’t be unseen—but through it all, she sounds the most contemplative and at peace she has been in years. Adulthood is about coming to terms with the fact that the choices that you made were the best decisions you had at the time, and about learning to forgive yourself for not having all of the answers—about love, friendship, self-care—magically from the start. How can a process that feels so ego-shattering and devastating ultimately be so good for us—and how can we forgive ourselves for fighting it? As a 27-year-old, I’m not exactly hearing “When I turned 27, everything started to change” objectively, nor do I want to. Sometimes a song arrives at the right moment in your life to hit perfectly.  [10]

Mark Sinker: Not sure if I’ve ever gone on about this here, but a thing I’d love to read or to be directed toward is a deep comparative study of melody within different genres, the shapes and turns and cadences that evoke this milieu, versus the others usual to that one. The key phrase here seems to me highly untypical of the kinds of tuneline you’d expect to find in country, and not just because it’s drenched in big indie echo (plus whispered). What exactly is building up these expectations? I need someone with a YouTube channel and audio examples alongside the staves and dots and sharps and flats – even just an overhead projector and a long pointy stick. They can prove I’m very wrong if they like! (Maybe I am!)  [9]

Ian Mathers: Not really a great sign when the most interest I can muster is in the way the bassline periodically threatens to pivot to full-on "Walk on the Wild Side." The "deeper well" stuff just isn't signifying for me, nor the "dark energy" bit. Sure, it sounds like personal growth, and I bet from the inside it means a lot, but it registers as... kinda nothing? There are a couple of floaty bits that are nice, and certainly nothing dips below "pleasantly competent," but if I could just about squint and see what people were raving about with "High Horse," my vision isn't quite as clear here. [5]

Alfred Soto: Kacey Musgraves makes agreeable music that holds my attention while it's on. "Deeper Well" has the misfortune to sound like middling Taylor Swift -- something from the back half of Speak Now, say. This well is shallow. [4]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: In a few years I will hear this while perusing vegetables at a nice grocery store and hum along pleasantly without being aware of what I'm doing. For now, in my conscious experience, I am utterly unmoved by her studied, philosophical blankness – people didn't like the last album very much, but at least it had hooks! [4]

Joshua Lu: In the over ten years since I first listened to Kacey sing about weed, it's been legalized in my state, I grew old enough to legally purchase it, I reached a point in my life where I wanted to dabble in it (2020 was a time), and I got hooked enough to build up a substantial tolerance. Through all this time, I had her music: rolling joints in "Follow Your Arrow," letting the grass just grow in "High Time," having a "Slow Burn." If she could've snuck in a reference to a bong in her Christmas album, I bet she would've. To hear Kacey sing about dropping weed thus felt more cataclysmic than anything else she could've done. Yes, I was excited by her return to a more standard country sound, even better with that metallic tinge that embellished some of her greatest recent work, but Kacey Musgraves singing about leaving weed behind? Listening to "Deeper Well," though, it can't help but feel natural: it was just a thing that she liked once but would rather leave behind, and some things in life are just like that. There's no judgement or embarrassment, just an acknowledgement of a change in her life, and I appreciate how the song isn't explicitly about getting wiser or more responsible or any of those things that people assume come with aging. It's instead framed as a continued discovery of who she is and what's out there in the world, and the route she took to become the person she is today. Funnily enough, I stopped taking weed this year too. I'm glad I now have a Kacey song for that process as well. [9]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[123pixieaod]

hi don’t know if you are still active but are gonna finish the amnesia fic?

Hellooo, I'm so sorry for some reason I stopped getting Tumblr notification for asks?? So I'm only seeing this now😭 Yes I will definitely get back to it! It's probably the most fic which matters most to me, and so if I do nothing else I will see it through haha. I'm sorry for the long delay in updates, I'm currently battling my masters dissertation, and really can't face editing heavy!sad!amnesia chapters alongside editing heavy!sad!history paper, but I fully intend to throw myself back into uploads once I finally am finished the thesis.

Also, I wanted to include the beginning of the next chapter, but honestly it hasn't been written yet, so this is the beginning of a few chapters down the line.

-

There is a party. Ironically, all the time Daniel was just a mid-driver with Mclaren, he craved these after-racing parties, yearned for the opening to just drink himself into his own little oblivion.

And now he’s the winner. He’s the one who should be shouting loudest, celebrating largest. He should be happy.

He just wants to go home.

He sits with George and a few interns they got on well with. George is telling some story about a snowbording accident he got into when he went to the Alps with his girlfriend. Everyone laughs at something. Daniel smiles, a fraction too late.

He’s not here. He’s not listening. He’s just watching Max. Max at another booth, smiling. Rolling his glass methodically, the rim balanced on the sticky table’s surface. Charles and Carlos are seated beside him. Carlos is saying something, his hands animated with Hispanic flair. The other two are listening. Charles is sat between them. His side is against Max’s.

-

It took him a criminally long time to see how Max acted around Charles. But once he did, he couldn’t stop noticing it. The way Max listened to Charles, so intent and focused, the way Max smiled when he saw the other man, the way Max wrapped an arm around Charles’ waist, standing side by side as they both smiled from the podium.

It would make sense. A lot more than him and Max. Charles was younger, for a start. Pretty much Max’s age exactly - no weird, mildly dubious age gap to have to navigate. But beyond that, he was successful. He was young and upcoming, a star not only in the making but already burning iridescently bright. Already it was clear that he and Max were destined to be each other’s biggest rivals, the next Lewis and Sebastian, Hunt and Lauda.

Charles is, also objectively, one of the most handsome men alive. Daniel is not exactly self-deprecating, but even he can appreciate how good Charles looks, how effortlessly he outshines anyone in his periphery. And he can tell Max appreciates it too.

[sysakiddo]

first I'd like to say that I adoreeee the diplomacy au to bitsss (gives me hope for my future<33) I am wodering if you're using like your own experiences for inspo/ basing it off the way it kinda works for whatever country you're from or its mostly imaginary? as a fellow IR survivor and current victim of embassy internships, it's soooo different from what I have seen (ofc this is a work of fiction but like where I've interned it was so rare to speak with the Ambassador 1on1 bcz you're just some random kid, to let alone go on vacation with him) so I'm like curious if it's maybe different where you're from or you're just playing it up for the sake of entertainment? sorry for the long ask lmao <333

heyyy!! thank you SO MUCH for this ask and I feel absolutely giddy about the fact that a fellow IR survivor reads my shit 🧡 (and also scared I'm going to write something incredibly lame) So, I originally started writing from my Parisian experience. But of course, you are totally right about the reality of being an intern - I've rarely ever seen our ambassador and our communication mostly consisted of the cringiest mails one can imagine (from HIS side). However, as I said here, my supervisor was the loveliest woman who really pushed me to do my best and gave me a lot of lessons about being a woman in the diplomatic world. We often had lunch/dinner together + with her husband (who was our economic diplomat and the funniest lad) and kept in touch after I left and she helped me a lot with my thesis. So it wasn't the ambassador directly but a diplomat nonetheless who took me under their wing and guided me through what definitely was the worst year of my life so far. BUT I heard some crazy stories from smaller (like 5 staff members small) embassies where the ambassadors are all buddy buddy with the interns and frequently take them out etc. just because they are so bored in their designated countries lmao. (my country is small and has some small-ass embassies, mainly in Africa) So yes, Anne/Max thingy is all made up and only here for the plot lmao. In this story, it's Daniel's situation (he has no idea if there are any interns at his embassy at the moment) which is the og real one. How is your internship going??? I need the gossip bestie 👀

thank you so much for this ask and I hope I answered coherently enough!! if you have any more questions feel free to ask 🧡🧡

[airconditionedgirl]

Tagged by @nsfwitchy

Nickname: Ali!

Sign: Aries 

Height: 5′8″ sob

Song Stuck In Your Head: Emperor’s New Clothes by Panic at the Disco

Sleep: this is easy lol bc i had a major panic attack this morning from like 4 to 9am ish or like a series of them idk and that tired me out so much that i slept from like 10am to 5pm.

Dream Job: Dog Sittiing!

Wearing: pink panties be normal about it (unless you’re allowed not to be u know who yall are)

Favorite Songs: fcnk, idk im not a huge music person i just like what i like? Addict, Cult of Dionysus, Achilles Come Down, Kesha’s Take it Off, Brothers of Metal is a band that I also enjoy.

Favorite Instrument: The Violin

Favorite Authors: Brandon Sanderson, Neil Gaiman, April Daniels, E.E. Ottoman, Madeline Miller

Favorite Animal Sounds: dog

Last Song: Cruel Angel’s Thesis probably

Last Series: Agatha Christie’s Poirot. It’s not Sherlock Holmes being extremely homoromantic with Watson but it’s a good show

Random: I learned how to solve a Rubik’s Cube last week! It’s been awesome and i literally cant stop telling people about it! Aside from that not much else has been going on. So I guess I’ll just put some movie opinions here: the Wachowski Sister’s Speed Racer movie is fantastic, the Star Wars prequels are good actually, the Matrix Reloaded and Revolutions are amazing actually, Mad Max Fury Road is a better Fallout movie than we will ever get, and I didn’t care for John Wick 3 that much. Like, it’s Fine? I just think it was doing too much, was too consistently visually overstimulating and less cohesive overall. Also the original “Chocolate Factory” film is low key facinating as shit and yall??? my favorite headcanon ever is that Willy Wonka is the Devil. Like actually and literally Satan. Seriously try watching that movie with that lens next time because it totally fits. He’s this dude who is the complete master of his own corner of the universe, he’s clearly very intelligent and is basically blatantly magical but scratch the surface and he’s also deeply unhinged, he guides the kids through the layers of his factory and literally Tempts them with things that represent their sins or character flaws, he’s all about testing them to see if they’ll resist that temptation or do the right thing in the end, a bunch of other little things that goddamn office of his and that contract and the oompa loompas might as well being demons (which is uh not good racially speaking but it’s better than the surface level text of the movie which basically has them as his slaves so Yikes) like seriously the movie legit gets so much better and interesting if you go into it with “Willy Wonka is the Devil” in your mind go go watch it right now damn you <3

And now I’ll tag @msaprildaniels @thetransgirlwhoneverwas @ginger-snap-talkin-nonsense !

[gokartkid]

f1 fic rec list

self indulgent! my personal masterlist of hits, also theres 25 of them... 25 days of fic christmas, an advent calendar perhaps!

turn back and return by @rudesses

“No! We are climbing together,” Charles says, because Charles is very generous. He likes to phrase it that way—together. They haven’t climbed together in years.

charles/alex mountaineering au, SUCH good characterisation, the universe is so full and it has this like. longing-not-going-for-it that makes me crazy. THEE chalex fic to me. it holds tension so well and really makes you feel nervous in the high adrenaline moments, and you can tell the care that charles and alex have for each other, and their well established relationship immediately as the fic starts, which i think is so well communicated in so little time!

phantoms and pencil marks by cazio

Pierre woke to a boy sitting next to his bed. Amnesia AU

pierre/charles, amnesia au where pierres been in a accident and has severe amnesia, its written so well from his perspective you can feel his confusion the whole time and its amazing piarles but also a standout character study of pierre it has so many painful moments, i love how pierre he... is meeting charles again and again, but warped and you can see how painful it is for everyone. so so so good. it takes everything i love about amnesia fics and elevates it

Second Star to the Right by @gufettogrigio

It is stupid of Nico to even give Lewis the chance to notice. The hot water kettle is just a bit too heavy at breakfast one morning and Nico loses his grip. Lewis is next to him at the buffet table of the hotel and catches it out of reflex; Nico knows better than to think it’s kindness. He stares at where Nico’s fingers are still refusing to cooperate. "What happened to your hand?" "Nerves" - Nico answers with a shrug, glad for the double meaning in the English phrasing. It's up to Lewis how he wants to interpret it; Nico didn't lie.

nico rosberg/lewis hamilton but also jenson button/nico rosberg but separately, there are alternate endings.

SOO so so iconic, i have reread this multiple times. mind the tags, but it's an incredible nico character study, everyone in this is amazing but especially toto, this line: [Toto laughs, kindly. “You are my World Champion and I’ve only got two of those. I am invested in your continued survival. Always.”] it is everything to me. nicos mentality about himself, his feelings about racing, about the championship, about lewis. wow!

provenance by ecorone

At the end of the world, art curator Lewis Hamilton finds his way back to the artist called no5.

lewis/sebastian, genuinely like. an incredible work of art fic. it's an apocalypse - non driver - surreal fic. its setting is if the end of the world dinosaur times were happening now, and what to do with all your regrets, and follows lewis as the main character. it has so much depth to it, the writing style itself is incredible. the characterisations, the philosophies, the EVERYTHING. i left an insane comment on it just so i could spill my thoughts out better and i can't do it a second time hahaha but i would so so so highly recommend reading, to be honest even if sewis is not your thing just because. imo it is so much more than just a fic about drivers. also read their other stuff bc i do not like lewis/max as a pairing but i will vouch for ecorones interpretation as being. THEE lewis/max thesis.

echo of the future by @tetrapod7

Lewis, once on the path of the Jedi and now in the midst of the Galactic Empire, learns of the chance to save ancient Jedi texts. Max, a stormtrooper, becomes smuggler Daniel Ricciardo's copilot. They too pursue the Jedi texts -- with the hope of selling them to the Empire.  Their stories collide at the Jedi Temple on Genbara. As the danger of an Imperial Star Fleet looms large, Max, Daniel, Lewis, Seb, and Jamie have to figure out what matters most to them, what they owe to each other, and devise a plan for an unavoidable space battle with the Empire -- a battle for their future and hopes.

lewis/sebastian max&daniel i will like. forever and always be a star wars guy x i read this in one sitting it made me feel insane everything about it is perfect, all of the storylines running at once then colliding. lewis in this especially is EXCEPTIONAL, r0s-c0 made me laugh so hard when i read it. droids 4eva! the particular sw verse this is is built up perfectly there are SO many details here and so much world building it makes me want to eat it. the entire atmosphere is quintissentially star wars, a mission running on hope and a few credits. amazing &lt;3

in that iron ground by @lilyrizzy

"Maxy,” Daniel says and it sounds like he’s choking. Max frowns, deeper. He crouches in front of Daniel, resting his hands on his bare thighs. Daniel is still only wearing the boxers and undershirt he went to sleep in. Nothing’s changed. “Daniel, what is wrong?” Max repeats.  Daniel swallows. I don’t want things to change, he thinks again. “My dad’s dead," he says. Or Daniel takes Max home to Perth for a funeral.

max/daniel incredible scholarship on daniel and max, who they are to each other especially in daniels lowest moment, i love how it... it is the lowest point of daniel that we are seeing which brings out so much depth to his character, and who he is especially behind his like, media/character mask. the characterisation of daniels family, how he struggles to process the grief, the complexities around grief and the consistent running undertone of why-mine-and-not-yours surrounding max and daniels fathers. his internalised homophobia/fear of coming out. amazing

sixteen cadences for children in bloom by distressedgremlin

Pierre flips his cap around and marks it on his calendar: 2021, the year of living selfishly

pierre/charles SUCH A GOOD PIERRE. such a good pierre. he deserves to be selfish and to live selfishly. i think seeing him become so confident is so great in this fic and especially the narrative foils between him, daniil and yuki i love, how he evolves in those relationships, becoming a team leader, becoming someone who HE likes. also obsessed with distressedgremlin's sewis fics. so so so obsessed. the le mans fic is everything to me

constellation falling into place by wraysford

For some reason, the last part is what sticks in Nico’s head, you were quick, in that awed, painfully genuine tone of Lewis’, but, he hastily reminds himself, how fast or slow he was back then doesn’t matter anymore or, wherein Nico goes to university and Lewis races

nico/lewis HEARTBREAKING au to me. nico quits racing and lewis doesn't and they meet again. im obsessed with it as a nico character study and a look inside his strange little brain in this universe... its perfect. the underlying jealous and what-could-have-been in every scene, the way lewis is so. GENUINE about wanting to reconnect with him, it kills me.

tomorrow on every shore by @missyourflight

This season on Below Deck Sailing Yacht... Six weeks. Nine charters. Lots of hot tub stuff. *  “Is it not your colour?” Max says. The production team gave the whole crew new uniforms for this season, swapped their usual navy polos for something that apparently pops more on camera. It’s sort of peachy, not Max’s favourite, but it looks good on Daniel. “Please,” Daniel scoffs. “Everything’s my colour.” He bumps his hip into Max. “You weren’t tempted to go with the skort option?” Max bumps back, pretending to consider. “I thought about it, but it’s just not practical on deck, you know?” “Guests are arriving,” Christian says, his smile tight, eyes fixed ahead. “Could we attempt to act like professionals, please?” And then the guests are on the dock, and everyone puts on smiles to greet them, and it’s almost like a normal charter except for all the fucking cameras everywhere.

max/daniel, below deck au, i read this right after binging below deck med so obvs it was perfect. i love everyones characterisation especially christians. + yuki as the chef is perfect. i love the interview sections paired with whats happening in the fic bc its like... i love an unreliable perspective! fantastic au and they are so 3D fleshed out

striving for goodness while the cruel men win by @misonikomi

Lewis had been at a disadvantage. Cruelty had never been bred into her; she had to learn it one piece at a time. When she first started karting, she had tried to blend in with the other kids, an impossible feat. There had been so much violence even then, in the way the kids looked at her, spoke to her, and touched her. She had to learn that violence as well, in order to win

lewis/sebastian, gender swap au, i think one of the first and only i read because i get a bit nervous about them, but incredible, incredible thesis material. the characterisations of lewis and charles and amazing, how they change and are the same as women. perfect narrative foils for each other. sebastian and lewis' relationship in this is fantastic, how lewis' past with nico has affected her into her relationship with seb but also with f1 in general. suzie is standout in this to me, the woman-woman relationships in general are perfect

december makes me quiet by @warriorbarnes

“Hallo?” he greets, and gets to his feet.  “There is a snow storm,” are the words he’s met with. He’s taken aback at first, the accented english not what he’d expected, and has to recalibrate his brain from german to english.  His brows knit together when he realizes who it is on the other end of the line. “Charles?” he asks. or, right before Christmas, Seb gets an unexpected guest.

sebastian/charles, one of my favourite sebchal fics!!! i think it handles that line between awkwardness and getting to know each other so well. any sebchal fic that has charles being normal around sebastian is immediately inaccurate, we know his complexes! i love to read it... so comforting, being snowed in is THE premise!

lucky thirteen by @azzy421

Being the daughter of the most successful racing driver in the world (retired) comes with a lot of privilege and a few very notable downsides.  1. Dad is famous, and it makes people act weird around him and ask Ayla weird things, like what he eats for breakfast or what deodorant he uses. 2. Sometimes he gets talked into going to Germany for the summer to talk about engines and aerodynamics with Uncle Toto’s team for months on end. And this is only really annoying because - 3. He never, ever wants to talk about racing with Ayla. Ayla, head over heels in love with the world of Formula 1, is determined that she’s going to prove she has what it takes to start karting, even if it means going behind her dad’s back to do it. When she discovers that not only is there a girls-only karting group next to their temporary home in Germany but that it’s being run by four-time World Champion Sebastian Vettel (Ayla’s second-favourite driver of all time) (also retired), she is determined to seize the opportunity with both hands.  And, well. Her dad is lonely. Sebastian seems even lonelier. Solving that problem would be a nice bonus.

lewis/sebastian, i also usually never go for kid fics but this one intrigued me and it is SOOO good. seeing lewis through the lens of his kid, her passion for karting and especially his very, very real fear for her entering that world... so so so realistic and good. it has the exact right amount of self indulgence but also reality, i love seeing the 'future of f1' with mick, lando and george, and how lewis to ayla is still first and foremost her dad. sebastian in this is incredible but also this cannot be prophetic because if he did become an f1 hermit it would make me so sad xx

how to get it, how to live it by grandsprix

Alex wants to say no, because - well, because his ex was a closet case, and Charles is the kind of beautiful Alex is going to feel insecure about, and he has half a tub of strawberry cheesecake Haagen Daaz and a rental of Dune waiting for him at home after his shift, and is that worth giving up to give some French twink a blowjob in the staff bathroom? or, Alex works in a gay bar in Soho, and Charles is lost.

alex/charles, obviously love every grandprix chalex fic, but this is my favourite! i am so charmed and in love with charles' characterisation here, his clumsy confidence and how he is immediately offended by alex not wanting to have sex-sex with him haha also alex's like... slow sense of impending doom at becoming closer to him. perfect

come on, starboy by @yekoc

Daniel’s just slinging his bag over his shoulder to head out to the parking lot when there’s a noise behind him, the hollow metallic echo of a locker door slamming. Turning, he sees that kid. Max. The running back who always fumbles.  He’s standing in front of the locker he just slammed, muscles tense. His too-big mouth is drawn into a flat line. He has his phone in his hand: he looks at it, puts it in his pocket, and grinds his fist against the bank of lockers in front of him.  “Hey,” Daniel says, because he feels creepy now, just looking.  The kid looks up at him, startled.  “Oh,” he says. “Hi.”

max/daniel, obviously like anyone reading this list will have read this or if you haven't you should?? max and daniel are perfect in this actually perfect. it has that... stuck in a small town that you are outgrowing but will you ever be able to stretch. standout to me: the spectre of max's dad. we hardly see him properly but you can tell the impact he is having on max, and by extent on daniel. this is also possibly my favourite lewis, second only to new wave (new emotion). the way he steals the show for me in every scene he is in, his college aspirations, fears for the future, wanting to gone beyond the simplistic perceptions of him... amazing. number 2 yekoc favourite is glory from a high rise but i am only reccing one per author strictly to not make this list insane

the heartbeat is a hunger by @thelittlebirdthatkeptsomanywarm

2019 FORMULA ONE SPORTING REGULATIONS Art. 34: BONDING Teams are required to register all bonds between drivers with the FIA at the beginning of each season. New bonds must be formally recognized through a bonding ceremony under supervision of at least one FIA representative [...]. Art. 34.1 [added on 1.01.1993] Bonds between drivers competing for different teams are prohibited. I'm so unused to being - well, understood perhaps. - Vladimir Nabokov's first letter to his future wife, Véra

lewis/sebastian, lewis/nico, SUCH a good bonding au... a really interesting look into how dystopian something like this could get, and i think a realistic look into how sports is constantly pushing us to the limit so if there were more ways to do so.... they absolutely would take advantage? lewis and nico's relationship is so interesting here, and seb as the trope inversion is SOOO. it is so well executed.

new wave (new emotion) by nothoughtsjustvibes

In which Max realizes he’s in love with Daniel and flies to Colorado to make it Lewis’s problem. Lewis just wants him to leave – preferably on a plane to Australia.

max/daniel lewis&max, my favourite lewis. ever!!!!!! max in this is STELLAR as well, their relationship is so so funny and so well balanced, i mostly love how... lewis deals with AD21 mentally in this? and how he's like urgh max is here? i will be nice. to hey. max is pretty cool :) in a very organic sense and also lewis being a mentor figure when i have 2022 lh superimposed over 2008-2016 menace lh in my mind is very funny. lewis micromanaging max's problems to fix them is my favourite thing, also every small interaction with charles in here is brilliant.

crude generalisations and vulgar simplifications by @janinaduszejko

Alex remembers attending his first Cabinet meeting - he’d been awed by the imposant room, the history this place held, where wars had been declared, disasters averted and ensured, with its stately inner ring of ministers, surrounded by the bustling outer ring filled with their advisors and assistants. The gratitude he had felt in that moment, being a part of the centre of it all, the place where power housed. Almost six hours later, he’d stumbled out of the stuffy room with George at his side, eyes wide with commiseration as he’d led Alex through the narrow halls.  “These ministers.” Alex had said, a hollow look in his eyes. “Are they all-?” “Afraid so.” George’s voice had been kind, but knowing, like he’d expected this and had grimly prepared himself.  “Halfwits.” Alex had moaned, as George had patted him on the back in sympathy. “Fools and idiots, every last one of them.”

george/alex, so so osos oso os good. i LOVE a political au i love intrigue i love stupidity i love jargon <3 and this baby has it all!!! i love any kind of misunderstanding/torment in a fic and in this one... alex u are so good at torment <3 george also coming up with the weirdest solution to their workplace romance is SO him. christian horner in this made me laugh a lot. this was i think the start of my galex downfall

steal the air out of my lungs (make me feel it) by @baking-soda

Max has never been so tired in his life. He can’t believe he’s going into call like this, that he couldn’t get to sleep last night. What an idiot. “Hey,” Daniel says, sauntering into a work room balancing a green smoothie and two large coffees from the caf. He puts one in front of Max. “You ready to save lives, Maxy?”

max/daniel obviously like. titular maxiel material, but i read it again and often! i am not a med student by any means but ive done placements in hospitals + medsci papers and reading this was like. it is exactly the feeling! when ur in it and you are a cog in a very big machine made for helping people and it is the most exhausting thing you have ever done but the most fulfilling... max in this fic is so so so amazing. the dissonance between how he sees himself and everyone else around him sees him. scenes that stick with me: when hes going to text his dad about the intubation but then he deletes everything because he thinks it wasn't impressive even though he had just been riding high. and every scene where he comforts the rookies but he like.. doesn't even realise himself he's doing it. to him he is being normal. love &lt;3

Invent us as we were (real tears, hard love) by diamondcrystalink

“Seb, aren't you freaked out?” Every human who doesn’t work with mimic engineering hates seeing mimics down to their components, it's said to ruin the illusion. Sebastian didn't even hesitate to help him. “Why would I be? It's just you,” Sebastian replied without much thought, his concentration on shaping the lattice to the gash. - Charles is an android who should have had his memory wiped at the start of the season per regulation, Ferrari decided otherwise. Sebastian doesn't know.

sebastian/charles, android-au-i-love-you! illegal ferrari goings on i love you!!! i am forever and always a sci fi lover and this hits all the spots for me, the idea of charles as the golden boy of ferrari because he was literally made crafted and perfected by them, the ethics/philosophies of being an android (charles hating remembering that he is), the way it starts and ends with a dream as well, bookended perfectly. so so good

the alps by @grandprix-ao3

Yuki catches his first glance of Pierre somewhere without him in pre-season testing. He’s blue and pink, he’s glowing, a flat-brimmed cap with Alpine’s A emblazoned on it sitting backwards on his head. Pierre and his sunglasses, the microphones in his face, the questions, the novelty, the half-arrogant grins. “He looks different in pink,” Liam remarks, halfway to a joke. Yuki hates it. It reminds him of all the distance between them, all the words he’s too scared—too late to say. There’s a gap between them, now. It's mountainous. It’s brutal.

yuki/pierre, this is one of my favourite all time yukierre fics so i couldn't not include it. every single thing about it is perfect, yuki struggling with his feelings, the way he and pierre are drawn to each other again and again. the struggle with what people seem to see so easily and making that real. ALL TIME!

cleaner better breed by @toastandvegemite

The lights inside the glass box turned on and Daniel saw the android for the first time. Something hooked in his chest. “Did they have to make it look so real?” he murmured to Michael, turning his head slightly. (RedBull builds a robot driver. They call it Max.)

max/daniel this had me on the edge of my seat the whole time, the idea already of technology displacing high risk/reward activities like sport is so fascinating combined with the fact that sports is such a political tool in terms of soft power, almost unmatched, so how to wield that soft power effectively with a robot? make him a bit human and likeable. all of daniels internal monologues feel so true to form throughout this fic, and the ending. AGH! catch! love this au

Everything I do, I'm gonna think of you by @misonikomi

Charles's eyes scan up and down his body, expression somewhat unimpressed. Seb takes inventory of himself. Nondescript jeans, gray Puma sneakers, plain gray t-shirt. Not much to look at, he admits. Or: Charles is Bella Hadid, if Bella Hadid used to kart and was also a bit disillusioned with modeling, and Seb is still Seb.

sebastian/charles, SUCH A GOOD AU!!! i love fashion and i love f1... this is like a perfect in between. a really really good charles character study again i love taking the drivers out of their... natural habitats! and this as well, it doesn't shy away from how charles in this universe has lead to quitting karting, homophobia, gender etc. and sebastian is so unabashedly seb and them learning how to be together and charles gradually showing more of himself... the modelling world in this as well is so rich. its so good!!!

home (is wherever I'm with you) by actparci

On the drive back to the hotel Max had turned to him, blue eyes fierce and piercing.  “Promise me you won’t stop being angry. You’re angry because you know what you can do. Use it, control it, let it fuel you. Other people won’t understand but that doesn’t matter, you know what you’re capable of.” You and me, he’d seemed to say, we’re the same. Charles wonders now how he ever thought Max wouldn’t understand. Or: Charles leaves Ferrari, tries to win a championship, and learns some things about belonging. All the while, Max is there

max/charles, i do not read much lestappen at all but this was amazing. charles moving to red bull and its done so well, because. i am a forza-ferrari-forza-charles guy forever but i am also addicted to alternate universes! all of the moments where there are differences between the teams, having the cheesy but so emotionally cathartic races and interactions and wins... its too good!

For the thrill of it all by @boxboxlewis

Charles unfolds from his headstand with cervine grace and stands up. “Geooooorge,” he says slowly. “George, George… George.” His eyebrows fly up, and he narrows his eyes at Alex. “Your friend who needs a place to stay for a few days, he is George? The George from your classes? That one? Posh George?”

george/alex, this is a series so technically cheating... essential george characterisations here! they are both so british (deeply derogatory) all of the dialogue is so perfect!!! i love their dynamic as flatmates, charles i love you but if i were flatting with him id kill him xx [If this were real, if they were dating, he wouldn’t fuck George, not tonight; he would draw it out, the anticipation, he would allow them the luxury of a long slow discovery. As it is he pulls back] my favourite line because alex is in every universe deluded. that boy loves you!

transmotion by heroics

Vettel's eyes fly to Lewis's, and he looks as shocked as Lewis feels. Then he grins. "You again." "Me again," Lewis says. He's lived in Frankfurt nearly four years now, and the German feels clumsy on his tongue in a way it hasn't since those first few months.

sebastian/lewis, literally what can i say. football, fashion designer au. the sebastian in this fic is so well fleshed out, and i love how its the.. uncertainty of being between stages in life, and how they struggle as adults with their relationship. lewis having moments of unintentional cruelty that they have to pull apart, and sebastian the same, the perils of homophobia in sport. charles and pierre in this i love, when pierre and lewis talk about his fashion show. pierre is a lh fanboy in every universe!

okay. that's it! they are literally in no order and also so muddled i am so sorry. if you are on this list i am such a big fan of you and just want to show my appreciation xx

[brakingpoint]

Idk if you have seen this question go around twitter and tiktok, but i have seen a lot of people discuss "if the 20 drivers on the grid were in the hunger games, how would they perform?"

I would like to hear your take! :)

thank you SO much for sending me this... i would not call myself a hunger games connoisseur because i put all my energy into hyperfixating on the prequel instead but i AM a hunger games enthusiast and i spent far too long thinking about this in the shower. also i'm doing the 2022 grid bc i don't have the vibes of the 2023 newbies totally locked down yet

(also i'm doing this as everyone roughly competing in individual games as opposed to against each other. bc i think that is more fun)

max: adjusting for inflation (how old he was when he started f1 vs the age you have to be to do the hunger games) he is like, a career tribute in training from district 2 who jumps up and volunteers when he is about twelve and then effortlessly wins the whole thing. gives an insanely nonchalant victory interview, does the victory tour like he's being held at gunpoint, and then is never seen again

charles: finnick odair if he kept almost getting murdered by other people's poor decisions. receives the most strategically pointless gifts from sponsors. literally put him in a desert arena and he will inexplicably be sent raincoats by the dozen

checo: ceo of coasting his way to the final like, three or four tributes based on a combination of luck, occasionally clever moves, and mostly just getting forgotten by everyone. his downfall comes when he overestimates the loyalties of the tributes he's in an alliance with and they stab him in the back (literally) with no remorse

carlos: objectively promising, great scores when he does his little demonstration, capitol haircare brands are tripping over each other to do a deal with him when he wins (because surely he will) but in practice he's another one who mostly just shithouses his way to the final three/four by being in the right place at the right time

lewis: scarily good. wins 75% on strategy, stealth, and speed and 25% by occasionally lashing out and murdering someone off the face of the planet but somehow avoids blame for it. also you know he somehow manages to wear the fuck out of whatever heinous fit he gets put in to ride in those chariots

lando: almost inadvertently starts a revolution because from the second he shows up in the reaping he gets such a devoted nationwide teenage girl fanbase that there are legitimate riots when he dies through an objectively silly unforced error in the final days of the games. also almost inadvertently gets assassinated before the games even start because he says something landogate worthy about the president in his interview. he was just having a laff

esteban: is genuinely just sort of having a nice time camping out in the trees and avoiding all the drama. it is just very unfortunate that in some idk quarter quell gender ratio fuckery he managed to get reaped alongside his childhood bestie pierre who has devoted his entire time in the arena to murdering esteban and esteban specifially

fernando: absolutely fucking terrifying. they have to stop showing his murders on tv because he's a little too gory even for the central thesis of the hunger games as an institution. he's just chill about it though. cracking his little yokes

valtteri: builds up so much pure boiling rage from being constantly ignored compared to the other tribute from his district that after a week or so of surviving because everyone kept ignoring him he finally snaps, swings through the forest on a vine tarzan-style screaming TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN, FUCK YOU, takes out four career tributes in the space of fifteen seconds, and then slams right into another tree killing himself instantly

daniel: crowd favourite going into the arena. makes a little joke at the reaping, serves in all his silly little outfits, gets great scores, secures the most sponsors, has the most charming interview in the history of the hunger games. and then when he's on the little platform waiting for the games to start he gets a bit too excited, starts doing a little dance, and gets blown up immediately

seb: another unlikely child prodigy victor with a polarising but highly effective tactic of utter ruthlessness paired with being very charming and also crying a lot. he is at his most powerful and dangerous, however, when he moves into the mentoring side of things because not only is he just an objectively good mentor but he does it while plotting to take down the capitol from the inside at the same time. the hunger games trilogy vs the hunger games trilogy if katniss had sebastian vettel for a mentor

kevin: impressive scores from the gamemakers (voted most likely to have a bit of a katniss moment during the evaluation; fok smashes door on his way out?) but doesn't really do a whole lot during the actual games. makes it pretty far and has a couple of genuinely impressive kills but is let down by a lack of sponsors and getting a little too invested in his vicious rivalry with nico hulkenberg

pierre: bit of a rollercoaster ride. impressive pre-games energy, good scores, looks hot in the interview, but tries to hang with the career tributes very early on and nearly flops his way to an early grave. not to be discouraged, he strikes out on his own and makes it impressively far as a free agent, but keeps putting himself back in danger by focusing too much on a) regaining the respect of the careers who really couldn't care less and mostly just want to kill this guy every time he shows up and b) taking any opportunity to slaughter esteban. killed around the time of the cornucopia feast (yuki's fault)

lance: exceptionally dangerous but not intentionally so. at first the general commentary take is that he's very good at making his kills look like an accident, until they finally get the right camera angles and it transpires that all of his kills are in fact total accidents that come about through his own recklessness and stupidity. unlikely fan favourite due to his perpetual exasperation with his mentor (brad)

mick: the son of a fearsome victor from days gone by but largely underestimated due to his nice guy reputation. attempts to leverage this by taking a kind of johanna mason angle and appearing utterly unthreatening until the last minute when he plans to brutally and efficiently kill every other remaining tribute, but his tactic backfires dramatically due to the incompetence of his mentor and sponsors and he starves to death in the middle stages of the games

yuki: gets unexpectedly far due to his small stature making it easy to hide and by forming an alliance with pierre that charms the crowds and prompts widespread speculation about whether there is a romance brewing in the arena. unfortunately he gets them both killed with his reckless enthusiasm about the feast at the cornucopia

zhou: yet another one who gets really far mostly by being ignored. once he gets into the arena, that is. the entire buildup to the games is defined by his rapid ascent to capitol fashion icon. he wins the whole thing through a combination of laying low and getting sweet sweet sponsor gifts and then is permitted to stay in the capitol where he enjoys a prosperous career as stylist for future tributes

alex: he either dies in the very first brawl at the cornucopia OR sneaks his way to the final handful of tributes and wins the whole thing, no inbetween. if he does make it to the end he has at least one dramatic near death experience due to overestimating the kindness of the careers he forms a brief and tentative alliance with but he gets excellent medical care from his sponsors who are mostly supporting him because they saw a really cute video of his cats back in his home district

nicky: again he either dies immediately OR he coasts to the end by being a bit mid and forgettable foxface style and when there's around four tributes left he attempts a raid on their encampment to get food and somehow, in a series of events that no number of replays have ever successfully put into a logical sequence, blows up half the arena and everyone in it, leaving the games without a victor and setting into motion a series of events that lead to the downfall of the capitol, the destruction of half of panem, and a dramatic coup. after all this max verstappen finally looks out of the door of his house in the victor's village in what remains of district two, where he has been playing sim racing games for the past ten years, sort of shrugs his shoulders, and goes back to hanging out with his cats

bonus nico rosberg: district one career tribute, runner up, mostly remembered for the intense psychological warfare between himself and lewis after they formed an alliance in the first hour of the game that got so deeply homoerotic that the gamemakers were like full time on the phone to president snow like hey man. we might have to allow two victors this year or people are gonna be really mad. but luckily nico and lewis solved that problem themselves by turning on each other when they were the only two people left and engaging in a like three-week long increasingly toxic cat and mouse chase that had the entire nation glued to their televisions 25/8