#but they work with anything that has crumbs
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forwards-beckon-rebound · 2 days ago
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batfam and the fanfic tropes i’m giving them
ft. bruce, dick, and jason
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bruce
child’s teacher x single parent i mean that’s literally him. but also i like the idea of exploring his partner’s relationship with his kids
i want somebody to write like a bruce x whoever fic (whoever it is isn’t that important but i’m just saying i do think superbat is fun) with that trope
some college au where like all the kids have taken one of prof kent’s class and they all think he should be their dad
because they don’t want to leave their new dad
they’re hyping bruce up without him even knowing during their office hours
“like yknow prof kent, my dad has a dinosaur”
“oh…that’s certainly…interesting? i’m not sure what this has to do with intro to investigative journalism though”
“you could investigate the dinosaur! actually, we always have a big thanksgiving dinner and our butler, alfred, makes the best stuffing. why don’t you come over and check it out?”
“i’m not sure that’s appropriate of me as your professor. also i’m not sure a dinosaur would be a suitable—”
“you could get an exclusive interview with gotham’s richest and most eligible bachelor? um and we’ll throw in some wayne enterprises secrets too”
“…what was the address again?”
also i think he just gives me enemies to lovers vibes
maybe it has something to do with his canonical relationships
dick
meet cute i think he’s the only one who’s smooth enough to make this not awkward
like it is sort of awkward because this man flirts using puns but i feel like he’s charming enough to make it work
“hey girl are you a booger because i would pick you first” and then rolls nat20
fake dating
i feel like he would agree to it whether or not he actually liked the other person. honestly he might come up with the idea himself
he’s a naturally flirty guy and if he didn’t have a crush on the other person before he’s going to be so smooth with it
but then he spends time with them and he finds himself slower falling for them?
and like even if he ramps up the flirting, maybe tries to be more physical or spend more time with them, he’s not getting his message across and now he’s shooting himself in the foot for agreeing to this in the first place (and not realizing his own feelings and making a move before all of this happened)
but also maybe he’s just dense because he’s not picking up on the fact that they are doing a really bad job at hiding their feelings for him too
ALTERNATIVELY he goes into it already liking them
he thinks he’s going to be soooo smooth and charm them off their feet and then boom they’ll be dating for real
but for the first time in his life he’s stuttering and not knowing what to do and it’s really annoying how even when he’s like that, or maybe because he’s like that, he’s just as cute as he always is
he’s just a lover boy
jason
friends to lovers man seems like he needs to really trust somebody and have an emotional connection with them before pursuing a relationship
also this man canonically cannot flirt and cannot pick up on flirting so i don’t really think meet cutes are gonna work
i’m just imagining they’ve been friends for a while
it took him a really long time to open up. slowly, bit by bit, he reveals more of himself to his friend until he can honestly say they’re one of the people who knows him best
i think one of his biggest fears is not being good enough, like he’ll scare them away with all of his baggage and flaws. every time they have a late night conversation he lets his guard down a little and tests the water. he’ll give them a crumb and see how it goes. honestly, he’s terrified of their reaction but when things go well, he can’t help but want to give them more of himself
i think he’s always had bigger things in his life to worry about other than romance
is he a hopeless romantic? absolutely, if his bookshelf is anything to go by. but i think in some ways he has removed himself from that possibility a long time ago and maybe doesn’t see how he could be at all like the people in happy, loving, stable relationships that he reads about
it’ll take him a long time to realize his own emotions, much less act on them
and because of that, i think
idiots in love would also fit him very well. sorry i just think this guy is emotionally repressed and stupid and if the other person doesn’t figure shit out i don’t think he will either
i sure am roasting him a lot for someone who has a blog dedicated to him
but anyways, i feel like it would take a push for him to confess. whether that be a life threatening injury to either of them or maybe they’re getting too close to another person. i think he would need to come to terms with the fact that he could lose them and then decide that he would rather take the risk than never try
don’t think he’s making a move until he’s at least somewhat sure that the other person likes him back though
this is the best case scenario though. depending on what stage of his life he’s in when he meets somebody he likes, it could very well end up as a
right person wrong time i feel like he's also the most self-sabotaging out of all of them
like even if he met his soulmate, i think what he needs is therapy, not romance and would inevitably end up hurting himself and his partner when it turns out his own issues get in the way of his relationship
like he can't actually be fully vulnerable, not able to balance his work and personal life because what he's doing is so personal to him, not being able to settle down, that type of thing
guys i swear i want him to be happy
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short-honey-badger · 2 days ago
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Doll 4
Pairings: Shanks x Female Reader
Summary: You and Shanks drink, and Benn assures you that they're fine with you joining the crew
Warnings: Some darker thoughts from Reader. Abuse and slavery
Doll Masterlist
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The port that you met Shanks in isn’t very big, but there are enough shops around to keep the two of you entertained until the ship is ready for departure. After breakfast, you had waved goodbye to the waitress, and then the two of you were back out in the streets. Shanks kept you close, his hand tangled with your own as he pointed out what shops were for what. You knew most of what he was talking about. You weren't so sheltered that you couldn't recognize what's what, but you appreciated it nonetheless.
You quietly admitted that whatever money you'd been able to take from Sabaody had run out earlier in the week before Shanks had arrived. The redhead had waved your concerns away and assured you that now that you were part of the crew that you'd have an “allowance” for lack of a better word. Not to mention whatever cut you were given when they found any kind of treasure. They were pirates after all.
Shanks led you back to the bar where Benn and Yasopp were found at the bar, a drink in hand already, and it wasn't even noon yet. You eye them and then your captain when he orders a tankard of rum, brow cocked when he lifted it to his lips and drained a portion of it. You couldn't help but watch the way his throat worked and blushed when he caught you staring.
The redhead winked, and you huffed, “Do you always drink this early?”
Shanks shrugged a shoulder, lips turned up in a what can you do smile, “What else is there to do but drink and have a good time while we wait?”
You considered his words. The pirate wasn't wrong. It wasn't like you'd been doing much while you waited around on the island. You'd been convinced that you would have just wasted away in that corner, or eventually caught by the World Government and dragged back to Marie Geois. You sighed and then shrugged.
“Get me an ale?”
Shanks grinned and pulled out a chair for you, gesturing for you to sit with Benn and Yasopp, “Anything for you, doll.”
You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his antics and watch him lope over to the bar. While he is gone, Benn eyes the newest member of their crew, looking her over as he sips from his bottle. He doesn't mind that Shanks had brought you on, but he can only hope that you know what you're doing.
The Red-Haired Pirates weren't for the faint of heart. Benn has seen and done things that would make any normal man sick. You needed to understand that while they were carefree and accepting of her new position, they were also one of the strongest crews on the Grand Line. They are a ruthless group of pirates that took what they wanted when they wanted. Other crews had tried to take their spot and were left smoking ruins to sink into the sea. Would you be able to handle that?
“You don't mind that I'm coming with you, right?”
Her voice pushed Benn from his thoughts, and he and Yasopp focused on you. You look a bit nervous now that you've spoken up, but he can see the determined set of your shoulders.
“Even if we had protested, telling Shanks no is like telling the wind to stop blowing,” Benn grumbles and reaches for the pack of cigarettes that sits in his front pocket. He strikes a match and inhales deeply, “But no. We don't have a problem with it.”
His assurance seems to make you relax. He watches you slump back in your chair, a relieved look on your face at their easy acceptance of your presence. It makes Benn wonder what the Celestial Dragons had put you through and finds that whatever answer you would eventually give them would make him hate the bastards even more.
All your life, you've striven to have even a crumb of what these men give out for free. This easy comradery that you can see in each member of the crew. It infuriates you to an extent that you've never been able to have this, but knowing you have it now, that you can grow and thrive under these men, makes that rage cool into a warm simmer.
“Not giving _ too hard of a time, right?” Shanks interrupts as he plonks your drink in front of you and sits to your right. He eyes his first and second mate suspiciously. He'd explained your request to them last night after you'd gone to bed, and they had their concerns, but they were overall fine with you coming on board. It mostly stimmed from the fact that you came from Marie Geois, and the less the Red-Haired Pirates had to do with them, the better.
“We know better than that, Shanks. That's your department,” Yasopp snarked, and the three of you snickered at the captain's expense.
Shanks pouted, lips pursed, but you could tell that he didn’t really mind the teasing. He cut his eyes at you, giving you a pitiful look, “See what I have to deal with, Doll?”
You snicker and take a sip of your ale. The feeling of being able to fully relax is still foreign to you. Back in Marie Geois, getting caught even speaking to another slave could end in punishment. The household that had owned you were very strict in their rules and strived for perfection, and that included the people that they owned. You found it hard to be around the pirates and free people sometimes, fearful that his was all a dream and you would wake up, stuck inside your tiny closet room until your masters called for you.
A warm hand on your thigh makes you jump. You flick your eyes down to see that your captain’s hand spred wide, his thumb dragging soothing circles against your covered flesh even as he banters back and forth with his crew mates. It makes your heart beat a little faster, knowing that Shanks had noticed the drop in your mood so easily.
Should it make you uncomfortable how quickly the redhead seemed to read you? Maybe, but you couldn’t find the strength to care very much about it. The feeling of having someone like Shanks looking out for you was heady and one that you wouldn’t give up without a fight. Knowing how strong the redhead is was one of the biggest reasons that you had asked him for help in the first place. The slave rumor mill was a wide and varied one. You’ve always been a better listener than a rambler in the first place.
Still staring at his hand, it makes you think about his words back in the bakery. Shanks had told the waitress that he was taken and hadn’t told you otherwise afterward, only that he’d wanted the other woman to leave the two of you alone. Would someone like your captain even want someone as messed up as you? As scared and branded? The thought makes you frown, so you try your best to shove it down and focus on the conversation flowing around you.
Shanks eyes the woman beside him. He had practically felt your dark thoughts permeating the air around you, but it seemed like his touch had swiftly brought you out of them. He wished he could tell what you were thinking. If you liked him touching you, because Shanks doesn’t want to stop. He wants to touch you all the time, even if it’s something as small as holding your hand. Shanks wanted to push your limits to see how far you would let him go.
But he also didn't want to make you uncomfortable, to make it seem like now that just because you were a part of his crew that he had some kind of ownership over you. The thought made his stomach churn in disgust. Shanks didn't want you to think he was anything like the people you escaped from. He wanted to be your savior, the man that you could depend on for anything. He couldn't do that if you didn't trust him.
So Shanks would be patient. He would get to know you for you, let whatever mutual attraction the two of you had for one another bloom naturally. Allow you to set whatever pace you deemed fit, and be happy that you wanted his attention in the first place.
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mercurialmalcontent · 1 day ago
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I keep turning the events of Tearstone Island going into the Fade sequence over in my head. They're so good, and going in completely unspoiled (and thus un-influenced) with a character who I'd come with with a distinct personality for really enhanced the experience.
Mimir is a person not given to having regrets. He acts with deliberation in almost all things, so when he makes a difficult decision it's after having considered the potential ramifications and what burdens he's willing to live with, should it turn out he chose poorly after all. This attitude was sorely tested after he chose to go to Minrathous to repel their dragon attack rather than Treviso (especially once he learned the Venatori were still able to infiltrate the Archon's palace). The blight that infected the city killed so many innocents and shut Lucanis away from him. It was unfair for the residents to blame him for not being able to be in two places at once, but he couldn't blame them for that, not in the aftermath of an apocalyptic disaster.
It would have been easy to wallow in regret but he set his mind on restitution, as much as he could give.
Tearstone, though… Mimir chose Davrin to lead the second strike team, having every faith that he could lead the others through the blighted areas safely. He asked Bellara to clear their way through the magic gate; despite her continued uncertainity in her skills, Mimir had seen her come through time and time again, and Neve's proposal seemed way too risky.
Bellara and Davrin were like siblings to Mimir, the family he'd never had. Bellara made him smile and made him think and he was immediately ready to give her backup when other people didn't want to take her seriously. Davrin he wasn't sure he'd get along with until it turned out they were on the exact same wavelength (game-wise, I got so much approval his bond level was much higher than anyone else's for most of the game). It was like turning a corner and coming face-to-face with a twin he'd never dreamed he had. Emmerich was Mimir's best friend, but Davrin was his brother in every way except blood.
Then his faith in Bellara lost her, snatched away to who knows where. There was no time to think, no time to do anything but act and ignore the clench of his heart, no time to do anything but fight and fight and fight and not panic that she's not there to be freed. The team battered that tentacled horror's defenses and Davrin distracted her so Lucanis could take his shot-- and then he was gone, ripped apart and dragged into the abyss with Assan screaming after him. That scream rang unending in Mimir's ears as he struggled his way to the dagger before it could rip reality apart -- or was he the one screaming?
Then Solas's inevitable betrayal hit and oh, man. Even though Mimir didn't trust him -- even though I knew better than to trust him -- there was still a crumb of hope that, maybe, maybe he'd work together with us. But no, he claimed Mimir wasn't ready for leadership until he molded him that way, molded him to take his place in that miserable Fade prison. So arrogant, almost mocking! That bleak moment I felt the outrage, fury, despair, and yes, regret that I'd been set up to feel, and it was incredible!
Small wonder it took weeks to get him out of there -- even stalwart Mimir struggled desperately after all of that, asking himself what he missed, what he could have done to save Bellara and Davrin, as I was asking myself that. (I know now that there is no right choice there; it's a moment of sometimes you do your best and still fail.) But the personality he has that I stuck with throughout the game turned out to have been a perfect choice, as the specter of Varric echoed so many of the qualities I'd created Mimir to have.
He's not like Solas. Solas didn't mold shit. When Mimir told Solas he'd do whatever it takes, he meant "whatever the personal cost to myself"; it was Solas's own self-absorbed baggage that he understood it as "whatever the cost to other people."
I'm reminded of the Dark Knight questline in FFXIV, specifically the lv. 70 capstone quest, when Fray -- or rather, Esteem, the Warrior of Light's shadow self -- says, "I've sins aplenty, aye, but regrets? Not so much."
That's Mimir. Whatever his mistakes, whatever his sins, he endeavors to live without regrets -- which means approaching life with a clear head and no excuses for himself.
One more relevant quote from that questline:
Fray: Such is our lot. Such is the fate of all who are born ─- to suffer and to die. Do not seek forgiveness, for it will not ease the burden. It weighs as it should. Myste: But what of the lost? Do they not deserve to live again? Rielle: They do. In our hearts and our souls and our memories. No one likes having to say good-bye. But it's… it's a part of life. That's what makes the time we share together so precious… You can't obsess over the mistakes of the past, or you'll lose sight of the future. Of the people still with us, who need us more than ever.
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dinosaurcharcuterie · 9 months ago
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I could say that I messed up bad on my first two batches of blondies. Nothing burned, the flavor was right, but the texture and consistency were way off. Like, I somehow missed fudgy, chewy and cakey and ended up at the hard crack candy stage. On a tray bake. Which was also oily af on the bottom. (Long story short: batter height matters, don't pour bubbling hot butter into room temp ingredients.)
Instead of admitting failure, we're gonna call this a learning experience and also an opportunity to make the world's most failsafe brownies.
youtube
The lady presenting this is a trained food scientist, but I'm still amazed each time I make this, either from stale baked goods, or cake scraps or "hide the evidence" situations. The batter just looks wrong. Every time as I'm patting it into the mold at a different height, it looks like it's gonna fail in a different way. Too stiff, too dry, too grainy, too imbalanced with whatever crumbs it's based on this time. This time, I think, this time it won't work. Especially if it's made with a failed bake.
20-25 minutes later, there's brownies. Sometimes cakier, sometimes fudgier, and not always the prettiest, but always yummy.
So I might have messed up, but no one is going to find any blondie brittle in our house. Brownies are on the counter in the haribo tub, though.
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that-spider-fan-over-there · 8 months ago
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I've been thinking about Ochako's role in the story, and thinking about how underdeveloped she was compared to Izuku, Shoto or Katsuki's, which got me thinking about it and since the manga's in its final arc and there's nothing to lose, why the heck not.
If Izuku is set up as someone born with "nothing", Shoto as born with "everything" and Katsuki as someone who was born loved, why not set Ochako as someone who wanted to give back love? It'd be a nice four-way connection/foil, considering she should've been set up as one of the main players of BNHA.
Ochako foiling Shoto alongside Izuku and Katsuki as born and raised in a loving environment, and how they've responded in comparison to his broken family unit - since she's the poorest classmates with humble beginnings and he's the son of a top 10 hero;
Ochako foiling Izuku alongside Shoto and Katsuki as born with something he "lacks" in comparison - which is both opportunity his Quirkless background wouldn't give and his shattered sense of self worth, compared to her who would be okay with being anything else but decided to be a hero for the money she could provide for her family;
Ochako foiling Katsuki alongside Izuku and Shoto as someone who started off as a hero who wants to help others in contrast to his motivation to be a hero who never loses a battle, with her sharing that same competitive streak and fighting edge while ultimately focusing on helping others before her. (Which is something Izuku does fill in the story but it could've worked imo)
This is partly because I want to imagine if she was part of the Endeavor Internship Arc, she'd benefit from forming a deep bond with the main deuteragonists on some level, if only to take her out of the preconceived notion she's there to be Izuku's love interest first and foremost- removing that aspect or using that expectation she's there to revolve around him to make her "one of the boys", give her the rotating spotlight a bit more.
But also it'd be a nice setup as as she could compare her background to Shoto and reflect on how she perceived the ideal hero vs. how flawed they can actually be, and her reason to be there could've been she's looking for a way to be strong in a way that can properly help others after Sir Nighteye's death. Imagine the bond they'd have if they were allowed to interact with each other the same way they do with Izuku and Tenya.
The less wealthy classmate with a loving and supportive family and the most wealthy and well-known classmate with a broken and dysfunctional family, two of Izuku's closer friends being inspired by him and trying to break away from the labels others pushed on them and be their own people? One with envy for a villain who reminds her of feelings she wanted to bottle up and the other whose villain's anger mirrored his former to his consumed his family for years? And yet both coming out of their experiences wanting to extend their hands to Himiko and Touya, to start anew and ease that pain?
And with the Paranormal Liberation Front Arc, you could still split her up but using that as a build up, with her and Shoto following Izuku and Katsuki, but she sees people in need of saving and decides to help others instead; make her confrontation with Himiko happen before Dabi's Dance; then let her join the battlefield shakened after spotting Gigantomachia from a distance. (Would it be cluttered? A little, but that arc was already somewhat cluttered, coming from someone who loves that arc A Lot.)
And to avoid her from being too OP, one could make her try to fight but still thinking of Himiko's tears while using her grappling hooks or Zero Gravity on debris to stop Gigantomachia- it could've foreshadow the conflicting emotions she feels are allowing her to surpass her own limits there and come back full force during her fight with Himiko later on, similar to Katsuki with his Cluster technique or Shoto developing Phosphor.
And imagine her worldview shattering even more from finding out a hero would fall so deep into obsession into being the greatest, he lost sight it what it means to be a hero and it created his own villain. Wouldn't that push her even further to try and be a hero the others can rely on, and later, the one Himiko needed? After all, if Ochako and Himiko already parallel, let's use the love thematics; they both love passionately, and unlike Himiko, Ochako didn't give up on a better world for everyone- she just realized what everyone entails.
Just thoughts from someone who'd love to see Ochako breaking out of that label of "love interest"- love and passion are a defining part of her, but her crush shouldn't be her defined role, the story itself has realized that. But it could've realized a lot sooner. It probably wouldn't have removed the fandom's perception of her, but it would've helped her in the long run, especially when the merch set her up as even more of an protagonist, and to an extent it feels like the fans want to believe she was planned to be like that when we know Horikoshi was playing around with her character until he finally settled on what to do with Himiko and wrote Ochako around it.
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valdotjpg · 3 months ago
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hey boss, any thoughts on the upcoming elden ring dlc? ur fromsoft takes are always enlightened
dont quote me on this but i thjnk miquella might be in it.
#MORE SERIOUS ANSWER: i still havent played it but since this was sent to me before it came out i assume its ok to just#write out my general thoughts. its sweet of u to say that my takes are enlightened btw haha im glad u think so.. that being said i#i dont think i have anything to say that hasnt been said already#the story trailer is soooooo. aughghh#the thing im most excited abt is the high probability that it sheds some light on the past of TLB like other fromsoft dlcs tend to do#also the equally high probability of getting more of st trina.... everyone and their mom has always been curious abt all that cut content#and if theyd ever explore it some more in the future#seeing omen-like horns in the trailer and promo material n such is especially intriguing to me bc im rlly invested in that side of the lore#(i love my grandpa who beats me with a stick)#and im still hoping that theres a crumb of shadow (as in. the wolves) content in there but it seems highly unlikely now haha#new weapons and gorgeous views to uncover & music are always exciting ofc. and so are the new npcs i hope at least one of em is either#a sweetheart i'll fall in love with or a freak i wont be able to stop thinking abt. fromsoft characters hit different#i have some concerns as well though. specifically gameplay-wise: i rlly hope that the map isnt too big bc while i LOVED er i still have my#qualms w/ some open-world scope problems it suffers from. mainly the reuse of certain enemies & minibosses. in the grand scheme of things#its not that big of a deal but i really hope that they took their sweet time working on smth smaller#n didnt spread themselves too thing ykwim#bc if they make me fight 20 more tree asylum demons and those loathesome root worms i might just cry LOL#er spoilers#ps sorry for the super late reply!!
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keeps-ache · 6 months ago
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thinking of fairies that look like ferret + mourning doves. uh huh yep :>
#just me hi#ferret + seagull. otter + sparrow. snake + goose#give those wiggly creatures some more wiggle room hfbvsh :3#wouldn't they be neat!!#giving the snake goose parts because geese are cool. yea :>>#specifically canadian geese because they are some of my favorite bird lol#not for any good reason but i grew up with them and they are cool :D#mouse + pigeon. it would be so precious man [<- tears in eyes]#what other animals do i know? uuhmm#electric eel + american eagle. all for the worst reasons hgbfhshv#i don't know if electric eels are so mean but it would be funny finding out that way lmao :3#/NAH but a teeny mouse with a teeny frock with teeny pigeon wings. she has a little basket of bread crumbs. are you seeing it#pigeons <333#/giraffe + swan. they shall soar like none before hbsh#hmmm. humphead fish + hummingbird. i believe in him. he would do so well hfsvhhfs#wonder what kinda magic they would all do !#//anywho i have my things and stuffs i should be doing lol </3#recently i've been consistently overjoyed with remembering that i have something to work on hfsh#but it all feels like a lot rn. ooh well! i think i'll work on my panels :>#that or watch a movie. depends which one will tire me out faster lol#i need to. find an hour+ long video to listen to. ouhg#i haven't finished one playlist i was listening to but i wiped my yt history so i don't know where i was hhhhhh#there are lik 8 videos and they're all a little over an hour long#a refresher wouldn't hurt but ourh. ouuhrrh. hfbhs#//i'm gonna try to get to it then !! :)#i always end up reblogging like a thousand things before i ever get to anything though lmao - let's seeeee#toodles pool noodles :>
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wibble-wobbegong · 2 years ago
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sits in silence for five minutes before turning around with my hand in the air AND HERES ANOTHER THING ABOUT OWENS AND HENRY-
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i-jus-kitten · 2 years ago
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goldensunset · 2 years ago
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Happy one month until tears of the kingdom 🎉
WAUGH YOU’RE RIGHT
#time is passing soso quickly…#june 2019 feels like it was only yesterday#we’ve really been waiting for this game for almost four years huh#now suddenly it’s like that’s way too soon oh man just a month#can’t believe it’s even happening feels like this was never supposed to be a real game just a myth#i’m gonna be out of school in less than a month… probably working in less than a month…#funny my brother has been saying for years now ‘once botw2 comes out i’m gonna request an entire week off of work’ LOL#imagine if i did that lol. hey i know i’ve been here for two days but it’s really important i need to play this game right now#man this summer is about to be lit… a real and interesting job… a game i’ve been waiting for for years…#i’ll be in class for the final trailer tomorrow AUGH#maybe i just shouldn’t watch it anyway. like just to avoid spoilers#i wanna go in as blind as possible actually#me from a year or so ago would’ve NEVER passed up the chance to get more info on totk but that’s bc i needed crumbs to sustain me#but now it’s like. hey it’ll be here in a month anyway and i’ve got other stuff to do in that time#same with the gameplay showcase i haven’t seen that#i’ve had all the relevant tags filtered on here for like a month ever since the art book leaked#just gonna leave ‘em on#once we get closer to the date itself i might eventually log off indefinitely#actually that’s probably gonna happen anyway#if it’s anything like last summer having a job and a game to play over the summer means i don’t need tumblr to fill my time#anyway this has been a ramble sorry#asks#rosie-kairi
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fingertipsmp3 · 2 years ago
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#just did my annual checkup on what my ex-friend cal (a horrible human being) is doing now because i remain convinced that he’s going to#murder someone one day and i’m going to have to call round all our old high school friends and be like ‘see i told you so’#and tell me why he has a really beautiful girlfriend. like. WHAT#when i tell you this man is unwashed and unkempt and has serial killer eyes. he’s HORRENDOUS#even if he didn’t look like a walking mugshot the things that come out of his mouth are repellent#what the hell has he been doing. what is GOING ON#unless he’s had some sort of glow up both in appearance and personality that i cannot see because he never posts; i can only come up with#two explanations#1) he’s paying her bills (extremely possible. he’ll do literally anything for a crumb of pussy but also he is really good at math and IT#and i think he has a pretty decent tech support job now)#or 2) she is clinically insane. or thinks she can fix him. which amounts to the same thing#honestly the amount of girls i have seen who thought he was a great guy is too damn high considering what a scumbag he is#he changes his interests and personality in order to get with a girl and will do literally anything for her and then the emotional abuse#starts. i have seen it over and over. i’m pretty sure i was the prototype for his MO!!!#anyway the temptation to message her asking why she’s doing charity work and then turn off my phone is too damn high lmao#this man literally looks like a mouldy foot; meanwhile her profile photo is a selfie she took with a hot male celebrity#who i didn’t recognise at first and was like ‘oh maybe that’s her ex boyfriend’ because IT MADE SENSE. i could see that happening!!#she’s that hot. WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING WITH CAL#thanks for listening to my spiral if you did#personal
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simonbrain · 3 months ago
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love the idea of reader just trying to fuck all her stress out with a random at the bar before returning back to her mundane life, and simon deciding he's going to keep her instead 🙂‍↕️
the prick doesn't budge when you try to kick him out; instead, he drags you back into bed and works his mouth to loosen you up again, and now you've forgotten why you were trying to haul his ass out of your home.
(you attempted to sound stern while telling him to get out of your house, but he merely chuckled, the sound so raspy and condescending that it stroked a heat within you that you thought was sated last night.
"this is our home. now get your arse back in bed, i'm fuckin' hungry.")
you had to really fist at his hair to pull him off of you, and that only turned him on if the deep groan rumbling out of him was anything to go by—you swear his tongue sunk deeper inside you. he only relented so he could fuck you dumb in the shower after, leaving you with trembling legs and feeling more dirty than clean (atta girl, don't you waste any of tha'—keep it all in).
you blink, and now suddenly you're seated as he spoon-feeds you a nice, hearty breakfast, huffing something like messy girl when toast crumbs get all over your face and the wooden table.
words can't express how flustered you are; you're too stunned to even continue telling the big man who's now feeding you scrambled eggs that he needs to leave. all you feel like you're capable of doing is opening your mouth to accept another spoonful, ignoring the ache you feel between your thighs when you catch his heavy stare and hear a low hum of approval.
then he's leaving (and it's not because of your nagging), muttering something about having to work those mutts to the bone today, all while you're trying to make sense of what's happening. he gives you a sloppy kiss to silence your questions and exasperation, one that makes you feel hot all over and almost melt into a puddle had it not been for the firm grip he had on your ass.
he licks his lips when he pulls back, eyes darting to where your shirt just barely covers where he'd rather be all day than having to go and train recruits. he stares for an uncomfortably long time and before you can speak up, face growing a little hot from the tension, he's turning around to finally leave.
before the door shuts, he says, "be a good girl, ay? see you tonight, birdie."
you're left with your thoughts and feelings of dread and anxiety. there definitely isn't any underlying interest or anything; the freak has fucked your brain out of your head, that's all. you're sure he didn't even mean it anyway. maybe. hopefully.
a drop of his come rolls down your thigh, and arousal shame burns through you. since when did you let one-night stands finish in you?
(your so-called one-night stand came home hungry and pissed, so worked up that he dragged you over to the nearest surface and played with you for a good hour. by the time you had half the mind to tell him about the dinner in the oven—your eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets at how much money he had sent you for groceries earlier, nevermind how he got ahold of your account details—he grunted and finally gave your poor pussy a break, scarred mug all slick and flushed.)
good luck when he takes you to meet his mates at the bar a week later, the same bar you brought him home from; the comments from them make you wish a hole in the ground would just swallow you right up.
"pretty thing ye caught, lt," johnny grins, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. he's a bit over the top, ogles your chest too hard, but overall he's... alright. you'd probably notice how perverted he really was if you actually looked at him longer than a few fleeting glances, but his stare is kind of unnerving.
kyle—perfection personified—hums in agreement, a warm smile on his face that puts you at ease. somehow you don't pick up on the ulterior motive behind his gaze running over your body, eyes roaming over your chest more discreetly than johnny but just as appreciative. "pretty indeed. you don't mind sharing, do you ghost?" kyle teases, pretty eyes glancing over at simon, who only huffs at that and shakes his head (much to your confusion).
who the fuck is ghost? you only know big guy and simon.
there's a deep chuckle and your focus flits over to the man seated in front of you, captain john price. if you thought simon was scary, john's a man who demands respect and attention just by being in his presence. "you chose the wrong dog to bring home," john hums, voice deep and gravelly and making you shamefully squeeze your thighs together.
"but that's alright, sweetheart. you have three others now, yeah?" the purr that comes out of his mouth is sinful, and when you nod and stammer out a yes, sir as if you were one of his soldiers and not the sweet girl that simon has brought to his captain, looking for approval of his newest toy, he only smiles.
simon's hand squeezes your thigh underneath the table, trailing upwards, and you're slowly understanding what it is that you've gotten yourself into.
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teamfortresstwo · 1 year ago
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Still clinging on to the hope that TMP is going to be non-eye coded. I hope it’s like web or spiral or fuck if it’s corruption or lonely that’s be great!
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sant-riley · 1 year ago
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[Touchy feely] [tf141 headcanons]
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(Romantic impied Task force 141 boys x gender neutral!reader headcanons :))
Summary: Being the sweetheart of the task force means the boys are not shy about the fact that they're all simps and always want some sort of contact with you at all times.
Consists of romantic/suggestive headcanons for each of the guys and little things they do with you <3
Words: about 1.5k (this was supposed to be short, whoops)
Warnings/Info: Can be read separately but it is intended that they all harbor feelings for you at the same time, possibly out of character for everyone, some swearing, the guys manhandle you, as always, let me know if I miss something!
Thinking about how each of the boys is so touchy with you, it doesn't matter where you are or who you're with, they're shameless.
Other units and teams who will sometimes share the base with 141 know better than to ask questions or directly say anything to one of the guys or you for that matter. Not that they could anyway, seeing as you always have at least one of them attached to your hip.
Price:
Anyone who walks into Price's office late at night to turn something in is used to seeing you next to the Captain on the little dingy loveseat he has in there.
John is usually smoking a cigar, taking care to not blow smoke your way while your head is resting on his shoulder. Your eyes closed as you hum at his words. It's terribly domestic for a military base.
John likes to gently play with your hair while he speaks about missions he's been on, always somehow trying to braid despite not knowing how to for jack shit, whether it because it's you or just the mindless motion, he's not willing to say.
John will usually walk you back to your room after dinner or time in his office unless he's swamped with work.
A small hand on the small of your back while he leads you. It's always a respectable touch, though he tucks you into his side, nodding at everyone you may pass.
If you're comfortable with it, he likes to press a kiss to your head, smiling that goofy ass smile, and tells you to get a good night's rest.
He lets you help him trim up his beard, he won't let you do all of it but he likes the closeness of it, him sitting down while you gently shape it up, tilting his head up and he tries his best to not stare directly at your chest.
The fact that he's letting you this close to his neck with a razor is a sign of trust, maybe small for others but for a man that doesn't drop his guard and doesn't truly trust others, it speaks volumes.
The first time he let you, you were barely putting any pressure and he grabbed your hand in his and showed you. "You're not gonna hurt me, put more force into it, yeah?"
Don't get me started on going out on walks in London with Price, he wraps you up in his beanie and some big leather jacket he has that dwarves you, helping you move through crowds by once again holding the small of your back, or taking your smaller hand in his. (He doesn't correct anyone if they mistake you as married)
He likes to kiss the back of your hand and laughs when it makes you blush and sputter out that his beard is scratchy.
Ghost:
Ghost is a subtle one, he won't actively reach for you or your hand but he does have some part of him against you most times.
Whether it be his leg, arm, or thigh, anything works. A normal place yall will be seen together is in the dining hall, you've both learned to ignore the stares from everyone else.
Simon never eats there, just sits with you until you're finished and then you both move on to either his quarters or somewhere else so he can peel his mask up to eat a bit.
However, while you're eating and telling him about anything under the sun, he'll lean over and wipe some crumbs off of your mouth with his thumb softly, which again, you're used to so okay whatever but Recruits always are taken aback in their seats.
Ghost's reflexes kick into overdrive with you. His hand going to cover a corner of a table 9/10 times before you completely wreck your shit, but when he does miss (sometimes on purpose).
He'll bring a hand up to rub at your head for you, chuckling under his breath before cooing down at you "That hurt pretty? Sure look like it did."
Whenever you two specifically are paired onto a mission, doesn't matter if any of the guys complain, he will share a cot/tent with you. He claims he runs the hottest (he doesn't, it's Johnny but he will not lose on this) and can keep your body the warmest.
He pretty much lugs you on top of him and wraps his arms around your waist, he'll press a hand against your head if you keep fidgeting, rasping at you to go to sleep. He takes great pride in the fact that you're usually out like a light very shortly.
I've said it once and I'll say it again, Ghost likes to hook a finger into your body straps and pull it really hard and let it smack you to get your attention if you're not actively paying attention to him, he'll soothe the area but he's smirking behind that fucking mask.
On that note, he definitely does the "You got something right here." And points at your chest and immediately pull up to flick your nose hard as fuck, he KNOWS his own strength but sometimes your eyes water and he immediately feels bad.
Ghost rests his head on your chest a lot, he finds your heartbeat to be soothing and reassuring, also grunts if you don't wrap your arms around him in return, bro literally shoves his head into you and groans
This is a grown man but it's cute so you let it slide bc he'll never ask for it outright, he just assumes you'll cradle his head.
Soap:
Johnny is the most shameless motherfucker here, I'm talking about draping himself over you, grabbing at your cheeks, ruffling your hair, kissing you dangerously close to your lips (it drives the others mad), he's the most unapologetic about it and will gloat to the others.
Manhandler #1, isn't above grabbing you by your hips and picking you up to move you somewhere, he's literally gone and grabbed you from some rookies side to come stand next to him with a smile and you're just so used to it that you just shrug and go along with it. (He gets slightly jealous, why would you stand next to some random ass dude and not him??)
Throws you over his shoulder, or likes you to cling to his front or his back and just carries you, he says it's a comfortable weight. If you ever dare say you're too heavy, he's gonna go to the gym and work out even more to PROVE to you that he simply doesn't care, he will carry you.
Extremely bad habit of sneaking into your room to fall asleep with you, Price has come into your room many times to see Soap sprawled on top of you, he's drooling and snoring and you're knocked the fuck out (he's like a glorified weighted blanket).
I've touched on this before but he only wants you to cut his hair for him, yeah he can go to the barber on base but he much prefers you and loves it when you scratch at his scalp. He also likes to just have his head in between your thighs but that's something else for another time-
Soap specifically slings you over his shoulder a lot, especially off base where he truly doesn't have any fucks to give.
You're not going to bed because you have other work?? Too bad, shoulder time you go. You're not willing to get up and make yourself food? Good thing he's here, either pick what you want from the kitchen or throw some clothes on bc he IS dragging you out of the house.
Johnny likes to draw on you a lot, it ranges from scribbles, to sometimes his name if he's feeling cheeky (he's drawn it on your thigh before and you didn't notice until Gaz shot you a look), to intricate drawings of whatever he can think whether it be a landscape or an animal.
He always holds you steady and it isn't uncommon for your limbs to fall asleep but it's worth it, if only to see him smile.
Gaz:
Gaz is probably the most secretly clingy person out of the four, he CAN function without your touch but does he PREFER to? No.
His first instinct in any situation is to grab you and shield you, he's the fastest of the four so his body moves without thinking and it's saved you more times than any of you would like to count.
The one mission where you both fell out of a moving truck, he tucked your body into his despite it costing him his shoulder popping out of the socket, you couldn't help but freak out while Ghost moved to pop it back into place.
"Why the fuck would you do that? Look at your arm!" "It's nothing." "Garrick what the fuck-"
When you're out anywhere off base, he's holding your hand, good luck trying to pull away bc he is not letting go. Too bad so sad, resign to your fate.
I think Gaz is definitely good at dancing, at least with you and when the right music is on, you cannot tell me this man wouldn't twirl you around and shit-fight me on it. He'll even lift you off your feet, laughing when you scramble to grab at his shoulders.
He goes stark still if you rest your head on his shoulder, not because he's nervous but because he's worried about waking you up when he knows you deserve a rest.
He'll usually wrap his arm around your shoulder to hold you in place so the heli ride doesn't jostle you so much, gentleness rubbing his knuckles along your arm to soothe you.
Gaz is the one who holds you when you have nightmares, on rare occasions when Soap isn't in your room and you just need to be held with no talking, you always without thinking find yourself in Kyle's room, his arms wrapped around your waist as he tucks your head under his chin, no questions asked.
He'll maybe hum a tune to help you relax but other than that, he lets you lead the way.
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norrisainz33 · 13 days ago
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announcement || mv33
☆ summary: max and his private wife have been keeping a big secret
☆ pairing: max verstappen x private!nonfamous!wife!reader
☆ fc & warnings: amata alp & mentions of pregnancy
☆ requested: yes! thank you for your patience 🫶🏻
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
ynverstappen has posted to their story 🔒
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maxverstappen1: glad you’re with y/bff tho i do wish you were here my love
ynverstappen: i wish i was there too. i hate having to miss your races
maxverstappen1: i know you do sweetheart but you’ve got big things to worry about right now 🤍
ynverstappen: i know i just wish you were here to worry about them with me!
ynverstappen: ugh i’m sorry i know you have no choice in the matter
maxverstappen1: don’t apologize liefje. i know this is not like the easiest time for me to be away! i will be home so soon so i can help take care of you
carmenmundt: y/n where have you beeeeeeen it’s been so long!!
ynverstappen: been very busy with work and with holding down the fort here in monaco!! i hope to be back at some races soon 🤍
alexandrasaintmleux: gorgeous girl i miss you
ynverstappen: i miss you too babes
yourbff: my baby
ynverstappen: my girl
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f1gossip: during todays redline stream the chat was flooded with questions about the whereabouts of y/n verstappen who has been absent from the paddock for the past couple of months. while y/n is relatively private and we don’t usually get many social media updates from her outside of her interior design firm’s posting, she almost never misses the opportunity to support max on a race weekend let alone several in a row. max assured the chat that y/n was ok and that she was just taking some time to herself and that she’d be back in the paddock soon enough. what do you all make of this?
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user1: i’m so glad y/nmax are fine
user2: you could even hear her in the background at one point asking max what he wanted for dinner!! glad we are getting some crumbs
user4: omg ok good!! i thought that was her but couldn’t tell
user3: i was about to email her interior design firm to ask if she was ok thank god max updated us
user4: walk with me here guys…. what if we haven’t seen her bc she’s…… pregnant???
user6: oh my god you might be on to something!! they have been married for almost 2 years now
user7: no this is so believable!!! they’d make the best parents
user5: y/n’s ability to stay under the radar and unbothered is incredible
user8: y/n is the coolest wag i wish she was chronically online like so many of the others
user7: ugh fr!! i wish we could follow her on literally anything 💔
ynverstappen has posted to their story 🔒
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francisca.cgomes: are you redoing part of your house? is this why you’ve been so busy and i haven’t seen my best friend for WEEKS
ynverstappen: partially yes!! we are redoing the spare room. BUT you’ll see me this weekend for my party kiks
francisca.cgomes: and my god i can’t wait!! i miss you
ynvertsappen: i miss you too
landonorris: plans for what?
ynverstappen: idk 🤷🏻‍♀️
landonorris: liar!
maxverstappen1: they’re going to have the sweetest room 🤍
ynverstappen: yes they are 🤍 i’m so proud of how it’s turning out
georgerussell63: the 🤭 makes this feel like i’m on the outside of an inside joke
ynverstappen: you just might be georgie!!
georgerussell63: well what does that even mean
yourbff: i am brimming with excitement i can’t wait for you to tell everyone this weekend
ynverstappen: me too!! keeping this secret has been so tough but ultimately it’s been really nice to have something that’s just for me and max even if just for a short while
yourbff: no i totally get that y/n/n!! max has to share his life with the whole world so im sure it’s nice to have those private moments
yoursibling: i need you to facetime me when you tell carmen and kika bc they’re going to lose their minds
ynverstappen: oh i absolutely will
ynverstappen has made a post 🔒
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ynverstappen: i’m so glad all my favorite people could come celebrate the news 🩷 baby verstappen due in january 🤍 mommy and daddy love you endlessly already 💙
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carmenmundt: i can’t wait to be an aunty!!! best news ever 🤍
ynverstappen: and i can’t wait for you to be an aunty!! baby v is going to be so loved
carmenmundt: they already are!!
francisca.cgomes: can’t believe my favorite person in the world is going to be a mom 🥹
ynverstappen: love you kika 🥹
maxverstappen1: 💙🩷
ynverstappen: 😘😘
iamrebeccad: you’re going to make the perfect mom
ynverstappen: i really hope so 🤍
georgerussell63: blimey! i can’t wait to meet the little one!!
ynverstappen: only 3 more months!!
landonorris: uncle lando is reporting for duty
ynverstappen: baby v is going to love their uncle lan!!
maxverstappen1: baby v is already lucky to have you mate
alexandrasaintmleux: the most beautiful maman 🤍
ynverstappen: don’t make me cry again 😭
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maxverstappen1: grateful for moments like these away from the track. next week is race week again in vegas but for now, enjoy some family photos 🤍
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user1: my favorite couple maybe ever
user3: y/n sign of life!!
user4: sticking to my delulu and thinking he said family bc she’s having a baby
landonorris: see you all soon🤍
ynverstappen: see you soon lannyyyyyy
user4: he’s feeding into my delusions here…. bc why did he say you all instead of you both
user6: omg does this mean y/n will be in vegas????
ynverstappen: i love our little family 🫶🏻
maxverstappen1: me too gorgeous
user2: not me crying over this post?? the heart shaped pizzas sent me over the edge
redbullracing: looking forward to seeing you back on track!
ynverstappen has added to their story 🔒
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maxverstappen1: i have a tracker on your flight. i think the anxiety of you and the little one being on a plane without me is going to eat me alive
ynverstappen: we will be ok maxie i promise!! im on air max, it’s safe here
maxverstappen1: it is but also i’m not there so it’s not as safe as it could be
ynverstappen: my sweet boy, take a deep breath. you have quali soon
maxverstappen1: yes yes yes i’m breathing deeply
francisca.cgomes: well thank GOD i need you in the paddock
ynverstappen: pls come stay in rb hospitality w me
francisca.cgomes: for you i will just don’t tell pierre
charlesleclerc: on a scale of 1-10 how stressed is max
ynverstappen: 16
redbullracing: we can’t wait to see you!!
iamrebeccad: yayayayayayya!!!!!!!
ynverstappen: 😘😘😘😘😘😘
maxverstappen1 has made a post
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maxverstappen1: for all of you wondering where y/n has been…. needless to say we’ve both been a little busy getting ready to welcome baby verstappen. only a few more months till the little one makes us a family of 3 🤍
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user1: best news ever!!!!
user4: i knew it!!! omg 🥹
charlesleclerc: congratulations mate! i am so excited for you both
maxverstappen1: thank you charles 💙 baby v is so lucky to have an uncle like you
user16: im violently sobbing over this interaction you don’t understand
redbullracing: having a mini rb20 made for baby v as we speak
ynverstappen: oh gosh admin no
maxverstappen1: admin yes!!
redbullracing: uh oh awkward
landonorris: yayyyyyy!!!!!!!! i can’t wait to babysit!!
ynverstappen: you’re going to be the best babysitter ever
user7: she is glowing
user9: max and y/n are going to make the most beautiful parents
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f1gossip: here to share a recap of max’s first interview since announcing y/n’s pregnancy mere minutes after qualifying. he said he wanted to announce it before sunday because y/n was absolutely adamant about being in the paddock for vegas and there was no hiding her baby bump at 6 months. max said “i can’t wait to be a dad! it’s honestly something i’ve been dreaming of for years and i’m so grateful to my beautiful wife for giving me the greatest gift.”
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user2: this is by far the happiest i’ve ever seen max and i am crying
user4: i love max and y/n so much i cant
user15: the way he talked about their baby ??? he already loves that little one so much
user18: i think having a baby is healing his inner child
user3: i love love love love love these 2
user19: crying screaming throwing up
user20: project verstappen!! lfg!!! next wdc champion incoming
user5: her refusing to miss another race is so real of her
user8: thank god she’s gonna be back in the paddock max needs her luck
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
a/n: thanks for reading!! likes and reblogs always appreciated 🤍
゚. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ゚
disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction
© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform
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chewablepebbles · 1 year ago
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#i got into my car to go to work this morning and everything was fine it was okay#i didnt have time to sit and eat breakfast at home so i grabbed some pizza rolls to eat in my car#and while im driving along and eat i feel something fall just in the collar of my shirt#so i think its a crumb (naturally) and go to swipe it away#and i get STUNG so i bash and smash and mash my collarbone and i get STUNG again but!#afterwards i dont feel anything so i figure ill find out what bug it was when i park and get the corpse out of my shirt#i drive along some more ending up behind a cop car when i feel something. crawling at the base of my neck#so very carefully to not change the position of my head and neck i pull down the mirror and its a YELLOWJACKET#and i cant do anything because my ultraviolence before did not seemingly do anything#and i dont want to get stung anymore#my plan is to make it to work. go inside. ask my coworker to remove it from wherever it has since disappeared to#i get to work without further incident. i speed walk inside. the first person i see is the new guy so i introduce myself#and then go 'i have a really big favor to ask. i think theres a yellowjacket in my hair can you get it out i will owe you fifty bucks.'#he looks and finds no yellowjacket. i believe that it flew off while i walked from my car to the restaurant#i jokingly recount this to my favorite coworker#FIVE MINUTES LATER#i feel the crawling on the side of my neck again. i am slightly allergic to bees so i have been watching for swelling#but it is yet too early to see.#so i feel the crawling again and go to the front where both coworkers are and ask 'is it there again' and they go YES#and then lightly smack at my neck to get it off so they can crush it#i had been awake for an hour.#anyway#the rest of my day was normal this was just insane#jabberjos#Spotify
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