#but they dont feel undo guilt when they cant

[elfcollector]

had 2 kill rolan </3

[shmingleping]

Meh.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Getting into an argument w/ Laughing Jack

looking at it now i should have just this as one of my big group posts but those take so so long to write and i cant be bothered so uhuhuh i hope you guys dont mind the multiple (Prompt) w/ (character) posts plus those are kind of my default posts between requests SOBS

this one is also interesting because i think jack can sometimes be a little immature and bad at compromise, so sometimes things can get a little.... erkrkrg.... on top of that, he doesnt take many things seriously so something can easily get more.. well heated because hes just cracking jokes most of the time

it wouldnt be until you actually start losing some level of control of your emotions to make him realize that youre being serious

leads to him unintentionally making you feel unheard and that hes not taking your feelings into consideration; which sometimes can genuinely be the case because as stated hes not the best with compromise, but.. i dont know

does reel back and try to apologize repeatedly to try to undo everything if theres tears, might fall into his pattern of trying to get you to smile and not leaving you alone until you do

which actually might make things worse because its a whole thing of "you just got done arguing and now hes trying to change the topic like it was nothing"

you will have to tell him to give you space, and you might have to repeat it a few times so he will actually. give you that space

tries to leave you mountains of candy as a peace offering

he sits and lets the guilt eat at him, he perhaps even fears that youre going to leave him like Isaac had, which makes him feel worse

he turns into the sad ant meme when that thought gets into his head/hj

probably slides you notes under your bedroom door to check in on you... he can enter your room easily via doing the smoke thing but he doesnt want to stress you out more.. his overthinking still gets to him enough to do the notes though

will literally do anything when you eventually exit your room, kind of accidentally ambushes you

immature and impulsive but hes willing to do better and follow boundaries because he doesnt want to lose you

[ardentpoop]

I dont mean this as a dig, but as a genuine question: why do you feel like the S9 finale "undid" Sams character development? Cause I think it was like, very in character. Sam spent S8 being guilttripped for not looking for Dean in Purgatory, gave up Amelia and the chance at a normal life once again. Then he spent the 2nd half of S8 doing the trials and dying, and blaming himself for "letting Dean down" and internalizing Deans words. Then Gadreel, and the guilt of "killing" Kevin– and then he did stand up to Dean, which was immediately followed by Dean spiraling out and their relationship being all over the place. And I mean, even when Sam stands up for himself, he still always ends up feeling guilty. So even when Sam says and believes "I wouldn't do the same, in the same circumstances", its something else entirely when something actually happens. Its easy to say and believe "I wouldnt/would do this" until it actually comes to it. Especially with it NOT being the same circumstances and Dean battering into him how "Sam not doing the same for him" was something Sam should feel bad for. He was gonna trade his soul for Dean to come back (not sure if S10 retracks on that, I only have up to S9 finale on my mind), which he tried to before in S4 even after they said they wouldn't do it again. In S8 he got hit with the "yeah, your agreement? thats a non agreement". And its one thing when your brother just suddenly goes invisible like with purgatory, and another when your brother dies in your arms and you actually have a body lying in his bed. I dont know, I just dont think its undoing anything. I think with everything Sam has been through, and everything Sam was manipulated into doing, and having his body and mind violated so so many times, especially now after the trials and Gadreel, and knowing he cant go back to Amelia, and knowing Dean and Kevin are dead, not just missing or whatever... I dont think it was bad or out of character writing. Sorry i hope my words are making sense, english isnt my first language and i know i get a little all over the place sometimes

hi! tbh you really don’t need to provide this much context for me next time as I’m always able to make sense of sam’s motivations no matter how the narrative is framing them. however your objection here is exactly what I’m talking about when I tell you guys the inconsistent writing confuses the audience. what I’m criticizing carver’s writing for in the s9 finale is not the idea that sam would resurrect dean to keep them together - that is so obviously in line with sam’s past behavior that it shouldn’t even be worth debating. are you aware that during samndean’s confrontation in “the purge” they were talking about two different things? sam was telling dean that he would never violate his autonomy the way dean did his by tricking him into letting gadreel into his body. dean was taking this as sam saying that he wouldn’t resurrect him from the dead period i.e. he loves dean less than dean loves him - a frankly very juvenile and frustrating POV that completely glosses over the heart of the issue, but that’s our dean lmfao. would be fun and great to work with if not for most of this audience taking dean’s perspective as fact and disregarding any ideas that deviate from it, which is how we always end up with fandom invalidating sam’s feelings sometimes even worse than dean does onscreen.

the s9 finale reducing this conversation and related conversations in the aftermath of the gadreel issue to “I thought you said you were okay with [me dying]” / “I lied” DOES do a massive disservice to sam’s character development earlier in the season by badly obfuscating his possession trauma and the horrific horrific betrayal of dean tricking sam into being possessed without his informed consent and then quite literally gaslighting him about it. this writing choice also ensures that dean doesn’t have to change a damn thing abt his behavior, as is always the case in this story. dean wriggled in the cold for a little bit post-gadreel, then while he was in this fucked up headspace he decided to take on the MOC of which one of its cute little side effects was possibly eventually making him murder sam (lol), then in the s9 finale he punched sam out so he could Nobly go off to fight metatron alone after sam generously entrusted him with the first blade, then he got to hear sam telling him Forget Everything I’ve Said All Season, It’s Fine That You’d Do This To Me Again, then he fuckin pathetically died in sam’s arms, then next season he wakes up as a demon and tries to kill sam with a hammer after rattling off a bunch of nonsense abt Who’s The Real Monster Here Sammy. Really Makes You Think.

like I’m sorry the conclusion to s9 IS a bunch of bullshit that dropped every satisfying thread of character development that the rest of the season had been semi-competently weaving together, and s10 is even worse - a complete mess in terms of storytelling. and again, this is me talking about the way that the events are framed and the narrative bias in dean’s favor. if we’re talking in-universe samndean characterization of course their motivations make sense to me these guys live inside my brain permanently.

[mbat]

it sucks when a youtuber who streams most of the time and then uploads cut down versions of their streams is like 'you couldve seen this whole thing had you actually been there btw. you should watch my streams actually' cause its like. not everyone can or wants to sit through live streams, especially ones that are either really long or theres so many people in the chat that youre basically just watching a video that you cant pause or skip forward or backwards on

like just upload the full vods and if people want to go to the streams they will, your advertising should just be you, you shouldnt need to be like 'you should feel bad or like you missed out because for any reason you missed the stream lol' like ? skill issue

cause the whole reason ive even checked out pretty much any live streamer was because i saw one of their vods and was like 'that seems fun, i would like to see more of these, and try to be there live if i can!' and like its not a 'im gonna miss out on everything if i dont see them live :[' thing yknow

ive mostly been referring to one youtuber this whole time that i used to watch cause i liked their videos but i unsubscribed mainly for this specific reason (because without fail theyd say this stuff in every video and it was beyond irritating) but i just know other people do it

also i know this probably comes out of left field but it also goes hand in hand with the 'only 20% of my viewers are subscribed!' thing (which that youtuber also did) and its like. bitch if i wanted to subscribe i would subscribe. they say 'you can always undo it later!' yeah or i could just not do it at all. shut up. that shit makes me want to subscribe even less. is it meant to be guilt trippy or something? 'look at the people who arent subscribing to me, it makes me sad :( please make my arbitrary number go up pleeassseee :(((('

im not gonna say this stuff feels manipulative because like, this is ultimately pretty unserious and is just annoying at most, but it rubs me the wrong way. like either youre good enough for people to want to see your streams or subscribe to you and you shouldnt need to worry about people not doing those things, or youre insecure despite already having THOUSANDS of people watching you and subscribing to you and your little arbitrary number not going up at breakneck pace is bothering you for some reason

i guess i cant say that people only do this for fun anymore since this, like everything, "has" to be monetized now, and i admit i dont know (or give a fuck) how that all works, but like. come on. just let the results speak for themselves and stop grating on the nerves of anyone watching because you cant just let your videos and streams be enough on their own

[lebenslangerschicksalsschat-z]

I think of you. Sometimes more times than the other.

I Dont remember being loved by you. I dont remember being close to you, or your heart. Ours wasnt a fairy tale, it was like a mixtape, with all my favourite songs. So it had to end someday like we did and so i hated the feeling of it ending. I wouldn’t mind starting it all over again and listen to my favourite lyrics a little more clearer than the last time, but im scared, scared that if i listen to it clearly enough I wouldn’t have anything else to listen to, that my interpretations of the lyrics would end someday, that i might just get stuck on an artist forever until he dies.

But so what if i have to, right? Atleast i will have you. But i cant see you anywhere right now. You talk about going back in time and undoing what you did but i have started forgetting what your voice sounded like. You show this remorse and guilt but i dont know if you still like the songs you told me you did. You told me you loved me but i cant see you running back to me. I cant see your beautiful eyes and your unhinged smile and your ability to make me feel alive even when im sick to my core. Your relentlessness towards me has gone decreasingly down to this pit i cant find my way out of. As if i saw depth in your cracks and you saw ignorance in my chasm.

You have this yearn to break free from expectations. A dynamic that is timeless. I saw us so similarly that i used to want to find answers in you that I couldn’t from myself. Maybe i was wrong. Maybe i was unaware of our contrasts, maybe it was city slicker falling for a small town soul, maybe it was a booknerd falling for the class clown. God how I wouldn’t mind doing it all over again. But we hit a snag, like all love stories, we left a mess of unspoken truths and so many lingering “what ifs” in the air. Like a pang of a connection left unexplored.

But oh how bittersweet. How bittersweet of you to let me go, how bittersweet of me to not come back, bitter because of me. Sweet because of you. I kept fearing about finishing this mixtape but now, our song itself remains unfinished.

I call this a testament to the spark we shared. A reminder that all the best love stories defy definition. A messy glory. A beautiful afterthought. I have started to believe that somethings are meant to be some, if not all. You were that some for me. So im okay that i think of you today, a little more than some other days.

[nyapologies]

4 11 18 22 31 43 f for scorpion. hi scorpion :3

under tha cut againnn

4. How easy is it to earn their trust?

WELL. He is extremely paranoid so it's not super easy. I think with the people he's close with he both trusts them more AND less. He wants to confide in them everything hes scared about, and at the same time he's terrified that they'll turn on him on a dime.

11. How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)?

It depends on the cause? I think he would just ask because he doesn't like being out of the loop of things. I think with some things he knows when to just smile and nod though (cough cough overlord cough cough)

18. What embarrasses them?

Everything <3 he feels really embarrassed about being like. so much more paranoid/jumpy after the timeloop and about everyone seeing his Whole Ass wrt his past and stuff. He's embarrassed about asking for help also but his fears overpower that embarrassment. He generally is also just easy to emasculate lmao

22. How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)? 

EXTREMELY possessive. If he's jealous it will be likely be obvious. He's jealous a lot in general, it just gets covered up by the more Visible emotions he has (like. fear.) and it manifests mainly by just being extremely clingy. People are allowed to leave him but also No They Arent

31.  Who are they the most glad to have met? 

Probably Overlord at this point honestly. He feels guilt and shame wrt the other Sinistar members because no matter how much he gets better he can't really undo all the horrible shit he was doing/has done to all of them. So there's always gonna be a gap there that he can't bring himself to cross, to get closer to any of them. But with Overlord he doesn't have that personal baggage and in a way he feels better about himself Because Overlord is kind of morally questionable. Because if Overlord can do questionable/bad things but still be overall a force of Good (at least in scorpions opinion) then maybe the same can apply to him.

43. If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so? 

HELP. WELL. I think he would still say he's straight and cis. I think he has the potential to become/realize he's bi but at the same time he kind of has bigger issues. insert that one tweet thats like i might be nonbinary but i cant worry abt that right now i have a job to do. Also Overlord could absolutely turn him bi if he wanted to.

F. What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)?

A lot of things. It's a lot more complicated now because of. Recent Events? I love him though and I want good things for him forever. I also want to torment him but dont worry about that

[eorziapple]

I want to know a bit of Apple's thoughts about the tribes of eorzea, the Amal'jaa, Ixal, Sahagin, Sylphs, Kobolds, and Goblins! And if you like, the tribes from other lands, such as the moogles, vath, vanu vanu, ananta, kojin, etc.

How does she feel about their treatment by the larger political structures, do any of them make her nervous, are there any in particular she wants to learn more of, and are there any she is extra happy to consider friends?

An interesting question, I suppose I can organize my thoughts by comparing my initial opinions on these peoples to how I feel about them now.

With regards to the Amal'jaa: Initially I considered them to be more of an obstacle than living people, having assumed they were thralls to Ifrit in totality, and the Primal being my first opportunity to investigate the research I had uncovered on summoning. It is difficult to fault the tactics of any peoples pressured by oppression and conflict, but I do not regret the conflict that was necessary in my initial confrontations with the Amal'jaa. They were making slaves of captives and their own people. Of course, having been brought in to learn of their culture, I again find myself swallowing the bitter pill of Ascian interference, how different it all could have been, how much history could have been different between us. That being said, I fear my lack of physical prowess has proven a bit of a detriment to connecting to individuals. I sometimes think they feel sorry for me?

With Regards to the Ixal: My dealings with the Ixal are few, but having plundered the mysteries of Azys Lla I can only sympathize with the Ixal, yet another victim of the Allagan's cruelty. Created an abandoned with little thought, having their own culture, beliefs, and ideas contending with the genetic programming for a purpose that was abandoned long ago.... I believe it will take generations to undo the damage that so many years of conflict have wrot. But the firswt steps are happening, and I have seen firsthand the wonderful dreams the Ixal can partake on their own. I hope to see them all take flight someday.

With Regards to the Kobolds: I dont think any Limsan worth their salt, from the Admiral herself to the lowliest deckhand, could think of our kobold neighbors and not feel deep regret and guilt for what we have done to them. Even before I began to take to the field, reading our history is stuffy classrooms, I was aghast at the cruelty of the Limsans, and looked at the reports of Titan's wrath upon settlers with an appreciation of the tragedy of it all, and how it could have been avoided. Upon meeting everyday Kobolds, I couldn't help but feel for them, so fearful of me, but so curious and energetic when the walls come down. I've made many friends amongs them now, I am happy to say, and they've helped me build some rather impressive artifices!

With Regards to the Sahagin: I find it difficult to regard the Sahagin with the same sympathies as the Kobolds, even knowing the sins of my forefathers in Norvrandt. My understanding is, initially, the Sahagin considered all non-Sahagins as well... essentially fish, and the initial encounters with the sea fairing peoples of Novrandt were particularly bloody as a result. Its going to take as much work from them as it will from us to strengthen this budding peace, and I expect there may be a few splits amongst the Sahagin themselves over it, with possibly many queens emerging with their own clutches and ideals.

Regarding the Sylphs: I cant imagine anyone having a hatred of the Sylphs, violence being almost entirely committed by the Tempered. I can, however, imagine being -frustrated- by the Sylphs, as I am quite frequently, having many of my belongings being pilfered or even -eaten-, even when I came to the area specifically to gather said belongings!

Regarding the Goblins: I love them, even as adversaries? They're just so clever and excitable. I dont think i've ever found a group that understands the joys of creation and experimentation as much as they do, and I found myself making fast friends with most goblins i've met.

[suntails]

upsetti on main

[mekatrio]

i get why the whole lifestream sequence w cloud and tifa was designed that way and that it suceeded in what it aimed to do, but a part of me kinda wishes there was a more realistic way that cloud reconciled with his trauma. what im trying to say is i wish there was a scene of cloud crying/expressing grief after recovering his true memories! i just wish he wasnt only shown as strong but living a lie/funky seizure breakdown time. like that part in gongaga after the temple of the ancients is one of my favorite moment of his, where he talks to himself, acknowledging that he dreads to find the truth about himself but being unsure why. its so realistic and humanizing. i guess him getting back on his feet immediately after being mako-poisoned could have happened offscreen but i still wish we were shown some of it... like omg clouds backstory is so sad can he please express grief like a normal human dbsjnfsjjd

[roseblings-moved]

i hope gem never gets unfrozen. i mean that entirely genuinely, i hope she never gets unfrozen and i hope she has to deal with the cold for the rest of her life and i hope scott learns to cope with the fact that he has hurt people but that doesnt mean hes a horrible person or has to shut himself away from the world. i hope their friendship is strained for a while and every time scott sees gem he feels a pang of guilt and gem spends most of her days in the nether

from what i can tell, scotts arc is currently about guilt and isolation. he feels as though he's hurt people, or is going to hurt people, so he shuts himself away out of guilt. and i (personally) dont want the takeaway to be that he hasnt hurt people. i want the takeaway to be that he has hurt people and thats... not okay, persay, but it is natural. and you have to live with that. and people can stay friends even when theyve hurt each other. that you cant undo the hurt that you've done, but you can try to be better in the future. etc. i dont know if this makes sense if i still agree with it in a bit then i'll clarify

[compassionatereminders]

i have to say as someone who lacks empathy, guilt and sometimes self awareness i do need to be told what i did wrong sometimes because i won't always just understand / read people's minds. this narrative that you have to know every single little detail of a wrong doing or else it's not "a real" apology is actually the reason i stopped trying to understand why it mattered and why i stopped caring about doing better, bc people wouldn't communicate with me, it was always "you should know better" and "you should already know" and sure this is a popular belief ("if i have to tell you what you did wrong you're not rly sorry") but some of us are completely different neurologically and our desire to do better does come with a need for more open communication and support

like some people get wired by trauma to not feel guilt or remorse and we're still trying to be good / do better and learn what is good and bad with our limited supply of understanding

now i struggle terribly to apologize to people bc i dont even know what i did wrong so I've turned that into over-apologizing even though i feel no guilt and don't know what im supposed to feel bad about, and im STILL treated like I'm stupid, and sometimes when i finally understand, for me making ammends is giving people something and trying to rebuild trust by learning how to do undo the bad behavior, and now that's "buying people over" like, christ. i cant win with people sometimes, just because i dont understand instantly and need an open conversation about it doesnt mean i dont care, it means im trying to understand because i lack a right or wrong axis

I read the ask I assume this is a response to as "my friend still doesn't understand DESPITE me trying to explain." I'm now realizing I might have jumped to conclusions though, so I wanna make it clear that I definitely agree that you should be willing to directly explain why you're upset before you expect people to fix it and change. I'm sorry if my previous answer implied otherwise!

[the-s1lly-corner]

Various crps x reader who has leg pain

Except its hyper specific to the admin and the pain is caused by staying still for too long and it gets worse with stress (as most things do)- something something excruciating leg pain that seems far worse than simply "feeling cramped from sitting for a few hours" and hits you even when youre asleep and it SUCKS!! i hate it!! i genuinely dont know if this is normal or not and im just overreacting but it hurts so so much and i hate it because i get have to get up every hour-ish

Characters: slenderman, laughing jack, nina the killer

Notes: reader is GN, not written with any condition or anything in mind, based off of admins experiences and his experience does not reflect all, admin uses all pronouns for nina, short post

CWs: edit, possible talk of horrible pain but yeah

Slenderman

Offers to take you out for a walk to help unwind your legs

i WAS going to say he offers to carry you but that defeats the purpose of getting up to work that pain out

sometimes it persists for longer, he offer to massage your legs with his tentacles- soft but firm and theyre warm so great for soothing any pains in my opinion!

very firm when trying to get you to take a break, will not take no for an answer...

he WILL interfere with your electronics if thats what youre using- though its not often because sometimes it can make it fizzle out when youre in the middle of something and you didnt save or cant save

Laughing Jack

Good news! Hes all over the place and begging for your attention, so it's likely you'll be on your feet a lot already!

yoinking this from ninas part but i do think he offers to dance with you just to get you on your feet

will swoop right in the second he notices you constantly shifting your legs around in your seat or when you start tapping your foot

feel bad for taking yourself away from your work even though its to undo some of the pain developing in your legs? jacks going to make a scenario where you need to come and help him- there! guilt eradicated for now! it'll likely be something as simple as needing help finding something!

gives you candy to try to help make you feel better, always keeps your favorite on hand

Nina the Killer

Offers to go on walks with you as well but I can also just as likely see them asking you to dance with them as they turn on some music... they're tooooootally smooth about asking you yeah totally

as a side note you both definitely make a playlist together! you also both make playlists for each other!

a lot of the music is fast and hyper, but if you dont want to dance to keep up with the beat she lets you know its okay to dance to your own tune

really just does anything to help you get on your feet if youre confined to an area for too long, makes sure you take breaks if you need to sit and work on something

master of self care when it comes to others, not so much when it comes to herself

[kinkforink]

What should I do if a guy I've been talking to constantly asks for things like audio or intimate pictures and when I say I'm not comfortable he'll say you said/did *this* and then I say I'm not comfortable with that specific thing and he says that itd make him feel really good and it takes like one more time of me saying I cant for him to drop it It's really hard for me to keep saying no to all these things because,, I cant really control when I'm like,, subby? Idk how to handle this and I'm sad

Oof, okay. Firstly, we’re very sorry you have to deal with that. That sounds extremely annoying. A lot of ppl don’t understand that just because you’ve done things with someone or said something via conversation doesn’t mean nudes aren’t a big deal or owed to that person. Even fucking someone in person, but naked with a chicken mask on, doesn’t mean they should be comfortable sending you nudes. Nudes leave you open to a different type of exposer and could pose one hell of a big risk once you send it. They have tangible evidence of your nudity. Something they can always look back at even if you were to cut them off in the future, something they can show around if they feel spiteful. If that idea scares you, DONT DO IT. You never know what someone could do with it and you can’t undo it once you hit send.

Secondly, you are not a bad sub for communicating your discomfort. Being a dom is not simply finding you someone who will comply to your every demand. No offense, but he’s ignorant for pulling the “oh but you’re freakier than that” card. Again, nudes are tangible. Youre suppose to meet a common ground with your sub, meaning your dom should not be heavily pressuring you to do things you have openly express disliking towards and guilt trip you into exposing yourself via photograph to “make him feel good”. Fuck that. If he were a good dom and a right pic then he’d know better than to ask more than a couple times after you’ve said no. There’s a different to testing boundaries but if he’s repeatedly asking this if you and making you feel incompetent for not changing your mind for him then ✂️ he needs to learn how to make you feel confident and important

[gayrhya]

i want to ask you more in detail questions but i dont actually know the general overview about your ocs? you mentioned a college werewolf/vampire thing? and like. who are the bonds? for more specific ig: how do they take their tea/coffee lol

OK SO

Bonds is the current title of the world ive been building focused on my two ocs Adriel & Arden. Its a modern magic with Angels, Demons, and Wizards. 

Arden is an exroyal who wants to become a cool wizard but she suck at normal elemental magic BUT she can shapeshift into any animal she wants which is basically unknown in their universe.

Adriel is a demon. He was one of the 4 demon generals of hell. did terrible things killed a lot of people etc, but feels guilt and remorse and disappears to the mortal world during modern times to live is life in peace and repent. He has a half demon daughter name Alteh, shes trans and i love her

The story starts when arden and adriel become bound in a freak accident and cant be more than 50 ft apart. they try to undo the binding, stop a celestial civil war, and stop ancient deities from stirring.

I come up with aus for the bonds world and character: most of my close friends have bonds ocs that exist in the world and may or may not be canon. i work mostly with @cryptid-addicted who is my best friend, alot of his characters are important to the plot and general cast of characters

the college vampire/werewolf au is like our guilty pleasure. All the characters are either: human, vampire, or werewolf and theyre in a college setting. for example: adriel is a vampire and a history professor. hes old and well over qualified for the job. arden is a human from a monster hunting family who gets bit from a werewolf and has been on the run for years. she finally thinks she free and enrolls at a local univeristy to take back the life she was never allowed to have in her early 20s. its just a fun au me and my best friend talk about

Arden drinks a lot of iced espresso drinks and adriel mostly drinks tea with cream & sugar

thanks for asking !!!

[3starjeneral]

Water Water, Everywhere

A little missing scene from "Descent" thats been in my brain for a while.

**************************

Of all the ways to go, this wasnt how he expected it to happen. He's survived so much pain, so much heartache, and what is going to get him in the end is something as simple as water. Cold water. Lots and lots of fucking cold water. What was it with them and the cold? First the ice cave, now this? He'd laugh if they werent so totally fucked. The doors had sealed to contain the breech, trapping them in this slowly filling coffin, and he could feel himself starting to panic. Feel the familiar tightening in his chest. Sam, he notices, is punching the control panel by the door, frantically entering sequence after sequence of codes, and that worries him even more than the ankle deep water. She is losing her cool, and that never happens. 

"I'm sorry, Sir. I can't bypass the system locally" she says, sounding defeated, and for the first time in a long time, afraid.

He nods at her and places a hand on her shoulder to ground her " "Deep breaths Carter. Dont panic just yet, ok, you with me?"

Knee deep.

"Yes sir" she replies, trying unsuccessfully to slow her breathing rate down to something resembling  normal. 

"Jacob?"

The water has risen rapidly and is now waist high on him, a little higher on Carter. 

"Jack, I'm going try to find a back door to the program."

"How long's that gonna take? I'm looking at some major shrinkage here."

He chances a tiny embarrassed grin at Carter, a coy head tilt and the corner of her lips twitch.

'Success' he thinks .The radio crackles and Jacobs voice fills the room again.  

"I don't know, this is kind of a unique situation. Give me a few minutes."

"Hey Carter, How long do you figure it'll take for this thing to fill up?"

"A few more minutes, Sir"

"Yep, ok heres what we're gonna do. We need to take these", he pulls at his tac vest and P90, "off. Take anything off that'll weight you down."

The water is now at chest height for him, chin for her. She is bobbing up and down in the water, leaning down to undo her leg holster, unclipping straps, tac vest and weapons dropping slowly through the water to the ground below with a soft 'thud'

"Next time we crash our brand new mothership, what do you say we do it in the tropics?" 

Stranded in the tropics with Carter wouldnt be the worst thing that could happen to him.

"Actually, Sir, it wouldn't make a difference. At this depth, all water is ice cold." 

He smiles, even in peril, she can't help stating the facts. "Shallower water, then…shallower."

"Yes, Sir. I'll keep that in mind" she says, nodding 

"Or we could just not crash at all. It would be nice to keep our nice new mothership more than a couple of hours"

"Yes, Sir."

He looks at her and feels a pang of guilt and regret. Guilt that hes never told her how he feels about her, because she deserves to know. Regret that he's never told her how important she is to him and taken the chance of being happy with her.

"Carter, Sam, if we don't make it out of this, just know that I've wanted to kick the door of that room down so many times..." he says through chattering teeth. 

"I know Sir, me too, more times than I care to admit" she replies.

They're floating in the water, their heads in the space between the water and the ceiling. 

Sam takes a deep breath as Jack shouts "Your dad's cutting it a little clo…" before they're both submerged fully in the water. 

They claw at the ceiling, punching it, trying frantically to escape but nothing happens. Nothing. He curses Jacob, curses him for being her dad, curses him for probably reminding her of the frat regs one too many times. For being the stubborn airforce General he is. For not being able to help them. Damn him. Then he curses himself for not having had the courage to speak to Jacob about his feelings for his daughter. Selmak would have mellowed him, he would have understood, offered the guidance he so desperately needed. Jack feels light headed. He thinks of Charlie, of his mom, his dad, his sister, all gone before him and wonders idly, though hes never been a religious man, if there is a heaven. He silently hopes there is, which surprises him, and that they'll be waiting for him, when this water claims him. The thought gives him a modicum of comfort.

Her hand brushes against his abdomen and his focus is pulled back to her, her hair floating angelically in the water, her eyes full of terror. 

In a split second, he knows what to do. He reaches for her, grabbing her hand and pulls her closer. He holds her face in his two hands and she graps his waist to keep them together. He leans into her and kisses her softly. 

If shes taken aback, she doesnt show it and her fingers dig into his waist a little tighter. 

His hands move to her cheeks and around their lips and he creates a vacuum, then breathes the last remaining air in his lungs into her mouth. Her eyes open suddenly when she realises what hes done her head shakes frantically and she wraps her arms around his neck and holds him close, foreheads leaning on each other, when he releases her face and nods slowly at her.

He figures, if hes going to die, that this is the best way to go, in the  arms of the woman he loves but cant have. They float motionless, staring at each other for what feels like minutes, but is, in reality, only several seconds. Bubbles rise from her mouth as she blows out the smallest amount of oxygen, both of them desperately fighting the urge to take a deep cleansing breath. She tries to lean into him, to replenish his lungs with what little she has left in hers, but he shakes his head stubbornly, and leans his torso back, out of her reach. They hear the muffled sound of Jacob saying "Sam..." and then his strangled "I'm sorry" and he knows there's no hope left. He pulls her close, places a kiss to her neck, holds her as tightly as he can, closes his eyes and as calmly as is possible, waits for the inevitable to happen.

But it doesnt. 

Instead, theres a loud bang when the doors suddenly start to open, and the water starts draining from the room. They release each other and gasp for air when the water dips below their faces. She starts to cough loudly and he holds her above the water level until her feet can touch the ground.

"Sir..." she begins.

"Lets just add that to the ever growing room, ok?" He says still half gasping for air, in between words, reaching under the water for his vest while she does the same. "Now is not the time for this conversation."

"Ok", she says, sounding little less sure than him. 

"Jack! Sam! Come in!" They hear Jacob shouting into the radio.

"Dad, this is Sam. We're okay!"

"Thank God, Sam, you really had me worried "

"Tell him I take back everything I was thinking when I was underwater." Jack says. 

But not what I did, he thinks...

Never what I did.