#but theres only a few i feel strongly abt

[tiredrobin]

ok my lil nightmare headcanons for the guys that i like. six is the most fleshed out and runaway kid is here because i have little aus in my head and i think about all of them . just not as much as i think about six

the most widely applied hc for all of them: the all of them have ptsd but most of the symptoms one might expect for ptsd dont rly express themselves because theyre all basically in survival mode Always, and for symptoms of ptsd to properly express the brain has to be like "oh, right, i'm safe. time to explode" (this is very simplified and im aware theres way more complexity and nuance. just assume literally every hc i present abt anything is more nuanced than this list offers)

six

autism

adhd also

she's (mostly, circumstantially) selectively mute and/or minimally verbal, and my supporting evidence is i want her to be. my second supporting evidence is that she doesn't talk in any of the comics and she doesn't even have a whispered voiceline like "hey!" like mono does. my third supporting evidence is that that i want her to be. in more depth, she CAN be verbal, but it is (as mentioned) circumstantial and related to who she's with and how safe she feels. ie: the door raft is safe enough that she manages to tell mono her name, and in a few situations following she manages to communicate verbally, it's just not something she can do easily in… well, most cases. she's otherwise strongly communicative when she needs to be, and good at getting her point across when necessary

always whispers when she does speak

this is less a hc and more something actively supported by canon, but she WILL help people if it doesn't put her in immediate danger (and even if it does, in some cases) (supporting evidence is ln2 and vln lmao)

gets anxious when people behave vulnerable around her/quick to emotionally shut down/retreat. low empathy, high compassion. (if u think negatively abt this bite me forever and ever and ever cuz ur wrong. this is a completely neutral trait)

even after the tower, she obviously finds comfort and joy in music boxes and music in general (also mostly supported by canon content, i think)

likes to hum when she's alone

struggles with skin-picking

the noisiest she gets is when she's dreaming

physical contact is weird for her, aka it's fine if she expects it and painful/awful if she doesn't (weird exceptions apply to some degree, ie hands are ok/mono taking her hand is almost always fine)

she only hates veggies because no one's ever cooked 'em good for her. girl needs some stir fry

gets cold way easily

mono

autism 2 electric boogaloo

it's just different from six's autism, man, idk

he scripts a lot. on the spot, he has a hard time putting sentences together, but give him a little bit/be patient and he'll manage fine. he's definitely not nonverbal (six is of the opinion that he doesn't know how to shut up, which is a bit of an exaggeration but one that mono doesn't mind), it's just that autism and trauma makes words Hard

so like not nonverbal and not fully speaking but a secret third thing

survivor's guilt in, like, every situation ever

very good at taking the lead when he has a goal and has a hard time stopping to listen to others

but he DOES make a concerted effort to listen to others because he's at least peripherally aware of this fault of his

world's softest speaking voice. it's about as soft as how he whisper-talks the word "hey", pretty much

extremely detail-oriented, which helps a lot when solving puzzle-y situations

yellow is his favorite color

runaway kid:

also autism

i don't have much for them uhhh

they/them-er. they're not picky tho

goes by runa or una. "una" was a joke at first, but it sounds a bit like "uno" and the number theme with the other two just really is too hard for me to resist

will instigate contact but dislikes reciprocation

probably the loudest speaking voice of the three, but that's not really saying much. reflex is to speak lowly or whisper

ok with words. doesn't need to script

probably struggles a lot with touch-focused sensory stuff

[animalinvestigator]

hi ^o^ i wanted to ask, is adventure + 02 good? i watched tamers bc your posts abt it were interesting and i really really loved it

hello lina!! ^O^ i can only really speak from my opinion, but i guess my answer for that is "depends?"

you can probably tell pretty immediatley that i really enjoyed 02 and its a direct sequel to adventure so reccomending it kind of comes with the caveat of like. watchadventure too. but i feel pretty iffy about reccomending the whole circuit to someone coming from tamers because adventure itself (as in the first series) is diametrically opposite from tamers in its pacing and priorities and sensibilities in pretty much every way. it's definitely for the most part a saturday afternoon cartoon monster of the week type show in the purest sense .the heavy character focus from tamers isnt there and there really isnt much of a cohesive narrative throughline. which isnt to say i didnt enjoy it , i did!!!!! its a fun show with a fun cast, but i wouldnt say, "if you liked tamers you have to watch this!!" actually i think coming from tamers without knowing what you're getting into would really set you up for being disappointed...

i think 02 is much more of a sister show to tamers than it is to adventure, it shares the heavy character + group dynamic focus that tamers has + the same "3 arc unfolding narrative" structure too (and a lot of thematic similarities but thats a long winded post for another day). so if you liked tamers i would say you'd get something out of 02. IMO its not as GOOD as tamers. but it is similar. but the issue is theres enough of 02 thats contingent on watching adventure first (the entire cast from the first season are recurring side characters and two of the main protagonists are also carryovers from adventure) that you'd probably be in the dark about quite a few things without that context ..so its a puzzle. if you liked tamers you will probably like 02 though. its just a matter of like. Is it worth it to you to watch adventure as well.

to make a long post short: Adventure is really just a 55 episode fun romp without much substance, so if you're good with that , by all means i reccomend it!! but just know it is definitely not the same as what you're coming from. you probably need at least wikipedia article summary knowledge of the plot beats in adventure to watch 02, but 02 is a lot closer tonally to tamers and i'm more apt to reccomend it to people. (WATCH THE SUB or at least some other language dub thats not based on the english one though because i've been strongly cautioned against the english dub for 02 specifically.)

hope this helps ^O^

[alienaiver]

Hi Nohr, I hope I'm not being rude for asking but I read you have ARFID? What is it like for you? I think I may have it but Im afraid of 'self diagnosing' and being judged 😖

hiii sweetheart! ✨ youre not being rude at all, im very open about my issues and stuff, so ill be happy to talk to u about it !! (if u also wanna rant or open up abt ur situation more privately u can go off anon (if ur comfortable) and ill reply privately or thru dm's <3)

and yep, ive had arfid my entire life. its been different things that have been safe foods at different periods of my life !!

im putting the rest under a read more bcos i go into detail of my current restricted diet and stuff, so if that triggers anyone, they wont be forced to see it !! its also just a bit long lmao

rn its Very bad and the only things i can get thru my mouth is crushed corn flakes, gummy bears, a specific ice cream and on/off cucumbers. like ive eaten nothing else since sunday and very little of either. anything else i try makes me gag, nauseous or can even give me meltdowns if forced to eat. im dizzy all the time rn and very frustrated about it 🙂‍↕️ its also sooo embarrassing because like ??? my dude those safe foods are literally candy? and im afraid i seem like i just do it to eat candy but its not and i feel so ashamed 😭

i AM hungry tho; i feel the hunger and the low blood sugar, so i try to eat, get clammy and/or triggered and then thats that. cant try again until ive regulated back to a calm state of mind and feel ready to try again.

i also react strongly to my roomie's food/the smell. i have to go into another room if they eat anything with a strong scent, or sit in the opposite end of the living room. luckily, theyre VERY understanding of it so they dont get offended!!!

as i said im going thru a kind of extreme phase right now, but in my usual day-to-day life theres still tons of food i can eat. when im stressed, have my period, big decisions or other life crisis my food selection instantly limits themselves.

but like normally i have at least 10-12 different safe food meals, besides my 2-3 comfort foods and am usually more willing to try new stuff and comfortable exploring new things.

my current arfid flare-up started during early summer where i started repeating the same three meals (like last year when i lived off of onigiri and ramen) ill go to great lengths to prepare and make the food that is safe but as soon as its unsafe, i dont go thru the trouble anymore; thats usually my first warning sign. i repeat few meals and feel safe eating less and less varieties.

for me its not about calories or weight restrictions; its 100% sensory input. im not afraid of having adverse reactions like allergies, i just physically LOATHE the food in my mouth, it grows as i chew it and it instantly triggers my gag reflex.

theres little else to do about it but go thru it as best as i am able, drink lots of water and then supplement with shakes of fruit and protein powder. usually my arfid is a symptom of distress, which means i have to fix the underlying issue before it goes back to normal.

you should never fear self-diagnosing in any capacity, because the only thing an 'official' diagnosis is important for is a) treatment accessibility and b) inner understanding and comfort in knowing youre not alone. in a lot of countries, assessments like these cost so much with no insurance, so theres no shame in learning and figuring out yourself.

even if you end up not 'qualifying' for an arfid diagnosis, it does nOT take away your issues around food or the validity in your search for solutions !!!!

i wish no one would get judged for any 'quirky' eating habits but i think its something - depending on what youre able to eat - you may need to face daily or weekly. i have a very understanding circle of people around me, and ive been struggling with eating since i was a kid, so many people in my circle are also just. used to it. they worry and in the past theyve tried to force me to eat by taking me to restaurants that didnt have my safe foods to entice me to eat differently which is ALWAYS humiliating (they dont do it anymore). theyve since learned that taking it into consideration is way easier for everyone, and will make for a more positive experience if they want me included in the eating part of anything social.

a way to handle it is to practice how to respond to judgy comments, and figuring out what you want to get out of those. are you interested in educating them about arfid and why it is hard for you? maybe learn and remember some facts or offer some sources to send that they can read, and that youre happy to explain your experiences (if you are). maybe youre just looking to appease the situation and make your eating a non-topic? then shut it down 'nicely' with a smile and a laugh like 'yea, i definitelt am picky ahaha'. it can feel a bit like shooting yourself down choosing that road, but if its people u know you dont want to have the discussion with/will make it uncomfortable or youre just not that interested in opening up to them, you can shut it down like that. for me, practicing a few formulated replies in case anyone comments on it, have made it way less anxiety inducing for me to join in social gatherings and feel less blindsided !! (and if i have to go out to eat somewhere new i check the menu online beforehand!)

my twin has pretty hardcore arfid too and when we were kids, a little worse than me, so in some aspects ive never really been alone with my issues or felt completely ashamed because she was going through the same thing, which in my case, was lucky. i wasnt the odd one out or the weird kid (we were the weird twins tho lmao but we had each other !!!) but im sure finding community in facebook groups or even here (with me or others) can also really help on the shame around being so picky. let me know if you have any more questions or wanna talk about ur experiences, im genuinely genuinely always up for a chat and here for anyone who needs it !!! 🥰🧡

[just-a-little-silly]

PLEASE I completely get it!! I’m like that w/ a few of my ocs- especially their relationships w/ canon characters. I may or may not have a bad habit of ignoring the plot holes I sometimes create😅💀

Lmaoo Aidma coming after Zeus for the teasing real real- also abt Caesar, Zett and Viggo, I completely get that too. Don’t get me wrong I love Zejal they are my everything but there are times when I wish I could focus more on other character’s relationships (but who am I kidding Zejal has my entire soul and I’m quite happy w/ that)

I would definitely love to hear more about Aidma and her father- the idea of her being a clone of her father is amazing I’d love to see it fully developed and I’d also like to know abt the ideas you currently have for it as I’m pretty curious even if they’re not fully cemented or anything (ofc only if you’d be down to share that is).

I also have a few random questions I thought to ask bc they suddenly popped up if you don’t mind. What is Aidma’s greatest fear? Something she’s incredibly proud of? Her greatest regret?

I’d imagine that seeing Aidma get so severely messed up mentally and physically because of the battle with her father would be hard for Najlynn to witness, I wonder what her reaction to it all was? How did Najlynn feel about heading back when Aidma decides to take the clan and return, especially without telling anyone? Also since Najlynn is in the night class what’s her relationship with Hiro, Zeus, Lucious, Clive, Viggo, Gray and everyone else like? Also I’m not sure if you ever mentioned her year or age (sorry if I forgot) also what significant connections has she made in Gedonelune and how does she feel about leaving them?

Aww Zeus and Aidma, they sound amazing. You mentioned earlier that you could tell me a million things about that happened in their relationship :>…I wish to know many of these things (literally give me anything and i’ll absolutely eat it up).

As for morals theres so much- I’m still playing around with a lot of things. I might hold off on answering this fully just because I want to make sure I phrase it right also it might switch up 😅 I’ll get back to you w/ more on that for sure tho!! I can tell you a little more about their personalities/ symbolisms tho if you’d be interested :DD (Kajal’s symbolisms rly tie into her morals rn too so) Relating to this I have written down that Safiya believes strongly in honesty and integrity. Kajal, at the end of the day, is a very protective person and really believes in the idea of things coming full circle and that one should rly keep in mind the consequences of their actions. She also rly values loyalty. She thinks it’s just for her to go after those who cause the people she cares about pain and doesn’t hesitate to make people pay a steep price for crossing her or her loved ones. Again, still working on stuff- (I’ll have to think more about Lynn and Abena :3 tho Lynn and Kaju are very similar).

Ohh boy. Kajal and Zeus’s history is A LOT. Apologies in advance if this is a bit long…(also I too can’t say they’re healthy all the time😅)

Soo the ups are that Zeus and Kajal reallyyyy trust one another. They’d learned to communicate pretty well. They are each other’s comfort and safe space. With Zeus, Kajal feels that she can be vulnerable and he feels the same with her. They challenge each other to do and be better while simultaneously trying their hardest to support one another when things get rough. The downs are mainly dealing with the moments where one of them is struggling. While I said they both feel comfortable being vulnerable there are times when they’ll both try to deal with a lot individually instead of leaning on their partner for support and it seeps into their relationship bc the one going through stuff will try not to address it in worry that they’d be a bother or that it’s not as serious compared to the other issues around them. They ofc get through it but it can be a little clunky.

—

Also you didn’t rly ask abt this next bit so feel free to skip it if u feel like I just felt like offering you some Zejal context TT:

Soo an idea I had for them was that Kajal and Zeus get together wayyy before the events of his route. I have it written down that Klaus, who happens to trust her, gives her the broach- not Liz. So…essentially, he steals the broach from Kajal and when his plan is revealed to the group (and Kaju)- She is evidently very shocked/hurt (she’s more so hurt that he went behind her back instead of talking to her about it as they’d always done thus far). After that whole thing she looses a significant amount of trust in him, so much so that she proposes they take a break from the relationship all together. Btw another reason the whole thing (like loosing trust) shook her so badly was that Kajal had told Zeus her real name. Since Kajal is fae I took a fun fact I found abt fae (the fact that if you know a fae’s real name you have control over them) and sort of applied it to her. Basically, since he knows her real name…if used properly with the right spells (that he is certainly smart enough to figure out)- he’d have a certain amt of control over her. Her telling him her real name was one of the hardest things she’d ever done- smthn that took a lot of trust…and then this happened. Anyways. Zeus ends up understanding she needs her time/space and lets her go- they do get back together ofc after…an incident… and they learn once more to trust in each other and with time eventually develop an even stronger bond.

—

Okay back on track😂😅 Kajal once used Kannu’s ability bc she was insanely bored in class and wished to be somewhere else only find and end up listening/watching a group of girls shit talk Lynn- she did not let it slide. Kajal essentially uses Kannu’s ability to gather information that she can’t get to herself or information that people wouldn’t be willing to give her directly if that makes sense. Kannu is very good at slinking around unnoticed so it works out great. Also ur actually spot on bc Kannu actually does manage to share the spell w/ Zeus at one point👀…for Kannu and Piggy Caesar beef…in all honesty I just thought it’d be kinda funny-

I’d like to say that Kannu became attached to Zeus quite quickly bc she first off knew he’s a good guy and could immediately pick up on how much he loves Kajal. She knew right away that Zeus cared so genuinely for her- even during the events of his route when he steals the broach from her, he still loves her- it’s something that never goes away. Seeing how devoted he is to her, Kannu rly starts to appreciate him. I have it written down in my notes that apparently Khol didn’t like him bc the first time they met Khol stole Zeus’s necklace and Zeus didn’t let him keep it.

At the risk of making this whole thing longer than it is…I might change Lynn’s familiar to a brown bear- just bc one suits her personality better😅 as for Scarlett and Lynn…they rly just clashed horribly. Even during their (very short) relationship- things were always a little tense. I’ll have to get back to you on it- I haven’t developed their actual relationship as much as I have worked out the current hatred they feel for one another😭😭😭

notes on safiya (one of my WH / multifandom oc)!!

anywaysss im answering a few questions i got from @eye-cri (eeeee bc im so happy to :3)

okie so yes!! safiya is a prefect (she becomes one around the same time as liz (so, after rem) when her friends convince her to try for it. honestly, she kinda is like joel TT. safiya is so fun bc she says whats on her mind and will sometimes manage to do it in the most unbelievably tactless way possible but shes rarely ever intending to be flat out rude. like she just says things sometimes, its great. she, like liz, got an acceptance letter, started off as a provisional student and then got her place at the academy (she and liz pretty much have the same starting tbh, they’re both from villages tho safiya’s family is still very much alive). also she’s pretty good friends with joel, luca, amelia, scarlett and augustus- she and liz get along but they tend to argue from time to time.

also about the boots omg what was i thinking looking back at it, it rly is smthn but honestly its so very safiya in a way i can’t fully articulate rn TT

additionally, i’ve decided i may ship her w/ elias :DD idk just think that’d be a cute pairing-

(also note: some of my oc lore does change from time to time depending on the characters and whatnot tbh but usually it doesnt- unless i forget stuff HELP-💀)

[pktrozei]

if ur still doing the ask game.. 🏳️‍🌈 ur favorite hades character(s) 😁 if ur not doin it then u can ignore me LMFAO

i only did zag bc.. ALL OF THEIR OUTFITS R SO COMPLEX

[oliviamillss]

reading dreams chart

im only going to use up to orb 3, for stronger accuracy lmao

**if you can’t be bothered to read it all, theres a summary paragraph at the bottom**

sun:

sun in 7th: strong emphasis on relationships. tends to copy others lingo/habits. extroverted. probably ‘needs’ others. only really shows his true self around his close friends/family/partners. 

sun at 19 degrees: a libra degree. (emphasis on this bc libra rules 7h), makes him a very charming, likeable, particularly popular guy.

sun opposite ascendant: inner conflict, probably doesn’t feel like people see him for his true self, may struggle showing true self. may feel misunderstood. may need approval/validation a lot.

sun square mars: hints to daddy issues. may struggle with a lot of built up anger and frustration, but it seems like he takes it out very positively, as you can see he is competitive, so i think he lets it out through gaming. probably very energetic, motivated.

sun square saturn: high expectations for himself. probably the type of person to think ‘i’m only good enough if i do this’. probably very hard on himself. also probably very insecure of himself, but doesn’t show it. another sun square masculine planet, more hinting to daddy issues.

moon:

moon in 7th: probably relies on close friends/family/partners a lot. loves to help people, esp people he’s close with (kinda mr beast vibes). probably very like ‘oh shit, he’s sad, i need to do everything within my power to cheer him up’ if that makes sense lmao

moon in virgo: looking after people!!! esp with the sun square saturn,, high expectations. probably a very much perfectionist, which also explains why he is competitive. may ‘always need to be right’. but virgo moons are actually so lovely omfg

moon at 9 degrees: sagittarius degree, likes to help people by optimism, and giving things to the person that they would want (im aware that sounds obvious lmao). probably feels a sense of achievement when cheers them up.

moon square pluto: probably hard time dealing with and growing from negative things that have happened, possibly struggles with letting things go. possibly self destructive (why did that one heatwaves part come to mind), possible trust issues + anxiety, probably very particular about who he lets close into his life, maybe quite protective. 

mercury:

mercury in 6th: likes to help people, probably not disappointed if he spends his time working with someone, may struggle with anxiety/depression. a quick learner, probably overthink every word because it wast the ‘perfect’ thing to say. 

mercury in leo: funny asf, and out there, also thinks his ideas/things to respond and say are the best, with the 6h and 7h placements, he is open to listen to others, but in the end he only really wants his one lmfao, good with conversation.

mercury at 1 degree: aries degree, another fire placement which emphasises the loud, out there kinda vibes.

mercury trine mc: career and reputation are strongly linked with what he says. (this is obv bc hes famous lmao). he’s smart, particularly with technology and its linked to his career. *im aware this sounds like im just describing him, this is exact so thats why its overly accurate*

mercury opposite neptune: daydreamer, probably has a lot of thoughts and ideas in his head, but they just dont come across right. probably zones out, may struggle with focusing. but very creative, has big and creative ideas. i havent mentioned it before but its come up too many times now, but he has a lot of placements, when manifested badly, creates a good manipulator

mercury square jupiter: optimistic, possibly thinks his ideas are the best (we’ve covered that before), can be really overly talkative or just nothing at all. (i rlly dont know much about this placement)

venus:

venus in 7th: he will have a beautiful relationship with his future partner. charming asfff, probably a good flirt. tends to love love. needs to be liked, sort of a pleaser. 

venus in virgo: the type of person to remember everything about the people he cares about. loves to help the people he cares about. probably sees the people he truly loves as ‘perfect’, which may end up being really bad if they’re toxic. 

venus in retrograde: struggles feeling loved, possibly feels like he doesn’t deserve love. probably the type to be like ‘how could you ever love me?’

venus square mc: attract people who take care of him. either has self-esteem issues, or is quite a dependant person. creative. may struggle finding people who support his career, or may have to change a few things about himself to be liked by others. 

venus trine jupiter: very likeable, and he’s veryyy lucky. he’s funny, and a generous person, probably very giving to his close friends and family. charismatic asfff, likely he will marry someone foreign. 

mars:

mars in 9th: more things hinting to attract(ing/ed to) foreigners. loves experiencing things with people he cares about. likes to learn more and more, possibly stubborn, makes sure his opinions are known.

mars in scorpio: that boy needs privacy in his life, doesn’t like being predictable. probably an overthinker. we’ve already known this but he’s definitely a top. probably could get anyone he wants, seductive asfff. also pretty spiteful.

mars at 17 degrees: leo degree, fame bitchesss

mars square ascendant: hates to lose, competitive. people may be intimidated by him at first, can’t really hide anger, pretty stubborn.

mars opposite saturn: really hard on himself. wants to be the best of the best, leader. stands up for himself. another placement hinting to daddy issues. harsh about his work, and himself in general, perfectionist. 

mars square uranus: anger may change a lot, a lot of energy, probably struggles to focus, doesn’t like to be the one who is being controlled/has restrictions. probably struggles with authority. outbursts of anger.

jupiter

jupiter in 3rd house: loves writing, and is actually pretty good at it. knows how to talk to people, how to persuade them, and how to manipulate them. good liar, knows how to sell his wants across, how to get what he wants.

jupiter at 4 degrees: cancer degree, cancer rules his 6h. he uses his luck/money to help others.

jupiter square neptune: big dreams, desire to escape the world as it is.

saturn:

saturn in 3rd: afraid of/ is often misunderstood. struggles to open up?, maybe he wasn’t listened to much growing up. hard on himself academically, feels like he isn’t smart enough. hard time expressing himself. maybe feels like noone really cares for what he has to say?

saturn at 16 degrees: cancer degree. idk what else to say abt it lmaoo

saturn square ascendant: quite serious, maybe struggle with the way he looks? possibly quite overwhelmed about his life,, feels like he has too much to do at times. fear of rejectionnn

saturn square uranus: maybe he doesn’t like change, tradition v change clashing. authority troubles. probably needs freedom, but feels unstable without what he’s used to. rebelling against norms. 

uranus: 

uranus in 12th: probably very curious about unexplainable things, maybe quite into conspiracy theories. two complete ends of the spectrum: fear change/need it, unpredictable things happen/ everythings the same. 

uranus at 14 degrees: taurus. taurus ruling 2nd, i guess it shows change in dream’s wealth.

uranus opposite north node (and conj south node): with exceptions, doesn’t like conflict. he is fine with joke conflict, but the second there’s an actual argument he tries to be the ‘peacemaker’ guy. technology is major in his life. also quite nervous about his career/future. 

neptune:

neptune in 12th: awful sleep schedule. overworking himself, never relaxing. vivid dreams. once again, this has come up loads and i just haven’t mentioned it: intuitive asf, george is the same. whether either are aware of it or not, they are super intuitive.

neptune at 2 degrees: taurus degree.

neptune sextile mc: creative, also likes helping others, empathy to the public. has big dreams career wise. 

pluto:

pluto in 10th: determined person, gets a lot of hate, but also a lot of love. trust issues, persuasion/manipulative abilities. leader leader leader. another hint to daddy issues, maybe privacy invading, maybe overprotective. don’t want to be controlled.

north node:

north node in 6th: overwork himself. but i think we can interpret this as his life goal to be working to help people. literally mr beast. just work hard, and give a lot away. humble.

chiron:

chiron in 9th: possible restriction from either his or his communities beliefs/religions. maybe he’s afraid of leaving where he is right now (sapnap moving to orlando, whenever its brought up its always george coming to orlando)

lilith:

lilith in sagittarius: need for truth. dislikes restrictions. hides emotions, uses humour to avoid them/ make people think they’re okay when they’re not. stubborn asf. 

lilith in 10th: tend to be sexualised/ reputations for being sexual. another placement hinting to daddy issues. really wants to be at the top, the most powerful. likes using his dominance/ power to seduce. motivateddd.

lilith conjunct pluto (exact omfg): typical ‘mystery’ guy. probably the mystery/scorpio vibes he pulls off attracts/ seduces people. the most dominant partner ever. sex is probably so intense and overwhelming

moon square lilith: possible mummy issues. his need for sex can change quick asf, from one end of the scale to another. struggles to open up. 

 i ought to mention!!

there’s a theory that the degree of your venus sign is the birthday of someone who is v important in your life. what’s dreams you may ask? 1. and when are george and sapnap’s birthdays? the 1st. they’re soulmates, your honour.

summary!!!

basically, dream has so much care and love for his friends and family, and probably relies on them a lot. he only shows his true self around them, and he (at least thinks) people don’t really understand him in the way his friends and family do. he is a social person, who’s very likeable and charming. he lovesss helping people, doing everything in his power to cheer others up, he remembers details about the people he loves. he is such a perfectionist, needing to succeed and win and everything, and is very competitive. he probably doesn’t think he’s ‘worthy’ if he’s bad at something. he sets very high expectations for himself. he is very hard on himself. if he wants to, he knows how to manipulate people. he has so so many placements for an amazing manipulator. he may struggle to express himself or open up, and may be hard on himself academically. maybe he doesn’t feel ‘listened to’. a lot of emotions like anger and sex drive may change rapidly for him. he over works himself a lot. a major theme in his life is tradition vs change. he is probably afraid of change, or finds it uncomfortable, or he may have some sort of attachment to traditional values/things, no matter how much he wants to change. he is also a peacemaker. he was born to be loved or hated, kinda like marmite but if the balance was more equal. he doesn’t like restrictions. he uses humour to hide his emotions.

im also thinking of doing a synastry reading between george and dream but idk yet lol

hope you guys enjoyed, this took ages lmao<3

[transrightsjimin]

covid rants as per usual

had 4 teams meetings today nd slept too few nd i did alright at work but im rly overwhelmed frm the social interaction nd a colleague suggested we go out to somewhere outside w colleagues, to like a picnic or smth bc most of us rarely saw each other irl nd the rest was super enthused nd i just sat there like :S

nd afterwards i tried to finally, finally, like fcking 2 years too late but finally setting up a word document to go drop all these articles and useful websites nd posts in, to debunk eugenics sht and provide helpful websites, resources, accounts etc for those who do want to actually end covid and be able to go to safer places or get vaccines tht might otherwise be thrown away etc.

long sentence but urgh anyway i searched for omikron to check if it's spelled w a K in dutch and the search results were ONLY articles in major news website articles in dutch that celebrate how omicron is 'milder' and defenses of stuff opening up even while infection rates r terribly high and rising and i just felt sick to my stomach already from an NOS article tht claimed we should go for a 'controlled spread' approach for 'natural immunity' as if that wasnt already explicitly stated to be the policy since 2020, and also this child pedetrician / dutch CDC (OMT) member Patricia Bruijning who shared in a dutch talk show she wouldn't vaccinate her kids if she had them etc.

just god i tried to keep working on the word file but the first good article i wanted ti add is inaccessible outside the US nd i got too tired sifting(?) thriugh bookmarks on twt bd just only have the titles for what i wanted to have in the word doc i wanted to base my carrd on. im just mad i started this so late and everything stresses me out nd nothing can relax or distract me

maybe i shiuld rly draw out my feelings but idt i should rn bc i just get even more fristrrated thinking about it urghghg

im just tired of this eugenics bs and so scared of getting infected and for losing loved ones to the virus and every day i dont finish this carrd is another day a person didnt read or share it nd risks their health nd life more. and im just so so fking sick of the gaslighting, being told by others both on individual nd societal level tht i'm exaggerating nd ir's not that bad and that i'm too extremist and 'we don't know if masks work' and i need to consider other people's perspective as if that isn't shoved down our throats by the state nd literally the majority, and that it's not an issue if people die abd that theres no risk for kids and that we're safe and covid is over or over soon and and go along w the givt and media and crowd bc 'polderen' and 'acting normal' nd just the cultural, educatiobal, medical field etc that dont give a fck about face masks nd any other measures bc ppl dont knpw covid spreads via aerosoles nd otherwise dont care

also just remembered my manager / boss in a meeting complained a lot abt how a student in some survey filled in they think the non-EER student tuition fee (abt €11K / year i think) is too high nd didn't make sense w the 'inclusion and diversity' message of the uni. which yeah they're absolutely right abt lol

nd he was furious nd was concerned that this one student would harm the reputation of the school and disagreed strongly bc tuition fees for those groups might get even larger bc the university (supposedly) has too few funds nd needs more bc the student loan system will be stopped etc and him nd colleagues were poking fun at our faculty head(? i think) who complained 'this is a school but this sounds like a business!' (not in the call) nd manager nd colleagues were like 'of course it's a business' nd manager/boss used a weird analogy for why the complaint made no sense nd he said this is why they need to tackle the issue w the marketing team nd use data to determine more where to gather international students from bc those graduates result in larger funds for universities. just. christ. like i somewhat enjoy my job but the school is so corporate i dont know what to say nd again just that whole. polderen sht which basically just means 'go along w the status quo or shut up'

[gwemrys]

I love your Merlin & Gwen content! I was wondering if you had thoughts on if an earlier magic reveal had happened for them (I personally like to headcanon the perfect timing for that would have been the Lamia episode) and what you would’ve wanted out of it.

omg..... I DO HAVE THOUGHTS ON THAT.. MANY OF THEM 💖.......(shit this turned into an essay abt their soulmate bond first fbdnfj i promise i will get to the point somewhere in there LMAO.) passionate monologue in 3 2 1

LETS GO so from the moment gwen first saw merlin she has been ....strongly Intrigued by his strangeness. it was like WHAT a weirdo but i like it...... she saw him and immediately felt the burning desire to be connected to him in some way shape or form .. friendship? romance? WHATEVER JUST KEEP HIM! she was used to lunatics bc she lived in camelot but with this lunatic it was like. it was like ‘ive consistently had no clue what the fuck he is on about but his soul feels familiar and warm and safe and also he is crazy. and he radiates something unique and it feels connected to his strangeness but i cant seem to understand what it is? and it feels like the only thing that matters right now is to keep him close to me?’

so she does. shes there for him when he needs her and hes there for her when she needs him (she almost feels like he has helped her without telling her? as if a lot goes on that he doesnt talk about...)

as time goes on more n more impossible things happen when merlin is around and stories dont seem to add up at all..... she gets so used to merlin being Different that it doesnt rly occupy her mind, she kind of brushes it off bc yeah merlin is merlin :) but it remains in her subconscious and there are times when it resurfaces.

lamia is one of the episodes where i think she first realised that this “being different” of merlin was.... not as trivial as she had made it to be in her mind..

(but thinking of possible explanations scared her bc it Could mean that merlin had rly been forced to live with being in deathly peril every second of his life and on top of that having to keep it secret.. so she didnt ask for more answers and instinctively just pushed the idea to her subconscious before she could rly consider it)

fast forward to sword in the stone pt2. gwen is about to fatally lose her one-on-one battle with morgana when morgana flies back and the corridor proceeds to explode, both things for.... NO reason. it has to be. magic....?

which shouldve frightened her bc she is standing in the same corridor and there is no way to know if she is in danger too but before she has the chance to feel scared she hears a familiar voice say ‘you alright?’

and that. is when it clicked.

her shock wasnt due to the mere fact that merlin, her best friend, had magic. she was shocked because she had known.... and denied it to herself.. but she had always known in some way. and it had never made him seem scarier of more evil or in any way less deserving of her love and loyalty

as the dust in the corridor clears and she looks at merlin’s just as shocked face she remembers something morgana had said earlier: ‘not even emrys can save you now.’ — followed by her own magic failing her..?

both gwen and merlin seem too shocked to bring out any words for a few long seconds, and merlin seems anxious, almost unbelieving of what he had just done in front of her eyes, waiting for her to demand an explanation.

“merlin,” she manages to bring out. “thank you.” and her smile now comes more easily than her words did.

a simple confirmation that yes, she had seen. and no, she could never hate him for it.

his face hadnt completely shaken off the expression of shock yet when he cautiously returned the smile. she held out her hand and he took it, and they silently returned to the other part of the castle. later there would be time for talking. right now theres a battle going on.

[shoezuki]

the anon + your post abt the exile arc make really good points and it also makes me apprehensive about the direction of the new plot where tommy got trapped in the prison with dream. i mean tommy + tubbo already had their huge finale showdown—where more are they going with this? i would love to see more of dream being forced to question his own ideals or some sort of character introspection, though being inhumanely tortured isn’t really conducive to that but he is now in close proximity tommy, the only extended human contact he’s had for A Really Long While, and he is a very brash and i-will-fight-god-call-them-a-bitch energy character for awhile but also like. realistically, we have a traumatized child completely stuck with his abuser for at least 7 days(as per the waiver Sam made him sign) with no avenue of escape. where will this arc go save for extreme trauma, unrepentant suffering? what could possible happen for tommy’s character that’s not a repeat of the exile arc despite narratively supposed to having his big finale power of friendship closure with while he was slowly making a new path for himself via hotel building? it almost feels like suffering for the sake of suffering at this point.

OH GOD YEA THAT WAS SOMETHIN I MEANT TO SAY SOME WORDS BOUT 

like i feel you So much like. on one hand id thought tommy was gon be steppin back n shit so this had me Confused cuz like. thought that the tommy n dream conflicts were Done. it straightup knocked me out hearin that tommy was Stuck With Dream but for all we know tommy saw not much lore progress been goin on and was like ‘fuck it. lock me up boys’ slhgslhg

but like. besides that. this COULD be so fucking good. a few things that could go like

tommy and dream are Forced to actually consider each others ideals and motivations

we get a Much Clearer reasoning From dream for shit he’s done cuz like. at most we seen him only be honest n open with Tommy even while manipulating him. with no one else around maybe we get some honest explanations. Villain Monologues or something

tommy could see what possible impact the prison and isolation has had on dream and therefore be more sympathetic (not like. specifically To Dream but seeing directly what his impact has on One person could have him considering what hes done as a Whole yknow?)

dream COULD. POTENTIALLY. develop in terms of realizing truly how his actions were fucked up. possibly. idk how likely that one would be or if itd even make Sense but even jus having a step in that direction could work

more insight into dream’s relations with past visitors? esp. ranboo but im thinking sapnap n bad to. like what is He thinking and Feeling

theyre not able to hurt each other right? or at least not like horrifically or permanently kill each other. so maybe a scenario of them yelling at each other like the techno and tommy showoff on doomsday

BUT.... like. considering we know its tommy + dream at the reigns here, and how the exile arc is strongly mirroring this. im imagining itll go like this: tommy is manipulated and tortured psychologically by dream for the next 7 days. maybe his conflicted feelings we saw back when it was the techno n tommy duo will come back and dream will convince him Hes Not That Bad and try n get himself free. 

basically. yeah. theres a LOT of potential if we look at what this new Roommates scenario is n what Could happen. i aint really feeling this sudden development or this arc felt very out of nowhere n i thought the whole hotel thing n the lil shit tommy been doin was like. it had felt Conclusive and like. a Big Friendship Finale like you said. 

theres POTENTIAL. if anything id think itd make more sense for Dream to be the one who develops as a character considering its tommy being thrown into a situation dream has been in for a Longass time but Alone. BUT. idk how confident i am that we’ll Get something Good yknow?

[tfw-no-tennis]

hunter x hunter thotz so far

soooo ruth and i started watching hunter x hunter woohoo finally! we’re like 10 or so eps in so i decided to collect some thots below on what i think so far (i havent rlly been spoiled so im interested to look back on this once ive watched more)

first off i love gon sm, hes immediately so endearing...hes just a baby!!!! just a little baby boy!!!! hes just so cute and good, im so not ready for him to get put thru the wringer later on as ive vaguely heard happens

the first few episodes were really fast paced which i enjoyed and thought was for the best. the characters came thru really strongly and i feel like we heard juuuust enough about the setting, premise, and what a hunter is 

i wasnt expecting leorio and kurapika to show up in the FIRST EP lmao that surprised me. i love so much how the three of them like IMMEDIATELY became a family unit in like 3 eps lmaoooo it was like ok here are 2 parents and their son bam. also leorio and kurapika having a showdown on the boat (which didnt end up happening) was a wild ride 

i have like zero fucking idea what a hunter is and the more they attempt to explain the more confused i get. its honestly kind of hilarious how little sense it makes. to be clear this doesnt detract from my enjoyment of the show at all (if anything it adds to it)

oh my god fuckgin hisoka is the worst he hasnt done much but i hate him so much already. good villain writing/design so far, hes so hateable

ruth every time hisoka shows up: WE HATE UR PUSSY BIIIITCH 

the character design in this show is....a lot lmao. ruth and i decided its a cross between soul eater, jojo, and one piece in terms of aesthetic. the designs are certainly unique and so many of them are just so ugly hvbjafdbdskgs it reminds me of that post thats like ‘masterpost of jojo characters who look busted as shit’ lmao

i already love this show a lot tbh like the way its structured so far has been kinda atypical for a shounen, at least in terms of fights - we really havent seen a lot of fighting yet. also nen hasnt shown up yet and its reminding me of stands not becoming a thing in jojo until p3 lmao 

anyways in litrally ep1 i already loved the 3 main characters we saw...leorio is a wild dude, i love him sm, especially as a fellow medical binch who wants MONEY. like, thats literally me. and kurapika is also wild, like damn they rlly just dropped their backstory in ep 1 huh. like we rlly are jumping right into this 

also when leorio said he was a teenager i was like WHAT???? just like evryone else which YEA omfg. i cant believe hes that young lmao. kurapika too

so leorio is one of those 19 yr olds who looks 40 and kurapika is the type of teen who looks like a 12 yr old

and KILLUA i love him sm also....hes an adorable assassin catboy and hes perfect. i love how quickly he and gon hit it off (tiny bfs.....) and how hes just like, this extra as hell 12 yr old with a SKATEBOARD and ASSASSIN SKILLS and then he sees gon and is like guess im gonna fall in love 

i gotta talk abt gon again i just love him. hes so polite and cute and kind and good, i just love him...wht a good protag. his motivation is just wild too, hes like well my dad abandoned me to go off and be a hunter (which he isnt even mad abt, what a nice lad) so im gonna do that to see what the deal is

i love how gon (just like the audience) doesnt really know what a hunter does/is and just goes into the exam totally blind lmao. also the fact that his skills seem to include jumping good, being speedy, having the energy typical of a 12 yr old, being a weather sniffer, being nice, and having good instincts/constitution as a result of having eaten random grass and forest shit growing up...amazing. 

is this gonna turn out to be one of those things where its like, wow theyve been using nen this whole time without realizing! tht would honestly explain a lot lmao 

i really enjoy how like....semi-normal the power levels are rn? while also being all over the place and wack as fucks obvs (like hisoka dissolving that guys arms in his first appearance was A Lot, as well as all the card stuff hes done..). like the part wher that blue guys (evil franky one piece) punches the ground and it leaves a crater and everyones like !!!! wow wtf thats unnatural! that literally threw me off bc that kinda thing is so normal in anime lmaoooo. but i like that thats the starting point bc it leaves a lot of room for power escalation w/out it getting too out of hand 

specifially our protags are starting out pretty low on the Shounen Badass scale - especially gon (and leorio, tho i kinda predict he wont be as fight-y? what with him being premed)

i find it kinda hilarious how killua hasnt done too much (aside from murdering those 2 randos in like half a second) despite being so clearly skilled...like when they have to do the 5v5 fight thing in the tower, i wouldve thought hed be the first up cause hes so badass but nope

actually thats what i find interesting - i was expecting all 5 (or maybe 4, we’re in the middle of leorio’s ‘fight’) of the fights to be physical smackdowns but so far nope, theyve been very cerebral. that bodes well, w/how smart the fights have been, bc i doubt the fights will get stale tht way 

tho they might be kinda frustrating sometimes - there are times when u DO just wanna see a good ole fashioned shounen beatdown yknow. but we do get enough of that now (and im sure we’ll get plenty more) to satisfy (like kurapika decking fake-franky) 

oh also the opening. its so charming and cute and i love the song...its also so hilariously basic and classic - like one of those typical 2000s anime openings where theres stock run cycles of all the main characters and theres a little animation of all the characters fighting together (and that fight doesnt actually happen, its just for the op) 

also love that leorios the only one who doesnt fight in the OP, instead getting saved from death by gon lmao. im curious if he’ll end up fighting at all (i assume a little?) and if he’ll use nen (probably healing type nen?) 

also i already wanna fistfight ging for abandoning his perfect angel son. also leorio is literally gons dad already, they even look alike wow 

that guy hanzo has done basically 0 things so far but i rlly like him already, im curious if thatll change. also sorry for calling u ‘hanzo overwatch!?!?!?!’ upon first viewing my guy 

tonpa is str8 up so annoying pls leave u pathetic loser 

tho it cracked me up when he and Evil Mr Clean were facing off and starting getting all detailed/shaded and i was like o shit is he actually badass. are we abt to see like a nen battle or st. but no....lmaooo

i found it interesting that leorio didnt really admit to wanting to be a dr at first...hes such a good dude, he kinda just let kurapika think that his motives were superficial and greedy when in actuality theyre selfless

also wanting to be rich can be a rlly interesting character motivation and i love when its done right

oh my god i cant believe it took me this long to mention the hilariously edge ED....like holy shit, its so 2000s, the song sounds like its been re-recorded like 40000 times bc of how bad the audio quality is, or something, idk how to describe music but its hilariously specific in tone and its rlly funny to see shots of the main characters smiling while this screamo whatever plays in the bg....wow. 

also s/o to killua for being king of edgy with that ‘tear of blood’ shot

i rlly like how much of the plot, especially the early hunter exam stuff, is moved along simply by gon being a good kind polite boy. 

love the fact that he and leorio and kurapika (and later killua) all team up without even saying anything...i love that, most shounen would have them be like ‘che, i cant team up with anyone, i have to prove myself ALONE or my victory wont be EARNED’ or w/e idk. who knows that might happen later but rn i love how they all effortlessly work together (and how they all contribute - without each other they would have all failed at different points) 

oh man also killuas first appearence was so funny when he drank a bunch of tonpas poisoned drinks and was like [smirks] tch, loser, im immune to poison. get dunked on. [skateboard away] i love him so fuckgin much 

omfg that part where killua looks all shoujo/kawaii and is talking abt how hes gonna kill his family or w/e and gon is just like ^_^? i love they

HOOOOLY FUCK I ALMOST FORGOT, BUT 65% OF THE REASON I MADE THIS POST WAS TO MENTION HISOKAS THEME LMAOOOOO his music being like fuckgin, spanish guitar/traditional mexican type music is sooooo goddamn funny to me for some reason, like the first time it played i was like ok whats going ON with this spanish guitar lmao but then i figured out that its his theme and god thats so funny 

hisoka is also so fuckign jojo like he could so easily be in jojo. he and dio would be the fakest best friends ever and would constantly try to kill each other on the lowdown and shittalk each other constantly in private but be super sweet to each others faces. also they would hatefuck. no im not taking criticism bye 

i rlly love everyones backstories also, and i find it interesting that weve gotten to hear/see at least some of all 4 of the MCs backstories. theyre all compelling and interesting and i cant wait to dive in further 

also calling it now but kurapika is totally gonna get way too absorbed in revenge and get fucked up/disregard their own life (maybe in the style of robin in one piece?) we’ll see but i feel like it aint gonna end well. i could be wrong, i really havent been spoiled at all, thats just my guess 

hbahjfbshjf the ep that was called ‘hisoka x is x sneaky’ was SO funny that reads like a dora the explorer ep title 

also i had no idea the ep titles were formatted like that w/the x’s and thats rlly funny 

ok but the part where leorio - who seems to be pretty bad at fighting - tries to fight hisoka - whose literal first appearence involved him effortlessly dissolving a dudes arms - is so fucking funny. leorio rlly b a premed w/no brain cells....same bro. 

also i loved the Cutthroat Kitchen portion of the hunter exam and how not a single contestant was any good at it lmaoooo. do they not have the cooking channel in hxh-verse earth 

ok i love how the main characters are all intuitive in different ways depending on their own skills, like how killua can immediately guess that kurapika has never killed anyone before after they didnt kill evil-franky

kurapika joined killua in the Edgy Corner during that part also. like, they both have legit reasons to be edgy, but the shots of kurapika sitting in the darker tunnel part was kinda funny

also killua, a literal 12 yr old, calling out kurapika for being a murder virgin was pretty hilarious 

ok also i didnt know that madhouse animated hxh which is rlly funny but w/e i love the animation especially the occasional chibi parts and the facial expressions (like killuas ‘i love murder’ catboy expressions) 

oh also when killua murdered those 2 guys and his hand was all vein-y and his nails were pointy, his hands looked like hisokas do...i wonder if thats a legit connection or it hisoka just b getting his nails did 

kurapika talking abt how even seeing a regular spider makes them rlly angry was both very sad and kinda funny. kura u have so many issues god bless 

kurapikas smackdown on evil blue franky was fuckin dope tho. and the red eyes reveal was SPOICY 

rlly love how the individual fights highlights the characters strengths/morals/motivations/whatever....the writing is already really strong tbh 

ugh ok ive ranted enough this is a Lot lmao its so disorganized but w/e 

basically i love this series so far and im rlly curious whatll happen next. also everything seems pretty chill and upbeat so far (relatively) and i know this shit gets dark and im NOT FUCKING READY. 

til next timeeee

[endwalkr]

I WAS HOPING YOU'D REBLOG THAT LOL... FFVII and Twilight Princess?

sorry it took me so long to reply! test week am i right ;D

i’m not very familiar with the ff7 ost, but i think i know enough about it to be able to answer! 

twilight princess: 

Fav Character Theme:

ooo the only character themes i can really think of are ilia’s, midna’s and zelda’s lullaby, but i love midna’s theme a lot! i like how the motif is used in different songs too, it’s really great :D

Fav Area Theme:

oh god there’s a ton in this game, i like ordon village cause it’s just so nice and calming, lake hylia for the same reason, OH SHIT i forgot about hyrule field… it’s just so heroic and nostalgic and i love it. 

Fav Battle Theme:

THE FYRUS THEME 100% the orchestra rendition is even better!!!! i LOVE the part where you’ve knocked him over and the game’s like GO KILL HIM! HELL YEAH!

Fav Boss/Final Boss Theme:

the ganondorf theme. i’m really used to the 25th anniversary orchestra versions so the original sounds a little off to me but it’s still a really good composition :0 i just go crazy over that ganon leitmotif sjkghksjhgk

Personal Fav Theme:

this is a little hard to say since i don’t feel suuuuper strongly about this ost! i’ll just name a few i like a lot, gerudo desert, midna’s lament (duh), hidden village, and all the songs i mentioned earlier

A song you didn’t like at first but grew to like:

the hyrule field night theme. it used to freak me out but now i think it’s really nice and soothing! 

One of the first songs you heard from the game:

i think it must’ve been the 25th anniversary movement, so… the title screen? it’s a really good song so that’s perfect :D

A song that gets you pumped:

both orchestra pieces fucking get me going man ! the second one almost made me cry just now jhgkshkgs it really reminds me of super mario galaxy and that ost is so dear to my heart too

A song that makes you happy:

there’s a ton of silly songs in this game: malo mart, the postman’s theme and oocoo’s theme so i guess they make me smile :) other than that, the title screen and other nostalgic stuff

A song that makes you sad:

IUUUH HHH the first 2 seconds of the staff credits is already getting me teary eyed :*(((((( 

The song you like least from the game:

the dungeon themes i guess. i don’t usually care for those at all, especially the arbiter’s grounds isn’t pleasant to listen to at all jhgksg

final fantasy vii:

like i said, i don’t know this ost that well, so i’m probably only gonna answer with super popular pieces shkghks

Fav Character Theme:

tifa’s theme! especially the advent children one where it’s a piano solo. it’s so gentle and soft, it reflects her perfectly!

Fav Area Theme:

underneath the rotting pizza. the bass made me lose my mind at first jshgkjsdhgks also the good ol main theme motif ;D ALSO ALSO i fucking love the build up to absolutely nothing shdgsk forested temple too, gotta love the james bond chords 

Fav Battle Theme:

i rly like both fighting and still more fighting! i love singing along with the boss theme to see if i can keep up with the fast ass organ shredding sjhgksdhgks (also theres too many names for the normal battle themes i never know which one’s the best)

Fav Boss/Final Boss Theme:

JENOVA COMPLETE BABEY!!! preferably the distant worlds version. that’s definitely the apocalypsis noctis of ff7 for me

Personal Fav Theme:

opening bombing mission for sure. i’ll get into that later

A song you didn’t like at first but grew to like:

i listened to a few of the ff7 songs on the ffxv car radio and i never really liked the cosmo canyon music for some reason? but now i really like it. i’m not sure why lol

One of the first songs you heard from the game:

distant worlds opening bombing mission!!!!!! i watched all crisis core cutscenes in the week before botw came out in february 2017 and then watched the ffvii remake trailer that was available at that time. i guess i just really loved the background music so i then proceeded to play obm on our trip that entire week jfhgkjshsgk

A song that gets you pumped:

crazy motorcycle chase! i’m bopping to it rn skjghjskh also jenova complete and one winged angel. also j-e-n-o-v-a!

A song that makes you happy:

the main theme :’) i guess it doesn’t really have that nostalgic factor for me but it’s so elegant and pretty and then the mysterious dark part happens and then it ends all beautiful and its just good. 

A song that makes you sad:

i don’t know enough abt the original ff7 to really answer this? there’s not really any song that makes me sad (YET). the main theme is so good that it does give me surrogate nostalgic feelings about this game even if i’ve never played it sjhgksh

The song you like least from the game:

i’m not sure! i guess the more dissonant music that’s supposed to sound unpleasant. it’s that way with all osts lol

[celestialcarousels]

I’m back 4 years later and the tags on this original post is throwing me for a loop because literally NOTHING HAS CHANGED I feel completely the same!! 4 YEARS LATER LMFAO. Astrology is a damn lie because my mutable dominant ass has not evolved at all wow.

tired of being empty inside all the time.

[undyinglantern]

just to be clear i ive known abt the song for months bc. okay, heres what happened. yt recommended gbgb and i liked it so i added it to the playlist, but i was too focused on upcoming vctn album that i put aside listening to them for until after. so next day, after i'd listened to chaos album and probably a few hours to get it out of my system, i listened through their discography (starting from oldest album→newest) and cysm was the first i came across and liked. but i only listened to it like once bc i still had vctn on the brain for the next idk how many months. it was actually antiromantic that slowly wormed its way into my brain, which is the song that piqued my interest to look into their stuff more deeply (theres other groups i got into inbetween all this but thats besides the point). it was also their chaos chapter and b-sides of their latest album that i got hooked on though bc i am -at my very core- always and forever in my emo phase so i didnt watch the music video for cysm until literally yesterday. BUT

i dont think ive ever felt this strongly about a music video before or maybe im just a sucker for symbolism but i was so blown away like it felt like i'd watched an arthouse film or something (in a complimentary way; i mean nothing pretentious). idk how to explain it but it was more than just a 'tug on my emotions' or 'fun and pretty to watch' experience; like, 0x1=lovesong is a 'tug @ emotions' song and the mv serves amplifies that, while gbgb is more of the latter for both song and video. idk i dont think im making sense, or maybe i dont pay enough attention to enough mvs to experience it enough, but it was just such a good combination of the two and really left me feeling like the final experience was 'greater that the sum of its part' sort of deal.

[chainedtothedarkness]

ok last posts aside idk if its bc of the 8 hydroxyzine pills i took last night but moodwise im not as awful..? still negative and mostly numb but its more of a daze than say, feeling like im drowning

theres a specific spot/muscle in my right shoulder thats hurting intensely for who knows why bc of course something somewhere has to act up without reason ahaha...

my a.c.e seasons greetings is supposed to arrive today but i feel mostly apathetic about it ? no excitement or anything. in fact the only thing i feel is “why did i bother to waste money on such a pointless thing” bc truly why did i waste money on it lmao i dont fucking have money to waste on unimportant shit like this why am i irresponsible idc if i bought it last month or whatever its so irresponsible and worthless

also for today i have clean laundry im supposed to pack out and a few other tasks i should do if i dont want to be an utterly useless piece of shit as i normally am , like try applying to that job that lobo told me about in november that i chickened out from applying to just because they wanted a cover letter which idk how  to do bc ive never done one before pure self sabotage its almost hilarious if it wasnt so disgustingly pathetic

i also hve to make my bed bc mother washed the sheets but idk how to do that when im in so much pain but whatever i guess

oh this  is off topic but today and yesterdya i woke up to geoffrey lying down right next to my head ? he doesnt normally do that so idk if the cat is worried abt me or something but its...nice i guess. but i wish he had a better owner than me ahahaha....... poor cat

uhh i also kind of miss a few persons significantly like uh... andi, cami, hajar, emballa, jester, anjali, brooke, taylor...? i guess? like part of me is worried(?) and wonders how theyre all doing etc but i also still dont want to converse because i know im only capable of causing pain in this state ahahaha... and theyre all better off without me...

on a much more pathetic note while im still strongly disinterested/indifferent about a.c.e i do somewhat miss donghun . .? his voice and his smile and his comforting presence..? ahahaha its so laughable and pathetic. imagine missing a stranger who doesnt know you exist. imagine wishing he did know you when all you are is pain and negativity and uselessness and worthlssness. imagine missing someone you only know some sort of warped image of... its so stupid ...

anyway thats enough rnating for now, my arms/wrists/hands hurt from typing so im just going to go force mysel f to at least unpakc the laundry and make my bed just so that mother doesnt get angry with me for being useless. . .

[uniformbravo]

“quick” life update while i wait for my ipod to charge

(do ppl even still use ipods in this day & age. whats spotify)

i never made any posts abt it but i started the new semester & im taking 2 classes, it’s funny actually bc i waited even more til the last minute than i usually do to figure out my classes & spent the 1st week of school trying to see a counselor to find out if i still needed classes and that’s a whole other story for a whole other day but long story short the answer was no but i decided to take a couple anyway

mainly because every time im not in school The Depression takes over & i just needed something to Do so im taking intermediate painting (even tho painting 1 made me want 2 die every day) and animation (even tho i’ve already decided i don’t want to be an animator????)

so heres the thing, okay, since these are classes i don’t need in order to fill any requirements or anything i had to pick them based on nothing, really, like my main reason for taking classes this semester was to give myself something to do, right. i picked painting because my friend had told me she was taking it so i was like yo i’ll just do that too bc we had fun last time & it’s a good way to stay in contact. originally that was gonna be my only class bc i knew it’d be a lot of work and time but then i talked to my school’s art counselor about transferring to another school after im graduated from here and i’d said i was maybe interested in storyboarding so we looked at schools with animation programs and i decided super last minute to just take the animation class here and Boy what a mistake

last semester i was talking on here about a computer art class i had considered taking but dropped bc it seemed kinda... shitty?? because i hated the way the teacher taught and i felt like i wasn’t gonna gain anything from the class??? well animation is taught by the same guy and hhhhhhhhh he’s so fucking unhelpful it’s such a nothing class

see i was hoping to learn some hand-drawn animation basics like timing, squash & stretch, the fucking bouncing ball assignment, shit like that, right. the teacher was like “today we’re gonna go over the 12 principles of animation” and i was like “sweet i’ve heard of that this’ll be good” & literally he brought up a list, read off most of the names, briefly described a few, and told us to google it if we wanted more info like?? holy shit dude????? thanks for nothing oh my god

i’ve been taking a lot of time practicing animating in flipnote studio on my 3ds and watching youtube videos and i’ve been learning so much more from that than anything explained by my teacher bc godddd. basically what the class boils down to is like. flash animation. so far we’ve been working in adobe illustrator and animate & i cannot stand illustrator. i know it’s a good and useful program and if i wanted to i could learn how to use it & eventually get used to it but just the way he teaches it makes me want 2 slam dunk my computer

the computer art basics class was strongly recommended to be taken before this class but tbh i don’t even think that’s the issue here because i tried to take that class and his method was the same; he does a demo on screen that you’re supposed to follow along and do with him and he explains what hes doing as he goes but he goes so fast that if u miss a step ur fucked 

and it’s not just that he goes fast, it’s also that theres no understanding of the program itself, like ok u know how in math there’s all these formulas where if u just plug numbers into them it gives u the right answer? i always understood formulas better when i knew what each variable stood for & why the values were being added or multiplied together because then it made it easier to extract the information i needed from word problems and also helped me memorize the formulas themselves easier because i could make those associations between numbers and purpose. i had the groundwork of the formula, so i could apply it to all kinds of situations

this class is like, he only gives you the very specific formulas required to accomplish very specific tasks in the programs so i can’t make the connections to figure out how to perform other tasks and i get super lost every time & it’s super frustrating & i could ask for help because he comes around and helps people who need it but i sit in the back corner so he never really even looks my way so i feel like i can’t get his attention w/o speaking up or getting up to go get him & i get lost so often that it’s really just a pain to ask him every single time

i just hate when i have a problem in one of the programs & i just have absolutely no clue how to fix it or even work around it? im used to photoshop and illustrator is just so opposite that my brain doesn’t want to work with it so im. 100% floundering in this class

we have 2 assignments during the whole semester, the first was a group project where we hand draw a 3-second animation (~30 frames) and that was literally the very first thing we did in the class with no prior guidance and honestly i suspect that the only reason he assigns it is to fill the requirement for a group project (which i know is a thing bc a lot of my past teachers have talked about it being a thing) so it was literally just. a nothing project

the second assignment is our final which is a 90-second animation (~1080 frames) and we have basically the rest of the semester to work on it, so about a month and a half-ish? and all we’ve learned how to do so far is motion tweening in animate, basically. i mean we did a ball-and-string thing which was kind of different but it mostly involved a lot of copy+paste bullshit in illustrator & also like automatic shortcuts & stuff, there was really no drawing involved at all

also it’s one of those classes where everyone just kind of messes around and does their own thing like?? i saw one girl reading manga on her computer & these two dudes at my table were comparing yugioh cards & i hear like 50 thousand conversations about anime every day & i mean im not one to talk tbh but it’s just the atmosphere, it feels like u either know what ur doing or u just fuck around w/ ur friends and im in the “neither of those” category and the girl who was reading manga is in the “both” category bc every other time i’ve looked over there she’s got this amazing masterpiece on her screen that she made in illustrator & i die inside every time what the fuckkc 

he showed us examples of final projects from last semester and i noticed that some of them were done traditionally or in programs that were obviously not illustrator so i asked him about it & he said it doesn’t have to be done in illustrator/animate as long as it’s 90 seconds long so Guess What i think i’m just gonna make it somewhere else lmaooo i mean i feel like it’s a missed opportunity bc i have these programs at my disposal & im not even using them but god amn. god fuckign damn

im thinking of animating it in flipnote bc that’s what i’ve been using & im pretty familiar with it by now but im not sure because there are some important things im not sure i’ll be able to accomplish with it like backgrounds (which are another requirement for the assignment) and i don’t want to back myself into a corner, especially with how little time i have to do it, so idk for sure. my other idea was to use clip studio paint but i have the pro version which only lets u use 24 frames per animation which totals out to a whopping 2 seconds so idk if i want to have to deal with that bullshit either. right now im considering making the rough animation in flipnote so i can figure out the timing & shit and then slapping it into clip studio to finalize everything (or technically i could even do that in photoshop, since im more familiar w/ it & can probably work faster there- from photoshop it’d be a matter of copying the finished frames into clip studio to export into 2-second clips & then compile those in movie maker & then bam finished animation)

so!!! it’s a lot of shit im dealing with in this class & im just like. if im doing it this way then why do i even need to show up for class. what am i even in this class for im just basically making an animation on my own time with my own resources using none of the techniques taught in the class. im only doing this animation because it’s an assignment for the class im not gaining anything from. it just seems so pointless & the only thing getting me through it is the thought that i could possibly put this in a portfolio somewhere down the line, and for that i’d want it to look nice and not rushed so im thinking that for the sake of finishing the assignment i might just use my rough animation so that i can spend more time on the “nice” version afterward

aaaanyway it’s um Late for me & i went on about this for too long but i needed to get it off my chest tbh, i’ve been thinking abt making this post for like 2 weeks so there u go. i didn’t even talk about my painting troubles good lord. if you’ve been wondering why i havent been online as much lately This is why. also bc im a huge loser and 100% of my free time has been going into watching anime bye

[cielospeaks]

this is just.. i wanted to do it for fun

heroes originals

18/36 characters have, all are 5 stars

-ofc w the case of heroes, most of them are 5 stars by default, besides tt reward characters, which also are given as 5 stars by default so..yea.

-also to note theres a lot that are limited that i have no interest in lol. i would however not mind getting helbindi eventually!

archanea (1/3/11/12)

37/46 characters have, of them 18 are 5 stars (of those 18, 5 are seasonals)

-i plan to level up original palla/est eventually, and possibly could extend to the altean knights, navarre, and/or ogma, esp to celebrate a second tms banner w touma and yashiro. (ogma just bc i think hes neat and his jp va is in mari and gali)

-im not partial much to any archanea characters i havent gotten yet but if i had to say, maybe hardin or phina?

valentia (2/15)

24/41 characters have, 17 are 5 stars

-honestly i didnt intend to roll most of them, but this game likes to throw 15 characters at me so. thats a thing. i could see the number of 5 stars increasing further depending on things.

-i have everyone i want thats added in 15. in fact, pls dont pity break me w these characters.

genealogy (4)

17/25 characters have, 13 are 5 stars

-idk 4 has a tiny cast and a lot of them i kinda like, or liked enough to roll for. or they just came home randomly like eldigan but i dont mind that. despite that i could i dont see complete 5 starring everyone or trying to complete the collection, i dont feel strongly enough abt the other characters tbh

-on the other hand pls come home altena.

thracia (5)

11/16 characters have, all are 5 stars

-the only one where i have all 5 stars, and proud! im quite fond of all the added characters, so it only makes sense.

-still rlly want eyvel to come home! if olwen eventually comes home randomly i wont be mad (most likely)

binding blade (6)

26/33 characters have, 15 are 5 stars

-theres... a couple i might eventually 5 star here? the pegasus sisters, fir, and regular lilina are options for sure, maybe cecilia too? or gwen when she gets a refine?

-im not partial to any that i dont have necessarily. most are seasonals. maybe sue? but thats only if she feels like it lol

blazing sword (7)

37/49 characters have, 32 are 5 stars

-i dont rlly see 5 starring the others lol. maybe hawkeye? idk tho, theyd def be after everyone else thats a higher priority. narcian is 5 star but still waiting on weapon refine to level up lol

-also not really needing anyone to come home. i wouldnt mind a random dorcas tbh tho

sacred stones (8)

14/31 characters have, 7 are 5 stars

-possibly the lowest number, at least so far, of 5 stars from a game. ig i dont rlly care much for a lot of the lower rarity/not 5 star characters, def not enough to level them to 5 star.

radiance games (9/10)

22/45 characters have, 17 are 5 stars

-this number will increase on wed to 23/18 bc of altina! but im doing how it is now for now lol.

-i dont rlly think theres anyone i feel i need or want from it, nor anyone i need to 5 star lol

awakening (13)

38/61 characters have, 22 are 5 stars

-i actually plan on making a “sheperds” brigade at some point, due to it being one of the few games i actually like the whole (adult) cast. this could extend to the later characters like walhart/aversa or ones that join after the skip like henry or cherche. idk yet tho

-i guess id want more of the sheperds i dont have, like sumia and mari? but then again its not a huge priority

fates (14)

65/89 characters have, 47 are 5 stars

-a few things of note- full cams nee team! full ryoma nii team! all of the variants of the other siblings but taku (no new years) and xan nii (no easter).azur nee (original) like narcian is 5 star but not leveled up bc heck gem weapons

-i wouldnt mind eventually getting spring xan nii/new years taku/fallen corn, but theres prolly others id want more?

3h (16)

5/18 characters have, all are 5 stars

-besides annie i have no desire for the other characters. heck, hilda and sothis i wasnt even intending to get, esp the latter. but i dont rlly mind, she was a good in the voting gauntlet so shes earned it. but pls come home annie

tms

3/5 characters have, all are 5 stars

-all i gotta say is pls come home mamorin and kiria! everytime i summon on a green or red orb randomly im just chanting their names lol