#but then i saw snootl and was like YOU.

[sweet-beezus]

Snootl blessed by a hoard of buttons, a fun attack for @bogkeep!!

[freesia-writes]

Ch 17: Graffiti

~ Master List ~ Previous Chapter ~ WC: 2.7k

“You really don’t need to be doing this,” Omega said quietly, her face downcast as she dipped her rag in the small, soapy bucket of water. “I’m the one who messed up.” She continued rubbing at the carelessly spray painted stucco wall, watching the bright colors slowly fade beneath the cleaning solvent. 

“We all mess up,” Lyra answered soothingly, scrubbing in circles with her own brush. “You never ‘arrive’. Or you might feel like you do, and then something swipes your legs out from under you or you do something stupid again.” She chuckled, glancing at the girl to see if her words were helpful or discouraging. “But you’re smart and kind, and your heart is in the right place. That’s what matters.”

“This didn’t seem so smart or kind.”

“Well, you clearly have the right perspective now, so I think you can chalk it up to a lesson learned and move on.”

“Hm.”

They cleaned in silence for a while, side by side in front of the small, flat wall of one of the square island homes on the outside of the Town Square. A barely-recognizable (and wildly crass)artistic rendition of Sy Snootles was slowly disappearing as they chipped away at it little by little. 

“Sometimes we beat ourselves up because we feel like it makes up for it,” Lyra offered, and Omega nodded in response, rubbing her hair out of her face for a moment before continuing her task. 

“I just don’t get how I can simultaneously know that it’s stupid and yet get carried right along in it.”

“It’s hard to go against the flow.”

“Yeah, I guess so. I’m not exactly one who has ever really fit in anywhere though.”

“I think your brothers would disagree,” Lyra suggested, touching her elbow in a brief pause. A slight warmth appeared on Omega’s face, and she nodded again, pressing her lips together as she stepped back to look at their progress. 

“It all happened so fast,” she said, looking at the colorful vandalism that she’d been coerced into the night before. “And I don’t know where the idea even came from, but suddenly we were all just… Ugh.” 

“Can I offer an old lady sentiment that might help in future situations?” 

Omega laughed, returning to her scrubbing, “You’re not an old lady.”

“Alright, well… Just remember this. Nothing good happens after midnight.”

They shared a quiet chuckle, each nodding with their own understanding of the adage as they continued their cleaning in silence. 

Hunter sighed from where he was leaning against the building across the street, having approached to check on Omega but pausing as he sensed a sort of intimacy occurring between the two. He’d hung back, listening to their words as best he could to ensure he wasn’t interrupting something important. A deep gratitude settled in his heart as he heard Lyra’s gentle encouragement, and he shifted from one foot to the other, unsure if he should even make an appearance at this point. But he did have something he wanted to say to Omega, and the sooner the better, as he felt bad for the way he’d reacted when he’d found out about her ill-fated shenanigans.

She probably wouldn’t have shared it with him in the first place, but Omega had arrived at their cabin in the wee hours of the morning, sniffling so loudly as she headed for bed that Hunter had to investigate. She’d been overwhelmed with remorse, partly because of her participation in unsavory activities, but mostly because when they had finished spray painting the side of the house, a few of the kids had thrown the paint cans at the wall in triumph. Their shortsighted actions had resulted in the homeowner coming out to see what the fuss was, and his appearance had solidified her realization that this sort of thing was not what she wanted to be about. 

“He was so old and frail,” Omega was telling Lyra now, voice quivering with miserable remembrance. “He shuffled out here and saw all of this, and his face just fell. It was awful. The others ran away, but I just… I couldn’t. He looked at me and was so sad. He asked why we did this, and I couldn’t answer him. I just promised I’d make it right. I commed the other kids this morning to help clean it up, and they either laughed at me or ignored it.”

“Because they’re idiots,” Hunter said, appearing behind them without warning. Lyra startled a bit, flinging soap bubbles across her skirt as her hand jerked the brush she’d just dipped in the bucket.

“Do you make a habit of sneaking up on people?” she asked, a smile diffusing the mild indignation in her voice. 

“Usually just animals,” he winked, then looked at Omega. “How’s it goin?”

“Fine,” she said quietly, not meeting his gaze. Lyra looked back and forth between the two, picking up on the discomfort, and turned to continue her scrubbing, slowly moving down the wall to give them some space. 

“Hey, listen…” Hunter began, running a hand through his hair and resting it awkwardly on the back of his neck for a moment. 

“Please don’t lecture me,” Omega said abruptly, rubbing the wall harder with her rag. “I feel bad enough already.”

“No… That’s not… No,” he fumbled, shaking his head and dropping his hand to his side. “I uh… I’m sorry. You were already sad about it, and I jumped down your throat… I was just… I don’t know, I hate that these kids can cause you so much trouble.”

“Ah,” she said in quiet revelation, slowing her vigorous scrubbing a bit as she began to register his unspoken fears and the deep care he held for her. “Yeah. It’s messy sometimes.”

“I can see that,” he attempted, stepping back to look at what was left of the so-called artwork: the bottom half of the Pa'lowick singer in a very embellished style. “You guys really went for it, eh?”

“Ugh,” Omega said with a roll of the eyes. 

“This part here is particularly notable,” Lyra remarked quietly, gesturing at the ample, curvaceous buttcheeks that they’d given the otherwise flat-bottomed entertainer. “It feels a little weird rubbing them so hard.” Her deadpan delivery made both Hunter and Omega chuckle, and he went to stand behind Lyra, admiring the creation. 

“I think you missed a spot,” he teased, pointing over her shoulder to what looked like a few exaggerated hairs that would have been poking out of an obscene place. “Better get in there.” Lyra shot him a look, meeting his eyes with an initial flash of humorous challenge, but it quickly melted into an amused admiration that Omega couldn’t have missed if she wanted to. The young girl’s eyes flickered from her to Hunter, whose sharp features were similarly relaxed and warm, and she bent over the cleaning bucket with a small smile. 

“You might as well make yourself useful if you’re gonna stand here and critique our work,” Omega announced, tossing Hunter an extra rag after she’d squeezed it out. He didn’t expect it to come flying his way so quickly, yet he did indeed catch it, though not without his tight grasp sending a splotch of soapy water across his chest. With a grumble in Omega’s direction and a mockingly stern grin at Lyra in response to her laughter, he found his own spot on the wall and began to help. 

They fell into thought-filled silence for a while, working slowly and steadily until the graffiti was almost gone. A few stubborn spots remained, and Omega paused, stretching her arms out in different directions to refresh them a bit. Lyra gave her a pat on the back and a reassuring nod when the girl met her gaze, returning it with a small smile of her own. 

“Next time they try to make me do something stupid, I’m gonna tell them to stuff it,” Omega resolved, ignoring the approving snicker from Hunter. 

“It’s so hard, especially in the moment,” Lyra commiserated. “It took me years, and… Well… I still don’t think I’m very good at standing up for myself.” Hunter snuck a glance at her out of the corner of his eye, his mind wandering to her attractive coworker who had the gall to regale her with his sordid tales of sexual escapades. 

“You seem to be pretty calm about everything,” Omega observed. “It makes you look confident.” 

“Oh gosh,” Lyra laughed, tossing her braid back over her shoulder to look at the girl with an openness on her face. “I’m glad it comes across that way. I just… I don’t want to get into anything with anyone, and I don’t think my opinions are particularly life-changing, so… Not a lot of need to make myself big or forceful for any reason. It’s easier to just do your own thing, I guess.”

“Don’t you get lonely?”

Lyra hesitated, thrown off by the girl’s uncanny way of zeroing in on a tender point. She considered her words, slowly moving her brush back and forth against the wall and taking a moment to reflect so that she could answer honestly. “Yes,” she said simply, the depth of emotion behind her words creating a flurry of feelings in Hunter. “There are people that were very special to me who are no longer in my life. I connected with them so deeply that it makes other relationships seem pale in comparison. But I suppose that might be my own tainted perspective…” 

“Yeah, people seem to change once you get to know them,” Omega said, thinking of her own shifting relationships with her friends. “Or they want you to change.”

“I used to be more… flexible,” Lyra admitted. “When I was young and in school, I wanted to do whatever it took to be included. To not be made fun of. I also thought it was super fun to take risks, try new things, and be whoever they wanted me to be on any given day. Eventually, it started to feel a little empty, because there were very few constants in my life, so it was like… who am I, at the core? I realized my identity was dependent on ‘them’, and who even is ‘them’? The most outspoken people, who I later realized were just the most insecure… and they depended on mockery and false confidence to make themselves feel superior.” She paused, looking back at the girl. “Sorry, I’m talking a lot.”

“No, keep going,” Omega encouraged. “It’s tragically relatable.”

“Tragically,” Lyra echoed with a chuckle. “I mean, that’s basically it. I didn’t understand until I was a little older that it was my choice to let their opinions matter to me or not. Once I stopped caring, there was a sort of freedom. But, it took me a long time to get there – I was already an adult, and I was out of that environment where you’re forced to be around these people all day. Anyway… This probably isn’t helpful, but a potential encouragement to you might be the fact that the rest of your year is more site-based than classroom-based, so you don’t have to be around the herd mentality as much.”

They continued chatting, slowly fading from school talk to random life things, and Hunter remained quiet. He found his eyes wandering across the hunch of Lyra’s back as she finished scrubbing off the last bit of alien foot, and his hand twitched at his side at the sight of the little pieces of hair that had fallen from her braid to tickle the side of her face instead. He was moved by her vulnerability and authenticity, and it was causing a surprising reaction within.

“Ohh, look at that! It hasn’t been so bright since it was brand new!” a frail voice broke through, and its owner soon made an appearance, tottering along in his slow, steady gait. “Thank you, young lady.”

“I’m sorry it happened in the first place,” Omega said, moving back in satisfaction as she checked the entire wall for any remaining paint. 

“Well thank you for making it right. That’s more than your friends could say for themselves,” the elderly man remarked. 

“Yes sir,” she agreed, packing up her cleaning supplies. They exchanged some polite pleasantries and eventually parted ways, Omega heading home for a shower and nap, Hunter and Lyra finding themselves immediately lost in a random conversation as they leaned on the low stone wall across the street. He laughed heartily at something she said, surprising himself with the openness of his delight, then slowly quieted, regarding her with an almost bashful admiration. His face grew serious, watching her stare down the street at the people milling about, and he wondered where her mind was. His own was in a few places at once, the internal conflict driving him crazy. Following her gaze, he scanned the cobblestoned path, idly noting every gap and bump in the road as he mulled everything over, frowning in concentration.

“Hunter?” her low voice jerked him from his reverie, and a little wave of tingles ran down his body as he lightly touched his arm, pulling her hand back when he turned to look at her a little too quickly. “Sorry,” she continued, glancing down and away. “I just wondered what you were up to for the rest of the day?”

“Well, I’ve got some things to finish up in the shop,” he said, almost regretfully. He stood up straight, absently adjusting his shirt, then looked at her with a renewed intensity. “And then… Uh… Would you like to go for a walk?” 

“Always,” she answered with a smile. “Meet at the edge?” They’d developed a habit of starting their walks from the point between their houses where the sloping meadows met The Forest. But he shook his head, fidgeting with his fingers.

“I wanted to try something different, if you’re up for it,” he admitted, kicking himself at his sudden sheepishness. “I’ll meet you at your fence?”

“Oh, sure,” she nodded. “Sounds good.” 

“Ah, so this is why you aren’t in your shop!” Wrecker’s voice broke through as he approached from a side street. “I’ve had about four people ask me if I knew where you were. Why isn’t your comm on?” 

“Must have forgotten…” Hunter muttered, shooting Lyra a quick smirk. 

“Oh suuuure,” Wrecker laughed, clapping Hunter on the back. “You retire and you think you can just slack off…” He drifted off in response to the sharp look from Hunter and began backtracking as best he could. “I mean, retire from the last job… And don’t take this one too seriously… You know. Anyway, hi Lyra! How are you?”

“I’m alright, Wrecker,” she said with a chuckle, gasping for air as he trapped her arms against her sides in a big hug before releasing her and stepping back to admire the two of them standing beside each other. 

“I sure am glad you two are dating,” Wrecker declared, unabashed glee across his face. “You’re just adorable together.” Hunter’s blush was partly covered by his tattoo, but the speed at which his hand flew to awkwardly rub his neck was a bit of a giveaway. Lyra similarly shifted on her feet, clasping her arms together across her front then releasing them.

“We’re… We’re just friends,” she deflected, staring at the ground too hard to notice Wrecker’s eyebrows climbing up his forehead or the quick furrowing of Hunter’s brow before he hid it behind a carefully neutral expression.

“Oh. Really?” Wrecker stammered. “Ahh, I mean. Yeah. I’m glad you’re friends. Welp, I’ll see you later!”

“Later,” Hunter echoed, turning to Lyra. “I’ll see you later tonight?”

“Can’t wait,” she smiled, turning demurely to head toward the path to her home. Hunter watched her go, then slowly made his way toward his own, grappling with the undeniable fact that her deflection had somehow rubbed him the wrong way while being equally confused and clueless as to why.

.

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[weirdmarioenemies]

Hey you know Snood? I've been thinking about Snood lately. It is fascinating, in a "weird old game series that I have never thought about very much" sort of way. It's not the first Matching Icons Puzzle Shooting game, since that was Puzzle Bobble, but it was ONE of the first, and replaces bubbles with some little freaks, so it is neat enough to me!

I started this post with the intention of reviewing every single Snood individually, but then I realized, I don't really care about the Snoods themselves at all! Sorry Snoods! I appreciate you being weird little guys, you're just not my kind of weird little guys.

But who's that weird little guy in the bottom right...?

Name: The Robot

Debut: Snood

Oh hell yeah! A The Robot? Now that's my kind of weird little guy! The Robot is NOT a Snood, but I think it is the most important character. The game is ABOUT the Snoods, but The Robot is the HERO. The Snoods are all trapped, and must be freed by matching three or more together! And who is loading up the cannon with snoods, allowing for this to happen at all? That's right! The Robot!

The Robot's design is very simple and very 90s shareware game. This thing has gradients like nobody's business, and they sure do make it look metallic and cylindrical, so that's good! Its "head" is a glass-looking dome, and most notable is probably its single arm, that it uses to transfer Snoods. However, it's kind of easy to view the claw as a pair of lips on the end of a stalk.

Like Sy Snootles, the best Star Wars character! Wait... Sy SNOODles? The implications are staggering! (I will not elaborate about what the implications could possibly be)

In Snood Plus, The Robot receives a bit of a redesign, which I don't like all that much. That's not colorful... where's the love, in the soul of this robot? I know it's in there somewhere. This one floats, which is cool and maybe more efficient, but it's just much more bland and generic, especially its claw arm, which no longer looks like ANY part of Sy Snootles. Next!

YES! YES! AWESOME! This is how The Robot appears in Snood Slide, a Match 3-style spinoff, and it is the best! I love this cartoony style, keeping the bright and eye-catching color of the original, while making it look more like a thing that exists, rather than just some shapes! There's a light bulb in its head, it wears SHOES, and it has TWO arms now! Is that canon? Has it always had two arms, and we only ever saw it from the side? Is Snood Slide canon to the greater Snood series? Well akshually, Snood HD, the version of Snood released in 2009, completely redesigned all the Snoods, and said that the original style was just a simulation. I bet the Snood loreheads were furious about that!

I'm sure you aren't wondering how The Robot factors into Snood Slide, considering there is not a Snood-O-Matic Cannon to be loaded. That's something only Snoodheads would worry about. But the answer is that The Robot will appear and move a line of Snoods if you use the hint feature! So kind of it.

Hey... The Robot is not in Snood HD, and that game decanonized the original Snood! Is The Robot even real? Is it a fictional character in the Snood universe too, and therefore fictional TWICE over? I don't know. Snood is a mess.

They released a game in 2022 where the icon looks like this. That's so quaint to me. Never change, Snood.

[snootlestheangel]

Break For Your Heart Snippet

"🔫 for something Prison Break AU related " from Snootles's homebrew ask game @stuffireadandenjoy *this sat in my drafts way too long. I had an idea and then it went poof! But I like this one better*

[takes place post-prison break]

"What's it like?" Simon asked, breaking the awkward silence as they both struggled to fall asleep. Soap didn't move from his bed, kept his back to Simon, and for a brief moment, he tricked Simon into thinking he had managed to fall asleep.

"What's what like?" Soap finally grunted, as he had grown tired of the eyes burning into the back of his head.

"Taking someone's life." Simon whispered into the dark room, and this prompted Soap into lifting his head off the pillow long enough to glance at Simon over his shoulder.

"I felt powerful." Soap whispered back just as quietly, and the words lingered in the cold air longer than they should have.

"Granted, I don't consider the lives I took to be people. They were monsters." Something in the way Soap growled the word made a knot form in Simon's stomach. A knot of sympathy, a knowing and an understanding. It wasn't the first time Soap had hinted at taking the life of an abuser, but Simon still wasn't sure of the relationship between Soap and his apparent abuser.

"Remember me telling you about the guy that I burned alive? How I shoved a poker through his chest so he couldn't get up?" Soap asked, and the quiet, almost shameful way he spoke sent a chill down Simon's spine.

"Yeah."

"We were partners. We'd been together for about four years by then. He had started hitting me a year prior. He got worse." Soap paused long enough to swallow past the knot forming in his throat, but Simon didn't mind. He knew the pain of having to recount your trauma to someone else.

"I was burning papers that had personal information. They were outdated by several years, and I needed to get rid of 'em. He came home drunk again. We started arguing and it got heated pretty fast. I remember feeling so fed up with his bullshit that when he got physical, I just saw red. I pushed him harder and he lost his balance. I don't even really remember grabbing the poker, if I'm being honest." Soap trailed off towards the end, but Simon couldn't form anything to say. What could he say to such a confession?

"I was happy though. Watching him burn felt good. Same thing I told the cops, same thing I told the judge. I did it, and I don't regret it."

"I'm sorry, Johnny." Simon breathed out, finding nothing else to convey everything he was feeling in the moment.

"'S fine, I guess. Fucked up by extending my sentence but, I don't regret killing those guards either." Soap stated rather matter-of-factly as he tried to cover a yawn. Simon's eyes widened as he stared at Soap, the other oblivious to his panic.

"You killed guards?"

"Aye. They were right bastards though. Kept using their power to hurt some of the prisoners in other wings. They knew better than to mess with us, but one day they fucked up. They got arrogant and fell for my trap." Soap had gotten quiet again, but this time his voice was filled with the call of sleep, yet Simon couldn't be more awake.

"Is that why the guards were all afraid of you?"

"Aye. It's how I got the name Soap, too." Soap mumbled, and the additional information only made Simon frown.

"How exactly?"

"Tied 'em up with their belts. Dislocated their jaws and shoved a bar of soap down each their throats. Held their nose so they couldn't breathe." Soap murmured, shifting so he sank further into the pillows.

"Yeh sure are askin' a lot of questions, Si." Soap said, a light chuckle accompanying his words. A blush burned at his ears, and for once, Simon was grateful for the dark.

"Guess I'm morbid like the rest of them." Simon mumbled back, and Soap only snorted.

"I think it's cause yeh like me." Simon blamed Soap's words on the effects of sleep, as the Scot was quick to begin softly snoring after the teasing words.

"G'night Johnny."

[gffa]

hey there! i don’t know if you’ve already been asked this already, but i just saw your post about ‘what’s the niche sw lore that you know back and front, mine’s the in-universe calendars and such, since they don’t know about yavin’

…and, like, oh my gosh. for the last couple months i’ve wanted to write a sort of long, backstory fic about mon before andor, and i’m… struggling, as i have absolutely no idea what to use as a marker for years and dates and such, especially since it isn’t the easiest thing to search on google, and bby isn’t something she would know about at the time.

if it‘s not too much trouble, where could i find out more about these in-universe calendars/could you explain it/them? as a new ish fic writer, i’d honestly be forever in your debt lol

Hi!  So, this sent me on a bit of another deep dive down some rabbit holes as best as I could and while I’ve covered Coruscant Reckoning Calendar years in this post, there is still a bit more I can offer. So, the thing about Star Wars lore is that there are multiple continuities and we, as fans, absolutely should take what we want from each of them or none of them, carve out the juicy bits, and measure what’s canon in our hearts.  But there’s a difference between what a given continuity/canon has taken into account versus that fans aren’t beholden to the same rules, so!  I suggest you just do what’s right for your fic, whether that’s sticking to the Andor continuity, mixing and matching, or rejecting it all to substitute your own worldbuilding. That said, here’s what The Clone Wars shows us: In the episode “Deception”, when Rako Hardeen is going back to his room, there are posters on the walls along the way, including one for a Sy Snootles concert:

Cleaned up image is from the trivia gallery on starwars.com.  Bottom row’s translation of Aurebesh translation from Wookiepedia: “FRI–SAT 12–4“ (Supposedly, there’s also a mention of “Fri” on a poster in the background of “Missing in Action”, but I haven’t found it and I’ve been down this rabbit hole long enough.  It’s another poster, though, so consider it in the same vein as this one.) WHICH MEANS:  They apparently use Mon / Tues / Wen / Thurs / Fri / Sat / Sun in the GFFA.  Are these abbreviations for “Friday” and “Saturday”?  Or is the GFFA version just “I’m going to a concert this Fri”?  (Supplementary material says “Friday”, including Rebel Journal by Ezra Bridger using the full word.) Probably it makes more sense to use “Friday” (posters abbreviating for space’s sake makes perfect sense), but I kinda like the twee-ness of “Fri”, it feels sufficiently ridiculous enough to be Star Wars.  I love when SW is ridiculous, okay!! So why do you see “Taungsday” or “Centaxday” in fic a lot?  Because there’s another calendar called “Galactic Standard Calendar” that was used in Legends and has been mentioned in Star Wars: Build the Millennium Falcon for Disney/Lucasfilm canon, but I would be super hesitant to call that hard canon. (Wookieepedia includes it, which I think is fair!  Just that I personally would not rely on such a source to be consistent with other SW media in the Disney/Lucasfilm continuity.  But it can be very useful if you’d rather go with the five-day week that the Galactic Standard Calendar establishes, though, it doesn’t match up with the posters we see in TCW.) One thing that’s going to cause a snarl:  If that “12–4 “ on the poster means 12/4 as in December 4th, then the way the dates are written is different from how they are on the C.R.C. post, which was “7956.901.3“ (which works out to be November 25th or October 27th, if you follow the math on that first linked post), so maybe they use both “329th day of the year” and “11–25″, “November 25th”. For a Mon story in particular, she’s from Chandrila, which is a Core World, so I would expect that she probably uses the C.R.C., especially given that she’s spent so much of her life on Coruscant from such a young age.  You can just write the numbers or you can use the days/months, if you want, pick whichever feels more natural for your story!  Or mix in the Galactic Standard Calendar info if you want, too!

[woodfrogs]

@arcaneyouth im mostly desensitized to it but whenever i think about it for a few seconds they all become so funny. the original trilogy has silly names but theyre mostly bangers. luke skywalker. biggs darklighter. wedge antilles. boba fett. then the prequels and everything else goes crazy with it. jocasta nu. mon mothma. oppo rancisis. dexter jettster. sly snootles. mace windu is just a normal name to me now (i also really like that you call him mr window bc he falls to his death after being thrown out of a window)

the villains are all ridiculous though. they just pick an evil sounding word and roll with it. plagueis. sidious. maul. savage oppress. (they did this with a jedi too and named her luminara unduli). and then you have the silly ones. pong krell. sheev palpatine. count dooku. watto. jabba. gardulla. sebulba. wilhuff tarkin <- he ordered the destruction of an entire planet and is one of the only canonically gay characters when a random stormtrooper killed by han solo in anh was retconned into his bf. also his full title + name is grand moff wilhuff tarkin

i also really really like the clone names bc they pick their own names. so you get normal ones (cody. jesse. gregor). kinda normal ones (kix. rex). and wild names (fives. dogma. waxer). all of these guys interact and also interact with like. anakin skywalker. BANGER name btw

but like. i saw this post talking about how the weird costuming and hairstyling of the original trilogy lend to the timeless fantasy of it. you dont look at any of the characters and go "oh thats so 70s." and i think the names being weird kinda do that too. either theyre super plain or super out there with no in between

also theres gonk droids

[musette-thornsong]

Star Wars: Ain’t I Good To You

We take you to the desert planet of Tattooine, where the days are hot and scorching while the nights are blistering and brutal. No signs of vegetational beauty whatsoever until that one day when it was blessed by one very special and exotic flower, Asari Rana Nightsinger. She had remained in obscurity for 12 years of her life (the last 3 on Tattooine) ever since her home planet Nozamir was taken over by the Takarouans (branch species of dragon-men) led by their leader General Kuathan. She had come to love her adopted life with the Skywalker family. But the night of her 17th birthday, Asari may encounter with a familiar face from her past that will change her life forever.

One-shot romantic comedy

Warning: Sensual comedy to be expected

Words: 1340

Asari, Calocir, Takarouans, Kuathan, & Planet Nozamir belongs to me

--

It was nighttime on the planet of Tattoine and everyone were sound asleep. The rest of the alien life on the planet were gathered at the new open-night club just a little way from the Skywalker residence. A Takarouan bounty hunter known as Lt. Calocir had been deployed by Takaroauan Gen. Kuathan to search the galaxy for the last surviving member of Nozamiran royal bloodline. His search had finally led to this planet at the night club and stopped to have a drink or two. He removed his helmet and sat a table near the stage not far from where the Dud, Sebulba, was sitting. The band announced the start of their next number with a new singer on the stage. Calocir looked up as the lights dimmed and the mysterious singer facing backward suddenly appeared on the rise-up of the stage.

Joh Yowza: Good evening, one and all. For our next number, we have a new face with us tonight. This is her first performance and she’s feeling a little nervous, so let’s show her some love. And now we present to you the most beautiful flower of the Max Rebo band, Miss Asari Nightsinger.

Sebulba: (whistled in anticipation)

Calocir: (squinted slightly in curiosity using his enhanced vision)

The band had begun a rather jazzy number recommended to them. Once the singer had turn around the moment the spotlight shined on her, Calocir was met with not just vision of human beauty but a familiar face from his past. The instant he saw a generic birthmark on her chest, he realized that Asari Nightsinger was actually the lost Nozamiran heir, Asari Rana. Never had he imagined that his target, the innocent child he knew growing up, would bloom into something so beautiful let alone fall right into his lap on a random planet.

Asari: (sensually walks down the rise-up to the microphone)

Sebulba: (lecherously) Beautiful

Calocir: (gazes up at Asari)

Asari had asked Shmi if she could check it out to celebrate her 17th birthday. Shmi granted her permission to go on the promise that she’d be safe. Once she got there, she was greeted warmly by all the alien and human species had come to know and adore her. She had been asked out of the blue by one of the band members, Joh Yowza, if she could take over for their original solo singer Sy Snootles (who come down with a rather nasty bug and a case of laryngitis). They had heard rumors of her serene voice from the times she would go the sanctioned orphanage and sing to the kids. Figuring she was helping a good cause, she agreed to assist them for their opening night. And now here she was, a rare and exotic commodity rivaled throughout the wasteland not just for her beauty and her mind but for the most angelic voice to ever grace the stage. She came to the microphone and started to sing.

Asari: (serenades) ♫ Love makes me treat you the way that I do ♫ (removes the microphone from the stand) ♫ Gee, baby, ain’t I good to you ♫

Calocir: (feels a warm tingling in his chest that he hadn’t felt in a long time)

Asari: (walks down the stage) ♫ There’s nothing too good for a boy that’s so true ♫ (walks towards the seated crowd in a flirtatious manner) ♫ Gee, baby, ain’t I good to yoooouu ♫ (comes first to the Troig, Fode & Beed, stroking her finger along Fode’s jawline) ♫ I bought you a Nexu for Boonta ♫ (playfully finger-taps Beed’s nose) ♫ A Corusca ring ♫

Calocir: (gulps rather intensely but subtly from feeling her overwhelming aura as she displayed such an affectionate demeanor)

Fode & Beed: (drops their heads to the table, swooning)

Asari: (slides down onto the Rodian, Greedo, leaning back against his shoulder before walking off) ♫ A Nightscreamer biiiike and everythiiiing ♫

Greedo: (gets goosebumps from feeling her smooth skin, ears wiggling excitedly)

Sebulba: (looks at her in a lecherous manner)

Calocir: (sees the look and preps his gun should the Dud try anything that compromised his mission)

Asari: ♫ Love makes me treat you the way that I do ♫ (gently swipes her hand under a Gamorrean guard’s chin)

Gamorrean Guard: (nearly stumbles out of his seat from being lost in her comet-green eyes and allured by her natural charm)

Calocir: (gets a better look at her in the spotlight and really observes her physical features)

Asari: ♫ Gee, baby, ain’t I good to you ♫ (leans up against a column) ♫ Love makes me treat you the way that I do ♫ (slides her hand the way down her frame sexily) ♫ Gee, baby, ain’t I good to you ♫

Sebulba: (jaw drops to the table, tongue hanging out, eyes bulge out like a crazy lovesick wolf)

Calocir: (eyes widened in amazement as his mouth hung open lost for words)

Asari: (glances and gestures at a random customer) ♫ There’s nothing too good for a man so true ♫ (shimmies slightly, pointing in their direction) ♫ Gee, honey, ain’t I good to you ♫

Sebulba: (heart pounds in and out erratically)

Calocir: (heart rate starts to pick up)

Asari: ♫ I know how to make good man happy ♫ (walks over to a pale male Twi’lek, Bib Fortuna, placing her hand on his bare lekku and shimmies a bit) ♫ I treat you right with lots of love just about every night ♫

Bib Fortuna: (bares a toothy grin)

Asari: (saunters over to a Swokes Swokes, Grognak) ♫ Love makes me treat you the way that I do ♫

Grognak: (pants like a dog)

Asari: (gives him a quick hip-show while stroking his chin, getting a little soulful) ♫ Gee, baby, ain’t I good to you ♫

Calocir was mesmerized with how bold and daring Asari was among some the most unscrupulous characters. She was not afraid to stare untold danger in the face and seemed very confident to the untrained eye. But he knew he had to keep his composure less his mission became compromised in any way. He was about to get up until Asari came him and sat on his lap in the middle of the instrumental. He was taken aback unable to move a bead of sweat ran along his scaly brow. She ran hand along the suit-cladded muscles, making Calocir go red as his eyes widened. She proceeded to slide her hand down his torso to his hip, pulling out his gun from the holster and serenaded him personally.

Asari: (sings soulfully while running the gun along Calocir’s jawline) ♫ I served you a gun-lit dinner and breakfast in bed ♫ (places the gun back in the holster, sliding her along his thigh and smiling) ♫ Took your ship to be serviced but your engine went dead ♫ (gets up and walks around behind him, harmonizing) ♫ Love makes me treat you the way that I do ♫

Calocir: (gulps in confusion at what just transpired)

Asari: (heads back towards the stage) ♫ Geeee, baby, ain’t I good to you ♫

Sebulba & Aliens: (off their metaphorical nuts and started howling like wolves and whistling like love-crazed maniacs) AAAAA-WOOOOO!!! OHOHOOOWOO-OO-OOOOO!!!

Asari: ♫ They got me paying credits from what I gave to you ♫ (points at Sebulba, marches back to the stairs where the lights suddenly shined, silhouetting her luscious frame as she swooped her arm into a glorious pose) ♫ Gee, baby, ain’t I good to yoooooooouu ♫

Calocir had lost all sense of common knowledge. The feelings he had buried since Kuathan’s betrayal and the death of his parents long ago were suddenly re-ignited for the second time in his life. And even more so, by the same person who gave him those feelings. His mission and loyalty to the general had become more than just a ruse, but thing f the past. Calocir could deny it no longer. He had fallen in love with the long-lost princess, Asari Rana.

[moodybidoof]

11 and 12

Thank you for the asks!! Sorry it took me like 5 hours to respond lol. Gonna answer about Clone Wars

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

Sy Snootles is a femme fatale queen and I love her. Qi'ra wants what Sy Snootles has - and tbh I can’t blame her bc I also would like to be a superstar singer, master spy, and just constantly rocking a tits out look.

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why

The fandom doesn’t like the The Battle of Mon Calamari arc because the fandom hates fun, apparently. I love Kit Fisto and also I will never forget the first time I saw the Karkarodon. The idea of a bunch of buff dudes who wage war not with weapons, but by biting people to death is so wild to me.

[liambaileyjournalism]

Back in January, I got in contact with Jerri Quinn, the manager of Mike Quinn regarding the possibility of interviewing him about his portrayal of one of my favourite Star Wars characters Nien Nunb. Here we are towards the end of March and the possibility of an interview became a reality. This has been an interview I was extremely excited to conduct and I am thrilled with the answers Mike Provided.

“Only you could have smuggled an entire rescue craft under the Empire’s noses.“―Princess Leia Organa, to Nien Nunb

Nien Nunb was a Sullustan male arms dealer and smuggler who joined the Alliance to Restore the Republic during the Galactic Civil War. Shortly after the Battle of Yavin, Nunb answered the call from his friend, Rebel pilot Evaan Verlaine, to help smuggle a group of Alderaanians off of Sullust while avoiding detection from the Galactic Empire; the Empire was searching for surviving Alderaanians after Death Star I blew up its first planet, Alderaan. He went on to further assist Verlaine and Princess Leia Organa in their mission to unite the surviving Alderaanians, during which time he helped Organa escape from potential Imperial captivity.

Only a few years later, Nunb became part of the Alliance Fleet and flew as the co-pilot for General Lando Calrissian aboard the Millennium Falcon during the Battle of Endor. Together, they fought against Imperial forces while attempting to destroy the Death Star II in orbit of the forest moon of Endor. Their battle was a success, and the Millennium Falcon fired the shot that destroyed the Death Star and delivered a devastating blow to the Galactic Empire. Three decades later, Nunb was a starfighter pilot with the military rank of Lieutenant Commander in the Resistance and fought in the cold war, including the Battle of Starkiller Base.

How did you get the role of Nien Nunb?

It was certainly unconventional the way this came about. I was hired as a general creature puppeteer on the movie and so went from creature to creature as needed as the movie progressed. Well about halfway through or so, I was hanging around Phil Tippett’s creature workshop at Elstree Studios. It was a small room up some stairs between Stages 8 and 9. Phil told me that this character had been chosen by George to become Lando’s co-pilot in some scenes in the Falcon cockpit. I assume because Chewie was busy he wanted Lando to have an interesting counterpart.

Nien was purely a background extra at this time. His mask was static with no moving parts on it at all. But the problem was that George wanted him to have dialogue. So Phil was thinking maybe they could put an oxygen mask over his mouth to hide the fact it didn’t move and maybe put air bladders in his cheeks to give him some life. I remember thinking that might not be so great. I could see if I put my hand inside I could sort of make his mouth move. I suggested to Phil perhaps he could be modified into a large hand puppet. He really liked that idea and suggested I modify one of the two masks into a temporary puppet to show George. So I “puppetised” the head so I could work it just like a large Muppet.

About a week later we shot a film test, directed by George with my puppet next to the extra in the masked version. He took us through assorted turns and reactions. I was able to wiggle his nose and suggested he could have eye blinks added. Also, I placed my finger behind his ear and made it wiggle, Stan Laurel style! Well, George loved what he saw and immediately asked how soon it could be mechanized and ready? Stuart Ziff who was coordinated stated about two weeks.

So off he went back to ILM California with Nien to be modified. Sure enough, he returned with mechanisms and all, just considerable heavier. Next thing I knew, I’d landed myself the job of the main performer for the new Nien in the scenes. So I guess I made myself the opportunity and it somehow worked out. Those fateful moments changed my life forever! I even wrote and spoke my own dialogue in English for reference on the shoot. The now-famous nod and laugh were just things I added that I had learned from my time with Muppets. That is now a big part of what fans enjoy about him now. I love that!

How did you get into Puppeteering and can you describe what it entails for people who are unsure about what it is?

I was always into puppets as far back as I can recall. They were always on TV when I was little, mostly as glove and string puppets. I used to move my teddy bear as though he were a puppet so I could bring him to life. When I was about eight years old I had a glove puppet show in a small booth that I would perform in park talent shows and auditions. I wasn’t much good but the spark was certainly there and I had fun with it.

So I wasn’t until The Muppet Show came along in 1976 that my spark for puppetry was fanned and the sparks became large flames. As Muppet Show was taped not too far from where I lived (coincidence?), I used to visit the set regularly on guest star days, so they got to know me. Eventually, I left school, asked for a job and I think Jim Henson took pity on me. Saw I was always hanging around he might as well give me a job, haha! This was just as they transitioned from the end of The Muppet Show to film The Great Muppet Caper at the film studio across the street.

The second part of the question is what does puppetry entail? It’s a lot harder than anyone would think. Besides the obvious holding your arm above your head thing, you also have the weight of the puppet, you have to watch your performance and framing on a monitor (which is reversed from a mirror so when you move the puppet to the left, on the monitor it moves to the right. That really messes with your head).

You also must be able to communicate thoughts very clearly and simply through the puppet, be able to act, speak, sometimes sing, step over cables and boxes in mid-performance. Remember lines and even improvise at times too. It’s a bit like being a musician, to where you don’t want to worry about the technical side of how to play the instrument but to be able to enjoy the performing of it. Yet you are also like a dancer, using kinetic movement efficiently to portray emotion. To stand out as a puppeteer, you have to work hard and excel. If not, you are doing the audience a disservice. So it’s very physical but also requires mental gymnastics at times.

You also performed other characters like Ree Yees, Admiral Ackbar, and Yoda amongst others, how did you get involved with these?

Ree Yees was probably the first creature I performed on Return Of The Jedi because we filmed in Jabba’s palace first. I never auditioned. I was just given the hand puppet close up to work and that was it. He had jaw and lip movement and eye blinks. He was very heavy so we created a pole that went from the body to a hip harness. My left hand was on the head turning it and my right worked the cable controls. There was also a full-length version of him, performed by Paul Springer which just like the costume version of Nien, had no facial articulation. So Paul and I worked together on scened in case we had to duplicate the action with both versions.

Mike Quinn & Tim Rose Working on Admiral Ackbar

Mike Quinn Working on Sy Snootles

There was also a scene in Jabba’s sail barge where there was an argument over drinks but it was cut from the final movie. Still exist for that though. Ackbar and Sy Snootles were handled by Tim Rose, who was involved in developing them during his time at ILM. So I became his assistant. For Snootles, I worked strings from above for the wide shots and the singing lips on cable control for the close-ups. For Ackbar, I worked his mouth on cables for the wide shots and his eyes and lids on cables for the close-ups.

Yoda was a real gift. I was a big fan of Yoda in Empire Strikes Back while I was still at school. I have already assisted Frank Oz being the right hand for Miss Piggy and Fozzie Bear. So this really was the same gig, working for Yoda’s right hand. I was small for fitting next to him under that tiny set and Frank knew my work. So he just requested me and that was it. It was a real joy though.

Mike Quinn (Nien Nunb) & Frank Oz (Yoda).

Can you describe your time filming scenes?

For all the Star Wars movies, it has always been such a blast! A real rush from start to finish, whether it’s ROTJ or the new movies decades later. I’m often among the first to arrive and the last to leave. Perhaps that tells you something of my passion and love for performing and being on set? Also, I love working with the great cast and crew. They are all so lovely and talented and many have become good friends. So when a project comes to an end, it’s always heartbreaking because the family has to split up. It has always been this way but you would think I would be used to that by now?

As far as working on set and filming goes, there’s a huge feeling of gratitude and responsibility. You know you are creating something that will be viewed and dissected frame by frame for generations to come. Long after I’m gone in fact. So I try to not let that cripple me and just enjoy the process. Sometimes I’ll just stand there in-between setups with the Nien head off and just look around and soak it all in. I want to remember the moment and that feeling. There’s nothing like it I tell ya!

What was it like being on board the Millennium Falcon?

“Nunb can fly anything, in any conditions.“―Gial Ackbar

Well, she may not look like much but she’s got it where it counts. The Falcon is so iconic and my favourite ship of all time. So jumping into Chewie’s seat was quite intimidating for this teenager. I was actually still 17 years of age at the time of filming. They had to cut out the seat part of the chair and were very concerned that it was necessary for me to fit in there as they told me they were 1973 race car seats and couldn’t replace them. So I lay flat on my back, wore a microphone and had a six-inch black and white monitor on my chest so I should see what the camera saw. The cockpit was detached and on a rocking gimbal so Stagehands could roll it around. For me it was a bit like being in the hull of a boat at sea and unable to watch the horizon, so I actually got quite queasy in there.

Returning to the Falcon again in The Last Jedi, after over three decades was just wild! Standing there with what remained of the principle cast near me was quite surreal. It was lovely watching Carrie and Daisy sing together in-between takes. Rian Johnson placed Finn and Nien together and John Boyega was quite excited to have a little moment with Nien as he told me he played as Nien in Battlefront. We just improvised some stuff for that scene, so I made it my mission to say stupid things to him to try and crack him up (which I managed a couple of times). I consider that a well earned perk of being a “legacy” character!

What was the make-up and costume process like for these films?

Well for ROTJ, Phil Tippett had to lower Nien onto me through the Falcon window. My left hand was in his head and my right hand was in his right hand, holding the steering yoke. His left hand was stuffed and fixed onto the other side of the yoke. The puppet was pretty heavy and I had to sustain his performance for several minutes at a time. However, his weight I think was a blessing visually because it kept him grounded and forced me to keep him real and not too puppet-like. Perhaps that’s why most people seem surprised when they hear that and thought he was a guy in a costume? I should take that as a compliment I guess, even though the technology wouldn’t have been available to do it at that time.

Nien Nunb Puppet for the Original Trilogy.

For the new movies, I can now wear Nien as a fully self-contained costume. He was made to fit me perfectly and the head was made from a life cast of my head and shoulders. It takes two people usually to get me dressed into him, a wardrobe person and a creature shop person. We can usually do it within 10 minutes or so. I look through the eyes but they fog up very fast as I generate lots of heat and moisture during takes. Nothing I try seems to really help so they have to come in and blow cold air into the mouth hole in-between takes, which helps cool me down as well as clears out the vision for my eyes. After about two minutes I’m virtually blind in there, so I fall over a lot.

On both movies so far I’ve fallen over, I hope we don’t go for three. In the first movie, I fell onto BB8 outside the Falcon on location and broke his antenna. It was a sort of slow-motion fall, so I was ok. But my only thought was to not damage the head! In the Last Jedi, Anthony Daniels and I had just had a fun conversation about falling over in our costumes and the many times he had fallen in his over the years. Well, not a few hours later I was running through the twisting salt mine tunnels in near darkness, proudly sporting a suitably large rebel blaster when for this one take my foot encountered a boulder and down I went hard and fast! Again my thought was “don’t break the blaster or the head!”. It was a split second before I knew I was on the ground and in agony from the impact to my knee. It was the final arrival at the Crystal Fox exit. C3PO was directly in front of me and behind was Rose on the stretcher. I blew the take and we all had to reset. We got it on the next take thankfully. I felt bad but everyone understood.

After filming had wrapped and I returned home, my chiropractor had told me I’d put my knee and right thumb out when I hit the ground. It wasn’t until a week or two later I had trouble walking. I suspect I came close to breaking it but the bone sure was bruised. at least I can say I do all my own stunts now, even if they aren’t in the script!

Was there much interaction between yourself and the directors, if so, what sort of things would you discuss?

Well, the way I see it, if the Directors aren’t giving me lots of direction then I’m doing okay. As George Lucas directed the Falcon scenes himself in ROTJ, I had him approve my guide dialogue I pencilled into my script. That was it for those scenes. Other then one of the camera operators telling me to watch my head doesn’t go out of frame in one of the closeup cameras, that was it for that movie.

On The Force Awakens, I was given blocking and filled in the rest myself. JJ wanted to save a spot in the movie for Nien Nunb’s reveal, as a gift to the fans. That was the shot of him striding out of the base entrance toward the X-Wing as the camera dollies left. The only thing was we had already seen him inside the resistance base earlier but I was happy he wanted to give us that moment.

In the X-Wing scenes, we just made stuff up pretty well and did a bunch of assorted looks, reactions and talking. It was all quite random but we knew they would just take it in pieces anyway. We never finished a full take as with all the shaking around in the simulator my battery pack connector separated, thus killing power to the head. So what you see in the movie were parts a single half take, no rehearsal or anything.

We were to shoot more scenes in the X-Wing for the dark environment, which is the second part of the Starkiller base battle. However, they were wrapping a lot of principle actors that day and my scenes were to be the last ones to shoot. They ran out of time and JJ came over from the other set and apologized profusely to me, which was very sweet. He was great fun on set and had a great energy. On The Last Jedi, Rian Johnson made a point to one over to me and thank me during my first scene, which was the one with Laura Dern. He was a delight and the crew just loved him. Very approachable. So I knew it would be okay to go up to him and ask for a blaster in the salt mine scenes, to which of course he obliged.

What are some of the main differences between filming for the original trilogy, and the sequel trilogy?

Surprisingly little. Mostly the technology has changed. I think film stock is more advanced. Lighting is a lot cooler and more subtle, probably due to the sensitivity of the cameras and everything now. But for everything else, it’s kind of the same. Hundreds of extras in costume, practical sets and ships. Detailed props. It’s amazing how similar it all is 35 years later. The food is actually better now, haha! There are even coffee trucks outside the stages. Wonderful stuff!

You have been in three of the Star Wars films now, what were the atmospheres like for them individually and was there one you enjoyed more than the others?

Hmmm.. well for ROTJ I was coming in as a huge fan of the first two movies, so it was an amazing thrill to watch the third movie unfold in front of my eyes with all the familiar beloved characters and costumes. Coming back over 30 years later was a wonderful gift. A very surreal one. Now the new actors would recognize Nien Nunb and were amazed when they would learn it was me who played him in the Falcon too. I guess they just figured everyone was pretty well retired or dead by now, heh! I can’t really say that one was more enjoyable than the others because they were each different. However, the more scenes I get to play in and the more sets I walk on, the happier I am. I’ve made new friends in the new movies too which is really lovely.

Nien Nunb managed to survive The Last Jedi whereas Admiral Ackbar was killed during an attack by the first order, how does it feel knowing that Nien Nunb is one of only a few characters from the original trilogy that is still alive?

Yes, it was quite the buzz arriving for the shoot and hearing that poor old Ackbar was a gonna. Some of the puppeteers thought I might be too but were too afraid to tell me. Happily, they were wrong. Once I was on the Falcon I knew I was safe! I think Rian Johnson said there were something like 20 Resistance characters left? That probably includes Droids. That’s just wild. I’m almost convinced the only reason I’m still alive is that they kept forgetting to kill me off…..But I’m thrilled beyond belief because I get to return to the Falcon again after all this time. Now they will have to give me more to do on the next one right? There’s hardly anyone left!

What was it like working alongside Billy Dee Williams in Return of the Jedi?

“Don’t worry. My friend’s down there. He’ll have that shield down on time. Or this’ll be the shortest offensive of all time.“―Lando Calrissian, assuaging Nunb’s concerns about the Battle of Endor.

He was a delight and really put me at ease. It can’t have been easy for him having to talk to a chatty rubber head. But we would converse in-between scenes and have remained friends with mutual respect ever since. It’s funny how those few minutes of scenes created a tie between us for the rest of our lives. I always enjoy seeing him at conventions and he’s always so gracious.

Who are some of your favourite characters from the franchise and why?

Yoda became the big deal for me in Empire Strikes Back. Partly because he’s a magical puppet (the first of his kind actually) and partly because when his scenes came on, there would be a hush in the cinema as everyone was so mesmerized by him. I think Yoda and Ben Kenobi are two of the most complex and interesting characters in this galaxy. But I may also have to say the Millennium Falcon is also a favourite character of mine. It is just so iconic and vital to each movie. I love that thing to bits! It has also changed my life by way of Nien Nunb.

What does Star Wars mean to you?

Star Wars means so much more to me now all these decades later. It’s not just a movie franchise. It represents hope, that some things are worth fighting for and it has brought so many people together, young and old and it is global. Star Wars to me is like a Genie that’s been let out of the bottle and keeps granting my wishes. I shall never take any of it for granted ever.

How does it feel knowing there are figurines of your characters?

I remember the very first time I saw the Nien figure hanging on a peg in a store. It was really weird and exciting. Now the current figure is actually from a 3D scan of me in the costume so it’s a much more literal version of me and my proportions and everything. It’s really a mini-me, rather than an artistic interpretation. Hundred have been calling for a Black Series figure so that hopefully will be happening eventually. There is a Hot Wheels car based on him too, which pleases the 7-year-old boy in me to no end!

You attend many comic conventions, what does fan interaction mean to you, and do you have any appearances coming up?

My appearances seem to come and go depending upon work. There was a time where I had all but retired from them. I do have new people working as agents for me now and that helping. I really enjoy doing them and meeting people. Its the only time I really get to hear what people think of the character. Had I not gone to shows I never would have known Nien’s little nodding laugh was a thing. So now it’s my mission to bring that back and get it in somewhere one last time for the fans. So now fans have a voice and can feed back into the movies. I think that’s so cool! I love connecting the dots and making it real for the fans and not so abstract.

As long as it’s fun, I will always try to fit in conventions. I’ve made so many new friends along the way. Also, they can be a great way to catch up with old friends and co-workers. So it’s a win/win really. I’ve been so fortunate. Now I always enjoy doing panels and Q&A sessions too. So I’m gradually getting ramped up with shows for the year here in the USA and the UK and hopefully a few other countries. But many depend upon work and things are going to get busy again as the year wears on.

Speaking of that continuity from screen to fans, I’m also developing my Secrets Of Puppetry Academy for film and television puppetry. It’s an online detailed training course that takes people from novice right up to expert if they so choose. It’s the first of its kind and I’m using all the things bought to me directly by Jim Henson, Frank Oz and the rest of the Muppet performers. People can find it at SecretsOfPuppetry.com

I would like to say a huge thank you to both Mike and Jerri for making this dream of mine a reality. Nien Nunb has been a favourite of mine for a very long time and to know that I have interviewed the man behind the mask makes it so much better.

Be sure to check out Mike’s puppeteering workshop page at: http://secretsofpuppetry.com/ and give him a like on all social media.

We all look forward to seeing Mike reprise his role as Nien Nunb in Star Wars Episode IX when it hits the cinemas in 2019 until then, may the force be with you!

"Only you could have smuggled an entire rescue craft under the Empire's noses."―Princess Leia Organa, to Nien Nunb Back in January, I got in contact with Jerri Quinn, the manager of Mike Quinn regarding the possibility of interviewing him about his portrayal of one of my favourite Star Wars characters Nien Nunb.

[arwenkenobi48]

~Imperial Diaries~ Episode 9: Waiting For Repairs

@animperialmarch Part 9. Slavin and Linus (OC) have to spend a day on Coruscant after their shuttle crashes.

Cue Music: Don’t Stop Believing - Journey

Dear diary,

My colleague Captain Slavin and I both got into a bit of a scrape today, concerning my command shuttle. We had just received a new assignment from Grand Admiral Thrawn and were on our way to the Chimera, when I decided to let Slavin do the driving. This would be considered a rather dumb move on my part (especially after Slavin almost died in a mysterious AT-DP related incident) but I figured that nothing could go wrong with such a clear course.

This turned out to be a terrible mistake, because as I noticed we were already taking a slightly wrong turn and heading towards the Kessel Run, there was a loud crashing, fizzing noise, followed by a tremor and an alarm blaring. The ship swerved to the left slightly and Slavin fell out of the pilot seat. “Ow!” He yelped. “What’s going on?”

“Marco, this is the last time I let you drive!” I groaned. Checking the computer, I gasped in terror. “We’ve lost the starboard engine!” “How?” Slavin asked. “Something’s caught in the machine. Looks like a Mynock or some other life form.” I gritted my teeth. “We’re gonna have to make an unscheduled stop.” 

And sure enough, we did. The nearest planet just happened to be Coruscant, so that was where we went. I swore to mysef that that was the last time I would let Slavin drive. I just about managed to land the shuttle, albeit in a rather wobbly way, outside a repair garage where a cute Theelin mechanic was working.

When she saw the state of the shuttle, the mechanic’s jaw dropped. “Holy smokes!” She exclaimed. “What did you do to the engine on that thing!?” “We didn’t do anything to the engine!” Slavin snottily replied. “We just used it to make a Mynock smoothie!” 

“How long are the repairs gonna take?” I asked, ignoring Slavin’s sarcastic comment. “Ah, it’ll probably take, say, 48 hours,” shrugged the mechanic. “48 hours!?” I shrieked. “No, 4 to 8 hours,” she replied. “So we’re stuck here until it’s fixed!? Great!” Slavin groaned. “Sorry, Marco,” I sighed. “Looks like we’ll have to stay on Coruscant all day.” 

So we decided we’d contact Thrawn and tell him everything. He actually took it better than I thought. “Very well, Captain.” He said. “The important thing is no one got hurt. Aside from the Mynock. You may return as soon as your shuttle is repaired.” “Understood, sir,” I said. Then, turning to Slavin: “Well, Marco, we’ve got some time to kill. Let’s go and see the sights, shall we?”

And that was how we ended up spending a day trip in Coruscant. Slavin, who’d spent his whole life there before joining the Empire, wasn’t all that enthusiastic. As far as he was concerned, it was old news. I, on the other hand, enjoyed every minute of it. The cityscape was simply breathtaking. The hum of speeders overhead and overlapping conversations in the crowds were like music to my ears. I’m so used to the quiet of the Empire and my own home planet that this was literally a whole new world to me. Had I a camera, I would have taken photos of every marvellous sight that met my eyes. 

I regret to say that our behaviour became a little unprofessional as time passed. Upon entering a cantina, Slavin immediately challenged me to a drinking contest. I tried to remind him that we had to keep our wits about us if we were to get the ship back to Thrawn, but all he said, indicating a glass of Vodka, was: “Ah, too strong for you, is it, Linus?” 

An hour or so later, we were both completely drunk. Slavin actually strutted up onto the stage where the Max Rebo band happened to be performing and the next thing I knew, he was dancing the tango with Pa’lowick singer Sy Snootles! I, on the other hand, ended up flirting with a droid under the impression that it was a Twi’lek girl! If any other Imperial personnel had seen us, neither I nor Slavin would have heard the end of it.

Eventually, after we’d both sobered up - and we both had terrible headaches from the alcohol - we returned to the repair shop and found the shuttle in tip-top condition. It honestly looked as good as new! “Thank you, ma’am,” I said as I payed the mechanic. “I really owe you one,” “No problem, sir,” She replied with a wink. “Might wanna avoid Mynocks from now on, right?”

I said that I would, and we left the glittering world of Coruscant behind us and returned to the Chimera. Whatever tomorrow may bring, I’m sticking with my resolution: I’m never letting Captain Slavin drive my ship ever again!

Signed, Captain Linus Hawkins

[samanthasroberts]

Jar Jar Binks, Watto and more most annoying things in the Star Wars universe

Jar Jar Binks

Image: starwars.com

Weve been through a lot together, Star Wars fans, from pod-racing to Kylo Rens lightsaber. We’ve dealt with Liam Neesons luxurious hair and Ewan McGregors luxurious hair and Harrison Fords luxurious hair and Adam Drivers luxurious hair.

While most of the journey has been an exciting trip to a world we wished we lived in, there are some notable pain points hate-inducing enough to make even the most loyal of fans curse George Lucas name. Whoose you thinksa Im talking aboutsa?

SEE ALSO: ‘Rogue One’ director justifies reshoots: ‘Star Wars has to be fantastic’

Below, 13 of the most annoying things about Star Wars.

13. Baby Boba Fett

This one tops a lot of lists of worst Star Wars characters, but it’s only because adult Boba Fett is so universally adored. Maybe its the unexciting revelation that he’s a clone of Jango Fett, the Mandalorian warrior who is also cloned for the aptly named Clone Army, that upsets people, or its that their favorite character is unveiled as a dumb kid who spends most of his scenes glaring and silently brooding. He might as well not have been there and maybe it would have been better that way. The mystery was one of the most alluring aspects of Boba Fett to begin with.

12. Ewoks

This is a touchy one. For the record, I do not have a problem with Ewoks. I also, since ceasing to be a 7-year-old kid, see how they could upset some people. Leia meets an animate teddy bear in the woods who threatens her and then immediately needs her help walking through the woods hes supposedly lived in his whole life. Its a stretch for us to believe that this species would have made it through the evolutionary wringer, let alone take down a legion of the most trained, feared and technologically advanced military in the galaxy.

SEE ALSO: Here’s how the ‘Star Wars’ droids could help you survive the holidays

11. Luke Skywalkers Maturity Level

When you watch A New Hope as a kid, Luke Skywalker is your hero. When you watch it again as an adult, you realize, Oh, wow, this guy is a kid.

At the storys beginning, Luke Skywalker is 16 and he acts like it, whining about chores and wishing he could instead go to Tosche station to get power converters. The first thing he does upon entering the Millennium Falcon is moan about what a piece of junk it is. He then interrupts the adults to scream, WHATS THAT FLASHING THING?! while trying to press all the blinking buttons on its dashboard like a spoiled toddler. Luckily for us, and the series, Luke grows up.

10. Nute Gunray

Image: starwars.com

The Neimoidian Viceroy of the Trade Federation and Separatist leader is cowardly, dumb and boring, all the while boasting an offensive Asian accent. Gunray is so bafflingly useless and obviously two-faced, the intelligence of all characters who trust him is immediately suspect. We would rejoice when Darth Sidious orders the newly named Darth Vader to do away with the Viceroy and his buds, but honestly we keep forgetting he exists each time he exits the screen.

9. Boss Nass

Gungans are already hard to love. So when their leader rolls in refusing to cooperate with our heroes and spraying saliva like a bad Richard Nixon impression, its especially hard to get on board. Maybe fans would have hated him less if the good Gungan name hadnt already been soured for so many by a certain Mr. Jar Jar of Binks.

8. Padawan Braid

Image: composite, all photos by starwars.com

George Lucas can call them Padawan braids, a symbol of rank in the Jedi training, but we all know what they are: rat-tails. Its tough to associate the single, long, skinny braid with the calm and enlightened Jedi order when so many of us associate it with that kid down the street who tried to steal beer out of peoples garages. Give us a bearded and long-haired Obi Wan, or No-bi Wan, please.

7. Sy Snootles and the Max Rebo Band

Barf. Barf. Barf. George Lucas claimed he always wished this musical interlude at Jabbas palace in Return of the Jedi could have been an extended sequence, and in 2000, the extreme hubris of the digitally remastered versions gave him his chance. The new CGI iteration of Sy Snootles, lead singer of the Max Rebo band, turned a strange but charming alien into an uncomfortably sexual one. It even threw in some anachronistic backup singers for good measure, along with a loud creature named Joh Yowza screaming in huttese directly into the camera. The tone is completely wrong for the setting, and frankly, its hard to watch. Even more cringe-worthy? The new song theyre singing is called Jedi Rocks. Woof.

6. Young Anakin

You know, maybe the character of Anakin Skywalker was doomed to fail. Maybe nothing could have ever matched our expectations. Darth Vader had been too perfect. He was the baddest baddie we had ever seen, how could his backstory ever have lived up to his future? Or maybe its that George Lucas has seemingly never interacted with a child, so for research, he watched Dennis the Menace and Leave it to Beaver and wrote down a few one-liners before calling it quits so he could spend more time planning Jar Jar Binks hijinks.

The resulting Little Ani is a cloyingly innocent 1950s cartoon character, practically on the verge of saying, Gee Whiz, Mister Qui-Gon! in every scene. Any evidence of his future capacity for deep emotion, any whispers of darkness that might be hidden in his heart, any foreshadowing of the towering villain he is to become is deafeningly absent.

When we saw Voldemorts childhood, we saw the events that led him to mature into an evil mass murderer and it enriched our fear of the villain, making it more confusing, more real. When we saw Darth Vaders childhood, we saw a bunch of lame jokes, a plain personality and pod-racing.

5. Jabba the Hutts Tongue

OH GOD. OH GOD NO. PUT IT BACK. PUT IT BACK IN YOUR MOUTH. I CANT LOOK. SOMEONE TELL ME WHEN ITS OVER. IM PUKING. IM PUKING RIGHT NOW.

4. Watto

Image: starwars.com

There is nothing to love about Watto. Hes a slave owner. He constantly flies around on flimsy wings that couldnt possibly support his bulbous, lazy body. Hes smarmy, arrogant and unintelligent. Oh, and hes a monstrously racist stereotype. Greedy, slimy, with a large nose and a middle-eastern accent, Watto feels like every false anti-semitic caricature come to life. The Toydarian junk-dealer takes up way too much space in The Phantom Menace, and honestly, his body looks so fragile its a shock that none of his slaves swatted him to finish him off. I know plenty of fans who are up to the job.

3. Cheesy Dialogue

Now that Im with you again, Im in agony. My heart is beating hoping that a kiss will not become a scar. Love wont save you, Padme. Only my new powers can do that. The Force runs strong in my family. My father has it. I have it. And… my sister has it. Yes. It’s you, Leia.

Groaaaaaan. Look. George Lucas. Its OK. We all need an editor. Use one.

2. Midi-chlorians

The biggest knife in the back to die-hard Star Wars fans? The introduction of midi-chlorians in The Phantom Menace, answering the enormous question that no one was asking: How does the Force work? Qui-Gon tells us that midi-chlorians are little, microscopic life forms, living inside of cells that are the conduit for the Force.

The thing is, we already had an explanation for the Force from Obi Wan in A New Hope. Retroactively adding details about microscopic life forms living in your body doesnt totally fit with Obi Wans explanation, making our image of the Force messier instead of clearer. Midi-chlorians reduce a beautiful cosmic connection to something physical and less cool. Instead of expanding the Force, they narrow it. People have been frozen in carbonite for less heinous crimes.

1. Jar Jar Binks

Image: starwars.com

While many of the above offenders may be worse than the most notorious Gungan, nobody could take home the gold without me receiving a flood of death threats, so here you go! The worst part about Star Wars is Jar Jar Binks.

Jar Jars biggest crime is over-exposure. Maybe a measured amount of meesa so dumb dumb moments, executed with surgical precision would have, in fact, been a welcome distraction from an otherwise boring plot. Unfortunately, well never know Jar Jar Binks as anything other than the bumbling moron who pretty much laid out the red carpet for Palpatine to take over the Senate.

Kids loved him. Adults wanted to rip their eyeballs out of their skulls and shove them deep into their eardrums to keep from ever hearing him again. Intended to be lovable, actually unbearable, Jar Jar Binks blows and thats all there is to it.

BONUS: ‘Rogue One: A Star Wars Story’ reimagined as a homemade trailer

Source: http://allofbeer.com/2017/12/04/jar-jar-binks-watto-and-more-most-annoying-things-in-the-star-wars-universe/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2017/12/04/jar-jar-binks-watto-and-more-most-annoying-things-in-the-star-wars-universe/

[freesia-writes]

For the celebration: 17 and Tup!! Thinking about that sweet soft boy today, I wanna hold him, I get so worried for him ;;; @fives-girlfriend

Oooooo baby. I was excited for this one!

#17 - "Don't ever do that again! You have no idea what it does to me…"

Tup x Reader (I think GN but correct me if I missed anything) Word Count: 3.6k Content Warnings: drinkin and kissin. Apparently all I write, LOL.

“Come on, Tup. It’ll be awesome!” Hardcase exclaimed, clapping him on the back with enough enthusiasm to nearly knock him off his bench. 

“Yeah, they’ve never done this at 79s before!” Fives added, and even Dogma nodded vigorously through his mouthful of food. 

“I know, it’s just…” Tup began, but Jesse’s arrival, accompanied with a loud “who’s ready to party tonight?!” drowned out the rest of his reply. 

It was the talk of the mess hall -- Sy Snootles was coming to perform at 79s, and she was bringing along an infamous troupe of Twi’lek dancers, supposedly heralded throughout the galaxy as some of the most luscious and lascivious one could encounter. The clones who were lucky enough to be on Coruscant were undoubtedly excited, as they were rarely considered deserving of such luxuries. A few squads were planning to attend, the 501st being one of them, as you had heard on your lunch break. 

You worked with them frequently when they were on world, providing armor improvements, repairs, and tune-ups beyond what they would do for regular inspections. You were part of a small team that scuttled from armory to armory, equipping troopers with updated devices and outfitting new squads. The 501st boys were some of your favorites, having enough personality among them for the entire GAR. One in particular had always held a soft spot in your heart, with his unassuming demeanor and quiet insight. You’d chatted with him often while going over various armor components, and the stories he’d shared about the horrors of Umbara had broken your heart for him. He’d formed strong bonds with his brothers, especially after enduring that nightmare, and you’d felt your affection growing as you saw him grow from a fresh little rookie to a skilled negotiator, brave soldier, and man of strong convictions. 

If you were honest, he’d grown on you a lot. You found yourself daydreaming, during slow hours, of slowly freeing his hair from its neat little bun, running your fingers through it, and tracing your lips across his cheek to the little teardrop tattoo beneath his eye. But you’d also become close friends, and you were fairly certain that was the extent of his perspective and feelings toward you. There was an intimacy and familiarity between you that had been established as he’d shared some of his most vulnerable moments and harrowing experiences while you’d listened quietly, patting his hand and offering empathetic platitudes that couldn’t begin to match the magnitude of what he had been through. At some point, it had grown into more than just fondness, you’d realized, and it resulted in a simmering attraction that burned in your chest whenever you saw him. 

So when you found him at the back of the cluster of troopers waiting for the lift after lunch, and he caught sight of you as you approached him from the side, it sent a little shiver of tingles down your spine at the small smile that curved across his face. 

“CT-5385,” you said quietly, giving him a solemn salute that earned you an eyeroll as he looped his arm across your shoulders, pulling you into a warm side hug. 

“Cut it out,” he commanded, dropping his arm as you filtered into the crowded lift. “You heard all the fuss about 79s tonight?” he asked, barely audible over the rest of the chatter in the small space. 

“I did. You going?” you asked, feeling a sudden whirlwind of mixed emotions at it. 

“I’m not really feeling it, but it doesn’t sound like I have a choice,” Tup answered, shrugging and tipping his head toward his fellow blue-striped 501st brothers. 

“I can call you in for an emergency armor upgrade if you’d like,” you offered, to which he chuckled and shook his head. 

“Why don’t you just come?” he asked, looking up at you with those large honey-brown eyes. “It would make it a lot more bearable, that’s for sure.”

Your heart skipped a beat, wondering if he did have feelings for you after all, or if it was just the simple statement of one enjoying the company of a friend. You couldn’t help but smile, though, and tried to angle your face away from the light as you felt your cheeks grow slightly warm as you wondered about his affections. 

“I will if you will,” you said, resuming your light and airy attitude as the lift doors whooshed open. 

“Game on,” he declared, giving you the cheesiest finger guns you’d ever seen, promptly cringing at it, shrugging, and pulling his helmet on as he trotted off after his squad. 

“It’s a date?” you whispered under your breath as he disappeared around the corner.

* * * 

79s was packed to the brim, and clusters of troopers spilled out onto the streets all around it. The atmosphere was infectiously exciting, as though the entire world were on pause and tonight was a chance to escape it all for a few hours. There were three times as many food carts as usual, as the local vendors were quick to pick up on any chance for some extra business, and the entire block seemed like a party in itself. You started to feel anxious and out of place, as this wasn’t usually your thing. It had been something you and Tup had bonded over from the start -- a preference for more quiet, intellectual, serene spaces as opposed to the vibrant party scenes that more of the troopers opted for. 

You adjusted your outfit, feeling slightly self-conscious as it was decidedly more fitted and flattering than your simple work jumpsuit. You realized you had never really seen Tup in a more informal setting, as your interactions were primarily in the mess hall, the armory, or the barracks. All the questions and doubts began to swirl in your mind, amplified by the booming music that assaulted you as soon as you pushed your way into 79s. Heading straight for the bar and downing a double shot of liquid courage before you even looked around, you wiped your mouth on the back of your hand, returning the glass to the countertop and scanning the room for familiar faces.

“You’re off to an ambitious start,” came a smooth voice from behind you. “Lookin to stir up some trouble? Give those Twi’leks some competition?” You smirked, turning to face Fives, whose presence could be felt as much as heard. His boisterousness and joviality always brought a smile to your face, and you admired his ability to channel that even after his harrowing experiences at war. 

“Oh, you know me…” you said, shrugging as you felt the tingly burn down your throat, warming your chest. “Where are the rest of the boys?”

“Upstairs, for now. Lost a fight with the 212th for the table by the stage, but we’re plotting our revenge,” Fives said with a conspiratorial wink as he jerked his head toward the stairs, motioning you to come along. There was something different about tonight, whether it was the setting or the occasion or some strange alignment of the stars, and you just felt an apprehensive prickle down your spine, as though something were about to happen. You ordered another double shot, taking it with you as you trotted up the stairs after Fives. 

A couple whistles and hoots met you as you reached the top of the stairs, and you grinned bashfully as Hardcase and Jesse catcalled you while Fives announced your presence. It felt like being welcomed home, as cheesy as that sounded in your own head, with the kind familiarity and brotherly acceptance they always had for you. Hopefully not TOO brotherly… for all of them at least… Your eyes roved across their faces, finding the one that made your heart flutter. Tup was crushed in the corner of the booth, mercilessly squeezed between Hardcase and Dogma, arms pushed into his sides. You laughed at the sight of him, and he carefully arranged his features into sarcastic disdain when he met your eyes. 

“Our little armorer here thinks she can keep up with us,” Fives proclaimed, gesturing grandly toward you as you gave him a quizzical look, having promised no such thing. “So let’s show her a good time tonight, eh boys?” A cacophony of agreement, friendly taunts, and promises followed his words, and you shook your head, the elation of the moment sweeping you up, and downed the double shot in your hand in one gulp. 

“Ohhhhhhhh she ain’t messin around!!” Denal howled, slapping the table amid the cheers and squawks. 

“Alright, move out. I want to sit right THERE,” you demanded, pointing to the corner between Dogma and Tup, who were surprised by your sudden attention. Hardcase laughed, eternally ready to join in any sort of shenanigans and feeding off of your energy, and rose to his feet, pushing the rest of the clones right off the bench to make way for you to climb in. They filled back in, squeezing even more, and jostled each other for room until Kix toppled off the end and had to search for a chair instead. 

“Hey buddy,” you said to Tup, happily pressed against his side from shoulder to knee. His plastoid armor plates were carefully positioned to avoid digging an edge into your side, although as you snuggled in, you found yourself wondering what it would be like to slowly take each one off…

“You’re in rare form,” he noted, lifting an eyebrow at your effervescent attitude. “What was Fives on about?”

“That was all him,” you laughed, “But for some reason this just sounded really fun tonight. You excited about the dancers? Perhaps get yourself a special one?” Why were you baiting him like this? Your head felt a little bubbly, and the wild atmosphere was doing nothing to help it. Tup gave a low chuckle, dropping his eyes to the table, tracing his finger around a ring of condensation drops from his tall drink.

“Jesse threatened to buy me one, but I doubt he’ll go through with it. He’d rather spend the credits on drinks for the ladies…” 

“Well. You deserve a break. You can’t keep everything pent up inside all the time,” you affirmed, nodding confidently as you shifted to survey the rest of the crowd. Tup looked up at the side of your face, suddenly pensive and solemn, as though he yearned to speak. You felt his eyes on you and turned back curiously, eyebrows lifted and an inviting smile on your lips, but he just returned your grin with a small one of his own, shook his head a little, and followed your previous glance out to the crowd as the announcer began introducing the infamous guest stars. 

* * * 

The show seemed to go on forever, punctuated with breaks where the performers would come out and work the crowd… both literally and figuratively. The booth had emptied a bit, as the troopers scattered to the refresher, the bar, and other groups. You and Tup had been lost in conversation, heads leaned together, living through adventures and faraway thoughts, completely engrossed in each other’s company. The connection was absolutely vibrant, and you felt pulled to him more than ever before. The general raucousness of the bar got louder as the performers were making their way upstairs, scattering to dance and laugh with the clones there. You felt a sudden flare of passion, a mixture of jealousy, protectiveness, and the mounting pressure of all the feelings you had for this trooper that you’d been stifling for so long. 

Two of the dancers whirled over to the booth, purring their invitations. One slowly sat on the eager knees Jesse, who laughed and yelled, “For free?!” The other climbed onto the bench on all fours and began crawling toward Tup, who looked alarmed. In a rush of emotion, you scrambled to get up, banging your knee on the table incredibly hard as you suddenly threw yourself across Tup’s lap. As you straddled him, you turned and put a hand out toward the Twi’lek. 

“This one’s mine, honey!” you said, channeling all the sass you’d ever seen on the holovids. The performer laughed, waggling her finger at you and sidling back out of the booth, only to be quickly scooped up by a pilot trooper. You turned back to Tup, resting your hands on his shoulders and looking down at him now from your perch on his lap. He was sitting straight as an arrow, hands held up slightly out to the sides as if he didn’t know where to put them. Heat blossomed across your cheeks and throughout your chest, and you laughed, trying to seem lighthearted but also not wanting to move anytime soon.

“I’m just looking out for you,” you said teasingly, glancing over your shoulders in mock fright as though there were horrors lurking around every corner. As you came back to him, he let out a laugh that almost sounded forced, and you noticed his eyebrows were working overtime to conceal the cesspool of emotions that were funneling through his brain.

“Thank goodness,” he breathed, with another nervous chuckle, awkwardly lowering his hands to the outsides of your thighs and setting them down so precariously, you’d think you were made of glass. 

“Better make it convincing though,” you said, lifting your hands to his hair, where you gently pulled the band off of his ever-present man bun. His textured brown locks toppled down, holding their shape where they’d been twisted around each other day after day. It was comical, as it lay in messy tufts around his shoulders and one decidedly large bump in the middle, but it was also incredibly sexy, and you felt yourself literally salivating. You also felt a panic settle in all of a sudden, wondering if you were wildly crossing the line… Or perhaps you were getting a question answered that had been burning for a long time now. 

He lifted his chin, eyes fluttering shut for a full second as you slowly, painstakingly raked your fingers through his hair, now free of its tight constraint. Your hands continued across his skull, down the back of his neck, and then forward along each side of his jawline until they came together at his chin, where you finished by giving his nose a tiny boop. His eyes widened, realizing your face was within inches of his, and he suddenly shifted himself to the side, knocking you off balance and onto the bench. He scrambled out of the booth, catching one quick glimpse from Jesse, who had been oblivious to you two due to the undulating distraction in front of him.

You felt a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach, cringing so hard at the thought that you may have just ruined everything, and you flailed to get out of the booth after him. You caught sight of him disappearing out the balcony door (you didn’t know 79s had a balcony did ya? It does now!) just as it closed behind him. Pausing before following him out, you watched him lean on the railing, looking at the Coruscant underworld stretching out before him as his hair drifted across his eyes in the speeder-induced breeze. His expression was unreadable, and startled you in how foreign it looked. 

Taking a deep breath, you ventured outside, steeling yourself to try to patch things up. You pulled up next to the railing next to him and faced the city skyline, feeling too sheepish to meet him head-on. You fumbled for words, wringing your hands together in not-so-subtle anxiety. “I’m sorry…” you began.

“Don't ever do that again!,” he said suddenly, startling you into standing up straight and facing him fully. You were filled with regret, looking up at him apologetically and readying your explanations, until he continued speaking in a low growl that sent an electric shock through you. “You have no idea what it does to me…” he admitted, voice slightly hoarse at the end. He slowly stood from his lean over the railing, leaving one hand on it and turning toward you, the other hand pushing his hair out of his face. As your eyes found his, you were lost in the rich brown pools of emotion, accentuated by the wildly mess of his hair that made him look like an entirely different person. His hand clenched at his side, and he shifted his eyes off to the horizon again. 

“What does it do to you, Tup?” you asked quietly, and he closed his eyes at his name, soft on your lips, before slowly opening them and taking a step closer.The intensity of his gaze and the singular focus of his presence were electrifying, and you felt as though your insides were trembling. 

“It drives me crazy,” he whispered, some dark waves twisting across his forehead as the breeze ruffled past. He looked from eye to eye, taking in your face with an enamored stare as though he were seeing it for the first time. “I don’t want to make things awkward. I love our talks. I love getting to see you. I love your wit, your intelligence, your curiosity…” His confession had been coming out more confidently but hit an abrupt halt as his gaze dropped to the ground. “I’m sorry if it ruins our friendship,” he said with a resigned tone, and your heart took a tentative leap in your chest as you processed his words, hoping they meant what you thought they did. 

Fueled by his vulnerability and absolutely irresistible look, you reached for him, slipping your hands around the back of his neck, one slightly roving up into the roots of his hair at the base of his neck, and pulled him gently toward you. His arms were around you in a flash, and after one last meaningful, searching glance that seemed to stretch out into eternity, he closed the distance and kissed you deeply. Your tiny gasp of delight was swallowed up by his mouth pressed against yours, muscles tightening around you, pulling you against his armor. His hair gently tickled your cheeks, and you savored the taste of his lips, the scent of his shampoo, and the electrifying excitement of being in his embrace. 

He pulled back, mouth falling open as though he couldn’t believe what had just happened, and stared at you in awe. You offered a sheepish smile, giddy at the sight of him so shocked and enthralled. He lowered his hands to take yours, shaking his head at the ground, still dumbfounded. 

“I’ve wanted to do that for a long time,” you admitted, and he jerked his head back up to you, mouth curving into an elated smile. “You’re my favorite, Tup. You’re brave and insightful and kind and complex… I think the world of you.” Each word you spoke seemed to inflate him more and more with an overjoyed enchantment that lit up his face in a way you hadn’t seen before. 

“I didn’t think people saw us as unique enough to be interested… for real…” he murmured, and you shook your head, surprised and sad that he’d have such a notion. You lifted a hand to his cheek, which sent his eyebrows up a little further, and touched your nose to his. 

“Well I do,” you said, leaning in to kiss him again. He eagerly reciprocated, pressing one hand against the small of your back and drawing the other up between your shoulder blades. His lips were so soft, yet firm and commanding, and his nose pressed into your cheek. There was more of a passion to it now, an intimacy and urgency that set off fireworks in your soul, and you dug your hands into his hair again, relishing the thick tufts between your fingers as you clenched it gently at the roots. A satisfied rumble came from his chest, and he tilted his head, deepening the kiss until you were seeing stars. When he finally let you go, you gasped in as much of the cold night air as you could as though it alone were tethering you to reality. He smiled, face inches away, glowing with wonder. 

“I think there might be more of those Twi’leks up here,” he said with a mischievous glint in his eye, and you laughed breathlessly. “Better make it convincing,” he murmured, turning to back you up against the side of the building, leaning in with a sudden confidence, and bringing his hands to your face. He was kissing you again, pressing against you all over, hands roving from cheek to shoulder to waist to hair. It felt as though a dam had broken, and so much that had been held at bay was crashing down in the most incredible, unbelievable way. You lifted your leg, wrapping it around him, and he immediately gripped it with a gloved hand, moving his armored thigh and hip into you for support and stability. Kissing your way down his neck as he rolled his head to the side, closing his eyes in blissful abandon, you gave the top of his turtleneck a little snap, sending both of you into a quiet giggle fit as you held yourselves together. Every inch yearned to be connected, and you slowly lowered your leg, nestling your head into his neck and shoulder, not daring to move lest you wake up from this dream. 

“I guess we did show you a decent time tonight, eh?” he whispered in your ear, wrapping his arms around your shoulders in a warm, protective hug.

[adambstingus]

Jar Jar Binks, Watto and more most annoying things in the Star Wars universe

Jar Jar Binks

Image: starwars.com

Weve been through a lot together, Star Wars fans, from pod-racing to Kylo Rens lightsaber. We’ve dealt with Liam Neesons luxurious hair and Ewan McGregors luxurious hair and Harrison Fords luxurious hair and Adam Drivers luxurious hair.

While most of the journey has been an exciting trip to a world we wished we lived in, there are some notable pain points hate-inducing enough to make even the most loyal of fans curse George Lucas name. Whoose you thinksa Im talking aboutsa?

SEE ALSO: ‘Rogue One’ director justifies reshoots: ‘Star Wars has to be fantastic’

Below, 13 of the most annoying things about Star Wars.

13. Baby Boba Fett

This one tops a lot of lists of worst Star Wars characters, but it’s only because adult Boba Fett is so universally adored. Maybe its the unexciting revelation that he’s a clone of Jango Fett, the Mandalorian warrior who is also cloned for the aptly named Clone Army, that upsets people, or its that their favorite character is unveiled as a dumb kid who spends most of his scenes glaring and silently brooding. He might as well not have been there and maybe it would have been better that way. The mystery was one of the most alluring aspects of Boba Fett to begin with.

12. Ewoks

This is a touchy one. For the record, I do not have a problem with Ewoks. I also, since ceasing to be a 7-year-old kid, see how they could upset some people. Leia meets an animate teddy bear in the woods who threatens her and then immediately needs her help walking through the woods hes supposedly lived in his whole life. Its a stretch for us to believe that this species would have made it through the evolutionary wringer, let alone take down a legion of the most trained, feared and technologically advanced military in the galaxy.

SEE ALSO: Here’s how the ‘Star Wars’ droids could help you survive the holidays

11. Luke Skywalkers Maturity Level

When you watch A New Hope as a kid, Luke Skywalker is your hero. When you watch it again as an adult, you realize, Oh, wow, this guy is a kid.

At the storys beginning, Luke Skywalker is 16 and he acts like it, whining about chores and wishing he could instead go to Tosche station to get power converters. The first thing he does upon entering the Millennium Falcon is moan about what a piece of junk it is. He then interrupts the adults to scream, WHATS THAT FLASHING THING?! while trying to press all the blinking buttons on its dashboard like a spoiled toddler. Luckily for us, and the series, Luke grows up.

10. Nute Gunray

Image: starwars.com

The Neimoidian Viceroy of the Trade Federation and Separatist leader is cowardly, dumb and boring, all the while boasting an offensive Asian accent. Gunray is so bafflingly useless and obviously two-faced, the intelligence of all characters who trust him is immediately suspect. We would rejoice when Darth Sidious orders the newly named Darth Vader to do away with the Viceroy and his buds, but honestly we keep forgetting he exists each time he exits the screen.

9. Boss Nass

Gungans are already hard to love. So when their leader rolls in refusing to cooperate with our heroes and spraying saliva like a bad Richard Nixon impression, its especially hard to get on board. Maybe fans would have hated him less if the good Gungan name hadnt already been soured for so many by a certain Mr. Jar Jar of Binks.

8. Padawan Braid

Image: composite, all photos by starwars.com

George Lucas can call them Padawan braids, a symbol of rank in the Jedi training, but we all know what they are: rat-tails. Its tough to associate the single, long, skinny braid with the calm and enlightened Jedi order when so many of us associate it with that kid down the street who tried to steal beer out of peoples garages. Give us a bearded and long-haired Obi Wan, or No-bi Wan, please.

7. Sy Snootles and the Max Rebo Band

Barf. Barf. Barf. George Lucas claimed he always wished this musical interlude at Jabbas palace in Return of the Jedi could have been an extended sequence, and in 2000, the extreme hubris of the digitally remastered versions gave him his chance. The new CGI iteration of Sy Snootles, lead singer of the Max Rebo band, turned a strange but charming alien into an uncomfortably sexual one. It even threw in some anachronistic backup singers for good measure, along with a loud creature named Joh Yowza screaming in huttese directly into the camera. The tone is completely wrong for the setting, and frankly, its hard to watch. Even more cringe-worthy? The new song theyre singing is called Jedi Rocks. Woof.

6. Young Anakin

You know, maybe the character of Anakin Skywalker was doomed to fail. Maybe nothing could have ever matched our expectations. Darth Vader had been too perfect. He was the baddest baddie we had ever seen, how could his backstory ever have lived up to his future? Or maybe its that George Lucas has seemingly never interacted with a child, so for research, he watched Dennis the Menace and Leave it to Beaver and wrote down a few one-liners before calling it quits so he could spend more time planning Jar Jar Binks hijinks.

The resulting Little Ani is a cloyingly innocent 1950s cartoon character, practically on the verge of saying, Gee Whiz, Mister Qui-Gon! in every scene. Any evidence of his future capacity for deep emotion, any whispers of darkness that might be hidden in his heart, any foreshadowing of the towering villain he is to become is deafeningly absent.

When we saw Voldemorts childhood, we saw the events that led him to mature into an evil mass murderer and it enriched our fear of the villain, making it more confusing, more real. When we saw Darth Vaders childhood, we saw a bunch of lame jokes, a plain personality and pod-racing.

5. Jabba the Hutts Tongue

OH GOD. OH GOD NO. PUT IT BACK. PUT IT BACK IN YOUR MOUTH. I CANT LOOK. SOMEONE TELL ME WHEN ITS OVER. IM PUKING. IM PUKING RIGHT NOW.

4. Watto

Image: starwars.com

There is nothing to love about Watto. Hes a slave owner. He constantly flies around on flimsy wings that couldnt possibly support his bulbous, lazy body. Hes smarmy, arrogant and unintelligent. Oh, and hes a monstrously racist stereotype. Greedy, slimy, with a large nose and a middle-eastern accent, Watto feels like every false anti-semitic caricature come to life. The Toydarian junk-dealer takes up way too much space in The Phantom Menace, and honestly, his body looks so fragile its a shock that none of his slaves swatted him to finish him off. I know plenty of fans who are up to the job.

3. Cheesy Dialogue

Now that Im with you again, Im in agony. My heart is beating hoping that a kiss will not become a scar. Love wont save you, Padme. Only my new powers can do that. The Force runs strong in my family. My father has it. I have it. And… my sister has it. Yes. It’s you, Leia.

Groaaaaaan. Look. George Lucas. Its OK. We all need an editor. Use one.

2. Midi-chlorians

The biggest knife in the back to die-hard Star Wars fans? The introduction of midi-chlorians in The Phantom Menace, answering the enormous question that no one was asking: How does the Force work? Qui-Gon tells us that midi-chlorians are little, microscopic life forms, living inside of cells that are the conduit for the Force.

The thing is, we already had an explanation for the Force from Obi Wan in A New Hope. Retroactively adding details about microscopic life forms living in your body doesnt totally fit with Obi Wans explanation, making our image of the Force messier instead of clearer. Midi-chlorians reduce a beautiful cosmic connection to something physical and less cool. Instead of expanding the Force, they narrow it. People have been frozen in carbonite for less heinous crimes.

1. Jar Jar Binks

Image: starwars.com

While many of the above offenders may be worse than the most notorious Gungan, nobody could take home the gold without me receiving a flood of death threats, so here you go! The worst part about Star Wars is Jar Jar Binks.

Jar Jars biggest crime is over-exposure. Maybe a measured amount of meesa so dumb dumb moments, executed with surgical precision would have, in fact, been a welcome distraction from an otherwise boring plot. Unfortunately, well never know Jar Jar Binks as anything other than the bumbling moron who pretty much laid out the red carpet for Palpatine to take over the Senate.

Kids loved him. Adults wanted to rip their eyeballs out of their skulls and shove them deep into their eardrums to keep from ever hearing him again. Intended to be lovable, actually unbearable, Jar Jar Binks blows and thats all there is to it.

BONUS: ‘Rogue One: A Star Wars Story’ reimagined as a homemade trailer

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/12/04/jar-jar-binks-watto-and-more-most-annoying-things-in-the-star-wars-universe/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/168171128242

[snootlestheangel]

Daily Snootles Rant

I FUCKING HATE NONSTICK PANS

I've never owned a nonstick pan, never saw the need to.

One of my new roommates owns some nonstick pans and she is kind enough to let us use them, so long as we keep them clean.

Tell me why someone in fucking college would spend over a hundred dollars on like 3 pans and not even have the proper cleaning tool for them? Like, she tells us to use the soft side of a sponge.

There was no sponge until just now.

I genuinely thought she meant the little scrub thing. It's not that abrasive, but apparently nonstick pans are so fucking easily scratched your fucking fingernail can probably do more damage to them than anything.

They're expensive, easily damaged if not cared for properly, and quite frankly still require a little bit of butter if you don't want to fucking scorch your eggs

Just fucking ahjkfahlksfqgiewgk

[allofbeercom]

Jar Jar Binks, Watto and more most annoying things in the Star Wars universe

Jar Jar Binks

Image: starwars.com

Weve been through a lot together, Star Wars fans, from pod-racing to Kylo Rens lightsaber. We’ve dealt with Liam Neesons luxurious hair and Ewan McGregors luxurious hair and Harrison Fords luxurious hair and Adam Drivers luxurious hair.

While most of the journey has been an exciting trip to a world we wished we lived in, there are some notable pain points hate-inducing enough to make even the most loyal of fans curse George Lucas name. Whoose you thinksa Im talking aboutsa?

SEE ALSO: ‘Rogue One’ director justifies reshoots: ‘Star Wars has to be fantastic’

Below, 13 of the most annoying things about Star Wars.

13. Baby Boba Fett

This one tops a lot of lists of worst Star Wars characters, but it’s only because adult Boba Fett is so universally adored. Maybe its the unexciting revelation that he’s a clone of Jango Fett, the Mandalorian warrior who is also cloned for the aptly named Clone Army, that upsets people, or its that their favorite character is unveiled as a dumb kid who spends most of his scenes glaring and silently brooding. He might as well not have been there and maybe it would have been better that way. The mystery was one of the most alluring aspects of Boba Fett to begin with.

12. Ewoks

This is a touchy one. For the record, I do not have a problem with Ewoks. I also, since ceasing to be a 7-year-old kid, see how they could upset some people. Leia meets an animate teddy bear in the woods who threatens her and then immediately needs her help walking through the woods hes supposedly lived in his whole life. Its a stretch for us to believe that this species would have made it through the evolutionary wringer, let alone take down a legion of the most trained, feared and technologically advanced military in the galaxy.

SEE ALSO: Here’s how the ‘Star Wars’ droids could help you survive the holidays

11. Luke Skywalkers Maturity Level

When you watch A New Hope as a kid, Luke Skywalker is your hero. When you watch it again as an adult, you realize, Oh, wow, this guy is a kid.

At the storys beginning, Luke Skywalker is 16 and he acts like it, whining about chores and wishing he could instead go to Tosche station to get power converters. The first thing he does upon entering the Millennium Falcon is moan about what a piece of junk it is. He then interrupts the adults to scream, WHATS THAT FLASHING THING?! while trying to press all the blinking buttons on its dashboard like a spoiled toddler. Luckily for us, and the series, Luke grows up.

10. Nute Gunray

Image: starwars.com

The Neimoidian Viceroy of the Trade Federation and Separatist leader is cowardly, dumb and boring, all the while boasting an offensive Asian accent. Gunray is so bafflingly useless and obviously two-faced, the intelligence of all characters who trust him is immediately suspect. We would rejoice when Darth Sidious orders the newly named Darth Vader to do away with the Viceroy and his buds, but honestly we keep forgetting he exists each time he exits the screen.

9. Boss Nass

Gungans are already hard to love. So when their leader rolls in refusing to cooperate with our heroes and spraying saliva like a bad Richard Nixon impression, its especially hard to get on board. Maybe fans would have hated him less if the good Gungan name hadnt already been soured for so many by a certain Mr. Jar Jar of Binks.

8. Padawan Braid

Image: composite, all photos by starwars.com

George Lucas can call them Padawan braids, a symbol of rank in the Jedi training, but we all know what they are: rat-tails. Its tough to associate the single, long, skinny braid with the calm and enlightened Jedi order when so many of us associate it with that kid down the street who tried to steal beer out of peoples garages. Give us a bearded and long-haired Obi Wan, or No-bi Wan, please.

7. Sy Snootles and the Max Rebo Band

Barf. Barf. Barf. George Lucas claimed he always wished this musical interlude at Jabbas palace in Return of the Jedi could have been an extended sequence, and in 2000, the extreme hubris of the digitally remastered versions gave him his chance. The new CGI iteration of Sy Snootles, lead singer of the Max Rebo band, turned a strange but charming alien into an uncomfortably sexual one. It even threw in some anachronistic backup singers for good measure, along with a loud creature named Joh Yowza screaming in huttese directly into the camera. The tone is completely wrong for the setting, and frankly, its hard to watch. Even more cringe-worthy? The new song theyre singing is called Jedi Rocks. Woof.

6. Young Anakin

You know, maybe the character of Anakin Skywalker was doomed to fail. Maybe nothing could have ever matched our expectations. Darth Vader had been too perfect. He was the baddest baddie we had ever seen, how could his backstory ever have lived up to his future? Or maybe its that George Lucas has seemingly never interacted with a child, so for research, he watched Dennis the Menace and Leave it to Beaver and wrote down a few one-liners before calling it quits so he could spend more time planning Jar Jar Binks hijinks.

The resulting Little Ani is a cloyingly innocent 1950s cartoon character, practically on the verge of saying, Gee Whiz, Mister Qui-Gon! in every scene. Any evidence of his future capacity for deep emotion, any whispers of darkness that might be hidden in his heart, any foreshadowing of the towering villain he is to become is deafeningly absent.

When we saw Voldemorts childhood, we saw the events that led him to mature into an evil mass murderer and it enriched our fear of the villain, making it more confusing, more real. When we saw Darth Vaders childhood, we saw a bunch of lame jokes, a plain personality and pod-racing.

5. Jabba the Hutts Tongue

OH GOD. OH GOD NO. PUT IT BACK. PUT IT BACK IN YOUR MOUTH. I CANT LOOK. SOMEONE TELL ME WHEN ITS OVER. IM PUKING. IM PUKING RIGHT NOW.

4. Watto

Image: starwars.com

There is nothing to love about Watto. Hes a slave owner. He constantly flies around on flimsy wings that couldnt possibly support his bulbous, lazy body. Hes smarmy, arrogant and unintelligent. Oh, and hes a monstrously racist stereotype. Greedy, slimy, with a large nose and a middle-eastern accent, Watto feels like every false anti-semitic caricature come to life. The Toydarian junk-dealer takes up way too much space in The Phantom Menace, and honestly, his body looks so fragile its a shock that none of his slaves swatted him to finish him off. I know plenty of fans who are up to the job.

3. Cheesy Dialogue

Now that Im with you again, Im in agony. My heart is beating hoping that a kiss will not become a scar. Love wont save you, Padme. Only my new powers can do that. The Force runs strong in my family. My father has it. I have it. And… my sister has it. Yes. It’s you, Leia.

Groaaaaaan. Look. George Lucas. Its OK. We all need an editor. Use one.

2. Midi-chlorians

The biggest knife in the back to die-hard Star Wars fans? The introduction of midi-chlorians in The Phantom Menace, answering the enormous question that no one was asking: How does the Force work? Qui-Gon tells us that midi-chlorians are little, microscopic life forms, living inside of cells that are the conduit for the Force.

The thing is, we already had an explanation for the Force from Obi Wan in A New Hope. Retroactively adding details about microscopic life forms living in your body doesnt totally fit with Obi Wans explanation, making our image of the Force messier instead of clearer. Midi-chlorians reduce a beautiful cosmic connection to something physical and less cool. Instead of expanding the Force, they narrow it. People have been frozen in carbonite for less heinous crimes.

1. Jar Jar Binks

Image: starwars.com

While many of the above offenders may be worse than the most notorious Gungan, nobody could take home the gold without me receiving a flood of death threats, so here you go! The worst part about Star Wars is Jar Jar Binks.

Jar Jars biggest crime is over-exposure. Maybe a measured amount of meesa so dumb dumb moments, executed with surgical precision would have, in fact, been a welcome distraction from an otherwise boring plot. Unfortunately, well never know Jar Jar Binks as anything other than the bumbling moron who pretty much laid out the red carpet for Palpatine to take over the Senate.

Kids loved him. Adults wanted to rip their eyeballs out of their skulls and shove them deep into their eardrums to keep from ever hearing him again. Intended to be lovable, actually unbearable, Jar Jar Binks blows and thats all there is to it.

BONUS: ‘Rogue One: A Star Wars Story’ reimagined as a homemade trailer

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/2017/12/04/jar-jar-binks-watto-and-more-most-annoying-things-in-the-star-wars-universe/

[freesia-writes]

Some Tup Love ❤️

Doing all these one shots for clones I’ve never written before has been SO FUN! I somehow lost the ask post for this one, but here is the sweet little glimpse into this adorable boy for @fives-girlfriend <3

.

Tup x Reader - Word Count: 3.6k

“Come on, Tup. It’ll be awesome!” Hardcase exclaimed, clapping him on the back with enough enthusiasm to nearly knock him off his bench. 

“Yeah, they’ve never done this at 79s before!” Fives added, and even Dogma nodded vigorously through his mouthful of food. 

“I know, it’s just…” Tup began, but Jesse’s arrival, accompanied with a loud “who’s ready to party tonight?!” drowned out the rest of his reply. 

It was the talk of the mess hall -- Sy Snootles was coming to perform at 79s, and she was bringing along an infamous troupe of Twi’lek dancers, supposedly heralded throughout the galaxy as some of the most luscious and lascivious one could encounter. The clones who were lucky enough to be on Coruscant were undoubtedly excited, as they were rarely considered deserving of such luxuries. A few squads were planning to attend, the 501st being one of them, as you had heard on your lunch break. 

You worked with them frequently when they were on world, providing armor improvements, repairs, and tune-ups beyond what they would do for regular inspections. You were part of a small team that scuttled from armory to armory, equipping troopers with updated devices and outfitting new squads. The 501st boys were some of your favorites, having enough personality among them for the entire GAR. One in particular had always held a soft spot in your heart, with his unassuming demeanor and quiet insight. You’d chatted with him often while going over various armor components, and the stories he’d shared about the horrors of Umbara had broken your heart for him. He’d formed strong bonds with his brothers, especially after enduring that nightmare, and you’d felt your affection growing as you saw him grow from a fresh little rookie to a skilled negotiator, brave soldier, and man of strong convictions. 

If you were honest, he’d grown on you a lot. You found yourself daydreaming, during slow hours, of slowly freeing his hair from its neat little bun, running your fingers through it, and tracing your lips across his cheek to the little teardrop tattoo beneath his eye. But you’d also become close friends, and you were fairly certain that was the extent of his perspective and feelings toward you. There was an intimacy and familiarity between you that had been established as he’d shared some of his most vulnerable moments and harrowing experiences while you’d listened quietly, patting his hand and offering empathetic platitudes that couldn’t begin to match the magnitude of what he had been through. At some point, it had grown into more than just fondness, you’d realized, and it resulted in a simmering attraction that burned in your chest whenever you saw him. 

So when you found him at the back of the cluster of troopers waiting for the lift after lunch, and he caught sight of you as you approached him from the side, it sent a little shiver of tingles down your spine at the small smile that curved across his face. 

“CT-5385,” you said quietly, giving him a solemn salute that earned you an eyeroll as he looped his arm across your shoulders, pulling you into a warm side hug. 

“Cut it out,” he commanded, dropping his arm as you filtered into the crowded lift. “You heard all the fuss about 79s tonight?” he asked, barely audible over the rest of the chatter in the small space. 

“I did. You going?” you asked, feeling a sudden whirlwind of mixed emotions at it. 

“I’m not really feeling it, but it doesn’t sound like I have a choice,” Tup answered, shrugging and tipping his head toward his fellow blue-striped 501st brothers. 

“I can call you in for an emergency armor upgrade if you’d like,” you offered, to which he chuckled and shook his head. 

“Why don’t you just come?” he asked, looking up at you with those large honey-brown eyes. “It would make it a lot more bearable, that’s for sure.”

Your heart skipped a beat, wondering if he did have feelings for you after all, or if it was just the simple statement of one enjoying the company of a friend. You couldn’t help but smile, though, and tried to angle your face away from the light as you felt your cheeks grow slightly warm as you wondered about his affections. 

“I will if you will,” you said, resuming your light and airy attitude as the lift doors whooshed open. 

“Game on,” he declared, giving you the cheesiest finger guns you’d ever seen, promptly cringing at it, shrugging, and pulling his helmet on as he trotted off after his squad. 

“It’s a date?” you whispered under your breath as he disappeared around the corner.

* * * 

79s was packed to the brim, and clusters of troopers spilled out onto the streets all around it. The atmosphere was infectiously exciting, as though the entire world were on pause and tonight was a chance to escape it all for a few hours. There were three times as many food carts as usual, as the local vendors were quick to pick up on any chance for some extra business, and the entire block seemed like a party in itself. You started to feel anxious and out of place, as this wasn’t usually your thing. It had been something you and Tup had bonded over from the start -- a preference for more quiet, intellectual, serene spaces as opposed to the vibrant party scenes that more of the troopers opted for. 

You adjusted your outfit, feeling slightly self-conscious as it was decidedly more fitted and flattering than your simple work jumpsuit. You realized you had never really seen Tup in a more informal setting, as your interactions were primarily in the mess hall, the armory, or the barracks. All the questions and doubts began to swirl in your mind, amplified by the booming music that assaulted you as soon as you pushed your way into 79s. Heading straight for the bar and downing a double shot of liquid courage before you even looked around, you wiped your mouth on the back of your hand, returning the glass to the countertop and scanning the room for familiar faces.

“You’re off to an ambitious start,” came a smooth voice from behind you. “Lookin to stir up some trouble? Give those Twi’leks some competition?” You smirked, turning to face Fives, whose presence could be felt as much as heard. His boisterousness and joviality always brought a smile to your face, and you admired his ability to channel that even after his harrowing experiences at war. 

“Oh, you know me…” you said, shrugging as you felt the tingly burn down your throat, warming your chest. “Where are the rest of the boys?”

“Upstairs, for now. Lost a fight with the 212th for the table by the stage, but we’re plotting our revenge,” Fives said with a conspiratorial wink as he jerked his head toward the stairs, motioning you to come along. There was something different about tonight, whether it was the setting or the occasion or some strange alignment of the stars, and you just felt an apprehensive prickle down your spine, as though something were about to happen. You ordered another double shot, taking it with you as you trotted up the stairs after Fives. 

A couple whistles and hoots met you as you reached the top of the stairs, and you grinned bashfully as Hardcase and Jesse catcalled you while Fives announced your presence. It felt like being welcomed home, as cheesy as that sounded in your own head, with the kind familiarity and brotherly acceptance they always had for you. Hopefully not TOO brotherly… for all of them at least… Your eyes roved across their faces, finding the one that made your heart flutter. Tup was crushed in the corner of the booth, mercilessly squeezed between Hardcase and Dogma, arms pushed into his sides. You laughed at the sight of him, and he carefully arranged his features into sarcastic disdain when he met your eyes. 

“Our little armorer here thinks she can keep up with us,” Fives proclaimed, gesturing grandly toward you as you gave him a quizzical look, having promised no such thing. “So let’s show her a good time tonight, eh boys?” A cacophony of agreement, friendly taunts, and promises followed his words, and you shook your head, the elation of the moment sweeping you up, and downed the double shot in your hand in one gulp. 

“Ohhhhhhhh she ain’t messin around!!” Denal howled, slapping the table amid the cheers and squawks. 

“Alright, move out. I want to sit right THERE,” you demanded, pointing to the corner between Dogma and Tup, who were surprised by your sudden attention. Hardcase laughed, eternally ready to join in any sort of shenanigans and feeding off of your energy, and rose to his feet, pushing the rest of the clones right off the bench to make way for you to climb in. They filled back in, squeezing even more, and jostled each other for room until Kix toppled off the end and had to search for a chair instead. 

“Hey buddy,” you said to Tup, happily pressed against his side from shoulder to knee. His plastoid armor plates were carefully positioned to avoid digging an edge into your side, although as you snuggled in, you found yourself wondering what it would be like to slowly take each one off…

“You’re in rare form,” he noted, lifting an eyebrow at your effervescent attitude. “What was Fives on about?”

“That was all him,” you laughed, “But for some reason this just sounded really fun tonight. You excited about the dancers? Perhaps get yourself a special one?” Why were you baiting him like this? Your head felt a little bubbly, and the wild atmosphere was doing nothing to help it. Tup gave a low chuckle, dropping his eyes to the table, tracing his finger around a ring of condensation drops from his tall drink.

“Jesse threatened to buy me one, but I doubt he’ll go through with it. He’d rather spend the credits on drinks for the ladies…” 

“Well. You deserve a break. You can’t keep everything pent up inside all the time,” you affirmed, nodding confidently as you shifted to survey the rest of the crowd. Tup looked up at the side of your face, suddenly pensive and solemn, as though he yearned to speak. You felt his eyes on you and turned back curiously, eyebrows lifted and an inviting smile on your lips, but he just returned your grin with a small one of his own, shook his head a little, and followed your previous glance out to the crowd as the announcer began introducing the infamous guest stars. 

* * * 

The show seemed to go on forever, punctuated with breaks where the performers would come out and work the crowd… both literally and figuratively. The booth had emptied a bit, as the troopers scattered to the refresher, the bar, and other groups. You and Tup had been lost in conversation, heads leaned together, living through adventures and faraway thoughts, completely engrossed in each other’s company. The connection was absolutely vibrant, and you felt pulled to him more than ever before. The general raucousness of the bar got louder as the performers were making their way upstairs, scattering to dance and laugh with the clones there. You felt a sudden flare of passion, a mixture of jealousy, protectiveness, and the mounting pressure of all the feelings you had for this trooper that you’d been stifling for so long. 

Two of the dancers whirled over to the booth, purring their invitations. One slowly sat on the eager knees Jesse, who laughed and yelled, “For free?!” The other climbed onto the bench on all fours and began crawling toward Tup, who looked alarmed. In a rush of emotion, you scrambled to get up, banging your knee on the table incredibly hard as you suddenly threw yourself across Tup’s lap. As you straddled him, you turned and put a hand out toward the Twi’lek. 

“This one’s mine, honey!” you said, channeling all the sass you’d ever seen on the holovids. The performer laughed, waggling her finger at you and sidling back out of the booth, only to be quickly scooped up by a pilot trooper. You turned back to Tup, resting your hands on his shoulders and looking down at him now from your perch on his lap. He was sitting straight as an arrow, hands held up slightly out to the sides as if he didn’t know where to put them. Heat blossomed across your cheeks and throughout your chest, and you laughed, trying to seem lighthearted but also not wanting to move anytime soon.

“I’m just looking out for you,” you said teasingly, glancing over your shoulders in mock fright as though there were horrors lurking around every corner. As you came back to him, he let out a laugh that almost sounded forced, and you noticed his eyebrows were working overtime to conceal the cesspool of emotions that were funneling through his brain.

“Thank goodness,” he breathed, with another nervous chuckle, awkwardly lowering his hands to the outsides of your thighs and setting them down so precariously, you’d think you were made of glass. 

“Better make it convincing though,” you said, lifting your hands to his hair, where you gently pulled the band off of his ever-present man bun. His textured brown locks toppled down, holding their shape where they’d been twisted around each other day after day. It was comical, as it lay in messy tufts around his shoulders and one decidedly large bump in the middle, but it was also incredibly sexy, and you felt yourself literally salivating. You also felt a panic settle in all of a sudden, wondering if you were wildly crossing the line… Or perhaps you were getting a question answered that had been burning for a long time now. 

He lifted his chin, eyes fluttering shut for a full second as you slowly, painstakingly raked your fingers through his hair, now free of its tight constraint. Your hands continued across his skull, down the back of his neck, and then forward along each side of his jawline until they came together at his chin, where you finished by giving his nose a tiny boop. His eyes widened, realizing your face was within inches of his, and he suddenly shifted himself to the side, knocking you off balance and onto the bench. He scrambled out of the booth, catching one quick glimpse from Jesse, who had been oblivious to you two due to the undulating distraction in front of him.

You felt a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach, cringing so hard at the thought that you may have just ruined everything, and you flailed to get out of the booth after him. You caught sight of him disappearing out the balcony door (you didn’t know 79s had a balcony did ya? It does now!) just as it closed behind him. Pausing before following him out, you watched him lean on the railing, looking at the Coruscant underworld stretching out before him as his hair drifted across his eyes in the speeder-induced breeze. His expression was unreadable, and startled you in how foreign it looked. 

Taking a deep breath, you ventured outside, steeling yourself to try to patch things up. You pulled up next to the railing next to him and faced the city skyline, feeling too sheepish to meet him head-on. You fumbled for words, wringing your hands together in not-so-subtle anxiety. “I’m sorry…” you began.

“Don't ever do that again!,” he said suddenly, startling you into standing up straight and facing him fully. You were filled with regret, looking up at him apologetically and readying your explanations, until he continued speaking in a low growl that sent an electric shock through you. “You have no idea what it does to me…” he admitted, voice slightly hoarse at the end. He slowly stood from his lean over the railing, leaving one hand on it and turning toward you, the other hand pushing his hair out of his face. As your eyes found his, you were lost in the rich brown pools of emotion, accentuated by the wild mess of his hair that made him look like an entirely different person. His hand clenched at his side, and he shifted his eyes off to the horizon again. 

“What does it do to you, Tup?” you asked quietly, and he closed his eyes at his name, soft on your lips, before slowly opening them and taking a step closer. The intensity of his gaze and the singular focus of his presence were electrifying, and you felt as though your insides were trembling. 

“It drives me crazy,” he whispered, some dark waves twisting across his forehead as the breeze ruffled past. He looked from eye to eye, taking in your face with an enamored stare as though he were seeing it for the first time. “I don’t want to make things awkward. I love our talks. I love getting to see you. I love your wit, your intelligence, your curiosity…” His confession had been coming out more confidently but hit an abrupt halt as his gaze dropped to the ground. “I’m sorry if it ruins our friendship,” he said with a resigned tone, and your heart took a tentative leap in your chest as you processed his words, hoping they meant what you thought they did. 

Fueled by his vulnerability and absolutely irresistible look, you reached for him, slipping your hands around the back of his neck, one slightly roving up into the roots of his hair at the base of his neck, and pulled him gently toward you. His arms were around you in a flash, and after one last meaningful, searching glance that seemed to stretch out into eternity, he closed the distance and kissed you deeply. Your tiny gasp of delight was swallowed up by his mouth pressed against yours, muscles tightening around you, pulling you against his armor. His hair gently tickled your cheeks, and you savored the taste of his lips, the scent of his shampoo, and the electrifying excitement of being in his embrace. 

He pulled back, mouth falling open as though he couldn’t believe what had just happened, and stared at you in awe. You offered a sheepish smile, giddy at the sight of him so shocked and enthralled. He lowered his hands to take yours, shaking his head at the ground, still dumbfounded. 

“I’ve wanted to do that for a long time,” you admitted, and he jerked his head back up to you, mouth curving into an elated smile. “You’re my favorite, Tup. You’re brave and insightful and kind and complex… I think the world of you.” Each word you spoke seemed to inflate him more and more with an overjoyed enchantment that lit up his face in a way you hadn’t seen before. 

“I didn’t think people saw us as unique enough to be interested… for real…” he murmured, and you shook your head, surprised and sad that he’d have such a notion. You lifted a hand to his cheek, which sent his eyebrows up a little further, and touched your nose to his. 

“Well I do,” you said, leaning in to kiss him again. He eagerly reciprocated, pressing one hand against the small of your back and drawing the other up between your shoulder blades. His lips were so soft, yet firm and commanding, and his nose pressed into your cheek. There was more of a passion to it now, an intimacy and urgency that set off fireworks in your soul, and you dug your hands into his hair again, relishing the thick tufts between your fingers as you clenched it gently at the roots. A satisfied rumble came from his chest, and he tilted his head, deepening the kiss until you were seeing stars. When he finally let you go, you gasped in as much of the cold night air as you could as though it alone were tethering you to reality. He smiled, face inches away, glowing with wonder. 

“I think there might be more of those Twi’leks up here,” he said with a mischievous glint in his eye, and you laughed breathlessly. “Better make it convincing,” he murmured, turning to back you up against the side of the building, leaning in with a sudden confidence, and bringing his hands to your face. He was kissing you again, pressing against you all over, hands roving from cheek to shoulder to waist to hair. It felt as though a dam had broken, and so much that had been held at bay was crashing down in the most incredible, unbelievable way. You lifted your leg, wrapping it around him, and he immediately gripped it with a gloved hand, moving his armored thigh and hip into you for support and stability. Kissing your way down his neck as he rolled his head to the side, closing his eyes in blissful abandon, you gave the top of his turtleneck a little snap, sending both of you into a quiet giggle fit as you held yourselves together. Every inch yearned to be connected, and you slowly lowered your leg, nestling your head into his neck and shoulder, not daring to move lest you wake up from this dream. 

“I guess we did show you a decent time tonight, eh?” he whispered in your ear, wrapping his arms around your shoulders in a warm, protective hug.