#but then i remember the Ben's bed voice and yeah no im not gonna do that

[heysweetheart-writes]

Okay so. For the Red White and Royal Blue girlies and themsies out there that said yes to this blog turning bi-fandom:

The idea for the first (hopefully of many) story I want to write is an AU where Henry and Alex never meet in Rio. After Arthur's passing Henry shuts off much like Catherine in the book? And he's no where to be seen for years. He never gets to be a prick to Alex.

But Alex gets to be a prick to him during Ellen's reelection campaign where he's running high on stress and runs into Henry who's working at a coffee shop in Washington because he technically didn't abdicate but never returned to his royal duties and is trying to live a normal life where nothing is expected of him.

Enemies to lovers shenanigans ensure.

Let me know what you make of this idea! I'm eager to write it, if not a little scared because this is out of my depth haha but well if it's bad or too far fetched at least you don't pay me for it 🤣 (unless you want to)

[thegreenmetblue]

STARKER FESTIVAL SUMMER BINGO : 2nd square

not a date

read on ao3

Peter was utterly anxious. To be honest, he’s not even sure anything in his life stressed him more than that. To be fair, he wasn’t expecting this. At all. Let’s go back to earlier in the day. This morning to be more precise.

Peter was lying in his bed, watching some weird videos on YouTube. But it was Saturday morning. It’s what teenagers do on a early Saturday morning (read : at 10 am). Not that the boy was gonna say it out loud but it was either that, either reading fanfictions about Spiderman and Iron Man. But shhh if you ask him, he’d say it’s only for checking how people are describing him.

Anyway, he was watching some hilarious videos Ned has sent him for the last six days when his phone stopped the video in exchange of Tony Stark’s face. Peter’s heart skipped a beat in his chest, like every time Tony’s calling him. “Yes ?”, he answers with a faint voice. Most of the times, he has no issues talking to Tony face to face but god knows why, Peter has still big issues with calls.

“If this isn’t my favorite young adult. Hi, Pete. Im sorry if woke up you. Or maybe not that sorry, it was time to anyway.”, Tony’s voice says in the speaker. Peter’s cheeks redden at that. He doesn’t know the reason of it, but it’s been almost two months Tony stopped calling him a kid. And now he just said young adult, it gives hope to Peter’s poor heart. Maybe Tony stopped seeing him as a kid. Maybe he sees him more as an equal now ? Lost in his thoughts, the boy doesn’t even realize he didn’t answer to the man on the other side of the phone.

“Alright, imma take that as a no. Gosh, I wondered what happened to the boy that was practically begging to have all my attention.”, Tony laughs softly. Again, he just said Peter wasn’t that boy anymore. The boy makes a little shame sound to the man’s comment about his behavior, feeling his cheeks burning even more.

“N-no, im sorry, im here mr. Stark. You didn’t wake me up. And please take that back, I was never asking for you attention, old man.”, Peter shoots back. He loves doing that. He loves talking back to Tony. “Imma pretend I didn’t hear what you just called me. And Im also gonna pretend like you’re not shamelessly lying to me at the moment. Anyway, you have plans tonight ?”, Tony asks, a bit of growling in his voice. This automatically warms Peter’s heart. He’s probably gonna go to Tony’s lab tonight.

Peter was trying not to smile too much when he remembered Tony wasn’t actually there. “No, I don’t have anything. You want me in the lab ?”, the boy asks and immediately regrets his choice of words. want me in the lab. Fuck. He was gonna say sorry to that, but thanks god Tony speaks before he can make it even more awkward. “No actually I was thinking of something a little more fun. What do you say about eating in a fancy restaurant tonight ?”. Peter’s heart doesn’t skip a beat this time, it skips severals. Tony wants- what ?

“What ?”, he lets out, without even realizing it. “Should I take that as a no again ?”. Tony’s voice echoes in Peter’s brain but never gets analyzed. The boy’s still frozen, his phone hanging in his hand, the sound of his beating heart ringing in his ears.

“Peter ? Fri just told me your heartbeats are unsually high, are you okay ?”. And this time, that wakes him up. “Wh-what ? Oh.. no that’s- im okay, it’s just- MJ!”, Peter stutters as an answer. He swears he can hear Tony’s frowning’s expression in the silence that follows.

“I mean, she- MJ, she sent me a funny, a text, it reminded me of something and I huh.. yeah. No, that’s yes.”. Another long silence. that’s a yes. Peter feels like he just answered a proposal. “Yes as in, im free for tonight, mr. Stark.”, Peter finishes, his cheeks burning with shame.

“Great. And Im not gonna question what just happened, alright ? Be ready for 7.”, Tony simply says before hanging up. Just like that. Just like he didn’t just made Peter’s brain completely fry.

“Did Tony just asked me on a date?”, Peter asks himself out loud, alone in his bedroom, his jaw hanging in shook. What the hell ?

That’s how Peter started the most stressful day of his entire life. Exams ? Spiderman ? Thanos ? Forget all of this, he has a freakin’ date with Tony freakin’ Stark, that is the real stressful shit. He spends half of the day walking in his apartment.

Around 3, he starts to panic hard because Tony said fancy. But Peter doesn’t have fancy clothes. He stayed in front of his phone, hesitating to send Tony something about that or no. He doesn’t want Tony to think he only has kid’s clothes. But then, better this than showing up in a fancy restaurant with a pun-sweat right ?

PP : How should I be dressed for tonight ?

Peter finally sends, not asking but hoping Tony’ll understand what he meant. His smile increases when, 6 minutes after, his phone rings.

TS : Happy is gonna drop you a suit at 5.

Peter’s inside catches fire at that. The words sugar daddy are ringing in his ears. Tony is gonna buy him a suit. Just for tonight. For their date. “Oh my god, imma be sick.”, Peter mumbles. His heart has been beating so fast since the call. And he feels like he’s gonna throw up. And he’s also happy. So happy. But- a date ? With Tony Stark ? Peter has been in love with the man for- he can’t even remember. Of course at first it was just a fan crush, then a real crush, then it bloomed into full love. And Peter never thought he could had a chance. But- Peter’s thoughts get cut by the entry door opening.

It’s May. And it’s been 5 hours now that Peter is combusting with impatience all alone in his apartment that he just can’t help himself. As soon as May starts taking to him, he blurts out : “I’ve got a date tonight!”

That’s how the hundreds of questions start. May knows he’s gay. However, May doesn’t know he loves Tony and she definitely doesn’t know the actual date is with Tony. So when she starts asking who he is, Peter realizes it maybe wasn’t the best idea. So after receiving the 5 hugs May felt like she needed to give him for that, the boy sends another text to Tony.

PP : Can we meet at the park next to my building please?

And then, he lets May giving him advices for tonight. “Alright, I get why you won’t tell me. Even if Im a little concerned, I get it. Where is he taking you ?”, she asks, a big smile on her face. “I don’t know actually, he just said it was somewhere fancy.”, Peter answers, trying not to let his smile gets to him too much.

“And how are you gonna get dressed ? You maybe can try some of Ben’s suit ?”. And Peter’s heart warms at that proposition. “It’s alright May, I already have something to wear actually.”

The two next hours aren’t better, they’re worst. May continues giving him advices. For his sakes, Peter swears himself to never use some. Then he takes a shower, the longest he never took. Just in case. He wants all of his skin to smell good for Tony. His cheeks brun at this thought. Are him and Tony gonna.. ? Now his whole body is warming up and Peter can���t help but jerking off at the thought of him and Tony going home tonight and having some fun.

When Happy leaves him a text saying the suit is in the mailbox, the boy sneaks to get it. Once the suit is on him, Peter can’t stop looking at his own reflection in the mirror. It’s a light blue suit and fuck, he does look good in those. His whole skin is shivering because Tony bought it to him. Tony’s money is touching his skin. The boy snorts at his own weird thoughts. But he can’t help it.

A small whine escapes his lips when he realizes there’s still 1h30 before Tony comes to get him. And that’s the absolute worst feeling ever. Peter tries to work, to watch a tv show, to talk with May, to phone MJ or Ned, to build lego, but nothing is able to make the time look less slow. And the more the time passes, the more Peter’s stomach gets stress crushed.

When 7 pm is finally approaching, Peter’s not even sure he can breath anymore. “Peter, hey- Peter, please can you stop ?”, May finally snaps and Peter turns to her, ready to burst at her that she doesn’t know how he feels right now, but she shushes him before he can even start.

“Everything’s gonna go well, angel. But please, you’re gonna faint before you’ll even get there, alright ? You’re handsome my baby, he’s gonna love you.”, May tries to calm him by hugging him. He was about to answer her when the clock beside them shows that 7 pm is in 5 minutes. Peter jumps saying he’s gonna be late and rushes out of the apartment.

He went down the stairs, crossed the street and went to the park in a 1 minute time. His heart is menacing to get out of his chest. And when he finally hears Tony’s voice behind him, his whole body jerks and he turns to the voice.

His heart stops again. Holy fuck, Tony is- he’s god-handsome. Peter’s jaw opens and doesn’t close.

“You’re doing alright Peter ?”, Tony asks, after a few seconds. Peter tries. He tries really hard. But Tony is in front of him, in a grey suit that looks absolutely heavenly hot on him, and they’re going on a date and-

“Peter ?”, this time, he forces himself to answer before Tony decides to leaves him there. “Hum… huh- yeah? Yeah you look good. I- I mean.. Im good! Im doing… good.”. He watches in horror as Tony tries to not laugh at him. “Blue suits you, by the way.”, Tony comments and Peter tries not to blush or smile at that.

Then the older one shows him the car behind them and Peter hurries inside.

“So. Why the park ?”, the man asks after a few seconds. Peter’s brows frown in confusion. “Forget it. Everything alright Pete ? You look… tense. Did something happened while you patrolled ?”. And this time, Peter’s sure he’s blushing. Why can’t he just relax ? Okay it’s a date but it shouldn’t be any different than the rest of the time they spend together.

“Yeah.. Yeah im sorry I was just a bit nervous, you know… I… Im happy you invited me tho! So.. where are we going ?”, the boy tries to show he’s grateful for this. The last thing he wants is Tony thinking he’s not happy about the date.

“It’s an Italian restaurant, my favorite one. You’ll see, everything that’ll get into your mouth tonight will make you fly.”, Tony answers and there’s a silence. Peter’s cheeks burn hot now. Did Tony really said- oh my god. “Im just realizing how it sounds. Maybe not my best choices of words.”, the man laughs. laughs, as if he didn’t created a whole fire in Peter’s body. The boy just prays not to pop up a boner just because of a single sentence.

The rest of the ride is just small talks and when they finally arrive, Peter stays close to Tony, it makes him feel protected. And he likes it. The smile on his face is uncontrollable. He can’t believe he’s on an actual date with Tony Stark. His heart is about to burst from happiness. And the place is stunning, and Tony’s stunning. And Peter sees people watching them and he feels proud. He knows how much people want Tony. But Tony’s there with him.

Once they’re seated, Peter can’t help but stare at Tony who’s in front of him. And the only thing he can think of is that he loves him. But the boy shuts up. Tony didn’t mentioned it being a date yet, and even when he does, Peter can’t just say he loves him already.

When the menu comes, Peter just stare at the Italian names blankly. “I… I don’t understand anything that’s written.” , he murmurs to Tony, a bit ashamed. But the man just fondly snorts in response and translates him the different propositions. But after the explanations, Peter’s still lost as fuck. what the fuck are all of those ?. Tony laughs again, louder this time, noticing Peter’s lost face.

“You know what, I’ll order for you. How does that sound ?”. The boy’s heart stops and he flushes different shades of red at once. Tony is gonna order for him. “That- That sounds good. Im sorry I don’t know what are those.”, Peter finally says. “Hey, none of that Pete. Plus, Im kinda excited for you to try what I’ll pick for you.”, the man says, like it wasn’t making Peter squirm in his chair. Oh my god, he’s gonna die.

To give himself a bit of capacity, he pretends to read the menu once again and pouts noticing the prices aren’t there. Meaning it must be like, super expensive. He knows Tony can pay, and there’s a side of him that likes it. Because it’s easier for him to call Tony Daddy in his head. But there’s also a part of him that hates it because it feels like he can’t complete. May and Peter are kinda broke and Peter would have liked to be able to pay a restaurant to Tony too.

“What’s up with the pout ?”. Shit. “N-Nothing, mr. Stark really. It’s just… you know, I can’t… it’s a fancy restaurant and May and I aren’t…”, he begins but Tony cuts him. “Im stopping you right there, Peter. Im sorry if me picking a fancy restaurant embarrassed you, I should have asked where you wanted to go first. But don’t worry about that, okay ? Im not asking you to pay for anything, I invited you there.”. Peter feels his heart beating hard in his chest. “No, Im really happy to be there, I swear! I just… I just don’t want- I don’t know, forget it.”.

Tony does what Peter asked him, he drops the subject and start talking about Peter’s project in the lab. And that, it allows Peter to relax a bit. Because it suddenly feels like a normal time with Tony. And not a date. Well, a date yes but not an awkward one. And if Peter chokes on his own saliva when Tony orders in fucking italian in front of him, then at least, the man acts like he didn’t see it. And Peter’s happy there’s a table because explaining to Tony why he’s hard right now would have been real awkward.

It becomes a bit more awkward again when the meals arrive. Because Peter gets aroused by how good the food Tony picked for him is. Because Tony looks genuinely satisfied with the fact Peter moans at every bite he takes. And because watching the gorgeous man eating in front of him is also a whole show.

Peter is too occupied staring at Tony to realize he’s missing his mouth with the next bite he takes. The man laughs gently at him and Peter wants to fucking hide under the table because now Tony’ll think he doesn’t know how to eat.

“That’s good huh ? Knew you would like it.”, Tony smiles, after a minute of silence. The smile on Peter’s lips grows automatically. He likes that. He really likes that Tony knew what he’d like. “That’s… the best thing I ever ate mr. Stark!”, Peter answers, beaming with happiness. Even the awkward moments can’t ruin this for him. He’s so happy.

The rest of the evening goes well. So well even. But the more the end approaches, the more Peter can’t help but asks himself if something’s gonna happen or not. Like… Is Tony gonna bring him home ? Is he gonna kiss him ? Even the thought of that is enough to make Peter’s head feel dizzy. He can’t even let himself imagine something more than a kiss would happen. And if he does, he’s gonna combust in front of Tony. And before his mind decides to picture them having sex, Peter shakes his head, his cheeks reddening with both shame and want. He had so many dream about Tony, so many wet dreams about Tony. He has been dreaming about the man since even before they actually meet. And Peter feels like he would cum the second Tony lays a hand on him. That’d be pretty awkward. And then, Peter can’t help but wonder what Tony sees in him. He’s nobody. Tony can have whoever he wants, and still, he chose him. Does Tony know he’s a virgin still ? Would he care ?

“Okay, have you even listened to a word I just told you ?”, Tony asks, a jaded look on his face. Peter realizes the man has been talking to him and blushes in shame. “Im so sorry! I was thinking… I got lost in my thoughts, sorry.”, he apologizes, hoping Tony won’t think he’s boring him.

“Wow, he’s getting invited to the fanciest restaurant ever and still act like it’s not enough. What more do you want Parker ?”, Tony jokes and one part of Peter is happy he didn’t get upset. Another part of him just wanna scream he wants Tony to kiss him once they’re out of the restaurant. But what if Tony wanna take his time ? He doesn’t wanna sound as desperate as he really is.

“I’d really love for a car.”, Peter jokes back, glad he made Tony smile. “Ask and you shall receive.”. And Peter doesn’t know how honest Tony is with this. He hopes the man is joking. But Tony’s intense look in his eyes when Peter said those words is enough to make him realize the man is serious about this. “I was joking, mr. Stark.”, the boy adds, just to be sure he won’t receive a car tomorrow. Tony doesn’t answer anything to that, which is kinda weird, but Peter doesn’t think too much about it.

When the server comes back and asks if they want a dessert, Tony answers for him again. No. This time Tony doesn’t wait for Peter to even asks him, he just orders him something in Italian again.

“I could have asked him for ice cream you know…”, Peter whines, faking a pout. “Oh so he understands Italian now.”. And the smile Tony had on his lips almost all night is making Peter heart feel so light.

“I don’t, but I don’t think I need a italian degree to understand ‘gelato’, old man.”, Peter teases, making himself feels hot all over his body. He sees Tony’s gaze changing a bit too. Is Tony loving this as much as him ? “Brat.”, the man accuses and Peter stops himself to make a punishment joke. They’re not there yet.

The boy is now eating his damn vanilla ice cream and can’t help the blush creeping on his face again. Tony is staring at him. Not watching. Staring. Peter’s senses can feel his intense gaze on him, on his face. And the boy feels like he doesn’t know how to eat anymore. He’s sure he’s putting ice cream everywhere on his lips and wants to die about it.

“Y-You didn’t want to take something ? Huh… dessert or- or coffee ?”, he stutters, to make things less intense, because Peter is seconds away to moan under Tony’s gaze. “Im all good, thanks Pete.”, Tony answers and the boy doesn’t know if he’s dreaming or not but Tony’s voice sounded more… low ? He goes back to eating his ice cream, hoping it’s the last ice cream he’ll ever eat in his life.

When they finally go out, Peter feels drunk. He’s so happy, so nervous and so horny at the same time. He’d say so in love but let’s not brings more awkward to this. They walk in silence to Tony’s car. And just before Tony can open his car, Peter blurts out : “Thank you so much for the dinner mr. Stark! It was really really good and really fun. I liked it… a lot.”, he says, knowing he’s blushing again but doesn’t care at this point. Maybe Tony is waiting for him to make the first move. Because he doesn’t wanna rush him.

“Pleasure was mine, Pete.”, the man answers, a soft smile on his lips. And then, Peter doesn’t even realize what his body his doing, but that should be the good time no ? His heart is pounding so fast and loud in his chest, ears and whole body as he leans and kiss Tony. A smack. Just a smack. Because Peter doesn’t even know how to kiss. It was fast, but enough to make Peter’s heart explodes in his chest.

But then he sees Tony’s face. Tony’s frozen and shocked face. Shit. Did it was too soon ? Did it sucked ? Did Tony expected someone who could actually kiss him ? Peter wants to throw up. ”Mr. Stark ?”, he asks faintly.

“Peter. What… What was that ?”, Tony questions, his tone dangerously flat. “I- I thought… Im so sorry I... You know with the date and all, I thought maybe… maybe it was a good time to kiss you, you know ? Im sorry if Im not a g-”, Peter painfully begins but gets cut by Tony. “Wait- A date ? It wasn’t a date.”, the man says, his voice suddenly high. Peter’s blood turns cold in his whole body.

What ?

“Wh- What ?”, he breathes, voice already trembling. Oh god no. No no no no, this can’t be happening.

“This. That’s- Christ, Peter. It wasn’t a date. I- I didn’t- We’re not- Fuck.”, Tony panics, his voice almost screaming the last bit, stepping back from Peter. Peter who’s still frozen, watching what’s happening in front of him without being able to move.

“Oh god, Im so sorry if I made you think it was a date, kid. Im- It wasn’t my intention.”, Tony tries to apologize, clearly still panicking. The only word echoing in Peter’s brain is kid. Tony hasn’t called him like that for months. And now he’s doing it again.

“Peter, kid. Shit, you can’t cry- I- Peter Im so sorry I shouldn’t-”. And it’s only when Tony says that that Peter realizes tears are rolling down his cheeks. His heart feels heavy in his chest. No. His heart feels completely crushed in his chest. And the humiliation. The boy still stands there, only capable of crying in front of Tony, who’s panicking on his own.

“Kid, you- Im sorry, Im not mad I swear, we can’t- We just can’t. We’re not… that.”. And Peter’s heart feels like breaking again. “D-Don’t call m-me k-kid.”, and it’s the only thing Peter can lets out before fully starting to cry. Small hiccups escaping his lips.

Tony watches in horror, unable to do much. “Peter, im begging you- stop crying, im not mad, you’re- kid I-”, the man starts and if he wasn’t so much in pain, Peter would have been genially shocked to see Tony struggling so much to speak. “Stop ca-calling me a kid!”, the boy almost screams, surprising both himself and Tony. The man steps back again. There’s a silence. A loud one. A painful one.

“Im sorry. It’s my fault if you thought- Jesus, it’s my fault if you mistook this, Peter. Im sorry I let you think this was a… a date. You can’t- it’s not on you, Im not mad.”, Tony speaks again. But it’s only words. Peter’s brain shut himself. He doesn’t understand what Tony is saying to him. He just wants to die.

“But- But I lo-”, he starts, desperately, only to get cut by the man in front of him again. “No. No you don’t. You- Jesus ki- Pete, it’s not-” and there’s a silence again. “It’s not wh-what ? True ? H-How would you know ? And wh-why… what was al-all of this for if-if it was- n’t a.. a da-date ?”, the boy desperately questions, in between cries. Tony’s pained expression intensifies. “Pete, stop crying.”.

“Answer me!”, the younger one screams. He can’t believe Tony. It’s not true. Tony is just being- delusional.

“Christ why are you doing this ? Peter, it was just- just… us.”. Peter never heard Tony’s voice sounding so desperate before today. But he can’t care. He feels like he’s been crushed by a fucking plane right now.

“Us ? Ye-yeah and Im- im saying that us, is me lo-lo-loving you and you- you looking at me with- with that look in your eyes.”. And Peter can sees Tony’s eyes watering. Again, it’d be the first time he sees Tony crying, but he still can’t care. The man just steps back and sighs, passing both of his hands on his face.

“You stopped calling me ki-kid. And- and you order for me- and- and sh-shit! I- I know you like it. I know i-it because I can se-see it, mr. Stark. I- I want- I want you… pl-please.”, Peter cries even harder now, his voice constantly cut by cries. “Please.”, he begs again. And it’s even more painful because Tony doesn’t answers anything. The man just stand in front if him, completely frozen, with a pained expression on his face. But he doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t deny it. Why doesn’t he deny it ?

And suddenly, Tony’s warms hands are on his cheeks, trying to wipes the endless tears coming out of Peter’s eyes. But the sensation of the hand on his cheeks only makes Peter cry more. “Peter… Peter, baby.. please. You- fuck. You have to stop, alright ?”, Tony whispers, so close to him, but yet so far. baby.

Peter doesn’t realize he leans on the touch, he doesn’t realize Tony’s other hand is clenching hard on his light blue jacket. And despite everything that is happening right now, Peter only wants them to kiss. A real kiss.

But the next thing he feels is Tony’s strong body against him. The man is hugging him and Peter can’t help but hug him back, his cries still loudly getting out. “Peter, please. I can’t. You know I can’t. Im so sorry. I shouldn’t have invited you, I shouldn’t- I shouldn’t have let myself- I can’t.”, Tony murmurs those things in Peter’s ear, tightening his arm around the boy’s body and it only hurts Peter more. Why is Tony saying all of this ? What does it mean ?

“Please…”. It’s all what Peter is capable to say. Please love me. He feels Tony’s body, Tony’s warmth getting away and hates it. And the boy can’t take it. It hurts so much. So before Tony can even answer with another apologize, Peter’s wrists move on their own, and the next second he’s not there anymore, he’s on the top of the building next to the restaurant. He has to get away from Tony. He can’t stay there.

And if Peter hasn’t jumped on another building right away, he would have been able to hear Tony whispering on his own. “Pete… I wished you’d understand why this can’t be a date, why I can’t let you love me back.”, finally letting himself cry now that Peter ran away.

second square for @starkerfestivals 🙈🙈

alright so first of all im so sorry for this fjndldl 😭😭😭 this bingo is challenging me so much tho bc i wrote my first tony fucking peter and now i wrote my first sad ending

its just the first thing that came to my mind seeing ‘not a date’ so i followed my idea

also i edited it three fucking times bc tumblr was being a bitch with me today 🔪

[danniburgh]

Before the sun shines onto us

I wrote a Pedro Pascal fic, I’m aware I’m sick, I have therapy tomorrow

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Fem!reader

Summary: It's been a long time since they saw each other, they lived so many things together that neither of them could change not forget, yet for her, returning to the house that they shared for so long, while the world was ending, was way more necessary than she had expected. or Pedro didn't expect to see his ex-wife standing on the front door, he didn't expect her to ask about the recent news or to compliment his home decour style just as if nothing had happened. But given the fact that the world was ending, he let her in anyway.

Word count: +6.2k

Warnings: real people fiction!!!!, narrated in third person basically the end of the world, angst, mentions of ch*ld de*ath (tw at the beginning of the scene), science, made up space shit

A/N: i made myself cry like four times writing this, im not sorry, this was mainly inspired by “rocks that bleed” a short film that lives in my mind rent free since the first time i saw it

Masterlist // Read in ao3

She came out of the door of the hotel salon, her big handbag was hanging from her right arm, her small suitcase was being rolled with the left one, she encountered one of her colleagues that was also getting out and the man waved at her with a smile.

"Hey, you wanna grab a coffee with the rest of us?" He kind of screamed the question, trying to make himself heard over the voiced of all the people that were getting out and gathering at the entrance of the salon, he smiled back at him and shook her head.

"I have to go back home, Ben, but I'll grab that coffee next time, for sure" The man laughed.

"See you next year, then" She waved at him as she walked down the corridor towards the elevators, she rushed to the only one open despite her high heels and one of the people already inside held the door for her.

"Thanks" She took out her phone from her bag and dialed the most recent number on her calls history, her assistant picked up in the first tone. "Hey Jessi, is the ticket ready?" she asked, looking at the small screen on top of the elevator, impatient to reach the first floor.

"Yes misses Balmaceda, ready for you to pick it up and the flight is at seven thirty" the girl on the other side of the line said, the elevator door opened and she was the first one to walk out of it.

"Thank you, see you in the morning" She said, hanging up, while she was walking towards the hotel main entrance she dialed her husband's phone number, she heard his voice while giving her suitcase to one of the bellboys, who was holding the door open for her to get out.

"Taxi?" the boy said, and she nodded.

"Hey, babe, just got out of the seminar" On the other side of the line she could hear some giggles and on the background she heard a children's song that she immediately recognized.

"Oh finally, how was it?" She smiled at her husband's response, she noticed his agitated voice. A taxi pulled over next to her and the driver got out to help the bellboy with the suitcase.

"Well, you know, doctor stuff" She said, teasingly "They amazingly discovered yet another protein that produces cerebral cancer, but now I'm on my way home" He let out a sigh and she got inside the car.

"You okay, Pedro?" The taxi driver got inside as well and looked at her "Airport, please" The man nodded and started the engine.

"Ash please stop changing the channels" She smiled at the mention of their daughter "Yeah I'm fine, just tired, what time you're arriving?"

"Around ten, how's my baby?" She asked.

"She's being a torment right now, she didn't let me read the script I received" Pedro said with a laugh "She has bedtime in two minutes" he raised his voice, more to the little girl that was running around the living room than to his wife, She smiled and the taxi made a turn.

"Awe, I miss my baby" She murmured while looking out the window.

"And your baby missed you, we both do" Pedro said back, she didn't respond, a bright light outside caught her attention.

"The moon looks very shiny" She whispered, surprised.

"What?"

"The moon, it looks very, very shiny" She emphasized "Way more than normal"

"Amor, it's the moon, it's always shiny"

"No, Pedro, it looks... Shinier than usual"

"What do you even mean?"

"Go look at it"

"I'm not gonna look at it" He laughed "It's just the goddamn moon."

"Honey please, it looks odd, just indulge me" She insisted.

"It does look weird" The taxi driver said while making another turn, leaving the moon behind them.

"See? even the driver thinks so" She giggled, turning on the seat to see it again through the back windshield

"I mean I guess it looks kind of unusual" Pedro said.

"Told you" She said, he laughed at her cocky voicetone. The taxi made yet another turn and she could see the airport. "Okay babe, gotta go, see you later, give Ashley a kiss from me"

"Can't wait to see you, love you"

"Love you too"

****

She turned off the car's ignition and looked at the town house through the copilot's window, she hadn't been inside in so long it almost looked... Unknown to her.

She hesitated to open the car door and get out but she did it anyway. She stopped and looked down at that specific patch of concrete on the street, and had to force herself to look away from it, as she could feel her throat getting clogged already.

She walked slowly to the end of the steps and stopped again to look at the front door, it was worn down and a bit darker than she recalled, she walked up the steps one by one until she got to the front door, it was there where she noticed how the street was oddly quiet, dark, only lightened by the street lights and the overshiny moon, very calm, the only noise that she could hear was the wind playing with the few leaves left on the trees and the muffled sound that came from inside the house.

She hesitated to knock on the door for a second but she did it anyway. One, two, three small hits with her knuckles.

The door opened and there he was, tall as ever, handsome as ever.

"Hi" She said, he looked surprised, she didn't know if it was because she was there or not, she noticed his beard and her stomach made a turn because of how much she liked it, she also noticed the bag below his eyes and she wanted to cry because his damn eyes were as warm and deep as she remembered.

"Hi" Pedro responded.

"Did you hear?" She asked, he tilted his head, implicitly telling her to elaborate on her question "About the sun?"

He stood there, looking at her, she then had that sensation on her chest she hadn't felt in so much, the expectation, the tension, she wanted to know so bad what was going on inside his head, she had seen so many brains in her career but with his, she just wanted to read his thoughts so she could know if she wanted her there or if she had to leave and be alone while everything happened.

He then nodded slightly and stepped to the side to let her in.

She hesitated to go inside for a split second, but she did it anyway, she walked slowly, taking in all the changes he had made to the place, new paint, some new furniture, it even smelled different.

She jumped, startled, when he reached her shoulders from behind to take off her jacket, not because he scared her, but because she hadn't felt his touch in way too long.

****

The taxi pulled over in front of her house, she paid while opening the car door, getting out and taking out the suitcase from inside the car.

"Keep the change" She sad, closing the taxi door, she rushed over to the end of the steps and walked them up as fast as her heels allowed her to, already with the key on her hand.

She opened the door and got inside, the house was silent and the only light on was a lamp on the living room, she took out her shoes and dropped them on the entrance, she walked to the kitchen, lifting some of Ashley's toys in the way, on top of the counter was a tinfoil covered dish, and she smiled at the small note stuck to it that had a smiley face drawn on.

She felt two hands on her waist that startled her, and then a soft pair of lips on her cheek.

"You scared me" She said laughing, she turned around on his embrace and faced Pedro, already in his pajamas.

"Good" He smiled at her and hugged her tighter, she stood on her tiptoes to give him a kiss, using her hands to caress his biceps and go all the way to the nape of his neck.

"Hi, movie star"

"How was your flight, Doctor?" He asked softly on her lips, then he put his forehead on hers.

"Flight-ey" She smiled, he nodded softly as he left his hands wander on her waist, her hip and her lower back  "I'm wrecked"

"Me and you both" He gave her another kiss, this one hungrier than the last one, but also slower.

"Where's my baby?"

"Already asleep"

"I wanna see her" He nodded and kissed her one last time before breaking the tight embrace, he grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the kitchen.

"Vamos"

They got up the stairs in silence, she holding his left hand and he holding her suitcase with his right one, she made a turn to Ashley's room while Pedro walked to their bedroom, she opened the door trying not to be loud, and walked towards the girl's bed, sitting on it beside her.

Pedro left the suitcase and came back to his daughter's room, watching as his wife was caressing softly the little girl's soft brown hair while whispering to her words he couldn't listen, he smiled and leaned on the door frame, crossing his arms, she turned to see him.

"Can you believe we made this wonder?" She murmured, pointing at the little girl fast asleep on the bed.

****

Pedro didn't like how he was feeling about her being there, he knew he was supposed to be angry, if not, maybe a bit offended, but he wasn't. He liked her being there, in the place that was theirs, in the house that belonged to her.

"I like the color" She said, pointing at the wall and looked at him for a brief moment. "It doesn't even look like the same house" She sounded amazed.

"Yeah, I had it painted last year" He walked past her, still with her jacket on his hands, he left it on the armchair near the hallway "You wanna sit down?" She nodded and sat on the couch near the window. He stood there, just trying to figure out what to say or what to do, he scratched his beard and then sat down on the other armchair, next to the couch she was sitting on.

Pedro looked at her as her eyes wandered across everything that was within her sight but him, he noticed rather quickly that she was avoiding looking at him. He was astonished by just her mere presence there.

She was stift, she didn't know what to say to him or even if she should even speak at all, while she was looking at the new coat of paint, she noticed a big painting of a beach hanging on the wall near the dining table, it looked cold, it looked out of place.

"How's your dad?" She asked, looking down at her hands, or her shoes, he couldn't tell.

"He's okay" He responded, she fidgeted her fingers, he knew what she was really asking "He's gonna spend it with my brothers, Nico flew to Chile when the rumors started" She nodded.

"And Javi?" Pedro sighed, he knew why she was asking about his family, he knew she cared about them, but he also knew that she was making time, she didn't want to tell him yet why she was there.

"She's at home, she's with the in-laws"

Then the silence fell on them once again, she was just sitting there, and he knew she could feel her gaze on her, she always could, and he didn't think her body had already forgotten how his stare felt.

She tried to control herself, she didn't want to break more, then she realized why the beach painting looked so out of place. That wall used to be the place where half a dozen pictures of Ashley were hung. She felt the clogging in her throat again and she felt the familiar stinging on the back of her eyes, for a moment she wanted to yell at him and ask him where all of her pictures went, but she couldn't, she wasn't ready.

"I wanted to go back home" She mentioned in a hushed-tone, still looking down "But then they announced the state borders were closing so I had to stay"

Pedro didn't say anything, he wanted her to speak more, he wanted her to tell him what was she doing there after three years, he wanted her to explain to him why she did what she did without him having to ask her for answers.

She then lifted his head and looked at him, she was crying.

****

She felt a tiny, cold pair of hands on her cheeks, then a small pair of lips kissing her forehead, she smiled without opening her eyes as the tiny hands caressed her hair.

"Mommy" She heard near her ear "Are you awake?" She smiled at the question and then shook her head. She heard giggles. "Yes you are."

"Wake up papi" She whispered while opening one of her eyes to see her little girl kneeling on the edge of the bed, with her big brown eyes small, her hair all rowdy and her pajamas wrinkled. Ashley wineded her grin and she helped her cross her to get to the middle of the bed. Pedro was on his tummy, hugging the pillow, and Ashley sat on his back.

"Papi, despierta, wake up" She started screaming and jumping in his back, Pedro growled and reached to the girl with one arm to hug her off his back and down to the bed.

"Papá tiene la espalda muy jodida, niña" He said with a laugh while Ashley was laughing as he tickled her. (Daddy's back is very fucked, girly)

"It's my cumpleaños" Ashley screamed, wanting her father to free her from his tickly fingers. (It's my birthday) Pedro stopped the tickle assault and looked at his wife, that was enjoying the show from the comfort of the other side of the bed.

"Why do you let her hurt me like this?" He asked with a smile on his face.

"It's her cumpleaños" She shrugged, Pedro laughed at the response.

"I turn this many" The girl, still in her father's arms, raised up a hand with three lifted fingers.

"You're getting old" Pedro screamed while resuming his tickle attack.

"¡Para, papá!" Ashley screamed again (Stop, dad) and giggled out of his arms, crawling to her laughing mom and sitting on her lap. "Mommy, I love you, can we have ice cream for breakfast?" Her mom laughed at the attempted bribe.

"What if we have it after breakfast?" Ashley shook her head. "No? Maybe with the breakfast?" Pedro laughed and sat on the bed while the girl nodded effusively, then she opened her arms and Ashley fell into them "Happy birthday, my sunshine"

Pedro saw his two girls with a smile on his face and got closer to hug them both, giving his wife a kiss on the cheek and then one to his daughter on the head.

"Feliz cumpleaños, pulga" (Happy birthday, flea [i swear it's endearingly in spanish])

****

"I called my mom" She said, wiping off a tear that was beginning to fall on her cheek and looking away, still trying to look for pictures of Ashley, Pedro shifted on the chair "I actually spoke to her for almost four hours" He nodded, not knowing where she was going on with this, but wanting to hear more "And we talked about us, and about how much we love each other" She left out more tears as she spoke "She asked me to forgive her for all the things she did wrong" Pedro was absort on how much it hurt him to see her like that, and didn't even tried to hide it, "We just wanted closure" she said, and then he saw her rubbing her hands together as if they were cold "She's gonna be alone, y'know, for this?" She gestured with her hand, making a circle "But she didn't want me to be alone"

Pedro then looked at her more intensely, trying to analize her as she wiped her tears away and looked around the house, searching for something. He didn't know if he wanted her to elaborate more on what she talked about with her mom, but he did know what she was looking for.

He stood up and walked towards her, she felt a shiver down her spine as he kneeled on the other side of the couch and opened the curtain. She turned on her seat and saw three small picture frames put neatly on the edge of the window. She felt her shoulders drop as he sat next to her and grabbed the first one and gave it to her.

"Her first steps" He said, she nodded, looking at the picture through the wetness of her eyes. She blinked and a tear fell on the glass, she wiped it and saw him grab the next one.

"That's on her third birthday" He said, softly, she took the picture and left out a sob, she covered her mouth with her free hand and then looked up to the ceiling.

"I thought-"

"I know" He interrupted her, standing up and taking a deep breath and turning his back to her "I just don't like to see them all the time" He said, she nodded even though he didn't see her.

"She has your eyes" She whispered, he looked at her and she did the same, she saw his eyes fill with tears and then he said something she wish she didn't hear.

"Had"

****

[tw]

She was writing a report on her laptop when she heard a knock on the door, then she heard Pedro's voice from outside.

"Can you help us with the groceries, please" He yelled, she let out a laugh and closed the computer, walked towards the front door and opened it to see her husband carrying more groceries than he could handle on the doorstep and her daughter trying to help with three others on the sidewalk, she moved to let Pedro inside and got out to carry the ones left.

"Honey get inside, please, it's freezing" She said, grabbing two bags and waiting for the girl to walk up the stairs.

"I wanna help" Ashley said, trying to lift a heavy bag.

"I think I over-bought" Pedro said behind her, walking down the stairs, she turned to see him.

"Oh do you?" She laughed, her husband took the bags she was holding and gave her a kiss. "I'm gonna grab the other one" Pedro nodded and turned to leave the bags inside. "C'mon Ash, inside" She said as she turned around to grab the bag that was left.

The bag was tilted to the side, there were two tuna cans on the floor and she saw Ashley walking towards the street to pick up another can that was rolling away. She saw everything in slow motion when in fact it happened within a minute.

"¡Ashley leave that!" She screamed at her daughter, rushing to grab her, the child stopped in the middle of the street and showed the can to her mom with a victory smile on her face. She tried to run to Ashley that hadn't seen the suv that was already a feet away from her.

Pedro only heard a long scream, the sound of car breaks, then a deep sob.

He rushed out of the house, the first thing that he saw was the suv, stopped in the middle of the street, then whom he assumed was the driver, talking desperately into the phone, then he saw his wife crouched on the asphalt, holding... Ashley.

Pedro tried to walk towards them but his legs didn't respond, he dropped to his knees in the middle of the sidewalk while he saw his wife sitting in the middle of the street holding their little girl to her chest screaming her name as loud as she could. He felt more cold than he had ever felt in his life, he felt his eyes wanting to pop out of his head, he felt like sticking his hand into his chest to squish out his heart, he wanted to stop looking at the scene, he didn't want to see Ashley's blood on the concrete anymore, he didn't want to hear his wife screaming her lungs out calling for her baby, he didn't want to see his little girls body being ripped away from her mother. But there he was, seeing it all, hearing it all, feeling it all.

Pedro sat there while his wife sat on the street, the ambulance came, the police did too, their neighbours showed up as well and they just sat there, seeing without seeing, hearing without hearing.

By the time the paramedics made the call, pronounced Ashley and took her away, his wife had stopped crying, was being helped by a police officer to stand up and then Pedro did too. He walked towards her and slowly reached for her face, she didn't say anything, he didn't say anything. She leaned into his chest and he held her as tight as his body responded him. They stood there for a while, the sun went down and then the moon lighted up, she looked down and the bag of groceries was put into the edge of the stairs.

"The moon" Pedro said, she looked up "It looks unusual again"

****

"Had" She corrected.

He stood there in silence, she was holding the picture to her chest, that image reminded him of so much that he closed his eyes instictevly.

"Are you gonna tell me why you're here?" He asked softly. She looked at him, astounded that he wasn't angry, or exasperated, astounded that he was just... sad, she looked at him, wondering why she could still read him as well as she did back when they were together.

"I..." She started, he looked at her and saw her face, puffy and red from crying and her eyes, even so watery, expecting and hopeful. "I don't wanna be alone" She let out a sob and then hid her face into her hands, feeling stupid, pathetic, feeling lonely, as well as sad, so very sad, because she knew he had all the right to make her leave, she knew that if he wanted, he could tell her to fuck off and throw her out to spend the last time alone.

"Okay" He said, she looked at him, thanking him with one look, he stared at her for what it seemed hours and then nodded. "I'll bring you some water"

She saw him walking to the kitchen, she heard him grab a cup, opening the fridge and pouring water into it, then he came back and handed it to her.

"It's filtered, don't worry" He told her, sitting on the chair again, she nodded and took a sip, then left it on the floor, by the end of the couch.

"Do they have any idea when it's gonna start?" She asked, more out loud than directly to him, he shrugged.

"They have no fucking idea of anything" He answered.

"Are you mad?" She asked him "About how's gonna end?" He frowned at the way she asked, and actually thought of it because he didn't know.

"I guess I am" He said "There was so much I wanted to do, y'know" He scratched his beard and moved to lean on his hand, putting his elbow on his knee "You heard they closed the movie business when the news broke?" She lifted her eyebrows in surprised, she was so out of the loop "Everything was shut down, it was fucking unbelievable" He said.

"When was the last time you filmed anything?" She asked, he grinned.

"About eight months ago, when they announce the exact date." He said, looking at her, he felt how they were starting to loosen up a bit, and so he didn't want to waste any more of the short amount of time they had, either together or alive. "Why did you leave?"

****

When he entered the kitchen there was smoke coming out of the oven, he quickly turned it off and opened it along with the stractor to try to get rid of most of the smoke. She was standing next to the fridge, looking at nothing, holding an oven mitt close to her chest.

"Are you ok?" He asked, he knew it was the most stupid question he could ask at the moment, and he understood when she didn't even acknowledge it. He stood there for a second, wondering and pondering if he could walk towards her and hug her, wondering and pondering if she would take the hug or push him away once again as she had done for the past few months.

He decided to give it a chance and walked towards her, though he didn't hug her, he just stood next to her.

She let out a sob and slowly shoved the oven mitt into his chest, walking away.

Pedro held the mitt and he recognized the drawing it had, it was one of many projects Ashley had made in school. He went after her, she was standing in the middle of the living room, looking at all the pictures of Ashley the had on the wall. He went for it and tried to hug her waist from behind, she let out a sigh and took his arms and unmade the embrace. He closed his eyes just wanting to know what was going on. She turned to see him with her eyes filled with tears.

"I need to leave" She said, he felt the air leaving his chest.

"What?"

"I can't be here anymore" She sobbed out, he walked towards her again and she stopped hi with a hand on his chest "I'm sorry, I can't" He frowned, he needed an explanation and she knew she was entitled to one but she didn't have the strength to do it.

"I'll go" He said, grabbing her from the arms, she shook her head and let out two thick tears.

"I'm the one leaving" She said, slowly.

"But why" He cried, he didn't realize he was crying as well until he said that. "Please talk to me."

"I can't be in this house anymore, Pedro, I can't be here anymore" She said through her sobs, he tried to hug her again and she refused.

"Let's go together, let's leave together" He pleaded. She shook her head. "Please don't leave"

"I don't wanna be here anymore"

"You don't want to be with me?" He asked, hoping and praying for the answer to be yes.

"No"

He sobbed, she then hugged him and he held her as tight as he had strength to.

"You have her eyes" She sobbed "I can't look at your eyes because all I can see it's her and I can't bear it anymore" He let out a sob all the way from his chest, she wanted to break the hug.

"Please don't leave" He begged "I need you"

"I'm so sorry" She looked at him, grabbed his face and they there were, his damn eyes, the same she had, the same eyes she had stared into when she was holding her body when she left. "I want you to know that I do love you" She said, he closed his eyes and shook his head "And I will never stop, you hear me? I will always love you"

Then she walked up the stairs and left him in the living room, knowing she was packing, knowing she was leaving, knowing then and there that he would be alone.

And when she got down with a suitcase on her hand, he stood there, crying his eyes out, begging her with his eyes not to leave, wanting her to stay, promising it would get better.

But she opened the door, gave him one last stare and wiped a tear away.

"I'll come back for the rest of my things when you're at set" And walked out.

He sat on the couch wondering what he did wrong, while she stood in the doorstep for a while, looking at the very unusual, evergrowingly shiny moon.

****

The question took her by surprise, she knew he wanted to know, she still knew, after three years, he was entitled to an explanation, she owed her one.

"I know it won't make sense" She started "But I saw her in you" He saw her jaw starting to tremble.

"That's the thing" He said, trying to remain calm, trying to forget all those nights he spent screaming into his pillows, trying to forget all the times different directors had to cut scenes because he was inexplicably crying. "I saw her in you, too" She looked down, embarrassed "And I still loved you, I worshiped you" He said, his voice breaking at the last sentence "I fucking died inside a second time when you left"

"Pedro" It was the first time she'd said his name since she arrived, and he didn't like what it made him feel, he had worked hard to try to forget her and keep the happy memories of his little girl intact that he felt like an incredible failure when he felt his heart pounding at the sound of his name on her lips. "I know it wasn't fair-"

"Of fucking course it wasn't fair" He cut her "You left me here, to grieve alone, do you think I didn't suffer after Ashley died?"

"Be both did, you know that, each of us in a different way" She sobbed out.

"And yet, when I needed your support you left" He said, she could hear a tone of irony.

"And what about me?" She said, frowning, realizing that maybe it had been a mistake to knock on his door "Did you actually think I would be grieving just with hugs? And kisses? I needed to talk about it, Pedro, I fucking needed to talk about it, our little girl died, and you just wanted to cuddle up in bed and stay there"

He opened his mouth trying to respond but he couldn't, because it was true. He knew it was his mistake and then and there he realized that he couldn't do anything to repair it.

A blast was heard outside, they both jumped, she looked out the window and saw absolutely nothing. He reached for the tv remote and turned it on.

He put on the news channel while wiping his tears, and sat next to her on the couch, there was a coverage on what they were calling "The Outburst", for them, it was just an announced chronicle of the end of the world, they were talking about the flares of the sun getting increasingly hotter, higher and dangerous.

"Ugh, as if we didn't know" Pedro said, then they ran a simulation of what would happen once the earth reached what, once again, they were calling "Blast Wave Point", the point where the earth and the sun would be closer to each other, the earth would heat up and everything will start catching in flames, then the "Last Flare" would reach and light everything on fire. She reached and grabbed Pedro's hand as the images on the tv showed a render of the end of humanity. He turned off the tv. "Apparently it was just a flare reaching the atmosphere" He said, she nodded and looked at him.

"Are you still mad at me?" She asked, he gripped her hand and shook his head.

"We're past that" He said "Time did its thing" She gave him a soft smile and nodded. "Are you hungry?"

They had dinner together, they talked about what they had done the last three years, he had heard about her new investigation reaching the scientific community before the colleges shut down, she had watched him receive an oscar way before they announced the exact date of The Outburst.

They had laughed at how they actually weren't the first people to notice the increasing reflection of the sun on the moon as the huge star heated to the point of no return, they had reminisce at how they looked at the moon every time they missed each other or every time they missed Ashley.

They cried again, holding each other hands, and asked for forgiveness and forgave one another. They remembered the good times they spent together in over eight years of relationship and the rough times as well.

They watched the president's final address to the people of America, the doomsday goodbye, and laughed at the stiffness of it all, spent hours talking and talking about their childhoods and how they imagine Ashley would be like now, hearing once every few hours the blasts of the sun flares reaching the atmosphere.

"I'm actually glad she's not here to see this shit" She said, Pedro nodded in agreement, they had moved to sit on the floor, the temperature outside was rising and they had started to break a sweat, he lend her one of his t-shirts so she could remove the sweater she was wearing before.

"Don't you wonder how our lives would be if things didn't go as they did?" He asked her, she looked at him and grabbed his hand.

"Maybe I could've learned more español" She teased, he laughed "I do, but when I catch myself doing it I force myself to stop" He looked at her, interested "Because I know it's not healthy, y'know, to live that way in the past" He nodded with a nostalgic smile. And they listened carefully as another flare tried to reach the planet.

"Sounds ominous" He said, she laughed.

"Do you think it'll let us know?" She asked, he moved his body to face hers and shrugged.

"I don't know I've never lived this before" He teased "Why don't you know?" He asked her.

"I'm a neurologist not an astronomer" She answered with a smile, and went on to lean her head on his shoulder. "I really hope it doesn't"

"Why?"

"I don't wanna know, I wanna burn to death without it in my mind" She said, looking at his eyes, making him feel ever so transparent, making him feel like she could read him like an open book.

"What do you wanna have in your mind?" He asked, knowing full well why.

"Ashley" She said, he smiled endearingly "I wanna burn to death while I look into your eyes" She let out. He raised his eyebrows in surprise.

"God, how did I miss you" He spat. She smiled and lifted a hand to cup his face. They could hear two blasts going off at the same time, and the power went down.

"Shit" She said, scared, he pulled her into him, even though the air was hot and thick and they were sweaty and messy, he held her. Another two blasts went off. "Is it time?" She asked, he didn't respond because he didn't know. A set of four blasts were heard, one after the other "It's letting us know" She cried into his chest.

Pedro loosened his grip on her and grabbed her face with both hands, making her see him.

"It's gonna be okay" He said, trying to wipe off her tears with his thumbs "We're together, you're with me now" She nodded as the blasts started to get more frequent and the heat started to get almost unbearable.

"Why the fuck is this happening so fast?" She said, blinking fast to let the tears fall, Pedro shook his head, not knowing what to say, about to burst into tears as well, he would've been lying if he had said he wasn't scared "I need more time" She spat, while trying to cling to him "I need more time with you" He started crying as he heard her saying those words. Somehow made him feel the warmest he had felt in years, even in the middle of the apocalypse. "I love you, Pedro, I never stopped loving you"

"I know, I love you too, I fucking love you" He felt his skin wet with sweat and she finally closed the little distance they had left between them, she kissed him eagerly and clumsily, she kissed him like she hadn't kiss any human being in three years, and as he grabbed her face as close as he could, opening his lips for her to consume the little air he still had inside his chest, he thought there was nowhere else he wanted to be, right there, as the world was lighting up in flames, as the whole human race was being wiped from the planet, there was nothing else he wanted to do, no one else he wanted to embrace, no other thing he wanted to do, than to kiss the love of his life, after so long of not feeling her touch.

If the end of the world had to happen for them to feel each other again, so be it.

[mk-tozier]

BRAT| RICHIE TOZIER X READER

@softbumble asked: I was wanting a smut with Richie x quiet reader where the reader is acting like a brat and Richie decides to teach them some manners.

17-18 years old or whatever age you want idc lmao

I’m sorry if this is bad or not what you wanted, I’m also gonna be kinda slow on requests, I’m trying the best as i can. Also sorry if its short or kinda rushed I’ve been kinda busy!

It’s kinda bad and very repetitive. Thats on me tho cuz its rushed. Again sorry if this is not what you had in mind. I was also writing this with the IQ of 2 because my brain was not working after taking a 1 hour and a half science test and then a math test right after so please excuse the absolute chaos this writing is.

warnings: smut, language, slight choking, degrading, teasing, fingering, overstimulation, idk man’, unedited as hell

I sat in Bill’s living room, next to Richie, sitting on the couch. An hour before me and Richie were at home, fingers tangled in each others hair, He trailed kisses down my neck, leaving hickeys and love bites on my neck as he played with the waistband of my underwear, teasing me and rubbing my clit through it. Then we got a call from Bill asking to hangout and Richie being Richie said we’ll go and left me unsatisfied. So now i was stuck on the couch, bored and horny. “why do you look so upset y/n, did something happen?” Ben asks. “No I’m just tired, thats all.” i said sweetly, but shooting Richie a glare. He smirked, before looking back at the tv which was playing some movie that i had no interest in. Bill and Stan were setting things up, getting snacks from the kitchen, board games from the closet, getting things together. I wasn’t exactly sure what we were doing but we were waiting for them to finish up.

Stan came into the living room, placing a bowl of chips onto the table. “Heyy stanny boyyyyyyyyyyy” I giggled, i have no idea why but i made myself laugh. “hey Y/n” He smiled. “you’re my twin” i say. “how so?” he asks, seeming genuinely interested in what i had to say. “We’re both quiet, sassy, funny” i stop to send Stan a wink at the word ‘funny’ “and cool people” I smile brightly. “i agree” he shakes his head, smiling. I look over to see a annoyed Richie. Hes very easy to make jealous, thats whats fun about him. Stan walked out of the room to continue helping Bill. “flirting with another guy” Richie muttered to himself, in a growl. I put my hand on Richies thigh. He looked over at me. “what’re you doing?” he growls again. “nothing” i shrug. I lay my head on his shoulder.

time skip

i layed with Richie comfortablely, My hand still on his thigh. The boys finished setting everything up, putting on ‘The Goonies’. I moved my hand higher up Richies thigh, closer to his manhood. I looked up at him, Richies jaw clenched. “Richieeee” i whined into his ear. “what?” he replies. “i need youuuu.” i whine again, kissing his neck. “wait until we get home” he mutters. “but i need you now” i brush my hand against his clothed dick, feeling it harden a bit. “baby pleaseee” “I said wait until we get home” Richie growls into my ear. I huff but listen to him, keeping my hand on his thigh. He moves my hand off his thigh and onto the couch. I huff again, annoyed, hes being no fun. I wait a few minutes before putting my hand back on his thigh. “princess, stop it” he whispers into my ear. I ignore him, moving my hand closer to his manhood. “if you dont stop I’ll have to punish you” he growls. I stop moving my hand, leaving it directly on his hard-on. Richie keeps his eyes on the tv, jaw clenched and anger in his eyes. Just what i wanted. I began to palm Richie through his joggers, causing his breath to hitch. He grabbed my wrist, moving it away from my pants. “I just remembered i told my parents that I’d have Y/n over for dinner, they love her so they insist in inviting her to dinners. they’ll kill me if I’m late so we gotta go” Richie says to the losers, they nod understanding. He pulls me through the living room and out the door, shutting it behind him. “what the fuck was that?!?” Richie growls. He gets on his bike, i get on the back, wrapping my arms around him. “answer me” “its your fault, you said we could go to Bill’s, maybe if you werent such a tease then i wouldnt of done what i did” I snap back. “Acting like a brat now, are we?” he says, pedalling faster

When we arrived to the house Richie threw his bike to the ground on his front lawn, he dragged me inside, the door unlocked. Richie pushed me against the wall, attacking my neck. “Made me lie to the losers because you were so needy” He mumbled against my neck. “Needy slut can’t even wait until we get home” Richie says before beginning to suck and lick at my soft spot. I moan from the unexpected contact. “you like that? hmm?”  i nod my head. Richie trails down my neck, kissing my cleavage, his hands roam under my shirt. “Rich, not here” i gasp. “Its my house, we can fuck wheverever the hell i want” He grumbled. Richie picks me up, walking up the stairs, continuing to attack my neck with hickies. He pushes open his bedroom door, kicking it closed when we enter the room, throwing me on the bed. Richie quickly takes off his shirt, throwing it somewhere, revealing his pale skin and skinny frame. He walks over to the bed, getting on top of me, arms on both sides of my body. Richie takes off my shirt, throwing it behind him. He kisses around my bra and down my stomach, kissing the skin right before my shorts/skirt, leaving hickies along the way, getting closer to where i needed him the most. “Rich, please” I whine. “please what? Use your words” “i need you, please” i whine again. “bad girls dont get what they want, beg for it.” He growls into my ear, the raspiness of his voice and the lust in his eyes made me want him more, a wetness pooling in my underwear. Richie unclasped my bra, attacking my breasts, licking and sucking at one nipple as he fondled with the other breast. “please Richie, i need you inside me so bad, your fingers, your tongue, anything, i just need you. so, so, so bad Rich” I beg. “such a needy slut, you’ll use anything to get off, won’t you? so desperate for my cock, huh” Richie kisses down my stomach, removing my shorts/skirt. “you’re so wet for me. you’re my little whore, just begging for my cock.I barely touched you and you’re all riled up?”  Richie smirks.  

He puts his thumb on my clit, rubbing me through my underwear, i moan, satisfaction running through me. Richie rubbed my clit slowly, applying pressure. “please Rich, please i need you inside of me.” I whine. “Such a impatient needy slut, can’t wait to feel my fingers inside of you, falling apart just from a little touch” He pulls down my underwear slightly, blowing air onto my clit. “such a little whore, all soaked” Richie pushes one finger into me, thrusting slowly, i moan loudly, before biting my lip. “faster Rich please” i let out quickly. He speeds up his pace, lifting himself to my lips. Richie connects his lips with mine, kissing me softly, sometimes he can’t help himself and he’ll kiss me softly or passionately, he’ll never admit it but he has a soft spot. Richie curls his finger, hitting a different angle, causing me to moan into the kiss. “you like that? hmm?“ I nod my head moaning, my hips buck, the familiar pit in my stomach growing, i clenched around his finger. Richie enters another finger, thrusting quickly. My hips buck again, i moan loudly, letting my hands go to his hair, tugging. “fuck, rich im gonna cum” i whine, clenching around his fingers. I feel my release pulsing through me. Richie pulls his fingers out, i whine, annoyed. “riiich” “Bad girls dont get to cum” He says before licking his fingers. “you always taste so good princess” Richie connects my lips with his once again, shoving his tongue in my mouth, sucking on my bottom lip. He pulls away, lowering himself. Richie licks a stripe up my pussy unexpectedly. “Rich!” i squeal. He swirls his tongue around my clit and down to my slit. Richie licks my clit slowly, holding my thighs. I bite my lip, holding back the sounds. He begins speeding up the pace, drawing little circles on my thighs with his fingers.

Richie starts licking slower before sucking on my clit, i cover my mouth, whining. Richie sits up, grabbing my hand. “let me hear you, dont cover your mouth. i want everyone to hear what a slut you are, let them know that you’re mine” He says before lowering himself, beginning to suck on my clit again. “Rich! Fuck!” i gasp, causing him to suck on my clit faster, i could feel the pit in my stomach growing already. My hips bucked into his mouth, i tugged on his hair. “Richieee baby im close” i groaned. He sucked faster, licking at my clit, swirling and moving his tongue. My hips bucked again as i let out an aspirated moan. “I’m gonna cum, fuck” i moaned, Richie pulled away quickly. “Riiiich.” I whine. “I told you, bad girls dont get to cum” he leans over me, arms on both sides of me again. “Maybe next time you’ll learn your lesson, flirting with Stan and acting like a brat? You had it coming” Richie whispers into my ear, sending shivers down my spine. “Needy slut” He mumbles. He connects our lips once again, my hands travel to his hair, playing with it. Richie grinds against my heat, groaning into the kiss,his hard on rubbing me through his joggers. “Rich i need you, please. I know I’m a bad girl, please i learned my lesson, I’ll behave i promise”

“Yeah? You want this cock? Huh?” “Yes. Please richie.” “Good girl, begging for me so well. You’re gonna behave?” “Yes i will.  i promise rich. I’ll be patient and i wont flirt with anyone, I’m yours and only yours” Richie groans. He gets off the bed, taking offf his joggers, his dick clearly showing through his boxers, is it up, helping him remove them. “Eager brat” Richie chuckles, he crawls onto the bed, pushing me onto my back. He looks up at me, his tip nearing my entrance. I nod, letting him know to go ahead. Richie slowly enters me, groaning, his precum leaking into my entrance. “So wet and warm for me” he groans. “Rich” i plead. Richie starts to thrust into me slowly, i moan, finally getting the pleasure i wanted. “Can Stanley fuck you this good? Huh?” Richie picks up the pace. I shake my head, whining. “Does his dick fill you up like this?” “N-no only you do.” I gasp. “Who’s are you?” He thrusts faster, groaning. “I’m yours Rich, only yours.” Richie groans again, he leans over, sucking on my neck, leaving dark purple bruises. My back arches and i moan loudly. He hovers over me again. “You’re mine” his words made the pit in my stomach grow, Richie puts his hand around my neck, making me moan. “You like that? You like when i choke you like the little toy you are.” He growls. I whimper, nodding my head. “You like using my hand as a necklace, hm? You like when i use you as my little sex toy?” Richie groans, i moan, his words sending me over the edge, my hips start bucking as i clench around him. “Are you gonna cum, princess?” I nod my head “yes richie. I’m gonna cum, please let me cum” I whimper again. “Go ahead doll, cum for me, cum all over my cock. I wanna see you” He whispers into my ear, completely sending me over the edge, making me cum harshly, my vision blurred from all the pleasure hitting me. “AH! RICH!” Richie chuckles,  kissing my cheek. His fast pace continues, the grip on my neck loosening a bit. “Rich.” I whimper. “You wanted my dick, you’re getting it. You’re gonna take it until i cum, is that alright?” I nod, moaning from overstimulation. “You like that baby? You like how I’m using you as my little cocksleeve?” He groans into my ear. I nod, whining. Richies thrusts start to falter, getting sloppier. I can feel my high coming back, the pit in my stomach starting again. My hips buck again, clenching around Rich. He groans, making me clench around his dick more. “B-Baby you close again?” He says, shutting his eyes. “Mhm” “cum again for me. I’m here, its okay.” He thrusts rougher into me, his head falling back in pleasure. I whine, his pleasure sending me over the edge, cumming. Richie groans, his dick twitching inside of me. “I’m close. Shit. You fuck so good princess, taking my dick so well.” “You’re so good rich, filling my up with your big dick.” I whine, he groans, cumming in me, stopping his thrusts.

Richie pants, i run my fingers through his hair. “You did so well doll” He flashes me his signature goofy grin. Richie looked down. “That was hot.” He chuckles, i smile admiring his features. “I love you Rich.” I whisper, barely audible. Richies head snaps up, his cheeks red. “Y-you what? Did i hear that r-right. Y-you love me?” His face softens, he smiles slightly. “I love you too Doll.” Richie plants a small sweet kiss on my lips, he pulls out. “You need a bath princess?” He asks. “That’d be nice.” I say softly. “C’mon I’ll go set up the bath”

[descendantofthesparrow]

Shuffle Playlist - Rewrite - Part of Your World - Harry Hook x Reader - Part 14 - Discoveries

=

Evie hung one of the last dresses on the transportation rack, when a knock sounded on her door. She pushed the dresses apart for her to step on the other side and called out; “come in!” Doug entered moments later, a smile on his face.

“Hey! How was the camping trip?” Evie turned to him with furrowed brows.

“C-Camping?” Doug's smile diminished and he looked at her slightly confused.

“yeah?” He tilted his head at Evie “Carlos and Jay said you and the others went on a last-minute camping trip to relax?...is-is that not what you did?” Evie sighed, the questions running through her mind stopping as she realized what had happened.

“oh, um, yeah they lied to you” Doug looked a bit offended “you see, Ben was kidnapped on the isle” now he looked alarmed “let me finish, we saved him and saved Auradon” Doug let out a small sigh of relief and took Evie's hands.

“is everyone okay?” Evie looked off to the side for a moment “you hesitated what happened” She grimaced and shook her head a bit.

“um, well…you know how our parents are kinda pieces of shit?” Doug looked surprised at the swear but nodded “well… Harry's dad is…kinda really bad and…that didn’t turn out well on Harry's side…that’s all I’m saying” she gave a small smile and turned, grabbing some of Dizzy’s accessories that she had brought back with her and sliding some on her arm to carry easier.

“Is he okay now?” Doug asked quietly, stepping to her side and leaning into her field of vision.

“yes” Evie assured him “Mal healed him when we left the isle and he’s with (y/n) now, he should be just fine for cotillion tomorrow~” Doug nodded and gave Evie a small smile.

“that’s good, you had me really worried for a moment there, was anyone else hurt?” Evie thought for a moment then shook her head.

“Mal has a cut on her cheek but that was the worst of our end thankfully.” She gave another smile and looked back down at the accessories “you know…while I was there…I realized something” Doug put his hand on her shoulder “I was lucky enough to be given a chance, and now I need to give someone else a chance too” her mind flashed back to five months ago when Harry had asked Ben to bring Uma over, and maybe after cotillion she could ask about Dizzy?

“My uncle bashful used the say that” Doug switched the topic, sensing Evie was not in the mood to talk about what had happened on the isle with him. Evie smiled, happy with the sudden change and turned to him, her brow raised a bit.

“did he?” Doug nodded, then pursed his lips a bit.

“but, really-really quietly” Evie laughed, spinning around to face the transportation rack and gesturing to it.

“come on, we have dresses to deliver~!” Doug happily obliged to her non-verbal request and moved to the rack, pushing it as Evie pulled it out of the room.

-

Two hours later, after every dress had been delivered, Evie returned to her room and grabbed her last two outfits she had to deliver.

A red rose gown and a red and black suit.

She handed the outfits to Doug and dug into her bag again, finding the red ruby earrings with small crossbones skulls hanging from the top. “perfect” she muttered, carefully holding them in her hand and leading Doug to (y/n)s room.

She knocked on the door, humming as a couple of moments passed by and no response came. She knocked again and sighed when again no response came, she gently opened the door and cooed as she looked inside the room.

On (y/n)s bed was her and Harry, curled up together under her many blankets as soft yellow fairy lights hung above them, the title screen of a movie playing on her tv.

Evie snuck into the room, gesturing Doug to be quiet as she set (y/n)s new earrings on her desk and motioned for Doug to hang hers and Harry's outfits on her closet door.

Evie spotted (y/n)s notepad on her desk and wrote out a small thank you note, pinning it to her corkboard that hung just next to her desk.

She ushered Doug out and turned, smiling at the sleeping couple, and slowly closed the door behind her, shushing it as it shut with a loud click.

“There we go” Evie sighed, turning to Doug and wrapping her arm around his “I’m starving, how about you?”

“Food sounds good” he chuckled, guiding Evie to the cafeteria.

-

Carlos watched from afar as Mal swung her feet just of the gazebo floor, her toes just grazing the cool lake water. He froze as she turned to look at him, her emerald green eyes softening and she invited him closer, turning back to the water as he did so and sat down beside her.

Mal laid her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes, while she and Carlos hadn’t been friends before Auradon, she was glad that she had him by her side now.

“so…you broke up with Ben?” Carlos started, giving Mal a soft smile as she looked up at him. She slowly looked back down at the water as she thought of what to say.

“I…yeah” she sighed, letting her weight fully lean onto Carlos, who lifted his arm and wrapped it around her shoulder. “I’m just…not ready for the relationship he wants…I know I hide my feelings and shit but…I really don’t know how he expected me to just, be good with all of this Auradon lady stuff within six months…I feel like a failure” Carlos let out a low hum, squeezing Mal's shoulder.

“well, you aren’t, you did your best, and your best was good enough, you just found out that that life…isn’t going to work out for you, it goes against your mental wiring, yes maybe you could adjust to it but would you be happy with it?” Mal pursed her lips, Carlos shook her a bit “well?”

“no” Mal muttered, picking at the loose thread on her pants “no I wouldn’t be happy like that…Ben…he said he wanted me…the real me, the isle me-wait…no he wouldn’t want her, she's rude as fuck” Mal smiled at the snort that erupted from Carlos, before it slipped off as she remembered something. Mal stopped Carlos as he was about to speak again “Hey…I did this for Evie but…I wanted to do the same for you” He looked at her confused “I’m sorry for the way I treated you when we were on the isle” he looked off to the side for a moment before he realized what she meant.

“oh! Yeah, it's no biggie” he attempted to brush it off but Mal adamantly shook her head.

“No! it's not “no biggie!” I treated you, Evie, and sometimes Jay, horribly! Even after we became friends! You were and are deserving of kindness, and I’m sorry that I was so fucked up that I was the rottenest little brat to you” Carlos stared at her with wide eyes. “what?”

His shocked look melted into a comforting grin “Thank you Mal” he wrapped his arms around her, pulling into a tight hug that only lasted a moment “sorry, just remembered; you’re not really affectionate” he laughed, grinning wider as Mal giggled along.

“it’s-its fine when it comes from you three” Mal hummed, turning to look back at the lake.

“sooo back to the Ben break up talk?” Carlos tried, smirking as Mal blew a raspberry “come on, you need to talk it out with someone, or else you’re gonna explode keeping it all bottled up.”

“…I’m happy I broke up with him” Mal spilled, not looking at Carlos as his brows shot up “I thought about our future and I realized if I kept doing what I was doing, and we kept going with how we were…neither of us would have been happy…I need to learn to love myself before I can love him properly, because…if (y/n)s forced quote an’ unquote therapy sessions” Carlos laughed at that “taught me anything. It’s that…I rely on someone else's love to measure my self-worth”

Carlos hummed, squeezing Mal's shoulder again “that’s not a good thing”

“no!” Mal huffed, running her hands through her hair and pulling at the roots “it isn’t! I've been trying to earn my mother's love for 16 years, then I just hop to doing so much bullshit to make sure Ben will love me! I dyed my hair blonde, I dressed in those itchy dresses, I dropped my entire personality for all that! And-and it wasn’t good, I felt like I was slipping away Carlos” Mal sobbed, tears trailing down her cheeks as she finally broke “I don’t even remember what I’m supposed to act like without all that because I spent so long doing it I just-I forgot what being ME felt like” Carlos fully wrapped his arms around Mal and pulled her tight to his side.  “I-I know it sounds like I’m being pathetic and having a fucking pity party but I’m just so fucking scared Carlos” Mal whimpered, throwing her arms around Carlos’ torso and pushing her cheek against his shoulder “on the isle my life was commanded by my mother and my identity was pleasing her, and here my life has been being Ben’s girlfriend and pleasing the people of Auradon so they think I’m not some villain whose just after Ben because he’s king…I-I do really like Ben Carlos”

Mal sniffed, pulling back one of her arms and wipe her nose “I do, it's just that…being with him hasn’t helped me move on from my mother bullshit and im-gah!” Mal let out a yell, pulling back from Carlos and burying her face in her hands “I’m having a fucking identity crisis because of my fucking mother! Why can’t she just leave me alone! Why can't all this dumb shit be left behind five months ago! Why do I still have to deal with it?!” Carlos let Mal rant, rubbing her back as she broke down.

“because life is unfair that way” Carlos sighed “Mal I know exactly what you're dealing with right now” Mal peeked out from her fingers, her eyes shining “I still have nightmares from living in my mother’s closet, getting trapped in the bear traps on the ground, or when she would burn me with her cigarette…even ones were she sends dogs at me to kill me…I still hear her voice in my head, telling me I’m worthless, that I’ll never be better than dog chow, my only use was being her servant” Carlos swallowed down the lump in his throat “but I know she's wrong, I’m not anything she says. I’m a tech genius, I've made several computers on the isle just from scraps, I've enhanced my 3D printer to be the best in Auradon, faster than any other and the quality is still top-notch, I've made a tiny little device that was able to make a hole in the barrier, I've gotten offers to work for Tony fucking Stark!” Mal gasped, reaching forward to grab Carlos' shoulders in excitement.

“holy shit what!? When? How? Why?!” Carlos smiled, prying off her grip.

“I knew you all were distracted by something else, especially you, so I didn’t want to make you stressed by my stuff either, it was two months ago. I didn’t take the offer because I want to finish school, but the offer still stands when I graduate in two years” Mal grinned, but it turned to a pout as Carlos gave her a look “Now back to the original topic, I’m not letting you deviate from it, you need to let it all out”

Mal stared at him for a moment before shrugging “I…feel like I already did…Auradon is stressful, my mother is the base of all my mental shit, and I’m not ready to be in a relationship with the dude I love because until I can love myself and learn not to rely on others value of me as my own value I can't be with him in a way that won't hurt him” Carlos slowly grinned “what?” “you said you love Ben~” he teased, laughing as Mal turned red and smacked him.

“I did not!!” she screeched, yelping as Carlos half tackled her and pulled her into an arm lock “Let me go you heathen!”

“you love Ben~ you love Ben~” Carlos sang, laughing as she tried to smack at his face “Come on, pixie! Let's get you back to the dorms, I think you need a nap”

“Don’t call me pixie!”

“How bout gremlin?”

“Carlos!!”

-

Chad carefully pulled the 3D printed copy of the king's crown from the printer and pressed a kiss to the emblem on the front. “Finally,~” He walked over to the mirror that was installed in Jay's standing dresser and carefully perched the crown on his head, smiling as his full cotillion outfit came to light.

He looked like a king~

He tilted the crown down a bit and laughed, posing in the mirror “oh what's that? Why no Audrey, I haven’t chosen my queen yet~” He purred to the fake Audrey in his mind. He turned and started to walk away before spinning back around to pose again “why no Audrey-”

Suddenly his phone rang, and he turned, raising his brow as he walked over to his phone “who could be calling me?”

Caller ID - Audrey <3

Chad let out a high-pitched scream of excitement, dropping his phone to the floor as he gripped his head “ahhAH! Audrey!!!”

“chad!” Carlos groaned, glaring as the other dived to the floor for his phone, and shushed him “Chad! This is my room chad!”

Chad shushed him again, making Carlos roll his eyes. Chad hit the answer button on his phone “Audrey?”

“Hey Chad um, I’m kind of stuck in Sherwood forest, my tire went flat. Could, could you come help me?”

“yeah of course!” Chad covered the mic and turned back to Carlos “she got a flat tire in Sherwood forest and she wants me to come fix it~” Carlos squinted a bit and looked at Chad with an odd look.

“that’s six hours away”

Chad looked at him as if what he said wasn’t a long road trip. “Really? Only six?” he turned back to his phone and put it back to his ear “I’m gonna be there faster than I thought”

“Thanks Chad, I was going to come to cotilli-“ he pulled the phone away and pressed a kiss to the screen, hanging up on Audrey and starting to walk out the door when Carlos stopped him.

“Ah-My printer my crown” Carlos took the crown off Chad's head, who chuckled and gestured back from the printer to the crown before shrugging it off.

“I’m coming Audrey!” he ran down the halls towards his car, leaving a bewildered Carlos in his dorm.

“wow,” Carlos snorted, shaking his head and walking into the room, tossing the crown on Jay's bed. Carlos flopped down on his bed, Dude hopping up next to him moments later “these last two days have been crazy huh?”

“You can say that again” Dude snorted, halfway crawling on Carlos' chest and laying his head down “Nap time?”

“Nap time” Carlos chuckled, pulling his pillow over his face to block out the afternoon sun and sighed.

-end of part 14-

yep, part 14, we’re almost to Cotillion guys! also yep, Doug does not accuse Evie of cheating on him even though he had no reason to do so in the movie and he shows concern over Evie and her friends safety when she tells him about the isle~ what?? no~ this isn't a dig at Doug's awful D2 writing!! how could you accuse me of such a thing~! (Doug had alot of potential but like Mal it got ruined in the second movie and he was pushed as a full on background character in the third) also MORE CARLOS CONTENT~ yes he is smart boi and deserves that recognition and yes, the avengers exist in this universe. hopefully that Mal talk didnt sound like a pity party. 

anyway PERMTAGLLIST

@queer-cosette​ @sephiralorange​

@lunanight2012​ @daughter-of-the-stars11​

@musicarose​ @random-thoughts-003​

@remembered-license​ @rintheemolion​

@thecaptainsgingersnap​ @descendantsobsessed​

@verboetoperee​ @imtryingthisout​

taglist

@thesailbells​ @beccad10x​

[maybe-your-left]

Hellooooo ! I'm probably gonna bitch this because the Tumblr app isn't letting me copy and paste, but requesting #14 from the Gut Punch prompt list for Clyde 🥰 "I can't keep pretending to want to be your friend when I want you in my bed" or maybe Altman? 🥰

It’s fine bby i gotchu… Oh YES ANGST PROMPTS ARE MY LIFE. LETS BRING ON THE RHINESTONE COWBOY HIMSELF, CLYDE RUSTY LOGAN “I can’t keep pretending to want to be your friend when I want you in my bed.”

-----

Whiskey. Clyde should not have had whiskey, it always makes him say things he wouldn’t if he were sober, but he had a rough day. More like a rough week, maybe a month, he couldn’t remember the last time he felt okay. Not since you started dating that guy… Ben. Some slick city guy, with his nice hair, suits and fancy cars. He waltzed into the bar one night, saying he was moving some company down here, and you didn’t leave his side the whole night. Completely forgetting about Clyde! Not that you had any reason to stick by him, you guys were just friends. But things had started getting different between the two of you. Many a few drunk kisses clouded Clyde’s judgement, taking your general niceness as flirtation.

But it all came screeching to a halt when Ben showed up, which is now why Clyde was drinking his second bottle of whiskey. Alone in his trailer, trying to pay attention to the TV, but all he can think about is you. Your beautiful hair, how it frames your pretty face, your musical laugh whenever Clyde says something funny. How you touch his arm when the two of you are having lunch before working at the bar. Your plush lips against his when the two of you had a few too many drinks when closing up, how your sweet moans entered Clyde's mouth, the sounds never leaving his mind.

“Shit,” Clyde groaned, just thinking about you was making him hard. Already straining through his shorts, what he wouldn’t do to have you sitting here on his lap. Naked as the day you were born, bouncing on his cock. How surprised you’d be when you saw how big he was, how much he would stretch your sweet little pussy. Clyde would make you see stars, his cock hitting just the right spots inside you. Making sure you’d never go looking for another man again.

Clyde set down his bottle, rubbing his face with his hand. He really shouldn’t be thinking about you like that… it’s not like you’d do anything if he told you about it. However, his phone was right there, and he knew you’d be up at this time of night. It wouldn’t hurt to give you a call, just to hear your voice.

Before he knew it he had his phone up to his ear, squished between his shoulder and face. Palming his cock through his shorts as he waited for you to answer. Nervously biting his lip as the dial rang, what if you didn’t pick up? Maybe you were busy with Ben? Would he be interrupting anything?

“Hello?” your voice came through. Sounding all scruffy, you had probably been laying down, but the sound of you brought a smile to Clyde’s face.

“Heyyy darlin’,” he cooed, hand pressing on his cock harder. “I didn’ wake y’ did i?”

He heard rustling, a small sigh coming out of your mouth, “Clyde are you drunk?” A small giggle coming in through the phone, Clyde could tell you were amused but that's not what he was going for.

“Why’d y’ think that?”

“Because I can hear you slurring your words,” you giggled again, “What’s going on big bear? You miss me or something?”

Clyde groaned, his hand pulling his cock out and gripping the base, “Y’ have no idea darlin’. Do y’ miss me?” He glided  his hand up his shaft, spreading his precum as much as he could, accidentally letting a grunt slip through the phone.

“You okay?”

“Mm, yeah M’ okay. Could be better.”

“What’s wrong?” he could hear the frown on your face. Those sweet pouty lips would look so nice around his cock, sucking on the head like it was candy.

“Jus’ thinkin,” he paused, closing his eyes as he gripped the base again, “Bout y’.”

“Why are you thinking about me?”

“Y’ know why.”

A deep breath, he could tell you were trying to figure out what he was talking about. He was so anxious to hear what you had to say, maybe he just had to come out and say it. “I can’ keep doin’ this,” he choked.

“Doing what,” you whispered back, voice as quiet as a mouse.

“I can’ keep pretendin’ with y’,” he groaned, “Pretendin’ that I wanna be y’r friend,” another breath, “When I want y’ in my bed. Rollin’ around, bouncin’ on me, beggin’ to cum.”

Silence.

Clyde, shut his eyes, working his hand up and down a little faster as he waited for you to answer him. He could hear your breathing, slow and deep, he wanted so badly to reach out and touch you. Feel your baby soft skin against his calloused hands.

A deep breath, “I’ll be over in 5.”

GASP. DID I, EMILY, LEAVE THIS ON A CLIFFHANGER? im not sorry. 

[innuendostyles]

Umm maybe Ben exploring his ‘feminine’ side more????? How bout him asking u to paint his nails? Or him asking if he can wear your makeup? Idk thought it would be cute hahah

ben wants to try something different

2.8k -> masterlist

waking up next to ben was one of her favourite things on the planet. something about the way his hand would rest underneath her shirt (if she had one on) and rub small circles under her breast settled her like nothing else could. she normally woke up to ben cooing to her, usually murmurs of how beautiful she was when she slept, or if she’d overslept it would be gentle reminders of where she had to be - which was why she was surprised to wake up to dead silence.

she yearned to feel his hands on her skin, as she was so used to, but instead, her hand simply rested in ben’s. her palm face down on ben’s larger hand while he traced one pointer finger over her freshly manicured nails. they were painted a pastel blue colour, completely matte except for a shimmery top coat applied to her ring finger. she’d been on the phone ben while she was getting her nails done, asking him what he thought she should get done when the nail lady asked her what colour she’d like. he asked her what clothes she had on at that moment, to which she replied a light blue jumper that had a sparkly carebear printed on the front of it. he simply gave a ‘well then…’ and told her he’d ring her back when she was done. so to see him admiring her fresh set wasn’t surprising.

his eyes flashed to hers as she roused herself from sleep, carefully removing her hand from his to wipe the drool from her chin. he gave her a light chuckle as her body strung completely taught before laying entirely limp back on the bed and stretching her arms across his chest. she clung to him like a koala, pressing a couple of kisses to his neck when she had enough energy.

“you like my nails?” she whispered, pressing one final kiss to his neck before sitting up.

“yeah.” he chuckled, resting his hand on her hip as she reached to the bedside table to retrieve her phone.

“i’ll make some breakfast.” she said, leaning down to place her hand on ben’s cheek before leaving the bedroom.

she walked down the stairs, calling for frankie as she reached the bottom step, happy to receive many sloppy kisses to her face when she bent down to give the dog her favourite behind the ear scratches.

there was a pink bottle stuck in her mouth, which y/n speedily removed and wiped on her t-shirt to get rid of all the dog spit. it was her nail polish, a cheaper dupe of some dior varnish she’d seen on instagram. the colour, effectively called ‘cha-ching cherry’ was a hot pink, and she’d bought it purely because it was on sale at the drugstore and reminded her of the dior version.

“how’d ya get this, silly girl?” she cooed to the dog, stamping kisses on the top of her head. she wondered how she even reached and opened the polish in the first place, she was sure it had still been in the plastic wrap it came in when she went to bed last night… no, it definitely was. she remembers placing it on the shelf next to the tv when she emptied her bag after she came home. so how had a three year old dog opened protective packaging? it was a mystery to her. instead of going full sherlock mode, she cracked some eggs into a pan and discarded the thought to the back of her mind.

she had to shout ben downstairs, which was unusual, because normally he’s downstairs as soon as she is, offering to help her make breakfast and playing whatever music he was in the mood for over the apartment speakers. he came down the stairs looking rather sweaty and she wondered what he’d been up to. looked like he’d just run a fucking marathon, but he was still dressed in his pyjamas (a pair of calvin kleins couldn’t be classed as pyjamas, surely?) so she knew that answer was out of the equation. maybe he’d been brushing his teeth super violently. she knows that’s not true when he goes to kiss her cheek as a good morning and she shies away from him with a ”morning breath!” and a playful grimace. he chuckles at her, bending down to pat frankie on the head.

he got frankie’s food ready before even realising he had a plate of eggs and fruit waiting in front of him. he sat at the rather small dining table, pouring them some orange juice and handing her the glass once he’d finished. even gave her a little more than he had, because he always complains she doesn’t get her 5 a day.

he just wants her to feel happy and healthy! can he complain, when she treats him so well and even leaves his eggs on for a whole minute longer than hers because she knows he doesn’t like it when the yellow is all runny? when she takes care of a dog that originally was the shared pup of him and his ex?

he has no time to think before she’s giggling a little, pointing to frankie in the corner of the kitchen who had somehow managed to eat all her food and drink all her water in the space of 2 minutes. he giggled as well, taking a bite of his eggs and calling out a ”good girl” to the beagle.

“yeah, well our ‘good girl’ somehow managed to open my new nail polish and came to me this morning with it in her mouth like it was some sort of present she bought! might have to start calling her father christmas!” she jokes, taking a bite of banana before breaking some off and making a kissy sound to garner frankie’s attention before placing some on the floor next to her for the dog. she did love her banana.

ben places his hand quickly onto his thigh beneath the table after he caught sight of it on top of the tablecloth, hoping she hadn’t noticed how quickly he made the movement. she simply furrows her brows at him, tilting her head as she asked if he was okay.

“yeah, ‘m fine just got a cramp.” he lies straight through his teeth, not being able to look her in the eyes and instead offering frankie a piece of watermelon to frankie, which was unusual for him as he never gave his food to her, claiming it ‘only gives her a bad tummy and then i’m the one who has to clean up all the sick she leaves on the bathroom floor!’, which y/n notices and gives a sigh.

“ben.” she deadpans, setting the banana peel down.

he removes his hand from his leg and sets it upon the table, in a fist originally, before he unclenches his hand and then she sees it. his ring and middle finger nails are painted pink. he looks carefully at her reaction, even though there isn’t much to go off, just a look back to his eyes after she’s seen his hand.

“are you… angry?” he questions, eyes still avoiding hers.

“i’m not angry at you for using my nail polish without telling me ben…” she says with a slight chuckle, her face looking awfully confused, “...what’s mine is yours, and all that.”

his eyes flit to her’s at this, a brow raising as he asks, “so you’re not… weirded out?”

she can’t actually tell if he’s joking or not until she looks at his hands, where he’s nervously pulling at his knuckles in hopes to make them crack. it was one of his worst habits, something he only did when he was really going through it. she realises he must have been embarrassed or feel ashamed when she tells him she wasn’t, if the way his shoulders fell from near enough above his head showed her anything.

she decides he wants to leave the conversation at that when he picks up his fork and begins eating his eggs, looking a hell of a lot less stressed than he did before.

“why were you so sweaty when you came down before?” she questions, though she’s careful to make her tone sound as least judgemental as she possibly can, offering an inquisitive smile at the end.

“i um- wanted to get it off. before you saw it.” he purses his lips before he speaks again. “i couldn’t find any of that horrid-smelling remover stuff so i was trying to scrub it off with that lemon exfoliating shit you’ve got in the shower. worked up quite a sweat.” he chuckled, and she smiled at his first genuine laugh this morning.

“ben, why did you think i’d care so much?” she asks, and she can actually feel a pain in her chest as she realises it must have been eating away at him all night after his reaction to her seeing it. the pain in her chest only deepens when she hears a muttered, “i thought you’d think it was … really weird and like… not normal.” he continues, his voice getting louder and louder as he carried on, “cause it’s like… a girls thing. and i’m not a girl. and i know you’d never think that i was stupid or weird so i don’t even know why it ran through my head cause i did it last night when you went to bed and i was still downstairs… i saw it and i just wanted to put it on me like… for fun. and then i thought you might be angry at me for opening it so i just went to bed but i couldn’t sleep cause i was worried you’d be annoyed at me so i just… spent all night looking at yours. your nails, i mean.” once he’d finished rambling, she reached a hand out to his, pulling him along until they’d settled onto the sofa in the living room.

her on her back against the arm rest, with him on his stomach laying between her legs. maybe not the most flattering position on her part, but she felt closest to him this way. she reached a hand up to his hair, running her fingers through the golden locks before sighing.

“ben, i need you to listen to what im gonna say really closely, yeah?” she whispered.

he nods, and she takes that as her cue to continue.

“it isn’t ‘a girls thing’. and i’m not angry at you, and you’re right, i’d never think you’re weird for doing anything ever. i love you, and i’m in this for the long haul, so speak to me. tell me when you wanna try new things. ‘cause you know i won’t be angry, or annoyed, or weirded out… because it’s you.” she could see his eyes softening as he stared directly into hers.

it felt like he was reaching deep inside her mind and pulling out every honest word he could find. he laid his head down on her stomach, before giving a simple, “i love you.”

“do you want me to paint the rest of them?” she asked after a couple of minutes of stroking through his hair.

“please.” he replied, and she felt his smile on her stomach as he heard frankie pattering through the doorway and coming to lie on ben’s back to join them both. he lifted his head up and formed his lips into a kissy shape, to which she leant down and pecked him.

he followed her into the kitchen to retrieve the nail polish, clapping like an excited kid as she led him upstairs. she walked into the bathroom and sat on the countertop, ben bringing a chair from the bedroom to sit in front of her. she spread her legs and placed his hand flat on the surface of the counter, protected by an old sheet of newspaper in case of a polish accident.

once she’d painted one hand, he rested it on her thigh, only beginning to stroke it once she told him his nails were dry enough. she’d finished his other hand, commending her own painting skills as she skipped the two nails he’d already done the night before, he kissed her thigh, just below where his dry hand sat, before lifting himself off the chair to press a kiss to her forehead, then her left cheek, and finally her lips. she pulled her head back as soon as she felt how dry his lips were, telling him he needed some vaseline.

he looked behind her, seeing her collection of lip products before picking up a familiar tube. it was one she used constantly, which meant it must have been good, which was the reason why he asked her to put some on him a couple of seconds later.

“vaseline isn’t the same as lipgloss, but i’ll let this one slide, my dear.” she chuckles, opening the tube of clear, strawberry scented lipgloss. it had a slight shimmer to it, especially when in the sun, and she was unbelievably excited to see it on him.

“i only picked it cause it tastes nice.” he mentions before she has the chance to apply it.

“ben! you’re not meant to eat it!” she scolds, pulling back and taking the applicator with her.

“i know! i don’t do it purposefully, i just get a mouthful sometimes after you snog me.” he says,

smiling when she laughs.

“yeah, well i think i might have to see just how it tastes the next time we snog, which i have a feeling might be in just a second.” she smirks before applying the gloss.

[megalony]

Teacher’s Pet- Part 14

Here is the next part in my dad! Ben Hardy series which I hope you will all like, the feedback for this series has been lovely so far and I know a lot of people are rooting for the baby to be a girl so we will find out soon.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie​ @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr​ @rogermeddow​ @radiob-l-a-hblah​ @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6​ @rogertaylors-lipgloss​ @sj-thefan​ @omgitsearly​ @luckytrashgooprebel​ @scarsout​ @deaky-with-a-c​ @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @rogahs-drowse @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @hellsdragon @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh

Series taglist: @im-an-adult-ish​​​ @gwilymleeisbae​​​​ @k-k0129​​​​​ @haileymorelikestupid​​​​ @glittrixvibe​​​​ @youngpastafanmug​ @ultraviolencezs​

Series masterlist

Summary: Gwilym sets Ben up on a date with (Y/n) who teaches at the school Ben’s kids go to. But Ben is hesitant in the relationship, desperate not to make the same mistakes and needing to put his kids first.

Enjoy.

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"I know you're not asleep." The tone of Ben's voice told Carter the expression he just knew would be on his dad's face. He didn't have to open his eyes and look over at Ben to know his brows would be raised and and his head would be tilted at an angle. He didn't sound angry but he didn't sound pleased either and Carter couldn't expect anything else.

The moment Ben had brought him back from a two hour drive last night, he had been told to go straight to his room. He ate dinner in his room to be out the way of everyone else and he didn't get to see (Y/n) before lights out and he had to try and go to sleep.

It was very clear to Carter that he had done something very bad yesterday because of the way Ben acted around him. He was only ever cold and uninterested around Carter when he was trying to teach him a lesson for doing something wrong. Ben wasn't letting him act out in such a bad way and then expect everything to be fine afterwards.

Ben checked on Carter when it was time for him to go to bed and then a few times during the night but the eldest boy hadn't had one hour of sleep last night. For the first half of the night Carter was restless, throwing himself around the bed and then Ben heard him a few times getting angry and unsettled. But after two o'clock he just seemed to quieten down but he hadn't slept, it was very clear he had been too unsettled to sleep. Ben hadn't expected anything else, he was sure that Carter wouldn't get any sleep tonight either considering the outburst he had yesterday and the emotions he was now going through.

Holding his breath deep in his lungs, Carter very slowly and timidly peeled the cover from over his head until his eyes and nose were visible and he tiredly opened his eyes to look over at Ben. Even though a lot of the time he never slept, Carter still closed his eyes for most of the night because his eyes got tired. He didn't get to sleep but he got to rest his eyes and drown in his thoughts for hours on end.

He looked up at Ben who was sat on the middle of the bed with his back pressed up against the wall and his feet hanging off the side of the bed. Carter reached his hand out of the cover to try and indicate that he wanted the cup of coffee in Ben's hand but Ben shook his head and brought the rim of the mug to his lips. There was no way he was letting Carter be dosed up on caffeine this early in the morning.

"Are we getting up?"

"Soon, I want to talk to you first." Ben moved his free hand to gently rest Carter's legs over his lap to stop him from laying curled up like he was. He rubbed his hand over Carter's ankles for a moment, trying to make sure he didn't look scared or angry and check he seemed okay.

"Is it about mum?" Carter's voice was quiet but he wasn't angry or scared or unsettled. The look in his eyes showed he clearly felt guilty for what happened yesterday but he seemed like he would be fine talking about it.

"Yeah it is because we can't have a repeat of yesterday."

"I didn't mean to I swear. I didn't mean to hurt mum and you said she wasn't mad at me- she's not mad, is she?"

The way Ben kept rubbing his hand over Carter's ankle calmed him down enough to know that Ben was no longer mad at him and that (Y/n) couldn't be mad either or Ben wouldn't be so calm around him right now. Carter pulled the pillow tighter under his head until it felt like the pillow was going to swallow him up and he kept his eyes focused solely on Ben. He felt calm enough and more at ease now to be able to look Ben in the eye unlike last night.

"No she's not mad at you buddy, your mum knows you didn't mean it but that doesn't mean I wasn't mad at you. You were really rude and hurtful to her with what you said, you know you can't say things like that to people, and then you hit her too."

"I didn't mean it-"

"Carter... buddy, please try and listen to me now."

Ben put his drink down before he leaned over and gently pulled Carter until he was sitting up next to Ben, his legs still strewn over Ben's lap. He needed Carter to try his best to listen and understand to what he was saying because Carter had to understand. He had to know being rude and intentionally spiteful with his words wasn't okay and lashing out was never acceptable, especially not with (Y/n) or the boys.

"Me and your mum know you can't help it when you get upset but you have to try and think before you lash out. Your mum's having a baby now, if you hit her near her tummy or you push her and she falls, the baby can get hurt too and I know you wouldn't want that to happen. I don't care if you hit or push or bite me but I mean it when I say you can not do that to your mum, especially not now she's pregnant."

He didn't know how else to word it so that Carter would understand how wrong it would be if he physically hurt (Y/n). Carter wouldn't put the pieces together that hurting (Y/n) hurt the baby unless he hurt (Y/n) and the baby was hurt or everyone suddenly became scared that the baby would be hurt. If Ben could drill it into Carter's head now that he couldn't act like that then hopefully if he did get angry again then it wouldn't be directed towards (Y/n).

"Do you understand what I mean?"

"I can't lash out at mum cause it might hurt the baby in her tummy... I- I don't like you and mum having a baby, but I don't want to hurt the baby either."

As much as it irritated and unsettled Carter to know Ben and (Y/n) were having a baby that he didn't want them to have, he also didn't want to hurt the baby. He wouldn't want to be the reason they lost or didn't have the baby because it would make him feel guilty beyond belief. He remembered when Lucy was pregnant with Finn, Ben had told him about the baby growing in her stomach and being careful around her. He wouldn't want to hurt (Y/n), ever, and he wouldn't want to hurt the baby either.

"I know you don't buddy, but no one is mad at you anymore it's okay now."

"Can I see mum now?" Carter had come close to having another tantrum last night when Ben told him in no uncertain terms that he wasn't seeing (Y/n) until morning because he was still unsettled. It was both for safety and to teach Carter that he couldn't do that and expect things to be okay. But he did want to see her, he felt bad and he wanted to say sorry and make sure she was okay with him.

"She's gonna come and talk to you in a minute, I'll see you downstairs. Remember to say sorry." Ben kissed the top of Carter's head and wrapped him up in a hug for a minute or so before he slowly unravelled from his son and left the room.

Carter kept the covers wrapped around him like he was a butterfly trying to break free from his cocoon. He pulled his knees up to his chest but the moment (Y/n) entered the room and sat down on the bed he struggled to untangle himself from the cover. The moment he broke free he scuttled over until he was almost sitting on (Y/n)'s lap with his arms around her neck, his face buried in her shoulder and his front pressed against her own.

"I'm sorry... dad said I was rude and cruel but I didn't mean it and I didn't mean to hit you, dad said I could hurt the baby if I do it again."

(Y/n) could tell that there was a big part of Carter that was expecting her to push him away from her or shout at him or glare and be annoyed with him, but she wasn't. She knew he couldn't help the way he reacted and he was so desperate to be loved that he was afraid a baby would take that love and attention away from him.

She understood why he reacted how he did and (Y/n) knew he was spiteful because it was how he thought he should react to show them just how hurt he felt. As for hitting her, that was just part of his anger that he needed to learn how to control.

"I know you didn't mean what you said, honey, it's okay. But your dad acted the way he did because he was worried. The baby's fine so you don't have to be upset anymore, we just don't want you getting that upset again."

(Y/n) knew that Ben reacted with more anger and fire than she did but it was just how they were. She had the patience when it came to Carter but Ben didn't because Ben had spent all of Carter's life trying to curb his anger issues and his attitude but he ran out of patience when Carter acted out badly like last night. If Carter hurt (Y/n) or one of the boys Ben couldn't help but get annoyed with him, but when Carter was up all night Ben had all the patience in the world to sit and hold him or calm him down from a tantrum.

"You're not mad at me, are you?"

"No baby, I'm not mad. But I need you to understand that I am your mum even if I have a baby with your dad. You're my eldest boy, just like with your dad, he hasn't replaced you with James or Finn or with this baby and neither will I."

"But it will be your baby."

"Yeah, and I want a baby with your dad but that doesn't mean I don't want you too. Your dad loves all of you equally and that makes him your dad, if he can do that then I can love you all just the same as I can love a baby. Honey, I have no reason whatsoever to replace you because I love everything about you. I love how you look like your dad, how you're almost as tall as me, I love that you try and look after your brothers and you help and respect your dad. I love how you let me be your mum, I think you're perfect and I wouldn't have you any other way."

(Y/n) slowly tangled her fingers into Carter's hair and started to sway them side to side when she felt him sniffing into her shoulder to try and stop himself from crying.

Someone other than Ben truly loved him and wasn't getting angry with him or annoyed at how he reacted or what he said and did. She didn't want to change how he could make her uncomfortable with eye contact or how he spoke or acted in certain situations. She wasn't even annoyed by his uncontrollable temper.

(Y/n) loved him and would never replace him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"When will the baby be here?"

(Y/n) turned her head to look over at James who was sat next to her on the sofa on her right. He had his head leaning against her arm and his eyes focusing up on (Y/n) rather than on the book in her hands. James preferred having a story read to him either by Ben or (Y/n) or by listening to an audio book because it was easier than reading which gave him a headache after a while.

"Not for five months or so, honey. Why, are you excited?" (Y/n) looked down at James with a smile when he nodded his head but seemed rather deflated that he would have to wait a while. He was only three when Finn was born so he wouldn't remember or understand that it took around about nine months to have the baby if things went smoothly. The waiting game was good for Ben and (Y/n) because it gave them time to prepare but it wasn't so good for the boys because they didn't have a lot of patience and waiting wasn't what they typically liked to do.

"Yeah! Will it be another boy?"

Pressing her lips together, (Y/n) set down the book on the coffee table which she knew was going to be long-forgotten now they were having this conversation.

"I don't know, me and your dad don't get to choose sweetheart. It might be a boy, but it could be a girl."

"So, it's a surprise?"

"Exactly. Do you want it to be a boy?" (Y/n)'s words seemed to catch Finn's attention for the youngest boy put down the game controller in his hand and spun round on the floor so he could face (Y/n) and his brother. He didn't have the courage to speak up about this topic but it was one he wanted to listen to all the same.

Finn shyly moved over to the sofa when (Y/n) beckoned him to sit with them when she noticed he was watching intently. He sat down on (Y/n)'s other side and very timidly shuffled closer until their arms were very lightly brushing against one another. Close contact was something Finn didn't like with anyone but Ben and his brothers but he was slowly becoming more and more comfortable around (Y/n) enough that he could have her hug him or hold his hand.

Neither Ben nor (Y/n) knew how he would be with a new sibling. Finn was so at ease around Carter and James because they were older than him and he saw them as his protectors just like Ben. They looked out for him and they helped him, even though Carter did get angry around him Finn knew it wasn't always on purpose and Carter did generally look out for him. A younger sibling meant someone that Finn might have to look out for and protect and he didn't feel like he could protect himself. But he may be fine and happy with a younger sibling to play with and teach.

"I don't mind, a sister might be nice though... dad always says he's overpowered by boys." It always stuck in James' mind when Ben commented that he had a house full of boys or he was overruled by his sons. But James always had the picture in his head of Ben as a dad to the boys, the monsters as Ben referred to them. Ben with a little girl would change that image.

"No, daddy said he's the boss." Finn leaned to look across at James before he cautiously looked up at (Y/n).

In Finn's mind Ben was the boss, he was in charge, he took care of them and loved them and when he argued with Carter he was always the overpowering one. When Ben said he was the boss it fit the image Finn had of him as his protector as well as his dad.

"He is the boss, don't worry. What about you, do you think a sister might be nice?"

"Boy. Daddy always has boys, it's his superpower." Finn shook his head when the point of a sister was brought up. He didn't want a sister, it wouldn't be right because he had brothers and Ben just had boys. Ben used to say that his superpower was having boys and that they were his world. If he had a girl it didn't feel like it would settle very well, Finn couldn't imagine Ben having a daughter after having three boys. He couldn't see himself with a sister and he certainly couldn't see Carter having a sister.

Carter got angry, what if he got angry around a baby girl and frightened her?

"We might be having a boy, but if we do have a girl then it just means your dad's superpower is upgraded."

"Why is the baby in there?" Finn's voice was quiet but his eyes were full of curiosity as he very cautiously moved his hand to tap gently against (Y/n)'s stomach to emphasise his point. He was only four so there was no way they could expect Finn to understand why the baby had to grow in (Y/n)'s stomach but it didn't make it any easier to come up with a reason that he would understand.

"This is just where baby's grow and develop, honey. Then in a few months they'll be ready to meet you."

"Did daddy put baby there?" Finn kept lightly smoothing and tapping his hand on (Y/n)'s stomach but he stopped and squealed when he suddenly felt a pair of hands sneak under his arms and pick him up. Ben leaned over the back of the sofa and hoisted Finn effortlessly into the air, holding him against his chest as he tickled him.

"You bet I did, that's my superpower. I've put a movie on up in our room, you two gonna go watch it for a bit while I talk to your mum?"

Ben set Finn gently down to his feet, his eyes following both boys as they scuttled upstairs. They knew it was getting close to their bedtime but watching a movie in Ben and (Y/n)'s room got them calm and settled ready to sleep. When he knew they were upstairs and out of earshot Ben moved round the sofa and sat down next to (Y/n) with a smile that made her stomach flutter.

"I want to talk to you about something but I don't want the boys listening." Ben darted his eyes up to indicate that he had asked the boys to go upstairs so they could talk. His soft smile and vibrant green eyes told (Y/n) that it wasn't anything worrying or bad or upsetting but it was clearly something that the boys shouldn't be listening to and that made her intrigued.

"What's up?"

"I've been thinking about when we have the baby, and I know you're not even fully moved in with us yet... but I was thinking we could look for a new house, a place of our own?"

Ben clasped his hands together in front of him and leaned his arms on his knees like he was about to hunch over in his usual stance. Since the moment (Y/n) told him she thought she might be pregnant nothing else had been on his mind but this baby and now it was set in stone he knew he wasn't going to be thinking of anything else.

"R-really?" A swarm of butterflies raged through (Y/n)'s chest that made her feel like she was breathless. She hadn't ever been so invested in a relationship where they bought a house together, but then again (Y/n) had never been in a relationship where she gained three lovely children and was now pregnant. But a place of their own sounded like something from a dream, it could be somewhere they picked out and decorated and somewhere the boys loved and felt comfortable and safe.

"Yeah, I mean, I bought this place after the court case with Lucy went through two years ago but it was never meant to be permanent. And the sleeping arrangements will have to change anyway. James and Finn can't share a room with a newborn and Carter can't share with anyone so we need another room."

Ben picked this house because he had to move Finn out of the house that held the bad memories for him. He had only been two at the time but keeping him in that house was something Ben couldn't put him through in case it made his nightmares and anxiety worse. But he didn't expect this to be a forever home, it was temporary until they all got settled and things worked out but Ben never ended up having the time to think about moving again until now.

But when the baby was born this house couldn't be permanent for them. There were three rooms in total and with three kids that was fine, James and Finn shared a room which made Finn feel more secure and safe, Ben and (Y/n) had a room and Carter had the box room to himself. He couldn't share with his brothers in case he had an outburst and he certainly couldn't share with a newborn. It wouldn't be the best idea for (Y/n) and Ben to have to share with the baby either, they would all be cramped together like sardines.

"I think it sounds great... but will the boys take it well?"

"Finn will need time to adjust and Carter will have a meltdown because of the change but it wasn't too bad with him last time. Since you're moving with us too and they all know they won't have to share with a baby I think it will be a lot smoother."

Finn had to get used to a new environment and make sure it felt safe and secure to him but it had been very easy when they moved into this house. And with everyone moving too and him staying at the same pre-school Ben knew he would be okay. It was Carter that he was worried about because the change wouldn't work well with him. But they were moving with (Y/n), she would be there with them and making the house their own so Carter wouldn't be half as bad with her there. (Y/n) was able to calm him down and help him with his anger better than anyone else, the move wouldn't be bad if she was there.

If they moved they could find somewhere with enough space for the six of them and somewhere that truly felt like a home to them.

Somewhere for their family.

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Rose Coloured Glasses - Part 14

A/N - OMG its been a while.... again!! Im so sorry i promise i’ll try to update quicker. 💕💕

Having no work meant i had no reason to wake up early....i slept in until 10am then went downstairs to grab some cereal and a cup of tea which i took out into the backyard being as it was a nice day out.

Andy had text me just before 9am saying good morning, so i quickly shot a message back to him. I checked my emails and quickly scrolled through the news before deciding to go shower and start my day of doing absolutely nothing!

The day had been dragging so bad, i had already cleaned the house top to bottom and done the washing etc and it was barely lunchtime! I never thought id say this but i missed work.

It was nearing 10pm when i heard my front door being unlocked, i had a sudden rush of fear until i remembered i gave Andy my spare key.

"Hey" he said quietly as he dumped his coat on the arm chair. I looked up from where i was laying on the sofa watching some cooking show.

"Hey, how are you?"

"Tired" he scoffed before climbing onto the sofa squeezing in behind me so he could hold me close.

"How'd your meeting go with Joanna?" I asked stroking my fingers up and down his arm.

"Erghh" he moaned as he buried his face in my neck.

"That good huh?"

"Jake told us Ben had been bullying him, thats why he didn't tell anyone when he found his body. He thought he'd get the blame.... then Laurie brought up the stuff about my dad....Jacobs now pissed at me for lying to him"

"He'll get over it, he's probably just lashing out...."

"Maybe" Andy nodded "then i went to talk to Duffy, i needed to know if they were still looking into Patz.... i asked her if she could get me a copy of his file"

"She gonna help?"

"I dont think so. I thought we were friends you know? But turns out she didnt agree with me" he said sadly.

"Really? I thought you guys we're friends"

"Apparently we're just work colleagues"

"Im sorry you've had a crappy day" i turned to press a kiss to his lips and he smiled down at me.

"Its getting better now"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah"

"You eaten? I could make you something..."

"Not since lunch, but i'm good i just want to hold you" he mumbled with his head buried in my neck, a loud rumble from his stomach made us both laugh.

"Okay so maybe i'm a little hungry"

"I'll go make us something" i chuckled as i slipped from his arms and headed to the kitchen.

"You're the best, i love you" he called out making me turn to him with a smile.

"I love you too".

Over the next few weeks Andy and Laurie tried to make Jacobs home life as normal as possible. They hired him a tutor, his 2nd grade teacher who had now retired....It had kept Jacob occupied.

When he wasn't working on school work he would be in his room playing computer games.

I had been spending a lot of time at the Barber house after Andy told me he felt better with me around, i also became good friends with Laurie. We'd often make lunch and evening meals together before Andy would drive me home. He would sometime stays the night if he didnt have to be anywhere early, It was nice just to have some alone time with him.

Laurie had decided to go back to work today so i had offered to help Andy get dinner ready. We were nearly finished with everything when Andy noticed the time.

"Laurie's usually home by now, i hope her day went okay" Andy said quietly as he wiped off his hands.

"Maybe she just had a lot to catch up on, she's been away for a while"

"Yeah maybe, i'm just gonna go check on Jake. You okay here for a few minutes?"

"Im fine, go" i chuckled shaking my head. Andy pressed a quick kiss to my lips and headed upstairs to check on Jacob. After a few minutes i heard Andy come back downstairs and head out to the front porch, Jacob came into the kitchen giving me a quick smile.

"My dad said to help set the table"

"Thats great, this is nearly ready" i smiled at him, Jacob had been a bit quiet around me when we first met but he was  more comfortable around me now.

"You okay?" I asked noticing that he seemed a little moody.

"Yeah, its just my dad...."

"Oh no, what did he do?"

"Got pissed at me for playing video games online"

"He's just looking out for you Jake, he knows how all this works. What they look into, the things that can go against you. I know you probably think he's being over the top but he just wants to protect you"

"I know, it just sucks" he said sadly.

While Jacob set the table Laurie came rushing in.

"Hey mom" Jacob greeted her with a smile.

"I'll be right there" she replied before rushing upstairs. Jacob shrugged and continued to set out plates.

When Andy didn't come back inside i went looking for him, Laurie had come back downstairs looking like she had been crying... what was going on?

As i walked outback to the yard i saw Andy standing in front of the garage door.

"MURDERER ROT IN HELL" had been spray painted in huge black letters.

"Oh my god...." i gasped holding a hand over my mouth, no wonder Laurie had been upset "Jesus christ Andy....."

"Im so sick of this shit" Andy mumbled under his breath as he tried to scrub off the hateful words.

"Have you got another brush, i'll help"

"You don't have to....."

"I want to" i smiled up at him, Andy pressed a quick kiss to my lips and then went to find an extra brush. We scrubbed for what seemed like hours and we still couldn't get it off, the letters faded to a dull grey but you could still see what it said.... at least it wasn't as visible to anyone passing by on the street now though.

I reheated some dinner for me and Andy and we sat down to eat together, Jake had gone up to his room like usual and Laurie had gone up to bed to read (i think she just wanted to be alone).

"Laurie seemed like she was struggling with everything today" i said quietly to Andy taking a mouthful of my beer, he nodded slowly picking up his own beer.

"Yeah, she was told not to go back to work..... they can't risk being associated with her"

"Thats rough, that would have been a great distraction for her for a few hours"

"It would have been good for her but i get why they done it. This whole thing with Jacob hasn't just ruined his life....."

"I know" i reached over taking Andy's hand "but you're handling it great"

Andy scoffed looking at me with a smirk.

"Im a mess....."

"You're not a mess, you're strong for Laurie and Jake, you support them through all this bad shit"

"Then i fall apart when i'm with you" he scoffed.

"But thats okay, they don't need to know that and i don't mind..... i'm here for you"

"I love you"

"I love you too" i smiled before taking a another mouthful of my beer "so, what was in the file...." i pointed my bottle towards a file Andy had placed on the table.

"Duffy came through on that Patz file" he cracked a smile.

"She did?..... huh maybe you guys are friends after all".

"Maybe".

The following day Andy and Laurie were meeting with a specialist in genetic inheritance and behaviour to discuss Jacob, Joanna had suggested it was a good idea just incase they tried to use everything with Andy's father against Jake. While they were gone i stayed with Jacob at the house while his tutor came by. I was sat on the sofa watching a rerun of Friends to pass the time when my phone vibrated in my pocket. When i looked at who was calling i was surprised to see who it was.... Frank.

"Hello?" I answered quietly so i didn't disturb Jacobs lesson.

"Hey beautiful, how are you?"

"Im good... how are you?" I hated how his voice still gave me butterflies!!

"Not too great, i miss you"

"Frank....."

"I know, i know. You're with Andy now.... i... i missed my chance...."

"Frank are you wasted?" I asked catching the sound of his slurring.

"No baby of course not"

I sighed shaking my head, if he hadn't been drinking that must mean he was high.

"Look i cant talk right now...."

"Can i call you later?"

"Im not sure thats such a good idea"

"Please? i just wanna talk"

"Fine, i wont be home til after 9pm...."

"Thats fine i'll call you then"

"Okay, bye Frank" i quickly ended the call tucking my phone in my pocket, that phone call should be interesting.

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier @fairlightswiftly @hiddelstannerbarnes

Rose Coloured Glasses taglist: @readermia @princess-evans-addict @jennmurawski13 @matsumama @ex-bloodjunkie @kaithezaftig @ms-betsy-fangirl

[illfoandillfie]

5 Simple Rules for a Successful Fake Relationship: Failure To Launch

5 SIMPLE RULES MASTERLIST

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Summery: Tensions rise as you try to deal with Ben's secret and keep your fake relationship afloat. But when the script calls for an argument, will too much be said?

Warnings: Still pretty innocent. Some swearing, passing reference to Ben smoking, references to sex but not explicitly so, a discussion of a douchbag ex, a public argument.

Words: 6587

A/N: We’re really in it now folks. 

Originally there was going to be more in this chapter but it was getting too long and kind of undercut what is now the end of the chapter, so I rearranged some stuff. But that just means there’s a whole extra chapter that I didn’t think would be there when I wrote the masterlist lmao. 

Taglist:  @laedymoon  @dtfrogertaylor  @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor  @hannafuckingsucks  @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @queenmylovely @supersonicfreddie @tenement-funstah 

@coni-martina @johndeaconshands​

When you finally found the courage to leave the bathroom Ben was waiting for you in the seat he’d vacated earlier, now under a crocheted throw and staring at his phone. He looked up at the sound of your footsteps, smiling softly when he saw you. “Sorry,” you blurted out, dropping onto the end of the couch furthest from where he sat. “No worries,” he laughed, “you ready to keep watching?” “Mmhmm,” “Are you alright? You look a little pale,” “Fine, thanks. Just tired. Might call it quits after this ep.” “You wanna share the blanket?” “Nah, I’m not that cold,” your heart was racing with every word of forced naturality, white noise filling your brain and nervous butterflies filling your stomach. Did he always smile like that when he saw you? What other signs had you missed? You tucked your legs under yourself and pulled your phone out, a barrier between you and he, and a way to keep your hands busy as you tried to focus on the show. It was pointless though. It felt like an age had passed since you began the episode. A dramatic shift in your reality had occurred. You couldn’t remember what had been happening when the pause button was hit let alone understand what was going on now. There just wasn’t space in your head, not when you had to keep reminding yourself to breathe and not look over at Ben. God how you wished you hadn’t gone into the kitchen. Ignorance truly was bliss. You rubbed your thumb over the locked screen of your phone, occasionally unlocking it and opening an app before locking it again, the episode dragging on in the background. Finally, it finished, after much too much time. “Ready for bed or d’you wanna squeeze in one more?” Ben asked, apparently completely at ease. “Definitely time for bed,” you yawned as you stood up, praying Ben wouldn’t stop you. “Alright. I’m gonna stay up a bit longer so if the TVs too loud let me know.” “Night,” “Sleep tight, cuddle bunny.” You could feel Ben’s eyes on you as you headed through the doorway, only barely stopping yourself from sprinting to the safety of your room. You weren’t at all tired, but you turned the light out all the same, stumbling towards your bed by the glow of your phone. As you settled again the pillows you let out a long breath, finally allowing yourself to relax. There was nothing else to do but try to distract yourself, until you felt tired enough. You checked your emails again, but there was nothing new besides some spam for bitcoins. Then you opened youtube, hoping to find some sort of relaxing video that would help you get to sleep. It worked for a while, made you focus on counting your breaths and the meditation that was calmly being spoken. But then it stopped working, thoughts of Ben wriggling back to the forefront of your mind, making a lump form in your throat. A little while later you heard Ben’s footsteps pass by your door as he made his way to his room, the low hum of voices on the TV now quiet. You held your breath as he paused outside your room but his footsteps backtracked, a light flicked off, and then the door to your spare room shut behind him. You didn’t dare move until you were sure he was in bed. But he didn’t stir again, and you fell into a fitful sleep, interrupted by dreams in which you and Ben walked around hand in hand, sometimes blissfully happy, sometimes unable to separate, glued together like a bug caught on flypaper.

The sun had risen by the time you called a time of death on a decent night’s sleep, though it was still what you’d normally consider much too early. It was even too early for Ben who, as you’d come to learn in your months crashing at each other’s places, usually woke before you and enjoyed teasing you about being a teenager for sleeping in so late. You tiptoed to the kitchen and tried not to make too much noise as you brewed yourself a coffee. Maybe it was the new morning bringing clarity or maybe it was delirium from lack of sleep, but you felt you had a better grasp of the situation now. The fact was you didn’t like Ben in that way. And he knew that. So the obvious thing to do was nothing. If you said anything, confessed that you’d overheard him, it’d just end up with both of you feeling embarrassed and you having to put what you both already knew into words that would just hurt Ben more. And that would only add extra stress onto whatever dates and staged relationship moments you’d have to take part in. Because you couldn’t just stop pretending to date. Not when your story was creating buzz for your movie. Not when you were looking for a new job and every scrap of notoriety you could find would help increase your chances of actually landing some of the roles you auditioned for. You’d just have to grin and bear it for a few months. But you supposed that’s what Ben had been doing since who knew how long. With coffee in hand you made your way back to your room, fortifying yourself for what was to come.

It was a few hours before you saw Ben, sleep tousled and searching for caffeine. He took one glance at you and then stepped in close, bringing his hand up to your forehead. You were too stunned by the sudden warmth and how all the air suddenly smelt of him to do more than quietly ask what he was doing. “Checking your temperature. Not like you to beat me out of bed. And you still look kind of pale. Are you sure you feel okay?” “I feel fine Ben.” He withdrew his hand slowly but didn’t move away, his eyes darting to your lips and away again. You stepped back. Ben cleared his throat and turned back to the coffee he was halfway through making, “Are you still okay to give me a lift back to the pub?” “Yeah, of course. Just let me have a shower first.” “Yeah, no rush.” You managed to mostly avoid Ben until you were both in the car. The evidence of his breakfast was loaded into the dishwasher when you got out of the bathroom but he himself was standing on your back patio, looking up at the overcast sky as smoke from his morning cigarette dissipated around him. He waved through the window when he saw you. After that all you had to do was wait for him to brush his teeth and gather up his bag while you flittered from room to room making yourself look busier than you were. Once in the car you started a safe conversation about what you’d be doing for the rest of the day. “I’m going over to a mates house in the afternoon to watch the football but that’s about it. What about you?” “Um, nothing much really. I have a couple of scripts to look over but other than that nothing. I’ll probably just go back to bed though.” “Probably a good idea.” “Do I look that bad? I thought the concealer covered the worst of it.” He shook his head with a smile, “No, you look lovely. Always do. But I heard you tossing and turning a bit last night, didn’t sound like you got much sleep.” “Yeah, just had one of those nights,” you tried to wave him off, back to safer waters. “Are you sure you’re okay?” “Yes, I promise I’m okay,” when Ben didn’t stop looking concerned you added, “Just had some weird dreams, that’s all.” “You should’ve come hopped into bed with me. Nothing like a boyfriend to scare off weird dreams.” You forced yourself to laugh along, “Not sure fake boyfriends work so well. And it really wasn’t that bad.” He shrugged, “The offer stands for next time.” You didn’t know what else to say so you fell quiet. On one hand it was Ben. Ben who’d come to be one of your closest friends, who could make you laugh at the drop of a hat, who geeked out about sports and didn’t mind when you teased him for it. Usually you would have called him a dork and made a joke about how you’d hog the blankets or kick him in your sleep if he was unlucky enough to share a bed with you. But now that didn’t seem right. You didn’t want to lead him on at all. Didn’t want him to read more into your dumb jokes than you meant. So you let the radio fill the silence until Ben thought of a new topic. Thankfully the pub wasn’t far away, and you only had to fill a few more minutes with idle chatter until you arrived. You followed Ben inside and up to the bar where an amused barman handed over the keychain as Ben thanked him profusely. “God I would have been screwed if they hadn’t been there,” he said, relieved, as you stepped back out into the grey street. “Good thing they were there then,” you knew your tone was off, knew you should be standing closer to him in case anyone was looking, but you couldn’t bring yourself to take the step, “Where’re you parked?” “Just around the corner. Thanks for the lift, cuddle bunny,” Ben stepped close enough to pull you into a hug. Your chest tightened as you tried to stay relaxed, throwing your own arms over his shoulders like you normally would have. “Have a good day. Get some rest,” he said, kissing your cheek as he let you go. “I’ll try. Have a good day yourself.” With a wave Ben took off down the street and you got back in your car, driving in the opposite direction. It wasn’t until you were back home in your pyjamas that you realised that if Ben had heard you not sleeping, he mustn't have been sleeping either.

 Filming being over was a blessing, even if it did mean you were unemployed. It at least gave you a reprieve from being around Ben, although, as much as you didn’t want to admit it, it also felt weird to not see him every day. He’d become such a consistent part of your life, even without the whole fake dating thing, that the absence of his almost constant presence made you feel a little off kilter. You hadn’t seen him since he’d stayed the night, too nervous about how to act around him now, but you had exchanged a few texts and he called once to check that you’d caught up on sleep. It was the sort of thing a friend might do, so it didn’t make your stomach do flips the way seeing him in person did. But seeing him was unavoidable, especially after Mary called you to organise the next photo session. She gave you the time and the place and then asked if you had any concerns. You paused, weighing up whether it would be worth it to tell her. Would she tell Peter? Would it get back to Ben? ���No, that’s all good. Ben knows?” “Yes, Peter’s talking to him about it. We’ve also been talking about the argument you’ll need to have.” “Oh?” “We’re considering planting someone in the area to record it on their phone. Pictures are good but video is better.” “Okay, that, uh, makes sense, I guess. I s’pose that means we should work out what it’s going to be about.” “That would be useful, Y/N. We’re leaning towards doing it next week.” “That soon?” “Yes, that soon. There’s been an upswing in comments online about the relationship potentially being fake and we’d like to try and clamp down on those.” “People are onto us?” “No, no, there’s always a few unbelievers, we were entirely prepared for that. Every Hollywood couple has endured the same sorts of comments at one time or another, no matter how real they were. But there’s been a few more this week than there were before. We hope that if people see you being unhappy with each other, they’ll be less likely to think it’s fake because A, fake relationships should be happy and B, it’ll make you seem more down to earth, relatable. Every relationship has moments when things aren’t the best and your relationship should reflect that to seem natural.” “Okay, so next week we fight. What about this week? Should we still act super happy and loved up?” “Look, there are pros and cons for that. On one hand if you act like everything is perfect now, it’ll take people by surprise when the argument happens which some people will see as normal and some will see as more evidence for it not being real. On the other if people suspect something is happening then the argument story could lose some of its impact when it runs. Either way, if people are talking about you it’s good, so it’s really up to you and Ben how you want to play it. Maybe give him a call and figure it out before you get there.” That made you feel a little better, hopefully any awkwardness or tension you weren’t able to hide would just be seen as a couple going through a small rough patch.

You bit the bullet and rang Ben as soon as Mary hung up, while you could summon the courage. “Hey, Ben, it’s -,” “Y/N!” A few male voices in the background rose up making high pitched oooo noises and someone wolf whistled. “Sorry, I’m just in the middle of kicking these dickhead’s arses in FIFA, gimme a sec,” “Sure thing,” You hung on the line, trying to work out what you were going to say as you listened to the guys trash talking each other and controller buttons being mashed. Eventually there was a cheer from Ben followed by a hearty suck on that, wanker, and then his laughter. “Hey, cuddle bunny,” The teasing voices started buck up again, but they faded as Ben carried the phone into another room. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” he asked as he closed a door behind him. “Have you spoken to Peter yet?” Ben’s voice lowered, “You mean about the shopping photos? Yeah, he called about an hour ago, why?” “Did he mention the fight next week? “Yeah, it came up,” you weren’t sure whether the melancholy tone you heard was in your heard or not, “is that why you called, to work out what we’ll argue about?” “Not really. Um, I was more thinking about the photos this week and the sort of, um, mood they’ll have.” “Mood?” “Well, like, if we’re leading into a fight wouldn’t it make sense to, I don’t know, kind of hint what’s coming?” “I’d just assumed we’d be all over each other like usual.” “Yeah, I mean, not a huge change. We’d still like hold hands or whatever they want us to do but y’know maybe if we just like make things look a bit tense?” “Oh-kay,” there was definitely less of a smile in his voice now than before, “I don’t know if I’ll be able to pull it off though.” “You’re a good actor Ben, I’m sure you’ll manage,” “I wasn’t fishing for that but thanks. It’s more that I’ve missed hanging out with you as much since filming ended, it’ll be hard to hide how happy I am to see you.” “That’s sweet” You wondered if that was because of how he felt about you or just a change in routine throwing him off that way it had done you, “It has felt kind of odd not seeing you every day.” “So let’s just see how we feel on the day then, before we decide what we’re going to do.” “Ben you know I like to plan more than that,” “We have a plan. Go out. Hold hands while we go shopping or whatever and some guy takes our photos. Go home. That’s a pretty solid plan.” “Not quite what I meant though.” There was a muffled shout and you heard Ben cover the receiver and shout something back. “Sorry, the boys think we’re having phone sex or something,” he laughed. “No, I’m sorry, I’m interrupting, I should let you go.” “It’s okay, they can play without me for a bit,” “No, no, you go back to your game.” “Wait, we didn’t talk about what we’re gonna argue about.” “We can discuss it while we’re shopping. Wouldn’t want them to overhear you anyway. You go have fun beating your friends, I’ll see you in a couple of days.” You hung up before he could say anything, feeling more unsure than when you called.

The day of the photos you spent the trip into London psyching yourself up, reminding yourself that this was just acting, and acting was something you could do blindfolded with one hand tied behind your back. Besides, if some of your discomfort showed, it wouldn’t matter, at least you hoped it wouldn’t. Ben was already at the designated meeting spot when you arrived in the city, a photographer nearby waiting to capture your reunion. Having someone to perform for helped ease the tension that had been weighing on you. You smiled at Ben as you approached, legs feeling unsteady, heart racing. As soon as you were close enough you leaned in to steal a quick kiss and let him brush a strand of hair behind your ear, almost whispering your greetings. With the hellos out of the way he took your hand and began leading you up the street. “So where are you taking me this time, babe?” “Nowhere specific, babe,” he laughed, “They just want us to like, be out and about. I’ve been directed to walk us up this way, maybe pop into a shop or stop for a drink or something.” “Any idea how long it’ll take?” “Why? you got somewhere to be?” “Nah, just curious. I can stay for as long as the job takes.” Ben’s fingers flexed against yours, but you weren’t sure if it was in response to your statement or just a coincidence. Either way it made you worry that you were putting more emphasis than usual on this being work for you. Ben couldn’t suspect that something had changed, he couldn’t know what you knew about him. You corrected yourself by squeezing his hand and smiling up at him. As you walked you tried to treat it like you were filming a scene in a movie, just with less blocking and more improv. You were playing a role, playing the girlfriend, and nothing outside of the scene mattered, though occasionally you couldn’t help wondering what was going through Ben’s head. Was he trying to remind himself it was all manufactured or was he letting himself believe it was real? You shook your head and pulled yourself back into the scene. Together you ambled past shops, stopping to look in the windows of some, actually going into others. Inside a cute secondhand bookstore you’d seen but never been in before, Ben insisted on buying you something. He jokingly showed you a copy of the Kama Sutra, softly assuring you that the inernet would lose its mind if that book was seen in a photo. You shook your head and laughed and he put it back and let you pick something much less suggestive. You tried to tell him you could buy it yourself but he took it from your hands with a, “nuh uh, I spoil my girlfriends,” taking it up to the counter before you could protest. All the same you repaid the favour by pulling him to a halt outside a donut shop and buying the both of you a snack. It had the added bonus of giving you an excuse to drop his hand, needing both to keep from dripping chocolate ganache down your front as you continued walking. Ben wasn’t quite so neat as you managed to be, a spot of raspberry jam smeared across his lip and chin. As soon as you noticed it you pointed it out to him, earning a groan as he tried to wipe clean the wrong part of his face. “No, to the left more. My left, sorry.” “Why don’t you just get it for me?” “Really?” “yeah, c’mon. That’s the sort of cute couple thing they want. It’ll go over well on twitter with everyone who mashes our names together in hashtags.” You couldn’t think of reasonable argument not to so, with a smile you hoped didn’t seem too fake, you swiped your thumb over the patch of jam, hesitating for a second before you brought it to your lips and sucked it clean. A soft blush rose on Ben’s cheeks before your eyes and, seemingly unconsciously, he pulled his lower lip between his teeth. You didn’t want to hear whatever he might possibly say so you quickly turned to set off walking again, “So, our argument next week.” Ben shook his head, “Right, that.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “It’s gotta sound believable if there’s going to be a camera.” “Guess that rules out all the which brand of tea is best type arguments,” “Yeah, it should probably be a little more serious than that,” you conceded with a chuckle “Have you ever had a public argument before?” “Umm,” his question distracted you from the tension you’d been fighting since you arrived, “not like a full on fight but there’ve been snippy comments and disagreements. Sometimes they turned into full on fights once we were home. You?” “Once. At her parent’s place during their anniversary party.” “Yikes,” “Yeah, pretty much,” he chuckled, “We found a spare room before we really had it out, but people still heard.” “God that would have been horrible. I think my worst one was when me and my then boyfriend went out for dinner with some other mates. They were new parents and it was like their first night out since the kid was born and they were talking about how wonderful it all was,” “It’s a miracle don’t you know,” You laughed, “So they said. But they were talking about how hard it had been to start having sex again and then my boyfriend said something like it’s hard enough to get Y/N interested and that’s without a kid.” “Jesus,” “It gets worse. He had another dig at me later for not being adventurous enough and I realised it was because I’d said I wasn’t comfortable with something he wanted to try in the bedroom.” “What an arsehole. Please tell me you broke up with him on the spot,” “God I wish. I stayed with him for another two months,” you sighed at the memory, “But what about you though, what happened with the anniversary fight?” “Uh, well, it all happened pretty quickly. One second I was joking about what we’d be like at our anniversary party, the next she was saying she didn’t see us getting married and then we were in her old bedroom tearing into each other. And not in the fun way.” “Oh shit,” “It was for the best. We were way to young anyway but, still, not super fun. I don’t know if that helps us at all, with our fake argument I mean.” “Well, ours both started with small comments, right? So maybe we start with something small, like how you never put the toilet seat down?” you nudged his shoulder. He laughed, “Yeah, makes sense.” “Then we just have to work out what it builds to,” “Uhhh, things couples fight about… moving in together? Sex? Money? Control?” “Not sex. I’m invoking rule one here, sex is off limits. That’s way too close to home.” “Okay, fair enough.” “What about meeting the parents? We’ve apparently been seeing each other for three or so months now, so that’s not an unreasonable thing to argue about.” “Yeah. And we’re already both coping it from our families anyway, so they’d believe it if one of us wanted to do the family meeting thing and the other didn’t.” “Exactly. So, should I be the hesitant one or you?” “Honestly? I normally would have brought a girlfriend home by now. My parents think it’s really weird that I haven’t.” “Okay, so that makes me the hesitant one then.” “You okay with that?” “Yeah, absolutely.” You were slightly relieved at your role, figuring it’d be easier to act averse to the concept than all for it. “Let’s stop in at that café up there, talk though some things we could say. Give them a shot of us feeding each other chips or something.” Ben said with a playful smile, pointing ahead. You nodded, letting him take your hand again, returning the reassuring squeeze he gave you.

You were woken from another dream about Ben by your phone ringing. Groggily you answered. “Y/N, oh my god, is everything okay with Ben?” “Felicity?” you groaned, trying to push away the surprisingly detailed picture of Ben and you and a page from the Kama Sutra that your brain had conjured during the night. “Were you seriously still asleep? It’s midday.” “Shut up, I’m allowed to sleep in. No job, no auditions. And a shit night sleep.” “Was it because of Ben?” “Why would it be because of Ben?” you asked too quickly. “I saw the photos of you and him out yesterday. Is everything okay between you two?” “What photos?” “They’re on the Heat homepage,” You wedged the phone under your ear as you grabbed your laptop from the bedside table, willing your fingers to work a little faster as you found your way to the website. There was a gallery of photos. You and Ben smiling as you greeted each other. Walking hand in hand. Him through a shop window holding up a book and you laughing at it. You licking jam from your thumb. You paused for a second longer on that shot than the others, automatically focusing on Ben’s expression. Did everyone else see the flush on his cheeks and the look in his eyes? “Why would anything be wrong?” you asked, forcing yourself to move to the next photo, “These all look fine. Normal.” “Really? What about those last few?” Rolling your eyes you keep clicking through until you reached one of Ben, hands in his pockets, frowning a little. The next was you, sitting at the café, looking away from Ben. “Are you going to break up with him?” “What? No, definitely not. We were just talking about something kind of serious, that’s all.” “Break up serious?” “God, Felicity, no,” you almost laughed at the irony of her suggestion, “I guarantee you, we’re not breaking up anytime soon.” An idea came to you. If the world was going to see you arguing about meeting his parents then why not get the ball rolling early, “We were talking about meeting each other’s families. We haven’t done it yet.” “Really?” “Yes, really. He wants to but I’m not super keen to rush into that and it was just a kind of serious conversation. Everything is totally fine.” “Well one of the betting apps has odds up for when you’ll break up. And for who’ll actually end it. Odds are on you, by the way.”

Later that day Mary emailed to let you know the photos were working perfectly – the talk of your relationship being fake had died down – and when the argument would happen. They wanted you to go out to dinner and leave before you were finished, looking like you were on the verge of blowing up. Easy enough. You were prepared. You and Ben had hashed out some things you could use in the argument, without going so far as to write a full script. But the mention of the photos made you curious. What exactly were people saying about you now? Could anyone see what was actually going on, how one sided it all really was? In the days before the scheduled argument you found yourself looking at your own photos more and more. When you weren’t spending your time rehearsing for an audition or with your friends you were on twitter, falling down a rabbit hole of comments and reposted photos. If Felicity, or anyone else you knew for that matter, had found out she would have called you a narcissist. So you kept it to yourself. Your guilty pleasure. Seeing the comments about what a cute couple you were made you feel simultaneously pleased and queasy. You got a strange delight from knowing people believed you enough to speculate about your future, to write fanfiction about you. It was hard to pull your eyes away once you started and it definitely didn’t help you stop dreaming about Ben. The trail of reposted photos in your couple name hashtag led to compilations of screenshots of every comment Ben had left on your photos. All of them flirty and playful and beyond sweet. And he meant them. They weren’t just for show for him, they were real. The queasy feeling grew but still you kept scrolling. Day after Day as you killed time, night after night before sleep took you. Photos posted on Instagram by you or people you’d worked with on The Perfect Match, copied and reuploaded to twitter followed by screencaps of yours and Ben’s comments. Photos of the two of you on set, on dates, cuddled up on your couch. Every single one of them commented on by him. Kiss face emojis or cutesy pet names or sincere messages of attraction, love. The more you looked the more uncomfortable you felt about the whole situation. If Ben really did feel something for you beyond just friendship, then your arrangement wasn’t just unfair it was downright heartless. But, as you reminded yourself, he’d chosen it. If he’d had a crush on you and had still gone ahead with the studio’s plan, that was on him. You could hardly be blamed when you’d been working with half the information. And if it had developed afterwards then it was on him to talk to Peter and call the whole thing off if he had to. You huffed out a breath when you saw the first photo he’d posted of the two of you. The last day of filming, snuggled up in bed. My perfect match. As fucking if. You scrolled further down the hashtag and then back to his photo. The queasy feeling was lessening, being replaced with frustration and anger. Why would he have agreed to the arrangement if his crush was real? Why wouldn’t he have come up with some excuse? You’d expected him to say no anyway, it wouldn’t have surprised you or upset you and they’d had made it clear that you had the option to say no. Who was he to indulge his fantasies about you like this? Without telling you. Was he so sadistic as to enjoy torturing himself like that? If you could only ask him why. Ask how long he’d felt like that. But you couldn’t without admitting to eavesdropping and you couldn’t put an end to it anyway. You were stuck. It was enough to make you want to scream. With a long exhale you made your way to the kitchen for a calming cup of tea. As you reached into the cupboard for a mug your fingers brushed against a handle of his, the one you’d painted for him. You pulled it out and examined the lyrics you’d so carefully lettered. Why’d you have to pick that song of all things? Did he take it as encouragement that you’d picked a song with such lovelorn, infatuated lyrics? You had the sudden urge to smash the mug against the bench top. But you refrained, putting it back and grabbing another.

By the time you were getting ready to meet Ben for the dinner before the argument you were fed up with him and the whole arrangement. You couldn’t open a social media app without seeing a comment or a direct message from someone about Ben, if not from the man himself. You had no one you could talk to about it since, aside from Ben, Mary and Peter were the only people who knew your relationship was fake and neither of them was going to put an end to it if Ben wasn’t uncomfortable enough to mention it himself. Once or twice you’d considered messaging Joe, since he apparently knew everything too, but you’d chickened out every time, not sure how to go about it since you’d never met him and he was likely to tell Ben, even if you swore him to secrecy. You’d even considered telling Felicity but, though you trusted her to keep it to herself, she was kind of getting on your nerves too. Whenever you saw or heard from her, her first questions were always about Ben. She was mostly well intentioned, checking that you were happy and asking how things were between you, but sometimes she was closer to straight up gossiping – updating you on the odds given to those betting you’d still be together by the end of the month, slyly telling you what the latest article in Heat implied. And every time you were reminded of the impossible situation you found yourself in you couldn’t help but blame Ben. You wanted to have a crack at him about it, call him out for being a selfish git. But you had a job to do, and you were nothing if not professional. You went over the plan again – a snippy comment about him not putting the toilet seat down, he’d say something about a bad habit of yours, you warning him no to start something, him starting something anyway by suggesting you weren’t as invested since you refused to meet his family. Lots of crossed arms and unhappy glances and then the strained suggestion you leave. You’d walk back to his car in silence and let the photographer get a few shots before you got in and drove away. Easy.

Ben greeted you outside the restaurant with an easy grin and a complement. “Tone it down, Ben, we’re not meant to be too happy tonight.” “Hey, I’m allowed to be happy until we get into it,” he stopped talking as you went inside and found your table, waiting until the waiter had disappeared with your drink orders before he said anything more to you, “You nervous?” “Not really. It’s just acting.” “So having a public spat doesn’t bother you but you almost lost your lunch over our first date?” You looked down at the menu, “That was just because the whole situation was new and I felt weird about going on a date with you.” “Right,” he looked at his menu too. You didn’t care if it had sounded mean or if he took it personally, it was the truth, “Are you nervous?” “A little.” “Any particular reason?” “Uhh,” he drew the sound out as long as he could, “I just get more nervous before argument scenes than love scenes. I don’t know why. They’re harder to make convincing maybe?” He shrugged and made a face like it was a random suggestion pulled from thin air and not an excuse he’d come up with while stalling for time. You put the menu down and tapped your fingers on the table, looking around at the other patrons but barely taking notice of them. Ben glanced at you but only for a second. It was a relief when the waiter returned with your drinks and asked for your orders, though that didn’t help the strained silence that fell once he’d left again. “So, seen Felicity lately?” Ben asked, making a valiant attempt at polite conversation that you weren’t going to rise to. “The other day.” “How is she?” “Fine.” “That’s good. She still subscribed to Heat?” “Unfortunately. Brings you up every time I talk to her.” You huffed. Ben sighed. Even that annoyed you. You bit your tongue to stop from saying something bitchy before the food arrived. There was a plan to stick to. “How’re you going with auditions?” Ben tried again. “Okay I guess.” “Any callbacks?” “Not yet. You?” “A couple,” he shrugged, “You’ll get one soon, I’m sure. You’re too good an actress not to.” “Yeah, maybe.” Ben took a sip of his drink and sighed again, the noise grating on you, “What’s got into you tonight, Y/N?” He leaned forward and dropped his voice so as not to be overheard, “I know we’re meant to argue but you’re obviously not in a good mood anyway. Did something happen?” “Nothing, Ben. Everything’s fucking peachy.” “Doesn’t really sound like it.” “Drop it Ben.” “Fine. Suit yourself.” He leaned back in his chair and took another drink. You took a drink too, staring at the other side of the room. You hoped that the hired paparazzi was in position and getting some good shots.

The food arrived and you forced yourself to eat some of it, though you didn’t feel like it at all. Ben tried again to get you talking, asking how your meal was but you gave him another short answer. You stopped trying to eat and just moved the food around your plate. He took another drink and gave you a concerned look, “Y/N, if this is about something I’ve done, can you please just tell me.” You couldn’t hold back anymore, all thoughts of the plan, of the argument you were meant to be having, gone, “Of course it’s about something you’ve done.” “Then tell me what it is so I can try to change it.” “You can’t change it Ben.” “Not if I don’t know what we’re talking about. Just talk to me. Do I leave the toilet seat up? Do I load the dishwasher wrong?” He was trying to pull you back on track, “Whatever it is I can fix it. I never want to upset you.” His last sentence was said with such sincerity that you felt your chest constrict, “That’s what I’m talking about Ben. It’s too much.” “Babe,” he reached across to grab your hand but you pulled it back out of his reach, “What do you mean?” “I mean this – us, you and me. You’re so earnest and I can’t keep….” “Y/N, don’t.” “I can’t keep pretending that everything is okay Ben. Not when you’re posting on Instagram that we’re a perfect match and you’re calling to check up on me and acting like we’re super fucking serious. You’re clingy and needy and I can’t keep pretending I love you as much as you love me.” You bit your tongue before you could say anything more you shouldn’t and stood up, “I’m sorry. I need some space.” Ben looked completely stunned only managing to blurt your name out once you’re back was to him. With a hand over your mouth you hurried from the restaurant, able to feel the eyes of everyone in the room burning into you. There was a clatter of cutlery as Ben stood up behind you. but you didn’t know if he’d followed. You didn’t turn back.

[billhaderlovebot]

beep beep (2) - richie tozier

okay, mentions of sex, weed, and as usual, language that would make my grandmother disown me. some horror-typical blood stuff. enjoy.

@the-star-above-you @ceruleanrainblues

had it not been for richie's incredible, rugged good looks and sex appeal, as he had so tactfully put it, you were sure you would have tried to fucking murder the guy at least once, because he was infuriating at the best of times.

you'd never actually made an attempt on his life, of course, but now, as he tried to peel away from you and get out of the bed that wasn't a single but not quite big enough for two people, you almost killed him, hissing at him to lay the fuck back down right now we might die today i haven't seen you for like half my life you asshole cuddle me right now, richard.

richie, of course, as he hadn't ever been able to say no to you, smirked and shifted to lay back down, resuming the earlier position in which your limbs had become not unlike that thing where your headphones get all knotted in your bag and you can't figure out how to separate them.

"that's what i thought." you huffed, leaning up to press a kiss to the underside of his jaw.

this was almost surreal. being back here, and with the same man you left behind. it was like, the whole time you'd been apart, you'd only been half a person. and now you were back and he was holding you and you were one whole, functioning person again because he was your other half.

"i was just thinking, yknow." richie voiced, pressing a kiss of his own to your temple. "about, uh, your husband."

"i fucking hope not. that's not good bedroom etiquette, tozier, bedding a girl and then fantasising about her husband."

"shut up," he laughed. "no, i mean, you're... married." he noticeably recoiled at the word, and you visualised the nose-scrunch, because he was definitely scrunching his nose right now. god, you loved him so much.

"i noticed."

"yeah, but, babe, this isn't a very married thing to be doing, is it?" richie gestured to the bedclothes, which you were both very naked underneath, and also his shirt, which had ended up hanging from the door handle. there was underwear strewn about the place, and you literally did not know where your pajamas had gone. oh well.

"rich, when i made the decision to come here, i made the decision to leave there." it was true. you may not have known it at the time, but the moment you left that house you were never to return.

your husband might have been calling, and you'd be lying if you said you hadn't thought about him. but any calls he made would have come through in a stream of bubbles and a faint gurgling sound, what with your phone still being back home in your bathtub. being back here just proved that this was where you were always supposed to be. with him. you slid off your wedding ring, pressing it into his palm, and it was as if a weight had been lifted.

"it's always been you, richie."

and that was enough for him.

---

bill raised his eyebrows at last night's dark purple and red hickeys that littered your throat, courtesy of a one richard tozier, before joining you where you sat in the common area. you hadn't thought to pack a turtleneck, or a scarf, at that, and so you'd have to avoid everyone's inquisitive looks and make do.

when richie emerged from the kitchen, a cup of coffee in his hand and a matching set of hickeys, bill sighed.

"th-thought so." he said.

"huh?"

"thin w-w-walls, guys."

"it's not her fault im the best she's ever had." remarked richie, winking at bill and falling onto the couch beside you. he slung an arm over your shoulders and pulled you into him, sipping his coffee.

you shrugged. "yeah, billy, and it's not his fault he hasn't had a good lay since i dumped his ass in derry."

"hey! you didn't mean to dump my ass."

"ah, but i did, nonetheless."

"fuck you." richie teased, setting his coffee down on the table so he could pretend to argue with you properly.

"no, fuck you." you shot back.

"fuck both of you." a voice, eddie's, whined from the kitchen where richie had come from and interrupted your pretend dispute. "i mean, you kept me up all fucking night, fucking each other absolutely senseless in the room next to mine, you inconsiderate assholes."

"they haven't changed, eddie." bill groaned, rolling his shoulders and leaning back on the couch.

"i know that," said eddie "but i don't think i can deal with it, they're all fucking over each other!"

you supposed eddie was right.

richie, now realising you were here and he was with you and you were both within kissing distance of each other again after over two decades, he took every opportunity to shove you against a wall or a door or a sink or on a bed and kiss you hard. a lot. a lot. seriously, he'd sprung at least four impromtu heavy makeout sessions (with tongue) on you so far and it was only your first day here.

it was like you were teenagers again.

god, if only.

"w-we need to put a plan together." bill said firmly, clasping his hands together. you had noticed his stutter had been worse since you'd left the restaurant. not as bad as when you were kids, but still there. "w-w-we need everyone here, t-together, which doesn't include you two s-sneaking off to suck face."

"but she's got such a nice face." richie whined.

"she won't if you don't get your shit together." you heard the voice of ben hanscom (or, handsome, as richie now referred to him.) as he trudged down the stairs and joined you all in the living room. "so shut up and listen in case IT decides to tear it off her."

now, that had really freaked richie out, so he shrugged in defeat and pulled you tighter to him, kissing your forehead and holding you to his chest.

"good morning to you too, ben." you yawned, circling an arm around richie's waist and allowing him to just hold you.

what? he was fucking warm, ok.

"are you guys gonna be like this the whole time?" ben queried, gratefully accepting the cup of coffee eddie had just brought out for him.

"i think it's sweet." beverly was the next to come in, ruffling the back of her hair and rubbing sleep out of her eyes.

"yeah guys, we all got hot or married, and richie got less and less familiar with his fucking shower. we should be impressed he got anywhere near her." eddie chided. a chorus of laughter arose, all of you sat around the coffee table on plush couches, and you could pretend, just for a moment, that this was all you were here for. a reunion. but you weren't.

"m-mike's meeting us later." bill explained. "we have.... stuff to do."

---

the clubhouse was almost exactly how you remembered it (save for the inch-thick layer of dust and the smell of rot and the slight water damage from what must have been 27 years of rain leaks). you'd damn near punched richie in the fucking face when he pulled that "you'll float too" bullshit. his impressions were always impeccable, but now was not the time. he'd rectified his mistake by kissing you soundly and offering one to everyone else, to which they all refused.

"reckon we could still fit?" richie echoed your own thoughts as you both stared in at the dusty old hammock you'd spent so many hours on as teenagers, nostalgia coming over you in waves.

"how much you betting, trash-mouth?" you grinned, your tongue poking out from between your teeth.

"five bucks says we can."

you looked over the stretch of fabric that ben had pinned up between the boards on the ceiling all those years ago. you could barely fit on it when you were teenagers, so there wasn't much change of it happening 20-or-so years on. "i say we can't, so, ten bucks."

"done." he said, with an air of finality, and stuck his hand out for you to shake.

"nah," you shook your head. extending your little finger instead."handshakes are for businessmen and drug dealers. pinky swear."

richie hooked his pinky around yours and flashed you his signature shit-eating grin. "get ready to cough up."

a great deal of struggling later, (richie almost bringing the fucking roof down) you were considerably warmer and ten dollars poorer. the rest of the losers stared on in disappointment because the two of you were still absolutely insane. but you had done it.

granted, you'd had to twist very close around each other to fit on, and your leg was sticking out at an odd angle, but neither of you were terribly bothered.

"ten bucks, babe."

"can't i just have sex with you?" you groaned. you hadn't brought much money with you in the first place, and you really needed a coffee and a therapeutic shop for stationary.

"how about you give me ten bucks and then i have sex with you." he suggested, wiggling his eyebrows.

"i think that consistutes prostitution, actually, babe." you pointed out, kissing his lips and reluctantly pressing two folded fives into his hand. "but i do expect something by way of a sexual favour later on, provided we don't die."

"guys? important stuff is going on. yknow, like, if-we-don't-do-this-we'll get-fucking-murdered stuff." you'd forgotten that the rest of them were there, and eddie had rather pulled you both out of the bubble you were existing in.

"lighten up, eds. i just got my girl back." for once, richie wasn't joking around, and the sincerity in his voice almost made you cry. eddie didn't say anything more.

but mike did. "we have to split up to find our artefacts." he chimed in, reminding you all exactly what you were there for. "we have stan's, and i have mine. you'll know what they are when you see them."

you couldn't help but feel sorry for mike. he knew so much and had everything so planned out, but at what cost? he had been waiting alone for years and years and years, knowing full well the rest of derry depended on him not giving up, even if they didn't know it themselves.

"w-we can't split." bill interjected. "it's t-too dangerous. what if one of us d-d-d-d..." he inhaled deeply, calming himself and allowing mike to put a hand on his shoulder. "what if something happens. i won't forgive myself."

"im not letting this one out of my fucking sight, mikey." richie concurred, absently drumming his fingers where they rested on your waist. "no fucking way."

"you have to do this alone. all of you." mike continued, and you knew he was right.

ben and beverly knew it, too, and had begun making their way out of the clubhouse, the maggot-eaten wood of the ladder groaning in protest underneath their feet.

"right. a-are you s-sure, mike? really?"

"positive. this is how it has to be."

------

"okay, so if you die, we can't fuck later, and i would rather like to, so, maybe don't die, please." richie was trying to make light of possibly the worst moment of his life, but it wasn't working so well, because his hands were shaking so hard that he could barely keep ahold of you.

"i'll be fine, rich." you assured him, leaning against his chest and inhaling the scent of home.

"you don't know that, y-y-you don't-- t-there's no way you can-- y-y-you're-"

you cut him off by firmly pressing your lips to his, and it did seem to calm him. the act of holding you close and feeling the rise and fall of your chest and knowing he could touch you and you were still here. you thread your fingers through the soft hair at the nape of his neck and allowed him to deepen the kiss, knowing he needed it.

he had always needed reassurance when you were kids, because he'd always been insecure or scared about something he couldn't remember. he always went to you first, because the whole vulnerable thing wasn't really his scene, and you were the only person who saw it. and his nightmares, god, the fucking nightmares. you hadn't seen him cry before until he woke up shaking in your bed, searching around for something to grab onto because he couldn't tell what was real or not. he cried for what seemed like hours in your arms and all you could do was hold him.

"you're stuttering worse than billy." you murmured, close enough so your lips just barely touched. "ill be fine."

his eyes searched yours desperately for any sort of truth, but he could tell that you weren't sure. that you were just as shit-scared as he was and you were holding it together for the both of you.

"fuck." was all he said.

"fuck." you agreed.

---

1994

---

"baby." richie's voice was practically ecstatic down the phone. you grinned and reached over to your shelf to turn your record player, and the cure, down.

"yes?"

"i have, like, the best idea ever."

"and what would that be?"

"so, yknow, i have like, a shit ton of pot."

"uh huh."

"and i haven't seen you in like, uh, like two days. which is, fuckin, two days too long, yknow."

"yeah, of course."

"so, what say you and me get really really stoned and wait for your grandmother to leave for bingo and have a lot, and i mean a lot, of high sex."

"trash-mouth tozier, i may just take you up on that." you smirked, twirling the bright red phone cord in between your fingers.

"oh, good, cause im already here."

richie's voice was now coming from your actual window.

you whirled round to see him perched on the fire escape like a fucking curly haired pigeon with a high libido.

"god, you do know how to make an entrance, rich, fuck me."

"ask, and ye shall receive." richie smirked, dropping his legs through your window. in two strides he was in front of you, pupils dilated and partly concealed by his dark curls. his glasses were almost falling off his nose.

the phone receiver dropped from your hand and clattered to the ground as you reached up to take them off, and-

oh, and then his tongue was inside your mouth, so the glasses fell and landed alongside the phone by your bare feet.

no matter how many times you kissed richie tozier, it never failed to surprise you just how fucking good he was at it. you found yourself rather at his mercy whenever his lips were on yours, his hands on your face or in your hair or your back trouser pockets. he'd always make a point of tugging your bottom lip between his teeth and oh my fucking god. wow.

"well i can't fucking see you now, can i?" he whined, pulling away and blinking hard in an attempt to adjust to you having taken his actual sight away.

you responded by reaching your hand around to his back pocket where you knew his silver zippo would be.

"and here i thought you loved me."

richie stuck his bottom lip out in mock sadness, but grinned about two seconds after, reaching into his other pocket and handing you a small zip-lock baggie.

"you know that i love you." you smiled, kissing his lips and edging round him to get to your bed.

"you do?" he asked.

"more than anything."

----

2016

----

the zippo lighter was much heavier than you remembered it, you thought, as you turned it over and over in your hands.

you flicked it open, but no flame arose. not as though you expected it to.

god, those years were the happiest of your life. after IT. when richie and yourself could be happy and in love and kids.

just two stupid kids in love.

and your heart ached now as you thought of all the lost years. all that time you could have spent with him, watching him grow, and growing alongside him.

but you were together again, and it was alright. it was alright, now.

"beep beep, richie's girl."

the voice that came from behind you caused your heart to plummet, and you swore it could have fallen out of your ass.

"oh, fuck no. you fuck right off, right fucking now." you steadied the shaking of your hands. you were not afraid. i mean, yes, you were, very much so. but you weren't letting It see you weak.

clenching your fists, you slowly turned to look at the space near the window from which the voice had come.

oh, fuck.

it was richie.

or it would have been, if it were normal for richie to have a huge slice across his throat and a considerable amount of his left arm missing.

blood poured like a fucking faucet from the slash, forming grotesque patterns where it fell across its shirt.

"help me, baby." it choked, hands coming up to the wound, trying desperately to hold it together. it fell to its knees before you and pleaded with you to fucking help me, please and then it was crying and in that moment it's eyes looked so fucking much like his that you almost threw up.

"no, fuck no." you were seriously, seriously about to vomit right now, but you weren't about to embarrass yourself in front of a supernatural evil entity.

"please." blood came spluttering from its mouth, and you had to commend it on its honest to god phenomenal acting. it wasn't a pretty sight, honestly, because richie in any form of pain was enough to make you want to tear out your eyes, even a fake richie. but this wasn't him.

"you got it wrong." you flipped the lighter open and closed absently, hoping to whatever god would listen that the shake in your voice wasn't noticeable.

the mock expression of fear disappeared from not-richie's face.

"m not fucking scared of you. you'll only hurt me if i let you, right?" you hoped to god that you were right, because it'd be pretty embarrassing if after all that, you were torn to shreds anyway.

and then it was gone. leaving behind, scrawled in fake richie's fake blood on the wall:

beep beep, richie's girl.

you had to admire the theatrics, really.

---

richie hadn't wanted to talk about his artefact, or where he had got it, and you knew better than to push him.

he looked so fucking tense, tears in his eyes, that you just wanted to hold him and never let go ever until the earth stopped spinning. but that wasn't an option, so:

"nap?" you suggested, reaching up to thread your fingers through his hair.

his eyes fluttered shut and he leaned into your touch.

"yeah. nap."

"rich?"

"yeah?"

"i love you."

"i love you more."

"fuck you."

"no, fuck you."

[something-tofightfor]

Just a Place - Part 10

Pairing: Ryan Brenner x Reader

Word Count: 7900

Rating: M (language, implied zest)

Summary: After a difficult run in, will you and Ryan talk it out, or has something changed between the two of you? And what’s the next move? 

Author’s Note: I’d apologize for how I end this chapter, but I’m not sorry. 

Ryan’s POV

 He watched you walk through the living room and out the back door, the towel wrapped tightly around your body. She’s real mad. You didn’t look at him, but he didn’t let his fingers falter, keeping the song going even after you closed the door behind you. I shouldn’t have stopped. I should have… Ryan closed his eyes, fingers still moving over the strings, and felt his shoulders droop. The entire day had ben one misstep after another, from the conversation you’d had that morning to the way he’d zoned out in the museums, and finally to his reaction to seeing Jackie in person again. While he knew that you didn’t blame him for any of it, because they were reactions, he still felt like he’d let you down. I told her I’m in love with her and then seein’ Jackie froze me on my boots. He’d seen the hurt in your eyes, masked only by the surprise that filled them, and if he would have been able to speak, he would have told you that he felt the same - seeing Jackie with Lia and her husband hadn’t bothered him, it had simply caught him off guard - much the same way that being back in Ogden had, bringing everything that he hadn’t thought about in months back to the surface. But none of that matters.. 

 He finished the song he was playing and then without pausing, hs fingers started picking a familiar melody, jaw set as he remembered playing it on her porch, remembered her asking him to play more of it, remembered laying in bed with her and Jackie pointing out that the song was about her. Was it? He’d finished it on his way northwest to Portland, sending her a message that it was done and it was about her, but as Ryan made it past the first verse, he narrowed his eyes before closing them completely, head shaking back and forth as the words poured out. It never was. I thought it was but it… He opened his eyes again as he made it to the end of the second verse, fingers slowing as they moved over the strings. It’s not… it’s… Ryan squeezed the neck of your guitar tightly as he stopped playing, the sound trailing off. “It was never about Jackie.” Ryan swallowed, setting the guitar down and reaching for his phone. “Shit.” 

 It was after ten, meaning that he couldn’t call Ginny, and Ryan’s fingers curled around the device, teeth digging into his lower lip. It wasn’t about Jackie, because it was… He carefully slid your guitar back into the case and then stood, pacing around the room, one hand moving through his hair as his thoughts ran wild. That makes so much sense. So much sense, why didn’t ... His eyes darted to the back windows, but he knew you still needed some time, and so he didn’t run to the door, though it was all he wanted to do. He paced for a few more minutes, deep in thought, and then couldn’t wait any longer, loping up the steps without pause and taking his clothes off, digging through his suitcase for his swim trunks off before wrapping a towel around his waist. She’s gotta let me in, right? He frowned but didn’t stop, making his way back downstairs and out the door, seeing that you were facing away from the house, head tilted slightly upward to look at the stars. 

 Ryan approached you slowly, taking a deep breath, and even though the cement was cold against his feet, he stopped and waited, saying your name quietly. You didn’t respond for long moments, and when you turned your head toward him, Ryan saw that your cheeks were streaked with tears. Oh no. “Can I come in?” You stayed quiet, and when Ryan had decided you weren’t going to, you nodded once, closing your eyes and turning your head away. It’s a start. He dropped the towel, climbing into the hot tub and sitting opposite you, not knowing where to begin. Apologize. ‘I’m sorry.” You didn’t move, but he saw you open your eyes, staring upward again. “I wasn’t expectin’ to see her… to see them. Not like that.” He watched your fingers moving beneath the surface of the water, bubbles from the jet flowing through them. “I shoulda told you, when I thought I saw her, but I just figured… figured it was bein’ back here, that I wasn’t really… but it was her, an’ she…” Ryan shifted, sitting up straight. “She hasn’t yet, but she’s gonna reach out to me, probably through Lia’s account, or from her phone, or…” Ryan reached up, using one hand to wet his hair, slicking it back. “She definitely knows I’m here now, and she…”

 “She knows I’m here, too, Ry.” You finally looked at him, but he again saw only the sadness he knew you were feeling in your stare. “She still going to -”

 “Yeah, she won’t care.” He swallowed. “She wants somethin’, she’ll…” You scoffed, looking down at the swirling water. 

 “Does she still want you, Ryan Brenner?” He heard the contempt in your voice, something that was so out of character that it felt like he’d been punched in the stomach. I don’t blame her, though. “Does she... “ He moved while you were still speaking, sliding onto the seat next to yours and bringing one hand out of the water and to your chin, gripping it gently and forcing you to look at him. Your words died on your lips, and Ryan shook his head firmly. 

 “Don’t care what she wants or who she wants, because I don’t want her.” He pressed his lips together and waited, but you were too surprised to respond, so Ryan continued. “I want you.” Your eyes widened, but the look in them didn’t change. “I shouldn’t have to keep reminding you of that.” He sighed, reaching through the water with his free hand for one of yours. “But I will, because you need to hear it.” He leaned in, resting his forehead against yours. “I shouldn’t have stopped. I shouldn’t have been spacin’ out today at the Station. I shoulda been focusing on you.” 

 “Yeah.” Your voice almost too quiet to hear over the water, you finally spoke again. “You -” Ryan tilted his head, lips finding yours, but he didn’t try to prolong the kiss, knowing that it wasn’t the right call. “Ryan, what …”

 “I’m sorry.” He kissed you again, quickly, his hand dropping from your chin to your shoulder, gripping your wet skin as he twined his fingers with yours beneath the water’s surface. “I saw somethin’ on your face twice today that I … I never wanna see again.” He inhaled, curling his lip as he pressed his forehead to yours again, knees resting against your thigh as he leaned in. “”An’ I put it there.” Admitting it was the first step, but Ryan knew that it was the most important, and he needed you to know that he was serious. “This place is… I thought it was about Jackie, but it’s not, and now …” Ryan took a breath, hand moving back toward your neck, the tips of his fingers tightening at the base of it. “Now I know.” 

 The only sound was the bubbling of the water, and then Ryan heard you speak at the same time he felt you relax - slightly - under his touch. “Know what?” He felt the warmth of your breath hit his cheek, the fingers on the hand he wasn’t holding tentatively touching his ribs as the water swirled around them. “What do you know?” His heart thudding in his chest, Ryan sat up straight, waiting until you looked him in the eye to answer you. 

 “Southbound’s not about Jackie.” Your eyes flashed but you didn’t look away. “It’s never been about Jackie, even though I thought it was.” Ryan swallowed and then took a deep breath. “It’s about Ginny and Cowboy, and it… that’s why I couldn’t finish it til I got here, til … til I knew what happened to ‘im.” The same look of realization came over your face that he’d experienced, and Ryan watched as your eyebrows shot up, lips parting in surprise. “I… I’m gonna sing it with Ginny before we leave.” 

 --- 

 Your POV 

 You’d heard the door open and shut, heard Ryan’s quiet footsteps as he crossed the patio, and yet you didn’t reach up to wipe the tears from your face. No, let him see. He’d spoken to you and you heard the sadness in his voice, the hesitation, and yet you’d agreed to let him get into the hot tub with you. Because you’re an idiot. But that wasn’t it; it wasn’t idiocy that drove you to give him permission, it was the fact that you knew that his behavior earlier in the day hadn’t been the result of lingering feelings for Jackie or disinterest in you. In the time you’d known Ryan - nearly three years - you’d picked up on the fact that though he was road hardened, well-versed in tragedy and loss and struggle, he still felt everything, and often in a very different way than you would have expected. Ryan couldn’t hide his emotions or his reactions, and you were the one that had suffered from it the most in that particular instance. And this is the worst possible outcome. 

 You’d also believed that during your time in Ogden, you’d run into the woman, but hadn’t ever imagined it would be so out of nowhere, or that Ryan’s reaction would be as extreme. But it shouldn’t surprise me, you thought as he started speaking, the sincerity in his voice unlike you’d ever heard before as he apologized. But you couldn’t keep the bitterness out of your voice as you responded, the way the blonde’s eyes had slid from you to Ryan without pause fresh in your memory. Ryan’s movement toward you had taken you by surprise, though, the feeling of his fingers on your skin both welcome and enough to startle you, but the way he looked at you - along with his words - was enough to convince you that he was serious, and his touch grounded you, the gentle kisses full of meaning. He’s telling me the truth, he… 

 Ryan didn’t give you a chance to question him before continuing, and as he spoke you felt the truth in what he was saying, reaching out for him and tightening your fingers against his. The admission about Southbound stunned you, but it made sense. It wasn’t a love song - it never had seemed like one to you in all the times you’d heard it - but Ryan finally giving a voice to the way the song made him feel, what it was really about and what he wanted to do with it put the whole day into perspective for you, along with the way that you looked at Ogden as a whole. That’s why he came back. His admission about wanting to sing the song with Ginny floored you, and after staring into Ryan’s eyes for a few seconds, you nodded, reaching up to touch his cheek, the droplets of water collecting on his beard. “It wasn’t about Ogden, Ry.” He shook his head. “It was about…” You rook a breath, eyes searching his face. “Them and the way they…”

 “They’re my family.” He leaned in again, thumb sweeping over the side of your throat. “They were my only family for a while, an’...” You watched as his shoulders shook, Ryan’s breath leaving his body in one long exhale. “Now I’ve got you.” He wet his lips, scooting closer, and you moved too, allowing him. “I just needed to…”

 “I’m sorry I overreacted, Ryan.” He’d apologized to you, and you felt the need to do the same - not because you were in the wrong, but because you needed Ryan to know that you weren’t blaming him for his actions. It hurts but I know he… “I know that you don’t… I know how you feel about me, but I… she was right there, and she was looking at you, and you’d been thinking of…” 

 “I know.” He shifted on the seat, pulling on your hand and you turned so that your back was to him, your fingers sliding out of Ryan’s grasp. “I think,” he said as his hands moved to your shoulders, thumbs digging in, “that… I didn’t know what to think, until I got here.” You closed your eyes and flattened your palms on your thighs, Ryan releasing your shoulders as he gathered your hair into both hands, pushing it over one of them. “And then it all… seein’ Ginny and Henry, the mountains, the … I’ve got memories here, and the more I thought about ‘em, the more real it all was, you know?” He was kneading your skin with his hands, Ryan’s calloused fingers moving over your shoulders and upper back, your body relaxing by the second. “I didn’t… I didn’t see her an’ think ‘oh there she is, that’s what I’ve been missing’, I was just surprised, because the way she looked at me, through that window? She didn’t look at me like that for weeks before I left, and…” He stopped, and though both of his hands - warm and wet - were near your spine, you felt his lips against the top ridge of your shoulder, lingering for long seconds before he continued. “I wasn’t expectin’ it.”

 You’d seen the look on her face; the shock in her eyes, the way her lips had quivered just slightly as they parted, but you’d seen that her gaze had been locked on Ryan - on his face, on the man that she hadn’t seen in years but still had some sort of feelings for. “I wasn’t either, Ryan.” You sighed again, his hands working their way down the center of your back as his lips trailed over your shoulder and against your neck. “I didn’t…. don’t like seeing her look at you like that, because…” You looked down, chin near your chest. “Because I know there was a time when you looked at her like that, too.” You felt the movement of his hands falter, but Ryan’s lips didn’t, your name coming out in a quiet breath. His past was his past, but that didn’t mean that you wanted to be presented with it up close - and you had been. “She looked at you like I look at you, Ryan, like she l-”

 “Jackie didn’t ever love me.” His beard scraped against the thin skin of your throat, Ryan’s voice low in your ear. “If she did, she woulda understood that I needed to be me, and she wouldn’t have…” You turned your head to the side, Ryan’s hands at the center of your back, and his face only inches from yours. “She didn’t look at me like you do.” He leaned in, nose brushing against yours as he sought out your lips, your eyes dropping briefly. I’m still upset, but… “And I never saw her the way I see you. Stop comparin’ yourself to her.” You were nodding before you’d even realized it, turning your entire body toward Ryan’s, both arms going around his shoulders as you allowed yourself to be pulled onto his lap. 

 “I hate feeling like this, Ryan, it makes me…” You kissed him, closing your eyes and then squeezing them shut. “Makes me feel…” Small. Stupid. Like I don’t deserve you. 

 “I’m glad you do.” He groaned as his hands moved up and down your sides, lips on yours, teeth scraping gently over your skin. “Because you mean it.” You hummed quietly, waiting, and Ryan didn’t make you wait long. “You wouldn’t be upset if you didn’t care, an’ you’re real upset.” I am. Ryan’s lips were on yours again, kiss more insistent, but he still wasn’t trying to take it further; holding you but not pulling you, keeping you in place on his lap but not forcing you to stay. “Tell me what to do.” You swallowed, feeling his lips move with each word, and you closed your eyes again, moving your fingers through the damp hair at the base of his neck, thinking. Do I keep going? Do I let this… is it over? 

 “I don’t want to be jealous of her, Ryan.” You licked your lips, head shaking back and forth twice. “Because I know I shouldn’t be, but I’m…” Your mind raced. What am I? “I hate her, Ryan, for what she tried to do to you, and I hate that you felt anything for her and that she…” You were crying again, the frustration that you’d felt toward the woman for the whole time you’d known of her pouring out - and misdirected at Ryan. “I hate that she still thinks she can…” 

 “She can’t.” He was holding you more tightly, chests pressed together. “I told you, it wasn’t because I wanted to stop, I just… wasn’t expectin’ it, and after what happened between you an’ me earlier, I… it was too much of a coincidence.” His hand left your side and cradled the back of your head, Ryan urging you to sit up straight and look at him. “I’m here for Ginny and Henry. That’s it. Here with you.” He leaned in. “And after Ogden? We’re going to go get our stuff and go to the next place, just like we planned.” He was determined, you could hear it in his voice, and you nodded, feeling your chest grow tight. We are. 

 “I know, Ry.” You took a deep breath, pulling your hand away from the back of his head and placing it against his chest, feeling his heart beating beneath your palm. “That’s what I want.” He looked relieved and you felt relieved, trying to smile at the man in front of you. “We haven’t had a real…” You paused, thinking, and Ryan’s hands rested against your hips, thumbs hooked beneath the elastic of your bathing suit bottoms, slowly rubbing against the skin there. “A real fight or -”

 “This isn’t a fight.” You watched as his lips twitched into a slight smile, his dark eyes moving over your face. “This is both of us realizin’ that we…” Ryan’s eyes closed, head rolling back and forth before he looked at you again. “That we’ve been keepin’ some feelings from each other at the same time we got …” One eyebrow lifted, Ryan’s eyes still on yours. “Reminded of the past.” The past. She’s his past. “I’m not gonna fight with you.” Ryan bit his lip. “Won’t do any good, cuz you’ll just win anyway, so…” You laughed at that, quietly but it was enough, and Ryan leaned in to kiss you again, lips soft on yours, fingers tightening on your skin. “I -”

 “Love you, Ryan.” You shifted on his lap, relaxing against his chest as Ryan repeated the words to you, both of you sinking further into the hot water. “You think Ginny’s gonna want to sing with you? I know you guys …”

 “She used to. She’s got a better voice than I do, an’ even if she hasn’t used it in a while, I’m sure she… when I explain, I’m sure she’ll…” He sighed, both arms around you. “That’s my second favorite song I’ve ever written, you know that?” 

 “I didn’t, Ryan.” He was tracing over your thigh with one long finger, his chin resting on your shoulder. “But second? I figured it -”

 “First is the one that I wrote right after we met. The one I played for you on Christmas?” What? “That song’s for you, no doubt about it.” He paused, turning his head so that he could speak directly into your ear, voice barely audible over the sound of the hot tub. “Knowin’ that you’d heard that song at least once made me happy.” He kissed the side of your face and you felt him wrinkle his nose before his teeth closed around your earlobe, pressure gentle but still making you shiver, though the water was steaming hot. “Gettin’ to play it for you that first time in your basement?” Ryan groaned, nuzzling against your shoulder and pulling you closer. “Best feeling I’ve ever…” Your heart pounding, you pulled yourself off of Ryan’s lap and stood abruptly, turning to face him. 

 You felt the cold air hit your skin immediately, watching Ryan’s eyes drop to your chest and then rise again, settling on your face. “Was it?” He nodded, chest rising and falling rapidly. “I know you, Ryan Brenner.” You stepped back toward him, Ryan’s legs parting so that you could stand between them, your fingers trailing down his bare chest while the other hand combed through his hair, pushing the dark strands away from his face. “And I know you mean what you say.” He stayed quiet, watching you, but you felt his hands on the backs of your thighs, moving in slow circles. “But so do I.” You chewed on your lower lip for a few seconds, thinking, and then tilted your head to the side. “So I’ll never keep how I’m feeling from you, because that won’t…” You smiled, blowing out a deep breath. “That won’t help, and I know that, so…” You shrugged, fingers closing on his hair and tugging. “So I’m not gonna do it again, starting now.” 

 “Good.” He grinned at you, and you could tell that he was ready to say something else, though he stayed quiet. What? “I don’t want you to.” He leaned forward, looking up at you as he gripped your legs, holding you in place. “You gonna sit back down, or…?” Am I? You watched him, searching his face, and after only a few seconds, you’d made a decision. None of this matters. He’s here with me. He wants to be, and I want…

 “No.” You stepped back, pulling your hands away from Ryan, but didn’t break eye contact. “I’m going to bed, and I want you to come with me.” 

--- 

 Ryan’s POV 

 The following two days passed quickly - him spending an afternoon with Ginny and Henry while you drove around Ogden, taking pictures one day, and then the four of you meeting for dinner at the house the next, you throwing together a meal of spaghetti and meatballs and entertaining Henry while Ryan and Virginia practiced his song. She’d been more than willing to sit and listen to his explanation of writing Southbound and why it had taken so long for him to realize what it was about, but she’d been apprehensive about singing with him. She doesn’t need to be. Ginny’s voice had been perfectly suited to the melody, and after playing it a few times for her, as well as giving her a lyric sheet, the two of them had gone through it together, trying different things out. It felt good to be singing and playing with Ginny again, the woman using Cowboy’s guitar, Ryan sitting on the couch with your dad’s in his hands. This is right. 

 By the time the two of them left your rental on the fourth night in Ogden, making plans to have Ginny’s parents watch Henry so that the three of you could go out for a few drinks after recording on the second to last night you’d be in the city, Ryan had pushed the stress of the first 36 hours of the trip to the side, focusing on you and Ginny - and on Henry. The dinosaur museum was closed, but Ryan had spent a few hours with the boy while Ginny ran errands, and as the minutes passed, he realized that there was no way that he could remain out of the his life - or Virginia’s. Telling her as much as she packed her stuff to leave your place, Ryan was surprised to see tears gathering in the corners of Virginia’s eyes, her pale fingers reaching up to wipe them away. 

 “I didn’t think you’d come, Ry.” She sniffed and shook her head. “I pushed you away for so long, I had no right to expect…” 

 “You’re family, Ginny. You and Henry always will be. An’ it might take me a minute,  but I’ll always be here for you.” He gestured around them to the large, open room with one hand, reaching out to squeeze one of her hands with his other one. “It’s not like it was before, I’m not… I’ve got some money saved now, Gin, so if you guys ever need anything, just…” 

 “Just need you, Ryan. Henry will need you too, because you’re the only other one to… that knows his daddy like I did.” She smiled at him, the expression softening her features. “He’s still young, but he’s gettin’ bigger, and he’ll…”

 “I’ll be here, Ginny.” Ryan pulled her to his chest, hugging the woman tightly. “Whenever you need me.” 

 They’d left just before seven, and you and Ryan had changed clothes before ordering a car to take you back downtown and to the brewery that he’d told you about, which was crowded - but not too crowded. A few drinks in, the two of you were having a good time, sharing stories of travel along with flights of beer, wanting to sample the local brews before committing. This is nice. You hadn’t had much downtime together in the prior few months, and though the future was uncertain, Ryan was enjoying just relaxing with you. This is what Ogden should have been like. This is what me bein’ happy feels like. He watched you as you talked to the bartender, pointing out things on the menu and asking questions, and Ryan leaned back in his chair, the sounds of the people around you a dull, comforting buzz. 

 Around eleven, you ordered food, choosing a bunch of different tacos and two appetizers - the beehive cheese curds and dirty fries - Ryan grinning at you over the rim of his glass as you teased him about always being hungry. Tryin’ not to be hungover tomorrow at this point. While you waited you ordered more drinks, and as the bartender set them down in front of you, he was surprised to hear you say his name, turning his head to find that you’d leaned in, eyes focused on his face. “What?” The word slipped out with a laugh, but before he could say anything else, you were kissing him, one hand flat on the bartop, the other one gripping his thigh. This is new. When you pulled away, laughing quietly, he raised one hand, pushing your hair back and tucking it behind your ear. “What’s gotten into you tonight?” 

 You shugged, staring at him and drawing your lower lip into your mouth and between your teeth. “Just having fun, Ryan. I like you like this.” You winked, leaning back and raising your glass, taking a long drink of your newest beer - a lager that he’d tasted and enjoyed, too. “That alright?” More than alright. The rest of the night passed quickly, the two of you piling back into a car and heading to the rental a little after 1 am, your head resting on Ryan’s shoulder as the darkened streets of Ogden flew by. “This was fun.” It was. He kept his hand on your back as you typed in the door code, following you into the house and foregoing turning the lights on to trail upstairs after you in the dark. This could be… 

 He waited until you brushed your teeth to head into the bathroom, doing the same, and by the time he walked back into the bedroom, you were laying in bed, face illuminated by the glowing screen of your phone. He watched you from the doorway for a few seconds and then stepped back across the room, taking his shirt off and dropping it onto the floor before reaching into his pocket and pulling out his own phone, tossing it onto the bed before taking his jeans off. “You good?” You nodded, the pillow rustling beneath your head as Ryan climbed into bed, pulling the blanket over himself. “I’m glad.” He took a few deep breaths, picking up the phone and unlocking it, his breath catching at the alert on the screen. Shit. Ryan felt his body stiffen and knew that you had, too, based on the way you darkened your own screen and rolled to face him. 

 “What’s wrong?” His eyes scanned the message and Ryan grimaced, reading through it before he handed the phone to you, still not saying anything. “Oh.” You exhaled, reading out loud. “Ryan - I wanted to message you the other night, but didn’t. I know that you said everything you had to say to me on the phone, but I know you’re in Ogden… or at least you were. If you’re still here, I want to see you, maybe meet for lunch or a coffee or something. I tried calling you, but I’m guessing you blocked my number, so if you want to catch up, just get back to me through here.” You took a deep breath and Ryan watched your jaw work as you stared at the screen. “Or you can call me.” You turned your head to look at him, the light from his phone catching your eyes. “You gonna answer it?” He answered immediately. 

 “Definitely not tonight.” You didn’t speak, and he continued. “She can see that I read it, so if I ignore it, she’ll know that I’m not interested in talking to her, but -”

 “You should respond to it, Ryan.” You scooted closer, his screen gong dark and eliminating most of the light in the room. “One way or another, just… don’t leave the door open.” You were right, but Ryan still didn’t know how to respond. “You’ve only got two days before we leave, and -” 

 “I’ll tell her no, tell her that I don’t want to see…” He watched as you gave him a skeptical look. “What?” 

 “Ryan, she saw you. She saw me. She still reached out, and…” You laid a hand on his abdomen. “Telling her no isn’t going to…”

 “You think I should go?” He waited for your response, rolling onto his side to face you. “I would have thought that you-” 

 “Maybe she needs closure? She’s been married for a while now, Ryan, maybe it means nothing that she wants to see you, maybe…” Yeah, right. That’s not how this works. Not with Jackie. “I know she -”

 ‘“Do you want to meet her?” The words slipped out before Ryan could stop them and he heard you swear under your breath. “I mean, I know you don’t want to meet her, but…” He waited, and you didn’t respond. “I-”

 “She wouldn’t agree to that, Ryan. She doesn’t want me, she wants -”

 “That’s not how this works.” He leaned in, catching you off guard and kissing you, voice firm. “She wants to see me, she’s gonna see me on my terms, and I don’t… won’t leave you outta that, unless you don’t want to go.” He sighed, kissing you again, and was relieved when he felt your fingers against his side, running over the lines of his tattoo as you pulled yourself closer to his chest. “I’ll message back  tomorrow, and…”

 “Invite her to bring her husband, Ry.” You mumbled the words, voice slow and full of the onset of sleep. “Bet she won’t bring him.” No she definitely wouldn’t. 

--- 

 The next afternoon, you and Ryan parked in a small lot in front of a bakery called Kneaders, but once you put the car into park, you made no move to get out. “You ok?” He leaned over, reaching for you, and after a few seconds of quiet, you looked over at him, a bright - though somewhat forced smile on your face. 

 “Yes. Who wouldn’t be alright when they were about to meet their boyfriend’s ex, who for some reason is still trying to contact him after nearly four years and -” You cut yourself off, closing your eyes. “I can’t promise I’m going to be nice, Ryan, not the whole time anyway.” He laughed, squeezing your hand. 

 “Wouldn’t expect you to.” You looked back at him, a surprised expression on your face. “I’m just glad you’re here with me.” Your smile softened and you nodded. “Look, we do this… no more than an hour, and then we go back and wait for Ginny to come over to record, and then the three of us go out and have fun.” That’s all I want right now, just you and Ginny and that song, but… “We should go in, though, the longer we…” You were moving before he was done speaking, pulling the keys out of the ignition and getting out of the car, hood pulled up to combat the wind as you walked to his side of the car. It was snowing - just lightly, but you still stopped, waiting for him to step next to you. He reached for your hand, squeezing it once and then you moved to the door as Ryan’s arm wound around your waist and pulled you to his side. Here we go. 

 The inside of the cafe was nice - and Ryan would have felt out of place had he stopped in on his previous trips to Ogden, but standing next to you as you eyed your surroundings, he was comfortable. Jackie had picked the place, and as the two of you made your way inside, he realized why. She wanted to throw me off, wanted to make me focus on her and not… shit. “Fancy.” You leaned in, whispering the  word into his ear. “This somewhere you’d come when -”

 “No, not even close.” He turned his head to face you, feeling himself smile. “I’d be fine with a black coffee from a gas station, but…” You laughed, leaning into his shoulder, and Ryan felt a warmth that had nothing to do with the building you were in. “Want to order or should we -”

 “She’s over there, Ry. I saw her when we walked in.” You pulled your hand from his, reaching up to push your fingers through his hair. “Should probably go and introduce me first, and then I can go order while you… catch up.” You looked worried - but just for a second - and Ryan nodded, leaning in to press his lips against yours quickly, hearing the quiet intake of your breath. Nothin’ to worry about. 

 “Let’s get this over with.” He stood up, slowly turning to look through the seating area, which had more than a few people sitting in it, but Ryan found Jackie quickly, sitting at a small table near one of the front windows. She was wearing a tan coat, unbuttoned, but the red scarf still around her neck looked familiar. Is that?  You started walking first, heading for the woman, and Ryan followed, his heartbeat quickening with each step. “Hey, Jackie.” His voice sounding foreign to his ears, Ryan stopped next to the table where she sat, staring down. “How are you?” He watched as Jackie’s eyes widened again, her gaze settled on his face. Her hair was down and longer than it had been the last time he’d seen her in person, and though her face looked much the same, he saw that she looked tired, even though she had a small smile on her lips.

 “Ryan.” The way she said his name made him want to step back, but Ryan felt you next to him, your fingers again wound tightly with his, and so he stayed put. “It’s so good to see you. You look -”

 He cut Jackie off, nodding and clearing his throat. “Thanks.” Ryan glanced down, taking a deep breath before he introduced you by name, squeezing your hand tighter. “Where’s your h-”

 “He couldn’t make it, Ryan.” Jackie relaxed into her seat, still staring at Ryan, and he realized that she hadn’t even glanced at you, instead staying focused on him. Wow. “Had to work, so it’s just us.” She picked her mug up - and Ryan noticed that she was drinking tea instead of coffee. “Sit?” She used her tongue to dry her lips as she set it down, gesturing at the seat across from her. “You’ll have to pull up a second chair for her, but…”  Ryan caught the slight tic of her jaw as she referenced you, but instead of taking the seat, he pulled it out for you, gesturing for you to sit before he turned to his left, pulling an empty chair from a nearby table. As he settled in, Ryan debated over whether or not to put an arm around the back of your chair but chose not to. No reason to antagonize her, not until I know what she wants out of this. “So how have you been, Ryan? I’ve seen your Instagram, you’ve played a lot of places, and written a lot -”

 “I have.” He cleared his throat, leaning forward slightly. “Learned a lot in the last couple years, made some new friends, wrote a lot of new music, and it’s good.” Ryan smiled as he thought about the places that you’d been as time passed. “Been recordin’ with a lot of people, and…”

 “Recording?” She sounded surprised, leaning in too. “In a studio? I thought you -”

 “No.” He leaned back, looking over at you and seeing that you were watching him intently, a lopsided smile on your face and a calm look in your eyes. Good. She’s fine. “Just at home, or in our place, or…” He shrugged. “A studio’s great and all, but it’s not what I’m lookin’ for, and it’s one of the reasons we’ve been moving around so much, because it’s easier to see the people I need to see that way.” He watched Jackie’s eyebrows raise, the woman taking another drink of her tea. No ring, why isn’t she wearing her… “How ‘bout you, Jackie? Lia’s messaged me a couple times, seems like she’s … doing well.” 

 “She is. She’s so damn smart, Ryan, she wanted to see you too, when she found out that you were here, but she’s in school and…” Jackie’s voice changed as she talked about Lia and Ryan couldn’t help but smile, thinking of the girl. “She’s still playing your guitar, and she’s gotten so much better, we play together a couple nights a week and it’s…” Jackie reached over, stopping herself from touching Ryan’s hand and he had to force himself not to pull it back. “I don’t know why I never thought of trying to teach her, but now it’s like…” Jackie pressed her lips together. “You gave her somethin’ that I couldn’t, and…”

 “I’m glad, Jackie. You’ll have to tell her I said hi, that I’m sorry I missed her, woulda liked to see…” Ryan ran a hand through his hair. “Maybe I’ll message her, see how she’s doin’.” He looked over at you. “You want somethin’ to drink? We’ve been sitting here, and…”

 “Yeah, I can go order, do you want anything to eat?” He nodded, glancing over his shoulder at the menu.

 “You pick, you know what I like.” When he looked back at you, he saw that you were holding back a grin, agreeing as you stood. “You need -”

 “Nah, I got it.” You paused before heading to the counter, looking back at Jackie and addressing her directly. “Can I get you anything, Jackie?” Ryan’s eyes flicked to the blonde, waiting for her response. “Another tea, or maybe a muffin or…”

 “More tea would be great, thanks.” She pushed the mug across the table. “Herbal, the citrus?” You reached out, picking up the mug and nodding. “Maybe some of the cinnamon bread?” You didn’t reply before you turned, but Ryan knew you were annoyed, and though he wanted to look after you as you headed to order, he didn’t, instead turning back to Jackie and staring at her. Alright, you’ve got me alone, what do you really want? “You look incredible, Ryan.” Jackie leaned in, shoulders dropping. “You look...happy.” 

 “I am.” He gestured to you with one hand, staring at Jackie. “We are. She an’ I have been movin’ across the country, renovating houses and just… it’s been nice. I still get to travel and see the world, but it’s…”

 “What does she do?” Jackie sniffed. “She have a job, or -”

 “She’s a photographer. Had a couple gallery shows last year.” Ryan looked down at his hands, fingers knotted on the tabletop. “Was livin’ like me before we even met, and she understands me, Jackie. What I need and who I am.” He met the woman’s eyes again, narrowing his. “What I want. She’s supportive of my music, and … and it’s a nice change from everything bein’ so uncertain.” Jackie let out a breath, her thumb moving over her ring finger as if seeking out the band she usually wore. “I’m in love with her, Jackie. Have been for a while, and it’s… There’s never been anything like it before for me.” It was true, and though Ryan knew it was probably hard for the woman to hear, he didn’t want to sugarcoat anything. 

 “So you’ll stay with her.” Jackie set her lips in a straight line, staring at him. “Just meet her and stay with her and it’s no big deal but when -”

 “It wasn’t like that.” Not that it’s any of your business. “We met and spent a weekend together in Vegas, but it wasn’t… we both left, both went back to our lives after that, and it … there was a connection, Jackie, right from the beginning. We didn’t even see each other in person for almost a year after that first weekend, andd then I got hurt, and then when we did find each other again, it just… made sense. Both of us just want… I realized what’s important to me, and that’s why I stopped with the trains, stopped with the…”

 “Hurt?” She was concerned again, this time not stopping as she reached out and laid her hand on his sleeve. “What did… are you OK?” 

 “I’m fine now, but I got sidelined in St. Louis for months because I broke my wrist, couldn’t do anything about it, and…” Ryan shrugged, pulling his hand back and rubbing at his arm, his fingers pressing down on the tattoo there. “Made me think about a lot, Jackie, about what was important, what I needed, and what -”

 “She didn’t come get you? Didn’t come to you when you were -”

 “No.” He spoke the single word as a warning, voice dropping. “No, I lost my phone when I hurt myself, and she didn’t have any way of gettin’ ahold of me, and I couldn’t reach her either.” Ryan’s nose twitched as he leaned all the way back in his chair. “Worst three and a half months of my life, not bein’ able to let her know I was alright.” Jackie closed her eyes, collecting her thoughts. “So when I found her again, in a park in Philadelphia? Knew I had to do somethin’ about it. I was done with the road, done travelin’. I was only going back up the coast to see Georgie one more time, say goodbye, and it wasn’t… I shouldn’t have found her. She shouldn’t have found me, but we did. And I can’t ignore that.” 

 “Of course you can’t.” Jackie looked down at her own hands, the sleeves of her sweater pulled to her knuckles. “I guess I always thought, Ryan, that you came back to me once, so you’d do it again, when you got the … when you wanted to settle down?” Jackie ran a hand through her hair, a quiet laugh reaching his ears. “You never gave me a chance, Ryan, not a real one.” Yes I did. “When you said you’d stay here, with me… with us, I said I needed you to try, to get a job, to want to…”

 “I did, Jackie. But it wasn’t enough. Ogden wasn’t enough, bein’... in the middle of a family wasn’t enough. I needed  to do things on my own because I wanted to, not because you told me to.” He looked down and then back over his shoulder at you, seeing that you were next to order. “I needed to build my own life, not let someone… move things around and make space for me.” She inhaled, holding her breath, and Ryan kept going. “I told you on the phone that I didn’t want to come back  and see you, I didn’t need to, that I didn’t… I wasn’t going to make decisions for you.” Ryan pointed at her hand. “You’re not wearin’ a ring right now, but you were with your husband the other night. You got married, Jackie, so that means that you gave up on me comin’ back, or … at the very least, don’t want it as much anymore.” It was the most he’d ever said to the woman in one conversation, but Ryan felt good about being honest with Jackie, face to face. “We had a few good days, Jackie. Some good times when I was here, but that’s it.” He leaned in, lowering his voice. “What is it that you said, sometimes people just come through to tell you somethin’ and it’s alright that they go? That’s what I did. And it is alright. Because you met him and I met her, and I’m supposed to be with her. It feels right, and that’s not gonna change.” 

 “Does she know?” Jackie swallowed, eyes glistening. “Does she know what I meant to you, what -” You didn’t… it didn’t… 

 “She knows everything.” He felt his lip curl. “And there’s nothing that you can say or do that’s going to change my mind, Jackie. I don’t -”

 “Sorry that took so long.” You returned to the table, a small tray in one hand and a drink carrier in the other. “Decided to get a bread and pastry sampler, so…” Ryan reached over, automatically taking the tray from your hands and setting it down, your quiet thanks following. “Only one cinnamon bread so you can have that, Jackie, but…” You lowered yourself into your set, and Ryan watched as you looked first at him and then at Jackie, frowning. “Everything OK?” There was a few seconds of quiet and then Jackie’s expression changed, her lips shifting into a wide smile. 

 “Yes. Everything’s great, Ryan was just telling me about how the two of you met.” She licked her lips, and Ryan watched as she unwrapped the scarf before shrugging out of her coat. “But if you’ll excuse me for a few minutes, I just have to…” Jackie slid sideways on the booth bench, and then as she stood, Ryan felt his eyes widen. What? “I’ll be right back.” Jackie passed by him, and Ryan felt her hand brush up against his shoulder as she moved. That was on purpose, but… she… He waited to speak and then turned in his seat to look at you, seeing that your eyes were wide and you were watching him with one eyebrow raised. “I… is she…”

 “Ryan…” You reached toward him, laying your hand atop his on the table. “Are -”

 “She’s pregnant?” His voice low, Ryan shook his head. “She’s acting like this and she’s…” Jesus. 

 --- 

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[blondie1locks]

Eddie Spaghetti

This is a sick fic, and paring is  Reddie, enjoy!

The losers club got together very often, they would go to the quarry, ride into town on their bikes, and well go anywhere Henry Bowers wasn't. The one thing they enjoyed the most though was Movie Night. Every Friday night the losers would get together at someones house, ok fine every Friday night the losers would get together at Ben’s house because he was the only one who had both a TV and normal parents. Nobody would EVER miss it, well that was probably because it had only been going on for about a month, but still they had a record. So of course when Eddie woke up feeling off he knew he just couldn't miss movie night, they would all expect him to be the one to break the record, he wasn't sick nearly as much as his mother said he was, but he did get sick like a lot. He woke up in his bed sheets sticky with sweat, and just brushed it off his head was pounding, so he decided to get some Advil when he went downstairs, but being sure not to be too obvious about his pain so that his mother would let him go to school. He put the Advil in his fanny pack and walked up to the breakfast table in his red stripped shirt and fairly short shorts. “Eddie, Honey don't forget to take your pills!” He heard his mom call from the next room over as she put in her earrings. “I wouldn't dream of it Ma.” He replied simply. Sonia walked into the room and began making eggs. “Eddie you look a little pale did you sleep alright?” “You know pale skin can be caused by reduced blood flow, or oxygen, oh goodness it can also mean you have a decreased number of red blood cells!” “Oh Eddie this is not good maybe we should go to the Doctor so he can make sure...” She was cut off by Eddie “Ma, Im fine I just am a little uh hungry.” She looked a little skeptical, but gave in anyways “Oh alright well then you better eat a lot of eggs this morning.” He gulped quietly even the thought of eating anything much less a large portion of it made his stomach twist up in knots, he just prayed he could keep these eggs down. “Yes mommy.” He ate his eggs and he felt his stomach gurgle, He would be fine he thought, yes as soon as he got to school he would be fine. He hopped on his bike and pedaled slowly, much slower than usual, maybe this was because he felt very weak and tired, or maybe so that he wouldn't be seeing the eggs he just ate on the sidewalk in front of him. Whatever the reason he couldn't keep it up for long, once he got to the next turn the losers would be there waiting for him, and they would know something was up if he biked this slowly. Then a thought crossed his mind, what if he was late?! Eddie Kaspbrak had never once been late to school, he would miss from time to time when he was sick, but never was he late. Then another thought crossed his mind, What if the losers had gone with ought him?! He could not get this thought out of his head, he felt the walls of his brain closing in on him, and his airway getting tighter, he reacher into his fanny pack and puller out his inhaler. Taking a puff from it made these sensations almost immediately go away, but the taste made him gag, he felt a trail of spit and mucus fall off his bottom lip. Thank god he had not thrown up, was all he could think. Rounding the corner he saw that all the losers were there waiting for him. He felt very relived, but then he remembered that he would have to pick up his pace by quite a bit in order to suppress suspicion and to keep up with his friends. “Hey Eddie over here, You good?” He heard Bev say “Uh, yeah I’m fine.” He plastered on a fake smile “You look like shit dude, rough night with your mom, because I know I had one, You should have seen her all over me Eds...” “Beep Beep Richie! Fucking Beep beep Trashmouth.” “Oh Eddie Spaghetti you know you secretly love your future step dad!” “Shut...the fuck....up.” Eddie said “C-c-come on guys we are g-go-gonna be late for s-s-sch-school.” Bill said “Yeah hurry the fuck up Eddie.” Richie said. But Eddie could not hurry up the only thing he could to was slowly ride his bike while attempting to not gag, he felt like when his mother had brought him to church, it was so hot and stuffy, it made him feel almost faint, and he had kept gagging and coughing, so they had to leave. It was actually exactly like that, his knees buckled similarly to how they did when he had to kneel on the kneelers, and he felt stiff and uncomfortable like he was sitting on the hard wooden pew, he felt like the air was filled with sweat and it was hard to get a good breath, but this time it was not the sweaty air of the people in the church but his own. Eddie tried to peddle faster but his legs ached like they had not been used in 20 years and his head pounded like he had been punched in the face. “Coming.” Was all he could say, and he was but just rather slowly. The worried looks on his friends faces was enough to make him forget his pain, he HATED being fussed over, so he quickly peddled past his friends and they all laughed, including him. They arrived at school and the whole day Eddie felt like he was on one of those roller coasters that spun around and around and around, and went upside down while spinning, the kind that kicked your shoes off if they weren't lace ups. Twice he had to excuse himself (With permission of the teacher of course) To go to the bathroom and gag, he thought he would throw up, and he thought it might even feel better if he threw up, but all he was left with were dry heaves, and trails of spit humiliatingly leaving his mouth rolling off his bottom lip. The end of the day bell came and went and Eddie and his friends walked toward their homeroom, well more like Eddie, Richie, Ben and Bill, you see Beverly was two grades older than them, and Stanley was one grade below, not younger, because he really was their same age, he had just had to be held back, and not because he was dumb like Henry Bowers, oh no Stanley was smart. “Quite a smart cookie” his mom had said and she was right, he had been held back because he had to start school late, he was a rather sickly kid in Kindergarten, a trait which he outgrew, but unfortunately Eddie did not. They all biked over to Bens’s house happy to see Mike at the door step waiting for them. Mike was still homeschooled, so they didn't see him quite as much as they wished they did, but he always was there after school waiting for them to get out, and always wanting to know if anything interesting happened that day. Then the losers would all tell him about what happened and there was lots of laughter at this part of the day. “Guys, what movie do you want to watch?” Mike asked “I think we should watch the mummy, it will be scary for both Ben and Eddie!” Richie said “And I can fill Eddie in on all the details of how I fucked his mummy while he hides his face in my shoulder!” everyone laughed including Eddie but he still said “Shut the fuck up Richie” Between laughs. Eddie hated scary movies, but the losers had a habit of watching them, so like Richie had said Eddie would usually hide is face in Richie’s shoulder. They went inside and turned on the movie, but Eddie was so tired he felt like he just had to go upstairs, even if it wasn't his house. Ben’s house had 2 stories and a couch on each one, so Eddie asked Ben if he could go upstairs because he was tired and of course Ben said yes. “Aw come on Eds we don't really have to watch the mummy.” Richie said “Yeah we can watch something not scary.” Bev added “Don't listen to them Eddie if your tired you should go to sleep and come down later, it wouldn't break our record, don't be bribed by these fuckers.” Stan said in response. “Just down hook up with Ben’s Mom!” Richie cried as Eddie walked up the stairs earning him a middle finger from Eddie. An hour later Eddie woke up feeling like death itself and walked down the stairs. His throat hurt and his hair was all tanged, the losers were in the middle of a 2 hour long movie and It was pretty loud so nobody heard Eddie coming down the stairs “Richie” Eddie said in a horse voice he not only felt like death he sounded like death too all the losers whipped their heads around and Richie said “Oh my God Eddie what the Fuck happened to you.” Richie ran up to Eddie and Bev was the second to do so, followed by Bill, and the rest of the losers who didn't really want to get sick (Mike, Ben, and Stan) Eddie walked into the kitchen and all the other losers followed, he felt very overwhelmed. “Eddie are you okay..?” Ben asked “No dumbass he's not okay.” Stan replied “Shut the fuck up stan the man and Haystack!” “I think my little Eddie Spaghetti is trying to say something.” Richie said to the arguing boys. Eddie opened his mouth not sure what he was going to say he felt so overwhelmed, so many people around him and he was being fussed over, he didn't know what to do they were all looking at him. He shut his mouth, more stares, he just was so overwhelmed he felt a hot tear triple down his face, he didn't even want to see their reaction to that, he latched on to Richie hugging him, the smaller boy put his face into Richie’s chest, crying. Richie huge him back they just held onto each other for a second until Richie said “Whats wrong my little Edward Spaghedward?” Muffled nosies was Eddies reply until he said “I can't.” “You can't what Eds?” Richie was trying to be sincere, and he was succeeding, but he thought he had failed miserably when Eddie’s shoulders started to shake, now he was not only crying he was silently sobbing.  “Everyones looking at me..” Hiccup “I can't...” Hiccup “I don't feel good.” he hurried his head deeper into Richie’s chest at this. “Don't worry Eds They are gonna go finish the movie, right guys?” Without hesitation Mike, Stan, and Ben went to finish the movie Bill, whose big brother instincts had taken over wanted to stay but ultimately decided it was best to go finish the movie, not only because helping Eddie was not what Eddie wanted, but also because it made him think more about Gorgie, and he really didn't want to join the sobbing party. “Bev, are you um gonna leave now..?” Richie said trying his best not to sound like a complete jackass “I’m not leaving, you don't know how to make him feel better, because you don't know anything about taking care of sick people, Eddie knows the most about it but I do know quite a bit.” “I care about him, not in the same way you do but, he's my friend and I hate to see him suffer.” Beverly finished up her explanation “I now deem you Mom of the group.” Richie said hitting beverly on the head with his hand. “Yeah ok great whatever Richie shouldn't we be focusing on Eddie right now?” Beverly stated flatly. Eddie who still had his face buried in Richies chest had began to subside his sobs until his shoulders were no longer bouncing up and down like that jello you get at the fair. “I don't feel good.” Eddie said quietly his voice was so small and in pain it broke Richie’s heart. “I know Eddie your gonna be okay though.” Richie tried to be reassuring but it was not as much of a second nature for him as cussing or doing his voices was. “Rich, I’m gonna go see if Ben has a thermometer, I’m worried that Eddie has a fever he seems sort of...I don't know out of it I guess.” Richie looked confused.   “That can be caused by fevers.” She added. “Oh okay well you go then I’ll stay here with my little Edward Spaghedward.” He smiled. “Pfft like you have a choice.” She chuckled at her own comment which was followed by Richie’s laughter, she headed off to talk to Ben on the off chance he might know where his own thermometer was. I swear these boys are so unorganized, they don't even know where there own school things are much less things in their house! She thought, but ultimately decided to talk to Ben anyway.  Richie didn't know what to do he had a most likely fever induced, delirious Eddie hanging onto him for dear life, fucking crying into his chest! He loved his Eddie spaghetti with his whole heart and would do anything for him, its not that this situation was awkward, no no it was far from that, the issue was that Richie could hardly take care of himself, how could he make sure his sick little Eddie was well taken care of? He had no prior knowledge on sickness before he met Eddie, and even after knowing him for like forever he never actually listened to the things Eddie was saying! Oh why didn't he listen!? Part of him wished that Eddie had latched onto Beverly, Richie knew that she had taken some dumb babysitting course so that she could get some extra money for the movies, well it’s not like she had told him but he had seen the certificate on her wall. Beverly Marsh certificate of  achievement for completing the Red Cross babysitting course in Derry Maine. What a bunch of bullshit, nobody could tell you how to babysit you just like watched the baby right? Richie did not know much about babysitting, and he never had and never planned to babysit. Richies thoughts were interrupted by a small squeak. “You okay?” Richie asked, he had no fucking idea what would make a person squeak like actually squeak, and if it were a different senero Richie would have laughed and made one of his famous jokes about it, but this was not that senero, instead Richie was worried that he had perhaps hugged Eddie too tightly, or maybe that Eddie was in pain. “Stomach..” Eddie replied softly “Do you feel like your gonna throw up?” Richie asked while stroking Eddie’s hair gently “I-I-I uh I don't know.” Eddie was shutting his eyes tightly he could feel his stomach twisting and turning and it was really painful, he felt tears in his eyes, not only from the crying but new ones created by this ache. His throat burned, acidic bile trailed up, he pulled away from Richie. This was enough clue for Richie to know that Eddie was going to throw up, he quickly helped Eddie over to the sink, which wasn't necessarily the best place to throw up, but it was better than the ground right? Eddie just could not bring himself to empty the contents of his ever churning stomach, he just could not do it, Eddie did not like to look at vomit, nobody did, but just thinking about all the germs and bacteria that a person threw up was enough to bring him into a panic attack. He knew he would feel better if he threw up, well he knew but it didn't really register, what did register was the fact that he would have to open his eyes and see his own vomit all over the sink, which would so surely put him into a panic attack, he felt bad enough already that was most certainly not what he needed. “Richie I-I-I I can't..” “Your not gonna throw up then?” Richie said relived “I’m too scared to.. I just don't wanna open my eyes and see it there reeking with all those germs and bacteria, its just I can I mean do you even know how many germs live inside of vomit..” He gaged. Richie rubbed circles onto Eddie’s back “Just let it out your gonna feel so much better, you can close your eyes okay?” “Just let it out okay?” Eddie could not talk he was so concentrated on not vomiting. It burned his throat more to hold back the vomit then it did to actually just puke, but the logical side of his brain was all out of proportion right now. “Your gonna hurt yourself trying to not puke Eds, Just feel the circles I'm rubbing on your back?” “They are gonna help you to just let go, I’m going to count to three alright, three and when I get to three you just relax, stop making your body tense up, and just puke, then you can just close your eyes, I’m going to help you up and that will be it.” “No big deal.” Richie said. No big deal Eddie reaped to himself, no big deal. “Okay Ready Spaghetti?” “One......” Eddie tried to relax a little more feeling the circles being rubbed on his back. No big deal no big deal. “Two....” Eddie was almost fully relaxed but he was still holding the vomit in. “Three.” It burned in the back of his throat, his eyesight was blurred with the tears as all his lunch, and some stomach acid was brought up, he heard to splash, watery vomit splashed all over the sink, after a few minutes though, it was over. “Shh shh, that's it my little spaghetti man, your okay, your okay, no big deal right?” “Now just keep your eyes closed shut them super tight, Im going to help you get back up from this leaning position.” Eddie did as he was told, he couldn't bear to open his eyes anyways so it was pretty easy. Richie helped Eddie back up, and wiped his mouth with a paper towel. “Feel any better Eds?” Eddie was looking very pale, and he replied with “Sort of.” Richie knew Eddie well better than any of the other losers, so he knew that Eddie was about to start crying before it even happened. He pulled him into his chest and Eddie cried, he cried because he felt like shit, and because he was aware of the smell of his own vomit, although Eddie did not know it he was somewhat afraid of vomit. So that's another reason why he cried, he cried because he felt safe to cry, safe with Richie holding him, and safe enough to show his true emotions. Richie hugged the smaller boy until he stopped crying, Beverly walked back into the room, aware immediately of the smell, well it was kind of hard to miss, and bearing with her the thermometer. Eddie went to sit down in one of the chairs positioned around a small circular wooden table just to the left of the kitchen. “He threw up?” She asked very quietly praying to god Eddie couldn’t hear. “Yeah.” Richie replied. “Oh, poor thing he's gonna be okay though as soon as we found out the source of his problems, which is most likely a fever.” “by the way how did you get him to like actually throw up?” Eddie got sick a lot, and he was always with his friends so they had seen him sick before a lot, but never so....you know out of it. They knew that it took hours of pain where Eddie would just hold back the vomit, and when he finally would throw up, have a like severe panic attack. Eddie had emetophobia, although nether him or the losers had such a fancy name for it, they just said he was afraid of vomit, afraid of the word even. well that was only sometimes, one very very bad days where Eddie had come to school after being yelled at by his mom for not washing his hands before coming to school, or something crazy like that where she would scare him about all these diseases, they all had bad days though, and understood that on these bad days they had to take care of each other.  “Lets go see if he has a fever.” Beverly said. “Righto my good chap, lets go fix ‘im up good oh yes indeed, fix ‘im up old chap, lets see what in the good hell has gotten my small small SMALL spaghetti into such the funk.” Richie said doing his Toodles the butler voice. “Oh Richie....” Beverly said as they walked over to their small pale looking friend. “How are you feeling Eddie?” Beverly asked. “I don't feel good.” he said putting his head on the table. “Oh no call the doctor, call the nurse, call Eddie’s mom oh yeah I was meaning to do that anyways we had wicked se...” He was cut off by Bev’s “Beep Beep Richie.” “Oh yeah right beep beep hehe.”Richie replied “Here Eddie just put this in your mouth and when it beeps give it to me.” Beverly said in her best mom voice. “What the fuck no, do you know how many germs could be on that?” “so many plus, I don't know whose mouth that has been in.” Eddie replied replaced by the idea of putting that in his mouth. “Aha, I thought you might say something like that, which is why I got some probe covers, yes yes now you don't have to worry at all about germs.” Beverly replied. “See ol’ chap ye don't have to worry a tall about germs, not a tall!” Richie added in his toodles voice. “Germs are everywhere, no probe cover ca stop them...” “Okay come on Eddie that’s bullshit and you know it, I saw you use a thermometer with a probe cover just last week!” Bev exclaimed. “I just I don't want to se what it says ....” Eddie replied a bit sheepishly “What,what the fuck not?” Richie said. “If I have a fever then I have o feel like shit for longer, and if I don't then its like I was crying for no reason and I just feel like shit for no reason I don't want you guys to think im like you know overreacting.” Eddie answered. “Oh Eddie don't worry about that, we never think your overreacting, things can be painful, not just fevers.” Beverly said while pulling him into a hug. “thanks Bev.” He said. they took Eddie’s temperature and saw that it was a whopping 101 degrees (F) “Here Richie can you put some water on this cloth, we need to bring his fever down.” they both turned around at a sudden gag coming from the small ill boy. “Oh fuck, are you gonna throw up Eds?” Richie asked. “Richie!” Beverly said, can I talk to you for a minute? “Oh yeah sure, but umm Eddie he looks sorta...” “Just come over here.” She said interrupting him. “okay.” he walked over. ”what's up?” “We shouldn't say like you know throw up, vomit, puke, whatever you want to call it, because first of all he's already thrown up what little he's eaten today, and also its just going to make him upset, look at him.” Eddie was leaning over in his chair, arms crossed on the table, head buried in them, softly crying, he was breathing kind of funny too. “Shit.” Richie did not want to make his little Eddie cry, he loved him, he needed to think before he spoke, which was so fucking hard for a certain trashmouth. “just go put some water on this cloth, cold water, and then put it on his head okay?” Bev said a little annoyed with Richie, but knowing that Eddie would freak out if she asked him to sit down and finish the movie. “Yes sir thank you sir.” Richie did in one of his newer voices, Albert the solider. Richie walked over to the sink, and put some cold water on the cloth while Bev went to get some medicine to bring Eddie’s fever down. “How are you Eddie Spaghetti?” “feeling any better?” richie said white putting more water onto the rag. “Never better.” Eddie said in a slurred voice. “Here, this will help you feel better, bring down your fever.” Richie said hopping this trick of Bev’s would work. “K.” Eddie was obviously exhausted. Richie took the cloth, and rung it out over eddies head . “what the fuck was that?!” Eddie said, now soaking wet. “Its supposed to bring your fever down, don't ask me!” Richie replied. “You dumbass, I’m all wet now!” Eddie screamed furiously. “Funny, that's what your mom said last night too.” Richie said seizing the opportunity. Eddie did something that suprised Richie, he went back into his kowla bear state, hugging him like it was life or death. “Eddie, I’m so sorry, I know you feel like shit, I love you, I’m just trying to take good care of you best I know how.” “I know I'm shit at but I just want to be here for you, and make you feel better.” Richie said to the now crying little Eddie. “I love you too, Im not crying because you made me all wet, im crying because...” hiccup “because I really don't  feel good.” Eddie said softly into Richie’s chest.”Its okay Eddie we are gonna get you all. fixed up, I promise.” Richie said, Eddie was slowly falling asleep, he was just so tired, it had been a long day, so Eddie and Richie went to sit on the couch with all the other losers, well, minus Bev who was still getting the fever medicine. The losers where very concerned about Eddie, but he didn’t even have time to react, before he knew it Richie had pulled Eddie on top of him, where Eddie fell asleep, safe, and happy, a little wet, well soaking, but nothing a little towel, or time couldn’t fix. He was happy, and so was Richie.

Some side notes:

I made this at 3am, I really wanted to go to sleep so I just sort of ended it quickly. If you don't like the ending message me, and I MIGHT rewrite it, also message me if you have any requests. :D My favorite things to write are like anything with a venerable Eddie, and Richie taking care of him, usually I don't post the things I write, and usually Richie is very good at taking care of Eddie, but this is what my brain decided to do at 3am. Don't be too harsh, but constructive criticism is always welcome.

[angrylizardjacket]

the things we do for likes {Joe Mazzello/Reader/Ben Hardy}

Anon asked: lol ben and joe having instagram wars on who can post the most embarrassing content of reader

A/N: again, written on my phone because the writing demon possessed me at 2am. I'm probs gonna have this as a series akin to B/R/R, aka disconnected vignettes in the same universe. Lemme know if you wanna be tagged. A case of the mondays is a McElroy reference, before you ask. 😊😊

It starts when Joe wakes up to an empty bed and noises coming from the kitchen; noises being footsteps, a loud bang, and some half coherent swearing. There's silence for a moment, then the opening and closing of the fridge. As soon as he's got his wits about him and realises it's just you in the other room, he opens his phone.

"So I wake up to no girlfriend and noises in the kitchen," Joe says after a minute of searching through his closet for his baseball bat, ready to film a bit for his Instagram. As he makes his way to the kitchen now, he holds the bat in frame, "I'm ready to rescue her if it's robbers." He assured the camera, voice still quiet and rough with sleep. Once he gets to the kitchen, however, he stops dead at the sight before him. There's a very long couple of seconds where all that the camera catches is his surprise.

"Why do you have a bat?" Your voice is muffled, as if you're speaking around something, and that's when Joe seems to remember he's filming, he changes to his front facing camera and turns on his phone light, exposing the fact that you're sitting cross legged on the kitchen island, eating a banana with a carton of juice in your other hand. You hiss at the light, arm coming up to sheild your eyes. The light doesn't move, and after a beat you shift your arm so he can see your face scrunched up where you're squinting at him, clearly unhappy about this intrusion into your snacking time. You take another bite of banana.

"Why are you on the counter?" He breathes, a little flabbergasted, and you chew, looking down at where you're seated, as if it's only just occurred to you that it's not exactly a normal chair. After a beat, you shrug, and raise the juice carton to your lips taking a long swig. You were so focused, so deliberate, and so obviously tired and half asleep that Joe couldn't help but laugh.

"Seriously, why do you have a bat?" And you finished the banana and put the peel down beside you with far more delicacy than it reasonably warranted.

"I heard noises and you weren't there, so I thought I'd come protect you from robbers." He explained, moving forward until he was standing next to you by the counter. You gaze into the middle distance for a moment as you contemplated his words.

"I was the robbers." You say, nodding sagely as the realisation comes to you. As if to prove this point, you reach out blindly for the fruit bowl that you'd already accosted once, picking up a lime and trying to fit the whole thing in your mouth. The last thing the video catches is Joe lunging forward to pull the fruit from between your teeth with a surprised exclamation before the video cuts off.

It's there that he realises that you're not half asleep, you're completely asleep, and sleep-eating at that. You're compliant enough when he leads you back to bed, though you adamantly refuse to let go of the juice, and you sit it triumphantly on your bedside table before promptly falling back into bed. Despite everything, Joe can't help but be endeared as he settles in beside you.

The video goes up the following morning after he shows it to you for your approval.

@joemazzello @yourinstagramhandle: "I had a case of the Mondays!" Me: "What does that even mean?"

@benhardy1 there's so much to unpack here

@benhardy1 also @yourinstagramhandle caught red handed drinking straight from the carton

@joemazzello @benhardy1 listen it was a lot to take in but youre right @yourinstagramhandle there was a cup right beside you!!!

@gwilymlee what is happening over there??

@benhardy1 @gwilymlee i know, im gone for one week......

@yourinstagramhandle I HAD A CASE OF THE MONDAYS!! 😂😭 @benhardy1 @gwilymlee @joemazzello

@yourinstagramhandle dont bully me @benhardy1 i miss you x

@benhardy1 @yourinstagramhandle 😘😘

@joemazzello @yourinstagramhandle @benhardy1 gross (im kidding, come home)

@benhardy1 @joemazzello 🙄🖕 (😘)

It becomes a thing, much to your chagrin, 'a case of the Mondays' becomes a meme the moment Ben posts a video from set, of him walking into his trailer where you'd been waiting for him, only for him to find you laying on his sofa under a fluffy blanket, watching Netflix with a face mask on.

"You took too long, now I'm having me-time." You announced. In the background, the Friends theme song starts.

Ben captions the video 'when you're hit with a case of the mondays', and tags you.

Not fifteen minutes later, Joe responds with his own video posted to his Instagram story captioned 'are mondays contagious? asking for a friend'. The video seems to have been taken not long after Ben's since you're still in a facemask on his sofa in the trailer, the difference is that Ben's in a face mask, and you've got your feet in his lap. The video starts in the middle of a heated argument, and it takes a few moments for the two of you to realise Joe is there, filming. Ben's the first to reach out to him.

"Monica's the worst Friend, right? Back me up here." He asks, and before Joe can even think about answering, you groan loudly, rolling your eyes.

"Ross is obviously the worst Friend, are you kidding me? He's manipulative, he's mean, he's-" you start, carefully extracting yourself from beneath the blanket as you spoke, peeling off your face mask.

"He's a terrible boyfriend and brother, yeah, but he's not the worst Friend," Ben elaborates, following behind you, and Joe quickly takes your spot on the sofa while you're in the bathroom. The argument continues as you wrinse your faces, you taking it in stride easily when you realise your seat's been usurped, sitting yourself in Joe's lap while Ben takes back his original seat. Finally the two of you look to Joe who had been waiting for this moment. The Friends laugh track goes off in the background.

"Well, you're both wrong; the worst Friend is Phoebe." He announced very matter of factly, like it's something he's been sure of for a while. After a beat, both you and Ben groan in unison, you even going so far as to move from Joe's lap to Ben's. That's where the video stops.

You update your Instagram story not long after with a picture of Joe in a face mask, grinning like an absolute fool, captioned 'we got him'.

There's more videos, more pictures, all showcasing you in the worst lighting or weird situations, and all of which you approve before they're posted, despite how embarrassing some of them may seem. Despite all of this, you don't care; it's posted because you're comfortable enough to share yourself with them, even in less than flattering situations, and when you look up, their gaze meeting yours where they're grinning behind their cameras, you can see in their eyes the fondness, the 'yeah, this is the fool I love'.

Ben posts a candid video of you recreating the Risky Business sock-slide scene when the song comes on your Spotify while folding the laundry. The moment you spot him, he stops filming however, because he sees the mischief in your eyes, and the way your hips are moving as you step towards him; you're feeling silly and sexy, climbing into his lap on the sofa, still dancing, though it's more grinding now, and singing the half remembered words. That's not for the rest of the world to see.

Joe posts a series of photos chronicling you forgetting to use an oven mitt to check on the frozen pizza you'd chucked in the oven, and even goes so far as to draw a red circle around the mitt that was literally sitting on the counter beside the oven as you sulked in the foreground of the final photo, holding a bag of frozen peas to your hand. He doesn't post about how he sits you down in front of the TV and brings you a proper ice pack, how he finishes getting dinner all ready and how he and Ben spend the rest of the night doting on you as much as they gently tease you.

They post dumb, nonsense arguments, but not sleepy morning kisses; your reaction to trying food that's way too spicy, even for you, but not how you smile so sweetly over desserts; the way you nap in the weirdest places, bit not how cute you look when you fall asleep on one of them. That's by design. From the outside the relationship is fun and chaotic and bright, but you don't owe the world a confirmation of just how much you love these men. But honestly, the world seems to understand, and somehow that doesn't make you uncomfortable. Though even the small snippets the three of you have shared, it's clear you love and trust each other.

And it comes out in other ways too, other cast members, not that you really mind.

"Tell us about Ben, Joe, and Y/N, are they actually sappy on set?" Gwilym reads out a question during an Instagram live session he's hosting in his trailer to kill time between scenes. "Listen, I'll tell you what, they're worse on set," he tells his audience with playfully annoyed expression, getting up. "Joe's trailer is right next to mine and if I check-" leaving his own trailer he takes his phone with him, knocking on the one next door as the comments of his live show go absolutely nuts, "I bet all three of them are in there." He mused.

Joe opens the door, yawning and rubbing his eyes, clearly having just woken up. "Keep it down, man," Joe mumbles before he sees the phone in Gwil's hand.

"Sorry I woke you, say hello to Instagram, Joe." Joe grins, giving a wave when Gwil holds up the phone. "They were asking about you three," he knows without having to ask that you and Ben are with him. Whenever you came to visit the set the three of you stuck pretty close together.

"They're still asleep," Joe steps aside to allow Gwil to peak inside. As promised, you and Ben were draped over each other on the sofa, though your feet have clearly been moved where Joe had to extract himself to answer the door. The UK Office is playing on someone's laptop. You yawn in your sleep and nestle in against Ben further, even Gwil's heart melts a bit at that.

"Alright, sorry to wake you," Gwil smiles and retreats as Joe stifles a yawn and assures him it's no trouble at all. When he's back in his own trailer, Gwil takes a breather before going back to looking at his live stream.

"They're cute, it's disgusting at times, how cute they are, and yeah, no, they don't show a lot of that in public, but they do really care about each other." He paused, shrugging, "and sometimes they're just weird. I saw Joe dare Ben to try and eat a whole apple in one bite, and he tried, and Joe video called Y/N when it got stuck, but it turns ou her solution was for her to eat a whole apple in one go too, to see how to get out of it; it just got stuck. They all seemed surprised by this, and it was just one of those times where I was like 'ah, yes these people make sense together', you know?" He shrugged, grinning as he read a few comments, "yeah it really did feel like they all got hit with a case of the mondays."

Taglist: @cosmicsskies

shoot me a message and I'll add you xx

[onceuponadetectivedemigod]

hmm well i don’t wanna bother you but maybe you could do two endings to the fic? one very angsty and one smutty (like threesome). The fic could start angsty too

Drunken Mistake

Smutty ending

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader, Tigerlily Taylor x Reader, Ben Hardy x Tigerlily Taylor x Reader.

Warnings: Smut, cheating, serious LANGUAGE, alcohol,

An: HOLY SHIT I HAVE SINNED. im probably going to hell for this one. This is probably the best smut I’ve written so far and it is steamy. sorry this took so long but here it is. Life just keeps throwing shit my way every time I’m like “yeah” so you know. ALSO I DONT CONDONE CHEATING. And WOW THIS IS LIKE my dream fantasy but I still don’t think cheating is the way to go about that. (Also sidenote im inexperience so some of this may not be accurate therefore I’m sorry)

Ben walked in the door. You were sitting on the couch ready to confess your drunken mistake from the night before. He set down his gym bag and came over and kissed your cheek.

“Hey babe. I’m gonna get in the shower. Then you can tell me all about girls night.” He smiled. God his smile made you melt. Which made you feel more guilty.

“Ben we need to talk. Now.”

“What’s wrong?” His face grew concerned. He looked at you and sat down on the couch. Tears started streaming down your face.

“Ben...”

“Y/N? What’s wrong?” He sounded more adamant.

“Me and Tigerlily went out last night and got shitfaced right?”

“Yeah so? You didn’t bring home another guy did you?” He half joked but you could tell he was slightly serious based on his breathing. His breathing became shaky, he isn’t quite sure what will happen next.

“No. But I told you last night I was gonna stay at her place cause I didn’t want to drive or risk taking an Uber alone. Well when we got back to her place we decided to watch Netflix. But her only tv is in her room so we cuddled up on her bed. And next thing I knew... Ben, I fucked her. I fucked Tigerlily. I cheated. I feel so horrible. God. I don’t even know what happened. I am so sorry Ben. I understand if you don’t trust me anymore or if you want me gone-“

“Who said anything about you leaving?” Ben looked at you. You were balling your eyes out and you couldn’t read his expressions.

“Ben I cheated on you! Why wouldn’t you want me gone?” You said wiping your tears.

“Y/N... listen, yeah I’m hurt. But if I’m being quite honest with you I still trust you, I mean it was with your friend, someone I know, you had the decency to tell me first thing, it’s not like you picked up some random chick or dude from the club. It’s not someone you’ve been fucking behind my back. Also you were drunk. Honestly Y/N the thought of you and Tigerlily fucking kinda gives me a boner.” His voice was calm and collected the entire time he spoke. You gathered your thoughts and tried to grasp everything he had said. When you finally spoke again, the tension subsided.

“So if I were to invite her over right now..?” He laughed.

“Well right now you kinda look like shit. Maybe once you get yourself together?” He laughed.

“Fuck you.” You shouted and playfully hit his arm.

“But having two girls at once is like a fantasy of mine and I can’t even begin to tell you how horny that makes me feel right now.” His eyes darkened as they set on you. “But I bet I can show you a helluva better time than she can.”

“Oh really? Prove it.”

And he did.

You made arrangements for the three of you. You explained the situation to Tigerlily. Although she felt just as guilty as you did. But she said she’d be happy to oblige with ben’s fantasy. And you’d definitely be lying if you didn’t think about it every day until the next Friday.

“You two get started. I’m just gonna sit over here for a minute. Also remember: safeword is pineapple.” Ben said as he sat in the chair across from the bed, where you and Tigerlily both sat in nice new lingerie.

“Well maybe you could tell us what to do? It’s your fantasy and I don’t remember much of what happened last time?” Tigerlily spoke up.

“You know if you’re going to sass me all night it might just get you in trouble.” He replied.

“Oh I count on it. But still.” She said.

“Why don’t you try making out? Foreplay it.” He recommended.

“Who you want on top?” She asked.

“I don’t give a fuck. Just do something!”

“Ben baby. It’s alright don’t get pissed off, we just want to do this in a way that will please you.” You piped in. But instead of letting him answer you immediately attacked Tigerlily’s face with your own. You climbed on top of her and started viscously making out. Her hands found your hips. She let her hands slide down to your ass and gave your bum a little squeeze.

You moved you lips from her mouth to her neck and collar bone. She moaned and moved her head back to give you more access. Her hands started to wander and feel around your body. You started sucking hickeys on her neck as one of your hands found her boobs and your legs became entangled.

You heard Ben mutter a low “fuck.” And you were almost sure he had started working his cock.

You started moving your lips farther down her body and found her other boob. And decided to move your hand down, rubbing her leg and low abdomen. Her back arched toward your mouth and her hand found its way into your hair. You snapped off her bra with your other hand and helped her out of it, throwing it on the floor next to Ben. She moved to do the same to yours.

Now you were absolutely sure that he was working his cock as you could here his moans becoming more audible.

You started kissing lower and lower until you got to her underwear that had become visibly wet, but so had yours. You moved her panties down her legs as you quickly licked a stripe up her wet core. Her hands had found their way back into your hair.

Suddenly Ben shouted for you to stop.

“Y/N hop off.” You did as you were told.

“Tigerlily go over to the edge of the bed.” He pointed standing up. She let her legs fall off the bed granting you easier access. She sat up. He was already naked from jerking off before. He walked over to her and hovered over her. He stroked her cheek. “Suck my dick.” Was the order he gave her. And you knew that he was about to face fuck the shit out of her for talking back to him earlier. Yet you still felt a slight tinge of jealousy. She leaned back on her hands as his fists found clumps of her hair. She put her mouth around his cock and started working on it, but he immediately took charge. He looked at you.

“Finish what you started.”

“Yes sir.” This made him groan. He loved it when you called him sir. And frankly you loved the way it affected him.

You went to the edge of the bed and started eating her out. Making sure to completely encompass her clit. Ben started fucking her face faster and faster. She was moaning so much at the sensation of both of you. Suddenly you could tell she was reaching her high as well as him. You were jealous of not getting any friction as they were. When she finally came in your mouth, you did your best to clean up every bit of it. Ben would like that.

When Ben finally came in her mouth, she fell back on the bed and he rolled over next to her.

They were both breathing incredibly hard and despite fear of punishment you really just wanted to cum. You straddled ben’s thigh and started riding.

“Ben baby. I’ve been good. Can you please make me come?”

“Fuck baby. Take off your underwear.” You stood up and did as you were told. “I will take care of you. As for you...” he looked over at Tigerlily. Go sit in the chair and finger yourself. She did as was told. Every now and then you would top Ben, but tonight was all for him and his dominance was definitely showing. He laid his head and back against the head board. “Come ride me.”

You went over to him and sunk onto his cock. And started to ride. His hands found your ass and his lips found your tits. You started chasing your own high and it would have been long before you’d come.

“You see this Tigerlily, don’t ever fuck her without my permission again. This cunt is mine. I want you to know I will always fuck her better than you.” His words rang through your ears and turned you on more.

“C’mon baby. Come on my cock.” He whispered in your ear, pulling you closer to him to hit just a little deeper and reach your g spot. He guided your hips for you.

Suddenly you were seeing stars but he helped you ride out your high as come started spilling out of you onto him.

“Good girl. You did great baby.” He said encouragingly. “Tigerlily you can stop. Go take a shower. We set up the guest bedroom for you.”

She gave an awkward goodnight as she left the room. You had finally come down from your high as you rolled over next to Ben. He got up and went to the bathroom to bring you a wet rag to clean you up with. Once you two had actually gotten in bed, he leaned over and kissed you on the forehead as you entangled in each other’s arms.

“That was a lot of fun.” He spoke up. “But please don’t cheat on me again.”

“Never. But I’m not opposed to that ever again.”

Ben taglist: @sevenseasofrog

[descendantofthesparrow]

Encore - Part of your World - Harry Hook x Reader - part 18 - quiet

suuuch a fluffy chapter lol 

=

You slowly woke up as beams of sunlight hit your face, you cracked open your yees and groaned, sitting up slightly to avoid the sun.

You yawned and rubbed your eyes, smacking your lips together and dropping your hands on the sheets covering your legs.

Glancing at the clock you sighed.

7:37 am.

You hated waking up early on your days off, but you were still exhausted from the night before so you hopped out of bed, closed the shades to the window, and walked back over to your bed. flopping back down into the mattress and curling up underneath the sheets, turning your back to the window.

You fell back to sleep, face buried into Harry's pillow.

Harry stepped into the room minutes later, taking off his hat and tossing it onto the chair in the corner of the room.

He sighed, shaking his head and running his head through his sweat-soaked hair.

He was glad Uma had enchanted the lost revenge 2.0 with a constant temperature of 70°, so no matter how hot it was outside the ship, it was always comfortable.

A smile broke out on Harry's face as he spotted your sleeping form on the bed, the blankets curled around your form. He took tentative steps towards the bed and leaned over you, pressing a kiss to your exposed forehead.

He stood up straight and walked over to the bathroom, stripping out of his sweat-soaked clothes and tossed them into the hamper.

You woke up to the sound of the shower and sat up, blearily looking around the room.

You noticed Harry's shirt hanging halfway out of the hamper and his boots just outside of the bathroom door.

‘Harrys back from dock work’ you thought, stretching your arms, groaning as your back popped and hopped out of bed, walking over to your dresser and getting out some clothes for the day.

You stopped as the light from the reopened window hit your new ring, the ruby shining in your face. You smiled and brought your hand close to your face, biting your lip as you remembered Harry's sweet proposal.

Deciding to dress comfortably for the day, you grabbed one of Harry's tank tops and a pair of black leggings.

You tossed them on the bed and opened the top drawer, digging out a red sports bra and some socks, tossing those on the bed.

Mentally deciding on your black converse you turned and walked over to the bathroom, knocking on the door.

“come in!” Harrys muffled voice echoed back. You opened the door and stepped in, closing it behind you. “hi love” Harry purred, poking his head out from behind the shower curtain.

“hi~” you chirped, tiptoeing over to him and pressing a kiss to his lips “you’re wet”

“im takin’ a shower” Harry chuckled, slicking his long bangs back and shaking his head at you. He dipped back behind the curtain and continued to wash his hair.

You turned to the sink and did your morning routine.

A couple of minutes later the shower stopped, harry stepping out of the shower, and standing behind you, he leaned over you and kissed your cheek, giggling as you squeaked and smacked his shoulder.

He backed up and grabbed a towel drying off his hair before wrapping it around his waist. “thought yeh were gonna sleep in?” Harry asked, raising his brow at you as you tried to talk with toothpaste in your mouth.

“ughgh” you spit the paste out into the sink, turning to pout at Harry. “you woke me up”

“aw im sorry love” Harry chuckled, walking out of the bathroom and over to your shared dresser. As he got his clothes out you finished your routine, patting your face with a towel and walking out of the bathroom, a smirk growing on your lips as you passed by Harry who was leaning over the dresser.

*SMACK*

Harry stood straight, a small yelp ripping from his lips as he spun around, his cheeks a blazing red “(y/n)!!” he yelled, mouth gaping open in shock as he watched you giggle to yourself.

“i-im sorry!” you looked back at him, scrunching your nose “I couldn’t resist~ you just got too good of a butt to not smack it!”

Harry pouted at you and shook his head, turning back to his dresser and grabbed the rest of his clothes for the day.

You bit your lip as he dropped his towel and pulled out a pair of boxer-briefs, covering up that sculpted butt of his “yer staring” Harry chuckled, glancing at you from the corner of his eye, his now too long bangs hanging over his eyes.

“im your fiancée” you snorted, rolling your ryes “I have a right to stare at your butt and you need a hair cut, hey that rhymed!” Harry blew his bangs out of his eyes and sighed.

“aye right,” he muttered, turning to you and walking over to the bed, setting his clothes next to yours. “ so what's the plan fer today?” Harry asked, shrugging on a tight white t-shirt, accenting his biceps.

“well, you already filled your quota for today for Uma and it's my day off, soooooo…..date day?”

“date day” Harry confirmed, leaning over and pecking your cheek, hopping into his pants and sitting down next to you to get his socks and shoes on.

Harry tied off his shoes and turned to you, raising his brow as he looked at your still pajama-wearing self “uh, yeh gonna get dressed?”

You perked up, looking down at your clothes “oh, I was just going to go like this? Problem?”

Harry chuckled and shook his head “well I wouldn’t have a problem” he eyed your exposed thighs “buuuut-“

“Alright alright,” you snorted, pushing his face away, breaking his eye contact with you “im getting dressed.”

=

Harry swung your hands between the two of you as you walked the path of the enchanted forest, his other hand holding his chocolate shake.

The two of you decided on a simple date for the day, get breakfast, hang out at the lost revenge watching movies, get lunch, go to the enchanted lake through the forest and just chill watching videos on your phone.

To you, it was perfect, just spending a day with the love of your life.

You finished off your shake as you arrived at the lake, you released Harry's hand and skipped down into the grotto, hearing Harry chuckle behind you as he followed.

Harry set down the fast-food bag on the ground, settling down next to it and pulling off his backpack, he took out a root beer and (fav soda/drink) and set them down next to the bag.

He watched you as you took off your shoes, rolled up your leggings, and wadded into the water, starting to dig around the rocks.

“yee” you grinned, standing up with a nice shiny black and clear crystal rock “I think it's obsidian and quarts!” Harry tilted his head at you as you wadded towards the grotto “yeh sure?”

“I said I think, not that it is” you snarked, lifting yourself onto the grotto platform and shaking your legs to rid of the excess water “you sure you got your hearing ears on?”

“ouch” Harry snorted, grabbing the food bag and clutching his chest “no food fer yeh then”

“bitch I paid for it! give me my food!” you dropped to your knees next to harry, reaching for the bag as he cackled and leaned away from you, lifting the bag in the air.

“no~” he sang, yelping as you lifted your leg and placed your knee in his hip, halfway straddling him and grabbing the bag “hey!” you mocked his laugh and kissed him on the nose, turning around and sitting on his thigh.

Harry let out a small huff and buried his face in the crook of your neck, watching as you took out the food from the bag.

You set down Harry's burger and took out your (preferred fast food item) and started to eat, rearranging yourself to let Harry eat.

It was quiet as you ate and listened to the music coming from Harry’s phone and the waterfall in the distance.

You finished your food and crumbled the wrapper and tossed it in the bag, sipping at your drink as you leaned back against Harry.

“so,” Harry started, licking his lips “when’s an appropriate time ta talk ‘bout weddin’ stuff?”

“anytime really” you muttered, closing your eyes and resting your head on Harry's shoulder.

“soooo” Harry hummed, letting his cheek rest against your head “um, cake?”

“my aunts already on it” you chuckled “she offered to do it free of charge but I said we would pay her”

“of course” Harry smirked “she's a damn good baker, can't let her efforts going unpaid”

“Yep yep” you laughed “Evie offered to make my dress, and im gonna let her do that but im designing it mainly” you muttered with a slight tone of nonchalance.

“Is this about those Mal and Ben wedding stuff from yer world?” Harry asked, glancing down at you.

“yeah” you groaned “those designs were not Disneys best, nor were they Evie’s, so im designing and Evies making”

Harry nodded, grabbing his root beer and taking a sip “um, is she also-“ “yeah” you interrupted, glancing up at harry “shes also making yours”

“alright that takes care of tha’” Harry muttered, “where?”

“mmmm” you went deep in thought, tapping your chin “well we could to a beach wedding, a forest wedding, a classic cathedral wedding, we could get married on the revenge, anywhere really, im not picky as long as I get to marry you” Harry felt his face flush and he buried his burning face into your neck. “fuuuck I love yeh” he muttered, feeling your hand reach up and run through his hair.

“I love you too harry” you giggled, tuning and kissing his forehead. You relaxed back against him and closed your eyes, smiling as you felt harry grab your left hand and start to mess with your fingers and ring.

“still hard ta believe that this is all real” he muttered, you snorted.

“consider what it's like for me, im from a world where yall are fictional characters, how do I know this isn’t my dream” you hummed, squeaking as harry wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into further into his lap.

“if it was I would scavenge the multiverse to find you” he muttered in your ear.

You felt tears burn at your eyes and you hurriedly wiped your eyes “gosh your such a sap” you sniffed, turning in his lap and pressing your lips to his.

Harry hummed into the kiss and tilted his head, hands trailing up your back and landing on your jaw, thumb brushing your cheek.

You groaned into the kiss as your phone suddenly went off, you leaned out of the kiss and almost fell out of Harry's lap reaching for your phone, if not for Harry's arms falling to your waist to hold you.

You picked up the phone and rose your brow at the id.

-AUNTIE

You pressed the answer button and set it on speakerphone.

“Hey what's up,” you said aloud, leaning back into Harry and tucking under his chin

‘hi hon, just a quick question, and I was busy so that’s why I didn’t just text you, im making some test batches for your cake and I was wondering what your favorite flavors are?’

“Ummm” you glanced up at Harry who nodded at his almost empty shake “harry likes chocolate, you know what I like, ummmm, maybe something light too? Like angel food?”

‘oooh~ angel food, okay thanks hon!’

“bye” you clicked off your phone as the dial tone sounded and set it back down on the ground. You leaned back and rose your brow as harry stared at you “you good?”

“mmhm” he hummed, bumping his forehead into yours and closing his eyes. You smiled at him, closing your eyes and once more relaxed against him.

It was a quiet date, just leaning against each other and watching videos as you spent the next two hours at the enchanted lake.

Around 3 pm you both decided to pack up and head back to the ship, Harry picking up his backpack and slinging it over his shoulder, tossing his arm over your shoulder, and walking out of the grotto with you.

“that was nice” you hummed, tossing the black and clear crystal rock in your hands “we should do that more often”

“aye,” Harry nodded, messing with his phone and pocketing it as music started to play. “I have next Tuesday off?”

“same here, then its set, day date next Tuesday!” you cheered, grabbing Harry's hand and swinging it in the air.

Harry chuckled and smiled at you, holding onto your hand and bringing it to his lips. “I can't wait ta be yers”

Your face burned and you let out a nervous snicker, sidestepping into Harry's side and rubbing your cheek into his arm “same”

“same?” Harry laughed, scrunching his nose “that’s all yeh have to say? Same?”

“shhhhhuuut up” you rolled your eyes, pushing away from him and upturning your nose “if you’re gonna make fun of me you can walk on your own” you speed-walked to make some distance.

“noooo” Harry pouted, running after you, a smile breaking on his face as you started to run. “hey!”

You cackled as you ran, “race you back to the ship!” “yer on!”

-end of part 18-

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