#but the other third years could probably mention that she got so closed-off after the Clash

[of-stars-and-fireflies]

The way Ruby's relationships are with her boys and what her stigma is is so bittersweet, but I also love the way it plays out for them tbh.

Ruby's stigma is to draw the attention of a crowd. Activated with "Valu" (I think, still debating), that is technically the only use of this ability, plus its inverse. If a crowd is already looking at her, she can use it to draw their attention in the exact opposite direction, though that can be disorienting for whoever is affected. She claims this is a useless ability, but uses it whenever necessary, mission or not.

If you can unlock her background lore (joking obviously), she'd mention that she doesn't get along with her family, as she's the "black sheep" amongst them, and hasn't even spoken to her brother for years. She'd also make the passive comment that her family might be glad to have Ruby somewhere away from them. This would probably be following her mention that Yuri seems to care about family a lot, and she respects it but doesn't really understand it herself.

Another thing she'll bring up is her "ghost" status. She can be standing next to her Mortkranken boys, but somehow people will overlook her. People bump into her sometimes or pass her by/cut her in lines/etc. as if they don't realize she's there. She passively thinks that it's been that way for her since before becoming a ghoul, but she truly doesn't know if that's a side-effect, or a side-effect that intensified an existing problem, or what.

Some of the other third years may mention that Ruby wasn't always emo- quite as antisocial and disinterested, and was pluckier when they were first years.

So in comes this plucky first year Mortkranken student, whose ability is to catch people's attention. Or, otherwise, to get rid of it when it's unwanted.

But at some point, Ruby starts losing interest in her work. She doesn't have quite the passion that Yuri has when he comes along, so she eventually hands the reins over to him after a long fight with the faculty about it.

Now, while she was still Captain, she was pretty strick with him. She denied him a lot of things, which upset him greatly, but she eventually learned to have some leeway and meet him halfway on things. But after handing him the title, she watched him go overboard but still wanted to leave anyways.

But she didn't. Because despite the incredible ego, there was something in him all too familiar—that desperate desire for recognition. To have everyone feast their eyes on her scientific prowess, to be seen for what she can do, and not scorned for what people enjoy believing for their own amusement or satisfaction.

So she stayed, albeit somewhat regretfully, to keep an eye on him and help him get what he wanted. Of course, she has Jiro to help keep him under control, and she plans to help Jiro out wherever possible as well, detached from the two as she may seem.

Ruby has since moved on from her aspirations of being recognized. Now she's in a sort of self-discovery journey to figure out what she wants in life and to give her the self-recognition she never allowed herself in her pursuit of validation outside of herself. But in her place is now someone who she doesn't want to suffer the same way she has all these years, and has even more behind his intentions than simply validation.

[ldrfanatic]

r2 mattheo riddle

the truth from my red lips

mattheo riddle x gryff!potter!reader

r2 - “you and me would be a BIG conversation”

taylor swift lyric prompts

slytherin boys works

“y/n!” you turned at the sound of your name. colin creevy, a second year, was running up to you with the two issues of the daily prophet. on the first was a picture of your cousin, harry potter, bloodied and stunned following his win at the triwizard tournament. the front of the second sported another stunned headshot of him at his trial for underage magic in the presence of a muggle. (dudley, the disgusting boy on your the other side of the family).

with the new school year it was all anyone could talk about. well that, and that he and dumbledore had both gone mad spouting “nonsense” that voldemort had returned. especially since the lovely minister of magic cornelius fudge was vehemently denying it.

the boy brandished the papers in front of you once more.

“can you have harry sign these?”

suddenly, you were reminded of why you’d never ever wish to be as famous as harry. sure people recognized your last name here and there, but most people hadn’t even known that james potter had a brother, let alone that that brother had children. your father cut all ties with the rest of the family after an unfortunate fallout with your grandfather.

it wasn’t until you came to hogwarts and were sorted into the same house that you and harry got the chance to connect. now that your parents had passed, you lived with your mothers best friend. she was the closest thing that you had to family until you found harry.

in any case, with no prior mention of you, potter was a common enough surname that no one outside of your friends suspected that you were related.

that was until rita skeeter at the bloody prophet decided to do some digging and out you in her mission to completely expose the boy who lived during last years tournament.

before you could respond, a deep voice sounded behind you. “bugger off!”

the boy shrugged, undeterred, and took off in the direction of a familiar head of curls down the hall. you said a silent prayer for hermione. you turned around with the intention of thanking your savior but the words died in your throat when you took note of who it was.

brown eyes met yours and a smile broke out over a scarred face.

“riddle.”

“potter.”

unlike yours, mattheo’s voice held no malice. you recognized the playful glint in his eyes.

mattheo riddle had been chasing after you since third year. you’d think that the boy would have let up by now considering your cousin and his father were sworn enemies.

still, you were probably one a few people to take note the way that mattheo flinched when his father was mentioned. and in a rare moment of softness, he’d even shared with you that he’d run away from home to live with theodore after his father lashed out at him once, causing the scar that stretched from the center of his forehead to his jaw.

it wasn’t exactly surprising to you that tom riddle wasn’t father of the year.

yet mattheo had proved to be a pretty good guard dog. you felt yourself snort at the pun, completely intended given the boys animagus. all things considered, he’d saved you from bloodsucking fame-fuckers more than once. so, pushing your feelings aside, you offered him a smile. you weren’t ashamed to say it was probably the first time you’d ever smiled at him.

“thanks.”

you stuck around long enough to see your theory proven correct as shock started to take over mattheo’s face. the boy stared at you, jaw opening and closing like a fish out of water for a couple of minutes.

you turned on your heel and waved over your shoulder at him, wishing you could watch his awe forever but having to make your way to potions.

-

what you’d apparently failed to realize is that this year, the gryffindors had potions with the slytherins. you’d found your spot next to hermione and whispered to her while you waited for class to begin.

a familiar mop of curls waltzed into the room. mattheo had a rather smug look on his face that was admittedly unnerving. he approached snape at his desk and whispered indistinctly to him. suddenly, snape stood from his desk.

“potter!”

harry stood from his seat and stared expectantly, no doubt wondering what he’d done this time.

“not you…”

snape’s words caused your heart to jump into your throat. fuck. a large hand swept in your direction, confirming your fears. he fixed you with an intense stare and then motioned to the empty seat next to a grinning mattheo.

you bit back a groan, knowing the indignation would do little but land you in detention. hermione flashed you a pitied look as you gathered your books.

once you’d plopped yourself down next to mattheo, he grabbed the leg of your stool under the table and slid your chair closer to his until his knee touched yours and the smell of his cologne wafted in the air. evil prick aside, he smelled rather nice.

“today we’re brewing the invigoration draught. I doubt that any of you will do it successfully…”

snape’s gravelly tone continued in the background while you tried desperately to focus on anything besides mattheo’s cologne. finally, he seemed content on his berating of the students and released you to gather your ingredients.

you flipped the book open to page 16, brow furrowed. you had every intention of passing your o.w.l.s this year. yet, if mattheo’s current behavior was any indication, it was going to be a stupid long year for you.

out of the corner of your eye, you caught mattheo staring at you. his chin rested on his palm, elbow on the table. you turned to him with the intent of deterring him, but he matched your stare with a sharp grin. trying to ignore the flipping in your stomach, you scratched down the list on a piece of parchment and made for the ingredient cupboard.

ailhosty leaves… dried billywig stings… peppermint… stewed mandrake… infusion of wormwood… honeywater…vervain infusion… scurvy grass…

as you looked at the ingredients in your hand, you were certain you’d forgotten something. the longer you stared, however, the more your memory seemed to fail you.

a shadow was cast in front of you. you felt the feel of a broad chest against your bad and the now familiar scent of mattheo filled your senses. a large hand reached up, grasping a jar from the top shelf. he held the jar out to you, chest still pressed against you and voice deep but oddly soft as he spoke.

“lovage leaves.”

earlier confidence now evaporated, you slipped out of his embrace and scurried back to your seat where you began to mix the first ingredients of the potion.

mattheo’s cockiness had now also disappeared and he was staring at you with a notably intense look on his face.

“you’re staring, riddle.”

“go out with me, y/n.”

you tried not to show how much the use of your first name affected you. it took you a moment to answer, and part of you had to silently applaud mattheo’s patience.

“you and me would be a big conversation.”

“so? let them talk. they’ll see what happens. when have I ever not protected you?”

you shot an annoyed look at him.

“what like I owe you?”

“no! that’s not what I— y/n look at me.”

mattheo’s hand wrapped around your wrist which was currently stirring a budding invigoration draught.

“that’s not at all what I meant. you don’t owe me anything. I just meant that I’ve never done anything to hurt you and I’ve never let anyone else hurt you either.” he took a breath and continued. “seriously. you hold me to this earth, you hold me down and I’ll protect you with my life.”

it was hard for you to care about what people thought by this point. after so many years of cat and mouse, you were the only person who knew mattheo like you did.

“one date, mattheo riddle. one.”

—

< mattheo taglist >

comment to be added!

06.14.2024

[silencesscreams]

𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐩𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞

james potter x reader

“inescapable, im not even gonna try, and if i get burned, at least we were electrified.”

a/n: maybe (just maybe) this was inspired by dress - taylor swift 🫡 also, ive had this in mind for AGES now, pls tell me about any grammar mistakes, english isn’t my first language!! also, i made up some characters just to have something to fit into the story pls dont mind that

warnings and tags: afab!reader, angstyish if you squint, uncomfortableness??, oh my god the tension, intimate and touchy relationship between friends, james mentions other girls blablabla, kissing, stitches, open wounds, falling, body shots, hickies, slighttt choking, oral sex (f receiving), praise, degradation???????? penetration, unprotected, v soft ending, use of y/n a couple of times, slow burn?? words words words. (god how i love james potter). james is a player !! r is in the marauders group, r is v close with lily, like two years after finishing hogwarts, marauders working together on the orderrrr

it started on your third year.

you were seated with a redhead named lily in potions, she was sweet. she was friends with boys mostly, so when you started getting close she was happy to have you as a friend.

on your first trip to hogsmeade, she came a long with you and brought four boys along with her; remus, sirius, peter and james.

james potter caught your eye as soon as you saw him for the first time, he was laughing to something sirius had said, and you swore that was the sweetest sound you had ever heard.

you bonded over the same taste in candy at honeydukes, music, books and enjoying the same sorts of jokes. not much longer, you could consider him one of your best friends.

after a while, you found out james was touchy, at least he was with you. he would play with your hands when he was bored, cracking your knuckles for you.

he’d always listen about all the gossip and talk shit on mutually hated people. lily was happy you got along, and most of her girl friends and guy friends were also your friends now, which made you incredibly happy to have found yourself in a group like that. you were happy about how a great friend james was, he was so nice to you.

well, until your sixth year. that was when james started getting girls, suddenly, over the summer, everyone started to drool over him. at first, it didn’t even bother you that much, sure, you bawled your eyes out when he skipped your usual outing in hogsmeade to go on some stupid date with some stupid girl, but it didn’t even bother you that much, did it? you dont know, but it started really to bother you at some point, sure, no one else was caring about it like you were, but maybe no one else was around him like you were. maybe no one else knew him like you did, at some points you even asked yourself if you really knew him after all those years. you even spent christmas with him once, how could you not know him? maybe you only knew what he wanted you to see. god, you hated this feeling.

around october it was really pissing you off. he barely hung out with you anymore, of course you always saw him in groups, but you liked being alone with him listening to music or doing nothing at all. james was sweet to be around. he was caring, and you liked his smell. the way his arm would always be around your shoulder.

but in november, what really pushed you over the edge, was him showing up to dinner with his neck filled with hickeys, really showing them off. he sat down next to you, as sirius and remus both eyed him, pretending they weren’t seeing shit, but they would probably joke around about it when you and the girls weren’t around. and that was it for you. you got up, got your books and left, you couldn’t stand to do this on that day. not when your clothes didn’t sit right, not when you didn’t feel clean, not when your hair was not staying how you wanted it to stay. not when you figured out you might be in love with your best friend.

“where you going?” james asked as soon as you got up, you ignored him and just started walking. your eyes just might’ve started to water and god you needed to go somewhere you could be alone.

so you found yourself in the library, sat next to the window, thinking about how you were going to explain storming off like that to your friends, and worst, to james. all of it was so fucking stressing.

“hey.” you heard someone whisper, and so you quickly dry your cheeks with your sleeves, turning around to face james.

“hi.” you whisper back, he signals to the chair next to you, asking if its taken. you shake your head in response, he smiles and sits down.

“what’s going on?” he asks, staring at you with his brows furrowed.

“don’t worry about it, you can leave. i know you have a date with that ravenclaw girl, i’m just upset. its nothing.”

“you really think i care about her?” he asks, rolling his eyes. “you’ve been quite upset these days, haven’t you?”

“yeah, i guess, don’t worry, really. you should go and have your fun.” you reply, smiling empathetically.

“i dont wanna go.” he answers quickly, he looks around, trying to find something to say. and then he sees your redish eyes.

“oh y/n, com’ere” he gets up, opening his arms, you roll your eyes playfully, getting up and hugging him. you dont know why but his hugs always made you feel better. it was like he took all of the sadness from you and just threw it out. he was wearing a new perfume. he smelled like 2 in one shampoo and lavender soap.

“you can go to your date, i’m fine. i swear.” you say, still hugging him.

“i dont wanna go. i wanna be here with you, that okay? plus, i need to catch up on history of magic.” he said, sweetly kissing the stop of your head, and afterwards, pressing his chin on top of it. and you didnt know if it was the moment or something else, but that was when you knew.

when you were sure of it all. when you needed to tell someone else or you’d explode.

“lily, i need to tell you something but you need to promise me this stays just between us. really.” you whisper as she takes a sip of her butterbeer.

“what’d you do?”

“i didn’t do shit. listen, don’t judge me, alright?” you reply, frustrated. she nods a yes. “i think i might be very into james and i have no idea how to deal with it.” you blurt out, staring at your own cup, too nervous to look at her.

“oh, i already knew that.” she answers.

“no you didn’t!” you whisper-shout at her

“i mean, it was a very firm theory. i just know you and the way you get silly around him and his dates sort of made me sure of it.” she smiles.

“god. im so stupid” you whisper, facepalming yourself.

“no you’re not. you should see the way he looks at you.” she says, grinning at how red your face is.

“lily, he’s had like, 20 girlfriends this past year, he’s not into me.” you answer, rolling you eyes.

“alright then.” she said, irony taking over her voice.

“im serious!” you reply, and she nods, still ironically.

for the rest of his 6th year, james didnt have any girlfriends. and on his 7th he had a few flings, but so did you.

“i just don’t get why you’re going out with this asshole!” james said while you walked with him to transfiguration class.

“he’s not like that, james, just give him a chance.” you smile at his horrified look to your comment.

“corrigan almost made me fall off my broom once, he actually is like that, sorry sweetheart.” he emphasized the part where he says corrigan is like that.

“james, we’re not getting married, its just a date.”

“a fourth date.”

“come on, he’s fun.”

“y/n, if you wanted fun you should be dating me.” you roll your eyes at that. “where’s he even taking you anyway?”

“madam puddifoot’s, i think” you answer, knowing exactly what was about to go on.

“oh, in his dreams. he’s gonna try to bang you i just know it.”

“at a tea shop?” you laugh.

“oh please, don’t tell me you’ll let that asshole suck your face.”

“i dont talk about who sucks YOUR face. because just let me add that this gale girl you’re going out with will probably give you a disease.” james laughs at that. “im serious! shes sick all the time, every time i see her shes coughing and sniffing and all of that.”

“that reminds me i gotta break up with her.” he sighs.

“nooo, why? i thought things were going well”

“nah, we’re just not good together.”

“maybe because every time you went out with her you used it as an excuse to spy on me and corrigan.”

“just trying to protect my closest friend. thats all” he smiles, winking at you and you swear you can melt into a puddle right there.

“shut up, you’re just doing this because you hate him.”

“im serious, darling. he IS an asshole.”

“i guess i’ll just have to figure it out myself.” you wink back at him.

-

“oh would you just look at that.” james whispered, looking through the window at mrs. puddifoots door.

he could ser how corrigans face was close to yours and how suddenly he kissed you, one hand on your upper thigh and the other on the back of your neck.

“is that jealousy im sensing, prongs?” sirius laughed.

“n-no! its just disgusting, he’s a prick” james was suddenly defensive.

“y/n/n seems to like him though” remus commented.

“shut up.” james said, still watching how corrigan was gripping onto you. ‘god, i hate him so much’ he thought to himself.

and that went on until you and corrigan broke up. he did end up making james fall off his broom, he had to get 20 stitches, and you cried about it. as soon as james hit the grass you were in the field, it wasn’t even a real match, just practice. you took him to the infirmary, you even held his hand.

“its just a few stitches, don’t worry about it.” he said, as the nurse started to clean the wound.

“20 is definitely not a few, just let me stay here.”

“she’s right” the nurse added, she rubbed alcohol onto the cut and james hissed.

“told you he was an asshole, hun”

“watch your mouth, mr potter” she added as he groaned again.

after you were finished with school, most of your friends went to work at the order of the phoenix, you had a part time job as a baratender but also participated in the order. james had been trying to convince you to quit the job, specially because your ex was the manager (even though he wouldn’t admit it).

“james!” you shouted, laying down at the couch in the orders house.

“what?!” he screamed back from the kitchen, he was making those god awful scrambled eggs you said you loved because he made them with such care you were sorry for his cooking skills.

“you’re taking anyone to sirius’s birthday tonight?” you ask, hoping to god he’d say no.

“no, mia and i broke up last month, remember?”

“of course i remember!” you were all smiley about it, you could squeal if he wasn’t there. even if it was silly, you were anxious to ask lily to come over and she’d help you pick out your outfit.

you both ended up deciding on a black dress she was willing to lend you. being so excited for something as casual as a friends birthday, was a bit stupid of you, that you could admit. but you couldn’t take your mind off of james now, sure it had been that way for like four years now, but he still was your best friend and you couldn’t do much about it. what was even worse was that his hugs, his voice, his smell, was all so addictive to you. and you tried, you really did, you just couldn’t.

when you got to the party at the order, you were a like two hours late, you got held back because of work and you still needed to get ready, but you somehow made it before they sung happy birthday. you wished sirius a happy birthday, giving him his gift and a tight hug. even though you weren’t close, he was still one of the most present people in your life, and you loved that about him, and so before you could even ask, he said:

“james is in the bathroom right now, but believe me, he’s been waiting for you all night though.” you smiled.

“thank you sirius, but i have other friends took, you know?” you said.

“he’ll love the dress” he whispered, and started walking away, you knew why. him and lily have been trying to get you and james together for ages now, and so you knew that when he just walked away like that, james was coming near, probably to talk to you.

“hey” you heard, and so you turned around to face him, and honestly, he looked great. he was wearing those jeans you liked and a shirt you complimented once.

“hi” you looked at him, smiling.

“you look amazing” he said, you felt your blood rush.

“thank you, i really like that shirt.” you felt the need to say something back.

“really?” he was just teasing you at this point.

“really.” and you liked to tease him back.

“y/n! finally, come on, we’re taking body shots” said lily, pulling you with her, and james came along.

everyone was there, laughing having fun. it was all super sweet, like you were in school again.

well, that was until sirius decided he’d make you regret you were ever born.

“PRONGS!” he shouted, as james was staring at him from a safe distance “COME ON LETS JOIN THE GAME, ITS YOUR TURN!”

“i’m not so sure about that, i feel like its sort of y/n’s turn, right?” james smirked to you, you glared at him. god, you didn’t know if you wanted to kiss him or kill him.

“ah james, you know how they say, gentlemen’s first? i believe that’s the phrase” you found yourself very idiotic in that place.

“i’m not drinking tonight though” james winked, you were trying to get yourself out of the situation, though it only seemed to get worse.

“perfect way to solve it, hear me out, y/n takes one off of james, problem solved!” sirius didn’t seem to have any common sense when he was drunk.

“good idea sirius!” said lily loudly through the music, and so you glared at her. this was definitely going to be the lowest point of your year, being sure james would say no, you looked over to him and he just decided to say

“fine by me” and just like that the shirt you liked too much was thrown on the counter.

“oh, uhm, okay then��� you felt hot and red and you were sure that was exactly how you looked and it did not feel good. you were hoping the lighting would mask i, until james said “no need to be nervous, princess” and somehow that made you even more nervous.

“you know how this works right? lick, shoot, suck?” james asked, and so you nodded a yes, staring at the ceiling. he slipped a lime wedge into his mouth, and so you begging for this torture to end because you already felt so wet it was scary.

his tongue fell upon the rind, and so he could taste the citric flavor as you sprinkled salt onto his skin, from his navel to his waistband. he felt himself blush but decided to just ignore it and try to focus on something else.

and so it begins, you didn’t know it, but maybe james was more nervous about that than you. he was begging to the universe, spirits, everything he could, to not get hard on that moment you leaned over him, your warm tongue sticking out and licking a stripe up the salt. he tried his best to suppress a groan, you smiled, nervously, as you took the shot from his stomach, he could hear sirius saying something loudly, lily screaming and remus’s laugh. and he just saw you.

leaning towards his face, you looked at him with your ‘i’m so sorry oh my god’ look, your lips falling and plucking the lime from his mouth, but when you were going to pull back, your lips touched around the wedge and you felt your whole body ignite as your lips brushed against his.

but as quick as you tasted him, as quick it was gone.

james quickly got up and fixed himself, putting his shirt back on.

“good job” he didnt know what else to say and just high-fived you. you smile confused.

“thanks i guess” you say, as lily pulls you to the side to discuss what happened right in front of her and wasnt just actually one of your dreams.

around three hours later the party ended, and james did actually drink, once most people were hone and you were headed to the guest room you felt a hand pulling you by your dress, holding on to the silky fabric. turning around you found yourself very up close to james potter.

“hi” you whispered.

“hi” he said lowly.

“is everything okay?” you asked, his breath smelling like mint and lemons.

“yeah” he answered, still staring “can i crash with you? ‘dont wanna go home” you nodded a yes, and suddenly his hand was on the back of your neck.

“i’m about to do something so stupid.” he whispered.

“so am i.” you answered, your eyes not really knowing where to focus, his eyes, his lips, his neck, his mouth.

“good.” he nodded, and suddenly his lips were brushing over yours, your eyes started to close and then there it was.

your lips met, softly completing one another, which involved a pulling back and crashing. his lips strong against yours, and then his tongue was brushing over your lips, and so you opened your mouth and god, you dont know for how long you waited. his hands now roaming your body, you felt the heat of his body, and he pulls back.

“youre so fucking pretty” he blurted out, going back to the kiss. his hands now on your lower back, you pull him towards the guest room.

and then you were both sat on the bed, your heels off and his shoes too. your lips still attached, more and more eager by the second, and now his lips were on your neck, teasing you, as his right grabbed onto your upper thigh and your dress was riding up.

he pulled away to take off his shirt, you just stared at him, having no idea what to say next.

“hey” he was so close.

“hi”

“you wanna do this? because if you don’t that’s fine by me, really, we can just forget it and pretend we were both really drunk” he started trailing off.

“no. i want you, really, i do” you were trying not to look at him because that would make you even more nervous. just like that, his lips were back on yours, his hand on your waist, laying you down on the bed, your head on the pillow as he unzipped your dress, he was back to working on your neck, pressing kisses and nipping at it as he started to pull down your dress, his knee right between your legs, he was so so close to where you needed him.

you felt his cold hand reach for your breast, his lips trailing down to your chest, starting to suck on one nipple as his hand stimulated the other. you couldn’t help but just run your hands through his hair as you let moans escape through your mouth.

“james” you whined, as he left a trail of kissed from you chest to your inner thighs.

“yeah princess?” he looked up at you with doe eyes, right between your parted legs.

“please” you whispered.

“i cant hear you, what’s that?” he teased.

“please, i need you.” he smirked at that, pressing a kiss to the damp spot on your lace panties, your body now electrified because of the gesture.

“can i take these off?”he asked, his thumb playing with the fabric as you nod, he smiles as he pulls them down your legs. he’s using his hands to part your thighs. you can feel his breathing over your clit, he watches you as he places his thumb pad over your clit, rubbing it in slow circles and you let out a moan. his arm coming up, resting across your stomach.

embarrassment quickly turns into pleasure as he starts to kitten lick your clit.

his lips now attached as you threaded your hands into his hai, tugging and making james grunt. he’s slipping in a finger and you start to whimper.

“that feels good?” he asks, pulling his mouth off of you, you nod.

“yes, please…" he’s smiling lightly at that.

“what is it, huh? can you take another? is that it?” he teasingly asks, you whisper a yes. he watched his fingers as they slipped into you, he lets out a low groan. his fingers moving quicker as the feeling in your abdomen got stronger. his lips attach again to you clit and you whimper at the feeling. he’s flicking his tongue and his fingers are hitting the perfect spot.

“james”you whisper, he looks up at you, his fingers still going at it. “i need you now, i’m serious.”you blurt out, his fingers leave you, making you feel empty, his thumb rubs your clit as he goes up to kiss you, you’re able to taste yourself on his mouth. you moan into the kiss as he rubs you clit. his hands leave you, he starts to take off his pants, your heart races as he unbuckles his belt.

he reaches up to pin your knees up to your chest, you can feel the bulge on his underwear as he goes up to kiss you harshly. god, he did feel big.

“you sure about it?”he asks one more time.

“yes”you quickly answer.

“good girl.” you feel your soul leave your body because of the praise. he takes a moment to palm himself through the boxers,

“fuck, need you so bad” he whispers. you moan as his pulls himself out of his boxers, his erection hitting up against his stomach. he runs his hand up and down the shaft, you can feel his tip up against you.

“shit”you whisper,

“gonna be a good girl?” he’s lining himself up against you.

“yes, please, i will” you quickly answer, giving in because of how needy you were. he presses himself closer to you, stretching you around him.

“of course you are.”he says lowly, “tell me if you want me to stop, okay?”he says, and you nod. he pushes himself into you just in one stroke, the sudden stretch makes you moan breathlessly. he groans into the crook of your neck, biting down on a soft spot. “still so tight. you feel so good, princess” he praises, and wastes no time and starts to move, shallowly rolling his hips up to you. he kisses your neck as you moan.

“oh my god”you whimper. he’s thrusting harder now, starting to pick up a pace. you moan as he trusts forward, filling you up so well. you were starting to adjust to his size. your hands were back on his hair, holding on to it for dear life.

"fuck, james, harder please." he cocks an eyebrow, then pulls out to the tip, you whine at the loss,

"you asked for it, alright?” he thrusts forward roughly, filling you up with his cock, you feel him even deeper this time, the press of him against your walls making you whine louder as he thrusted even harder,

"can you take this, hun?" he fucks into you rapidly, mocking you, pushing you against the headboard, "you said you wanted it harder, didnt you?" your cheeks start to burn up. “you feel so fucking good” he groaned, the heat in your stomach building up again. you were blabbing incoherent phrases, all similar to ‘fuck please’ and ‘holy shit, oh my god james’. he’s filling you up perfectly and your walls start to tighten against him.

the sound of the slap of skin fills up the room, the base of him stimulating your clit along with his thumb, his right hand reaches up to your neck, squeezing lightly. he can tell youre close, the way your hips started to buck up, grinding needily. you yelp as he throws your legs over his shoulders, fucking you even deeper and hitting your g-spot.

“need it so bad, please” you whimper and he hums at that.

“need what?” he’s back to teasing again.

“i need to cum, please.”he’s fucking into you faster and harder than before. you clamped around him desperately, your high building up. he felt it, his hand pinching your clit as you moan in pleasure. his thrusts only getting harsher along with your whining. you just couldn’t hold it in anymore.

“you can cum princess, don’t worry” his thumb rolls on your clit faster, just like his thrusts. you came with a cry of his name, walls clenched around him as you gripped the back of his neck. seeing you, head thrown back in ecstasy, in pleasure as you cry out his name has him groaning, head dropped into the crook of your neck as his thrusts get faster and sharper, the overstimulation of it drawing out high keening noises from your throat, his cock nudging against your cervix as he spills inside of you.

"fuck, so good for me, princess," he kisses your shoulder, "such a good girl," he murmurs.

he pulls out slowly, putting himself back in his boxers, and lays you down when you mumble that you're too sore to sit up. he grins at that and you shove him, "what-? i'm just proud of myself that's all."

“you’re an idiot, you know that, right?” you tease him.

“you have no idea. i’ve loved you since i was seventeen.” he smiles, a bit nervous with his confession. and you pull him into a kiss.

“i’ve been in love with you since the first time i saw you” you whisper, and he lays down next to you, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head.

[n0vabug]

Toxic

Summary: Maddy thinks the reader is cheating on her

Warnings: Angst, swearing, mentions of cheating, Cassie being a bitch and flirting with the reader, slight mentions of drinking, etc. Words: 1.5k

THIRD PERSON POV

(Y/N) was a pretty quiet person, but could be very talkative if she was comfortable enough. (Y/N) had met Kat during their Freshmen year, they quickly became very close. As they got further into high school, they met more and more people and their friend group started to form. Kat, (Y/N), Lexi, Cassie, Maddy, Jules, and Rue. (Y/N) had set her eyes on Cassie Howard at first, they dated in their Sophomore year for about 3 months, but Cassie got really controlling and a bit crazy too. After that, (Y/N) went through a bit of a depressive episode, because even though Cassie was controlling and crazy, (Y/N) had still loved her. Maddy quickly noticed (Y/N) during this time, so Maddy decided to try and help her through this. Cassie was her best friend after all, so Maddy gave some great advice and became really close with (Y/N). After that (Y/N) developed feelings for Maddy and accidentally blurted it out once while she was drunk. Maddy mentioned it when (Y/N) was sober, and lets just say, it went great. They started dating the summer before Junior year and during Junior year.

It is Sunday, which was always when Maddy and (Y/N) hung out together, they usually went out to different places. Yes, every weekend, but both of them seemed to really love it and if one of them had a bad week, or just had any stress or something bad going on, that's when they would go to the other's house, and have a movie night with their favorite snacks and drinks, whoever was sad or stressed got to pick the movie they watched and got a lot of kisses and cuddles.

"(Y/N) come here!" Maddy yelled from the other side of the store. "Yes, Maddy?"

"You would look so good in this!" Maddy held up a dress, which in (Y/N's) opinion, was very ugly."1. I love you Maddy, but I hate that color. 2. Again, I love you, but I'm gonna be completely honest, that is really ugly."

"Ugh, whatever bitch, it would probably look better on me anyways." Maddy said jokingly, which made (Y/N) give Maddy a look of offense. "Chill out, I'm just joking." Maddy said, then giving (Y/N) a quick peck on the lips.

(Y/N) and Maddy walked around the mall, with their hands intertwined the entire time, until they finished going inside every store that looked appealing to them. As they were about to walk out, Maddy spoke up, "Okay so like I really need to pee, I'm going to find a bathroom before I get a UTI." (Y/N) chuckled at this and just waited for Maddy outside the bathroom. While standing there, (Y/N) thought she had seen a familiar face walk inside a store. The familiar face being Cassie Howard along with her younger sister, Lexi Howard. It was rare for them to get along like this to the point where they actually did stuff together without their friend group, but it happens sometimes. (Y/N's) thoughts are interrupted by Maddy walking out.

"You ready to go?" Maddy asks.

"Yeah"

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine why?"

"You just seem super out of it"

"I'm just kinda tired, Mads. Getting 3 hours of sleep and then drinking an energy drink in the morning, is not the best thing to do, it's starting to catch up with me." (Y/N) says while laughing. Both girls leave the store and get in (Y/N's) car, (Y/N) drops Maddy off at home, goes to her own house, showers, and goes to sleep.

The next morning, (Y/N) got up and got ready for school. When she walked in, she was immediately greeted by her girlfriend.

"Hey!" Maddy yelled as she ran up to (Y/N). "Hi, I got to go to class, okay? I'll see you later!" (Y/N) says. They both say their goodbyes and walk to their classes. (Y/N) was walking to class but quickly got stopped by someone calling her name.

"(Y/N), hey, can we maybe talk for a moment?" (Y/N) turns around, and sees her ex-girlfriend, Cassie Howard. "I guess so, about what?" (Y/N) ask suspiciously, she would have never expected Cassie to be talking to her right now.

"I can tell you're still in love with me, (Y/N)" Cassie says as she grabs (Y/N) by the waist and pulls her closer. "Cassie, what are you talking about, I have a girlfriend, please get your hands off of me." The younger girl says, but Cassie doesn't listen, she lifts up (Y/N's) chin with her finger. "Cassie, stop, I have a girlfriend!"

What neither of them didn't realize, is that Maddy and Lexi had seen the whole thing, Lexi had saw how (Y/N) tried pushing off her sister and wasn't enjoying it, but Maddy on the other hand, didn't realize that (Y/N) wasn't enjoying this, Maddy instead had thought (Y/N) was cheating on her.

"You fucking bitch, did you actually think you could cheat on me and fucking get away with it?!" Maddy yelled at (Y/N). "You know what, (Y/N)? You weren't the fucking shit anyways!" (Y/N) had tears streaming down her face.

"Maddy it's not like that (Y/N) wasn't-" Lexi tried to help (Y/N) out but Maddy shut her up.

"Shut the fuck up, Lexi, this doesn't fucking concern you!" Maddy yelled at the Lexi. "Why the fuck are you crying. You weren't shit (Y/N), you were fucking annoying, and you weren't even that fucking hot either. You were a shitty ass girlfriend, and I hope I never fucking see you again!" Maddy ran to the bathroom with tears in her eyes, (Y/N) fell to the floor with her knees against her chest, uncontrollably sobbing.

"Cassie, why the fuck would you do that?" Lexi yelled at her older sister as she then followed Maddy to the bathroom.

Lexi saw Maddy standing at the sinks, trying to fix her makeup that was a bit messed up since she let a few tears slip. "Maddy?" Lexi tried approaching Maddy calmly to avoid being yelled at again. "I know you don't want me to be talking to you right now, but there is something really important I thought you should know. "What is it?" Maddy says confused and partially annoyed. "(Y/N) wasn't cheating on you, Cassie grabbed her and started being all weird and flirty with her, (Y/N) was trying to push Cassie away, I just thought you should know that." Lexi said which made Maddy's face change to guilt. "Are you sure?" Maddy asked. "Just because Cassie is my sister, doesn't mean I'm always going to take her side, but just trust me, I know (Y/N). She loves you, she would've never done something like that." Lexi before walking out to check on (Y/N).

"Hey, you alright?" Lexi asked (Y/N). "I just don't understand. I mean why did she immediately assume I was doing something wrong, does she not trust me? Did she really mean all those things?" (Y/N) said through tears, Lexi wrapped her arms around her. "She didn't mean any of those things, she was just mad. She may look confident, but deep down she gets scared and insecure. Trust me, she still loves you." Lexi reassured the older girl.

Lexi sat there for a few minutes with her arms wrapped around (Y/N) until Maddy started walking in their direction. "I'll leave you two alone" Lexi walked away and went to her class.

Maddy kneeled down next to (Y/N). "Maddy, I promise I would never do any-" (Y/N) is cut off by a passionate kiss, which was surprising because she thought she was about to be killed. "I'm sorry, I may have assumed a bit too quickly that you still liked Cassie and were cheating on me with her, I just get really scared sometimes? What I said was pretty harsh, and I promise you didn't mean any of it, I was just really mad in the moment. Can you forgive me? I love you."

"I guess I can forgive you, but if anything like this happens again, just please try and ask me about it first instead of yelling, but thank you for apologizing, I love you too." (Y/N) says. "Okay I can try and do that, only for you though, but do you forgive me enough to leave this shitty place and go to my house, we can maybe watch a movie and order food?" (Y/N) smiled at this. "Yeah I do, that sounds great"

Both girls went back to Maddy's house, they both changed into something comfier and laid in Maddy's bed, their bodies intertwined with one another. They stayed like this all day and even after they fell asleep.

A/N Sorry for taking so long to write this, I have been pretty busy 😭😭. Anyways I didn't proofread this because it's 3 in the morning and I have to wake up in 4 hours. If you have any requests for any Euphoria characters, or any characters I write for in general, then lmk, requests are always open. By the way, I have a couple Sam Carpenter imagines on my Wattpad that I haven't posted on here, so if you want to check it out, my Wattpad is @n0vabug! By the way thank you so much for all the notes, I highly appreciate it!

[berenwrites]

Always and Forever - Stranger Things - Steddie - G

Rating: G | cw: none | tags: fluff, very light angst, Corroded Coffin, rockstars, touring

Prompt: Love is going out of your way to do something you know will make them happy (@forgottenkanji)

A/N: Written for @steddielovemonth day 29. Sorry I disappeared from this challenge halfway through. We lost one of our kitties (she was 14 ½) and I just kind of lost the impetus, but I figured I had to write something for the last day at least. No beta today because it was a last minute thing.

Also on AO3 soon | All My Other Stranger Things Fic

Always and Forever: Love Finds a Way

Steve stared at the phone for a long time after he put it down with the usual ‘I love you’. He spoke to Eddie every day after he got home and before Eddie was due on stage with the rest of Corroded Coffin. The three-month tour was nearly over, and it had done so much for the band’s popularity. Usually, Eddie sounded excited on the phone, even though he professed to miss Steve as much as Steve missed him.

Tonight, hadn’t been like that.

All Steve had been able to hear was the strain in Eddie’s voice. Oh, Eddie had tried to cover it with his usual exuberance, but Steve knew his boyfriend far too well. Something was wrong.

Before he could talk himself out of it, he picked up the phone again. He rang through to the band’s hotel, but this time he asked for a different room number.

“Hello,” came the rather disgruntled answer after a couple of rings.

“Gareth, what’s wrong with Eddie?” Steve asked without beating around the bus.

“Steve?” Gareth asked, although Steve was pretty sure it was just a stall.

“Gareth,” Steve said in a tone that usually had the not-kids-anymore kids jumping to do whatever he was telling them to.

There was a sigh from the other end.

“He’s having nightmares again,” Gareth finally said after a few moments silence.

“What? Why?” Steve asked.

“There was an incident at one of the venues,” Gareth revealed. “Nothing major, just some fans managed to get backstage and thought it would be hilarious to try and scare the big bad metal band. They had these demon masks and party poppers and hid in the green room. Security got rid of them, but it spooked all of us a bit.”

“If I ever get my hands on those assholes, I will fucking kill them,” Steve growled out, mind jumping to the nail bat he still kept under the bed.

The Upside Down was closed off, there hadn’t been any trouble for three years, but he could never quite shake the need to have a weapon to hand. He could only imagine what it was like for Eddie on tour in strange places. After all, Eddie had nearly died.

“They were just stupid kids,” Gareth did his best to sound soothing, but Steve was pretty sure they were actually in agreement.

“Why didn’t he mention it to me?” Steve asked.

“Probably because he didn’t want to worry you,” Gareth replied. “We’ll make sure he’s okay, Steve,” Gareth promised. “We love him too.”

“Yeah, I know,” he said, taking a deep breath. “Thanks. Don’t tell him I called, okay? He’ll only worry about me worrying.”

“No problem,” Gareth replied. “Sorry, I have to go, the van’s waiting downstairs.”

“Knock ‘em dead,” Steve replied, “and thanks again.”

“See you in a couple of weeks,” Gareth said, and the line clicked off.

Putting the receiver back in the cradle, Steve stared at the phone for a little while longer. It was as he picked it up for the third time, he realised he had made the decision before he had even put it down the first time.

He didn’t stop moving until he was in sitting on the plane. He’d let Robin and Dustin know he was going and asked them to pass on the information. Robin had told him to ‘go get his man’. He’d packed a bag and called a taxi to the airport, barely pausing to make sure he had anything but his wallet. Luckily the girl on the ticket desk had taken pity on him and found him a not completely terrible flight across the country. Staring out the window, all he could think about was Eddie.

By the time he reached the hotel it was the early hours of the morning. He didn’t need to ask reception because he already knew the room number, so he headed straight up. When he stepped out on the right floor a guy in a black suit lurking in the shadows gave him a look. Apparently, someone was taking security seriously now. Corroded Coffin was what some publications liked to call an over-night sensation, even though they had been working hard for several years that didn’t seem to count. You couldn’t turn on a rock station without them coming up. They deserved to be looked after.

Also apparently, someone had briefed the security guy well, because he glared at Steve for a few moments and then appeared to relax. How security knew what he looked like he decided not to ask.

Walking quickly along the hall he got to Eddie’s door. The first thing he noticed was the sound of an acoustic guitar. Not really a surprise after what Gareth had told him. When Eddie couldn’t sleep, he always retreated to his music.

Lifting his hand, Steve knocked.

The guitar playing stopped.

Steve knocked again when no one answered the door.

A second later, the door was yanked inwards, and Eddie was staring at him as if he didn’t quite believe what he was seeing.

“Steve,” Eddie said, eyes big and round.

“Hi,” he replied and gave Eddie a little wave.

“Am I dreaming?” Eddie asked and sounded just a little afraid Steve wasn’t real.

“Nope,” he said, reaching out and touching the side of Eddie’s face.

Eddie almost clocked himself on the side of the head with his guitar, clearly forgetting he was holding it as he tried to cover Steve’s hand with his own. At which point, Steve took the guitar and gently shepherded Eddie back into the room. Once the door was closed, he put the guitar down, dropped his own bag and crowded into Eddie’s personal space.

“Missed you,” he said, taking Eddie’s face in his hands.

The were dark circles under Eddie’s eyes and his skin was pale, but he was just a beautiful to Steve as always.

“Missed you too,” Eddie replied, a tiny smile quirking his lips as he drank Steve in with his eyes. “How?”

“Need you to be happy, Eds,” he said, leaning forward so their foreheads were touching. “That’s all that matters.”

“But…”

“No buts,” he interrupted. “Need to hold you and chase the nightmares away.”

“Who told you?” Eddie asked, but there was no heat to his tone even as he wound his arms around Steve.

“Twisted Gareth’s arm,” Steve confessed, wrapping Eddie in a tight embrace. “Knew something was wrong on the phone earlier.”

“Not as good an actor as I think I am, huh?” Eddie said into his shirt.

“Only to me,” Steve assured him, “and well probably Wayne.”

That startled a laugh out of Eddie, but he didn’t move from his position in Steve’s arms.

“God I love you,” Eddie said.

“Me too,” Steve replied, “always and forever.”

When Eddie had gone off on tour it had seemed like such a big thing, the first reality of the rockstar lifestyle. Steve had worried it would pull them apart, but what he’d realised during the earlier phone call, was it was all irrelevant. All the mattered to him was Eddie. Everything else was just details to be worked out.

He didn’t have a plan. Hadn’t had more than the sure and certain knowledge he needed to get to Eddie. He would work out what to do next when he woke up in the morning with Eddie in his arms. That was the important part.

All My Other Stranger Things Fic

[nausikaaa]

Six Sentence Sunday

happy solstice, last day of saturnalia, and not-quite-almost christmas! i hope you're all having a nice holiday season. i'm at work pretty much every day until January, because pubs do well at christmas, which is why i've fallen so behind on reading other people's wip shares.

plus i've been keeping a close eye on my goats, since the girls, Juno, Lucy and Mina, are in with the billy, Hadrian. so far he has gotten lucky plenty, but the girls have come back round in season all the same. i know he can do the job because he did it last year, so it's just bad luck and i've got to keep my fingers crossed it will hold the second or third time.

anyhoo. thanks for the tags today and on wednesday @forabeatofadrum @that-disabled-princess @bookish-bogwitch and @artsyunderstudy!

today i have some more of my post-trojan war wip, with a preamble:

so basically, part of my story follows Briseis, Achilles' war bride, after the events of the Iliad, but there are no sources as far as i can find that say what happens to her. so, i had to plot out what reasonably could have happened, and i eventually figured that if she was legally considered his wife (which is complicated in and of itself- Achilles was already married, but bigamy was sometimes practised by Greek kings, and Patroclus promises Briseis in the Iliad to make Achilles marry her. my Briseis is pregnant, which makes these things simultaneously more and less complicated) she would travel with Neoptolemus, Achilles' son by that aforementioned other wife, and Phoenix, Achilles' old mentor, either of whom would likely have become her male guardian upon his death, to Phthia, Achilles' homeland, where she would become a ward of Peleus, Achilles' father and the patriarch of the child(ren) she is carrying.

so with that sorted: it's mentioned in some sources that after the war, Neoptolemus walked his army from Troy back to Greece, which was honestly a good call because the moment the Greeks set sail, they hit a storm, which sank Ajax's ship and killed him as punishment for him raping Cassandra in a temple, blew Helen and Menelaus off course to Egypt, and blew Odysseus off course too, and we all know that didn't go well for him. we know Phoenix took this journey too because it's noted he died and was buried along the way.

so, walking an entire army from Turkey to Greece. it's doable, it won't even take you that long, but you'll need to stop for supplies such as food. and that got me wondering, what the hell would an army have to buy food with? sure, they would probably be willing to part with some stolen booty, but it was a status symbol, they would want to hold onto the best stuff.

the answer is obvious, but unfortunate.

To some it was a relief to reach a town, but those of us who knew how the world worked were not so sure.

If the people were amenable, there would be trade for food and wine. And what did the Achaeans have in surplus to offer in exchange for such things?

If they were not so welcoming, the soldiers would simply attack, taking what they wanted, and the numbers of their one export would grow.

Women, always women, trading hands, pulled this way and that. Even the war that started it all was over a woman; who could own her, who could bed her.

tags/hellos/holiday well wishes: @cutestkilla @run-for-chamo-miles @roomwithanopenfire @prettygoododds @ic3-que3n @blackberrysummerblog @j-nipper-95 @youarenevertooold @larkral @orange-peony @aristocratic-otter @thewholelemon @alexalexinii @confused-bi-queer @shrekgogurt @comesitintheclover @raenestee @hushed-chorus @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @noblecorgi @shemakesmeforget @ileadacharmedlife @supercutedinosaurs @otherpeoplesheartachept-2 @ninemagicks @otherworldsivelivedin @jasonfunderberkerthefrogexists @carryonmylovelies and @meanjeansjeans!

and for reading all this, here's Olive in her christmas outfit and the dogs in theirs!

[swxrxgini]

Childhood friends to lovers troupe with Aditya is living in my head rent free, perhaps, you could offer some hcs for it please 🥹

Brain empty, only Aditya

| : Aamras and friends

Receiver.... Author's note: "Dear, Thank you so much for requesting this!! I loved it so much and it's honestly so damn cute!!"

Receiver.... Synopsis: "Aditya and you, friends since young, fall in love. HCs about being childhood friends and falling in love with Aditya Kashyap!!"

Receiver.... Warnings: "nothing really? Fluff, childhood shenanigans? Might not be correct to the movie cause I watched it very long ago, forgive my mistakes!! Geet and Aditya are only friends here! Mentions of Maths. Mentions of suicide, Geet gets with your brother (i made him up)"

◊ Oh my god!! Imagine you and Aditya as friends and sitting in the sun eating raw mangoes?? So cute! You both probably met due to your parents being friends or you both were close in school and you got your parents to be friends as well! Or maybe you were neighbors who went to same school?

◊ You and him grew up so close, slacking off in computer lab as you both watched stupid shit, passing notes in class, trying to help each other memorize the multiplication table up until 30, then memorize square and square roots until 30 and cube and the cube roots until 25. You both got close thanks to torturing Maths.

◊ But that was until the marriage affair of his parents, where he took the deal a bit too hard to his heart. And then his father's death happened after you both grew up, his business going in the dumps.

◊ After the years, he slowly started to become more and more reclusive and depressed, contemplating. One day while after a meeting, you both meet up, but he seemed out of it and you both climbed a train despite the reluctance, meeting a very bubbly girl, Geet Dhillon. You three talked a bit, and you and Geet managed to shake him out of his suicidal thoughts.

◊ In the middle of the night, Aditya gets off, ans you follow him, since you felt weird leaving the boy alone, Geet followed you both asking you both to get on the train, but she herself missed the train...She gets Aditya and you to drive her to the next station, but ends up missing it again...

◊ Geet then demanded to have you both take her home and you both agreed. You grinned as you and her quickly bonded, but Aditya took a bit of time, but it was fine since they became friends. two girlies with a boy tired of the girlies's bullshit. :)

◊ She opened up to you both about her boyfriend whom she wanted to marry, but couldn't because of her parents and the religious differences. While Aditya spoke of how his then girlfriend (whom you were a bit suspicious of) left him to marry someone else, and you hummed nodding how you broke up with your toxic ex boyfriend who was mentally ruining you.

◊ You and Geet were basically besties at that point, with Aditya being both of your guardians probably. You and her tried your best to bring Aditya back to his old fun self, with the power of self-love, friendship and what not.

◊ You, Geet and Aditya became a trio for a while, doing stupid shit together while Aditya simply tried to stop you both from getting in trouble, you three got close. Geet but noticed the chemistry between you two, the longing stare of yours towards him and him staring at you as if you were diamond and gold.

◊ She actually helped Aditya ask you out, asking you if you wanted to go to a restaurant, bu bailed last minute, not only that it's her Aditya goes to for dating advice. You three were closest and it became the friendship of "third wheeling friend becomes baby of the couple in the group", so there's that.

◊ She even tells you both about her plans to run away to be with Anshuman, because she was upset she wasn't gonna be able to marry him.

◊ Her relatives were very happy, you brought her back and had you both stay. And then while they were planning her marriage date, she came to you both, telling you both that she was eloping and was bidding farewell to you two, you both argued with her for a while, before you three were caught mid act by her sister and had to eventually run away..

◊ As she convinced you both to run away with her leaving her family, leaving her family with the idea of Geet being attracted to both boys and girls which was slightly embarrassing for both of you. You both and her had to eventually part ways since she wanted to leave to her boyfriend in Manali, Himachal Pradesh..

◊ You and him let her go her way to her so called boyfriend while you both also became slightly distanced, but stayed close nonetheless. You helped him take breaks, though rarely, you both spent time out in restaurants, mostly spending time at street food vendours or chowpatis.

◊ He started to be less depressed and more the same Aditya you knew before as a child, all the more while you both fell in love, you both missed Geet but didn't get into any type of contact with her afterwards.

◊ He would happily take you shopping whenever you want, whenever you wanted, he was always happy to spoil with his business growing good. He definitely took some lessons from you and Geet aabout sunshine and bright outlook on life which helped him a bit.

◊ Thought a bit reluctant, as you encouraged him, he also bonded with his mother who eloped with another man in the affair or something. It was awkward, but fine, whatever Aditya wanted, you were fine with it.

◊ You and him would often go to shops to drink aamras, mango joosh. Because it's a delicacy and why not? And also childhood snacks, it's so great!!

◊ Around nine months later, Geet's family saw an ad on Adtiya's business launch event and they confronted you both in his office while you were there, demanding you both bring Geet back because she never came home and gave you both two days..

◊ You and Aditya eventually went back to Manali to learn that Geet did come there to meet her boyfriend, but Anshuman rejected her because he didn't want to marry her, you had to be held back a bit before you punched the dude..

◊ You and Aditya trace her back to Shimla and go there to look for Geet, finding her live a reclusive life, working as a teacher in her old school, you were a bit disappointed, but you and Aditya tried to help her receive the sunshine outlook on life yet again.

◊ But Anshuman wanted to start a new, while uncertain of him, you four head back to Bathinda back. Her family was still under the impression she eloped with you and Aditya and it was very weird and awkward for a bit, while Geet tried to explain her side, but was unable to do so. You felt bad and tried to get her to talk to Anshuman tomorrow morning, while Aditya and you laid in bed together, explaining how you both were leaving the next day as you nodded.

◊ As you and Aditya were leaving tomorrow while Geet talked, she didn't want to be with Anshuman longer and ran and followed you both, cause she seemed happier with you two beside her as friends, leaving Anshuman behind heartbroken while Aditya tried to stop you shove a middle finger up his face and kick or punch him for hurting such a sweet girl as Geet.

◊ Overall, very cute relationship but you share your life experiences with Geet as well as she teases you both, visiting with her husband and your brother to your two daughters, telling them about experiences, all while you and Aditya tried not to cringe out of embarrassment at the embarrassing things she told your girls.. <333

© This writing work belongs to me, swxrxgini, Aurelia, Rosilabeth, Cerine, kiara. Reblogging is appreciated, but plagiarizing or copying my works is forbidden, thank you for reading this and if you like this check out my blog!

[herofics]

Hey! So I saw one similar, it was one regarding aizawas daughter getting raped, it's also a comfort thing for me, since it's happened before but do you think you could write the same but endeavors the dad's and Katsuki bakugous the boyfriend, also with shoto content? If not you could just do endeavor only, but thank you!

A/N: The post mentioned can be found here. I tried to do some stuff for all three, Bakugou Endeavor and Shouto. I wrote it so the reader is Shouto’s twin sister, so they’ve got the same quirk, and because Endeavour didn’t think she could be a top hero, he mostly focused on Shouto and the reader was kind of left alone with their other siblings. Bakugou is the reader's boyfriend and he tells Endeavor. They’re third years I’d say. Goddammit I’ve been working on this on and off for weeks and it ended up really fucking long, at least compared to what I usually write…

Warnings: SA/rape, suicidal ideation

Word count: 3385

This happened to so many people, so many other women and girls, men and boys. You hadn’t seen it coming, there were no signs of what was about to happen, but it happened anyway. You were alone at home, sick, and as you went to the kitchen to grab something to eat, you noticed that the housekeeper had let the fridge repair guy in. You knew he was supposed to come today, you had just completely forgotten.

It must have been convenient for a man like this to have a quirk like the one he had. To paralyze someone by touching their skin, and from what you’d gathered to keep them paralyzed as long as he was touching them. What a horrible power to have for someone with the urges he possessed. You couldn’t talk, you couldn’t scream, you couldn’t move. You could only lay there and see and feel it happen to you. Afterwards he left you laying on your own bed and went back to fixing the fridge at the other end of the house.

You felt sick, and even after the effects of his quirk wore off you couldn’t move. At that moment, you wanted to die. You wanted to disappear, to just not exist anymore. You heard the front door open and close in the distance. He was gone, and you felt ruined.

When you were finally able to get up from the bed and drag yourself into the shower, it had probably been hours, or at least that’s what it felt like. You threw all your clothes, stained or not, in the hamper and stepped into the shower. You didn’t want to report it, you didn’t want to bring that shame to your family. You were the child of the former number one hero, and the one of the strongest upcoming pros. How could you let this happen to you? This wasn’t supposed to happen.

You turned the shower so hot that you could barely stand it. You felt like you needed to sanitize yourself somehow. Could you just burn this feeling off your skin? There probably weren’t flames hot enough to get rid of how dirt you felt right now. You stood in the shower for ages, or at least that’s what it felt like, but the feeling that you were stained, just wouldn’t go away.

When you finally got out of the shower and got some clean clothes on, you ended up just staring at your bed. You were quiet as you ripped all the sheets off your bed and burned them in the backyard. There was nothing left of them once you were done and you just went back inside. You couldn’t lay on the bed, not even sit on the edge of it. You almost wanted to break it into pieces and burn it in the backyard too.

You suddenly felt this immense anger well up in your chest. You hated that man. You wanted to hurt him so badly he would never be able to touch another person again. You wanted him to die, but there was nothing you could do, at least nothing you could do to him. Your room however, your bed? You could very easily destroy them. You started throwing your things around the room in anger, while the hot tears started streaming down your face. When you were done, your room was in shambles and your bed was in pieces. There were burn marks everywhere, and pieces of ice on the floor. It was a miracle the fire alarm hadn’t gone off.

You were breathing heavily, just staring at the floor, feeling like you were in a daze. When your phone rang, you didn't even hear it at first. It took you a while to react to it, but when you picked up your phone from the desk, you saw it was Katsuki calling. You didn’t even realize it was already three in the afternoon, so he had gotten out of school for the day.

“Hey, I’m coming over” he said as you picked up.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, I don’t want you to get sick too” you said apathetically.

“I’m coming over to cook you some fucking soup, it’ll help you get well quicker. I’m not taking no for an answer” he said and hung up.

There was definitely something odd about your voice. Even if you were sick, you sounded very apathetic and quite frankly off.

“Are you going to see (Name)?” Shouto asked, having overheard the brief phone call.

“Yeah, she didn’t really sound like herself. Is there something going on?” Bakugou noted.

“Not that I know of” Shouto shrugged.

You didn’t want to see him. You didn’t want to see anyone, but Katsuki was coming over no matter what you said. Maybe you could just avoid him and push him onto your brother, while claiming to be too sick to come out of your room. You took the time it took Katsuki to reach your family’s home, to compose yourself. You didn’t want to give him the impression there was anything wrong. You could probably blame a lot on the flu you had, but Katsuki was sometimes too perceptive for his own good.

When Bakugou got to the Todoroki family home, he made his way to your room. He knocked, and he could hear someone moving inside.

“I told you. I’m too sick to see you” you said, through the door.

You couldn’t let him in. Your room was basically destroyed and you didn’t have a reasonable explanation that you wanted to give him

“Oh come on, I never get sick anyway, it’s gonna be fine” Bakugou said and tried the door handle.

It was locked, which was odd. Were you really so afraid of getting him sick or was there something else going on? He noticed something weird. There was a smell of something burnt in the air. Not something that was still burning but something that had been extinguished.

“Are you okay?” Bakugou asked.

“I’m-I’m fine” you muttered, barely coherent.

“Don’t be an idiot, I can tell when you’re lying” he said calmly.

You could feel your knees buckle from under you. You felt sick, and you couldn’t hold it back anymore. You could feel the vomit climbing up your throat, just before you spewed the contents of your stomach on the floor next to you.

“I swear to god (Name), I’m going to break this door down if you don’t open it” Bakugou growled.

You reached for the lock on the door and opened it. Bakugou stepped back as you opened the door and you basically fell into the hallway. He caught you just before you hit the floor and you clung to his jacket.

You just cried, you tried to talk, but all that came was an incoherent mess that Bakugou couldn’t make any sense of. You didn’t want to tell him, not really, but you needed to tell someone. You just wanted to get rid of this feeling of your head exploding. It was all too much.

“What’s going on? Talk to me” he pleaded.

You couldn’t talk, not coherently anyway, and you were just clinging to Bakugou’s jacket. He could see into your room now, and it was absolutely destroyed. Bakugou really didn’t know what to make of this. What on earth could have happened? All he could do was wait, so he just ended up holding you until you calmed down enough to talk.

Shouto had heard your crying and he did want to check up on you, but he decided not to, since he saw that Bakugou was already with you. He didn’t want to intrude or eavesdrop, so he just went into his room, and left you and Bakugou alone. He could still hear a faint sobbing coming from the hallway. Shouto had never seen you like this. Sure, he’d seen you cry, but you sounded incredibly distressed and he was getting that impression without even really seeing you. He wasn’t sure if he would have known how to comfort you, but he wanted to find out what was going on. He would just have to ask you later.

“I don’t-I don’t know what to do Kats. I don’t know-know what to do” you stammered.

You were still crying but considerably calmer than before, maybe he would be able to get some answers out of you right now.

“What the fuck’s going on? What happened?” Bakugou asked, keeping his voice as calm as he could. He could feel the pit in this stomach grow as you looked up at him with your eyes full of pain.

“That fridge repair guy… He followed me to my room and… and he raped me…” your voice faded during the last few words, and Bakugou could only barely hear you.

He didn’t know what to say. What could he say in a situation like the one before him now? Mostly he was worried, but there was a part of him that was so incredibly angry it made him feel like he wanted to seriously hurt the bastard who had touched you.

“We need to call the cops” Bakugou said, already reaching for his phone.

“Please no, don’t do that” you begged.

“That piece of shit needs to pay for what he did, of course we’re calling the cops” Bakugou said, confused as to why you were so against it.

“No, we’re not. It’s not going to do anything. I already took a shower, so there’s probably no evidence left and I don’t want to bring that shame to my family” you tried to reason with him.

“Fine, but you need to tell your dad at least” Bakugou demanded.

“I-I can’t, he’s going to be so-so disappointed in me”

“Hey, it wasn’t your fucking fault, don’t you dare think that” Bakugou said sternly. “Your old man might be strict, but he’s not a fucking idiot. Besides, if he blames you for this, I’m going to kick his ass”

You didn’t want to tell him yourself. You didn’t want to see the disappointment in his eyes. You were terrified he would think you were as dirty as you felt yourself to be. You didn’t want to bring that shame into your family, but Katsuki was probably right. Maybe he would be willing to talk to your dad for you, so you didn’t have to see his initial reaction.

“Can you tell him? I can’t really face him right now” you muttered.

“I can tell him, but you know he’s going to want to talk to you after that”

“I-I think I can handle that. I just don’t want to see the look on his face when he first hears it”

Bakugou didn’t really understand why you were so reluctant about this, but he agreed to do it for you. If it helped you, he would do just about anything.

“Okay, but we need to do something about your room too, do you think you’re up for that?”

“I don’t really want to go back in there right now” you said.

“That’s okay. You wanna go into one of the million quest rooms you have here?”

“I think that might be a bit of an over exaggeration” you rolled your eyes. “But yeah, I think that’s a good idea”

You really didn’t want to see all the destruction you’d caused, and you felt like you would probably never go back to living in that room. You would have to move the things you hadn’t destroyed into some other room and make it into your own. Bakugou helped you up and walked you to the nearest quest room. He told you to please wait while he went to call your dad to come home, so he could tell him what had happened to you.

Bakugou closed the door to the room you were in, and dialed Endeavor.

“Hello” the Todoroki father answered the phone.

“I’m at your house, you need to come back here. Something’s happened to (Name)”

“What is it? What happened?”

“I think this conversation is best to have face to face. Just get back here old man”

“I’m on my way” Endeavor said and hung up the phone.

What could possibly have happened? The correct answer never even crossed his mind. No father wants to hear their child has gone through something bad. Bakugou had sounded very serious on the phone, so Endeavor was worried. He called his car and told the driver to get him home as soon as possible.

“What’s going on?” Bakugou heard your brother ask when he had hung up the phone.

“It’s not my place to tell you half-and-half, and you’re not going to ask your sister either. She doesn’t fucking need that right now”

“She’s my twin, I know there’s something wrong. I heard her sobbing too” Todoroki argued. Walking towards the door that Bakugou was in front of.

“You’re not fucking going in there. She’s got enough to deal with without you sticking your nose into everything” Bakugou growled and moved to be between his friend and the door.

“Move, or I’m going to make you” Shouto said coldly.

“Fucking try me” Bakugou challenged him.

“Stop it!” you yelled through the door, which made both of the guys freeze in their tracks. “I’ll talk with you later, okay Sho?”

“Are you alright?” Shouto asked, still keeping intense eye contact with Bakugou.

“No, but we can talk about it later. I’m just waiting for dad to come home so I can talk with him first”

“Okay” Shouto said and relaxed his stance, which made Bakugou also back off.

Shouto walked away, but looked over his shoulder, before turning the corner. Bakugou looked angry, very angry, but he didn’t think it was directed at him and especially not at you.

You and Shouto had always been able to tell when the other was lying, so you couldn’t just tell him everything was fine. He wouldn’t have believed that and would have gotten even more suspicious, so it was better to just be vague. You weren’t sure if you were actually going to talk to him later, but you would probably have to at some point.

When Endeavor got to the house, Bakugou was waiting for him by the front door.

“What’s happened?”

“You’re going to want to call the cops, but (Name) said she doesn’t want that. So listen and go talk to her after. You can try to tell her that calling the cops is a good idea, but I doubt she’ll listen”

“Just tell me what’s going on, boy” Endeavor said in an annoyed tone.

“She was raped by the fridge repair guy”

“Where is she?” Endeavor asked without hesitation. 

Bakugou only saw worry and anger on the old man’s face as some flames flickered near the outer corners of his eyes. He must have been furious about what had happened to you, but Bakugou still had to be sure, he wouldn't let anyone upset you more right now.

“If you’re going to yell at her, you’re not fucking going anywhere near her” Bakugou said, stepping in front of him as he reached for the front door.

Endeavor felt like he was about to explode at the young man standing in front of him, but against his instincts, he took a deep breath and attempted to calm himself down.

“I’m not going to yell at her. I’m going to talk to her” he had to force the words from between his teeth, so he wouldn’t start yelling.

“No, you’re going to fucking listen to her, and if she want’s you to, you can talk”

Endeavor just sighed and nodded, before Bakugou let him walk past him.

Endeavor was glad you had found such a protective and caring partner, but he was still your father, and he wasn’t going to do anything to hurt you or upset you.

You had been sitting on the quest room bed for about twenty minutes before the knock on the door came. You took a deep, wavering breath before saying: “Come in”

Endeavor opened the door and stepped in. He just stood there for a moment, before sitting down next to you on the bed.

“I’m so sorry” he said, and wrapped his arm around you, pulling you into a side hug.

You just started crying like a little kid, snot and tears streaming down your face as your dad held you and rubbed your upper arm. You didn’t want to cry, you wanted to be strong and not show him how broken you felt. You didn’t want to disappoint him. You’d always wanted his approval, even when you hated him for what happened with Shouto and your mother. That need was still deep in you, even though you’d tried to learn how to deal with it and grow out of it.

“I-I’m sorry dad, it-it’s my fault” you sobbed.

“No, it is not. The only one at fault here is the one who dared do this to you” he said.

Endeavor wasn’t really sure how to comfort you. He’d never dealt with anything like this so personally. Sure, he’d seen all kinds of scumbags and victims during his time as a pro-hero, but he’d never been close to anyone who something like this had happened to. He knew you had a long road to healing ahead of you, but he wasn’t sure how to help you. He wanted nothing more than to be there for you, but he was terrified of making some mistake and making it worse for you.

You just sat there for a while, as your father rubbed your upper arm and tried to comfort you. He’d never been good at talking or even really listening, but you could see he was trying.

“I know you don’t want to go to the police, but I would like you to reconsider. That man deserves to go to prison”

“I-I don’t know dad. I’ve got friends who’ve go-gone through it and I saw-I saw what it did to one of them when-when things didn’t go their way” you stumbled over your words.

“I can’t really tell you what to do, it’s your decision, but whatever you decide, I’m going to support you” he promised.

“Can I decide a bit later? I’m so tired right now…” you yawned.

“Yes, of course. I’ll come ask you again in a couple of hours, but you should rest now” he said as he got up.

You grabbed his hand as he was walking past you to leave the room.

“Dad?” you asked.

“Yes?”

“Thank you. I was honestly kind of afraid you would be angry at me”

Endeavor took a moment before answering: “I’m sorry I’ve made you feel I would react like that. It’s understandable considering how I’ve treated you in the past”

“I don’t think that really matters right now, since you didn’t react like that, but I still appreciate it” you gave him a tired smile. “I’m going to take a nap. Can you tell Katsuki to come here if he hasn’t left yet?”

“Of course” he said, before leaving the room.

Even though the situation was absolutely horrific and you were still feeling miserable, you were relieved you’d talked with your father. Now there was just Shouto to deal with. You weren’t sure if you were going to tell him. You would decide that once you knew what you were going to do with the whole police thing. You just wanted to sleep, maybe it would give you a tiny break from this horrible feeling. You just needed to wait for Katsuki to come back.

“Bakugou. She asked me to tell you to go to her” Endeavor said as he noticed the young man leaning against the wall near the front door.

“Do you think she’s gonna be okay?” Bakuogu asked as he passed the older man.

“She’s strong, but it’s going to take time” Endeavor said.

“Yeah” Bakugou muttered as he turned the corner.

Bakugou knew you were strong, but he also knew how something like this could break a person, but he has faith in you. You would get through this, even if it would take a long time, he would be there for you. You had so many people that loved you and who wanted to see you fight your way through this.

[woman-respecter]

Yo im super curious now who is that ex bestfriend that u mention on the taggs sometimes? Give us some ☕️

LMAO u have no idea how long i’ve been waiting for someone to ask me this. warning this is long and tells like. the entire story of our friendship which is probably more than u asked for haha

i’ll give the TL;DR here and the full story under the cut

TL;DR: we were best friends for about 3 years, she found out i had feelings for her, and, though she promised she would stay friends with me, ended up completely abandoning me, refusing to ever speak to me again.

ok so exbestfriend (i’ll call her R) and i became friends in my very first class of freshman year of college. we really hit it off and had like completely compatible ADHD wavelengths. i wouldn’t say we were inseprable that year bc i had other friends we spent more time with but her and I, along with another girl from our class (who was kinda insane. i’ll call her G) would spend a lot of time together. sophmore year R and i got closer and started spending a lot more time together. she was kinda my best friend at that point but also didn’t go to the play that i starred in and worked really hard on which was a minor thing but something i still remember. second semester sophomore year we got a lot closer and spent a lot more time together, often without G. middle of the semester i realized i was in love with R (i remember the exact date actually. feb 28 2020.) but youse know how 2020 was, we got sent home for covid.

during the pandemic i took a gap year and R did zoom college but she and i stayed very close in touch, facetiming and texting all the time. we even sent *handwritted letters* to eachother which i still have. in fact she was the *only* person from college who kept in touch with me then. she usually seemed too busy but tried to make time for me. during this time i fell more in love with her.

first semester my junior, R’s senior year was mostly a really good time for me (until the end which we will get to.) we were finally able to see eachother in person after over a year. G wasn’t there to third wheel because she was studying abroad. and R and i became inseparable, even deciding to take a class together (economics, which i loved and R hated). we also became part of a larger friend group which was great for me because i never had that, but still were closer with eachother than the rest of the group. we spent as much time together as possible and saw eachother almost every day. i will admit i was a little to clingy to her at times but she didn’t seem to mind. during this time she was very affectionate and caring towards me. she even did little things that made me think she may have returned my feelings like holding my hand. the other girls in our friend group seemed to believe that R may have liked me as well.

and here’s the part you’ve all been waiting for IF YOU ARE HERE FOR THE BREAKUP START READING HERE: for hanukkah i knitted her a pair of mittens, which i gave her along with a letter borderline confessing my feelings to her. after reading the letter she called me, told me she didn’t return my feelings and that in fact she now felt uncomfortable with me hugging her or telling her i loved her (as a friend) but said she would still would remain friends with me no matter what. the next day we had a convo over text where she said some pretty hurtful things which caused me to kind of act out the next time i saw her at a get together with the rest of our friends. the last time i saw her in person that semester (or, spoiler alert, ever) was when i had to beg her to drive me to the airport to go home for the semester because i could not get an uber but she only did so begrudingly (even tho before my confession of love she had planned to take me to the airport that day)

during winter break i tried reaching out to her to talk things out but she said we didn’t need to. i tried to text her about the game we both played (genshin impact haha) but she would never respond. when we got back to school i kept trying to get her to hang out with our friend group but she always said she had something going on or straight up not responding. she didn’t text me on my birthday either. eventually at the end of february, i think my other friend (who is currently my only remaining friend from that group fun fact) contacted her and told R how bad i was doing because of her absence (oh yeah i forgot to mention, i became suicidally depressed from R’s absence) so R called me and while we argued about a bunch of stuff and she was somewhat homophobic towards me (she said she was more comfortable being friends with G because G was straight) she eventually told me that yes we could be friends again she just needed more time. which i guess i was ok with but it did not stop me from being suicidally depressed.

a month later i reach out to R like hey i really miss being friends could you let me know when you want to be friends again. a WEEK after me sending that text she responds and tells me she doesn’t want to be friends ever again and says some more hurtful shit. that’s the last i’ve heard from her. i almost offed myself at this.

rest of that semester goes badly, my depression gets worse and worse to the point that i lose the rest of my friends except for one (who happens to share a name with R, a sick coincidence) because they can’t deal with it. also R blocks me on instagram and genshin impact.

my depression is a bit better now, it was super treatment resistant so i changed meds a few times. but i’m still not fully recovered from this and i never will be. all i want in life is to have her back. there is an R shaped hole in me that will never and can never be filled. i’m not sure if i’m capable of ever loving again.

so yeahhh thats it. if u read this whole thing ur insane but i love u 💖

[w3bgrl]

billie’s hair eras

a/n: eras marked with a ♡ are fan-favorite or viral hairstyles!

survival show/hellevator & i am not

debuted with a natural dark brown to go with the natural-ish colors the other members had

not the healthiest it’s ever been since she had dyed her hair in the past but it was pretty close!

juyeon said during this time that although she did like to dye her hair, she really loved natural colors on people

i am who? ♡

ariel era!

third musketeer of the redhead trio during my pace (felix & jisung)

stays lovedddd the red. she was easy to spot at events and often had other fandoms asking “who’s the girl with the red hair?”

definition of iconic

tried really hard to hide her new color and did a great job until the few days before the album release when she posted a photo that had one (1) stray hair on her shirt

i am you

back to brown!

somehow had really healthy hair this era? luscious and long and beautiful even after the red

faded into black by the end of the era

also styled her hair mostly straight this era in contrast to the ariel curls of my pace

she was soooo girlfriend during i am you era (≧∀≦)

clé 1: miroh ♡

juyeon’s favorite dye so far; the ombré

miroh also had a natural hair kinda vibe minus jeongin so juyeon got to have best of both worlds - natural color and dyed

she also got to style it really curly most of the time which was a huge plus

played a huge part of why she gained a lot of her popularity during miroh era

clé 2: yellow wood, double knot, & clé: levanter

no dye for these comebacks :(

for side effects juyeon dyed over the remnants of the ombré with a dark brown to fade into her natural color.

by double knot her hair was fully back to black. styling was usually lazy curls if not straightened.

levanter era came around and juyeon said she was getting antsy to dye her hair again. at the time she mentioned blue, pink, or another round of red. however, she actually didn’t do any of these colors next.

go live ♡

listen,

blonde juyeon stopped the space-time continuum. stay twitter was in a frenzy. you would have thought that someone died. someone probably did honestly

god tier comeback with god tier looks. god’s menu era was such a time to be alive.

after having her natural hair for the past few comebacks juyeon was so excited to be a blondie!!

stays were wondering what she’d do after the blonde as it became more brassy color by the end of this era, which is how stays were literally fed by the back door comeback

in life

blueyeon? are we kidding?

started out as a really vibrant royal blue color but as it started lightening it became more of a teal.

juyeon held on to this blue hair for as long as she could until you could almost see the bleach underneath :( she loved the blue

almost as iconic as her red hair era but just not quite there. yet you can still find blueyeon stans talking about her impact to this day

no easy & oddinary

and would you believe it or not, she went back to black.

somewhat healthy? certainly a little fried from the blonde but it was not falling out so that was a win.

she actually went back to black immediately before they went on kingdom, which is when she found out that most people agreed she had a whole different vibe with black hair.

scorpio rising queen

maxident ♡

finally!! short hair juyeon!

after years of stay begging for short hair juyeon, not only did she deliver but she served.

lots of buns off-stage in this era. something about short hair made her wanna put it up more.

it was black for 90% of this era and then one day it was brown?? cute either way!

her comment sections in this era was actually ridiculous and honestly a little cringe but stay were serious about showing their love for the bob

5 star & rock star

during 5 star her hair was a more chocolate-y color from the tail end of maxident era before she went back to black again for rock star (are we seeing the pattern here?)

while juyeon did like the short hair it was certainly just a comeback style for her and she secretly decided to start growing her hair back out the day after she cut it

during the gap between maxident and 5 star (october 2022 - june 2023) she let the bob do its thing until it hit her shoulders and then she started wearing extensions

juyeon’s hair also grows like a weed so the divide between the extensions and her natural long hair is hard to find

now in rock star era it seems that her hair is completely grown out to her usual natural color and length

[galaxyedging]

Lucien Flores x f!reader ft Dieter Bravo

Part of the Exposed Masterlist

Set in the Wardrobe Universe

WC:3.3k

Warnings: Smut. Vaginal fingering. Cum eating. Anxiety.

Summary: Lucien gets some great advice from an unlikely source.

The Big Oh

"Hey, man! Come in, just close the gate behind you. We have a rogue goat with an attitude problem. She likes to eat the neighbours grass. It's always greener, right?" Dieter was even more hyper verbal than usual. 

Truth be told, he was a little bit nervous. His wife had been encouraging him to make new friends. Dieter had no trouble making friends wherever he went. The articles written after the jobs he had were always filled with stories from his co-stars about how personable and professional he was. A long cry from the stories that they used to be filled with. His co-workers had genuine affection for him, but they were often from the other side of the country or even the world. When he wasn't working the last few years, which wasn't much, especially after that second Oscar, he was with family. His wife thought it would be nice if he had someone that he could just call to hang out with. Lucien had sprung to mind immediately when she had mentioned it over breakfast one morning. Every conversation Dieter had had with him had been enjoyable. They shared the same passion for art, for their work. Lucien had a great sense of humour. It was more subtle than Dieter's. He had a sharp wit and didn't miss a thing. That's probably why people resonated with his cartoon. He saw life as it was at its roots. The commonalities we all face. Whether we're a successful Hollywood actor or an aspiring artist.

"Can I get you a drink? Some hot? Cold? I don't drink any more but we have alcohol somewhere." Lucien looked at the clock on the wall that read 11.07. "I don't drink either, water would be good. Thanks."

Dieter disappeared out of one of the living room doors. His place was smaller than Lucien expected but it was still huge. The living room was sparsely decorated. There were two bookcases on either side of a very modern looking fireplace. Three sofas bordered a coffee table creating a little seating area. There were a couple of dressers against two walls and the third was a huge set of bifolding doors. One of them was open, allowing Lucien to hear the bleating of the goats that Dieter had mentioned. Lucien pondered the lack of personal touches as Dieter returned. He carried a tray with two bottles of water, two glasses and a bucket of ice. He set it down on the coffee table "Need anything else? Are you hungry?" 

Lucien smiled up at him, where he stood looking ready to sprint off at a moment's notice to fulfil any requests. "I'm good, thank you."

Dieter visibly relaxed. "Sorry, I'm acting weird, right? I just got all up in my head about this." Sitting down he shook his head. "I haven't made a friend, independently of my wife, since I've been sober. I've forgotten how raw everything feels when you're not high. I have this massive need to impress you."

"I feel like I'm the one that needs to impress. You're successful in your career. I'm just a guy that couldn't do what he wanted and fell into another career."

"That you are successful at and adored by so many fans for. Don't sell yourself short! And for the record, acting wasn't my first career choice. I got into it as a therapy of sorts. I worked through my angst by playing characters that got to let their's out. I wanted to be an artist too."

"I heard that you paint."

"I try to when I get a minute. Do you want to see my studio?" 

"Sure." Lucien tried not to sound too over eager. Seeing a new artist's work for the first time was always a rush for him.

Dieter led Lucien down a path, passed some goats. Some tiny pigs. Two Alpacas, that Lucien side stepped to avoid. Before coming to a small building set back in the trees. Dieter opened the door and gestured for Lucien to go first. Lucien had wondered where all the personality was in their home. He had found it. Each wall had multiple paintings hung on them. There were so many different art styles. The painting ranged from vivid and bold colourful pieces to more muted still life's. One large piece was still on the canvas, it was clearly a work in progress. The partial outline was distinctly feminine, she appeared to be naked and straddling something. The whole painting consisted of multiple vertical lines. Her outline was created by contrasting colours continuing that line. Each perpendicular colour was chosen to blur into each other. It was a vibrant piece.

"Do you like it?" Dieter asked almost shyly.

Lucien realised he'd been staring. "It's beautiful. You have a way with colour."

"Thank you. I can't take all the credit. I have a beautiful muse. That's my wife. All of the nude ones are. She let's me capture our more intimate moments as long as they aren't too explicit." As Dieter spoke Lucien looked around, his eyes lingered on an abstract piece that he reminded him of something he couldn't quite place. It was only as Dieter revealed the nature of his paintings that it became clear to Lucien that it was clearly a woman's face as she gave a blow job.

"Oh." Was all Lucien could think to say.

"Sorry. Was that an overshare?" Dieter winced.

"No, you're good. I like art with truth in it."

"Good." Dieter sighed. "So what are you painting?"

"Honestly? My love life going down in literal flames. It might be a little on the nose but it was cathartic." Lucien gave a little half laugh.

Dieter stepped forward a little. "Do you want to talk about it? The love life bit I mean?"

Lucien opened his mouth then hesitated to speak. When he took a breath instead Dieter offered him something else instead. "Hey, do you want to work on something now?" 

Dieter fetched a fresh canvas and set it up next to his. "Here." He gestured to the paints and tools on his trolley now in between the two canvases. A small paint splattered radio was on top. Dieter switched it on low. Classic music flowed from it. 

"Alright." Lucien smiled as he got to work. He let it all out his frustrations at himself. His worries, he poured it onto the canvas for a good half an hour. Even though it felt like minutes. When it really started to take shape Dieter couldn't help but make a comment. "That bad, huh?"

Lucien calmed the heavy breaths he didn't realise he had been taking. "Maybe. No, not really. My head just runs away with itself. Things were going really well and I put too much pressure on it and myself then I couldn't…" Lucien stopped himself from over sharing but Dieter just stood there patiently. Since they were standing in a room filled with paintings of his wife in various sex acts Lucien figured it wouldn't be all that shocking an admission, besides he needed some advice. "...I couldn't perform."

"Ah, so that's the reason behind Claude suddenly feeling more emotional and less horny."

"Pretty much. I saw a future beyond just sex with her and now I can't give her either. Sorry. I don't know why I'm telling you all this."

"Because I wanted you to. That's what friends are for, right? I knew something was weighing on you. Guys don't usually look that forlorn staring at my naked wife. So when you couldn't…what happened next?"

"She left. She was understanding and told me to rest. She's texted me a few times and I don't know how to respond. I've known this woman a week and I feel more for her than I have for any woman I have my entire adult life. That's crazy, right?"

"No, that's love. Or the beginnings of it. We fall in love over time because we get to know each other more. We find things in common. Quirks to love. All things we can detail but there's always that one part that we can't put our finger on. That part that makes love bigger than the sum of its parts. The thing that makes each love unique. The thing that makes you take risks for it. I think that's always there. Even in the beginning."

"Wow." Lucien breathed. "Maybe you should write the next episode. I've never thought about love like that."

"Neither did I. Then I had an incredible teacher." He looked to his canvas and smiled softly.

"I was scared to chase her off but telling her all this but I guess if it does scare her off, it wasn't meant to be. Better to be honest now than live a happy lie."

"Claude really needs that line. And you need to call her."

"You're right. Thanks, man."

"No problem. If it works out you can invite her over. We have a sex room that you can use."

Lucien's jaw went slack as he blinked at the other man.

"Now, that might have been an over share." Dieter made his way to the door. "The offer still stands though. It had a sex swing. I'll give you some privacy." As the door closed Lucien pulled out his phone. You answered on the fourth ring. "Hello?"

"Hey. Have..have you got time to talk?"

"Sure. I'd like to talk to you since you haven't answered any of my messages."

"I'm sorry. I just didn't know what to say."

"I'm sorry. I get that things can be overwhelming when you are anxious. I was just scared. I like you and I didn't know if this was over or…"

"Do you want it to be over?"

"No! No, I just thought you might be trying to peter things out."

"Shit. I'm sorry. No. I don't want to peter things out. I know it sounds crazy but I feel like there's something special here. I want to explore it."

"It's not crazy. Or it is and we're just both crazy. I want to see where things go too. Dinner tonight? My place?" 

"Yeah. I'd like that."

"I'll text you the address. I'll see you around 6.30?"

"I'll see you then. Bye."

"Bye."

He could hear the smile in your voice as you hung up.

A knock at the door sounded. "Yeah?" Lucien called.

Dieter slipped through the door carrying a white paper bag. "How did the call go?"

"Good. We're having dinner at her place tonight." Lucien could barely contain his grin.

"That's great! I made a start on lunch if you're hungry and I grabbed you a bag we give out at our sex parties. We keep those quiet nowadays. Hence the inconspicuous bag. There's a little something in there to help you along if you need it."

It was an odd gift to receive but Lucien was genuinely touched. "Thank you."

"Just be careful with the timing of those things. I took one by accident once, right before a big sex scene or so I thought..." Dieter trailed off into his memory "...actually that turned out pretty well."

Lucien raised his eyebrows in question. "It was the first time I felt like my wife really cared about me. I mean she was always caring but she was like that with everyone. This time she helped me get off so I didn't ruin my big scene. Afterwards she let me hold her. We even had a little nap together. She was so fricken cute in my arms, sleeping peacefully. I just watched her for like an hour. I should have known then that we had something special. Three years in and it still feels special."

Lunch with Dieter was great. He was a good cook. He made steak and served it with salad. He made mocktails and served apple pie that his wife had baked. The conversation was easy. A little break from his thoughts was what Lucien needed.

When he arrived at your place he felt more positive about everything, like he could keep his thoughts in check. That seemed a little less certain when you opened the door in a little sundress. The thin straps and cut of the top showed you weren't wearing a bra. The hem skimmed your mid-thigh. It should be enough to half him squirming in his tightening jeans. Yet he wasn't. One thing at a time he told himself. Firstly, he had to apologise. Then you could have a nice date. It didn't have to be about sex.

"Is this too much? I wanted to look nice. Now I'm seeing that this looks like I'm dressed for easy access. I'm not expecting anything, there's no pressure." You suddenly became self conscious. Generally you were confident but surely everyone gets nervous when they really want something. 

Lucien's hand came to cup your cheek. "You look beautiful. I know there's no pressure but I would like to pick up where we left off. Bedroom?"

Lucien saw your breathing pick up, before you led him upstairs. Once you had reached the second floor, his hands and lips were on you like they had been the first time. It was all a passionate blur as you stumbled to your bedroom. The soft mattress was at your back. Strong hands delicately remove your panties before gripping your knees placed over even stronger shoulders. Your cunt leaked as a warm tongue ran up it. Your clit pulsed at the friction of it. Lights danced behind your eyes, clearing to reveal Lucien's beautiful face hovering over yours. His chin glistening with your release. The taste on it was soon on your tongue. Lucien lay between your legs as if he was preparing to enter you. One hand kept his body up off yours. Your body prepared to take him, arousal coated your warm channel. A tingle of expectation ran through you at the thought of his cock slowly pushing inside of you. To your surprise, it wasn't his cock that slowly opened you up. It was his fingers. Two thick fingers filled you as his thumb pressed your clit. He pressed open mouthed kisses to your shoulders as he began to thrust. He rocked his whole body behind his hand, driving his fingers deep. You'd never had sex like it before. He was still close and intimate, his body moving on top of yours. His lips hovered over yours in between kisses, savouring every gasped breath across them. He was still penetrativing you deliciously deep, still making love to you, just not with his penis. Considering how liberal minded you were it struck you as odd that you'd never thought of this as sex. Whatever it was classed as, it was doing it for you. 

"Lucien. I'm gonna…" the rest was lost to a moan of his name.

His fingers gently worked you through your orgasm until you were completely wrung out beneath him. He lay on top of you dotting kisses over your warm skin. In your blissed out state it took a moment for you to recognise just how much of Lucien was pressed against you.

"Oh, you're…do you want…? I mean I could take care of you." A shyness unbecoming of a woman who just had three of a man fingers pumping in and out of her cunt came over you. 

"I'm good. I'm just glad I can get it up." Lucien huffed a laugh while he readjusted himself. "I'm worried I'll lose it if we put too much pressure on things."

"I understand. No pressure." You had  worked your way into his lap. "Thank you. That was…incredible." You sighed happily before kissing him. As the kiss got more heated you couldn't help rock your hips against him a little until…"Oh, shit." Lucien groaned, trembling between your thighs. "Fuck, I'm sorry."

"What? Oh. Oh!"

"Great. I went from not excited enough to getting way too fucking excited."

"Yeah but it's really fucking hot."

"Really?"

"Really. Can I see?"

Lucien remembered your photo request as he stood undoing his jeans. A smirk bloomed inward at your apparent kink lining up with his. As soon as he pulled down his jeans and the dark spot on his grey boxer briefs was exposed, your face lit up. "Can I clean you up?" 

There was no way he could refuse an offer like that. Your tongue lapped at his cum until he was clean and beginning to grow hard again. At that point he decided to quit while he was ahead and asked you to stop. You happily complied, swiping up the drops of him that had mixed with your saliva and escaped your mouth before pushing them back past your lips.

"Now that's the kind of energy I'd love for my art. I knew you were the perfect choice." The satisfied grin on his face made your heart flutter. 

"Stop!" You couldn't help the nervous laugh that bubbled up. He was gorgeous, smart, funny and totally into you. That combined with the hormone still running through your system was enough to make you swoon like a lovesick teenager.

"I'm going to order some pizza and get a shower. You are welcome to join me. I have some clothes that will fit you if you want to stay over?" It may have been a little presumption but you didn't want him to leave.

"I actually have an overnight bag in my car."

"Hmm? For spontaneous overnight visits?" You quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Yeah. Well, ones to the hospital."

The lightness in your heart collapsd "Oh?"

"I have a couple of conditions. They're mainly kept in check. Since Covid I've kept a bag on hand in case the worst happened. It's not a big deal. I just like to be organised."

"I'm sorry. I didn't know. Is there anything I need to do? I don't test regularly any more or…" Concern had you on your feet and standing in front of him. Searching his face as if you were able to diagnose him with just a look.

"You're good." He wrapped you in his arms. "In the early days they didn't know how Covid would affect me so as a precaution they made me stay home for longer than everyone else. I couldn't go out in public for months. As they found out more about it they relaxed the rules. I could go out but masked up. Eventually, they said if I got my vaccines I would be fine. I did end up getting covid but I was fine."

"Wow. That must have been rough."

"It wasn't too bad and now it means I get to stay over without doing the walk of shame."

"Well that makes it all worth it I guess." 

"Uh-huh." He replied, rubbing that perfectly carved nose over yours. 

The two of you stood in each other's embrace for a long while. Crazy teenager crush aside, it was nice just to be held again. Affectionate moments were few and far between nearing the end of your last relationship. When the two of you decided to part it's with one last kiss. 

With pizza order, you waited to see if Lucien wanted to take you up on that shower offer. 

"I forgot, Dieter gave me this." He placed a small white bag on the counter next to his overnight bag.

"Advice, lunch, presents. He's a keeper. What is it?"

"It said it had stuff in it to help things along in the bedroom."

"Can I look?" Lucien nodded. "Oh, wow. Vibrating cock ring. Lube. Orgasm enhancer cream. Tingle massage oil. Nipple clamps. Viagra…"

"Yeah. He mentioned that. I didn't have the heart to tell him I can't take viagra. On top of the blood condition, I have a very slight heart condition." Shock and concern crossed your face. "It's not a problem but I stay away from anything that could potentially mess with my heart."

"Is there anything else you want to casually drop on me?"

"I'm not exactly a struggling artist. Technically I'm a millionaire."

"Oh!"

@kirsteng42 @prolix-yuy @thegreenkid2 @hquinzelle @fangirl-316 @gracie7209 @jedifarmerr @doommommy @scorpio-marionette @sturkillerbase @harriedandharassed @aynsleywalker @mswarriorbabe80 @quica-quica-quica @rise-my-angel @adancedivasmom @kinda-nobody @movievillainess721 @munsonownsmyass @mandoloriancookie @faceache111 @elegantduckturtle @manazo @simpingcowboy @pedrit0-pascalit0 @yourcoolauntie @pedrostories @geekrenaissance

[introverted-werido360]

The Wall

Main tags: Fma, oc x canon, hurt/comfort, vaguely based off of the song The Wall by Yana.

Tw: there's mention of alcohol and drugs but its just cigarettes.

Dividers made by: 2024 © 𝘁𝗼𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘆 and saradika-graphics

"I don't belong here", was the only thing on Lyre's mind as she watched her friends and colleagues all interact with smiles and laughter, the smell of alcohol and cigarettes permeated through the warm night air as they bantered and argued over a game of poker.

It was supposed to be a celebration, of the lives that were saved after the promise day and in celebration of the lives of those that were lost. It had only been a couple of years after the fated day and yet that alone warranted a party at the local bar. She'd join them if she could however, she was far too busy hiding away in the corner of the room avoiding the real reason she came here.

She had done a good job of staying out of sight for the most part, keeping her attention on the people she had come to know as colleagues argue about strategies and sheer luck. Yet she'd catch her eyes drifting to the middle of the room, the center of attention, it was hard not to with the way the light bounced off his hair it made the yellow shine like gold in a sea of bronze and coal. Not to mention that smile everytime someone praised him or said something that made him laugh, it was hard not to see him.

This had been going on for about an hour or two, it was hard to tell what with all the alcohol and caffeine pumping through her veins. When she finally came to notice herself staring she would drift her eyes down at the half empty glass, the third one she's had so far, watching as the auburn liquid swished around as she moved the glass around in her hand.

She had just begun the lift the glass towards her lips when her eyes drifted again before stopping dead in its tracks, those same golden eyes that was stuck on the cards in his hands were on her. With the glass just inches away from her lips she couldn't help but stare back, the idea of looking away seemed blasphemous. It felt like everything else had faded away and they were the only two people in the room, so many emotions happening at once until finally his attention was drawn elsewhere albeit hesitantly. She could feel her heart in her chest beating against her ears, she debated whether she should stay or run. She got close to the latter until finally getting up, downing her drink before rushing to bathroom.

Was it cowardly? Probably, but she'd rather be called a coward than make trouble for the others, for him. She had stood in front of the door for a minute as she catched her breath, she took off her jacket as it had only gotten warmer the second she walked in before walking over to the mirror once she had deemed herself as calm enough. The first thing she noticed was the uniform she wore, finding it almost laughable that a military officer was afraid of making herself known.

The next thing she noticed was her face, how her eyes had bags that even a mole could see, the scars that decorated her face forever as a reminder of her past detriments, and finally those eyes, the same ones as the people this country had failed to protect.

She was anything but what the people of Amestris would've envisioned as "the perfect soldier", her past actions would state otherwise. He couldn't see her like this, after what she did. She couldn't afford anyone to feel remorse for her, let alone pity. But she couldn't hide from her past mistakes either, even if she believed it was it was the right thing to do at the time.

Lyre closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, exhaling only after she had made her final decision.

She walked out of the bathroom, jacket in hand and scanned the room and began to make her quiet decent from the bar. She figured that it was safer if she had just left, save the pain and awkward conversations for a normal day not a day of celebration.

Which is what should've happened if the second she hadn't stepped through that door and she heard from the right of her a familiar voice...

"Going somewhere?"

She practically stopped her foot in midair when his voice had reached her ears, she slowly turned to look towards the source as if it would prepare her for what was to come.

There he was, leaning against the wall with his arms folded and head down. She could practically feel the anger in his eyes before seeing them, although it didn't prevent it from hurting any less then it would if she just hadn't seen at all. The air felt heavy as he pushed himself off the wall and walked forward towards her, stopping just enough to keep them a few feet apart. They stood there for a moment in complete silence, the look in his eyes was enough to warrant any previous thoughts in Lyre's head from coming out, she felt like a child being reprimanded by a teacher until a sigh broke the silence.

"What, was calling to much of hassle for you?" He chastised, his words feeling like daggers as he watched her face closely for any type of reaction, a look, a quiver, even just a twitch. Yet she was completely still, just looking down with tired eyes.

"No phone call, a mention, couldn't even do it person, just that's it."

She balled her fists into her jacket, her face completely still as she looked off into the street, closing her eyes when it got to be too much to handle.

"You wait until I'm overseas to send a letter and then act as if i don't exist, you avoid me when i try to talk to you, let alone see you...Look at me!"

She flinched only closing her eyes tighter, her grip on her jacket tightening from the mixture of emotions running through her mind.

"I, can't."

It's quiet, strained at best and wavering in between composed and breaking completely.

"Why?"

She stayed silent, biting her tongue and gripping her jacket out or fear she might spill over. He looked on in disbelief scoffing before looking down at the ground, the small puddles of beer and concrete mixed underneath his shoes as he bawled his fists trying to ignore the burning sensation behind his eyes.

"Did...Did you hate that mu.."

"No!"

He barely got the words out before she interrupted him, the shout seemingly catching both of them off guard. They stared at each other for a moment, eyes wide before she looked away again.

They stood in silence, letting the wind carry on their conversation until finally he turned away unable to tale the silence any longer. He debated whether to just leave without another word and end it here, but deep down he knew that he couldn't because to him there was still something to save...

"I'm staying at the hotel nearby, show up or don't, It doesn't matter to me anymore."

He huffed, exhaustion weighing heavy on his voice as he placed his hands in his pockets a walked away, she had half the mind to follow after him and half to stay.

She chose the safer option and walked in the opposite direction.

Lyre laid there in bed with her arm over her eyes, still in uniform with her jacket on a chair and half a bottle of Kirsch on the bedside table next to her. She debated with herself, go or stay, if she stayed then it was definitely over and as much as she wanted to convince herself that it was the right thing to do, she couldn't change what her heart wanted and there was a chance that if she went there she could save this, reverse the decision and be selfish for once.

She's not an optimist, quite the opposite but even she had hopes and desires. And idea of trading those in for a life of servitude to a country that has failed her people time and time again, even if it's to protect those around her, sounding like hell without him there. Before she knew it she was already out the door, barely taking the time to button up her jacket. Stopping when she was halfway down the street to catch her breath, placing her hand on the wall as the alcohol she had consumed finally hit, although that wasn't enough to deter her as she let the cold air hit her face waiting for her mind stabilize before pushing herself off of the wall swaying for a moment before continuing forward.

She stopped at the large building, the words hotel plastered so blatantly on the front that she wondered for moment if she was at the right place. It was fancy enough for someone with no money, but that didn't matter right now to Lyre what mattered was getting to him or atleast trying to as trying to look for his room without knowing the number was going to be...difficult.

It took much longer then she had anticipated as the person at the desk was a lot more stubborn than she initially thought, however they were willing to overlook this over a small fee and a promise to "not make too much noise".

So, with a slightly less intoxicated mind and a lighter wallet Lyre made her way upstairs. Each step felt heavier then the last as the weight of what she was doing slowly hit her in waves, that little voice in her head getting louder and louder telling her to leave before its too late, yelling, screaming at her to go before she causes more trouble and she had half a mind to listen. But she couldn't, she was already so close and she was tired of running away.

By the time she hade made it to his floor it was completely dark save for a window at the end of the hallway, she could feel the guilt and fear weighing heavy on her shoulders, thoughts of doubt and distrust flooded her mind as she got closer and closer, but she pushed through not just for him but for as well.

It was quiet on the otherside, she knew it was late but she couldn't go back now, not after she come so far. Her arm felt heavy as she raised it, feeling the shame, guilt, and fear get stronger until finally she knocked.

She stood there for what felt like hours but was only mere minutes in complete silence, slowly thay doubt started to creep in.

"You're too late, he's probably asleep." She thought to herself, she exhaled shakily as she braced herself to leave.

Until she heard the doorknob turn, watching as the door opened and the light nearly blinded her. His hair was down yet he was still wearing the same clothes he was wearing at the bar, his face looked redder then normal as he stared at her with his eyes wide seemingly just as surprised as she was.

He stepped back and let her in, the only source of light being a lamp on a desk and half an empty bottle of what looked to be cognac and an empty glass. The bed was a messily cleaned up with blankets thrown on and the pillows slightly misshapen, she turned around to face him as he closed the door behind him standing not necessarily against it but in front of it with his arms folded. He looked at her with narrowed eyes and a slight frown, waiting.

Lyre slowly felt that feeling of guilt and shame creeping back in as she raised her hands,

"I don't have an excuse, nothing i say will excuse my actions." Her hands faltered as she thought about the best way to express her reasoning.

"The truth is i was scared, scared of how i felt around you like i was safe. I was scared of getting too attached because it felt like it was inevitable that you would disappear and i can't..." she paused, her trembling as she the shame flowed throughout her body like a heavy current. She kept her eyes down afraid that if she were to look up, it would only confirm her fears. Without thinking whether it had been the alcohol or the guilt she slowly fell onto her knees and with her hands digging into the fabric of her pants as tears began to fall down her cheeks.

"I can't take that again."

Her voice was soft and strained, a result of years of unuse. She closed her eyes in an effort to stop the flow but it had only made it worse, she hadn't noticed him getting on her level instead taking the slience as rejection and doing her best to stay quiet hoping that it would eventually pass until she felt hands cup her face and gently wipe away the tears.

When she opened her eyes Edward was there with a solemn expression, he didn't have to say anything she already knew and at that point she didn't bother trying to stop the tears instead she let them flow. Sobbing as his lips pressed against her forehead before holding her close resting his head above hers, she wrapped her arms around him tightly as she cried into his chest.

For once in what felt like years, she felt like she was allowed to feel safe.

[nowandajenn]

Blue Christmas- chapter 10

Summary: After almost three years of marriage, everyone would tell you that Chris and his wife Kelly are the most stable, solid couple they know. But behind closed doors, things are tense as they keep trying for a baby, to no avail. When a secret threatens to shake their solid marriage to it’s core, will they be able to pick up the pieces?

Series warnings: angst (like a lot), mentions of infidelity, language, family drama, pregnancy, sexual situations.

Author’s Note: I do not consent to have my content, whether it be this story or anything else of my creation, posted by a third party on any other platform other than right here without my permission. This blog is 18+ and is not intended for minors. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Heed the warnings.

Anesthesia is a warm, heavy blanket covering me from head to toe that makes it impossible to want to climb out from under of. My limbs feel like they weigh a thousand pounds, and my head is full of cotton wool. People are talking around me, but everything sounds distorted, like I’m underwater. There’s an itch under my nose, but the thought of lifting my arm to scratch is seems like an insurmountable task. 

I feel a huge, warm hand wrapped around my much smaller one, their thumb running soothingly over the skin on the top of my hand. God, that feels nice. Soft, slightly chapped lips press lightly against the pulse point on the inside of my wrist, and I immediately know that it’s Chris sitting next to me. I’m safe. As long as he’s here with me, I’m okay. I’m okay. With that thought in my head, I allow myself to drift a little bit deeper into the abyss. 

Chris sits next to the bed, unable to take his eyes off you in case something happens. It’s been about an hour since you were moved from recovery to your private room, and he’s been sitting next to you the whole time, willing you to open your eyes. 

The nurse that’s in the room taking your vitals stops and starts entering information into the laptop on her cart. 

“Is she doing okay?” Chris asks, swallowing hard. He’s not used to this. He’s not used to feeling so out of control. He’s not used to seeing you laying unconscious and broken in a hospital bed. He’s desperate for reassurance that you’re going to be okay.

“She is.” the nurse tells him. “She’s probably going to be in and out of consciousness today between the anesthesia and the pain medicine, and that’s perfectly normal. As long as her vitals stay stable and she’s not having any trouble breathing on her own, things are good.”

“Okay.” he breathes. He looks down at his cell phone that’s sitting in his other hand, debating on whether or not he really wants to do this. According to Meghan, someone had covertly taken pictures in the hospital waiting room of Chris and your families and posted them online, prompting rumors to start swirling around. She had told him it might be better to address it and set the record straight about what was going on than to let people get started with wild assumptions. 

“Hey man, how’s Kelly doing?” Josh asks. 

“She’s still out of it. Listen, I don’t want to leave the hospital if I can help it, and I was wondering if you could run by the house really quick and grab some stuff for me.” Chris tells him. 

“Sure, just let me know what you need.” 

“My phone charger, definitely. A couple of changes of clothes for me, and a change of clothes for her. They had to cut off her clothes when they brought her in, so she doesn’t have anything. Her coat got trashed when they were pulling her out of the car……” he stops and takes a deep breath, trying to get his emotions under control. 

“Listen, don’t worry about it. I got you guys. I’ll be there as soon as I can. I’ll go ahead and take Dodger out and feed him while I’m there.”

“Thanks, man.”

Chris hangs up the phone and sighs, running his hand over his beard. 

“So, how long did it take you to come up with this plan?” Connor asks from his seat on the other side of my bed. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“This. The canceling everything you’ve got going on, the whole loving, concerned husband thing. What do you think? You think she’s going to get out of here and go back home with you and everything is going to be fine? You’ll take care of her and she’ll just decide to forget about the fact that you cheated on her, and she’ll just forgive you and you’ll live happily ever after? Is that it?”

“Will you give it a goddamn rest? Look, you’ve made it abundantly clear that you hate me and you think my guts would look great decorating your wall, but seriously…..just……”

A small groan makes them both turn their attention to me. 

“Kelly? Honey?” Chris whispers. 

“Will you two….knock it off? Please? My head…..” I groan softly. For some reason, my throat feels raw and tender, like I just spent the last day screaming my head off for no reason.

“I’ll go see if I can find her nurse.” Connor says, getting up from his chair. 

Chris scoots his chair a little closer to my bed, and brings my hand up to his lips. 

“Hey, sweetheart. Can you open your eyes for me?” 

I groan softly, turning my head to the side. With a monumental effort, I crack my eyes open a little bit, only to close them right away against the bright sunlight streaming into the room. 

“Too bright.” 

Chris gets up to pull the drapes shut a bit, and Connor and my nurse walk into the room. 

“Good morning, Mrs. Evans. My name is Andi; I’m your nurse. How are you feeling?” 

“Hurts.” I rasp. 

“That’s to be expected. Can you do me a favor and open your eyes for me, so I can check your pupils?” she asks. 

I scrunch my face in distaste but slowly open my eyes again, pleased that the room is a little dimmer. The nurse shines a flashlight in my eyes, checking my pupils, and then putting it away in the pocket of her scrubs. 

“Very good. We have a respiratory therapist outside, and he’s going to give you something to drink and a little snack so he can check your swallowing. You had a tube in your throat for the surgery, and he just wants to make sure that everything is okay with your throat. While he’s doing that, I’m going to go ahead and page your doctor so she can come in and talk to you. Okay?” 

I nod softly, wincing at the pain in my neck. 

Chris and Connor stand off to the side, out of the way, while the therapist tests my swallowing. The heavy, drowsy feeling starts to wear off a bit, and I start to become a little bit more aware of what’s going on. My left arm is heavily wrapped and in a black sling across my chest, and there’s a hot pink cast on my left leg from my foot to my knee. My ribs ache, and I can feel a bandage on my stomach. The oxygen tube up my nose and the IV bags hanging on the pole behind the bed are the final touches that let me know that whatever happened was pretty serious. 

The doctor comes in right after the respiratory therapist leaves, and she introduces herself as she shakes my good hand gently. 

“Mrs, Evans, it’s good to meet you. I’m Dr. Richards. I’m the one that admitted you when you were brought in this morning.” she says. 

“Hi.” I say softly. I squeeze my eyes shut, knowing that I’m about to hear news that’s going to severely impact my life for the forseeable future, and I’m not ready. The monitor attached to my finger picks up my increased heart rate as I slowly start to spiral into panic mode, and the monitor next to me starts beeping more intensely. 

“Mr. Evans, Mr. Sullivan, why don’t you give us a few minutes alone to talk? Go ahead and let your families know that Kelly is awake. I promise to let you know as soon as we’re done.” 

I look over at Chris with tears in my eyes, and I can tell that he doesn’t want to leave, but he also doesn’t want to overwhelm me with so many people being in the room. 

“I’ll be right back, okay? I promise.” he tells me, dropping a kiss to my forehead. 

Once the door closes behind Chris, Dr. Richards pulls the chair next to my bed closer and sits down as I start to fidget with the sheet that’s covering me. 

The next time I blink my eyes open, the drapes in the room have been opened again, and by the position of the sun and the shadows in the room, I’ve been out for a few hours. After speaking with the doctor and getting the full picture of my injuries and what my recovery was going to look like, along with some other news, a panic attack had set in and the doctor had ordered medication to calm me down, which also knocked me out almost immediately. 

I groan softly as the pain in my body settles in, and I look over to my right, expecting to see Chris, but I’m met with the sight of my mother. 

“Hey. How do you feel?” she asks. 

“Like I went head to head with a brick wall and lost.” I croak out. My throat is so damn dry and sore still. 

I point to the pitcher and cup on the overbed tray, and she gets up to pour me a cup of water, holding the straw to my lips so I can drink. 

“Where’s dad?” I ask. 

“He and Connor went back home to drop Olivia off. She was getting a little antsy. I’m going to go ahead and tell dad to go ahead and clean up your old room and get it all ready for you for when you get out of here.” 

I turn to look at her, confusion clouding my mind. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“You’re going to need someone to take care of you when you get out of here. You’ve got a long way to go before you can take care of yourself.” she tells me. 

“And you, what? You think I’m going to come back home and let you do it?” I ask incredulously. Oh Lord Jesus, this must be some sort of nightmare I fell into…..

“Kelly, you’re going to need help. You’re a mess right now. Chris said he had cancelled everything on his schedule for the next couple months, but are you really going to make him do that to take care of you? He has so many important obligations….and honestly, since Connor told us you’ve been staying with him, I didn’t think that you’d want to go back home right away.”

“So, you don’t REALLY want to take care of me, and help me heal. You’re offering out of obligation. Because you think my husband is too important and too busy to take care of me. Am I getting this right?” I ask, getting angrier by the second. 

“Kelly…..”

“No. Absolutely not. You didn’t even want to take care of me when I was a kid, when it was your goddamned job. You haven’t made it a secret my whole life that I was unwanted. You had Colleen, and then you were going to have one more, and you were done. But then one turned into two. I was the bonus baby that you got stuck with. The extra that was always too much trouble. You make me feel like a fucking inconvenience at every turn, even now. And it’s not enough for you to make me feel like I’m an inconvenience to you, but like I’m one to my husband too. Maybe that’s why he cheated on me. That, and the fact that I couldn’t give him a baby. What do you think?” I ask, my breath hitching in my chest and tears filling my eyes. The heart monitor starts beeping rapidly, signalling my distress. 

“Honey, that’s not-”

“Get the fuck out. I don’t want you here. I don’t want to see you.” I sob out, all of my emotions crashing down on me at once. 

The nurse runs in with Chris hot on her heels just in time to see me pick up the small water pitcher and throw it at my mom. 

“Get out!” I scream. 

Chris stops my mom just outside of my room. “That’s it. I’m done watching you hurt her. I’ve watched it for years, and I haven’t said shit because I felt like it wasn’t my place. But this is my place now, between you and her. I don’t know what the hell you said to her, but you’re not going back into that room. You’re not going to see her unless she explicitly says that SHE wants to see YOU. Until that happens, you’re not going to come near her.”

Chris walks back into the room to see the nurse next to your bed, checking the incisions on your stomach to make sure that you didn’t pull any sutures. There’s two medium size incisions from where they took your spleen laparoscopically, raw and freshly stitched, and seeing them makes Chris almost burst into tears. 

“I know this is rough, and I know you’re in pain and you’re hurting, but if you don’t calm down, we’re going to have to sedate you. You’re going to hurt yourself even more if you’re not careful.” Andi tells me. 

“Go ahead! That’s the best fucking idea anyone’s had yet today!” I practically growl. 

She just quirks an eyebrow at me, a small smirk gracing her features as she tries not to laugh at my spitfire attitude. 

Once she gets done checking me over and changing out two of the bags of medicine I’m hooked up to, she takes her leave, telling me and Chris to call if we need anything. 

I look at Chris and we just stare at each other for a few minutes, neither one of us knowing what to say. He doesn’t know what to say to reassure me or comfort me. I’m afraid if I open my mouth to say anything to him, the news the doctor told me will fall from my lips and be out in the world, unable to be taken back. And I’m not ready to face that yet. I can barely wrap my own mind around it. 

“We ran a ton of labs on you when you came in, which is normal for trauma cases. When we got the reports back, we found something. Your hcG levels are high. A lot of women have low levels of the hormone even if they’re not pregnant, but your levels indicate that you are. Looking at the numbers, it looks as if it’s very early, probably only a few weeks. A normal pregnancy test wouldn’t pick it up because the levels aren’t quite high enough to show up on a test, but the labs don’t lie.”

“That’s…..no. That’s not right. We haven’t even had……” My mind is working ten to a dozen, trying to focus and make sense of what I’m hearing. 

“Two weeks ago. But that’s too soon. It wouldn’t show up yet.”

“In early pregnancy, hcG levels double every two to three days. We’ll keep an eye on your levels while you’re here, and you should make an appointment to see your OBGYN in a few weeks.” she tells me. 

A broken sob works its way up through my throat. 

“We’ve been trying….trying to have a baby….for over a year……and then my husband…..he cheats on me, and I end up pregnant. Isn’t that…..isn’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?”

[sweetbillwriting]

Love Just Happens

Before It Happend (Additional Prologue)

Description: Bill and Aurora Lou are made for each other, right?

But what was it like before they found each other? Why did Bill and the mother of his children break up? And why did Aurora have such an easy time giving a 40-year-old dad of three a chance?

Characters: The future's Bill Skarsgård and others close to him. The rest is my own characters.

Setting: This story is set in the future but because it's hard to say how the world is then (and it isn't that important for the story) the future is similar to our time now, even with fashion and so on.

Warnings: 18+, age difference, ageism, toxic relationships, mentions of sex, masturbation, alcohol, drugs, sexual harassment, abuse, bullying, mentions about rape, family problems, cheating.

Notes: Thanks to @b-afterhours I got feeling and wrote a prologue! Have in mind that Aurora is just 22 in the beginning of this.

Bill Skarsgård looked around at the people surrounding him. In every angle he looked at, his view was full of summer dressed people, laughing and talking. Bill himself didn't even smile for the moment. He loved Stockholm, it would always be his only home but right now Stockholm felt like the most boring place on earth.

"Bill? Bill?" Said his girlfriend who sat in front of him at the table. He gave her a distant look while hugging his beer bottle in his hands.

"Are you happy with your birthday so far?" She asked but she didn't smile. She probably knew he wasn't. Bill smiled a little but was quite sure it didn't reach his eyes.

"Yeah, of course. Of course." He nodded to himself and looked at the beer bottle. The sticker had a bit of a wrinkle he scratched with his thumb nail. His girlfriend didn't say anything more, just looked after the others that would finally join their night. The tragic truth was that they no longer had anything to talk about.

It was his 38th birthday and the two of them had been together more than twelve years now. Twelve. When they had it good he was impressed and proud of their many years together. Now when he tasted it in his mouth he instead thought about how many of those years that had actually been passionate between them. Of course it had started well between them. He had liked how easy it was to be around her, that she didn't make a thing of his fame and he loved how independent she was, she never whined about his schedule and could occupy herself with friends and activities. It felt natural to have her by his side but passion was not a word belonging in their relationship. They had kids quite fast. As stupid as it sounds, it came as a surprise to him even if they had always been careless with protection. Their sex life had no rhythm because of his schedule so it also became irresponsible and lazy. He loved the baby as soon as he saw her. He loved the second and third one too, just as much. He had never planned to be a father of three before he had become forty but there wasn't really much in his life that was planned. It had just happened.

Finally he saw his friends come into the restaurant's outdoor seating, joining him and his girlfriend by the table. Finally he had someone to talk with. He stood up to signal to them where they were and smiled a big silly smile. His girlfriend looked at him standing tall, tanned and fit, waving his arms in a silly manner. He was dressed in a short sleeved shirt that hugged his biceps, it hung quite open and showed off the smooth golden chest. Even if they otherwise were rarely intimate with each other she walked up to him to button two buttons. He looked down at her a bit annoyed, both that she took the liberty to just correct his outfit like she wanted to but also because she now stood just in front of him when his friends came up to them.

When Bill hugged and said hello to his friends she stood a bit awkwardly next to them. She had known most of them as long as she had been together with Bill but when her and Bill's relationship grew cold, so did also the relationship with his friends.

Bill looked at her when he saw her being awkward and gave her a small smile. He wasn't in love with her anymore and had probably not been for a long time. Their relationship was mostly about co-parenting but she was still important to him. He didn't want her to feel left out. When they sat down he dragged out a chair for her so she would feel included but she could also see his wandering eyes. His big eyes were telling and she could see how he looked at girls' short skirts and bare shoulders. Girls ten years younger than her. It had become more and more obvious she was older than him and that he still was one of Stockholm's most attractive men while she couldn't keep up. She took his hand in her hand and hugged it hard but Bill, who was joking around with his friends, just let her go without looking at her. It wasn't a malicious act but said a lot about their relationship. She was trying to hold him down but he was breaking free. He needed more than she could give him and it got harder and harder for him to restrain that need.

He felt a need later that night, when they made themself ready for bed. They haven't had sex for months. He gave her a fast look where she sat on the edge of the bed in a black nightgown. There was no erotism in the air even if she was dressed in so little and he was on his way to strip off to boxers. He could feel she looked at him when he walked to the bathroom but couldn't say in what way she looked at him. He was in great shape, keeping it up since a movie role so she should think he was attractive but he didn't know anymore and the bigger question was if he cared. It wasn't like she created wild lust in him. He wanted sex but she wasn't really the person he wanted to have it with. There was never passion between them, all sexual tension gone.

His girlfriend didn't feel exactly the same thing but she didn't want to have sex with Bill either. He was in great shape. The boxers sat tight and low on his hips. He was tanned from vacations and early breakfasts in the sun. She looked at the veins crawling down from his biceps to his hands. He was a masterpiece, maybe he had never even looked that good but when she looked at him she knew she just had him on loan. It was just painful having him close when he more or less had one foot out of the door.

They crawled down next to each other in silence. Bill turned his lamp off at once while she moisturized her lips with lip balm again before turning her lamp off. The silence was thick between them but they were used to it now. They really didn't have anything to say.

"Goodnight," she said and turned her back to Bill.

"Goodnight…"

He didn't close his eyes but instead laid and looked up at the ceiling until he believed she had fallen asleep.

How long ago was it he got a blowjob? He couldn't even remember the last time. She hadn't wanted to do anything else more fun in years. She maybe didn't feel like they needed such things anymore but he felt like he got dirtier by day. He could probably use hours to just eat pussy. He missed the taste and wondered how other girls tasted, smelled. A younger, tighter… He shouldn't think like that but it made him put a hand down his boxer and pull his erect cock harshly.

"Can you please not do that while I'm next to you?" Said his girlfriend suddenly and it made Bill stop at once. He wasn't really embarrassed, more disappointed. He couldn't even jerk off.

×××

The dance floor was crowded by people. Lights in bright orange and hot pink flashed over the dancing bodies. Some of them move sensually against each other, others wildly, affected by too much alcohol. But alcohol wasn't everyone in the Los Angeles club's favored drug, much heavier stuff was shared from hand to hand openly in front of the staff and guards. For these people there were no rules, everything was just games and play.

Aurora Lou Isaac stood in the middle of the dance floor, dancing sensually with her hands in the air. She danced by herself with closed eyes and let the music be her only company. She was out with her boyfriend, Philip and some of their friends. Or rather his friends. They celebrated that her new album was out and two of the songs had been placed on Spotify’s top 50 the same day. She had thought he would invite her friends but instead of her girlfriends and the songwriters he had invited his own friends, guys that mostly made her nervous. When two arms snuck around her waist she smiled with happy surprise. Philip rarely wanted to dance. His hands dragged over her hips and down to her ass. Moving them upwards so her short skirt followed with the motion. If he hadn't stood just behind her she would have shown everyone her ass, ill concealed in thongs. She giggled and laid her head back, prepared to feel his shoulder against her head but instead she met a chest. Her smile died down at once. It wasn't Philip behind her but a taller guy, dressed in a white tank top.

"Fuck you're sexy…" he whispered and that made her turn around. It was one of Philip's friends, a wannabe rapper guy that had tried several times to force her to work with him.

"Can you just let me be?" Said Aurora with an insecure voice and pulled down her skirt. He smirked and shrugged his shoulders.

"Sure okay, but don't come to me when someone has raped you, even Philip can see how much you ask for it." He shrugged his shoulders again like he had given her a friendly advice and then walked towards the bar. Aurora looked around at the people. She was ashamed of what he had said and started to wonder if it was true. It always started like this when she was out with Philip and his friends. She felt really pretty, successful and talented in the beginning of the night then it died down. She just wanted to go home now. Maybe even her mom would still be up just to drink a cup of tea with her.

"Why are you standing here?? I've looked everywhere for you! Fuck!"

Philip had snuck up on her with waving hands and blown out pupils. Aurora looked down and saw him holding her phone. The case had a picture of her dogs so it was obvious it was hers.

"Can I have my phone?" She shouted over the loud music and stretched out her hand, Philip just moved his arm away.

"I'll take care of it for you! But where have you been??" He shouted again and looked at her up and down then at the surrounding people.

"I've been here! I've just danced! By myself!"

Philip rolled his eyes and then started to walk with long strides. He wasn't that tall so she could have easily walked at the same speed if it wasn't for her heels. They were both stilettos and had a high platform but the worst was that they glided on the floor so if she took too long strides she would slip.

"Philip!" She shouted after him while feeling people's eyes on her. She had just started to get used to that, how even celebrities stared at her. She felt a hand drag over her bum while she walked by but didn't have time to react, or energy. Her body didn't feel like her own in the same way anymore.

Outside of the club stood Philip smoking with some of his friends, one of them was the guy in the tank top. Philip looked at her sourly but pretended to laugh when one of his friends lifted her up like she was their shared toy.

"Put me down!" She screamed and pushed the guy's chest. He had taken the moment to sneak up a hand under her skirt and she could feel his fingers scary close to her core.

"You're such a fucking prude!" Said the guy and put her down but gave her a hard slap on the ass. Aurora rolled her eyes and looked at Philip that still held her phone.

"I think I will go home now. Please, babe, can I have my phone?" She said calmly and sweetly to Philip. She knew she needed to be the girlfriend he wanted for him to listen.

"How will you get home?" He asked and dragged her phone between his fingers.

"I’ll call someone." She shrugged her shoulders. She knew it wasn't safe for her to wait in a corner for a car to pick her up but she didn't feel safe with Philip and his friends either.

"Do you really need your phone then?"

Aurora made a sound of offense.

"What do you mean with that? Just give me the phone!" She said irritated, tired of trying to be the sweet girlfriend.

"Like you will fucking get it now when you act like that!" He said angrily while his friends laughed like they saw a funny sketch.

"Take it then! Asshole!" Aurora started to trip away on her high heels while people looked at her long hair caught in the wind and her hips seductively swaying. She was the hottest girl there and everyone knew it. Philip looked around at the people watching his girlfriend then he ran after her.

"Rora! Rora!" He screamed after her with a whiny voice until she turned around. He stretched out her phone to her but pulled it back when she was on her way to take it.

"Come home with me. I promise I will be nice." He looked at her with dark eyes under the eyebrow tattoo and his black wild hair and she sighed. She really just wanted to go home, to her parents, her dogs, her warm fluffy socks but it was better to make up with Philip so he could be that nice guy he could be again.

They took a car home to his apartment and she let him drag her dress off as soon as they had come in through the door. Of course he was horny and she didn't mind it. Or not that much. She wasn't that sexual. She never really understood the hype and she was quite sure a guy would never be able to make her come. Philip laid between her legs a few minutes before he came and then he laid his sweaty face on her chest.

"Fuck, I love you so much sweety. You know that right?" He said while playing with one of her nipples. Aurora looked down at him and smiled.

"I love you too. You make me so happy…"

She said it with a distant voice because she wondered if it still was true. He had made her happy but now there were fewer and fewer of those moments.

×××

Bill's suitcase stood packed in the hallway waiting on him. It was a sight his daughters were used to seeing, it showed up there four, five times a year. He would go away to Canada for filming and even if he didn't want to say it out loud, it was just what he needed. He needed to meet new people and do something really creative, not just be a stay at home dad. But it was also the perfect timing for him and the mother of his children to separate. When he was away they would get used to her being the only parent in the apartment and he could just move in somewhere else.

"Your dad and I… We still love each other…" their mother began to explain but Bill gave her a look. He didn't think they should lie for the kids.

"We still love you. We will always love you, but me and your dad don't…" Her voice died down and she looked down at her hands. Bill looked at his daughters, even the little one that sat on the floor, playing with duplo blocks. He could see that they knew. They didn't need the lies.

"Me and your mother will not live together anymore. It has nothing to do with you, it's just that we will be happier apart and that will make us better parents."

He said it much more crass and he felt his ex's eyes on him.

"But where will we live?" Asked his oldest who was ten and probably mostly worried about her room.

"Your mom will live here while I must find something else. Close, of course. And you will get two rooms." He smiled a little. His oldest daughter nodded while his middle daughter and the youngest didn't look so interested at all. They were probably too young to really understand.

Later that night Bill pulled on his leather jacket and boots to go out to the taxi to Arlanda airport. Even if it was in the beginning of October it was still not that cold so he let his coats stay in Sweden.

"I just must ask…" said his ex while standing and looking at him. Their kids were asleep so they could talk freely.

"I know this is a bigger thing to discuss with a lawyer when you get home but… Like, will you transfer money to our account now? I noticed the credit card didn't work…"

Bill pretended to be occupied with checking something on his phone. He had locked the credit card. He had had the thought for weeks, since they had decided to separate but it wasn't until now that he had done it. He wasn't petty, of course he would give her money but to have free access to his money was a benefit for a girlfriend. He didn't want to even think it but somewhere inside him he also wanted to mess with her a bit, for having taken his providing for granted.

"I will transfer money to you. I promise." He just said and put his phone in the back pocket of his jeans.

"Good… Good…" she said but Bill noticed she wasn't totally pleased, but he didn't need to please her anymore.

Bill took a breath of relief in the taxi and leaned his head back. He would use his time alone to think about his future. What did he want with the future? And how is it to be single? He really was single now. Would he date? He didn't really feel like it and when he tried to see himself with another woman other than his ex they were all scarily alike her. It was not an uplifting thought that he would just get together with a woman just like his ex but to be honest he didn't really know if he could get someone else, another type. He was starting to get old, he was a dad of three and was a bit funny looking. Did he even want something else? He liked brunettes, long legs… What did he like? He hasn't had sex in such a long time he didn't know if he even needed it. He never had any girl that occupied his mind so when he jerked off the girls were faceless, maybe even bodiless. It was just holes, wetness, a feeling. For a moment he just thought about sex. He could get that now. He could get himself a one night stand the next night. But how?

"You called it pillow talk… Pillow talk… But it was so much more… Oh… between my silky sheets you want to come close… Pillow talk, for pillow talk…"

The pop song playing on the radio got stuck on his brain and he continued to hum it even when he walked out from the taxi. He didn't really know who the female artist was, he had probably heard songs with her before but didn't have interest to know more than that. But now the song got caught in his brain and didn't disappear until he started to listen to his own music on the plane.

×××

She sat in just her short pleated skirt by two lamps, directed in her face. A fan stood next to them and made her long flowing hair to move. A photographer set up close while she covered her chest modestly with her hands. Everywhere people stood and stared at her. She had never really understood why so many people were there to just stare but just some minutes ago her make-up artist Erica said that they just wanted to watch her, there was no other reason. She guessed it maybe was a compliment but Erica also understood it was just uncomfortable.

"Maybe we can take a break?" Shouted Andrew, her manager, suddenly and Aurora looked at him confused. She finally started to relax and get comfortable sitting topless with fifteen people looking at her.

Behind him walked a person who's face Aurora knew every detail of, dressed in an oversized tracksuit and his hair in a short buzz cut. Timmy Laurent.

"Timmy!" She shouted and ran to him and threw herself around his neck, even if she was just wearing the short skirt and a pair of nipple covers. He laughed and hugged her.

"That's some weird ass outfit as you have, I can see Andrew works half time as a stylist nowadays."

Aurora just giggled and hugged him tighter. They had broken up a year ago because he had cheated with some model with such a weird name she couldn't remember it. She should be angry at him but it was so nice to see a person she knew well. There were so many new people around her all the time.

"What are you doing here? I thought you lived in New York now," she asked and dragged her hands over his chest.

"I live where I please, you know. If I knew how happy you would be to see me, I would have moved here ages ago."

He smiled playfully but there was a sweetness to it. Aurora smiled brightly but there was sadness in her eyes. After being with Philip it was really nice to see him, a guy that actually treated her well.

"Can I wait for you here or can we like, meet somewhere?" He asked and laid her hair over her chest like he wanted to cover her a bit.

"You can wait here, if you want to?"

Timmy smiled and nodded. He looked at Aurora going back to the photoshoot and got a retouch of powder from her make up artist. She was so beautiful, such a perfect girl, the perfect girlfriend. He wanted her back. No model could compete with her.

×××

"I'm seeing someone."

Bill was not prepared for hearing those words. He had thought he would be the one finding someone before her. He hadn't even slept with someone else yet. His ex sat next to him on the couch in his temporary apartment, he hadn't found anything yet so he rented an apartment second hand from a friend. His ex had announced that she would visit him the day before and he believed she was upset he still hadn't found a real home but instead she threw this in his face.

"Oh…? Really?" He said and dragged a hand over his face. He wasn't jealous, she wasn't what he wanted but it took a blow at his confidence that he hadn't even dared trying to flirting with another woman yet while she seemed to be in a relationship with someone already. It hadn't even been a year and she had already felt comfortable enough to invite someone into her life.

For a second he thought she looked smug but when he looked at her again she just looked at him with searching eyes.

"I guess you will see us around, together… It's Henrik Wilder, the lawyer?" She said and took a sip of her coffee. He was a bit of a celebrity lawyer so of course he knew who he was. Bill just nodded a little.

"Do you see anyone?"

Bill heard her question over and over in his head. He really just wanted to say 'yes' but she would ask too much then.

"Not really no…"

"But you're okay with this?" She laid her head to the side in a caring way but Bill felt it was more like mocking. He laughed and smiled at her, bringing out his best acting.

"Of course. When it's time I think I will meet someone amazing."

He thought about it all day. She was seeing someone. She had a boyfriend while he couldn't even remember how you flirted with someone. He had played flirtatious, seductively characters, maybe he just could go into them for a night so he could get some pussy.

He sat on the couch, in the same place he had when his ex was there and looked at pictures of all kinds of girls in Stockholm. He had downloaded a dating app and with a fake name and picture he scrolled through to see what he could find. All of them looked desperate. Woman between 35-45. He lowered the age to 30 but didn't think it made such a difference. He lowered it down to 25 but then he felt old instead. He remembered it like he was more or less an adult when he was twenty-five but these girls seem to act like teenagers. Party pictures and crop tops. He deleted the app after just forty minutes. Like a guy like him could use an app to find a lay. He needed someone that wouldn't write about it on Twitter the next day. His phone rang while he held it. Kalle.

"Hey honey," he answered with a goofy smile.

"Hello, hello. Are you free tonight? Me and Amir are so fucking restless so we’re going out for some drinks, are you down?"

It started to tick in Bill's head. He licked his lips and dragged his thumb over the stubble on his chin.

"Sure, sure. That sounds great."

They went to a much more crowded place than they usually did, on Bill's request. It was obvious for his friends what his goal was with the night but they didn't point it out, they knew this was hard enough for Bill. He sat for a long time just looking at the girls surrounding him. Several were attractive but he couldn't see anyone he found attractive in that way he was prepared for awkward conversation with. He chugged his beer and once again fixed his hair.

"Don't overthink it. She doesn't need to see your kids. It's just for a night," said Amir and got a look by Kalle. Bill shrugged his shoulders.

"I don't know. Guess I'm just… picky," he said and looked at a girl close to them. Why did so many women in Södermalm dress so weird?

"What do you like then?" Asked Amir and now also Kalle looked at Bill curiously. He had been with the same woman for such a long time they really didn't know. All of them knew Amir liked women that looked like dominatrixes, all of them knew Kalle always looked at a girl's ass first. But Bill? It wasn't like his ex was his type because the women who sat at the table next to them looked like a younger version of her and every time she had given him a look he had bit his jaws together and looked away.

Bill didn't know what to answer because he had tried to find that out himself but hadn't really succeeded.

"Good lips? Like, good lips without being… Fake?" He said.

"That's a good one!" Said Kalle. "You like lips." Bill nodded and looked down in his beer glass.

"I guess she could be a bit younger? Not like…" he nodded to a group of girls in their twenties. "But like 30+?"

His friends nodded.

"The body?" Said Amir with a smirk. "Say a celebrity with a good body."

Bill laughed and shook his head.

"I would say that actress, Samara Weaving!" Said Amir and Bill smirked.

"You have been obsessed with her since that horror movie! That's more than ten years ago, man!"

"She's hot!"

Bill laughed and looked at Kalle.

"Do you also have one?" He asked him.

Kalle smiled, a bit embarrassed.

"Aurora Lou. Way too young but… Fuck she's hot."

Amir nodded and made a pleased sound. Bill wasn't totally sure which one of the twenty-something singers it was but he knew she was too young for all three of them.

"And that Pillow Talk video, fucking yes," said Amir and Bill laughed and shook his head.

"I'm mostly interested in her…"

"Ass, we know that," Bill filled in, teasingly. It was extra funny to tease Kalle because he never seemed to be pleased with any girl.

"Swedish girls don't look like that."

Bill and Amir laughed and looked around.

"No they don't!"

×××

Paolo looked at his daughter after one more time having walked past her while she was lying on the couch. Her friends sat there too with their eyes on the screen. They were watching some movie, set in the 40s with men in hats and suspenders.

"How is it my little Lou?" He asked and patted her cheek. She just shrugged her shoulders and continued to look towards the TV. A tall man with intense eyes kissed a woman outside of a hotel entrance and Aurora sighed.

"Maybe you shouldn't watch this depressing movie? Doesn't he kill his wife soon?"

"Paolo..! I haven't seen this movie before!" Said her friend Erica with a whiny voice.

"Sorry but are you surprised? He has been walking around the whole movie looking sad but also weirdly murderous."

"It's just because of his big eyes!"

"I also have big eyes, I don't look like a murderer because of it!" Said Aurora.

Erica just smirked toward her.

"But you want to sleep with one."

"Oh shut up! My dad is here!" She said even if she wasn't really embarrassed in front of her dad. Paolo smiled and shook his head.

"Nice knowing you think about something pleasant."

Aurora hushed him while her friends Erica and Roxy laughed.

"But a tall man like that will never become my son in law! If so, he must stand on his knees in all the photos together with me!"

Aurora rolled her eyes but smiled amused. She turned her attention to the man on screen again. He sat in a train, with his hat in his lap and looked out dreamily at a landscape as green as his eyes. He was so beautiful, such a man and when she googled his name she couldn't find anything about cheating or drugs.

In the next scene was another guy in focus. He was also attractive, younger and Aurora googled him too but the tall actor had something she couldn't put her finger on. Every new facial expression was exciting and changed his face. He could go from angelic to demonic in a second. She got lost in the movie for a while and forgot about how Timmy had cheated again. It was the third time now. Once again a model she couldn't learn the name of. He had blamed the cocaine and that made it actually just worse. She hadn't even tried any drugs and she felt dirty by just hearing him talk about it. She didn't want a boyfriend who did coke and couldn't keep his hands away from other girls. She looked at the sepia colored movie and wished she could find a man for once, that treated her like a woman, not something to show off or play with when they had time. She wanted a man that cared about her, that didn't feel less of a man because of her success and even wanted her the days she didn't even want herself but that night she forgot that again. She forgot how her friends said that she deserved more or how her parents encouraged her to stand for what she believed in. She agreed to meet Timmy again, just to finally put an end to it all but instead she got reminded of how sweet he could be, how alone she had felt without him and how hard it actually was to find a good guy. He had just cheated, when he had taken drugs. He wasn't like Philip and tried to control her, diminish her or let his friends bully her. Timmy promised to stop with the drugs and he promised to party less and be with her more. It was what he really wanted.

Aurora let him sleep over at her and her parents house. He crawled down between her pink sheets and she let him push into her from behind. "Will you come with me?" He asked and kissed her neck and she giggled.

"Yeah…"

She didn't come that time either but she was happy seeing Timmy so pleased.

×××

He had come this far now. He was impressed by himself. He actually had gone up to the women by the bar and now spoke relaxed about the interior of the New York bar. He was in character, it was easier. He plastered on a bigger smile than he otherwise wore, he pulled jokes that made him cringe and could even feel he did gestures that one of his more flirtatious characters did. Right then and there he hated himself, because he did all of this just to get laid. To his disappointment she liked him, she liked him so much that instead of wanting to sleep with him she gave him her number and asked him out for a coffee the next day. He said yes to be polite but knew he would come up with an excuse the next day. He just wanted pussy. How hard could it be?

He wasn't ready to go to bed when he and his co-stars came back to the hotel. To once again go to bed and masturbate was even embarrassing to think about. He sat down in the hotel bar with a whisky and scrolled his phone. He had missed a friend's 40th birthday and looked at the pictures from the party. In just a year it would be his time. Because he had always been with a woman older than him he more or less already saw himself as 40, when she became 40 he had become 40ish. That was four years ago. He had aged himself with five years just like that and now it was time for him to take those years back.

"Hey, do you know if someone is sitting here?" Bill looked up at the woman standing by the table next to his. She was attractive, a bit more business style than he preferred but beautiful.

"I don't know… But no one is sitting here," he motioned to the other armchair by his table. He felt the character take over again but he just needed that guy's confidence for the moment. He made her laugh and after some seconds of looking at his charming smile she sat down.

Her name was Linda. They were the same age and she worked as a buyer for a healthcare company. Other than that he didn't remember much the next day while looking at her in the hotel bed. He had finally gotten laid and it had actually been really good. He could still pleasure a woman and he finally knew how it was to sleep with someone else. It wasn't so good he wanted to do it again with Linda but so good he knew he would do all these embarrassing things again with someone else.

Linda opened her eyes and looked at him with a smile.

"Hey Bill…"

"Hey…" Bill smiled too but only thought about how he would be able to leave her room without looking like a jerk.

"Em… I have work today so… I think I must go soon," she said and sat up, covering her chest.

"Oh! Sure, sure…" Bill felt a bit embarrassed while he pulled on his clothes. She kicked him out. That had never happened before. Maybe he should be relieved that she didn't want them to eat breakfast together but instead he felt that he probably wasn't such an interesting guy. Maybe meeting women would be much harder than he thought. They said goodbye with an awkward hug, pretending that there wasn't a used condom in the trash bin and then Bill left.

He had sex! Finally! He laughed to himself when he sat down on the bed and felt the post sex hormones become even wilder when he saw that the girl asking him out for a coffee had answered the text he just had sent her.

"Haha, It's okay. My name is Michelle. Me and my client are in town for a couple of days so I would love to meet you for a drink either today or tomorrow."

He remembered that she worked in PR but that was about it. It could be nice trying to be the normal Bill with a woman and see if that would work too. Maybe he could get laid before the day was over.

×××

Aurora looked at herself in the mirror while gathering her hair to a high ponytail. She had been a guest on a late show and was now ready to go back to the New York hotel again. She got some invites to go out but she didn't feel like it. Chocolate and a horror movie sounded much more endearing.

"I guess you can come with me otherwise? I don't think it would be a problem."

Michelle offered Aurora to join her and her date if she didn't want to be with the people from the late show. Michelle was her assistant, fourteen years older than her and if Aurora knew her after the two years together she was totally sure she didn't want Aurora to destroy her date. Aurora knew she was an expert of stealing people's attention. She didn't do it on purpose, of course, there were people that just couldn't treat her like a normal human being.

"It's okay. I think I just want to be alone a while. But could you tell me about your date tomorrow?" Said she playfully and wiggled her eyebrows. Michelle laughed, mostly of relief.

"Absolutely. But Aurora, you should be proud of yourself that you have finally put an end to everything with Timmy. I know he can be a nice guy but… You deserve someone so much better."

Aurora smiled but it was a sad smile. Timmy and her had been on and off since they were teenagers and she had fallen back so many times just by the comfort. She could see that she deserved better but she worried such a person didn't exist close to her.

"Thank you Michelle… But go now! So you don't miss the guy!" She said with a bright smile without knowing the guy her assistant would meet would become her own husband in the future.

×××

Bill looked at the music video over and over. It wasn't by choice but when you had a four year old, a seven year old and a twelve year old daughter, a music video with a fairy was the only thing you got to see on the TV somedays. His oldest daughter had connected her phone to the TV so he couldn't even control it, he just sat behind them on the couch, scooted down and watched them dance with dramatic out of sync movements.

"Look at this dad!" Said his middle daughter and showed how she had learned the singer's exact head movement, or it wasn't really that similar but she believed so.

"Oh wow, that's awesome honey," he said and smiled without lifting his head from the backrest. His oldest daughter sat next to him and looked at him intensely, Bill looked back at her with a similar look and asked why she was looking at him like that.

"Will you also meet someone new? Like mom did?"

Bill sat up on the couch and turned to her. He smiled a little uncomfortably and put his hands down the pocket of his hoodie.

"I don't know honey."

He knew he wanted to meet someone but for the moment he doubted he actually would do it. He wondered if he actually could fall in love, maybe he never had even been in love before.

"Do you want to?" His oldest daughter asked, being nosy and he smirked a little. To pry in others' personal life she hadn’t gotten from him.

"We will see… Why do you like this video so much?" He asked instead and turned his eyes to the TV again where a gorgeous brunette with fairy wings' naked body was just covered in glitter. Should they even watch it?

"It's Aurora Lou. They love her," she said and nodded to her sisters who tried to dance and move like the young singer. Bill looked at his daughters at first but then he looked at the fairy girl. They filmed her body, then her face closely, when she licked her full lips and seduced him with big brown eyes. He could feel a tingle in his cock and at once looked away. He wondered for himself if it was just as bad as looking at Tinkerbell in a sexual way. He looked at his phone instead and read the latest message from Ylva again. He had been on a date with her a few days ago and slept with her. She wasn't at all the kind of girl he wanted. She was dry and pretentious while he knew now he wanted something completely different from that. He didn't want anyone that reminded him of his ex. He just wanted passion, fun, silliness. He wanted a girl who made every fiber in his body alive, dance, get erect. No more fucking lagom.

He forgot the fairy girl quite fast after that and he didn't learn who the artist behind Pillow Talk was but he would never ever forget the day he met Aurora Lou…

×

[doiesfav]

: ̗̀➛ Music, Dance - Ten ||

''It hurts losing passion about something you loved''

Pairing: Artist! Ten x fem! Reader

Plot: Ten, who loves to dance and paint, had to choose one option for his future and his heart went for art so now he owns an art workshop. On the other hand, his passion for dancing slowly started to disappear until y/n appeared.

Genre: Fluff, romance, fiction, slice of life.

Contains: Cuss words, mention of sex

Wc 1k>

A/n: Thanks for supporting me guys, this is really wholesome TT (ngl these fics always become short even tho I planned them to be long)

MASTERLIST

꘎♡━━━━━♡꘎

(Third person pov)

6 years have passed since Ten chose an art degree over dancing, both were important for him but making that decision was probably one of the toughest moments for him.

After graduating he opened his own art workshop to make a living, it got popular after few weeks because of the activities you could do there. And of course he was more than satisfied knowing all his hard work paid off.

But there is still one more thing. What about dancing? Did he really spend all his life practising dancing just to do nothing about it? And like every normal person would, he lost his passion for dancing.

Ten had no time for it, he was busy with the shop, painting works, and most annoying, dealing with his girlfriend.

Jinna was her girlfriend, they met in university, but after graduating she didn’t pay any attention to Ten at all. Instead, partying outside and drinking was all she could do since her parents were rich, every time she got drunk she would call Ten to come and pick her up just for them to later have emotionless sex.

Ten really wanted her to change but he couldn’t say it straight up, he just kept it for himself and wishing for the non existent thing to happen. But there was something inside him telling him that loosing her would be very painful.

Today a special customer was coming, y/n, a known choreographer. When the time came Ten greeted her and made her sit in the chair, “So how does this work?” She smiled sincerely, “I’m not used to this stuff”, Ten could see the innocence and made her feel comfortable while explaining how it works.

“And you just do it like that, you can express yourself by the painting” After that Ten left when he recieved a message from Jinna.

hey babeee

im sorry if you are still angryyy

I told you i was drunk and it wasnt my intention to fuck him

I was really drunk babeee pls dont be angry

But Ten just ignored it and got back to work, his mind was very messy, and could not process how his girlfriend cheated on him. I mean he could have predicted it but he was still annoyed by the fact that Ten still didn't wanna break up with Jinna.

An hour later Ten got up and went to check on y/n who was almost finished with it. It was a painting of someone in a dance room dancing in front of the mirror, which made Ten feel overwhelmed and brought up some of his memories.

“It is really beautiful” Y/n looked back at Ten and gave him a warm smile. “thank you, I really appreciate it”. Those words made Ten a beat in his heart. ''I was very interested in dancing back then'' He laughed off.

''Really? Why don't you do it now?'' He felt kinda sad after y/n asked that, it was really noticeable. ''Oh, sorry I didn't mean to'' ''No, don't worry, I just grew up and find arts more enjoyable'' It was Ten's first time speaking about dancing after a really really long time. He couldn't remember when was the last time he talked about it.

They both spent their time talking about it, Ten felt like his heart was blooming and felt a strange feeling; as if his younger self was with him. ''Do you wanna come with me after your shift to dance?''

Ten saw it as an opportunity to relieve stress and make himself feel happy after a while. When he closed the shop he went to the dance studio y/n told him to go, it was his first time in such a professional room for dancing. The room was incredibly big, maybe twice the size of the dancing room he used to go to before.

His heart was beating rapidly because of the excitement. ''do you wanna go straight or slowly?'' She giggled while covering her mouth with her hand, ''Let's start slowly, I haven't done this in a very long time'' He laughed off.

''So do you have any favorite danceable song?'', while thinking it hit him that he's never got to think about music too. Suddenly Ten remembered his sister saying ''I love Music, Dance by NCT, you don't know? What a loser'' It was like a week ago, she's been into that boy group lately.

''Um, do you know Music, Dance by NCT?'' y/n seemed surprised, ''Yeaa of course, I did some choreographies for them, then we can start stretching'' Ten felt as his youth started taking over. Was dancing for him always that exciting? While also enjoying the music, moving his body freely was refreshing it was like how snakes shed their skin, except he was shedding his lost passion into something new.

After 2 hours of dancing, they both created a choreography for the chorus of the song, Ten was so proud of himself and deeply appreciate the hard work of y/n too. You two decided to go outside and breath some fresh air.

The aura between you and Ten was very cozy, ''want to do it again?'' Ten shook his head ''I mean I would do it any time you want'' he laughed off. That's when he saw Jinna and a guy holding hands, Ten rubbed his eyes with his hand to check if it really was her, he couldn't believe it.

Then you also catch the couple Ten was seeing, ''What the fuck is she doing'' You understood what was happening at the moment quickly, and he walked to stop her holding hands with the guy.

''Excuse who are you'' The guy who was with Jinna said, ''She's my fucking girlfriend?'' And the guy backed ''Jinna you told me you were single what the fuck'' Then he stormed off seeing annoyed, ''What do you think you are doing, we were over'' Ten looked confused as soon as she said that.

''I've never told you we were over'' She just removed Ten's hands and walked off screaming ''Now we are over dumbass''. He stood there and tears started to fall down his cheek, realizing you should do something you went there and hugged him.

Surprisingly he didn’t reject that hug, but he did cry loudly, you cleared his tears with your hand “Ten you can cry don’t worry, everyone deserves a second chance, so you do” You didn’t know if that helped him more of made him worse “I just don’t know myself anymore, Im lost”

To be honest, you didn’t know how to handle that situation instead you just said “Ten, If something happens Im here, okay?”

Thanks for reading y’all <3 And you could follow because big things are coming (I already said that like a 100 times lmao)

[lostinatrainofthoughts]

A month plus ago, someone randomly slid into my dms claiming they knew me from primary school.

He finally said his name was danial K (oh boy, not another danial 😂). Funny enough, this was the last person i would think to ever try to connect with me? He was one of the popular ones back in school and i was surprised he knew me. we would sometimes see eachother in passing but we never acknowledged the other’s existence. So i was caught off guard he even recognised who i was. A little back story, him and his sister were well known in school because theyre half white in a sea of purely malay kids intrigued by the exoticness of an anomaly.

He told me he wanted to get to know me better and be friends? He was apparently very close to (probably seeing?) my bestfriend at the time so he mentioned that he knew me from her i think. Or observed? He said we looked tightknit (we fought often btw but she did give me a hamster) and he says if shes nice then i must be nice too. I dont know if hes trying to replicate what he had with my friend with me bc our conversations always somehow involved her. And i feel like one way for him to reconnect with her was through me? I lost contact with her agesss agoo, and shes off the grid. So i dont know how i felt about this whole thing.

Then as we got to chatting, the more wariness i felt about him being a douche lessened. He was notoriously known to be a player. He told me he peaked in primary and was bullied violently in secondary. He told me people made fun of him being short (i didnt know this) and name-called him saying he looked like megamind (this i knew). There were awful rumours about his sister too that she leaked her nudes (which apparently i bought in at the time and he said none of it was true). It wasnt just the name-calling, it was physical abuse too. I felt bad because of what he went through. he wasnt the type to fight back and hes super patient, which is admirable. It dispelled my initial perception of him and i really fed into the rumours. He really did peak in primary as he mentioned how much he enjoyed his time there (i hated primary). he also has broken English eventho his father's white.

so after all the conversations of good ol times in primary (of his). he started to text me every single day. he would ask me what I ate for lunch, breakfast, dinner and repeat; asked how work was and wished me good luck for work, repeat. now it was getting a little exhausting when conversations were like this. since he asked if we could be friends, and i said sure why not. but he was taking this label very seriously, like something he had to prove himself worthy of. he started calling me "bestie waina" and with every single breath. he always without fail, mentioned that I was his "bestie" and striving to become the "best bestie I ever had". He was becoming borderline obsessive about being my best friend. he refers to himself in third person;__; (ex: "danial is going to work", "danial misses my bestie waina") or "oh I love working offshore, you [sometimes he would also call me "you"]" + "i only think about 3 things when I'm away: myself, my family, and my bestie waina". he asked me once whats a green flag in a bf. so at this point i haven't expressed me being uncomfie bc I'm a ppl pleaser and an avoidant, so when he pulled that qn i was like oh this is my time to shine! so i told him "besties don't always text each other every time, only when they have something to say, they give space, and being bestfriends takes years :) " he reads my texts as soon as it was sent. no matter the time of the day, even at ungodly hours, hoping he wasnt gonna reply bc he was asleep - he still did! like girl............... but after that particular text, he opened it 16 hours after lol, and said he will tone it down. it didn't last. it took 5 days for him to resume his routine of asking me what I ate again.

it was getting out of hand because he said things like "where are you? what are you doing? i would teleport to where you are if I could" and it was just plain creepy. so I lied and I said I'm seeing someone I matched with on tinder. he replied "I support you my BFF waina" so I started to think, maybe he does only want to be friends. but then he pulls "thanks for telling me you're going out w a guy" and I was like huh?????? I didnt say it because I felt obligated but I said it so that he would back off. again, the male species fails to understand these things. But I knew it tipped him off, bc he replied over a day later. to add, he also said he wanted to save "kr8" (as in credit, yes he types like he's stuck in the early 20s) because the wifi wasnt stable so he's gonna log out and stay in touch in April (before knowing he was like this, I said yeah we could meet up :") ) so we stopped texting.

but it doesnt end thereeeeeeeeeeeee.

i told this ordeal to my cousin 2 weeks after who said I should block him. she convinced my avoidant ass by saying I don't owe him anything. I like the idea of running away from my problems, thinking it would solve itself so I did! at the time, ig didn't give me the option to "also block new accs they might create".

oh boy, two days later, he made two different ig accounts to text me...... . i knew it was him because one had a similar username as his old one. i immediately disabled my ig for 3 days bc I was so damn frightened.i only opened it back because everyone was telling me to communicate.

Both DMs from those two accs were sent at a 15 min intervals. one was a cryptic ominous "You". The other was a long text message about how he was upset and he didn't get why I did what I did (I felt bad of course, bc again I didn't say anything instead my people-pleasing ass was just going w the flow until it all became too much). then he started victimising himself, said things like he'll heal on his own, he will stay strong. he even gaslit me and said "he forgave me" lmao. he said he didn't see the point of ig anymore (the ig he used to contact me was a burner account. i was the only mutual) so he disabled all three accounts.

his final text was him giving out his phone number if i ever wanted to talk to him. so although all his accounts were disabled, i could still text these accounts from laptop (glitch). so i lied and said i had a bf (bc ya... i didn't want the blame all on me) and that this "bf" wasnt happy w me talking to other guys so i did what he told me. i told denial i was sorry repeatedly. that he deserved a meaningful friendship with someone else. because the guilt ate me alive. he's sent his phone no. before on 3 diff occasions btw. the first one, I told him I was uncomfortable w sharing. so in that final text to him, I made it clear that i was NOT gonna text him through whatsapp (that's just asking for it). i told him this already. then consumed by anger, i retorted saying that i mentioned friends give each other space, but he chose to ignore that. and also "please don't create any more new accounts to text me. it makes me feel unsafe." the end