#but the other actress is not As good so i’m struggling to finish but !! she’s a talented lovely person i love her

[littlemissmentallyunstable]

HIII OK SO THIS IS A REALLY SPECIFIC REQ SO IF U CANT DO IT THEN ITS ALL GOOD

so

COULD U DO AVERY X BESTFRIEND!READER (PLATONIC OFC) WHERE HER BESTGRIEND IS LIKE A SINGER / ACTRESS

MAYBE THE READER JS GOING THROUGH A ROUGH SPOT W JAMESON AND AVERY COMFORTS HER.

JUST SOME BESTIE LOVE YK

hi!! I’m SO SO SO SO SO SO INSANELY sorry it’s taken me so long to respond to this request it was literally requested on the 20th of august and I feel so bad!! but I finally finished and I hope you enjoy

title: she’s always there

pairing: avery x bestfriend!reader (platonic)

synopsis: after a fight with jameson you know you need avery at your side to make things right again

warnings: mild swearing

a/n: three months too late but I didn’t forget you, hope you enjoy anon :))

taglist: @lovethornes @whatsamongus @wish-i-were-heather @inmyheaddd @never-enough-novels @fleuriosa @midiosaamor @sweetreveriee @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @zaraaaabear @thoughtdaughter3 @benny1989fredd @elysianwayy77 @maybxlle @sheisntyou @anintellectualintellectual @aleatorio1234 @adalia-jaycee @off-to-the-r4ces @lyra-kane @reminiscentreader @lyrakanefanatic @imaseabear @elizaa31 @loveinalocket @lanterns-and-daydreams @hermesenthusiast

The door slams shut. The sound echoes through my ears, bouncing around my head, a painful reminder of all that had just exploded. I stumble forwards, my fingers shaking on the doorknob. I want to run to him but my legs are stuck in an invisible cement. So my body gives way and I crumble to the floor.

Tears blur my vision as I shake in a pathetic heap. My chest hurts with each ugly sob. I hate fighting, but I hate this even more. This pain, this agony. I sob harder until my throat is so raw only cracked sounds come out.

I stay there for what feels like hours, maybe even days. I’m heavy with exhaustion and grief. I know I need to get up but I don’t move. I can’t will myself out of this position. Fear flickers in the pit of my stomach. Why can’t I get up? I have no energy, no motivation.

Nothing, I feel nothing.

But even the dread of feeling nothing doesn’t even pull me from the numbness. My skin is thickened with a layer of senselessness. I’m too weighted by my own sadness to move. This happened before, this happened last time, this couldn’t happen again.

I could hear my heart thumping in my ears. The sound almost deafening. I’m taking sharp jagged breaths that I can’t control. I need Avery.

I need her more than anything right now. She promised me if things got bad again that she would be one call away. And she made me promise that I’d call her. I couldn’t break my promise, I’m not a person who breaks their promises.

But I haven’t seen her in weeks and what if she only thinks I call her when I’m struggling? What if she thinks I’m using her? What if she gets tired and just walks out like everyone else?

I usually block out ‘the before’. But I can remember snippets, like how I couldn’t to get out of bed, to get off of the floor, to move, to eat, to take care of myself and how I felt then I’m starting to feel now. An icy coolness is pulsating through my veins, so sharp that I can’t feel it anymore.

My phone is next to my face. I can see it. But my finger feels like they’re being dragged down my a large iron ball and chain. I can’t even reach my phone for my emergency contact. My hollow chest begins to throb.

“Call Avery,” I whisper to my phone, “please call Avery. I need her.”

One ring. Tw-

“Ave,” I murmur, my voice shaking.

She replies almost instantly, “what’s wrong?”

She’s sharp, she’s ready, she’s immediate. She’s going to help me pull myself together, I tell myself.

“I need you,” I whisper, not knowing what else to say other than the truth. I can’t sugarcoat anything now. I’m not fine. I can’t move.

“I’m coming,” Avery tells me.

“It’s getting bad again,” I snivel the words just blurting out before there’s enough time for them to be filtered

I feel her freeze for a moment, “bad?”

“I’m stuck on the floor,” I mumble, my throat hoarse and sore, “I can’t move.”

“Just wait there okay,” she comforts, “I’m coming.”

“My life is a mess,” I ramble, not being able to stop myself. I’ve lost control, over my mind, over my body, over my words.

“I’ll be over in two minutes okay, stay on the line with me,” she says urgently.

“I’m sorry,” I say choking out another sob, “I’m so so sorry.”

“Don’t you dare apologise,” she says firmly but with kindness behind her tone, “just sit tight and I’m coming.”

“Okay,” I exhale, trying to ignore the lump growing in my throat.

“What happened?” she asks so softly I just want to melt into even more of a puddle of a human being. I’m halfway there, my limbs sprawled every which way, my tearstained face covered by a curtain of hair.

“Everything went wrong,” I tremble, not knowing how else to describe it. The scene plays out in the mind again and again, a pitiless record of pain on loop.

“What’s everything?” Avery asks, her voice so mellow, so gentle, so calm.

“Jameson.”

His name sends a twinge of pain across my chest.

“Oh sweetie I’m sure it’s okay,” she says, “it’s normal for couples to fight.”

“Not like this,” I shake my head as if she can see me.

“Let me in and we’ll talk about it,” she says.

“You’re outside?” I ask my voice opting for the tone of a vulnerable child. She’d arrived faster than I thought she would.

“Yes,” she confirms.

“Door’s unlocked,” I murmur, the words kind of slurring into one another as I said them.

“I might get a speeding ticket tomorrow but it’ll be worth it,” the door opens, “besides Alisa will probably be able to get me out of it.”

“Mmmm,” I respond, feeling tired, each of my limbs weighing me down as if they were made of lead.

“Sweetie you need to stand up,” she tells me gently, I can feel her hand running up and down my arm rhythmically.

“I can’t,” I wheeze, everything was so heavy it ached.

“You can,” Avery replies, “I’m going to help you.”

“I’m tired,” I groan, my vision blurring as my eyelids fall shut.

“Then we can go to bed,” she says.

My lips quiver, “Avery?”

“Yeah,” she murmurs.

“I can’t stand up,” I whisper, the ghost of my voice vibrating against my throat, “I can’t do it.”

“Here then let’s sit up first,” she says.

Slowly she helps me into a sitting position. The world feels a little hazy. My head rolls backwards and thumps on the wall, it’s too heavy to hold up.

A flicker of pain spreads across the back of my head, the first real feeling in my state of numbness. She wraps her arms around me and I fall into her softly crying. I don’t know if it’s the pain in my head or the pain in my heart endorsing the tears but I don’t care.

She holds me tightly and tenderly as if she might never let go. I fear if she does I’ll fall apart and break into millions of pieces on the floor that can never be put back together again. My entire body shakes as my tears dampen my best friend’s shirt.

“Come on,” she says slowly, helping me to my feet after a long bout of silence.

I don’t want to move but my legs are willed too having obtained pins and needles from my static state. I don’t know how she managed to get me thinking about something other than my absence of feeling, allowing me to walk, but she did. We slump down on the sofa together and I curl up into her grip. I don’t want to let Avery go, not when my mind is retelling the story.

“What is your problem with me?” I scoff, putting the dishes into the cupboard not really meeting his eyes.

He’d been offish all through dinner, the one chance we actually had to spend time with each other and of course he picks that moment to be mad.

“My problem?” he says, with a bitter laugh, “you want to know my problem?”

“That is what I just said isn’t it?” I quip back, a bit snarky.

“Where are you half the time?” he asks, a degree of hurt in his voice that makes my heart twist.

I stare at him, dumbfounded as my brain registers the question, “what?”

“I never see you anymore,” Jameson tells me, “I mean any longer without you and I feel like I’m going to forget your face.”

“You do see me,” I reply curtly.

“No I don’t and you know it,” he snaps, a wild looking shining through his emerald eyes.

“Jamie I can’t help my schedule,” I sigh, putting my hands on my hips, “I didn’t choose this.”

“Maybe you didn’t but you’re not trying to do anything about it,” he accuses me.

“I am!” I exclaim, throwing my hands up into the air.

“No you’re not,” he shakes his head, “you’re not doing anything and it’s not fair.”

“Give it a month and-“

“No! I’m tired of waiting,” he says, desperation bleeding into his voice, “it’s always next month this and next week that, I’m sick and tired of waiting for us.” he runs a hand through his unruly hair, “isn’t love meant to come first?”

“I need a job,” I say in a low voice, “I need money Jameson.”

“I’ll give you money,” he groans a pleading look in his features.

“You don’t understand,” I yell, “I need to make this for myself.”

“Why?” he shouts, “I could give you anything you ever wanted!”

“I wanted to earn something, not just be given it,” I try to explain.

“You’ve earned everything you need to,” he presses on.

“Acting is what I love to do Jamie,” I tell him, the passion seeping into my voice, “these auditions are what I love to do.”

“I thought you loved me,” he shoots back.

“I do,” I exhale, “you know I do.”

Jameson shakes his head with a bitter and slightly pained sort of smile, “it feels like all you care about is this stupid work of yours.”

My eyes are squinted shut. I’m trapped in a memory I hate, held captor in a prison of my mind’s own making.

“Talk to me,” Avery whispers, “I’m here.”

“Jamie hates me, I barely see you, I overwork, I can’t sleep, all my auditions are going horribly and I’m just messing everything up-“ I ramble, my voice becoming thicker and thicker with emotion with each word.

“Hey,” she says softly, “just breathe.”

“I can’t, it’s like everything is coming at me all at once and I can’t handle it,” I choke, “I feel like I’m drowning Avery and every time I kick up to the surface another wave takes me out again. It’s this cycle that I can’t make my way out of.”

“Oh sweetheart,” she soothes, “just try for me and ignore all of it for a second and just look into my eyes.”

I meet her gentle hazel eyes, but they blur as tears fill my vision.

“Think about us,” she says, “right now. Me and you together, talking to each other. Focus on the present, stop thinking about the future and the past.”

My mind quiets a little, the raging storm of black clouds and loud sounds begins to dim down into a low hum. It’s still there but less. It’s better. A feel a spark of hope pulsate through my veins, previously darkened by hopelessness.

“Feeling a little better?” she tilts her head to the side.

“A little,” I nod hesitantly. I don’t want to speak too soon, there is still time for things too get much much worse.

“That’s good,” she smiles, “that’s really good.”

I exhale slowly, a little shakily. I lean further into Avery and her arms naturally wrap around me. I’m in the safety and warmth of her arms, her soft touch.

“I’ve got you,” she reminds me, “and when you’re ready, just talk and I’ll listen.”

“I don’t know where to start,” I laugh, buts it’s a forced laugh that I soon regret as if makes my throat ache.

“Do you want to talk about what happened between you and Jameson?” she suggests.

“You’re being so pathetic,” I snap, rolling my eyes.

“And you’re being selfish,” he exclaims.

I stop in my tracks and spin to face him, “for wanting to make something of myself for my life? I’m not you, Jameson. I didn’t get everything handed to me on a golden platter.”

Hurt flashes across his face.

“You think I haven’t worked for what I am today?” he barks, “you think I was just given all of this?”

“I’m just saying it’s not as simple as you think it is,” I groan, trying to walk away.

He stands in front of me, looking deep into my eyes, his tone softens, “I would move the sun and the stars just to spend time with you,” anger clouds his features, sending an overcast of fury to his eyes, “but I don’t see you trying to change anything to see me.”

“I have tried,” I tell him, “but it’s really difficult Jameson and I’m exhausted,”

“Exhausted of what? Of this, of our relationship,” he snaps, quick to jump to some ridiculous conclusion.

“Are you drunk?” I laugh.

“Why do you always think I’m drunk?” he shoots back, venom on his tongue.

“Because you’re spouting nonsense,” I reply, raising my voice a little.

“Of course, of course,” he rolls his eyes in his bout of sarcasm, “I’m the one who’s spouting nonsense.”

“What do you want me to do Jameson?” I ask, a lump growing in my throat, “drop everything for you?”

“Love comes with sacrifices,” he shrugs in response.

“So what I’m meant to sacrifice my entire passion?” I scoff.

He couldn’t be serious.

“No I’m just asking you to at least attempt to make more time,” he says, “I mean don’t you miss me like I miss you?”

“Of course I miss you,” I sigh.

“Then why don’t you show it?” he asks and I can see how much it wounds him, “you’re a closed book around me now. I used to be able to read you so well but now it’s like a blank page.”

“How would you know, I thought you didn’t see me anymore?” I bite back.

“We got into a fight,” I whisper, memories flooding back.

“A bad one?” Avery says carefully, like she’s treading on eggshells.

“He left,” I shrug.

“Asshole,” she mutters in my defence.

“No,” I shake my head, sitting back up to face her, “I was horrible, I would’ve left me.”

Beat.

“But he was horrible too,” I sniff.

“People say things they don’t mean in fights,” Avery points out, reaching to touch my arm.

“Or they say what they’re really thinking,” I blurt out, my mind is too consumed by my own thoughts to filter what I’m saying.

“More often than not it’s things they don’t mean, trust me,” she says, a tenderness in her voice that makes my heart squeeze, “besides Jameson can be a real impulsive idiot sometimes.”

“I love that about him,” I chuckle snivelling slightly, “but… it’s just that lately things haven’t been the same between us.”

“How so?”

“I’m leaving,” Jameson snaps. He’s finally had enough, he’s finally walking out on me. Of course. How could I possibly think someone could really love me as much as he said he did.

“Where are you going?” I ask, a sudden panic clawing at my chest overriding all of the built up anger and resentment.

“Why do you care?” he shrugs, grabbing his keys swiftly.

“Because I love you, you idiot!” I yell.

He stops and slowly turns around. Our eyes connect and for a split second deja vu washes over me and we’re meeting for the first time. I’m falling in love with his enchanting green eyes.

“Do you?” he asks, “really?”

“You’re being such an idiot right now,” I scrunch up my face as I shout, “I hope you know that.”

“If you’ll excuse me I’m going to go and get drunk and spout nonsense like I usually do,” he says, “according to you.”

“Oh come off of it,” I scream, a sudden surge of pure rage appearing.

“What?”

“Stop acting like mr high and mighty on your high horse,” I snarl, “it’s not fair.”

“You know what’s not fair, what you’re doing to me,” he barks, “I’m in limbo here, I don’t know whether you’re coming or going, the only time I see you is when I leave this house and you’re asleep.”

“Then wake me up,” I deadpan, arms folded.

“And make you even more exhausted?” he scoffs, “fat chance!”

“I’m giving you solutions and you’re just deterring them,” I exclaim.

“Because you know they’re stupid solutions,” he explodes.

“Well life is just keeping us apart. I’m always at auditions, he’s off with his brothers, then when I come home he’s asleep and I can’t sleep and then when I finally sleep, he wakes up,” I blubber, “we’re not getting enough time to be with each other and I’m trying so hard to make time, but I don’t have the energy because I’m so exhausted from everything else.”

“And that’s okay, that’s understandable,” she reassures me, “he’s probably just frustrated because he doesn’t get to spend time with you, that shows he loves you, right? Someone who didn’t wouldn’t experience these feelings.”

“I suppose,” I shrug, “but Avery you should have seen him. He was so mad when he walked out. It’s the biggest fight we’ve ever been in.”

“I’m sure things will get better, they always do,” she soothes, “I mean think about to your last fight, how long did that last?”

Barely a few hours, I recall. Jameson and I had never fought for long in our relationship. It was so hard to stay so mad at someone I loved so much.

“What if it’s different this time?” I murmur, imagining the worst.

“It’s not,” Avery says, “trust me.”

“He was just so mad,” I say, biting my lip, “I’ve never seen him look at me like that.”

“Hey, it’s gonna be okay,” Avery tells me gently, “whatever the outcome is, I’ve got you the whole way.”

“Thanks Ave,” I try to smile but it doesn’t quite reach my eyes, “he doesn’t get it, he thinks he does, but he doesn’t.”

“Maybe that’s why he’s getting so angry,” she suggests.

“I wish he would just let me explain,” I groan, putting my head in my hands.

“Why don’t you just communicate that to him?” she says.

“Because I have no time to!” I exclaim, not meaning to sound so defensive and snappy, “I just need to get through this month and then everything will be back to normal.”

“Sweetheart, I think you need to make some time to talk to him,” Avery says earnestly, “in this month. Explain this all to him, otherwise he’s going to keep building up all this anger for no reason and things are going to get worse.”

“Why is he so angry?” I ask in frustration, meaning for the question to be rhetorical.

“Because he doesn’t like not seeing you,” she replies, “he loves you.”

He love me. He loves me. He loves me. The words echo around my head relentlessly.

“I’m stupid,” I say, letting my head hit Avery’s shoulder.

“You’re not stupid,” she replies, putting her arm around me and rubbing small circles on my shoulder with her thumb.

“He hates me,” I mumble into her.

She shakes her head, “he doesn’t hate you.”

“It’s always the same with you, you always want more-“

“I want to see you,” Jameson yells, “is that so much to ask?”

“I will never be enough, you can’t just take me for who I am, what I am, what I need,” I shout back.

“What about what I need?” he questions, “I need to see you and it’s driving me crazy when we’re apart.”

“You need to find a coping mechanism then,” I reply, snarky and spiteful.

He looks at me with a look I’ve never seen in his eyes before. Pure unadulterated hatred. Like he wants me to burn on a thousand spikes after a session of torture.

“Fuck you,” he spits at me, his face so close to mine I can feel his anger.

“Piss off,” I hiss back.

“I will thank you very much,” he replies, swinging the door open.

“And don’t come home,” I snap, “I don’t want to see your face.”

“It’s not like you’ll notice, you don’t see my face anyway,” he calls, slamming the door shut behind him.

“What if this time he doesn’t come back,” I murmur, frightening myself more and more it’s each drastic thought that pops into my head.

“He will come back,” she soothes, continuing to rubbing small circles on my arm, “he always comes back to you.”

She has a point. Jameson always came back, he just needs time to cool off. I hope…

“You’re stronger than you think,” she whispers in my ear, like she can hear the doubts screaming in my brain.

“I don’t feel it,” I grumble.

“That’s what makes you even stronger,” Avery says.

“I’m crying over a boy,” I deadpan.

“Who hasn’t been there?” she smiles, wiping my tears away, “now come on, I’ll get the ice cream tubs, you grab the endless flow of blankets and pillows and we’ll have a movie night.”

I crack a small smile and nod as we stand up. She begins to walk while my legs struggle to follow.

“Avery,” I say, taking a small step forwards.

She spins around with a bright smile, “Yeah?”

“Thank you,” I exhale, “so much.”

sorry there haven’t been a lot updates lately I’ve been super busy 🤍🤍

TIG masterlist

[cwritesforfun]

please please please i beg you write another Emma Darcy x Fem!reader pleeeeeeasssee

Emma D'Arcy x Fem!Reader: Fake Dating

You work as an actress as well. You were Alicent in House of Dragon.

Prompt idea from @prompts-of-the-pond - “I’m auditioning next month for the love interest of a new movie they’re making, but I’ve never been in a relationship… Can you tell me what it’s like? Or, actually, show me, it’ll be easier.”

Y/N = Your Name using She/Her/Hers pronouns Emma's pronouns are They/Them ** I do not own any House of Dragon plot points briefly mentioned

Masterlist

Y/N's POV

You call Emma.

((Start of conversation)) Y/N - Heyyyyy Emma - Hi are you drunk? Y/N - No and you took forever to respond. Emma - What? I answered immediately. What are you drinking? Y/N - A whiskey neat. It's not usually what I drink, but I needed a drink tonight and it was all I could find in my house. I don't even know whose it is. Emma - Haha are you going to be sober for our interview tomorrow? Y/N- Yes of course. I know how to hydrate. Water water water! All anyone talks about is water. Emma - You crack me up. Why did you call? Y/N - Wanted to hear your voice. Emma - Ok well I'm actually busy, but I can call later to talk more. Y/N - No, I'm fine. Bye. ((End of conversation))

You fall asleep immediately after.

Your interviews with Emma for House of the Dragon are borderline flirty every single time. You've thought about asking them out, but you're worried about what would happen if season 3 happened, and what if you didn't work out? It's messing with your head to think about dating your co-worker. Not to mention, you drank too much last night and it went to your head. You have a major hangover and are struggling.

The next day, you finish making a home-cooked dinner and pour yourself a glass of wine. Emma arrives on time and is excited for the dinner.

Emma asks, "So what's the occasion?" You answer, "I had something to run by you. It's kind of help for an upcoming role." Emma asks, "Oh and you need my help? You're more than capable of anything you put your mind to. You don't need my help." You reply, "Thank you, but no. I’m auditioning next month for the love interest of a new movie they’re making, but I’ve never been in a relationship… Can you tell me what it’s like?" Emma asks, "You've never been in a relationship?" You answer, "No, I mean I've made out with plenty of people at parties and been on a couple of dates. But, I just thought of it as something fun that happened for a day or a night. None of them felt long-term." Emma asks, "You say people, so you're into everyone?" You answer, "Yeah, I'm pansexual and like just about everybody, except for jerks." Emma laughs and says, "I can show you what it's like to be in a relationship, it’ll be easier.” You ask, "What do you mean?" Emma answers, "I mean, we take each other out on dates and we act like a couple. It'll be good for me too. I haven't dated a woman in a while and I already like you, so it'll be easy for me." You reply, "I like you too. I just don't want to ruin our friendship because we still work together, especially with the renewal for the next season." Emma replies, "Every great romantic relationship is based on a friendship." You reply, "Ok. So what do we do now?" Emma answers, "Now, we enjoy a nice meal together and maybe watch a movie then we see where the night takes us."

You spend the next month going on dates and you feel yourself starting to fall for Emma.

You're watching TV when you hear someone knock at your door. You open the door to see Emma standing with roses and dressed very sexily. Emma exclaims, "They’re offering a free bottle of wine to couples on Valentine’s Day. I made us reservations for 2 hours from now. Get dressed. We need to leave in 30 minutes to make it." You nod and Emma follows you to the bedroom. You show Emma outfit options and they decide on the outfit that matches theirs.

You arrive at a restaurant that overlooks the valley and its sunset. How did Emma score this prime space on Valentine's Day? OMG! The waiter walks up and exclaims, "Welcome lovely couple. We're running a special promotion for those who booked a month ago to receive a free bottle of Chardonnay wine to thank you for booking early. May I pour you both a glass?" A MONTH AGO?!?! You nod and Emma answers, "Yes for both of us, thank you." The waiter tells you the special menu and then they bring out the appetizer.

Emma asks, "Hey Y/N, you went silent when we got here. What's going on in that pretty brain of yours?" You answer, "Um first off, the location is beautiful and this is so perfect at sunset. And second, the waiter said you booked a month ago. Did you mean to take me here or did you mean to take someone else? I'm so sorry if you couldn't bring who you wanted to this because it's truly spectacular." Emma places their hand on yours before saying, "I like this spot too. I came here once with my parents, but we didn't get to sit by the window... I made the reservation right after you asked me to date you to help you with your role. I knew this holiday would fall within the month, so I knew you had to experience Valentine's Day as my girlfriend... I did want to bring you here. I don't want to be here with anyone else." You reply, "Ok uh cool. Thanks then." Emma nods and smiles.

Emma drops you home after your dinner and you go back to study your lines for your audition. It's tomorrow.

Emma drives you to your audition because you're way too nervous to drive right now. Emma tells you that they'll be at the coffee shop across the street until you're done.

You wait your turn for your audition and it comes pretty quickly. You walk in, deliver your dialogue, and then they ask you to read with one of your character's prospective love interests. So you do. You think it went well.

Emma takes you out to eat afterward and then you decide to go back to your place where you both spend some time in bed.

You keep dating... you start to fall even more in love with Emma. More days and weeks pass...

You're sitting eating lunch at Emma's place when you get a call from your agent, which you answer and you get the role of the love interest.

You stand up and start jumping around. Emma asks, "What is this about?" You put your hands on either side of Emma's head and exclaim, "I did it! I got the role of the love interest! You helped me get the role! Thank you!" Emma asks, "So we're done dating now, is that it? It was all just for the audition?" You move your hands to Emma's and answer, "No no no. I don't want to stop dating you. I want to keep being your girlfriend who is falling madly and deeply in love with you, Emma D'Arcy." Emma smiles and asks, "Are you being serious?" You answer, "I've been falling for weeks. You're everything I could have ever dreamed of as a partner." Emma kisses your cheek and says, "I'm falling ... what did you say? Oh yeah, I'm falling madly and deeply in love with you, Y/N." You smile and you both kiss.

More Emma D'Arcy fanfic - here

[what-gs-watching]

"You guys are like a dead married couple on acid."

Y’ALL, I watched Dead Boy Detectives. Which really, should come as no surprise. Because of the whole Neil Gamain thing. But also because that kind of weird is right up my alley.

I have to say, I’m absolutely loving this trend of teen-shows-with-absolutely-wild-shit-happening. This was not a thing when I was younger, and I thoroughly appreciate it. Why did I only have Dawson’s Creek and Sabrina the Teenage Witch and fucking Boy Meets World? Don’t get me wrong, I love all of those but what I really would have benefited from was teen drama with fucked up situations. Gen Z is kind of lucky I guess? (LOL jk except for the entire state of the world, but at least they get good shows…)

Wherein two teenaged ghosts form a detective agency to help solve cases for other ghosts that would otherwise go ignored, while running from death lest they be forced into the afterlife and separated, making friends with a psychic and other humans along the way. 

The thing is, you gotta let go with this show. It gets INCREDIBLY weird and you have to roll with it. Edwin’s death by accidental satanic sacrifice? Sure. Crystal the psychic purposely letting a demon possess her? Okay yeah. A supernatural entity that controls all cats in a small town, ridiculously named the Cat King? Harder to swallow, but I guess. A literal crow that gets turned into a boy who loves astrology? Confusing but, go on.  Incredibly aggressive and vulgar sprites eventually locked up in a jar? Actually, that’s hilarious I’m good with that. 

Truly, it’s absurd. And surprisingly violent. But also, and again no surprise, I was all about the underlying subtext between Edwin, who died in 1916, and his relationship with Charles, who died in 1989. I will always get behind a decades long ‘will they won’t they’ even if it’s between ghosts. Because I’m a fucking sucker for boys maybe being in love. And the entire trope in general. I love love, gang, even if it’s surrounded by horrible things happening. Maybe even more, if it is? I’m not sure what that says about me, but I’m WITH it. 

Also there is a TON going on in this show, they cover an incredible amount in 8 episodes. I always appreciate shows that can carry an overall storyline and smaller ones in a good balance. Monster of the week slash lore smushed together is always so satisfying. 

I’ve seen some reviews talking about the acting being less than stellar but like, they’re supposed to be kids. Everything is dramatic to kids. Who cares? They carried it as best as they could, and there isn’t anything really that stuck out to me as absolutely cringe worthy. Yeah they look older than they’re meant to but again, who cares. Let go, people. 

AND how excited was I to see the actress that played Rowena in Supernatural as the Night Nurse? Absolutely perfect choice. If they get another season I can’t wait to see her relationship with the boys grow. 

Thinking about it, maybe I like teen dramas that are absolutely not grounded in reality because it’s easier to stomach the allegories they want you to, that way. Edwin learns to confront his feelings, both about Charles and with the kid that inadvertently caused his death. Crystal struggles with her memory and the person she used to be versus the person she wants to be. Niko has to figure out how to have friends again after becoming a shut-in. Charles struggles with memories from his life and feeling powerless, choosing to paper a happy face over it instead. Jenny has to confront her distrust of literally everyone and her fear of love (even if that went  horribly wrong). 

I don’t want to be beaten over the head with life lessons (I still haven’t finished Dawson’s Creek, it’s just too much to take sometimes) but I WILL absorb them while characters fight off horrible witches and try to defeat sea monsters. Ya girl clearly needs to be tricked into learning things. Don’t we all? Isn’t it better that way?  

I mean, you’re still getting force fed those slightly saccharine sentiments, for sure, but it’s easier  to swallow.  Gimme a little bit of spice with that sweet, please. 

The point is: this show is adorable. Can a show that’s about ghosts and witches and general supernatural fuckery be adorable? I don’t care, it totally is. And it slightly quenched my unending Good Omens thirst for like, a minute, and that’s obviously incredibly hard to do. 

So, I’m here for it. Gimme more Dead Boys.

[writingwhilecaffeinated]

Let me start by saying I am in love with you, your writing has me on chokehold. It has been only two-three months I have gotten the hold of AO3 because of bridgerton s3 and now I am in the rabbit hole of Benelope and Penthony all because of you! Your fictions has me obsessed with Benedict and Penelope, you write them so perfectly. I have read all your work and reread them so often, think about them every other day if not daily. Initially I was waiting for 'unspooled thread' to be finished but I could not, and I'm so glad for that. Just caught up with that yesterday and my god what you and @itakethewords has done!!(I love their writing too so much, you both are a force unmatched).

I mean I have to stop reading so many times to catch my breath because it is so so good!! I could feel every emotion radiating through words. Let me say I have never watched s1 & 2, I just watched s3 because of the 'wallflower' tagline as I'm a wallflower too. So Unspooled Thread IS MY CANON. Idk what anyone says, I am in so much love with Benelope, ahhhh they are so perfect!! You have given such a great gift, I have been struggling a lot mentally and your writings have helped me to keep myself sane, to have something to look forward to. I am not saying this lightly but maaaannnn what you did in 'The Becoming of Baron' and 'Many hearts,' I am in awe! I never thought I could read polyandry and here I am reading every reverse harem with Penelope! I love Pen so much, she has such a rich personality that it is so easy to read her pairing with anyone. But man oh man the benelope is just magnificent. Please never stop writing them, your talent is so powerful, your words make me feel so much, it feels so wholesome. You have become one of my favourite writers, and I am not just saying for AO3! In everything I have ever read. I am in awe how you craft stories and show the depth of characters. I was never willing to watch Bridgerton before s3, Idk why. But Nicola Coughlan had me fall in love with her, and Penelope is one of the most alluring female character with all her flaws. I love how your treat her as such, the depth she deserve. Your stories have kept me afloat, the reread value in them is just phenomenal. I could write so many words more but I think will keep repeating, so I just want you to know that your writing has made a change in world, in my life, it has hold me through toughest of times. And I so wholeheartedly appreciate your every effort is gifting us with such wonders. Thanks a million! I wish you and @itakethewords all the happiness in the world.

Hello!!

Oh my goodness, this is the nicest, highest compliment me and @velvetcovered-brick (itakethewords on AO3) could have! Truly, truly, thank you for your kindness and for reading our stories. It means a lot to us!

We understand how reading fanfic can really help when your mental health is suffering. Fanfic is one of the most amazing forms of escapism and I’m so glad and honored we have been able to help with that, even in a small way. ♥️

Also super glad you gave the poly fics a shot! They’re not everyone’s cup of tea, which is completely valid, but I’m so happy you enjoyed them and still found the characters east to love and connect with.

Also, welcome to the Bridgerton fandom! We are so glad that Nicola Coughlan bring the amazing actress she is, convinced you to give season 3 a try.

It’s a super high compliment that our version of s1 and s2 in unspooled thread is basically your canon. That’s incredibly sweet! We will be so interested to see what you think of our version of s3 is when we get there!! It’s going to be the most ambitious yet!

Seriously, thank you for your kindness. Me and @velvetcovered-brick (itakethewords on ao3) really, really, REALLY appreciate it!!

Also, look out for Halloween season! @velvetcovered-brick and I are planning a special Penelope treat… with a bite 🧛

[vexfulfolly]

i’m the guy who drew your boy Leo for artfight, and (for no particular reason) i was wondering. uhm. Enoch siblings reveal? also, what’s his relationship to Leo and Mick? are they friends? how do they behave with each other? not to bombard you with questions, it would just help me out a little. answer whatever you feel like, or don’t answer at all, it just changes how many drawings you get this time around. good morning! or afternoon..! or evening? well, whether morning, noon, or night, have a lovely day!

Crying shaking omg I am so excited to answer this!!

Enoch & Co.

E’s got three younger siblings: Willow, Vida, and Clem(entine).

Willow is the same age as Enoch and could NOT be more different! She’s essentially a social media influencer/ YouTuber, minor actress, and has been a model for a few years. Her abilities came in pretty late, and due to her more “public” status, the gov has had issues trying to corner her or bring her in. Enoch is constantly scrubbing her social media and technology to keep her safe from being tracked, and in return she pays for their apartment (and desperately tries to get him to interact with humans). She will nag, unplug the wifi, pour water on him, anything and everything to get him out in public and seeing the sky. E values her input and leans on her in a personal/ emotional/ leadership capacity. She’s his #2 and has been by his side the longest!

Vida is the middle child and a finicky little shithead. He’s 21, a sophomore in college, and has discovered that drinking is an activity to do, and that he’s literally being hunted by the gov so he can do whatever he wants. He’s got sticky fingers, puppy-dog eyes, and an edge of unaddressed hysteria that makes him a loose cannon. He won’t eat Enoch’s “homemade meals”, complains about the cleanliness of the apartment, and puts out his cigarettes on the doorway. He’s kind of a mess! But like, graceful with it, you know? He usually hangs out with Enoch during the day, or brings home guys and gals (to the detriment of E’s blood pressure). He’s the newest of the bunch, and still getting acquainted to everyone—occasional screaming arguments still happen, but they’re growing fewer.

Clementine is the youngest, at 18. She’s a runaway, who struggles immensely with her powers. After accidentally using them in front of her family she ran, accidentally crossing Willow and E’s path in a grocery store. Her ability is like putting someone in a trance—when it is activated, those close to her relive their most painful and frightening memories and cannot stop. She is finishing her final year of high school, and is the only one not actively being hunted by the gov (she’s just a missing person’s case, lol). She’s very nervous, and Enoch is like a mentor. No one will never replace her actual family, but the unyielding support, lack of expectations, and the personalities that surround her are helping her come out of her shell. She is baby <3

(Click for better quality)

E’s Crew + Leo & Mick

Leo is (essentially) Enoch’s information broker for Chicago’s nightlife. E has some minor blackmail on Leo (aka: that he ISNT actually an ability user), and so Leo lets him know where he should or shouldn’t be. Enoch also tells him if the feds are closing in on any of their locations/ holdings.

Leo takes great delight in making Enoch meet him at fancy and very public locations, forcing the man to be as uncomfortable as possible. Neither of them particularly want to be there, but it’s that weird veneer of political politeness and fake nicities. Smiling with hatred in their eyes and trying to crush each other’s hands during a handshake.

Mick & Vida are best bros, so the older siblings HAVE to get along. Vida isn’t in Leo and Mick’s gang… but he’s definitely Around™️ and participating™️ in some of the violence. He’s a good post-battle nurse (and definitely DEFINITELY doesn’t have a crush on Mick, why would you say that?)

I hope this answers all your questions!!! But feel free to ask more if I missed anything!!

[weepynymph]

The Gilded Age season one rant

I’m extremely late to the party but I just finished season one and I have thoughts that must be released or I’ll go mad.

Worth watching for the costumes alone I could not stop staring at everyone’s dresses in every scene (and the sets too like wow)

The actors are all great, both the older cast of well known actors and the newer less known actors bring so much to the show and embody their characters so beautifully. They do a lot of the heavy lifting along with the production. 

Unfortunately in the last third of the season I remembered the thing that always bothered me with Julian Fellowes writing back when I was watching Downton Abbey as it was coming out (particularly later seasons) - he sets up these really potentially interesting dynamics and conflicts and then… nothing happens. One by one every interesting conflict just fizzles out or is resolved in the least dramatic way possible. (well, maybe not every one but I came away from the first season with that feeling).

Like things happen, kind of, sometimes, but they are almost always presented and staged in the most underwhelming way possible. Nine times out of ten he chooses to communicate information in scenes outside of the action, or in the least interesting and emotionally resonant way possible. (for instance, Larry walks Marian home after the ball and we learn that she told him about her failed elopement at some point during the evening but we just don’t see that happen?? Why??? I would much much rather have seen her confide in him during the ball rather than have them suddenly reference this hugely emotionally vulnerable moment as having happened offscreen - what a wasted opportunity to showcase their growing closeness!) 

We end up with repetitive dialogue and scenes which communicate the same information as was communicated last episode with no progress made. Scenes would end and I'd be like 'That's it? What was the point of that conversation?' especially towards the end of the season. It's frustrating as there are so many characters and plot lines with potential but hardly anything ever comes of them. I kept holding my breath waiting for something unexpected to happen and it never did. In fact, more often than not I became impatient waiting for the pay off of storylines which I had already predicted (see: Mr Raikes). Big emotional moments, when they do come, sometimes ended up feeling unearned as I didn’t feel like I knew the characters well enough to really feel their struggle (Bridget for instance that revelation came waaaay too early and then felt so swept under the rug??)

The Russells had some really good stuff, they felt like the most active characters in terms of actually shaking things up, being determined and morally grey and tenacious. I enjoyed their story the most because it felt like there were real stakes and opportunities for surprises, the two of them were some of the only characters that did surprise me with how they resolved things or escalated them.

I loved Marian, I think the actress did a wonderful job of playing this compassionate, loving, yet opinionated and headstrong person in this really gentle subtle way - a lesser actor would have really hammed it up and she didn’t and I was really invested in her. 

Peggy too I really enjoyed and I loved their friendship and wish we’d seen more of her storyline especially with the globe. Once they established her working there they just kind of dropped it? In favour of some fairly repetitive scenes for other storylines. I also felt with the revelation of her past we did an awful lot of telling instead of showing - they could have really dropped clues and hinted at her past instead of having her not want to talk about it throughout and then just suddenly dumping it on us.

Loved the aunts, of course, who wouldn’t? Just wish that they’d had them actually do stuff instead of being stuck in their house all the time. Or at least if you're going to have them stuck there all the time, make a point of it, make it more meaningful or thematically resonant.

Also where was Larry??? He should have been a main character and yet he’s so absent?? Hope they actually focus on him next season it was so weird how little of this he was in.

Anyway, I’m going to stick with it because I want to see if next season can deliver on the promise of this season. Plus I’m obviously not missing out on the pure joy of just watching those dresses move the costume team deserves a Nobel prize.

[maggicktouched]

I finished Interview with a Vampire and wanted to share my thoughts. This will not be spoiler free so I will put it under a cut. But if you want my overall opinion if you’re like on the rails about watching this: watch it. It is so much more than I ever thought it would be. I don’t know a single person who has watched it and disliked it. Watch it. Give it a chance. Especially if you’ve ever liked the series.

Also you can watch on AMC+. An app that is genuinely awful but is running a special rn for like two bucks for two months. Not a bad deal for a good show.

I’ve had a very, very long history with the series, with the fandom at multiple times in my life, and with every iteration of the source material. I’ve most of the books multiple times and there was a long portion of my life where I would have claimed that The Vampire Armand was my favorite book, even if it kind of signaled the series flying off the rails.

I really didn’t expect to like this series. Even when I heard it was good I didn’t expect to like it. First and foremost because over the years I’ve become very disenchanted with Anne Rice’s work. Though I loved Armand’s book because I adore the character, I really struggled with Memnoch the Devil. At the time I was a teen and seriously grappling with religious trauma and any reference to the Christian faith triggered some ugly emotions in me. 

Rice also made some writing choices that just didn’t sit well with me. The Tale of the Body Thief has two sexual assaults if I remember correctly. And it wasn’t so much the character doing bad things that I minded as the way Rice framed him and clearly thought of him in spite of him being one of the most morally repulsive character she wrote.

I never made it through Prince Lestat tbh and I don’t even know the name of its sequel right off the top of my head. 

So when I heard there was a new series coming out I was mildly interested but had little hope that it would be decent. 

The pilot was a little bumpy of a watch for me. It highlights one of my only issues going forward with the series and it isn’t necessarily bad, it just means I’m likely not getting one of my favorite parts in the books and that is Daniel. Daniel who is my second favorite vampire in the series and a character that I have a very vivid picture of in my own mind.

The other issue I struggled with initially was Louis being a pimp. That felt so far off of the very reserved/miserable man in the books I often thought of him as. But it actually worked. 

I never loved Louis in the books tbh. I was very neutral about him and often felt sorry for him because he often felt like he was passed from one abusive partner to the next with very little agency of his own. He gets rid of Lestat just to fall prey to Armand just to go back to Lestat a short while later. Maybe it was just my interpretation of him at the time (I was like twenty the last time I read the books---literally a decade ago lol) but he kinda bored me. This Louis is a person I genuinely and wholeheartedly feel for. He feels much more real. Every scene where Daniel would get bitchy with him I’d be like “YOU BE NICE!!!!! HE HAS BEEN THROUGH A LOT!!!!” meanwhile being just as frustrated with him at times.

They made fantastic casting decisions for everyone. Lestat genuinely unnerved me in every scene. Honestly every time he’d look intensely at anyone this tiktok would play in my head but he was genuinely frightening. The scene where he’s talking to Claudia on the train? I felt physically sick listening to him threaten her to come back.

Claudia’s actress was also dead on. And honestly so was her character. I’ve never liked Claudia. I’ve never even felt bad for her even though she was written as a tragic character. But now knowing what happens in the books and knowing where this is going I’m so upset. I genuinely don’t know how they’re going to make me dislike her because for the first time she isn’t some spoiled blood hungry brat but a tortured woman living under the oppressive rule of an abusive man. And I know she’s not a child but Louis is very obviously her father figure/big brother and her having to be the one to save him---her having to stay behind and sacrifice her life and happiness for him---her being the one to have to stand up to Lestat and pull them out like that is a pain that I understand and goddamn do I feel for her. Abuse forces you to grow up way too fast, and in a body that never ages? It’s torment. Her life was torment.

I loved Armand’s actor. I absolutely hated the original IWAV Armand. He’s a great actor, but that was not Armand in my mind. This guy has the young face. He has the sharp features. And he has the menacing presence that Armand always had for me. I went into the series having that twist spoiled for me, so like I did know, but I actually think I preferred it that way. I am extremely excited to see where it goes with Armand, especially as the story goes on, because him being there AS the story is told is a big deal. And Louis and Armand’s love affair in the books isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, so the question is what is going on between them? Have they been together all this time? Or did Louis go TO Armand and admit he wanted to retell his story only to have Armand insist he do it there in his own home? Are they actually in a relationship or is Louis just as trapped in Dubai as he was New Orleans? Is it both? God I’m just so excited to see where Armand goes from here.

I also really really loved the pacing. And that’s something I didn’t think I would like. IWAV is not a book with padding. It is excellently paced. So I really worried when I found out not only was this a series, but it was only like half the fuckin book. I had zero faith that could be done without making it an unnecessary shit show of filler. But I think that the pacing is actually what makes this show so amazing. It gave us the time with each character to see them and who they are in this new adaptation and honestly I liked all of them. It showed us explicitly that Louis is not a reliable narrator, which makes me very curious to see other angles and points of view for characters.

The lighting was really great too. So many shows right now are making the “artistic” choice to turn every goddamn light in the studio off and shoot using a dinosaur nightlight plugged in 50 feet away from the camera rn. You can’t fucking see shit. Game of Thrones did it, so did House of the Dragon, so did any show that has ever been on the CW. And as funny as the memes are I like being able to see shit.

I like that the vampires are a little more feral than they are in the books. 

I liked Louis’ family. The part with his brother worried me at first, because disorders like that are often not shown in a kind light, but in the end I think they did a decent job. He was a tragic character and there was always the mystery of “did his mental illness kill him or did Lestat” and honestly I still am not certain Lestat wasn’t lying when he said that he didn’t kill him.

I liked the hints toward characters like Marius and Nikki. 

Most of all I loved how unabashedly gay this was. It’s what we have all wanted.

I am still disappointed about Daniel. I was disappointed in the original movie with him too. That’s just not what Daniel looks like in my mind. Him being older makes me wonder if they’re going to cross his story over with David and I won’t enjoy that. 

While Lestat/Louis was most people’s fav toxic couple, mine was Daniel and Armand. Two characters who were both horrifically broken people in a shit storm of Armand’s making because Armand doesn’t know how fucking else to love anyone because that’s how he was shown love by Marius from the start. Daniel’s misery and ultimately his madness. Even after being transformed he was always so painfully human to me. I always wanted them to somehow find a way to be ok on their own and come together again later in life, and I have heard that it does eventually happen in Prince Lestat and the sequel. So it doesn’t look like I’m going to have that, and if I do it’s going to look very different than how I personally wanted it, but that’s ok. It’s a personal preference.

But yeah. Currently those are all the feelings I wanted to get out. And they’re mostly overwhelmingly positive. I can hardly wait for another season and I hope everyone watches this show and we get more and more seasons to come.

I might even watch the Mayfair show. And I’ve never even read/liked those books.

[allen309]

Happy New Years Everyone!! 🎉

It’s the start of a new year. I don’t like making New Year’s resolutions because I can never stick to one thing at a time, especially for an entire year. However, I think I’ll continue to focus on my mental health and continue making personal achievements.

This year has been a really good year for me, especially mentally. A few highlights from 2023:

1. Started a YouTube channel:

* I still have no plans to grow my channel. It’s just something to do for fun. I’m hoping to get better at editing and making my content better.

2. I finally got my driver’s license and made a few small road trips around my home state this past summer

3. Went to Fan Expo in Boston with my friend.

* While at Fan Expo I met the voice actress that voiced the original Dora. The meet and greet was fun, but no one cared about Dora. Basically, Peter Cullen, who voiced Optimus Prime, was about two tables over and his line was backed up. There were a few people who passed by and would excitedly make a comment about “oh it’s Dora!”, but the people would just continue walking by to get in line for Peter Cullen. Overall, Dora wasn’t in a good location. She was placed next to three big names; Richard Horvitz, Brandon Rogers, and Peter Cullen. (I might upload the video that I took in a different post to show the line difference)

4. Got back into re-exploring and trying to write my OC’s:

* Even though there was an attempt at writing something down; I just never finish writing. I’m still not sure if it’s me not liking my writing or if it’s just ADHD procrastination.

* I still enjoy my rather large fictional world and characters, but as an autistic bean I just struggle to get what’s going on inside my head down on paper. My friend sat and read through several lengthy phone texts last last year (2022) that were just about each character, and she introduced me to picrew to at least provide a visual for a few characters.

+I have Pinterest. Maybe I’ll start an OC board for each character to show their likes and such. It’ll definitely provide more options for characters compared to picrew. Also, hoping to cosplay a few characters on my YouTube channel, but that’s still up in the air.

5. Made a Tumblr account:

* I sent a few Ask Questions to some people on Tumblr and even left a comment on other people’s posts…although a few Ask were sent anonymously, and pre-written several times on my phone notes before committing to sending. But with my mild social anxiety, it’s a big step for me, so I’m counting it as a small achievement.

* I even made two mutuals on Tumblr, which are my first two official mutuals, besides my two friends that are on Tumblr. Hopefully, I can make more mutuals on Tumblr. I’m really enjoying meeting people outside the small town that I live in.

6. I also made friends with my friend’s cousin. (Having two Filipino friends, they like throwing parties and hosting. Which is fun, but karaoke is still not an option if you go, even if it’s just three people at the party)

7. I also had a great year in Splatoon. I’m still mostly playing Turf War, and occasionally play anarchy splat zones. Maybe this year I’ll try the other anarchy modes. The other anarchy modes seem pretty straight forward; rainmaker is really the only confusing one.

* I’m still kinda playing Splatoon solo. My friend left me for TF2, and the digital friends that I made through Splatoon mostly only play turf war, and Salmon Run. There’s no way of communicating, so I feel nervous joining anyone during turf war because I don’t know if they already have friends playing, especially if they make a room.

* December was my first time playing some Salmon Run alone. People are much more friendlier and more welcoming than I allow myself to think; both on Splatoon and Tumblr. The team that I was randomly assigned to would just vibe while we all waited for each new round

* I have a personal record in splat zones that I haven’t been able to break since March. My team did lose unfortunately

[thoughtsaladblog]

The eye of the beholder

Another night, another conundrum. So I’ve been in deep contemplation...- ok, I’ve been in contemplation at certain points of the day, when in fact I should be finishing off those damn report sheets, and I’ve come to the realization that part of the reason why Lewis lost interest was the bad sex. Ok fine! I realized that a while back.. But I realized why the sex was bad. I mean, I don’t in any way think I’m a diva in the sack, but I also know I’m not generally bad either. So why the awkward sex as of late? Mainly coz I’ve lost confidence in myself. 

I mean just the other day Dowaan asked to hook up- and while to be honest I’m not really feeling that for several other reasons- I didn’t want to even say yes to try it out because I was feeling overly self-conscious. Why? Well, coz the girl is fat... In fact, the girl’s the heaviest she’s ever been. If that doesn’t chip away at your self esteem, I dunno what else can. I see myself in the mirror and all I notice is my prominent double chin, and then I pull my arm forward and it’s all it takes not to cut away at my flesh with a meat cleaver. When I don’t like the way I look, how can I expect anyone else to? 

I mean, let’s be honest. Men are visual creatures. They spend majority of their life watching porn and stalking models and actresses. They want to see sexy while having sex- not Adele during her album 19 era. I can’t blame them- I want to see sexy too when having sex. I’d be lying if I said a man’s untrimmed beard or hairy chest doesn’t turn me off. But another something I realised- with regards to my subpar performance was that, good sex is at least 60% dependent on how confident we are in ourselves. If your attention is being diverted to worrying about turtling, looking like an upside down hippopotamus and figuring out which angle to face so you look less like Mona Lisa (no, she isn’t beautiful), you’re spending less time enjoying the sex and even less time making sure he enjoys it. You cannot make someone else feel good if you don’t feel good. It’s simply that. So I suppose the reality that I’ve come to face is that, while I remain looking like Mona Lisa’s uglier step-sister I’ll never be able to have good sex.

Now, as for the blatantly obvious remedy to this (losing weight), that’s a post for another day, because frankly, my recent attempts have only led to failure and I’m struggling to get started. It of course doesn’t help that it randomly fucking rains cats and dogs in a way that turns my classroom and bedroom roof into Niagara falls and the floor into the Castlereagh Reservoir, thus banishing me from my own home and setting all my weekly plans on fire. Yes, these are in fact excuses for the fact that I simply am not trying hard enough and lack the resolve and motivation to follow through on what it takes. I had that traction at one point- I only wish I could get it back. 

Although this be for genuine and also somewhat sinful reasons- Jesus take the wheel! 

[juicyquinn]

joseph quinn x actress fem!reader

can you do when joseph and reader are both filming for different movies and it starts to conflict with their relationship and they start having fights which starts to affect how they both work. many people and the media start to catch on and they start getting asked questions in interviews and from paps

yesss i can !

publicity stunt

tw // cussing, drinking, gaslighting, name calling, arguing.

“so, joseph you & y/n are both currently working on different projects. tell me, how are you guys finding time for each other with your busy schedules?” an interviewer sat up in his seat. the cameras were everywhere & the lights were bright and hot. joseph answered with articulation, “it’s not hard, we stay in touch & see each other frequently. she’s actually here now!” joseph pointed through the cameras directly at you & blew a kiss towards you. “that’s awesome, it’s gotta be a struggle to find that balance though right?” the interviewer eased in, “what’s the secret?” joseph laughed & made eye contact with you, “unconditional love,” he panned back to the man, “and patience of course… it doesn’t always work out perfectly but we’re both patient.” the man smiled at joseph, “you two are lovely!”

6 months had passed & you & joseph have only seen eachother a handful of times. you were talking/texting regularly but it’s turned into shorter, stagnant responses over time. you had just filmed the final take for this scene & was ready to see joseph. you two had planned this dinner two weeks ago after he cancelled the other one. after the long week you had you desperately needed this time with him. your car was waiting for you once you finished talking & grabbing your things. as soon as you got into the car you decided to text joe. *hey still on for tonight? xx* a bit of time passed before he replied, *of course love, see you soon :) x* you put your phone away for the rest of the ride. as soon as you got home you decided to shower & get ready. it’s been almost a month since you actually seen & get to have more than 10 minutes of time with joseph so you wanted to wear something that he couldn’t wait to rip off. "little black dress of course." you held the revealing piece up to your body in front of the mirror & smirked. once you got your hair and makeup done you slipped on the strapless dress that hugged your figure. your red bottom louis vuitton’s seemed to call out your name. your car was arriving soon so you took it upon yourself to give joseph a call, to check in. it rung all the way through to voicemail so you texted. *about to leave here in 5, i’ll see you at dinner!* a black suburban was buzzed through your gate so you put your phone in your purse, grabbed your jacket & made your way out of the house. knowing how busy joseph is you decided not to blow his phone up, didn’t want to ruin the night before it started. your security, dillon, was in the front seat next to the driver. “how’re you doing today miss y/l/n? excited for dinner with joe?” he beamed, dillon was always so sweet and supportive. you thought of him more as a best friend than your body guard. “i’m good! very excited. it’s been way too long.” the excitement oozed as the driver pulled off.

the vehicle pulled up in front of the elegant restaurant. the sun was starting to set, it looked gorgeous. the sight made you even more excited for tonight. paparazzi seen the tinted windows & automatically knew someone important was in there. dillon turned around in his seat to face you, “they’re like roaches, everywhere all the time.” he rolled his eyes, “are you ready miss?” you put your blacked out shades on, “ready!” dillon got out of the vehicle holding his arm in front of the paps to make room for your door to open. as soon as it opened the flashing & yelling started. “y/n! how’s filming for Point Blank going?” one yelled while being shoved to the side by another pap, “hey y/n! where’s joseph at? haven’t seen you two together in awhile.” another interrupts him, “yeah! did you guys break up, finally?” your ears perked up when he said 'finally' & you rolled your eyes. dillon got you out of the car & pushed through the paparazzi to eventually get you inside of the restaurant. a waiter asked for the reservation name & you quickly said “Quinn.” he pulled two menus out & motioned towards the seating area. “if you can just follow me.” he lead you through the perfectly lit dining room to a secluded booth. your stomach dropped when you didn’t see joseph already seated. “can i interest you in a glass of sauvignon blanc?” he asked while holding a big bottle & a wine glass. you sat down, “of course! thank you.” you flashed a nice smile to try & hide the fact that you were a bit hurt. the waiter poured you a glass of the wine & took a step back, “your server will be with you soon. enjoy!” you nodded back in assurance before he walked away. you grabbed your phone & called joseph, no answer. again, voicemail. you figured he’s running late so you left him a text. *just got seated. call me when you’re on your way! excited to see you, hun xx* you set your phone down & took a sip of your wine, waiting.

“are you ready to order ma’am?” the waiter circled back around a few moments later. “i’d like to wait please, if that’s okay?” you said while swirling your wine in the glass & taking the last drink. the server quickly filled it again as you nodded in appreciation. about 45 minutes passed. text after text & phone call after phone call. still no answer. at this point you felt like you were being stood up. you had a few more glasses of wine than you’d have liked so you decided it’s time to go home. you called dillon and told him you were ready & he was already waiting by the entrance for you. there weren’t any paps outside thankfully, it’s gotten pretty late so you’re hoping they found someone else to berate or just went home, doubtful on that one though. you paid the tab & dillon ran in front of you to open the door. as you two walked outside another black suburban pulled up in behind your vehicle. of course, out hopped joseph. he looked so unfazed it was disrespectful. “hi my darling, i’m so sorry i’m late. filming went past time a bit and-” he stopped as you interrupted him, “save it, joe. i texted & called plenty of times. you could’ve had SOMEONE call me, instead i looked stupid sitting in that fancy place all dressed up by myself.” joseph’s whole demeanor changed when he seen you visibly upset. “it’s been a whole month joseph, we had this planned for weeks after you cancelled the last date.” joseph took a few stops closer to you & grabbed your waist to pull you closer, “from the bottom of my heart, im sorry my love. production was having errors, i should’ve texted you.” you almost believed him until the smell of liquor rolled off his tongue along with those words & your stomach turned. “you have to be fucking kidding me. your breath reeks of liquor & you’re gonna tell me you were stuck filming?” you pushed joe off of you & he stood back & rubbed his forehead, “it was only a few drinks, y/n. don’t worry i’ll be fine.” your jaw dropped in amazement, “you think i give a damn how many drinks you had? you lied about what you were doing when WE had plans. or did you just forget about your own girlfriend?” you were visibly getting angry with joseph. “so what i had a couple drinks, y/n! these hours are stressful.” joseph whined. it really set you off how he pulled the stressful hours card, knowing you have the exact same job & bad hours as well. “you’re an asshole dude.” the argument went on for a bit longer, getting heated at times. finally, you put your hand up to his face & walked away towards your car that was waiting. dillon had the door open & shut in seconds. “drive, please.” you pushed your words out, trying to hold back the tears. it was a quiet drive home. once you finally arrived, you kicked your heels off & got into bed, full face, dress on and all. you honestly just wanted to go to bed & forget tonight even happened. you opened twitter just to mindlessly scroll but instead found your notifications blown up. the first notification you see is headlined “y/f/n stood up by joe quinn tonight” with photos attached. in the first couple of photos it was you walking into the restaurant & sitting at the table by yourself. the next few were long distance shots of you & joseph mid arguement. you didn’t realize how heated it actually got until you seen it from an outside point of view. you sighed & locked your phone, throwing it next to you. your eyes began to water so you shut them tight & rolled over to force yourself to go to sleep.

8:32am, you woke up to your doorbell being spammed & 10 missed calls from joseph. you decided to be petty & make him wait longer, just like he made you wait. you changed out of your dress into a large t-shirt & threw your hair up. you made your way downstairs to open the door. joseph stood tall over you, “look, i’m sorry for lying to you. i shouldn’t have. i did go have a few drinks after texting you back that i’d see you soon. i lost track of time. please forgive me.” he pretty much begged. “honestly i have nothing to say to you at the moment, i’m mad. i’m pissed & hurt. we barely speak & seeing you is getting harder & harder. i get that we’re both busy with our projects but i’m putting more of an effort than you are joseph & it sucks.” your eyes watered, you felt like you guys were slowly growing apart. “don’t you think you’re overreacting? it was one dinner.” he sighed. you were taken back that he had the nerve to say that. “one dinner? one fucking dinner? what about the other dates you cancelled last minute. were you drinking then too? what about our conversations? you act like you couldn’t be bothered to message me back joseph. i’m always the one calling first to ask you how your day was. the past 4 months have been nothing but paparazzi & interviewers asking if we’re still together or not,” you fully reamed him not giving him a chance to speak, “they must be seeing something i wasn’t but now i see it. leave me alone until you figure out whether you want to be with me or not.” joseph couldn’t even get a word out before you slammed the door in his face.

another month passed. you focused hard on your movie & it was finally finished. joseph was in the last stretch of finishing his. he tried texting and calling here & there but it felt so strained you didn’t have the energy to reply. tonight you had your big movie premiere & it was gonna be the first time you seen joseph since everything happened, if he even decides to show up. “i love him so much but he lied straight to my face. lied about something he didn’t even need to lie about. he made me feel like shit the entire course of those months.” you vented to your friend olivia, who was also your makeup artist, as she did your foundation. “babe, you two are movie stars. it’s going to happen where you two get busy & barely talk. it’s up to you two to figure out whether you want to keep fighting about it or if you want to get through it.” she said softly as you played with your rings. “i want to, i don’t want this to ruin us.” your eyes began to water. “aht aht! no crying,” olivia grabbed a qtip to soak up the tears before the dripped, “i did too good for you to go and wash it all away!” she turned you towards the mirror to show you your finished face. “ya look gorgeous my friend. you two will figure it out.” olivia kissed the side of your head & you smiled. once you were completely ready & got some pictures for social media out of the way it was time to walk the carpet. you & joseph always walked the carpets together for your premiers/award shows. you felt extremely lonely. standing at the beginning of the carpet everyone was faced towards you already, cameras & lights pointed. you nervously took a step but before you could go any farther you felt a hand gently pressed to your lower back. you turned in surprise to see joseph’s dimpled cheeks & brown eyes. “you came?” your voice broke. “of course, i would never miss any of your moments.” you took a deep breath in & out nervously, “thank you joe, so much. i needed you here.” he leaned in to kiss you on the cheek & you felt your face burn up. “let’s get you on this carpet, love.” once everyone seen you two on the carpet together they went crazy. they asked questions about whether you two were broken up or not, still friends, etc. it only just made you think more of the conversation you & joseph needed to have. “we need to talk.” you whispered to joe as you reached the end of the carpet. he nodded in agreement. before you two even took the last step off of the carpet he grabbed your hand & made you follow him to a secluded area. “look joe-” you hesitated as joe interrupted, “no don’t say anything. i am so sorry for hurting you, for making you feel unimportant. i genuinely don’t know what got into me. i was being an asshole to you & you didn’t deserve that.” joseph paused, “god, y/n. i’m so madly in love with you. i can’t lose you over this.” your eyes began to water. “you’re the love of my life. we will figure out something to make it work. all of this shit wouldn’t be worth it if you weren’t doing it with me.” by the time he finished you had tears streaming down your face, not even caring about your makeup. “i love you so much joe. i couldn’t possibly do this without having you by my side. we will figure this out.” joe’s eyes were watery, “don’t be a crybaby now, quinn.” his laugh filled the air, “shush look at you! you better call olivia.” he wiped a black mascara tear from dripping off of your chin onto your dress. in the same motion he tilted your chin up to make your eyes meet his. without missing a beat your lips met for the first time in months, feeling like no time has passed since you last kissed him. the kiss lasted for a few long seconds. you pulled away remembering you still needed to get your makeup fixed before you two went out there. “i have to find olivia, can i meet you at the table?” you ran your fingers through his curly hair as he still held onto you, “of course, love. i’ll be waiting for you.” he snuck another kiss in before letting go of you. your heart felt so full again, beating out of your chest as you walked away from him.

you found olivia & got everything fixed before you went back to the main area to find joseph. his face lit up as soon as he seen you & waved you his way. everything felt so perfect & good. you sat down beside joe & he leaned in to peck you on the lips, leaving you with a blushed smile. the premier was great, so many friends & people you considered family. you & joseph had your stuff figured out & you couldn’t be happier. once the director of the movie started speaking joseph grabbed your hand and squeezed it 3 times, meaning ‘i love you’. so you did the same back.

a/n: hi omg sorry it’s so long, it also took me v long to finish it bc i had work but i rly hope u enjoy :p xx

[honeyedmilks]

https://instagram.com/p/BZghgWdHSW3/

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hi makenzie! i’m currently looking for some good fantasy, do you have any specific favorites from your recent reads? 🤔

oh BOY do I!

Jade City (Fonda Lee) - the first of a ROLICKING fantasy novel unlike anything I've ever read before. the setting is stunning: the post-war island of Kekon, where technology (radio and telephones, cars and airplanes, etc) lives side by side with a magical jade that the native population has harnessed for generations to enhance their natural abilities to become fearsome combatants. the series begins with three adult siblings - Lan, Hilo, and Shae - struggling to find their places within their famed grandfather's legacy, and follows them for years as international conflict blooms and the family grows. Lee is BRUTAL writer who will kick you in the gut out of absolutely nowhere with some of her twists, but goddamn you will never be bored. I haven't read the final book yet but my hopes are HIGH.

City of Brass (S.A. Chakraborty) - also the first in a trilogy, this time centering around a secret city of djinn in 19th century Egypt. it starts as a fun romp as Nari, an adult orphan with inexplicable healing abilities that I'm sure won't be relevant to the plot at all, no sir, becomes entangled with an ancient warrior (bastard) and a naive prince (best boy, never done anything wrong in his life) and elevates into an absolutely epic political fantasy that I was heartbroken to finish. this isn't strictly "recent" but I really cannot recommend the trilogy enough!

Kaikeyi (Vaishnavi Patel) - a standalone retelling of the story of Kaikeyi, the wicked stepmother figure of the Sanskrit epic the Ramayana. this book is some of the most fun I had with a doorstopper novel all year; Patel strikes a really good balance between political maneuverings, interpersonal developments, and sprinkling in reimagined Hindu myths and legends. Kaikeyi's a blast, give it a chance!

Siren Queen (Nghi Vo) - I'm a Nghi Vo fan first and a person second, so there's no way I wasn't going to mention her most recent release. Siren Queen presents a fantastical alternate history where the rise of Hollywood film studios was presided over by sinister fey creatures, with each studio paying homage to eerie eldritch creatures in order to thrive. actors and actresses are bought and sold, changeling children roam the lots, and anyone who doesn't play along can be replaced with an uncanny replica. among all of this danger our heroine sets out to become a star, set on avoiding the stereotypical roles thrust at other Chinese-Americans. she finds success as the monstrous Siren Queen, but you KNOW she's not going to get a straightforward happily ever after in an industry that literally eats people alive.

The Jasmine Throne (Tasha Suri) - also the first in a series, the Jasmine Throne sees Totally Ordinary No Dramatic Backstory Here maid Priya ordered to look after Malini, an exiled princess banished to a haunted tower far from her tyrannical brother's court. Malini quickly reveals herself to be a much sharper political schemer than her sickly demeanor would suggest, and she enlists Priya in her plans to facilitate her own escape and overthrow her brother. this one is ripe with BODY HORROR PLANT MAGIC!

The City We Became (N.K. Jemisin) - we're once again stretching the bounds of a "recent" read, but the sequel just came out so now is the perfect time! this is a contemporary urban fantasy that asks the pressing question: what if cities that become old and powerful enough come to life, embodied in a single person who must represent and protect that city? and what if New York just had a big messy magical birth, just as its in danger from an otherworldly threat? great news - the five boroughs have also found avatars, and they're teeming up to save New York the person and New York the city.

[read-bi-lina]

My goal during pride month was to post solely about LGBTQ+ books throughout the month but that didn’t end up happening. Thankfully, pride isn’t for just a month so I still plan to share plenty of LGBTQ+ titles with you, starting now.

wlw historical fiction:

Carol (formerly titled The Price of Salt) by Patricia Highsmith: It’s not one of my favorites but I’m glad I read this book as it’s one of the classics for the LGBTQ genre and it’s based off the author’s own life. In the book, Therese begins to realize her lesbian identity when she meets Carol, who struggles to keep custody of her daughter as a queer woman in 1950s USA. TW: blackmail

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid: I expected to like this book but I underestimated just how much because when I finished it I literally gasped and said, “wow…that was such a good book… amazing”. I fell in love with it and I immediately knew I’d have to get my own physical copy for keeps. In the book, Monique struggles with her divorce and her career as a journalist. She wants to make a name for herself and the opportunity arises when Evelyn Hugo, an actress from Hollywood’s golden age, requests an interview with her and only her. Monique is confounded because until then, Evelyn’s had a reputation for being recluse and refusing to speak with the press. During the interview, Monique learns about Evelyn’s seven husbands, her bisexual awakening, and even something about herself. TW: domestic violence/domestic abuse, alcohol abuse/drug abuse, misogyny/sexism, sexual harassment/sexual assault, death/grief, homophobia/queermisia, threatened outing/forced outing, blackmail/manipulation

Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo: This book was real and beautiful. I had to buy a physical copy to add to my bookshelf. The story follows a Chinese American teenage girl living in 1950s Chinatown San Francisco as she discovers her lesbian identity and dreams of a future in the space program. It tackles family trauma, lost friendships, stereotypes, and the struggles of the queer community in 1950s USA. This book is a must-read, go check it out. TW: homophobia/lesbophobia, queermisia, racism/xenophobia, deportation/threat of deportation, death/loss

wlw sports fiction:

(Can someone pleaseee write a wlw romance centered around ice hockey??)

She Drives Me Crazy by Kelly Quindlen: I’m not crazy about this book (sorry, I had to). The story follows Scottie, a high school basketball player struggling to get over her ex, who she just loses the first game of the season to. When Scottie feels like things can’t get worse for her she gets into a fender bender with the head cheerleader, Irene, in the school parking lot. Now she must give Irene lifts until her car is repaired and, oh yeah, did I forget to mention they can’t stand each other? Despite the fact, Scottie comes up with a plan to make her ex jealous and get her back: pretend to date Irene. Warning: stop reading if you don’t want spoilers! This book was ok, I didn’t dislike it but I just couldn’t fall in love with it. It follows the enemies-to-lovers trope but I thought the enemies part lasted longer than the getting to know each other and fall for each other part. It just seemed like it didn’t take much for them to fall in love and yet I wasn’t convinced the chemistry was there. There were some cute parts in the book but I thought the grand gesture Scottie does for Irene at the end was cheesy. It was too much. What I think the author meant to be a cute scene for the readers to gush over was just cringeworthy to me.

Like Other Girls by Britta Lundin: I was a little worried I wasn’t going to like this book but I was pleasantly surprised. It’s about Mara, an athletic teenager who gets kicked off her high school basketball team after she hits her teammate. For her coach to reconsider her spot on the team Mara must prove she can be part of a team again. She tries out for the school’s volleyball team before she ultimately decides that volleyball is too “girly” for her and she tries out for the football team instead. Because, why not? She’s good at it, she enjoys it, and she likes being around guys better than girls. Little did she know the impact she would have for becoming the first girl on the team. I thought this book would be all about bashing femme girls, and it does start off that way. But let me tell you, I showed up for the character development and Mara (or Britta Lundin rather) delivered. Mara’s story also includes her struggle with her family’s acceptance (or lack thereof) of her identity and interests, as well as a disingenuous friendship. TW: sexual harassment, sexism and intolerance

Home Field Advantage by Dahlia Adler: Author of Cool for the Summer, Dahlia Adler does it again. Amber is a closeted high school cheerleader who dreams of becoming head cheerleader and Jaq Jack, short for Jaqueline, is the out and proud new girl in school. Oh, and she’s also the new quarterback after the last QB passed away. Amber is one of two people accepting of the change and while she’s supposed to be helping her squad and the football team to sabotage Jack, the two of them get close. Amber then questions what she cares about more, being head cheerleader and keeping her identity a secret, or Jack. TW: death/grief, sexism, bullying, homophobia/queermisia, threatened outing/blackmail

Catch and Cradle by Katia Rose: After a messy breakup that somehow effected her whole lacrosse team, Becca comes up with an idea in order to prevent history from repeating itself; an unofficial rule that teammates can’t date. But then Hope joins the team and the two find it harder and harder to resist the notion that maybe rules are meant to be broken. I thought Hope and Becca had good chemistry and the representation in this book doesn’t stop at sexual orientation or gender identity, because Hope struggles with dyslexia. However, this book also has unnecessary drama and fondue level cheesiness.

Queer contemporary romance series:

Ashley Blake Herring vs Alexandria Bellefleur, whose work do I prefer?

Easy. Blake takes the cake with Delilah Green Doesn’t Care. Her next additions, Astrid Parker Doesn’t Fail and Iris Kelly Doesn’t Date haven’t been released yet but I’m immensely excited for them. I love Delilah Green Doesn’t Care so much I’m proud to have my own paperback copy sitting on my bookshelf. I plan to write more in-depth about the series as the next two books drop. They have big shoes to fill so hopefully I love them as much as (or better yet, even more than) the first in the series!

When reading Alexandria Bellefleur’s series, I accidentally skipped her second book, Hang the Moon. I got confused and I thought that was her third book but that’s actually Count Your Lucky Stars, which I did read. When I realized my mistake, I decided not to read Hang the Moon because I already knew how it ended after reading the books out of order. I also lost the desire to finish the series because I didn’t love the other two books. That’s not to say I disliked Written in the Stars or Count Your Lucky Stars. There were parts in both I enjoyed (more so in Count Your Lucky Stars, except for an unnecessary fight) and I did love the depicted friendships, but overall they didn’t leave me with the desire to add them to my bookshelf.

That’s it for now but I’ll be back to post more recommendations/reviews on other titles. In the meantime, please let me know if I’ve left out any important trigger warnings or if you have any recommendations for me in these genres. Thank you!

[mirambles]

Currently Watching Kdrama Update:

1. Extraordinary Attorney Woo: I haven’t voiced my thoughts on this drama here because it got popular too quick and fans of the drama were unable to accept any criticism of this drama. I guess the euphoria has died down given how this drama has fallen into the formulaic Kdrama trap forgetting what it has started out to do. The writer is completely confused.

It was supposed to tell us Woo’s story, how autistic people face discrimination and how she grows as a lawyer tackling the personal & professional challenges. The legal cases were very good until episode 6 and then they went downhill. Then they introduced too many tracks - second lead romance & love triangle, back story for the mean guy, boss’s illness. But the worst bit of the drama and something that has made me extremely uncomfortable is making Tae SuMi a villain - she was literally forced to have a child she did not want. She has full rights to not want a child - given how women’s rights are being attacked all over, what the writer has done here is great disservice to the women and their choice!

The romance was the sweetest part of this drama and even that has been ruined with the typical family and breakup melodrama. I honestly couldn’t care now if Woo and JunHo end up together or not, it’s so Kdrama cliche to cause unnecessary breakups. I loved the girl friendships and Kang Ki Young, his dynamic with Woo is one of my favourite bits. But they reduced both these aspects so much post episode 8, that I have nothing to look forward to in this drama now.

I even have my views on EunBin’s portrayal of an autistic character, and even though I like EunBin, I haven’t been able to connect to her performance, because autistic characters in other dramas / series touched me more - Move To Heaven and As We See It being my favourite ones. So conclusion , my mixed feelings in Ep1-3 went to liking the drama in Ep4-6, and post that it’s just been downhill for me. No where close to making it to my Top20 or will rewatch many times lists.

2. Goblin : I finally caved in and started watching this drama to understand why it is so popular. I’m 6 episodes in this drama and I’m struggling. The lead pair romance is a no-go for me. The female lead is shown to be 18-19, a high school senior. The ML (ignoring he is actually a zillion years old) is around his mid30s. I wouldn’t be fussed if a 20 something adult was dating a 40+ , but she is in school. How on earth are people swooning over their romance? Also Kim GoEun who am generally neutral to, is unbearable to watch as the cutesy teenager. She is not pulling this off. Everyone raves about the bromance and yes it is good, but I have watched far more KDramas where bromance was far better. LDW has only one expression on his face. Gong Yoo is literally saving this drama, but him a middle aged man falling for a school girl doesn’t make me want to watch his romantic scenes at all. I don’t think I will finish this, or probably skip a lot and watch to see how it all ends.

3. Chicago Typewriter : Only managed 5 episodes and I have liked what I saw except the actress who has not impressed me at all. She is rather expressionless. Yoo Ah In is stealing the show in every frame and scene he comes on screen. The soundtrack is lovely, and the story is very intriguing. I really need to get cracking on this one.

4. If You Wish Upon Me : I’m very biased to Ji Chang Wook, but post Suspicious Partner I have not liked any of his dramas. LoveStruck in the City was good in parts, but he really needs a good stylist, the panache, the head turning persona from Healer and SP has been missing for me. I’m not sure I like his look in this drama, but in the first 2 episodes his acting has been top notch. He has nailed every scene and his dynamic with Sung Dong Il is superb. The female lead is cute and doesn’t take shit from anyone. Anyways too early to judge - the premise seems like a blend of Move to Heaven and Chocolate. I had liked both the dramas - very hopeful and positive, despite the grim subject matter they tackled. Let’s see how this one goes.

[mycatismyeditor]

Supergirl episode idea my brain won't give up on...

So because I’m a huge story nerd and like fixing things I think about Supergirl a lot, because that show was a mess and the greatest waste of potential I think I’ve seen… possibly ever. Anyway, I’ve had this idea about an episode that won't go away so I’m sharing it here in the hopes it stops coming to me at 3am and I can finally get some sleep.

I feel like an episode like this, one where the focus was on Kara and her emotions and letting her talk, could have been useful in terms of character development and I think Melissa is more than capable as a dramatic actress of holding our attention without needing a million other things going on around her and an episode like this would have given her a chance to actually show that as Supergirl. I also think it would have been a good chance to show some actual processing of emotions and issues without it being about fighting someone (because really too much of that show was about fighting someone over actual story and character development).

So this idea is set early S3, when Kara is struggling with her identity and not wanting to be Kara and all that jazz. Please note this is not an attack on the writers or suggesting what they used in S3 instead was bad or anything like that, this is just an example of the kind of stories and character based episodes I really wish we’d gotten on the show because honestly I haven't even been able to finish watching most of it as the writing is just so... honestly boring. But I love the characters so I keep trying.

Also it's a bit long so sorry about that.

......

We open with Kara having just done some kind of fight and the DEO are collecting like a Fort Rozz detainee or something. Have Alex say something about how that’s all wrapped up and suggesting Kara get some rest because she’s really been putting in extra hours and it’s getting late. Kara saying she’s just going to do a short flight before she goes home. Alex reluctantly agrees. Maybe have Alex (or possibly Winn over coms) say something about reports of some hikers setting off fireworks in the National park.

Result, Kara is flying over the mountains around National City and then her powers falter and then she tries to recover but not very well. She barely manages to give Alex a warning before she crashes into a cliff having blown out her powers.

Her earpiece is destroyed in the crash and she’s a little beaten up but otherwise okay. She sighs and takes out her phone and tries to call Alex (no service) then sees a picture of her and Mon-el as her phone background. She starts breaking down a bit her head in her hands tears coming and then there’s a voice calling from somewhere nearby.

“Hello! Is anyone there? Please, I need help!”

Kara of course follows the voice and goes into a cave to find a rock climber trapped in the cave partway down on a ledge under a small rockslide with a large boulder pinning his legs.

“Supergirl!” he says excitedly. “Wow, am I glad to see you. Can you get me out?”

Then Kara has a bit of an extension to her breakdown because she looks at this guy who’s evidently trapped suddenly so excited thinking he’s saved. She gets down to him and tearfully has to tell him she’s so sorry she actually blew out her powers so she’s only human right now.

He just looks at her and sighs.

“Well… that sucks,” he said giving her a smile. “How’d you blow out your powers?”

“I uh… I haven’t really… slept in… like a week.”

He looked at her and nodded slowly. Maybe here she notices he's shivering and so shifts to be holding him and wrap him in her cape or something to keep him warm.

“Well uh, since it seems we’re both stuck here why don’t you tell me why you haven't slept in a week.”

Kara lets out a surprised laugh and wipes at her tears.

“You want me to tell you about my problems right now?”

He nodded.

“Well I think my problems are pretty obvious,” he motioned to the rocks covering his lower half. “Big rocks stuck on my legs, slowly bleeding out. Yours seem much less obvious and far more interesting, come on tell me all about it. I’ve been told I’m a good listener. At least that’s what my wife says, she always tells me Pete you might drive me mad but at least I know you’ll listen as I complain about it.”

He gives her a bright smile and Kara thinks about it. She looks at him and then the rocks and back again.

“Normally I wouldn’t rush you, but I don’t wanna pass out from blood loss halfway through something important, you might think I’m being rude.”

“How can you joke about that?” Kara asked horrified. “Maybe I can move the rocks and free you and-”

“And I’ll die much faster,” he said giving her another smile. “Some of this is actually stopping me from bleeding out. And before you suggest going for help the nearest person is a three hour hike, and I’ll be dead by then.”

Kara looked at him alarmed.

“I’m a pretty experienced climber, not that it looks like it right now but…” He sighed. “I know I’m dying Supergirl, but... I’d rather not die alone in the cold and dark.”

Moment of quiet then another smile from the guy and he pats her hand.

“So come on, tell me what’s going on. I promise I won’t tell anyone else. And I could uh, I could really use a distraction.”

Kara looks at him and then sighs and nods.

“So I… I had a boyfriend. And I had to uh… he was…”

She took a deep breath.

“He was so annoying! He would never do what I told him and he was always getting into trouble and I would have to drag him out of it and it was so…” She made a strangling motion with her hands. “Like I got him a job, at my workplace, and he of course got fired on day one. Not, get this, not for sleeping with one of my coworkers in the printing room but because he gave her all his work to do.”

Pete laughs and then so does Kara

“Like seriously. I…”

She starts to cry.

“He was so… sweet. And he was… he tried. He was awful when we first met and then he, he changed. He was hopeless at it sometimes but he kept trying and he made me laugh as much as he drove me crazy and I just… I loved him. I really loved him. And then I had to send him away because he was a Daxamite, the Prince of the Daxamites! Which he didn’t tell me! No, he kept that a secret so when they demanded his return I thought he was going to his execution or something so I…”

Cut away to Alex and the DEO desperately trying to find where Kara is to save her. They’re all stressing out. Alex most of all. J’onn being the best space dad reassuring Alex and promising her they’ll find her eventually. Winn desperately trying to use some advanced modelling to work out her flight path and it not really working which frustrates Alex. Maybe he’s trying to trace her radiation signature but because she’s blown out her powers it’s not really working so they’re trying to find her phone and using advanced hacking into satellites. Lot’s of ultra technical advanced stuff and none of it’s working. (Maybe have a side thing of instead of trying to do something technical the best idea would be to actually get out there in force and manually look becuse the damage to the cliff is pretty obvious.)

Most of the episode is Kara just talking with Pete. Firstly about her relationship with Mon-el and her unresolved feelings and grief at losing him and the fears she has about where he’s going to end up since she sent him away. Maybe a few small connections to her trauma from seeing her planet explodeand being stuck in the Phantom zone.

Then she asks about why he’s down there alone against all cave diving rules. Turns out the guy is there because he did this cave with his little brother years ago. It goes really deep and there’s a few water sections but when you get to the end there’s this amazing hidden spot with rock carvings or something. On their climb his brother panicked when they got down near the bottom where it’s really dark and there's water.

“And I got… short with him and he-” Pete cleared his throat. “He made a mistake and he died. I uh… I know it wasn’t really my fault but… I still think about all the ways I could have saved him, you know. Even though I logically know I did all I could. I got him out of the water and did CPR and I tried and it… I did everything right but… Do you ever have a moment where even though you did everything you could, more than anyone would have asked of you, when you nearly die yourself trying to save them and they still…”

“Yes,” Kara said softly.

Pete looked at her and nodded.

“Yeah, I guess you do.”

They’re quiet for a minute.

“I came out today to get something, his, his watch. It’s a dumb thing. A kid watch really with Snoopy on it for God’s sake. But he loved it because it was a gift from me. The first gift I gave him actually. We were… he’s my step brother. We didn’t get along at first. Classic step family issues. I thought he was trying to muscle in on my space with my dad and I didn’t want anyone replacing my mum and… well I was an idiot. when we were kids”

He sighed heavily and looked at her again.

“One day after school I was running late when I went to get my bike and I saw him getting his butt kicked by one of my friends and well... no one picks on my brother but me.”

Kara laughed softly.

“So I jump in started beating up my friend then a teacher came along because of all the noise. We all got in a lot of trouble until I managed to con this teacher into thinking we’d all had an accident on our bikes and well… I think she just pretended she believed us because we were all spouting the same story and it was late in the afternoon. But my brother’s watch got damaged and he was so weird about it at the time. He kept going on about how he would be late for all his music lessons without it so I dragged him into the first store I found with watches and bought him a cheap one just to shut him up. Then he never took it off.”

Pete smiled softly clearly lost in some memory. He let out a laugh.

“He showered with one hand up for four years because the damn thing wasn’t waterproof. I called him an idiot everytime I saw him do it but he always smiled back insisting it was his most prized possession. Proof his dumb jock brother did care.”

Pete fell silent for a moment.

“I just… the watch wasn’t on his body when they got him out. It’s um… it’s gotta be down there and I wanted to see if I could get it back. This isn’t my first time trying but it’s in the water, well I think it is. I wanted- I wanted to give it back to Mum. But she um… she died last year and I- I know it’s stupid. I know it’s just a watch and it doesn’t really matter. But I… Just finding it I’m sure it’ll give me… closure or something.”

Kara nodded.

She talks about something she had on Krypton, maybe the spy beacon with her aunt and how much it would mean to be able to have that again. We could get some nice closure discussion here about her feelings from the end of S01.

Kara breaks down crying again apologising to Pete and saying how she shouldn’t have been so wrapped up in her own issues that she let herself blow out her powers. If she hadn’t then she’d have been able to rescue him within minutes and… none of this would have happened if she’d just been better.

“Superman never has this problem. He always saves everyone!” she yelled frustrated.

Pete put his hand on her arm.

“Hey, no he doesn’t. No one can, not even superheroes. It’s not your job to save everyone Supergirl. You gotta put your own oxygen on first before you help others.” (if there's some cave diving saying that's similar just switch it out for that here)

Kara looked at him.

“But you’re going to die… and I- I can’t save you.”

Pete shrugged.

“That was going to happen anyway. You might not be able to save me because you blew out your powers but…” He gave her a very gentle smile. “Now I won’t die cold and alone in a dark cave. I’ll have someone here. Someone who will be able to tell my wife what happened to me, and where to find my body so she can bury me. Someone who will be able to tell her I love her and that I’m sorry for being such a stubborn fool and not listening to her.”

Pete’s fading a bit. Kara cries a bit.

“But I’m a hero, I’m supposed to save you!” she said.

He smiles at her.

“You don’t need to save me,” he whispered. “Just stay until the end.”

Then they hear voices in the distance. They both look up as powerful torches cut through the darkness above them.

“Pete!” someone calls. “Pete Davis! Are you able to respond? Your wife said to tell you you’re in big trouble!”

Pete laughed and looked at Kara.

“He’s down here!” she yelled.

Pete smiles at Kara.

“You know, you’re not the only hero around here Supergirl. Sometimes us humans manage to save each other.”

Kara laughed and hugged him as a rope was dropped down and a man in rescue gear dropped down with them.

“Hi- Supergirl!”

She gave him an awkward smile.

“Hi, I uh, kinda blew out my powers and crash landed here…”

“And she still came to help me,” Pete muttered. "Kept me from freezing to death before you got here."

The rescue guy laughs and then smiles at Kara.

“Even powerless you’re is still saving someone.”

Kara smiles back and awkwardly shrugs.

“I guess so.”

Pete smiles at her and then there’s more search and rescue guys coming down. They’re looking at the big rock and Kara says if they can let her use a radio she can get someone to help with that.

“Superman?”

“I know someone a bit more local.”

J’onn arrives (as Martian Manhunter) and lifts the rock so the rescue team can get Pete out and onto a stretcher medical personnel already working on him.

Kara says something to J’onn and he nods.

Then we see Pete in an ambulance and Kara comes over and holds out a watch (covered in grime but we can see Snoopy on it). Pete takes it and holds it close.

“Thank you,” he said. “For… for coming when you did. I was starting to lose hope.”

“I think I should be the one thanking you, for the reminder,” she replied.

“Reminder of what?”

“Of what this symbol means.”

She taps the symbol on her chest.

“Superhero?”

“No, El Mayarah. Stronger together. I had kind of forgotten that meant I didn’t have to do everything alone.”

Pete nods they smile at each other for a moment then we hear Alex racing over.

“Supergirl!”

“Alex!”

We get a lovely emotional Danvers sisters hug. Then Alex telling Kara off and threatening her for pulling a stunt like that and she’s going to be under the sunlamps the moment they get back and she better not complain about it because after the night she’s put her through…

Camera backs up showing Kara cowering slightly as Alex gives her hell for the stress she’s experienced. Kara nodding and the ambulance doors closing as Pete smiles at Kara.

(And as a little continuation progression thing)

At the start of the next episode when she’s going int to work or something as a little visual of her moving on a bit we see her phone screen is of her and Alex or, because I am supercorp trash, her and Lena.

[watchmegetobsessed]

Never Have I Ever - Harry Styles (part 4)

i hope yall enjoyed the last part, we took a sudden and quite dirty turn ther,e but we are heading down romantic street and its all sweet and cute with a little hotness. let me know what you thought about the part!

pairing: Harry x actress!reader

word count: 4.7k

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

Harry Styles managed to leave quite the impression in you following his late night visit after the Emmys. He surely surprised you with not only the unbelievable orgasm he gave you with his talented fingers, but also with how big of a gentleman he really was, so keen on taking you out on a date first before he would kiss you. The timeline got a little messed up and he did apologize before he left at two in the morning for getting too carried away, but you assured him he didn’t do anything you didn’t want him to. To be honest, you wouldn’t have had a word against him kissing you right away, but you liked the respect he had for you, not something you’ve had plenty of lately. The men you dealt with in the past year were eager to get into your pants without the respect part, only hungry to earn fame through you, trying to blind you with sex so you wouldn’t realize their ugly motives.

This was not a threat when it came to Harry, he was just as famous as you, maybe even more. He had his own career, his own money, his own life apart from yours and he clearly wasn’t trying to use you and it was quite a refreshing change for you.

He stayed and the two of you talked so much, just sharing crazy stories from your life before and after fame, enjoying that you had someone who shared more or less the same background as you. Apart from Florence, you pretty much kept your old friends when your career took off, afraid to make new ones, always feeling a little paranoid that new people would have unholy motives when they try to befriend you.

Though you truly love your friends, they don’t really see behind the life you are living, while Harry completely does. His company is the best you’ve had in a long time, he is able to make you completely forget about everything outside the room you two are in.

You tried your best to hide your disappointment when he left that night. After offering him to stay in one of your guest bedrooms, he politely turned it down, and even though you could tell he wanted to stay, the urge to be a gentleman was greater in him, something you admire him for.

He left with the promise to see you soon on a real date and he got you as excited as a little school girl on the day of a fieldtrip.

However, given the lifestyles you two were living, finding a suitable evening for the both of you turns out to be a bigger struggle than you expected. Harry reaches out right the next day after his little visit. A good morning text waits for you by the time you open your eyes in the noon and by the evening he asks you out, however you have to realize the date has to wait a little.

You have two trip outside the city upcoming in the next two weeks and he is also planning to fly back to London for a while, the trips totally crashing in the timeline, not even having just the smallest window that would fit the both of you.

Accepting the fact that it would have to wait a little longer, you keep in close touch, eager to find the date that would finally be suitable for you and him as well. Endless texts, sweet calls and sneaky FaceTimes scatter through the days you spend apart and you find it hard to think of a time when he wasn’t hitting you up all the time.

On a Thursday evening, after a long day of fittings for upcoming events, you find yourself sitting on your couch with a sweet glass of wine, scrolling through your social media feeds when something catches your eyes.

Harry has been away in Los Angeles in the past few days and he mentioned having an interview the other day, but you didn’t think it would be out so soon, but here it was, a short video clip cut out by some random page that had a rather interesting title.

“Harry Styles talks about next album and mystery girl in his life.”

Your curiosity is way too strong not to click on it and have a look at it, so taking a sip from your wine you tap on the link and let the video load.

“It’s been some time since your last album came out, have you been working on new music lately?” the interviewer asked from behind the camera as Harry sat on a lilac sofa, wearing black high-waisted pants with a pink and white floral printed shirt tugged into it, his suspenders topping the look perfectly. His green eyes are fixed on the person asking him as he nods.

“Yeah, I think I never really stop making new music. I do have sessions when I’m trying to put a new album together, but I also write in the meantime as well, whenever I have an idea or inspiration. I don’t hold back,” he adds with a cheeky smile.

“Have you found any inspiration lately?” the question is heard and Harry nods once again.

“I have, actually,” he answers shortly, but his smirk gives it away that there’s a lot more behind his words and you feel your heart flutter in your chest. Is he talking about you?

“Has it been a person?” the reporter inquires, making Harry’s smile grow wider.

“A lot of things and people inspire me.”

“Alright, and is your latest inspiration something or someone new in your life?” the guy tries again, even though it’s well known that Harry likes to give vague answers instead of straight yeses and nos.

“Kind of new,” he simply answers and the reporter realizes he won’t be sharing more about the topic so he moves on with the next question and the video cuts out right there.

Though it wasn’t mentioned that he was talking about someone in particular, his fans drew the assumption that he is definitely seeing someone who has been his inspiration behind his new music. Feeling bold and a little flirty, you open up your messages and send him a quick text.

“A kind of new inspiration, huh?”

His reply comes almost right away, as always.

“Have you been stalking fanpages about me?”

“Would it be weird?”

“From you? It’s flattering. Little scary, but in a good way.”

You can’t help but chuckle reading his words. He never fails to make you laugh, you find his humor your favorite kind, never hurtful, but a little spicy, if you could say that, a lot of irony laced into it.

“Back to the topic: what’s your inspiration? Or should I ask… who is your inspiration?”

“Not gonna beat around the bush and just admit it…”

You wait and wait… and wait, but nothing comes afterwards and you are dying to have him admit that it’s been you, but not even the three dots appear at the bottom, so you take the lead again.

“Well, do it. Admit it, Styles!”

The fucker likes your message right away, meaning he has been in the thread all along, waiting for you to write something.

“Alright, but don’t tell anyone, because she is kinda famous and I don’t want the media to find out about it.”

“You have my silence.”

You watch the three dots dance at the bottom, holding your breath while you sink your teeth into your bottom lip, trying to contain your wide grin that’s been plastered across your face this whole time.

When the text finally arrives you snort loudly, almost spilling your wine, laughing so hard you are happy you don’t like in a tiny apartment anymore with paper walls, because your neighbor would have definitely heard your laughter all the way down the hallway.

“It’s Betty White. Fuck, she is all I can think about.”

You need a minute to stop the laughter and type your reply.

“She is hot, gotta give you that.”

“Right?? I hope she is not afraid to date younger guys though.”

“I’m sure she would make an exception for you.”

“I hope so too.”

There’s a short pause, where you just read back his lines, chuckling to yourself some more. He always has a witty comment or comeback, no matter what you’re talking about and not once has he made you laugh madly on a set, at a meeting or just lying in bed before going to sleep.

“Joke aside, would it scare you away if I said I have definitely written about you?”

“Is this another theoretical question? Like the one you asked me on Ellen?”

You smile to yourself thinking back at the conversation the two of you had on the show when he was trying to figure out if you’d be up to give him your number.

“Maybe. So theoretically, would that be weird to you?”

“No,” you write, but quickly send another text. “But you know, it’s just theory. You’d have to tell me for real to find out.”

“Should have saw that coming…”

“Yeah, you really should have,” you muse to yourself, finishing up your glass and you carefully put it to your coffee table before sliding further down on the couch to get back to the conversation with Harry. You see that he hasn’t sent anything after his last one, so you decide to actually answer his question.

“Joke aside from my part, I wouldn’t find it weird. I think it’s flattering.”

“Okay, because I was ready to burn all my notes if you said it would be too much.”

“What if you’d be burning a Grammy worthy song though?”

“Would be a shame. But I would still burn it for you.”

“You are such a flirt…”

“Can’t help it! Or should I not be?”

“I like it. So don’t change.”

“Noted.”

Your little conversation has to come to an end since he is about to go into a meeting, but when you say your goodbyes and decide it’s time to head to bed, you already know a text will be waiting for you when you wake up in the morning.

Days and even weeks go by and you start to have a little too much on your plate. No matter how much you love your job and that it has always been your dream, sometimes you just need a breather. In the past week you’ve been in and out of auditions for a movie they keep top secret, you didn’t even get a script, just a few pages you had to memorize and they’ve been asking for more and more tapes from you with kind of absurd requests, but your agent told you it’s something major, that’s why they are so secretive. However, when they ask you to come in for another reading for the fifth time in seven days and you still don’t know what you are really auditioning for, you are kind of starting to have enough with all your other projects running at the same time. Your days start at six in the morning and rarely end before eleven in the night.

An entire month after the night Harry came over to your place, you kind of lose patience. The frustration that’s been building up inside you just simply bursts when your agent texts you on your way home that you’d have to go in for another casting in the morning for the same mystery movie.

“Have they not seen my face enough?” you snap, hands meeting the wheel as you keep your eyes on the road ahead of you.

“I’m sorry, Hun. I know it’s annoying, but they requested you, that means you are still an option for them.” Mona’s voice comes through the speakers of the car since your phone is connected to it.

“Do they need me to read the whole fucking Bible in front of a camera or what?” you growl.

“I have a good feeling about this last one, alright? And if they still can’t decide after that, we can always just say that we want out.”

“Then I would be labelled as the problematic little princess,” you sigh, knowing well how this industry works. Just one mistake and you can easily end up in a theoretical ditch.

“Just hold on a little longer, okay? I’ll send you the details in email and we’ll talk more tomorrow.”

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Bye, girl.”

Mona is an angel. She’s been your agent for about five years now, she is the one who gets you into castings, well, at least that’s what she was doing before you managed to reach your breakthrough. She got your name on lists you couldn’t even dare to dream of and she is the reason why you are here today. Now she mostly handles requests for you to go in for castings, creators started to reach out to you a while ago, though Mona still works her magic sometimes to get you into castings that are still out of your league.

By the time you get home, you are desperate to do something. Anything. You’ve been nonstop working these past weeks and you just need to get out of this loop that sucked you in. Before you could even think through what you’re doing, you dial Harry’s number.

He is back in the city, that you know of because he texted even before he got home. You both ditched the idea of having your date today, because you just knew it would be a long day for you, and it’s the truth, it’s past ten, so not quite ideal for a date, but you ran out of fucks to give.

“Y/N? Everything alright?” he asks, noticing that you called, which is not what you usually do, or at least not without checking in if he is free to talk.

“Yeah, sorry I called so randomly. Are you busy?” you ask, feeling a little out of breath, even though you definitely didn’t do anything physically hard. You just can’t help but feel anxious since you are about to ask him out on a spontaneous date.

“No, just… packing and all that. What’s up?”

“So you don’t have anything to do right now?” you clear up.

“No,” he chuckles.

“Alright, so then… what do you say we have that date now?”

Even with him always being so blunt and open about how interested he is in you, it still makes you perfect to ask him out. The silence that comes from his side doesn’t necessarily help either and you are already preparing yourself to get rejected.

“You know it’s ten pm, right?” he then asks, a little unsure if you really thought it through.

“I am aware, yes.”

“Don’t you have work in the morning? I know you always start your days so early, I don’t want to be the reason why yo—“

“Harry,” you stop him midsentence. “I do not give a fuck about what I’m doing in the morning,” you bluntly tell him and you can tell he is smiling on the other end of the call. “So the question is still the same. Do you want to have that date now?”

He doesn’t ask anything else, just simply say the following: “I’ll pick you up in thirty.”

“Make it twenty,” you tell him and end the call before he could protest.

Ignoring the adrenaline rush you that just washed over your body you quickly make your way to the bathroom to take the quickest cold shower before putting on some clean clothes. You really don’t want to overdo it, knowing well since it’s so abrupt he wouldn’t be taking you anywhere that would require you look spotless. You choose not to put on any makeup, not just because you don’t have the time, but also because you feel a weird urge to just be bare, be yourself around him. The same goes for your outfit. You put aside all designer clothes and opt for a simple pair of jeans, a black tank top and a bright yellow knitted jumper over it, looking awfully casual, but feeling rather comfortable.

It takes Harry 22 minutes to get to your place, but you choose not to comment on those two extra minutes when you get into his car. Luckily, he isn’t dressed to impress either, wearing a simple pair of jeans with some kind of washed out, vintage printed tee shirt with his Bode Jacket he has worn in his famous SNL episode. His hair looks a little mess and even wet, making you wonder if your call caught him in the middle of a shower or he showered after you agreed to meet up.

“Long time no see,” he smiles at you, his boyish smirk making your heart flutter so easily as he eyes you while you buckle yourself up.

“You had plenty of paparazzi photos to look at in the meantime, Mr. Styles,” you smirk at him teasingly as he starts the car and leaves from in front of your complex.

“My favorite was the ones of you where you were walking out of a restaurant wearing that silk dress and the coat.”

“So you did see pap pictures?” you ask chuckling, you didn’t mean it entirely, but you find it funny that he actually saw pictures of you.

“You know, it’s been hard to avoid you online, especially because I keep liking all your posts so my phone thinks I’m interested in you. Which is true, and I’m not complaining about the content I’ve been seeing about you lately,” he admits chuckling and your eyes wander down to his ring clad fingers on the wheel. Your thoughts take you back to when they were touching you at places you haven’t been touched in a while. How they felt inside you and how desperate he could make you with just his hands.

You force yourself to look away from his hands and focus on the present time before your arousal becomes way too evident.

“Sorry I’m everywhere,” you smirk at him, enjoying the situation maybe a little too much.

“Don’t be,” he chuckles, glancing in your way for a moment, his green eyes meeting your gaze. “I don’t mind it,” he adds and those damn butterflies as quick to act up again in your stomach.

You don’t try to get him to tell where you are headed, wanting it to be a surprise yourself, so you just stare out at the night city as it runs past you, still quite a lot of people walking on the streets even though it’s now nearing eleven.

What you know is that you’re still in Manhattan and it seems like you won’t leave it either. Harry navigates his way through the city easily, he is not even using GPS, something you could never do. No matter how long you’ve been living here, you’ll always get lost in this jungle some call New York City. About fifteen minutes after leaving your complex, Harry parks the car down in a spot he found along the road, and looking out the window you’re trying to figure out where you are, but it doesn’t ring a bell. Seems just like a usual part of the Upper West Side, so now he has you curious about his plans.

“Where did you bring me, Mr. Styles?” you ask him as the two of you meet on the sidewalk and he glances at your with a sly smirk.

“Since you gave me such a short notice about our date, I thought I would show you one of my favorite places in the city and I hope you haven’t it.” “Well, I can assure you I don’t know it, because I have no idea what could be here,” you admit.

Harry nods at you to follow him and you walk side by side until the next corner.

“I think you already know that I’m English,” he starts off, making you chuckle.

“Yeah, it’s pretty evident,” you nod.

“So, in the past decade I haven’t spent as much time in the UK as I wanted, and a few years ago I discovered a little piece of my home in the city.”

Trying to figure out what he meant by that you don’t even realize where you just took a turn to. Harry stops and you snap out of your thoughts, looking up and seeing a charming little street ahead you, looking totally out of place in the city’s fashion. The townhouses all the way down look like they’ve been placed here straight from England, the Tudor style complex is a refreshing change in the fast paced, busy streets of Manhattan.

You can’t help but gasp at the sight in front of you, taking in every tiny detail with your eager eyes as the feeling of being in a fairytale takes over your mind. If only it weren’t for the busy noises of the streets around the micro-neighborhood, you would completely believe that you’ve been magically teleported to England.

“It’s called the Pomander Walk. Always makes me feel like I’m home away from home whenever I miss my family and my hometown.”

Harry starts walking down the narrow pavement that runs between the houses, lined with quite some greenery, something you noticed right away. There are just so many plants and flowers down the street, it’s pretty clear the residents keep them in good care.

You catch up with Harry, eyes still taking in the pleasant contrast Pomander Walk has to offer for any visitors.

“I feel like we are invaders,” you tell him. It looks so secluded, makes you feel like you weren’t even supposed to be here.

“Don’t worry, it’s totally public. The people who live here are pretty nice too. Love it when someone comes around.”

“How did you find this place?”

“A friend told me about it and just came to see it for myself one day,” he tells you as the two of you slowly make your way down the street, slow enough so you could see everything. “There are 61 units and they were built in 1921 by Thomas J. Healy. He originally wanted to build a hotel here, but didn’t have the money to just yet, so he built these instead to make some cash for the hotel. He never got to do that though, died a few years later, so Pomander Walk stayed.” You listen to him, soaking in every word that leaves his lips, finding his oddly specific knowledge about this place quite exciting and… kinda hot. You could listen to him talk about historical facts for days without getting bored.

“The whole complex was renovated in 2009, they restored a bunch of architectural details that lost through the years.”

“Looks fantastic. I wonder what they look like on the inside,” you muse, your eyes wandering over the colorfully painted old school window blinds on most of the townhouses.

Walking down the pavement you realize there’s not a single soul around here, something you don’t get to experience too often in the city.

“It’s not too well-known, right? I don’t see any tourists and all that.”

Harry shakes his head, eyes ahead of him as he hides his hands in his pockets.

“No, ‘s quite hidden, not often listed in sights to be seen in the city. That’s why I like to come here so much.”

“Easy to stay unnoticed,” you add with a smile as your eyes meet his gaze and he nods, returning the smile.

You walk back and forth on the street at least five times, just talking and sharing and laughing, finally falling out of the misery of your everydays. He still amazes you with how good of a company he is, with his broad view of life and many experiences, you can truly connect with him on a level you haven’t been able to reach with anyone in a long time.

It’s way over midnight when you head back to his car, holding hands that happened at a point earlier, but you can’t tell who reached for who. It was kind of mutual, but now you didn’t want to let go of him… ever. You let your fingers play with his S ring on his pinky while he keeps running his thumb over the back of your hand whenever he has the chance. It’s a little disappointing when you have to let go of each other when you climb back into his car and head back home.

“I know this date wasn’t much, but I hope you liked it,” he smiles at you shyly before his eyes snap back at the road ahead of him.

“Shut up, this was literally the best date I’ve had,” you tell him making him chuckle. “Thank you for showing it to me.”

“Now it’s your secret place too. Maybe we’ll run into each other here one day.”

“I’ll definitely come back,” you admit smirking.

The city lights pass by you faster than you want them to, and you arrive to your complex way too early. Well, not according to the time, because it’s way past half past midnight now, but you just don’t want the night to end. However, you know Harry would not come up if you asked. He is way too big of a gentleman and he wouldn’t want to make you miss your appointment in the morning, but you are definitely collecting that kiss he promised a month or so ago.

“Walk me up, will you?” you ask him softly when he parks down in front of your building. He nods and follows you inside without a second thought.

You both know it’s about to happen, the air thickens between you two in the elevator and neither of you can hold back the small smiles on your lips. Harry walks next to you until you reach your front door and you turn to face him, his green eyes already examining your every move.

“I’m happy we finally got to do this,” you tell him, feeling a blush warming your cheeks from the way he looks at you now.

“I’m glad you called. Was starting to think we would never meet again,” he chuckles making you laugh as well. It really did feel like the universe was plotting against you, but you bet it didn’t expect your sudden move tonight.

There’s a longer pause where neither of you knows what to say or do next and your patience is running low, especially when you see him run his tongue over his pink lips. You just can’t wait any longer to taste them.

“Harry,” you breathe out, the frustration and desire at an all-time high now in your system. Never in your life did it take this long for you to get to a kiss with a guy you were clearly interested in and who returned the feeling as well.

“Yeah?”

“Swear to my lost Emmy Award if you don’t kiss me right now I’ll—“

You don’t get to finish, you don’t even know what you’d have said, but it’s all forgotten when Harry kisses you hard, hands cupping your jaw on both sides, angling your head to grant him the best access to your lips. You return the kiss without a second thought, hungrily tugging and pulling on his lips, your tongues meeting in the middle and fuck! He really knows how to make your toes curl with just a kiss. You grab a fistful of his t-shirt at his stomach, pulling him close and the cold touch of his rings on your skin makes you shudder. Everything about him makes your legs turn into jelly and you are willingly offering yourself to him without a doubt.

He pushes you against your front door, one of his hands wanders down to your waist and he gives it a gentle squeeze that makes you open your mouth more for him. You are a mess and so is he. You have no idea how long you make out, but when you eventually pull back, your chest is heaving and your lips feel swollen. Harry pecks your lips two more times before forcing himself to let go of you.

“Good night, Y/N,” he murmurs in a low voice as he starts to back towards the elevator.

“Good night, Harry,” you say a little out of breath. He smirks at you one last time before walking into the elevator and the doors close, officially ending your first date.

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